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♪ All of dem, I want it all, gimme all of dat ♪
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♪ All of dem, I want it all, gimme all of dat ♪
3
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♪ All of dem, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme all of dem ♪
4
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♪ 1, 2, makin' that boom, gimme headroom ♪
5
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♪ Stretched out all in the backseat ♪
6
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♪ I need the leg room ♪
7
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♪ Gimme, gimme suga, suga, honey, what that bread do? ♪
8
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♪ Sticky, sticky money trees, stuck to me, don't never move ♪
9
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♪ Call me Señora Cash Dolla, holla ♪
10
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♪ If the coin talking, ring my Motorola ♪
11
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♪ Or I be on DND chillin' in my Corolla ♪
12
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♪ Posted up like a piece of art at the MOMA, MOMA ♪
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♪ All of dem, I want it all, gimme all of dat ♪
14
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♪ All of dem, gimme, gimme, gimme all of dem ♪
15
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♪ All of dem, I want it all, gimme all of dat ♪
16
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♪ All of dem, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme all of dem ♪
17
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♪ All of dem, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme all of dem ♪
18
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♪ Come here, baby, quiet down, and listen ♪ Yo, yo, yo, whassup?
19
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Unh-unh.
20
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♪ I'm tryna get it all tonight, it's a mission ♪
21
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♪ Gimme, gimme all the spice ♪
22
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Thank you so much for doing this.
23
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Can she even see this fake boyfriending I'm doing?
24
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Oh, yeah. I guarantee you,
25
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she is watching from that window right now.
26
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[ Seatbelt clicks ]
27
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♪ All of dem, I want it all, gimme all of dat ♪
28
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Now she's gonna go binge "7th Heaven,"
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which is her, like, really dark go-to.
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♪ Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme all of dem ♪
31
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♪ All of dem ♪
32
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So, with pictures,
33
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are you, like, good with taking them?
34
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'Cause, like -- just 'cause she stalks my Insta, so...
35
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♪ Gimme dem, gimme dat, gimme dat ♪
36
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♪ Gimme a little pat on my bum bum, little-bitty bum bum ♪
37
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[ Cellphone camera clicks ] ♪ Gimme a little, little, little, little lover pat ♪
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Oh, she's nervous for the fake date!
39
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♪ Ta-ta-ta ♪
40
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♪ Rrrr, poppa-pop, poppa-pop-pop-pop-pop ♪
41
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
42
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Wherever you want to drop me off is totally cool.
43
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I'm good.
44
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Oh.
45
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Okay, great. Awesome.
46
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Um, well, if you want to go anywhere,
47
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I'll happily pay for it.
48
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Like Yogurtland or Din Tai Fung or whatever.
49
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Mm.
50
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
51
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Oh, my God. Riley won't stop texting me.
52
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Ask Cunt if she's looking for a ride.
53
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From your phone?
54
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Yes.
55
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Chester: See? She trusts him.
56
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♪♪
57
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Should I -- Should I call her a cunt?
58
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Yes.
59
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[ Cellphone clicks, chimes ]
60
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[ Woman singing in Spanish ]
61
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
62
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Okay.
63
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Cool. So we'll go get Riley.
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[ Tires squeal ]
65
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Can I ask you something? Hmm?
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You know when we kissed?
67
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Yeah, that was fucking hilarious.
68
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Yeah, it was so funny.
69
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So good.
70
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Um, so, like, when you're dating someone --
71
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like, for real, like, not like us... Mm-hmm?
72
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...you can't, like, ask, like,
73
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"How was it?" or, like, "Was I -- Was I good?"
74
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Wait, you want to know if your kissing was good?
75
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Yeah. Is that weird? You don't -- You don't have to.
76
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Oh, no, I'm definitely going to.
77
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Okay, so, first, I would say,
78
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lips like pillows, that's great.
79
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Pillows?
80
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Okay. Okay, great. Wow.
81
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Tongue was definitely too hard and muscle-y,
82
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like a little jabby.
83
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Okay, I'll -- I'll watch out for that.
84
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Yeah.
85
00:03:02,982 --> 00:03:04,717
Once this guy, like, ran his tongue over my teeth,
86
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and at first, I was like,
87
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"What the fuck is this weird Sonicare action?"
88
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And then I was kind of into it.
89
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I don't know.
90
00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:14,694
I wouldn't -- I wouldn't recommend that for you, though.
91
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I would just, like, go in a-a little firm,
92
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but not too pushy-push.
93
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Like, that, like -- a little less active.
94
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Less active? Yes.
95
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Okay. Okay, that's great advice.
96
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Thanks.
97
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Don't ask me to practice with you.
98
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No. No, no, no, of course not. Oh, my God.
99
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So you don't want to.
100
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N-No, I mean -- I mean, I-I would love to.
101
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I'm messing with you.
102
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Only 'cause I love you.
103
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
104
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♪♪
105
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Oh, my God. This is, like -- No!
106
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She looks like a glow stick.
107
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I don't want to be that gay,
108
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but, like, this is a cry for help.
109
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X-arms emoji.
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♪♪
111
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[ Cellphone chimes ]
112
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♪♪
113
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Wherever you're going, I need you back by 6:30.
114
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Why?
115
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Your cousin is moving to Anaheim
116
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and is coming for dinner, and your mother wants you home.
117
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Wait, what cousin?
118
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Christina. She just got here.
119
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Okay, I've literally never heard of her,
120
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and she should have asked me.
121
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No, nobody needs to ask you.
122
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This is what you do for family. You show up.
123
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So you can stop being so selfish now.
124
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Listen, cabrona, in this, I'm very with your mother,
125
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and I'm very sick of Little Miss Do What I Want.
126
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She's Skyping exactly at 6:30 to see you and your cousin,
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so be home, or she won't be letting you go out at all.
128
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How about I come home when I want,
129
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and she try to not let me out all the way from Guadalajara?
130
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Unh-unh! Not today, Satanás.
131
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[ Door opens ] Not today.
132
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Be home at 6:30.
133
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♪ I took all my sick days ♪
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♪ How'd I get in this place? ♪
135
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♪ Probably restin' bitch face, lazy ♪
136
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I just had to endure my dad screaming at his girlfriend,
137
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who started sobbing uncontrollably,
138
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and somehow I had to be the one to make her feel better...
139
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which my mom saw and then freaked out about, so...
140
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Hello, I hate everyone. How are you guys?
141
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Are you guys on another one of your sad fake dates?
142
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Creepy, right? More just sad than anything.
143
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Like, neither of you can date real people,
144
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so you just fake-date each other.
145
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Oh! She's mad on the home front and coming for us.
146
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I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
147
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I would not even know how to go on a real non-hookup date.
148
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Like, what was your last good date before this?
149
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No way. Nathan: What?
150
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That's not true. What?
151
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Bo was your first real date?
152
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Define "date."
153
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Okay, fine, yes. [ Volume increases ]
154
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And whatever, 'cause we just weren't right for each other.
155
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[ Volume increases, volume lowers ]
156
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How do you know that? Because there was zero chemistry.
157
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But, like, I don't know, like, on "Married at First Sight,"
158
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the wives are always like, "Ew, I hate you. Don't touch me."
159
00:06:05,498 --> 00:06:08,534
But that's just 'cause they're arranged marriages. Yeah, Jamie and Doug.
160
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Yes, exactly.
161
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Like, at first, she thought he was so ugly
162
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and didn't even want to take wedding photos with him.
163
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He was legit ugly. He was so sweet.
164
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No, I know.
165
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He was so genuinely patient and understanding.
166
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So, at the end of six weeks, she's like,
167
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"I actually love you a lot, Doug.
168
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Let's stay married."
169
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I don't know, maybe it's, like, worth another try.
170
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[ Cellphones ding ]
171
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No.
172
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She's my friend, and we're literally right there.
173
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That is not why you're doing it.
174
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Doing what?
175
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Oh, my God!
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Two people have never been so annoying in their entire lives!
177
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He's trying to go pick up
178
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Greta so we'll be forced to spend time with each other,
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'cause he's Mr. Matchmaker,
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except he can't matchmake himself.
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Oh, okay. Now I'm definitely doing it.
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♪♪
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Hi!
184
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Hey.
185
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♪ That don't impress you ♪
186
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♪ I want you to impress me ♪
187
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♪ It don't matter what I want ♪
188
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Hi. Hi.
189
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Hey. Need help?
190
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Mama says buckle up.
191
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♪ Oh ♪
192
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♪ Oh, you run away ♪
193
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♪ Oh, you run away ♪
194
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♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
195
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Thank you for coming. Moms are literally so annoying.
196
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Not when they're dead.
197
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I don't ever know what to say when you do that.
198
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I know. I'm such a twat.
199
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Gimme Red Vines, and good call, by the way,
200
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'cause fuck that plastic Twizzler shit!
201
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,802
[ Chuckles ]
202
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,338
I feel like we're having identical days.
203
00:07:52,338 --> 00:07:54,507
Yeah? Yeah.
204
00:07:54,507 --> 00:07:55,875
Are you okay?
205
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Yeah, I'm good.
206
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No. No, thanks.
207
00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:03,916
I just want to not be home, so wherever you're going.
208
00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:07,119
We are taking Riley to Delilah's,
209
00:08:07,119 --> 00:08:08,788
and then the world is our Din Thai Fung oyster,
210
00:08:08,788 --> 00:08:12,158
Nathan's treat. Yeah.
211
00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,293
Um, so are you gonna text him?
212
00:08:14,293 --> 00:08:18,030
Wait, what are we talking about? Nothing. Stop. Stop.
213
00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:20,867
I'm driving everyone. I get six miles to the gallon.
214
00:08:20,867 --> 00:08:24,637
I do not need a gangbang coming for my love life.
215
00:08:24,637 --> 00:08:26,873
We're trying to get you a love life.
216
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I am Team Second Chance.
217
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Chester: Greta, where do you fall on second chances?
218
00:08:33,112 --> 00:08:37,550
Uh, yeah. Totally. Second chance it.
219
00:08:37,550 --> 00:08:39,685
Hmm.
220
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:49,028
♪ Looks like I've got a story to tell ♪
221
00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:50,997
Do you have any money? Yeah.
222
00:08:50,997 --> 00:08:56,335
♪ I tried to warn you, but you just repelled ♪
223
00:08:56,335 --> 00:08:58,971
Gas. Thank...you.
224
00:08:58,971 --> 00:09:02,241
♪ Me adiestré como antes, fui yo sola, me saqué ♪
225
00:09:02,241 --> 00:09:03,943
Ooh.
226
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:06,412
♪ No te diré mi historia, tú solito vas a ver ♪
227
00:09:06,412 --> 00:09:08,581
Sorry. Oh.
228
00:09:08,581 --> 00:09:09,815
It's okay.
229
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♪ Now I'm on my way ♪
230
00:09:12,184 --> 00:09:13,653
Um...
231
00:09:13,653 --> 00:09:14,854
♪ The sky's no longer grey ♪
232
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I'll see you around?
233
00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:17,256
Yeah, definitely.
234
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♪ Not today, no, I'm on my way ♪
235
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Bye, guys.
236
00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:24,030
Have fun. Bye, love.
237
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♪ Mi alma frutará ♪
238
00:09:26,799 --> 00:09:30,836
♪ No, jamás te olvidarás de mí ♪
239
00:09:32,171 --> 00:09:34,340
[ Indistinct conversation in distance ]
240
00:09:40,179 --> 00:09:42,014
Hi. Hi. Come in, come in.
241
00:09:42,014 --> 00:09:44,016
It's so good to see you.
242
00:09:44,016 --> 00:09:46,052
Okay, so this is kinda weird, but I kinda have to ask
243
00:09:46,052 --> 00:09:47,587
'cause it's kinda in the middle of happening. Okay.
244
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:48,721
Read this.
245
00:09:48,721 --> 00:09:51,657
[ Breathes deeply ]
246
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:54,927
Uh, what do you think it means?
247
00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:56,529
Um, I guess he's asking
248
00:09:56,529 --> 00:10:00,099
if you want to hang out sometime today?
249
00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:04,470
Yeah. Okay, that's what I thought.
250
00:10:04,470 --> 00:10:06,906
But -- But, like, what does it mean?
251
00:10:06,906 --> 00:10:08,474
'Cause -- 'Cause Naomi likes him.
252
00:10:08,474 --> 00:10:10,242
But just 'cause she likes him doesn't mean
253
00:10:10,242 --> 00:10:12,211
he doesn't like you. Wait, do you think he does?
254
00:10:12,211 --> 00:10:13,813
I mean, if he's asking to hang out today, uh, yeah.
255
00:10:13,813 --> 00:10:16,816
Probably.
256
00:10:16,816 --> 00:10:19,719
Oh, shit. Oh, fuck. Oh, God.
257
00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:21,387
So, is he coming over? No. You're here.
258
00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:23,089
I don't want to be that girl who's like, "Come over,"
259
00:10:23,089 --> 00:10:25,391
and then blows you off for a guy.
260
00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:27,026
Okay.
261
00:10:27,026 --> 00:10:29,996
But, I mean, I'm fine if he comes over.
262
00:10:29,996 --> 00:10:33,566
Really? Yeah.
263
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:35,768
I'm sure he just wants to borrow my French notes or whatever.
264
00:10:35,768 --> 00:10:38,437
[ Chuckles ] That's not what he wants.
265
00:10:38,437 --> 00:10:41,807
Okay, so, like, how would you respond?
266
00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:44,477
[ Cellphone chimes ]
267
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:45,978
♪♪
268
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:48,414
No, what? She looks like a glazed donut.
269
00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:51,117
[ Laughs ]
270
00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:53,519
♪ I run this fucking club ♪
271
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:55,988
♪ I run this fucking club ♪
272
00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:57,790
♪ I-I run this fucking club ♪
273
00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:59,659
♪ Run this club, I run this club ♪
274
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,727
♪ Bottle service on deck, niggas know who I beyah ♪
275
00:11:01,727 --> 00:11:04,130
♪ Turnt up in the cut before a late night red eye ♪
276
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:06,499
♪ Could never do this like this, now these motherfuckers see why ♪
277
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,434
♪ Watch me throw it back and knock a nigga out his Filas ♪
278
00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:10,436
♪ Pussy game exclusive, head game malicious ♪
279
00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:12,538
♪ Put it on 'em good, turn an atheist religious ♪
280
00:11:12,538 --> 00:11:13,873
♪ Carrots on my wrists keep these bitches in stitches ♪
281
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:16,208
Wait, pull over here.
282
00:11:16,208 --> 00:11:19,712
♪♪
283
00:11:19,712 --> 00:11:21,347
Can we take a picture?
284
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,848
My mom thinks all skaters are drug addicts.
285
00:11:22,848 --> 00:11:25,451
I love it!
286
00:11:26,585 --> 00:11:27,853
So cute!
287
00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:29,989
Yo!
288
00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:32,525
Chester: Oh, my gosh.
289
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,994
Yo! Hey! Hey.
290
00:11:34,994 --> 00:11:37,930
Yo, you ever break a finger?
291
00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:40,733
Uh, when I was, like, 8.
292
00:11:40,733 --> 00:11:42,935
How'd you break it? Playing T-ball.
293
00:11:42,935 --> 00:11:44,837
Yeah, see? I knew it was you.
294
00:11:44,837 --> 00:11:48,040
She joined the team, and on her first day, she broke her finger.
295
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:49,875
Wait, you were there? Uh-huh.
296
00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:51,811
And this is just coming up now?
297
00:11:51,811 --> 00:11:54,180
Why's everyone gotta tell everyone everything all the time?
298
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:56,782
Uh, you coulda just been like, "We know each other."
299
00:11:56,782 --> 00:11:58,350
For what? I don't know.
300
00:11:58,350 --> 00:12:00,853
That's what you do to, like, be friendly.
301
00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:03,489
Okay, well, I'm being friendly now.
302
00:12:03,489 --> 00:12:05,224
How do you even remember that?
303
00:12:05,224 --> 00:12:07,460
'Cause when you showed up, I was like,
304
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:09,462
"That Gretita girl's a pussy and gonna suck,"
305
00:12:09,462 --> 00:12:11,797
and then the ball hit you and your finger was,
306
00:12:11,797 --> 00:12:13,399
like, dangling from your hand
307
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,201
and you didn't cry, and then I was like,
308
00:12:15,201 --> 00:12:17,169
"Shit, that Gretita's got nerves of steel.
309
00:12:17,169 --> 00:12:19,371
I want her on my team." But you never came back.
310
00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:22,708
And now she is on your team.
311
00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:24,677
Can you hang? Um, I --
312
00:12:24,677 --> 00:12:26,345
Well, we got fake dating to do,
313
00:12:26,345 --> 00:12:28,280
and you guys obviously have your sports
314
00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,983
and steel girl stuff to catch up on, so byyyeee.
315
00:12:30,983 --> 00:12:34,019
But -- Love you, Gretita!
316
00:12:34,019 --> 00:12:36,522
What -- I don't love you!
317
00:12:36,522 --> 00:12:41,827
♪♪
318
00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:42,962
You wanna skate?
319
00:12:42,962 --> 00:12:46,932
♪♪
320
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:48,834
This was really nice of you today.
321
00:12:50,035 --> 00:12:51,237
As your friend, I think they're right.
322
00:12:51,237 --> 00:12:52,938
You should text Bo.
323
00:12:52,938 --> 00:12:55,374
I mean, my mom's always like,
324
00:12:55,374 --> 00:12:58,844
"Write it out, take six deep breaths, see how you feel,
325
00:12:58,844 --> 00:13:01,113
and if you want to send, then send."
326
00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:02,782
So, it could be like, "Hi.
327
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:06,118
That was a weird first date, but I really like you.
328
00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,586
Can we try again?"
329
00:13:07,586 --> 00:13:09,522
Wait, did you write that on my phone?
330
00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:11,190
Yeah, 'cause you're driving, but I'm not gonna send it.
331
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:12,792
No -- No, stop! Give me my phone!
332
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,493
Give it to me! [ Cellphone chimes ]
333
00:13:14,493 --> 00:13:16,829
Oh, my God. I am so sorry. What the fuck did you do?
334
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:18,264
What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? I was just trying to help!
335
00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:19,665
No! I swear to God!
336
00:13:19,665 --> 00:13:21,734
No, you fucked everything up!
337
00:13:21,734 --> 00:13:24,003
[ Tires screech ]
338
00:13:24,003 --> 00:13:26,672
♪ Si quieres conmigo vete acostumbrando ♪
339
00:13:26,672 --> 00:13:28,574
[ Seatbelt clicks ]
340
00:13:28,574 --> 00:13:32,411
♪ Y si no te gusta, ya otro está llamando ♪
341
00:13:32,411 --> 00:13:35,281
♪ Yo tomo las decisiones, yo escojo las posiciones ♪
342
00:13:35,281 --> 00:13:38,350
♪ Puedes tener los cojones, pero yo los pantalones ♪
343
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:41,554
[ Cellphone chimes ] ♪ No, no, she can't do it like me ♪
344
00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:44,824
♪ Throw it down, wishin' you could see the look upon your face ♪
345
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:49,128
♪ Eh, I'm your little mamacita ♪
346
00:13:49,128 --> 00:13:51,430
♪ Haces todo lo que diga, yeah ♪
347
00:13:51,430 --> 00:13:54,834
♪ Si estás conmigo solo mando yo, yeah ♪
348
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:56,001
♪ Aquí no es cómo... ♪
349
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:57,169
♪♪
350
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:59,004
Riley: Yes!
351
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:02,041
♪♪
352
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,944
Oh, my God, the '90s were so fucked.
353
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:08,414
What would it be like to have to call people for everything?
354
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:09,682
So stressful.
355
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:11,016
You couldn't just text what's up.
356
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,685
You'd have to be like,
357
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,753
"I'm dialing 10 numbers, and hi, how are you doing?
358
00:14:14,753 --> 00:14:16,722
"Let me hear all the stuff I don't want to hear.
359
00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:19,358
I just wanted to text you what's up."
360
00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:22,895
I'm so glad we were not born then.
361
00:14:22,895 --> 00:14:26,332
[ Doorbell rings ]
362
00:14:26,332 --> 00:14:28,901
Fuck. This was a bad idea.
363
00:14:30,669 --> 00:14:32,137
Hey. Hi.
364
00:14:32,137 --> 00:14:33,873
Hey. Sorry.
365
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:35,941
This is -- This is my brother, Evan. Oh, Evan, hi.
366
00:14:35,941 --> 00:14:37,676
Who is it? We're playing Monopoly, if you want to play.
367
00:14:37,676 --> 00:14:39,411
No, nobody. Go away. No, nobody wants to play.
368
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:41,146
I like Monopoly. Our Monopoly is different.
369
00:14:41,146 --> 00:14:42,648
Like, our rules are really different.
370
00:14:42,648 --> 00:14:44,583
I mean, I'm game if you are. Oh, amazing.
371
00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:46,886
I love Monopoly. Come in. Yeah. Oh, Riley's here, too.
372
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:49,121
Hey, what's up?
373
00:14:51,323 --> 00:14:53,325
Okay, so, Evan, you roll the dice
374
00:14:53,325 --> 00:14:55,661
and then move your token, and then wherever you land,
375
00:14:55,661 --> 00:14:57,730
the property, we all buy together.
376
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,498
Okay, so everybody take a token. How much is this one?
377
00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:01,267
Can you hand me one? Oh, sure.
378
00:15:01,267 --> 00:15:03,002
Oh, Evan... Here you go, buddy.
379
00:15:03,002 --> 00:15:05,638
...you want to try and land on the community fridges,
380
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:07,439
'cause then you'll get money from the community garden
381
00:15:07,439 --> 00:15:09,108
if you land on the fridges. Okay.
382
00:15:09,108 --> 00:15:12,244
Just in case you run out of money. Mm.
383
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:16,682
Okay, so everyone starts off with 500 Bernie Bucks.
384
00:15:16,682 --> 00:15:20,486
Wait, so how you play, you can't get a monopoly?
385
00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:23,756
Hayden: No. Capitalism is white supremacy.
386
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,624
So, Evan, you'll be a freshman next year?
387
00:15:25,624 --> 00:15:27,760
Yeah, I'll be a freshman next year.
388
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,828
Yeah, we're gonna get to play together when he makes varsity.
389
00:15:29,828 --> 00:15:32,765
And he's totally going to because he's so good. Oh.
390
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:35,768
Maybe -- Do you want to come to a game? Cool. I love baseball.
391
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,503
Yeah? No, you don't.
392
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:40,239
You said all professional sports are just male-dominated,
393
00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:42,408
money-making, rapist-defender organizations.
394
00:15:42,408 --> 00:15:45,477
No, I did not say that. Just some.
395
00:15:45,477 --> 00:15:47,579
Anyway, I don't even know if they'll let me try out
396
00:15:47,579 --> 00:15:49,481
since I'm trans, so I don't know.
397
00:15:49,481 --> 00:15:51,750
Well, then we'll boycott or protest or whatever you need.
398
00:15:51,750 --> 00:15:53,585
Alan: Also, Jesus Christ, Renée Richards?
399
00:15:53,585 --> 00:15:55,521
Mm-hmm. Alright, here we go.
400
00:16:02,361 --> 00:16:04,229
Hey! Hey.
401
00:16:04,229 --> 00:16:07,166
You -- I-I know. A nerd who doesn't cosplay.
402
00:16:07,166 --> 00:16:10,135
I'm full of surprises.
403
00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:12,137
You look amazing. Oh.
404
00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:13,605
Thank you.
405
00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:15,374
Um, I think that we -- It's really ni--
406
00:16:15,374 --> 00:16:17,576
Oh, sorry. No, sorry. You go. What?
407
00:16:17,576 --> 00:16:19,345
No. It was nothing.
408
00:16:19,345 --> 00:16:22,481
I am so nervous.
409
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:24,149
Um, do you wanna go to the store
410
00:16:24,149 --> 00:16:25,718
and get some snacks for the movie?
411
00:16:25,718 --> 00:16:28,087
She's an emotional eater. But also thrifty.
412
00:16:29,755 --> 00:16:31,223
Okay.
413
00:16:31,223 --> 00:16:36,762
♪♪
414
00:16:36,762 --> 00:16:42,134
♪♪
415
00:16:42,134 --> 00:16:44,937
Do it! Now! Bunny hop!
416
00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:46,305
I can't, I can't, I can't!
417
00:16:46,305 --> 00:16:48,607
Shit! Ow!
418
00:16:48,607 --> 00:16:49,942
Fuck! Ugh.
419
00:16:49,942 --> 00:16:51,977
Are you okay?
420
00:16:51,977 --> 00:16:53,112
[ Groans ]
421
00:16:53,112 --> 00:16:55,147
[ Laughs ]
422
00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:58,984
You okay? Yes.
423
00:16:58,984 --> 00:17:00,219
See? She don't get hurt.
424
00:17:00,219 --> 00:17:01,687
[ Laughing ]
425
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:05,791
Wow. She got a face lift.
426
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:09,595
I love when regular things make me feel rich!
427
00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:13,465
Okay. Girl came correct with this artisanal bakery.
428
00:17:13,465 --> 00:17:16,535
So, like, one of those for sure, right? Uh, you can.
429
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:19,738
I can't exactly have dairy, tree nuts, shellfish, soy,
430
00:17:19,738 --> 00:17:23,342
or, um, gluten. Oh, Jesus.
431
00:17:23,342 --> 00:17:26,045
Guess we should get out of the yummy dessert section.
432
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,513
Well, now I feel bad.
433
00:17:27,513 --> 00:17:29,681
No, sorry. That -- This is how I flirt.
434
00:17:29,681 --> 00:17:32,584
My love language is bitch. Ignore me.
435
00:17:32,584 --> 00:17:34,186
But, um...
436
00:17:34,186 --> 00:17:37,022
before we go any further... What?
437
00:17:37,022 --> 00:17:40,559
Where do you fall on Twizzlers?
438
00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:43,862
I love them.
439
00:17:43,862 --> 00:17:46,832
No, I'm kidding. They taste like a combo of ass and nothing.
440
00:17:46,832 --> 00:17:48,667
Right? Thank God.
441
00:17:48,667 --> 00:17:51,003
I was, like, freaking the fuck out for a second.
442
00:17:51,003 --> 00:17:52,738
Yeah, like, the only good thing about Twizzlers
443
00:17:52,738 --> 00:17:54,873
is, like, the ropey one with the nine strands.
444
00:17:54,873 --> 00:17:56,542
You can make braids. Yes!
445
00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:58,911
You get it! Okay, come on.
446
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:01,113
Let's go find you a snack that's not gonna kill you.
447
00:18:01,113 --> 00:18:03,382
Cooper: Tonight was amazing. Thank you so much for having me.
448
00:18:03,382 --> 00:18:04,783
Yeah, of course. Thanks for coming.
449
00:18:04,783 --> 00:18:07,252
No, yeah, that was awesome. Um...
450
00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:10,055
and, like, socialism -- like, who knew?
451
00:18:10,055 --> 00:18:11,790
And I-I think it was --
452
00:18:11,790 --> 00:18:13,592
I think it was really good for Evan, too.
453
00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:15,794
Oh, is -- is that why you wanted to hang out?
454
00:18:15,794 --> 00:18:19,865
For him? Huh? No. No. No. I just --
455
00:18:19,865 --> 00:18:22,601
I just wanted to hang out with you.
456
00:18:22,601 --> 00:18:24,269
It's just, my parents -- they don't like it
457
00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:26,271
when I leave him home alone, so...
458
00:18:26,271 --> 00:18:28,407
Oh.
459
00:18:28,407 --> 00:18:31,210
Oh. Um...sorry.
460
00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:33,545
I'm -- I'm...
461
00:18:33,545 --> 00:18:36,381
I don't know what I am. Sorry.
462
00:18:36,381 --> 00:18:38,250
Yeah, you do.
463
00:18:46,325 --> 00:18:48,494
Oh. Okay. Sorry! Uh, thank you!
464
00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,696
Bye. Thank you! Bye!
465
00:18:50,696 --> 00:18:51,897
Bye!
466
00:18:51,897 --> 00:18:53,699
Oh, my fucking God! Why did I do that?
467
00:18:53,699 --> 00:18:55,367
I don't know. Why did you do that?
468
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:57,402
I don't know.
469
00:18:57,402 --> 00:18:59,638
Oh, my God.
470
00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:02,141
And then we moved from St. Louis to Anaheim
471
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,609
when I was 10, which was great,
472
00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:06,311
'cause I was like, "Peace out, bullies.
473
00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:08,413
See ya later, suckas."
474
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:11,183
Yes. I feel that. I got bullied, too.
475
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,818
No way. You? Yeah.
476
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,753
I-I was like one of three black kids in elementary.
477
00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:17,789
So, a lot of hair touching, and then, like,
478
00:19:17,789 --> 00:19:20,926
the weird clicking tongues thing during the Africa unit.
479
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:22,594
Mnh-mnh.
480
00:19:22,594 --> 00:19:25,731
Uh, I got people making fun of my name,
481
00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:30,602
w-what does goat taste like, and, um, I should just convert
482
00:19:30,602 --> 00:19:32,237
because it's worth it for bacon.
483
00:19:32,237 --> 00:19:33,872
People made fun of Bo?
484
00:19:33,872 --> 00:19:36,375
It's short for Bomani. It's an Egyptian name.
485
00:19:36,375 --> 00:19:39,044
It means "warrior."
486
00:19:39,044 --> 00:19:41,713
Bomani. I love that.
487
00:19:43,482 --> 00:19:46,919
I've always wanted to read one of these cheesy romance novels.
488
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,854
[ Laughs ]
489
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:54,026
♪♪
490
00:19:54,026 --> 00:19:57,229
Where are you going? Come on.
491
00:19:59,998 --> 00:20:01,500
These hos are really serious
492
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:03,802
about their supermarket experience.
493
00:20:05,003 --> 00:20:08,173
Luxury. The luxury!
494
00:20:08,173 --> 00:20:10,275
[ Chuckles ]
495
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:12,778
[ Clears throat ]
496
00:20:12,778 --> 00:20:17,382
A select, AKA random reading from the acclaimed
497
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:20,752
"Built for Pleasure" by Rita Steelwood.
498
00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:23,255
"She stared at the chiseled, barely-clothed man
499
00:20:23,255 --> 00:20:24,890
standing before her,
500
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:27,559
his piercing olive green eyes like soft moss
501
00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:30,896
in the thorny garden of her dreams." Whoa.
502
00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:33,365
Come through, showing-not-telling.
503
00:20:33,365 --> 00:20:36,235
"How was it possible that in his unwavering glance,
504
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:39,871
a deep, intimate knowledge seemed to pass between them?
505
00:20:39,871 --> 00:20:43,375
After all, she had only assembled him an hour ago."
506
00:20:43,375 --> 00:20:46,078
Oh, shit. We got a male sex robot.
507
00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:48,914
"She moved closer to inspect her handiwork.
508
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:50,415
He had become human!
509
00:20:50,415 --> 00:20:52,718
His skin had become warm and supple,
510
00:20:52,718 --> 00:20:55,320
and a heart beat steadily beneath the hot,
511
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:58,724
firm cage of his chest."
512
00:20:58,724 --> 00:21:00,626
I don't know how to feel about the fact that I am,
513
00:21:00,626 --> 00:21:03,028
like, so into this.
514
00:21:03,028 --> 00:21:04,763
Please keep reading.
515
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:11,570
"'I want you,' he said.
516
00:21:11,570 --> 00:21:15,507
'I want you right now.'
517
00:21:15,507 --> 00:21:19,711
He began to stroke his chest,
518
00:21:19,711 --> 00:21:23,715
his hand going lower and lower."
519
00:21:29,488 --> 00:21:31,490
[ Both chuckle ]
520
00:21:31,490 --> 00:21:36,762
♪♪
521
00:21:36,762 --> 00:21:38,630
[ Cellphone chimes ]
522
00:21:40,432 --> 00:21:43,068
[ Sighs ]
523
00:21:43,068 --> 00:21:44,436
You gotta be home?
524
00:21:44,436 --> 00:21:46,571
My mom wanted me to meet some cousin.
525
00:21:46,571 --> 00:21:48,106
Wait, is your mom back?
526
00:21:48,106 --> 00:21:50,776
No, but she's just still trying to control me.
527
00:21:50,776 --> 00:21:53,278
Yeah. Also, when they think something's up,
528
00:21:53,278 --> 00:21:55,280
but they don't know, it's worse.
529
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:56,915
At least, it was for me.
530
00:21:56,915 --> 00:21:58,850
I finally had to be like, "Mom, this is it.
531
00:21:58,850 --> 00:22:00,786
This is where I'm at. This is how it's gonna go."
532
00:22:00,786 --> 00:22:02,587
And then she just stopped.
533
00:22:02,587 --> 00:22:04,723
Yeah, I don't know if that's gonna work for me.
534
00:22:04,723 --> 00:22:07,125
That's what I'm saying. It's kinda more your call.
535
00:22:07,125 --> 00:22:10,228
But also, I'm an asshole, so...
536
00:22:10,228 --> 00:22:12,631
No, you're not.
537
00:22:12,631 --> 00:22:14,966
I actually am.
538
00:22:14,966 --> 00:22:17,703
I think if you like me, even though I'm an asshole,
539
00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:19,604
it's probably better than you liking me
540
00:22:19,604 --> 00:22:21,773
'cause you think I'm not an asshole.
541
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:28,947
What's with, um, you and Riley?
542
00:22:28,947 --> 00:22:31,416
Uh...
543
00:22:31,416 --> 00:22:33,151
what do you mean?
544
00:22:33,151 --> 00:22:35,420
You guys together, or...
545
00:22:35,420 --> 00:22:37,222
Not really. No.
546
00:22:37,222 --> 00:22:40,158
Yeah, I got that feeling.
547
00:22:40,158 --> 00:22:43,362
So, does that mean I can kiss you?
548
00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:45,063
'Cause I really want to.
549
00:22:52,971 --> 00:22:54,005
No.
550
00:22:54,005 --> 00:22:56,842
[ Chuckles ] No?
551
00:22:56,842 --> 00:22:59,678
No. 'Cause why?
552
00:22:59,678 --> 00:23:01,747
'Cause I don't know you.
553
00:23:02,681 --> 00:23:05,550
See? You got some asshole in you.
554
00:23:05,550 --> 00:23:07,619
[ Laughs ]
555
00:23:10,288 --> 00:23:13,392
Um...
556
00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:15,193
can you give me a ride home?
557
00:23:17,696 --> 00:23:19,297
Feeling good about our choices?
558
00:23:19,297 --> 00:23:21,967
Feeling so good.
559
00:23:21,967 --> 00:23:31,443
♪♪
560
00:23:31,443 --> 00:23:41,153
♪♪
561
00:23:41,153 --> 00:23:42,854
Thank you so much.
562
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:50,195
Hey, Andy. I'm Chester. This is Bo.
563
00:23:50,195 --> 00:23:54,366
Um, we just reconciled, so if you could just let us in,
564
00:23:54,366 --> 00:23:56,768
we would be very grateful.
565
00:23:56,768 --> 00:23:58,603
Please, please, please, please.
566
00:23:58,603 --> 00:24:01,473
Andy: Sorry, hon. No late seating. Ugh.
567
00:24:01,473 --> 00:24:03,742
They won't seat our late asses.
568
00:24:03,742 --> 00:24:06,411
Dang. Uh, sorry we missed it.
569
00:24:06,411 --> 00:24:09,247
Are you, though? No, it scared the shit outta me.
570
00:24:09,247 --> 00:24:12,617
But you came anyway, because you're Bomani.
571
00:24:18,223 --> 00:24:19,925
What now?
572
00:24:22,627 --> 00:24:24,296
"She thought about the million moments
573
00:24:24,296 --> 00:24:27,132
that conspired to lead her to this moment.
574
00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:29,301
What were the chances of something like this
575
00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:31,503
ever happening to her again?
576
00:24:31,503 --> 00:24:35,507
Unfathomable, like attempting to discern the number of stars
577
00:24:35,507 --> 00:24:38,443
in the night sky above them.
578
00:24:38,443 --> 00:24:41,947
In this moment, a deep truth took hold of her thoughts.
579
00:24:41,947 --> 00:24:44,082
If she didn't open herself up to him now,
580
00:24:44,082 --> 00:24:46,485
she'd never get the chance again...
581
00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:48,553
with anyone.
582
00:24:48,553 --> 00:24:50,021
She didn't want to be alone again.
583
00:24:50,021 --> 00:24:53,892
It had been so long, and she was so weary.
584
00:24:53,892 --> 00:24:57,896
She wanted to touch, to be touched, to feel alive again,
585
00:24:57,896 --> 00:25:02,200
but being alive meant allowing herself to be open,
586
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:07,038
earnest, ready to receive, ready to be vulnerable again.
587
00:25:07,038 --> 00:25:09,875
That was it. Vulnerability.
588
00:25:09,875 --> 00:25:12,644
She couldn't be fully giving, fully loving,
589
00:25:12,644 --> 00:25:13,912
fully committed without it,
590
00:25:13,912 --> 00:25:17,649
yet the risk felt too great.
591
00:25:17,649 --> 00:25:19,818
That's why she pulled the emotional armor
592
00:25:19,818 --> 00:25:23,255
so tightly around her for so long."
593
00:25:23,255 --> 00:25:25,156
♪ ...walked a thousand miles ♪
594
00:25:25,156 --> 00:25:28,527
"But the way he looked at her made all her armor crumble
595
00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:34,633
and blow away like the top layer of powdery snow after a storm."
596
00:25:34,633 --> 00:25:40,839
♪♪
597
00:25:42,140 --> 00:25:46,344
♪ When I wake up, well, I hope I'm gonna be ♪
598
00:25:46,344 --> 00:25:51,583
♪ I'm gonna be the man who's waking up to you ♪
599
00:25:51,583 --> 00:25:55,987
♪ And when I'm dreaming, well, I know I'm gonna dream ♪
600
00:25:55,987 --> 00:25:58,423
♪ I'm gonna dream about the time ♪
601
00:25:58,423 --> 00:26:02,027
♪ I had with you ♪
602
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:18,710
[ Keys jingle, thud ]
603
00:26:18,710 --> 00:26:20,679
[ Door opens ]
604
00:26:23,148 --> 00:26:25,150
Mami?
605
00:26:25,150 --> 00:26:28,253
♪♪
606
00:26:28,253 --> 00:26:31,623
♪ I-I-I-I-I wanna be like her ♪
607
00:26:31,623 --> 00:26:33,091
♪ Wanna be, wanna be like her ♪
608
00:26:33,091 --> 00:26:34,926
♪ Wanna be, wanna be like her ♪
609
00:26:34,926 --> 00:26:36,828
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
610
00:26:36,828 --> 00:26:39,064
♪ Be like, be like her, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
611
00:26:39,064 --> 00:26:42,100
♪ Wanna be, wanna be, wanna be, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
612
00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:43,535
♪ I wanna be like ♪
613
00:26:43,535 --> 00:26:45,170
♪ Matriarch since 14 ♪
614
00:26:45,170 --> 00:26:46,871
♪ All the grown men bend on one knee ♪
615
00:26:46,871 --> 00:26:48,473
♪ Grab it with the mysteries ♪
616
00:26:48,473 --> 00:26:50,575
♪ Swimming in questions waist deep ♪
617
00:26:50,575 --> 00:26:53,511
♪ I was looking up to the gods when I started saying ♪
618
00:26:53,511 --> 00:26:57,282
♪ Ave Maria ♪ ♪ I wanna be like ♪
619
00:26:57,282 --> 00:27:01,052
♪ To quiero this, the avant-garde mouth piece ♪
620
00:27:01,052 --> 00:27:04,289
♪ Only you can know these holy mysteries ♪
621
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:07,926
♪ Power isn't defined by your physique ♪
622
00:27:07,926 --> 00:27:10,161
♪ Ave Maria ♪
623
00:27:10,161 --> 00:27:13,231
♪ I wanna be like her ♪
624
00:27:13,231 --> 00:27:15,967
♪ Yeah, I wanna be like her ♪
625
00:27:15,967 --> 00:27:17,702
♪ Whoa, hey ♪
626
00:27:17,702 --> 00:27:21,573
♪ Quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
627
00:27:21,573 --> 00:27:25,076
♪ Quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
628
00:27:25,076 --> 00:27:28,747
♪ Quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
629
00:27:28,747 --> 00:27:31,650
♪ Hey, hey ♪
630
00:27:31,650 --> 00:27:35,520
♪ To quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
631
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:38,757
♪ Quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
632
00:27:38,757 --> 00:27:43,595
♪ Quiero this, the Avant-garde mouth piece ♪
633
00:27:43,595 --> 00:27:45,130
♪ I wanna be like ♪
46093
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