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(narrator)
Since the beginning of time,
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00:01:11,229 --> 00:01:14,983
since the first little girl
ever existed,
3
00:01:15,066 --> 00:01:18,444
there have been dolls.
4
00:01:20,571 --> 00:01:24,534
But the dolls were always
and forever baby dolls.
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00:01:26,786 --> 00:01:27,870
The girls who played with them
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00:01:27,954 --> 00:01:31,374
could only ever play
at being mothers.
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00:01:31,499 --> 00:01:36,129
Which can be fun,
at least for a while, anyway.
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00:01:37,422 --> 00:01:38,881
Ask your mother.
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00:01:41,426 --> 00:01:43,469
This continued until...
10
00:01:45,471 --> 00:01:48,308
("Thus Spake Zarathustra"
plays)
11
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(warning buzz)
12
00:02:03,072 --> 00:02:04,407
(ting)
13
00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:53,581
Yes, Barbie changed everything.
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00:02:54,248 --> 00:02:57,126
Then, she changed it all again.
15
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:59,253
All of these women are Barbie,
16
00:02:59,337 --> 00:03:02,548
and Barbie is
all of these women.
17
00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:06,010
She might have started out as
just a lady in a bathing suit,
18
00:03:06,094 --> 00:03:08,971
but she became so much more.
19
00:03:09,055 --> 00:03:11,808
She has her own money,
her own house,
20
00:03:11,891 --> 00:03:15,061
her own car, her own career.
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00:03:15,770 --> 00:03:20,441
Because Barbie can be anything,
women can be anything.
22
00:03:20,525 --> 00:03:22,860
And this has been reflected back
23
00:03:22,944 --> 00:03:26,364
onto the little girls of today
in the Real World.
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00:03:26,948 --> 00:03:28,866
Girls can grow into women,
25
00:03:28,950 --> 00:03:30,493
who can achieve everything
26
00:03:30,618 --> 00:03:32,912
and anything
they set their mind to.
27
00:03:33,204 --> 00:03:34,497
Thanks to Barbie,
28
00:03:34,622 --> 00:03:40,169
all problems of feminism and
equal rights have been solved.
29
00:03:41,254 --> 00:03:44,090
At least
that's what the Barbies think.
30
00:03:44,173 --> 00:03:47,051
After all,
they're living in Barbie Land.
31
00:03:47,135 --> 00:03:49,262
Who am I to burst their bubble?
32
00:03:50,471 --> 00:03:52,807
And here is one
of those Barbies now,
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00:03:52,890 --> 00:03:55,643
living her best day every day.
34
00:03:57,228 --> 00:03:59,355
(Lizzo) When I wake up
35
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,691
In my own pink world
36
00:04:01,774 --> 00:04:05,778
I get up out of bed
and wave to my homegirls
37
00:04:05,862 --> 00:04:08,114
Hey, Barbie, hey
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00:04:08,197 --> 00:04:10,241
She's so cool
39
00:04:10,324 --> 00:04:11,492
All dolled up
40
00:04:11,617 --> 00:04:14,245
Just playing chess
by the pool
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00:04:15,663 --> 00:04:18,374
Come on, we got
important things to do
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00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:22,670
It's her and her
and me and you
43
00:04:22,753 --> 00:04:26,924
And pink goes
with everything
44
00:04:27,008 --> 00:04:28,926
Beautiful from head to toe
45
00:04:29,010 --> 00:04:31,012
I'm read' to go,
you know, you know
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00:04:31,095 --> 00:04:35,099
It's pink,
good enough to drink
47
00:04:35,391 --> 00:04:36,976
We like other colors
48
00:04:37,101 --> 00:04:39,729
But pink just looks
so good on us
49
00:04:41,063 --> 00:04:44,484
What you wearing?
Dress or suit?
50
00:04:44,859 --> 00:04:48,613
Either way, that power
looks so good on you
51
00:04:48,696 --> 00:04:52,867
Hey, Barbie,
I like your style
52
00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:57,205
If that was really a mirror,
you'd see a perfect smile
53
00:04:57,288 --> 00:05:01,667
Round and round and round
and round and
54
00:05:04,212 --> 00:05:05,755
That's my Barbie
55
00:05:05,838 --> 00:05:08,174
Go Barbie, go Barbie
56
00:05:08,257 --> 00:05:09,800
That's my Barbie
57
00:05:12,512 --> 00:05:14,222
That's my Barbie
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00:05:14,305 --> 00:05:16,724
Go Barbie, go Barbie
59
00:05:16,807 --> 00:05:18,184
That's my Barbie
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00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:24,273
Come on, we got
important things to do
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00:05:24,357 --> 00:05:28,361
It's her and her
and me and you
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00:05:28,444 --> 00:05:32,949
And pink goes
with everything
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00:05:33,032 --> 00:05:34,617
Beautiful from head to toe
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00:05:34,742 --> 00:05:36,744
I'm read' to go,
you know, you know
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00:05:36,827 --> 00:05:39,080
-It's pink
-Pretty pink
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00:05:39,163 --> 00:05:41,082
-Good enough to drink
-Oh, yeah
67
00:05:41,165 --> 00:05:42,833
We like other colors
68
00:05:42,917 --> 00:05:45,503
But pink just looks
so good on us
69
00:05:45,628 --> 00:05:47,588
P, pretty
70
00:05:47,672 --> 00:05:49,507
I, intelligent
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00:05:49,590 --> 00:05:51,634
N, never sad
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00:05:51,717 --> 00:05:53,678
K, cool
73
00:05:53,761 --> 00:05:55,096
(narrator) When you're
playing with Barbies...
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00:05:55,179 --> 00:05:55,888
Hi, Barbie.
75
00:05:55,972 --> 00:05:57,807
...nobody bothers to walk them
down the stairs
76
00:05:57,890 --> 00:05:59,225
and out the door, et cetera.
77
00:06:00,309 --> 00:06:01,310
You just pick them up
78
00:06:01,394 --> 00:06:03,312
and put them
where you want them to go.
79
00:06:03,396 --> 00:06:06,107
You'd better fly, girl,
yeah, yeah
80
00:06:06,190 --> 00:06:08,025
(narrator)
You use your imagination.
81
00:06:08,109 --> 00:06:09,610
(Lizzo)
Hey, I was still singin'
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00:06:10,695 --> 00:06:11,821
Hi, Barbie.
83
00:06:12,321 --> 00:06:13,823
-Hi, Skipper.
-Hi, Barbie.
84
00:06:13,906 --> 00:06:14,615
And Midge.
85
00:06:14,699 --> 00:06:17,076
Midge was Barbie's
pregnant friend.
86
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:19,036
-Hey, Midge
-Let's not show Midge, actually.
87
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:20,663
She was discontinued by Mattel
88
00:06:20,746 --> 00:06:23,207
because a pregnant doll
is just too weird.
89
00:06:23,291 --> 00:06:25,167
Anyway, Barbie has another
90
00:06:25,251 --> 00:06:26,335
big day ahead of her.
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00:06:26,419 --> 00:06:28,087
-Pink
-Hi, Barbie!
92
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:29,463
Goes with everything
93
00:06:29,672 --> 00:06:31,966
-Hi, Barbie.
-Morning, Barbie. Hi.
94
00:06:32,049 --> 00:06:33,092
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
95
00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:35,094
-Another great day.
-Good morning, Barbie.
96
00:06:35,177 --> 00:06:36,053
Hi.
97
00:06:37,054 --> 00:06:38,848
-Hey, ladies.
-Good morning!
98
00:06:39,348 --> 00:06:41,601
(jackhammer runs)
99
00:06:41,684 --> 00:06:43,144
(woman) Everybody,
turn to the Barbie next to you.
100
00:06:43,477 --> 00:06:45,354
Tell her how much you love her.
Compliment her.
101
00:06:45,438 --> 00:06:47,315
Reporter Barbie, you can ask me
any question you want.
102
00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,108
Well, how come
you're so amazing?
103
00:06:49,191 --> 00:06:50,276
No comment. (laughs)
104
00:06:50,359 --> 00:06:52,486
Black Barbie, President
Black Barbie, President
105
00:06:52,653 --> 00:06:54,280
No, seriously, no comment.
106
00:06:54,363 --> 00:06:55,615
(laughter)
107
00:06:55,740 --> 00:06:57,116
I love you guys.
108
00:06:57,199 --> 00:07:01,162
The Nobel Prize for Journalism
goes to... Barbie.
109
00:07:01,621 --> 00:07:03,998
I work very hard,
so I deserve it.
110
00:07:04,123 --> 00:07:05,499
And the Nobel Prize
for Literature
111
00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,251
goes to... Barbie.
112
00:07:07,752 --> 00:07:09,045
You're the voice
of a generation.
113
00:07:09,128 --> 00:07:10,212
I know.
114
00:07:10,338 --> 00:07:12,256
In our assessment,
money is not speech,
115
00:07:12,340 --> 00:07:15,217
and corporations have no free
speech rights to begin with.
116
00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,803
So any claim on their part
to be exercising a right
117
00:07:17,887 --> 00:07:21,432
is just their attempt to turn
our democracy into a plutocracy.
118
00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:24,685
This makes me emotional,
and I'm expressing it.
119
00:07:24,977 --> 00:07:28,064
I have no difficulty
holding both logic
120
00:07:28,147 --> 00:07:30,149
and feeling at the same time.
121
00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:33,694
And it does not diminish
my powers, it expands them.
122
00:07:40,618 --> 00:07:42,578
Oh, pink
123
00:07:42,953 --> 00:07:43,996
Hi, Barbie.
124
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:46,290
What can't Barbie do?
125
00:07:47,792 --> 00:07:48,918
Hi, Barbie.
126
00:07:49,502 --> 00:07:50,753
Yay, space!
127
00:07:52,380 --> 00:07:53,589
Gosh.
128
00:07:55,341 --> 00:07:57,843
See you later
129
00:07:59,428 --> 00:08:02,098
Barbie has a great day
every day,
130
00:08:02,181 --> 00:08:05,643
but Ken only has a great day
if Barbie looks at him.
131
00:08:07,603 --> 00:08:10,106
(chatter)
132
00:08:12,775 --> 00:08:13,693
Hi, Barbie!
133
00:08:14,485 --> 00:08:15,319
Hi, Ken.
134
00:08:15,403 --> 00:08:16,696
-Hi, Barbie!
-Hi, Barbie!
135
00:08:16,987 --> 00:08:17,780
Hi, Barbie.
136
00:08:17,863 --> 00:08:18,739
(groans)
137
00:08:18,823 --> 00:08:19,907
-Hi, Ken.
-Hi, Ken.
138
00:08:20,866 --> 00:08:21,742
-Hi, Ken.
-Hi, Ken.
139
00:08:21,826 --> 00:08:23,369
-Hi, Ken.
-I got us both ice creams.
140
00:08:23,452 --> 00:08:25,079
-Cool.
-Hi, Barbie.
141
00:08:25,162 --> 00:08:26,497
-Hi, Barbie.
-Hi, Barbie.
142
00:08:26,622 --> 00:08:27,832
-Hi, Barbie.
-Hi, Barbie.
143
00:08:27,915 --> 00:08:28,582
Hi, Barbie.
144
00:08:28,666 --> 00:08:29,917
-Hi, Barbie!
-Hi, Ken.
145
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:30,710
-Hi, Barbie.
-Hi, Ken.
146
00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:32,795
-Hi, Barbie.
-Hi, Barbie.
147
00:08:32,878 --> 00:08:34,338
Hi, Barbies.
148
00:08:34,422 --> 00:08:37,133
-Bye, Barbies.
-Bye, Barbie.
149
00:08:37,508 --> 00:08:38,300
Hi, Barbie.
150
00:08:39,093 --> 00:08:40,302
Oh, hi, Allan.
151
00:08:40,386 --> 00:08:43,347
There are no multiples of Allan.
He's just Allan.
152
00:08:43,431 --> 00:08:46,142
Yeah, I'm, I...
confused about that.
153
00:08:46,851 --> 00:08:49,145
Hey, Barbie. Check me out.
154
00:09:06,954 --> 00:09:08,164
Ken!
155
00:09:11,375 --> 00:09:13,502
-Ooh!
-No!
156
00:09:13,627 --> 00:09:14,962
Ohh!
157
00:09:15,045 --> 00:09:17,339
-(gasps)
-Whoa!
158
00:09:18,466 --> 00:09:20,593
Oh, no!
159
00:09:21,260 --> 00:09:22,595
(clamor)
160
00:09:22,678 --> 00:09:23,429
-Oh, my God!
-Oh, look!
161
00:09:24,180 --> 00:09:25,264
(man) That's gotta hurt.
162
00:09:25,347 --> 00:09:26,849
-Ken.
-Oh, hey, Barbie.
163
00:09:26,932 --> 00:09:29,435
-Hi.
-How much of that did you see?
164
00:09:29,518 --> 00:09:30,728
We saw the whole thing.
165
00:09:30,811 --> 00:09:32,605
Let's get you up on your feet,
Ken. There you go.
166
00:09:32,688 --> 00:09:34,648
-You guys are so strong.
-Use your legs. There he is.
167
00:09:34,732 --> 00:09:37,109
-You okay?
-Yep. Totally.
168
00:09:37,193 --> 00:09:38,319
Looks like this beach was
169
00:09:38,444 --> 00:09:39,737
a little too much beach
for you, Ken.
170
00:09:39,820 --> 00:09:40,988
If I wasn't severely injured,
171
00:09:41,071 --> 00:09:43,199
I would beach you off
right now, Ken.
172
00:09:43,282 --> 00:09:44,492
I'll beach off with you
any day, Ken.
173
00:09:44,700 --> 00:09:46,327
Hold my ice cream, Ken.
174
00:09:47,328 --> 00:09:48,871
All right, Ken, you're on.
175
00:09:49,914 --> 00:09:50,915
Let's beach off.
176
00:09:50,998 --> 00:09:52,041
Anyone who wants
to beach him off
177
00:09:52,124 --> 00:09:53,334
has to beach me off first.
178
00:09:53,417 --> 00:09:55,586
I will beach both of you off
at the same time.
179
00:09:55,669 --> 00:09:57,213
But you don't even know
how to beach yourself off.
180
00:09:57,296 --> 00:09:58,130
How you gonna beach
both of us off?
181
00:09:58,214 --> 00:09:59,632
Okay, all right. Kens?
182
00:09:59,715 --> 00:10:01,175
Why are you getting emotional?
183
00:10:01,258 --> 00:10:04,637
Come on, Kens.
Nobody's gonna beach anyone off.
184
00:10:04,970 --> 00:10:06,013
Okay?
185
00:10:06,305 --> 00:10:07,223
Let's go.
186
00:10:08,182 --> 00:10:09,433
-Okay, okay.
-Okay.
187
00:10:09,517 --> 00:10:11,227
-You did so well.
-You still hurt?
188
00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:12,436
We'll get you fixed up.
189
00:10:19,777 --> 00:10:20,945
-Go!
-Go!
190
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,782
-Barbie, hold my hand!
-You're okay.
191
00:10:25,199 --> 00:10:26,534
Stay with me, Barbie!
192
00:10:27,284 --> 00:10:28,202
(shutter flashes)
193
00:10:28,285 --> 00:10:29,245
Great.
194
00:10:29,328 --> 00:10:31,288
Not even broken. You'll be fine.
195
00:10:31,372 --> 00:10:33,958
Shredding waves is much more
dangerous than people realize.
196
00:10:34,041 --> 00:10:35,459
You're very brave, Ken.
197
00:10:36,794 --> 00:10:38,629
-Thank you, Barbie.
-Yeah.
198
00:10:38,712 --> 00:10:40,005
You know
surfer is not even my job.
199
00:10:40,089 --> 00:10:40,756
I know.
200
00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:43,926
And it is not lifeguard,
which is a common misconception.
201
00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:46,220
-Very common.
-Because actually my job...
202
00:10:47,513 --> 00:10:49,765
-...it's just beach.
-Right.
203
00:10:49,849 --> 00:10:51,684
And what a good job
you do at beach.
204
00:10:51,767 --> 00:10:53,060
You should heal up in no time.
205
00:10:53,143 --> 00:10:54,687
Actually,
in the time that it took for me
206
00:10:54,770 --> 00:10:56,230
to say that sentence,
you healed.
207
00:10:56,313 --> 00:10:57,940
-Fantastic.
-Nice.
208
00:10:58,023 --> 00:10:59,108
-Hey, Barbie.
-Yeah?
209
00:10:59,191 --> 00:11:00,234
Can I come to your house
tonight?
210
00:11:00,317 --> 00:11:01,193
Sure.
211
00:11:01,277 --> 00:11:02,278
I don't have anything big
planned.
212
00:11:02,361 --> 00:11:03,487
Just a giant blowout party
213
00:11:03,571 --> 00:11:06,115
with all the Barbies and planned
choreography and a bespoke song.
214
00:11:06,198 --> 00:11:07,491
You should stop by.
215
00:11:07,575 --> 00:11:08,993
-So cool.
-Yeah.
216
00:11:09,159 --> 00:11:11,954
-Okay. Bye.
-Okay. Bye. Goodbye.
217
00:11:12,037 --> 00:11:16,083
Baby, you can
find me under the lights
218
00:11:16,166 --> 00:11:18,127
Diamonds under my eyes
219
00:11:18,210 --> 00:11:19,295
Turn the rhythm up
220
00:11:19,378 --> 00:11:22,590
Don't you wanna just come
along for the ride?
221
00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:24,425
Ooh, my outfit so tight
222
00:11:24,508 --> 00:11:26,969
You can see my heartbeat
tonight
223
00:11:27,052 --> 00:11:29,179
I can take the heat,
baby, best believe
224
00:11:29,263 --> 00:11:31,098
That's the moment I shine
225
00:11:31,181 --> 00:11:33,517
'Cause every romance shakes
and it bends
226
00:11:33,601 --> 00:11:35,603
Don't give a damn
227
00:11:35,686 --> 00:11:37,688
When the night's here,
I don't do tears
228
00:11:37,771 --> 00:11:40,024
Baby, no chance
229
00:11:40,107 --> 00:11:44,904
I can dance, I can dance,
I can dance
230
00:11:44,987 --> 00:11:47,781
-Watch me
-Dance
231
00:11:47,865 --> 00:11:49,783
Dance the night away
232
00:11:49,909 --> 00:11:51,243
My heart could be burnin'
233
00:11:51,327 --> 00:11:53,287
But you won't see it
on my face
234
00:11:53,370 --> 00:11:54,204
PRESIDENT
235
00:11:54,288 --> 00:11:56,373
Watch me dance
236
00:11:56,457 --> 00:11:58,584
Dance the night away
237
00:11:58,667 --> 00:12:00,628
I'll still keep
the party runnin'
238
00:12:00,711 --> 00:12:02,171
Not one hair out of place
239
00:12:02,296 --> 00:12:03,005
(echo)
Place, place
240
00:12:03,088 --> 00:12:07,176
Lately I've been movin'
close to the edge
241
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:09,637
Still be lookin' my best
242
00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:11,805
I stay on the beat,
you can count on me
243
00:12:11,889 --> 00:12:13,891
I ain't missin' no steps
244
00:12:13,974 --> 00:12:16,060
'Cause every romance shakes
and it bends
245
00:12:16,143 --> 00:12:18,228
Don't give a damn
246
00:12:18,312 --> 00:12:19,188
When the night's here...
247
00:12:19,271 --> 00:12:21,398
-Hi, Barbie.
-Hi, Ken.
248
00:12:22,566 --> 00:12:27,571
I could dance, I could dance,
I could dance
249
00:12:27,655 --> 00:12:28,364
Watch me
250
00:12:28,447 --> 00:12:30,449
-Looking good, Barbie.
-Thanks, Ken.
251
00:12:30,532 --> 00:12:32,409
Dance the night away
252
00:12:32,534 --> 00:12:33,994
My heart could be burnin'
253
00:12:34,078 --> 00:12:36,372
But you won't see it
on my face
254
00:12:36,455 --> 00:12:41,293
Watch me dance,
dance the night away
255
00:12:41,377 --> 00:12:43,003
I'll still keep
the party runnin'
256
00:12:43,087 --> 00:12:44,421
Not one hair out of place
257
00:12:44,505 --> 00:12:46,423
-Oh, hi, Ken.
-Hi!
258
00:12:46,799 --> 00:12:48,217
-Yes, yes, yes!
-Hi, Barbie.
259
00:12:48,300 --> 00:12:49,802
-Hi, Barbie.
-Barbies!
260
00:12:50,678 --> 00:12:51,929
What's up, Ken?
261
00:12:53,764 --> 00:12:55,891
I don't play safe
262
00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:58,644
-Don't you know about me?
-Uh-huh
263
00:12:58,727 --> 00:13:03,148
I could dance, I could dance,
I could dance
264
00:13:05,234 --> 00:13:06,986
Hey, Barbie. Check me out.
265
00:13:07,361 --> 00:13:09,321
I'll still keep
the party runnin'
266
00:13:09,405 --> 00:13:10,322
Not one hair
out of place
267
00:13:10,406 --> 00:13:12,199
Bet you can't do a flip
like that, Ken!
268
00:13:14,076 --> 00:13:15,160
What?
269
00:13:15,285 --> 00:13:16,745
This is a real rager, Barbie.
270
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:19,832
Thanks, Barbie. Gosh,
this night is just perfect.
271
00:13:19,915 --> 00:13:21,333
It's perfectly perfect.
272
00:13:21,417 --> 00:13:23,627
And you look so beautiful,
Barbie.
273
00:13:23,711 --> 00:13:25,587
Thanks, Barbie.
I feel so beautiful.
274
00:13:25,713 --> 00:13:27,506
-So do I.
-This is the best day ever.
275
00:13:27,631 --> 00:13:28,841
It is the best day ever.
276
00:13:28,924 --> 00:13:30,926
And so is yesterday,
and so is tomorrow,
277
00:13:31,010 --> 00:13:33,137
and so is the day after tomorrow
and even Wednesdays
278
00:13:33,220 --> 00:13:34,555
and every day
from now until forever.
279
00:13:34,638 --> 00:13:36,140
Yeah, Barbie!
280
00:13:37,182 --> 00:13:38,767
You guys ever think about dying?
281
00:13:38,851 --> 00:13:39,852
(needle scratches record)
282
00:13:49,403 --> 00:13:50,821
I don't know
why I just said that.
283
00:13:52,573 --> 00:13:55,367
I'm just dying to dance.
284
00:13:55,451 --> 00:13:57,953
-(music resumes)
-(cheering)
285
00:14:04,460 --> 00:14:06,754
I don't play safe
286
00:14:06,837 --> 00:14:09,423
-Don't you know about me?
-Uh-huh
287
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:13,177
I could dance, I could dance,
I could dance
288
00:14:13,260 --> 00:14:15,095
Dance the night
289
00:14:33,947 --> 00:14:34,990
Wow. (chuckles)
290
00:14:35,449 --> 00:14:36,784
You can go now.
291
00:14:37,701 --> 00:14:39,119
I thought
I might stay over tonight.
292
00:14:39,203 --> 00:14:40,162
Why?
293
00:14:40,579 --> 00:14:41,872
Because
we're girlfriend/boyfriend.
294
00:14:42,289 --> 00:14:43,457
To do what?
295
00:14:44,833 --> 00:14:46,251
I'm actually not sure.
296
00:14:47,169 --> 00:14:49,630
Oh, but, I don't want you here.
297
00:14:49,713 --> 00:14:50,798
Is it Ken?
298
00:14:50,881 --> 00:14:52,466
Ken's just a really good friend.
299
00:14:52,549 --> 00:14:54,551
And this is my Dreamhouse.
It's Barbie's Dreamhouse.
300
00:14:54,676 --> 00:14:56,512
It's not Ken's Dreamhouse.
Right?
301
00:14:56,637 --> 00:14:58,388
(laughs) Right as always.
302
00:14:58,514 --> 00:15:00,224
Okay. And it's girls' night.
303
00:15:00,307 --> 00:15:02,351
Come on, Barbie! Slumber party!
304
00:15:02,434 --> 00:15:03,811
Hurry up. The President's here.
305
00:15:03,894 --> 00:15:05,312
I am. You're welcome.
306
00:15:06,146 --> 00:15:09,191
-Every night is girls' night.
-Mm-hmm. Every night. Forever.
307
00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:12,986
-Every night.
-Forever and ever.
308
00:15:13,445 --> 00:15:14,780
-Good night.
-Good night.
309
00:15:16,865 --> 00:15:19,868
(Barbies scream and laugh)
310
00:15:20,994 --> 00:15:22,079
(whispers) I love you, too.
311
00:15:22,162 --> 00:15:25,374
(Barbies) Girls' night!
Girls' night! Girls' night!
312
00:15:25,457 --> 00:15:27,126
I can't. I gotta go.
313
00:15:27,209 --> 00:15:30,420
(Barbies, chanting) Girls' night!
Girls' night! Girls' night!
314
00:15:30,504 --> 00:15:33,590
Girls' night! Girls' night!
Girls' night!
315
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:36,552
Good night, Barbies!
316
00:15:36,635 --> 00:15:39,054
I'm definitely not thinking
about death anymore.
317
00:15:49,731 --> 00:15:51,358
(birds chirping)
318
00:16:00,534 --> 00:16:02,119
(music blares)
319
00:16:02,202 --> 00:16:06,415
When I wake up
in my own pink world
320
00:16:06,498 --> 00:16:07,416
Hi, Barbie.
321
00:16:07,499 --> 00:16:10,460
I get up out of bed
and wave to my homegirls
322
00:16:10,544 --> 00:16:12,713
-Hey, Barbie
-Hey
323
00:16:13,046 --> 00:16:14,965
-Why so stressed?
-Hi, Barbie.
324
00:16:15,048 --> 00:16:16,925
Could it be
those irrepressible...
325
00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:19,386
-Hi, Barbie.
-...thoughts of death
326
00:16:20,095 --> 00:16:23,223
Come on, we got
important things to-- Ooh!
327
00:16:23,307 --> 00:16:27,311
It's her, and her,
and me and you
328
00:16:27,394 --> 00:16:30,689
And pink goes
with everything
329
00:16:30,772 --> 00:16:31,857
Oh, that's cold
330
00:16:31,940 --> 00:16:33,650
Beautiful from head to toe
331
00:16:33,734 --> 00:16:35,694
I'm read' to go,
you know, you know
332
00:16:35,777 --> 00:16:38,030
It's pink,
it's gonna be all right
333
00:16:38,113 --> 00:16:40,032
Good enough to drink
334
00:16:40,115 --> 00:16:44,203
We like other colors, but pink
just looks so good on us
335
00:16:44,328 --> 00:16:46,413
P, panic
336
00:16:46,496 --> 00:16:48,498
I, I'm scared
337
00:16:48,582 --> 00:16:50,667
N, nauseous
338
00:16:50,751 --> 00:16:52,252
K, death
339
00:16:53,337 --> 00:16:55,047
That's my Barbie
340
00:16:55,130 --> 00:16:57,299
Go Barbie, go Barbie
341
00:16:57,424 --> 00:16:59,718
That's my Barbie,
ooh-ooh
342
00:16:59,801 --> 00:17:00,844
Aah!
343
00:17:00,969 --> 00:17:03,013
Oh, girl, you okay?
344
00:17:03,722 --> 00:17:04,890
Hi, Barbie.
345
00:17:05,849 --> 00:17:08,644
I'm fine. A-okay.
346
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:12,147
-You got it, Barbie.
-Let's go, Barbie!
347
00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:13,315
Great cheer, Kens.
348
00:17:13,398 --> 00:17:14,650
High five!
349
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:16,151
Hey, Barbie.
350
00:17:16,235 --> 00:17:18,320
Come on, Barbie.
Let's run towards the water.
351
00:17:18,403 --> 00:17:19,488
Okay.
352
00:17:31,083 --> 00:17:32,084
My feet!
353
00:17:35,128 --> 00:17:36,046
Oh, no.
354
00:17:37,172 --> 00:17:38,966
Yes! So good!
355
00:17:43,929 --> 00:17:44,846
Hey, Barbie.
356
00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:45,764
-Hi.
-Are you okay?
357
00:17:45,847 --> 00:17:47,808
-Hey, Barbie.
-Yeah, Barbie. I just fell.
358
00:17:47,891 --> 00:17:49,434
-Fell?
-I'm so embarrassed.
359
00:17:49,559 --> 00:17:51,103
-Barbie doesn't get embarrassed.
-I know.
360
00:17:51,186 --> 00:17:53,230
Barbie, I don't even
have context for this,
361
00:17:53,313 --> 00:17:57,109
but my feet...
my heels are on the ground.
362
00:17:57,192 --> 00:17:58,944
I'm no longer on tiptoes.
363
00:17:59,027 --> 00:18:00,445
That's okay. Let me see.
364
00:18:02,489 --> 00:18:03,573
(gasp)
365
00:18:03,699 --> 00:18:06,410
Flat feet!
366
00:18:06,493 --> 00:18:09,371
(screaming)
367
00:18:09,454 --> 00:18:11,790
(retching)
368
00:18:15,669 --> 00:18:16,920
Stop it, Ken.
369
00:18:17,004 --> 00:18:18,714
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
370
00:18:18,797 --> 00:18:20,132
I know I'm Stereotypical Barbie
371
00:18:20,215 --> 00:18:21,842
and therefore
don't form conjectures
372
00:18:21,925 --> 00:18:24,052
concerning the causality
of adjacent unfolding events,
373
00:18:24,136 --> 00:18:26,305
but some things have been
happening that might be related.
374
00:18:26,388 --> 00:18:28,557
(sighs)
375
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:30,434
Bad breath this morning,
a cold shower,
376
00:18:30,517 --> 00:18:32,185
burnt waffle,
and falling off my roof.
377
00:18:32,311 --> 00:18:33,228
You're malfunctioning.
378
00:18:33,353 --> 00:18:36,481
What? No, I'm just, I'm--
Am I?
379
00:18:36,565 --> 00:18:38,191
I've never seen this kind
of malfunction before.
380
00:18:38,275 --> 00:18:40,360
It's usually just hair-related.
381
00:18:40,444 --> 00:18:42,946
You know, you're gonna have to
visit Weird Barbie.
382
00:18:43,322 --> 00:18:45,866
I have never
had to visit Weird Barbie.
383
00:18:45,949 --> 00:18:47,617
That's because
you've never malfunctioned.
384
00:18:47,743 --> 00:18:49,244
I heard that she used to be
385
00:18:49,328 --> 00:18:50,912
the most beautiful Barbie
of all,
386
00:18:51,038 --> 00:18:54,249
but then someone played with her
too hard in the Real World.
387
00:19:05,427 --> 00:19:07,095
And now
she's fated to an eternity
388
00:19:07,179 --> 00:19:08,638
of making other Barbies perfect
389
00:19:08,764 --> 00:19:11,141
while falling more and more
into disrepair herself.
390
00:19:11,767 --> 00:19:13,101
That,
and we all call her Weird Barbie
391
00:19:13,185 --> 00:19:15,520
both behind her back
and also to her face.
392
00:19:15,604 --> 00:19:16,980
She's so weird.
393
00:19:18,398 --> 00:19:20,650
Why is she always in the splits?
394
00:19:27,741 --> 00:19:31,828
Oh, I would never wear heels
if my feet were shaped this way.
395
00:19:35,582 --> 00:19:36,792
Hello?
396
00:19:36,917 --> 00:19:37,584
Woof.
397
00:19:37,667 --> 00:19:38,377
Oh.
398
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:39,961
Bark.
399
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:42,631
Woof.
400
00:19:44,007 --> 00:19:45,050
Bark.
401
00:19:45,675 --> 00:19:48,970
Hey.
What's cookin', good-lookin'?
402
00:19:49,471 --> 00:19:50,889
-Hi.
-Welcome.
403
00:19:51,181 --> 00:19:52,933
Welcome to my Weirdhouse.
404
00:19:56,978 --> 00:19:59,022
-Hi, how are ya?
-Nice to meet you.
405
00:19:59,106 --> 00:20:01,316
Sorry about the dog crap.
What can I do ya for?
406
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,694
I just had to come see you
about my feet.
407
00:20:04,778 --> 00:20:06,113
They're, um...
408
00:20:12,494 --> 00:20:14,037
Flat.
409
00:20:14,121 --> 00:20:15,038
Yeah.
410
00:20:15,122 --> 00:20:17,040
-Never seen that before.
-Really?
411
00:20:17,124 --> 00:20:17,916
Whoa.
412
00:20:17,999 --> 00:20:20,877
Okay. Well, can you,
you know, fix them?
413
00:20:21,169 --> 00:20:22,129
You're Stereotypical Barbie,
right?
414
00:20:22,212 --> 00:20:23,213
Mm-hmm.
415
00:20:24,131 --> 00:20:28,718
That Ken of yours, he is one
nice-looking little protein pot.
416
00:20:29,052 --> 00:20:29,886
I guess.
417
00:20:29,970 --> 00:20:31,263
I'd like to see
what kind of nude blob
418
00:20:31,346 --> 00:20:33,723
he's packing under those jeans.
419
00:20:34,015 --> 00:20:36,476
-Anyway, what preceded this?
-Oh, nothing.
420
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,396
A really fun game of volleyball.
421
00:20:40,355 --> 00:20:42,899
-That's it?
-Thoughts of death.
422
00:20:43,358 --> 00:20:44,359
What is it?
423
00:20:46,528 --> 00:20:48,697
Maybe some thoughts of death?
424
00:20:48,780 --> 00:20:50,490
Thoughts of death!
425
00:20:50,615 --> 00:20:52,659
-Is that a problem?
-Oh.
426
00:20:52,784 --> 00:20:54,494
-What?
-I've heard of this.
427
00:20:54,578 --> 00:20:57,456
Of course, I didn't think
it was possible, but it's real.
428
00:20:59,332 --> 00:21:01,751
Oh, you've done it.
You've opened a portal.
429
00:21:01,835 --> 00:21:03,170
I didn't open a portal.
430
00:21:03,795 --> 00:21:07,382
Someone did, and now
there is a rip in the continuum
431
00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:10,302
that is the membrane between
Barbie Land and the Real World,
432
00:21:10,385 --> 00:21:12,095
and if you wanna be
Stereotypical Barbie
433
00:21:12,179 --> 00:21:14,598
perfect again, then,
baby girl, you gotta go fix it.
434
00:21:14,681 --> 00:21:16,183
Or you're gonna keep
going funny.
435
00:21:16,266 --> 00:21:17,309
Look at your upper thigh.
436
00:21:18,643 --> 00:21:21,021
-(gasps) What is that?
-That's cellulite.
437
00:21:21,104 --> 00:21:22,439
-That's gonna spread everywhere.
-What?
438
00:21:22,522 --> 00:21:23,982
And then you're gonna
start getting sad
439
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:25,650
and mushy and complicated.
440
00:21:25,734 --> 00:21:27,027
-No!
-(hisses)
441
00:21:27,110 --> 00:21:28,278
What do I have to do?
442
00:21:28,862 --> 00:21:30,405
You have to go
443
00:21:30,489 --> 00:21:31,907
-to the Real World.
-Okay.
444
00:21:31,990 --> 00:21:34,075
And you have to find the girl
who's playing with you.
445
00:21:34,201 --> 00:21:35,160
Playing with me?
446
00:21:35,243 --> 00:21:36,411
We're all being played with,
babe.
447
00:21:36,495 --> 00:21:38,997
But usually there's some kind
of separation. Thanks.
448
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:43,084
There's the girl and the doll.
And never the twain shall cross.
449
00:21:43,168 --> 00:21:44,586
-The twain is crossing?
-Yes.
450
00:21:44,669 --> 00:21:46,755
And the girl who's playing
with you, she must be sad,
451
00:21:46,838 --> 00:21:48,715
and her thoughts and feelings
and humanness
452
00:21:48,798 --> 00:21:50,967
are interfering
with your dollness.
453
00:21:51,218 --> 00:21:52,719
Why would she be sad?
454
00:21:52,802 --> 00:21:55,472
We fixed everything so that
all women in the Real World
455
00:21:55,639 --> 00:21:56,973
can be happy and powerful.
456
00:21:57,057 --> 00:21:58,225
I don't know, but if you ask me,
457
00:21:58,308 --> 00:21:59,809
you had something
to do with this too.
458
00:21:59,893 --> 00:22:00,602
Me?
459
00:22:00,685 --> 00:22:02,312
-Takes two to rip a portal.
-I can't have.
460
00:22:02,395 --> 00:22:03,688
I've only ever wanted
461
00:22:03,772 --> 00:22:05,607
for everything
to stay exactly as it is.
462
00:22:05,690 --> 00:22:06,650
Well, be that as it may,
463
00:22:06,733 --> 00:22:10,487
the two of you are becoming
inextricably intertwined.
464
00:22:10,737 --> 00:22:12,781
And you gotta help her
to help yourself.
465
00:22:15,700 --> 00:22:18,078
(girls' voices)
466
00:22:18,787 --> 00:22:19,663
So, should-- Whoo!
467
00:22:20,121 --> 00:22:21,581
So, what'll it be then?
468
00:22:21,706 --> 00:22:23,124
You can go
back to your regular life
469
00:22:23,208 --> 00:22:24,834
and forget any of this
ever happened,
470
00:22:24,918 --> 00:22:27,754
or you can know the truth
about the universe.
471
00:22:28,755 --> 00:22:31,466
The choice is now yours.
472
00:22:32,133 --> 00:22:33,426
The first one. The high heel.
473
00:22:34,010 --> 00:22:36,179
No. We'll do a re-do.
474
00:22:36,930 --> 00:22:38,348
You're supposed to want to know.
475
00:22:38,431 --> 00:22:39,307
I don't.
476
00:22:39,432 --> 00:22:40,725
Babe, listen.
477
00:22:40,809 --> 00:22:42,769
You have to want to know, okay?
Do it again.
478
00:22:42,852 --> 00:22:45,021
I'm not Adventure Barbie.
I'm Stereotypical Barbie.
479
00:22:45,105 --> 00:22:46,314
I'm like the Barbie you think of
480
00:22:46,398 --> 00:22:48,191
when someone says,
"Think of a Barbie."
481
00:22:48,858 --> 00:22:49,651
That's me.
482
00:22:50,652 --> 00:22:53,697
I'm bummed. You're a bummer.
That's a bummer.
483
00:22:53,780 --> 00:22:55,782
Okay, I'm ready to forget now.
484
00:22:55,865 --> 00:22:58,076
No! You're doing this one!
485
00:22:58,243 --> 00:22:59,369
I just gave you a choice
486
00:22:59,452 --> 00:23:00,996
so you could feel
some sense of control.
487
00:23:01,079 --> 00:23:02,998
-So there is no option one?
-No!
488
00:23:03,081 --> 00:23:06,251
You have to fix the rip
yourself.
489
00:23:06,334 --> 00:23:08,628
Don't blame me, blame Mattel.
They make the rules.
490
00:23:08,712 --> 00:23:10,130
Oh, I don't want to.
491
00:23:10,213 --> 00:23:11,840
Fine, get cellulite.
I don't care.
492
00:23:12,132 --> 00:23:14,384
No! No, no, no. No. Okay. Yeah.
493
00:23:17,220 --> 00:23:18,930
Send me through the portal.
494
00:23:20,056 --> 00:23:21,308
Okay.
There's actually no portal.
495
00:23:21,391 --> 00:23:22,767
-Oh.
-It's a figure of speech.
496
00:23:22,851 --> 00:23:25,478
It's actually a sports car
to a speedboat,
497
00:23:25,562 --> 00:23:28,148
to a rocket ship,
to a tandem bike,
498
00:23:28,231 --> 00:23:30,859
to a camper van, fun,
to a snowmobile, brr...
499
00:23:30,942 --> 00:23:32,277
which will take you
most of the way
500
00:23:32,360 --> 00:23:33,945
to the state of Los Angeles,
501
00:23:34,029 --> 00:23:35,947
where you will don neon
and Rollerblades,
502
00:23:36,031 --> 00:23:38,158
and enter
the country of California.
503
00:23:38,658 --> 00:23:40,702
Weird, I know. Best if you
don't think about it too much.
504
00:23:40,785 --> 00:23:43,413
And then when I get there,
how do I find this girl?
505
00:23:44,372 --> 00:23:45,624
You will know.
506
00:23:46,333 --> 00:23:48,627
Okay. And how do I get back?
507
00:23:48,710 --> 00:23:50,378
The same way you came,
but in reverse.
508
00:23:50,462 --> 00:23:53,298
Like I should move forward but
do the order backward or go--
509
00:23:53,423 --> 00:23:55,300
-Don't overthink it.
-Oh. Okay.
510
00:23:55,383 --> 00:23:59,679
For you see, if you do not
find her and fix things,
511
00:23:59,763 --> 00:24:01,514
what's ugly will become uglier,
512
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,433
and what's weird
will become weirder.
513
00:24:03,516 --> 00:24:05,310
And then you'll look like me.
514
00:24:05,393 --> 00:24:06,645
Aah! Oh.
515
00:24:07,771 --> 00:24:08,730
Sorry.
516
00:24:09,564 --> 00:24:11,733
I understand.
I set myself up for that.
517
00:24:12,025 --> 00:24:14,027
-Anyway, I believe in you.
-Thank you.
518
00:24:14,110 --> 00:24:16,529
Go. Be careful. I love you.
519
00:24:16,946 --> 00:24:18,990
-Bye.
-Bye.
520
00:24:19,074 --> 00:24:21,159
(crowd) Bon voyage to reality,
521
00:24:21,284 --> 00:24:24,079
and good luck
restoring the membrane
522
00:24:24,162 --> 00:24:26,873
that separates
our world from theirs
523
00:24:26,956 --> 00:24:29,000
so you don't get cellulite!
524
00:24:29,084 --> 00:24:30,835
(cheering)
525
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:32,128
I guess
she's going without you.
526
00:24:32,212 --> 00:24:33,546
You're so lost, Ken.
527
00:24:33,630 --> 00:24:36,091
-(laughs)
-She literally asked me.
528
00:24:36,174 --> 00:24:38,301
And I was like,
"I prefer to stay here."
529
00:24:38,385 --> 00:24:39,678
Why? Are you scared?
530
00:24:39,761 --> 00:24:41,846
-No.
-(laughs) I bet you're scared.
531
00:24:41,930 --> 00:24:43,932
And I bet she doesn't
even want you to go.
532
00:24:44,641 --> 00:24:46,101
Well, you bet
both those things incorrectly,
533
00:24:46,184 --> 00:24:48,061
and I bet
in the opposite direction.
534
00:24:48,144 --> 00:24:49,396
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
535
00:24:49,479 --> 00:24:52,732
Which way is that?
You don't even know.
536
00:24:52,857 --> 00:24:53,775
I just don't want to leave.
537
00:24:53,900 --> 00:24:55,694
I'm trying to find reasons
not to leave.
538
00:24:55,777 --> 00:24:56,611
Please stay.
539
00:24:56,695 --> 00:24:58,154
I'm gonna miss you guys so much.
540
00:24:58,238 --> 00:25:00,782
I just wish someone could come
with me, but you can't.
541
00:25:00,865 --> 00:25:01,783
I should do this alone.
542
00:25:01,908 --> 00:25:03,618
-What bird am I thinking of?
-Parrot.
543
00:25:03,702 --> 00:25:05,203
Dolphin. I mean, no, a bird.
544
00:25:06,162 --> 00:25:07,038
Pelican.
545
00:25:07,122 --> 00:25:08,248
-Ohh.
-Man.
546
00:25:08,873 --> 00:25:09,916
We'll miss you, Barbie.
547
00:25:09,999 --> 00:25:11,459
I'll be back in no time,
with perfect feet,
548
00:25:11,626 --> 00:25:13,336
and we'll forget
that this ever happened.
549
00:25:13,420 --> 00:25:14,504
And you'll get to see
all the good work
550
00:25:14,629 --> 00:25:15,964
we've done to fix the world.
551
00:25:16,047 --> 00:25:17,716
You'll be such a hero to them.
552
00:25:17,799 --> 00:25:19,592
All those grateful,
powerful women
553
00:25:19,676 --> 00:25:21,886
who owe their wonderful lives
to Barbie.
554
00:25:21,970 --> 00:25:24,013
I'll bet every woman
will say thank you
555
00:25:24,139 --> 00:25:25,557
and give you a really big hug.
556
00:25:25,849 --> 00:25:28,768
Yes, you're right. Here I go.
557
00:25:29,519 --> 00:25:30,437
Bye.
558
00:25:31,020 --> 00:25:33,273
-Bye, Barbie.
-Bye.
559
00:25:34,816 --> 00:25:37,068
Bye, Barbie.
Good luck in reality.
560
00:25:37,152 --> 00:25:39,237
-Watch for cellulite!
-(horn honks)
561
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:43,992
I went to the doctor,
I went to the mountains
562
00:25:44,117 --> 00:25:48,455
I looked to the children,
I drank from the fountains
563
00:25:48,913 --> 00:25:52,959
There's more than one answer
to these questions
564
00:25:53,042 --> 00:25:56,045
Pointing me
in a crooked line
565
00:25:56,129 --> 00:26:00,049
And the less I seek my source
for some definitive
566
00:26:00,133 --> 00:26:05,096
Closer I am to fine
567
00:26:05,180 --> 00:26:07,098
-Closer I am to fi--
-Closer I am to fi--
568
00:26:07,182 --> 00:26:09,350
-Aah!
-Aah!
569
00:26:09,434 --> 00:26:12,854
(continue screaming)
570
00:26:14,689 --> 00:26:16,316
(panting)
What are you doing here?
571
00:26:16,399 --> 00:26:17,400
I'm coming with you.
572
00:26:17,484 --> 00:26:19,778
-No. Please get out.
-I can't.
573
00:26:19,861 --> 00:26:21,404
I made a double bet with Ken,
574
00:26:21,529 --> 00:26:24,282
and you can't make me
look uncool in front of Ken.
575
00:26:24,365 --> 00:26:25,742
Ken's not cool!
576
00:26:25,867 --> 00:26:27,035
He is to me.
577
00:26:27,118 --> 00:26:28,661
You're just gonna slow me down.
578
00:26:28,787 --> 00:26:30,747
Barbie, what if there's beach?
579
00:26:31,122 --> 00:26:32,957
You'll need someone
who's a professional in that.
580
00:26:35,251 --> 00:26:36,586
Did you bring your Rollerblades?
581
00:26:37,462 --> 00:26:39,297
I literally go nowhere
without them.
582
00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:42,926
-Please?
-Okay.
583
00:26:43,009 --> 00:26:44,427
Wow. (chuckling)
584
00:26:44,511 --> 00:26:46,137
Let's do this.
585
00:26:46,221 --> 00:26:47,555
-Can I sit in the front?
-No.
586
00:26:49,182 --> 00:26:52,769
(narrator) And so Barbie and Ken
set off on their adventure
587
00:26:52,852 --> 00:26:54,854
to the Real World.
588
00:27:27,554 --> 00:27:29,848
-Barbie.
-Wow. (laughs)
589
00:27:29,931 --> 00:27:30,890
Yes!
590
00:27:39,357 --> 00:27:41,484
Wow. This is the Real World.
591
00:27:41,609 --> 00:27:43,987
Barbie,
I told you there'd be beach.
592
00:27:44,070 --> 00:27:44,779
Yeah.
593
00:27:45,697 --> 00:27:47,866
(onlookers whistle)
594
00:27:51,661 --> 00:27:52,620
Hmm.
595
00:27:52,704 --> 00:27:54,455
Oh, yeah!
596
00:27:56,791 --> 00:27:58,126
-(wolf whistle)
-What's going on?
597
00:27:58,209 --> 00:28:00,169
Give us a smile, blondie.
598
00:28:01,754 --> 00:28:03,172
Why are these men looking at me?
599
00:28:03,256 --> 00:28:04,966
Yeah,
they're also staring at me.
600
00:28:05,216 --> 00:28:06,259
Oh, love that!
601
00:28:06,843 --> 00:28:07,594
Wow.
602
00:28:07,677 --> 00:28:10,221
I feel kind of ill at ease,
like...
603
00:28:10,847 --> 00:28:12,348
I don't know the word for it,
but I'm...
604
00:28:12,432 --> 00:28:13,349
(man) Nice leotard.
605
00:28:13,433 --> 00:28:17,145
...conscious, but it's myself
that I'm conscious of.
606
00:28:17,270 --> 00:28:18,354
(Ken)
I'm not getting any of that.
607
00:28:18,438 --> 00:28:20,732
I feel what could only
be described as admired.
608
00:28:20,815 --> 00:28:22,901
-(man) Damn, girl!
-But not ogled.
609
00:28:22,984 --> 00:28:23,902
(man) You're hot.
610
00:28:23,985 --> 00:28:25,612
And there's no undertone
of violence.
611
00:28:25,695 --> 00:28:28,156
Mine very much has
an undertone of violence.
612
00:28:28,740 --> 00:28:30,325
Oh, look, a construction site.
613
00:28:30,450 --> 00:28:32,285
We need
that good feminine energy.
614
00:28:32,368 --> 00:28:34,579
-Yeah.
-Ladies! Yoo-hoo.
615
00:28:34,662 --> 00:28:36,581
-Oh.
-You got fries with that shake?
616
00:28:36,664 --> 00:28:38,541
If I said you had a hot body,
would you hold it against me?
617
00:28:38,625 --> 00:28:39,459
Have I died and gone to heaven?
618
00:28:39,542 --> 00:28:40,460
Is that a mirror
in your pocket?
619
00:28:40,543 --> 00:28:41,502
Baby, you are an angel.
620
00:28:41,628 --> 00:28:42,670
I can see myself in your shorts.
621
00:28:42,754 --> 00:28:44,172
I don't know exactly
what you meant
622
00:28:44,255 --> 00:28:45,673
with all of those little quips,
623
00:28:45,757 --> 00:28:47,634
but I'm picking up
on some sort of entendre,
624
00:28:47,717 --> 00:28:49,260
which appears to be double,
625
00:28:49,344 --> 00:28:50,929
and I would just like
to inform you,
626
00:28:51,012 --> 00:28:53,389
I do not have a vagina.
627
00:28:54,390 --> 00:28:56,309
And he does not have a penis.
628
00:28:56,392 --> 00:28:58,186
We don't have genitals.
629
00:28:58,269 --> 00:28:59,228
-That's okay.
-Yeah.
630
00:28:59,312 --> 00:29:00,772
-Yeah, whatever. Yeah.
-It's cool.
631
00:29:01,522 --> 00:29:03,232
I have all the genitals.
632
00:29:03,858 --> 00:29:04,692
Geez, you would think
633
00:29:04,776 --> 00:29:06,235
a construction site
at lunch time
634
00:29:06,319 --> 00:29:08,488
would be the perfect place
for a little woman power,
635
00:29:08,571 --> 00:29:11,491
but this one was so... male.
636
00:29:12,700 --> 00:29:16,162
Everything is almost like...
reversed here.
637
00:29:19,290 --> 00:29:20,208
Oh, look.
638
00:29:20,291 --> 00:29:21,334
The Supreme Court.
639
00:29:21,417 --> 00:29:22,961
-(Ken) They're so smart.
-Yeah.
640
00:29:23,044 --> 00:29:25,213
(man) Yeah, Brian, do it, bro!
641
00:29:25,296 --> 00:29:26,547
(slap)
642
00:29:30,468 --> 00:29:32,387
I love me a leotard.
643
00:29:32,470 --> 00:29:33,972
I love the elbow pads.
644
00:29:34,055 --> 00:29:36,057
I think we should get
some different clothes.
645
00:29:38,434 --> 00:29:39,811
We look great.
646
00:29:39,894 --> 00:29:41,396
-I love fringe.
-I love denim.
647
00:29:41,479 --> 00:29:42,772
-Ha ha ha ha!
-(laughs)
648
00:29:43,356 --> 00:29:44,607
Hey, man.
649
00:29:44,941 --> 00:29:46,943
You guys gotta pay
for that stuff.
650
00:29:49,737 --> 00:29:51,239
She looks even better
in more clothes.
651
00:29:51,322 --> 00:29:52,824
Because you can imagine more.
652
00:29:52,949 --> 00:29:55,076
You know what? Keep 'em.
653
00:29:55,618 --> 00:29:57,912
Weird Barbie said I would know
how to find this girl,
654
00:29:57,996 --> 00:29:59,831
but I have no idea.
655
00:29:59,914 --> 00:30:00,873
Hmm.
656
00:30:00,957 --> 00:30:02,458
What would a smart Barbie do?
657
00:30:03,001 --> 00:30:04,877
I just need to clear my mind
so I can think.
658
00:30:05,253 --> 00:30:07,255
Who is playing with me?
659
00:30:07,338 --> 00:30:09,257
I hate it when people think.
I get so bored.
660
00:30:09,340 --> 00:30:11,634
Faster I figure it out,
the faster we get to go home.
661
00:30:12,051 --> 00:30:13,886
-What am I supposed to do?
-Ken!
662
00:30:14,012 --> 00:30:15,513
-Go for a walk or something.
-By myself?
663
00:30:15,596 --> 00:30:16,806
-Yes.
-Really? Where?
664
00:30:17,140 --> 00:30:18,182
Anywhere.
665
00:30:18,266 --> 00:30:20,101
-Can I go that way?
-Yes. Okay.
666
00:30:25,982 --> 00:30:27,442
-Don't go far.
-Okay!
667
00:30:29,193 --> 00:30:30,903
(exhales)
668
00:30:32,196 --> 00:30:33,281
(man) Excuse me, sir.
669
00:30:34,323 --> 00:30:35,366
Thanks, man.
670
00:30:46,210 --> 00:30:47,045
What's up, man?
671
00:30:47,879 --> 00:30:48,796
We've got to man up on this one.
672
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:49,714
Great workout, man.
673
00:30:49,797 --> 00:30:50,965
(men) Men, men, men.
674
00:30:51,049 --> 00:30:53,634
-You're the man!
-No, you're the man!
675
00:30:53,718 --> 00:30:55,053
Men, men, men.
676
00:31:01,434 --> 00:31:02,935
(horse neighs)
677
00:31:05,146 --> 00:31:07,857
Based on the ROI,
we are exceeding expectations.
678
00:31:07,940 --> 00:31:09,025
Good stuff.
679
00:31:09,108 --> 00:31:09,942
I'm not worried about it.
680
00:31:10,026 --> 00:31:11,736
Not now, Margaret.
Let's shake on this.
681
00:31:11,819 --> 00:31:12,820
We are gonna make
a lot of money.
682
00:31:12,904 --> 00:31:13,863
We are officially important.
683
00:31:13,946 --> 00:31:15,531
-(businessmen laugh)
-Mm-hmm.
684
00:31:29,212 --> 00:31:30,171
(gunshot)
685
00:31:36,928 --> 00:31:38,221
Yes!
686
00:32:45,830 --> 00:32:46,914
That felt...
687
00:32:48,166 --> 00:32:50,668
...achy, but good.
688
00:32:52,211 --> 00:32:54,213
(chatter)
689
00:32:59,302 --> 00:33:01,220
(man) I'm just trying
to make this work.
690
00:33:01,304 --> 00:33:02,680
(woman)
How, by calling me a lunatic?
691
00:33:02,763 --> 00:33:04,348
That's not
how you make things work.
692
00:33:04,432 --> 00:33:05,516
I don't know what this is all--
693
00:33:19,405 --> 00:33:21,741
(men conversing indistinctly)
694
00:33:45,306 --> 00:33:46,891
You're so beautiful.
695
00:33:48,309 --> 00:33:49,769
I know it.
696
00:33:54,065 --> 00:33:55,149
(chuckles)
697
00:33:56,692 --> 00:33:58,903
Barbie! Barbie!
698
00:33:58,986 --> 00:33:59,820
Yes!
699
00:34:00,279 --> 00:34:00,947
(both) I've got it!
700
00:34:01,030 --> 00:34:01,989
Oh, what do you got?
701
00:34:02,073 --> 00:34:03,491
-You go first.
-No, no, you go.
702
00:34:03,658 --> 00:34:04,951
-We'll go at the same time.
-Okay.
703
00:34:05,409 --> 00:34:07,161
-She's at school.
-Men rule the world!
704
00:34:07,620 --> 00:34:08,996
-What was that?
-The kid's at the school?
705
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:10,039
But what did you say?
706
00:34:10,122 --> 00:34:11,415
-Nothing.
-Okay.
707
00:34:11,499 --> 00:34:13,417
-Well, let's go to the school.
-Okay!
708
00:34:13,501 --> 00:34:14,961
Now, come on.
709
00:34:30,059 --> 00:34:32,061
(phone rings)
710
00:34:32,645 --> 00:34:34,522
-Hello.
-This is Dan of the FBI.
711
00:34:34,689 --> 00:34:36,065
Oh. This is Aaron at Mattel.
712
00:34:36,148 --> 00:34:37,817
I don't give a flying squirrel
who you are, Aaron.
713
00:34:37,900 --> 00:34:39,694
-What are you, like an intern?
-No, I'm--
714
00:34:39,777 --> 00:34:41,362
Two of your dolls
have gotten loose.
715
00:34:41,445 --> 00:34:42,446
Impossible.
716
00:34:42,530 --> 00:34:43,906
-How do you know?
-Don't sass me, Aaron.
717
00:34:43,990 --> 00:34:46,284
Couple of blondes,
answering to Barbie and Ken.
718
00:34:46,409 --> 00:34:47,827
Rollerblading in Santa Monica.
719
00:34:47,910 --> 00:34:49,954
We're gonna need Mattel's help
landing the eagle.
720
00:34:50,037 --> 00:34:51,455
Don't crap the bed, Aaron!
721
00:34:51,539 --> 00:34:52,456
I won't.
722
00:34:52,540 --> 00:34:53,541
(Dan hangs up)
723
00:34:55,126 --> 00:34:56,627
This is bad. This is really bad.
724
00:34:57,169 --> 00:34:59,130
-What?
-Th-this happened before.
725
00:34:59,422 --> 00:35:00,339
What? When?
726
00:35:00,423 --> 00:35:02,758
I heard about ten years ago,
a woman named Skipper
727
00:35:02,883 --> 00:35:04,635
turned up at some family's home
in Key West.
728
00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:06,512
Asked to babysit the kids.
729
00:35:06,637 --> 00:35:08,139
She then tried to take
their toddler surfing.
730
00:35:08,222 --> 00:35:09,223
-Geez.
-I know.
731
00:35:09,307 --> 00:35:10,808
They were able to straighten
it out, keep it under wraps,
732
00:35:10,891 --> 00:35:13,436
but this is serious.
733
00:35:13,978 --> 00:35:16,022
-I'm going all the way up.
-No one goes all the way up.
734
00:35:16,105 --> 00:35:18,107
-I have to.
-You may never come back.
735
00:35:19,734 --> 00:35:20,735
I know.
736
00:35:26,324 --> 00:35:28,075
(humming)
737
00:35:30,703 --> 00:35:34,165
Closer I am to fine
738
00:35:34,248 --> 00:35:36,625
(humming)
Oh.
739
00:35:36,709 --> 00:35:38,461
-Hey.
-Oh, hi, Aaron.
740
00:35:38,544 --> 00:35:39,962
-New drawings?
-Yeah.
741
00:35:40,046 --> 00:35:42,840
I just started drawing
these weird designs.
742
00:35:42,923 --> 00:35:44,216
These are different.
743
00:35:44,300 --> 00:35:46,302
It's Irrepressible
Thoughts of Death Barbie.
744
00:35:47,136 --> 00:35:48,721
Full Body Cellulite Barbie.
745
00:35:49,221 --> 00:35:50,639
Crippling Shame Barbie.
746
00:35:51,349 --> 00:35:54,226
Okay. Listen, I have to
speak to the top brass.
747
00:35:54,310 --> 00:35:55,394
-No.
-I must.
748
00:35:55,478 --> 00:35:56,687
-No.
-I'm going to.
749
00:35:56,771 --> 00:35:58,939
Aaron, they're
in a big corporate idea sesh.
750
00:35:59,023 --> 00:36:00,066
No one is to be admitted.
751
00:36:00,191 --> 00:36:02,109
-Aaron! Aaron! Aaron, stop!
-Always be empowering girls.
752
00:36:02,193 --> 00:36:03,194
Always!
753
00:36:03,319 --> 00:36:05,321
-But what do we really sell?
-I'll tell you what.
754
00:36:05,446 --> 00:36:06,739
-(receptionist) Aaron.
-We sell dreams.
755
00:36:07,073 --> 00:36:08,866
And imagination!
756
00:36:09,742 --> 00:36:11,452
And sparkle!
757
00:36:11,827 --> 00:36:13,204
I get excited. I'm passionate.
758
00:36:13,287 --> 00:36:15,956
And when you think of sparkle,
what do you think of after that?
759
00:36:16,332 --> 00:36:17,583
Female agency.
760
00:36:18,667 --> 00:36:19,418
Excuse me.
761
00:36:20,711 --> 00:36:22,922
-Who are you?
-Aaron Dinkins, sir.
762
00:36:23,005 --> 00:36:24,965
We're in the middle of a major
sit-down here, Aaron Dinkins.
763
00:36:25,049 --> 00:36:26,759
I think you're gonna want
to hear this, sir.
764
00:36:26,842 --> 00:36:28,094
Can you just e-mail it?
765
00:36:28,177 --> 00:36:29,762
And you can send it me EOD.
766
00:36:29,845 --> 00:36:30,930
(whispers) End of day.
767
00:36:31,806 --> 00:36:32,681
-That's cool.
-Yeah.
768
00:36:32,765 --> 00:36:35,518
May I put it in a whisper, sir?
769
00:36:36,102 --> 00:36:37,186
Fine. Whisper me.
770
00:36:42,525 --> 00:36:44,068
(whispers)
771
00:36:48,155 --> 00:36:50,116
(whispering)
772
00:36:53,744 --> 00:36:54,537
Huh.
773
00:36:55,704 --> 00:36:57,832
(whispering)
774
00:37:00,376 --> 00:37:01,794
No! No!
775
00:37:01,877 --> 00:37:03,838
Aah! Aah! No.
776
00:37:03,921 --> 00:37:05,339
-Get the chair!
-Take the cart.
777
00:37:05,423 --> 00:37:06,215
We're okay.
778
00:37:07,883 --> 00:37:09,343
-You all right?
-He's okay.
779
00:37:09,427 --> 00:37:10,719
-Okay.
-He's okay.
780
00:37:11,429 --> 00:37:12,763
(exhales)
781
00:37:13,931 --> 00:37:15,891
It's a repeat
of Skipper in Key West.
782
00:37:15,975 --> 00:37:19,687
And with all due respect,
that was Skipper, sir.
783
00:37:19,770 --> 00:37:22,314
This is... Barbie.
784
00:37:25,151 --> 00:37:26,026
If this got out
785
00:37:26,110 --> 00:37:28,654
that our dolls were coming
to Los Angeles from Barbie Land
786
00:37:28,737 --> 00:37:31,282
as life-size versions
of themselves...
787
00:37:32,366 --> 00:37:34,118
roaming the Earth...
788
00:37:35,411 --> 00:37:37,455
...this would be very bad.
789
00:37:37,746 --> 00:37:39,748
Barbie in the Real World?
790
00:37:40,958 --> 00:37:41,959
That's impossible.
791
00:37:42,042 --> 00:37:44,753
We've got a definite situation
on our hands.
792
00:37:44,837 --> 00:37:46,672
Catastrophic!
793
00:37:47,006 --> 00:37:49,133
-I can't stress that enough!
-What?
794
00:37:50,050 --> 00:37:51,927
-What's your name again?
-Aaron Dinkins, sir.
795
00:37:52,011 --> 00:37:53,220
-Aaron Dickinson?
-Dinkins.
796
00:37:53,304 --> 00:37:54,138
Yes! Aaron.
797
00:37:54,221 --> 00:37:55,931
Is Barbie Land
like an alternate reality
798
00:37:56,015 --> 00:37:58,726
or is it like a place
where your imagination--
799
00:37:58,809 --> 00:37:59,852
(all) Yes!
800
00:37:59,935 --> 00:38:00,644
Okay.
801
00:38:00,728 --> 00:38:03,981
Think of it as a town
in Sweden, Aaron Dinkins.
802
00:38:04,648 --> 00:38:05,566
(all) Sweden.
803
00:38:05,941 --> 00:38:06,901
Right.
804
00:38:09,195 --> 00:38:10,446
How much do you weigh?
805
00:38:10,571 --> 00:38:11,780
Doesn't matter.
806
00:38:12,656 --> 00:38:14,074
Sounds like a job for the box.
807
00:38:14,366 --> 00:38:18,746
No one rests until this doll
is back in a box.
808
00:38:19,079 --> 00:38:20,039
(bell rings)
809
00:38:20,122 --> 00:38:21,499
Look, Davy Crockett
Junior High School,
810
00:38:21,624 --> 00:38:22,917
just like I saw in my vision.
811
00:38:23,042 --> 00:38:24,335
A man on a horse.
812
00:38:24,418 --> 00:38:26,170
I started to get all these
weirdo feelings.
813
00:38:26,253 --> 00:38:29,048
Like, I have fear
with no specific object.
814
00:38:29,131 --> 00:38:31,008
-What is that?
-It's anxiety.
815
00:38:31,091 --> 00:38:33,385
I have it too.
They're just awful at this age.
816
00:38:33,511 --> 00:38:35,054
I feel amazing.
817
00:38:35,137 --> 00:38:37,097
That's because kids don't
take it out on the dads.
818
00:38:37,389 --> 00:38:39,642
She's gotta be here somewhere.
819
00:38:39,767 --> 00:38:40,976
I need to find her soon.
820
00:38:41,060 --> 00:38:42,311
I'm just gonna pop
into the library
821
00:38:42,394 --> 00:38:44,438
and see if I can find
any books on trucks.
822
00:38:44,522 --> 00:38:45,898
Okay, just don't get in trouble.
823
00:38:46,023 --> 00:38:47,233
I won't!
824
00:38:54,073 --> 00:38:56,825
(no audible dialogue)
825
00:38:57,701 --> 00:38:58,744
(exhales)
826
00:39:01,413 --> 00:39:02,873
What are you doing?
827
00:39:02,957 --> 00:39:05,668
Oh, uh,
what's that girl's name?
828
00:39:06,085 --> 00:39:07,127
That's Sasha.
829
00:39:07,336 --> 00:39:08,837
-Hey, Sasha!
-Don't talk to her.
830
00:39:08,963 --> 00:39:12,258
Sasha can talk to you,
but you can never talk to Sasha.
831
00:39:12,341 --> 00:39:14,593
-She'll crush you.
-Don't worry.
832
00:39:14,677 --> 00:39:16,762
Everyone really likes me
and thinks I'm cool and pretty.
833
00:39:17,846 --> 00:39:18,722
Huh.
834
00:39:18,806 --> 00:39:19,723
Thank you.
835
00:39:22,977 --> 00:39:26,855
Hey, ladies. Sasha, what's up?
836
00:39:29,316 --> 00:39:30,109
Who are you?
837
00:39:30,192 --> 00:39:31,694
(laughs)
838
00:39:33,028 --> 00:39:36,323
I'm only your favorite woman
of all time.
839
00:39:36,448 --> 00:39:37,825
Barbie!
840
00:39:39,660 --> 00:39:41,370
You really think you're Barbie?
841
00:39:42,162 --> 00:39:43,372
-Yeah.
-She's crazy.
842
00:39:43,455 --> 00:39:44,873
Do you think she escaped
from like an insane asylum?
843
00:39:44,957 --> 00:39:47,334
So you're like Barbie Barbie?
Like a professional bimbo?
844
00:39:47,418 --> 00:39:48,961
No. Barbie's not a bimbo.
845
00:39:49,044 --> 00:39:51,130
Barbie is a doctor and a lawyer
and a senator
846
00:39:51,213 --> 00:39:52,965
and a Nobel Prize winner.
847
00:39:53,048 --> 00:39:54,592
You're a Nobel Prize winner?
848
00:39:54,675 --> 00:39:58,262
Not me, but Barbie is.
849
00:39:58,345 --> 00:39:59,388
Yeah.
850
00:39:59,471 --> 00:40:02,600
Aren't you guys gonna thank me
and give me a big hug?
851
00:40:05,102 --> 00:40:06,854
For being your favorite toy.
852
00:40:06,937 --> 00:40:08,022
We haven't played with Barbie
853
00:40:08,105 --> 00:40:09,690
since we were
like five years old.
854
00:40:10,232 --> 00:40:11,900
Yeah, I hated dolls with hair.
855
00:40:11,984 --> 00:40:14,278
I mean, I'd play with Barbie,
but it was like the last resort.
856
00:40:14,361 --> 00:40:15,487
I loved Barbie.
857
00:40:15,571 --> 00:40:16,363
(clears throat)
858
00:40:16,447 --> 00:40:17,489
Oh.
859
00:40:17,573 --> 00:40:19,908
Anyways, even then
it was horrible for us.
860
00:40:20,034 --> 00:40:21,035
It was horrible?
861
00:40:22,494 --> 00:40:23,454
Why?
862
00:40:23,912 --> 00:40:25,164
-Come on, Sasha.
-Give it to her.
863
00:40:25,247 --> 00:40:26,290
Destroy Barbie.
864
00:40:27,625 --> 00:40:30,628
Okay, Barbie, let's do this.
865
00:40:31,420 --> 00:40:33,422
You've been making women
feel bad about themselves
866
00:40:33,505 --> 00:40:34,673
since you were invented.
867
00:40:34,757 --> 00:40:36,425
I think you have that
the wrong way around.
868
00:40:36,550 --> 00:40:39,094
You represent everything wrong
with our culture.
869
00:40:39,178 --> 00:40:42,389
Sexualized capitalism,
unrealistic physical ideals...
870
00:40:42,473 --> 00:40:45,726
No, no, no. You're describing
something stereotypical.
871
00:40:45,809 --> 00:40:48,687
Barbie is so much more
than that.
872
00:40:48,771 --> 00:40:50,230
Look at yourself.
873
00:40:51,106 --> 00:40:53,942
Well, I am technically
Stereotypical Barbie.
874
00:40:54,026 --> 00:40:56,654
You set the feminist movement
back 50 years.
875
00:40:56,737 --> 00:40:58,614
You destroyed
girls' innate sense of worth
876
00:40:58,697 --> 00:40:59,740
and you are killing the planet
877
00:40:59,865 --> 00:41:02,117
with your glorification
of rampant consumerism.
878
00:41:02,201 --> 00:41:06,580
No, I'm supposed to help you
and make you happy and powerful.
879
00:41:06,664 --> 00:41:08,207
Oh, I am powerful.
880
00:41:08,290 --> 00:41:10,501
And until you showed up here
and declared yourself Barbie,
881
00:41:10,626 --> 00:41:13,045
I hadn't thought about you
in years, you fascist!
882
00:41:17,257 --> 00:41:19,009
Oh. Um...
883
00:41:19,885 --> 00:41:20,886
Okay.
884
00:41:21,345 --> 00:41:23,847
It's happening again.
(laughing) I have to--
885
00:41:23,931 --> 00:41:25,724
Will you excuse me?
886
00:41:25,808 --> 00:41:28,060
It was really nice
talking to you.
887
00:41:35,401 --> 00:41:36,819
They never listen.
888
00:41:50,708 --> 00:41:52,334
Excuse me, sir,
do you have the time?
889
00:41:53,252 --> 00:41:54,503
You respect me.
890
00:41:54,628 --> 00:41:56,672
Sorry, no,
do you know what time it is?
891
00:41:57,423 --> 00:41:59,007
No, I do not.
892
00:41:59,091 --> 00:42:00,426
(laughs)
893
00:42:00,509 --> 00:42:01,385
Okay.
894
00:42:01,468 --> 00:42:03,345
Why didn't Barbie tell me
about patriarchy,
895
00:42:03,429 --> 00:42:04,805
which, to my understanding,
896
00:42:04,888 --> 00:42:07,099
is where men and horses
run everything?
897
00:42:07,516 --> 00:42:08,851
Sure.
898
00:42:08,934 --> 00:42:10,728
I shall seek my fortune there.
899
00:42:10,811 --> 00:42:13,731
All right. So...
900
00:42:13,814 --> 00:42:15,315
I'll take a high-level,
high-paying job
901
00:42:15,399 --> 00:42:16,358
with influence, please.
902
00:42:16,442 --> 00:42:17,776
Okay,
you'll need at least a MBA.
903
00:42:17,860 --> 00:42:19,278
And a lot of our people
have PhDs.
904
00:42:19,361 --> 00:42:20,362
Isn't being a man enough?
905
00:42:20,446 --> 00:42:22,406
Actually, right now,
it's kind of the opposite.
906
00:42:22,489 --> 00:42:25,451
You guys are clearly not doing
patriarchy very well.
907
00:42:25,617 --> 00:42:27,661
(laughing) No! No. We're...
908
00:42:28,704 --> 00:42:32,124
We're doing it well, yeah.
We just... hide it better now.
909
00:42:32,249 --> 00:42:33,417
Oh.
910
00:42:34,126 --> 00:42:37,504
No, I won't let you do
just one appendectomy.
911
00:42:37,629 --> 00:42:39,006
-But I'm a man.
-But not a doctor.
912
00:42:39,089 --> 00:42:40,090
-Please?
-No.
913
00:42:40,174 --> 00:42:42,176
-Can I talk to a doctor?
-You are talking to a doctor.
914
00:42:42,259 --> 00:42:43,719
-Can you get me a coffee?
-No.
915
00:42:43,802 --> 00:42:44,803
-And I need a clicky pen.
-No.
916
00:42:44,887 --> 00:42:45,888
-And a white coat.
-No.
917
00:42:45,971 --> 00:42:46,764
-And a sharp thing.
-No.
918
00:42:46,889 --> 00:42:48,849
-There he is. Doctor!
-Somebody get security.
919
00:42:48,932 --> 00:42:51,101
I'd like to apply
for your job of beach.
920
00:42:51,185 --> 00:42:52,686
So, you want to be a lifeguard?
921
00:42:52,770 --> 00:42:55,439
Oh. I'm not trained
to go over there.
922
00:42:55,522 --> 00:42:57,441
I'm trained to stand
confidently right here.
923
00:42:57,524 --> 00:42:59,193
There's nobody in danger here.
924
00:42:59,276 --> 00:43:01,779
And even if there were,
I'm not trained to save them.
925
00:43:01,862 --> 00:43:02,905
Then I can't hire you.
926
00:43:02,988 --> 00:43:05,073
I can't even beach here!
927
00:43:07,159 --> 00:43:09,119
(sobbing)
928
00:43:09,203 --> 00:43:11,413
She thinks I'm a fascist?
929
00:43:11,497 --> 00:43:16,210
I don't control the railways
or the flow of commerce.
930
00:43:18,295 --> 00:43:19,379
-There you are.
-Oh, no.
931
00:43:19,463 --> 00:43:20,631
That went terrible.
932
00:43:20,714 --> 00:43:24,760
I need to find somewhere where
I can start patriarchy fresh.
933
00:43:28,430 --> 00:43:29,473
Miss Barbie?
934
00:43:29,640 --> 00:43:30,974
It's just Barbie.
935
00:43:31,058 --> 00:43:32,726
We're gonna need you
to come with us.
936
00:43:32,810 --> 00:43:33,811
Oh.
937
00:43:34,728 --> 00:43:36,396
-Who are you?
-We're Mattel.
938
00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:38,315
-Mattel?
-Mattel.
939
00:43:38,398 --> 00:43:40,067
Oh, thank goodness!
940
00:43:40,150 --> 00:43:42,110
I've gotta talk
to somebody in charge.
941
00:43:42,194 --> 00:43:43,570
Everything is backwards here.
942
00:43:43,654 --> 00:43:45,447
Men look at me
like I'm an object.
943
00:43:45,531 --> 00:43:46,907
Girls hate me.
944
00:43:47,032 --> 00:43:49,368
Everyone thinks I'm crazy,
and I keep getting arrested.
945
00:43:49,451 --> 00:43:50,744
Need you to step this way,
ma'am.
946
00:43:50,828 --> 00:43:52,162
I also just learned to cry.
947
00:43:52,246 --> 00:43:54,498
First, I got one tear
and then I got a whole bunch.
948
00:43:54,665 --> 00:43:56,250
What do I do?
Do I follow Barbie
949
00:43:56,333 --> 00:43:58,252
into that scary unmarked
black truck car?
950
00:43:59,127 --> 00:44:01,380
A truck car
I'd like to have, actually.
951
00:44:02,089 --> 00:44:05,175
You're right, she's fine.
It's Mattel.
952
00:44:05,259 --> 00:44:06,218
-Yeah.
-I know.
953
00:44:06,510 --> 00:44:07,511
I'll go to Barbie Land,
954
00:44:07,636 --> 00:44:08,929
and I'll tell the Kens
what I've learned.
955
00:44:09,012 --> 00:44:10,264
Oh, it's going to be beautiful!
956
00:44:10,347 --> 00:44:11,223
Ha ha ha!
957
00:44:11,348 --> 00:44:12,182
Okay.
958
00:44:12,266 --> 00:44:14,059
-Back to Barbie Land.
-Let's go that way.
959
00:44:15,519 --> 00:44:17,354
-Hi, Bunny Boo-Boo.
-Don't call me that.
960
00:44:17,437 --> 00:44:20,190
Sorry. I'm off early
because of a crisis at work,
961
00:44:20,274 --> 00:44:23,026
but I thought we could
go get some soft serve.
962
00:44:23,110 --> 00:44:25,404
Thank God
they arrested that nutjob.
963
00:44:25,487 --> 00:44:26,655
Um, um...
964
00:44:26,738 --> 00:44:28,907
that reality-challenged woman.
965
00:44:29,074 --> 00:44:30,242
She thinks she's Barbie.
966
00:44:30,325 --> 00:44:31,410
Wait, what did you say?
967
00:44:31,743 --> 00:44:34,705
She thinks she's Barbie.
She's like fully convinced.
968
00:44:35,914 --> 00:44:38,041
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
969
00:44:38,125 --> 00:44:39,751
Mom. Mom!
970
00:44:40,711 --> 00:44:42,671
Mom, get back in the car!
971
00:44:44,464 --> 00:44:45,924
(Sasha) Are you kidding me?
972
00:44:47,676 --> 00:44:48,677
Mom!
973
00:44:50,762 --> 00:44:54,349
Mattel! Of course it was
you guys that brought me here.
974
00:44:54,433 --> 00:44:56,393
Because it definitely wasn't
that Sasha girl.
975
00:44:57,769 --> 00:44:59,897
Thanks for the ride.
This has been so much fun.
976
00:44:59,980 --> 00:45:03,233
(gasps)
Wow, the mothership!
977
00:45:07,779 --> 00:45:10,157
-Barbie!
-We're so happy to see you.
978
00:45:10,240 --> 00:45:11,033
Hi!
979
00:45:11,116 --> 00:45:12,409
Would you like
some mineral water?
980
00:45:12,492 --> 00:45:13,702
Yes, thank you.
981
00:45:13,785 --> 00:45:15,120
Oh, thanks.
982
00:45:17,706 --> 00:45:19,666
I'm not used to that
having anything in it.
983
00:45:19,750 --> 00:45:21,752
(laughter)
984
00:45:23,837 --> 00:45:24,504
Thank you.
985
00:45:24,796 --> 00:45:26,298
So, we've been very anxious
986
00:45:26,423 --> 00:45:27,841
to get some quality
face-time with you.
987
00:45:27,925 --> 00:45:29,343
Of course.
So what can I do
988
00:45:29,426 --> 00:45:31,720
to repair the rift
in the space-time continuum,
989
00:45:31,803 --> 00:45:33,513
get my feet back,
and that one cellulite gone,
990
00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:36,183
and just generally not
turn into Weird Barbie?
991
00:45:36,266 --> 00:45:38,644
We have been discussing
that very topic.
992
00:45:38,727 --> 00:45:39,478
(snap)
993
00:45:39,603 --> 00:45:42,147
If you're agreeable to it,
we would love it
994
00:45:42,230 --> 00:45:45,943
if you could just get
into that giant box.
995
00:45:48,862 --> 00:45:50,697
Get into the box and you'll go
back to Barbie Land.
996
00:45:50,781 --> 00:45:53,200
And everything will be
as it was.
997
00:45:53,659 --> 00:45:55,744
You know what? We should
probably get Ken first.
998
00:45:55,827 --> 00:45:57,955
-Ken?
-Ken.
999
00:45:58,038 --> 00:45:59,414
You know, Ken. Barbie and Ken.
1000
00:46:01,041 --> 00:46:03,251
-Yes, Ken. Yeah.
-Get the guy. Yeah.
1001
00:46:05,212 --> 00:46:08,382
Back to Barbie Land!
Ha ha ha ha!
1002
00:46:08,465 --> 00:46:10,050
I'm gonna be sick.
I'm gonna be sick. (retches)
1003
00:46:10,926 --> 00:46:13,845
Ken isn't something
we're worried about.
1004
00:46:14,763 --> 00:46:15,681
Ever.
1005
00:46:16,098 --> 00:46:18,266
Okay, I'll just, um,
I'll get in the box then.
1006
00:46:18,350 --> 00:46:19,685
All right. Yes.
1007
00:46:21,228 --> 00:46:23,271
Oh. But since I came
all this way,
1008
00:46:23,355 --> 00:46:25,273
could I just meet
the woman in charge,
1009
00:46:25,357 --> 00:46:26,858
your CEO?
1010
00:46:27,609 --> 00:46:28,819
That would be me.
1011
00:46:28,944 --> 00:46:30,237
-Oh. Your CFO.
-Me.
1012
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:31,613
-Your COO.
-Here.
1013
00:46:31,697 --> 00:46:32,656
President
of the Barbie division.
1014
00:46:32,739 --> 00:46:34,199
-Present.
-I'm a man with no power.
1015
00:46:34,324 --> 00:46:35,826
Does that make me a woman?
1016
00:46:36,451 --> 00:46:38,161
Are any women in charge?
1017
00:46:38,912 --> 00:46:42,249
Listen, I know exactly
where you're going with this,
1018
00:46:42,332 --> 00:46:44,960
and I have to say
I really resent it.
1019
00:46:45,043 --> 00:46:47,796
We are a company
literally made of women.
1020
00:46:47,879 --> 00:46:49,965
We had a woman CEO in the '90s.
1021
00:46:50,424 --> 00:46:52,592
And there was another one...
1022
00:46:53,427 --> 00:46:56,138
...at some other time.
1023
00:46:57,681 --> 00:47:00,225
So that's--
that's two right there.
1024
00:47:00,517 --> 00:47:04,563
Women are the freaking
foundation of this very long
1025
00:47:04,688 --> 00:47:06,148
phallic building.
1026
00:47:06,231 --> 00:47:08,942
We have gender neutral bathrooms
up the wazoo.
1027
00:47:09,026 --> 00:47:11,862
Every single one of these men
love women.
1028
00:47:11,945 --> 00:47:13,488
I'm a son of a mother.
1029
00:47:13,947 --> 00:47:15,449
I'm the mother of a son.
1030
00:47:16,408 --> 00:47:19,036
I'm... I'm the nephew
of a woman aunt.
1031
00:47:20,203 --> 00:47:21,663
Some of my best friends
are Jewish.
1032
00:47:23,665 --> 00:47:25,292
What I'm trying to say is...
1033
00:47:26,001 --> 00:47:27,794
Get in the box, you Jezebel!
1034
00:47:27,878 --> 00:47:28,879
(gasping)
1035
00:47:28,962 --> 00:47:30,505
What? I can't say Jezebel now?
1036
00:47:30,630 --> 00:47:33,008
I haven't been in a box in ages.
1037
00:47:33,300 --> 00:47:34,801
See? It's easy.
1038
00:47:36,344 --> 00:47:37,304
Oh, okay.
1039
00:47:38,930 --> 00:47:41,933
Oh, my gosh.
I remember this smell.
1040
00:47:42,017 --> 00:47:44,102
I'm having a real
Proustian flashback.
1041
00:47:44,186 --> 00:47:47,355
Remember Proust Barbie?
That did not sell very well.
1042
00:47:54,696 --> 00:47:55,530
Oh, hi.
1043
00:47:55,655 --> 00:47:58,116
You know what?
Um, before I get in the box,
1044
00:47:58,241 --> 00:47:59,326
could I just run to the restroom
1045
00:47:59,409 --> 00:48:01,119
and make sure
my hair is perfect?
1046
00:48:01,203 --> 00:48:02,412
Fine.
Can you be speedy about it?
1047
00:48:02,496 --> 00:48:03,288
Mm-hmm.
1048
00:48:04,706 --> 00:48:06,374
-Down this way?
-It's just down the hallway.
1049
00:48:06,666 --> 00:48:08,585
-Thank you.
-On the right.
1050
00:48:12,631 --> 00:48:14,424
(Mattel CEO) I guess she really
had to go to the bathroom.
1051
00:48:14,508 --> 00:48:15,717
(alarm blares)
1052
00:48:15,801 --> 00:48:16,968
Get that Barbie!
1053
00:48:19,262 --> 00:48:21,473
Don't you dare push that button.
Let me push it.
1054
00:48:22,808 --> 00:48:25,227
(alarm continues)
1055
00:48:26,353 --> 00:48:28,063
I said get that Barbie!
1056
00:48:30,107 --> 00:48:31,608
Where's Barbie?
1057
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:33,568
I'm gaining on you.
1058
00:48:35,529 --> 00:48:36,530
I'll capture you.
1059
00:48:38,115 --> 00:48:39,282
(both scream)
1060
00:48:41,451 --> 00:48:42,160
Barbie!
1061
00:48:42,244 --> 00:48:44,037
It's quicker to go
over the cubicles.
1062
00:48:45,122 --> 00:48:46,665
-It's quicker.
-Sure.
1063
00:48:49,167 --> 00:48:50,210
Aah!
1064
00:48:52,003 --> 00:48:53,296
Get that Barbie!
1065
00:48:54,047 --> 00:48:55,465
-Barbie!
-Damn it, Barbie!
1066
00:48:55,799 --> 00:48:56,800
Barbie!
1067
00:48:57,092 --> 00:48:58,969
I'm gonna get you! Barbie!
1068
00:49:08,728 --> 00:49:09,688
Oh!
1069
00:49:15,277 --> 00:49:17,320
(footsteps)
1070
00:49:29,249 --> 00:49:31,293
Don't worry. You're safe here.
1071
00:49:32,794 --> 00:49:34,296
What is this place?
1072
00:49:34,838 --> 00:49:39,050
(chuckles) I always find
I think best at kitchen tables.
1073
00:49:42,262 --> 00:49:43,305
Tea?
1074
00:49:44,222 --> 00:49:46,016
Uh, yes, please.
1075
00:49:50,854 --> 00:49:52,564
So a woman does work here.
1076
00:49:53,315 --> 00:49:56,193
Oh, sweetie,
we do more than work here.
1077
00:50:03,825 --> 00:50:05,076
Thank you.
1078
00:50:25,305 --> 00:50:26,431
What?
1079
00:50:27,349 --> 00:50:28,975
It's because I don't know
how to drink tea?
1080
00:50:29,351 --> 00:50:32,187
No. You look different.
1081
00:50:32,979 --> 00:50:36,900
It's not how I normally look.
I usually look perfect.
1082
00:50:38,026 --> 00:50:38,985
I don't know.
1083
00:50:39,819 --> 00:50:41,863
I think you're just right.
1084
00:50:49,621 --> 00:50:51,873
The Real World isn't
what I thought it was.
1085
00:50:53,083 --> 00:50:54,209
It never is.
1086
00:50:54,292 --> 00:50:56,169
And isn't that marvelous?
1087
00:50:57,879 --> 00:50:59,673
Who are you?
1088
00:51:00,924 --> 00:51:02,926
(Mattel CEO) Which way did she go?
Who saw her last?
1089
00:51:03,009 --> 00:51:05,095
If you go through that closet,
1090
00:51:05,178 --> 00:51:07,847
you'll find a stairwell
down to the lobby.
1091
00:51:08,223 --> 00:51:09,182
Okay.
1092
00:51:12,227 --> 00:51:14,229
Thank you, um...
1093
00:51:15,438 --> 00:51:16,731
Ruth.
1094
00:51:17,607 --> 00:51:19,526
Ruth. Thank you, Ruth.
1095
00:51:20,402 --> 00:51:22,070
You're welcome, Barbie.
1096
00:51:27,701 --> 00:51:29,744
(alarm blares)
1097
00:51:36,084 --> 00:51:37,043
(elevator door dings)
1098
00:51:38,837 --> 00:51:40,171
Oh, we got her! There she is!
1099
00:51:43,091 --> 00:51:44,592
-Key card!
-Key card.
1100
00:51:44,676 --> 00:51:45,969
I don't have my key card.
1101
00:51:48,138 --> 00:51:49,431
Get in!
1102
00:51:54,561 --> 00:51:56,980
Now! Get in now!
1103
00:51:57,063 --> 00:51:57,814
(door opens)
1104
00:51:57,897 --> 00:51:58,857
-Come on.
-Oh.
1105
00:51:59,983 --> 00:52:00,817
Aah!
1106
00:52:03,111 --> 00:52:05,822
Oh, no! Now we're never
gonna get Barbie!
1107
00:52:05,905 --> 00:52:07,115
Oh, we didn't need it!
1108
00:52:07,240 --> 00:52:08,366
Barbie!
1109
00:52:09,117 --> 00:52:10,368
Let's form a plan here.
1110
00:52:11,453 --> 00:52:14,706
I would normally have shotgun.
I'll go in the first one.
1111
00:52:15,290 --> 00:52:15,957
Hang on.
1112
00:52:18,168 --> 00:52:19,169
Aah!
1113
00:52:19,294 --> 00:52:20,503
God, I hope
nobody from school saw us
1114
00:52:20,628 --> 00:52:22,172
put a life-size Barbie
in our car.
1115
00:52:22,255 --> 00:52:24,007
-How did this even happen?
-I don't know.
1116
00:52:24,090 --> 00:52:25,967
How are you here?
You're like an idea.
1117
00:52:26,051 --> 00:52:27,135
A great idea.
1118
00:52:27,218 --> 00:52:30,221
So, I've been
a little lonely lately.
1119
00:52:30,305 --> 00:52:31,514
And I found those Barbies
we used to play with...
1120
00:52:31,639 --> 00:52:33,808
-I thought we gave those away.
-I started playing with them.
1121
00:52:33,892 --> 00:52:36,186
And making drawings
like we used to do. Remember?
1122
00:52:36,269 --> 00:52:37,645
Because I thought
it would be joyful.
1123
00:52:37,729 --> 00:52:39,022
-Was it?
-No, it wasn't.
1124
00:52:39,147 --> 00:52:40,565
I got sad and weird,
1125
00:52:40,648 --> 00:52:42,484
and then the drawings
got sad and weird,
1126
00:52:42,567 --> 00:52:44,861
and maybe
because I couldn't be like you,
1127
00:52:44,944 --> 00:52:46,488
I ended up making you like me.
1128
00:52:48,239 --> 00:52:49,908
Did any of these drawings
by chance
1129
00:52:49,991 --> 00:52:52,035
have thoughts
of death and cellulite?
1130
00:52:52,702 --> 00:52:55,497
Yes! Irrepressible
Thoughts of Death Barbie.
1131
00:52:55,622 --> 00:52:57,957
-Oh, my God!
-And Cellulite!
1132
00:52:58,083 --> 00:53:00,126
(both gasp)
1133
00:53:01,628 --> 00:53:03,713
-I came for you!
-You came for me!
1134
00:53:04,255 --> 00:53:06,257
Those were your memories.
1135
00:53:32,325 --> 00:53:35,787
(Sasha, echoing) Hello. Hello?
1136
00:53:36,037 --> 00:53:38,164
Hello! Are you two,
like, shining?
1137
00:53:38,665 --> 00:53:40,250
No! No, it's nothing like that.
1138
00:53:40,333 --> 00:53:41,918
Are you shining
with a real Barbie?
1139
00:53:42,001 --> 00:53:43,044
No!
1140
00:53:43,336 --> 00:53:45,463
I mean, maybe.
Like a little, yes.
1141
00:53:45,588 --> 00:53:46,965
I don't even know where to start
1142
00:53:47,048 --> 00:53:48,842
with this
wishing a Barbie to life crap.
1143
00:53:48,967 --> 00:53:50,009
Oh, Sasha, listen.
1144
00:53:50,093 --> 00:53:52,137
I'm just a boring mom
with a boring job
1145
00:53:52,220 --> 00:53:53,346
and a daughter who hates me.
1146
00:53:53,430 --> 00:53:55,682
Can you blame me for wanting
to have a little fun?
1147
00:53:56,975 --> 00:53:58,226
I gotta lose these chuckleheads.
1148
00:54:01,062 --> 00:54:02,021
Mom!
1149
00:54:04,357 --> 00:54:05,984
I think I owe you ladies
an apology.
1150
00:54:06,067 --> 00:54:08,778
I thought that Barbie
had made the Real World better,
1151
00:54:08,862 --> 00:54:11,489
but the Real World is forever
and irrevocably messed up!
1152
00:54:11,656 --> 00:54:14,617
Well, the Real World is not
perfect, but you inspired me.
1153
00:54:16,786 --> 00:54:19,038
I love women.
I want to help women.
1154
00:54:19,122 --> 00:54:20,665
Oh, come off it,
everybody hates women.
1155
00:54:20,748 --> 00:54:21,833
Women hate women,
and men hate women.
1156
00:54:21,916 --> 00:54:23,251
It's the one thing
we can all agree on.
1157
00:54:23,376 --> 00:54:24,919
-Is that true?
-It's complicated.
1158
00:54:25,003 --> 00:54:26,921
-Hate is a strong word.
-Wake up, Mom!
1159
00:54:27,005 --> 00:54:28,131
(brakes screech)
1160
00:54:28,214 --> 00:54:30,175
I am wide awake, Sasha!
1161
00:54:33,970 --> 00:54:35,972
Mom, where did you learn
to drive like this?
1162
00:54:36,639 --> 00:54:38,391
-There was this guy.
-Was it Dad?
1163
00:54:39,100 --> 00:54:41,186
Yeah, yeah, it was...
it was Dad.
1164
00:54:53,656 --> 00:54:55,617
(tires screech)
1165
00:55:00,663 --> 00:55:01,498
Okay, duck.
1166
00:55:02,499 --> 00:55:03,958
-You look so pretty.
-Don't look at me.
1167
00:55:04,083 --> 00:55:05,084
Okay, sorry.
1168
00:55:09,714 --> 00:55:12,467
I can't hold them off forever.
Where can we go?
1169
00:55:13,009 --> 00:55:15,678
Wait, I have an idea.
Can you get us to Venice Beach?
1170
00:55:15,970 --> 00:55:17,096
Sure can.
1171
00:55:17,722 --> 00:55:20,058
I love Rollerblades.
Where are we going?
1172
00:55:20,308 --> 00:55:21,851
-Barbie Land.
-What? Mom!
1173
00:55:21,935 --> 00:55:23,520
Are you really gonna let Barbie
1174
00:55:23,645 --> 00:55:26,314
take you and your tween daughter
to an imaginary land?
1175
00:55:26,397 --> 00:55:27,315
Yes, and you wanna know why?
1176
00:55:27,398 --> 00:55:28,608
Because I never get to do
anything.
1177
00:55:28,691 --> 00:55:30,527
I didn't even go on that cruise
I won at your school raffle
1178
00:55:30,610 --> 00:55:31,653
because I didn't have
enough vacation days
1179
00:55:31,736 --> 00:55:32,862
and your dad's allergic to sun.
1180
00:55:32,946 --> 00:55:34,155
-Oh.
-What about Dad?
1181
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:35,114
We can't just leave him!
1182
00:55:35,240 --> 00:55:36,407
He'll be fine.
1183
00:55:36,866 --> 00:55:38,201
Bolígrafos.
1184
00:55:38,284 --> 00:55:39,244
(woman on recording)
Bolígrafos.
1185
00:55:39,327 --> 00:55:40,995
Bolígrafos.
1186
00:55:42,664 --> 00:55:43,581
Yeah, yeah. He'll be fine.
1187
00:55:43,706 --> 00:55:44,999
Ready for fun?
1188
00:55:45,083 --> 00:55:46,167
-Yes!
-Great!
1189
00:55:46,251 --> 00:55:50,004
Here we go.
Come on and feel the magic.
1190
00:55:51,381 --> 00:55:52,715
(Sasha) Where are we?
1191
00:55:52,799 --> 00:55:53,925
How did we get
into these clothes?
1192
00:55:54,008 --> 00:55:55,385
How did we get
into this vehicle?
1193
00:55:55,468 --> 00:55:57,053
When I was a kid,
I lost these boots
1194
00:55:57,136 --> 00:55:59,097
and my mom wouldn't let me
buy a whole new Barbie
1195
00:55:59,180 --> 00:56:00,223
just to replace the boots.
1196
00:56:00,348 --> 00:56:01,307
They look so good on you.
1197
00:56:01,432 --> 00:56:02,767
-Why, thank you.
-Hey, you!
1198
00:56:02,850 --> 00:56:04,394
She was always
my favorite Barbie.
1199
00:56:04,519 --> 00:56:05,812
You're my favorite human.
1200
00:56:05,895 --> 00:56:08,523
Don't tell him,
but I never got a Ken.
1201
00:56:08,690 --> 00:56:10,692
That's because Ken
is totally superfluous.
1202
00:56:10,817 --> 00:56:12,026
Ha ha ha!
1203
00:56:12,110 --> 00:56:14,821
I didn't say that. Women hold
all major positions of power,
1204
00:56:14,946 --> 00:56:15,655
control all the money.
1205
00:56:15,738 --> 00:56:17,448
Basically, everything
that men do in your world,
1206
00:56:17,532 --> 00:56:18,700
-women do in ours.
-(gasps)
1207
00:56:18,783 --> 00:56:19,867
I mean,
that sounds kind of cool.
1208
00:56:19,951 --> 00:56:22,120
Sasha, look, dolphins!
1209
00:56:22,829 --> 00:56:26,332
Closer I am to fine
1210
00:56:26,457 --> 00:56:27,667
Yeah
1211
00:56:27,750 --> 00:56:29,669
Closer I am to fine
1212
00:56:29,752 --> 00:56:31,170
What is this song?
1213
00:56:31,254 --> 00:56:32,797
Oh, and we have
a female president
1214
00:56:32,880 --> 00:56:35,925
and it's fun and work
and friendship and female 24/7.
1215
00:56:36,009 --> 00:56:37,927
(Sasha) Do giant hands come in
and play with you?
1216
00:56:38,011 --> 00:56:39,178
(Barbie) No, that's crazy.
1217
00:56:39,262 --> 00:56:42,056
Excuse me. Have you seen
a group of women on wheels?
1218
00:56:42,140 --> 00:56:43,099
Actually, yeah,
1219
00:56:43,182 --> 00:56:44,475
there was a blonde,
a brunette and a tween.
1220
00:56:44,559 --> 00:56:45,893
They rollerbladed
in that direction.
1221
00:56:45,977 --> 00:56:47,687
Oh, no.
1222
00:56:47,770 --> 00:56:49,814
First step
is always Rollerblading.
1223
00:56:49,897 --> 00:56:50,940
Excuse me, sir?
1224
00:56:51,024 --> 00:56:52,567
They've gone to Barbie Land.
1225
00:56:52,650 --> 00:56:53,693
-(murmuring)
-Oh, no.
1226
00:56:53,776 --> 00:56:55,028
And she's brought humans
there with her.
1227
00:56:55,111 --> 00:56:57,071
This could mean extremely
weird things for our world.
1228
00:56:57,155 --> 00:56:58,239
Like what?
1229
00:56:58,364 --> 00:57:00,199
Nothing any of our collective
imaginations
1230
00:57:00,283 --> 00:57:01,367
could ever dream up.
1231
00:57:01,451 --> 00:57:05,121
A podcast
hosted by two wise trees.
1232
00:57:05,204 --> 00:57:08,291
Or a choir
of 2,000 young fathers.
1233
00:57:08,374 --> 00:57:11,085
Not even close.
We've got to get to Barbie Land.
1234
00:57:11,169 --> 00:57:14,380
Go! Find some blades now!
Just pick a direction and run!
1235
00:57:15,548 --> 00:57:19,218
I can practically feel
my heels lifting already. Yes!
1236
00:57:19,302 --> 00:57:22,096
This is what I was supposed
to do. Bring you back here.
1237
00:57:22,180 --> 00:57:23,848
-It feels right.
-It does.
1238
00:57:24,265 --> 00:57:25,308
Okay, this is...
1239
00:57:27,352 --> 00:57:28,353
That's strange.
1240
00:57:37,528 --> 00:57:40,948
Incoming brewski beer. Ohh...
1241
00:57:41,032 --> 00:57:42,992
So, that's our president,
with the beer.
1242
00:57:43,076 --> 00:57:45,953
And the cheering squad
is the Supreme Court.
1243
00:57:46,037 --> 00:57:48,373
This is so much better
than being president.
1244
00:57:49,165 --> 00:57:51,084
Something's weird today.
1245
00:57:51,668 --> 00:57:53,169
Hi, Barbie!
1246
00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:55,797
Oh, okay. Hi, Ken.
1247
00:57:55,880 --> 00:58:00,385
Have a brewski beer.
My big guy is thirsty.
1248
00:58:01,469 --> 00:58:02,679
Anyway...
1249
00:58:03,554 --> 00:58:04,639
...wait until you see
my Dreamhouse.
1250
00:58:04,722 --> 00:58:07,725
Everything I've bought and own
will totally inspire you.
1251
00:58:07,809 --> 00:58:09,185
And we can change clothes again!
1252
00:58:12,355 --> 00:58:14,065
-That's the Capitol.
-Ah!
1253
00:58:14,148 --> 00:58:15,692
-It's pink?
-Pink!
1254
00:58:15,775 --> 00:58:17,026
And that's--
1255
00:58:17,110 --> 00:58:18,653
(horses neigh)
1256
00:58:21,322 --> 00:58:24,117
These are the Dreamhouses.
This is where I live.
1257
00:58:24,242 --> 00:58:26,202
You can see through the houses.
1258
00:58:26,327 --> 00:58:28,329
So does each Barbie, like,
have their own house?
1259
00:58:28,454 --> 00:58:30,164
-Mm-hmm.
-That's cool.
1260
00:58:30,248 --> 00:58:31,749
Where do the Kens stay?
1261
00:58:32,625 --> 00:58:34,210
I don't know.
1262
00:58:34,293 --> 00:58:36,921
At first I thought
the Real World was run by men.
1263
00:58:37,004 --> 00:58:38,214
And then there was a minute
1264
00:58:38,297 --> 00:58:40,049
where I thought
it was run by horses.
1265
00:58:41,134 --> 00:58:44,095
But then I realized that horses
are just men extenders.
1266
00:58:44,178 --> 00:58:45,888
-Oh.
-Whoo.
1267
00:58:46,639 --> 00:58:48,474
Oh. I had that treehouse.
1268
00:58:48,558 --> 00:58:50,309
I saved up my allowance
to buy it.
1269
00:58:50,393 --> 00:58:54,230
I've never seen a car like that
before. What happened here?
1270
00:58:55,273 --> 00:58:57,942
Everything,
basically everything exists
1271
00:58:58,025 --> 00:59:00,778
to expand and elevate
the presence of men.
1272
00:59:00,862 --> 00:59:02,655
-That's amazing.
-That's beautiful.
1273
00:59:02,739 --> 00:59:04,073
-I know.
-Barbie's here.
1274
00:59:04,198 --> 00:59:05,074
Uh-oh.
1275
00:59:05,158 --> 00:59:06,826
-Ken?
-Look who's here.
1276
00:59:08,578 --> 00:59:09,746
What have you done?
1277
00:59:10,663 --> 00:59:11,706
What are you wearing?
1278
00:59:13,249 --> 00:59:15,960
Don't question it.
Just roll with it, tiny baby.
1279
00:59:16,043 --> 00:59:17,920
-Tiny baby.
-Don't call me baby.
1280
00:59:18,004 --> 00:59:19,922
What about mini-baby?
Like this mini-fridge.
1281
00:59:20,006 --> 00:59:20,882
(kens laugh)
1282
00:59:20,965 --> 00:59:22,091
No, Ken.
1283
00:59:22,175 --> 00:59:25,970
This is my Dreamhouse.
It is my Dreamhouse! It's mine!
1284
00:59:26,053 --> 00:59:28,055
No, this is no longer
Barbie's Dreamhouse.
1285
00:59:28,139 --> 00:59:33,352
This shall henceforth be known
as Ken's Mojo Dojo Casa House.
1286
00:59:33,728 --> 00:59:35,605
You don't have to say dojo
and house.
1287
00:59:35,688 --> 00:59:36,773
And casa...
1288
00:59:36,856 --> 00:59:39,108
But you do
because it feels good. Try it.
1289
00:59:39,192 --> 00:59:41,402
-Mojo Dojo Casa--
-No, girls. Don't say it.
1290
00:59:41,486 --> 00:59:43,446
Mojo Dojo Casa House.
1291
00:59:43,529 --> 00:59:45,198
(laughs)
1292
00:59:45,323 --> 00:59:46,908
Give it to me straight.
How weird is it?
1293
00:59:46,991 --> 00:59:49,911
Whoa, boss,
these Mojo Dojo Casa Houses
1294
00:59:49,994 --> 00:59:52,246
are literally flying
off the shelves.
1295
00:59:52,455 --> 00:59:56,375
The kids are clamoring for them.
Ken is on T-shirts, mugs.
1296
00:59:56,459 --> 00:59:58,503
-It's the number one tattoo.
-Oh, no.
1297
00:59:58,586 --> 01:00:01,506
Warner Bros. have started
auditions for the Ken movie,
1298
01:00:01,631 --> 01:00:04,967
which is already
a blockbuster hit. (laughs)
1299
01:00:05,510 --> 01:00:07,220
It's happening. That thing
we could never imagine.
1300
01:00:07,303 --> 01:00:08,763
If we don't get my words lady...
1301
01:00:08,846 --> 01:00:09,514
Executive Assistant.
1302
01:00:09,597 --> 01:00:10,765
My Executive Words Lady
1303
01:00:10,848 --> 01:00:12,058
and someone
who's probably her daughter
1304
01:00:12,141 --> 01:00:13,476
back here and close the portal,
1305
01:00:13,601 --> 01:00:15,061
our worlds could be altered
forever.
1306
01:00:15,144 --> 01:00:16,938
Well, what does it matter
if it's Barbie or Ken?
1307
01:00:17,021 --> 01:00:18,105
The money is pouring in.
1308
01:00:18,397 --> 01:00:20,525
Shame on you,
Executive Number Two.
1309
01:00:20,608 --> 01:00:22,652
You think I spent
my entire life in boardrooms
1310
01:00:22,735 --> 01:00:23,861
because of a bottom line?
1311
01:00:24,237 --> 01:00:25,363
No! I got into this business
1312
01:00:25,446 --> 01:00:27,657
because of little girls
and their dreams.
1313
01:00:27,782 --> 01:00:29,617
In the least creepy way
possible.
1314
01:00:30,201 --> 01:00:33,037
Now, blade faster.
Time is running out.
1315
01:00:33,120 --> 01:00:35,498
Look, I'm just having
some brewski beers
1316
01:00:35,665 --> 01:00:37,834
at my Mojo Dojo Casa House.
1317
01:00:38,376 --> 01:00:39,460
-(gasping)
-Ken!
1318
01:00:39,585 --> 01:00:41,212
You can stay if you want,
1319
01:00:41,295 --> 01:00:42,630
as my bride wife,
1320
01:00:42,713 --> 01:00:45,758
or my long-term-low-
commitment-distance girlfriend.
1321
01:00:45,842 --> 01:00:47,176
What do you say?
1322
01:00:47,885 --> 01:00:49,262
Brewski beer me?
1323
01:00:49,637 --> 01:00:52,014
I will not brewski beer you.
1324
01:00:52,098 --> 01:00:54,183
Ha ha ha! That's fine.
1325
01:00:54,892 --> 01:00:56,519
You know, now that you Barbies
aren't around to run everything,
1326
01:00:56,644 --> 01:00:57,937
we can do our hair
however we like.
1327
01:00:58,020 --> 01:00:58,980
I have hats.
1328
01:00:59,063 --> 01:01:02,733
Where are my hungry boys?
Who wants snacks?
1329
01:01:03,317 --> 01:01:04,652
Barbie,
I am so happy to see you.
1330
01:01:04,735 --> 01:01:05,945
Can you believe
what is happening?
1331
01:01:06,028 --> 01:01:07,572
I know. Isn't it great?
1332
01:01:08,197 --> 01:01:10,199
Anyone need a brewski beer?
1333
01:01:10,283 --> 01:01:12,994
What are you doing?
You're a doctor.
1334
01:01:13,077 --> 01:01:14,620
I like being
a helpful decoration.
1335
01:01:14,704 --> 01:01:17,623
And Allan likes to help me give
all the Kens foot massages.
1336
01:01:17,707 --> 01:01:18,875
No, I don't like that.
1337
01:01:18,958 --> 01:01:19,959
We love it.
1338
01:01:20,376 --> 01:01:23,129
I'm so blotto-faced day-drunk
right now.
1339
01:01:23,212 --> 01:01:24,463
Ditto same-same that.
1340
01:01:24,630 --> 01:01:26,257
I like not having to make
any decisions.
1341
01:01:26,340 --> 01:01:29,093
It's like a spa day
for my brain. Forever.
1342
01:01:29,635 --> 01:01:30,887
What is wrong with them?
1343
01:01:30,970 --> 01:01:32,346
We just explained to them
the immaculate,
1344
01:01:32,430 --> 01:01:33,890
impeccable seamless garment
of logic
1345
01:01:34,015 --> 01:01:35,474
that is patriarchy,
and they crumbled.
1346
01:01:35,558 --> 01:01:36,475
Oh, my God.
1347
01:01:36,559 --> 01:01:37,685
This is like in the 1500s
1348
01:01:37,768 --> 01:01:39,520
with the indigenous people
and smallpox.
1349
01:01:39,645 --> 01:01:41,022
They had no defenses
against it.
1350
01:01:41,105 --> 01:01:43,900
Yeah. Buckle up, babe.
(chuckles)
1351
01:01:44,358 --> 01:01:47,653
Because Barbie Land
is now Ken Land.
1352
01:01:47,737 --> 01:01:50,239
And it's gonna be just like
Century City in Los Angeles,
1353
01:01:50,364 --> 01:01:53,492
because they had it all
figured out in Century City.
1354
01:01:53,618 --> 01:01:55,995
The minute you get
out of your car, you're like,
1355
01:01:56,078 --> 01:01:58,289
"I can't believe
how great this place is!"
1356
01:01:58,664 --> 01:02:01,125
No, no, no. They don't have it
figured out in Century City
1357
01:02:01,208 --> 01:02:03,210
because we failed them.
1358
01:02:03,294 --> 01:02:05,379
No! You failed me!
1359
01:02:11,427 --> 01:02:13,930
Out there I was somebody.
1360
01:02:15,890 --> 01:02:17,642
And when I walked
down the street...
1361
01:02:19,769 --> 01:02:22,521
...people respected me
just for who I am.
1362
01:02:26,275 --> 01:02:29,487
One lady,
she even asked me for the time.
1363
01:02:29,570 --> 01:02:30,446
No way!
1364
01:02:30,529 --> 01:02:31,948
Way. (chuckles)
1365
01:02:34,742 --> 01:02:36,202
And if it weren't
for these technicalities
1366
01:02:36,285 --> 01:02:38,704
like MBAs, medical degrees,
1367
01:02:38,788 --> 01:02:43,751
and I don't know, swim lessons,
I could have ruled that world.
1368
01:02:43,876 --> 01:02:45,670
But I don't need
any of those things here.
1369
01:02:51,467 --> 01:02:54,929
Here I'm just a dude.
And you know what?
1370
01:02:59,266 --> 01:03:00,267
That's enough.
1371
01:03:00,768 --> 01:03:01,727
TV remote?
1372
01:03:06,107 --> 01:03:07,274
Which one is it?
1373
01:03:07,358 --> 01:03:08,442
(whispers)
It's that one right there.
1374
01:03:10,194 --> 01:03:12,530
Call me Mister Ken President
Prime Minister, ma'am.
1375
01:03:12,613 --> 01:03:13,739
Let's recap
all the amazing changes
1376
01:03:13,864 --> 01:03:15,366
and innovations
thanks to the Kens.
1377
01:03:15,449 --> 01:03:16,117
The Nobel Prize
1378
01:03:16,242 --> 01:03:18,160
in horses goes to--
1379
01:03:18,285 --> 01:03:19,328
Ken!
1380
01:03:19,412 --> 01:03:21,956
(audience, chanting)
Ken! Ken! Ken! Ken! Ken!
1381
01:03:23,165 --> 01:03:25,668
Wow. And now
you're making it permanent
1382
01:03:25,751 --> 01:03:29,255
with a special election
to change the Constitution.
1383
01:03:29,338 --> 01:03:30,673
That's right. In just 48 hours,
1384
01:03:30,798 --> 01:03:31,882
all the Kens will head
to the polls
1385
01:03:31,966 --> 01:03:33,509
and vote
to change the Constitution
1386
01:03:33,634 --> 01:03:34,343
to a government
1387
01:03:34,427 --> 01:03:36,762
for the Kens, of the Kens,
and by the Kens!
1388
01:03:36,846 --> 01:03:38,472
(cymbals crash)
1389
01:03:38,556 --> 01:03:41,726
(synthesizer beat)
1390
01:03:41,809 --> 01:03:43,561
You can't do this.
1391
01:03:43,853 --> 01:03:44,812
This is Barbie Land.
1392
01:03:44,895 --> 01:03:47,398
The Barbies worked hard
and they dreamed hard
1393
01:03:47,523 --> 01:03:49,734
to make it
everything that it is. You--
1394
01:03:50,359 --> 01:03:53,612
You can't just undo it in a day.
1395
01:03:53,738 --> 01:03:55,990
Literally and figuratively,
watch me.
1396
01:03:57,408 --> 01:04:00,327
Now, if you'll excuse me...
1397
01:04:01,328 --> 01:04:04,790
...this is my Mojo Dojo
Casa House, it's not...
1398
01:04:05,499 --> 01:04:08,711
...Barbie's Mojo Dojo
Casa House.
1399
01:04:10,004 --> 01:04:11,005
Right?
1400
01:04:15,384 --> 01:04:16,802
How's that feel?
1401
01:04:20,347 --> 01:04:23,059
It is not fun, is it?
1402
01:04:24,435 --> 01:04:26,729
(all) It's boys' night!
1403
01:04:26,812 --> 01:04:29,440
(cheering)
1404
01:04:42,203 --> 01:04:44,246
Every night is boys' night.
1405
01:04:48,209 --> 01:04:51,087
(Kens, chanting)
Go, Ken! Go, Ken! Go, Ken!
1406
01:04:51,170 --> 01:04:53,089
(cheering)
1407
01:04:56,675 --> 01:05:00,638
Barbie! Take your lady fashions
with you.
1408
01:05:00,721 --> 01:05:04,058
Take your "Celebrate Disco"
Bell Bottoms...
1409
01:05:04,809 --> 01:05:05,476
(Barbie) Oh!
1410
01:05:05,559 --> 01:05:08,187
...and your Ice Capades
Pretty Practice Suit
1411
01:05:08,270 --> 01:05:09,897
and Dazzling Show Skirt.
1412
01:05:09,980 --> 01:05:11,607
-(gasps)
-These are archival.
1413
01:05:11,690 --> 01:05:14,527
Your Pajama Jam
in Amsterdam sets.
1414
01:05:14,944 --> 01:05:15,694
No!
1415
01:05:15,778 --> 01:05:18,322
And your Pretty Paisley
Palazzo Pants!
1416
01:05:19,740 --> 01:05:22,618
-Not the Palazzos!
-And get out!
1417
01:05:22,701 --> 01:05:25,704
(wailing)
1418
01:05:25,788 --> 01:05:27,248
Maybe this could fit me.
1419
01:05:27,331 --> 01:05:30,376
(sobbing)
1420
01:05:30,459 --> 01:05:31,335
Honey.
1421
01:05:31,418 --> 01:05:34,088
Why did you wish me
to your messed-up world
1422
01:05:34,171 --> 01:05:38,217
using your complicated
human thoughts and feelings?
1423
01:05:38,592 --> 01:05:41,428
-What?
-Barbie Land was perfect before.
1424
01:05:42,429 --> 01:05:44,473
I was perfect before.
1425
01:05:45,141 --> 01:05:48,727
I'm so sorry.
I wasn't trying to do anything.
1426
01:05:48,811 --> 01:05:50,104
Don't apologize.
1427
01:05:50,855 --> 01:05:52,356
Don't blame my mom.
1428
01:05:52,439 --> 01:05:54,108
Sasha, that's sweet.
1429
01:05:54,191 --> 01:05:57,194
Maybe you wished us.
Maybe it's your fault, Barbie.
1430
01:05:57,278 --> 01:05:58,487
No, I didn't wish anything.
1431
01:05:58,612 --> 01:06:01,365
I've never wanted anything
to change.
1432
01:06:01,824 --> 01:06:07,204
Oh, honey, that's life.
It's all change.
1433
01:06:08,122 --> 01:06:09,165
That's...
1434
01:06:09,623 --> 01:06:11,208
That's terrifying.
1435
01:06:15,629 --> 01:06:16,463
I don't want that.
1436
01:06:17,965 --> 01:06:20,593
Not my life. No, thank you.
1437
01:06:20,676 --> 01:06:24,013
Just, no, I don't want this.
1438
01:06:30,519 --> 01:06:32,938
I'm just gonna sit here
and wait and hope
1439
01:06:33,022 --> 01:06:35,774
that one of the more
leadership-oriented Barbies
1440
01:06:35,858 --> 01:06:37,776
just snaps out of it
1441
01:06:37,860 --> 01:06:39,945
and does something
about this whole mess.
1442
01:06:40,029 --> 01:06:42,406
I really understand
this feeling.
1443
01:06:42,489 --> 01:06:45,576
It's basically, like, being
a human person all the time--
1444
01:06:45,659 --> 01:06:47,745
Please just leave me here.
Just leave me.
1445
01:06:47,870 --> 01:06:51,123
Go back to your messed-up world
and just leave me to mine.
1446
01:06:51,790 --> 01:06:53,918
-So, you're just gonna give up?
-Yes.
1447
01:06:58,839 --> 01:07:00,007
Okay.
1448
01:07:00,507 --> 01:07:01,884
You know,
I almost feel bad for you,
1449
01:07:01,967 --> 01:07:04,470
but you are exactly
what I thought you were.
1450
01:07:05,721 --> 01:07:06,764
Um...
1451
01:07:08,057 --> 01:07:09,683
Let's go, honey. Let's just...
1452
01:07:09,808 --> 01:07:10,976
Okay, how do we--
how do you expect--
1453
01:07:11,060 --> 01:07:12,645
Do everything we did
in reverse.
1454
01:07:14,772 --> 01:07:18,400
Unbelievable. Come on, Mom.
She doesn't deserve you.
1455
01:07:23,489 --> 01:07:26,283
This is the lowest
I've ever been.
1456
01:07:26,367 --> 01:07:29,286
Emotionally and physically.
1457
01:07:30,829 --> 01:07:32,915
(girl) Okay, kids,
it's time to run out
1458
01:07:32,998 --> 01:07:34,708
and get the new
Depression Barbie.
1459
01:07:34,833 --> 01:07:36,627
She wears sweatpants
all day and night.
1460
01:07:36,961 --> 01:07:39,088
She spent seven hours today
on Instagram,
1461
01:07:39,171 --> 01:07:41,298
looking at her estranged
best friend's engagement photos,
1462
01:07:41,382 --> 01:07:43,342
while eating a family-size bag
of Starbursts.
1463
01:07:43,425 --> 01:07:45,511
And now her jaw is killing her.
1464
01:07:45,636 --> 01:07:48,430
And she's going to watch
the BBC's Pride and Prejudice
1465
01:07:48,514 --> 01:07:50,766
for the seventh time
until she falls asleep.
1466
01:07:50,849 --> 01:07:52,268
Situation of our families
is such
1467
01:07:52,351 --> 01:07:53,394
that any alliance between us
1468
01:07:53,477 --> 01:07:56,063
must be regarded as a highly
reprehensible connection.
1469
01:07:56,146 --> 01:07:59,149
(girl) Anxiety, panic attacks,
and OCD sold separately.
1470
01:07:59,984 --> 01:08:02,361
Barbie. Barbie, wake up.
1471
01:08:02,653 --> 01:08:04,280
-Hey.
-Weird.
1472
01:08:05,072 --> 01:08:06,782
I'm like you now.
1473
01:08:06,865 --> 01:08:08,951
Ugly and unwanted.
1474
01:08:09,868 --> 01:08:10,744
Thanks.
1475
01:08:11,787 --> 01:08:13,205
Let's get her in the back.
Come on.
1476
01:08:13,289 --> 01:08:14,164
One, two...
1477
01:08:14,957 --> 01:08:16,667
-Isn't this great?
-Yes.
1478
01:08:16,750 --> 01:08:18,294
Wait until you see the boat.
1479
01:08:18,377 --> 01:08:19,503
The boat.
1480
01:08:21,171 --> 01:08:22,840
Beautiful countryside.
1481
01:08:24,174 --> 01:08:26,135
He said
he could see through me
1482
01:08:26,218 --> 01:08:29,847
I spent four years prostrate
To the higher mind
1483
01:08:29,930 --> 01:08:32,766
Got my paper and I was free
1484
01:08:34,018 --> 01:08:38,731
I went to the doctor,
I went to the mountains
1485
01:08:38,814 --> 01:08:43,319
I looked to the children,
I drank from the fountains
1486
01:08:43,402 --> 01:08:45,279
We interrupt this broadcast
to bring you
1487
01:08:45,362 --> 01:08:48,282
our new radio station only
playing Ken's favorite song.
1488
01:08:48,365 --> 01:08:51,410
I want to push you around
1489
01:08:51,493 --> 01:08:54,246
Well, I will, well, I will
1490
01:08:54,330 --> 01:08:56,206
Turn this song off,
for Chrissake!
1491
01:08:56,290 --> 01:08:58,000
(screaming)
1492
01:09:03,047 --> 01:09:04,506
-Who are you?
-I'm Allan.
1493
01:09:04,631 --> 01:09:06,467
Oh, you are Allan. That's great.
1494
01:09:06,633 --> 01:09:08,344
Don't tell the Kens.
I'm trying to escape.
1495
01:09:08,427 --> 01:09:10,137
I cannot sit
on one more leather couch.
1496
01:09:10,220 --> 01:09:11,597
It's gonna break my spirit.
1497
01:09:11,930 --> 01:09:13,515
As soon as they figure out
how to build that wall sideways
1498
01:09:13,640 --> 01:09:14,892
and not just up,
1499
01:09:15,601 --> 01:09:17,686
no one is gonna be able
to get in or out.
1500
01:09:17,770 --> 01:09:19,438
So if we want to leave,
we better make a run for it.
1501
01:09:19,521 --> 01:09:22,024
No, Allan. You can't go. Having
a Barbie in the Real World
1502
01:09:22,107 --> 01:09:24,026
is what caused all these
problems in the first place.
1503
01:09:24,109 --> 01:09:26,153
Not one person would care
if Allan was in the Real World.
1504
01:09:26,236 --> 01:09:29,239
In fact, it's happened before.
All of N'SYNC, Allan.
1505
01:09:29,907 --> 01:09:31,784
Yes, even him, so come on!
1506
01:09:31,867 --> 01:09:32,743
Hey, you there.
1507
01:09:34,036 --> 01:09:35,579
-What do we do?
-Just get in the car
1508
01:09:35,662 --> 01:09:37,206
and keep it singing.
Hey, man.
1509
01:09:37,289 --> 01:09:38,582
-Be ready for anything.
-What?
1510
01:09:39,041 --> 01:09:40,042
Who are you?
1511
01:09:40,125 --> 01:09:42,127
I'm Allan. I'm Ken's buddy.
1512
01:09:43,045 --> 01:09:44,129
All of his clothes fit me.
1513
01:09:47,341 --> 01:09:48,384
Get in the car!
1514
01:09:52,221 --> 01:09:53,180
(Allan) You want a piece?
1515
01:09:53,263 --> 01:09:54,640
Wait, you don't have
a driver's license.
1516
01:09:54,723 --> 01:09:55,974
This car doesn't have
an engine.
1517
01:09:56,058 --> 01:09:56,809
(groans) Fine.
1518
01:10:01,188 --> 01:10:02,606
What are you doing?
We gotta go.
1519
01:10:02,689 --> 01:10:05,150
We have to go back.
Barbie Land needs saving.
1520
01:10:05,234 --> 01:10:06,610
Barbie needs saving.
1521
01:10:07,027 --> 01:10:08,278
What? You hate Barbie!
1522
01:10:08,362 --> 01:10:10,614
But you don't. You've always
believed in what she could be.
1523
01:10:10,697 --> 01:10:14,118
Yeah, well, I was wrong.
Barbie gave up. The Kens won.
1524
01:10:14,827 --> 01:10:16,120
You have to try.
1525
01:10:16,203 --> 01:10:17,955
Even if you can't
make it perfect,
1526
01:10:18,038 --> 01:10:20,124
-you can make it better.
-I can't make anything better.
1527
01:10:20,207 --> 01:10:21,417
I'm the one
who ruined Barbie Land
1528
01:10:21,500 --> 01:10:22,960
with my stupid drawings
in the first place.
1529
01:10:23,043 --> 01:10:24,878
They're not stupid!
They're amazing!
1530
01:10:27,381 --> 01:10:29,133
You like my drawings?
1531
01:10:29,216 --> 01:10:31,927
They're weird
and dark and crazy.
1532
01:10:32,511 --> 01:10:34,263
Everything
you pretend not to be.
1533
01:10:36,223 --> 01:10:39,977
I am, I am. I'm weird
and I'm dark and I'm crazy.
1534
01:10:40,394 --> 01:10:42,187
(Allan, men fighting)
1535
01:10:42,771 --> 01:10:45,232
Easy. Easy...
1536
01:10:46,942 --> 01:10:49,319
Okay. You want some more Allan?
1537
01:10:49,403 --> 01:10:50,404
No!
1538
01:10:51,738 --> 01:10:53,031
We have to get out of here
right now.
1539
01:10:53,115 --> 01:10:55,033
Shut up, Allan!
We're going back.
1540
01:10:55,742 --> 01:10:57,077
Let's go get my doll.
1541
01:11:01,331 --> 01:11:02,958
I'll never get out of here.
1542
01:11:03,500 --> 01:11:04,626
Where do we find Barbie?
1543
01:11:04,710 --> 01:11:06,128
There's only one place
she'd be.
1544
01:11:08,422 --> 01:11:09,631
You're a writer.
1545
01:11:09,715 --> 01:11:12,843
This is your Nobel Prize.
Remember winning it?
1546
01:11:12,926 --> 01:11:14,261
It's useless
trying to deprogram her.
1547
01:11:14,344 --> 01:11:15,637
I already did
everything I could.
1548
01:11:15,721 --> 01:11:18,974
Oh, my God. I don't even know
how I got here.
1549
01:11:19,057 --> 01:11:20,517
I don't deserve this.
1550
01:11:20,642 --> 01:11:23,312
Um, I'd like to thank Ken.
1551
01:11:24,271 --> 01:11:25,647
Thank you, Ken.
1552
01:11:26,148 --> 01:11:28,025
I love you, Ken.
1553
01:11:28,108 --> 01:11:29,651
The fork in my soup is this,
Barb.
1554
01:11:29,735 --> 01:11:32,613
Why didn't the brainwashing
work on you?
1555
01:11:32,696 --> 01:11:35,866
My exposure to the Real World
must have made me immune.
1556
01:11:35,991 --> 01:11:38,410
Either you're brainwashed,
or you're weird and ugly.
1557
01:11:38,494 --> 01:11:39,703
There is no in between.
1558
01:11:39,828 --> 01:11:41,121
Sing it, sister.
1559
01:11:41,205 --> 01:11:42,122
Well, get ready, kids.
1560
01:11:42,206 --> 01:11:44,917
Because in forty-eight hours,
Barbie Land becomes Ken Land.
1561
01:11:45,000 --> 01:11:45,709
(Allan) Come on, gang.
1562
01:11:45,792 --> 01:11:47,419
We'll find Barbie
at the top of these stairs.
1563
01:11:47,503 --> 01:11:49,463
The Kens. They've found us.
1564
01:11:51,215 --> 01:11:52,633
No, no, no!
1565
01:11:52,966 --> 01:11:53,967
Ken!
1566
01:11:54,259 --> 01:11:55,511
Ken?
1567
01:11:59,014 --> 01:12:00,974
-Hello?
-Hmm?
1568
01:12:01,058 --> 01:12:02,684
-Humans. We're fine.
-(Barbies) Ah.
1569
01:12:03,185 --> 01:12:04,937
-And Allan.
-(Barbies) Eh.
1570
01:12:05,020 --> 01:12:07,981
Come into my Weirdhouse.
Hi! I'm Weird Barbie.
1571
01:12:08,065 --> 01:12:09,691
I'm in the splits,
I have a funky haircut,
1572
01:12:09,775 --> 01:12:10,859
and I smell like basement.
1573
01:12:10,943 --> 01:12:13,654
Oh, my God.
I had a Weird Barbie.
1574
01:12:13,737 --> 01:12:14,530
Yeah, you did.
1575
01:12:14,696 --> 01:12:16,865
You make them weird
by playing too hard.
1576
01:12:16,949 --> 01:12:17,908
That's cool.
1577
01:12:18,283 --> 01:12:20,536
That's Sugar Daddy Ken.
And Earring Magic Ken.
1578
01:12:20,661 --> 01:12:22,079
Mattel discontinued them.
1579
01:12:22,162 --> 01:12:23,288
-Sugar Daddy?
-No, no, no.
1580
01:12:23,372 --> 01:12:24,706
I'm not a sugar daddy.
1581
01:12:24,790 --> 01:12:27,251
This is Sugar,
and I'm her daddy.
1582
01:12:27,584 --> 01:12:29,253
And I have an earring.
A magic earring.
1583
01:12:29,336 --> 01:12:31,421
These were actual Kens.
1584
01:12:32,047 --> 01:12:34,007
More discontinued Barbies.
1585
01:12:34,091 --> 01:12:36,552
Growing Up Skipper? May I?
1586
01:12:36,635 --> 01:12:37,719
-Okay.
-Watch this.
1587
01:12:39,429 --> 01:12:41,515
-Her boobs grow.
-Why would they do that?
1588
01:12:41,640 --> 01:12:43,475
And Barbie Video Girl.
1589
01:12:43,559 --> 01:12:46,645
I have a TV in my back.
You know whose dream that is?
1590
01:12:46,728 --> 01:12:48,981
Nobody. Nobody's dream.
1591
01:12:49,064 --> 01:12:50,899
And that's Barbie Barbie,
of course.
1592
01:12:50,983 --> 01:12:53,151
She's not dead. She's just
having an existential crisis.
1593
01:12:53,402 --> 01:12:54,987
Okay, come on.
1594
01:12:56,238 --> 01:12:57,114
Hey.
1595
01:12:58,156 --> 01:12:59,449
What's wrong?
1596
01:13:03,120 --> 01:13:06,832
I'm not pretty anymore.
1597
01:13:08,500 --> 01:13:10,252
What? You're so pretty.
1598
01:13:10,711 --> 01:13:13,964
I'm not
Stereotypical Barbie pretty.
1599
01:13:14,047 --> 01:13:14,965
(narrator)
Note to the filmmakers,
1600
01:13:15,048 --> 01:13:16,842
Margot Robbie is
the wrong person to cast
1601
01:13:16,925 --> 01:13:17,926
if you want to make this point.
1602
01:13:18,010 --> 01:13:19,595
But you're beautiful.
1603
01:13:20,387 --> 01:13:25,642
It's not just that. I'm not...
smart enough to be interesting.
1604
01:13:25,976 --> 01:13:26,768
You're so smart.
1605
01:13:26,852 --> 01:13:29,521
I can't do brain surgery,
I've never flown a plane.
1606
01:13:31,440 --> 01:13:32,899
I'm not the president.
1607
01:13:34,401 --> 01:13:36,820
No one on the Supreme Court
is me.
1608
01:13:38,572 --> 01:13:43,452
I'm not good enough
for anything.
1609
01:13:49,791 --> 01:13:52,753
It is literally impossible
to be a woman.
1610
01:13:54,421 --> 01:13:57,924
You are so beautiful
and so smart,
1611
01:13:58,008 --> 01:14:01,470
and it kills me that you don't
think you're good enough.
1612
01:14:01,637 --> 01:14:05,724
Like we have to always be
extraordinary.
1613
01:14:06,767 --> 01:14:11,063
But somehow
we're always doing it wrong.
1614
01:14:13,523 --> 01:14:15,442
You have to be thin
but not too thin,
1615
01:14:15,525 --> 01:14:17,569
and you can never say
you want to be thin.
1616
01:14:17,653 --> 01:14:19,821
You have to say
you want to be healthy,
1617
01:14:19,905 --> 01:14:23,075
but also you have to be thin.
1618
01:14:23,533 --> 01:14:26,286
You have to have money,
but you can't ask for money
1619
01:14:26,370 --> 01:14:28,080
because that's crass.
1620
01:14:29,247 --> 01:14:29,956
(sighs)
1621
01:14:30,040 --> 01:14:32,084
You have to be a boss
but you can't be mean.
1622
01:14:32,167 --> 01:14:35,295
You have to lead, but you can't
squash other people's ideas.
1623
01:14:35,379 --> 01:14:36,922
You're supposed to love
being a mother,
1624
01:14:37,005 --> 01:14:39,174
but don't talk about your kids
all the damn time.
1625
01:14:39,257 --> 01:14:40,842
You have to be a career woman
1626
01:14:40,926 --> 01:14:43,679
but also always be looking out
for other people.
1627
01:14:44,262 --> 01:14:47,265
You have to answer for men's
bad behavior, which is insane,
1628
01:14:47,349 --> 01:14:50,310
but if you point that out,
you're accused of complaining.
1629
01:14:50,394 --> 01:14:52,938
You're supposed to stay pretty
for men but not so pretty
1630
01:14:53,021 --> 01:14:54,272
that you tempt them too much
1631
01:14:54,356 --> 01:14:55,649
or that you threaten
other women
1632
01:14:55,732 --> 01:14:57,651
because you're supposed to be
a part of the sisterhood
1633
01:14:57,734 --> 01:14:59,403
but always stand out.
1634
01:14:59,486 --> 01:15:02,114
And always be grateful.
1635
01:15:02,239 --> 01:15:03,990
But never forget
that the system is rigged,
1636
01:15:04,074 --> 01:15:05,534
so find a way
to acknowledge that
1637
01:15:05,659 --> 01:15:07,244
but also always be grateful.
1638
01:15:07,703 --> 01:15:09,663
You have to never get old,
1639
01:15:09,746 --> 01:15:12,541
never be rude, never show off,
1640
01:15:12,666 --> 01:15:14,876
never be selfish,
never fall down,
1641
01:15:14,960 --> 01:15:16,878
never fail, never show fear,
1642
01:15:16,962 --> 01:15:18,714
never get out of line.
1643
01:15:18,839 --> 01:15:21,299
It's too hard,
it's too contradictory,
1644
01:15:21,383 --> 01:15:23,885
and nobody gives you a medal
or says thank you.
1645
01:15:24,177 --> 01:15:25,303
And it turns out, in fact,
1646
01:15:25,387 --> 01:15:27,180
that not only
are you doing everything wrong
1647
01:15:27,264 --> 01:15:29,725
but also
everything is your fault.
1648
01:15:30,892 --> 01:15:32,811
(sighs)
1649
01:15:34,813 --> 01:15:38,316
I'm just so tired
of watching myself
1650
01:15:38,400 --> 01:15:42,237
and every single other woman
1651
01:15:42,320 --> 01:15:46,700
tie herself into knots
so that people will like us.
1652
01:15:50,245 --> 01:15:52,956
And if all of that...
1653
01:15:53,039 --> 01:15:55,792
is also true for a doll...
1654
01:15:57,127 --> 01:16:01,089
just representing a woman...
1655
01:16:03,717 --> 01:16:06,428
...then I don't even know.
1656
01:16:12,476 --> 01:16:13,351
Wait.
1657
01:16:14,728 --> 01:16:16,354
I did write a book.
1658
01:16:17,022 --> 01:16:18,690
It's like I've been in a dream,
1659
01:16:19,149 --> 01:16:22,110
where I was somehow
really invested
1660
01:16:22,194 --> 01:16:25,113
in the Zack Snyder cut
of Justice League.
1661
01:16:26,865 --> 01:16:29,826
But what you said
broke me out of it.
1662
01:16:30,660 --> 01:16:31,578
Really?
1663
01:16:31,995 --> 01:16:32,704
Yeah.
1664
01:16:32,829 --> 01:16:34,664
You're back. She's back.
1665
01:16:34,748 --> 01:16:37,042
By giving voice to the cognitive
dissonance required
1666
01:16:37,125 --> 01:16:38,627
to be a woman
under the patriarchy,
1667
01:16:38,710 --> 01:16:40,003
you robbed it of its power.
1668
01:16:40,128 --> 01:16:40,837
Yes.
1669
01:16:42,422 --> 01:16:43,757
Wow, I just said all of that.
1670
01:16:43,840 --> 01:16:46,384
Hell, yes, White Savior Barbie!
1671
01:16:46,718 --> 01:16:49,721
No, it was your mom.
Your mom did the saving.
1672
01:16:49,805 --> 01:16:51,348
We have to stop the Kens.
1673
01:16:51,431 --> 01:16:54,100
And you need to say all of those
things to the other Barbies.
1674
01:16:54,184 --> 01:16:55,310
-That's the key.
-Got it.
1675
01:16:55,393 --> 01:16:56,812
But, how are we gonna
get the Barbies
1676
01:16:56,895 --> 01:16:57,854
away from their Kens?
1677
01:16:57,938 --> 01:16:59,940
We have experience
with a world like this one.
1678
01:17:00,023 --> 01:17:01,483
Do you have a map
of Barbie Land?
1679
01:17:01,817 --> 01:17:03,568
What do you think?
1680
01:17:06,446 --> 01:17:07,948
-Wow.
-Thanks. I built it.
1681
01:17:08,031 --> 01:17:09,032
Okay, here's the deal.
1682
01:17:09,115 --> 01:17:10,867
It's not just about
how they see us,
1683
01:17:10,951 --> 01:17:12,661
it's about
how they see themselves.
1684
01:17:12,744 --> 01:17:15,622
Ken Land contains the seeds
of its own destruction.
1685
01:17:15,705 --> 01:17:18,208
First we have to get the Barbies
away from their Kens.
1686
01:17:18,291 --> 01:17:21,878
We could use a decoy Barbie
who pretends to be brainwashed.
1687
01:17:21,962 --> 01:17:23,255
-That should be you.
-Cool.
1688
01:17:30,220 --> 01:17:32,681
(Sasha) Distract them by appearing
helpless and confused.
1689
01:17:32,764 --> 01:17:34,724
Kens cannot resist
a damsel in distress.
1690
01:17:34,808 --> 01:17:37,519
You have to make them believe
that you're complacent.
1691
01:17:37,644 --> 01:17:38,895
That they have the power.
1692
01:17:38,979 --> 01:17:42,107
And when their guard is down,
you take the power back.
1693
01:17:45,068 --> 01:17:47,112
The influence that Porsche 356
1694
01:17:47,195 --> 01:17:49,281
has had on the motoring world
as a whole,
1695
01:17:49,406 --> 01:17:50,490
it can't be overstated.
1696
01:17:50,615 --> 01:17:52,826
Oh! Photoshop is so hard!
1697
01:17:52,909 --> 01:17:55,203
I just don't understand
how to use the Select tool.
1698
01:17:55,287 --> 01:17:57,038
Honey, you can only use
the Select tool
1699
01:17:57,122 --> 01:17:58,540
if the layer is highlighted.
1700
01:17:58,665 --> 01:17:59,457
Let me show you.
1701
01:17:59,541 --> 01:18:00,834
My tiny head is just swimming
1702
01:18:00,917 --> 01:18:03,128
with technical jargon
like color bands
1703
01:18:03,211 --> 01:18:05,922
and magnetic lassos
and bit maps.
1704
01:18:06,006 --> 01:18:08,091
Do you think that you and your
strong arms can explain...
1705
01:18:08,174 --> 01:18:10,176
-Oh! What's happening?
-Allan, go around!
1706
01:18:10,260 --> 01:18:11,219
(President Barbie)
Aah!
1707
01:18:12,470 --> 01:18:13,763
-Oh, but what about Ken?
-No, no, no!
1708
01:18:13,847 --> 01:18:15,891
-No, but I love him!
-Come on, Allan!
1709
01:18:16,766 --> 01:18:19,185
Hey!
What's gonna happen to Ken?
1710
01:18:19,269 --> 01:18:20,687
Just listen.
1711
01:18:20,896 --> 01:18:21,980
You have to be their mommies
1712
01:18:22,063 --> 01:18:23,440
but not remind them
of their mommy.
1713
01:18:23,523 --> 01:18:25,817
Any power you have
must be masked under a giggle.
1714
01:18:25,901 --> 01:18:27,277
(bell rings)
1715
01:18:28,486 --> 01:18:29,487
What happened?
1716
01:18:29,654 --> 01:18:30,822
One minute I was president,
1717
01:18:30,906 --> 01:18:33,992
and the next I was cutting
a Ken steak for him.
1718
01:18:34,075 --> 01:18:36,077
Welcome back, Madam President.
1719
01:18:36,161 --> 01:18:38,747
Then we'll recruit the now
unbrainwashed Barbies
1720
01:18:38,830 --> 01:18:39,497
to our cause.
1721
01:18:39,581 --> 01:18:41,458
They can be the new decoys.
1722
01:18:41,541 --> 01:18:43,752
You can tell him that you've
never seen The Godfather.
1723
01:18:44,044 --> 01:18:46,379
And that you'd love them
to explain it to you.
1724
01:18:46,463 --> 01:18:49,007
Ooh, are you guys
watching The God Father?
1725
01:18:49,090 --> 01:18:50,300
The Godfather.
1726
01:18:50,383 --> 01:18:51,301
I've never seen it.
1727
01:18:51,384 --> 01:18:53,219
Oh, my God.
You've never seen The Godfather?
1728
01:18:53,303 --> 01:18:55,889
This movie is a rich blend
of Coppola's aesthetic genius
1729
01:18:55,972 --> 01:18:57,349
and a triumph for Robert Evans
1730
01:18:57,432 --> 01:18:59,225
and the architecture
of the '70s studio system.
1731
01:18:59,309 --> 01:19:00,310
Can you start the movie over
1732
01:19:00,393 --> 01:19:01,728
and just talk
through the whole thing?
1733
01:19:01,811 --> 01:19:03,897
You have to find a way
to reject men's advances
1734
01:19:04,022 --> 01:19:05,315
without damaging their egos.
1735
01:19:05,398 --> 01:19:06,942
Because if you say yes to them,
you're a tramp,
1736
01:19:07,025 --> 01:19:08,985
but if you say no to them,
you're a prude.
1737
01:19:09,069 --> 01:19:10,070
(bell rings)
1738
01:19:10,737 --> 01:19:12,155
I don't wanna touch a foot.
1739
01:19:12,280 --> 01:19:13,365
No, you don't.
1740
01:19:13,448 --> 01:19:15,867
Another one,
be confused about money.
1741
01:19:15,951 --> 01:19:18,328
I just have all my money
in a savings account.
1742
01:19:18,411 --> 01:19:19,913
That's totally wrong.
You need treasury bonds,
1743
01:19:19,996 --> 01:19:21,247
corporate bonds, CDs.
1744
01:19:21,331 --> 01:19:23,124
No one has CDs anymore.
1745
01:19:23,208 --> 01:19:25,835
Oh, sweetheart, you are so cute
when you're confused.
1746
01:19:25,961 --> 01:19:27,629
But no, not music.
1747
01:19:27,712 --> 01:19:30,131
CD stands for
Certificate of Deposit.
1748
01:19:30,215 --> 01:19:32,676
Stephen Malkmus really harnessed
the acerbic talk-singing
1749
01:19:32,759 --> 01:19:34,344
of Lou Reed
with post-punk influences
1750
01:19:34,427 --> 01:19:36,346
-such as Wire and The Fall.
-(bell rings)
1751
01:19:36,429 --> 01:19:38,223
What am I wearing?
I would never choose this.
1752
01:19:38,306 --> 01:19:40,767
Because you're a physicist.
Do you want some pants?
1753
01:19:40,850 --> 01:19:41,851
Yeah.
1754
01:19:41,935 --> 01:19:43,687
(bell rings)
1755
01:19:43,770 --> 01:19:44,980
Welcome back, Barbie.
1756
01:19:45,063 --> 01:19:48,191
Gee, I am so awkward
and don't feel pretty at all,
1757
01:19:48,274 --> 01:19:50,110
and will anyone ever like me?
1758
01:19:50,193 --> 01:19:51,486
(Sasha) Or distract them
with the old standby.
1759
01:19:51,611 --> 01:19:53,780
Wearing glasses so they can
discover that you're pretty.
1760
01:19:54,155 --> 01:19:56,366
-May I?
-Sure. Go ahead.
1761
01:20:00,495 --> 01:20:03,206
There. Now we can see
your beautiful face.
1762
01:20:04,290 --> 01:20:06,418
And then there's pretending
to be terrible
1763
01:20:06,501 --> 01:20:08,003
at every sport ever.
1764
01:20:08,086 --> 01:20:10,005
Here, let me show you.
1765
01:20:10,088 --> 01:20:11,840
Here, let me show you.
1766
01:20:11,923 --> 01:20:14,092
-Here, let me show you.
-Here, let me show you.
1767
01:20:14,175 --> 01:20:16,094
Here, let us show you.
1768
01:20:16,177 --> 01:20:18,680
We'll do this
until every single Barbie
1769
01:20:18,763 --> 01:20:21,433
is deprogrammed and ready
to take back Barbie Land.
1770
01:20:21,516 --> 01:20:22,559
-Yes!
-Yes!
1771
01:20:22,976 --> 01:20:23,810
Yeah!
1772
01:20:26,187 --> 01:20:27,439
(whistles)
1773
01:20:28,189 --> 01:20:32,652
Hey! Tomorrow the Kens vote
to change the Constitution,
1774
01:20:32,736 --> 01:20:34,112
so we have to get there first.
1775
01:20:34,195 --> 01:20:35,655
The final stage of our plan.
1776
01:20:35,822 --> 01:20:38,074
To turn the Kens
against each other.
1777
01:20:38,158 --> 01:20:40,368
Now that they think
they have power over you,
1778
01:20:40,452 --> 01:20:42,620
you make them question whether
they have enough power
1779
01:20:42,704 --> 01:20:43,663
over each other.
1780
01:20:44,247 --> 01:20:46,416
What if this doesn't work?
1781
01:20:46,499 --> 01:20:50,837
What if he doesn't...
like me anymore?
1782
01:20:52,088 --> 01:20:55,050
-He likes you.
-He was really upset.
1783
01:20:56,259 --> 01:20:58,094
Because he likes you.
1784
01:20:58,178 --> 01:20:59,804
And because he knows deep down
1785
01:20:59,888 --> 01:21:01,973
that you don't like him
the same way.
1786
01:21:02,057 --> 01:21:03,767
It still doesn't mean
I want to hurt him.
1787
01:21:05,185 --> 01:21:06,936
He took your house.
1788
01:21:07,062 --> 01:21:08,188
He brainwashed your friends.
1789
01:21:08,271 --> 01:21:10,315
He wants to control
the government.
1790
01:21:10,398 --> 01:21:11,691
True.
1791
01:21:11,775 --> 01:21:13,610
-Girl.
-Yeah.
1792
01:21:14,027 --> 01:21:15,445
-Wow.
-Yeah.
1793
01:21:15,945 --> 01:21:17,906
It's like I'm a woman already.
1794
01:21:18,281 --> 01:21:19,824
Welcome.
1795
01:21:19,908 --> 01:21:22,368
Is this what it's like? Wow.
1796
01:21:22,452 --> 01:21:23,286
(Sasha's mother)
It's time.
1797
01:21:23,870 --> 01:21:24,954
I'm ready.
1798
01:21:25,872 --> 01:21:26,915
Thank you.
1799
01:21:27,415 --> 01:21:28,792
Here I go.
1800
01:21:35,131 --> 01:21:35,882
Hi.
1801
01:21:35,965 --> 01:21:38,009
(clatter)
1802
01:21:38,802 --> 01:21:40,220
-(bottles clink)
-(clunk)
1803
01:21:40,303 --> 01:21:41,012
(Ken) Ah!
1804
01:21:41,096 --> 01:21:42,931
(clatter)
1805
01:21:46,351 --> 01:21:48,853
Oh, hey.
You've caught me reading.
1806
01:21:48,937 --> 01:21:50,897
Oh.
1807
01:21:50,980 --> 01:21:52,315
-I've been thinking.
-Mm-hmm.
1808
01:21:52,398 --> 01:21:53,650
-Ken Land.
-Kendom.
1809
01:21:54,400 --> 01:21:55,485
-Kendom.
-Kendom Land.
1810
01:21:55,568 --> 01:21:57,278
-Land of the...
-Land of the free and the men.
1811
01:21:57,362 --> 01:21:58,947
Right. Well, this place is...
1812
01:21:59,072 --> 01:22:00,365
Kendom Land.
1813
01:22:00,448 --> 01:22:01,449
...really great.
1814
01:22:01,825 --> 01:22:04,327
And the Kens really
are just better at ruling
1815
01:22:04,410 --> 01:22:06,037
than the Barbies ever were.
1816
01:22:06,121 --> 01:22:08,873
Well, we just took patriarchy
and you know, made a patriarchy.
1817
01:22:08,957 --> 01:22:11,126
-Yeah, well, I was thinking...
-Yes?
1818
01:22:11,209 --> 01:22:15,004
I'm ready to be
your long-term-distance
1819
01:22:15,088 --> 01:22:17,090
low-commitment
casual girlfriend,
1820
01:22:17,173 --> 01:22:18,591
if you'll still have me.
1821
01:22:20,552 --> 01:22:21,761
Would you just hold on
for one second?
1822
01:22:21,845 --> 01:22:22,887
Oh, okay.
1823
01:22:28,309 --> 01:22:29,477
(Ken) Sublime!
1824
01:22:33,731 --> 01:22:35,692
I don't know. I'm gonna
have to think about that.
1825
01:22:35,775 --> 01:22:36,734
Oh.
1826
01:22:38,278 --> 01:22:39,070
Please?
1827
01:22:42,031 --> 01:22:42,991
Okay.
1828
01:22:43,324 --> 01:22:45,285
Come on in.
I'll play the guitar at you.
1829
01:22:45,368 --> 01:22:46,411
Oh, yay!
1830
01:22:48,079 --> 01:22:50,206
(guitar strums)
1831
01:22:58,047 --> 01:23:01,801
Said I don't know if I've
ever been good enough
1832
01:23:02,343 --> 01:23:04,220
I'm a little bit rusty
1833
01:23:04,304 --> 01:23:07,473
And I think
my head is cavin' in
1834
01:23:09,517 --> 01:23:13,646
And I don't know if I've
ever been really loved
1835
01:23:13,730 --> 01:23:15,565
By a hand
that's touched me
1836
01:23:15,648 --> 01:23:18,902
And I feel
like something's got to give
1837
01:23:19,402 --> 01:23:22,655
And I'm a little bit angry,
well
1838
01:23:23,114 --> 01:23:28,077
This ain't over,
no, not here, no
1839
01:23:30,246 --> 01:23:33,124
Not while I still
need you around
1840
01:23:34,584 --> 01:23:36,461
You don't owe me
1841
01:23:37,462 --> 01:23:39,672
We might change, yeah
1842
01:23:40,924 --> 01:23:44,427
Yeah,
we just might feel good
1843
01:23:44,552 --> 01:23:47,263
I wanna push you around
1844
01:23:47,347 --> 01:23:50,016
Well, I will, well, I will
1845
01:23:50,099 --> 01:23:52,852
I wanna push you down
1846
01:23:52,936 --> 01:23:55,271
Well, I will, well, I will
1847
01:23:55,355 --> 01:23:58,483
(Sasha's mother) This is
the final stage of our plan.
1848
01:23:58,983 --> 01:24:01,361
Give them their dream come true.
1849
01:24:01,736 --> 01:24:03,780
And at the peak
of their happiness,
1850
01:24:03,863 --> 01:24:07,367
when they think you actually
care about this song...
1851
01:24:10,078 --> 01:24:11,246
...you take it all away.
1852
01:24:12,163 --> 01:24:14,457
I will
1853
01:24:17,752 --> 01:24:19,295
(texting signal rings)
1854
01:24:21,381 --> 01:24:22,757
(Barbie laughs)
1855
01:24:24,842 --> 01:24:26,010
-Who are you texting?
-Huh?
1856
01:24:26,469 --> 01:24:27,762
Who are you texting?
1857
01:24:28,721 --> 01:24:31,766
-No one.
-Let me just... (chuckles)
1858
01:24:31,849 --> 01:24:32,934
Ken!
1859
01:24:33,268 --> 01:24:34,644
Sorry. One sec.
1860
01:24:36,437 --> 01:24:39,357
That's a beautiful song
that you're playing.
1861
01:24:39,440 --> 01:24:40,733
Did you write it?
1862
01:24:40,858 --> 01:24:42,819
Yes. You want to sit here
and watch me do it,
1863
01:24:42,944 --> 01:24:44,404
while I stare uncomfortably
into your eyes
1864
01:24:44,487 --> 01:24:45,280
for four and a half minutes?
1865
01:24:45,405 --> 01:24:46,447
I would love that.
1866
01:24:46,531 --> 01:24:47,323
Baby
1867
01:24:47,407 --> 01:24:48,324
Sorry, one sec.
1868
01:24:48,408 --> 01:24:50,410
I wanna push you around
1869
01:24:50,493 --> 01:24:51,244
Be right back.
1870
01:24:51,327 --> 01:24:55,081
Well, I will, well, I will,
I wanna push...
1871
01:24:55,164 --> 01:24:56,749
(Sasha's mother)
You play on their egos
1872
01:24:56,833 --> 01:24:58,084
and their petty jealousies,
1873
01:24:58,167 --> 01:25:00,044
and you turn them
against each other.
1874
01:25:00,128 --> 01:25:00,920
One sec.
1875
01:25:01,004 --> 01:25:03,089
I wanna take you
for granted
1876
01:25:03,214 --> 01:25:04,257
(ting)
1877
01:25:05,425 --> 01:25:06,426
Sorry.
1878
01:25:06,968 --> 01:25:10,722
While they're fighting,
we take back Barbie Land.
1879
01:25:12,807 --> 01:25:15,226
Does the title of
long-term-distance casual
1880
01:25:15,310 --> 01:25:17,520
low-commitment girlfriend
mean nothing?
1881
01:25:17,645 --> 01:25:18,563
What do we do?
1882
01:25:18,688 --> 01:25:21,691
We beach every individual
one of them off.
1883
01:25:21,774 --> 01:25:24,777
No. We go to war.
1884
01:25:25,945 --> 01:25:27,739
-Against the Barbies?
-No, against the Kens.
1885
01:25:27,864 --> 01:25:29,198
-But we are the Kens.
-The other Kens.
1886
01:25:29,282 --> 01:25:30,658
We should probably
call them something else
1887
01:25:30,742 --> 01:25:31,701
so it doesn't get confusing.
1888
01:25:31,784 --> 01:25:32,869
No, because we'll know
what we mean.
1889
01:25:32,994 --> 01:25:33,995
But when we're
on the battlefield
1890
01:25:34,078 --> 01:25:35,121
and you say
"Ken at four o'clock,"
1891
01:25:35,204 --> 01:25:36,789
how will I know if you mean
us Kens or the other Kens?
1892
01:25:36,873 --> 01:25:39,542
Because, my dudes,
we attack at ten o'clock
1893
01:25:39,667 --> 01:25:41,836
and take advantage
of the morning waves.
1894
01:25:41,919 --> 01:25:44,422
But not so early 'cause we're
gonna want to sleep in.
1895
01:25:44,505 --> 01:25:45,340
Right.
1896
01:25:45,465 --> 01:25:47,133
But what will we fight with?
We have no guns.
1897
01:25:47,216 --> 01:25:49,344
Tennis rackets and volleyballs.
1898
01:25:49,427 --> 01:25:50,970
And slap fights.
1899
01:25:51,054 --> 01:25:52,055
And beach offs.
1900
01:25:52,138 --> 01:25:53,973
-Yes.
-Oh, yeah.
1901
01:25:54,057 --> 01:25:55,975
(Ken laughs)
1902
01:25:59,812 --> 01:26:03,649
Doesn't seem to matter
what I do
1903
01:26:04,692 --> 01:26:07,111
I'm always number two
1904
01:26:08,279 --> 01:26:11,824
No one knows
how hard I tried
1905
01:26:12,700 --> 01:26:17,413
I, I have feelings
that I can't explain
1906
01:26:18,581 --> 01:26:21,042
Driving me insane
1907
01:26:22,085 --> 01:26:25,338
All my life been so polite
1908
01:26:25,421 --> 01:26:28,383
But I'll sleep alone tonight
1909
01:26:28,800 --> 01:26:30,635
'Cause I'm just Ken
1910
01:26:30,718 --> 01:26:33,763
Anywhere else I'd be a ten
1911
01:26:34,055 --> 01:26:38,017
Is it my destiny
to live and die
1912
01:26:38,101 --> 01:26:41,813
A life of blonde fragility
1913
01:26:42,647 --> 01:26:44,273
I'm just Ken
1914
01:26:44,357 --> 01:26:47,652
Where I see love
she sees a friend
1915
01:26:47,735 --> 01:26:49,737
What will it take for her
1916
01:26:49,862 --> 01:26:53,282
To see the man
behind the tan
1917
01:26:53,366 --> 01:26:55,243
And fight for me?
1918
01:27:02,667 --> 01:27:05,169
(Kens roar)
1919
01:27:05,253 --> 01:27:07,171
(groans)
1920
01:27:07,255 --> 01:27:08,756
(shouts)
1921
01:27:08,881 --> 01:27:10,466
(wails)
1922
01:27:10,591 --> 01:27:14,262
I'll see you
on the Malibu beach!
1923
01:27:14,345 --> 01:27:17,723
Charge!
1924
01:27:19,058 --> 01:27:20,476
Aah!
1925
01:27:28,568 --> 01:27:31,320
You can't, Ken,
you can't, Ken
1926
01:27:31,446 --> 01:27:32,572
You can't, Ken
1927
01:27:46,669 --> 01:27:48,045
Hah!
1928
01:27:59,265 --> 01:28:01,434
And now they destroy themselves.
1929
01:28:01,517 --> 01:28:02,310
You know what I think?
1930
01:28:02,393 --> 01:28:05,104
I think we should put
our freaking Constitution back.
1931
01:28:05,229 --> 01:28:06,647
-Yes.
-That's a great idea.
1932
01:28:12,987 --> 01:28:15,281
This is a real hornet's nest
in here.
1933
01:28:15,615 --> 01:28:16,991
Watch your flank.
1934
01:28:19,202 --> 01:28:21,078
-I got shot.
-That's impossible.
1935
01:28:21,704 --> 01:28:23,080
Are there real weapons here?
1936
01:28:23,164 --> 01:28:23,831
Nope.
1937
01:28:24,373 --> 01:28:27,376
I wanna know
what it's like to love
1938
01:28:27,460 --> 01:28:29,420
To be the real thing
1939
01:28:30,713 --> 01:28:32,089
Is it a crime?
1940
01:28:32,173 --> 01:28:36,886
Am I not hot
when I'm in my feelings?
1941
01:28:36,969 --> 01:28:43,392
And is my moment finally here,
or am I dreaming?
1942
01:28:44,519 --> 01:28:47,813
I'm no dreamer
1943
01:29:29,397 --> 01:29:30,523
Ken
1944
01:29:35,236 --> 01:29:36,153
Ken
1945
01:29:40,783 --> 01:29:43,828
Can you feel Ken-ergy?
1946
01:29:46,205 --> 01:29:47,415
Ken
1947
01:29:51,460 --> 01:29:54,797
They are, you are, we are
1948
01:29:55,131 --> 01:29:56,924
I'm just Ken
1949
01:29:57,008 --> 01:29:59,885
Anywhere else I'd be a ten
1950
01:30:00,303 --> 01:30:04,098
Is it my destiny
to live and die
1951
01:30:04,181 --> 01:30:07,852
A life of blonde fragility
1952
01:30:08,769 --> 01:30:10,563
I'm just Ken
1953
01:30:10,688 --> 01:30:13,983
Where I see love
she sees a friend
1954
01:30:14,066 --> 01:30:16,027
What will it take for her
1955
01:30:16,110 --> 01:30:19,614
To see the man
behind the tan
1956
01:30:19,780 --> 01:30:22,283
And fight for me?
1957
01:30:22,700 --> 01:30:23,743
I'm just Ken
1958
01:30:24,076 --> 01:30:25,995
And I'm enough
1959
01:30:26,078 --> 01:30:29,248
And I'm great at doing stuff
1960
01:30:29,999 --> 01:30:32,293
So, hey, check me out
1961
01:30:32,376 --> 01:30:34,503
Yeah, I'm just Ken
1962
01:30:36,422 --> 01:30:37,757
My name's Ken
1963
01:30:37,840 --> 01:30:39,759
And so am I
1964
01:30:39,842 --> 01:30:43,512
Put that manly hand in mine
1965
01:30:43,679 --> 01:30:45,890
So hey, world, check me out
1966
01:30:45,973 --> 01:30:48,434
Yeah, I'm just Ken
1967
01:30:50,436 --> 01:30:53,731
-Baby, I'm...
-Nobody else, nobody else
1968
01:30:53,814 --> 01:30:56,817
-...just Ken
-I'm just Ken
1969
01:30:57,818 --> 01:30:59,945
-Ken! Ken.
-Yeah?
1970
01:31:00,071 --> 01:31:01,530
Weren't we supposed
to vote today?
1971
01:31:01,656 --> 01:31:04,158
-What?
-To change the Constitution.
1972
01:31:04,241 --> 01:31:06,327
-It was today, wasn't it?
-Yeah.
1973
01:31:06,410 --> 01:31:08,871
(chatter)
1974
01:31:11,332 --> 01:31:13,334
(President Barbie)
Okay, ladies, let's do this.
1975
01:31:13,417 --> 01:31:17,088
All those in favor of letting
Barbie Land be Barbie Land,
1976
01:31:17,171 --> 01:31:18,422
say "Aye."
1977
01:31:18,756 --> 01:31:19,924
(all) Aye!
1978
01:31:20,007 --> 01:31:22,343
(cheering)
1979
01:31:33,771 --> 01:31:34,897
I'm so happy.
1980
01:31:34,980 --> 01:31:39,026
Go, Barbie! Go, Barbie!
Go, Barbie! Go, Barbie!
1981
01:31:39,110 --> 01:31:42,822
Go, Barbie! Go, Barbie!
Go, Barbie! Go, Barbie!
1982
01:31:54,458 --> 01:31:56,085
Is it just my imagination,
1983
01:31:56,168 --> 01:32:00,089
or did these Mojo Dojo
Casa Houses just get dreamier?
1984
01:32:01,257 --> 01:32:03,801
That's because they're
Dreamhouses, mother(bleep)--
1985
01:32:03,884 --> 01:32:04,760
-(gasping)
-That's right.
1986
01:32:04,844 --> 01:32:07,388
We've reinstated
the Barbie Land Constitution
1987
01:32:07,471 --> 01:32:08,305
to what it should be.
1988
01:32:08,389 --> 01:32:11,809
And restored all the Barbies'
brains and autonomy.
1989
01:32:11,892 --> 01:32:12,852
Yes!
1990
01:32:15,688 --> 01:32:18,232
And we seriously disinfected
those houses.
1991
01:32:18,315 --> 01:32:19,358
What do we do?
1992
01:32:21,444 --> 01:32:22,486
Kens!
1993
01:32:24,572 --> 01:32:25,948
Who are we attacking, sir?
1994
01:32:26,031 --> 01:32:26,699
No--
1995
01:32:28,909 --> 01:32:30,035
No--
1996
01:32:31,954 --> 01:32:33,414
Baah!
1997
01:32:33,497 --> 01:32:35,291
Don't look at me!
1998
01:32:36,542 --> 01:32:37,376
(whispering) Is he crying?
1999
01:32:38,085 --> 01:32:39,754
Just give us a minute.
2000
01:32:39,837 --> 01:32:41,714
(Ken sobbing)
2001
01:32:45,009 --> 01:32:48,304
-Ken.
-(sobbing)
2002
01:32:49,263 --> 01:32:50,431
Are you okay?
2003
01:32:50,514 --> 01:32:52,141
Yeah. Totally.
2004
01:32:52,224 --> 01:32:53,934
It's okay if you're crying.
2005
01:32:54,059 --> 01:32:56,395
You know, I cried, too.
It's actually kind of amazing.
2006
01:32:56,479 --> 01:32:58,814
I'm a liberated man.
I know crying is not weak.
2007
01:32:58,898 --> 01:33:00,024
Okay.
2008
01:33:02,568 --> 01:33:03,527
You wanna sit up for a minute?
2009
01:33:04,528 --> 01:33:06,447
Ah.
(coughs, sniffles)
2010
01:33:07,031 --> 01:33:08,157
(exhales)
2011
01:33:09,116 --> 01:33:10,159
This...
2012
01:33:11,118 --> 01:33:12,912
It was hard running stuff.
2013
01:33:14,079 --> 01:33:15,247
I didn't love it.
2014
01:33:17,082 --> 01:33:18,167
I get it.
2015
01:33:21,337 --> 01:33:22,463
(sputters)
2016
01:33:22,546 --> 01:33:24,673
And those mini-fridges
are so small.
2017
01:33:24,757 --> 01:33:25,424
Mm-hmm.
2018
01:33:25,508 --> 01:33:26,675
You could only fit
a six pack in them.
2019
01:33:26,759 --> 01:33:30,054
And the freezers
are basically useless.
2020
01:33:31,889 --> 01:33:33,390
To be honest, when I found out
2021
01:33:33,474 --> 01:33:35,100
that patriarchy wasn't
about horses,
2022
01:33:35,184 --> 01:33:36,644
I lost interest anyway.
2023
01:33:37,937 --> 01:33:39,230
That's okay.
2024
01:33:44,401 --> 01:33:46,654
I always thought
this would be our house.
2025
01:33:49,907 --> 01:33:51,033
Oh.
2026
01:33:51,116 --> 01:33:53,744
(sobs, sniffles)
2027
01:33:54,161 --> 01:33:56,747
-Ken.
-(whimpering)
2028
01:33:57,456 --> 01:34:00,125
-I think I owe you an apology.
-Huh?
2029
01:34:00,209 --> 01:34:02,127
I'm really sorry
I took you for granted.
2030
01:34:02,211 --> 01:34:03,337
Oh.
2031
01:34:05,005 --> 01:34:07,216
Not every night
had to be girls' night.
2032
01:34:10,928 --> 01:34:12,429
Thank you for saying that.
2033
01:34:14,056 --> 01:34:14,974
Thank you.
2034
01:34:17,101 --> 01:34:20,312
Oh. I didn't mean
to suggest, uh...
2035
01:34:20,396 --> 01:34:22,940
I just don't know who I am
without you.
2036
01:34:24,275 --> 01:34:25,901
You're Ken.
2037
01:34:26,861 --> 01:34:29,989
But it's "Barbie and Ken."
2038
01:34:31,699 --> 01:34:34,285
There is no just "Ken."
2039
01:34:35,327 --> 01:34:37,204
That's why I was created.
2040
01:34:37,288 --> 01:34:42,710
I only exist
within the warmth of your gaze.
2041
01:34:44,086 --> 01:34:50,134
Without it, I'm just another
blond guy who can't do flips.
2042
01:34:56,515 --> 01:34:57,766
(gasping)
2043
01:34:59,059 --> 01:35:03,898
Maybe it's time
to discover who Ken is.
2044
01:35:04,523 --> 01:35:06,859
-Okay. I think I get it now.
-Okay.
2045
01:35:06,942 --> 01:35:09,361
No, no, no!
This isn't the answer.
2046
01:35:11,447 --> 01:35:12,823
-(gasp)
-Ouch.
2047
01:35:12,907 --> 01:35:13,908
(Ken) I feel so stupid.
2048
01:35:13,991 --> 01:35:15,242
-No.
-No.
2049
01:35:15,326 --> 01:35:17,244
I look so stupid.
2050
01:35:17,328 --> 01:35:20,497
-Well, yeah.
-I look so stupid!
2051
01:35:20,623 --> 01:35:23,000
-No!
-So cool. You look so cool.
2052
01:35:23,959 --> 01:35:26,378
Okay. Ken,
you have to figure out
2053
01:35:26,462 --> 01:35:28,213
who you are without me.
2054
01:35:29,924 --> 01:35:30,883
Why?
2055
01:35:30,966 --> 01:35:32,760
You're not your girlfriend.
2056
01:35:32,843 --> 01:35:35,679
You're not your house,
you're not your mink.
2057
01:35:35,930 --> 01:35:37,514
-Beach?
-Nope.
2058
01:35:37,640 --> 01:35:39,642
You're not even beach.
2059
01:35:40,017 --> 01:35:43,687
Maybe all the things
that you thought made you you
2060
01:35:43,771 --> 01:35:47,733
aren't... really... you.
2061
01:35:52,613 --> 01:35:54,990
Maybe it's Barbie and...
2062
01:35:57,159 --> 01:35:58,953
...it's Ken.
2063
01:36:01,956 --> 01:36:05,084
Ken... is...
2064
01:36:06,835 --> 01:36:07,670
...me?
2065
01:36:07,753 --> 01:36:08,921
Yes.
2066
01:36:09,046 --> 01:36:11,507
Ken... is me!
2067
01:36:13,008 --> 01:36:14,551
And I'm Barbie.
2068
01:36:17,638 --> 01:36:18,722
Ken...
2069
01:36:20,391 --> 01:36:21,392
...is me!
2070
01:36:21,767 --> 01:36:22,476
Ken is me!
2071
01:36:22,643 --> 01:36:23,978
-Ken is me!
-Ken is me!
2072
01:36:24,645 --> 01:36:26,188
I don't even care
about being Ken anymore.
2073
01:36:26,271 --> 01:36:27,523
I just miss my friend Barbie!
2074
01:36:27,606 --> 01:36:29,233
-That's cool!
-Barbie!
2075
01:36:29,316 --> 01:36:30,943
(whispers)
I'm right here.
2076
01:36:31,026 --> 01:36:32,027
Ken!
2077
01:36:36,448 --> 01:36:38,617
I want you to have it.
2078
01:36:38,993 --> 01:36:41,161
Oh. That's nice.
2079
01:36:48,669 --> 01:36:51,380
We were only fighting because
we didn't know who we were.
2080
01:36:53,716 --> 01:36:58,387
Ken is... me!
2081
01:37:01,265 --> 01:37:03,267
(laughing)
2082
01:37:06,937 --> 01:37:08,022
Ken is right.
2083
01:37:08,689 --> 01:37:11,191
It's just so hard
to be a leader.
2084
01:37:11,275 --> 01:37:13,068
-You know?
-That's my boss.
2085
01:37:13,152 --> 01:37:15,362
It's-- Aah! Oh.
2086
01:37:15,446 --> 01:37:17,364
Midge, gosh.
2087
01:37:17,448 --> 01:37:19,199
I thought we discontinued her.
2088
01:37:19,283 --> 01:37:21,285
(panting)
2089
01:37:21,368 --> 01:37:24,121
Look,
do you know how many times
2090
01:37:24,204 --> 01:37:27,332
I've wanted to stand up
in a board meeting and just say,
2091
01:37:27,416 --> 01:37:28,876
"Can we just tickle each other?"
2092
01:37:29,501 --> 01:37:30,794
-Really?
-Let's have a company retreat
2093
01:37:30,878 --> 01:37:32,296
and just tickle each other.
2094
01:37:32,421 --> 01:37:34,381
Someone get me. Someone get me.
2095
01:37:36,633 --> 01:37:38,343
I love being tickled.
2096
01:37:38,427 --> 01:37:41,472
No, no, no. Don't hug me.
Don't hug me.
2097
01:37:44,266 --> 01:37:45,726
But thanks to the Barbies,
2098
01:37:45,809 --> 01:37:49,646
I, too, can now relieve myself
of this heavy existential burden
2099
01:37:49,730 --> 01:37:52,941
while holding on to
the very real title of CEO.
2100
01:37:53,776 --> 01:37:56,320
And we can restore
everything in Barbie Land
2101
01:37:56,487 --> 01:37:58,072
to exactly the way it was.
2102
01:37:58,155 --> 01:38:01,200
-Mister Mattel, I just--
-Please. Call me Mother.
2103
01:38:01,825 --> 01:38:03,077
No, thank you.
2104
01:38:03,160 --> 01:38:04,953
I don't think
that things should go back
2105
01:38:05,037 --> 01:38:06,121
to the way that they were.
2106
01:38:06,205 --> 01:38:10,459
No Barbie or Ken should be
living in the shadows.
2107
01:38:10,584 --> 01:38:11,502
Or Allan.
2108
01:38:12,461 --> 01:38:13,670
-Hey.
-Me?
2109
01:38:13,754 --> 01:38:15,547
-Yeah.
-Hello.
2110
01:38:15,672 --> 01:38:16,632
I just want to say,
2111
01:38:16,715 --> 01:38:18,175
I'm sorry
we called you Weird Barbie
2112
01:38:18,300 --> 01:38:19,802
behind your back
and also to your face.
2113
01:38:19,885 --> 01:38:22,096
That's okay. I'm owning it.
2114
01:38:22,179 --> 01:38:23,972
Would you like a job
in my cabinet?
2115
01:38:24,056 --> 01:38:26,183
May I please have sanitation?
2116
01:38:27,309 --> 01:38:28,143
It's yours.
2117
01:38:28,393 --> 01:38:30,395
-Yeah, thank you.
-All right.
2118
01:38:30,479 --> 01:38:31,730
-Madam President.
-Oh.
2119
01:38:32,397 --> 01:38:35,067
Please, may the Kens have
one Supreme Court Justice?
2120
01:38:35,150 --> 01:38:39,196
I can't do that. But maybe
a lower circuit court judgeship.
2121
01:38:39,321 --> 01:38:41,156
We accept.
As long as we can wear robes.
2122
01:38:41,281 --> 01:38:43,450
(narrator) Well, the Kens
have to start somewhere.
2123
01:38:43,534 --> 01:38:45,410
And one day the Kens will have
2124
01:38:45,494 --> 01:38:47,830
as much power and influence
in Barbie Land
2125
01:38:47,913 --> 01:38:50,749
as women have in the Real World.
2126
01:38:50,833 --> 01:38:51,959
No, I don't want to.
2127
01:38:52,042 --> 01:38:53,252
-Just go!
-I can't.
2128
01:38:53,335 --> 01:38:55,379
-Grow up and go.
-I have an idea.
2129
01:38:56,338 --> 01:38:58,090
Tell me your secret dream,
child.
2130
01:38:58,173 --> 01:39:00,300
Okay,
what about Ordinary Barbie?
2131
01:39:01,552 --> 01:39:04,513
She's not extraordinary.
She's not president of anything,
2132
01:39:04,638 --> 01:39:05,389
or maybe she is.
2133
01:39:05,472 --> 01:39:07,724
Maybe she's a mom.
Maybe she's not.
2134
01:39:07,808 --> 01:39:11,061
Because it's okay
to just want to be a mom,
2135
01:39:11,145 --> 01:39:13,438
or to wanna be president
or a mom who is president.
2136
01:39:13,564 --> 01:39:15,190
Or not a mom
who's also not president.
2137
01:39:15,274 --> 01:39:17,359
She just has a flattering top,
2138
01:39:17,442 --> 01:39:18,819
and she wants
to get through the day
2139
01:39:18,902 --> 01:39:21,488
feeling kinda good
about herself.
2140
01:39:23,824 --> 01:39:26,118
That's a... terrible idea.
2141
01:39:26,201 --> 01:39:27,744
Yeah,
that's going to make money.
2142
01:39:27,828 --> 01:39:31,206
Oh. Ordinary Barbie.
I love it. Fantastic.
2143
01:39:31,331 --> 01:39:32,457
Okay, great.
2144
01:39:32,541 --> 01:39:33,959
-Great.
-Cool.
2145
01:39:34,042 --> 01:39:35,127
-Yes.
-We good?
2146
01:39:35,210 --> 01:39:36,545
I think we're good, right?
2147
01:39:37,045 --> 01:39:38,380
All right, let's begin the work
2148
01:39:38,463 --> 01:39:40,757
to close the portal
between our two worlds.
2149
01:39:41,300 --> 01:39:43,260
Hey, what about Barbie?
2150
01:39:43,343 --> 01:39:44,261
What do you mean?
2151
01:39:44,344 --> 01:39:46,096
Yeah, what about Barbie?
2152
01:39:46,180 --> 01:39:49,016
What's her ending?
What does she get?
2153
01:39:50,309 --> 01:39:52,978
Well, that's easy.
She's in love with Ken.
2154
01:39:53,061 --> 01:39:54,062
(Barbies) Aw.
2155
01:39:54,146 --> 01:39:55,606
That is not her ending.
2156
01:39:55,689 --> 01:39:57,024
(grunts)
2157
01:39:57,816 --> 01:39:59,818
-I'm not in love with Ken.
-(Barbies) Oh.
2158
01:39:59,902 --> 01:40:00,944
What do you want?
2159
01:40:02,988 --> 01:40:04,406
I don't know. I'm...
2160
01:40:06,575 --> 01:40:09,328
I'm not really sure
where I belong anymore.
2161
01:40:14,208 --> 01:40:15,959
I don't think I have an ending.
2162
01:40:16,043 --> 01:40:18,003
(Ruth) That was always the point.
2163
01:40:18,086 --> 01:40:21,340
I created you
so wouldn't have an ending.
2164
01:40:22,883 --> 01:40:24,092
It's you.
2165
01:40:26,637 --> 01:40:28,347
You're Ruth from Mattel.
2166
01:40:28,847 --> 01:40:31,183
Baby, I am Mattel.
2167
01:40:31,266 --> 01:40:34,061
Until the IRS got to me,
but that's another movie.
2168
01:40:34,144 --> 01:40:35,103
So, you're...
2169
01:40:35,187 --> 01:40:38,440
Ruth Handler.
Inventor of Barbie.
2170
01:40:38,523 --> 01:40:39,650
-(gasping)
-What?
2171
01:40:39,733 --> 01:40:40,734
That's so cool.
2172
01:40:40,817 --> 01:40:43,403
Her ghost keeps an office
on the 17th floor.
2173
01:40:43,487 --> 01:40:44,404
-What?
-What?
2174
01:40:44,488 --> 01:40:45,364
You guys,
2175
01:40:45,447 --> 01:40:49,034
you think the lady who invented
Barbie looks like Barbie?
2176
01:40:49,117 --> 01:40:51,203
Ha!
I'm a five-foot-nothing grandma
2177
01:40:51,286 --> 01:40:52,913
with a double mastectomy
2178
01:40:52,996 --> 01:40:55,123
(laughing)
and tax evasion issues.
2179
01:40:55,207 --> 01:40:57,000
Nobody looks like Barbie,
2180
01:40:57,751 --> 01:41:01,213
except, of course, Barbie.
Take a bow, honey.
2181
01:41:03,257 --> 01:41:05,926
I don't really feel
like Barbie anymore.
2182
01:41:10,055 --> 01:41:11,890
Come, walk with me.
2183
01:41:32,035 --> 01:41:33,078
Thank you.
2184
01:41:35,080 --> 01:41:36,248
Thank you, Barbie.
2185
01:41:38,375 --> 01:41:39,710
Thank you.
2186
01:41:49,303 --> 01:41:51,263
I'm not really sure
what I'm supposed to do now.
2187
01:41:51,346 --> 01:41:53,849
I've always been
Stereotypical Barbie,
2188
01:41:53,932 --> 01:41:57,311
and I don't think I'm really
good at anything else.
2189
01:41:57,394 --> 01:41:59,396
You saved Barbie Land
from patriarchy.
2190
01:41:59,479 --> 01:42:01,982
That was very much
a group effort.
2191
01:42:02,357 --> 01:42:04,860
And you helped that mother
and daughter connect.
2192
01:42:05,319 --> 01:42:06,903
They really helped each other.
2193
01:42:08,363 --> 01:42:10,824
Maybe
you're Self-Effacing Barbie?
2194
01:42:12,701 --> 01:42:14,661
Maybe I'm not Barbie anymore.
2195
01:42:23,879 --> 01:42:27,674
You understand that humans
only have one ending.
2196
01:42:27,758 --> 01:42:31,928
Ideas live forever,
humans not so much.
2197
01:42:32,012 --> 01:42:33,347
You know that, right?
2198
01:42:33,430 --> 01:42:34,389
I do.
2199
01:42:34,473 --> 01:42:37,642
Being a human
can be pretty uncomfortable.
2200
01:42:38,977 --> 01:42:40,187
I know.
2201
01:42:40,270 --> 01:42:44,608
Humans make things up,
like patriarchy and Barbie
2202
01:42:44,691 --> 01:42:47,486
just to deal
with how uncomfortable it is.
2203
01:42:48,278 --> 01:42:49,988
I understand that.
2204
01:42:50,072 --> 01:42:51,406
And then you die.
2205
01:42:53,784 --> 01:42:54,826
Yeah.
2206
01:42:56,620 --> 01:42:57,954
Yeah.
2207
01:43:04,378 --> 01:43:08,507
I want to be
a part of the people
2208
01:43:08,632 --> 01:43:10,509
that make meaning.
2209
01:43:11,885 --> 01:43:13,887
Not the thing that's made.
2210
01:43:16,390 --> 01:43:19,267
I want to do the imagining.
I don't wanna be the idea.
2211
01:43:19,351 --> 01:43:20,852
Does that make sense?
2212
01:43:21,603 --> 01:43:23,730
I always knew that Barbie
would surprise me,
2213
01:43:23,855 --> 01:43:26,775
but I never expected this.
2214
01:43:26,858 --> 01:43:30,529
Do you give me permission
to become human?
2215
01:43:31,405 --> 01:43:33,365
You don't need my permission.
2216
01:43:33,448 --> 01:43:37,119
But you're the creator.
You... Don't you control me?
2217
01:43:37,202 --> 01:43:38,745
I can't control you
2218
01:43:38,829 --> 01:43:42,082
any more than I can control
my own daughter.
2219
01:43:42,165 --> 01:43:44,584
I named you after her,
Barbara.
2220
01:43:44,918 --> 01:43:48,505
And I always hoped for you
like I hoped for her.
2221
01:43:49,589 --> 01:43:50,966
We mothers stand still
2222
01:43:51,049 --> 01:43:55,554
so our daughters can look back
to see how far they've come.
2223
01:44:00,809 --> 01:44:03,061
So, being human's not
something I need to...
2224
01:44:04,062 --> 01:44:08,191
ask for or even want?
I can just...
2225
01:44:10,152 --> 01:44:12,404
It's something
that I just discover I am?
2226
01:44:14,573 --> 01:44:17,159
I can't in good conscience
let you take this leap
2227
01:44:17,242 --> 01:44:19,327
without you knowing
what it means.
2228
01:44:23,123 --> 01:44:24,416
Take my hands.
2229
01:44:31,298 --> 01:44:32,924
Now close your eyes.
2230
01:44:43,351 --> 01:44:44,769
Now feel.
2231
01:44:52,110 --> 01:44:55,238
(heart beating)
2232
01:46:02,430 --> 01:46:03,807
Yes.
2233
01:46:13,567 --> 01:46:15,318
(sea gull screeches)
2234
01:46:16,736 --> 01:46:18,321
(narrator) So, Barbie left behind
2235
01:46:18,405 --> 01:46:21,324
the pastels and plastics
of Barbie Land
2236
01:46:21,408 --> 01:46:24,035
for the pastels and plastics
of Los Angeles.
2237
01:46:24,452 --> 01:46:26,871
Okay. Thanks for the lift.
2238
01:46:27,664 --> 01:46:28,623
You got this.
2239
01:46:28,707 --> 01:46:30,041
I'm really proud of you.
2240
01:46:30,125 --> 01:46:33,670
Estoy muy orguoso de ti.
2241
01:46:33,753 --> 01:46:35,255
Orgulloso.
2242
01:46:35,338 --> 01:46:38,508
Orgulloso... Orgulloso de ti.
2243
01:46:38,633 --> 01:46:40,594
There you go. Close enough.
2244
01:46:40,677 --> 01:46:42,721
You guys are the best.
Thank you. Thank you.
2245
01:46:42,804 --> 01:46:45,390
Okay. Let's do this.
2246
01:46:45,473 --> 01:46:46,266
Sí se puede.
2247
01:46:46,349 --> 01:46:47,559
That's a political statement.
2248
01:46:47,642 --> 01:46:48,893
That's appropriation, Dad.
2249
01:46:48,977 --> 01:46:50,145
(dad) Whoo-hoo!
2250
01:46:50,562 --> 01:46:52,022
(mom)
We'll be here when you're done.
2251
01:46:52,105 --> 01:46:52,856
-We love you!
-You got this!
2252
01:46:52,939 --> 01:46:53,648
Bye!
2253
01:46:53,732 --> 01:46:55,817
-Okay.
-We love you!
2254
01:47:04,326 --> 01:47:05,201
Hi.
2255
01:47:05,994 --> 01:47:06,786
Name?
2256
01:47:06,870 --> 01:47:10,624
Oh, uh,
Handler, comma, Barbara.
2257
01:47:12,542 --> 01:47:14,085
And what are you here for
today, Barbara?
2258
01:47:16,171 --> 01:47:18,340
I'm here to see my gynecologist.
2259
01:47:19,716 --> 01:47:21,718
("Barbie World"
by Ice Spice and Nicki Minaj plays)
2260
01:49:26,843 --> 01:49:28,845
("What Was I Made For?"
by Billie Eilish plays)
158565
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