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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,264 ["Diggin' This Right Here" playing] 2 00:00:32,767 --> 00:00:34,334 [alarm ringing] 3 00:00:36,504 --> 00:00:37,404 [grunts] 4 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,543 Oh, crap. 5 00:00:43,277 --> 00:00:45,547 [alarm stops ringing] [groans] 6 00:00:55,823 --> 00:00:57,224 [sighs] 7 00:00:57,257 --> 00:00:58,292 Shit. 8 00:01:08,435 --> 00:01:09,403 [phone ringing] 9 00:01:10,605 --> 00:01:13,140 Oh, God. [Chaim] Hey, thinking about tonight. 10 00:01:13,173 --> 00:01:14,642 Why don't we just stay in? 11 00:01:14,676 --> 00:01:17,879 Hang out and talk about life, you know? 12 00:01:17,912 --> 00:01:21,481 Sounds refreshing, but I have my sister's engagement thing tonight. 13 00:01:21,516 --> 00:01:24,117 [Chaim] Oh, hell yeah, I'm in! I'll be there. 14 00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:28,990 Oh, no. No, it's-- it's family stuff so you could totally be out if you wanted to. 15 00:01:29,023 --> 00:01:33,460 Okay, listen, Nicole, uh, I actually think that we need to talk. 16 00:01:33,493 --> 00:01:36,965 Okay, aren't we currently talking right now? I don't-- 17 00:01:36,998 --> 00:01:38,833 You are completely shut off. 18 00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:41,168 [gasps] I'm not. 19 00:01:41,669 --> 00:01:43,370 I am not shut off. 20 00:01:43,403 --> 00:01:46,273 It feels like you're incapable of loving anyone. 21 00:01:46,306 --> 00:01:47,976 Chaim, can we just, like-- 22 00:01:48,009 --> 00:01:51,012 That's not even my name. It's Chaim. 23 00:01:51,045 --> 00:01:52,580 Okay, Chaim. 24 00:01:52,614 --> 00:01:54,015 Chaim! Chaim. 25 00:01:54,048 --> 00:01:55,449 [Chaim] Chaim! 26 00:01:55,482 --> 00:01:57,552 [Nicole] I'm saying that. Look, I'm sorry. 27 00:01:57,585 --> 00:02:00,454 [drive-through attendant] Pull up to the next window. 28 00:02:01,089 --> 00:02:02,890 [phone ringing] 29 00:02:04,025 --> 00:02:05,292 Hey, sweetie. 30 00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:06,460 Latte with oat? Yeah. 31 00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:08,161 Is that a girl? Oh, my-- 32 00:02:08,195 --> 00:02:09,764 No. I'm not-- It's-- Did she spend the night? 33 00:02:09,797 --> 00:02:11,966 -I'm at a drive-through. Goodbye. -Is she cute? 34 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,167 [attendant] Um, here you go. Oh, thank you. 35 00:02:14,201 --> 00:02:15,570 [chuckles] [groans] 36 00:02:15,603 --> 00:02:17,505 -Thank you. -Yeah. 37 00:02:21,709 --> 00:02:23,310 Just a quick sanitize. 38 00:02:23,343 --> 00:02:25,412 [radio host] This is KCLW, 39 00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:28,215 and you're listening to We Chill Radio Station in Seattle. 40 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:31,418 Next up, we have a track that will ease your mind 41 00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:33,286 and kick-start your morning with some meditative-- 42 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:36,858 There was that one time where I was telling you about a dream that I had. 43 00:02:36,891 --> 00:02:40,061 -Oh. My lip balm. -You don't even talk to me about your dreams. 44 00:02:40,094 --> 00:02:41,562 [radio host] And it's another pleasant day. 45 00:02:41,596 --> 00:02:44,866 -[tires screeching] -Fuck! What the fuck? 46 00:02:46,233 --> 00:02:47,869 [Chaim] ...and to share an emotional-- Got it. 47 00:02:47,902 --> 00:02:49,469 -[horn honking] -Thank you. 48 00:02:49,504 --> 00:02:51,673 [radio host] 60,000 fans will be there to cheer them on. 49 00:02:51,706 --> 00:02:56,544 [guide on recording] Welcome to your guided meditation experience. 50 00:02:56,577 --> 00:02:59,346 Before we begin, remind yourself that this is a time... 51 00:02:59,379 --> 00:03:02,416 -[sighs] Okay, I can do it. -...for you and you alone. 52 00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:05,787 I'm just gonna walk into the office 53 00:03:05,820 --> 00:03:08,523 and not be weird. 54 00:03:08,556 --> 00:03:10,223 [guide] Relax your neck... They're just... 55 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:11,458 ...and shoulders. 56 00:03:11,491 --> 00:03:14,662 ...people that I actually know. 57 00:03:15,797 --> 00:03:19,000 Deepen your breath in through the nose... 58 00:03:19,033 --> 00:03:20,702 -Okay. -...and out through the mouth. 59 00:03:20,735 --> 00:03:22,235 [horn honks] [gasps] 60 00:03:22,269 --> 00:03:24,438 I hate people. I hate people. 61 00:03:24,471 --> 00:03:27,274 -[horn honking] -Yeah. God. 62 00:03:27,307 --> 00:03:28,910 [horn honks] Yeah, okay! 63 00:03:30,945 --> 00:03:33,213 -And travel your consciousness down for-- -[inhales] Okay. 64 00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:35,315 -[ringtone blares] -God-- 65 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:38,119 Bro, this is getting ridiculous. 66 00:03:38,152 --> 00:03:40,088 I was planning on coming in. 67 00:03:40,121 --> 00:03:42,657 It's just, my uncle's in the hospital with, um, a thing. 68 00:03:42,690 --> 00:03:44,525 And, um... [Sid] You're such a liar, Max. 69 00:03:44,559 --> 00:03:46,661 Someone already saw you outside. 70 00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:49,831 And I'm looking at you from my window right now, 71 00:03:49,864 --> 00:03:51,632 circling the parking lot looking like a freak. 72 00:03:51,666 --> 00:03:54,769 -Look like a student driver, bro. -I-- 73 00:03:54,802 --> 00:03:58,906 -Look, I know things are rough, man, but-- -You don't-- [sighs] 74 00:03:58,940 --> 00:04:00,508 Are you okay? 75 00:04:00,541 --> 00:04:03,010 I can't explain it, okay? I just-- I-I don't know. 76 00:04:03,044 --> 00:04:04,746 I mean, my-- my-- 77 00:04:04,779 --> 00:04:07,148 my heart's beating really fast, and I'm-- I'm sweating, 78 00:04:07,181 --> 00:04:08,616 and I just, um-- It's just-- 79 00:04:08,649 --> 00:04:11,284 You are really taking advantage of my post-COVID, 80 00:04:11,318 --> 00:04:13,087 very liberal work-from-home policy. 81 00:04:13,121 --> 00:04:16,389 -This is a real condition, Sid. Okay? -I know, social anxiety is real. 82 00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:18,325 I feel for you, dog. I seen the commercials. 83 00:04:18,358 --> 00:04:21,863 You gotta snap that shit quick, 'cause I can't protect you anymore. 84 00:04:21,896 --> 00:04:23,430 You're gonna get canned. 85 00:04:23,463 --> 00:04:25,833 I can't do it. I can't do it. 86 00:04:25,867 --> 00:04:28,435 I'm going to talk to my fucking therapist. 87 00:04:30,337 --> 00:04:32,807 [Max] I blew off the office. Again. 88 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,208 I did go get coffee, 89 00:04:34,242 --> 00:04:37,277 but, um, it was the-- it was the drive-through. 90 00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:40,181 Sorry. No need to apologize, Max. 91 00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:45,352 Yeah. No, no, I know. I just-- You know, I just feel like a helpless idiot. 92 00:04:45,385 --> 00:04:47,688 Well, I don't listen to helpless idiots. 93 00:04:48,656 --> 00:04:50,258 Uh... 94 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:52,193 you're my therapist, so-- 95 00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:53,426 It's called mirroring. 96 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,796 -It's a therapy technique. -Oh. 97 00:04:54,829 --> 00:04:57,165 Shows you how you talk about yourself. 98 00:04:57,198 --> 00:04:59,567 Oh, wow, that's-- that's cool. Um... 99 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:02,402 -And that-- that's supposed to help? -Rarely. 100 00:05:02,435 --> 00:05:07,108 Perhaps now it's time to introduce something a little different. 101 00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:08,810 Oh, yeah? Something else? 102 00:05:08,843 --> 00:05:10,011 Pet therapy. 103 00:05:10,044 --> 00:05:11,846 [sighs] Now listen, 104 00:05:11,879 --> 00:05:15,382 if you can talk to a dog and make an emotional connection, 105 00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:18,586 it can help you learn how to connect with people. 106 00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,988 -Um... -Dogs teach acceptance. 107 00:05:21,022 --> 00:05:24,725 It's just, you know, a dog is a serious invasion of my, um, space. 108 00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:27,728 Max, we need to take some bold steps here. 109 00:05:27,762 --> 00:05:31,065 -I'm not sure I'm capable-- -Do you have a problem with dogs, Max? 110 00:05:31,098 --> 00:05:32,332 Well, I just-- 111 00:05:32,365 --> 00:05:34,702 I don't have a problem with a dog. 112 00:05:34,735 --> 00:05:37,104 "I don't have a problem with a dog." 113 00:05:37,138 --> 00:05:38,471 What? "What?" 114 00:05:38,506 --> 00:05:40,541 -I'm sorry. -I'm sorry. I just-- 115 00:05:42,310 --> 00:05:43,744 That was mirroring. 116 00:05:43,778 --> 00:05:46,047 Mirroring. Mm-hmm. 117 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,649 -Um... -Go out, Max. 118 00:05:48,683 --> 00:05:53,821 Go out and make a canine connection. 119 00:05:54,288 --> 00:05:55,523 Yeah, I get it. 120 00:05:56,791 --> 00:06:00,628 -Hey. Whatever-his-name broke up with me. -Oh, no. Really? 121 00:06:00,661 --> 00:06:04,665 Yeah. He said I was closed off, but, like, I let him in. 122 00:06:04,699 --> 00:06:05,900 Like, in. 123 00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:08,135 You know there are other kinds of intimacy, right? 124 00:06:08,169 --> 00:06:09,837 All the way in. 125 00:06:09,871 --> 00:06:12,073 I'm just worried Bumble's gonna raise its price on ya. 126 00:06:12,106 --> 00:06:16,043 Listen, I have a lot going on right now with work and just, like, life in general. 127 00:06:16,077 --> 00:06:18,946 And I know that I have my needs, but I don't need a guy for that. 128 00:06:18,980 --> 00:06:20,615 Serious question. 129 00:06:20,648 --> 00:06:23,684 Do I put my real height in my profile or my height in heels? 130 00:06:23,718 --> 00:06:27,487 Uh, not needed. Tonight we're going out. [Nicole] Oh, thank God. 131 00:06:27,521 --> 00:06:32,593 [muttering] I think this will look good here. 132 00:06:35,196 --> 00:06:36,463 These are pretty good. 133 00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:39,100 -Oh, thanks. Here. -Mmm. 134 00:06:39,133 --> 00:06:41,636 Listen. 135 00:06:41,669 --> 00:06:45,039 Hunter Fosterini is putting his Bellevue estate on the market. 136 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:47,208 Wait, CEO of Crypt-Yo? 137 00:06:47,241 --> 00:06:49,710 He's hired me to stage it. Really? 138 00:06:49,744 --> 00:06:51,612 But with the twins coming, 139 00:06:51,646 --> 00:06:54,315 I'm finally promoting you to do it solo. 140 00:06:54,348 --> 00:06:56,317 Oh, my God. Stacey, are you serious? That-- 141 00:06:56,350 --> 00:06:57,885 Wow, I-- 142 00:06:57,919 --> 00:06:58,920 It's make-or-break. 143 00:06:58,953 --> 00:07:01,289 Yeah. No, I know that. [chuckles] 144 00:07:01,322 --> 00:07:05,026 As one strong woman to you, 145 00:07:05,059 --> 00:07:06,661 don't mess it up. 146 00:07:06,694 --> 00:07:08,296 I-- I won't. I will not. 147 00:07:08,329 --> 00:07:09,797 I will-- I won't let you down. 148 00:07:09,830 --> 00:07:11,866 Just make him feel good about himself. 149 00:07:11,899 --> 00:07:15,403 Blur the line between stager and potential sexual partner. 150 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,538 That's how you'll succeed. 151 00:07:27,114 --> 00:07:30,017 Oh. Hi. 152 00:07:32,253 --> 00:07:33,654 Wait, are you somebody's? 153 00:07:34,655 --> 00:07:38,292 Oh, no, no, no. No, no. No, no, no. I'm sorry. 154 00:07:38,326 --> 00:07:42,096 Sorry, buddy. I've just got to go find an outfit for my sister to criticize. 155 00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,531 But good luck, okay? 156 00:07:46,033 --> 00:07:48,302 [attendant] Thank you for coming down and checking us out. 157 00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:52,540 You know, these dogs do deserve a loving home. [dogs barking] 158 00:07:52,573 --> 00:07:56,744 And I got the perfect fucking guy for you. Real beauty. 159 00:07:56,777 --> 00:08:00,214 Just needs some belly rubs and tolerance training. 160 00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:01,749 -[dog barking] -Oh, my-- 161 00:08:01,782 --> 00:08:03,584 Don't worry, he'll get bigger. 162 00:08:03,617 --> 00:08:04,819 [Max] That's a therapy dog? 163 00:08:04,852 --> 00:08:06,486 Oh, yeah. He's perfect for you. 164 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:07,989 You're not gonna have any problems with this guy. 165 00:08:08,022 --> 00:08:10,257 He'll destroy anyone that messes with you. 166 00:08:10,291 --> 00:08:12,259 Um, I-- [barking continues] 167 00:08:12,293 --> 00:08:14,528 I mean, I've seen him go ballistic. 168 00:08:14,562 --> 00:08:17,698 Anyone look him directly in the eye, they're fucked! 169 00:08:17,732 --> 00:08:19,834 I don't think this is a good idea. [barking continues] 170 00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:21,969 What? I'm sorry, I just-- I don't need a-- 171 00:08:22,003 --> 00:08:24,438 Well, don't worry about it. No problem. We've got some other dogs. 172 00:08:24,472 --> 00:08:27,074 Hmm. Ah. 173 00:08:27,108 --> 00:08:30,611 What about this cute little one right here, huh? 174 00:08:33,114 --> 00:08:34,248 [chuckles] 175 00:08:38,052 --> 00:08:39,420 [Max] What's her name? 176 00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:41,155 [attendant] Well, it's up to you, my dude. 177 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,758 Just bring her back in a week to get spayed. 178 00:08:44,592 --> 00:08:46,861 She might be perfect for you. 179 00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:50,031 Yeah, maybe she is. 180 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:53,834 [chuckles] 181 00:08:57,838 --> 00:08:59,640 [sighs] 182 00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:03,944 Sorry, I'm just-- I'm just a little nervous. Uh... 183 00:09:06,047 --> 00:09:07,815 [sighs] 184 00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:11,185 Well, hey, if you wanna change anything, that's fine. You know? 185 00:09:12,887 --> 00:09:15,322 Just run it by me first, if that's cool. 186 00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:22,396 So what will I call you? 187 00:09:22,430 --> 00:09:25,766 King Charles? Or Queen Charles? 188 00:09:30,604 --> 00:09:32,907 What do you think about, uh, Chloe? 189 00:09:37,278 --> 00:09:41,082 I think I'm gonna call you Chloe, if that's okay. 190 00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:43,350 Great. 191 00:09:43,384 --> 00:09:45,453 Do you want to do a tour? 192 00:09:45,486 --> 00:09:50,157 Um, I work in IT. This is my work-from-home station. 193 00:09:50,191 --> 00:09:52,460 Popped for Xfinity, so my Internet's crazy fast, 194 00:09:52,493 --> 00:09:54,261 like, over a gig. 195 00:09:55,629 --> 00:09:57,031 Trust me, that's really fast. 196 00:09:57,064 --> 00:09:59,467 I mean, I-- I could talk about this shelf all day. 197 00:09:59,500 --> 00:10:02,504 We got an unopened '80s original right here. 198 00:10:02,537 --> 00:10:04,805 And this whole collection is just next-level. 199 00:10:04,839 --> 00:10:10,177 Oh, and-- So Brando smoked this for one take in The Godfather. 200 00:10:10,211 --> 00:10:13,180 I mean, supposedly. It didn't make the final cut of the film. 201 00:10:13,214 --> 00:10:18,719 But he did smoke a cigar in the poster, so it's still kind of dope. [exhales] 202 00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:21,355 This is my keyboard. 203 00:10:22,323 --> 00:10:24,625 [keyboard playing] [laughs] 204 00:10:25,059 --> 00:10:26,827 That's not bad. 205 00:10:26,861 --> 00:10:28,863 And, you know, it can be yours, if you want. 206 00:10:28,896 --> 00:10:33,434 I'm-- I'm really tired of making music just for myself, so... 207 00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:36,137 Well... [sighs] ...that's it. 208 00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:38,507 That's me. 209 00:10:38,540 --> 00:10:40,307 It's impressive, right? 210 00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:43,110 Oh, thank you. 211 00:10:43,144 --> 00:10:44,712 That's fine, I guess. 212 00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:47,948 Wow. 213 00:10:49,350 --> 00:10:50,951 [sighs] 214 00:10:57,158 --> 00:10:58,392 [exhales] Okay. 215 00:11:01,395 --> 00:11:03,998 Mom? Hello? 216 00:11:06,601 --> 00:11:07,902 [sighs] 217 00:11:14,509 --> 00:11:15,809 [cat hisses] [gasps] 218 00:11:15,843 --> 00:11:17,444 -[meows] -[groans] 219 00:11:17,478 --> 00:11:22,316 -Princess, you are looking hypoallergenic. -[hisses] 220 00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:24,118 [Nicole's mother] Nicole? 221 00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:25,186 [meows] 222 00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,056 Hey! 223 00:11:29,524 --> 00:11:31,959 -Shoes. -Oh. 224 00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:34,929 Shoes, Nicole. You know we don't wear shoes in the house. 225 00:11:34,962 --> 00:11:36,997 [sighs] It's good to see you too, Mom. 226 00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:41,168 Hi, Sis. I'm home. 227 00:11:41,202 --> 00:11:42,236 Hi! 228 00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:43,572 Shoes! 229 00:11:43,605 --> 00:11:46,608 Okay. I don't think we've met yet. 230 00:11:46,641 --> 00:11:47,908 Oh! Hi. 231 00:11:47,942 --> 00:11:50,744 -Nicole, this is Alistair. -[Nicole] Hello. 232 00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:54,281 He flew all the way here to ask Mom for my hand. 233 00:11:54,315 --> 00:11:55,916 [Alistair] Well, of course. Oh, wow. That-- 234 00:11:55,950 --> 00:11:57,718 I had to come for this. [kisses] Oh. [giggles] 235 00:11:57,751 --> 00:12:00,254 -Mom, is this your ring? -[both giggling] 236 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:03,958 Well, you're hardly galloping down the aisle, Nic. 237 00:12:04,526 --> 00:12:05,993 [timer dings] 238 00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:08,495 So, how's work going, Nicole? 239 00:12:08,530 --> 00:12:11,865 Uh, oh, really good, actually. 240 00:12:11,899 --> 00:12:15,970 Yeah, Stacey promoted me to head stager today, I think. 241 00:12:16,003 --> 00:12:17,771 [gasps] She's killing it. 242 00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:21,543 -Number two for Stacey Dorin, a legend in home staging. -Oh, my God. 243 00:12:21,576 --> 00:12:24,613 Nicole's a very talented artist. She could have gone to art school. 244 00:12:24,646 --> 00:12:28,215 But instead she chose to spend her life rearranging furniture. [chuckles] 245 00:12:28,249 --> 00:12:32,853 It's home staging, Mom, in highest-luxury real estate. 246 00:12:32,886 --> 00:12:35,289 You make it sound like it's musical chairs. 247 00:12:35,322 --> 00:12:37,659 She turned down a spot at U-Dub for art and design. 248 00:12:37,692 --> 00:12:40,327 Yeah, well, someone needed to take care of Dad 249 00:12:40,361 --> 00:12:41,795 while you were in Paris, so... 250 00:12:41,829 --> 00:12:43,665 -See what I mean? Defensiveness. -[Alistair] Mm-hmm. 251 00:12:43,698 --> 00:12:46,300 I mean, she's been completely closed off these last three years. 252 00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:49,803 -Curious. -Mom, I'm literally sitting right here. 253 00:12:49,837 --> 00:12:52,006 -I mean, she parties every night. -Yeah. 254 00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:56,443 But I'm afraid deep down she's really lonely. 255 00:12:56,477 --> 00:12:58,245 -Fascinating. -Oh, my God, Mom. 256 00:12:58,279 --> 00:13:01,782 Why are you discussing this with Alistair? 257 00:13:01,815 --> 00:13:04,151 Because he's British, Nicole. 258 00:13:08,055 --> 00:13:10,257 [people chattering] [glass smashes] 259 00:13:10,291 --> 00:13:13,528 Nothing good happens out there past 9:00 p.m. 260 00:13:14,729 --> 00:13:17,865 Just a bunch of packed bars 261 00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:21,536 and people breathing on each other. 262 00:13:21,569 --> 00:13:23,904 ♪ I, I, I can't go now♪ 263 00:13:23,937 --> 00:13:27,441 ♪ DJ's playing My, my, my, my song now♪ 264 00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:30,411 ♪ But if you want To wait all night♪ 265 00:13:30,444 --> 00:13:36,417 ♪ I just might Go all the way With you tonight♪ 266 00:13:36,450 --> 00:13:38,986 ♪ Erase the visual You like my--♪ 267 00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:40,622 You killed it on the bridge. 268 00:13:40,655 --> 00:13:44,325 Uh, no, you killed it. Oh, my God. 269 00:13:47,629 --> 00:13:51,766 Yeah, there are zero one-night-standable guys in this bar. 270 00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:54,602 -[loud rock playing] -[feedback squeals] 271 00:13:56,103 --> 00:13:57,905 [singer shouts] Oh, my God. 272 00:14:00,775 --> 00:14:03,377 [Chloe whining, barks] Seriously? 273 00:14:04,845 --> 00:14:07,281 [sighs] Chloe, what are you-- 274 00:14:07,682 --> 00:14:09,049 [groans] 275 00:14:09,083 --> 00:14:11,952 [sighs] You need this right now? 276 00:14:12,554 --> 00:14:14,388 Okay, hold on. 277 00:14:16,990 --> 00:14:18,926 [whirs, buzzes] 278 00:14:19,828 --> 00:14:21,428 [grunting] 279 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:26,634 Okay. 280 00:14:27,802 --> 00:14:29,169 Hmm. 281 00:14:31,071 --> 00:14:32,106 Oh. 282 00:14:32,607 --> 00:14:34,642 Hi. 283 00:14:34,676 --> 00:14:36,343 Who are you? 284 00:14:36,377 --> 00:14:38,847 Delivery guy. 285 00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:42,082 Well, I'm willing to receive a delivery. 286 00:14:44,619 --> 00:14:46,186 Of a guy. 287 00:14:48,590 --> 00:14:51,392 Pad thai with beef for Rahul. 288 00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:55,429 No, okay. 289 00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:58,031 -Here you go. -[beeping] 290 00:14:58,065 --> 00:15:00,702 [door buzzes] All right. 291 00:15:00,735 --> 00:15:03,370 Have a good night, delivery guy. 292 00:15:03,404 --> 00:15:05,439 -Thank you. -See ya. 293 00:15:05,472 --> 00:15:07,241 Ugh. 294 00:15:09,309 --> 00:15:11,078 [sighs] 295 00:15:11,513 --> 00:15:13,648 [beeping] 296 00:15:13,681 --> 00:15:15,517 Hey, Chaim. 297 00:15:15,550 --> 00:15:18,018 Oh, I'm sorry. Chaim. 298 00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:19,788 Hello, it's me. 299 00:15:19,821 --> 00:15:23,023 Listen, I just wanted to let you know that I can let people in. 300 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,560 I actually let so many people in. 301 00:15:25,593 --> 00:15:26,994 Everyone in but you. 302 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:32,466 And I am capable of love, so thank you. 303 00:15:32,499 --> 00:15:34,201 And good night. Goodbye. 304 00:15:34,702 --> 00:15:37,572 Idiot. [sighs] 305 00:15:40,875 --> 00:15:43,377 Buddy, you're still here? 306 00:15:43,778 --> 00:15:45,245 [groans] 307 00:15:45,647 --> 00:15:46,681 [sighs] 308 00:15:46,714 --> 00:15:48,583 Oh, man. No. 309 00:15:48,616 --> 00:15:50,417 Don't look at me like a person. 310 00:15:50,451 --> 00:15:52,620 [whimpering] 311 00:15:52,654 --> 00:15:53,721 [sighs] 312 00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:59,794 Okay. All right. Come on. 313 00:15:59,828 --> 00:16:02,196 One-night stand, all right? 314 00:16:02,229 --> 00:16:03,263 Let's go. 315 00:16:03,964 --> 00:16:05,900 Make yourself at home. 316 00:16:05,934 --> 00:16:08,536 Oh, sorry about the mess. Just-- 317 00:16:08,570 --> 00:16:12,039 [sighs] Put some music on. [keys jangle] 318 00:16:12,072 --> 00:16:14,609 Just gonna make a drink. [humming] 319 00:16:15,710 --> 00:16:16,945 Yum, yum, yum, yum. 320 00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:21,081 Oh! No! Ooh, no, no, no. No. 321 00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:23,685 That lo mein is, like, weeks old. [sniffs] 322 00:16:23,718 --> 00:16:25,452 Oh, God. 323 00:16:25,486 --> 00:16:28,756 Is that you or is that the noodles? 324 00:16:28,790 --> 00:16:30,658 ["Guiding Light" playing] 325 00:16:30,692 --> 00:16:32,092 Come on, we'll get you washed up. 326 00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:33,561 Come on. Come on, buddy. 327 00:16:33,595 --> 00:16:36,396 ♪ No more work Or things to do♪ 328 00:16:36,430 --> 00:16:40,000 Okay, next up, let's talk conditioner, shall we? 329 00:16:40,033 --> 00:16:42,670 Would you like argan oil to strengthen, 330 00:16:42,704 --> 00:16:47,341 or coconut milk to thicken? Hmm? 331 00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:51,646 ♪ ...Back up On the stars tonight I'll keep you warm...♪ 332 00:16:51,679 --> 00:16:53,080 Argan oil? 333 00:16:53,113 --> 00:16:57,050 Yeah. Smart dog. Solid choice. 334 00:16:57,084 --> 00:17:00,955 [song continues playing] 335 00:17:00,989 --> 00:17:04,859 Done. Okay, let's take a peek. Okay. 336 00:17:04,893 --> 00:17:07,962 One, two, three. 337 00:17:07,996 --> 00:17:09,697 Oh, wow. 338 00:17:09,731 --> 00:17:12,634 Look at you, handsome! 339 00:17:12,667 --> 00:17:14,067 Ooh. 340 00:17:14,101 --> 00:17:16,804 It's like I'm looking at Channing Tatum. 341 00:17:16,838 --> 00:17:18,740 Yeah. There's you. 342 00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:20,775 [rustling] 343 00:17:20,808 --> 00:17:23,745 Chloe, whatever you're doing is loud. I'm trying to sleep. 344 00:17:24,913 --> 00:17:26,548 Are you trying to dig a hole? 345 00:17:26,581 --> 00:17:29,049 ♪ I'll keep you warm Near the ocean tonight♪ 346 00:17:29,082 --> 00:17:30,685 Thank you. 347 00:17:30,718 --> 00:17:34,388 ♪ You'll be my love And my guiding light♪ 348 00:17:37,559 --> 00:17:39,594 [groans] 349 00:17:40,795 --> 00:17:44,599 Definitely woken up next to hairier, that's for sure. 350 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:47,035 Good morning. 351 00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:50,905 [groans] No. No morning-after make outs. 352 00:17:50,939 --> 00:17:52,105 [sighs] 353 00:17:52,139 --> 00:17:56,143 Okay. All right. [sighs] 354 00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:58,145 Time to find your person. 355 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,817 -We have 32 pounds. -Mmm. 356 00:18:02,850 --> 00:18:04,552 He's in great shape. 357 00:18:04,586 --> 00:18:06,754 You're a tough guy, aren't you? You're a real tough guy. 358 00:18:06,788 --> 00:18:09,691 Hey, tough guy, how old are you? Can you tell me? 359 00:18:09,724 --> 00:18:11,325 "I'm two years old, yes." 360 00:18:11,358 --> 00:18:12,961 He says he's two years old. Okay. 361 00:18:12,994 --> 00:18:14,227 Isn't that cute? Adorable. 362 00:18:14,261 --> 00:18:16,030 You know what, here's an odd thing. 363 00:18:16,064 --> 00:18:19,499 I don't see any testicles, so he's been neutered, but no chip. 364 00:18:19,534 --> 00:18:22,436 -So two snips, zero chips. -Um... 365 00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:24,606 Did you find him outside of a store with a sign reading, 366 00:18:24,639 --> 00:18:26,574 "No chips, no balls, no service"? [groans] 367 00:18:26,608 --> 00:18:27,809 [chuckling] 368 00:18:27,842 --> 00:18:29,209 Okay. We have fun here. 369 00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:31,478 So what do I do then? What am I supposed to do? 370 00:18:31,512 --> 00:18:34,749 Well, the first thing you should do is get him some shots for worms, 371 00:18:34,782 --> 00:18:38,218 because he was a stray, and that's very common. 372 00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:41,254 And it's also extremely common for humans to ingest them. 373 00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:43,256 So have you checked your stools yet? 374 00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:45,158 My stool? For worms. 375 00:18:45,192 --> 00:18:46,360 Holy shit. No, I haven't. 376 00:18:46,393 --> 00:18:48,029 And maybe for an old Monopoly piece 377 00:18:48,062 --> 00:18:50,364 if you ever shoved one of those up your butt. Jesus Christ. 378 00:18:50,397 --> 00:18:51,866 Okay. All right. [laughing] It happens. 379 00:18:51,899 --> 00:18:53,801 It happens when you're a kid. 380 00:18:53,835 --> 00:18:56,704 All right, well, good luck, pal. 381 00:18:56,738 --> 00:18:59,507 Um, okay, well-- He's gonna be a great dog for you. 382 00:18:59,540 --> 00:19:01,509 The thing is, I can't have a dog right now. 383 00:19:01,542 --> 00:19:03,310 I'm really busy. I'm never home. You're busy? 384 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:04,779 Yeah, work, is-- It's crazy. 385 00:19:04,812 --> 00:19:06,446 It's crazy. So what do you do? 386 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:08,049 Are you like a long-haul trucker, 387 00:19:08,082 --> 00:19:10,183 or you work on an oil rig or neurosurgeon? 388 00:19:10,217 --> 00:19:11,418 I'm a home stager. Ah. 389 00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:13,253 Yeah, for high-end luxury real estate. 390 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,488 It's kind of a big deal, so... 391 00:19:14,522 --> 00:19:16,256 Do you still want her to be your owner? 392 00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:17,959 "Probably not. She seems selfish." 393 00:19:17,992 --> 00:19:20,094 Hey, she's not selfish. She's just busy. 394 00:19:20,128 --> 00:19:21,763 You don't have to talk through the dog. 395 00:19:21,796 --> 00:19:23,865 I can't help it. He's very talkative. Okay. 396 00:19:23,898 --> 00:19:26,400 You know what? That's fine. Don't worry about it. 397 00:19:26,433 --> 00:19:29,504 Don't adjust your lifestyle for anything or anybody. 398 00:19:29,537 --> 00:19:30,437 Excuse me? 399 00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:32,140 Sorry. That was an inner thought. 400 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:35,175 I think you should post on Nextdoor, maybe put up a few flyers, 401 00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:36,878 and if you don't hear anything, 402 00:19:36,911 --> 00:19:39,413 you know, take him to an animal shelter, I guess. 403 00:19:39,446 --> 00:19:41,916 -They'll find him a home, right? -Yeah, probably not. 404 00:19:41,949 --> 00:19:44,384 You might as well get it over with-- put up the flyers, 405 00:19:44,418 --> 00:19:48,022 and then get ready to see this guy in the dumpster. 406 00:19:48,056 --> 00:19:52,527 Typically I wouldn't be outside during a pedestrian hour, 407 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:56,030 or ever, but it's better you pee out here than on my floor. 408 00:19:56,064 --> 00:19:58,800 So, just get it done, and then we'll go-- 409 00:19:58,833 --> 00:20:00,168 Oh, my God. 410 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,804 -Oh, God. Fuck. No. -[dog walker] Hi, friends. 411 00:20:02,837 --> 00:20:05,238 -Chloe, no, no, no, no, no. -[gasps] And who is this? 412 00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:07,775 Uh, she's-- Oh, so adorable! 413 00:20:07,809 --> 00:20:09,110 Come here, you. Come here. 414 00:20:09,143 --> 00:20:10,945 She's, uh, Chloe. Come here. Come here. 415 00:20:10,978 --> 00:20:12,780 Mm-hmm. So adorable. 416 00:20:12,814 --> 00:20:14,082 Oh. Oh! Oh. 417 00:20:14,115 --> 00:20:16,283 -Oh, my God. Yeah. -Such a sniffer. 418 00:20:16,316 --> 00:20:17,652 Whoa. All right. 419 00:20:17,685 --> 00:20:19,286 Um, could you just-- 420 00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:21,889 Okay. Please, um, just-- Thank you. 421 00:20:21,923 --> 00:20:24,158 Hey, we should do a playdate. 422 00:20:24,192 --> 00:20:25,593 Oh, um... 423 00:20:26,561 --> 00:20:27,662 Okay, bye. 424 00:20:28,428 --> 00:20:30,031 Come on, Strawberry! 425 00:20:30,064 --> 00:20:32,432 Chloe, never do that again, okay? 426 00:20:32,466 --> 00:20:35,268 Do you hear me? I was just violated for you. 427 00:20:35,302 --> 00:20:38,606 Your Canva presentation looks pretty dope. 428 00:20:38,639 --> 00:20:39,674 Well, I'm trying. 429 00:20:39,707 --> 00:20:42,143 I really have to impress this guy. 430 00:20:42,176 --> 00:20:44,579 Next, maybe you should make lost dog posters. 431 00:20:44,612 --> 00:20:46,446 Do you think someone's gonna claim him? 432 00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:48,916 I mean, maybe he's already home. Your place is a dumpster. 433 00:20:48,950 --> 00:20:51,586 My place is not a dumpster. It's organized chaos. 434 00:20:51,619 --> 00:20:53,487 Mm-hmm. Oh. Oh. [splashing] 435 00:20:53,521 --> 00:20:56,624 -Oh, your dog. -Hey! Oh! No, no! No, boy. 436 00:20:56,657 --> 00:20:58,559 Oh. [sighs] 437 00:20:58,593 --> 00:21:02,196 Okay. All right. Fine, I will take him out. [groans] 438 00:21:02,230 --> 00:21:04,264 Looks like you got a girlfriend. 439 00:21:04,297 --> 00:21:07,068 [chuckles] Maybe a little. 440 00:21:07,101 --> 00:21:09,336 Yeah-- But no, you know, not really. 441 00:21:09,369 --> 00:21:11,371 Maybe it's time for a real one? 442 00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:13,541 Oh, no. I mean, I don't know. 443 00:21:13,574 --> 00:21:16,309 I-- [laughs] I got a dog, so... 444 00:21:16,343 --> 00:21:18,780 Why? Because you're an ugly loser? 445 00:21:18,813 --> 00:21:20,948 Okay, can we maybe stop with the mirroring? 446 00:21:20,982 --> 00:21:22,617 It kind of hurts my feelings. 447 00:21:22,650 --> 00:21:25,753 Let's just try going out on a random date. 448 00:21:25,787 --> 00:21:30,390 Think of it as an experiment in conquering your anxiety. 449 00:21:30,423 --> 00:21:32,193 You never need to see them again. 450 00:21:32,226 --> 00:21:34,762 This is the next step. 451 00:21:34,796 --> 00:21:38,633 Maybe Chloe can help you with your dating profile. 452 00:21:41,002 --> 00:21:43,638 Back on the prowl. 453 00:21:45,807 --> 00:21:47,241 [shutter clicking] 454 00:21:47,275 --> 00:21:49,644 Ah! Do you approve? 455 00:21:49,677 --> 00:21:51,646 [growls] I'm gonna take that as a yes. 456 00:21:51,679 --> 00:21:54,549 Add new photo. 457 00:21:54,582 --> 00:21:57,819 What do you think? Not bad, right? 458 00:21:59,153 --> 00:22:00,453 Do your magic, Bumble. 459 00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:03,558 Okay. Now we wait. 460 00:22:04,158 --> 00:22:07,094 Nice. Neat. 461 00:22:07,128 --> 00:22:10,731 Reasonably funny. 462 00:22:10,765 --> 00:22:15,102 Currently have a job, at time of posting. 463 00:22:16,070 --> 00:22:18,105 [sighs] I should put some hobbies. 464 00:22:18,773 --> 00:22:20,842 Figurine aficionado? 465 00:22:20,875 --> 00:22:24,045 How about hanging with my fluffy roommate? 466 00:22:24,879 --> 00:22:25,847 Yeah? 467 00:22:27,949 --> 00:22:30,051 This is stupid. 468 00:22:30,084 --> 00:22:35,488 I just want you to know, if I ever manage to actually bring home another woman, 469 00:22:35,523 --> 00:22:38,292 it's not gonna change what we're building together. 470 00:22:38,326 --> 00:22:40,194 [laughing] 471 00:22:40,228 --> 00:22:43,363 No bio. Only an Instagram link. 472 00:22:43,965 --> 00:22:46,567 That's a really deep V-neck. 473 00:22:46,601 --> 00:22:49,971 Why are you posting a group photo? Which one are you? 474 00:22:50,004 --> 00:22:53,541 Oh, my God. This guy is literally in prison. 475 00:22:56,210 --> 00:22:57,745 "Reasonably funny." 476 00:22:57,778 --> 00:22:58,946 [chuckles] 477 00:22:58,980 --> 00:23:02,884 Okay. Oh, my God. Wow. 478 00:23:03,784 --> 00:23:05,152 Your dog is a ten. 479 00:23:06,087 --> 00:23:07,688 Hey. 480 00:23:07,722 --> 00:23:09,957 I'm gonna swipe right on this one for you, all right? 481 00:23:18,199 --> 00:23:19,499 Damn. 482 00:23:20,500 --> 00:23:22,670 This girl's out of my league. [exhales] 483 00:23:23,971 --> 00:23:29,543 But, as a very wise Jedi Master once said, 484 00:23:29,577 --> 00:23:33,648 [imitating Yoda] "Do. Or do not. There is no try." 485 00:23:35,182 --> 00:23:36,449 Yeah. 486 00:23:37,885 --> 00:23:42,023 [sighs] Look, Chloe, you gotta understand, this girl's hot, 487 00:23:42,056 --> 00:23:44,825 and I'm kinda odd. 488 00:23:46,294 --> 00:23:48,195 -No, no, no, no, no, no, no. -[app chimes] 489 00:23:49,697 --> 00:23:53,167 [chuckling] Oh, my God. Oh, my God! 490 00:23:55,336 --> 00:23:57,071 Oh, my God. 491 00:24:00,741 --> 00:24:03,044 Does this mean I have to actually meet up with her? 492 00:24:03,077 --> 00:24:04,578 Whoo-hoo. 493 00:24:04,612 --> 00:24:06,380 She's way out of your league, dude. 494 00:24:06,414 --> 00:24:08,883 -Yeah, man, thank you. I know that. -Well, don't worry about it. 495 00:24:08,916 --> 00:24:10,952 I got a three-step approach that will guarantee 496 00:24:10,985 --> 00:24:13,721 to help you score points on any date. 497 00:24:13,754 --> 00:24:16,991 Trust. 'Cause you already know the ladies I be bringin' in. 498 00:24:17,024 --> 00:24:18,793 No, I don't. 499 00:24:18,826 --> 00:24:21,395 -You heard about my many stories of conquest. -No. What are you talk-- 500 00:24:21,429 --> 00:24:24,265 You're the only person I know from school other than me that's still single. 501 00:24:24,298 --> 00:24:25,800 Take this down. 502 00:24:25,833 --> 00:24:27,668 Step one. Give me my phone. 503 00:24:27,702 --> 00:24:30,271 You'll want to get on the lady's level, right? 504 00:24:30,304 --> 00:24:31,772 Which in your case, 505 00:24:31,806 --> 00:24:33,607 you're gonna have to bring her down to your level. 506 00:24:33,641 --> 00:24:38,478 So you have to neg her to keep her vulnerable with, uh, veiled insults. 507 00:24:38,512 --> 00:24:40,948 That will keep her off guard. Insult her. 508 00:24:40,982 --> 00:24:45,519 So you want to say something like, "Oh, those shoes were hot last season." 509 00:24:45,553 --> 00:24:47,221 I don't know what a season is. 510 00:24:47,254 --> 00:24:48,923 Doesn't matter. She does. 511 00:24:48,956 --> 00:24:51,425 -Step two. Now you broke her down... -Yeah. 512 00:24:51,459 --> 00:24:53,461 ...you want to build her up now. 513 00:24:53,493 --> 00:24:55,262 -[whimpers] -Be specific. 514 00:24:55,296 --> 00:24:57,898 Talk about her nail polish and how that's a great color on her. 515 00:24:57,932 --> 00:25:00,368 Okay, her nail polish. Yeah, she'll love that. 516 00:25:00,401 --> 00:25:02,570 And then comes the physical part. Yeah? 517 00:25:02,603 --> 00:25:03,771 My favorite. Mm-hmm. 518 00:25:03,804 --> 00:25:05,673 You ready for this? Okay. Yeah. 519 00:25:07,408 --> 00:25:08,642 Blow on her neck. 520 00:25:08,676 --> 00:25:10,511 -Just go like this. -What? 521 00:25:10,544 --> 00:25:13,047 -[blows] That's the secret. -What? 522 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:14,281 Yeah. Yeah. 523 00:25:14,315 --> 00:25:16,250 -That's why you're single. -No. 524 00:25:18,052 --> 00:25:21,222 Wait, wait, wait. Slow down. Slow down. You should never rush on stairs. 525 00:25:23,324 --> 00:25:26,761 Do you see her anywhere? Kind of forget what she looks like, to be honest. 526 00:25:26,794 --> 00:25:28,062 Holy shit! 527 00:25:28,095 --> 00:25:29,964 Hey. [dogs barking] 528 00:25:29,997 --> 00:25:31,799 Come on. It's okay. 529 00:25:31,832 --> 00:25:34,635 What the fuck. Jesus! [barking continues] 530 00:25:35,469 --> 00:25:39,607 Okay, come on. I know. That was insane. 531 00:25:40,509 --> 00:25:42,910 No, hey! Gross, gross, gross. 532 00:25:42,943 --> 00:25:45,946 We're expecting company. Disgusting. 533 00:25:45,980 --> 00:25:49,083 [sighs] She's three minutes late. 534 00:25:49,717 --> 00:25:51,619 She's probably not gonna come. 535 00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:53,788 [exhales] 536 00:25:53,821 --> 00:25:55,289 You don't see her, do you? 537 00:25:56,057 --> 00:25:57,324 She's not coming. 538 00:25:57,358 --> 00:26:00,561 Okay, we-- we should just go. This place is terrify-- 539 00:26:00,594 --> 00:26:03,064 That is Chloe, so you must be Max. Hey. 540 00:26:04,198 --> 00:26:05,599 Hey... lo. 541 00:26:05,633 --> 00:26:08,302 -Hi. [clears throat] -[chuckles] 542 00:26:08,335 --> 00:26:11,705 -This must be Channing Tatum. -Yeah. 543 00:26:11,739 --> 00:26:13,307 [imitating Tatum] "I'm not gonna give up on you." 544 00:26:14,442 --> 00:26:16,077 Wait, what? 545 00:26:16,110 --> 00:26:19,113 It's, uh, G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra. Right, right. 546 00:26:19,146 --> 00:26:22,551 Yeah, well, I think he's more of a Magic Mike kind of Channing. 547 00:26:22,583 --> 00:26:25,252 [imitating Tatum] "Do I look like I own tights?" 548 00:26:27,621 --> 00:26:29,090 Uh, yeah. That might be Step Up. 549 00:26:29,123 --> 00:26:31,526 Yeah, I think that is Step-- I don't know. 550 00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,294 Movie confusion. Doesn't matter. Um. so-- 551 00:26:33,327 --> 00:26:34,495 Cool shirt. 552 00:26:34,529 --> 00:26:36,263 Oh, this-- Thanks. It's a band. 553 00:26:38,165 --> 00:26:39,967 [exhales] Your boots. 554 00:26:40,569 --> 00:26:42,103 My boo-- Your boots. 555 00:26:42,136 --> 00:26:45,306 Oh. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They're whatever. 556 00:26:45,339 --> 00:26:46,740 They're really, uh-- really cool. 557 00:26:46,774 --> 00:26:49,610 Um, just, like, uh, 558 00:26:50,311 --> 00:26:52,680 last season maybe? Oh. 559 00:26:52,713 --> 00:26:56,183 Yeah, probably. I got them at a vintage store, so... 560 00:26:56,217 --> 00:26:57,918 Oh. 561 00:26:57,952 --> 00:27:00,754 Nail polish. That's a really nice color. 562 00:27:02,456 --> 00:27:03,824 [chuckles] 563 00:27:03,858 --> 00:27:06,827 -You are "reasonably funny." -[chuckles] 564 00:27:10,532 --> 00:27:11,966 -[chuckles] -Um, anyway, shall we-- 565 00:27:11,999 --> 00:27:12,967 Mm-hmm. 566 00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,002 Ooh. Hold on. 567 00:27:15,035 --> 00:27:16,370 [chuckles] 568 00:27:19,608 --> 00:27:21,275 Well, they seem to be getting along nicely. 569 00:27:21,308 --> 00:27:23,043 Yeah. That's cute. 570 00:27:23,978 --> 00:27:25,746 He's had all his shots, right? 571 00:27:25,779 --> 00:27:29,283 No, no. It's all a government conspiracy. 572 00:27:29,316 --> 00:27:30,684 What? 573 00:27:31,385 --> 00:27:32,853 I'm kidding. [chuckles] Oh. 574 00:27:32,887 --> 00:27:35,322 Of course he's had his shots. 575 00:27:37,725 --> 00:27:39,827 Uh, hey, are you hungry? Uh... 576 00:27:39,860 --> 00:27:43,030 No, it's the best chicken I've ever had. Just trust me. 577 00:27:43,063 --> 00:27:44,999 -Oh, actually, I don't-- -No, no, no. 578 00:27:45,032 --> 00:27:46,901 Just watch the dogs. I will be right back. Hold on. 579 00:27:46,934 --> 00:27:48,369 Check the health rating. 580 00:27:48,402 --> 00:27:51,205 Less than an A means potential for contamination. 581 00:27:52,273 --> 00:27:54,308 What? Make sure it's-- 582 00:27:54,341 --> 00:27:55,510 Yeah. Okay. 583 00:27:55,544 --> 00:27:59,413 Two dogs. Two dogs. 584 00:27:59,446 --> 00:28:01,982 I don't even know this other dog. 585 00:28:02,016 --> 00:28:04,385 Okay, yeah, don't touch the bench yet. Hold on. 586 00:28:05,620 --> 00:28:07,888 [whispering] Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. 587 00:28:11,058 --> 00:28:12,993 -Okay. -Hi. 588 00:28:14,161 --> 00:28:16,397 -Just move that. -Oh, okay, well, I was-- Okay. 589 00:28:16,430 --> 00:28:20,267 All right, rule number one-- do not touch your eyes or you will go blind. 590 00:28:20,301 --> 00:28:21,802 I'm serious. What? 591 00:28:21,835 --> 00:28:23,737 It's ghost pepper. You've never had it before? 592 00:28:23,771 --> 00:28:25,773 -No. -Oh! [laughs] 593 00:28:25,806 --> 00:28:29,578 Uh, rule number, uh, two-- sanitize hands. 594 00:28:29,611 --> 00:28:32,012 Oh. Yeah, sure. Yeah, I got you. 595 00:28:32,046 --> 00:28:35,349 Little bit of-- [squeaks] Okay. 596 00:28:36,383 --> 00:28:38,118 All right. Here we go. 597 00:28:38,152 --> 00:28:40,788 Rule number three-- maybe we just, like, feed ourselves. 598 00:28:40,821 --> 00:28:44,091 -Can you just try the chicken? -I don't really dabble with hot stuff. 599 00:28:44,124 --> 00:28:46,093 Yeah, okay. Sometimes you just gotta try stuff. 600 00:28:46,126 --> 00:28:47,161 Okay. All right. 601 00:28:48,329 --> 00:28:51,432 Oh, my God. Oh, my God, that's so spicy. 602 00:28:51,465 --> 00:28:53,602 [coughs] [chuckles] 603 00:28:53,635 --> 00:28:55,570 My God, that's spicy. 604 00:28:55,604 --> 00:28:57,338 -[coughing] -Are... 605 00:28:57,371 --> 00:29:01,509 Oh, my God. Wait. Wait, wait, wait. Here. Here. 606 00:29:02,644 --> 00:29:03,911 Really? Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm. 607 00:29:03,944 --> 00:29:07,781 [coughing] [chuckles] Here. Here, just-- 608 00:29:08,282 --> 00:29:10,017 Okay. [laughs] 609 00:29:11,352 --> 00:29:14,455 [laughs] Wow. [gasping] Why do people eat this? 610 00:29:14,488 --> 00:29:15,823 Okay, reveal. 611 00:29:15,856 --> 00:29:17,726 Super spicy chicken is a natural truth serum. 612 00:29:17,758 --> 00:29:19,728 -It's really fun, right? -Mmm. Super fun. 613 00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:21,462 Well, let's get to know each other a little. 614 00:29:21,495 --> 00:29:23,063 Okay, first question. Oh, my God. 615 00:29:23,097 --> 00:29:25,799 What did you keep in your high school locker? 616 00:29:25,833 --> 00:29:28,102 Yes, you do. I don't remember. [clears throat] 617 00:29:28,135 --> 00:29:30,605 What did you keep in there, like, all the way in the back? 618 00:29:30,639 --> 00:29:32,273 Magic cards. 619 00:29:32,306 --> 00:29:34,908 You were a nerd. I knew it. Nothing wrong with being a nerd. 620 00:29:34,942 --> 00:29:36,977 Liar. And I didn't play with them. 621 00:29:37,011 --> 00:29:38,812 Eat another wing. Okay. 622 00:29:38,846 --> 00:29:42,082 Okay. Okay, okay, okay. [chuckling] Okay, okay. 623 00:29:42,116 --> 00:29:43,317 [groans] 624 00:29:44,151 --> 00:29:47,421 Okay, it's my turn to ask. [chuckles] 625 00:29:48,088 --> 00:29:50,257 Okay, uh... 626 00:29:50,291 --> 00:29:53,260 Okay. Oh-- Wait, you've prepared questions? 627 00:29:54,495 --> 00:29:56,330 Yeah, I thought it-- 628 00:29:56,363 --> 00:29:57,798 What, uh-- 629 00:29:57,831 --> 00:29:59,601 What's one of your favorite family memories? 630 00:29:59,634 --> 00:30:01,703 -Um... -[coughs] 631 00:30:01,736 --> 00:30:03,837 Christmas, I guess. 632 00:30:03,871 --> 00:30:05,939 Well, you have to give me more than just Christmas. 633 00:30:05,973 --> 00:30:07,776 That's all I got. I'm gonna pass. 634 00:30:07,808 --> 00:30:09,544 You can't pass. That's a boring question anyway. 635 00:30:09,577 --> 00:30:12,212 Yeah, I'm gonna pass. What's your favorite family memory? 636 00:30:12,246 --> 00:30:14,315 -I said I'm gonna pass. -You can't change the rules. 637 00:30:14,348 --> 00:30:18,052 Well, I made up the rules, so I kind of-- I can change them. 638 00:30:20,087 --> 00:30:23,324 -Rules are there to be followed. -Can you just let it go? 639 00:30:29,129 --> 00:30:30,998 Wait, where are the dogs? 640 00:30:31,533 --> 00:30:32,499 Uh-oh. 641 00:30:32,534 --> 00:30:34,602 Channing? [Max] Chloe? 642 00:30:34,636 --> 00:30:37,004 I'm sure they're close by. Chloe? 643 00:30:37,037 --> 00:30:39,139 Channing? Chloe! 644 00:30:39,173 --> 00:30:40,608 [Nicole] Channing? [Max] Chloe? 645 00:30:40,642 --> 00:30:41,609 [toy squeaking] 646 00:30:41,643 --> 00:30:43,410 Channing? Chloe? 647 00:30:45,479 --> 00:30:46,880 Chloe! 648 00:30:46,914 --> 00:30:48,717 Chloe! Chann-- [groans] Shit. 649 00:30:48,750 --> 00:30:50,417 Channing? Do you see either of them? 650 00:30:50,451 --> 00:30:51,720 -I think-- -Chloe! 651 00:30:51,753 --> 00:30:54,355 [giggling] Look. 652 00:30:55,289 --> 00:30:57,659 [Nicole] Channing? Channing? [Max] Chloe? 653 00:30:57,692 --> 00:30:59,393 Chloe? Oh, my God! 654 00:30:59,426 --> 00:31:01,629 -[Nicole] What? -Get away from her, you monster! 655 00:31:01,663 --> 00:31:04,532 [chuckles] Hey, it's fine. He's neutered. They're just having fun. 656 00:31:04,566 --> 00:31:05,966 -Fun? -Come on! 657 00:31:05,999 --> 00:31:08,536 How do we know she gave consent? It's assault. 658 00:31:08,570 --> 00:31:10,904 Hey, it's okay. Calm down. 659 00:31:10,938 --> 00:31:12,473 [groans] It's not-- 660 00:31:12,507 --> 00:31:14,875 She looked like she was having a good time. 661 00:31:14,908 --> 00:31:17,444 [retching, spits] Oh, my God. 662 00:31:17,478 --> 00:31:20,447 -Are you okay? -Do you vomit when you're okay? 663 00:31:20,481 --> 00:31:22,950 No, I mean, I feel bad. Like, do you need anything? 664 00:31:22,983 --> 00:31:26,453 This is your fault. This is all because of your stupid chicken game. 665 00:31:26,487 --> 00:31:28,088 Oh, my-- I'm sorry. 666 00:31:28,122 --> 00:31:29,923 -I was just trying to have some fun. -Oh, my-- 667 00:31:29,957 --> 00:31:31,693 I was trying to get to know you. 668 00:31:31,726 --> 00:31:34,763 So you think burning your throat on lethally spicy chicken is fun? 669 00:31:34,796 --> 00:31:37,097 Really fun! Psycho! 670 00:31:37,131 --> 00:31:38,966 -It's truth serum! -It's truth serum! 671 00:31:38,999 --> 00:31:41,034 I thought you were sweet, if a bit weird. 672 00:31:41,068 --> 00:31:42,604 But you know what? You're a dick! 673 00:31:42,637 --> 00:31:44,572 -Whatever. -Lose my number. Quick. 674 00:31:44,606 --> 00:31:47,307 Okay, gone, deleted it. 675 00:31:47,341 --> 00:31:50,377 [stomach grumbling] Oh, my God. No fuckin' way. 676 00:31:50,411 --> 00:31:53,180 [Channing whining] 677 00:31:53,213 --> 00:31:56,016 What are you whining about? At least you got laid. 678 00:31:56,785 --> 00:31:58,586 Oh, hey, you-- [Max] Holy shit. 679 00:31:58,620 --> 00:32:01,756 Do you know where the bathroom is? [passerby] Over there. 680 00:32:01,790 --> 00:32:02,990 That way? Jesus. Yeah. 681 00:32:03,023 --> 00:32:04,526 Where? How far? Just keep going north. 682 00:32:04,559 --> 00:32:05,693 Is it far? It's a good walk. 683 00:32:05,727 --> 00:32:07,127 It's far? Straight that way. 684 00:32:07,562 --> 00:32:09,196 Fuck. 685 00:32:12,132 --> 00:32:15,235 I can't believe this is happening to me. 686 00:32:17,539 --> 00:32:20,040 Dear God. [groans] 687 00:32:20,842 --> 00:32:22,476 I can't believe I'm doing this. 688 00:32:22,510 --> 00:32:25,814 Oh, my fucking God. Jesus. 689 00:32:25,847 --> 00:32:28,182 Oh, my God. This-- Okay, it's happening. It's happening. 690 00:32:28,215 --> 00:32:32,486 It's happening. No! Fuck! Oh, my-- Fuck. Are you fucking kidding? 691 00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:34,955 -I'm so sorry, Chloe. We gotta go. -[belt unfastening] 692 00:32:34,988 --> 00:32:37,157 [flies buzzing] [groans] 693 00:32:37,191 --> 00:32:39,627 We gotta-- [groans] [diarrhea splattering] 694 00:32:40,762 --> 00:32:42,296 Oh, I'm so sorry. 695 00:32:43,363 --> 00:32:45,466 [Max farts, sobs] 696 00:32:45,499 --> 00:32:47,569 We are never dating again. 697 00:32:47,602 --> 00:32:49,637 Holy crap. 698 00:32:50,404 --> 00:32:51,906 [text alert dings] 699 00:32:51,940 --> 00:32:54,475 ["Growing Up" playing] 700 00:32:56,310 --> 00:32:57,978 [sighs] 701 00:32:58,011 --> 00:33:00,113 I literally-- 702 00:33:01,114 --> 00:33:07,287 ♪ Down the halls Of shy and awkward♪ 703 00:33:07,321 --> 00:33:10,157 Okay, buddy, let's get the hell out of here. 704 00:33:11,492 --> 00:33:16,363 ♪ Without somebody like you♪ Chloe, look what I got. [laughs] 705 00:33:16,396 --> 00:33:19,466 What do you think? Yeah, check it out. Check it out. [babbles] 706 00:33:19,500 --> 00:33:22,336 [woofs] Do you like it? [babbles] 707 00:33:22,369 --> 00:33:24,104 ♪ Every day attached...♪ 708 00:33:24,137 --> 00:33:26,541 Yes, this is where you can dig your hole. 709 00:33:26,574 --> 00:33:27,976 Knock yourself out. 710 00:33:28,008 --> 00:33:30,612 ♪ Wreaking our own kind Of havoc♪ 711 00:33:30,645 --> 00:33:31,679 [Nicole] Okay. 712 00:33:33,180 --> 00:33:35,082 Okay, Channing. Come here. 713 00:33:35,115 --> 00:33:38,218 Come on. Good boy. Good boy. 714 00:33:40,487 --> 00:33:41,923 [groans] 715 00:33:41,956 --> 00:33:45,425 ♪ And joy was the name Of the game♪ 716 00:33:45,459 --> 00:33:46,861 It's a little fish. 717 00:33:46,895 --> 00:33:49,096 ♪ Growing up beside you♪ 718 00:33:49,129 --> 00:33:50,832 Yeah. Good, huh? [text alert dings] 719 00:33:50,865 --> 00:33:52,332 That's yours. It's for you. 720 00:33:52,366 --> 00:33:56,036 ♪ Living out loud every day♪ 721 00:33:56,069 --> 00:33:57,705 [song continues playing] 722 00:33:57,739 --> 00:33:59,106 [shutter clicks] [chuckles] 723 00:34:00,374 --> 00:34:03,310 ♪ Growing up with you♪ 724 00:34:04,946 --> 00:34:06,413 [no audible dialogue] 725 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:09,984 ♪ Careless♪ 726 00:34:10,018 --> 00:34:14,722 ♪ Shortcutting through The wild abandon♪ 727 00:34:15,757 --> 00:34:18,526 ♪ If I was no, you were yes♪ 728 00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:20,995 ♪ You were the dollars To my cents♪ 729 00:34:21,029 --> 00:34:25,833 ♪ If I would whisper You would roar♪ 730 00:34:25,867 --> 00:34:28,836 ♪ Roar♪ 731 00:34:29,671 --> 00:34:32,574 ♪ Oh, growing up♪ 732 00:34:35,877 --> 00:34:39,647 I should have invested in Crypt-Yo stock when it was cheap. 733 00:34:41,549 --> 00:34:44,251 [gasps] Holy shit. 734 00:34:45,653 --> 00:34:47,387 [whispering] Oh, my God. 735 00:34:47,956 --> 00:34:49,524 What is that? 736 00:34:55,329 --> 00:34:57,799 Wait, is this a room just for a tub? 737 00:34:57,832 --> 00:34:59,801 Wow. 738 00:35:03,437 --> 00:35:04,706 Fuck it. 739 00:35:05,873 --> 00:35:09,142 Oh, God. Ooh. 740 00:35:09,176 --> 00:35:12,013 Yep. Yes. This fits just right. 741 00:35:12,046 --> 00:35:14,314 -[owner] Ding dong! -Shit. 742 00:35:15,883 --> 00:35:17,451 You must be Nicole. 743 00:35:18,953 --> 00:35:20,387 Hey. 744 00:35:21,055 --> 00:35:23,390 Hi, I'm Nicole. Hi. 745 00:35:23,992 --> 00:35:25,593 Um... Oops. 746 00:35:25,627 --> 00:35:27,629 I was just, uh, 747 00:35:27,662 --> 00:35:29,831 really getting a feel for the space. 748 00:35:29,864 --> 00:35:31,264 Cool, cool. Do your thing. 749 00:35:31,298 --> 00:35:32,867 I respect your process. 750 00:35:32,900 --> 00:35:34,368 Just wanted to say, 751 00:35:34,869 --> 00:35:35,803 yo. 752 00:35:36,904 --> 00:35:37,872 Yo. 753 00:35:37,905 --> 00:35:39,040 I'm Hunter. 754 00:35:39,073 --> 00:35:42,510 Oh, yeah. I-I figured. 755 00:35:42,543 --> 00:35:45,278 -Want to take a bath? -No, no. I'm good. I'll get out. 756 00:35:45,312 --> 00:35:47,015 -Are you sure? -Yeah, I'm sure. 757 00:35:47,048 --> 00:35:50,150 Because I call this a room for a bath. 758 00:35:50,818 --> 00:35:52,419 Right. Of course. 759 00:35:52,452 --> 00:35:55,389 Did you want to see the rest? Yes. Please. 760 00:35:55,890 --> 00:35:57,692 I show you the world. 761 00:35:59,359 --> 00:36:01,428 This is room for cook. 762 00:36:05,265 --> 00:36:10,138 So, yeah, that is what I'm thinking. 763 00:36:10,170 --> 00:36:12,907 I gotta say, I am vibing this. 764 00:36:12,940 --> 00:36:14,108 Hard. 765 00:36:14,142 --> 00:36:16,010 Yeah? Yeet! 766 00:36:16,044 --> 00:36:22,517 It's the Dalai Lama meets Wayne Manor. But, like, in an authentic way. 767 00:36:22,550 --> 00:36:25,887 That-- That is exactly what I was going for. 768 00:36:25,920 --> 00:36:29,456 Hey, there's this restaurant downtown I'm thinking of investing in. 769 00:36:29,489 --> 00:36:32,660 It's completely inspired by ASMR. 770 00:36:32,694 --> 00:36:34,696 You will eat with all your, uh, senses. 771 00:36:34,729 --> 00:36:39,232 I'd, uh-- I'd love to take you there, get your feel on the flow. 772 00:36:40,601 --> 00:36:42,369 Oh, wow. 773 00:36:42,402 --> 00:36:45,840 Yes, I-- I'm flattered. [chuckles] 774 00:36:45,873 --> 00:36:50,044 It's the ultimate sensory experience. It's rad. 775 00:36:50,078 --> 00:36:53,648 Yeah. Um... i-it sounds rad. 776 00:36:54,182 --> 00:36:56,017 [whimpering] 777 00:36:56,050 --> 00:36:59,486 Hey, what's going on, girl? 778 00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:02,456 Yesterday you were throwing up. Now you want seconds? 779 00:37:04,025 --> 00:37:05,425 [sighs] 780 00:37:05,459 --> 00:37:07,595 Okay, I'm-- I'm sorry, we gotta get ready. 781 00:37:07,628 --> 00:37:12,934 It's time to meet Grandma and Grandpa. And try not to judge me. 782 00:37:12,967 --> 00:37:14,535 We can't choose our parents. 783 00:37:15,937 --> 00:37:17,004 Okay, here we are. 784 00:37:17,038 --> 00:37:19,674 This is the place. [whirring] 785 00:37:19,707 --> 00:37:21,475 Holy shit. 786 00:37:23,845 --> 00:37:27,849 I can't believe you're here, Max. [chuckles] 787 00:37:27,882 --> 00:37:30,283 Here, sweetie, have a cracker. Oh, no, thanks. 788 00:37:30,317 --> 00:37:32,720 -There you go. -Thank you. 789 00:37:32,754 --> 00:37:35,489 I love what you've done with the place. 790 00:37:35,523 --> 00:37:38,226 -It's always a work in progress, yeah. -Mmm. 791 00:37:38,258 --> 00:37:42,295 -Did you see the wind man out front? -Uh-huh. Yeah, he-- he's cool. 792 00:37:42,329 --> 00:37:44,397 Max, you seem happy. 793 00:37:44,431 --> 00:37:46,701 Yeah. Yeah, I am. I'm-- 794 00:37:46,734 --> 00:37:52,339 I mean, Chloe's been helping a lot. You know, she's pretty special. 795 00:37:52,372 --> 00:37:54,075 Yeah, she's a real beauty, Son. 796 00:37:54,108 --> 00:37:56,878 She's got a little meat on her bones too. Like her grandma. 797 00:37:56,911 --> 00:37:58,246 [laughing] [laughs] Stop. 798 00:37:58,278 --> 00:38:00,515 Is she looking kind of heavy? It's weird. 799 00:38:00,548 --> 00:38:03,151 I mean, at first she couldn't keep any food down, 800 00:38:03,184 --> 00:38:05,052 and lately she can't get enough. 801 00:38:05,086 --> 00:38:08,890 Well, let me take a look at her. Here, come to Mama, you sweet girl, yeah. 802 00:38:08,923 --> 00:38:12,325 -Look at you. You're just so pretty. -[all chuckling] 803 00:38:13,661 --> 00:38:15,263 Honey? Hmm? 804 00:38:15,295 --> 00:38:16,664 Could she be pregnant? 805 00:38:16,697 --> 00:38:18,199 [laughing] No. 806 00:38:18,232 --> 00:38:20,001 [Max's father laughing] No, that's impossible. 807 00:38:20,034 --> 00:38:21,736 So she's been spayed? 808 00:38:27,374 --> 00:38:29,010 No fucking way. 809 00:38:29,710 --> 00:38:30,912 [paper crinkling] 810 00:38:30,945 --> 00:38:33,346 All right, pick her up and place her over the bowl, 811 00:38:33,380 --> 00:38:36,383 but, like, in her normal squatting position. 812 00:38:36,416 --> 00:38:38,586 I don't think this is how we do it, man. 813 00:38:38,619 --> 00:38:41,856 It is. I read this is how they do it in Finland. 814 00:38:41,889 --> 00:38:43,691 Finland? What? 815 00:38:43,724 --> 00:38:45,193 Yes. I read, okay? 816 00:38:45,226 --> 00:38:46,961 Don't be uncultured, Max. It's unattractive. 817 00:38:46,994 --> 00:38:49,130 You're the one who dragged me to a drugstore bathroom 818 00:38:49,163 --> 00:38:51,833 to stick a piece of plastic under my dog's vag-- I can't even say it. 819 00:38:51,866 --> 00:38:54,836 I'm trying to help you with your 16 and Pregnant -ass dog, okay? 820 00:38:54,869 --> 00:38:57,672 You could learn something from her. Gettin' laid on the first date. 821 00:38:57,705 --> 00:38:59,640 Can you not be so disrespectful? 822 00:38:59,674 --> 00:39:01,509 I swear I get stupider just being around you. 823 00:39:01,542 --> 00:39:04,612 Hold on, I feel her muscles moving. I think she's gonna... 824 00:39:05,246 --> 00:39:06,914 [farts] Oh. 825 00:39:06,948 --> 00:39:09,550 -Oh, that's vile! Whew. -It's okay. It's okay, Chloe. 826 00:39:09,584 --> 00:39:12,286 -She's probably just nervous. -It's lingering! [laughs] 827 00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:13,486 It's okay, Chloe. It's lingering, dude. 828 00:39:13,521 --> 00:39:15,422 [panting] Hold on. 829 00:39:15,455 --> 00:39:18,358 -Okay. -Oh, she's weeing. She's weeing. 830 00:39:18,391 --> 00:39:19,927 She's weeing. Oh, thank God. 831 00:39:19,961 --> 00:39:22,362 [groans] It's on my finger. Did it get on the thing? 832 00:39:22,395 --> 00:39:24,031 It did. Ugh! 833 00:39:24,065 --> 00:39:25,299 Okay. Here, girl. 834 00:39:25,333 --> 00:39:28,569 I'm sorry. [kisses] Okay, all right. 835 00:39:28,603 --> 00:39:30,403 What? I got good news and bad news. 836 00:39:30,437 --> 00:39:32,405 Well, what's the bad news? 837 00:39:32,439 --> 00:39:35,343 It's the same news either way. It's inconclusive. 838 00:39:35,375 --> 00:39:38,713 That's just no news. So what do we do now? 839 00:39:38,746 --> 00:39:41,148 -You know. -[whispering] I don't know. 840 00:39:41,182 --> 00:39:42,917 If plan A didn't work... 841 00:39:44,218 --> 00:39:47,088 Can you go up there? No, this is your dog. You got it. 842 00:39:47,121 --> 00:39:48,956 I'm too anxious, man. I'm anxious being in here. 843 00:39:48,990 --> 00:39:50,925 Think about it as a growing experience. 844 00:39:50,958 --> 00:39:52,860 Adding to your progress. You got this. Here we go. 845 00:39:52,894 --> 00:39:55,462 Hi. Hi there. How can I help you? 846 00:39:55,997 --> 00:39:57,565 Um... 847 00:39:57,598 --> 00:39:59,901 Do you sell the, um... 848 00:39:59,934 --> 00:40:02,003 [whispering] ...the Plan B pill here? 849 00:40:02,036 --> 00:40:03,104 Yes, we do. 850 00:40:03,137 --> 00:40:04,505 Um... You do. 851 00:40:04,538 --> 00:40:06,040 I mean, we generally do a short consultation 852 00:40:06,073 --> 00:40:08,843 with the patient who we'll be prescribing it to. 853 00:40:09,710 --> 00:40:11,012 Oh, okay. 854 00:40:11,045 --> 00:40:12,313 Um, 855 00:40:12,346 --> 00:40:14,248 I mean, she's-- she's right here. 856 00:40:14,282 --> 00:40:17,118 We're kind of, uh-- Yeah, she's-- 857 00:40:18,286 --> 00:40:20,254 Uh... 858 00:40:20,288 --> 00:40:22,489 He got the bitch pregnant. [laughs] 859 00:40:23,925 --> 00:40:27,762 Oh, yeah. You're the two morons who got the pregnancy test for your dog. 860 00:40:27,795 --> 00:40:29,530 They've been laughing at you for the last ten minutes. 861 00:40:29,563 --> 00:40:31,065 Is that not-- [pharmacist] Okay. 862 00:40:31,098 --> 00:40:33,267 Do you know how inaccessible this kind of health care is 863 00:40:33,301 --> 00:40:35,236 to most people across America? 864 00:40:35,269 --> 00:40:39,707 And you want me to hand it over to you so you can put it in a piece of cheese. 865 00:40:39,740 --> 00:40:41,609 -Um... -Maybe smear some peanut butter on it. 866 00:40:41,642 --> 00:40:43,544 I wasn't gonna wrap it in-- I hadn't thought that far. 867 00:40:43,577 --> 00:40:45,579 Put it in a Beggin' Strip. You know? 868 00:40:45,613 --> 00:40:47,415 No. No. No? Yeah? 869 00:40:47,447 --> 00:40:48,983 What was the plan? 870 00:40:49,016 --> 00:40:51,018 Was this the plan? This was the whole plan? 871 00:40:51,052 --> 00:40:53,955 You were gonna come in, swing hard on the "it's for a dog" angle. 872 00:40:53,988 --> 00:40:57,925 Not even broach a lie that it's for a human woman. 873 00:40:57,959 --> 00:41:02,029 And I was gonna be like, "Yeah, guys. Let's do it." 874 00:41:02,830 --> 00:41:03,664 Uh... 875 00:41:03,698 --> 00:41:05,399 We'd hoped. Yeah? 876 00:41:05,433 --> 00:41:07,500 Why don't we just go snort some fuckin' Adderall? 877 00:41:07,535 --> 00:41:10,338 'Cause apparently I can just grab some stuff off the shelf and give it to anyone. 878 00:41:10,371 --> 00:41:13,908 Okay, I have one solution I can offer you. 879 00:41:13,941 --> 00:41:15,776 We'll go around back, 880 00:41:15,810 --> 00:41:18,813 and I'll give your fuckin' pug a back-alley abortion or whatever. 881 00:41:18,846 --> 00:41:20,581 -Can you do that? -No, I can't fucking do that! 882 00:41:20,614 --> 00:41:22,416 -She can't do that! -Right. Yes, okay. 883 00:41:22,450 --> 00:41:26,486 I can't do that because I'm not a vet. You need to go to a vet. 884 00:41:26,520 --> 00:41:29,857 [whispering] Vets are really expensive, and I could lose my job any day now. 885 00:41:29,890 --> 00:41:31,726 I'm his boss. 886 00:41:31,759 --> 00:41:33,561 That's terrifying. I hope you don't work in anything important. 887 00:41:33,594 --> 00:41:35,596 He's spending a lot of his money on that psychoanalyst. 888 00:41:35,629 --> 00:41:37,331 It's a therapist, man. 889 00:41:37,365 --> 00:41:39,934 -I absolutely don't care about this. -Just letting her know. 890 00:41:39,967 --> 00:41:41,569 -You need to go to a vet. -[Sid] Yep. 891 00:41:41,602 --> 00:41:43,104 And if you can't afford that, 892 00:41:43,137 --> 00:41:45,639 you need to get in touch with the owner of the father. 893 00:41:46,107 --> 00:41:47,575 [groans] Ah! 894 00:41:47,608 --> 00:41:48,843 She's talkin' about Channing Tatum's mom. 895 00:41:48,876 --> 00:41:50,745 What the fuck planet do you guys live on? 896 00:41:50,778 --> 00:41:53,514 It doesn't matter. It's-- It-- The mom to the doggy. 897 00:41:53,547 --> 00:41:55,549 [whispering] Come here. Come here. 898 00:41:55,583 --> 00:41:57,551 Now, get the fuck out of my face. 899 00:41:57,585 --> 00:41:58,786 Yeah. Yeah. 900 00:42:00,755 --> 00:42:02,356 It's a stupid fuckin' idea. 901 00:42:02,390 --> 00:42:04,158 You gotta call that girl, Nicole. That's not happening. 902 00:42:04,191 --> 00:42:08,029 [Hunter] Prepare to experience food with all your senses. 903 00:42:08,529 --> 00:42:09,897 It's really nice. 904 00:42:09,930 --> 00:42:13,567 Yes, it makes you question reality. 905 00:42:19,206 --> 00:42:20,775 Soup. 906 00:42:22,877 --> 00:42:24,278 Oh, excuse me, do you have a-- 907 00:42:24,311 --> 00:42:25,980 [squelching] 908 00:42:27,681 --> 00:42:31,485 Ah! It is now time to enjoy the sense of touch. 909 00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:32,920 Okay. 910 00:42:34,989 --> 00:42:39,160 [gasps] Shit, that's really hot. 911 00:42:39,193 --> 00:42:40,728 It's delicious. 912 00:42:41,562 --> 00:42:44,965 [Hunter] The next course is, uh, smell. 913 00:42:46,967 --> 00:42:49,670 [sniffing] 914 00:42:50,237 --> 00:42:51,672 [sniffs] Whoo! 915 00:42:52,541 --> 00:42:53,874 Delicious. 916 00:42:54,642 --> 00:42:56,143 [whispering] Delicious. 917 00:42:56,944 --> 00:42:57,711 [exhales] 918 00:42:57,745 --> 00:42:59,680 [snaps] [shouts] 919 00:43:01,182 --> 00:43:03,017 [crunching] Mmm. 920 00:43:03,050 --> 00:43:07,221 [whispering] It's salty. It's bready. It's tasty. 921 00:43:07,254 --> 00:43:09,657 [crunching] 922 00:43:09,690 --> 00:43:12,193 Delizioso. [crunching continues] 923 00:43:12,226 --> 00:43:13,327 [Nicole] Yeah. 924 00:43:14,795 --> 00:43:17,832 Hey, are you not vibing this? 925 00:43:19,033 --> 00:43:20,367 Do you want to get some real food? 926 00:43:20,401 --> 00:43:21,836 Yes. Yes, I do. 927 00:43:21,869 --> 00:43:23,637 Well, let's get out of here, huh? Oh, okay. 928 00:43:23,671 --> 00:43:25,940 -Two-piece chicken. You bet. -Thank you. 929 00:43:25,973 --> 00:43:27,908 Thanks for being, uh, cool with this. 930 00:43:27,942 --> 00:43:30,512 Are you kidding me? I love food trucks. 931 00:43:30,545 --> 00:43:31,979 Right? Mm-hmm. 932 00:43:32,012 --> 00:43:35,616 There's something about their transient nature. 933 00:43:35,649 --> 00:43:37,651 You gotta enjoy it while it's here. 934 00:43:39,620 --> 00:43:40,988 That's almost sorta deep. 935 00:43:41,021 --> 00:43:44,091 I'm very deep. Like infinity pool. 936 00:43:44,125 --> 00:43:46,827 [phone ringing] Mmm. 937 00:43:46,861 --> 00:43:49,598 I'm so sorry. This number keeps calling me. 938 00:43:49,630 --> 00:43:52,066 Why can't people just do normal phone calls? 939 00:43:52,099 --> 00:43:54,869 Um, this might be an emergency. Could you just hold on? 940 00:43:54,902 --> 00:43:56,770 -[phone chimes] -Oh, my God-- 941 00:43:56,804 --> 00:43:59,473 -Hey. So, um-- -Um, yeah, I'll just be right back. 942 00:43:59,508 --> 00:44:02,076 What the fuck? I said lose my number. 943 00:44:02,109 --> 00:44:07,281 Well, I can't when you're gonna be a grandmother. [laughs] 944 00:44:07,314 --> 00:44:10,284 What are you talking about, you psychopath? 945 00:44:10,317 --> 00:44:13,187 W-- Wait a sec-- No. No way. That's not even possible. 946 00:44:13,220 --> 00:44:15,756 [Max] No, it's possible. It's possible because it's happening. 947 00:44:15,789 --> 00:44:19,193 That's what's happening right now. It's happening now, so it's possible. 948 00:44:19,226 --> 00:44:21,662 Okay, well, Channing Tatum is not the father. 949 00:44:21,695 --> 00:44:23,197 Well, Chloe hasn't been sleeping around. 950 00:44:23,230 --> 00:44:25,266 Really? She seemed kind of free with herself at the park. 951 00:44:25,299 --> 00:44:27,835 Hold on. I'm sorry. Are you slut-shaming my dog? 952 00:44:27,868 --> 00:44:31,071 Listen to me. Channing does not even have balls, okay? 953 00:44:31,105 --> 00:44:34,141 Hold on-- What do you-- How do you know that? 954 00:44:34,175 --> 00:44:36,177 I think I would have noticed his balls. 955 00:44:36,210 --> 00:44:37,878 And the vet checked, okay? He's neutered. 956 00:44:37,912 --> 00:44:40,047 Okay, well, he has a penis. What? 957 00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:43,984 Yes, of course he has a penis, but you need balls for the penis-- 958 00:44:46,420 --> 00:44:48,623 -I can't do this right now. -You can't do this? 959 00:44:48,657 --> 00:44:50,124 Wait, how come Chloe wasn't spayed? 960 00:44:50,157 --> 00:44:52,226 Yeah, well, she was gonna be. She was about to be. 961 00:44:52,259 --> 00:44:56,030 I was gonna take her to an appointment, and then your mutt mounted her. 962 00:44:56,063 --> 00:44:58,299 -Oh, who are you calling a mutt? -I'm calling your mutt a mutt. 963 00:44:58,332 --> 00:45:00,569 Yeah, well, it's better a mutt than a slut! 964 00:45:00,602 --> 00:45:01,570 [phone beeping] 965 00:45:01,603 --> 00:45:05,640 Wow. [laughing] Wow. 966 00:45:05,674 --> 00:45:07,374 [Nicole] Oh, my God. 967 00:45:08,677 --> 00:45:10,077 I am so sorry about that. 968 00:45:10,110 --> 00:45:13,247 Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill. No worries. 969 00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:17,586 So you were saying that-- I got an early sound bath, so I should call it. 970 00:45:17,619 --> 00:45:20,454 Thanks for hanging. Okay. Um... 971 00:45:21,188 --> 00:45:23,824 Let's get down to work tomorrow. 972 00:45:23,857 --> 00:45:25,326 [text alert dings] 973 00:45:27,995 --> 00:45:29,830 [sighs] 974 00:45:29,863 --> 00:45:32,499 Okay, these puppies better not be yours. 975 00:45:34,301 --> 00:45:35,336 Come on. 976 00:45:36,705 --> 00:45:38,372 [vet] ...or a Monopoly piece up your butt. 977 00:45:38,405 --> 00:45:40,407 It happens when you're a kid. 978 00:45:40,441 --> 00:45:42,810 Uh-oh, look who's here. Hey. 979 00:45:42,843 --> 00:45:44,745 I smell a vape pen. [scoffs] 980 00:45:44,778 --> 00:45:46,814 -You guys ready to solve a mystery? -Mmm. 981 00:45:46,847 --> 00:45:48,182 It's like Scooby-Doo. 982 00:45:48,215 --> 00:45:49,984 I'll be Fred, you can be Daphne or Velma, 983 00:45:50,017 --> 00:45:51,819 and you can be a young Abraham Lincoln, 984 00:45:51,852 --> 00:45:53,655 'cause that's what you look like. 985 00:45:53,688 --> 00:45:55,089 So how did you two meet? 986 00:45:55,122 --> 00:45:56,824 -God. Please, just no. -Can we not do this? 987 00:45:56,857 --> 00:45:58,292 Really none of my business. 988 00:45:58,325 --> 00:46:00,995 But I just have to say, I sense some sexual tension. 989 00:46:01,028 --> 00:46:02,631 -You are mistaken. -Mmm. 990 00:46:02,664 --> 00:46:05,199 Not between you. The dogs. [laughs] 991 00:46:05,232 --> 00:46:10,739 You know what? I think that Chloe does feel a little thicc, with two C's. 992 00:46:10,771 --> 00:46:14,709 I know the lingo. Tell you what, let's get old Channing Tatum up on the table 993 00:46:14,743 --> 00:46:17,077 and we'll see if this is even possible, huh? 994 00:46:17,111 --> 00:46:18,178 Yeah, let's. 995 00:46:18,212 --> 00:46:20,414 -Chloe, come here. -[Nicole] Come on. Okay. 996 00:46:20,447 --> 00:46:22,449 Come on up, pal. There ya go. 997 00:46:22,483 --> 00:46:25,119 Ooh. Well, I'm glad you didn't kill him. There you go. 998 00:46:25,152 --> 00:46:27,087 -You were gonna kill the dog? -[vet] How you been? 999 00:46:27,121 --> 00:46:29,089 -No, just shut up. -[vet] Should we find out what's going on? 1000 00:46:29,123 --> 00:46:31,191 -What's that? -Well, that's his penis. 1001 00:46:31,225 --> 00:46:33,595 And that's a great penis. It's a really, really good one. 1002 00:46:33,628 --> 00:46:34,862 Not that, the-- 1003 00:46:34,895 --> 00:46:37,666 Yeah, the ball-- the ball circle things. 1004 00:46:37,699 --> 00:46:38,832 What are those? 1005 00:46:38,866 --> 00:46:41,135 Oh, fuck me. He's cryptorchid. 1006 00:46:41,168 --> 00:46:43,203 -What does that mean? -In English, please. 1007 00:46:43,237 --> 00:46:45,406 It means that he has two functioning testicles. 1008 00:46:45,439 --> 00:46:47,441 They just never dropped from his abdomen. 1009 00:46:47,474 --> 00:46:49,443 -What? That's possible? -Yeah, it's possible. 1010 00:46:49,476 --> 00:46:52,246 Well, good for you! You're shooting live rounds, buddy! 1011 00:46:52,279 --> 00:46:54,214 -[imitates shooting] All right. -Okay. 1012 00:46:54,248 --> 00:46:56,884 Are you ready for the next segment of The Maury Povich Show? 1013 00:46:56,917 --> 00:46:59,320 -Please stop. -Come on, Chloe, you're next. 1014 00:46:59,353 --> 00:47:00,254 Okay. 1015 00:47:02,189 --> 00:47:06,026 I'd say it's about T-minus 45 days until showtime. 1016 00:47:07,662 --> 00:47:09,531 You two are gonna be grandparents. 1017 00:47:14,703 --> 00:47:15,936 Oh. 1018 00:47:16,437 --> 00:47:18,005 Come on, Channing. 1019 00:47:20,675 --> 00:47:24,813 [vet] Now, if you want a copy of the ultrasound, it's just 49.95. 1020 00:47:24,845 --> 00:47:29,116 [Max] And then she just storms out. I mean, she's an awful human. 750 bucks! 1021 00:47:29,149 --> 00:47:30,685 Thank God you currently have a job. 1022 00:47:30,719 --> 00:47:32,986 I'm sure I can be a single grandfather. 1023 00:47:33,020 --> 00:47:35,055 I'm good with one dog. I can handle five. 1024 00:47:35,089 --> 00:47:37,157 Don't worry. I'll be your godfather. 1025 00:47:37,191 --> 00:47:40,894 [in gruff voice] May your first puppies be masculine puppies. 1026 00:47:40,928 --> 00:47:43,230 I'm so fuckin' screwed. 1027 00:47:43,263 --> 00:47:46,166 [keyboard playing] 1028 00:47:50,003 --> 00:47:55,242 I haven't really written anything in a while, um... 1029 00:47:56,276 --> 00:47:57,945 but you've kind of inspired me, 1030 00:47:57,978 --> 00:48:01,014 so I thought maybe I'd try to write you a little-- 1031 00:48:01,048 --> 00:48:03,183 [keyboard playing] 1032 00:48:03,217 --> 00:48:07,689 ♪ Chloe, little spaniel♪ 1033 00:48:07,722 --> 00:48:10,891 ♪ Nothin' we can't handle♪ 1034 00:48:10,924 --> 00:48:14,763 ♪ Stealin' my toast And stealin' my heart♪ 1035 00:48:14,796 --> 00:48:17,766 ♪ Buddies even when you bark♪ 1036 00:48:17,799 --> 00:48:19,366 Or fart. 1037 00:48:19,868 --> 00:48:21,468 Yeah, fart. [chuckles] 1038 00:48:21,502 --> 00:48:24,471 ♪ Chloe, every day♪ 1039 00:48:24,506 --> 00:48:27,941 ♪ We both wake up Ready to play♪ 1040 00:48:27,975 --> 00:48:31,679 ♪ Never gonna say goodbye♪ 1041 00:48:31,713 --> 00:48:37,184 ♪ To my furry Jedi♪ 1042 00:48:38,620 --> 00:48:40,287 What do you think? 1043 00:48:42,456 --> 00:48:43,591 I'm sorry. 1044 00:48:44,726 --> 00:48:46,326 [Nicole] Does he look sad to you? 1045 00:48:47,227 --> 00:48:49,496 Hate that he misses that hussy. 1046 00:48:49,531 --> 00:48:51,298 Dude, maybe he's bummed 1047 00:48:51,331 --> 00:48:54,034 because you've basically robbed him of the chance to be a father. 1048 00:48:54,067 --> 00:48:58,439 You're like single-handedly perpetuating the stereotype of deadbeat dads. 1049 00:48:58,472 --> 00:49:02,009 Okay, what am I supposed to do? Max is a complete lunatic. 1050 00:49:02,042 --> 00:49:04,879 Well, you're just mad because you kind of liked him, 1051 00:49:04,913 --> 00:49:06,180 and he wasn't into you. 1052 00:49:06,213 --> 00:49:07,882 Oh, no. [scoffs] Please. 1053 00:49:07,916 --> 00:49:11,920 Okay, the guy disinfected a park bench for, like, five minutes, 1054 00:49:11,952 --> 00:49:13,120 like a serial killer. 1055 00:49:13,153 --> 00:49:14,789 Are you really gonna punish your dog 1056 00:49:14,823 --> 00:49:16,891 because the owner of his baby mama rejected you? 1057 00:49:16,925 --> 00:49:19,293 [sighs] Okay, bye. [phone beeps] 1058 00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:23,464 Oh, buddy, what did you get us into, huh? 1059 00:49:23,497 --> 00:49:25,800 I think you're muted. Yeah, you're muted. 1060 00:49:25,834 --> 00:49:28,570 [colleague] Oh, my gosh. Sorry, you guys. [chuckles] 1061 00:49:28,603 --> 00:49:30,939 You would think I would know... [cell phone chimes] 1062 00:49:30,971 --> 00:49:32,473 ...how to use Zoom by now. Okay, sorry. 1063 00:49:32,507 --> 00:49:35,643 Um, so what I'd love to do is just jump into 1064 00:49:35,677 --> 00:49:39,079 the customer survey numbers that came back. 1065 00:49:39,112 --> 00:49:41,248 Um, I know we're just digging-- 1066 00:49:44,519 --> 00:49:45,587 Hey. 1067 00:49:46,921 --> 00:49:48,188 Hey. 1068 00:49:48,222 --> 00:49:49,389 Uh... 1069 00:49:51,225 --> 00:49:52,059 Wow. 1070 00:49:52,092 --> 00:49:53,728 Aw. [chuckles] 1071 00:49:53,761 --> 00:49:55,329 He was a little concerned 1072 00:49:55,362 --> 00:49:57,599 she wouldn't go for him with the cone on. 1073 00:49:57,632 --> 00:49:58,666 So you had him... 1074 00:49:58,700 --> 00:50:01,268 Yeah, just right off. 1075 00:50:01,301 --> 00:50:04,606 But he's been acting strange since before then. 1076 00:50:04,639 --> 00:50:07,809 Yeah, Chloe's had a permanent case of the Mondays. 1077 00:50:07,842 --> 00:50:09,911 Mmm. Look at them now. [chuckles] 1078 00:50:09,944 --> 00:50:12,647 Yeah, they clearly dig each other. 1079 00:50:13,748 --> 00:50:15,884 -Oh, uh... -Yeah? 1080 00:50:15,917 --> 00:50:18,151 Sorry. He wouldn't give it up that easy. 1081 00:50:18,185 --> 00:50:19,587 At least not as easy as she did. 1082 00:50:19,621 --> 00:50:21,088 Ha! 1083 00:50:23,658 --> 00:50:28,696 Oh. Here. It's my half of the vet bill. 1084 00:50:29,697 --> 00:50:30,732 Oh. 1085 00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:34,167 Thanks. Yeah. 1086 00:50:34,201 --> 00:50:35,803 I also found some great podcasts 1087 00:50:35,837 --> 00:50:37,539 about raising puppies on Spotify. 1088 00:50:37,572 --> 00:50:40,374 I can share the playlist I made with you, if you want. 1089 00:50:40,407 --> 00:50:41,709 That's actually really cool. 1090 00:50:43,277 --> 00:50:46,146 Look, I know how long this whole pregnancy thing lasts. 1091 00:50:46,179 --> 00:50:47,916 And I do everything alone. 1092 00:50:47,949 --> 00:50:49,751 And I know how hard it is, and how-- 1093 00:50:49,784 --> 00:50:51,519 Look, I mean, honestly, I could-- 1094 00:50:52,954 --> 00:50:54,388 I couldn't have done the vet visit 1095 00:50:54,421 --> 00:50:56,724 without somebody else there helping me stay focused, 1096 00:50:56,758 --> 00:50:58,693 even if it was you. 1097 00:50:58,726 --> 00:51:01,061 Thanks. I think. [sighs] 1098 00:51:01,094 --> 00:51:02,396 And I've been reading online 1099 00:51:02,429 --> 00:51:04,298 about the mother's emotional well-being 1100 00:51:04,331 --> 00:51:06,466 during the pregnancy and how it can affect the puppies. 1101 00:51:06,500 --> 00:51:10,572 And, I mean, look how happy they are together, so... 1102 00:51:11,405 --> 00:51:14,008 I don't know, what if we, as friends, 1103 00:51:14,042 --> 00:51:16,209 got them together for a few playdates? 1104 00:51:16,243 --> 00:51:17,477 Just until the delivery? 1105 00:51:17,512 --> 00:51:18,580 And, I don't know, 1106 00:51:18,613 --> 00:51:20,782 we can just, like, drop them off somewhere. 1107 00:51:20,815 --> 00:51:23,250 I definitely do not want you sticking around my place. 1108 00:51:23,283 --> 00:51:25,019 Well, yeah, I don't want you at my place either. 1109 00:51:25,053 --> 00:51:26,621 Okay, cool, great. 1110 00:51:26,654 --> 00:51:29,323 Then we can choose some place neutral to let them meet up. 1111 00:51:29,356 --> 00:51:31,124 Does that work for you? 1112 00:51:31,158 --> 00:51:33,595 I mean, I guess we'll be doing it for the kids, right? 1113 00:51:35,495 --> 00:51:37,732 [video narrator] You don't deliver the puppies. 1114 00:51:37,765 --> 00:51:39,067 Mom does. 1115 00:51:39,099 --> 00:51:42,070 Nature takes absolute control of everything 1116 00:51:42,102 --> 00:51:44,906 and it all runs smoothly. But-- 1117 00:51:44,939 --> 00:51:47,474 [cell phone chimes] 1118 00:51:48,576 --> 00:51:49,611 [snoring] 1119 00:51:58,586 --> 00:52:00,755 It's nice to get that cone off, huh? 1120 00:52:00,788 --> 00:52:02,356 That thing sucked. 1121 00:52:02,924 --> 00:52:04,424 Hi. Sorry. Hey. 1122 00:52:04,458 --> 00:52:07,127 We, uh, we got a little lost. Um... 1123 00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:08,596 I've never been here before, so... 1124 00:52:08,630 --> 00:52:12,000 Oh. Hi, Chloe. Oh, she's getting hefty. 1125 00:52:12,033 --> 00:52:13,333 Hefty girl. 1126 00:52:13,367 --> 00:52:15,202 Wait, you've lived here your entire life 1127 00:52:15,235 --> 00:52:16,738 and you've never been to Discovery Park? 1128 00:52:16,771 --> 00:52:18,506 How is that even possible? 1129 00:52:18,539 --> 00:52:21,141 Strangers, bacteria, wild animals. 1130 00:52:21,174 --> 00:52:22,910 But I brought a first-aid kit 1131 00:52:22,944 --> 00:52:25,178 and bear repellent, non-toxic. [sighs] 1132 00:52:25,212 --> 00:52:27,582 Very prepared. All right. Yeah, I try to be prepared. 1133 00:52:27,615 --> 00:52:29,817 I take it you're not a big hiker then, huh? 1134 00:52:29,851 --> 00:52:31,151 No, I can hang. 1135 00:52:33,286 --> 00:52:35,890 Nice cardigan. Thanks. 1136 00:52:35,923 --> 00:52:38,726 I didn't know I was supposed to dress like Danny Zuko. 1137 00:52:39,994 --> 00:52:42,063 This is amazing. 1138 00:52:42,096 --> 00:52:45,566 I could just sit here and chill. 1139 00:52:46,199 --> 00:52:49,302 Yeah. It's my thinking spot. 1140 00:52:49,336 --> 00:52:51,171 It gives me good vibes. 1141 00:52:51,204 --> 00:52:54,174 Well, thanks for sharing your spot with me-- us. 1142 00:52:55,409 --> 00:52:56,878 [sighs] 1143 00:52:56,911 --> 00:52:58,178 You're welcome. 1144 00:53:01,883 --> 00:53:04,317 Oh, shit. What? 1145 00:53:04,351 --> 00:53:06,988 I just finished all my water and I forgot to bring them some. 1146 00:53:07,021 --> 00:53:08,422 Oh. 1147 00:53:08,455 --> 00:53:10,958 I swear, I'm such a selfish asshole sometimes. 1148 00:53:10,992 --> 00:53:12,827 No, you're not. Here, I got it. 1149 00:53:14,194 --> 00:53:15,495 Got it. 1150 00:53:15,530 --> 00:53:17,497 It's BPA-free, don't worry. Oh. 1151 00:53:17,532 --> 00:53:19,567 Of course. I could only assume. 1152 00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:22,103 Here you go, guys! Here you go. 1153 00:53:22,136 --> 00:53:24,371 ♪ Let me go♪ 1154 00:53:24,404 --> 00:53:27,274 ♪ Let me let you go♪ 1155 00:53:27,307 --> 00:53:29,443 ♪ Let me go♪ [knocking on door] 1156 00:53:29,476 --> 00:53:32,446 ♪ Let me let you go♪ 1157 00:53:33,648 --> 00:53:36,751 [song fades] 1158 00:53:38,152 --> 00:53:40,988 Shit, what am I gonna do? 1159 00:53:45,593 --> 00:53:47,427 Okay, make sure you behave yourself. 1160 00:53:47,461 --> 00:53:49,030 He's doing us a big favor. 1161 00:53:49,063 --> 00:53:51,364 [knocking on door] [inhales deeply] Okay. 1162 00:53:52,232 --> 00:53:53,433 -Hey. -Hey. 1163 00:53:53,467 --> 00:53:56,236 Hi. Okay, come on in. [clears throat] 1164 00:53:56,269 --> 00:53:58,906 Um, I'm gonna need you to put this on, if that's... 1165 00:54:00,373 --> 00:54:02,242 Really? Yeah, just in the house. 1166 00:54:02,710 --> 00:54:03,845 Okay. Sorry. 1167 00:54:03,878 --> 00:54:05,880 [grunts] Do it quickly, if that's okay. 1168 00:54:09,717 --> 00:54:13,286 [laughing] I'm just kidding. You don't have to wear that. 1169 00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:14,454 You don't have to wear that. 1170 00:54:14,488 --> 00:54:15,890 Would've been reasonably funny 1171 00:54:15,923 --> 00:54:17,424 if I weren't being threatened with eviction. 1172 00:54:17,457 --> 00:54:19,459 Yeah, no. They gave me two days-- 1173 00:54:19,493 --> 00:54:21,562 You are gonna have to take your shoes off though. For real. 1174 00:54:21,596 --> 00:54:23,531 They gave me two days to decide. Yeah. 1175 00:54:23,564 --> 00:54:26,868 Me or Channing has to go. [sighs] And I'm really sorry, 1176 00:54:26,901 --> 00:54:29,369 I just need a little more time to figure out where to move. 1177 00:54:29,402 --> 00:54:33,141 -Mm-hmm. Yeah. -Thank you for letting him stay. 1178 00:54:33,174 --> 00:54:35,442 Yeah, I mean, it's a big step for me, 1179 00:54:35,475 --> 00:54:36,744 but it's what's best right now. 1180 00:54:36,778 --> 00:54:38,445 You know, for both of them, so... 1181 00:54:38,478 --> 00:54:40,681 [gasps] Whoa. Just gonna have to-- What? 1182 00:54:40,715 --> 00:54:42,550 Wait, is this really from The Godfather? 1183 00:54:42,583 --> 00:54:44,284 Uh, well, technically it is, but-- 1184 00:54:44,317 --> 00:54:47,088 -That is my all-time favorite movie. -Which part? 1185 00:54:47,121 --> 00:54:49,257 Not Part III, that's for damn sure. 1186 00:54:49,289 --> 00:54:51,491 Yeah. Wait, don't touch it! Geez! 1187 00:54:51,526 --> 00:54:53,961 I'm sorry. I just-- I didn't. Just-- 1188 00:54:53,995 --> 00:54:55,362 -You were going to. -Oh. 1189 00:54:55,395 --> 00:54:57,165 Oh, oh, oh. Yeah? 1190 00:54:57,198 --> 00:55:01,401 Will you hook this up to your Wi-Fi for me? 1191 00:55:01,434 --> 00:55:03,137 Just so I can make sure he's okay. 1192 00:55:03,171 --> 00:55:04,739 Uh, well, I can't let you on my network. 1193 00:55:05,206 --> 00:55:06,373 Why? 1194 00:55:06,406 --> 00:55:08,341 I'd have to give you my password. 1195 00:55:08,375 --> 00:55:10,278 And what if you see me in my underwear? 1196 00:55:10,310 --> 00:55:11,779 Mmm. That is not a vision that I need. 1197 00:55:11,813 --> 00:55:13,815 Just please hook it up, just at night. 1198 00:55:13,848 --> 00:55:16,584 Anything else of mine you'd like to take over? 1199 00:55:16,617 --> 00:55:19,854 Channing is used to his things, so this will just... 1200 00:55:19,887 --> 00:55:21,722 -It doesn't have to-- -...get him acclimated. 1201 00:55:21,756 --> 00:55:24,292 Likes them spread out? Wait, where is Channing? 1202 00:55:24,324 --> 00:55:26,459 -I don't know. -Ooh, I bet he's marking. 1203 00:55:26,493 --> 00:55:28,029 You don't think he is, do you? 1204 00:55:30,631 --> 00:55:33,067 [whimpering] 1205 00:55:33,100 --> 00:55:36,336 [Channing barking] 1206 00:55:44,812 --> 00:55:46,446 Really? 1207 00:55:47,248 --> 00:55:50,017 [cell phone ringing] 1208 00:55:50,051 --> 00:55:51,853 What happened? Is he okay? 1209 00:55:51,886 --> 00:55:53,988 [Max] Do you want to just come over and sleep on the couch? 1210 00:55:54,021 --> 00:55:55,323 Really? Are you sure? 1211 00:55:55,355 --> 00:55:57,457 [Max] Yes, he misses you. 1212 00:56:09,303 --> 00:56:11,172 [Nicole] Hey. Hi. 1213 00:56:11,205 --> 00:56:13,674 We having a little family cuddle. 1214 00:56:13,708 --> 00:56:15,375 Aren't we? 1215 00:56:17,778 --> 00:56:21,082 [Max] What's happening? Right. 1216 00:56:21,115 --> 00:56:23,684 Well, I went to the Fremont Sunday Flea this morning 1217 00:56:23,718 --> 00:56:25,186 and I found all this great stuff. 1218 00:56:25,219 --> 00:56:27,722 What-- Okay. Yeah, um... 1219 00:56:27,755 --> 00:56:29,624 Why is it here? 1220 00:56:29,657 --> 00:56:31,659 It's for the house that I'm staging. 1221 00:56:31,692 --> 00:56:34,128 This way I don't have to keep going back and forth from my place. 1222 00:56:34,161 --> 00:56:35,897 It's just for a couple of days. 1223 00:56:37,765 --> 00:56:41,434 But there's a path. I mean, it's a little "zig-zag-y," but-- 1224 00:56:41,468 --> 00:56:43,971 -"Zig-zag-y" isn't a word. -Why are you freaking out? 1225 00:56:44,005 --> 00:56:46,908 You've disrupted my apartment. What does that mean exactly? 1226 00:56:46,941 --> 00:56:50,811 I don't like junk all over my apartment. Or people. 1227 00:56:50,845 --> 00:56:53,446 Um, I can't-- I can't be-- I'm gonna-- [Nicole] Okay. 1228 00:56:53,480 --> 00:56:54,949 Chloe? Chloe, come on. 1229 00:56:54,982 --> 00:56:56,517 Chloe, we're gonna-- 1230 00:56:56,550 --> 00:56:58,451 I, um-- Yeah, I'm just gonna-- 1231 00:56:59,452 --> 00:57:00,821 Chloe, come on. 1232 00:57:03,224 --> 00:57:05,359 Oh, my God. What just happened? 1233 00:57:05,393 --> 00:57:07,929 [Max] I mean, am I crazy? Am I being unreasonable? 1234 00:57:07,962 --> 00:57:09,797 I feel like she's being pretty inconsiderate. 1235 00:57:09,830 --> 00:57:12,967 Who brings a bunch of garbage to somebody else's apartment? 1236 00:57:13,433 --> 00:57:15,770 It's unbelievable. 1237 00:57:17,038 --> 00:57:18,306 [exhales] 1238 00:57:18,339 --> 00:57:20,508 I mean, I know I have some issues. 1239 00:57:28,916 --> 00:57:31,185 Hey, look, thanks for listening. 1240 00:57:33,120 --> 00:57:34,522 All right. 1241 00:57:34,555 --> 00:57:36,824 Sometimes I just freak out. You know? 1242 00:57:39,193 --> 00:57:41,494 [exhales] 1243 00:57:42,530 --> 00:57:44,464 [Nicole] Listen, I'm gonna get out of your space. 1244 00:57:44,497 --> 00:57:45,633 Hey, Nicole, I-- 1245 00:57:45,666 --> 00:57:47,835 This was a really, really bad idea. 1246 00:57:47,868 --> 00:57:51,038 I've messaged some other friends to see if they can take him. 1247 00:57:51,072 --> 00:57:54,775 I am sorry. Um... 1248 00:57:54,809 --> 00:57:59,280 I have my own issues and I'm trying to work on them. 1249 00:57:59,313 --> 00:58:03,483 -Oh. So it's not all me? -That's what I'm trying to say. 1250 00:58:04,585 --> 00:58:07,688 I know rules aren't really your thing, but... 1251 00:58:07,722 --> 00:58:12,226 for me, they're how I get through the day, so... 1252 00:58:12,259 --> 00:58:14,862 Why do you think you worry so much? 1253 00:58:14,895 --> 00:58:17,465 I don't know. I guess I've always just been a worrier. 1254 00:58:17,497 --> 00:58:19,233 Even when you were a kid? 1255 00:58:19,266 --> 00:58:21,535 I used to drive my parents crazy 1256 00:58:21,569 --> 00:58:23,571 with all my thoughts of bad shit. 1257 00:58:24,905 --> 00:58:27,842 It's created a bit of loneliness. 1258 00:58:27,875 --> 00:58:31,846 Yeah, and then I chose to pursue music, which was stupid 1259 00:58:31,879 --> 00:58:34,548 because, you know, it sets you up for a lot of judgment. 1260 00:58:34,582 --> 00:58:36,450 And people really do judge. Yeah. 1261 00:58:36,484 --> 00:58:38,252 Um... [snaps fingers] 1262 00:58:38,285 --> 00:58:41,088 So that kind of messed with my whole confidence thing. 1263 00:58:41,122 --> 00:58:43,224 Yeah, I bet. Yeah. 1264 00:58:43,257 --> 00:58:45,760 Then I met a girl who, uh... 1265 00:58:47,028 --> 00:58:49,163 didn't really care about my issues. 1266 00:58:49,196 --> 00:58:53,634 She seemed to love me for who I was, which was cool. 1267 00:58:53,667 --> 00:58:55,169 Really cool, in fact. 1268 00:58:55,202 --> 00:58:59,340 And I was, um-- I was gonna propose to her. 1269 00:58:59,373 --> 00:59:01,175 Oh, wow! Mm-hmm. 1270 00:59:02,143 --> 00:59:04,979 Until I got COVID. 1271 00:59:06,013 --> 00:59:08,849 Fr-- Um, from her. 1272 00:59:08,883 --> 00:59:12,319 Okay. Which she got from a dude. 1273 00:59:12,353 --> 00:59:13,721 Oh. 1274 00:59:13,754 --> 00:59:15,990 Oh, no! She was cheating on you? Yeah. 1275 00:59:16,023 --> 00:59:21,530 So, you know, I quarantined, um, solo for, like, two years. 1276 00:59:21,562 --> 00:59:23,798 But I actually really liked being alone. 1277 00:59:23,831 --> 00:59:26,267 I'm better off by myself, I've realized. 1278 00:59:26,300 --> 00:59:31,906 But it, you know, perhaps explains my, uh, lameness. 1279 00:59:31,939 --> 00:59:33,741 Max. 1280 00:59:33,774 --> 00:59:36,844 Hey, I do not think you're lame. 1281 00:59:36,877 --> 00:59:37,978 [scoffs] 1282 00:59:38,012 --> 00:59:39,246 Seriously, at all. 1283 00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:42,216 I'm actually really enjoying getting to know you. 1284 00:59:42,249 --> 00:59:43,617 Seriously. 1285 00:59:47,321 --> 00:59:48,756 And I will-- Oh. 1286 00:59:49,757 --> 00:59:52,126 Oh, my God. I-- I'm sorry. 1287 00:59:52,159 --> 00:59:53,928 No, I thought-- No, I-- 1288 00:59:53,961 --> 00:59:56,330 Sorry, I was trying to lean-- No, I'm sorry. 1289 00:59:56,363 --> 00:59:57,631 Don't be sorry. 1290 00:59:57,665 --> 00:59:59,500 I just kissed your chin. Yeah, it's-- 1291 00:59:59,534 --> 01:00:00,768 I should-- 1292 01:00:11,812 --> 01:00:15,550 Look, I'm sorry for taking over your sanctuary. 1293 01:00:15,584 --> 01:00:17,151 No, look-- Seriously, Max. 1294 01:00:17,184 --> 01:00:19,386 It's really nice that you're letting me stay here 1295 01:00:19,420 --> 01:00:22,256 and I will sign a new apartment lease right after the puppies arrive. 1296 01:00:22,289 --> 01:00:26,060 And I can even, you know, help out around the house. 1297 01:00:26,093 --> 01:00:27,495 I can cook. 1298 01:00:27,529 --> 01:00:29,296 That's okay. Okay, probably for the best. 1299 01:00:29,330 --> 01:00:30,664 Um... 1300 01:00:30,698 --> 01:00:33,934 Okay. Yeah, um, all right, offer accepted. 1301 01:00:33,968 --> 01:00:35,002 Great. 1302 01:00:41,742 --> 01:00:44,044 Where the fuck are the towels? 1303 01:00:44,078 --> 01:00:47,181 [sighs] Oh, my God, where are the towels? 1304 01:00:48,883 --> 01:00:51,919 What the hell has she done with the-- Oh, my God! [door opens] 1305 01:00:51,952 --> 01:00:54,188 What? What? 1306 01:00:54,221 --> 01:00:56,056 Get out! What-- Get out! 1307 01:00:56,090 --> 01:00:57,124 Okay! 1308 01:00:57,791 --> 01:01:00,127 Lock the door next time, dude. 1309 01:01:00,161 --> 01:01:01,495 Close the goddamn door! 1310 01:01:01,530 --> 01:01:03,264 [Nicole] What did you say? Jesus. 1311 01:01:04,298 --> 01:01:05,567 -Yeah? -No, no. Go! 1312 01:01:05,600 --> 01:01:08,402 -Oh. You are so confusing. -Go. 1313 01:01:10,371 --> 01:01:13,407 Goddamn it. Okay, guys. Come on, dogs. Go, go! Out. 1314 01:01:13,440 --> 01:01:15,376 [dog barks] Come on. Out, out. 1315 01:01:15,409 --> 01:01:16,777 Go. 1316 01:01:17,579 --> 01:01:20,681 God. For fuck's sake. 1317 01:01:22,750 --> 01:01:24,752 -Hey, Max? -What? 1318 01:01:26,120 --> 01:01:27,421 Not bad. 1319 01:01:35,429 --> 01:01:36,463 Okay, guys. 1320 01:01:37,532 --> 01:01:38,966 Ready? 1321 01:01:38,999 --> 01:01:43,003 No preservatives or fillers or anything artificial. 1322 01:01:46,675 --> 01:01:48,409 That's really good. 1323 01:01:49,810 --> 01:01:53,548 No, this is silly. Look. Channing and Chloe. 1324 01:01:53,582 --> 01:01:58,252 No, I mean, it's good-- I mean, all your art is awesome. 1325 01:01:58,285 --> 01:01:59,954 You ever think about doing it professionally? 1326 01:01:59,987 --> 01:02:02,823 You ever think about doing that professionally? 1327 01:02:09,631 --> 01:02:11,999 Okay, I'm retreating now. 1328 01:02:20,642 --> 01:02:22,109 [plays notes on piano] 1329 01:02:22,142 --> 01:02:27,281 ♪ Take my home And take my things♪ 1330 01:02:28,382 --> 01:02:33,254 ♪ I give my all to thee♪ 1331 01:02:34,021 --> 01:02:37,891 ♪ Take them for eternity♪ 1332 01:02:37,925 --> 01:02:44,765 ♪ Dearest Nicole-y♪ 1333 01:02:44,798 --> 01:02:48,469 ♪ Nicole-y, Nicole-y, Nicole-y♪ Okay, okay. 1334 01:02:48,502 --> 01:02:50,004 All right, all right. 1335 01:02:50,037 --> 01:02:52,106 I get it. 1336 01:02:52,139 --> 01:02:54,643 I wanted to go U-Dub for art and design, 1337 01:02:54,676 --> 01:02:56,477 but my dad got sick, so I didn't, 1338 01:02:56,511 --> 01:02:58,779 and then he died, and now I'm here. 1339 01:03:01,015 --> 01:03:02,049 Okay. 1340 01:03:03,551 --> 01:03:05,085 Okay. 1341 01:03:05,119 --> 01:03:07,087 Thanks for telling me that. 1342 01:03:11,025 --> 01:03:14,028 I showed you mine. Play me a real song. 1343 01:03:14,061 --> 01:03:16,096 No, that's not gonna happen. 1344 01:03:16,130 --> 01:03:17,464 I'm turning it off, actually. 1345 01:03:17,498 --> 01:03:19,033 [imitating Elvis Presley] Thank you very much. 1346 01:03:19,066 --> 01:03:20,901 ["Fever to the Form" playing] 1347 01:03:20,934 --> 01:03:23,705 Hey, I really like your tone, though. Shut up. 1348 01:03:23,738 --> 01:03:25,139 [Max] Shuffling the deck. 1349 01:03:25,172 --> 01:03:26,874 Everyone has their card locked in. No cheating! 1350 01:03:26,907 --> 01:03:28,610 No cheating. Okay? 1351 01:03:28,643 --> 01:03:30,411 ♪ So whether music or madness♪ 1352 01:03:30,444 --> 01:03:33,947 I have not altered the deck of cards. Don't do any funny business. 1353 01:03:33,981 --> 01:03:35,517 [Max] A little bit of magic. 1354 01:03:35,550 --> 01:03:36,950 ♪ We live by one of the two♪ 1355 01:03:36,984 --> 01:03:38,586 Was this your card? 1356 01:03:38,620 --> 01:03:40,054 No way! [Channing barking] 1357 01:03:40,087 --> 01:03:41,422 It was, huh? [laughs] 1358 01:03:41,455 --> 01:03:42,890 How did you do that? 1359 01:03:42,923 --> 01:03:44,693 That's crazy. 1360 01:03:44,726 --> 01:03:46,427 Blow your mind, Chloe. 1361 01:03:47,961 --> 01:03:51,198 ♪ Not a moment too soon♪ 1362 01:03:51,231 --> 01:03:54,401 ♪ Not a moment too soon♪ 1363 01:03:54,435 --> 01:04:00,474 ♪ Should we ration The reasons?♪ 1364 01:04:01,543 --> 01:04:03,277 ♪ Choose a child to ignore♪ 1365 01:04:03,310 --> 01:04:04,345 Uh-uh. 1366 01:04:05,513 --> 01:04:06,581 Really? 1367 01:04:08,082 --> 01:04:10,851 ♪ So I will follow♪ Just put it in. 1368 01:04:10,884 --> 01:04:14,088 ♪ The feeling♪ 1369 01:04:14,855 --> 01:04:18,058 ♪ And sing fever to the form♪ 1370 01:04:18,092 --> 01:04:19,661 ♪ All of my fever to the form♪ 1371 01:04:19,694 --> 01:04:21,696 [vacuum whirring] [barking] 1372 01:04:21,730 --> 01:04:23,931 You should check out the classes we offer. 1373 01:04:24,566 --> 01:04:26,634 Wait. Lamaze for dogs? 1374 01:04:30,471 --> 01:04:33,006 [singer vocalizing] 1375 01:04:35,309 --> 01:04:41,683 ♪ 'Cause the very thing You're afraid, afraid of♪ 1376 01:04:41,716 --> 01:04:44,918 ♪ It keeps you clean But unclear♪ [screaming] 1377 01:04:45,787 --> 01:04:48,623 -Oh, my God! -Whoo! 1378 01:04:48,656 --> 01:04:51,959 Just put it in your mouth. Just put it in your mouth! 1379 01:04:51,992 --> 01:04:55,630 ♪ Is the dirt that you're made You're made of♪ 1380 01:04:55,663 --> 01:04:58,566 ♪ And that's nothing to fear♪ 1381 01:04:58,600 --> 01:05:01,935 ♪ No, it's nothing, my dear♪ Oh, my God! It worked! Oh, my God! 1382 01:05:01,969 --> 01:05:04,706 -[Nicole] Ah! -Did you get it? Did you get it? 1383 01:05:04,739 --> 01:05:05,874 I got it. I got it. 1384 01:05:05,906 --> 01:05:07,509 I got it. Good job, guys! 1385 01:05:07,542 --> 01:05:08,576 Mine's good. 1386 01:05:08,610 --> 01:05:09,844 [cell phone chimes] 1387 01:05:09,878 --> 01:05:15,517 ♪ Maybe I thought it before♪ 1388 01:05:15,550 --> 01:05:22,189 ♪ Maybe that's why I'm at your window♪ 1389 01:05:22,923 --> 01:05:25,860 ♪ Hear me at your door♪ 1390 01:05:25,894 --> 01:05:30,063 ♪ Singing give me some more♪ 1391 01:05:30,097 --> 01:05:32,700 [people chattering] 1392 01:05:32,734 --> 01:05:36,003 ♪ Oh, fever to the form♪ 1393 01:05:36,036 --> 01:05:37,938 ♪ Singing fever to the form♪ 1394 01:05:37,971 --> 01:05:39,139 Happy to see you, man. 1395 01:05:39,173 --> 01:05:40,642 How are you feeling? Yeah, good. 1396 01:05:40,675 --> 01:05:42,042 All right? Yeah. 1397 01:05:44,111 --> 01:05:45,613 I wasn't gonna fire you. 1398 01:06:00,461 --> 01:06:02,597 [Max] Okay. [Nicole] Aw, good boy! 1399 01:06:02,630 --> 01:06:04,164 Good boy! Did you-- 1400 01:06:04,198 --> 01:06:06,500 -Oh. Did you-- -Okay. 1401 01:06:06,534 --> 01:06:07,635 [laughing] Oh, my God. 1402 01:06:07,669 --> 01:06:09,470 How does this even happen? 1403 01:06:09,503 --> 01:06:11,539 -Hold on. I got it. I got it. -[laughs] 1404 01:06:11,573 --> 01:06:14,408 Okay. Hold on, I got it. I got it. [dogs barking] 1405 01:06:14,441 --> 01:06:15,643 Okay, okay. 1406 01:06:16,611 --> 01:06:18,580 Sorry. It's okay. 1407 01:06:19,112 --> 01:06:21,348 Okay. [giggling] 1408 01:06:27,054 --> 01:06:28,523 [cell phone chimes] Oh. 1409 01:06:29,022 --> 01:06:30,491 [Nicole sighs] 1410 01:06:30,525 --> 01:06:32,359 Crap, we're gonna be late. 1411 01:06:32,392 --> 01:06:34,662 Time to go to our class full of dog people. 1412 01:06:34,696 --> 01:06:36,463 Mmm, all right. 1413 01:06:36,497 --> 01:06:38,298 Wait. Are you-- 1414 01:06:38,332 --> 01:06:41,368 You're sure that that won't make you anxious? 1415 01:06:43,170 --> 01:06:45,072 No, I think I'm good. 1416 01:06:54,649 --> 01:07:01,088 Hello and welcome to your first Doggie Lamaze session. 1417 01:07:02,089 --> 01:07:05,225 When I say, "Who let the dogs out?" 1418 01:07:05,259 --> 01:07:08,897 you say, "Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff!" 1419 01:07:08,930 --> 01:07:10,598 This is insane. [whispers] I love it. 1420 01:07:10,632 --> 01:07:12,199 Who let the dogs out? 1421 01:07:12,232 --> 01:07:15,369 [all] Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff! 1422 01:07:15,402 --> 01:07:17,204 I think we can do better than that. 1423 01:07:17,237 --> 01:07:20,173 -Let's get on all fours. -[Max] Wait, what? 1424 01:07:20,875 --> 01:07:21,943 I'm not doing it. 1425 01:07:21,976 --> 01:07:23,377 Who let the dogs out? 1426 01:07:23,410 --> 01:07:26,380 [all] Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff! 1427 01:07:26,413 --> 01:07:32,119 Yes! See, dogs feed on our enthusiasm. 1428 01:07:32,152 --> 01:07:35,690 So we want to show them a lot of positive energy. 1429 01:07:35,723 --> 01:07:40,762 We're gonna start today's class by doing a bit of role play. 1430 01:07:40,795 --> 01:07:42,362 Okay? Fuck off. 1431 01:07:42,396 --> 01:07:47,334 Can one grandparent please adopt the female urination stance? 1432 01:07:47,367 --> 01:07:50,505 Now, this is a common position 1433 01:07:50,538 --> 01:07:55,009 that a bitch will adopt during contractions. 1434 01:07:55,043 --> 01:07:56,343 Okay? 1435 01:07:56,376 --> 01:07:58,078 There. Good. 1436 01:07:58,111 --> 01:08:00,447 I'm gonna go around and check everyone out, okay? 1437 01:08:00,480 --> 01:08:03,551 Quick. You're gonna fall behind. Get up. Okay, all right. 1438 01:08:03,585 --> 01:08:07,154 Okay. I almost stepped on your bitch. 1439 01:08:07,187 --> 01:08:10,858 Oh, well, what a nice couple you are. 1440 01:08:10,892 --> 01:08:12,994 -Oh, no. We're-- -We're not a couple. 1441 01:08:13,027 --> 01:08:14,062 All right. 1442 01:08:14,094 --> 01:08:16,096 -[cracking] -[Max wheezes] 1443 01:08:16,129 --> 01:08:18,165 [instructor] How does that feel? It feels great. 1444 01:08:18,198 --> 01:08:20,434 Mm-hmm. Okay. 1445 01:08:20,467 --> 01:08:24,973 A gentle ear rub and panting encouragement 1446 01:08:25,006 --> 01:08:27,508 when a bitch is having contractions 1447 01:08:27,542 --> 01:08:30,878 can really help calm a laboring bitch. 1448 01:08:30,912 --> 01:08:33,413 So let's all pant together, okay? 1449 01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:37,484 [all panting] 1450 01:08:39,787 --> 01:08:41,154 [instructor] Yes. Yeah. 1451 01:08:41,188 --> 01:08:43,091 See how he's doing over here? 1452 01:08:43,123 --> 01:08:45,627 How are you guys doing? Good job. 1453 01:08:45,660 --> 01:08:49,764 Ma'am, you need to get your crotch lower to the floor. All right. 1454 01:08:49,797 --> 01:08:52,165 [whispering] She said you were being a good bitch. 1455 01:08:52,199 --> 01:08:53,635 Let's try it again. Uh-uh. 1456 01:08:53,668 --> 01:08:57,105 [Max] Did she have to use the word "bitch" so much? 1457 01:08:57,137 --> 01:08:59,007 [Nicole] I actually learned something though. 1458 01:08:59,040 --> 01:09:00,975 [Max] Oh, yeah? We learned something? 1459 01:09:01,009 --> 01:09:04,045 I mean, Nicole, she was dry-humping my leg 1460 01:09:04,078 --> 01:09:06,480 and breathing into my face, asking me to-- 1461 01:09:06,514 --> 01:09:10,350 Heel, heel, heel, heel, heel, heel. Okay, you're not even listening. 1462 01:09:10,384 --> 01:09:11,418 Halt. 1463 01:09:12,086 --> 01:09:13,453 Socialize. 1464 01:09:16,924 --> 01:09:19,393 -Rescue? -Uh, yeah. 1465 01:09:20,094 --> 01:09:21,863 Really? 1466 01:09:21,896 --> 01:09:23,296 Yes, really. Yeah, really. 1467 01:09:23,330 --> 01:09:25,767 Why'd you stutter? Are you lying? 1468 01:09:25,800 --> 01:09:27,035 What? No. 1469 01:09:27,068 --> 01:09:28,636 You don't look like a rescuer. 1470 01:09:28,670 --> 01:09:31,238 What is a rescuer? I assure you, she is a rescue. 1471 01:09:31,271 --> 01:09:32,807 She better be. 1472 01:09:32,840 --> 01:09:34,876 Hey! What's going on here? 1473 01:09:34,909 --> 01:09:38,412 This man is a breeder. Who are you calling a breeder? 1474 01:09:38,445 --> 01:09:41,348 Listen, lady. Back off. 1475 01:09:41,381 --> 01:09:42,482 Jesus. 1476 01:09:44,484 --> 01:09:46,921 A dog's for life, not just for Christmas. 1477 01:09:46,954 --> 01:09:50,124 Yeah, we know. It's fucking September. 1478 01:09:50,158 --> 01:09:51,726 [sighs] 1479 01:09:51,759 --> 01:09:54,629 That was amazing. Yeah, well, we're a pack, right? 1480 01:09:54,662 --> 01:09:58,633 This week has been crazy, but in a good way. In a good way. 1481 01:09:58,666 --> 01:10:01,769 You excited to be a dad? You're gonna do so great. 1482 01:10:01,803 --> 01:10:07,407 Hey, thank you so much for today. That was so fun and so weird. 1483 01:10:07,441 --> 01:10:10,343 Yeah, and thank you. It was a blast. 1484 01:10:23,423 --> 01:10:24,525 Hey. 1485 01:10:25,827 --> 01:10:27,195 Whoa. 1486 01:10:27,227 --> 01:10:31,833 -What? -You just-- You look really, uh, good. 1487 01:10:31,866 --> 01:10:33,266 Thanks. 1488 01:10:37,437 --> 01:10:38,940 Do you want to go out? 1489 01:10:38,973 --> 01:10:40,675 [laughs] 1490 01:10:40,708 --> 01:10:42,176 Yeah, right. 1491 01:10:42,210 --> 01:10:44,612 No, come on. It'll be fun. 1492 01:10:45,245 --> 01:10:46,914 Are you-- Just you and me? 1493 01:10:48,448 --> 01:10:50,118 Uh... 1494 01:10:50,151 --> 01:10:53,621 No, no, no. I'm going to meet Shay. 1495 01:10:53,654 --> 01:10:54,722 Oh. Um. 1496 01:10:54,756 --> 01:10:57,825 And Naomi, I think, later, so I just, um-- 1497 01:10:57,859 --> 01:11:00,661 Didn't want to exclude you if you wanted to come out with us. 1498 01:11:00,695 --> 01:11:03,064 Just-- No. At a bar? 1499 01:11:03,097 --> 01:11:04,431 Yeah. 1500 01:11:04,464 --> 01:11:07,034 -Yeah, no, thanks. -Come on, it'll be fun. 1501 01:11:07,068 --> 01:11:10,470 Somebody's gotta walk the dogs. Um... 1502 01:11:10,505 --> 01:11:14,307 No, just not tonight. I mean, actually I have other plans. 1503 01:11:14,341 --> 01:11:16,611 -I've got some plans, so... -Oh. 1504 01:11:17,812 --> 01:11:19,479 Other plans. Okay. 1505 01:11:19,514 --> 01:11:23,316 -I sometimes have plans too. -Yeah, I get it. 1506 01:11:23,350 --> 01:11:25,920 You've got plans. Have fun with your plans. 1507 01:11:25,953 --> 01:11:29,389 I will. They're real plans. 1508 01:11:29,857 --> 01:11:31,259 Okay, my friend. 1509 01:11:31,291 --> 01:11:32,794 [mutters] Stop saying the word "plans." 1510 01:11:32,827 --> 01:11:35,395 I'll be back later and I'll walk the dogs. 1511 01:11:39,734 --> 01:11:42,003 Thank you for hanging last minute. Of course, babe. 1512 01:11:42,036 --> 01:11:44,639 I can't believe that hermit dude turned down this dime-piece. 1513 01:11:44,672 --> 01:11:46,274 He's not a hermit. His loss. 1514 01:11:46,306 --> 01:11:47,474 He's not. 1515 01:11:49,076 --> 01:11:51,879 Oh, my God. Oh, God. 1516 01:11:52,445 --> 01:11:53,948 [Shay] What are you doing? 1517 01:11:53,981 --> 01:11:56,517 Hunter Fosterini just walked in. Yeah, yeah, I know. 1518 01:11:56,551 --> 01:11:58,385 I saw he texted while you were in the bathroom, 1519 01:11:58,418 --> 01:12:00,254 so I responded with your location. [laughs] 1520 01:12:00,288 --> 01:12:01,989 Goddamn it, Shay, why? 1521 01:12:02,023 --> 01:12:04,292 I thought you'd want a rebound beard since you were rejected. 1522 01:12:04,324 --> 01:12:05,927 Well, I don't. 1523 01:12:05,960 --> 01:12:07,528 Really? You've changed. 1524 01:12:07,562 --> 01:12:10,598 -That's awesome, Nic. Oh! Oh, oh. -Hide me. Hide me. 1525 01:12:10,631 --> 01:12:12,233 Please. [Shay] Okay. Uh, I don't-- 1526 01:12:12,266 --> 01:12:14,535 Ding dong! 1527 01:12:15,570 --> 01:12:16,771 Hi! 1528 01:12:16,804 --> 01:12:18,940 Hey, Nicole. Yo! 1529 01:12:18,973 --> 01:12:20,908 Hey. How are you? 1530 01:12:20,942 --> 01:12:21,976 Are you good? 1531 01:12:22,009 --> 01:12:23,911 No, Nicole. I am not good. 1532 01:12:23,945 --> 01:12:26,280 As you know, I put my house on the market this week. 1533 01:12:26,314 --> 01:12:27,548 Yeah. And it sold. 1534 01:12:27,582 --> 01:12:31,052 For 500,000 over asking, all Ethereum. 1535 01:12:31,085 --> 01:12:33,721 So no. No, Nicole. I am not good. 1536 01:12:33,754 --> 01:12:37,625 I'm fricking fantastic! You did amazing! [cheers] 1537 01:12:37,658 --> 01:12:40,161 A drink for everybody! Tequila, eh? 1538 01:12:40,194 --> 01:12:42,462 [dance music playing] [all cheering] 1539 01:12:44,165 --> 01:12:45,498 Ah. Ugh! 1540 01:12:45,533 --> 01:12:49,070 It went up my nose! [laughing] 1541 01:12:49,103 --> 01:12:51,239 ♪ When I close my eyes♪ 1542 01:12:51,272 --> 01:12:53,774 ♪ You're all that I'm thinking of♪ 1543 01:12:53,808 --> 01:12:56,244 ♪ And when I say good night♪ 1544 01:12:56,277 --> 01:12:58,613 ♪ You're all that I'm thinking of♪ 1545 01:12:58,646 --> 01:13:00,815 ♪ And when I'm driving home♪ 1546 01:13:00,848 --> 01:13:03,351 ♪ You're all that I'm thinking of♪ 1547 01:13:03,383 --> 01:13:08,356 ♪ And when I'm all alone I'm not alone Just need you to know♪ 1548 01:13:08,388 --> 01:13:11,391 ♪ You're all that I'm thinking of♪ 1549 01:13:11,424 --> 01:13:13,060 ♪ Baby♪ 1550 01:13:13,928 --> 01:13:15,428 ♪ Baby♪ 1551 01:13:15,462 --> 01:13:19,466 [Hunter vocalizing] [bar patrons whooping] 1552 01:13:19,499 --> 01:13:21,235 ♪ Come on, baby♪ 1553 01:13:21,269 --> 01:13:22,603 Whoo! 1554 01:13:23,436 --> 01:13:25,506 So, are you from here? 1555 01:13:26,340 --> 01:13:28,376 Are you from here? 1556 01:13:28,408 --> 01:13:30,443 Is your family here? They live here? 1557 01:13:30,477 --> 01:13:33,047 You're funny. I like funny. I'm funny? 1558 01:13:33,080 --> 01:13:34,582 You're funny, yes. 1559 01:13:34,615 --> 01:13:36,951 How'd you get to be so chill? 1560 01:13:38,019 --> 01:13:39,120 What? 1561 01:13:39,954 --> 01:13:41,255 [speaking Italian] 1562 01:13:41,289 --> 01:13:42,924 What? I don't-- Bellissima. 1563 01:13:42,957 --> 01:13:44,025 Oh. 1564 01:13:44,058 --> 01:13:45,626 Beautiful. 1565 01:13:48,229 --> 01:13:51,098 Mmm. [laughs] Oh. Oh, oh. 1566 01:13:51,132 --> 01:13:52,166 Okay. 1567 01:13:52,199 --> 01:13:53,200 [door creaks] 1568 01:13:53,234 --> 01:13:55,603 Shh. [speaking Italian] 1569 01:13:55,636 --> 01:13:58,906 Please be quiet. Don't touch anything. [laughs] Shh. Shh. 1570 01:13:58,940 --> 01:14:01,976 [laughs] It's tiny. 1571 01:14:02,009 --> 01:14:04,278 Charming. Okay, I'm gonna walk the dogs. 1572 01:14:04,312 --> 01:14:06,747 All right. Look, the little dogs! 1573 01:14:06,781 --> 01:14:09,016 Shh. Please don't touch anything. 1574 01:14:09,050 --> 01:14:10,351 No, no, no. [laughs] 1575 01:14:10,384 --> 01:14:11,986 Please. No touching. Shh. 1576 01:14:12,019 --> 01:14:13,821 [shushing] 1577 01:14:13,854 --> 01:14:15,723 [laughs] 1578 01:14:16,357 --> 01:14:18,626 Who is this? What's-- 1579 01:14:18,659 --> 01:14:19,727 Hey. 1580 01:14:20,194 --> 01:14:24,198 Uh, this is Hunter. 1581 01:14:24,231 --> 01:14:25,666 I'm her boss. 1582 01:14:26,466 --> 01:14:28,636 Who are you? I live here. 1583 01:14:28,669 --> 01:14:31,973 This is Max. He's my roommate. 1584 01:14:32,006 --> 01:14:34,308 Ah, cute. Roommates. 1585 01:14:34,342 --> 01:14:37,011 Eh, a little small for a roommate. 1586 01:14:37,044 --> 01:14:38,412 [Nicole] Oh! Oh. 1587 01:14:38,446 --> 01:14:39,947 Hey. Hey, no, no! 1588 01:14:39,981 --> 01:14:42,450 I think I broke a tooth! Give that to me. 1589 01:14:42,482 --> 01:14:44,552 [laughs] Relax. Those are collectibles, man! 1590 01:14:44,585 --> 01:14:48,155 So I'll buy a new one. Buy me a new-- 1591 01:14:48,189 --> 01:14:50,257 Can I talk to you for a second in privacy, please? 1592 01:14:50,291 --> 01:14:52,059 Oh, my-- Jesus. 1593 01:14:52,093 --> 01:14:53,894 Relax. I'll buy you ten, 20. 1594 01:14:53,928 --> 01:14:56,496 Who is this douchebag? Did you seriously bring a guy back here? 1595 01:14:56,530 --> 01:14:59,499 I said I was gonna walk the dogs tonight. I'm just trying to help out. 1596 01:14:59,533 --> 01:15:02,703 You're trying to help by bringing Italian Fabio back to the house? 1597 01:15:02,737 --> 01:15:05,206 Yeah. He's the CEO of Crypt-Yo. 1598 01:15:05,239 --> 01:15:07,074 What the fuck is Crypt-Yo? 1599 01:15:07,108 --> 01:15:08,676 He's the house that I'm staging. It's really important to me. 1600 01:15:08,709 --> 01:15:10,244 You're staging a house for this mother-- 1601 01:15:10,277 --> 01:15:11,612 Hey! No! [screams] 1602 01:15:11,645 --> 01:15:13,714 Hey. Give that back to me right now. 1603 01:15:13,748 --> 01:15:16,283 You can't buy me a new one. It's irreplaceable, you dick! 1604 01:15:16,317 --> 01:15:19,020 Do-- Give it to me. Oh, my God. 1605 01:15:19,053 --> 01:15:20,654 [coughs] 1606 01:15:20,688 --> 01:15:23,257 Max, I'm really sorry. Please don't touch the dogs. 1607 01:15:23,290 --> 01:15:25,259 Hey, no, no, no, no. Pookie. 1608 01:15:25,292 --> 01:15:27,261 Do not fuck with my dog, okay? 1609 01:15:27,294 --> 01:15:32,366 Bro, sit the fuck down or I'm gonna give you a spanking like a little baby. 1610 01:15:32,400 --> 01:15:34,135 Can we just-- Let's not. [laughs] 1611 01:15:34,168 --> 01:15:36,037 -[grunts] -Oh! 1612 01:15:36,070 --> 01:15:37,538 Ah. 1613 01:15:38,739 --> 01:15:42,343 [lightsaber whirs] You like that? Huh? 1614 01:15:42,376 --> 01:15:45,446 Jerker. You want it, huh? 1615 01:15:45,479 --> 01:15:49,450 Bitch pig, huh? Spunk-- Spunk man, huh? 1616 01:15:49,483 --> 01:15:51,218 Spunk? 1617 01:15:51,252 --> 01:15:52,853 -Huh? -Hi-yah! [screams] 1618 01:15:52,887 --> 01:15:53,988 Jesus. 1619 01:15:54,021 --> 01:15:56,023 [shrieks] 1620 01:15:56,057 --> 01:15:57,958 [Nicole] Hunter. Come on, bring it! 1621 01:15:57,992 --> 01:16:00,127 [Nicole] Hunter, this is so weird. 1622 01:16:00,161 --> 01:16:03,364 I think you need to go. Like, it's really time to leave. 1623 01:16:03,397 --> 01:16:04,565 It's time to go, Hunter. 1624 01:16:04,598 --> 01:16:06,600 Good luck with, uh-- [scoffs] 1625 01:16:07,835 --> 01:16:08,869 This. 1626 01:16:12,606 --> 01:16:15,276 Whoo! Whoo! 1627 01:16:16,377 --> 01:16:19,514 Max, I am so sorry. 1628 01:16:19,548 --> 01:16:21,582 Everywhere you go, chaos just follows you. 1629 01:16:21,615 --> 01:16:26,921 Chaos? You mean the things that come with having a life outside of your own apartment? 1630 01:16:26,954 --> 01:16:30,458 Not just reading other people's Yelp reviews. 1631 01:16:30,491 --> 01:16:33,528 You left a bowl of disgusting old milk and cereal in the bathroom. 1632 01:16:33,562 --> 01:16:36,697 Who eats any kind of food in the bathroom, let alone cereal? 1633 01:16:36,730 --> 01:16:38,567 -What are you talking about? -[scoffs] 1634 01:16:38,599 --> 01:16:42,269 Okay, but if we're on the topic of bathrooms, do you know what you do? 1635 01:16:42,303 --> 01:16:46,107 You go in the bathroom, and then you spray that little lavender spritz, 1636 01:16:46,140 --> 01:16:49,076 and it's a dead giveaway for what just happened in there. 1637 01:16:49,110 --> 01:16:51,378 It's called being considerate. Okay. 1638 01:16:51,412 --> 01:16:55,116 And B, you are incapable of turning off a light switch after you've been in a room. 1639 01:16:55,149 --> 01:16:56,750 Okay, cool. That's really fucking cool! 1640 01:16:56,784 --> 01:16:58,385 No, it's not fucking cool. 1641 01:16:58,419 --> 01:17:01,590 Know what else you do that's infuriating? What? What? 1642 01:17:01,622 --> 01:17:03,457 The way that you delicately sip. 1643 01:17:03,491 --> 01:17:05,626 It makes my skin crawl. 1644 01:17:05,659 --> 01:17:09,396 I'm sorry, so I should chug every drink that's ever put in front of me like you 1645 01:17:09,430 --> 01:17:11,899 so I can get trashed and hook up with dirty strangers? 1646 01:17:12,466 --> 01:17:14,068 [scoffs] 1647 01:17:14,101 --> 01:17:15,570 Like me? 1648 01:17:15,604 --> 01:17:17,972 Max, you are such a pathetic loser. 1649 01:17:21,342 --> 01:17:25,279 Well, I'd rather be a loser than a closed-off, selfish asshole. 1650 01:17:27,414 --> 01:17:28,649 Wow. 1651 01:17:35,356 --> 01:17:36,991 -Where's Chloe? -I-I don't know. 1652 01:17:37,024 --> 01:17:39,594 Chloe? Oh, my-- Where's Chloe? 1653 01:17:39,628 --> 01:17:41,395 I don't-- What-- Oh, my God. 1654 01:17:41,428 --> 01:17:43,097 Chloe? Are you fucking-- 1655 01:17:43,130 --> 01:17:44,231 Chloe? Jesus. 1656 01:17:44,265 --> 01:17:46,000 I'm gonna come with you. 1657 01:17:46,033 --> 01:17:47,801 Absolute chaos. No, you just stay here, okay? 1658 01:17:47,835 --> 01:17:49,370 You've done enough. Max! I-- 1659 01:17:49,403 --> 01:17:51,105 [door closes] [Max] Chloe? 1660 01:17:51,138 --> 01:17:53,307 ["The Other Side of Mt. Heart Attack" playing] 1661 01:17:53,340 --> 01:17:54,408 Chloe! 1662 01:17:59,213 --> 01:18:01,148 [line ringing] 1663 01:18:01,182 --> 01:18:03,184 [operator] 911. What's your emergency? 1664 01:18:03,217 --> 01:18:08,989 Hi, yeah, uh-- I guess it's not 911, but my dog is missing and I-- 1665 01:18:09,023 --> 01:18:11,358 Okay, sir, you need to call animal control. 1666 01:18:11,392 --> 01:18:15,162 Sorry, animal control? I'm supposed to call-- Fuck me. 1667 01:18:15,196 --> 01:18:18,299 Excuse me. Have you seen a little dog? No. 1668 01:18:18,332 --> 01:18:20,801 Have you guys seen a dog? A little dog-- A black-- No? 1669 01:18:20,834 --> 01:18:23,771 Fucking-- Chloe! Chloe. 1670 01:18:23,804 --> 01:18:26,774 Fuck. What am I gonna do? [cell phone beeps] 1671 01:18:26,807 --> 01:18:30,711 ♪ I won't run far♪ 1672 01:18:30,744 --> 01:18:32,547 ♪ I can always...♪ 1673 01:18:32,581 --> 01:18:33,548 It's gonna be okay. 1674 01:18:33,582 --> 01:18:34,915 ♪ ...be found♪ 1675 01:18:34,949 --> 01:18:36,317 ♪ I can always...♪ 1676 01:18:36,350 --> 01:18:39,186 [Channing whimpers] Hey, it's gonna be okay. 1677 01:18:39,853 --> 01:18:41,956 [exhales shakily] 1678 01:18:44,491 --> 01:18:47,294 [thunder rumbling] 1679 01:18:47,328 --> 01:18:51,465 ♪ If you need me♪ 1680 01:18:51,498 --> 01:18:55,202 ♪ If you need me♪ 1681 01:18:55,236 --> 01:18:59,574 ♪ If you need me♪ 1682 01:18:59,608 --> 01:19:03,678 ♪ I can always be found♪ 1683 01:19:03,712 --> 01:19:07,348 ♪ I can always be found♪ 1684 01:19:07,381 --> 01:19:08,516 Chloe! 1685 01:19:13,655 --> 01:19:15,055 Chloe! 1686 01:19:17,358 --> 01:19:19,226 [Chloe whimpering] 1687 01:19:20,094 --> 01:19:24,031 ♪ If you want me to stay♪ 1688 01:19:24,064 --> 01:19:27,134 ♪ If you want me to stay♪ 1689 01:19:27,167 --> 01:19:30,504 Hey. Hey, come here. [whimpering continues] 1690 01:19:30,538 --> 01:19:32,507 ♪ If you want me to stay♪ 1691 01:19:32,540 --> 01:19:36,310 ♪ I will stay by your side♪ 1692 01:19:36,343 --> 01:19:37,612 I'm sorry. 1693 01:19:37,646 --> 01:19:40,548 ♪ I will stay by your side♪ 1694 01:19:40,582 --> 01:19:43,585 ♪ I will stay By your side♪ 1695 01:19:43,618 --> 01:19:45,019 He's gonna find her. 1696 01:19:51,458 --> 01:19:52,761 [thunder rumbling] 1697 01:19:52,793 --> 01:19:56,897 ♪ I won't run far♪ 1698 01:19:56,930 --> 01:20:00,934 ♪ I won't run far♪ 1699 01:20:00,968 --> 01:20:04,204 ♪ I won't run far♪ 1700 01:20:05,339 --> 01:20:07,174 [door opens] 1701 01:20:09,744 --> 01:20:11,412 Thank God. Where was she? [Channing barks] 1702 01:20:11,445 --> 01:20:12,880 You're still here? Why? 1703 01:20:12,913 --> 01:20:15,684 I couldn't leave until I knew she was okay. 1704 01:20:15,717 --> 01:20:17,418 Well, now you know, so... 1705 01:20:20,555 --> 01:20:22,823 Okay. Yeah, okay. I'm gonna go. 1706 01:20:22,856 --> 01:20:27,027 Uh, I'll come back later for my stuff. 1707 01:20:28,797 --> 01:20:30,331 I'll see you soon, buddy. Okay? 1708 01:20:30,364 --> 01:20:32,132 He can go with you. 1709 01:20:32,166 --> 01:20:35,336 What? No, you know that I'll get evicted. 1710 01:20:35,369 --> 01:20:38,372 He's not my dog, and I'm not your sitter. 1711 01:20:39,006 --> 01:20:41,509 Dude, seriously? Yeah. 1712 01:20:41,543 --> 01:20:43,844 I've got Yelp reviews to read. 1713 01:20:46,380 --> 01:20:47,981 Okay. Come on. 1714 01:20:48,015 --> 01:20:50,451 ["It Must Have Been Love" playing] 1715 01:20:56,691 --> 01:21:01,428 ♪ Lay a whisper On my pillow♪ 1716 01:21:02,396 --> 01:21:07,101 ♪ Leave the winter On the ground♪ 1717 01:21:08,168 --> 01:21:09,838 ♪ I wake up lonely♪ 1718 01:21:09,870 --> 01:21:11,138 Hey, Chloe. 1719 01:21:11,171 --> 01:21:13,240 ♪ There's an air of silence♪ 1720 01:21:13,273 --> 01:21:14,709 What is this? 1721 01:21:14,743 --> 01:21:18,445 ♪ In the bedroom And all around♪ 1722 01:21:18,479 --> 01:21:20,347 Yeah, I miss her too. 1723 01:21:20,381 --> 01:21:21,448 ♪ Touch me now♪ 1724 01:21:23,083 --> 01:21:25,986 ♪ I close my eyes♪ 1725 01:21:26,019 --> 01:21:28,155 ♪ And I dream away♪ 1726 01:21:31,191 --> 01:21:33,961 ♪ It must have been love♪ 1727 01:21:33,994 --> 01:21:35,530 Do you want to play? 1728 01:21:35,563 --> 01:21:36,865 ♪ But it's over now♪ 1729 01:21:36,897 --> 01:21:38,198 You're not in the mood. 1730 01:21:38,232 --> 01:21:39,433 ♪ Must have been good♪ 1731 01:21:39,466 --> 01:21:40,602 I get it. 1732 01:21:40,635 --> 01:21:41,969 ♪ But I lost it somehow♪ 1733 01:21:44,204 --> 01:21:45,406 Hold on. 1734 01:21:45,939 --> 01:21:47,408 Don't pull. 1735 01:21:47,441 --> 01:21:52,112 ♪ Make-believing We're together♪ 1736 01:21:53,046 --> 01:21:54,549 ♪ That I'm sheltered♪ 1737 01:21:54,582 --> 01:21:55,949 Oh, my God. 1738 01:21:55,983 --> 01:21:57,918 ♪ By your heart♪ 1739 01:21:58,686 --> 01:22:01,689 ♪ And in and outside♪ 1740 01:22:01,723 --> 01:22:03,957 ♪ I turn to water♪ 1741 01:22:04,759 --> 01:22:07,060 ♪ Like a teardrop♪ 1742 01:22:07,094 --> 01:22:09,531 ♪ In your palm♪ 1743 01:22:10,598 --> 01:22:12,767 ♪ Now it's a hard♪ 1744 01:22:12,801 --> 01:22:13,868 Hey. 1745 01:22:13,902 --> 01:22:15,202 ♪ Winter's day♪ 1746 01:22:15,235 --> 01:22:17,705 They want to meet me. They want to meet me! 1747 01:22:21,776 --> 01:22:24,244 ♪ It must have been love♪ 1748 01:22:24,278 --> 01:22:27,981 ♪ But it's over now♪ 1749 01:22:28,015 --> 01:22:30,284 ♪ It's where the water flows♪ 1750 01:22:30,317 --> 01:22:34,121 [Sid] Ah, bro, you were doing so good! Then you lost it. 1751 01:22:34,154 --> 01:22:36,256 I'm not gonna have you go dark on me as a friend again. 1752 01:22:36,290 --> 01:22:39,226 You know how hard it is for men to find friends in their 30s? 1753 01:22:39,259 --> 01:22:41,195 Where I'ma go? Jamba Juice? 1754 01:22:41,228 --> 01:22:44,064 Man, I'm better off by myself. 1755 01:22:44,097 --> 01:22:45,934 I told her everything. 1756 01:22:45,966 --> 01:22:48,736 I told her about getting cheated on, and she goes and does the same thing. 1757 01:22:48,770 --> 01:22:51,972 But she never cheated on you. You just didn't show her how you felt. 1758 01:22:52,005 --> 01:22:53,942 Can you just stop judging me for-- 1759 01:22:53,974 --> 01:22:56,076 Me, judging you? You judge everyone! 1760 01:22:56,109 --> 01:22:58,045 Nobody's never good enough for you. 1761 01:22:58,078 --> 01:23:00,047 That's why you by your damn self. 1762 01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:03,417 The truth of the matter is, you do way better with Chloe and Nicole. 1763 01:23:03,450 --> 01:23:05,820 And you need to be honest with yourself about that. 1764 01:23:05,854 --> 01:23:07,922 You gotta tell her how you feel. 1765 01:23:07,956 --> 01:23:10,457 The chaos of the world is here to stay. 1766 01:23:10,491 --> 01:23:12,560 Bro, just face it. 1767 01:23:12,594 --> 01:23:14,596 Face it as a pack. 1768 01:23:15,996 --> 01:23:17,866 [Shay] How's your furry dependent? 1769 01:23:17,899 --> 01:23:19,868 I don't know. 1770 01:23:19,901 --> 01:23:22,704 I feel like he would be happier with Chloe and Max than he is with me right now, 1771 01:23:22,737 --> 01:23:25,740 and I still haven't found an apartment I can afford that takes dogs. 1772 01:23:25,773 --> 01:23:28,710 Are you really trying to tell me you think that dog is better off without you? 1773 01:23:28,743 --> 01:23:32,279 I mean, maybe everyone is right. Maybe I am selfish. 1774 01:23:33,313 --> 01:23:35,517 I just feel like a fucking mess. Okay. 1775 01:23:36,316 --> 01:23:38,786 I want to say something to you, 1776 01:23:38,820 --> 01:23:42,022 but I don't want you to punch me in the face when I say it. 1777 01:23:43,090 --> 01:23:45,359 That happened one time. Okay? We were five. 1778 01:23:47,762 --> 01:23:49,797 Look, 1779 01:23:49,831 --> 01:23:54,368 since you lost your dad, you've put up some major walls. 1780 01:23:54,401 --> 01:23:56,236 And they may be really cool walls, 1781 01:23:56,270 --> 01:23:59,874 covered in, you know, stained glass and vintage fabrics, 1782 01:23:59,908 --> 01:24:01,609 but they're still walls. 1783 01:24:02,944 --> 01:24:05,445 Babe, you really gotta ask yourself, 1784 01:24:05,479 --> 01:24:07,381 what are these walls getting you? 1785 01:24:09,984 --> 01:24:13,688 [Chloe barks] Who is it? It's so early. 1786 01:24:17,859 --> 01:24:19,426 What the hell? 1787 01:24:27,467 --> 01:24:28,368 Jesus! 1788 01:24:29,704 --> 01:24:30,772 Hey. 1789 01:24:31,706 --> 01:24:34,776 Hi. What? Why are you in a box? 1790 01:24:36,343 --> 01:24:37,512 Hey. 1791 01:24:38,111 --> 01:24:39,581 What are you doing? 1792 01:24:42,617 --> 01:24:45,720 Can you ask your mom if this is an authentic Glengholm? 1793 01:24:45,753 --> 01:24:48,790 Huh? Where is she? 1794 01:24:48,823 --> 01:24:55,128 That is the Rolls-Royce of Swedish whelping boxes right there. 1795 01:24:55,162 --> 01:24:57,431 Only the best for Chloe's delivery. 1796 01:25:00,735 --> 01:25:01,769 Thanks. 1797 01:25:03,303 --> 01:25:05,272 Can we talk? Yeah. 1798 01:25:06,774 --> 01:25:08,610 Look, I-- No, Max. 1799 01:25:09,577 --> 01:25:10,812 I'm sorry. 1800 01:25:12,847 --> 01:25:14,515 I overstepped. 1801 01:25:16,183 --> 01:25:18,185 Especially after everything you've done for me, 1802 01:25:18,218 --> 01:25:22,189 and how you opened up to me about your ex. 1803 01:25:22,222 --> 01:25:23,691 And I'm not-- 1804 01:25:23,725 --> 01:25:27,729 I know that we're not a thing or whatever, but-- 1805 01:25:29,097 --> 01:25:32,033 I mean, it wasn't cool and I really regret it. 1806 01:25:32,066 --> 01:25:33,568 And I'm sorry. 1807 01:25:35,603 --> 01:25:40,407 Well, I really regret not dealing with it better, and I'm sorry. 1808 01:25:42,309 --> 01:25:45,680 What you said was kinda true. 1809 01:25:48,049 --> 01:25:50,417 You were pretty accurate about me too. 1810 01:25:52,053 --> 01:25:55,957 I guess we both kinda got some things. 1811 01:25:55,990 --> 01:25:58,860 Yeah. [laughs] Yeah, I'd say we do. 1812 01:26:04,999 --> 01:26:07,635 I really like having you in my life. 1813 01:26:09,070 --> 01:26:10,303 Yeah, me too. 1814 01:26:15,943 --> 01:26:18,245 Honestly, it's just hard-- [scoffs] 1815 01:26:20,148 --> 01:26:21,716 It's hard to care about someone 1816 01:26:21,749 --> 01:26:24,184 when you know that they can just be taken away from you. 1817 01:26:28,422 --> 01:26:31,125 I'm just scared, Max. 1818 01:26:31,159 --> 01:26:32,459 I know. 1819 01:26:38,700 --> 01:26:40,400 [dog barks] 1820 01:26:42,870 --> 01:26:45,272 [laughs] Are you kidding me? 1821 01:26:46,808 --> 01:26:48,408 [Nicole grunts] 1822 01:26:48,442 --> 01:26:51,211 [Max] I could have helped with the box. [laughs] I got it. 1823 01:26:51,244 --> 01:26:52,947 Okay, Chloe. Go ahead. 1824 01:26:52,980 --> 01:26:55,482 Good girl. Good girl. 1825 01:26:58,218 --> 01:26:59,654 [door closes] 1826 01:27:03,024 --> 01:27:04,826 I thought they looked good there. 1827 01:27:08,863 --> 01:27:09,964 [sighs] 1828 01:27:12,399 --> 01:27:16,637 Oh, my God. I missed you guys so much. [chuckles] 1829 01:27:19,674 --> 01:27:22,076 Can you take your shoes off? Yeah. 1830 01:27:22,110 --> 01:27:23,477 [cell phone chimes] 1831 01:27:23,511 --> 01:27:25,012 [Max] These instructions are in Swedish. 1832 01:27:25,046 --> 01:27:28,348 Yeah, we'll just attach the "golv" to the "vagg"... 1833 01:27:28,381 --> 01:27:30,084 Oh, my God. ...using the "ryka." 1834 01:27:30,118 --> 01:27:31,351 [laughs] 1835 01:27:31,384 --> 01:27:33,521 -Okay, we'll just wing it. -Yeah. 1836 01:27:34,155 --> 01:27:35,656 I can't read Swedish, so-- 1837 01:27:35,690 --> 01:27:38,960 And I don't think it says "vagg." [laughs] 1838 01:27:38,993 --> 01:27:41,763 All right, step one. 1839 01:27:41,796 --> 01:27:46,734 I'm gonna miss this whole roomie sitch after the puppies are born. 1840 01:27:48,770 --> 01:27:49,871 Yeah, me too. 1841 01:27:51,438 --> 01:27:53,808 [people chattering] 1842 01:27:53,841 --> 01:27:56,711 [guitar strumming] 1843 01:27:56,744 --> 01:27:58,112 You ready? 1844 01:27:58,146 --> 01:27:59,714 For what, dinner? 1845 01:28:02,183 --> 01:28:04,185 No. Absolutely not. 1846 01:28:04,218 --> 01:28:06,286 I thought we were just gonna have a casual roommate's dinner. 1847 01:28:06,319 --> 01:28:10,625 Max, you helped me fill out my U-Dub app. This is me pushing you. 1848 01:28:10,658 --> 01:28:14,262 All right, I don't want to be pushed to do this. 1849 01:28:14,327 --> 01:28:15,863 Max, you are doing so good. 1850 01:28:15,897 --> 01:28:18,298 But I don't-- This would ruin everything. Seriously. 1851 01:28:18,331 --> 01:28:21,169 What if something happens to me? What if this is my last night alive? 1852 01:28:21,202 --> 01:28:22,837 Why do you have to go so dark? 1853 01:28:22,870 --> 01:28:26,007 Because I figured out that it makes you do what we both want. 1854 01:28:26,841 --> 01:28:27,809 Come on. 1855 01:28:28,910 --> 01:28:30,111 We can watch. 1856 01:28:30,144 --> 01:28:31,813 [person singing] 1857 01:28:31,846 --> 01:28:33,681 [employee] Hey, guys, how's it going? Sign up right here. 1858 01:28:33,714 --> 01:28:36,951 Do not sign me up. I'm not doing it if they call me. 1859 01:28:38,653 --> 01:28:40,054 Sorry. Sorry. 1860 01:28:40,087 --> 01:28:43,057 ♪ Stay tuned, stay tuned♪ 1861 01:28:43,090 --> 01:28:45,159 What is this guy? It's great. 1862 01:28:45,193 --> 01:28:49,664 This is not normal. This isn't right. This guy's insane. 1863 01:28:49,697 --> 01:28:52,399 He's gotta be, like, professional or something. 1864 01:28:52,432 --> 01:28:56,204 -Hey, you're gonna be fine. -This is his concert. This is not open-- 1865 01:28:56,237 --> 01:28:58,039 [crowd cheering, applauding] 1866 01:28:58,072 --> 01:28:59,874 [emcee] That was spectacular. 1867 01:28:59,907 --> 01:29:02,375 I would not want to follow that, people! That was-- [mimics explosion] 1868 01:29:02,409 --> 01:29:04,045 [whistling, cheering] 1869 01:29:04,078 --> 01:29:05,713 Next up we have... 1870 01:29:06,280 --> 01:29:07,748 Max Stevenson. 1871 01:29:07,782 --> 01:29:10,852 No. No. I just got here. Whoo! 1872 01:29:10,885 --> 01:29:12,485 Hey. Hey. 1873 01:29:12,520 --> 01:29:14,487 I fucking can't. I'm not kidding. Listen. [shushes] 1874 01:29:14,522 --> 01:29:17,859 Look me in the eye. Just imagine that it's me and Chloe and Channing Tatum. 1875 01:29:17,892 --> 01:29:20,328 [emcee] Max Stevenson. Come on. Let's go! Okay? 1876 01:29:20,360 --> 01:29:21,428 [applause continues] 1877 01:29:21,461 --> 01:29:23,164 You're ready for this. 1878 01:29:23,197 --> 01:29:24,899 -Come on. -Go. 1879 01:29:25,465 --> 01:29:26,968 [whooping, applauding] 1880 01:29:27,001 --> 01:29:28,435 Oh, God. 1881 01:29:28,468 --> 01:29:32,173 -Whoo-hoo! -[cheering, applauding continues] 1882 01:29:32,206 --> 01:29:34,175 [cheering, applause fades] 1883 01:29:34,208 --> 01:29:37,011 Hi, I'm Max. 1884 01:29:37,545 --> 01:29:39,847 I'm gonna sing a song. 1885 01:29:41,215 --> 01:29:42,884 A song I like. 1886 01:29:42,917 --> 01:29:44,151 [Max clears throat] 1887 01:29:46,854 --> 01:29:48,556 [plays piano note] 1888 01:29:57,765 --> 01:30:01,769 ♪ All through the night♪ 1889 01:30:01,802 --> 01:30:07,008 ♪ I'll be awake And I'll be with you♪ 1890 01:30:08,709 --> 01:30:13,080 ♪ All through the night♪ 1891 01:30:13,114 --> 01:30:15,983 ♪ This precious time♪ 1892 01:30:16,017 --> 01:30:18,886 ♪ When time is new♪ 1893 01:30:20,521 --> 01:30:25,425 ♪ All, all through the night♪ 1894 01:30:25,458 --> 01:30:27,528 ♪ Today♪ 1895 01:30:28,729 --> 01:30:32,300 ♪ Knowin' that We feel the same♪ 1896 01:30:32,333 --> 01:30:35,236 ♪ Without sayin'♪ 1897 01:30:35,269 --> 01:30:36,370 ♪ The same♪ 1898 01:30:36,404 --> 01:30:39,740 ♪ Without sayin'♪ 1899 01:30:43,411 --> 01:30:46,180 ♪ We have no past♪ 1900 01:30:46,213 --> 01:30:47,982 ♪ We won't reach back♪ 1901 01:30:48,015 --> 01:30:53,554 ♪ Keep with me forward All through the night♪ 1902 01:30:53,587 --> 01:30:56,157 ♪ And once we start♪ 1903 01:30:56,190 --> 01:30:58,192 ♪ The meter clicks♪ 1904 01:30:58,225 --> 01:31:03,164 ♪ And it goes running All through the night♪ 1905 01:31:03,197 --> 01:31:05,498 ♪ Until it ends♪ 1906 01:31:05,533 --> 01:31:11,504 ♪ There is no end♪ 1907 01:31:13,307 --> 01:31:17,545 ♪ All through the night♪ 1908 01:31:17,578 --> 01:31:20,214 ♪ Stray dog is crying♪ 1909 01:31:20,247 --> 01:31:23,651 ♪ So stray dog sings back♪ 1910 01:31:24,986 --> 01:31:26,787 ♪ Oh♪ 1911 01:31:26,821 --> 01:31:32,626 ♪ Under those White street lamps♪ 1912 01:31:32,660 --> 01:31:38,199 ♪ There is a little chance They may see it♪ 1913 01:31:39,200 --> 01:31:43,704 ♪ A chance they may see it♪ 1914 01:31:45,673 --> 01:31:51,979 ♪ Stay with me All through the night♪ 1915 01:31:52,513 --> 01:31:54,648 [applause] 1916 01:31:54,682 --> 01:31:58,886 -[cheering, whistling] -[audience member] Yeah! 1917 01:32:05,893 --> 01:32:06,761 [exhales] 1918 01:32:06,794 --> 01:32:08,396 Good boy. Good boy. Okay. 1919 01:32:08,429 --> 01:32:09,663 You ready for your interview? 1920 01:32:09,697 --> 01:32:11,298 Yeah. [Max] Yeah? 1921 01:32:11,332 --> 01:32:13,267 Aw. [chuckles] 1922 01:32:13,300 --> 01:32:15,469 That's so sweet. Thank you, guys. 1923 01:32:15,503 --> 01:32:19,173 Are you sure you don't mind driving me? I'm, like, really nervous. 1924 01:32:19,206 --> 01:32:22,410 Yeah, of course. We're your emotional support mammals. 1925 01:32:22,443 --> 01:32:23,978 Get off her. Yes. [laughs] 1926 01:32:24,011 --> 01:32:25,079 All right, road trip. 1927 01:32:25,112 --> 01:32:26,680 You're gonna do so great. 1928 01:32:26,714 --> 01:32:28,682 They're lucky they get to meet with you. 1929 01:32:30,418 --> 01:32:32,386 [sniffs] 1930 01:32:32,420 --> 01:32:33,988 Do you smell something funny? 1931 01:32:35,256 --> 01:32:36,857 What? No. Oh, man. 1932 01:32:36,891 --> 01:32:39,326 What? I think one of them peed. 1933 01:32:39,360 --> 01:32:40,961 In the car? 1934 01:32:40,995 --> 01:32:43,931 I knew I should have just got plastic covers for the seats. 1935 01:32:43,964 --> 01:32:47,368 I think it was Chloe. She went on the carpet last night too. 1936 01:32:47,401 --> 01:32:48,869 You didn't tell me that. 1937 01:32:48,903 --> 01:32:52,106 Did you-- Yes, I used the Nature's Miracle. 1938 01:32:52,139 --> 01:32:55,142 [Chloe panting, yelps] 1939 01:32:55,176 --> 01:32:58,746 What's going on back there? I don't know. They're getting zoomies. 1940 01:32:58,779 --> 01:33:01,449 -Can we please be respectful of the seats? -[Chloe whines] 1941 01:33:01,482 --> 01:33:03,951 [Nicole] She keeps licking her hoo-ha. 1942 01:33:03,984 --> 01:33:05,753 What do you mean? Oh, my God. 1943 01:33:05,786 --> 01:33:07,421 I think that she might be in labor. 1944 01:33:07,455 --> 01:33:09,123 No! Yeah! 1945 01:33:09,156 --> 01:33:11,258 I don't think that that was pee. I think that her water broke. 1946 01:33:11,292 --> 01:33:14,195 She's not due for three days! Yeah, but it's not an exact science. 1947 01:33:14,228 --> 01:33:17,898 Shit, we gotta get to a vet. What do you mean, a vet? What about your interview? 1948 01:33:17,932 --> 01:33:19,767 A premature delivery can be really dangerous. 1949 01:33:19,800 --> 01:33:21,669 We gotta go, like, right now! 1950 01:33:21,702 --> 01:33:24,171 -Okay, okay, okay, okay. -Where are we even going? 1951 01:33:24,205 --> 01:33:25,606 Google something! I am. 1952 01:33:25,639 --> 01:33:27,074 [car horn honks] 1953 01:33:27,108 --> 01:33:28,976 Is she okay? She's still licking her hoo-ha. 1954 01:33:29,009 --> 01:33:31,979 Is her hoo-ha okay? And can we please use proper terms? 1955 01:33:32,012 --> 01:33:33,848 She's about to give birth. We need to be technical. 1956 01:33:33,881 --> 01:33:36,183 Okay, technically, she is licking her vulva. 1957 01:33:36,217 --> 01:33:38,587 -I want to try that spot. -[Max] Nicole! 1958 01:33:38,619 --> 01:33:39,954 Okay! Wait. 1959 01:33:40,621 --> 01:33:42,289 Wait. Okay, turn right. Now. 1960 01:33:44,559 --> 01:33:46,727 Very good. I think we made a wrong turn. 1961 01:33:46,760 --> 01:33:49,396 -What? Is she okay? -Well, she's-- 1962 01:33:49,430 --> 01:33:51,966 [Nicole] Oh, my God! It's happening! 1963 01:33:52,433 --> 01:33:53,901 Okay, let's go! 1964 01:33:53,934 --> 01:33:56,303 -[retches] -Why are you puking? 1965 01:33:56,337 --> 01:33:58,072 Get the gloves out of the glove box! Okay. 1966 01:33:58,105 --> 01:33:59,974 -Wait. Where are they? -In the glove box! 1967 01:34:00,007 --> 01:34:01,809 -Do you need a ginger ale? -I don't need a ginger ale! 1968 01:34:01,842 --> 01:34:02,910 -Something bubbly? -Good girl. 1969 01:34:02,943 --> 01:34:04,645 Get the blanket and lay it out. 1970 01:34:04,678 --> 01:34:06,747 -Come on. Lay it out! Here. -Okay, I got it. 1971 01:34:06,780 --> 01:34:07,815 Put the blanket down. Okay. 1972 01:34:07,848 --> 01:34:09,416 Wait, pull up YouTube. 1973 01:34:09,450 --> 01:34:11,318 [whistle blowing] What are you doing? 1974 01:34:11,352 --> 01:34:13,387 Nothing. The dogs are tired. Just nap time. Sleepy time. 1975 01:34:13,420 --> 01:34:15,389 Nap time. Go ahead. It's probably your nap time now. 1976 01:34:15,422 --> 01:34:17,526 [video narrator] The female hyena's birth canal... 1977 01:34:17,559 --> 01:34:18,792 That's the best you could find? 1978 01:34:18,826 --> 01:34:20,361 ...is only an inch in diameter... 1979 01:34:20,394 --> 01:34:22,763 You can't do that here. Recess starts in two minutes. 1980 01:34:22,796 --> 01:34:24,633 We didn't seek out the most idyllic birthing spot! 1981 01:34:24,665 --> 01:34:27,434 -But there's children. -They're about to get a biology lesson! 1982 01:34:27,468 --> 01:34:31,839 You're, like, at a ten. Bring it down. What the teacher said. Like-- 1983 01:34:31,872 --> 01:34:33,207 Ha! 1984 01:34:33,240 --> 01:34:34,975 I knew you were a breeder! 1985 01:34:35,009 --> 01:34:36,545 [both] Fuck off! [teacher] Language! 1986 01:34:36,578 --> 01:34:37,878 -Where did she come from? -I don't know. 1987 01:34:37,912 --> 01:34:39,548 It's happening. She's crowning. 1988 01:34:39,581 --> 01:34:41,682 That's gross! [Nicole] Holy shit. 1989 01:34:41,715 --> 01:34:42,917 It's coming! Oh, my God. 1990 01:34:42,950 --> 01:34:45,554 It's coming! It's happening. 1991 01:34:45,587 --> 01:34:46,854 [children shouting] 1992 01:34:46,887 --> 01:34:48,923 Oh, my God. That's like-- 1993 01:34:48,956 --> 01:34:50,758 Oh, my God. That's a puppy. 1994 01:34:50,791 --> 01:34:53,260 Oh, my God. That's a puppy. That's a puppy head. 1995 01:34:53,294 --> 01:34:55,095 [dog barks] 1996 01:34:55,129 --> 01:34:57,097 [Max] Vito Corleone Stevenson-Matthews, 1997 01:34:57,131 --> 01:34:59,433 Michael Corleone Stevenson-Matthews, 1998 01:34:59,466 --> 01:35:01,068 Sonny Corleone Stevenson-Matthews, 1999 01:35:01,101 --> 01:35:03,103 Grand Moff Tarkin Stevenson-Matthews-- 2000 01:35:03,137 --> 01:35:07,341 And Babu Frik Stevenson-Matthews. 2001 01:35:07,374 --> 01:35:08,709 [imitates Babu Frik] 2002 01:35:08,742 --> 01:35:10,645 -What was that? -That's Babu Frik. 2003 01:35:10,679 --> 01:35:12,279 Oh. Don't worry about it. 2004 01:35:12,313 --> 01:35:15,149 Were you able to, um, talk to the admissions office? 2005 01:35:15,182 --> 01:35:18,018 Could you reschedule your interview? Voice mail. 2006 01:35:18,052 --> 01:35:20,187 They haven't responded to my emails. 2007 01:35:20,788 --> 01:35:24,058 I'm sorry. No, it's okay. 2008 01:35:24,091 --> 01:35:26,961 My dad always said that everything happens for a reason. 2009 01:35:28,062 --> 01:35:31,899 And right now, I'm meant to be a doggie grandma. 2010 01:35:33,602 --> 01:35:35,369 And I'm happy with that. 2011 01:35:54,054 --> 01:35:55,089 Nicole. 2012 01:35:55,624 --> 01:35:56,857 Hmm? 2013 01:35:59,093 --> 01:36:00,227 What? 2014 01:36:21,616 --> 01:36:22,916 [sighs] 2015 01:36:30,457 --> 01:36:31,859 [Nicole moans] 2016 01:36:37,965 --> 01:36:40,167 What is it? Chloe's looking at us. 2017 01:36:40,200 --> 01:36:41,935 Oh. Chloe? Chloe, can you-- 2018 01:36:41,969 --> 01:36:44,138 I gotta-- Chloe, come on. Go. 2019 01:36:45,005 --> 01:36:47,408 Come on. Chloe, come on. Go, go, go. 2020 01:36:47,441 --> 01:36:49,143 Thank you. Okay. 2021 01:36:50,578 --> 01:36:52,146 [Nicole sighs] 2022 01:36:54,516 --> 01:36:55,550 [Channing barks] 2023 01:36:55,583 --> 01:36:57,418 -What? -Jesus Christ. 2024 01:36:57,451 --> 01:36:58,852 Channing Tatum's watching us. 2025 01:36:58,886 --> 01:37:01,556 Come on, buddy. Come on. Mama's busy. Come on. 2026 01:37:01,589 --> 01:37:02,823 Come on. 2027 01:37:03,558 --> 01:37:05,660 Okay, just stay in here please. 2028 01:37:05,694 --> 01:37:07,494 Okay, good boy. Holy shit. 2029 01:37:27,716 --> 01:37:29,216 No, no, no. 2030 01:37:29,249 --> 01:37:31,553 -No, no, no, no! This is incestuous. -[Nicole laughs] 2031 01:37:31,586 --> 01:37:34,789 -Come on. Get off. Get off. Channing, no. -Yeah, but you turned him on. 2032 01:37:34,823 --> 01:37:36,758 No, don't say that. 2033 01:37:36,791 --> 01:37:39,360 Go! Come on, guys, I-- Oh, man. 2034 01:37:39,393 --> 01:37:40,961 [Nicole chuckles] 2035 01:37:40,994 --> 01:37:44,131 [laughing] God. Let's go to the bedroom. 2036 01:37:44,164 --> 01:37:45,399 Yeah. 2037 01:37:53,374 --> 01:37:55,610 Oh, my God. I got in. 2038 01:37:55,643 --> 01:37:57,545 What? Yeah, I got in. 2039 01:37:57,579 --> 01:37:59,380 You-- That's amazing! 2040 01:37:59,413 --> 01:38:02,049 Wait. I'm confused. I don't understand how this happened. 2041 01:38:02,082 --> 01:38:04,686 I was supposed to show my portfolio in my interview. 2042 01:38:04,719 --> 01:38:06,453 Right. Um... 2043 01:38:06,487 --> 01:38:09,591 I submitted a virtual deck. You what? 2044 01:38:09,624 --> 01:38:12,359 I mean, all I did was put all your stuff together, 2045 01:38:12,393 --> 01:38:15,129 and I wrote a little personal statement and hit "send." 2046 01:38:16,765 --> 01:38:18,365 I mean, it was just-- 2047 01:38:24,539 --> 01:38:26,541 I can't believe that you would do that for me. 2048 01:38:27,474 --> 01:38:28,643 Yeah. 2049 01:38:29,711 --> 01:38:31,178 We should have a party to celebrate. 2050 01:38:31,211 --> 01:38:34,081 A party? Who are you? Yeah. 2051 01:38:34,114 --> 01:38:36,818 It'll be like a "you're awesome" party/puppy shower. 2052 01:38:36,851 --> 01:38:39,052 Okay, where are we having this party? 2053 01:38:40,020 --> 01:38:42,791 Here. In the apartment. Wait a second. 2054 01:38:42,824 --> 01:38:48,362 You're telling me you are going to have actual humans in your sanctuary? 2055 01:38:48,395 --> 01:38:50,899 Obviously they're gonna be wearing booties and masks. 2056 01:38:50,931 --> 01:38:54,569 No, I-- Obviously I don't think that they will. 2057 01:38:57,171 --> 01:38:59,072 Nicole, I don't want you to move out. 2058 01:39:00,542 --> 01:39:01,609 Then I won't. 2059 01:39:03,578 --> 01:39:05,613 ["Sweet Thing" playing] 2060 01:39:13,888 --> 01:39:15,322 [doorbell rings] 2061 01:39:17,692 --> 01:39:19,627 Congratulations, my darling. 2062 01:39:19,661 --> 01:39:21,094 Thank you, Mom. 2063 01:39:21,128 --> 01:39:24,566 So we do have a no shoes and a hand sanitizer policy. 2064 01:39:24,599 --> 01:39:27,401 Sounds like my kind of party. I thought so. 2065 01:39:27,434 --> 01:39:30,337 Thank you. 2066 01:39:30,370 --> 01:39:34,408 ♪ And I shall watch The ferry-boats And they'll get high♪ 2067 01:39:38,580 --> 01:39:43,984 ♪ On a bluer ocean Against tomorrow's sky♪ 2068 01:39:46,453 --> 01:39:47,922 Oh, wow. 2069 01:39:47,956 --> 01:39:50,991 ♪ And I will never Grow so old again♪ 2070 01:39:55,262 --> 01:39:59,734 ♪ And I will walk and talk In gardens all wet with rain♪ 2071 01:40:02,804 --> 01:40:04,639 ♪ Oh, whoa♪ 2072 01:40:04,672 --> 01:40:06,473 She's such a sniffer! 2073 01:40:07,675 --> 01:40:10,578 ♪ Sweet thing, sweet thing♪ 2074 01:40:12,045 --> 01:40:14,214 ♪ Baby, yeah♪ 2075 01:40:15,683 --> 01:40:17,384 ♪ Sweet thing♪ 2076 01:40:18,920 --> 01:40:21,221 [music fades, continues faintly] 2077 01:40:25,527 --> 01:40:26,594 Mmm. 2078 01:40:29,496 --> 01:40:31,331 Diane Matthews. 2079 01:40:31,966 --> 01:40:33,635 Nicole's mother. 2080 01:40:34,368 --> 01:40:37,572 Sid Saliba, Max's father... 2081 01:40:37,605 --> 01:40:40,340 figure, role model and boss. 2082 01:40:41,709 --> 01:40:42,744 Mmm. 2083 01:40:43,678 --> 01:40:48,248 That scarf is chic as shit, a few seasons ago. 2084 01:40:50,818 --> 01:40:55,790 But, ooh, that nail polish is beautiful on you. 2085 01:40:55,823 --> 01:40:58,091 Really brings your eyes out. 2086 01:40:59,527 --> 01:41:01,061 [chuckles] 2087 01:41:02,630 --> 01:41:04,064 [blows] 2088 01:41:09,136 --> 01:41:11,071 When this party's over... 2089 01:41:13,140 --> 01:41:15,510 take me somewhere sophisticated. 2090 01:41:15,543 --> 01:41:16,578 Yes, ma'am. 2091 01:41:19,246 --> 01:41:23,183 ♪ My, my, my My-my, my, my, my♪ 2092 01:41:27,689 --> 01:41:34,629 ♪ And I will raise my hand up Into the nighttime sky♪ 2093 01:41:37,264 --> 01:41:42,235 ♪ And count the stars That's shining in your eye♪ 2094 01:41:44,137 --> 01:41:49,711 ♪ And just to dig it all And not to wonder That's just fine♪ 2095 01:41:52,013 --> 01:41:58,720 ♪ And I'll be satisfied not to Read in between the lines♪ 2096 01:42:00,755 --> 01:42:06,193 ♪ And I will walk and talk In gardens all wet with rain♪ 2097 01:42:08,062 --> 01:42:13,835 ♪ And I will never, ever, ever Ever grow so old again♪ 2098 01:42:16,571 --> 01:42:18,840 ♪ Oh, whoa♪ 2099 01:42:20,842 --> 01:42:22,677 ♪ Sweet thing♪ 2100 01:42:25,947 --> 01:42:28,850 ["Growing Up" playing] 2101 01:42:45,365 --> 01:42:47,300 Now? Get the gloves out of the glove box! 2102 01:42:47,334 --> 01:42:49,537 Okay. Wait, where are they? In the glove box! 2103 01:42:49,570 --> 01:42:53,541 Okay. They're not in here! They're not in here. We don't have them. 2104 01:42:53,574 --> 01:42:57,477 Okay, well, the show must go on. Okay. 2105 01:42:58,613 --> 01:42:59,981 Delicious! 2106 01:43:00,014 --> 01:43:01,683 [laughter] 2107 01:43:06,186 --> 01:43:08,188 Delicious. 2108 01:43:08,221 --> 01:43:09,724 [laughter] 2109 01:43:09,757 --> 01:43:11,358 Shit. 2110 01:43:11,391 --> 01:43:14,028 It literally smells like crotch. It's so bad. 2111 01:43:14,062 --> 01:43:15,697 She's still licking her hoo-ha! 2112 01:43:15,730 --> 01:43:18,198 Well, is everything okay with her-- with her hoo-ha? 2113 01:43:18,231 --> 01:43:21,234 And can we please use-- Okay, one more time. 2114 01:43:21,268 --> 01:43:23,336 Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-ha. 2115 01:43:23,370 --> 01:43:26,941 [dog trainer] Stay! Good girl. Stay. Stay. Stay. 2116 01:43:33,614 --> 01:43:34,916 Bitch pig, huh? 2117 01:43:36,951 --> 01:43:38,553 [Max] You want it, you bitch pig? 2118 01:43:39,053 --> 01:43:40,253 Come on. 2119 01:43:40,287 --> 01:43:41,689 Let's go. All right, hold on. Huh? 2120 01:43:41,723 --> 01:43:43,591 Who the hell you think you talkin' to? 2121 01:43:43,624 --> 01:43:47,695 Your mother does not have a hot brother. Oh, fuck me. [laughs] 2122 01:43:47,729 --> 01:43:49,864 You have me in my head about my teeth now. 2123 01:43:49,897 --> 01:43:51,498 [director] Huh? [laughter] 2124 01:43:51,532 --> 01:43:53,968 [director] Let us see your teeth. Please show us your teeth. 2125 01:43:54,001 --> 01:43:55,402 Stop. 2126 01:43:55,435 --> 01:43:56,738 [director] More teeth. 2127 01:43:57,772 --> 01:43:58,840 And cut. 2128 01:43:58,873 --> 01:44:01,142 [crew laughs] [laughs] 2129 01:44:01,175 --> 01:44:03,511 Puppies! Puppies, puppies! 2130 01:44:04,277 --> 01:44:05,546 [both laugh] 2131 01:44:05,580 --> 01:44:08,149 Fuck! Sorry, guys. We just tooth banged. 2132 01:44:08,182 --> 01:44:12,887 That hurt so bad. Sorry. [laughing] [director] Let's reset. 2133 01:44:12,920 --> 01:44:16,023 We generally do a short consultation with the patient. 2134 01:44:16,057 --> 01:44:17,859 What type of-- 2135 01:44:17,892 --> 01:44:20,762 What do you need to-- [laughs] I'm sorry. [laughter] 2136 01:44:21,461 --> 01:44:22,563 Um... 2137 01:44:22,597 --> 01:44:25,700 Yeah, so what kind of-- [giggles] So sorry. 2138 01:44:25,733 --> 01:44:28,136 Okay. Fuck. 2139 01:44:28,169 --> 01:44:30,470 [instructor panting] [Max grunting] 2140 01:44:32,305 --> 01:44:34,942 [Max laughs] Yes, yes. Really good. 2141 01:44:34,976 --> 01:44:39,412 Keep finding your place, okay? You supple little bitch. 2142 01:44:42,784 --> 01:44:45,820 [song playing] 2143 01:46:16,110 --> 01:46:18,145 [song ends] 161356