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1
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:17,974
[screaming]
2
00:00:18,844 --> 00:00:20,803
[struggling, muffled screaming]
3
00:00:22,935 --> 00:00:25,677
[tense piano notes]
4
00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:47,482
- [Brianna] I got it.
- [squealing with laughter]
5
00:00:48,831 --> 00:00:53,096
[Calvin]
Beware the tickle monster.
6
00:00:53,270 --> 00:00:57,448
Tickle monster can
attack any place, any time.
7
00:00:57,622 --> 00:00:59,102
[kids giggling]
8
00:00:59,276 --> 00:01:02,540
The tickle monster
can attack across
9
00:01:02,714 --> 00:01:06,066
very strong Wi-Fi connections.
10
00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:10,983
[Brianna]
Stop it, tickle monster!
11
00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:12,376
Sorry, girls.
12
00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,943
[Brianna]
I miss you, Daddy.
13
00:01:14,117 --> 00:01:17,338
Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
14
00:01:17,816 --> 00:01:20,254
I know it's not
a real tickle. I'm sorry.
15
00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:22,778
- [kids yelling, indistinct]
- No tickle monster tonight.
16
00:01:22,952 --> 00:01:24,867
Tonight--
tonight's mommy's bedtime.
17
00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:26,608
[Brianna]
Oh, no.
18
00:01:26,782 --> 00:01:28,349
I know. I'm sorry.
19
00:01:28,392 --> 00:01:30,220
[Brianna]
No, not Mommy. Boo, boo.
20
00:01:30,394 --> 00:01:33,702
We all know mommy's
bedtime is super duper boring.
21
00:01:33,876 --> 00:01:35,269
What's the--
what's the story tonight?
22
00:01:37,009 --> 00:01:39,055
I said, what-- what story
are you going to read tonight?
23
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,752
[Brianna]
[creepy voice] Scary story!
24
00:01:40,926 --> 00:01:45,279
Okay. Well, all right.
Tell Mommy-- tell your mother
25
00:01:45,453 --> 00:01:47,150
she has to do the voices.
26
00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:48,151
[Brianna] Daddy does
fun voices like this--
27
00:01:48,195 --> 00:01:49,152
Yeah.
28
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:50,762
[girl doing silly voices]
29
00:01:50,936 --> 00:01:53,504
Yeah. Yeah, Mommy
always does half assed voices.
30
00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:55,811
Yeah, she does half assed--
31
00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:57,378
Tell her she does
half assed voices.
32
00:01:57,552 --> 00:01:59,119
Tell her she has to commit.
33
00:02:00,642 --> 00:02:03,862
She can't skimp out
on the voices. No, no, no.
34
00:02:03,906 --> 00:02:07,170
[Brianna] Can you make a video
of you doing the voice?
35
00:02:07,344 --> 00:02:09,825
Hey, can-- Brianna,
can you put Mommy on?
36
00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:12,654
[kid continuing to vocalize]
37
00:02:12,828 --> 00:02:14,569
Brianna? Tell-- tell--
38
00:02:14,743 --> 00:02:18,050
tell Mommy Daddy
wants to talk to her.
39
00:02:18,094 --> 00:02:19,400
[Brianna]
Love you, Daddy.
40
00:02:19,574 --> 00:02:22,664
Well, I love you,
sweetheart. I love you.
41
00:02:22,838 --> 00:02:24,970
I love both of you so much,
and I miss you so much.
42
00:02:25,014 --> 00:02:26,146
[Brianna] When are
you coming home, Daddy?
43
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:27,712
And I'll see you
Sunday night, okay?
44
00:02:27,756 --> 00:02:29,018
[Brianna]
When are you coming back?
45
00:02:29,192 --> 00:02:30,324
Yeah, I'll be back Sunday.
46
00:02:30,367 --> 00:02:32,021
[Brianna] Bye!
47
00:02:32,064 --> 00:02:34,066
♪ Like cognac,
I'm a big threat♪
48
00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:35,938
♪ I just came to sight see
and get your bitch wet ♪
49
00:02:35,981 --> 00:02:37,940
♪ Ooh, that's a big flex ♪
50
00:02:37,983 --> 00:02:39,463
♪ Stock going up like ♪
51
00:02:39,637 --> 00:02:41,509
I know it's a--
I know it's a cliché,
52
00:02:41,683 --> 00:02:44,773
and everyone thinks this about
their collegiate experience,
53
00:02:44,947 --> 00:02:46,731
but what I truly believe--
54
00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:50,822
But I truly believe MSC is
the best school on the face of
55
00:02:50,996 --> 00:02:53,869
the earth, and all of you
guys are the best classmates
56
00:02:54,043 --> 00:02:55,523
a guy could ever want.
57
00:02:56,437 --> 00:02:58,743
[gulping]
58
00:02:58,787 --> 00:03:01,268
♪ Like a crack addict, see
the numbers, think it's ♪
59
00:03:01,442 --> 00:03:03,444
We all know Bill
is the best athlete
60
00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:04,967
in the alumni association.
61
00:03:06,011 --> 00:03:09,885
That is, if you consider
slurping clam chowder a sport.
62
00:03:09,928 --> 00:03:12,366
♪ You might see me posted up
on Rosa Parks down the road ♪
63
00:03:12,540 --> 00:03:14,629
I'm just kidding, Bill.
64
00:03:14,672 --> 00:03:16,587
♪ Got the coldest flow,
and the coldest heart,♪
65
00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:21,070
Ed here, when he takes out his
pitching wedge, I'd like to...
66
00:03:23,942 --> 00:03:26,597
pitch him the idea of just
tossing all of his clubs
67
00:03:26,771 --> 00:03:30,079
in the lake, instead of trying
to get out of that sand trap.
68
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:32,386
I just feel bad
for the sand, you know?
69
00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:34,953
I just feel bad for the sand.
70
00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:36,694
♪ Text, shit, ♪
71
00:03:36,738 --> 00:03:38,392
♪ I couldn't tell
from these big chains ♪
72
00:03:38,435 --> 00:03:39,958
♪ I couldn't tell ♪
73
00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:43,223
Let this be the best reunion
that has ever been.
74
00:03:44,093 --> 00:03:46,269
I mean, maybe I'm being
hyperbolic about that,
75
00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:51,013
but I-- I can think of
no other place I'd rather be.
76
00:03:51,187 --> 00:03:52,493
And that's just--
77
00:03:53,494 --> 00:03:56,453
This is so stupid.
I sound like a fucking idiot.
78
00:04:03,939 --> 00:04:07,334
[woman moaning]
79
00:04:08,944 --> 00:04:12,774
- [woman] Oh, shi--
- [skin slapping]
80
00:04:12,948 --> 00:04:14,776
[woman moaning]
81
00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:18,823
[light jazz instrumental]
82
00:04:31,749 --> 00:04:33,534
[chair dragging]
83
00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:38,843
[phone ringing]
84
00:04:39,017 --> 00:04:41,150
[sighing]
Oh, God.
85
00:04:41,324 --> 00:04:43,021
[phone ringing]
86
00:04:43,761 --> 00:04:46,155
Hey, Mike. What's going on, man?
Are you on the--
87
00:04:47,069 --> 00:04:48,679
Hey, can you
take me off speaker?
88
00:04:48,853 --> 00:04:50,290
Yeah, just take me off speaker.
89
00:04:51,116 --> 00:04:52,640
Yeah, man,
I'm here. That's why I'm--
90
00:04:52,814 --> 00:04:54,381
Yeah, I got here,
like, way early, and I'm, like,
91
00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:56,818
setting up all
this shit myself.
92
00:04:56,992 --> 00:04:58,689
Is there, like,
there's, like, nobody here yet.
93
00:04:58,863 --> 00:05:01,083
None of the alumni association,
none of the outreach guys.
94
00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:03,041
No-- nobody's here.
Nothing's set up yet,
95
00:05:03,215 --> 00:05:05,522
and we've got, like, three hours
before 300 people show up.
96
00:05:07,089 --> 00:05:08,482
I said,
we've got three hours before--
97
00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,353
Hey, Mike, can you just
take me off speaker?
98
00:05:10,527 --> 00:05:11,789
Just take me off speaker.
99
00:05:12,877 --> 00:05:14,270
[sighing]
All right, man.
100
00:05:14,444 --> 00:05:17,273
Well, don't leave me hanging.
101
00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:18,796
Hurry up and I'll
hold down the fort.
102
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,451
For Christ's sake, Mike.
103
00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:24,585
Take me off speaker.
I said I'll hold down the fort.
104
00:05:25,586 --> 00:05:29,677
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay, fine.
105
00:05:29,851 --> 00:05:32,549
Yep. Yeah. All right, bye.
106
00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:41,297
Oh, sorry. Registration
doesn't open 'til 5:30.
107
00:05:41,471 --> 00:05:44,344
Can you come back in a couple
hours? You're here for the--
108
00:05:44,518 --> 00:05:45,867
You're looking
for the reunion, right?
109
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:47,782
The-- the main event
starts at noon tomorrow,
110
00:05:47,956 --> 00:05:49,523
and I'm not supposed to, um--
111
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:53,178
I can't technically
sign you in until 5:30 today.
112
00:05:55,224 --> 00:05:56,443
You know, tell you what,
113
00:05:56,617 --> 00:05:57,705
if it's easier for you
to do just--
114
00:05:57,879 --> 00:05:59,489
Do you want to just do it now?
115
00:05:59,663 --> 00:06:01,578
I can just get it done so
you don't have to do it later.
116
00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:04,015
I'll just-- Let me just
go ahead and register you.
117
00:06:04,189 --> 00:06:05,321
What's your name?
118
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,236
[Rachel]
Rachel Lerner.
119
00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:11,414
[Calvin] Rachel?
120
00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:16,245
No way! Holy shit.
121
00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:17,942
[Rachel]
Surprise, surprise.
122
00:06:18,116 --> 00:06:21,772
Oh, it is a surprise party
up in here. This is--
123
00:06:23,905 --> 00:06:27,430
Wow, this is crazy. This is
certifiable. I mean.
124
00:06:27,952 --> 00:06:29,519
Oh, wow.
125
00:06:29,693 --> 00:06:31,303
- [Calvin] I totally didn't--
- You don't recognize me?
126
00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:34,611
I mean, no. Of course,
I-- Yes, I recognize you.
127
00:06:34,785 --> 00:06:38,441
It just took me a minute
to, uh, I can't believe this.
128
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:39,964
I can't believe you're here.
129
00:06:40,704 --> 00:06:41,662
Ta-da
130
00:06:41,836 --> 00:06:44,969
Ta-da! Rachel Lerner.
131
00:06:45,143 --> 00:06:46,884
Calvin Green.
132
00:06:48,059 --> 00:06:51,367
I mean, how have you--
How've you been?
133
00:06:51,541 --> 00:06:52,716
It's been a minute.
134
00:06:52,890 --> 00:06:54,457
[Rachel]
It has been a minute.
135
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,067
Um, should I-- Do you
want me to come back later?
136
00:06:56,111 --> 00:06:57,112
- I'm a little, uh--
- [Calvin] No.
137
00:06:57,286 --> 00:06:58,635
Apparently, I'm a little early.
138
00:06:58,809 --> 00:07:00,681
No. Early bird
catches the, uh you know...
139
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:03,379
I'll just-- Let me
just get you signed in now.
140
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:04,772
I just gotta find your name.
141
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:06,295
It'll-- It'll take me
two seconds.
142
00:07:06,469 --> 00:07:09,080
It's-- Wow.
It's really good to see you.
143
00:07:09,603 --> 00:07:11,518
You were not
expecting to see me, huh?
144
00:07:11,692 --> 00:07:15,173
[laughing] I didn't know
what to expect, who to expect.
145
00:07:15,347 --> 00:07:16,523
Uh...
146
00:07:16,697 --> 00:07:18,350
I mean, you look--
You look amazing.
147
00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:20,178
- Seriously.
- Oh, [scoffing] look at you,
148
00:07:20,352 --> 00:07:23,051
Mister 'I'm wearing
pastel shirt,' Mr. 'Chinos.'
149
00:07:23,225 --> 00:07:24,705
[Calvin]
Is this what you call pastel?
150
00:07:24,879 --> 00:07:27,011
You look good,
Mr. Fancy Pants.
151
00:07:27,185 --> 00:07:29,013
You, on the other hand...
152
00:07:29,187 --> 00:07:30,798
- [Rachel] Stop.
- No, no, no, no. You--
153
00:07:30,972 --> 00:07:33,714
I mean, like,
the cliché thing of, like,
154
00:07:33,888 --> 00:07:37,326
you look exactly the same,
but it's seriously true.
155
00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:40,155
It's like you
look exactly the same.
156
00:07:40,329 --> 00:07:42,679
I mean, can you
recommend a moisturizer?
157
00:07:42,853 --> 00:07:44,899
Should I be
moisturizing this shit?
158
00:07:45,073 --> 00:07:46,509
[Rachel]
I've aged. Trust me.
159
00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:48,032
Wait and see
this weekend, though.
160
00:07:48,206 --> 00:07:50,165
Half the guys are
going to have hair plugs.
161
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:53,255
The women will have
Botox, spray tans, and Spanx.
162
00:07:53,429 --> 00:07:54,865
It's like, who do
you think you're kidding?
163
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:57,215
Do you actually think
you're fooling anybody?
164
00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,479
Everyone can see
right through you.
165
00:08:00,915 --> 00:08:02,351
You're old!
166
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:07,835
Old-ish. I'm like, you
know, just a little bit old,
167
00:08:08,009 --> 00:08:10,620
it's just like a little--
Like a-- like a middle old.
168
00:08:11,142 --> 00:08:12,535
[Rachel]
Time flies.
169
00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:14,494
- [Calvin] Eh, time flies.
- When you're having fun.
170
00:08:17,192 --> 00:08:20,195
You keep setting up,
if you-- Don't let me stop you.
171
00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:21,936
[Calvin]
This weekend should be, uh...
172
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:26,462
I mean, fun is maybe not
the right-- Maybe totally weird
173
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:29,160
and flashback-y is
the more appropriate, uh...
174
00:08:30,858 --> 00:08:32,686
And it should be interesting,
to say the least.
175
00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:34,122
[Rachel] It's bound
to be full of surprises.
176
00:08:34,296 --> 00:08:35,471
[Calvin]
Oh, no big surprise.
177
00:08:35,645 --> 00:08:37,212
Jell-O shots will be
in full swing.
178
00:08:37,386 --> 00:08:38,996
I mean, people think
they can take a time machine
179
00:08:39,170 --> 00:08:41,564
and drink how
they drank in undergrad,
180
00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:42,826
which is just not-- You know,
181
00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:45,089
it's not possible,
or advisable.
182
00:08:45,263 --> 00:08:46,961
[Rachel] Yeah, you're
preaching to the choir.
183
00:08:47,135 --> 00:08:49,441
Now, you used to-- You could
always hold your own in terms
184
00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:52,880
of-- You could drink me under
the-- I was a lightweight.
185
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,751
[Rachel] I was the heavyweight
champion of the world.
186
00:08:54,925 --> 00:08:57,928
You could drink a screwdriver
in, like, 0.5 seconds,
187
00:08:58,102 --> 00:09:00,540
like, uh, record speed, like--
188
00:09:01,932 --> 00:09:03,020
"Rachel,
where did your drink go?"
189
00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:04,761
[Rachel]
Down the hatch.
190
00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:06,546
- Down the hatch, high tolerance.
- High tolerance. Yep.
191
00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,112
You never even
seemed that tipsy.
192
00:09:08,286 --> 00:09:10,158
Yeah, you were
Mr. Tipsy after half a beer.
193
00:09:10,332 --> 00:09:11,681
Two sips, two sips
194
00:09:11,855 --> 00:09:14,684
I was-- Oh, man, I was--
talk about a cheap date.
195
00:09:14,858 --> 00:09:16,599
- I was not a big drinker.
- [Rachel] Like me?
196
00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:17,992
The biggest lush
in the Big Ten?
197
00:09:18,166 --> 00:09:19,515
[Calvin]
Well, no, you weren't a lush.
198
00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,125
You weren't,
like, a sloppy drunk.
199
00:09:21,299 --> 00:09:22,866
It's not like you
were out getting wasted.
200
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:24,781
Well, I got wasted once.
201
00:09:24,955 --> 00:09:26,435
That was the first
and last time I drank
202
00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:28,089
a solo cup full of whiskey.
203
00:09:28,655 --> 00:09:31,092
- [phone ringing]
- Ooh.
204
00:09:33,181 --> 00:09:34,312
Hey. What's up?
205
00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:39,622
Yeah. I thought we're
going to try and hold my calls.
206
00:09:39,796 --> 00:09:42,712
Is this about the-- Yeah,
tell them it's a long position.
207
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:45,410
It's a long position and we're
going long on turbines,
208
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:46,934
the turbine
portfolio is long.
209
00:09:48,022 --> 00:09:51,808
Hey, hey, uh, hold my calls
'til Monday, okay?
210
00:09:51,982 --> 00:09:53,505
Out of office,
automatic reply.
211
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,464
Go and get an early start
on the weekend, all right?
212
00:09:56,073 --> 00:09:58,772
[chuckling] Right, yeah.
It's five o'clock somewhere.
213
00:09:58,946 --> 00:10:01,339
Exactly. All right. Yeah. bye.
214
00:10:03,907 --> 00:10:05,779
That's the problem
with hiring a super competent,
215
00:10:05,953 --> 00:10:07,215
super intelligent assistant.
216
00:10:07,389 --> 00:10:09,043
They actually try
to get you to do work.
217
00:10:09,217 --> 00:10:10,479
I would like an assistant.
218
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:11,741
[Calvin]
Take one of mine. I have three,
219
00:10:11,915 --> 00:10:13,264
but she's like my main one.
220
00:10:13,438 --> 00:10:14,962
The other two just
handle market reports.
221
00:10:15,136 --> 00:10:16,224
Am I coming
across as a complete
222
00:10:16,398 --> 00:10:17,921
and total asshole right now?
223
00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:20,271
Just partial. Maybe
like one third of an asshole.
224
00:10:20,445 --> 00:10:21,838
[Calvin]
A partially obstructed rectum.
225
00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:23,927
Fair enough, that's fair.
226
00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:28,758
Well, I should let you,
um-- I'll come back later.
227
00:10:28,932 --> 00:10:32,196
[Calvin] No rush. I'm not, like,
kicking you out. You want to--
228
00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:33,807
Can I get you some coffee?
229
00:10:34,416 --> 00:10:35,460
I'll always take a coffee.
230
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,245
[Calvin]
Can't vouch for the--
231
00:10:37,419 --> 00:10:39,073
This might not be
third wave coffee right here.
232
00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:41,858
I'm not a coffee snob.
I just want it in my mouth.
233
00:10:42,032 --> 00:10:43,381
[Calvin]
Uh huh.
234
00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:44,992
[Rachel] I was at
the airport at, like, 6 AM
235
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:46,471
- [Calvin] You're based in...
- [Rachel] Phoenix.
236
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:48,517
[Calvin]
Phoenix. Nice. That sounds--
237
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:49,823
I'm picturing sun.
238
00:10:49,997 --> 00:10:51,694
[Rachel]
Sun is an understatement.
239
00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:53,174
- [Calvin] Uh-huh.
- [Rachel] Inferno would be
240
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:55,219
more accurate, 112 degrees.
241
00:10:55,393 --> 00:10:58,005
Dry heat, though, right?
Isn't it dry?
242
00:10:58,788 --> 00:11:02,009
It's hell on earth.
It's brushfires. It's flames.
243
00:11:02,183 --> 00:11:03,924
You'll be, like, literally
driving and you'll see, like,
244
00:11:04,098 --> 00:11:05,708
smoke coming off, uh--
Thank you.
245
00:11:05,882 --> 00:11:07,231
Smoke coming off the asphalt.
246
00:11:07,405 --> 00:11:08,711
[Calvin] Oh, I guess
you won't be working for
247
00:11:08,885 --> 00:11:10,670
the Phoenix Board
of Tourism anytime soon.
248
00:11:11,279 --> 00:11:12,802
- What brought you out there?
- [Rachel] Work.
249
00:11:12,976 --> 00:11:15,544
Work. Cool. What do you--
What's your line of, uh...
250
00:11:15,718 --> 00:11:16,980
Oh, pharmaceuticals.
251
00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:19,548
[Calvin] Pharmaceuticals.
Excellent. Sweet.
252
00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:21,855
Hope you brought some
with you. Just kidding.
253
00:11:22,029 --> 00:11:23,291
[Rachel]
You're a kidder.
254
00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:24,727
Kidding aside,
college reunion.
255
00:11:24,901 --> 00:11:26,337
I'm sure you
could move some units.
256
00:11:26,816 --> 00:11:29,253
Erectile dysfunction pills
would probably be at a premium.
257
00:11:29,427 --> 00:11:31,038
[Calvin]
Oh, you could make a killing.
258
00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:32,517
Should I set up shop?
259
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,171
Start dealing drugs
to all the alumni?
260
00:11:34,345 --> 00:11:35,607
[Calvin] Amphetamines
would go like gangbusters.
261
00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:37,566
- Anti-anxiety--
- Do you have anxiety?
262
00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:42,223
Oh, no. I didn't mean me.
263
00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:44,704
Pretty even keeled
and not, uh--
264
00:11:45,226 --> 00:11:46,706
[Rachel]
You never feel anxious?
265
00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:49,273
A feeling of foreboding,
impending doom. [giggling]
266
00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:51,754
[Calvin] I mean, the stock
market makes me nervous,
267
00:11:51,928 --> 00:11:53,843
but you won't find me
popping pills about it.
268
00:11:54,017 --> 00:11:55,584
Not that there's
anything wrong with, uh--
269
00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:57,020
With what?
270
00:11:57,194 --> 00:11:59,022
[Calvin]
With drugs, prescription drugs.
271
00:11:59,196 --> 00:12:01,764
The pharmaceutical
industry writ large.
272
00:12:01,938 --> 00:12:03,418
- I wasn't disparaging your--
- [Rachel] My industry.
273
00:12:03,592 --> 00:12:06,247
Your industry is
above reproach in my book.
274
00:12:06,421 --> 00:12:07,335
[Rachel]
Your industry being?
275
00:12:07,509 --> 00:12:09,250
Finance. [chuckling]
276
00:12:09,424 --> 00:12:10,991
Yes, I'm in finance.
277
00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:13,645
I sell financial
instruments for the, uh--
278
00:12:14,255 --> 00:12:16,387
I mean, it's private equity,
but before you throw up,
279
00:12:16,561 --> 00:12:20,087
what's cool is we invest
exclusively in clean energy.
280
00:12:20,261 --> 00:12:24,656
Green tech, wind, renewables,
you know, solar,
281
00:12:24,831 --> 00:12:26,571
and we were the first to lead
282
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,269
the charge in divesting our
mutual funds of any blue chip
283
00:12:28,312 --> 00:12:29,749
that isn't carbon neutral.
284
00:12:29,923 --> 00:12:32,882
We believe sustainability
equals profitability.
285
00:12:33,056 --> 00:12:35,493
Well, look at you
living your best life,
286
00:12:35,667 --> 00:12:39,671
fighting the good fight, uh,
reducing your carbon footprint,
287
00:12:39,846 --> 00:12:41,412
and making a shit ton of money?
288
00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,066
I bet the school roped
you into fund raising, huh?
289
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:45,373
[Calvin]
The university asked me to--
290
00:12:45,547 --> 00:12:47,462
The-- the-- My buddy, Mike,
actually, asked me to join
291
00:12:47,636 --> 00:12:49,159
the alumni association,
292
00:12:49,333 --> 00:12:50,770
and the alumni Association
puts on these events,
293
00:12:50,944 --> 00:12:52,510
this event, and so, yeah,
294
00:12:52,684 --> 00:12:53,990
this is what you get
for getting here super early,
295
00:12:54,034 --> 00:12:55,470
you get to set up
folding tables.
296
00:12:55,644 --> 00:12:57,037
Ugh. Folding tables suck!
297
00:12:57,211 --> 00:12:59,256
- [Calvin] They totally suck.
- Manual labor?
298
00:12:59,430 --> 00:13:01,650
So, I'm just going
to be a bad volunteer
299
00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:03,957
and abdicate my folding
table responsibilities.
300
00:13:04,131 --> 00:13:06,437
Do not take responsibility.
What's the worst they can do?
301
00:13:06,611 --> 00:13:08,004
Put you in jail?
The penitentiary
302
00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:09,397
for people who
fail to fold tables?
303
00:13:09,571 --> 00:13:12,226
[chuckling]
Huh, that's weird.
304
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,705
[Rachel?
What's weird?
305
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,490
I can't seem to
find your name in the--
306
00:13:15,664 --> 00:13:17,013
You're not in the master list
for the registration.
307
00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,189
- Did you RSVP?
- Oh, I did.
308
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:21,452
I mean,
at least I think I did. Hmm.
309
00:13:21,626 --> 00:13:23,367
[Calvin]
I don't know why I can't--
310
00:13:23,541 --> 00:13:25,587
It's not under your last name.
Did you change your last name?
311
00:13:25,761 --> 00:13:26,980
Why would I change my name?
312
00:13:27,154 --> 00:13:28,068
[Calvin]
Did you get-- Are you married?
313
00:13:28,242 --> 00:13:29,939
- No.
- Huh.
314
00:13:30,113 --> 00:13:33,073
I don't know
why I can't, uh, maybe--
315
00:13:33,247 --> 00:13:35,815
I'm sure it's just clerical,
or you know what?
316
00:13:36,424 --> 00:13:38,382
I bet you RSVPed late
and they didn't add it to the--
317
00:13:38,556 --> 00:13:39,819
[whispering]
You might have to sneak me in.
318
00:13:39,993 --> 00:13:41,951
You might have
to crash the party.
319
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:43,997
I won't tell if you won't.
320
00:13:44,171 --> 00:13:46,869
It'll be our dirty
little secret. [chuckling]
321
00:13:49,002 --> 00:13:52,135
Well, um,
have fun at the big boy table.
322
00:13:52,309 --> 00:13:53,789
Try not to do any keg stands.
323
00:13:53,963 --> 00:13:55,704
[Calvin]
No keg stands in the forecast.
324
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:59,142
Besides, it wasn't the econ
majors who partied like, uh...
325
00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,666
It was the theater majors
who were party animals.
326
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:04,104
[Rachel]
Oh, theater majors, huh?
327
00:14:04,278 --> 00:14:05,453
Going to
a theater department party
328
00:14:05,627 --> 00:14:07,150
was like going to a brothel.
329
00:14:07,324 --> 00:14:08,978
[Rachel] Oh, my God.
Brothel's a bit hyperbolic.
330
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:11,372
People were hooking up
left and right. Guys and girls,
331
00:14:11,546 --> 00:14:13,156
guys and guys, girls and girls.
332
00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:16,246
You know, somebody
was passing around ecstasy.
333
00:14:16,420 --> 00:14:17,900
Everybody was
singing show tunes.
334
00:14:18,074 --> 00:14:20,642
The show tunes
I can vouch for.
335
00:14:20,816 --> 00:14:23,340
[Calvin] I was like a fish
out of, uh-- I mean,
336
00:14:23,514 --> 00:14:25,429
all these theater people
were just looking at me like,
337
00:14:25,603 --> 00:14:27,649
"Who invited
Mr. Uptight over here?"
338
00:14:27,823 --> 00:14:29,651
"Mr. I'm Studying Economics."
339
00:14:29,825 --> 00:14:32,132
It was like performance art
making you go to those parties.
340
00:14:32,306 --> 00:14:34,569
No, no. You were always
341
00:14:34,743 --> 00:14:35,831
trying to get me into trouble.
342
00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:37,789
Trouble is my middle name...
343
00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:39,182
legally.
344
00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:40,792
It's on my birth certificate.
345
00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:42,272
Besides, guys like you
always have
346
00:14:42,446 --> 00:14:43,795
a way of getting
out of trouble.
347
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:45,145
Does a guy like me typically
348
00:14:45,319 --> 00:14:46,842
take a women's studies class?
349
00:14:47,016 --> 00:14:48,713
[Rachel] You were
the only guy in that class.
350
00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:49,845
Guys can be feminists.
351
00:14:50,019 --> 00:14:50,977
And girls can be goalies
352
00:14:51,151 --> 00:14:52,108
in the National Hockey League.
353
00:14:52,282 --> 00:14:53,718
You made me a feminist.
354
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,764
You converted me after class
355
00:14:55,938 --> 00:14:57,461
at that shitty coffee shop,
356
00:14:57,635 --> 00:14:58,854
with that shitty coffee.
357
00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,073
[Rachel]
Tuesdays and Thursdays.
358
00:15:00,247 --> 00:15:02,292
Tuesdays and Thursdays.
359
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:08,342
Our little debate society.
Our little weekly dialectic.
360
00:15:08,516 --> 00:15:09,778
I would school you.
361
00:15:09,952 --> 00:15:10,953
[Calvin] I got schooled.
362
00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:12,476
Yes. Let me see.
363
00:15:12,650 --> 00:15:14,000
Intersectionality,
364
00:15:14,174 --> 00:15:16,219
feminist epistemology,
queer theory.
365
00:15:16,393 --> 00:15:17,917
You gave as good as you got.
366
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:19,831
You got me to read
The Road to Serfdom.
367
00:15:19,875 --> 00:15:21,703
You got me to read
The Second Sex.
368
00:15:21,877 --> 00:15:23,574
I mean, you really opened
my eyes to--
369
00:15:23,748 --> 00:15:27,491
You made me perfectly
aware of my own heteronormative,
370
00:15:27,665 --> 00:15:29,493
cisgendered,
white male privilege,
371
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:30,930
and the certain pitfalls,
372
00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:32,409
the certain
trappings that accompany--
373
00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,063
White male privilege.
374
00:15:34,237 --> 00:15:35,630
[Calvin] It bears repeating,
and you were right.
375
00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:36,848
Like, we all bring
our own bias, you know,
376
00:15:36,892 --> 00:15:37,806
our own upbringing to bear
377
00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:39,155
- on the way we perceive,
- Uh-huh.
378
00:15:39,329 --> 00:15:40,243
[Calvin]
or think we perceive events.
379
00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:41,679
There's no objective truth,
380
00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:43,377
there's no--
What did you call that?
381
00:15:43,551 --> 00:15:48,773
You had, like, an actual
philosophic moniker that I'm--
382
00:15:49,296 --> 00:15:50,688
The Archimedean point.
383
00:15:50,862 --> 00:15:52,864
[Calvin] There's no
Archimedean point, right.
384
00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:54,779
[Calvin] There is
no theoretically neutral
385
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:57,826
vantage point because nobody,
and I mean nobody, is neutral.
386
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,523
Gender studies.
387
00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:02,483
Remember that-- We got into
that big fight about
388
00:16:02,657 --> 00:16:04,180
the male and female brain.
389
00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:05,921
[Rachel] It was less
of a fight and more of a war.
390
00:16:06,095 --> 00:16:07,749
Charles Murray aside,
391
00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:09,316
the idea that there are
differences between different
392
00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:11,057
brains and different
groups of people,
393
00:16:11,231 --> 00:16:13,581
even within the same
group of people, across race,
394
00:16:13,755 --> 00:16:16,192
across nationality,
across, yes, gender,
395
00:16:16,366 --> 00:16:17,933
No!
[chuckling]
396
00:16:18,107 --> 00:16:19,456
[Calvin] It is in fact
scientifically indisputable.
397
00:16:19,630 --> 00:16:21,328
Okay, I would dispute that.
398
00:16:21,502 --> 00:16:23,069
[Calvin] The brains in men
and the brains in women are not
399
00:16:23,243 --> 00:16:25,506
the same brains
from a-- from a biological--
400
00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:27,247
From the standpoint
of cortisol levels,
401
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:29,901
adrenal response,
impulse control,
402
00:16:30,076 --> 00:16:31,555
the whole
prefrontal cortex is--
403
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:33,122
[Rachel]
Now you're just making shit up.
404
00:16:33,296 --> 00:16:36,169
But women's brains are better.
They just are.
405
00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:37,997
Just look at history.
History is-- What is it?
406
00:16:38,171 --> 00:16:41,130
It's-- it's genocide and famine
and mass destruction.
407
00:16:41,304 --> 00:16:44,568
It's war. Why?
Because it's men.
408
00:16:44,742 --> 00:16:46,527
That's how our brains work.
409
00:16:46,701 --> 00:16:48,311
You don't think men
and women think differently?
410
00:16:48,485 --> 00:16:50,966
Let women rule the world,
seriously.
411
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:53,447
Let women be in charge.
Every country, every continent.
412
00:16:53,621 --> 00:16:55,492
Boom! World peace.
World's a better place.
413
00:16:55,666 --> 00:16:59,018
In what world are you-- Mm...
you are either deliberately,
414
00:16:59,192 --> 00:17:02,673
or ignorantly, omitting
thousands of year-- [sighing]
415
00:17:02,847 --> 00:17:04,153
Women are
equally capable of, um--
416
00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:06,286
[Calvin] Violence?
Yes, everyone's capable--
417
00:17:06,460 --> 00:17:09,593
Greek mythology,
Greek tragedy. Okay?
418
00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:11,378
There are plenty
of examples of women doing
419
00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:14,772
some pretty brutal,
some pretty fucked up shit.
420
00:17:14,946 --> 00:17:16,339
[Calvin]
By and large--
421
00:17:16,513 --> 00:17:18,341
The women of Lemnos
decapitate their husbands
422
00:17:18,515 --> 00:17:22,041
for sleeping with their slaves.
Clytemnestra killed Agamemnon.
423
00:17:22,215 --> 00:17:25,261
Medea. She kills her own kids,
for Christ's sake.
424
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:30,092
Oh, what was that play?
I saw you in, in school.
425
00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:31,833
[Rachel]
You saw a few of my--
426
00:17:32,007 --> 00:17:35,010
Not the weird stuff, not
all the weird off campus, uh--
427
00:17:35,184 --> 00:17:36,925
- [Rachel] Performance art.
- Not the performance art.
428
00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:39,275
That was very political,
very confusing.
429
00:17:39,449 --> 00:17:41,234
[Rachel] I didn't
spoon feed the audience.
430
00:17:41,408 --> 00:17:43,323
What was the play? You were
acting in that-- You were doing
431
00:17:43,497 --> 00:17:46,456
that play and the--
Like, the Greek play.
432
00:17:46,630 --> 00:17:48,067
You were acting in
that play with the goats--
433
00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:50,069
Euripides! The Cyclops.
434
00:17:50,243 --> 00:17:51,766
[Calvin]
Euripides, right.
435
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:53,420
It was not about goats.
436
00:17:53,594 --> 00:17:55,161
[Calvin]
Goats were involved.
437
00:17:55,335 --> 00:17:57,293
I just remember, I had never
seen a Greek play before,
438
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:59,382
and it was like, "Wow,"
it was, like, intense.
439
00:17:59,556 --> 00:18:01,123
It was an immersive production.
440
00:18:01,297 --> 00:18:04,126
It was in-your-face, kind
of cross-dressing type of--
441
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,433
I just remember you were
wearing that--
442
00:18:06,607 --> 00:18:10,785
You had like a large, uh,
phallic type of, uh...
443
00:18:10,959 --> 00:18:12,656
- [Rachel] A phallus?
- [scoffing] Yes.
444
00:18:12,830 --> 00:18:14,180
You had a phallus
strapped around your--
445
00:18:14,354 --> 00:18:17,139
You're right. Yeah.
I was wearing a strap-on,
446
00:18:17,313 --> 00:18:20,969
a very large,
bulging, prehistoric hard on.
447
00:18:21,143 --> 00:18:22,797
- It was very intimidating.
- [Rachel] Mhm, yeah.
448
00:18:22,971 --> 00:18:24,146
But, you were good.
449
00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:27,802
Your performance was very,
uh-- You played the goat.
450
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:30,152
I played the satyr.
451
00:18:30,326 --> 00:18:31,980
Satyr, right.
452
00:18:32,154 --> 00:18:34,374
Yeah. Satyrs are technically
only half goat.
453
00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:36,027
Half goat, half man.
454
00:18:36,202 --> 00:18:38,029
The drunken fawns
of the forest,
455
00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:41,120
registered sex offenders
of the Greco-Roman era.
456
00:18:41,294 --> 00:18:42,730
They worship Dionysus,
457
00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:45,167
the God of binge
drinking and gangbangs.
458
00:18:45,341 --> 00:18:46,690
[Calvin]
For a student production,
459
00:18:46,864 --> 00:18:48,257
it was a pretty
realistic looking orgy.
460
00:18:48,431 --> 00:18:50,216
Oh, it was a Bacchanal,
thank you very much.
461
00:18:50,390 --> 00:18:51,913
And I remember you had on that,
462
00:18:52,087 --> 00:18:56,091
like, that mask thing?
Your character was wearing
463
00:18:56,265 --> 00:18:59,616
that, like, weird looking goat
mask with, like, the horns.
464
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:02,358
I made that mask myself.
Papier maché.
465
00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:03,925
I still have it, actually.
466
00:19:04,099 --> 00:19:05,187
[Calvin] Does the goat mask
come in handy?
467
00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:06,493
You'd be surprised.
468
00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:08,756
Do you dress up like
livestock for Halloween?
469
00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:12,586
[laughing] I, uh, I break
it out for special occasions.
470
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:14,065
- [Calvin] Special occasions?
- Intimate moments.
471
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:15,241
[Calvin]
Intimate moments.
472
00:19:15,415 --> 00:19:18,157
Moments of the intimate variety.
473
00:19:18,331 --> 00:19:19,549
[Calvin] I find
that kind of disturbing.
474
00:19:19,723 --> 00:19:20,942
I find it kind of kinky.
475
00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:27,383
I'm a married man.
Kinky is not really, uh--
476
00:19:27,557 --> 00:19:29,211
Uh, you were never particularly,
477
00:19:29,385 --> 00:19:30,995
- No, no.
- uh, yeah back in the day--
478
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:33,389
- Well, you, on the other hand--
- Was I kinky in college?
479
00:19:33,563 --> 00:19:34,999
Well, I mean, kinky's--
Kinky sounds kind of, uh--
480
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,958
Pejorative, diminutive?
481
00:19:37,132 --> 00:19:39,526
I mean, it's not like, uh,
it's not a negative quality.
482
00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:41,092
- It's not a character flaw.
- Would you describe me,
483
00:19:41,267 --> 00:19:42,616
as if someone
asked you what I was like.
484
00:19:42,790 --> 00:19:44,226
Would you be like,
"Oh, Rachel Lerner. Yeah.
485
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,315
- She was kind of kinky."
- No, um, of course not.
486
00:19:46,489 --> 00:19:47,969
No. That's not the first word
that comes to mind.
487
00:19:48,143 --> 00:19:49,449
But, it's like the third
488
00:19:49,623 --> 00:19:51,190
or fourth word
that comes to mind?
489
00:19:51,364 --> 00:19:53,017
No, no, no. What I meant--
What I'm saying is what
490
00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:56,238
I meant to say is,
compared to me back in the day,
491
00:19:56,412 --> 00:19:59,589
compared to my, um, very, uh,
492
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,069
limited, very pathetic
493
00:20:01,243 --> 00:20:03,245
- lack of uh, experience,
- Mm-hm.
494
00:20:03,419 --> 00:20:04,725
- I was just a little less,
- Uh-huh.
495
00:20:04,899 --> 00:20:06,509
- and I'm just a little more--
- Kinky.
496
00:20:06,683 --> 00:20:08,294
Experienced.
You had more experiences.
497
00:20:08,468 --> 00:20:09,730
Right, I slept around more.
498
00:20:09,904 --> 00:20:12,559
Well, uh, numbers wise.
499
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:15,301
[both laughing]
500
00:20:15,475 --> 00:20:16,432
If we're just
comparing numbers.
501
00:20:16,606 --> 00:20:17,564
I slept with more people
502
00:20:17,738 --> 00:20:19,435
From a numbers standpoint.
503
00:20:20,044 --> 00:20:21,524
Yes, I was pretty...
504
00:20:21,698 --> 00:20:23,047
- Inexperienced.
- Inexperienced.
505
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:24,614
No fellatio during
freshman orientation?
506
00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:26,007
- No, no.
- No hand jobs
507
00:20:26,181 --> 00:20:27,226
- in your sophomore dorm room?
- No.
508
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:28,966
No sorority girls
your senior year?
509
00:20:29,140 --> 00:20:31,230
- No, no.
- You didn't sleep around?
510
00:20:31,795 --> 00:20:33,710
I only slept with
one person in college.
511
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:36,147
You know I only slept
with one person in college.
512
00:20:37,845 --> 00:20:39,107
Even after we broke up?
513
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:41,370
Even after we broke up.
514
00:20:51,685 --> 00:20:56,733
Well, I, uh, hate to break
up the pre-reunion reunion,
515
00:20:56,907 --> 00:20:58,909
- but I should probably, uh--
- Totally.
516
00:20:59,083 --> 00:21:00,346
You know,
keep setting up some stuff.
517
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:01,912
Definitely.
518
00:21:02,086 --> 00:21:05,873
But, I'll definitely
see you later at the, uh,
519
00:21:05,916 --> 00:21:09,006
I mean, obviously we'll meet
up mañana, at the shindig.
520
00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:10,530
[Rachel]
Shindig, indeed.
521
00:21:10,704 --> 00:21:12,271
The etymology
of shindig, but also the--
522
00:21:12,445 --> 00:21:14,621
- Lots of catching up to do.
- Lots to catch up on.
523
00:21:14,795 --> 00:21:16,318
[Rachel] I'll catch you
before you leave.
524
00:21:16,492 --> 00:21:19,713
Please do. Don't be, uh,
don't be a stranger. Don't--
525
00:21:19,887 --> 00:21:21,497
don't get lost in the shuffle.
526
00:21:21,671 --> 00:21:23,282
[Rachel] Don't worry, you can't
get rid of me that easy.
527
00:21:23,456 --> 00:21:25,022
If you can't find me,
528
00:21:25,196 --> 00:21:27,982
we can always, um, rendezvous
at the bar. After the...
529
00:21:28,635 --> 00:21:32,639
[Calvin] Rendezvous? Yes, at
the bar. the bar in the hotel.
530
00:21:32,813 --> 00:21:35,337
- [Rachel] Hotel bar.
- Hotel bar. After--
531
00:21:35,511 --> 00:21:38,209
Or before. You know, the hotel
bar does have a hell of
532
00:21:38,384 --> 00:21:40,995
a happy hour. I think
I'm going to go pre-game it.
533
00:21:41,169 --> 00:21:42,475
[Calvin]
Pregame that shit.
534
00:21:43,954 --> 00:21:45,086
Care to join?
535
00:21:46,043 --> 00:21:47,262
[chuckling]
536
00:21:47,871 --> 00:21:50,526
Join the parade, huh?
You want me to join you?
537
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:52,876
[Rachel] You want
to do some day drinking?
538
00:21:56,576 --> 00:21:59,361
See? You're always
trying to get me into trouble.
539
00:22:00,797 --> 00:22:02,016
Trouble is my middle name.
540
00:22:07,761 --> 00:22:10,546
[tense piano notes]
541
00:22:34,396 --> 00:22:36,703
[Calvin] What should we toast
to? To MSE for providing us
542
00:22:36,877 --> 00:22:39,662
a completely unremarkable
undergraduate education?
543
00:22:39,836 --> 00:22:43,100
I know.
Let's drink to our youth.
544
00:22:43,274 --> 00:22:45,929
[Rachel]
Mm. To the one that got away.
545
00:22:46,103 --> 00:22:47,888
[Calvin] Hey [groaning].
546
00:22:48,062 --> 00:22:49,455
- [Calvin] I fucked it up.
- [Rachel] Yeah.
547
00:22:49,629 --> 00:22:52,675
You're right.
I was... too needy.
548
00:22:52,849 --> 00:22:54,329
Girls don't like needy guys.
549
00:22:54,503 --> 00:22:55,896
You can't just drop
the "I love you" bomb
550
00:22:56,070 --> 00:22:57,811
on somebody
six months into dating.
551
00:22:57,985 --> 00:23:00,857
We dated for, like,
one semester, and I'm, like,
552
00:23:01,728 --> 00:23:02,990
professing my whatever,
553
00:23:03,164 --> 00:23:05,079
and expecting you
to reciprocate when you--
554
00:23:05,253 --> 00:23:08,038
I mean, you were
clearly expecting this to be
555
00:23:08,212 --> 00:23:12,391
a more casual,
uh, less serious,
556
00:23:12,565 --> 00:23:15,002
less exclusive relationship.
557
00:23:15,176 --> 00:23:18,092
I mean, you saw
other people before me,
558
00:23:18,266 --> 00:23:19,833
like, a lot of other people.
559
00:23:20,007 --> 00:23:21,400
[Rachel] Like, I was fucking
the whole lacrosse team?
560
00:23:21,574 --> 00:23:23,184
A person in your position--
Let's admit it,
561
00:23:23,358 --> 00:23:24,707
a girl like you
could've done way better than
562
00:23:24,881 --> 00:23:27,884
a guy like me.
Like, so much better.
563
00:23:28,798 --> 00:23:33,847
Talk about a snooze fest. Not
exactly the, uh, life of the--
564
00:23:34,935 --> 00:23:36,806
I'm like Captain Boring.
565
00:23:36,980 --> 00:23:38,678
My wife will be the first
person to tell you that.
566
00:23:38,852 --> 00:23:39,853
Did you tell
your wife about me?
567
00:23:40,027 --> 00:23:41,420
Did I tell my wife
568
00:23:41,594 --> 00:23:43,683
about my only
serious college girlfriend?
569
00:23:43,857 --> 00:23:47,600
The girl who
broke my heart? Uh... no.
570
00:23:48,470 --> 00:23:49,689
Didn't exactly come up in
casual conversation
571
00:23:49,863 --> 00:23:50,907
- around the, uh--
- You should tell her.
572
00:23:51,081 --> 00:23:52,692
Tell her what?
573
00:23:52,866 --> 00:23:56,391
That you're not just some
old flame? That maybe, secretly,
574
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:59,960
deep down, if I'm--
If I'm being honest with myself
575
00:24:00,134 --> 00:24:02,963
in all probability, I still
haven't gotten over you?
576
00:24:03,964 --> 00:24:05,139
[chuckling nervously]
577
00:24:05,313 --> 00:24:06,880
You've gotten
on with your life.
578
00:24:07,054 --> 00:24:09,709
Your life looks
pretty sweet to me.
579
00:24:09,883 --> 00:24:11,972
You're a big,
successful businessman,
580
00:24:12,146 --> 00:24:13,887
a partner at Scorch Capital.
581
00:24:14,061 --> 00:24:15,976
Beautiful wife,
two little girls.
582
00:24:16,150 --> 00:24:19,109
Uh-- uh, did I tell
you I have girls?
583
00:24:19,719 --> 00:24:20,807
- You did.
- Huh.
584
00:24:22,199 --> 00:24:23,374
Um, at least
I'm pretty sure you did.
585
00:24:23,549 --> 00:24:24,811
You said Sara's home with
586
00:24:24,985 --> 00:24:26,900
the girls to go
to the soccer game.
587
00:24:27,074 --> 00:24:28,467
- Sara?
- Mhm.
588
00:24:28,641 --> 00:24:30,164
See, the alcohol's
going right to my head,
589
00:24:30,338 --> 00:24:31,948
because I don't remember
telling you my wife's name,
590
00:24:32,122 --> 00:24:33,950
and I definitely don't remember
telling you where I work.
591
00:24:34,124 --> 00:24:35,865
Uh, you told me
you were in finance,
592
00:24:36,039 --> 00:24:37,824
you humblebragged
about your IPOs, you...
593
00:24:37,998 --> 00:24:39,826
Did I mention Scorch Capital?
That I work at Scorch Capital?
594
00:24:43,220 --> 00:24:46,180
[laughing pathetically]
595
00:24:46,354 --> 00:24:48,399
Woo! Uh, online.
596
00:24:48,574 --> 00:24:49,618
What?
597
00:24:50,967 --> 00:24:52,491
God, this is embarrassing.
598
00:24:53,274 --> 00:24:55,058
I'm totally embarrassed.
599
00:24:55,232 --> 00:24:57,931
This is totally going to sound
like I'm some kind of stalker.
600
00:24:58,105 --> 00:24:59,846
I'm totally honored.
601
00:25:00,020 --> 00:25:01,848
I always thought I was way
too lame to be stalked.
602
00:25:02,022 --> 00:25:03,893
Okay, maybe stalking isn't the
right-- Let's just call it--
603
00:25:04,067 --> 00:25:05,373
I was seeing
what you were up to.
604
00:25:05,547 --> 00:25:06,896
[Calvin] You were
seeing when I was up to.
605
00:25:07,070 --> 00:25:08,071
Not creepy in the least.
606
00:25:08,245 --> 00:25:09,203
Not a modicum of creepiness,
607
00:25:09,377 --> 00:25:10,900
and I happened to come across--
608
00:25:11,074 --> 00:25:12,859
I happened to, incidentally,
see some pictures--
609
00:25:13,033 --> 00:25:14,556
[Calvin] Pictures.
610
00:25:14,730 --> 00:25:17,124
Pictures you posted
on social media, your house
611
00:25:17,298 --> 00:25:20,040
or not so much of a house,
more of a McMansion.
612
00:25:20,214 --> 00:25:21,955
- [Calvin] It's not a mansion.
- Oh, it's so totally a mansion.
613
00:25:22,129 --> 00:25:24,218
[baby voice]
Mr. Fancy Pants has a mansion.
614
00:25:24,392 --> 00:25:26,002
[Calvin] I have other
redeeming qualities.
615
00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:27,613
You post a lot
of pictures of cars,
616
00:25:27,787 --> 00:25:29,353
all these fancy pants
sports cars.
617
00:25:29,528 --> 00:25:31,268
[Calvin] I have one kind
of rare sports car,
618
00:25:31,442 --> 00:25:32,618
the rest are just
to fool around in.
619
00:25:32,792 --> 00:25:34,141
Your kids are just--
620
00:25:34,315 --> 00:25:36,622
Look at these kids.
Talk about adorable.
621
00:25:36,796 --> 00:25:37,971
[softly] Thanks.
622
00:25:38,145 --> 00:25:39,973
You post
the most adorable pictures.
623
00:25:40,147 --> 00:25:42,105
I like the ones where
their faces are like cat faces.
624
00:25:42,279 --> 00:25:44,673
Oh, yeah,
it's like this... filter thingy.
625
00:25:44,847 --> 00:25:46,545
How old are they?
Brianna and Kaleigh?
626
00:25:46,719 --> 00:25:48,372
Six and three.
627
00:25:48,547 --> 00:25:49,852
[Rachel] Six and three,
you must have your hands full.
628
00:25:49,896 --> 00:25:51,114
We hired this au pair,
629
00:25:51,288 --> 00:25:53,334
this 19-year-old
au pair from Belarus,
630
00:25:53,508 --> 00:25:56,380
and you should see the clothes
she tries to buy my girls.
631
00:25:56,555 --> 00:25:59,558
I'm like, "I don't know
how they do things in Belarus,
632
00:25:59,732 --> 00:26:01,516
"but my six-year-old
does not need booty shorts.
633
00:26:01,690 --> 00:26:02,691
Thank you very much."
634
00:26:02,865 --> 00:26:03,866
What does your wife have to say
635
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:05,215
about your modesty dress code?
636
00:26:05,389 --> 00:26:06,477
You make--
You make it sound like
637
00:26:06,652 --> 00:26:07,957
I'm Amish,
or Quaker, or some shit.
638
00:26:08,131 --> 00:26:09,393
[Rachel] Your wife doesn't
dress, hmm--
639
00:26:10,133 --> 00:26:12,396
Her outfits aren't
exactly conservative on--
640
00:26:12,571 --> 00:26:13,963
in her selfies.
641
00:26:14,137 --> 00:26:15,748
You've been checking
out my wife's selfies?
642
00:26:15,922 --> 00:26:17,358
- [Rachel] Uh, are they real?
- What?
643
00:26:17,532 --> 00:26:19,012
Her boobs.
644
00:26:19,186 --> 00:26:21,362
They're real expensive.
645
00:26:21,536 --> 00:26:24,757
[laughing] The au pair from
Belarus handles the child care.
646
00:26:24,931 --> 00:26:27,847
So does Sara, like, have a job?
647
00:26:28,021 --> 00:26:29,762
She has interests. Yes.
648
00:26:29,936 --> 00:26:31,328
Crossfit?
649
00:26:31,502 --> 00:26:33,374
She volunteers with
a lot of non for profits.
650
00:26:33,548 --> 00:26:34,897
Save the whales!
651
00:26:35,071 --> 00:26:37,073
Charities, charity work,
poverty initiatives,
652
00:26:37,247 --> 00:26:39,641
climate initiatives.
She does these petitions,
653
00:26:39,815 --> 00:26:43,253
she petitions people to
retrofit inner city parks into
654
00:26:43,427 --> 00:26:46,213
green spaces. She counsels
women at the women's shelter.
655
00:26:46,387 --> 00:26:47,649
Like, abused women?
656
00:26:47,823 --> 00:26:49,303
Victimized women.
Women who've been abused.
657
00:26:49,477 --> 00:26:51,392
Wow. What an amazing woman,
your wife.
658
00:26:51,566 --> 00:26:53,873
Fighting the good fight,
speaking truth to power.
659
00:26:54,047 --> 00:26:55,222
Why does it sound like you...
660
00:26:55,396 --> 00:26:57,659
sound kind
of sarcastic about it?
661
00:26:57,833 --> 00:26:59,574
'Cause, you know,
Sara's actually I mean,
662
00:26:59,748 --> 00:27:01,228
she's uh, quite the--
663
00:27:01,402 --> 00:27:03,273
She's an amazing role model
for the girls.
664
00:27:03,447 --> 00:27:05,754
I mean,
talk about strong will,
665
00:27:05,928 --> 00:27:07,451
- talk about independent.
- [Rachel] Mm-hm.
666
00:27:07,626 --> 00:27:09,366
Sarah is
the head of that household,
667
00:27:09,540 --> 00:27:12,631
I'll tell you what, she does
not put up with any of my shit.
668
00:27:12,805 --> 00:27:14,415
[Calvin]
Ooh, what shit?
669
00:27:14,589 --> 00:27:17,113
Ah, well, you know,
just the typical male bullshit,
670
00:27:17,940 --> 00:27:19,550
typical gender roles.
671
00:27:19,725 --> 00:27:22,945
I mean, yeah, I work
crazy hours, like insane hours,
672
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,295
but I don't come home like,
"Honey, where's dinner?"
673
00:27:25,469 --> 00:27:26,427
Doesn't the au pair make dinner?
674
00:27:26,601 --> 00:27:27,689
I make dinner.
675
00:27:29,082 --> 00:27:30,823
- When I can.
- [Rachel scoffing]
676
00:27:30,997 --> 00:27:35,436
I fold the laundry, I make the
snacks for, uh, soccer practice.
677
00:27:35,610 --> 00:27:36,655
Progressive.
678
00:27:36,829 --> 00:27:39,005
My point is-- my point is
679
00:27:39,179 --> 00:27:41,355
I'm the first guy my little
girls get to know, right?
680
00:27:41,529 --> 00:27:43,270
So, if I set the right example,
681
00:27:43,444 --> 00:27:45,098
hopefully I'll set them on a
course that steers clear of...
682
00:27:45,272 --> 00:27:46,621
- scumbags.
- Don't forget about douchebags.
683
00:27:46,795 --> 00:27:48,710
Scumbags and douchebags
abound in finance.
684
00:27:48,884 --> 00:27:50,669
Half the hedge fund guys are
having affairs with women
685
00:27:50,843 --> 00:27:52,758
half their age. In my office,
you would not believe
686
00:27:52,932 --> 00:27:54,585
the way some
of these men talk about women.
687
00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:57,719
It's actually unconscionable.
688
00:27:57,893 --> 00:27:59,808
I've caught guys looking at
porn at their terminals, like--
689
00:27:59,982 --> 00:28:01,462
Like, full screen porn.
690
00:28:01,636 --> 00:28:03,377
They don't even
minimize the screens.
691
00:28:03,551 --> 00:28:04,726
[Rachel]
You don't watch porn?
692
00:28:05,422 --> 00:28:07,381
Not at work.
I'm not a porn guy in general.
693
00:28:07,555 --> 00:28:08,904
[Rachel] Oh, come on,
every guy's a porn guy.
694
00:28:09,078 --> 00:28:10,950
It just never did it for me.
695
00:28:11,124 --> 00:28:14,257
It was just--
You know, never... my thing.
696
00:28:14,431 --> 00:28:15,824
[Rachel laughing]
697
00:28:17,870 --> 00:28:19,393
- Call me crazy.
- [Rachel] You're a liar.
698
00:28:19,567 --> 00:28:20,524
I call you a liar.
699
00:28:20,699 --> 00:28:21,787
Ah, check this out.
700
00:28:21,961 --> 00:28:23,179
- My assistant.
- [Rachel] Uh-huh.
701
00:28:23,353 --> 00:28:24,703
- 22. Right?
- [Rachel] Uh-huh.
702
00:28:24,877 --> 00:28:26,617
Happened to attend
the Ivy League,
703
00:28:26,792 --> 00:28:28,532
- happens to be attractive.
- [Rachel] Of course.
704
00:28:28,707 --> 00:28:31,622
My-- Well,
our Christmas party--
705
00:28:31,797 --> 00:28:32,711
- The office Christmas party,
- [Rachel] Mm-hm.
706
00:28:32,885 --> 00:28:33,929
she's wearing this, uh,
707
00:28:34,843 --> 00:28:36,018
I guess what you
would call
708
00:28:36,192 --> 00:28:37,890
- a shortish skirt,
- [Rachel] Ah.
709
00:28:38,064 --> 00:28:41,632
and this guy, this analyst,
he takes out his cell phone,
710
00:28:41,807 --> 00:28:43,504
he takes a super zoomed in,
711
00:28:43,678 --> 00:28:45,941
close up picture
of my assistant's rear end,
712
00:28:46,550 --> 00:28:47,813
and it was,
like, this big joke.
713
00:28:47,987 --> 00:28:49,684
It was no big deal
to totally degrade,
714
00:28:49,858 --> 00:28:51,425
totally objectify this woman,
715
00:28:51,599 --> 00:28:53,601
to reduce her
Ivy League intellect
716
00:28:53,775 --> 00:28:55,559
to a Snapchat
of her visible thong.
717
00:28:55,734 --> 00:28:57,170
- They pass the picture to you?
- Pass the picture to everybody.
718
00:28:57,213 --> 00:28:58,737
- Did you jerk off?
- I got the guy fired.
719
00:29:00,216 --> 00:29:02,305
Look at you,
chivalry is not dead.
720
00:29:02,479 --> 00:29:04,003
I'm the father
of two girls, okay?
721
00:29:04,177 --> 00:29:06,440
That kind of shit makes me--
722
00:29:06,614 --> 00:29:09,965
Ugh. I got the office to
institute this code of conduct.
723
00:29:10,139 --> 00:29:14,578
Zero tolerance policy, no
discrimination, no harassment,
724
00:29:14,753 --> 00:29:17,277
no excuses. So, basically
at Scorch Capital,
725
00:29:17,451 --> 00:29:19,801
we hear you
talking locker room talk,
726
00:29:19,975 --> 00:29:22,586
we-- we hear you ask
a coworker out on a date.
727
00:29:22,761 --> 00:29:24,980
[clicking tongue]
That's it, man. You're gone.
728
00:29:25,154 --> 00:29:26,852
Considering the birthrate
is in decline,
729
00:29:27,026 --> 00:29:28,679
is it really the best idea
to prevent people from asking
730
00:29:28,854 --> 00:29:30,725
other people
out on dates at work?
731
00:29:30,899 --> 00:29:33,206
It's better than
the alternative, right?
732
00:29:33,380 --> 00:29:35,948
Where working women have
to put up with sexual innuendos
733
00:29:36,122 --> 00:29:38,515
and micro-aggressions from
their male colleagues all day.
734
00:29:38,689 --> 00:29:40,648
The-- the workplace
needs to be a safe space.
735
00:29:40,822 --> 00:29:42,476
[Rachel]
Okay, but safe from what?
736
00:29:42,650 --> 00:29:44,783
What is this, you know,
attack of the killer cubicles?
737
00:29:44,957 --> 00:29:48,830
Safe from prejudice. Okay?
Safe from bias.
738
00:29:49,004 --> 00:29:50,919
I campaigned for gender neutral
bathrooms, for instance.
739
00:29:51,093 --> 00:29:52,747
Men pee on the seat.
740
00:29:52,921 --> 00:29:55,271
I campaigned for-- We have
a gender nonbinary employee,
741
00:29:55,445 --> 00:29:57,360
and I got
the office to institute--
742
00:29:57,534 --> 00:30:00,755
I got the office to initiate
this whole training seminar
743
00:30:00,929 --> 00:30:03,062
on how to respect the person's
preferred pronouns.
744
00:30:03,236 --> 00:30:05,281
There's a difference between
respecting someone's pronouns
745
00:30:05,455 --> 00:30:07,109
and forcing me to use them.
746
00:30:07,283 --> 00:30:09,155
Is this you-- Are you just
playing devil's advocate here,
747
00:30:09,329 --> 00:30:11,157
or do you really
believe what you're saying?
748
00:30:11,331 --> 00:30:12,985
Do you?
749
00:30:13,159 --> 00:30:16,902
Yes, of course. I mean,
I take this stuff seriously.
750
00:30:17,076 --> 00:30:18,686
Pluralism is a thing to me.
751
00:30:18,860 --> 00:30:21,254
Enfranchising people,
making room at the table,
752
00:30:21,428 --> 00:30:23,473
realizing it's time
for the tables to turn.
753
00:30:23,647 --> 00:30:25,867
[Rachel]
Wow, you're so woke, Cal!
754
00:30:26,041 --> 00:30:28,217
Baby-- No. [mumbling]
755
00:30:29,001 --> 00:30:29,958
Baby steps in
the right direction.
756
00:30:30,132 --> 00:30:31,177
[Rachel]
Baby steps.
757
00:30:31,873 --> 00:30:33,614
Speaking of babies,
758
00:30:33,788 --> 00:30:36,573
you uh, you have any interest
759
00:30:36,747 --> 00:30:39,359
- in the baby having?
- [Rachel] Ugh, okay, whoa.
760
00:30:39,533 --> 00:30:40,969
Is that, like,
your pick up line?
761
00:30:41,143 --> 00:30:43,754
It's how I met my wife.
"Uh, hey, I'm Calvin.
762
00:30:43,929 --> 00:30:45,931
"Do you have any
interest in the baby making?"
763
00:30:46,105 --> 00:30:47,497
[both laughing]
764
00:30:47,671 --> 00:30:49,499
[Rachel] I, uh, no.
No. I'm done with men.
765
00:30:49,673 --> 00:30:51,284
- Men are just moot.
- Women?
766
00:30:51,458 --> 00:30:53,112
Ooh, I have zero interest
in dating in general.
767
00:30:53,286 --> 00:30:55,027
Have you tried online dating?
768
00:30:55,201 --> 00:30:56,811
Uh, online dating is how you
end up in a storage facility,
769
00:30:56,855 --> 00:30:57,986
being skinned alive by
a serial killer.
770
00:30:58,160 --> 00:30:59,858
I read this book, right?
771
00:31:00,032 --> 00:31:01,990
This book by this sociologist,
that's basically about how
772
00:31:02,164 --> 00:31:04,514
the per capita rate of
psychopaths in our society is,
773
00:31:04,688 --> 00:31:06,865
like, wildly underestimated.
774
00:31:07,039 --> 00:31:09,780
And it's not overestimating
to say upwards of, like,
775
00:31:09,955 --> 00:31:11,260
2% of Americans--
776
00:31:11,434 --> 00:31:12,958
That's like six million people
777
00:31:13,132 --> 00:31:14,568
could be potential psychopaths.
778
00:31:14,742 --> 00:31:16,700
Now, the majority
of psychopaths
779
00:31:16,875 --> 00:31:18,746
aren't actually homicidal.
780
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:20,356
The majority
are high functioning,
781
00:31:20,530 --> 00:31:22,837
high income earners,
or titans of industry.
782
00:31:23,011 --> 00:31:25,753
They don't-- they don't break
a sweat under pressure.
783
00:31:25,927 --> 00:31:29,713
Their blood runs cold.
Doctors, lawyers, neurosurgeons.
784
00:31:29,888 --> 00:31:31,193
You know?
785
00:31:31,367 --> 00:31:33,108
My chiropractor
could be a psychopath.
786
00:31:33,282 --> 00:31:34,718
[Rachel] Yeah. My point is,
I'm not going out with someone
787
00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:37,330
I met online,
without a stun gun in my purse.
788
00:31:37,504 --> 00:31:38,853
- You have a stun gun?
- I'm fucking with you,
789
00:31:39,027 --> 00:31:40,594
but I could
totally buy a stun gun
790
00:31:40,768 --> 00:31:42,857
if I wanted to. You know,
you can buy anything online.
791
00:31:43,031 --> 00:31:45,729
Anybody can check out
pictures of your McMansion.
792
00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:47,079
Case in point.
793
00:31:47,253 --> 00:31:49,168
I do not trust technology.
794
00:31:49,342 --> 00:31:52,736
Don't tell me you don't think
our phones aren't recording
795
00:31:52,911 --> 00:31:55,391
us right now, selling
our dirty little secrets
796
00:31:55,565 --> 00:31:59,265
to third party advertisers.
Surveillance state, man.
797
00:31:59,439 --> 00:32:00,875
You can run,
but you can't hide.
798
00:32:01,049 --> 00:32:02,703
I have nothing to hide.
799
00:32:02,877 --> 00:32:05,706
You have a family. What if
some pervert jerks off to photos
800
00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:07,403
you post of your daughters
online?
801
00:32:07,577 --> 00:32:11,103
What if search engines list
your-- your home address,
802
00:32:11,277 --> 00:32:12,756
your wife's phone and email?
803
00:32:13,322 --> 00:32:15,716
There are a lot of weirdos
with Wi-Fi access.
804
00:32:15,890 --> 00:32:19,589
I'm deleting all my social
media. Thank you very much.
805
00:32:19,763 --> 00:32:21,243
You know--
you can't be too careful.
806
00:32:21,417 --> 00:32:24,464
Yeah. I'm going to erase
my entire digital footprint.
807
00:32:24,638 --> 00:32:25,900
Do it.
808
00:32:26,074 --> 00:32:28,250
- Maybe men are not moot.
- [laughing] No.
809
00:32:28,424 --> 00:32:29,860
Maybe men are not moot.
810
00:32:30,035 --> 00:32:32,385
Maybe you just
haven't met the right man.
811
00:32:32,559 --> 00:32:36,476
I mean, here you are--
No. Look, look. You're this--
812
00:32:37,042 --> 00:32:38,304
You're this very--
813
00:32:40,349 --> 00:32:43,700
beautiful, very intelligent
woman without a wedding ring.
814
00:32:43,874 --> 00:32:45,354
You have to know guys
are going to hit
815
00:32:45,528 --> 00:32:47,008
on you this weekend.
816
00:32:47,182 --> 00:32:49,315
- Oh, boy. Oh, my God.
- Like... a ton of guys.
817
00:32:49,489 --> 00:32:51,447
99% of them
might be total losers,
818
00:32:51,621 --> 00:32:53,362
but maybe, just maybe,
819
00:32:53,536 --> 00:32:57,149
one of these guys might turn
out to be, you know, Mr. Right.
820
00:32:57,323 --> 00:32:59,412
I've already met.
Mr. Right. Mr. Right...
821
00:33:02,632 --> 00:33:04,112
Mr. Right can do no wrong.
822
00:33:04,286 --> 00:33:06,723
Put that thing away!
823
00:33:06,897 --> 00:33:08,856
Jesus, you serious--
824
00:33:09,030 --> 00:33:11,598
You seriously travel
with that thing? Do you, like,
825
00:33:12,164 --> 00:33:13,904
pack it every time
you're hopping on a plane?
826
00:33:14,079 --> 00:33:17,082
Toothbrush, check. Deodorant,
check. Oversized dildo, check.
827
00:33:17,256 --> 00:33:19,562
Mr. Right is my favorite
traveling companion.
828
00:33:19,736 --> 00:33:21,216
I bet.
829
00:33:21,390 --> 00:33:23,088
- Mr. Right can do no wrong.
- [Calvin groaning]
830
00:33:23,262 --> 00:33:24,611
He doesn't bitch and moan,
831
00:33:24,785 --> 00:33:26,308
he gives me what I want
when I want it,
832
00:33:26,482 --> 00:33:28,702
I just have my way with him.
What's he going to do?
833
00:33:28,876 --> 00:33:30,573
Say no?
He's not in the mood?
834
00:33:31,618 --> 00:33:34,012
Uh, most men are in the mood
most of the time.
835
00:33:34,186 --> 00:33:35,839
As hard as it may be
for you to believe,
836
00:33:36,014 --> 00:33:39,104
uh, I didn't fly all
the way out here to meet a guy.
837
00:33:39,278 --> 00:33:40,975
That is not why I'm here.
838
00:33:41,149 --> 00:33:43,934
Let me guess, you're here
for the two-for-one happy hour?
839
00:33:44,109 --> 00:33:47,025
To be honest,
I wasn't planning
840
00:33:47,199 --> 00:33:48,417
on being here initially.
841
00:33:48,591 --> 00:33:50,376
Never in a million years did
842
00:33:50,550 --> 00:33:52,378
I think I'd go
to my college reunion.
843
00:33:53,292 --> 00:33:55,033
Well, what changed your mind?
844
00:33:56,208 --> 00:33:58,645
You. [chuckling]
845
00:33:58,819 --> 00:34:00,647
I was looking
at your post online,
846
00:34:00,821 --> 00:34:02,257
you know, you reposted
to the invitation
847
00:34:02,431 --> 00:34:04,433
and you were telling
other people to repost it,
848
00:34:04,607 --> 00:34:06,305
and you shared
the link to RSVP,
849
00:34:06,479 --> 00:34:08,742
I mean, God, it was safe
to assume that you were coming.
850
00:34:08,916 --> 00:34:10,570
It was safe to assume
you'd be here.
851
00:34:10,744 --> 00:34:12,224
[Calvin] You came here because
you knew I was coming?
852
00:34:12,398 --> 00:34:13,790
Because of me.
853
00:34:14,356 --> 00:34:16,445
Because of us.
854
00:34:16,619 --> 00:34:18,230
Us?
855
00:34:18,404 --> 00:34:19,883
- Us.
- Us?
856
00:34:20,058 --> 00:34:21,407
- Us.
- You, like--
857
00:34:22,930 --> 00:34:24,584
[explosion noise]
858
00:34:24,758 --> 00:34:27,282
Are you, like, having second
thoughts about breaking up
859
00:34:27,456 --> 00:34:28,675
with me?
860
00:34:29,154 --> 00:34:30,677
I have some, uh,
861
00:34:31,808 --> 00:34:34,333
regrets, I guess, about
how I handled the situation.
862
00:34:34,507 --> 00:34:36,248
But, I don't hold it
against you.
863
00:34:36,422 --> 00:34:38,685
You know, like,
water under the bridge.
864
00:34:38,859 --> 00:34:40,078
[Rachel] Don't think I'm
batshit crazy. [faux giggling]
865
00:34:40,252 --> 00:34:41,992
Crazy is one thing, batshit is--
866
00:34:42,167 --> 00:34:43,559
[Rachel] Yeah, I still think
about you, like, all the time.
867
00:34:44,952 --> 00:34:47,172
I mean, I haven't--
You're not even a part of my--
868
00:34:47,694 --> 00:34:49,174
It's not like
I've seen you since school.
869
00:34:49,348 --> 00:34:51,045
But there you are.
You're, like, hovering--
870
00:34:51,219 --> 00:34:53,961
you're like this big,
black Calvin cloud
871
00:34:54,135 --> 00:34:55,745
- always hanging over me.
- [Calvin] Ominous.
872
00:34:55,919 --> 00:34:57,225
Closure.
873
00:34:57,704 --> 00:34:59,184
I need to close
that chapter of my life
874
00:34:59,358 --> 00:35:01,447
- so I can move on with my life.
- Closure? Okay.
875
00:35:01,621 --> 00:35:04,014
After this,
we both go our separate ways.
876
00:35:04,189 --> 00:35:06,278
After this, we probably
won't see each other again.
877
00:35:06,452 --> 00:35:09,890
Maybe, like, ever. So, this
is it. It's just tonight.
878
00:35:10,804 --> 00:35:13,589
One night. One last chance
to say goodbye for good.
879
00:35:14,242 --> 00:35:16,462
[inhaling] I mean,
goodbye is a foregone--
880
00:35:17,115 --> 00:35:18,377
Goodbye is inevitable.
881
00:35:19,682 --> 00:35:21,989
We're all adults here. We're
not animals.
882
00:35:22,163 --> 00:35:23,817
- Mm-hm.
- Yeah, yeah, okay.
883
00:35:24,644 --> 00:35:27,908
We might still have
feelings for each other.
884
00:35:29,736 --> 00:35:30,998
We might have a certain...
885
00:35:32,652 --> 00:35:34,349
- attraction.
- [Rachel] Mm-hmm.
886
00:35:35,002 --> 00:35:39,659
All of this is fun,
but none of this is...
887
00:35:40,355 --> 00:35:43,097
I mean, is it--
None of this is actionable.
888
00:35:44,098 --> 00:35:45,621
We're not, uh,
889
00:35:45,795 --> 00:35:47,232
we don't have
any illusions, right?
890
00:35:47,406 --> 00:35:49,538
We're not sitting
here misleading each other,
891
00:35:49,712 --> 00:35:53,368
or leading each other on.
I'm married. Happily married.
892
00:35:53,542 --> 00:35:56,154
- Very happily.
- [Rachel] So am I. Hm.
893
00:35:57,894 --> 00:35:59,853
- Wait.
- I was fucking with you.
894
00:36:00,027 --> 00:36:02,029
Yeah, I married
Mike seven years ago.
895
00:36:03,291 --> 00:36:04,814
He's a cardiac surgeon.
896
00:36:04,988 --> 00:36:07,774
Talk about hands.
We have a kid, a little boy.
897
00:36:07,948 --> 00:36:10,342
- Light of my life.
- Kid? Ah!
898
00:36:10,516 --> 00:36:12,431
That's-- How old?
899
00:36:12,605 --> 00:36:14,346
Two. Billy's two.
900
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,436
He just turned two, actually,
and Mike is Irish Catholic.
901
00:36:17,610 --> 00:36:20,613
He has, like-- He wants
to have, like, five kids,
902
00:36:20,787 --> 00:36:22,832
which is like--
I'm like, whoa,
903
00:36:23,006 --> 00:36:24,486
easier said than done, Mike.
904
00:36:24,660 --> 00:36:27,315
Easier said than done.
My uterus is on hiatus.
905
00:36:27,489 --> 00:36:31,232
So, uh, are they, uh-- Is your
husband coming here to the--
906
00:36:31,406 --> 00:36:34,061
No, no, no. Yeah,
they're back in Sarasota.
907
00:36:34,235 --> 00:36:36,672
We have a house on the water,
on the ocean, actually,
908
00:36:36,846 --> 00:36:38,239
which is so nice. But...
909
00:36:38,413 --> 00:36:39,806
Earlier you said, well I--
910
00:36:39,980 --> 00:36:41,286
I think you said you
flew in from Phoenix.
911
00:36:41,460 --> 00:36:42,765
Correct me if I'm wrong.
Earlier, I asked you
912
00:36:42,939 --> 00:36:44,724
where you
were based and you said Phoenix.
913
00:36:44,898 --> 00:36:48,249
I said that, um, so I spend
a lot of time in Phoenix
914
00:36:48,423 --> 00:36:49,816
because Phoenix
is corporate headquarters.
915
00:36:49,990 --> 00:36:51,731
So that's probably
what you heard.
916
00:36:51,905 --> 00:36:54,777
Oh, I think I thought I heard
you say you were based there.
917
00:36:54,951 --> 00:36:56,692
He said she said, I guess.
918
00:36:56,866 --> 00:36:59,521
Do you-- I'm sure you travel
a lot with your line of work.
919
00:36:59,695 --> 00:37:01,306
Totally, yeah.
920
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:03,046
Marketing is one of
those things where, you know,
921
00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:04,874
you have to go to the client,
not the other way around.
922
00:37:04,918 --> 00:37:06,572
I thought
you said pharmaceuticals.
923
00:37:07,268 --> 00:37:09,009
Marketing for pharmaceuticals.
924
00:37:09,183 --> 00:37:12,360
Oh, must be tough,
airport to airport,
925
00:37:12,534 --> 00:37:16,016
especially with a family.
Have you been Facetiming--
926
00:37:16,190 --> 00:37:17,365
Sorry, what's his, uh?
927
00:37:17,539 --> 00:37:18,888
Will, my son's
name's Will. Yeah.
928
00:37:19,062 --> 00:37:20,847
I was glued to my phone
at the airport.
929
00:37:21,021 --> 00:37:22,892
I thought you said his
name was Billy? [chuckling]
930
00:37:23,066 --> 00:37:26,113
Okay. Yes. So that's a nickname.
931
00:37:26,287 --> 00:37:28,028
So, do you guys
not do nicknames over
932
00:37:28,202 --> 00:37:29,377
at the McMansion?
933
00:37:29,551 --> 00:37:31,336
Do you really have a kid?
934
00:37:31,510 --> 00:37:33,294
Do you really work
in pharmaceuticals?
935
00:37:33,468 --> 00:37:37,298
I enjoy pharmaceuticals.
I partake.
936
00:37:38,168 --> 00:37:39,866
Too much partaking,
perhaps, in my past.
937
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:41,824
But, uh, let's just say that
938
00:37:41,998 --> 00:37:46,438
I am simpatico
with controlled substances.
939
00:37:48,266 --> 00:37:49,571
I'm sorry, I'm confused.
940
00:37:49,745 --> 00:37:51,094
I'm a compulsive liar.
941
00:37:51,269 --> 00:37:52,879
So, wait, you were
lying about being single,
942
00:37:53,053 --> 00:37:54,402
or lying about being married?
943
00:37:54,576 --> 00:37:55,838
Are you lying
about being happily married?
944
00:37:56,012 --> 00:37:57,231
Because of happily married man
945
00:37:57,405 --> 00:37:58,493
wouldn't have joined
me for a drink.
946
00:37:58,667 --> 00:38:00,016
Hang on.
947
00:38:00,495 --> 00:38:02,192
Can you please tell me
what you're trying to tell me?
948
00:38:02,367 --> 00:38:04,325
Where do you actually live?
949
00:38:05,457 --> 00:38:09,243
I've lived all over.
Joliet, Sarasota, Des Moines.
950
00:38:09,417 --> 00:38:11,071
I've been, uh, bouncing around.
951
00:38:11,245 --> 00:38:12,899
I've been living out of
motels that have mini fringes,
952
00:38:13,073 --> 00:38:14,596
I've been living off
food stamps.
953
00:38:14,770 --> 00:38:16,946
Shit hole, to shit hole.
I can't keep it all straight.
954
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:18,296
Are you being serious
right now?
955
00:38:18,470 --> 00:38:20,776
Yeah, I have some
pretty serious problems.
956
00:38:20,950 --> 00:38:22,256
I have, like, zero money.
957
00:38:22,430 --> 00:38:24,432
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
College reunion.
958
00:38:24,606 --> 00:38:26,434
People are supposed to talk
about how great they're doing.
959
00:38:26,608 --> 00:38:28,175
Everything's just hunky dory.
960
00:38:28,349 --> 00:38:31,221
But, let's uh--
let's cut the shit, right?
961
00:38:31,396 --> 00:38:32,701
Let's let shit get real.
962
00:38:32,875 --> 00:38:34,921
Let's be honest
with each other, Cal.
963
00:38:35,095 --> 00:38:37,793
I'm at the bottom
of the deepest, darkest pit
964
00:38:37,967 --> 00:38:39,926
and I'm not
talking about Cleveland.
965
00:38:40,100 --> 00:38:42,320
Physically, emotionally,
financially.
966
00:38:42,494 --> 00:38:44,060
Can't your husband--
967
00:38:44,234 --> 00:38:47,716
What husband? He left me
and took my kid or I left him.
968
00:38:47,890 --> 00:38:50,023
Either way, he's a nonentity,
non-- non-existent.
969
00:38:50,197 --> 00:38:51,981
Or, check this out,
maybe he never existed.
970
00:38:52,155 --> 00:38:54,114
Maybe Mike the cardiac surgeon
is a figment of my imagination.
971
00:38:54,288 --> 00:38:55,507
Are your parents--
972
00:38:55,681 --> 00:38:57,073
They're out
of the picture. Yeah.
973
00:38:57,247 --> 00:38:58,640
They Photoshopped
themselves out of my life,
974
00:38:58,814 --> 00:39:01,382
persona non grata
once I dropped out of college.
975
00:39:01,556 --> 00:39:03,645
- Wait a minute. You--
- Yeah, I dropped out.
976
00:39:03,819 --> 00:39:07,127
That's why you couldn't
register me before.
977
00:39:07,301 --> 00:39:08,998
You couldn't find
my name on the list of alumni
978
00:39:09,172 --> 00:39:10,870
because I'm not
technically an alumni,
979
00:39:11,044 --> 00:39:12,437
because I didn't
technically graduate.
980
00:39:12,611 --> 00:39:14,134
Holy shit. I had no idea.
981
00:39:14,308 --> 00:39:15,962
[Rachel] Well, I mean,
we had no contact, really
982
00:39:16,136 --> 00:39:19,226
after we broke up.
We didn't exactly stay in touch.
983
00:39:19,748 --> 00:39:20,880
I wasn't, like,
keeping you abreast
984
00:39:21,054 --> 00:39:22,708
of my academic travails.
985
00:39:22,882 --> 00:39:24,927
I thought I heard you'd
transferred, or maybe I just--
986
00:39:25,101 --> 00:39:26,929
[Rachel] No, I didn't transfer.
I dropped out.
987
00:39:27,887 --> 00:39:29,105
- Yeah.
- Why?
988
00:39:30,977 --> 00:39:34,110
I don't know. You don't
need a degree to be an actor.
989
00:39:34,284 --> 00:39:36,504
You know, the whole
idea of paying
990
00:39:36,678 --> 00:39:38,767
for a piece of paper
that legitimizes your artistic
991
00:39:38,941 --> 00:39:41,640
prowess, I mean, it's a scam,
right? It's a total shakedown.
992
00:39:41,814 --> 00:39:43,206
I was getting deeper
and deeper in debt,
993
00:39:43,381 --> 00:39:44,773
and I just figured, fuck it.
994
00:39:44,947 --> 00:39:46,471
I'll just try my luck
acting in the city.
995
00:39:46,645 --> 00:39:47,950
[Calvin]
Good for you.
996
00:39:48,124 --> 00:39:50,170
It was not.
It was not good for me.
997
00:39:50,649 --> 00:39:53,652
The waiting tables,
the constant rejection,
998
00:39:53,826 --> 00:39:57,656
the regional theater. I shit
you not, I played Lavinia
999
00:39:57,699 --> 00:40:00,615
in a Titus Andronicus
that was set in outer space.
1000
00:40:00,789 --> 00:40:02,878
The director literally set
the mise en scene on Mars.
1001
00:40:03,052 --> 00:40:04,314
I'd like to see that.
1002
00:40:05,620 --> 00:40:07,535
[Rachel] Ugh. My career
has not been super awesome.
1003
00:40:08,057 --> 00:40:09,842
I started looking
at it objectively,
1004
00:40:10,451 --> 00:40:11,974
I started getting
super depressed
1005
00:40:12,148 --> 00:40:14,542
and I started doing drugs,
like, a lot of drugs,
1006
00:40:14,716 --> 00:40:19,068
like, an astonishing amount of
narcotics have entered my body.
1007
00:40:19,242 --> 00:40:20,853
But I am done
with that shit now.
1008
00:40:21,027 --> 00:40:22,550
Uh...
1009
00:40:22,724 --> 00:40:26,598
I just got out of rehab,
actually. Don't worry, um,
1010
00:40:26,772 --> 00:40:27,903
I'm actually
just drinking orange juice.
1011
00:40:28,077 --> 00:40:29,557
Rehab?
1012
00:40:29,731 --> 00:40:31,341
Yeah. Literally
came here straight from rehab.
1013
00:40:32,212 --> 00:40:33,735
I'm actually not
even staying in this hotel.
1014
00:40:33,909 --> 00:40:35,563
I couldn't afford a room.
1015
00:40:35,737 --> 00:40:37,260
I'm thinking I might sleep
in the fitness center.
1016
00:40:37,435 --> 00:40:38,827
I can get you--
1017
00:40:39,001 --> 00:40:40,220
And lied about
the airport. I took the bus.
1018
00:40:40,394 --> 00:40:42,091
Not the good bus,
the bus that's,
1019
00:40:42,265 --> 00:40:44,485
like, $10 and there's dried
throw up on the upholstery.
1020
00:40:44,659 --> 00:40:46,313
But I was
at this place in Peoria.
1021
00:40:46,487 --> 00:40:48,837
I was like, um, like
an inpatient, like, you know,
1022
00:40:49,011 --> 00:40:50,622
like, you live there-type place.
1023
00:40:50,796 --> 00:40:53,189
And I've spent a lot of time
in a lot of facilities,
1024
00:40:53,363 --> 00:40:56,323
but this facility was,
like, holistic.
1025
00:40:56,497 --> 00:41:00,066
This was like, you know,
Bikram yoga? Guided meditation,
1026
00:41:00,240 --> 00:41:02,198
learning to start
helping myself
1027
00:41:02,372 --> 00:41:05,332
instead of
hurting myself. Well...
1028
00:41:07,334 --> 00:41:10,032
Burning myself,
actually, I would, um,
1029
00:41:11,599 --> 00:41:17,387
I would light a lighter and
I would take the little flame
1030
00:41:17,562 --> 00:41:20,086
and I would burn
little bitty parts of my body,
1031
00:41:20,608 --> 00:41:23,481
the back of the knee,
the pinky toe, the armpit.
1032
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:26,614
It's a strange smell,
1033
00:41:26,788 --> 00:41:28,268
the smell of burning skin.
It kind of smells like kielbasa.
1034
00:41:28,442 --> 00:41:30,400
- [Calvin] Rachel--
- But, I'm better now.
1035
00:41:30,575 --> 00:41:32,794
I-- uh, they
helped me get better.
1036
00:41:32,968 --> 00:41:35,101
I had this counsellor,
Mary Ellen,
1037
00:41:35,623 --> 00:41:38,278
and Mary Ellen was all about
cutting shit out at the source.
1038
00:41:38,452 --> 00:41:39,714
If you don't find the source,
1039
00:41:39,888 --> 00:41:41,020
you'll never
find a way to wellness.
1040
00:41:41,194 --> 00:41:42,500
The pathways don't matter.
1041
00:41:42,674 --> 00:41:44,937
Therapy, methadone,
a macrobiotic diet.
1042
00:41:45,111 --> 00:41:48,636
And Mary Ellen had this mantra.
You can't face yourself
1043
00:41:48,810 --> 00:41:51,509
in the mirror if you don't
face down your demons first.
1044
00:41:52,510 --> 00:41:54,076
Demons?
1045
00:41:54,250 --> 00:41:56,165
My-- my point is, what
Mary Ellen helped me realize
1046
00:41:56,339 --> 00:41:58,951
is I can't get clean
and sober until I get this shit,
1047
00:41:59,125 --> 00:42:01,431
all this shit off my chest
and out of my system.
1048
00:42:01,606 --> 00:42:02,868
Get it all out.
1049
00:42:03,042 --> 00:42:04,609
It sounds extreme
or something to say this,
1050
00:42:04,783 --> 00:42:06,611
but I think
it needs to be said.
1051
00:42:06,785 --> 00:42:10,179
My life basically ended
after our relationship ended.
1052
00:42:10,876 --> 00:42:13,748
[Calvin] Believe me,
it wasn't easy on me either.
1053
00:42:13,922 --> 00:42:15,271
I went through a--
1054
00:42:15,445 --> 00:42:18,884
I was in a pretty
bad place for a long time.
1055
00:42:19,580 --> 00:42:21,887
I didn't just move on.
You weren't just some girl.
1056
00:42:22,583 --> 00:42:25,020
You were literally the only
person I was with in college.
1057
00:42:25,194 --> 00:42:28,981
You were like this superhuman
entity that landed in my life
1058
00:42:29,155 --> 00:42:30,896
in some extraterrestrial
spacecraft.
1059
00:42:31,070 --> 00:42:33,376
I didn't even recognize you
as the same species.
1060
00:42:33,551 --> 00:42:38,686
It was just, like,
"What is this? What is this?
1061
00:42:38,860 --> 00:42:41,515
What is this beautiful
being all about?
1062
00:42:41,689 --> 00:42:43,822
Just the way your mind works,
just the way--
1063
00:42:45,258 --> 00:42:46,607
I would just stare at you
1064
00:42:46,781 --> 00:42:49,741
and picture
the rest of my life with you,
1065
00:42:49,915 --> 00:42:52,657
and there is no way
my life wouldn't be better
1066
00:42:52,831 --> 00:42:54,093
with you in it.
1067
00:42:56,574 --> 00:42:58,619
Sorry your life
hasn't worked out better.
1068
00:42:58,793 --> 00:43:03,232
I'm sorry that you've
taken some wrong turns, and--
1069
00:43:04,233 --> 00:43:07,062
I'm sorry to say I still
don't understand.
1070
00:43:07,628 --> 00:43:09,978
After all these years,
if you loved me then
1071
00:43:10,152 --> 00:43:13,765
like I loved you,
why did you break up with me?
1072
00:43:13,939 --> 00:43:15,201
[scoffing]
1073
00:43:17,986 --> 00:43:19,814
Because you raped me.
1074
00:43:27,779 --> 00:43:29,041
What?
1075
00:43:32,914 --> 00:43:34,394
Because you raped me.
1076
00:43:44,099 --> 00:43:46,362
Is this some kind of, uh...
1077
00:43:48,887 --> 00:43:54,109
What is this, Rachel?
What's happening?
1078
00:43:54,283 --> 00:43:57,591
We both know what happened
that night at that party.
1079
00:43:57,765 --> 00:43:59,637
I think you think
you know what happened.
1080
00:43:59,811 --> 00:44:01,247
Oh, I know that I know.
1081
00:44:01,421 --> 00:44:05,468
You know that's not true. You
can't just-- I--
1082
00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:08,341
That's not a word
you can just throw around.
1083
00:44:08,515 --> 00:44:12,084
What word? Rape? Rapey-rape?
Rapey pants?
1084
00:44:12,258 --> 00:44:13,825
[Calvin]
Rachel, stop. Please.
1085
00:44:13,999 --> 00:44:15,783
- You didn't stop, why should I?
- No.
1086
00:44:15,957 --> 00:44:17,872
"No" means "yes."
"No" means try harder.
1087
00:44:18,046 --> 00:44:19,787
- Rachel, I'm trying to--
- Cal.
1088
00:44:20,440 --> 00:44:23,573
I-- I want to-- I want to be s--
1089
00:44:23,748 --> 00:44:25,271
I want to be sensitive
about this. I want to--
1090
00:44:25,445 --> 00:44:27,534
I want to handle--
handle this sensitively,
1091
00:44:27,708 --> 00:44:29,275
[Rachel]
You're a sensitive guy.
1092
00:44:29,449 --> 00:44:32,191
Because I know you're going
through a rough patch.
1093
00:44:32,365 --> 00:44:34,280
I know you're in
a fragile place emotionally.
1094
00:44:34,454 --> 00:44:35,673
I know you're
in a vulnerable position.
1095
00:44:35,847 --> 00:44:37,587
You put me in
a vulnerable position.
1096
00:44:37,762 --> 00:44:39,633
Well, let's just
de-escalate for one second.
1097
00:44:39,807 --> 00:44:41,940
Let's just take a moment
to collect ourselves
1098
00:44:42,114 --> 00:44:43,463
and talk about this
in a reasonable--
1099
00:44:43,637 --> 00:44:45,465
To have a rational conversation.
1100
00:44:45,639 --> 00:44:47,206
Am I acting irrationally?
1101
00:44:48,468 --> 00:44:49,730
Am I crying?
1102
00:44:50,731 --> 00:44:52,037
Am I hysterical?
1103
00:44:52,820 --> 00:44:54,343
Am I walking around
blowing a rape whistle?
1104
00:44:54,517 --> 00:44:55,693
[Calvin]
Let's talk about this.
1105
00:44:55,867 --> 00:44:57,085
So, you can talk
yourself out of this?
1106
00:44:57,259 --> 00:44:58,521
- [Calvin] Out of what?
- Out of trouble?
1107
00:44:58,696 --> 00:45:00,306
- [Calvin] I'm not in trouble.
- Not yet.
1108
00:45:01,089 --> 00:45:03,004
Rachel, I'm willing
to hear you out.
1109
00:45:03,178 --> 00:45:04,353
[Rachel] Magnanimous.
1110
00:45:04,527 --> 00:45:06,138
I want to hear what
you have to say.
1111
00:45:06,312 --> 00:45:07,835
- I'm not trying to dismiss you.
- I will not be dismissed.
1112
00:45:07,879 --> 00:45:09,881
Exactly. Totally. I'm not--
1113
00:45:12,144 --> 00:45:13,449
I'm not--
1114
00:45:15,582 --> 00:45:18,193
I'm just a little bit shocked.
[exhaling]
1115
00:45:18,367 --> 00:45:20,718
Don't mistake my being taken
aback for being incredulous.
1116
00:45:20,892 --> 00:45:22,807
I believe in believing
the victim.
1117
00:45:22,981 --> 00:45:25,113
I believe in giving
the victim the benefit of the--
1118
00:45:26,593 --> 00:45:28,116
These are things
I believe in.
1119
00:45:28,290 --> 00:45:30,815
These are positions I take.
I take the woman's side.
1120
00:45:30,989 --> 00:45:32,251
I'm not some--
1121
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:35,558
I'm a strong supporter
of women having a voice,
1122
00:45:35,733 --> 00:45:37,125
women having every right to--
1123
00:45:37,299 --> 00:45:39,127
I mean,
if you were sitting here
1124
00:45:39,301 --> 00:45:44,742
and telling me some-- some man
had done something to you, 100%
1125
00:45:44,916 --> 00:45:47,048
I would believe you,
without a doubt. Without--
1126
00:45:49,747 --> 00:45:52,662
Without hesitation. It just
so happens the man is me
1127
00:45:52,837 --> 00:45:54,447
and I happen to know
what really happened,
1128
00:45:54,621 --> 00:45:56,014
and what didn't happen.
1129
00:45:57,885 --> 00:45:59,539
I didn't expect you to come
right out and confess.
1130
00:45:59,713 --> 00:46:01,193
[Calvin] Confess?
1131
00:46:01,367 --> 00:46:02,585
Confess what?
1132
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:04,979
You have every reason
to deny it.
1133
00:46:05,153 --> 00:46:09,331
But denial is not sustainable.
Trust me, it just festers.
1134
00:46:09,505 --> 00:46:11,594
It's just, God-- Just
like this malignant growth.
1135
00:46:12,291 --> 00:46:13,814
Look, it took me a long
time to be able
1136
00:46:13,988 --> 00:46:15,685
to come out and say it, too.
1137
00:46:15,860 --> 00:46:18,819
It took me a long time to be
able to admit it to myself,
1138
00:46:18,993 --> 00:46:21,039
not to mention anybody else.
1139
00:46:21,213 --> 00:46:23,258
But once I did, once I could
tell myself the truth,
1140
00:46:23,432 --> 00:46:25,652
I could tell
other people the truth
1141
00:46:26,261 --> 00:46:28,263
and it was like this weight
had been lifted.
1142
00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:30,570
I imagine it might
be the same for you, too.
1143
00:46:30,744 --> 00:46:33,486
I mean, it must be hard
keeping it to yourself,
1144
00:46:34,182 --> 00:46:36,315
keeping it from your wife,
your kids, your--
1145
00:46:36,881 --> 00:46:38,491
your boss.
1146
00:46:38,665 --> 00:46:40,188
Everybody knows you
as one kind of person,
1147
00:46:40,362 --> 00:46:42,277
but nobody knows the kind
of person you really are.
1148
00:46:42,451 --> 00:46:44,410
How many people have you told?
1149
00:46:45,803 --> 00:46:47,021
Just a few people.
1150
00:46:47,892 --> 00:46:49,545
The people
at the place in Peoria,
1151
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:50,895
Mary Ellen--
1152
00:46:51,069 --> 00:46:52,548
You told
your therapist my name?
1153
00:46:53,636 --> 00:46:55,987
Maybe just your first name.
I don't really remember.
1154
00:46:56,161 --> 00:46:57,858
Help me remember. Okay?
1155
00:46:58,424 --> 00:46:59,991
Tell me what you think I did.
1156
00:47:00,165 --> 00:47:03,037
Walk me through it, step
by step so I can comprehend--
1157
00:47:03,211 --> 00:47:05,213
so I can wrap my head
around your accusation,
1158
00:47:05,387 --> 00:47:06,824
and clarify
any misunderstandings.
1159
00:47:06,998 --> 00:47:08,738
- Misunderstandings?
- [Calvin] Yes,
1160
00:47:08,913 --> 00:47:11,176
because that's
what I think this is. One big--
1161
00:47:11,350 --> 00:47:13,221
And maybe we can come
1162
00:47:13,395 --> 00:47:15,615
to a better understanding
of that night, together.
1163
00:47:15,789 --> 00:47:17,399
Together.
1164
00:47:17,573 --> 00:47:18,836
[Calvin] I really don't
want this to be adversarial.
1165
00:47:18,879 --> 00:47:20,054
I'm not trying to be
confrontational,
1166
00:47:20,228 --> 00:47:21,795
or defensive about this.
1167
00:47:21,969 --> 00:47:24,406
Relax. You're not a defendant.
You're not on the stand.
1168
00:47:24,580 --> 00:47:26,669
And I'm not trying
to cross-examine you.
1169
00:47:27,192 --> 00:47:28,802
I'm not trying
to poke holes in your--
1170
00:47:28,976 --> 00:47:30,195
Well, poking
is the topic at hand.
1171
00:47:30,369 --> 00:47:31,631
[Calvin]
I'm just trying to--
1172
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:34,068
I think it would be useful
1173
00:47:34,242 --> 00:47:35,853
for us to reach
some kind of consensus,
1174
00:47:36,027 --> 00:47:38,681
at least a framework of, um--
1175
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:42,207
To reconstruct the events
of that night and say,
1176
00:47:42,381 --> 00:47:43,643
"Hey what do
we remember here?
1177
00:47:43,817 --> 00:47:45,950
What-- what might
we be misremembering?"
1178
00:47:46,124 --> 00:47:47,429
I remember the party.
1179
00:47:48,256 --> 00:47:50,432
The party-- The house party
my roommates decided to throw
1180
00:47:50,606 --> 00:47:53,000
behind my back. Uh, I had
midterms the next day
1181
00:47:53,174 --> 00:47:55,220
and I was studying in
the corner until you showed up.
1182
00:47:55,394 --> 00:47:56,656
Showed up, kind of, uh,
1183
00:47:56,830 --> 00:47:58,614
remember I came
late after my play?
1184
00:47:58,788 --> 00:48:01,356
I was doing the Euripides play,
uh, and the party was packed.
1185
00:48:01,530 --> 00:48:05,099
The music was super loud, we
couldn't even hear each other.
1186
00:48:05,273 --> 00:48:07,754
But you said you had something
you needed to tell me,
1187
00:48:07,928 --> 00:48:10,235
something important
and you took me upstairs.
1188
00:48:10,409 --> 00:48:14,500
You-- No, I asked you if you
wanted to go upstairs
1189
00:48:14,674 --> 00:48:16,589
so we could talk, so
we could hear ourselves think.
1190
00:48:16,763 --> 00:48:18,591
- You took me upstairs.
- You followed me.
1191
00:48:18,765 --> 00:48:21,028
You took me into your bedroom,
you closed the door.
1192
00:48:21,202 --> 00:48:23,248
- I didn't lock it.
- We-- we were in your bedroom
1193
00:48:23,422 --> 00:48:25,946
and you asked me to sit
down and I asked you,
1194
00:48:26,120 --> 00:48:27,730
"What did you want to tell me?"
1195
00:48:27,905 --> 00:48:29,602
- I told you how I felt.
- You told me the last six months
1196
00:48:29,776 --> 00:48:31,082
were the best months
of your life.
1197
00:48:31,256 --> 00:48:32,518
- They were.
- I couldn't really hear you
1198
00:48:32,692 --> 00:48:34,346
because of the music, but
1199
00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,261
I think you were trying
to tell me that you loved me.
1200
00:48:36,435 --> 00:48:38,437
I did. But you didn't
tell me you loved me back.
1201
00:48:38,611 --> 00:48:39,960
You didn't respond.
1202
00:48:40,134 --> 00:48:41,831
I was, like waiting
on pins and needles.
1203
00:48:42,006 --> 00:48:43,181
I was processing.
1204
00:48:43,355 --> 00:48:44,573
There was, like,
this long pause,
1205
00:48:44,747 --> 00:48:46,271
the longest pause of my life.
1206
00:48:46,445 --> 00:48:48,273
You didn't tell me what you
were thinking, you just--
1207
00:48:48,838 --> 00:48:51,015
- You told me to--
- I told you I needed a drink.
1208
00:48:51,189 --> 00:48:52,842
I left the room
to get you a drink.
1209
00:48:53,017 --> 00:48:54,975
You stayed in the room.
You decided to stay.
1210
00:48:55,149 --> 00:48:56,455
I stayed.
1211
00:48:57,064 --> 00:48:59,197
You brought me back a drink,
a very strong drink.
1212
00:48:59,371 --> 00:49:01,503
A solo cup full of whiskey,
which you chugged.
1213
00:49:01,982 --> 00:49:03,375
I chugged it?
1214
00:49:03,549 --> 00:49:04,767
I chugged one, too.
It was not one sided.
1215
00:49:04,942 --> 00:49:06,117
- You kissed me.
- You kissed me back.
1216
00:49:06,291 --> 00:49:07,640
We were-- we were kissing.
1217
00:49:07,814 --> 00:49:09,250
You started
to take my clothes off.
1218
00:49:09,424 --> 00:49:11,252
- You took off my clothes, too.
- You took out--
1219
00:49:11,426 --> 00:49:12,950
Remember, you took that mask
out of my backpack?
1220
00:49:13,124 --> 00:49:14,952
This satyr mask
from the play, yes.
1221
00:49:15,126 --> 00:49:17,824
You ran around
the room buck naked,
1222
00:49:17,998 --> 00:49:19,565
pretending to be
a mythical goat.
1223
00:49:19,739 --> 00:49:21,306
Like I said,
I was a lightweight.
1224
00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:23,482
Get some whiskey in me
and I'm playing farm animals.
1225
00:49:23,656 --> 00:49:25,484
We started making out.
We started doing other stuff.
1226
00:49:25,658 --> 00:49:28,966
We only did other stuff up to
that point in our relationship,
1227
00:49:29,140 --> 00:49:31,446
six months
of doing other stuff.
1228
00:49:31,620 --> 00:49:33,144
- But we never actually--
- Did the deed.
1229
00:49:33,318 --> 00:49:34,884
We never-- we never made love.
1230
00:49:35,059 --> 00:49:40,107
We talked about-- In the past,
we had had conversations
1231
00:49:40,281 --> 00:49:41,717
about maybe taking things
to the next level--
1232
00:49:41,891 --> 00:49:43,632
We'd talked about it,
but we hadn't decided.
1233
00:49:43,806 --> 00:49:45,504
Taking it, right. We were taking
it one step at a-- There were--
1234
00:49:45,678 --> 00:49:48,420
there were steps along the way,
steps we both took--
1235
00:49:48,594 --> 00:49:50,900
We took our time
with the foreplay aspect.
1236
00:49:51,075 --> 00:49:52,337
The foreplay aspect?
1237
00:49:56,080 --> 00:49:59,561
The aspect of-- You liked
it when I did certain--
1238
00:50:02,608 --> 00:50:05,002
Certain things to you.
1239
00:50:05,176 --> 00:50:06,351
Oral sex?
1240
00:50:06,525 --> 00:50:09,397
Jesus. Oral sex.
Yes, I was--
1241
00:50:09,571 --> 00:50:10,877
Going down on me?
1242
00:50:11,051 --> 00:50:12,531
Going down on you. Yes.
Yes, that night.
1243
00:50:12,705 --> 00:50:14,359
The night in question.
1244
00:50:14,533 --> 00:50:16,796
The night of, uh, you asked
me to-- I was performing--
1245
00:50:16,970 --> 00:50:18,841
- I asked you?
- I mean, you indicated--
1246
00:50:19,016 --> 00:50:20,756
- Indicated?
- You seemed to imply--
1247
00:50:20,930 --> 00:50:22,932
- You seemed to be requesting--
- Requesting?
1248
00:50:23,107 --> 00:50:24,369
You grabbed my goddamn hair
1249
00:50:24,543 --> 00:50:26,501
and pushed my face
between your legs.
1250
00:50:27,763 --> 00:50:28,982
[quietly] I was performing--
1251
00:50:29,156 --> 00:50:30,723
You wanted me to perform--
1252
00:50:30,897 --> 00:50:33,160
- Cunnilingus.
- Can we agree?
1253
00:50:33,334 --> 00:50:34,727
I agree.
1254
00:50:34,901 --> 00:50:35,945
You're an expert
in the cunnilingus department.
1255
00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:38,557
Jesus [exhaling] So.
1256
00:50:40,950 --> 00:50:42,343
- There I was--
- Eating me out.
1257
00:50:42,517 --> 00:50:43,997
- Can we not?
- You flipped me over.
1258
00:50:44,171 --> 00:50:45,955
No, no, no, no. You turned over,
I didn't flip you.
1259
00:50:46,130 --> 00:50:47,914
You flipped yourself
over onto your, um--
1260
00:50:48,088 --> 00:50:49,742
I was face down on the bed.
1261
00:50:49,916 --> 00:50:51,787
Yes. Because I was-- In
the past-- In past encounters,
1262
00:50:51,961 --> 00:50:55,226
you asked me to do it like that,
you taught me how to--
1263
00:50:57,793 --> 00:51:00,187
You said you liked it like that,
when I used my fingers.
1264
00:51:00,361 --> 00:51:02,276
From behind. Uh...
1265
00:51:02,885 --> 00:51:05,279
That was
an established thing, right?
1266
00:51:05,453 --> 00:51:08,587
You liked it when
I fingered you from behind.
1267
00:51:08,761 --> 00:51:11,024
You had said
on previous conversations,
1268
00:51:11,198 --> 00:51:13,722
you said that
the angle felt better.
1269
00:51:13,896 --> 00:51:15,637
I felt like
I was going to die.
1270
00:51:15,811 --> 00:51:17,857
All of a sudden,
I felt really weird.
1271
00:51:18,031 --> 00:51:19,511
I started seeing weird stuff.
1272
00:51:20,425 --> 00:51:22,383
You know, I could see you out
of the corner of my eye,
1273
00:51:22,557 --> 00:51:24,516
you were behind me. You were
wearing that goat mask.
1274
00:51:24,690 --> 00:51:28,433
Except now, I shit you not,
you looked like an actual goat.
1275
00:51:28,607 --> 00:51:32,698
Like, your body. It was like
an actual goat body.
1276
00:51:32,872 --> 00:51:35,527
You had, like, hooves,
and this massive erection,
1277
00:51:35,701 --> 00:51:38,138
and you made this loud noise,
this, like...
1278
00:51:39,052 --> 00:51:40,314
Like a bleating noise.
1279
00:51:40,923 --> 00:51:43,926
Then my eyes just [snapping]
went black.
1280
00:51:44,492 --> 00:51:45,711
Like someone just took
1281
00:51:45,885 --> 00:51:47,016
a sharp being blacked
out my eyeballs.
1282
00:51:47,191 --> 00:51:48,453
That's the last
thing I remember.
1283
00:51:48,627 --> 00:51:49,845
Don't remember the actual--
1284
00:51:50,019 --> 00:51:51,543
Two drinks
don't make you black out.
1285
00:51:52,935 --> 00:51:54,328
Two drinks don't
make you hallucinate
1286
00:51:54,502 --> 00:51:56,374
and think your boyfriend
has turned into a goat.
1287
00:51:57,549 --> 00:51:59,464
It wasn't that
I had too much to drink,
1288
00:51:59,638 --> 00:52:01,814
there was something
in my drink.
1289
00:52:01,988 --> 00:52:04,033
Rachel, I swear to God, okay?
1290
00:52:04,208 --> 00:52:06,210
The only thing I put
in your drink was
1291
00:52:06,384 --> 00:52:08,125
a very generous
pour of whiskey.
1292
00:52:08,299 --> 00:52:10,910
An entire solo cup full of
whiskey. That's what you drank.
1293
00:52:11,084 --> 00:52:12,694
Drinking the equivalent of six
1294
00:52:12,868 --> 00:52:14,435
or seven shots is going to
make you a little sleepy--
1295
00:52:14,609 --> 00:52:16,437
[Rachel] I didn't just
fall asleep. No, no, no.
1296
00:52:16,611 --> 00:52:19,353
I, uh, passed the fuck out
and woke up the next morning.
1297
00:52:19,527 --> 00:52:20,876
I woke up with you, remember?
1298
00:52:21,050 --> 00:52:22,356
I got you that bacon,
egg and cheese?
1299
00:52:22,530 --> 00:52:23,749
Do you always
bring breakfast in bed
1300
00:52:23,923 --> 00:52:25,054
to the girls
you give roofies to?
1301
00:52:25,229 --> 00:52:26,621
Rachel.
1302
00:52:26,795 --> 00:52:28,406
I woke up, I got dressed
without saying a word,
1303
00:52:28,580 --> 00:52:30,712
and I walked
all the way across campus.
1304
00:52:30,886 --> 00:52:32,975
It's a long walk,
the longest walk of my life.
1305
00:52:33,498 --> 00:52:36,022
Got home, took a shower.
I took it sitting down
1306
00:52:36,196 --> 00:52:38,633
and I didn't take off
my underwear.
1307
00:52:39,373 --> 00:52:40,679
My underwear
had blood on it.
1308
00:52:40,853 --> 00:52:42,811
[Calvin] Blood?
Why would there be blood?
1309
00:52:43,334 --> 00:52:45,466
I made up that stuff
about sleeping around.
1310
00:52:46,119 --> 00:52:47,816
I hadn't slept with anyone.
1311
00:52:48,339 --> 00:52:49,731
It was my first time
1312
00:52:49,905 --> 00:52:51,690
and I wanted
my first time to be with you,
1313
00:52:51,864 --> 00:52:53,996
I actually did, but I didn't
want it like that.
1314
00:52:54,171 --> 00:52:55,737
You are a compulsive liar.
1315
00:52:55,911 --> 00:52:57,652
[Rachel] I called you that night
and broke up with you,
1316
00:52:57,826 --> 00:53:00,873
but I didn't call anyone else.
I didn't even call my parents,
1317
00:53:01,656 --> 00:53:03,745
- and I never reported it.
- Reported what?
1318
00:53:03,919 --> 00:53:05,269
You fucked me in my sleep.
1319
00:53:05,878 --> 00:53:07,706
You fucked me
when I wasn't awake.
1320
00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:10,274
Of course, you were awake.
You were making noises.
1321
00:53:10,448 --> 00:53:12,537
- You were moaning and groaning.
- People talk in their sleep.
1322
00:53:12,711 --> 00:53:14,234
Why can people moan
and groan in their sleep?
1323
00:53:14,408 --> 00:53:16,062
You were moving,
I saw your body move.
1324
00:53:16,236 --> 00:53:17,629
[Rachel]
It was super dark in your room.
1325
00:53:17,803 --> 00:53:19,544
I saw your reactions.
I saw your reactions.
1326
00:53:19,718 --> 00:53:21,589
You definitely had definite
physical and vocal reactions,
1327
00:53:21,763 --> 00:53:24,418
reactions to
what I was doing sexually.
1328
00:53:24,592 --> 00:53:26,246
You weren't exactly
incapacitated.
1329
00:53:26,420 --> 00:53:29,118
Uh, I wasn't exactly
participating either.
1330
00:53:29,293 --> 00:53:31,295
Hey, how could I participate
when I was lying face down,
1331
00:53:31,469 --> 00:53:32,905
my face buried in the back.
1332
00:53:33,079 --> 00:53:34,820
Do you honestly think
I'd have sex with someone
1333
00:53:34,994 --> 00:53:37,301
who is unconscious,
with someone I loved?
1334
00:53:37,866 --> 00:53:40,304
- I mean, you did.
- No. No,
1335
00:53:40,478 --> 00:53:43,307
there were steps along the--
I stopped.
1336
00:53:43,481 --> 00:53:46,310
I stopped and checked
to make sure you were into it.
1337
00:53:46,484 --> 00:53:51,271
I lifted up a mask, the goat
mask thing, and I kissed you
1338
00:53:51,445 --> 00:53:53,839
and I said, I have--
I said, I have protection.
1339
00:53:54,013 --> 00:53:55,362
I said the words--
1340
00:53:55,536 --> 00:53:57,234
"I have protection"
could mean I have a gun.
1341
00:53:57,408 --> 00:53:58,539
"I have protection"
doesn't necessarily mean
1342
00:53:58,713 --> 00:53:59,888
I have a condom.
1343
00:54:00,062 --> 00:54:01,325
[Calvin] Standard
interpretations.
1344
00:54:01,934 --> 00:54:03,631
Of course it means
I have a condom.
1345
00:54:03,805 --> 00:54:06,199
"I have protection" is totally
synonymous with I have a condom,
1346
00:54:06,373 --> 00:54:08,245
which is what I said to you
1347
00:54:08,419 --> 00:54:10,638
and you said the words, "Okay,"
which I took as an indication--
1348
00:54:10,812 --> 00:54:12,466
- Even if I did,
- Which you did.
1349
00:54:12,640 --> 00:54:14,468
Even if I did,
"Okay" can be interpreted
1350
00:54:14,642 --> 00:54:16,688
in a wide variety
of different ways.
1351
00:54:16,862 --> 00:54:18,385
Again, standard interpretation.
1352
00:54:18,559 --> 00:54:21,127
Standard usage of "Okay"
would be approval or assent.
1353
00:54:21,301 --> 00:54:23,347
I mean, right?
1354
00:54:23,521 --> 00:54:25,087
I mean, am I crazy?
1355
00:54:25,262 --> 00:54:26,872
Besides, how could
you hear anything?
1356
00:54:27,481 --> 00:54:30,092
The party was so loud,
the music.
1357
00:54:30,571 --> 00:54:32,356
Isn't it possible
that maybe you think you heard
1358
00:54:32,530 --> 00:54:34,227
me mumble the words,
"Okay," when I--
1359
00:54:34,401 --> 00:54:35,881
I was really
trying to say, "Go away?"
1360
00:54:36,055 --> 00:54:37,317
You laughed.
1361
00:54:39,363 --> 00:54:42,888
We were laughing because
I couldn't get the condom on.
1362
00:54:44,411 --> 00:54:46,979
I had to open a new one.
It made us laugh.
1363
00:54:47,153 --> 00:54:49,590
I was laughing,
you were laughing. Which--
1364
00:54:49,764 --> 00:54:51,070
How could you be laughing
if you're unconscious?
1365
00:54:51,244 --> 00:54:52,985
Was I laughing
or was I crying?
1366
00:54:53,159 --> 00:54:54,595
[Calvin] It was slow,
1367
00:54:54,769 --> 00:54:57,163
it was gentle,
1368
00:54:57,337 --> 00:54:58,599
I was careful not to--
1369
00:55:00,166 --> 00:55:02,864
I put myself
inside you from behind.
1370
00:55:03,648 --> 00:55:05,127
It wasn't, like, a sneak attack.
1371
00:55:05,302 --> 00:55:07,434
It was only after you had
signaled, or indicated,
1372
00:55:07,608 --> 00:55:10,002
or generally hinted at
approval. It wasn't rough,
1373
00:55:10,481 --> 00:55:14,311
it wasn't forcible,
it wasn't one sided.
1374
00:55:14,485 --> 00:55:16,530
- You were making noises.
- Noises?
1375
00:55:16,704 --> 00:55:18,271
Noises, noises, noises?
1376
00:55:18,445 --> 00:55:20,360
Yes, you were making noises.
Noises like you liked it.
1377
00:55:20,534 --> 00:55:22,971
I'm not making this up,
I swear.
1378
00:55:23,145 --> 00:55:25,191
I heard you make noises.
1379
00:55:25,931 --> 00:55:27,672
Is it-- No, I--
1380
00:55:27,846 --> 00:55:30,065
is it possible you were
not exactly with it
1381
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:32,894
and drifting in and out
of consciousness? Maybe.
1382
00:55:33,939 --> 00:55:35,723
Is it possible you fell
asleep during the deed
1383
00:55:35,897 --> 00:55:37,246
and I didn't notice
1384
00:55:37,421 --> 00:55:38,813
because your face
was face down on the bed
1385
00:55:38,987 --> 00:55:40,641
and your hair
was covering your face
1386
00:55:40,815 --> 00:55:43,122
and I was wearing that mask
with, like, severely limited
1387
00:55:43,296 --> 00:55:46,647
visibility, so maybe I wasn't
reading the nuances,
1388
00:55:46,821 --> 00:55:49,215
the subtlety of your facial--
I don't know--
1389
00:55:49,389 --> 00:55:50,956
Just expressions?
1390
00:55:53,741 --> 00:55:56,527
Maybe. Maybe.
1391
00:55:58,093 --> 00:55:59,791
I don't know.
I don't know.
1392
00:56:02,533 --> 00:56:04,186
All I know
is I would never,
1393
00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:05,623
ever consciously hurt you.
1394
00:56:07,668 --> 00:56:08,930
It just--
1395
00:56:12,760 --> 00:56:13,979
Happened really fast.
1396
00:56:15,241 --> 00:56:16,547
So fast.
1397
00:56:17,286 --> 00:56:20,246
We just got carried away
and things got out of hand
1398
00:56:20,420 --> 00:56:24,468
and I really regret
that I-- That we did not have
1399
00:56:24,642 --> 00:56:27,471
the wherewithal, the judgment
to stop this whole thing
1400
00:56:27,645 --> 00:56:28,907
before it got started.
1401
00:56:31,039 --> 00:56:32,954
Two drunk college kids,
naked on a bed.
1402
00:56:34,347 --> 00:56:37,045
What's going to happen?
Something good?
1403
00:56:37,959 --> 00:56:39,221
Things are going to get messy.
1404
00:56:40,135 --> 00:56:42,094
Things are bound to be subject
to interpretation.
1405
00:56:42,268 --> 00:56:45,706
I admit my interpretation could
be just as faulty as yours.
1406
00:56:46,185 --> 00:56:47,447
It's been a long time.
1407
00:56:48,492 --> 00:56:52,409
Geez it's-- it's a real long
time for me to sit here and say
1408
00:56:52,583 --> 00:56:54,802
I have the definitive,
dispositive play-by-play
1409
00:56:54,976 --> 00:56:57,718
replay is not-- [exhaling]
1410
00:57:00,939 --> 00:57:04,682
I can't do that.
Neither can you.
1411
00:57:04,856 --> 00:57:07,293
Neither of us can say
with complete certainty.
1412
00:57:07,467 --> 00:57:09,121
All I can say is--
1413
00:57:09,295 --> 00:57:11,428
All I can ask is
what's more likely?
1414
00:57:11,602 --> 00:57:13,081
That I'm some pathological
sexual offender?
1415
00:57:13,255 --> 00:57:15,780
Or that I was
too intoxicated myself
1416
00:57:15,954 --> 00:57:17,912
to tell how intoxicated
you were?
1417
00:57:18,086 --> 00:57:19,653
To appropriately
interpret your consent.
1418
00:57:19,827 --> 00:57:21,089
I didn't consent.
1419
00:57:22,439 --> 00:57:23,701
Legally speaking.
1420
00:57:26,051 --> 00:57:27,356
Legally.
1421
00:57:29,271 --> 00:57:32,100
Are we talking
about legality now?
1422
00:57:33,450 --> 00:57:36,235
Because legally speaking,
something like this--
1423
00:57:37,628 --> 00:57:39,717
Something that happened
this long ago,
1424
00:57:41,414 --> 00:57:42,676
it's very hard to prove.
1425
00:57:44,286 --> 00:57:46,985
It's very expensive. Lawyers.
1426
00:57:47,159 --> 00:57:48,595
[Rachel] Maybe you could
loan me one of yours.
1427
00:57:49,901 --> 00:57:52,425
I'm sure you have
the best lawyers money can buy.
1428
00:57:52,599 --> 00:57:54,122
I do, actually.
1429
00:57:56,037 --> 00:57:57,604
[Rachel] Conflict of interest,
I suppose.
1430
00:57:57,778 --> 00:57:59,388
Our state is one
of the states that has
1431
00:57:59,563 --> 00:58:00,955
a statute of limitations,
1432
00:58:02,000 --> 00:58:04,002
a limit on how long
you have to press charges.
1433
00:58:05,307 --> 00:58:06,570
[Rachel] Ooh.
1434
00:58:07,309 --> 00:58:09,660
Did you, like, look it up?
1435
00:58:14,316 --> 00:58:15,535
So did I.
1436
00:58:16,710 --> 00:58:18,190
The statute only
applies to adults,
1437
00:58:18,364 --> 00:58:19,713
adult victims.
1438
00:58:19,887 --> 00:58:21,976
You were a Junior,
I was a freshman.
1439
00:58:22,150 --> 00:58:24,501
You were 19, I was 17.
1440
00:58:26,633 --> 00:58:32,334
I was a minor. Legally speaking,
it was statutory.
1441
00:58:32,509 --> 00:58:33,945
Legally speaking.
1442
00:58:36,251 --> 00:58:38,340
it's a felony to fuck a child.
1443
00:58:39,254 --> 00:58:41,518
The statute of limitations
doesn't apply.
1444
00:58:44,651 --> 00:58:45,913
Oh, God.
1445
00:58:47,567 --> 00:58:49,526
What would happen
to a guy like you in prison?
1446
00:58:50,831 --> 00:58:52,659
What would happen
in the shower?
1447
00:58:54,487 --> 00:58:59,144
You're tight, white ass would
get creamed on a weekly basis.
1448
00:58:59,927 --> 00:59:05,237
Then, and only then, will you
feel a sliver of what I felt.
1449
00:59:05,411 --> 00:59:07,631
Then, and only then,
1450
00:59:07,805 --> 00:59:10,851
with a cock in your rectum,
will you know what it's like
1451
00:59:11,025 --> 00:59:12,331
to be violated.
1452
00:59:15,639 --> 00:59:18,946
Whatever you do,
do not drop the soap.
1453
00:59:26,040 --> 00:59:29,261
[laughing]
1454
00:59:30,915 --> 00:59:32,220
[through laughter] Okay, sorry.
1455
00:59:32,394 --> 00:59:34,527
Oh, my gosh.
Your face.
1456
00:59:34,701 --> 00:59:38,792
I'm fucking with you, Cal.
I'm not going to press charges.
1457
00:59:38,966 --> 00:59:40,794
- [sniffing]
- [chuckling]
1458
00:59:42,143 --> 00:59:43,623
Aw.
1459
00:59:43,797 --> 00:59:46,495
I'm glad you said that, Rachel.
That's a relief.
1460
00:59:46,670 --> 00:59:49,063
I'm relieved.
1461
00:59:49,237 --> 00:59:50,369
An innocent man
should want to clear
1462
00:59:50,543 --> 00:59:51,936
his name in a court of law.
1463
00:59:52,110 --> 00:59:53,590
[Calvin] Innocent men
don't exist anymore.
1464
00:59:53,764 --> 00:59:55,243
Boo hoo!
1465
00:59:55,896 --> 00:59:58,072
I think we can settle
this out of court.
1466
00:59:58,246 --> 01:00:00,466
I think we can-- I think
we can reach a settlement.
1467
01:00:00,640 --> 01:00:03,121
Yes. Let's settle
this once and for all.
1468
01:00:03,774 --> 01:00:05,558
Neither one of us
wants to drag this out.
1469
01:00:06,080 --> 01:00:07,952
I want you
to walk away feeling--
1470
01:00:08,126 --> 01:00:09,780
Having felt that I understood
where you were coming from.
1471
01:00:09,954 --> 01:00:11,651
You don't understand,
but you will.
1472
01:00:11,825 --> 01:00:13,348
[Calvin] As long as you
understand that I maintain my--
1473
01:00:13,522 --> 01:00:16,308
I still respectfully disagree
with your interpretation
1474
01:00:16,482 --> 01:00:17,831
of the--
1475
01:00:19,964 --> 01:00:22,923
Maybe we can agree to disagree?
1476
01:00:23,097 --> 01:00:25,230
Maybe we can say something
went wrong that night.
1477
01:00:25,404 --> 01:00:27,885
We made the wrong choices,
the wrong decisions,
1478
01:00:28,059 --> 01:00:29,626
but it's time to make it right.
1479
01:00:29,800 --> 01:00:32,324
I want to make it right.
I want to help you.
1480
01:00:32,498 --> 01:00:34,021
You think I need help?
1481
01:00:34,195 --> 01:00:36,110
Substance abuse is
a serious issue.
1482
01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:38,635
Mental health is not
a priority in this country.
1483
01:00:38,809 --> 01:00:40,288
I can get you help.
1484
01:00:40,462 --> 01:00:41,986
The best therapists,
the best facilities.
1485
01:00:42,160 --> 01:00:44,118
You wanted to l--
you want to ship me away?
1486
01:00:44,771 --> 01:00:46,425
Lock me in the loony bin?
1487
01:00:46,599 --> 01:00:48,427
I spent some time in the
loony bin, not super helpful.
1488
01:00:48,601 --> 01:00:50,342
I'm not talking
about loony bins,
1489
01:00:50,864 --> 01:00:52,344
I'm talking about a place,
1490
01:00:53,084 --> 01:00:56,130
a high end place
to help you get clean,
1491
01:00:56,304 --> 01:00:58,655
get on your feet again.
All expenses paid.
1492
01:00:58,829 --> 01:01:00,526
I'll have my assistant put
together a list of facilities.
1493
01:01:00,700 --> 01:01:02,267
Money doesn't matter to me,
1494
01:01:02,441 --> 01:01:04,182
what matters is
your wellbeing--
1495
01:01:04,356 --> 01:01:06,401
The only thing that matters
to you is getting rid of me,
1496
01:01:06,575 --> 01:01:08,490
getting me to shut my mouth.
1497
01:01:08,665 --> 01:01:10,667
[Calvin] No, I'm trying to help
you get things back on track.
1498
01:01:10,841 --> 01:01:13,191
I have access to-- it's easy
for me to arrange a few--
1499
01:01:17,021 --> 01:01:18,892
What are the things that
would be useful to you?
1500
01:01:20,111 --> 01:01:21,982
Name the things.
You need a car?
1501
01:01:22,679 --> 01:01:24,419
- A job?
- Hm.
1502
01:01:24,593 --> 01:01:25,986
A down payment
on an apartment?
1503
01:01:26,160 --> 01:01:27,901
- [Rachel] Wow.
- Fifty grand.
1504
01:01:29,120 --> 01:01:31,426
I'll Venmo you 50 grand.
Right here, right now.
1505
01:01:32,079 --> 01:01:34,342
Start your own theater company.
Put on your own plays.
1506
01:01:34,516 --> 01:01:36,344
It's not a handout,
it's an investment.
1507
01:01:36,518 --> 01:01:39,652
I'm taking a financial interest
in you, in your future.
1508
01:01:41,262 --> 01:01:44,526
Ugh. I'm more interested
in the past.
1509
01:01:44,701 --> 01:01:46,180
[Calvin] Seventy-five!
Seventy-five!
1510
01:01:46,354 --> 01:01:47,791
You can walk out
of this bar with 75k.
1511
01:01:47,965 --> 01:01:49,618
What's that saying
about prostitutes?
1512
01:01:49,793 --> 01:01:51,664
You don't pay them for sex,
you pay them to leave?
1513
01:01:51,838 --> 01:01:53,622
- That's not what this is.
- A million.
1514
01:02:02,327 --> 01:02:03,807
A million.
1515
01:02:03,981 --> 01:02:05,243
I know your net worth,
1516
01:02:06,940 --> 01:02:08,768
and I know you're worth
a lot more than that.
1517
01:02:08,942 --> 01:02:11,597
The question is,
what is it worth to you?
1518
01:02:18,604 --> 01:02:21,433
- Hmm?
- I have the money.
1519
01:02:22,608 --> 01:02:24,436
I can get you the--
1520
01:02:26,351 --> 01:02:28,527
[sighing]
The money is not the issue.
1521
01:02:29,528 --> 01:02:31,269
The issue is by saying
okay to the money,
1522
01:02:31,443 --> 01:02:33,706
I'm saying essentially
that I did it.
1523
01:02:35,186 --> 01:02:36,491
[Rachel] And?
1524
01:02:37,362 --> 01:02:39,756
And I didn't.
1525
01:02:44,891 --> 01:02:46,153
Fucking with you, Cal.
1526
01:02:47,067 --> 01:02:49,417
[scoffing]
I don't want your money.
1527
01:02:49,591 --> 01:02:51,593
- You don't want my money?
- I don't want your money.
1528
01:02:51,768 --> 01:02:53,378
[Calvin] Can you tell me
what you do want?
1529
01:02:55,684 --> 01:02:57,686
[door opening]
1530
01:02:59,340 --> 01:03:01,734
[people chattering]
1531
01:03:01,908 --> 01:03:04,171
Can we talk about
this in private?
1532
01:03:08,349 --> 01:03:09,481
Privacy.
1533
01:03:10,482 --> 01:03:11,657
Yes.
1534
01:03:12,832 --> 01:03:14,834
Discretion, of course.
1535
01:03:16,357 --> 01:03:18,882
Why don't we, uh, yeah.
1536
01:03:19,056 --> 01:03:20,927
Why don't we get the check
and get out of here?
1537
01:03:26,063 --> 01:03:27,891
Why don't we go back
to your room?
1538
01:03:37,596 --> 01:03:40,425
[tense piano notes]
1539
01:04:11,543 --> 01:04:13,458
[door opening]
1540
01:04:39,658 --> 01:04:40,833
I'm a married man.
1541
01:04:43,705 --> 01:04:45,620
The majority of men
can't keep it in their pants.
1542
01:04:45,794 --> 01:04:46,883
They did a study.
1543
01:04:48,362 --> 01:04:49,886
[Calvin exhaling]
1544
01:04:52,584 --> 01:04:54,368
I've never cheated on my wife.
1545
01:04:55,848 --> 01:04:57,241
I've never cheated
on my husband.
1546
01:04:59,460 --> 01:05:00,679
Do you actually have
a husband?
1547
01:05:00,853 --> 01:05:04,030
Do you actually care about me?
1548
01:05:04,204 --> 01:05:06,119
Okay, okay. Can we--
1549
01:05:06,293 --> 01:05:08,948
can we stop playing games,
if at all possible?
1550
01:05:09,122 --> 01:05:10,907
It's all fun and games until
someone gets hurt.
1551
01:05:13,083 --> 01:05:14,345
Do you want to hurt me, Cal?
1552
01:05:16,477 --> 01:05:18,088
I want a drink.
1553
01:05:19,350 --> 01:05:20,568
I could use a drink.
1554
01:05:24,485 --> 01:05:26,748
Didn't you just tell me
you just get out of rehab?
1555
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:29,795
Do you believe everything
everybody tells you?
1556
01:05:31,710 --> 01:05:33,451
Please tell me
there's a mini bar.
1557
01:05:34,278 --> 01:05:36,802
Where is the mini bar?
1558
01:05:40,066 --> 01:05:41,285
[bottles clinking]
1559
01:06:07,137 --> 01:06:10,836
Whiskey, for, uh,
old times' sake. Yeah?
1560
01:06:25,242 --> 01:06:27,113
That'll take the edge off,
right?
1561
01:06:28,593 --> 01:06:29,898
You gotta relax, Cal.
1562
01:06:31,291 --> 01:06:34,686
There's no reason this
can't be, um, fun, right?
1563
01:06:34,860 --> 01:06:37,906
We can make this kind
of romantic.
1564
01:06:39,430 --> 01:06:41,736
Hey, do you mind if I play
some music? That would be--
1565
01:06:42,520 --> 01:06:45,088
Oh, yes. Your screen's locked.
What's your--
1566
01:06:45,262 --> 01:06:49,005
want to punch in your
little, um, code thingy?
1567
01:06:53,444 --> 01:06:55,185
[exhaling]
1568
01:07:00,407 --> 01:07:03,106
[key clacking softly]
1569
01:07:07,458 --> 01:07:11,636
[Rachel whistling, humming]
1570
01:07:13,246 --> 01:07:16,162
[upbeat music]
1571
01:07:16,336 --> 01:07:17,990
Do you want to dance?
1572
01:07:18,947 --> 01:07:20,297
[Calvin] I don't.
1573
01:07:22,603 --> 01:07:24,388
Come on. Dance with me, Cal.
1574
01:07:38,010 --> 01:07:40,882
[laughing] You were
never a very good dancer.
1575
01:07:42,014 --> 01:07:43,581
Nope.
1576
01:07:44,538 --> 01:07:45,713
You were always too uptight.
1577
01:07:46,888 --> 01:07:48,412
Yeah.
1578
01:07:49,021 --> 01:07:50,631
You need to loosen up, Cal.
1579
01:07:51,371 --> 01:07:53,112
Just let it all hang loose.
1580
01:08:12,436 --> 01:08:13,915
We had a good thing, Cal.
1581
01:08:15,569 --> 01:08:17,354
Do you remember
how good our thing was?
1582
01:08:20,313 --> 01:08:21,532
[Calvin] Yes.
1583
01:08:26,363 --> 01:08:28,582
Do you remember
how good it felt?
1584
01:08:29,105 --> 01:08:30,497
To feel me?
1585
01:08:33,152 --> 01:08:35,676
- Yes
- Yeah?
1586
01:08:43,119 --> 01:08:44,903
Thought you said
no hard feelings.
1587
01:08:45,077 --> 01:08:46,948
- [Calvin moaning]
- You feel pretty hard to me.
1588
01:08:47,123 --> 01:08:49,342
[Calvin groaning]
Okay, okay, okay.
1589
01:08:49,516 --> 01:08:51,692
All right.
This is getting weird.
1590
01:08:53,781 --> 01:08:56,610
[moaning] Speaking of weird...
1591
01:09:29,730 --> 01:09:31,036
Rachel?
1592
01:09:31,689 --> 01:09:33,473
Oh, do you want
to put on a play?
1593
01:09:33,647 --> 01:09:35,910
A little, uh,
a little reenactment.
1594
01:09:36,084 --> 01:09:37,608
A little performance art?
1595
01:09:38,565 --> 01:09:41,046
Don't be shy, just
do what she did that night.
1596
01:09:42,003 --> 01:09:44,919
I'll play me, you'll pay you.
Okey dokey?
1597
01:09:45,093 --> 01:09:46,399
Act one, scene one.
1598
01:09:46,573 --> 01:09:48,401
I'm laying like this,
face down.
1599
01:09:48,575 --> 01:09:51,099
- Helpless, lifeless.
- I don't want to do this.
1600
01:09:51,274 --> 01:09:52,753
Do what you did and do me,
Cal.
1601
01:09:52,927 --> 01:09:55,321
- Rachel, no. No.
- Do it!
1602
01:09:55,495 --> 01:09:59,195
[exhaling] Oh, I'm sorry, am
I'm making you uncomfortable?
1603
01:09:59,369 --> 01:10:01,632
I-- I just got to ask
you to leave.
1604
01:10:03,721 --> 01:10:05,157
Oh, I'm not going anywhere.
1605
01:10:06,114 --> 01:10:08,204
You can kick me out,
but I'll, uh--
1606
01:10:09,205 --> 01:10:11,032
I just keep coming back.
1607
01:10:11,207 --> 01:10:12,599
I'll just keep showing up.
1608
01:10:12,773 --> 01:10:14,775
Uh, at the gym,
at the grocery store,
1609
01:10:14,949 --> 01:10:16,255
at soccer games
on Saturday morning.
1610
01:10:16,429 --> 01:10:17,952
Maybe I'll swing by
1611
01:10:18,126 --> 01:10:20,477
the McMansion, 121 Artesian
Street, right?
1612
01:10:20,651 --> 01:10:22,043
Maybe your wife
can give me a tour.
1613
01:10:22,218 --> 01:10:23,436
Leave my wife out of this.
1614
01:10:25,133 --> 01:10:27,353
- Do you think, um--
- [woman moaning on laptop]
1615
01:10:27,527 --> 01:10:28,963
Sara would leave you
1616
01:10:29,137 --> 01:10:30,965
if she found out
what kind of porn you like?
1617
01:10:31,792 --> 01:10:33,490
Gotta clear that
browser history, bro.
1618
01:10:33,664 --> 01:10:35,840
- Give me the--
- Porn like this?
1619
01:10:36,014 --> 01:10:37,711
You don't want to leave
this lying around the house.
1620
01:10:37,885 --> 01:10:39,322
Your daughters
might be disgusted
1621
01:10:39,496 --> 01:10:41,585
- by Daddy's viewing habits.
- Give me the--
1622
01:10:41,759 --> 01:10:43,108
You like to watch
the rough stuff, huh?
1623
01:10:43,282 --> 01:10:44,718
This girl's got a gag
in her mouth.
1624
01:10:44,892 --> 01:10:48,113
Handcuffs?
This is hardcore, Cal.
1625
01:10:48,287 --> 01:10:50,724
- This is barely legal.
- Give me the computer!
1626
01:10:53,161 --> 01:10:55,468
Thought you didn't like porn.
Thought you weren't a porn guy.
1627
01:10:55,642 --> 01:10:56,817
When I'm traveling.
1628
01:10:57,644 --> 01:10:59,385
When I'm away on business.
Every guy likes to watch--
1629
01:10:59,559 --> 01:11:02,388
This isn't even porn.
This isn't a porn star,
1630
01:11:02,562 --> 01:11:05,435
this just some girl in some
basement being bound
1631
01:11:05,609 --> 01:11:07,872
and gagged and violated
against her will.
1632
01:11:08,046 --> 01:11:09,700
This is some sick shit, Cal.
1633
01:11:09,874 --> 01:11:11,702
Okay, you know what?
I think I've had enough.
1634
01:11:11,876 --> 01:11:14,095
I think I've been more than
willing to-- up to this point,
1635
01:11:14,270 --> 01:11:16,010
I've really tried my best
to accommodate you.
1636
01:11:16,184 --> 01:11:17,708
- Accommodate me?
- But really, I mean,
1637
01:11:17,882 --> 01:11:19,275
at some point, like,
enough is enough.
1638
01:11:19,449 --> 01:11:20,841
At some point,
you've convinced yourself
1639
01:11:21,015 --> 01:11:22,539
you have some kind of
leverage over me.
1640
01:11:22,713 --> 01:11:24,367
Enough leverage to extort me,
to threaten me,
1641
01:11:24,541 --> 01:11:26,020
to make threats that you're
somehow going to destroy
1642
01:11:26,194 --> 01:11:27,631
my life because you think
I destroyed yours?
1643
01:11:27,805 --> 01:11:29,067
Well, think again.
You can't blackmail me,
1644
01:11:29,241 --> 01:11:30,851
you can't get me to capitulate.
1645
01:11:31,025 --> 01:11:33,201
You are not negotiating
from a position of power.
1646
01:11:33,376 --> 01:11:35,029
All right? Trust me,
I've been on the winning end
1647
01:11:35,203 --> 01:11:36,553
of a lot of negotiations.
1648
01:11:36,727 --> 01:11:38,598
I've been in rooms,
in arbitration,
1649
01:11:38,772 --> 01:11:40,339
arbitrating equity on a level
way beyond your comprehension.
1650
01:11:40,513 --> 01:11:42,515
There's a time to broker
a deal, and there's a time
1651
01:11:42,689 --> 01:11:44,517
to walk away from the table,
and I'm telling you, Rachel,
1652
01:11:44,691 --> 01:11:46,214
it's time for you to find
the closest exit
1653
01:11:46,389 --> 01:11:47,738
before I call my counsel,
1654
01:11:47,912 --> 01:11:49,522
which is not one person,
it's many people,
1655
01:11:49,696 --> 01:11:52,003
and they will ring you out,
Rachel.
1656
01:11:52,177 --> 01:11:53,744
They will hang you out to dry.
1657
01:11:53,918 --> 01:11:55,702
They will simply dismantle
you piece by piece.
1658
01:11:55,876 --> 01:11:57,051
They will take you apart.
1659
01:11:57,225 --> 01:11:59,880
I mean, who are you, really?
1660
01:12:00,054 --> 01:12:02,100
Who is Rachel Lerner?
A college dropout?
1661
01:12:02,274 --> 01:12:04,885
A drug addict? A junkie
who's been in and out of rehab,
1662
01:12:05,059 --> 01:12:06,496
a part-time prostitute?
1663
01:12:06,670 --> 01:12:08,062
somebody who, I'm assuming,
sucked some dick
1664
01:12:08,236 --> 01:12:10,064
for money at some point
in her life.
1665
01:12:10,238 --> 01:12:12,763
I'm sensing some credibility
issues, some character issues.
1666
01:12:12,937 --> 01:12:14,417
You see, you don't
have a hand to play
1667
01:12:14,591 --> 01:12:15,940
because you don't have
any proof.
1668
01:12:16,114 --> 01:12:18,116
Go tell everyone
what you think I did. Go!
1669
01:12:18,290 --> 01:12:19,987
No one will believe you. Why?
1670
01:12:20,161 --> 01:12:21,772
Because you're you, and I'm me.
1671
01:12:21,946 --> 01:12:24,383
Who are you? I mean, really.
1672
01:12:24,557 --> 01:12:25,950
[clapping] Who is Calvin Green?
1673
01:12:26,124 --> 01:12:29,040
We're done doing this.
We're done.
1674
01:12:30,171 --> 01:12:31,825
I can't prove a negative.
1675
01:12:31,999 --> 01:12:35,351
It's an impossible-- it's
an epistemological problem.
1676
01:12:35,525 --> 01:12:38,658
It's a semantic dispute.
I'm saying I didn't do it.
1677
01:12:38,832 --> 01:12:41,052
You're saying I did.
What's the definition of did,
1678
01:12:41,226 --> 01:12:43,446
- what's the definition of it?
- You know what you did.
1679
01:12:43,620 --> 01:12:46,057
What do I have to do to get
you to walk out that door?
1680
01:12:46,231 --> 01:12:47,798
I'm ready to walk
out that door.
1681
01:12:47,972 --> 01:12:49,713
I'm ready to close that door
behind me, forever.
1682
01:12:49,887 --> 01:12:51,192
If?
1683
01:12:51,367 --> 01:12:53,456
If you do something for me,
first.
1684
01:12:54,239 --> 01:12:56,067
- Name it.
- You're not going to like it.
1685
01:12:56,241 --> 01:12:57,764
A million was just
the opening bid.
1686
01:12:57,938 --> 01:12:59,505
The bid is in your
court to counter.
1687
01:12:59,679 --> 01:13:01,377
Here's my offer.
1688
01:13:01,551 --> 01:13:03,291
It won't be easy,
it won't be fun.
1689
01:13:03,466 --> 01:13:05,598
But once you do it,
I promise this whole ordeal
1690
01:13:05,772 --> 01:13:07,687
will be over and you
will never see me again.
1691
01:13:07,861 --> 01:13:10,647
Tell me what to do,
tell me what you need.
1692
01:13:11,299 --> 01:13:12,779
The truth.
1693
01:13:12,953 --> 01:13:15,303
I've been telling you
the truth all day.
1694
01:13:15,478 --> 01:13:17,262
The truth, as I remember it.
1695
01:13:17,436 --> 01:13:19,133
- [Rachel] Tell me the truth.
- There's not one--
1696
01:13:19,307 --> 01:13:22,006
there's no definitive-- there's
no Archimedes point here.
1697
01:13:22,180 --> 01:13:24,312
- Tell me the truth!
- Whose truth is that, Rachel?
1698
01:13:24,487 --> 01:13:26,314
What truth?
1699
01:13:26,489 --> 01:13:28,534
You want me to just tell you
what I think really happened?
1700
01:13:28,708 --> 01:13:30,841
Or you want me to tell you
what you want to hear?
1701
01:13:31,015 --> 01:13:33,234
- Tell me the truth!
- Okay, okay, fine. Okay, fine.
1702
01:13:33,409 --> 01:13:35,585
Here's the--
here's the truth, Rachel.
1703
01:13:35,759 --> 01:13:38,283
The truth, according to you,
here's your version of events.
1704
01:13:38,457 --> 01:13:40,067
Here's what you want me to say.
1705
01:13:40,241 --> 01:13:42,069
You want me
to--what? Incriminate myself?
1706
01:13:42,243 --> 01:13:44,724
Throw myself under the bus?
Demonize myself?
1707
01:13:44,898 --> 01:13:46,900
Fine. Fine. Okay. I'm a demon.
1708
01:13:47,074 --> 01:13:49,207
I'm a demon! I'm a demon.
1709
01:13:49,381 --> 01:13:52,776
But you are a cock tease.
1710
01:13:53,298 --> 01:13:56,475
That's the truth. The truth
is six months we dated,
1711
01:13:56,649 --> 01:13:58,695
six months--
and we never had sex.
1712
01:13:58,869 --> 01:14:00,305
Even though you fucked
your fair share
1713
01:14:00,479 --> 01:14:02,002
of the student population,
1714
01:14:02,176 --> 01:14:03,743
even though you fucked
all these random guys.
1715
01:14:03,917 --> 01:14:05,092
God forbid you meet a good guy
1716
01:14:05,266 --> 01:14:06,703
who actually cared about you.
1717
01:14:06,877 --> 01:14:09,488
A nice guy who goes out
on a limb,
1718
01:14:09,662 --> 01:14:11,751
tells you
he actually loves you.
1719
01:14:11,925 --> 01:14:14,058
With that guy
you want to go slow,
1720
01:14:14,232 --> 01:14:15,929
you don't want to go
all the way.
1721
01:14:16,103 --> 01:14:18,584
You wanna go slow, like
you're-- like you're suddenly
1722
01:14:18,758 --> 01:14:20,847
this squeaky clean
little schoolgirl.
1723
01:14:21,021 --> 01:14:22,806
- Suddenly, this virgin--
- I was.
1724
01:14:22,980 --> 01:14:25,852
Bullshit!
There I was-- there I was.
1725
01:14:26,026 --> 01:14:27,811
I remember--
I remember it so vividly.
1726
01:14:27,985 --> 01:14:29,856
There I was at the party,
telling you I loved you.
1727
01:14:30,030 --> 01:14:31,858
I was telling you I loved you,
spilling my guts out.
1728
01:14:32,032 --> 01:14:33,643
But you didn't tell me
you loved me back.
1729
01:14:33,817 --> 01:14:35,253
You told me to get you
another drink.
1730
01:14:35,427 --> 01:14:36,950
You seem to think
I drugged that drink.
1731
01:14:37,124 --> 01:14:39,083
You seem convinced that
I slipped you something.
1732
01:14:39,257 --> 01:14:41,694
So let's just say, okay, fine.
Fine, Rachel. You win.
1733
01:14:41,868 --> 01:14:44,001
I slipped you something,
I spiked it.
1734
01:14:44,175 --> 01:14:45,959
I spiked that shit.
I spiked it.
1735
01:14:46,133 --> 01:14:48,962
For the sake of the argument,
let's just say I spiked it.
1736
01:14:49,136 --> 01:14:51,138
Let's just say
I had every intention
1737
01:14:51,312 --> 01:14:53,445
to have my way with you.
My intentions were not good,
1738
01:14:53,619 --> 01:14:55,578
and I'm not a good guy.
I'm just a total animal.
1739
01:14:55,752 --> 01:14:57,536
I'm a total fucking monster.
From your point of view,
1740
01:14:57,710 --> 01:14:59,495
I'm just a total fucking prick,
a fucking monster-- fuck,
1741
01:14:59,669 --> 01:15:03,281
an apex predator of pussy.
I'm a sick fuck.
1742
01:15:03,455 --> 01:15:05,501
You're so right about me,
Rachel. You're so right.
1743
01:15:05,675 --> 01:15:07,633
And it wasn't just you,
you were just the start.
1744
01:15:07,807 --> 01:15:09,374
You were just the beginning.
1745
01:15:09,548 --> 01:15:11,463
When I was going to grad
school, when I was getting
1746
01:15:11,637 --> 01:15:13,596
my MBA, I'd get in my car
and I drive over
1747
01:15:13,770 --> 01:15:15,598
to the shitty part of Philly,
the part with the prostitutes,
1748
01:15:15,772 --> 01:15:17,425
and I'd pick up these
prostitutes, yeah, every one,
1749
01:15:17,600 --> 01:15:19,993
and I'd just pick 'em up.
I pick 'em up and some of them
1750
01:15:20,167 --> 01:15:21,952
will actually let you
t-- tie them up and shit,
1751
01:15:22,126 --> 01:15:24,041
some of them will actually let
you strangle them for, like,
1752
01:15:24,215 --> 01:15:26,130
not that much money for, like,
you know, basically like $27.
1753
01:15:26,304 --> 01:15:28,654
You basically almost--
you choke a sex worker
1754
01:15:28,828 --> 01:15:30,264
in the backseat of your Prius.
1755
01:15:30,438 --> 01:15:32,049
How sick and twisted is that?
1756
01:15:32,223 --> 01:15:34,268
But hey, that's me, right?
Sick puppy.
1757
01:15:34,312 --> 01:15:36,575
Ooh, take this au pair.
Au pair,this 19-year-old
1758
01:15:36,749 --> 01:15:38,925
au pair from Belarus,
or wherever the fuck.
1759
01:15:39,099 --> 01:15:41,188
Day one, she's flirting
with me in front of my wife.
1760
01:15:41,362 --> 01:15:43,495
Like, pretty overt flirting.
Like, touching my arm,
1761
01:15:43,669 --> 01:15:45,715
like, laughing too hard
at all my jokes.
1762
01:15:45,889 --> 01:15:49,153
My wife was like, my wife was
like, this is getting weird!
1763
01:15:49,327 --> 01:15:52,460
I tried to discourage it,
I-- I tried playing it down,
1764
01:15:52,635 --> 01:15:55,115
The au pair
couldn't get the hint.
1765
01:15:55,289 --> 01:15:57,640
Finally, one night,
late at night,
1766
01:15:57,814 --> 01:15:59,467
I, uh, I had to go
into the guest house,
1767
01:15:59,642 --> 01:16:01,208
and I guess
I took her by surprise,
1768
01:16:01,382 --> 01:16:02,949
because she starts
hitting me and biting me
1769
01:16:03,123 --> 01:16:04,908
to the point where I had
actually put a pillowcase
1770
01:16:05,082 --> 01:16:06,736
over her head
so she would calm down.
1771
01:16:06,910 --> 01:16:09,695
My dick was so far up
her ass until she realized
1772
01:16:09,869 --> 01:16:12,089
the more she moved,
the more hurt.
1773
01:16:12,263 --> 01:16:13,394
She got the message
loud and clear,
1774
01:16:13,569 --> 01:16:15,440
because the next day at dinner,
1775
01:16:15,614 --> 01:16:17,137
she's the most professional
au pair in the world.
1776
01:16:17,311 --> 01:16:19,270
No more flirting, no more
laughing at all my jokes.
1777
01:16:19,444 --> 01:16:21,011
I guess she didn't find me
funny anymore.
1778
01:16:21,185 --> 01:16:23,970
Oh, and my assistant-- 22,
smoking hot. Right?
1779
01:16:24,144 --> 01:16:25,929
And she knows it, you know?
1780
01:16:26,103 --> 01:16:27,844
I mean, who shows up to
an office Christmas party
1781
01:16:28,018 --> 01:16:29,541
wearing what amounts
to a mini skirt?
1782
01:16:29,715 --> 01:16:31,282
Who binge drinks
at an office Christmas party
1783
01:16:31,456 --> 01:16:33,066
and gets so drunk
that she gets sick in
1784
01:16:33,240 --> 01:16:34,720
the women's bathroom
and blacks out in the stall?
1785
01:16:34,894 --> 01:16:36,113
My assistant.
1786
01:16:36,679 --> 01:16:38,245
I just lock the bathroom door,
right?
1787
01:16:38,419 --> 01:16:40,204
I go to town on
that tight little pussy.
1788
01:16:40,378 --> 01:16:42,206
She's out like a light,
and to this day,
1789
01:16:42,380 --> 01:16:44,121
she has no idea
what I did to her.
1790
01:16:44,295 --> 01:16:46,645
Can we stop doing this now?
Or do you need to hear more?
1791
01:16:46,819 --> 01:16:48,342
You need me
to come out and say it?
1792
01:16:48,516 --> 01:16:50,649
Hi, everybody.
I, Calvin Green am a rapist.
1793
01:16:50,823 --> 01:16:54,305
I rape people for a living.
I raped you, Rachel.
1794
01:16:54,479 --> 01:16:56,307
If you don't get
the fuck out of here,
1795
01:16:56,481 --> 01:16:59,353
and get the fuck out of
my life, I will rape you again.
1796
01:16:59,527 --> 01:17:01,617
Maybe twice,
1797
01:17:01,791 --> 01:17:04,663
[yelling] depending
on how fast I blow my load!
1798
01:17:28,513 --> 01:17:31,385
The fuck are you doing?
Sudoku?
1799
01:17:43,310 --> 01:17:49,099
It's sarah.green@smail.com,
right?
1800
01:17:49,273 --> 01:17:54,104
And e-holt@scorchcapital.com?
1801
01:17:54,278 --> 01:17:56,323
I just want to make sure
I sent this to the right...
1802
01:17:57,324 --> 01:17:59,762
I want to make sure I have
the right addresses for them.
1803
01:18:02,460 --> 01:18:05,028
- What have you--
- Oh, I just, um--
1804
01:18:06,464 --> 01:18:10,076
I just e-mailed your wife,
and your boss. I just-- uh--
1805
01:18:11,077 --> 01:18:14,994
- Sent a little email.
- You email my-- my wife?
1806
01:18:15,168 --> 01:18:16,822
And your boss.
1807
01:18:23,611 --> 01:18:24,874
What have you done?
1808
01:18:25,831 --> 01:18:27,441
You did it yourself.
1809
01:18:29,052 --> 01:18:30,444
Like I said...
1810
01:18:31,881 --> 01:18:33,621
surveillance state.
1811
01:18:33,665 --> 01:18:36,363
[Calvin on recording]
She's out like a light,
1812
01:18:36,407 --> 01:18:38,714
and to this day, she has no
idea what I did to her.
1813
01:18:38,757 --> 01:18:41,151
Can we stop doing this now,
or do you need to hear more?
1814
01:18:41,194 --> 01:18:43,849
Do you need me to come out
and say it? Hi, everybody.
1815
01:18:43,893 --> 01:18:45,808
- [Rachel] Mm.
- I-- Calvin Green am a rapist.
1816
01:18:45,851 --> 01:18:47,940
I rape people for a living.
I raped you, Rachel.
1817
01:18:47,984 --> 01:18:49,681
If you don't get
the fuck out of here,
1818
01:18:49,725 --> 01:18:51,596
and get the fuck out
of my life,
1819
01:18:51,639 --> 01:18:53,729
I will rape you again,
maybe twice.
1820
01:18:53,772 --> 01:18:56,732
Depending on how fast
I blow my load.
1821
01:18:58,559 --> 01:18:59,691
It's not true...
1822
01:19:01,867 --> 01:19:03,129
what I said.
1823
01:19:05,958 --> 01:19:08,787
I was saying
what you wanted me to say.
1824
01:19:11,659 --> 01:19:12,922
I was...
1825
01:19:15,359 --> 01:19:16,926
I was making it up?
1826
01:19:17,970 --> 01:19:20,756
I just made that up.
1827
01:19:23,019 --> 01:19:25,195
I just made that shit up.
Okay, Rachel?
1828
01:19:28,981 --> 01:19:32,071
I didn't actually do
any of that stuff.
1829
01:19:34,204 --> 01:19:37,120
I never did anything
to you, or anybody else.
1830
01:19:41,080 --> 01:19:44,344
Wha-- Why are you
doing this to me?
1831
01:19:46,520 --> 01:19:47,957
No one will believe you.
1832
01:19:50,307 --> 01:19:52,048
Do you really believe that?
1833
01:19:57,401 --> 01:19:59,490
Fuck you, you fucking bitch.
1834
01:20:06,236 --> 01:20:08,847
[Rachel yelping]
1835
01:20:10,675 --> 01:20:13,417
[struggling]
1836
01:20:13,591 --> 01:20:16,899
[yelling]
1837
01:20:27,300 --> 01:20:30,869
[Rachel protesting]
1838
01:20:31,043 --> 01:20:36,266
[muffled screaming]
1839
01:20:41,358 --> 01:20:45,536
[struggling]
1840
01:20:47,581 --> 01:20:51,368
[Rachel gasping]
1841
01:20:56,852 --> 01:21:01,944
[Calvin breathing slowing]
1842
01:21:18,917 --> 01:21:22,747
[both breathing]
1843
01:21:28,927 --> 01:21:32,496
[muted thudding]
1844
01:21:35,891 --> 01:21:38,894
[heartbeat]
1845
01:21:55,867 --> 01:21:59,392
[high-pitched ringing]
1846
01:22:32,860 --> 01:22:36,212
[warped tones]
1847
01:23:03,152 --> 01:23:06,416
[exhaling slowly]
1848
01:23:33,051 --> 01:23:36,011
[taser buzzing]
1849
01:24:06,650 --> 01:24:07,912
[curtain rings scraping]
1850
01:24:44,209 --> 01:24:48,039
[belt buckle tinkling]
1851
01:25:31,343 --> 01:25:35,042
[Skype ringtone chiming]
1852
01:25:50,188 --> 01:25:54,018
[Skype tone continuing to ring]
1853
01:25:58,457 --> 01:26:01,547
[Calvin groaning, whining]
1854
01:26:03,027 --> 01:26:07,814
[sighing, murmuring]
1855
01:26:13,080 --> 01:26:14,169
[call dropping]
1856
01:26:47,811 --> 01:26:50,030
[Calvin sobbing softly]
1857
01:26:50,205 --> 01:26:54,165
- [Calvin murmuring]
- [Skype ringtone chiming]
1858
01:26:54,339 --> 01:26:59,692
No... Please...
1859
01:26:59,866 --> 01:27:03,522
- No.
- [Rachel breathing heavily]
1860
01:27:12,052 --> 01:27:15,055
No. No, no.
1861
01:27:18,015 --> 01:27:21,366
[Rachel breathing]
1862
01:27:21,540 --> 01:27:24,587
[Calvin whining]
1863
01:27:31,071 --> 01:27:36,816
[breathing intensifying]
1864
01:27:36,990 --> 01:27:39,819
[tense piano notes]
1865
01:27:44,302 --> 01:27:48,350
[discordant classical music]
1866
01:28:20,120 --> 01:28:25,517
♪
1867
01:28:59,334 --> 01:29:04,382
♪
1868
01:29:30,669 --> 01:29:35,761
♪
1869
01:29:58,305 --> 01:30:03,223
♪
1870
01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:05,748
[footsteps]
1871
01:30:07,663 --> 01:30:10,317
[birds chirping]
1872
01:30:23,026 --> 01:30:26,159
[cars passing]
1873
01:30:29,075 --> 01:30:32,775
[aircraft passing overhead]
146062
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