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1
00:00:02,843 --> 00:00:04,427
[Jill]
Previously on Kidding...
2
00:00:04,511 --> 00:00:05,802
Bought the house
next to Jill's.
3
00:00:05,885 --> 00:00:07,760
[Seb] And why would you
do that?
4
00:00:07,843 --> 00:00:09,219
[Jeff] They need me.
5
00:00:09,302 --> 00:00:11,344
[gas hissing]
6
00:00:11,427 --> 00:00:13,219
[Jeff] Did Will do that?
7
00:00:13,302 --> 00:00:15,427
When I told him to stop
stealing my debit card.
8
00:00:15,511 --> 00:00:17,135
[Scott] I'm sick, Dee Dee.
9
00:00:17,219 --> 00:00:18,677
I don't know
what's wrong with me.
10
00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:20,552
Name one happy child
of divorce.
11
00:00:20,636 --> 00:00:22,010
Have you ever seen
the movie Robocop?
12
00:00:22,094 --> 00:00:24,677
We need versions of him
we can control.
13
00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:27,260
In six weeks,
I'm gonna be dead.
14
00:00:27,344 --> 00:00:29,718
Then why are you getting
a pedicure?
15
00:00:29,802 --> 00:00:32,760
Get me Tara Lipinski.
16
00:00:35,094 --> 00:00:36,843
Tear that little shit apart,
Jeffrey!
17
00:00:36,927 --> 00:00:40,177
Tear that little shit apart,
Jeffrey!
18
00:00:41,511 --> 00:00:43,885
[Seb] Yeah, that's it!
19
00:00:43,968 --> 00:00:46,552
He's coming back for you!
Come on!
20
00:00:46,636 --> 00:00:48,885
Don't take
that shit, Jeff!
21
00:00:48,968 --> 00:00:50,511
Get him!
22
00:00:50,594 --> 00:00:52,177
Come on!
Get him!
23
00:00:52,260 --> 00:00:55,135
Knock his teeth
down his throat!
24
00:01:02,718 --> 00:01:05,636
♪ tranquil music ♪
25
00:01:05,718 --> 00:01:10,802
♪♪♪
26
00:01:43,469 --> 00:01:44,927
Derrell...
27
00:01:54,552 --> 00:01:56,427
[woman] Check out
the new you.
28
00:01:57,344 --> 00:01:58,968
[Jeff chuckles]
29
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:01,469
My wife's always saying
I should indulge,
30
00:02:01,552 --> 00:02:03,094
but they're expensive,
aren't they?
31
00:02:03,177 --> 00:02:05,718
My manager likes me
to close a sale
32
00:02:05,802 --> 00:02:08,260
by bending down in front of you
to check the toe,
33
00:02:08,344 --> 00:02:10,469
and so you can see my chest.
34
00:02:10,552 --> 00:02:12,802
That's when I'm really
supposed to say,
35
00:02:12,885 --> 00:02:14,469
- "Check out the new you."
- [chuckles]
36
00:02:14,552 --> 00:02:16,427
But it feels weird
to give Mr. Pickles
37
00:02:16,511 --> 00:02:18,010
the hard sell.
38
00:02:18,094 --> 00:02:21,260
No, no, I like the line.
You can say it again.
39
00:02:21,344 --> 00:02:23,511
But I'll check the toe.
40
00:02:23,594 --> 00:02:25,344
[indistinct chatter]
41
00:02:25,427 --> 00:02:28,094
[Jeff] So...how's your
treatment been coming along?
42
00:02:28,177 --> 00:02:31,344
[Vivian] Uh, can you...
ask me something else?
43
00:02:31,427 --> 00:02:33,302
Mm-hmm--Ooh!
The table keeps wobbling.
44
00:02:33,386 --> 00:02:34,968
Yeah, your elbows.
45
00:02:35,052 --> 00:02:37,718
Oh, right. Sorry.
46
00:02:37,802 --> 00:02:39,760
Excuse me. Are you our--
Waiter. Great.
47
00:02:39,843 --> 00:02:41,760
Can I have
the porterhouse, please?
48
00:02:41,843 --> 00:02:44,302
Rare, like a good vet
can save it?
49
00:02:44,386 --> 00:02:46,052
I don't need a vegetable.
50
00:02:46,135 --> 00:02:48,927
Also, a basket
of truffle cornbread.
51
00:02:49,010 --> 00:02:51,760
Also, a plastic bear of honey.
Thank you.
52
00:02:51,843 --> 00:02:53,302
Oh, you're hungry.
53
00:02:53,386 --> 00:02:55,010
[laughs]
No, I-I...
54
00:02:55,094 --> 00:02:57,302
I mean, I haven't been hungry
in, like, six months.
55
00:02:57,386 --> 00:02:59,260
Of course.
Sorry.
56
00:02:59,344 --> 00:03:02,968
C-can you come back?
I-I don't know what I want yet.
57
00:03:03,052 --> 00:03:05,052
Then why did you call
the waiter over?
58
00:03:05,135 --> 00:03:06,885
[thud]
59
00:03:06,968 --> 00:03:08,010
- [Jeff] Good God.
- [Vivian] Watch your elbows.
60
00:03:08,094 --> 00:03:09,427
- [Jeff] Elbows, I know.
- [Vivian] Yes.
61
00:03:09,511 --> 00:03:11,302
Those pills
are just keeping me alive.
62
00:03:11,386 --> 00:03:12,760
Don't worry. Dinner's on me.
63
00:03:12,843 --> 00:03:13,885
[Jeff] No, no, no,
you don't have to...
64
00:03:13,968 --> 00:03:15,885
- [thud]
- ...do that.
65
00:03:15,968 --> 00:03:18,177
- [groans]
- No, really.
66
00:03:18,260 --> 00:03:20,594
The fine folks at Discover
haven't seen my X-rays.
67
00:03:20,677 --> 00:03:22,177
They don't know
I'm not paying
68
00:03:22,260 --> 00:03:24,386
another bill for the rest
of my life. [chuckles]
69
00:03:24,469 --> 00:03:26,135
Fat fucking table!
70
00:03:26,219 --> 00:03:29,094
[calm jazz music over speakers]
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00:03:29,177 --> 00:03:31,760
♪♪♪
72
00:03:31,843 --> 00:03:33,760
What did you just say?
73
00:03:33,843 --> 00:03:35,968
♪♪♪
74
00:03:36,052 --> 00:03:37,344
I don't know.
75
00:03:37,427 --> 00:03:40,219
♪♪♪
76
00:03:40,302 --> 00:03:43,344
I have a tremendous amount
of pent-up anger,
77
00:03:43,427 --> 00:03:46,511
and I don't know where it's
coming from or how to stop it.
78
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:48,802
And every day
it grows and grows,
79
00:03:48,885 --> 00:03:50,636
and I know I dress
like a Mormon
80
00:03:50,718 --> 00:03:52,511
and I talk like a monk,
81
00:03:52,594 --> 00:03:54,511
but inside,
I'm Mount St. Helens,
82
00:03:54,594 --> 00:03:58,594
and it's 1980, and I am magma
from the neck down.
83
00:03:58,677 --> 00:04:01,302
♪ warm guitar music ♪
84
00:04:01,386 --> 00:04:04,386
♪♪♪
85
00:04:04,469 --> 00:04:06,344
You're so handsome.
86
00:04:06,427 --> 00:04:09,511
♪ You ♪
87
00:04:09,594 --> 00:04:11,427
You're so beautiful.
88
00:04:11,511 --> 00:04:13,511
♪ You ♪
89
00:04:13,594 --> 00:04:16,885
From now on, when I text you
the letter V,
90
00:04:16,968 --> 00:04:20,386
it means I came
thinking about you.
91
00:04:20,469 --> 00:04:24,885
♪♪♪
92
00:04:24,968 --> 00:04:28,552
[easygoing music over speakers]
93
00:04:28,636 --> 00:04:29,968
[whispering] I like...
94
00:04:30,052 --> 00:04:31,718
your knobby knees.
95
00:04:31,802 --> 00:04:33,219
[laughs]
96
00:04:33,302 --> 00:04:37,094
I like the bend
in your shoulder.
97
00:04:37,177 --> 00:04:39,968
I like the space
under your chin.
98
00:04:40,052 --> 00:04:42,677
I like the way that...
99
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:45,052
your feet touch the carpet.
100
00:04:45,135 --> 00:04:47,260
[Jill moans softly]
101
00:04:47,344 --> 00:04:50,260
- It's definitely working now.
- [both laugh]
102
00:04:50,344 --> 00:04:52,927
[normal voice]
That's ASMR--
103
00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:56,094
Autonomous sensory
meridian response.
104
00:04:56,177 --> 00:04:59,511
[whispering]
Whispering triggers it.
105
00:04:59,594 --> 00:05:02,552
It relaxes you.
[hisses]
106
00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:05,802
[laughs]
107
00:05:07,135 --> 00:05:08,677
[phone ringing]
108
00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,594
Oh.
109
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:12,260
Let the machine get it.
110
00:05:12,344 --> 00:05:13,885
More head tingles, please.
111
00:05:13,968 --> 00:05:16,552
[normal voice]
Okay.
112
00:05:16,636 --> 00:05:19,386
[whispering]
History's mysteries...
113
00:05:19,469 --> 00:05:23,594
- [phone continues ringing]
- ...include the Tunguska event
114
00:05:23,677 --> 00:05:25,260
- in Russia...
- [Jill] Mm-hmm.
115
00:05:25,344 --> 00:05:26,843
[Jeff on machine]
You've reached
116
00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:28,511
- Jeff...
- [Jill] Jill...
117
00:05:28,594 --> 00:05:30,552
- [Will] Will...
- [Phil] And Phil.
118
00:05:30,636 --> 00:05:32,843
[all]
We're the Pickles!
119
00:05:32,927 --> 00:05:34,427
[Jeff] Leave a message,
pickle pals.
120
00:05:34,511 --> 00:05:36,594
[laughter, machine beeps]
121
00:05:36,677 --> 00:05:39,552
♪ soft music ♪
122
00:05:39,636 --> 00:05:42,760
♪♪♪
123
00:05:42,843 --> 00:05:43,885
[Jeff] You've reached Jeff...
124
00:05:43,968 --> 00:05:45,219
- [Jill] Jill...
- [Will] Will--
125
00:05:45,302 --> 00:05:47,677
♪♪♪
126
00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:48,552
[door opens]
127
00:05:48,636 --> 00:05:50,511
[sighs]
128
00:05:50,594 --> 00:05:52,885
♪♪♪
129
00:05:52,968 --> 00:05:54,511
[Jeff] I need you
to right-hand Soap Scum.
130
00:05:54,594 --> 00:05:55,968
Why?
131
00:05:56,052 --> 00:05:57,718
But it's--it's not
on the schedule.
132
00:05:57,802 --> 00:05:59,552
I wrote a song about clouds.
133
00:05:59,636 --> 00:06:00,927
[Seb] What kind of clouds?
134
00:06:01,010 --> 00:06:02,594
Clouds made of tears?
135
00:06:02,677 --> 00:06:05,010
What are you trying to say
with this song?
136
00:06:05,094 --> 00:06:07,469
It's just a normal song
about normal clouds.
137
00:06:07,552 --> 00:06:09,052
Huh.
138
00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:10,760
[Jeff] I think Vivian's
my girlfriend.
139
00:06:10,843 --> 00:06:12,718
[breathes deeply]
140
00:06:12,802 --> 00:06:15,344
I like saying that.
141
00:06:15,427 --> 00:06:17,968
It's not appropriate right now,
but down the line,
142
00:06:18,052 --> 00:06:19,552
you should probably
both meet her.
143
00:06:19,636 --> 00:06:20,843
[Deirdre] Wow.
Congratulations.
144
00:06:20,927 --> 00:06:22,386
[Seb]
Yeah, congratulations.
145
00:06:22,469 --> 00:06:23,760
- That would be great, yeah.
- Wonderful news.
146
00:06:23,843 --> 00:06:25,718
It's a big step.
147
00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:30,968
♪♪♪
148
00:06:33,344 --> 00:06:35,010
Oh, he hates me.
149
00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:38,260
Oh, he doesn't do that.
150
00:06:38,344 --> 00:06:40,594
Don't be scared, Hopscotch!
151
00:06:40,677 --> 00:06:42,219
They're just clouds!
152
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:44,177
They're rain clouds.
153
00:06:44,260 --> 00:06:46,802
Rain clouds thunder
and crash.
154
00:06:46,885 --> 00:06:50,094
I like when clouds are shaped
like turtles and bunnies.
155
00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:54,344
But clouds are all made
of the same thing--water.
156
00:06:54,427 --> 00:06:56,052
Come on, big toes!
157
00:06:56,135 --> 00:06:58,927
If I ain't afraid of water,
how can you be?
158
00:06:59,010 --> 00:07:01,968
I'm closer to the clouds
than you.
159
00:07:03,636 --> 00:07:06,052
Not anymore!
160
00:07:06,135 --> 00:07:09,219
[playing upbeat
children's song]
161
00:07:09,302 --> 00:07:12,344
♪ Clouds are just rabbits
lost in the sky ♪
162
00:07:12,427 --> 00:07:15,010
♪ Chasing the rain
as they learn to fly ♪
163
00:07:15,094 --> 00:07:18,135
♪ Two parts H, one part O ♪
164
00:07:18,219 --> 00:07:22,427
♪ Is it a storm
or a gray cotton puff? ♪
165
00:07:22,511 --> 00:07:25,469
♪ Wait, they're made
of the exact same stuff ♪
166
00:07:25,552 --> 00:07:28,260
[both]
♪ Two parts H, one part O ♪
167
00:07:28,344 --> 00:07:31,219
♪ Don't be afraid
of what you don't know ♪
168
00:07:31,302 --> 00:07:34,052
♪ Two parts H,
one part O ♪
169
00:07:34,135 --> 00:07:36,843
♪ Don't be afraid
of what you don't know ♪
170
00:07:36,927 --> 00:07:38,427
[Deirdre, whispering]
Maybe this woman
171
00:07:38,511 --> 00:07:40,636
with the broken phone
and the Hodgkin's lymphoma
172
00:07:40,718 --> 00:07:42,636
is really helping him
turn the corner.
173
00:07:42,718 --> 00:07:46,010
- Maybe this is all he needed.
- Maybe.
174
00:07:46,094 --> 00:07:48,260
[Deidre] Now he wrote
a song about clouds,
175
00:07:48,344 --> 00:07:50,177
and it's really just
about clouds.
176
00:07:50,260 --> 00:07:52,260
Listen.
177
00:07:52,344 --> 00:07:54,843
♪ Don't be afraid
of what you don't know... ♪
178
00:07:54,927 --> 00:07:56,594
We're gonna have
to reshoot this, Dee.
179
00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:57,843
[Deirdre] Why?
180
00:07:57,927 --> 00:07:59,885
He's not wearing
a wedding ring.
181
00:07:59,968 --> 00:08:03,135
- Mr. Pickles is married.
- To whom?
182
00:08:03,219 --> 00:08:04,427
[Seb] It doesn't matter.
183
00:08:04,511 --> 00:08:05,927
Mrs. Pickles.
184
00:08:06,010 --> 00:08:07,843
He's got to put
the ring back on.
185
00:08:07,927 --> 00:08:10,302
[Deirdre] Please don't
ask him to do that.
186
00:08:10,386 --> 00:08:11,885
I have to.
187
00:08:11,968 --> 00:08:15,010
But what if this is
the start of his upswing?
188
00:08:15,094 --> 00:08:17,344
It's not.
189
00:08:17,427 --> 00:08:19,344
Whoo!
190
00:08:19,427 --> 00:08:22,135
Or maybe we hold off...
191
00:08:22,219 --> 00:08:24,094
on Other Jeff,
just for the week,
192
00:08:24,177 --> 00:08:25,885
see where we are.
193
00:08:25,968 --> 00:08:27,594
She's already
in my office, Dee.
194
00:08:27,677 --> 00:08:29,260
I'm sorry.
195
00:08:29,344 --> 00:08:31,344
♪♪♪
196
00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,386
[Seb] I don't have to tell you
what happens
197
00:08:33,469 --> 00:08:35,511
to a generation of children
198
00:08:35,594 --> 00:08:38,885
breast-fed on the electric
nipple of technology.
199
00:08:38,968 --> 00:08:40,802
Lack of empathy,
200
00:08:40,885 --> 00:08:45,552
inability to create
meaningful human connections,
201
00:08:45,636 --> 00:08:47,469
war.
202
00:08:47,552 --> 00:08:51,386
It's like someone dropped
a toaster in the gene pool.
203
00:08:51,469 --> 00:08:53,718
Every day a child
stares at a screen
204
00:08:53,802 --> 00:08:57,511
catapults us closer
to societal collapse.
205
00:08:57,594 --> 00:08:59,594
Unless...
206
00:09:01,718 --> 00:09:04,594
Pickles on Ice.
207
00:09:07,135 --> 00:09:10,094
Nothing would make me happier
than spreading cheer to--
208
00:09:10,177 --> 00:09:13,177
A marriage born out of
the Puppet Time universe,
209
00:09:13,260 --> 00:09:15,760
a story told
in the real world
210
00:09:15,843 --> 00:09:17,718
with your characters
come to life,
211
00:09:17,802 --> 00:09:19,511
starring Mr. Pickles himself,
212
00:09:19,594 --> 00:09:21,010
in person,
213
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:24,386
as played by your ideal
brand ambassador--
214
00:09:24,469 --> 00:09:28,302
Olympic gold medalist,
Miss Tara Lipinski.
215
00:09:28,386 --> 00:09:30,677
If anyone was born
to represent
216
00:09:30,760 --> 00:09:33,344
that which you hold
most dear,
217
00:09:33,427 --> 00:09:35,386
it's this athletic,
wholesome young woman.
218
00:09:35,469 --> 00:09:37,177
Yes.
I'm also a spokesperson
219
00:09:37,260 --> 00:09:38,760
for the Campaign
for Tobacco-Free Kids
220
00:09:38,843 --> 00:09:40,927
and the Childhood Leukemia
Foundation.
221
00:09:41,010 --> 00:09:42,843
[Seb] Oh...
222
00:09:42,927 --> 00:09:45,802
[all murmuring]
223
00:09:48,219 --> 00:09:50,344
So, um...
224
00:09:50,427 --> 00:09:53,718
she, uh, would play me?
225
00:09:53,802 --> 00:09:56,010
We, uh, pre-record
all dialogue,
226
00:09:56,094 --> 00:09:59,219
so it's your voice
and her graceful body
227
00:09:59,302 --> 00:10:02,427
melting hearts,
freezing ice.
228
00:10:03,718 --> 00:10:05,677
Yeah, well...
229
00:10:07,594 --> 00:10:10,760
...I'd like a day
to think about it.
230
00:10:10,843 --> 00:10:12,386
No.
231
00:10:12,469 --> 00:10:14,344
[Seb] Why not?
232
00:10:14,427 --> 00:10:17,386
Because it's my face
on another body.
233
00:10:17,469 --> 00:10:21,302
Well, it's all happening.
234
00:10:21,386 --> 00:10:24,260
I hope you'll get on board.
235
00:10:26,802 --> 00:10:28,135
But I said no.
236
00:10:28,219 --> 00:10:30,135
It was 1987.
237
00:10:30,219 --> 00:10:32,843
You told me
about this school project,
238
00:10:32,927 --> 00:10:35,010
this puppet show
you were working on
239
00:10:35,094 --> 00:10:37,386
for the OSU TV station.
240
00:10:37,469 --> 00:10:39,927
I said,
"Let me build on this."
241
00:10:40,010 --> 00:10:42,094
You said, "Dad,
242
00:10:42,177 --> 00:10:43,927
I don't want a contract.
243
00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:46,469
I want a rule,
one rule...
244
00:10:46,552 --> 00:10:48,260
We give it away."
245
00:10:48,344 --> 00:10:50,636
That was the Jeff rule, Jeff.
246
00:10:50,718 --> 00:10:53,677
If we gave most
of our salaries to charity,
247
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:56,427
I could make
all the decisions.
248
00:10:56,511 --> 00:11:00,010
You didn't even want
an office.
249
00:11:03,135 --> 00:11:04,386
[door opens]
250
00:11:06,302 --> 00:11:08,010
I said I didn't want a desk.
251
00:11:08,094 --> 00:11:09,802
I have saved the whales.
252
00:11:09,885 --> 00:11:11,427
I have saved the children.
253
00:11:11,511 --> 00:11:13,552
Your sister
started a school in Belize
254
00:11:13,636 --> 00:11:15,344
for girls
with Belizean problems.
255
00:11:15,427 --> 00:11:16,802
All that extra cash goes
256
00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,802
exactly where
you want it to go.
257
00:11:18,885 --> 00:11:22,552
We have abided. All I'm asking
is just this one thing.
258
00:11:22,636 --> 00:11:24,843
Am I right, Dee Dee?
259
00:11:24,927 --> 00:11:26,802
Jeff...
260
00:11:26,885 --> 00:11:28,052
What's one more Jeff?
261
00:11:28,135 --> 00:11:29,843
The world needs more Jeffs.
262
00:11:29,927 --> 00:11:31,386
You're not just copying me
263
00:11:31,469 --> 00:11:33,094
onto the body
of a 30-year-old woman.
264
00:11:33,177 --> 00:11:35,386
You're imbuing her
with my full authority.
265
00:11:35,469 --> 00:11:37,968
Her actions
become my actions,
266
00:11:38,052 --> 00:11:39,511
her mistakes, my mistakes,
267
00:11:39,594 --> 00:11:41,718
her mammaries,
my mammaries.
268
00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:43,219
W-when you think about it,
269
00:11:43,302 --> 00:11:45,135
what's the difference
between that
270
00:11:45,219 --> 00:11:47,843
and the already internationally
licensed versions of the show?
271
00:11:47,927 --> 00:11:49,344
In a way, there's already
272
00:11:49,427 --> 00:11:51,677
a copy of you
in over 20 countries.
273
00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:53,677
There's a difference between
Mr. Pickles-san of Japan
274
00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:55,718
or Monsieur Cornichon
du France
275
00:11:55,802 --> 00:11:57,968
or Herr Gherkin
von Deutschland.
276
00:11:58,052 --> 00:11:59,469
I don't speak
those languages.
277
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,260
They wear
different-colored ties.
278
00:12:01,344 --> 00:12:03,885
No child is gonna think
they're me and I'm them.
279
00:12:03,968 --> 00:12:06,260
But Tara Lipinski
would be wearing my skin.
280
00:12:06,344 --> 00:12:08,052
Eh, you're splitting hairs.
281
00:12:08,135 --> 00:12:09,511
No, I'm not.
282
00:12:09,594 --> 00:12:11,010
It's a slippery slope.
283
00:12:11,094 --> 00:12:12,594
What's next, you make
a doll of me
284
00:12:12,677 --> 00:12:14,302
that'll say
whatever you want?
285
00:12:14,386 --> 00:12:16,511
[scoffs] Or a cartoon--
that's even worse.
286
00:12:16,594 --> 00:12:18,344
Soon you won't need me
anymore.
287
00:12:18,427 --> 00:12:20,302
What are you talking about,
Jeff?
288
00:12:20,386 --> 00:12:22,511
Sometimes I think
that's what you want.
289
00:12:22,594 --> 00:12:25,552
Sometimes I know
that's what you want.
290
00:12:25,636 --> 00:12:29,636
A talking doll
is just commerce,
291
00:12:29,718 --> 00:12:32,594
and animating you--
I hope we don't need to,
292
00:12:32,677 --> 00:12:34,885
but that's all gonna depend
on your behavior.
293
00:12:34,968 --> 00:12:37,386
[scoffs]
294
00:12:37,469 --> 00:12:40,010
[yelling] Why do you want
to replace me?
295
00:12:40,094 --> 00:12:42,677
No one is replacing you.
296
00:12:44,219 --> 00:12:46,094
Come on, Jeff.
Come on.
297
00:12:46,177 --> 00:12:49,718
Let's go,
and let's meet...
298
00:12:49,802 --> 00:12:50,968
the writers I hired.
299
00:12:51,052 --> 00:12:52,552
What writers?
300
00:12:52,636 --> 00:12:54,552
Rabbi Michael Epstein
301
00:12:54,636 --> 00:12:56,594
holds a PhD
in child development.
302
00:12:56,677 --> 00:12:59,677
Yeah, I'm a man of God,
but I'm also funny.
303
00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:01,511
[Seb] Grace Kasaki,
304
00:13:01,594 --> 00:13:04,052
a graduate researcher
from OSU.
305
00:13:04,135 --> 00:13:05,594
She just published
an article
306
00:13:05,677 --> 00:13:07,802
in the Journal
of Pediatric Sciences--
307
00:13:07,885 --> 00:13:10,177
The One Thing You Should
Never Feed a Child.
308
00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:12,052
- It's wheat.
- [sighs]
309
00:13:12,135 --> 00:13:13,927
[Seb] And Shelly Pinsker
310
00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:17,386
runs a popular Columbus-area
mommy blog.
311
00:13:17,469 --> 00:13:19,302
I'm new to dialogue,
but I'm exc--
312
00:13:19,386 --> 00:13:21,302
[breathing heavily]
313
00:13:21,386 --> 00:13:22,927
♪ disquieting drum music ♪
314
00:13:23,010 --> 00:13:24,511
Whew.
315
00:13:24,594 --> 00:13:26,802
[exhales in distress]
316
00:13:26,885 --> 00:13:28,469
We've never had writers before.
317
00:13:28,552 --> 00:13:31,344
I'm setting it up
in case one day
318
00:13:31,427 --> 00:13:33,469
you don't want
to do this anymore.
319
00:13:33,552 --> 00:13:35,386
I'm giving you
the peace of mind
320
00:13:35,469 --> 00:13:37,885
to know all this will continue,
regardless.
321
00:13:37,968 --> 00:13:39,802
Regardless of what?
322
00:13:39,885 --> 00:13:42,511
How is Will's drug problem?
Better?
323
00:13:42,594 --> 00:13:44,469
Worse.
324
00:13:44,552 --> 00:13:46,927
I'm sorry to hear that.
325
00:13:47,010 --> 00:13:49,177
Don't you wish you could
spend more time with him?
326
00:13:49,260 --> 00:13:50,552
Well, now you can.
327
00:13:50,636 --> 00:13:52,552
[cell phone chimes]
328
00:13:52,636 --> 00:13:57,260
♪♪♪
329
00:13:57,344 --> 00:13:58,677
[sighs]
330
00:13:58,760 --> 00:13:59,636
Jeff?
331
00:13:59,718 --> 00:14:00,594
What?
332
00:14:00,677 --> 00:14:02,177
We also need you
333
00:14:02,260 --> 00:14:04,010
to reshoot your cloud song.
334
00:14:04,094 --> 00:14:05,802
Why?
335
00:14:05,885 --> 00:14:08,677
Your wedding ring.
336
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:10,094
I'm sorry, kiddo.
337
00:14:10,177 --> 00:14:11,802
I know we're piling
it on today.
338
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,052
[inhales deeply]
339
00:14:13,135 --> 00:14:15,885
[groans]
340
00:14:15,968 --> 00:14:17,636
[Jeff groans]
341
00:14:17,718 --> 00:14:19,427
I was thinking,
342
00:14:19,511 --> 00:14:21,010
with the show
343
00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:23,594
going through all this
healthy upheaval,
344
00:14:23,677 --> 00:14:25,552
what harm could it do
to introduce...
345
00:14:25,636 --> 00:14:28,052
m-m-me?
346
00:14:28,135 --> 00:14:29,760
Roly Polly,
347
00:14:29,843 --> 00:14:31,718
the fearful pill bug.
348
00:14:31,802 --> 00:14:33,511
- I love you, honey.
- [keys clacking]
349
00:14:33,594 --> 00:14:35,219
You're not a performer.
350
00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:41,386
Bye-bye.
351
00:14:43,927 --> 00:14:47,094
I want to voice a puppet.
352
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:49,511
You said
when Jeff leaves the show,
353
00:14:49,594 --> 00:14:51,552
I become the heart
of the operation.
354
00:14:51,636 --> 00:14:53,718
No, no. You're not the heart
of anything.
355
00:14:53,802 --> 00:14:55,511
You become the brains,
not the heart.
356
00:14:55,594 --> 00:14:57,344
Why can't I be the heart?
357
00:14:57,427 --> 00:14:59,552
Oh, yes,
now I see.
358
00:14:59,636 --> 00:15:02,302
We're back in our living room.
He's seven, you're eight.
359
00:15:02,386 --> 00:15:04,843
He's belting Streisand
in perfect pitch,
360
00:15:04,927 --> 00:15:06,511
and you're in the kitchen
361
00:15:06,594 --> 00:15:08,677
accidentally dropping
frying pans.
362
00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:10,469
You're good
at building corpses, Dee Dee.
363
00:15:10,552 --> 00:15:12,927
You're not so great
at bringing things to life.
364
00:15:13,010 --> 00:15:14,427
That is Jeff's territory.
365
00:15:14,511 --> 00:15:16,552
- That is not true!
- Oh, yes.
366
00:15:16,636 --> 00:15:19,302
It was true when you were
a girl and you had Barbie
367
00:15:19,386 --> 00:15:21,552
read Emily Dickinson
to an empty room,
368
00:15:21,636 --> 00:15:23,302
and it was true
when you got older,
369
00:15:23,386 --> 00:15:25,094
what with the in vitro.
370
00:15:25,177 --> 00:15:27,010
Wow.
371
00:15:27,094 --> 00:15:29,885
I'm not inventing a theme here.
I'm exposing one.
372
00:15:29,968 --> 00:15:32,760
You're good at the quiet arts,
like conveying disdain.
373
00:15:34,427 --> 00:15:35,718
See?
374
00:15:35,802 --> 00:15:38,927
Please, can I puppet
the pill bug?
375
00:15:39,010 --> 00:15:40,677
I need it.
376
00:15:42,636 --> 00:15:45,636
I need it.
I need something for myself.
377
00:15:45,718 --> 00:15:47,802
My marriage is falling apart.
378
00:15:47,885 --> 00:15:50,718
It just feels that way
because you dislike each other.
379
00:15:50,802 --> 00:15:53,052
I think Scott might be gay.
380
00:15:53,135 --> 00:15:54,636
Oh, no, he's not.
Trust me.
381
00:15:54,718 --> 00:15:57,594
I'm a Navy man.
You're fine, Dee Dee.
382
00:15:57,677 --> 00:16:00,135
Jeff's breaking down,
but you're doing great.
383
00:16:00,219 --> 00:16:01,677
Okay?
384
00:16:04,302 --> 00:16:05,885
[quietly] Okay.
385
00:16:05,968 --> 00:16:10,094
My name is Roly Polly.
386
00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:15,344
[sighs]
387
00:16:18,802 --> 00:16:22,594
[cell phone beeping]
388
00:16:22,677 --> 00:16:24,968
♪ light dramatic music ♪
389
00:16:25,052 --> 00:16:27,386
[cell phone chimes]
390
00:16:27,469 --> 00:16:32,552
♪♪♪
391
00:16:33,219 --> 00:16:34,968
[breathes deeply]
392
00:16:35,052 --> 00:16:39,636
♪♪♪
393
00:16:49,469 --> 00:16:51,302
[cell phone buzzes]
394
00:16:51,386 --> 00:16:53,427
♪♪♪
395
00:16:53,511 --> 00:16:56,843
[cell phone buzzes]
396
00:16:56,927 --> 00:16:59,177
♪♪♪
397
00:16:59,260 --> 00:17:00,511
Whoo.
398
00:17:00,594 --> 00:17:02,718
Mickey Foyerstein.
399
00:17:02,802 --> 00:17:04,427
Who?
400
00:17:04,511 --> 00:17:07,427
Oh, t-this kid who got
kidnapped by an ice cream man.
401
00:17:07,511 --> 00:17:10,677
At first, I heard he got to eat
any ice cream bar for free,
402
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:12,427
so I was jealous.
403
00:17:12,511 --> 00:17:14,552
Then I heard
he got molested,
404
00:17:14,636 --> 00:17:15,718
and I was like, "Ah, sucks."
405
00:17:15,802 --> 00:17:17,260
Did you know him?
406
00:17:17,344 --> 00:17:19,386
Nah, but I've been trying
to think of his name
407
00:17:19,469 --> 00:17:20,677
ever since I learned that
that old dude's
408
00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:23,386
been creeping on us
in his creep coupe.
409
00:17:25,386 --> 00:17:27,135
You, kid.
410
00:17:27,219 --> 00:17:28,802
Get in the car.
411
00:17:28,885 --> 00:17:30,511
Okay.
412
00:17:30,594 --> 00:17:33,177
[Gigs] Don't do it, man!
Think of Mickey.
413
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:36,843
Or else he would have lost
his innocence for nothing!
414
00:17:36,927 --> 00:17:40,802
- Okay, look me in the eye.
- Hello! Help!
415
00:17:40,885 --> 00:17:42,594
Where's the weed?
416
00:17:42,677 --> 00:17:45,885
- I, uh, don't have any.
- Somebody! Help!
417
00:17:45,968 --> 00:17:48,636
You don't have any?
418
00:17:48,718 --> 00:17:51,469
What the hell
are we gonna smoke?
419
00:17:51,552 --> 00:17:53,469
He's gonna touch
your genitals!
420
00:17:53,552 --> 00:17:55,636
Listen!
421
00:17:55,718 --> 00:17:58,469
[whispering] I'm so glad
you're here with me tonight.
422
00:17:58,552 --> 00:18:01,968
I really missed you.
423
00:18:02,052 --> 00:18:05,260
I saw my mom and Peter
watching this earlier.
424
00:18:05,344 --> 00:18:08,010
Here.
425
00:18:08,094 --> 00:18:09,760
[woman] There was
some stuff going on.
426
00:18:09,843 --> 00:18:12,177
I hate this.
427
00:18:12,260 --> 00:18:14,636
[whispering] Do you want me
to turn it off?
428
00:18:14,718 --> 00:18:16,927
[exhales deeply]
No.
429
00:18:17,010 --> 00:18:20,219
[woman] I just
want to cook you some pasta,
430
00:18:20,302 --> 00:18:24,636
then twirl it around
on the plate.
431
00:18:24,718 --> 00:18:28,427
Boy, this is some
dank ganj, huh?
432
00:18:28,511 --> 00:18:31,177
What?
433
00:18:31,260 --> 00:18:32,968
You like it?
434
00:18:33,052 --> 00:18:36,135
- [laughing] Yeah.
- Good.
435
00:18:36,219 --> 00:18:38,219
'Cause that's the last time
436
00:18:38,302 --> 00:18:40,927
you're ever
gonna smoke weed, kid.
437
00:18:41,010 --> 00:18:42,802
You are breaking
your father's heart
438
00:18:42,885 --> 00:18:45,260
with this shit,
you understand me?
439
00:18:45,344 --> 00:18:47,260
You're breaking his heart.
440
00:18:47,344 --> 00:18:50,718
[woman hissing,
whispers indistinctly]
441
00:18:50,802 --> 00:18:52,260
What about
behind the school?
442
00:18:52,344 --> 00:18:53,511
Nah, man.
443
00:18:53,594 --> 00:18:54,885
That's a total no-go.
444
00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,927
Special Ed is practicing
archery in the woods.
445
00:18:58,010 --> 00:18:59,260
♪ light string music ♪
446
00:18:59,344 --> 00:19:00,386
[groans]
447
00:19:00,469 --> 00:19:02,010
♪♪♪
448
00:19:02,094 --> 00:19:03,427
Want to come get blazed?
449
00:19:03,511 --> 00:19:05,469
We don't know where yet.
450
00:19:05,552 --> 00:19:07,469
Archery day, huh?
451
00:19:07,552 --> 00:19:09,427
Yeah, all week.
452
00:19:09,511 --> 00:19:10,885
The woods are not safe.
453
00:19:10,968 --> 00:19:12,885
No, man,
I'm actually, you know,
454
00:19:12,968 --> 00:19:15,177
trying to eat healthier,
smoke less.
455
00:19:15,260 --> 00:19:17,843
Oh.
Same.
456
00:19:17,927 --> 00:19:19,843
Whatever, lesbians.
457
00:19:19,927 --> 00:19:22,052
There you go.
458
00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:27,802
Ah, dope kicks.
459
00:19:27,885 --> 00:19:31,344
I like the way
I feel in them.
460
00:19:31,427 --> 00:19:33,302
- They're dope kicks.
- [laughs]
461
00:19:33,386 --> 00:19:36,302
♪ elegant orchestral music ♪
462
00:19:36,386 --> 00:19:41,260
♪♪♪
463
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:39,094
[Jeff] When I want
to let it out...
464
00:20:39,177 --> 00:20:41,427
[sighs]
...sometimes I go swimming,
465
00:20:41,511 --> 00:20:44,552
see how long
I can hold my breath.
466
00:20:44,636 --> 00:20:46,885
One time, I blacked out.
467
00:20:46,968 --> 00:20:48,968
Good thing there was
a lifeguard on duty.
468
00:20:49,052 --> 00:20:50,552
[Vivian and Jeff laugh]
469
00:20:50,636 --> 00:20:52,010
[Jeff]
Or sometimes, I'll, uh,
470
00:20:52,094 --> 00:20:54,260
blow really hard
into a harmonica.
471
00:20:54,344 --> 00:20:56,344
- That's really good.
- [Vivian giggles]
472
00:20:56,427 --> 00:20:58,636
When I was Will's age,
I'd go skating.
473
00:20:58,718 --> 00:21:00,636
Skate it off.
[breathes deeply]
474
00:21:00,718 --> 00:21:03,302
Well, you're pretty good
at it.
475
00:21:03,386 --> 00:21:05,094
Yeah.
476
00:21:05,177 --> 00:21:08,427
I'm no Olympian... yet.
477
00:21:08,511 --> 00:21:12,052
Oh.
Well, I don't think...
478
00:21:12,135 --> 00:21:15,094
you want to tour meth country
in an ice show.
479
00:21:15,177 --> 00:21:18,802
No, but I don't like
that he can make another me.
480
00:21:18,885 --> 00:21:20,677
I like to feel necessary.
481
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,802
[light music over speakers]
482
00:21:22,885 --> 00:21:24,802
There's a really great quote
483
00:21:24,885 --> 00:21:26,843
from the Y-Yajurveda.
484
00:21:26,927 --> 00:21:29,427
It's a Hindu text.
It'll solve all your problems.
485
00:21:29,511 --> 00:21:31,427
It says...
486
00:21:31,511 --> 00:21:33,552
"Punch your fucking father
in the face."
487
00:21:33,636 --> 00:21:35,260
[stifled laugh]
488
00:21:35,344 --> 00:21:37,219
Do you know how many people
I've punched in the face
489
00:21:37,302 --> 00:21:39,135
ever since I stopped caring
about going to jail?
490
00:21:39,219 --> 00:21:40,885
Three, including
my oncologist.
491
00:21:40,968 --> 00:21:42,552
- Mm-hmm.
- Wow.
492
00:21:42,636 --> 00:21:44,010
[woman] Six dollars
for a slice of pizza?
493
00:21:44,094 --> 00:21:45,968
That's, like, a $30 meal.
494
00:21:46,052 --> 00:21:48,260
Who comes in here
that can afford that?
495
00:21:48,344 --> 00:21:49,968
My boss says global warming
496
00:21:50,052 --> 00:21:52,594
iced out the tomato crops
this year, so...
497
00:21:52,677 --> 00:21:54,010
- Can you hang on a sec?
- [boy] Can you just please
498
00:21:54,094 --> 00:21:57,344
stop yelling at me?
499
00:21:57,427 --> 00:21:59,677
Excuse me.
500
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:01,511
Whatever anybody wants
501
00:22:01,594 --> 00:22:04,594
for the rest of the day
is free.
502
00:22:04,677 --> 00:22:07,052
Like, start a tab?
503
00:22:07,135 --> 00:22:09,718
I don't--don't think
I'm allowed to do that.
504
00:22:09,802 --> 00:22:10,927
Sure you can.
505
00:22:11,010 --> 00:22:12,552
Give this to yourself.
506
00:22:12,636 --> 00:22:14,344
It feels wonderful.
507
00:22:14,427 --> 00:22:16,010
[chuckles]
508
00:22:16,094 --> 00:22:17,885
[woman]
Thank you, Mr. Pickles.
509
00:22:17,968 --> 00:22:19,677
- [boy] Thanks, dude.
- [man] Thanks, Mr. Pickles.
510
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:20,802
[chuckles]
511
00:22:20,885 --> 00:22:22,636
Saving the world.
512
00:22:22,718 --> 00:22:24,135
[laughs] Nah...
513
00:22:24,219 --> 00:22:25,552
feeding it.
514
00:22:25,677 --> 00:22:27,594
[both laugh]
515
00:22:27,677 --> 00:22:30,010
I asked my parents to come up
for a week after my next round.
516
00:22:30,094 --> 00:22:32,010
They said it was too cold.
517
00:22:32,094 --> 00:22:34,511
- [scoffs]
- They live in Jersey.
518
00:22:34,594 --> 00:22:36,094
Well...
519
00:22:36,177 --> 00:22:38,469
this is a difficult time
for them, too.
520
00:22:38,552 --> 00:22:40,760
They're afraid to know
a world without you.
521
00:22:40,843 --> 00:22:42,636
No, they're upset
that I went
522
00:22:42,718 --> 00:22:44,469
with the recommendations
of my doctors
523
00:22:44,552 --> 00:22:46,927
and not something that my dad
found on WebMD.
524
00:22:47,010 --> 00:22:48,594
Sorry, your card's
been declined.
525
00:22:48,677 --> 00:22:50,469
I-it keeps giving me
the code you get
526
00:22:50,552 --> 00:22:53,802
when they place a hold on it
due to suspicious activity.
527
00:22:53,885 --> 00:22:55,511
[sighs]
528
00:22:55,594 --> 00:22:56,802
Will.
529
00:22:56,885 --> 00:22:59,177
[fast-paced music
over speakers]
530
00:22:59,260 --> 00:23:00,511
Do you take Discover?
531
00:23:00,594 --> 00:23:01,718
♪♪♪
532
00:23:01,802 --> 00:23:04,718
[insects chirping]
533
00:23:08,010 --> 00:23:09,968
May I enter the residence?
534
00:23:10,052 --> 00:23:12,302
Yeah, just wipe your feet.
535
00:23:15,636 --> 00:23:18,469
[phone ringing]
536
00:23:24,843 --> 00:23:27,177
[Jill on machine] Hi.
You've reached Jill and Will.
537
00:23:27,260 --> 00:23:29,386
[Peter]
And sometimes Peter.
538
00:23:29,469 --> 00:23:31,386
[Jill] Please leave a message
after the tone.
539
00:23:31,469 --> 00:23:32,511
[machine beeps]
540
00:23:32,594 --> 00:23:36,010
[door closes]
541
00:23:36,094 --> 00:23:37,760
Have you been using
my debit card?
542
00:23:37,843 --> 00:23:39,427
I don't think so.
543
00:23:39,511 --> 00:23:41,760
You haven't used it
to buy anything online
544
00:23:41,843 --> 00:23:42,760
or anything like that?
545
00:23:42,843 --> 00:23:44,760
No.
546
00:23:44,843 --> 00:23:46,885
I promise.
547
00:23:52,802 --> 00:23:55,718
A plumber was applying
for a job in a building.
548
00:23:55,802 --> 00:23:59,302
The building manager said,
"Are you a good plumber?"
549
00:23:59,386 --> 00:24:03,260
And the plumber said,
"Yes, I'm the best plumber."
550
00:24:03,344 --> 00:24:07,260
The building manager asked...
551
00:24:07,344 --> 00:24:09,135
"Have you ever made
a mistake?"
552
00:24:09,219 --> 00:24:11,010
And the plumber said, "Never."
553
00:24:11,094 --> 00:24:13,260
"Then how can I hire you?"...
554
00:24:14,927 --> 00:24:17,386
...the manager replied.
555
00:24:17,469 --> 00:24:21,552
"If you make a mistake,
you won't know how to fix it."
556
00:24:21,636 --> 00:24:23,094
[sighs]
557
00:24:23,177 --> 00:24:24,885
That doesn't make
any sense.
558
00:24:24,968 --> 00:24:27,302
Why would the plumber need
to know how to fix a mistake
559
00:24:27,386 --> 00:24:29,469
if his whole thing
is that he never makes them?
560
00:24:29,552 --> 00:24:32,594
- Everybody makes mistakes.
- Oh, so the plumber was lying?
561
00:24:32,677 --> 00:24:34,469
That's not what I'm saying.
562
00:24:34,552 --> 00:24:37,552
Well, if he isn't lying,
then it seems pretty unfair
563
00:24:37,636 --> 00:24:39,885
that he's getting passed up
for a worse plumber
564
00:24:39,968 --> 00:24:42,302
just because the manager
has a fetish for fuckups.
565
00:24:42,386 --> 00:24:45,219
- Will!
- I didn't use your debit card.
566
00:24:45,302 --> 00:24:46,636
Our words have power.
567
00:24:46,718 --> 00:24:49,135
- If you're not careful--
- Shut up!
568
00:24:49,219 --> 00:24:51,885
Stop talking!
Stop with the lessons!
569
00:24:51,968 --> 00:24:54,386
We get it!
You always know what to say!
570
00:24:55,718 --> 00:24:57,094
I'm sorry.
571
00:24:57,177 --> 00:24:58,885
Sometimes I don't want you
to talk.
572
00:24:58,968 --> 00:25:01,511
I want you to listen.
573
00:25:01,594 --> 00:25:03,718
I'm your dad.
574
00:25:03,802 --> 00:25:06,135
I'm always listening.
575
00:25:06,219 --> 00:25:07,594
Doesn't matter.
576
00:25:07,677 --> 00:25:09,594
Poppy already sat me down
577
00:25:09,677 --> 00:25:11,094
and told me everything you're
probably gonna say any--
578
00:25:11,177 --> 00:25:13,636
He what?
When?
579
00:25:13,718 --> 00:25:16,344
Yesterday, and it took him
about five words
580
00:25:16,427 --> 00:25:18,552
to say what takes you 100.
581
00:25:18,636 --> 00:25:20,718
He's not me.
582
00:25:20,802 --> 00:25:22,594
Peter's not me.
583
00:25:24,010 --> 00:25:26,260
Tara Lipinski's not me.
584
00:25:27,135 --> 00:25:28,885
Whatever.
585
00:25:28,968 --> 00:25:30,843
Please don't send Poppy
to kidnap me.
586
00:25:30,927 --> 00:25:33,760
He's old,
and he scares my friends.
587
00:25:33,843 --> 00:25:35,386
I need to talk to him.
588
00:25:35,469 --> 00:25:38,219
[door opens, closes]
589
00:25:38,302 --> 00:25:41,219
♪ rumbling drum music ♪
590
00:25:41,302 --> 00:25:44,552
♪♪♪
591
00:25:44,636 --> 00:25:45,802
God damn it.
592
00:25:45,885 --> 00:25:47,677
Hey, did you accidentally
593
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:50,052
text me a bunch
of Js this morning?
594
00:25:50,135 --> 00:25:52,302
You know, I'm always
on your side,
595
00:25:52,386 --> 00:25:55,344
no matter what,
and I just--
596
00:25:55,427 --> 00:25:58,219
I can't wait to meet Vivian.
She seems really cool.
597
00:25:58,302 --> 00:26:00,511
And, you know, they're always
curing new stuff.
598
00:26:00,594 --> 00:26:02,010
[Deirdre] Do you think
I have a heart?
599
00:26:02,094 --> 00:26:04,968
[grunting]
600
00:26:05,052 --> 00:26:07,010
Tear that little shit apart,
Jeffrey!
601
00:26:07,094 --> 00:26:09,927
Tear that little shit apart,
Jeffrey!
602
00:26:10,010 --> 00:26:12,968
♪ tense music ♪
603
00:26:13,052 --> 00:26:15,552
♪♪♪
604
00:26:15,636 --> 00:26:18,469
[bell dings, echoes]
605
00:26:22,968 --> 00:26:25,302
Hi, I'm Jeff.
606
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:31,636
♪ somber music ♪
607
00:26:31,718 --> 00:26:36,677
♪♪♪
608
00:26:41,552 --> 00:26:44,469
[cell phone ringing]
609
00:26:44,552 --> 00:26:49,219
♪♪♪
610
00:26:49,302 --> 00:26:50,760
[woman]
Hello, this is Citibank,
611
00:26:50,843 --> 00:26:52,802
early fraud
detection department.
612
00:26:52,885 --> 00:26:54,760
A suspicious transaction
in the amount
613
00:26:54,843 --> 00:26:58,344
of $678.43
614
00:26:58,427 --> 00:27:00,010
was charged
to Bartleby's Shoes
615
00:27:00,094 --> 00:27:02,552
on Sunday, October 14th.
616
00:27:02,636 --> 00:27:07,302
Please press one to confirm
you made this transaction.
617
00:27:07,386 --> 00:27:10,010
[cell phone beeps]
618
00:27:10,094 --> 00:27:11,594
On your way
to archery, retard?
619
00:27:11,677 --> 00:27:13,469
I know a place
where we can light up.
620
00:27:13,552 --> 00:27:16,219
- I thought you quit.
- [Will] Whatever.
621
00:27:16,302 --> 00:27:18,302
- Whose house is this?
- Yeah.
622
00:27:18,386 --> 00:27:21,511
My new invisible neighbor.
623
00:27:21,594 --> 00:27:24,469
- [Cassidy] It's empty?
- [Will] Yeah.
624
00:27:24,552 --> 00:27:27,677
No one moved in.
It's just sitting here.
625
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:30,302
[Jeff and puppets]
♪ Two parts H, one part O ♪
626
00:27:30,386 --> 00:27:33,302
♪ Don't be afraid
of what you don't know ♪
627
00:27:33,386 --> 00:27:36,302
[Jeff] ♪ They're up there,
it's just vapor and air ♪
628
00:27:36,386 --> 00:27:38,802
♪ Even the thunder
is made from air ♪
629
00:27:38,885 --> 00:27:40,636
[Hopscotch]
♪ But could a cloud ♪
630
00:27:40,718 --> 00:27:44,594
♪ Get too heavy and fall? ♪
631
00:27:44,677 --> 00:27:47,052
[Jeff] ♪ No, there's nothing
to be scared of ♪
632
00:27:47,135 --> 00:27:49,677
♪ At all ♪
633
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:51,594
♪ There's nothing... ♪
634
00:27:51,677 --> 00:27:53,135
Et voilà.
635
00:27:53,219 --> 00:27:54,760
[Jeff] ♪ ...to be scared of ♪
636
00:27:54,843 --> 00:27:59,094
♪ At all ♪
637
00:27:59,177 --> 00:28:02,344
[hissing]
638
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:13,677
♪ Kumisolo's "Ping Pong
Machine" playing ♪
639
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:18,594
♪♪♪
640
00:28:23,885 --> 00:28:27,469
♪ Endurance et fureur
ping pong machine ♪
641
00:28:27,552 --> 00:28:29,344
♪ Discipline,
efforts et ardeur ♪
642
00:28:29,427 --> 00:28:31,760
♪ Ping pong pang
pong machine ♪
643
00:28:31,843 --> 00:28:35,219
♪ Endurance et fureur
ping pong machine, machine ♪
644
00:28:35,302 --> 00:28:37,094
♪ Discipline efforts
et ardeur ♪
645
00:28:37,177 --> 00:28:38,843
♪ Ping pong pang
pong machine ♪
646
00:28:38,927 --> 00:28:44,094
♪♪♪
647
00:28:54,427 --> 00:28:56,469
♪ Endurance et fureur
ping pong machine ♪
648
00:28:56,519 --> 00:29:01,069
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