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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:00,268 --> 00:01:04,354 We've only just begun 2 00:01:07,275 --> 00:01:11,070 Before the rising sun 3 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:16,200 We've only just begun 4 00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:18,368 Day by day 5 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:22,873 Together, together 6 00:01:23,374 --> 00:01:25,959 Going together just the two of us 7 00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:28,337 Ah. 8 00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:49,316 No! What is that? 9 00:01:55,073 --> 00:01:56,907 Aah! Come on, come on! 10 00:01:58,409 --> 00:01:59,868 Come on. 11 00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:04,832 I remember the day that we met 12 00:02:04,999 --> 00:02:07,334 I needed someone You needed someone too 13 00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:08,502 Shut up! 14 00:02:09,420 --> 00:02:11,171 Stop it! 15 00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:16,802 Shut up! 16 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:21,306 Oh. 17 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:36,780 Kiss. The devil's music. 18 00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:43,245 You say you wanna go for a spin 19 00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:46,748 The party's just begun, we'll let you in 20 00:02:46,958 --> 00:02:49,877 You drive us wild We'll drive you 21 00:02:50,086 --> 00:02:51,879 Crazy 22 00:02:54,048 --> 00:02:57,259 You keep on shouting You keep on shouting 23 00:02:57,468 --> 00:02:59,094 I can't fucking hear you! 24 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:04,933 I wanna rock and roll all night 25 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:07,811 And party every day 26 00:03:24,454 --> 00:03:26,997 You keep on shouting You keep on shouting 27 00:03:27,999 --> 00:03:30,500 - What? - Give it to me, baby! 28 00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:34,963 I wanna rock and roll all night 29 00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:36,423 Let's party! 30 00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,091 And party every day 31 00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:40,052 Have a party, what a rush 32 00:03:40,261 --> 00:03:41,845 I wanna rock until I die! 33 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:04,660 Thank you, Cleveland! 34 00:04:04,869 --> 00:04:06,036 You've been a great crowd. 35 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:09,748 But after three and a half hours of some kick-ass rock 'n' roll... 36 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:11,875 ...and seven encores on top of that... 37 00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:15,921 ...I'm sorry to say that, uh, we gotta get back to our hotel rooms... 38 00:04:16,130 --> 00:04:17,464 ...and fuck some groupies, so... 39 00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:24,054 What are you doing, man? You put that... 40 00:04:24,472 --> 00:04:26,640 You fucking asshole, man. That's my bass. 41 00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:28,767 Just one more day of school... 42 00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:32,145 ...to get through, girls, before tomorrow night. 43 00:04:32,355 --> 00:04:35,857 Come on, Detroit, Michigan. 44 00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:38,902 - You wanted the best! - You got the best! 45 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,780 The hottest band in the world! 46 00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:43,657 Kiss! 47 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:52,582 Who is it? 48 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,668 Shit, man, it's Jam's mom. 49 00:04:54,877 --> 00:04:58,380 - What? It's my mom? - Cover all this shit up, man. 50 00:04:58,589 --> 00:05:00,424 Spray something. Smells like dope in here. 51 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,343 Just like Jam's mom to ruin the fucking party. 52 00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:05,971 It smells in here, man. 53 00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,978 Jeremiah, you get out here this instant. 54 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,065 - Hi, Mom. - Now! 55 00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:21,320 - What's up? - The devil's body count, that's what's up. 56 00:05:21,529 --> 00:05:23,989 Don't you know what Kiss stands for? 57 00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:27,826 Knights In Satan's Service. Where is Karen Carpenter? 58 00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:29,828 - How would I know? - Donny and Marie too? 59 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:32,205 Why would I have Donny and Marie? 60 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,416 Whoa, whoa. Unh! 61 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:37,127 I had a nightmare that bullshit like this might happen. 62 00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,379 If he misses Peter Criss' drum solo... 63 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:41,631 ...he won't be able to continue with his life. 64 00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:43,467 Lex, quit jinxing us, man. 65 00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:45,802 Nobody's missing that concert tomorrow night. 66 00:06:27,678 --> 00:06:30,263 They're larger-than-life space-age comic book heroes... 67 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:33,350 ...the most sensational phenomenon of the past decade. 68 00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:34,684 Their fans are fanatical. 69 00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:37,979 Each fan has a favorite, each one a fantasy. 70 00:06:41,984 --> 00:06:43,110 Oh, my God. 71 00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:46,530 The rock 'n' roll band Kiss is in town. 72 00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:50,117 For some people, that spells trouble with a capital T. 73 00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:09,678 I shall resign the presidency effective at noon tomorrow. 74 00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:11,388 Kiss is hotter than hell. 75 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,807 The protesters are mainly religious groups. 76 00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:15,767 Satan worship and drugs among our kids. 77 00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:18,395 Each 12-and-a-half-inch figure sold separately. 78 00:07:43,921 --> 00:07:45,130 No! 79 00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:12,282 Hello? 80 00:08:14,535 --> 00:08:15,577 - Jam. - Hawk? 81 00:08:15,786 --> 00:08:17,746 Listen up. We're in a bit of a quandary right now. 82 00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:20,749 They're fucking gone. 83 00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:23,793 - What's gone, man? - What do you think, man? The Kiss tickets. 84 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,672 - Gone? - Please tell me you have them, man. 85 00:08:27,882 --> 00:08:30,342 - Why would I have the Kiss tickets? - I don't know, man. 86 00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:32,761 Just check whatever you were wearing last night. 87 00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:36,431 Now, man! 88 00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:45,357 I got them, man. 89 00:08:45,566 --> 00:08:47,067 Heh. He's got them. 90 00:08:47,276 --> 00:08:49,402 I must have taken Trip's jacket by mistake. 91 00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:52,906 - I'm really sorry about that. - Oh, don't be such a wuss, Jam. 92 00:08:53,115 --> 00:08:54,866 Are you grounded because of last night? 93 00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:58,912 Oh, yeah, but, uh, has that ever stopped me before? 94 00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,122 See you guys at school. 95 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,708 - Phew. - Poor Jam, man. 96 00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:08,296 Imagine having to stash your Kiss records in Carly Simon album covers. 97 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:10,006 How shitty is that? 98 00:09:10,508 --> 00:09:14,094 No question. Mrs. Bruce is a psycho bitch from hell. 99 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,347 You're one to talk, Lex. Your mom's a fucking dyke. 100 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:20,976 Just because she's a female gynecologist doesn't mean she's a lesbian. 101 00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:25,438 And even if she was, at least my mom didn't give birth to me while she was on LSD. 102 00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:26,648 Shrooms. 103 00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,483 Will you guys quit the mom-bashing? 104 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:32,612 I mean, look. Look, Lex's mom is cool because she lets us spend the night. 105 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:34,406 If it wasn't for your mom, Trip... 106 00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:37,450 ...we wouldn't have smoked that fine Panama Red last night. 107 00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:41,580 So leave the women who gave you life out of it. They're both cool in my book. 108 00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,206 Let's go. 109 00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,546 - Trip, you asshole. - What? 110 00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:52,340 Man, you spilled the bong water all over the bed. 111 00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:53,842 Stupid son of a... 112 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:57,012 Come on. 113 00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:58,930 Oh, my... 114 00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:02,058 Jeremiah, it's time to go. Get... 115 00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:04,352 What are you doing? 116 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:08,481 Just, uh, whew, getting a little sunshine. 117 00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:11,192 You're gonna be late if you don't hurry up and change. 118 00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:12,986 Change? 119 00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:16,156 What's, uh, wrong with the clothes I wore last night? 120 00:10:16,365 --> 00:10:18,617 It's dirty laundry, for one thing. 121 00:10:18,826 --> 00:10:21,745 And another, you still haven't tried on the clothes I bought you. 122 00:10:21,954 --> 00:10:25,332 You're skating on thin ice already, young man, so I wouldn't push my luck. 123 00:10:25,541 --> 00:10:26,833 Now, get out of those rags. 124 00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:28,251 Mom, it's... 125 00:10:28,461 --> 00:10:30,545 And besides, those jeans are so tight. 126 00:10:30,755 --> 00:10:32,714 I can see your penis. 127 00:10:32,923 --> 00:10:34,591 Excuse me. 128 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,677 This jacket, it stinks of BO. 129 00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:40,764 It's enough to make a person sick. 130 00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,558 Now, remember, I have my church meeting... 131 00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:46,227 ...so you'll be on the honor system tonight. 132 00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:49,064 I'll be home a little after 1. 133 00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:54,361 And if you've been partying or playing that satanic Kiss music... 134 00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:58,448 ...need I remind you of the consequences? 135 00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:00,909 Uh... 136 00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,370 Grounded for the rest of the year? 137 00:11:03,829 --> 00:11:08,750 Oh, you are a smart boy, Jeremiah. Put these on before they go out of style. 138 00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,628 Come on, take it. 139 00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:30,105 Man, school. What a fucking waste of time, man. 140 00:11:30,314 --> 00:11:33,274 I wish someone would tell these chicks that disco's dead! 141 00:11:33,984 --> 00:11:36,403 Don't stare too long, boys. You'll go blind. 142 00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:37,612 Yeah, right. 143 00:11:39,281 --> 00:11:42,951 Stellas. I hate Stellas almost as much as I hate dogs, man. 144 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:45,787 Yeah, man. Same species when you think about it. 145 00:11:53,045 --> 00:11:56,631 Shit, man. That geek looks like Jam. 146 00:11:58,175 --> 00:12:00,009 Man, that geek is Jam. 147 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:01,803 Hey, dork! 148 00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:12,105 Heh. So who did your wardrobe? Tad the preppie sailboat captain? 149 00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,983 Hey, man, my mom had me over a barrel, all right? 150 00:12:15,192 --> 00:12:18,111 After last night, I had to let her dress me today. 151 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:21,072 - Give-and-take relationship. - She gives shit and you take it. 152 00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:23,408 Hey, hand over the tickets. I wanna hold them. 153 00:12:23,617 --> 00:12:24,701 The tickets? 154 00:12:24,910 --> 00:12:29,539 - What? - Well, there's a, uh, little, little problem. 155 00:12:30,207 --> 00:12:33,585 - They're still at my house in Trip's jacket. - What are you talking about? 156 00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:35,879 She was standing over me when I was changing. 157 00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:39,674 - You are so pathetic. - Man, that's some sick shit right there, man. 158 00:12:39,884 --> 00:12:42,218 I mean, does she comb your ass hair for you too? 159 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,846 If she even smells those tickets, she'll destroy them. 160 00:12:45,055 --> 00:12:47,474 We get fucked out of seeing Kiss for the third year. 161 00:12:47,683 --> 00:12:49,809 It's gonna be okay. Don't worry about it. 162 00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:52,020 They're at my house. They're perfectly safe. 163 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:55,315 We'll go there and pick them up. My mom's not even gonna be there. 164 00:12:55,524 --> 00:13:00,153 Dudes, hours from now, we're actually gonna be seeing Kiss. 165 00:13:00,362 --> 00:13:02,697 All right, we'll just double-time it to your house. 166 00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:06,826 We'll grab the tickets, then we'll head to the train station for the 3:45... 167 00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:09,829 ...to Detroit Rock City! - Whoo! 168 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,039 God! 169 00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:16,044 Well, as they say in the tampon biz, see you next period. 170 00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:23,259 Jerk. 171 00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:46,741 - Oh. - Heh. I'm sorry. 172 00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:48,618 It's not a problem. 173 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,245 Thanks. 174 00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:52,038 Fine. 175 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:01,798 - Hey, Beth. - Yes? 176 00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,928 - I'm so sorry. - Mr. Bruce, Ms. Bumsteen... 177 00:14:07,137 --> 00:14:08,638 ...is there a problem? 178 00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:11,724 Uh, no, there's no problem. 179 00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:14,477 I'm so sorry. 180 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:15,854 Oh, don't worry about it. 181 00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:23,695 - Jeremiah. - Yeah? 182 00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,239 I wanted to tell you something. 183 00:14:26,824 --> 00:14:27,824 What? 184 00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:33,663 I know we don't, uh, know each other that well or anything, but... 185 00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:35,164 - But what? - Um... 186 00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:42,881 Today is gonna be the last time I can... 187 00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:44,799 I'm mov... 188 00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:47,343 Jeremiah Bruce, please come to the office. 189 00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:48,511 Ooh! 190 00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,513 Jeremiah Bruce, come to the office immediately. 191 00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:54,392 Give me that microphone. Jeremiah Bruce, this is your mother. 192 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:57,979 You are in big trouble, young man. 193 00:14:58,188 --> 00:15:01,649 What I found in the pocket of that stinky, smelly jacket of yours... 194 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:05,862 ...has me more than livid. You get your little fanny out of that seat... 195 00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:08,531 ...and you meet me in the front office. 196 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:10,533 How dare you do this to me. 197 00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:13,411 How dare you humiliate me after I work so hard for you. 198 00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,330 You take my hard-earned money... 199 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:20,835 ...and you and your idiot friends spend it on Kiss tickets? 200 00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:22,503 Kiss tickets! 201 00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:24,380 Kiss tickets! 202 00:15:47,696 --> 00:15:48,696 Sit. 203 00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:54,077 - Mom, you don't understand. - Oh, I understand perfectly. 204 00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:56,788 And so will Father Phillip McNulty. 205 00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:00,458 You're sending me to boarding school? 206 00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:01,918 What else can I do? 207 00:16:02,127 --> 00:16:05,505 Records, magazines, comic books, that's one thing. 208 00:16:05,714 --> 00:16:07,882 But tickets. Tickets. 209 00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:11,594 Do you realize what this means? That you are no longer content... 210 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:15,181 ...merely hearing their awful music and looking at photos of their faces. 211 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:20,269 Now you wanna see the devil in the flesh. You wanna reach out and touch pure evil. 212 00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:22,146 And in Detroit, no less. 213 00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:05,773 It's been a long time coming, Jeremiah. 214 00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:10,111 But you are finally going to get the kind of discipline that you deserve. 215 00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:12,739 - But, Mom, you... - Shut up. 216 00:17:26,253 --> 00:17:28,880 I knew it. We're completely fucked. 217 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:33,092 For once, Lex is right. Can't get any worse from here. 218 00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:37,055 I hope you rodents have hall passes. 219 00:17:37,264 --> 00:17:38,723 Fuck, it's Elvis. 220 00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:44,979 Could that be three detentions I smell? 221 00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:48,316 All right. Second floor, girls' bathroom. He'll never find us there. 222 00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:59,827 Fuck! Son of a bitch, man! 223 00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:02,872 Take it easy, man. This is the girls' crapper, remember? 224 00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:08,377 Oh, wake up, Lex. We just watched Jam's mom torch our fucking Kiss tickets, man. 225 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:12,548 Not REO Speedwagon, not Journey, not the Bay City Rollers. 226 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,343 Kiss, man. If you can think of a better reason... 227 00:18:15,552 --> 00:18:18,888 ...to trash a girls' bathroom, I'd sure like to hear it. 228 00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:21,933 What the fuck are you doing? 229 00:18:22,142 --> 00:18:23,768 - This is school. - So what? 230 00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:29,357 We're clear, dudes. 231 00:18:32,528 --> 00:18:34,070 Let's go. 232 00:18:36,573 --> 00:18:39,450 - Shit. A skirt, a skirt. - Oh, shit. 233 00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:06,519 Sherry Van Hafton. 234 00:19:06,728 --> 00:19:09,522 Shit, I've had the hots for her since second grade. 235 00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:20,533 Man, I've never heard a girl blow ass before. 236 00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:36,424 - Get the fuck out of here, man! - Sorry. 237 00:19:53,317 --> 00:19:56,319 God forbid someday you have a son like you, Jeremiah. 238 00:19:56,528 --> 00:19:58,404 A boy who lies through his teeth... 239 00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:02,158 ...buys demonic records and smokes the dope. 240 00:20:36,026 --> 00:20:37,652 Sorry. Sorry. 241 00:20:45,118 --> 00:20:46,786 Anyone up for an enema? 242 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,624 - Shit, man. - Maybe some music will cheer us up. 243 00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:58,297 This is Simple Simon on the rock of Detroit... 244 00:20:58,882 --> 00:21:02,510 ...home of the biggest Kiss giveaway in the history of the universe! 245 00:21:02,719 --> 00:21:06,430 I got four front-row tickets along with four backstage passes... 246 00:21:06,890 --> 00:21:09,642 ...to the concert tonight at Cobo Hall. 247 00:21:09,851 --> 00:21:14,855 And I'm giving them to the 106th caller who can tell me the real names... 248 00:21:15,065 --> 00:21:17,858 ...of each Kiss band member. - Oh, shit. 249 00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:21,237 Oh, no. 250 00:21:23,782 --> 00:21:27,118 This is horseshit. It's too bad we're stuck in this prison. 251 00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:31,914 I got it. 252 00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:37,712 Mr. Verudi, get back to your bench. 253 00:21:37,921 --> 00:21:41,340 Mr. Johansen, I gotta take a leak like you would not believe. 254 00:21:41,550 --> 00:21:43,759 Put a clothespin on it till the end of class. 255 00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:47,847 But, Mr. J, you know, ever since my doctor, he put me on these salt pills... 256 00:21:48,265 --> 00:21:49,849 Salt pills? 257 00:21:50,058 --> 00:21:51,726 Don't insult my intelligence, Verudi. 258 00:21:51,935 --> 00:21:56,355 Oh, man, I'm taking a leak in my pants. 259 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:03,946 - Yes. - Get the hell out of here, Verudi. 260 00:22:04,197 --> 00:22:05,573 You disgust me. 261 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:23,716 I need to be connected to the WURP contest line. 262 00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:25,176 Now, lady, come on. 263 00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:29,638 Oh, yeah, man! 264 00:22:33,226 --> 00:22:34,435 - I won! - What? 265 00:22:34,644 --> 00:22:36,729 We... We won! 266 00:22:36,938 --> 00:22:38,606 - We won! - What? 267 00:22:38,815 --> 00:22:40,691 We're going to Detroit, baby! 268 00:22:40,901 --> 00:22:42,026 - We're going? - Yeah! 269 00:22:42,235 --> 00:22:43,736 Yeah! 270 00:22:43,945 --> 00:22:45,112 Yeah! 271 00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:50,284 Man, this is the greatest thing that ever happened to me in school. 272 00:22:50,494 --> 00:22:53,412 Not only are we on for Kiss in Detroit... 273 00:22:53,622 --> 00:22:57,041 ...but we're gonna be sitting front row center, man. 274 00:22:57,250 --> 00:23:00,252 Guys, guys, our band Mystery is a quartet, right? 275 00:23:00,462 --> 00:23:02,630 We can't go on the road without our drummer. 276 00:23:02,839 --> 00:23:05,549 Jam's mom said something about taking him to St. Bernard's. 277 00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:07,802 I say we go up there, bust him out of there. 278 00:23:08,011 --> 00:23:09,887 Man, St. Bernard's is in the next county. 279 00:23:10,097 --> 00:23:14,850 So? Your mom's car has a CB, radar detector, cruise control, check. 280 00:23:15,060 --> 00:23:17,520 We're not stealing my mom's car. That's not happening. 281 00:23:17,729 --> 00:23:20,856 - Damn right we are, man. - All I need is one ding on that Volvo... 282 00:23:21,066 --> 00:23:23,609 ...and I'm fucked when my mom gets back from Cincinnati. 283 00:23:23,819 --> 00:23:25,861 She won't even know we touched it, Lex. 284 00:23:26,321 --> 00:23:28,781 If one thing happens to the car, I'm blaming it on you. 285 00:23:28,990 --> 00:23:31,492 - Say you drugged me or something. - I say we get out of here. 286 00:23:31,910 --> 00:23:34,995 - Hold on. We're ditching school? - About time, if you ask me. 287 00:23:35,205 --> 00:23:38,707 I'm just going through the motions till I'm old enough to drop out anyway. 288 00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,876 Shit. Shit. Guys, Elvis alert. 289 00:23:42,212 --> 00:23:45,756 I notice the trays match your outfits. Did you plan that? 290 00:23:49,719 --> 00:23:51,637 Excuse me, ladies. 291 00:23:51,847 --> 00:23:53,848 Ew! He stinks. 292 00:24:23,753 --> 00:24:26,172 Hey. Hey, I'm responsible for that. 293 00:24:51,406 --> 00:24:55,993 No! 294 00:25:02,959 --> 00:25:04,710 Pray hard, Jeremiah. 295 00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:08,088 - God loves you. - That he does. 296 00:25:08,924 --> 00:25:11,717 God bless you, Father McNulty. 297 00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:18,432 Jeremiah. 298 00:25:20,268 --> 00:25:23,312 Now, if you think that recklessness and disobedience... 299 00:25:23,522 --> 00:25:26,273 ...can get you expelled, think again. 300 00:25:26,483 --> 00:25:30,277 Now, St. Bernard's may punish you even for the slightest digression... 301 00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:34,114 ...but it'll never cast you out, even for the largest. 302 00:25:34,324 --> 00:25:39,203 So here you are, Jeremiah. Here to stay. 303 00:26:11,069 --> 00:26:13,946 Yeah, man, come on. Let's go bust him out, yeah. 304 00:26:14,155 --> 00:26:15,990 No, man. We can't just waltz in there. 305 00:26:16,366 --> 00:26:17,950 We gotta figure out a plan, man. 306 00:26:23,999 --> 00:26:25,708 The eagle's landed, you guys. 307 00:26:32,382 --> 00:26:35,801 You kids know where Phillip McNutly's office is? 308 00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:41,807 - Uh, you ordered a pizza? - What's the damage, young man? 309 00:26:42,225 --> 00:26:43,934 Ten even. 310 00:26:45,186 --> 00:26:46,645 Oh. 311 00:26:50,275 --> 00:26:53,861 If he offers you a slice, you're not the least bit hungry. 312 00:26:55,363 --> 00:26:59,366 Ten dollars, and I'm donating your tip to the church. 313 00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:03,037 - The Lord thanks you. - Tell the big guy not to mention it. 314 00:27:03,246 --> 00:27:04,788 I am famished. 315 00:27:05,206 --> 00:27:08,000 Well, I hope you brought a lunch for yourself. 316 00:27:08,168 --> 00:27:10,711 Uh, no, but I'm not hungry anyway. 317 00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:12,755 Oh, it finally speaks. 318 00:27:12,964 --> 00:27:15,716 Well, there's one barrier we've broken through, huh? 319 00:27:20,138 --> 00:27:23,390 Mm. Mm. Oh. 320 00:27:23,933 --> 00:27:25,351 Your coming here reminds me... 321 00:27:25,602 --> 00:27:28,312 ...of the gospel parable of the prodigal son. 322 00:27:28,772 --> 00:27:30,689 Once, there was a man... 323 00:27:30,899 --> 00:27:32,191 ...and he had two sons. 324 00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:35,319 And they both grew up on the farm with him. 325 00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:37,780 Um, one day... 326 00:27:51,753 --> 00:27:53,337 Ah. 327 00:27:54,839 --> 00:27:55,923 Oh. 328 00:27:56,716 --> 00:27:59,760 That was a very stale mushroom. 329 00:28:00,178 --> 00:28:02,846 Well, where was I? 330 00:28:03,348 --> 00:28:05,474 Man, come on, this is such a lousy view. 331 00:28:05,684 --> 00:28:08,310 How the hell are we ever supposed to know when he's lit? 332 00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:11,313 It usually takes 10 minutes to half an hour. 333 00:28:11,523 --> 00:28:12,648 All depends, you know? 334 00:28:18,279 --> 00:28:20,447 He's lit. 335 00:28:26,037 --> 00:28:29,373 I've been telling that sermon for years. 336 00:28:29,582 --> 00:28:31,583 This is the first time I've realized... 337 00:28:32,043 --> 00:28:35,546 ...it's the work of some comedy mastermind. 338 00:28:36,005 --> 00:28:40,384 The prodigal son is a barrel of fucking monkeys. 339 00:28:40,593 --> 00:28:43,470 Wait, wait, wait! You kids can't go in there. 340 00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:46,974 No, no, no, it's okay. We're old buds of Father McNulty's. 341 00:28:47,183 --> 00:28:48,434 How's it hanging, Padre? 342 00:28:48,643 --> 00:28:52,062 Whoa, I just heard you talking through my nose. 343 00:28:52,772 --> 00:28:55,941 Is it possible my nose has eardrums? 344 00:28:56,234 --> 00:28:57,526 Nosedrums. Ha-ha-ha. 345 00:28:57,736 --> 00:29:01,530 Yeah. We're here to take our friend Jam here... 346 00:29:01,740 --> 00:29:05,868 ...to the big satanic Kiss concert tonight if that's okay with you? 347 00:29:06,244 --> 00:29:08,912 Satan? Satan? Santa. 348 00:29:09,122 --> 00:29:13,792 Hey. Whoa, they're the same letters. They're the same guy. 349 00:29:14,210 --> 00:29:15,836 It's the same frigging guy. 350 00:29:16,045 --> 00:29:19,047 Hey, what the hell are you doing, Sister Gonorrhea? 351 00:29:19,257 --> 00:29:20,883 Waiting for a bus? Ha-ha-ha. 352 00:29:46,409 --> 00:29:49,286 You'll still get rowdy with the girls and boys 353 00:29:49,496 --> 00:29:53,081 'Cause it's time for you To take a stand, yeah, yeah 354 00:29:53,291 --> 00:29:55,000 Yeah, ooh 355 00:29:55,210 --> 00:29:57,836 Shout it, shout it 356 00:29:58,046 --> 00:29:59,880 Shout it out loud 357 00:30:00,089 --> 00:30:02,132 Yeah You want a little party 358 00:30:02,342 --> 00:30:05,302 Shout it, shout it 359 00:30:05,512 --> 00:30:07,471 Shout it out loud 360 00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,390 Whoa, dudes, man. 361 00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:13,227 I just had the killerest vision, man. 362 00:30:13,436 --> 00:30:17,689 Imagine Mystery opening up for Kiss, man. 363 00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:20,567 - Oh, that'd be fucking it. - Yeah, man. 364 00:30:20,777 --> 00:30:22,861 It could happen, man. It could happen. 365 00:30:23,071 --> 00:30:27,157 You know, in '73, Kiss was opening for Blue Öyster Cult. 366 00:30:27,659 --> 00:30:29,535 One year later to the day, man... 367 00:30:30,245 --> 00:30:32,287 ...Blue Öyster Cult was opening for Kiss. 368 00:30:32,497 --> 00:30:36,291 We're not gonna be opening for anybody until our singer gets over his stage fright. 369 00:30:36,501 --> 00:30:37,709 - God, man. - Ha, ha. 370 00:30:37,919 --> 00:30:39,753 I don't have fucking stage fright, Lex. 371 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:43,590 Yeah, then why'd you pass out on-stage at Bing's party before the first song? 372 00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:45,801 That was one show, man. 373 00:30:46,010 --> 00:30:48,637 That was our only show, and you dropped like a dead deer on us. 374 00:30:48,805 --> 00:30:50,347 Ha-ha-ha. - Shut up. 375 00:30:53,977 --> 00:30:55,519 I'm solid gold 376 00:30:55,728 --> 00:30:57,271 I've got the goods 377 00:30:57,480 --> 00:31:00,983 They stand when I walk Through the neighborhoods 378 00:31:01,192 --> 00:31:03,110 I'm makin' it 379 00:31:03,319 --> 00:31:07,114 I've got the chance I'm takin' it 380 00:31:07,323 --> 00:31:08,740 No more, no more 381 00:31:08,950 --> 00:31:10,617 Fakin' it 382 00:31:10,827 --> 00:31:14,454 This time in life I'm makin' it 383 00:31:16,416 --> 00:31:17,916 Makin' it 384 00:31:19,419 --> 00:31:20,752 Give me this pizza. 385 00:31:22,630 --> 00:31:25,090 - Come on, it's the last piece, man. - Mine, all right? 386 00:31:27,677 --> 00:31:30,554 Fuck, man. Only a car full of Stellas and Guidos... 387 00:31:30,763 --> 00:31:33,265 ...would ride your ass on a two-lane highway and honk. 388 00:31:33,766 --> 00:31:35,225 Oh, man. 389 00:31:35,435 --> 00:31:38,854 Listen everyone here 390 00:31:39,063 --> 00:31:42,024 This coming year's gonna be my year 391 00:31:42,233 --> 00:31:43,734 I'm as bad as they come 392 00:31:43,943 --> 00:31:45,527 Number two to no one 393 00:31:45,737 --> 00:31:47,446 I've got looks I've got brains 394 00:31:47,655 --> 00:31:49,907 And I'm breakin' these chains 395 00:31:50,116 --> 00:31:54,703 Throw that shit out before it stains the up... Man, get... Throw it out of the car, you asshole. 396 00:31:55,121 --> 00:31:57,205 Come on, man. 397 00:31:57,874 --> 00:31:59,625 I'm makin' it 398 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,714 - Oh, fuck, man. - Oh, man. 399 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:08,300 Kenny, you asshole, you just killed a bird. 400 00:32:08,509 --> 00:32:12,179 That's no bird. That's a hunk of fucking cheese, Kenny. 401 00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:14,348 A hunk of fucking cheese? 402 00:32:14,891 --> 00:32:16,808 We just pissed off the Incredible Hulk... 403 00:32:17,018 --> 00:32:19,937 ...his idiot half-brother and his two circus clowns. 404 00:32:20,146 --> 00:32:22,356 I'm gonna fucking kill these bastards. Know that? 405 00:32:27,070 --> 00:32:28,487 Pull the fucking car over! 406 00:32:30,031 --> 00:32:32,699 - I'm gonna fucking... Pull over. - No way, man. 407 00:32:32,909 --> 00:32:35,869 - You're dead! - Suck my cock! 408 00:32:36,079 --> 00:32:37,788 Maybe we should pull over and apologize. 409 00:32:37,997 --> 00:32:39,790 This motherfucker's dead. 410 00:32:44,045 --> 00:32:45,212 The paint. 411 00:32:46,673 --> 00:32:48,340 Fuck. 412 00:32:49,509 --> 00:32:51,385 Pull over. 413 00:33:05,108 --> 00:33:08,443 - Out of the car. Let's go. - Oh, fuck. 414 00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:15,742 - Oh, shit. God... Oh, God. - Kenny. 415 00:33:15,952 --> 00:33:17,077 No! 416 00:33:17,286 --> 00:33:20,706 - Oh, God. Oh, shit. - Kenny. 417 00:33:20,915 --> 00:33:24,793 - Shit. Shit. Oh, God. - That's not funny, Kenny. 418 00:33:29,007 --> 00:33:31,633 - Kenny. - That's not very nice, man. 419 00:33:31,801 --> 00:33:33,510 You're a complete asshole, Kenny. 420 00:33:36,097 --> 00:33:37,723 Oh, no. 421 00:33:39,142 --> 00:33:41,685 Not the fag music. Get out of the way. 422 00:33:41,894 --> 00:33:44,062 Kenny, would you cut it with the macho crap? 423 00:33:44,272 --> 00:33:47,357 Whoa, whoa, this is about pizza, man. 424 00:33:47,817 --> 00:33:49,735 Can we try and leave Kiss out of it? 425 00:33:50,945 --> 00:33:54,740 What, a bunch of guys who make bad music... 426 00:33:54,949 --> 00:33:58,493 ...dress like freaks and wear more makeup than all my sisters combined? 427 00:33:58,703 --> 00:34:01,913 No. These assholes gotta be stopped. 428 00:34:04,333 --> 00:34:07,711 - That's it. I'm leaving. - Oh! 429 00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:09,838 Christine. 430 00:34:10,214 --> 00:34:11,798 Jesus. 431 00:34:12,008 --> 00:34:14,593 Christine. You googatz in the head or something? 432 00:34:14,802 --> 00:34:17,137 We are on the side of the freaking highway. 433 00:34:17,597 --> 00:34:18,847 - Fuck her. - Fuck her. 434 00:34:19,057 --> 00:34:21,808 - Kool and the Gang, now, that's music. - Now, that's music. 435 00:34:22,018 --> 00:34:24,978 - But this? This is crap. - That's crap. 436 00:34:36,449 --> 00:34:39,743 All right, fag-mo, have you learned your lesson yet, puke? 437 00:34:41,621 --> 00:34:46,208 Well, if the lesson is that you're a dick with ears... 438 00:34:46,417 --> 00:34:50,295 ...and a really bad haircut, I'd say, yeah, I learned my lesson. 439 00:34:51,589 --> 00:34:54,341 - Break his fucking legs, Kenny. - Fucking... 440 00:35:25,748 --> 00:35:29,209 Come on, we can talk about this, right? Heh. 441 00:35:29,418 --> 00:35:31,628 You know, maybe reason a little bit. 442 00:35:37,552 --> 00:35:39,845 When these guys wake up, they'll come look for you. 443 00:35:40,054 --> 00:35:44,015 You best hope they don't find you because if they do, they're gonna kick your asses. 444 00:35:44,225 --> 00:35:48,145 Oh, yeah, Stella. And we'll deserve it too, won't we? 445 00:35:48,354 --> 00:35:52,315 But you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna make it really worth their while. 446 00:35:57,446 --> 00:35:58,864 Oh, God! 447 00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:03,827 - Yeah! - You freak! 448 00:36:04,036 --> 00:36:06,079 - God! - Yeah! 449 00:36:06,289 --> 00:36:07,539 Die, you fucking freak! 450 00:36:07,748 --> 00:36:09,666 Thanks for letting us use your makeup. 451 00:36:09,876 --> 00:36:14,379 You must have the entire Revlon factory in your purse, you greasy disco ball. 452 00:36:14,589 --> 00:36:15,755 - Let's go! - Very funny. 453 00:36:15,965 --> 00:36:17,966 I hope you fucking choke to death and die... 454 00:36:18,176 --> 00:36:20,260 ...you loser-ass motherfuckers! - Disco sucks! 455 00:36:20,469 --> 00:36:22,596 Fuck you! 456 00:36:22,805 --> 00:36:24,681 Fuck! Fuck! 457 00:36:26,767 --> 00:36:29,936 - Hey, they put the fag makeup on you. - I got the fag makeup on? 458 00:36:30,146 --> 00:36:32,814 The fucking fag makeup's on you. 459 00:36:34,483 --> 00:36:37,652 - Oh, no. I got fag makeup on me. - Oh, gee. 460 00:36:37,862 --> 00:36:40,780 - Yeah! - Whoo! Whoo! 461 00:36:40,990 --> 00:36:42,073 Yeah! 462 00:36:50,791 --> 00:36:52,667 Hey, look, it's that girl. 463 00:36:52,877 --> 00:36:55,420 Man, that's no girl. That's a Stella. 464 00:36:56,339 --> 00:36:59,758 Yeah, well, Stella or no Stella, we should pull over and help her out. 465 00:37:00,426 --> 00:37:02,135 Fucking inbred oaf. 466 00:37:02,345 --> 00:37:07,057 Kenny, fuck him. Fuck you. Fucking kick your ass. 467 00:37:07,266 --> 00:37:08,975 Man, what the hell is wrong with you? 468 00:37:09,185 --> 00:37:11,353 You got a thing for that thing? 469 00:37:11,562 --> 00:37:14,314 It's a teenage girl walking along the side of the highway. 470 00:37:15,233 --> 00:37:18,985 I mean, they make scary movies that start out like that. 471 00:37:19,195 --> 00:37:23,323 Hey, but they make porno movies that start out like that too, man. 472 00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:26,076 Yeah. 473 00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:46,763 Oh, great. Just hitched a ride with a bunch of potheads. 474 00:37:48,140 --> 00:37:50,392 I'm trying to hook up with people at this place... 475 00:37:50,601 --> 00:37:54,229 ...in downtown Detroit called Disco Inferno. You mind dropping me there? 476 00:37:54,438 --> 00:37:55,939 What's it worth to you? 477 00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:58,108 - What the hell is that supposed to mean? - Ha, ha. 478 00:37:58,317 --> 00:38:00,610 It doesn't mean anything. Don't pay attention to him. 479 00:38:00,820 --> 00:38:02,904 It's more like Disco's Infernal. 480 00:38:03,114 --> 00:38:04,656 Oh, you hot baby, you. 481 00:38:05,199 --> 00:38:10,412 You know, your clothes may say disco, but your eyes say rock 'n' roll. 482 00:38:11,163 --> 00:38:15,041 Yeah? Well, your belt buckle may say rock 'n' roll... 483 00:38:15,501 --> 00:38:18,044 ...but your breath says pepperoni, baby. 484 00:38:20,631 --> 00:38:22,507 So are you gonna suck our dicks or what? 485 00:38:22,883 --> 00:38:25,051 - What? - Trip, that's so fucking rude, man. 486 00:38:25,261 --> 00:38:29,222 Fuck you, Jam. Stop being the wussy sensitive guy just to impress her, man. 487 00:38:29,432 --> 00:38:31,725 She's obviously not gonna put out, man. 488 00:38:32,059 --> 00:38:34,227 She's a tease, man. 489 00:38:34,437 --> 00:38:37,647 A tease? What the hell did I do to tease you Mongoloids? 490 00:38:37,857 --> 00:38:39,065 You got in the fucking car. 491 00:38:39,275 --> 00:38:43,361 Oh, God, how calculating of me to lead you on like that after you offered me a ride. 492 00:38:43,946 --> 00:38:45,238 Whatever, Stella. 493 00:38:45,448 --> 00:38:46,865 My name's Christine. 494 00:38:47,074 --> 00:38:50,285 Not Stella. You don't have to be pigs because I prefer Donna Summer... 495 00:38:50,494 --> 00:38:53,663 ...or KC and the Sunshine Band or the Village People over Kiss. 496 00:38:53,873 --> 00:38:54,873 - Oh, no. - Ha, ha. 497 00:38:55,082 --> 00:38:57,250 Fucking Village People. Man, they're a fag band. 498 00:38:57,460 --> 00:39:01,296 - They take it up the coat. - All right, all right, guys. All right. 499 00:39:01,505 --> 00:39:03,965 You know, thanks, but I can take care of myself, germ. 500 00:39:04,800 --> 00:39:06,676 - Jam. - Whatever. 501 00:39:07,636 --> 00:39:09,596 Dope burnout, let's get one thing straight: 502 00:39:09,805 --> 00:39:12,265 As far as I'm concerned, good tunes is good tunes. 503 00:39:12,475 --> 00:39:16,770 Be it disco or rock or polka or whatever have you, regardless of the category. 504 00:39:16,979 --> 00:39:19,230 I mean, disco is just easier to dance to. 505 00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:22,650 You call that Deney Terrio, John Travolta shit dancing? 506 00:39:22,860 --> 00:39:23,943 Hey, you know something? 507 00:39:24,153 --> 00:39:26,863 Disco's so fucking big right now I wouldn't be surprised... 508 00:39:27,073 --> 00:39:28,990 - ...if Kiss did a disco song someday. - What? 509 00:39:29,158 --> 00:39:31,409 - Yeah. - If there's one thing Kiss will never do... 510 00:39:31,619 --> 00:39:34,120 ...it's a bullshit disco song. - No shit, man. 511 00:39:34,330 --> 00:39:38,291 Yeah, man. Disco blows dogs for quarters, man. Heh. 512 00:39:38,501 --> 00:39:41,503 That's an intelligently biting remark wrought with wit and irony. 513 00:39:41,712 --> 00:39:44,172 If you don't like that one, you'll think it's funny... 514 00:39:44,382 --> 00:39:46,883 ...when we kick your fucking ass out of the car. 515 00:39:47,093 --> 00:39:49,052 Why not put your money where your mouth is? 516 00:39:49,261 --> 00:39:51,763 - Why don't you lick my hairy crack? Ha-ha-ha. 517 00:39:51,972 --> 00:39:55,100 Why don't you bend over? You're looking right at it. 518 00:39:56,310 --> 00:39:58,019 What? 519 00:39:58,229 --> 00:40:01,773 That last remark fell about 30 yards away from making any sense whatsoever. 520 00:40:03,651 --> 00:40:06,820 You're right. "Bend over, you're looking right at it"? 521 00:40:07,029 --> 00:40:09,280 What the hell is that supposed to mean anyway? 522 00:40:11,826 --> 00:40:16,037 Give me... Give me a hit off of that J, will you? That's some kick-ass shit. 523 00:41:07,089 --> 00:41:08,798 Kiss! 524 00:41:09,008 --> 00:41:10,592 Move out of my way! 525 00:41:10,801 --> 00:41:14,137 Lex, thank you for letting us borrow your mom's car, man. 526 00:41:14,472 --> 00:41:16,639 Man, that weed knocked Christine on her ass. 527 00:41:16,849 --> 00:41:18,850 She's sleeping like a baby Stella. 528 00:41:19,059 --> 00:41:21,978 - Man, let's lift up her skirt. - There it is. 529 00:41:22,188 --> 00:41:25,273 - What? - Holy fuck, we made it. 530 00:41:25,691 --> 00:41:27,775 Oh, my God. 531 00:41:30,779 --> 00:41:32,238 Oh, my God. Thank you. 532 00:41:37,203 --> 00:41:38,786 Man. 533 00:41:39,830 --> 00:41:42,123 - Hey! - I'm going into swarmo mode. 534 00:41:42,333 --> 00:41:45,752 I'm going into swarmo mode. Oh, shit! 535 00:41:52,259 --> 00:41:54,344 I'm the King of the Night Time World! 536 00:41:56,305 --> 00:42:00,266 Man, this is better than the first time I got to finger a chick, man. 537 00:42:02,853 --> 00:42:05,104 - It's happening, man! - WURP! 538 00:42:05,314 --> 00:42:08,983 - This is so lucky. - We got two hours to spare. 539 00:42:09,485 --> 00:42:12,153 - Check out that parking space, you guys. - Get in there. 540 00:42:12,363 --> 00:42:15,490 Ample time to go to the station and grab our tickets. 541 00:42:15,699 --> 00:42:18,076 You know what, God is smiling down upon us tonight. 542 00:42:18,285 --> 00:42:20,537 That's weird. I figured he'd be pissed as hell at me. 543 00:42:25,209 --> 00:42:26,334 Yeah! 544 00:42:34,051 --> 00:42:35,635 This is so awesome. 545 00:42:35,844 --> 00:42:38,596 - Dude. - I cannot wait, man. I can't wait. 546 00:42:38,806 --> 00:42:41,140 - Yeah. - Kiss! 547 00:42:41,350 --> 00:42:43,268 We're gonna go to Kiss! 548 00:42:43,477 --> 00:42:45,937 We're gonna go to Kiss! 549 00:42:46,146 --> 00:42:49,023 - Yeah! - Let's get out of here, man. 550 00:42:49,441 --> 00:42:51,734 - Simple Simon? - Yeah, the one and only. 551 00:42:53,153 --> 00:42:54,988 Hey, you kids are gonna have to hurry up. 552 00:42:55,364 --> 00:42:58,741 - I'm due at Cobo Hall for the warm-up. - We're right behind you, Simon. 553 00:42:58,951 --> 00:43:02,245 We wanna thank you for handing over those tickets to me and my buddies. 554 00:43:02,454 --> 00:43:03,997 Your name isn't Trip, is it? 555 00:43:04,206 --> 00:43:08,042 Oh, no. My name's Trip. Remember? We were talking on the phone? 556 00:43:11,297 --> 00:43:13,172 - Go, caller. - Eugene Klein... 557 00:43:13,382 --> 00:43:17,343 ...Stanley Eisen, Peter Criscuola, and Paul Frehley. 558 00:43:17,553 --> 00:43:21,973 You just got yourself four tickets and four backstage passes to Kiss... 559 00:43:22,182 --> 00:43:25,435 ...live at Cobo Hall tonight! We won! Aah! 560 00:43:25,644 --> 00:43:28,438 Stay on the line so we can get your full name, information and... 561 00:43:29,773 --> 00:43:31,774 Trip? Man, you didn't hang up on me, did you, Trip? 562 00:43:31,942 --> 00:43:35,903 What kind of total moron would hang up after winning Kiss tickets? 563 00:43:36,113 --> 00:43:38,197 Well, there you have it. 564 00:43:38,407 --> 00:43:42,910 We had no choice. We had to give the tickets to the next caller. I'm sorry. 565 00:43:50,919 --> 00:43:53,546 - Whoa, whoa, hey, relax! - I hate you! 566 00:43:53,756 --> 00:43:55,089 I'll kill you! 567 00:44:09,271 --> 00:44:13,608 This noise machine is more than just a quartet of lousy musicians. 568 00:44:13,817 --> 00:44:16,903 Now there's a woman who totally abuses her privilege of motherhood. 569 00:44:17,237 --> 00:44:19,656 - What is Kiss backwards? - Sick! 570 00:44:22,076 --> 00:44:24,994 Oh, shit. Guys, where's the Volvo? 571 00:44:25,996 --> 00:44:29,290 - It was fucking stolen, man. - Christine stole it. 572 00:44:29,708 --> 00:44:32,210 Asleep, my ass. Stella booted with your mom's wheels. 573 00:44:32,419 --> 00:44:34,712 Son of a bitch, man. How could this happen? 574 00:44:34,922 --> 00:44:37,048 - Heh, heh. - Why are you laughing? 575 00:44:37,257 --> 00:44:39,467 I'm starting to get real mad. Jam, you ass. 576 00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:42,053 Why'd you talk us into picking up this bitch? 577 00:44:42,471 --> 00:44:46,099 - I'm sorry, man. I was trying to be nice... - I'm sick of your nice shit. 578 00:44:46,308 --> 00:44:48,643 Drummers are supposed to have some fucking balls. 579 00:44:48,852 --> 00:44:52,772 I was being conscientious. I didn't think she was gonna steal his mom's car. 580 00:44:52,981 --> 00:44:56,567 Jam, just shut your faggoty-ass mouth, okay? 581 00:44:56,777 --> 00:44:57,944 You're pissing me off. 582 00:44:58,362 --> 00:44:59,946 Now, we came all this way... 583 00:45:00,155 --> 00:45:02,073 ...we got an hour and 45 minutes... 584 00:45:02,282 --> 00:45:05,326 ...and we got absolutely nothing. 585 00:45:05,536 --> 00:45:09,247 And so help me, God, we are going to that concert. 586 00:45:09,748 --> 00:45:12,667 We must get the cops in on this Volvo situation. 587 00:45:12,876 --> 00:45:14,919 Lex, this is Detroit. 588 00:45:15,129 --> 00:45:18,381 You think the cops are gonna waste city dollars on a Swedish car? 589 00:45:19,717 --> 00:45:22,301 You're right. I mean, my mom's got insurance. 590 00:45:22,511 --> 00:45:23,845 - Why am I freaking out? - Yeah. 591 00:45:24,054 --> 00:45:27,056 It's cool. She's gonna try to ground me. I don't give a shit, man. 592 00:45:27,266 --> 00:45:28,558 Exactly. Cool, bro. 593 00:45:28,767 --> 00:45:31,394 Oh, shit! Man, I'm in big trouble. 594 00:45:31,603 --> 00:45:34,021 I'm in big fucking trouble! The car's gone, man! 595 00:45:34,231 --> 00:45:37,316 Shut the fuck up, man. We're trying to think. 596 00:45:37,526 --> 00:45:38,818 Wait a second, man. 597 00:45:39,027 --> 00:45:41,237 I know how we can get the fucking tickets, man. 598 00:45:41,447 --> 00:45:44,365 We'll beat the fucking shit out of four little kids or something. 599 00:45:44,575 --> 00:45:47,410 - Like, take their fucking tickets. - Brilliance, Trip. 600 00:45:47,619 --> 00:45:48,745 Sheer fucking brilliance. 601 00:45:48,954 --> 00:45:53,833 Why don't you give Albert Einstein here the fucking Nobel Prize? 602 00:45:56,295 --> 00:45:58,337 Look, I think I can barter with a scalper. 603 00:45:58,547 --> 00:46:00,923 If you guys can think of a better plan, go for it. 604 00:46:01,133 --> 00:46:03,843 For the next hour and a half, it's every dude for himself. 605 00:46:04,052 --> 00:46:07,346 We'll reconvene at that intersection at 8:45. 606 00:46:08,056 --> 00:46:12,852 - I'll see you guys later. Good luck. - I don't know what the fuck we're doing. 607 00:46:14,772 --> 00:46:17,273 Look around you tonight, mothers. 608 00:46:17,483 --> 00:46:20,443 Look at all the young faces. 609 00:46:20,652 --> 00:46:23,404 Oh, they smile and they laugh... 610 00:46:23,614 --> 00:46:25,865 ...but their eyes have lost all hope. 611 00:46:26,074 --> 00:46:31,537 This satanic group Kiss has stolen their souls. 612 00:46:31,747 --> 00:46:33,331 We... 613 00:46:35,501 --> 00:46:36,834 Shit. 614 00:46:43,884 --> 00:46:47,887 I do not know how you got here tonight, and I do not want to know. 615 00:46:48,096 --> 00:46:53,184 All I know is you are going to pay dearly for this one, young man. 616 00:47:15,082 --> 00:47:16,123 Oh, my God. 617 00:47:16,333 --> 00:47:19,001 The mass, Father, so inspirational. Father, thank you. 618 00:47:19,211 --> 00:47:21,671 - Thank you. Come again next week. - Father. 619 00:47:22,047 --> 00:47:23,339 It's Jeremiah. 620 00:47:23,549 --> 00:47:24,799 I'm desperate. 621 00:47:25,008 --> 00:47:27,009 My son was about to defy God... 622 00:47:27,219 --> 00:47:29,262 ...by going to that blasphemous Kiss concert. 623 00:47:29,471 --> 00:47:32,098 In that case, come right in. 624 00:47:32,558 --> 00:47:35,268 He and his mom just went into that church. 625 00:47:36,103 --> 00:47:37,603 Can I go and say goodbye to him? 626 00:47:37,813 --> 00:47:41,732 Beth, I am not gonna let you wander the streets of Detroit after dark. 627 00:47:42,401 --> 00:47:45,611 I'm not going to wander. I'm just gonna go over there. 628 00:47:45,988 --> 00:47:49,740 - Fine. As long as we know where you are. - Thank you. 629 00:47:50,117 --> 00:47:52,743 Don't be too long. We need to be getting back on the road. 630 00:47:52,953 --> 00:47:55,454 - Stuart. - Just relax. 631 00:47:55,664 --> 00:47:58,791 She's probably got a crush on the kid or something. 632 00:48:07,342 --> 00:48:12,179 Hey, chief, need a ticket? Second row, center, but it's 75 clams. 633 00:48:12,556 --> 00:48:15,600 Oh, man, this is all I got. Look. 634 00:48:16,518 --> 00:48:19,395 Well, man, scare up the extra gravy, brother, take it easy. 635 00:48:19,605 --> 00:48:23,691 Wait a minute, where am I supposed to find that kind of money in an hour, man? 636 00:48:24,693 --> 00:48:28,988 Well, um, check it out over there. There's a little contest going on. 637 00:48:29,197 --> 00:48:32,033 Take off your pants, shake your wee wee, get a hundred bucks. 638 00:48:32,367 --> 00:48:35,912 I can't take off my clothes and go in there and dance like that, man. 639 00:48:36,121 --> 00:48:38,748 I mean, that's embarrassing, man. 640 00:48:40,292 --> 00:48:44,128 Check it out. The question you gotta ask yourself is how badly do you want to see... 641 00:48:44,338 --> 00:48:47,590 ...the greatest fucking rock 'n' roll show on the fucking Earth, right? 642 00:48:47,799 --> 00:48:50,551 You're talking Gene and Paul live, y'all. 643 00:48:50,761 --> 00:48:53,179 I'm talking about voluptuous women in the audience. 644 00:48:53,388 --> 00:48:56,515 I'm talking big breastises in tight vestises, my friend. 645 00:48:56,892 --> 00:48:59,268 You're talking people passing around joints. 646 00:48:59,478 --> 00:49:02,563 You're talking about fucking Detroit Rock City, brother. 647 00:49:02,773 --> 00:49:04,190 Shake your wee wee. 648 00:49:05,150 --> 00:49:09,111 I got stage fright. And they're playing fucking disco over there. 649 00:49:09,321 --> 00:49:12,615 Shit or get off the pot, rock star. You want to dance? 650 00:49:12,824 --> 00:49:15,826 Or you wanna see Kiss on album covers for the rest of your life? 651 00:49:18,163 --> 00:49:19,163 Mm. 652 00:49:19,373 --> 00:49:21,749 Second row, center, brother. Go shake your wee wee. 653 00:49:21,959 --> 00:49:24,418 - You're gonna have that ticket for me, right? - Oh, yeah, man. 654 00:49:24,628 --> 00:49:28,589 You got my, uh... You got my solemn oath as a... As a public servant. 655 00:49:32,094 --> 00:49:33,886 Go for it, brother. 656 00:49:34,638 --> 00:49:36,097 All right. 657 00:49:36,306 --> 00:49:37,932 See you around. 658 00:49:43,146 --> 00:49:47,024 Hey, chief, you need a ticket? Seventy-five bucks, second row, center. 659 00:49:47,234 --> 00:49:50,569 No, man, I'm gonna beat my ticket out of some poor defenseless chump. 660 00:49:50,779 --> 00:49:51,988 You know what I mean? 661 00:49:52,197 --> 00:49:53,781 - Yeah, whatever, reefer-head. - Yeah. 662 00:49:53,991 --> 00:49:55,908 You fucking burnout. 663 00:50:14,094 --> 00:50:17,596 'Cause baby I believe that you're a star 664 00:50:18,473 --> 00:50:21,809 Everyone's a winner, baby That's the truth 665 00:50:22,936 --> 00:50:25,479 Making love to you is such a thrill 666 00:50:25,647 --> 00:50:29,817 Whoo! Yeah! Take it off, honey! Whoo-hoo! 667 00:50:29,985 --> 00:50:31,986 Everyone's a winner, baby That's no lie 668 00:50:32,154 --> 00:50:35,239 You never fail to satisfy 669 00:50:44,041 --> 00:50:45,791 - Give me. - Ah! Ah! 670 00:50:47,878 --> 00:50:49,628 Don't do that. 671 00:50:55,302 --> 00:50:57,219 I need to sign up for the contest, please. 672 00:50:57,846 --> 00:51:01,015 You're scrawny but thanks to the concert we're low on amateurs. Name? 673 00:51:01,433 --> 00:51:03,350 - Hawk. - Pick a song, Hawk. 674 00:51:03,935 --> 00:51:05,061 You got any Kiss? 675 00:51:05,270 --> 00:51:07,104 Doubtful. Drink? 676 00:51:07,314 --> 00:51:08,397 Yeah. A man's drink. 677 00:51:12,944 --> 00:51:14,653 Oh, God. 678 00:51:17,407 --> 00:51:18,407 What's this? 679 00:51:18,617 --> 00:51:20,868 You've never seen a bourbon on the rocks before? 680 00:51:21,661 --> 00:51:22,661 Oh. 681 00:51:22,871 --> 00:51:24,330 Save your money, stud muffin. 682 00:51:24,539 --> 00:51:27,666 Lady at the end of the bar sends her love. 683 00:51:37,177 --> 00:51:39,470 Oh, shit. 684 00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:42,056 Wow. 685 00:51:42,265 --> 00:51:43,891 Cheers? 686 00:51:49,773 --> 00:51:51,190 Aah! God! 687 00:51:54,027 --> 00:51:55,569 It's gone bad. 688 00:52:12,504 --> 00:52:13,671 Hey, you little twerps. 689 00:52:13,880 --> 00:52:16,632 Give me your Kiss tickets or I'll pop your faces in. 690 00:52:16,842 --> 00:52:20,219 - But we don't have any Kiss tickets. - Yeah. Kiss sucks. 691 00:52:20,428 --> 00:52:22,888 What? I ought to kick your asses for saying that. 692 00:52:23,098 --> 00:52:25,516 Give me this instead. Now, scram. Get out of here. 693 00:52:32,607 --> 00:52:33,607 Cool. 694 00:52:43,493 --> 00:52:45,244 Simple Simon coming at you. 695 00:52:45,620 --> 00:52:49,331 It's 30 minutes and counting until Kiss hits the stage tonight... 696 00:52:49,541 --> 00:52:51,500 ...at Detroit's very own Cobo Hall. 697 00:52:51,710 --> 00:52:55,296 But until then, here they are with "Shock Me." 698 00:52:55,505 --> 00:52:57,965 Rock on, Ace! 699 00:53:22,824 --> 00:53:24,491 Hey, little kid. 700 00:53:24,701 --> 00:53:28,287 - Shit. You just stumped my last ball... - Scream and I'll kick your head off. 701 00:53:28,496 --> 00:53:31,123 Okay, booger, your Kiss ticket or your life. 702 00:53:31,333 --> 00:53:33,000 Please, sir, don't beat me up. 703 00:53:33,210 --> 00:53:35,461 I do have a Kiss ticket, but not on me. 704 00:53:35,670 --> 00:53:38,756 Oh, likely story. Now, hand it over, punk. 705 00:53:38,965 --> 00:53:42,259 No, really. My brother's hanging on to it for safekeeping. 706 00:53:42,469 --> 00:53:44,470 Please, let me get him for you. 707 00:53:44,679 --> 00:53:46,305 Hey, Chongo. 708 00:53:58,235 --> 00:53:59,568 Look, little kid... 709 00:53:59,778 --> 00:54:03,447 ...I don't need to see Kiss that bad. - Don't try to run, you maggot. 710 00:54:03,657 --> 00:54:06,116 Chongo's an all-state track star in every event. 711 00:54:16,544 --> 00:54:17,711 Lookit, man... 712 00:54:17,921 --> 00:54:21,257 ...you can have my wallet, okay? - I was gonna take your wallet anyway... 713 00:54:21,466 --> 00:54:25,844 ...after Chongo and his friends crush your ribcage like a pack of Luckys, punk. 714 00:54:26,221 --> 00:54:30,349 - This fairy giving you shit, bro? - He was gonna mug me for my Kiss tickets. 715 00:54:30,558 --> 00:54:31,767 That's nuts. 716 00:54:31,977 --> 00:54:37,231 Heh. I said, "Hey, little kid, you know where I could take a piss?" 717 00:54:42,570 --> 00:54:46,282 Okay, pimple dick, you have the option of walking outside or getting dragged out. 718 00:54:46,491 --> 00:54:47,825 Please, sir... 719 00:54:48,034 --> 00:54:49,743 ...don't kick my ass. 720 00:54:49,953 --> 00:54:53,205 I'll do anything to get out of a beating. 721 00:54:53,748 --> 00:54:55,541 Say, Chongo... 722 00:54:55,750 --> 00:54:59,962 ...perhaps we could use some extra cash for tasty snacks at the Kiss concert... 723 00:55:00,171 --> 00:55:02,673 ...our weaselly friend won't be attending. 724 00:55:13,727 --> 00:55:15,936 Hey, move those lights over there. 725 00:55:33,496 --> 00:55:36,123 - Hey, you. - Man. 726 00:55:36,499 --> 00:55:37,541 Hey, come back here! 727 00:55:39,919 --> 00:55:41,253 Shit. 728 00:55:42,589 --> 00:55:44,089 Come here. 729 00:55:49,137 --> 00:55:52,723 All right, wise guy. You are so out of here. 730 00:55:52,932 --> 00:55:56,185 Fuck. Hey, keep your paws to yourself, you dumb fucking ape. 731 00:55:56,394 --> 00:55:59,021 Where'd he go? Did you see him? 732 00:56:03,485 --> 00:56:08,072 It's been a while since my boy had holy confession. 733 00:56:08,281 --> 00:56:10,574 - Could you please...? - Consider it done. 734 00:56:10,784 --> 00:56:12,284 Oh. 735 00:56:32,305 --> 00:56:37,142 It is about time that you gave up that stupid dream of yours once and for all. 736 00:56:37,352 --> 00:56:40,646 No son of mine is gonna be a career musician... 737 00:56:40,855 --> 00:56:42,189 ...ever, ever, ever! 738 00:56:42,399 --> 00:56:44,274 - Madam, madam. - Shh. 739 00:56:44,484 --> 00:56:45,943 We are in a cathedral. 740 00:56:46,152 --> 00:56:49,822 - I'll walk you out. - Sorry. I'm sorry. 741 00:56:55,662 --> 00:56:57,830 Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. 742 00:56:58,039 --> 00:57:04,378 This is my first confession in a really long time. 743 00:57:13,847 --> 00:57:17,724 That was our Viking, Patrick Hirsch, and he's hung like a Norse. 744 00:57:17,934 --> 00:57:21,645 Our next amateur has a name like a bird, and if you like birds, you'll like this: 745 00:57:21,855 --> 00:57:23,313 - It's just a swallow. - Aw! 746 00:57:23,523 --> 00:57:26,150 So put your hands together, make him feel at home... 747 00:57:26,359 --> 00:57:29,236 ...and please welcome Hawk. 748 00:57:32,073 --> 00:57:34,158 Oh, shit. 749 00:57:34,576 --> 00:57:36,243 No, no, no. 750 00:57:36,453 --> 00:57:39,413 - No way, man. - You're not gonna chicken out now, are you? 751 00:57:41,082 --> 00:57:43,125 You're right, Dicky. 752 00:57:43,960 --> 00:57:46,003 You're right, man. 753 00:57:46,296 --> 00:57:50,466 Shit. What am I saying? I gotta do this. It's for Kiss. 754 00:58:04,898 --> 00:58:05,898 Ow. 755 00:59:18,304 --> 00:59:20,556 Oh, my God. 756 00:59:52,880 --> 00:59:54,715 The stink. 757 00:59:56,050 --> 00:59:57,050 Maestro. 758 01:00:17,322 --> 01:00:21,450 I know a thing or two about her 759 01:00:24,287 --> 01:00:29,875 I know she'll only make you cry 760 01:00:31,669 --> 01:00:34,004 Everybody says she's looking good 761 01:00:35,465 --> 01:00:38,008 And the lady knows it's understood 762 01:00:38,176 --> 01:00:39,801 Strutter 763 01:00:46,517 --> 01:00:50,812 She wears her satins like a lady 764 01:00:53,775 --> 01:00:59,321 She gets her way just like a child 765 01:01:01,199 --> 01:01:07,079 You take her home and she says "Maybe, baby" 766 01:01:08,706 --> 01:01:13,710 She takes you down and drives you wild 767 01:01:15,630 --> 01:01:18,090 Everybody says she's looking good 768 01:01:18,549 --> 01:01:19,549 Whoo! 769 01:01:19,717 --> 01:01:21,051 And the lady knows it's understood 770 01:01:21,219 --> 01:01:22,469 Take it off! 771 01:01:22,637 --> 01:01:24,096 Strutter 772 01:01:24,472 --> 01:01:25,472 Oh. Whoa. 773 01:01:40,780 --> 01:01:41,863 Ow. 774 01:02:01,926 --> 01:02:03,176 Oh, man! Hey! 775 01:02:10,393 --> 01:02:12,185 - Hey! - Man. 776 01:02:12,395 --> 01:02:14,229 Come back, you little punk! 777 01:02:15,356 --> 01:02:16,815 Move! 778 01:02:17,024 --> 01:02:18,984 Hey! 779 01:02:25,241 --> 01:02:27,284 - What are you doing? - Move it! 780 01:02:27,452 --> 01:02:29,828 Get off me, you bitch! 781 01:02:32,081 --> 01:02:34,499 Get up. Come on, move it, sweetie. 782 01:02:34,667 --> 01:02:35,709 Watch it, asshole. 783 01:02:36,043 --> 01:02:39,880 Where is he? Where did he go this time? 784 01:02:42,717 --> 01:02:45,135 - Two hundred bucks? - My time's precious. 785 01:02:45,344 --> 01:02:47,804 That's a reasonable price to pay for your sorry life. 786 01:02:48,014 --> 01:02:50,223 Hold on, man. 787 01:02:51,517 --> 01:02:54,060 Look, I know how I can get the money. 788 01:02:54,270 --> 01:02:56,271 I just figured it out, man. 789 01:02:56,481 --> 01:02:58,899 Oh, yes. 790 01:02:59,609 --> 01:03:01,443 But you might wanna wait outside. 791 01:03:01,652 --> 01:03:04,154 - I don't trust him. - I think he's on the level. 792 01:03:04,363 --> 01:03:06,948 He's too stupid to do anything sneaky anyway. 793 01:03:07,158 --> 01:03:09,534 Look at him. He's a moron. 794 01:03:10,870 --> 01:03:13,497 You got 15 minutes and not a second longer. 795 01:03:13,706 --> 01:03:16,249 Are you sure that you don't wanna talk... 796 01:03:16,459 --> 01:03:22,172 ...about, uh, oh, carnal knowledge with a neighborhood girl? 797 01:03:22,381 --> 01:03:27,010 Or how about finding a box of magazines, huh? 798 01:03:27,220 --> 01:03:29,554 Under your dad's bed? 799 01:03:31,390 --> 01:03:32,641 No. 800 01:03:32,934 --> 01:03:35,811 Well, then I suggest you try to think of something... 801 01:03:36,020 --> 01:03:40,148 ...a little juicier to confess than losing Kiss tickets. 802 01:03:56,624 --> 01:03:57,916 Shh. 803 01:03:59,794 --> 01:04:00,836 Beth? 804 01:04:01,045 --> 01:04:02,754 Shh. 805 01:04:03,422 --> 01:04:06,174 Are you waiting for a confession? I thought you were Jewish. 806 01:04:06,759 --> 01:04:08,426 I have a confession. 807 01:04:21,607 --> 01:04:27,320 - I didn't mean for that to be so, um, intense. - I can take it. 808 01:04:28,948 --> 01:04:31,658 I've been in love with you since the moment I saw you. 809 01:04:31,868 --> 01:04:35,036 I've just always been too scared to show it. 810 01:04:35,413 --> 01:04:38,206 That's exactly the same way I've always felt about you. 811 01:04:38,791 --> 01:04:41,543 - Jeremiah, really? - Really. 812 01:04:42,044 --> 01:04:44,421 And call me Jam. 813 01:04:44,630 --> 01:04:45,839 It's my band name. 814 01:04:48,009 --> 01:04:49,593 Jam. 815 01:04:54,015 --> 01:04:57,559 And now for our grand prize of $100... 816 01:04:57,768 --> 01:04:59,603 Don't worry, ladies, I'm not competing. 817 01:04:59,812 --> 01:05:01,897 If I did, you'd want your money back. 818 01:05:02,106 --> 01:05:03,440 And the winner is: 819 01:05:05,818 --> 01:05:08,236 - Sir Loin! - Yes! Yes! 820 01:05:25,004 --> 01:05:27,505 Hey, don't look so sad. 821 01:05:27,715 --> 01:05:31,635 The night is young and filled with compensatory possibilities. 822 01:05:31,802 --> 01:05:33,470 Oh, heh. 823 01:05:33,721 --> 01:05:38,850 Oh, thanks for the drinks. That was really generous. 824 01:05:39,310 --> 01:05:43,438 There's no reason for me to be around these parts anymore, you know. 825 01:05:43,648 --> 01:05:46,316 I'm in a position to spend some money on you... 826 01:05:46,525 --> 01:05:50,362 ...if you'd get in a position and spend some time on me. 827 01:06:09,173 --> 01:06:11,633 I can't believe you're thinking of robbing this store. 828 01:06:11,842 --> 01:06:15,053 You don't pass GO and collect $200 for pulling stuff like this. 829 01:06:15,262 --> 01:06:19,516 No shit. Is this really worth it? I mean, sure, you're gonna get your ass kicked... 830 01:06:19,725 --> 01:06:22,102 ...nine ways to Sunday by that fucking gorilla... 831 01:06:22,311 --> 01:06:24,771 ...but, I mean, that's still a hundred times better... 832 01:06:24,981 --> 01:06:27,774 ...than getting it porked for the next three to five. 833 01:06:27,984 --> 01:06:29,442 And what about that girl, Trip? 834 01:06:29,652 --> 01:06:31,736 She'll never forget this night. 835 01:06:31,946 --> 01:06:34,948 Even if you get away with it, she'll be scarred for life. 836 01:06:35,157 --> 01:06:37,951 When are you gonna realize that sometimes being tough... 837 01:06:38,160 --> 01:06:39,953 ...means being tender? 838 01:06:40,162 --> 01:06:42,497 All right, everybody, shut up! 839 01:06:53,259 --> 01:06:55,176 Mm-hm. 840 01:06:57,513 --> 01:06:58,972 Gonna have to do this sometime. 841 01:07:07,356 --> 01:07:09,482 Might as well be now. 842 01:07:10,276 --> 01:07:12,402 - Okay. - Evening, honey. 843 01:07:14,155 --> 01:07:17,323 You know what I am, what this is, and what you need to do, so let's do it quick. 844 01:07:17,533 --> 01:07:22,370 Everybody else, kindly introduce yourselves to the floor and kiss it hello. 845 01:07:24,540 --> 01:07:27,917 - Do it or die, bitch. - Please, mister, I'm just a high school kid. 846 01:07:28,461 --> 01:07:30,670 - Aah! - Fuck school. 847 01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:33,965 I just went through the motions till I was old enough to drop out. 848 01:07:34,175 --> 01:07:36,676 And where's all that studying going to get you tonight? 849 01:07:36,886 --> 01:07:40,680 Robbed at gunpoint and possibly shot in the fucking head. 850 01:07:42,683 --> 01:07:45,518 Hey, scumbag, drop it, or I'll blow your head off. 851 01:07:49,065 --> 01:07:50,857 Oh, yeah? 852 01:07:51,067 --> 01:07:52,692 You and what army? 853 01:07:56,405 --> 01:07:57,906 The Kiss Army. 854 01:08:33,442 --> 01:08:34,859 Oh, God, they're in there. 855 01:08:54,171 --> 01:08:56,589 - Oh, shit. - Come on. 856 01:09:12,523 --> 01:09:14,566 Oh, God. God, if you get me out of this... 857 01:09:14,775 --> 01:09:18,111 ...I swear I will never pull my pork again. 858 01:09:19,864 --> 01:09:23,032 - Give me your gun, boy. - No. You give me your gun, boy. 859 01:09:23,242 --> 01:09:25,285 I don't even think you have a gun. 860 01:09:25,494 --> 01:09:26,744 Neither do I. 861 01:09:27,329 --> 01:09:28,913 For the last time... 862 01:09:29,123 --> 01:09:34,210 ...take the piece out, lay back down, or your mom's gonna need Mr. Clean... 863 01:09:34,420 --> 01:09:36,838 ...to get the brains out of your ski cap. 864 01:09:52,313 --> 01:09:53,897 - Aah! - Let go of it. 865 01:09:54,315 --> 01:09:55,648 Let go. 866 01:10:19,340 --> 01:10:22,050 Thank you. Thank you. 867 01:10:22,718 --> 01:10:23,885 Who are you? 868 01:10:24,053 --> 01:10:27,472 Ah, they call me Dr. Love. 869 01:10:42,071 --> 01:10:46,366 Is it true that Gene Simmons had a cow's tongue grafted onto his real tongue? 870 01:10:46,575 --> 01:10:49,202 I think he, uh, had the piece of skin... 871 01:10:49,411 --> 01:10:52,580 ...under his tongue removed so he could stick it out farther. 872 01:10:53,332 --> 01:10:54,958 I was gonna send you this, but... 873 01:10:56,210 --> 01:10:57,877 - Ann Arbor? - Yeah. 874 01:10:58,087 --> 01:11:00,672 My dad's company is relocating him. 875 01:11:00,881 --> 01:11:03,258 That's why I was acting so freaky at school today. 876 01:11:03,467 --> 01:11:06,052 I thought it'd be the last time I'd ever get to see you. 877 01:11:18,941 --> 01:11:21,526 Oh, fuck. 878 01:11:23,112 --> 01:11:26,281 You'd better have something really sinful for me this time, son. 879 01:11:26,532 --> 01:11:28,866 All right, Father, here it is. 880 01:11:29,076 --> 01:11:33,997 I feel a little ashamed talking to you about this, but I went to my cousin's wedding. 881 01:11:34,206 --> 01:11:39,002 And one of the bridesmaids asked me if I wanted to take a bath. 882 01:11:39,378 --> 01:11:40,712 This is terrible. 883 01:11:40,921 --> 01:11:42,922 This girl was a total fox. 884 01:11:43,132 --> 01:11:47,135 So I finally gave in to temptation about a block away from the wedding reception... 885 01:11:47,344 --> 01:11:49,804 ...at this little motel that charges by the hour. 886 01:11:50,014 --> 01:11:51,973 When she peeled off that gown... 887 01:11:52,182 --> 01:11:57,437 ...you are not gonna believe what she was wearing underneath. 888 01:11:57,646 --> 01:11:58,688 Was it a teddy? 889 01:11:59,189 --> 01:12:01,899 - Oh, no. - A bustier? 890 01:12:02,234 --> 01:12:04,485 - Uh-uh. - Satin underwear? 891 01:12:06,238 --> 01:12:07,864 Crotchless panties? 892 01:12:08,365 --> 01:12:10,825 Leopard-skin bra? 893 01:12:11,201 --> 01:12:12,744 Fishnet leotard? 894 01:12:13,454 --> 01:12:15,371 A leather G-string? 895 01:12:17,374 --> 01:12:20,835 All right, guys, here. You want a sandwich? Come on. Go. Go! 896 01:12:21,879 --> 01:12:24,130 Okay, fuck it, man. I just... I give up. 897 01:12:28,844 --> 01:12:31,137 Oh, God, man, what now? Wolves? 898 01:12:43,525 --> 01:12:45,026 All right. 899 01:12:59,958 --> 01:13:04,253 So I jump in the car. I hot-wire it in, like, 30 seconds. I start driving. 900 01:13:04,463 --> 01:13:07,173 Suddenly, I hear this scream. The disco queen was asleep... 901 01:13:07,383 --> 01:13:08,758 ...in the backseat the whole time. 902 01:13:10,344 --> 01:13:14,138 - What are we gonna do with her anyway? - I don't know, but she looks like fun. 903 01:13:14,348 --> 01:13:15,473 Yeah. 904 01:13:19,520 --> 01:13:23,439 - Hey, hey, take it easy. - Aah! God. 905 01:13:23,649 --> 01:13:26,359 You don't wanna get any whiskey dick around here now. 906 01:13:26,568 --> 01:13:28,945 Of course, you don't have to worry about that, do you, woody? 907 01:13:29,113 --> 01:13:30,988 Ooh. Aah! 908 01:13:31,156 --> 01:13:34,033 Oh, shit! Oh, wow. 909 01:13:34,243 --> 01:13:36,661 I see you've met premature Peter. Heh, heh. 910 01:13:36,870 --> 01:13:38,871 - I'm sorry. - It's okay. 911 01:13:39,081 --> 01:13:40,957 It's been, uh, quite a night. 912 01:13:41,166 --> 01:13:43,709 So far, you've seen me and my dick throw up. 913 01:13:43,919 --> 01:13:46,754 Hey, I'm sure there's more where that came from, right? 914 01:13:50,259 --> 01:13:52,260 Now, come here. 915 01:13:56,974 --> 01:13:57,974 Oh. 916 01:14:05,315 --> 01:14:07,692 Better kill me before you do what you're thinking about... 917 01:14:07,901 --> 01:14:11,571 ...doing to me, because when I get angry, I can bite down very hard. 918 01:14:11,780 --> 01:14:14,949 Sweet Polly Purebred's got some spunk, huh? 919 01:14:15,159 --> 01:14:18,661 - I'll give her some spunk, all right. - We stripped that Beemer in 15 minutes. 920 01:14:18,871 --> 01:14:21,247 I'd say we could strip her in 15 seconds. 921 01:14:22,666 --> 01:14:25,376 Hey. Now, wait a minute, guys. Come on, two on one ain't fair. 922 01:14:25,961 --> 01:14:27,879 Why don't you let me get my friend Barbara? 923 01:14:28,088 --> 01:14:30,882 I'm telling you, you'd love her. Tits the size of your head. 924 01:14:31,091 --> 01:14:34,594 You'll feel like a little baby sucking on them. You guys like disco? 925 01:14:34,803 --> 01:14:36,762 I teach disco dancing back at my church. 926 01:14:36,972 --> 01:14:39,015 You look like you got a rhythm in your blood. 927 01:14:39,391 --> 01:14:41,893 Free lessons if you let me go. 928 01:14:42,227 --> 01:14:44,061 Oh, I know a dance we could do. 929 01:14:44,271 --> 01:14:46,522 The horizontal hustle. 930 01:14:50,569 --> 01:14:52,361 Hey, peanut turds. 931 01:14:53,155 --> 01:14:54,947 I'm here for the girl and the car. 932 01:14:55,157 --> 01:14:58,534 You can try to stop me, but you're not gonna like what happens if you do. 933 01:14:58,869 --> 01:15:01,162 It's too bad. He was such a young idiot. 934 01:15:01,830 --> 01:15:03,789 Hey, he's a stupid boy. 935 01:15:04,166 --> 01:15:05,750 He deserves to fucking die. 936 01:15:15,802 --> 01:15:17,845 Tear these grease monkeys a new asshole. 937 01:15:29,358 --> 01:15:32,944 One step out of that office, and your asses are Alpo. 938 01:15:36,365 --> 01:15:37,949 I always come prepared. 939 01:15:45,707 --> 01:15:49,168 Oh, wow, Lex. You're the coolest. 940 01:15:49,378 --> 01:15:52,547 I believe you were promised a ride to Disco Inferno. 941 01:15:52,756 --> 01:15:54,048 Let me escort you to the car. 942 01:15:54,258 --> 01:15:56,342 Hey, what about the fucking dogs? 943 01:15:56,677 --> 01:15:58,553 - You got a phone in there, man? - Yes. 944 01:15:58,762 --> 01:16:00,221 Call the cops. 945 01:16:06,979 --> 01:16:08,563 Beth, I feel like such an idiot. 946 01:16:08,772 --> 01:16:11,357 Why didn't I just say something a year and a half ago? 947 01:16:11,567 --> 01:16:13,568 Don't think about the past. 948 01:16:13,777 --> 01:16:17,822 Let's just think about from today on. 949 01:16:18,365 --> 01:16:19,991 I'll never forget you, Jam. 950 01:16:20,200 --> 01:16:22,326 - Church will never be the same. - Heh. 951 01:16:22,536 --> 01:16:24,161 Yeah. 952 01:16:40,012 --> 01:16:42,388 Goddamn it, Beth. 953 01:16:42,931 --> 01:16:44,348 Yeah, I'm coming, Dad. 954 01:16:46,059 --> 01:16:47,435 Well... 955 01:16:48,645 --> 01:16:52,315 So, um, I'll call you... 956 01:16:52,524 --> 01:16:53,858 ...as soon as we get a phone. 957 01:16:54,318 --> 01:16:55,651 - All right. - Yeah. 958 01:16:56,903 --> 01:16:58,070 Bye. 959 01:16:58,655 --> 01:17:00,114 Bye. 960 01:17:21,345 --> 01:17:24,096 - I hope this helps. - No, no. You know what? 961 01:17:24,306 --> 01:17:27,183 Strange as it may seem, I don't think I can take the money. 962 01:17:27,392 --> 01:17:30,770 It's just... It'll cheapen the whole experience. 963 01:17:30,979 --> 01:17:33,105 I ain't no midnight cowboy or anything like that. 964 01:17:35,817 --> 01:17:37,610 I'm not paying you for the lovemaking. 965 01:17:38,362 --> 01:17:42,448 I want you to have this for whatever it was you needed it for when I made the offer. 966 01:17:47,454 --> 01:17:50,206 Thanks. Yeah. 967 01:17:50,415 --> 01:17:51,832 Was there any money taken? 968 01:17:52,042 --> 01:17:55,628 Nope. But it is Smiley Mart's policy to hand over a cash reward... 969 01:17:55,837 --> 01:18:00,549 ...of a hundred and fifty dollars to anyone who stops a robbery. 970 01:18:00,759 --> 01:18:03,761 I gave him the money and he took off. 971 01:18:04,638 --> 01:18:06,472 Yeah, okay. Uh... 972 01:18:06,682 --> 01:18:09,809 Thanks. Hey, you see this guy again, you give us a call, all right? 973 01:18:10,018 --> 01:18:12,144 We wanna ask him a few questions. 974 01:18:12,354 --> 01:18:14,438 If I see Dr. Love again anytime soon... 975 01:18:14,648 --> 01:18:18,192 ...you're gonna have to wait till I'm done with him first. 976 01:18:24,449 --> 01:18:26,325 One-thirty... 977 01:18:26,535 --> 01:18:29,245 ...140 and 150. 978 01:18:29,454 --> 01:18:31,539 That's all I got, man. 979 01:18:35,836 --> 01:18:37,878 Tsk, tsk. tsk. 980 01:18:38,088 --> 01:18:41,841 I really wanted things to work out for you, my weaselly, dimwitted friend. 981 01:18:42,300 --> 01:18:45,219 You got spunk. Chongo. 982 01:19:03,780 --> 01:19:06,073 At least I still got you, Stretch. 983 01:19:11,037 --> 01:19:12,455 I took his head off. 984 01:19:20,338 --> 01:19:22,548 Kiss? How dare they call themselves Kiss. 985 01:19:22,758 --> 01:19:23,799 Kiss is about love. 986 01:19:24,593 --> 01:19:29,388 They are teaching our children lust, betrayal, and hate. 987 01:19:29,598 --> 01:19:33,225 - We, as parents are obligated... - How's it going, Mom? 988 01:19:33,435 --> 01:19:37,480 - Jeremiah. - I'm gonna ask you this nicely first. 989 01:19:37,773 --> 01:19:39,231 Can I have my drumsticks back? 990 01:19:39,441 --> 01:19:43,319 Your drumsticks are the least of your worries, young man. 991 01:19:43,528 --> 01:19:45,112 You ran out on God. 992 01:19:45,322 --> 01:19:48,032 My son just ran out on God. 993 01:19:48,241 --> 01:19:52,495 - You are in a world of... - Trouble? Ha-ha-ha! 994 01:19:52,704 --> 01:19:56,499 I've been in trouble for the past 12 hours. Hello? 995 01:19:57,209 --> 01:19:59,543 I'm gonna be in St. Bernard's boarding school... 996 01:19:59,753 --> 01:20:02,087 ...for the next two years of my life. - Yes. 997 01:20:02,297 --> 01:20:05,424 I'm gonna be out of your hair until I am a legal adult. 998 01:20:05,634 --> 01:20:07,593 - Yes! - All you have to do is go to church... 999 01:20:07,803 --> 01:20:10,262 ...light a candle, and pray to some stupid statue... 1000 01:20:10,472 --> 01:20:12,515 ...and all is forgiven and forgotten, right? 1001 01:20:12,724 --> 01:20:15,267 Then you can spend your days in a guilt-free pursuit... 1002 01:20:15,477 --> 01:20:17,269 ...of more constructive activities... 1003 01:20:17,479 --> 01:20:21,190 ...like telling everybody else how screwed up their lives are. 1004 01:20:21,399 --> 01:20:24,485 Then you no longer need the patience and understanding required... 1005 01:20:24,694 --> 01:20:28,781 ...in order to talk to your own son on some normal plane. 1006 01:20:28,990 --> 01:20:32,451 And that way, you don't even need to think about how tough it was for you... 1007 01:20:32,661 --> 01:20:35,246 ...when you were growing up, probably a good thing too... 1008 01:20:35,455 --> 01:20:37,790 ...because if you did, you'd realize what a lousy... 1009 01:20:37,999 --> 01:20:40,918 ...goddamn, shitty-ass parent you are. 1010 01:20:44,464 --> 01:20:46,173 Jeremiah... 1011 01:20:46,383 --> 01:20:47,925 ...what has gotten into you? 1012 01:20:49,719 --> 01:20:53,180 I just lost my virginity in a confessional booth! 1013 01:20:53,390 --> 01:20:55,975 Lord have mercy! 1014 01:20:57,477 --> 01:21:01,730 - Oh, my goodness. - Now, for the last time... 1015 01:21:01,940 --> 01:21:06,735 ...Mom, give me back my fucking drumsticks. 1016 01:21:07,904 --> 01:21:09,488 Please. 1017 01:21:24,921 --> 01:21:26,380 Cute. 1018 01:21:43,648 --> 01:21:45,941 They grow up fast, don't they? 1019 01:21:49,404 --> 01:21:52,865 Hey, dude. Dude, I got the cash, man. Check it out. 1020 01:21:53,074 --> 01:21:54,074 No! 1021 01:21:54,284 --> 01:21:56,201 No, that can't be the last ticket! 1022 01:21:56,411 --> 01:21:58,203 God! No, no, no! 1023 01:21:58,413 --> 01:22:01,081 You fucking bastard! 1024 01:22:01,291 --> 01:22:02,291 Oh. 1025 01:22:44,876 --> 01:22:46,001 Any luck? 1026 01:22:46,211 --> 01:22:50,464 Yeah, man, plenty, heh. But it was all bad, man. 1027 01:22:50,674 --> 01:22:51,757 I found the Volvo. 1028 01:22:51,967 --> 01:22:53,634 Oh, yeah? 1029 01:22:55,011 --> 01:22:57,972 - Tickets? - No. 1030 01:23:02,018 --> 01:23:03,852 Wait a second. I know how we can get in. 1031 01:23:04,354 --> 01:23:07,898 I say that we all beat the shit out of each other, right? 1032 01:23:08,108 --> 01:23:09,441 We go to the ticket taker... 1033 01:23:09,651 --> 01:23:12,444 ...and we say that we got mugged and our tickets were stolen. 1034 01:23:12,654 --> 01:23:16,949 I mean, they have to let us in then, right? They have to. 1035 01:23:21,121 --> 01:23:22,121 Why not? 1036 01:23:52,527 --> 01:23:55,195 - Okay, thanks, man. - Go. 1037 01:23:55,405 --> 01:23:58,323 No! No! God! 1038 01:23:58,533 --> 01:24:00,826 Oh, man, you gotta let us in. 1039 01:24:01,036 --> 01:24:02,703 Four muggers just stole our tickets. 1040 01:24:02,912 --> 01:24:04,747 Heh. You expect me to believe that? 1041 01:24:05,206 --> 01:24:07,291 Are you fucking kidding me? 1042 01:24:08,376 --> 01:24:09,626 Look at us. 1043 01:24:11,463 --> 01:24:16,592 Hey, it was those assholes right there! They stole our tickets! Number 13! 1044 01:24:16,801 --> 01:24:18,343 Hey, stop those guys. 1045 01:24:20,847 --> 01:24:21,847 No. 1046 01:24:23,975 --> 01:24:25,976 - They got tickets. - Let's see. Come here. 1047 01:24:26,186 --> 01:24:27,770 They even stole my wallet, man. 1048 01:24:27,979 --> 01:24:30,439 I've never even seen these assholes before. 1049 01:24:30,648 --> 01:24:33,859 In there, you'll find my Kiss Army picture ID... 1050 01:24:34,069 --> 01:24:35,903 ...and a hundred fifty bucks cash. 1051 01:24:43,745 --> 01:24:45,913 - Out of here. Come on. - Damn. 1052 01:24:46,664 --> 01:24:49,083 Tsk, tsk, tsk. 1053 01:24:49,292 --> 01:24:51,210 My midget weaselly friend. 1054 01:24:51,419 --> 01:24:55,089 I was really hoping things could work out for you, you know? 1055 01:24:55,298 --> 01:24:57,257 You got spunk. 1056 01:24:57,926 --> 01:25:00,594 - Go. - I got it, man. 1057 01:25:00,804 --> 01:25:02,304 We're going. 1058 01:25:29,999 --> 01:25:31,667 Okay, then. 1059 01:25:42,554 --> 01:25:45,681 We want Kiss! We want Kiss! 1060 01:25:45,890 --> 01:25:49,935 We want Kiss! We want Kiss! We want Kiss! 1061 01:25:50,145 --> 01:25:54,565 We want Kiss! We want Kiss! We want Kiss! 1062 01:25:54,774 --> 01:26:00,154 We want Kiss! We want Kiss! We want Kiss! 1063 01:26:00,363 --> 01:26:01,989 This is it. 1064 01:26:05,869 --> 01:26:08,453 You wanted the best, and you got the best! 1065 01:26:08,663 --> 01:26:12,416 The hottest band in the world, Kiss! 1066 01:26:30,351 --> 01:26:32,811 I feel uptight on a Saturday night 1067 01:26:33,021 --> 01:26:34,229 Oh, shit! 1068 01:26:35,565 --> 01:26:39,818 Nine o'clock The radio's the only light 1069 01:26:41,154 --> 01:26:43,739 I hear my song and it pulls me through 1070 01:26:46,784 --> 01:26:50,078 It comes on strong Tells me what I got to do 1071 01:26:50,288 --> 01:26:52,289 - I got to - Get up 1072 01:26:52,498 --> 01:26:54,333 Everybody's gonna move their feet 1073 01:26:54,542 --> 01:26:57,920 Get down Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1074 01:26:59,422 --> 01:27:02,633 You gotta lose your mind in Detroit Rock City 1075 01:27:02,842 --> 01:27:05,469 Get up Everybody's gonna move their feet 1076 01:27:05,678 --> 01:27:08,388 Get down Everybody's gonna leave their seat 1077 01:27:29,202 --> 01:27:31,370 Movin' fast Doin' ninety five 1078 01:27:34,165 --> 01:27:38,168 I hit top speed Still movin' much too slow 1079 01:27:39,796 --> 01:27:41,922 I feel so good I'm so alive 1080 01:27:42,131 --> 01:27:43,257 I'm so alive 1081 01:27:45,260 --> 01:27:48,428 I hear my song playin' on the radio 1082 01:27:48,846 --> 01:27:50,138 And it goes 1083 01:27:50,348 --> 01:27:53,433 Get up Everybody's gonna move their feet 1084 01:28:09,367 --> 01:28:10,492 Yeah! 1085 01:28:13,788 --> 01:28:15,872 Oh, my God! 1086 01:28:19,252 --> 01:28:23,839 Get up Everybody's gonna move their feet 1087 01:34:29,455 --> 01:34:32,040 - But we don't have any Kiss tickets. - Yeah. Kiss sucks! 1088 01:34:32,041 --> 01:34:34,042 - But we don't have any Kiss tickets. - Yeah. Kiss sucks! 80201

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