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1
00:00:07,420 --> 00:00:08,420
No way!
2
00:00:10,620 --> 00:00:11,725
Er... Gosh!
3
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Where's the hole?!
4
00:00:15,011 --> 00:00:16,626
Ah! Ahh!
5
00:00:16,651 --> 00:00:18,076
Are you having a laugh?
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00:00:33,141 --> 00:00:34,626
Hello!
7
00:00:34,651 --> 00:00:36,316
Hello, everybody.
8
00:00:36,341 --> 00:00:38,676
I'm Greg Davies,
welcome to Taskmaster.
9
00:00:38,701 --> 00:00:41,196
It's episode seven, and it's at
this point in the competition
10
00:00:41,221 --> 00:00:44,086
when the mood shifts
and the real battle begins.
11
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,836
Tactics start to come into play,
12
00:00:45,861 --> 00:00:49,156
and contestants become ruthless
warriors intent on victory.
13
00:00:49,181 --> 00:00:51,515
And I wouldn't reveal what
I've heard backstage,
14
00:00:51,540 --> 00:00:53,907
cos I don't want to change your
perception of any one person.
15
00:00:53,931 --> 00:00:55,836
But as an example, yesterday,
16
00:00:55,861 --> 00:00:58,515
I overheard an unnamed
individual say,
17
00:00:58,540 --> 00:01:01,836
"I won't return to Ireland until
I've destroyed them all."
18
00:01:03,540 --> 00:01:04,986
Let's get on with it,
19
00:01:05,011 --> 00:01:07,446
and welcome our titans
of task once more!
20
00:01:07,471 --> 00:01:10,986
They are Ardal O'Hanlon...
21
00:01:11,011 --> 00:01:13,345
Bridget Christie...
22
00:01:13,370 --> 00:01:16,086
Chris Ramsey...
23
00:01:16,111 --> 00:01:18,446
judi Love...
24
00:01:18,471 --> 00:01:21,316
and Sophie Duker!
25
00:01:21,341 --> 00:01:23,676
And next to me,
the answer to the question,
26
00:01:23,701 --> 00:01:26,676
"Who's Greg throwing chicken at?"
It's...
27
00:01:26,701 --> 00:01:28,996
"little Alex Horne!
28
00:01:29,021 --> 00:01:31,836
CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Hello.
29
00:01:33,221 --> 00:01:35,036
What's the prize task, you fool?
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00:01:35,061 --> 00:01:37,395
Yes, this one has universal appeal,
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because they've been
asked to bring in
32
00:01:39,380 --> 00:01:43,116
the nicest thing
to put your finger in.
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00:01:43,141 --> 00:01:45,086
This is a Bafta-winning show.
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00:01:45,111 --> 00:01:47,996
The owner of the thing the
Taskmaster thinks is the nicest
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00:01:48,021 --> 00:01:50,756
thing to put his finger in
will be awarded five points.
36
00:01:50,781 --> 00:01:53,086
And, at the end of the episode,
the winner will take home
37
00:01:53,111 --> 00:01:54,246
five finger-worthy things.
38
00:01:54,271 --> 00:01:55,966
Yes, it's a really glove-ly prize.
39
00:01:57,420 --> 00:02:00,275
I know. I know.
40
00:02:00,300 --> 00:02:03,275
Ardal O'Hanlon, what would I
like to pop my finger in?
41
00:02:03,300 --> 00:02:06,676
Uh, I've brought in a finger puppet.
42
00:02:06,701 --> 00:02:08,996
Ah. Well, not just
any finger puppet.
43
00:02:09,021 --> 00:02:11,275
I brought in Dr Jerry.
44
00:02:11,300 --> 00:02:14,086
Erm... Dr Jerry Flynn, er, he's...
45
00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:21,086
I should point out
he's not a real doctor.
46
00:02:21,111 --> 00:02:23,395
He's more of a life coach.
47
00:02:23,420 --> 00:02:26,556
Can you just give me one example of
the advice Dr Jerry might give you?
48
00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:29,806
I asked him,
"Should I come on Taskmaster?"
49
00:02:29,831 --> 00:02:31,525
And I should've taken his advice.
50
00:02:33,581 --> 00:02:35,275
It's a strong opener. OK.
51
00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:38,046
Chris, can you beat
an insane finger puppet?
52
00:02:38,071 --> 00:02:41,636
I have brought in
not a finger puppet...
53
00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:44,446
a finger monster. Ooh. Oh.
54
00:02:44,471 --> 00:02:47,116
Watch out for the scary monster,
Greg, here it comes.
55
00:02:47,141 --> 00:02:49,966
Here it is! Eh? Ohh.
56
00:02:49,991 --> 00:02:51,076
I remember those.
57
00:02:51,101 --> 00:02:52,475
Are they soft? Are they soft?
58
00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:55,196
Yeah, soft, rubbery, really feels
lovely to put your finger in.
59
00:02:55,221 --> 00:02:56,806
Hm.
60
00:02:56,831 --> 00:02:59,166
They were a big feature
of my youth, these.
61
00:02:59,191 --> 00:03:01,166
I'm surprised they've lasted
into your generation.
62
00:03:01,191 --> 00:03:02,326
I thought they were...
63
00:03:02,351 --> 00:03:04,836
No, they started in the '50s,
and they are still around.
64
00:03:04,861 --> 00:03:08,240
He's really tapped into my youth,
back in the '50s,
65
00:03:08,265 --> 00:03:09,983
when I was down the doo-wop.
66
00:03:10,008 --> 00:03:13,063
Erm, Bridget,
what have you brought in?
67
00:03:13,088 --> 00:03:14,823
Fa rt putty!
68
00:03:14,848 --> 00:03:17,153
Oh, fart putty, good.
69
00:03:17,178 --> 00:03:21,153
It's really cold,
and really feels so good.
70
00:03:21,178 --> 00:03:23,903
But also goes...
71
00:03:23,928 --> 00:03:26,233
We do actually have a video
of it doing that noise.
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00:03:26,258 --> 00:03:27,423
Here we go!
73
00:03:30,178 --> 00:03:31,833
It sounds better than that normally.
74
00:03:31,858 --> 00:03:35,113
Does it? When I had my daughter,
she was induced,
75
00:03:35,138 --> 00:03:38,392
and the doctor had
to break my waters.
76
00:03:38,417 --> 00:03:40,193
They used, like, a little hook...
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00:03:42,088 --> 00:03:44,753
But he was really nervous
and kept doing it wrong.
78
00:03:44,778 --> 00:03:46,703
So, he kept going in and out,
and it was like...
79
00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:51,472
Anyway, so when I had to try
and make him feel more relaxed,
80
00:03:51,497 --> 00:03:54,342
I was like, "Oh, weren't you wearing
a watch a minute ago?"
81
00:03:59,537 --> 00:04:01,472
And he was, like, in and out,
and I was like,
82
00:04:01,497 --> 00:04:03,233
"Ah, this is like that fart putty."
83
00:04:03,258 --> 00:04:06,163
Ah. Whoa'.
84
00:04:06,188 --> 00:04:07,233
It's funny, innit?
85
00:04:07,258 --> 00:04:10,233
I'm sort of surprised that we've
arrived at this destination
86
00:04:10,258 --> 00:04:12,753
when we got on at
Silly Putty Station.
87
00:04:14,367 --> 00:04:15,553
Judi.
88
00:04:15,578 --> 00:04:17,833
I've brought in warm custard.
89
00:04:19,008 --> 00:04:21,953
It's gotta be a bigger bowl, though.
It's gotta be a bigger bowl.
90
00:04:21,978 --> 00:04:23,233
Oh, you put your whole head in?
91
00:04:23,258 --> 00:04:25,913
Well, you know, sometimes once
you put the fingers in,
92
00:04:25,938 --> 00:04:27,392
you do want to put your face in.
93
00:04:38,297 --> 00:04:40,033
Sophie, what have you brought in?
94
00:04:40,058 --> 00:04:43,392
I know that you, as the Taskmaster,
you like to control us like we're
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00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,953
your own tiny little puppets.
96
00:04:44,978 --> 00:04:46,193
I do.
97
00:04:47,448 --> 00:04:50,113
I've brought the closest thing
to me that I could bring
98
00:04:50,138 --> 00:04:52,833
to this competition. Oh, my God.
99
00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:55,243
I've brought Jane.
100
00:04:55,268 --> 00:04:57,673
I found her in a charity shop.
101
00:04:57,698 --> 00:04:59,993
She was wearing a different
outfit then, obviously.
102
00:05:00,018 --> 00:05:01,273
I put her in my Taskmaster outfit.
103
00:05:01,297 --> 00:05:04,073
What's she called again?
Jane Norman.
104
00:05:04,098 --> 00:05:07,602
Why have they got second names?
105
00:05:07,627 --> 00:05:10,033
So, is she a puppet-puppet?
She's a puppet-puppet.
106
00:05:10,058 --> 00:05:11,963
But the key finger goes
in her brain.
107
00:05:11,988 --> 00:05:15,993
The index finger is powering Jane's,
basically, sense of being.
108
00:05:16,018 --> 00:05:18,392
So, she doesn't talk,
she just sits with her mouth agawp?
109
00:05:18,417 --> 00:05:20,783
What she doesn't talk?
She does talk. Ha!
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00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:26,913
Here's the thing,
111
00:05:26,938 --> 00:05:30,522
the monsters, they remind me so
powerfully of my youth that...
112
00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:33,793
Same...| can't separate them
from putting my finger in
113
00:05:33,818 --> 00:05:35,323
a bowl of warm custard.
114
00:05:35,348 --> 00:05:37,913
And I still think farts
are hilarious, now that I've
115
00:05:37,938 --> 00:05:40,323
disassociated it from
Bridget's womb.
116
00:05:42,098 --> 00:05:44,433
So, I'm going to give three points
to you three.
117
00:05:44,458 --> 00:05:47,833
I'm going to give four points
to Jane Norman, because clearly,
118
00:05:47,858 --> 00:05:51,113
Ardal really needs Dr Jerry Flynn.
119
00:05:51,138 --> 00:05:53,472
And I'll give him
five points for that.
120
00:05:53,497 --> 00:05:55,433
There you go, Ardal O'Hanlon
gets five points!
121
00:05:58,068 --> 00:06:01,433
Alex Horne, you will play me
a sweet, sweet video.
122
00:06:01,458 --> 00:06:03,913
I will, but first, watch me do this.
123
00:06:21,377 --> 00:06:23,602
Judi Love. Hi, babes.
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00:06:24,738 --> 00:06:27,243
Hiya. Hi, Sophie.
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00:06:27,268 --> 00:06:28,763
Bridget. What?
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00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:33,482
I hope more people call me that
from now on. What, babes? Yeah.
127
00:06:33,507 --> 00:06:35,793
See what I'm going to call you
after I read this.
128
00:06:43,507 --> 00:06:44,843
"Show off.
129
00:06:44,868 --> 00:06:47,243
"Biggest show-off wins."
130
00:06:47,268 --> 00:06:48,993
"You have 20 minutes."
131
00:06:49,018 --> 00:06:51,433
"Your time starts now."
132
00:06:52,658 --> 00:06:55,243
Show off? Yeah.
133
00:06:55,268 --> 00:06:58,433
I don't know how to show off, babes.
134
00:07:02,908 --> 00:07:04,482
I can't wait to see
these guys show off.
135
00:07:04,507 --> 00:07:06,323
Yes, it's a tough task. Tough.
136
00:07:06,348 --> 00:07:09,152
They had to boastfully display
their abilities or accomplishments.
137
00:07:09,177 --> 00:07:11,963
And first up, forget about
the silly Citizens Advice Bureau,
138
00:07:11,988 --> 00:07:13,352
we've got a much better CAB...
139
00:07:13,377 --> 00:07:15,123
It's Chris, Ardal, and Bridget.
140
00:07:16,507 --> 00:07:19,323
Oh, God where do I start?
141
00:07:19,348 --> 00:07:21,602
Start by, I suppose,
juggling bricks.
142
00:07:23,868 --> 00:07:24,923
OK.
143
00:07:27,538 --> 00:07:29,003
OK.
144
00:07:29,028 --> 00:07:31,482
I have an idea. I'll be back.
145
00:07:33,427 --> 00:07:36,763
Have you got a gun?
146
00:07:36,788 --> 00:07:37,843
No.
147
00:07:37,868 --> 00:07:40,323
I'm going to do one thing that
my dad taught us that I think
148
00:07:40,348 --> 00:07:41,763
I might be able to do.
149
00:07:41,788 --> 00:07:43,402
So, no guns, no?
150
00:07:43,427 --> 00:07:44,643
No.
151
00:07:44,668 --> 00:07:46,152
Have you got an axe?
152
00:07:46,177 --> 00:07:47,177
No.
153
00:07:51,148 --> 00:07:54,043
I'm going to see how many balls
I can get in there.
154
00:07:54,068 --> 00:07:56,003
Great.
155
00:07:56,028 --> 00:07:58,323
Oh.
156
00:07:58,348 --> 00:08:00,083
Oh.
157
00:08:00,108 --> 00:08:02,923
Come on. Oh!
158
00:08:05,177 --> 00:08:06,362
Ooh.
159
00:08:26,828 --> 00:08:29,723
Are you trying to knock it off,
or get it in it? Get it in. Ah.
160
00:08:29,748 --> 00:08:32,362
I might pop it just down
here for now.
161
00:08:49,637 --> 00:08:52,203
That would've been much better
with some sort of gun.
162
00:08:58,228 --> 00:09:00,443
Right, I should try the yellow one.
163
00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:07,443
I think it's cos the, er...
buckets aren't heavy enough.
164
00:09:07,468 --> 00:09:09,412
Moment of truth.
165
00:09:09,437 --> 00:09:13,723
I might've been a bit too ambitious,
with what I can do here.
166
00:09:33,808 --> 00:09:35,033
Thanks, Chris.
167
00:09:36,808 --> 00:09:39,392
You were inside
for 14 minutes, Ardal.
168
00:09:39,417 --> 00:09:42,753
Well, I think you'll see
the time was not wasted.
169
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:47,903
I'm going to balance
this wooden spoon on my chin.
170
00:09:52,058 --> 00:09:54,623
You see? Oh. Yeah.
171
00:10:02,088 --> 00:10:04,863
OK, thanks, then. Thanks, Bridget.
Yeah, bye, then. I enjoyed that.
172
00:10:04,888 --> 00:10:06,113
Yeah, thanks.
173
00:10:06,138 --> 00:10:07,503
I can do this, as well.
174
00:10:10,218 --> 00:10:11,673
I can do it for ages.
175
00:10:13,528 --> 00:10:14,983
Doesn't hurt.
176
00:10:16,338 --> 00:10:17,863
Hurts a little bit now.
177
00:10:20,138 --> 00:10:21,222
OK.
178
00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:29,863
Oh, all so enjoyable for
such different reasons.
179
00:10:29,888 --> 00:10:32,993
Bridget and I'm not normally
this direct, erm,
180
00:10:33,018 --> 00:10:34,423
what's wrong with you?
181
00:10:37,778 --> 00:10:40,142
I thought, "Don't try and
do something else.
182
00:10:40,167 --> 00:10:42,673
"Stay with the balls.
Don't give up."
183
00:10:42,698 --> 00:10:44,503
Believe in yourself.
Believe in yourself.
184
00:10:44,528 --> 00:10:46,833
You've got to back yourself —
If you won't back yourself,
185
00:10:46,858 --> 00:10:48,313
who'll back you, right? Nobody.
186
00:10:48,338 --> 00:10:49,602
Dr Jeffy-
187
00:10:54,297 --> 00:10:56,783
I'm telling you this —
I'm fascinated by what went on in
188
00:10:56,808 --> 00:10:59,073
the 14 minutes of absence.
189
00:10:59,098 --> 00:11:01,833
14 minutes... Yeah... of absence.
190
00:11:01,858 --> 00:11:05,142
And you came back, I think,
with glitter in your hair. Yes.
191
00:11:05,167 --> 00:11:07,503
Er, and you conclusively proved that
192
00:11:07,528 --> 00:11:10,963
you're incapable of balancing
a spoon on your chin.
193
00:11:10,988 --> 00:11:13,963
I am fundamentally incapable
of showing off.
194
00:11:13,988 --> 00:11:16,272
I come from a place where
showing off is, like,
195
00:11:16,297 --> 00:11:17,963
the worst thing you can do.
196
00:11:17,988 --> 00:11:20,863
People in my town won't wear
high-vis jackets, because...
197
00:11:23,167 --> 00:11:24,392
It's true!
198
00:11:24,417 --> 00:11:27,793
Erm, Chris, look at the reaction
your dad gained you.
199
00:11:27,818 --> 00:11:30,193
It was... |—| thought...
..fever pitch in here.
200
00:11:30,218 --> 00:11:33,553
Honestly, that's better than
some gigs I've done, that.
201
00:11:34,708 --> 00:11:36,943
What's his name, your dad? Er, Bill.
202
00:11:36,968 --> 00:11:38,272
Well played, Bill!
203
00:11:38,297 --> 00:11:41,472
And if that display of talent hasn't
done enough to guarantee your return
204
00:11:41,497 --> 00:11:44,833
after the break,
that is 100% fair enough.
205
00:11:44,858 --> 00:11:47,913
No hard feelings,
look after yourselves. Bye!
206
00:11:57,958 --> 00:12:00,603
Welcome back, and hurry up!
We've already started.
207
00:12:00,628 --> 00:12:02,443
Yes, we've already nearly finished.
208
00:12:02,468 --> 00:12:04,083
It's now time to head to the stage
209
00:12:04,108 --> 00:12:06,523
for the final task of the show!
210
00:12:06,548 --> 00:12:09,362
Not really, I'm just having
a bit of a laugh with everyone.
211
00:12:13,158 --> 00:12:16,003
His face... Before the break,
Ardal and Bridget proved that they
212
00:12:16,028 --> 00:12:19,242
aren't really show-offs in a task
where the biggest show-off wins.
213
00:12:19,267 --> 00:12:22,853
Next up, here's how
Sophie and Judi got on.
214
00:12:22,878 --> 00:12:25,133
That is so cringey.
215
00:12:25,158 --> 00:12:26,292
Going to have to tell jokes.
216
00:12:26,317 --> 00:12:29,292
You'll have to come to my show
and see that — my sold-out show.
217
00:12:29,317 --> 00:12:32,242
Erm, I'm a Loose Woman, as well.
218
00:12:32,267 --> 00:12:33,412
Do you know what I mean?
219
00:12:33,437 --> 00:12:34,963
Won an award.
220
00:12:38,598 --> 00:12:41,403
"But soft, what light through
yonder windows breaks?
221
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:44,213
"It is the east,
and Juliet is the sun."
222
00:12:44,238 --> 00:12:46,492
I've met some famous people.
223
00:12:46,517 --> 00:12:47,883
Blige,
224
00:12:47,908 --> 00:12:51,412
Kevin Hart, H-Town, jodeci.
225
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:55,803
"Arise, fair sun, and kill the
envious moon, who is already sick
226
00:12:55,828 --> 00:12:57,653
"and pale with grief that thou,
her maid,
227
00:12:57,678 --> 00:12:59,573
"art far more fair than she."
228
00:12:59,598 --> 00:13:03,653
I feel like I'm in
the popular mums' WhatsApp group.
229
00:13:03,678 --> 00:13:06,242
"Be not her maid,
since she is envious.
230
00:13:06,267 --> 00:13:08,773
"Her best delivery is
but sick and green, and numb,
231
00:13:08,798 --> 00:13:10,162
"but fools do wear it.
232
00:13:10,187 --> 00:13:11,453
"Cast it off."
233
00:13:12,628 --> 00:13:16,492
I go to my most favourite
local West Indian shop,
234
00:13:16,517 --> 00:13:18,853
always get a little
discount in there.
235
00:13:18,878 --> 00:13:21,403
Lidl's have sent me free
stuff before.
236
00:13:21,428 --> 00:13:23,213
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
237
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:34,523
Oh! To all the mums out there —
I had two kids.
238
00:13:34,548 --> 00:13:37,042
Had no stitches, no stitches.
239
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,513
I mean, clench-clench.
240
00:13:47,118 --> 00:13:49,403
I mean, I can touch my toes.
241
00:13:50,818 --> 00:13:52,222
Both of them at the same time.
242
00:13:54,098 --> 00:13:55,513
Like, good with the kids.
243
00:13:59,507 --> 00:14:01,482
Got close train station.
244
00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:05,433
I've got loads of lovely,
luscious parks around me.
245
00:14:11,098 --> 00:14:13,843
I mean, honestly,
Mumma didn't raise no fool.
246
00:14:13,868 --> 00:14:17,663
I can fry evenly four fish fingers,
247
00:14:17,688 --> 00:14:19,993
four, all at the same time.
248
00:14:20,018 --> 00:14:22,272
All come out golden-y.
249
00:14:25,458 --> 00:14:26,458
Ooh!
250
00:14:29,047 --> 00:14:31,743
Done? I think so. Yeah? Yeah.
251
00:14:31,768 --> 00:14:33,232
5Y9“ bye. Bye,
252
00:14:36,738 --> 00:14:39,152
That was really cringey
and uncomfortable.
253
00:14:39,177 --> 00:14:40,993
We had to force it out of you.
254
00:14:47,297 --> 00:14:49,673
Quite the contrast.
255
00:14:49,698 --> 00:14:53,022
To the extent that I don't
really know where to start.
256
00:14:53,047 --> 00:14:58,232
I suppose the most marked contrast
was when Sophie was underwater,
257
00:14:58,257 --> 00:15:00,633
having performed Shakespeare,
258
00:15:00,658 --> 00:15:05,873
and judi was bragging about how good
she is at frying fish fingers.
259
00:15:05,898 --> 00:15:07,793
To me, it's like a national dish.
260
00:15:07,818 --> 00:15:10,993
When you can fry four of them
at the same time evenly,
261
00:15:11,018 --> 00:15:13,743
and they come out golden —
Hello, I'm that bitch. Hello.
262
00:15:19,898 --> 00:15:22,873
She was handcuffed and underwater!
263
00:15:22,898 --> 00:15:25,203
I think it was really good. Yeah.
264
00:15:25,228 --> 00:15:27,513
But I would just argue that,
that could've been footage
265
00:15:27,538 --> 00:15:30,643
of Judi in any task.
266
00:15:30,668 --> 00:15:33,433
At any time.
267
00:15:33,458 --> 00:15:35,073
I've got some great favourites.
268
00:15:35,098 --> 00:15:37,073
She gets a lot of emails.
That's not bad.
269
00:15:37,098 --> 00:15:39,673
The fourth-last one was,
"I have borrowed a dog."
270
00:15:39,698 --> 00:15:41,593
That was, that was... Hello?
271
00:15:41,618 --> 00:15:44,434
That's the kind of life that I live,
that I can borrow a dog when I want.
272
00:15:44,458 --> 00:15:46,393
"I can borrow a dog
whenever I want?"
273
00:15:46,418 --> 00:15:49,203
I've got a picture of it!
I believe you can do it.
274
00:15:49,228 --> 00:15:51,643
No, we believe you!
275
00:15:51,668 --> 00:15:54,313
Judi, Sophie was
performing Shakespeare.
276
00:15:54,338 --> 00:15:56,232
I gave you culture.
277
00:15:56,257 --> 00:15:58,513
Literature.
278
00:15:58,538 --> 00:16:00,203
Water.
279
00:16:00,228 --> 00:16:02,513
Here's how I'm going to score it.
280
00:16:02,538 --> 00:16:05,593
Oh, good. And I feel a bit mean,
because actually, Bridget.
281
00:16:05,618 --> 00:16:07,443
Oh, not aga...
282
00:16:07,468 --> 00:16:10,112
LAUGHTER What is wrong with you?
283
00:16:10,137 --> 00:16:12,563
So, worse than Ardal? What?
284
00:16:12,588 --> 00:16:14,282
I can't believe it!
285
00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:17,203
Sometimes absence is
more powerful than presence.
286
00:16:17,228 --> 00:16:19,753
And then, there was the glitter!
287
00:16:19,778 --> 00:16:22,112
I'm going to give him
an extra point than you.
288
00:16:22,137 --> 00:16:23,593
Fine. Go on, then.
289
00:16:23,618 --> 00:16:25,873
I hope you can sleep tonight.
290
00:16:25,898 --> 00:16:27,643
I'll be fine.
291
00:16:27,668 --> 00:16:30,443
OK, so it's two points
to Ardal O'Hanlon.
292
00:16:30,468 --> 00:16:33,282
Yeah, and judi — I felt like
there was a drop-off in quality.
293
00:16:33,307 --> 00:16:36,473
'Course. She started big,
and she went to Lidl.
294
00:16:36,498 --> 00:16:39,393
No of fence, Lidl. No of fence, Lidl.
295
00:16:39,418 --> 00:16:41,362
We had a classic bit of clowning,
296
00:16:41,387 --> 00:16:44,753
and then, we had one of the
strangest sections of showing off
297
00:16:44,778 --> 00:16:48,112
I've ever seen by combining
escapology with Shakespeare...
298
00:16:48,137 --> 00:16:50,112
And having a bath.
..and having a bath.
299
00:16:50,137 --> 00:16:52,112
I'll change my mind slightly.
300
00:16:52,137 --> 00:16:54,883
I'll pop them at the top of
the pile with five points each.
301
00:16:54,908 --> 00:16:56,593
I'm going to bring judi up to four.
302
00:16:56,618 --> 00:16:58,953
OK. I'm going to bring Ardal
up to three...
303
00:16:58,978 --> 00:17:01,443
Uh-uh... and I'm going to
give you two points now.
304
00:17:01,468 --> 00:17:03,753
Yeah, that's cheered her up.
305
00:17:04,748 --> 00:17:07,203
There we go so, it's five points
to Chris and Sophie!
306
00:17:07,228 --> 00:17:08,242
There it is.
307
00:17:10,588 --> 00:17:14,393
Let's have a scoreboard, please,
little Alex Horne. 'Course.
308
00:17:14,418 --> 00:17:15,883
Bridget's on five at the bottom.
309
00:17:15,908 --> 00:17:17,723
Sophie's at the top with
nine points!
310
00:17:20,468 --> 00:17:21,753
What's next?!
311
00:17:21,778 --> 00:17:23,112
Team drinks!
312
00:17:35,778 --> 00:17:38,963
Gentlemen. There we go.
313
00:17:38,988 --> 00:17:41,883
Hello. Oh, hello, Ardal.
314
00:17:41,908 --> 00:17:43,003
Hiya.
315
00:17:48,028 --> 00:17:49,523
Hi, team.
316
00:17:49,548 --> 00:17:50,963
Oh, hi.
317
00:17:52,548 --> 00:17:54,162
Well, you look really cool.
318
00:17:54,187 --> 00:17:56,473
But please, could you now
put on your hats?
319
00:17:56,498 --> 00:17:57,723
Oh, God.
320
00:17:58,858 --> 00:18:00,753
And if one of you could
pick up the task.
321
00:18:01,958 --> 00:18:05,042
Oh, I'm not able to.
Oh, I must try again.
322
00:18:05,067 --> 00:18:08,853
Oh, couldn't do it, then.
Er, I'll help you.
323
00:18:08,878 --> 00:18:11,162
Shall I get it?
It doesn't say, I mean...
324
00:18:11,187 --> 00:18:12,603
Yeah, you get it babes.
325
00:18:17,187 --> 00:18:20,403
"Deliver a cocktail to Greg."
326
00:18:20,428 --> 00:18:22,653
"Deliver a cocktail to Greg."
327
00:18:25,317 --> 00:18:26,603
Who's Greg?
328
00:18:27,958 --> 00:18:30,573
"Your cocktail must have
the following ingredients.
329
00:18:37,628 --> 00:18:40,653
"Every ingredient must
pass through a head pipe before
330
00:18:40,678 --> 00:18:42,933
"entering the Taskmaster's glass."
331
00:18:42,958 --> 00:18:44,323
"Fastest wins."
332
00:18:44,348 --> 00:18:47,083
"Your time starts now, and ends
when you have garnished
333
00:18:47,108 --> 00:18:49,122
"your cocktail with the umbrella."
334
00:18:49,147 --> 00:18:51,042
So, we're looking for
fruits and liquids.
335
00:18:51,067 --> 00:18:53,403
Oh, I cannae see a glass either.
336
00:18:53,428 --> 00:18:54,683
I don't like this at all.
337
00:18:54,708 --> 00:18:56,653
This must be what
an anteater feels like. OK.
338
00:19:02,958 --> 00:19:05,203
Did I hearjudi say,
"Who's Greg"?
339
00:19:06,708 --> 00:19:09,323
No, I said — I thought
you said "Heg". Heg.
340
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,883
LAUGHTER Oh, good.
341
00:19:11,908 --> 00:19:15,523
And congratulations to Bridget,
as well, for being the only person
342
00:19:15,548 --> 00:19:19,162
of all five of them
to work out that knees bend.
343
00:19:23,508 --> 00:19:25,093
Thank you.
344
00:19:25,118 --> 00:19:27,013
OK, here we go.
345
00:19:27,038 --> 00:19:29,563
OK, I see some juice
over there. Yeah, OK, right.
346
00:19:29,588 --> 00:19:31,172
Chris! What?
347
00:19:31,197 --> 00:19:34,763
I have some liquids. And
some fruit. Ooh!
348
00:19:34,788 --> 00:19:36,122
How many cocktails?
349
00:19:36,147 --> 00:19:38,403
All the information's
on the task, Judi.
350
00:19:39,397 --> 00:19:43,042
Er...
351
00:19:43,067 --> 00:19:44,203
Ah!
352
00:19:44,228 --> 00:19:45,533
Where's the glass?
353
00:19:45,558 --> 00:19:47,893
Oh, it's in here,
it's in here, it's in here!
354
00:19:47,918 --> 00:19:49,563
Here, babes,
just put this in your hole.
355
00:19:49,588 --> 00:19:51,122
Going to put this in your hole.
356
00:19:51,147 --> 00:19:52,893
You need to put your
pipe over there,
357
00:19:52,918 --> 00:19:54,533
so I can put this down your hole.
358
00:19:54,558 --> 00:19:57,042
Guys, I've got quite
a heavy bucket of ice.
359
00:19:57,067 --> 00:19:58,453
Where? Here. Ah!
360
00:19:58,478 --> 00:19:59,843
Girl, you're strong.
361
00:19:59,868 --> 00:20:01,763
Ah!
362
00:20:04,317 --> 00:20:06,042
Ah! Ahh!
363
00:20:08,348 --> 00:20:09,963
Oh, my God.
364
00:20:09,988 --> 00:20:12,252
Shall we swap?
I'll do that. Yeah.
365
00:20:19,678 --> 00:20:23,172
That's one liquid.
Just a tiny segment is all we need.
366
00:20:23,197 --> 00:20:25,683
This. Got it stuck. Oh!
367
00:20:27,588 --> 00:20:28,653
Put too much in.
368
00:20:28,678 --> 00:20:31,013
OK, well, let me just put it
through yours, then.
369
00:20:31,038 --> 00:20:32,973
That's it, hold still,
hold still.
370
00:20:32,998 --> 00:20:35,292
This feels really demeaning.
371
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:38,333
Have you got the banana in?
It's slipping out, hold on.
372
00:20:39,868 --> 00:20:42,893
Can you not use your hand?
373
00:20:44,918 --> 00:20:46,563
Hey. Hey, there's orange in there!
374
00:20:46,588 --> 00:20:47,693
The orange is in there.
375
00:20:52,147 --> 00:20:54,813
Nice, right, we need to
leave room for the ice now. OK.
376
00:20:54,838 --> 00:20:57,893
There's quite a bit of ice.
Right, so start layering the ice in.
377
00:20:58,947 --> 00:21:02,653
Plop, plop. plop-
378
00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:03,893
Oh.
379
00:21:03,918 --> 00:21:05,013
I'll stir it, now.
380
00:21:05,038 --> 00:21:06,453
I'm getting another liquid.
381
00:21:07,718 --> 00:21:09,013
Quite a bit of ice.
382
00:21:11,118 --> 00:21:12,613
That's me shaking it.
383
00:21:12,638 --> 00:21:14,973
We just need one more liquid, then
we've done it.
384
00:21:14,998 --> 00:21:18,483
It needs to be shaken and stirred,
so we might need a cocktail shaker.
385
00:21:18,508 --> 00:21:19,563
Right.
386
00:21:19,588 --> 00:21:21,563
Yeah, why don't we make it out of
this bucket?
387
00:21:21,588 --> 00:21:22,922
I'll go and get a lid.
388
00:21:22,947 --> 00:21:24,483
I've got a lid.
389
00:21:28,998 --> 00:21:30,733
That's the sexiest thing I've ever
seen.
390
00:21:30,758 --> 00:21:33,052
And we need to stir as well. There
we go.
391
00:21:33,077 --> 00:21:35,693
Shit. Is this a full one?
392
00:21:35,718 --> 00:21:38,132
Argh! Oh!
393
00:21:38,157 --> 00:21:39,663
Go forward.
394
00:21:45,358 --> 00:21:48,853
I've stopped the clock. Great
teamwork, everyone.
395
00:21:48,878 --> 00:21:50,252
Go on.
396
00:21:50,277 --> 00:21:52,052
Perfect.
397
00:21:52,077 --> 00:21:54,413
I think Taskmaster will really love
this.
398
00:21:54,438 --> 00:21:57,103
If this goes through the pipe, like,
we just can't be beaten.
399
00:22:01,407 --> 00:22:02,613
Did it go in? No.
400
00:22:02,638 --> 00:22:03,773
No?
401
00:22:03,798 --> 00:22:05,333
Ice time.
402
00:22:05,358 --> 00:22:07,052
Come on, fire it in. Thanks, mate.
403
00:22:07,077 --> 00:22:08,213
Faster, faster!
404
00:22:08,238 --> 00:22:10,283
Remember Tom Cruise in Cocktail.
405
00:22:10,308 --> 00:22:14,663
OK, swap over. You go... you go down
and I'll do the ice. Yeah, yeah.
406
00:22:14,688 --> 00:22:15,693
Nice.
407
00:22:18,518 --> 00:22:20,382
Give us a bit of fruit.
408
00:22:23,488 --> 00:22:25,853
Yeah, fruit! You ready?
409
00:22:25,878 --> 00:22:28,853
We should stoop down low, when we're
giving it to him. Yeah.
410
00:22:31,438 --> 00:22:33,853
That's your classic NeGREG|.
411
00:22:44,848 --> 00:22:47,773
Well, interesting team dynamic.
412
00:22:47,798 --> 00:22:50,973
Sophie's job seemed to be screaming
and breaking things.
413
00:22:52,438 --> 00:22:54,823
Judi seemed to be eating half a
banana,
414
00:22:54,848 --> 00:22:59,333
and then, repeatedly threatening to
put a banana down someone's hole.
415
00:22:59,358 --> 00:23:02,213
And Bridget did the rest of the
stuff
416
00:23:02,238 --> 00:23:04,132
and exercised some common sense.
417
00:23:04,157 --> 00:23:05,463
That's the way I see it. Yes.
418
00:23:05,488 --> 00:23:06,853
It's a rare moment in the series,
419
00:23:06,878 --> 00:23:10,132
where Bridget is the voice of
reason.
420
00:23:10,157 --> 00:23:13,623
I mean, the obvious highlight is
Ardal's arse lid that he created.
421
00:23:14,928 --> 00:23:17,773
Like Tom Cruise, isn't it? It's like
Tom Cruise. just like Tom Cruise.
422
00:23:17,798 --> 00:23:21,333
Well, unlike the girls, we actually
used a cocktail shaker.
423
00:23:21,358 --> 00:23:24,573
I mean... They should've used a
traditional cocktail shaker
424
00:23:24,598 --> 00:23:26,052
just like you did, Ardal. Yes.
425
00:23:27,568 --> 00:23:29,903
Yes. Were the boys faster than the
girls?
426
00:23:29,928 --> 00:23:32,493
Oh, it took three times as long as
the girls.
427
00:23:32,518 --> 00:23:36,262
No way! Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh,
dean
428
00:23:36,287 --> 00:23:39,262
So, 13:27 minutes versus 4:30
minutes.
429
00:23:39,287 --> 00:23:41,573
So, the girls 100% five points.
430
00:23:41,598 --> 00:23:43,413
But the boys have to be rewarded in
some way.
431
00:23:43,438 --> 00:23:44,653
They did complete the task.
432
00:23:44,678 --> 00:23:47,024
I'm going to give them two points
each. I think that's fair.
433
00:23:47,048 --> 00:23:50,493
Oh, three, come on. Are you trying
to question Greg's authority?
434
00:23:50,518 --> 00:23:52,903
You didn't know who I fucking was a
minute ago!
435
00:23:59,008 --> 00:24:02,132
Right, time for a power nap. Three,
two, one, sleep.
436
00:24:11,638 --> 00:24:13,453
Hello! Hello, again.
437
00:24:13,478 --> 00:24:16,373
You join us in the middle of a messy
work outing.
438
00:24:16,398 --> 00:24:19,373
We've had some drinks, so now we've
got the munchies.
439
00:24:33,838 --> 00:24:36,133
Hi, Bridget.
440
00:24:36,158 --> 00:24:38,453
Oh, I haven't seen one of these
for years!
441
00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:41,453
Am I about to reveal the budget?
442
00:24:41,478 --> 00:24:42,478
I hope so.
443
00:24:47,948 --> 00:24:50,533
Sculpt the most beautiful sculpture.
444
00:24:50,558 --> 00:24:56,303
Your sculpture must weigh exactly
150g and be entirely edible.
445
00:24:56,328 --> 00:24:58,693
That means that you can eat it.
446
00:24:58,718 --> 00:25:02,213
You have five minutes to order your
ingredients.
447
00:25:02,238 --> 00:25:05,022
Then, 20 minutes to sculpt your
sculpture.
448
00:25:06,638 --> 00:25:08,972
Do you mind reading the rest
of it out loud?
449
00:25:08,997 --> 00:25:11,333
No, no, cos I need time to think.
Right.
450
00:25:11,358 --> 00:25:13,613
Your time starts, now.
451
00:25:13,638 --> 00:25:15,383
Can I have flour?
452
00:25:15,408 --> 00:25:16,852
500g of butter.
453
00:25:16,877 --> 00:25:22,333
For your 150g... Can I get
200g of butter, please? Yeah.
454
00:25:22,358 --> 00:25:25,022
Can I find that 150g before I say
the last line?
455
00:25:25,047 --> 00:25:27,464
Do you want me to go and get
you a scale? Yes, please. OK.
456
00:25:27,488 --> 00:25:29,772
Um... I suppose tofu...
457
00:25:29,797 --> 00:25:32,133
although it's not... it's not
edible.
458
00:25:32,158 --> 00:25:35,333
All I'm thinking of is cheese.
All I can think of is cheese.
459
00:25:35,358 --> 00:25:37,022
Look can I have steak?
460
00:25:37,047 --> 00:25:39,293
But it has to be cooked. No!
461
00:25:39,318 --> 00:25:40,573
Urghg
462
00:25:40,598 --> 00:25:41,892
Some scales there.
463
00:25:43,278 --> 00:25:45,213
Oh, half a mug.
464
00:25:45,238 --> 00:25:46,543
Half a mug?
465
00:25:46,568 --> 00:25:48,543
And it's got to be the most
beautiful sculpture
466
00:25:48,568 --> 00:25:49,663
you've ever seen.
467
00:25:49,688 --> 00:25:51,333
You don't have to make it out of the
mug.
468
00:25:51,358 --> 00:25:53,334
You can make it out of something
lighter than a mug.
469
00:25:53,358 --> 00:25:55,663
Flour, eggs, milk, butter, a rolling
pin...
470
00:25:55,688 --> 00:25:57,663
Get some Dairylea triangles.
471
00:25:57,688 --> 00:26:00,663
Have you read out the rest of the
task, yet? No. No, right.
472
00:26:00,688 --> 00:26:02,102
Can I get bananas?
473
00:26:02,127 --> 00:26:03,263
Spaghetti!
474
00:26:03,288 --> 00:26:05,133
Bread?
475
00:26:05,158 --> 00:26:06,693
Your time starts, now.
476
00:26:09,927 --> 00:26:12,652
Well, I'm very keen to get on and
see the creative process.
477
00:26:12,677 --> 00:26:13,933
Course, you are.
478
00:26:13,958 --> 00:26:17,463
First, we're going to see Chris'
out-of-this-world sculpture.
479
00:26:17,488 --> 00:26:18,573
Lovely.
480
00:26:19,797 --> 00:26:22,463
Oh, shit. That's 65 already.
481
00:26:22,488 --> 00:26:23,693
I'm stress eating.
482
00:26:26,518 --> 00:26:29,263
Oh, that is nice. Oh, I do like a
bit of cheese.
483
00:26:30,438 --> 00:26:33,022
144. I think that's OK.
484
00:26:33,047 --> 00:26:34,823
You think that's 150?
485
00:26:34,848 --> 00:26:37,743
It has to be 150, not less than?
486
00:26:37,768 --> 00:26:39,133
Oh, no.
487
00:26:39,158 --> 00:26:41,652
I'll just make the cheese ball
bigger.
488
00:26:41,677 --> 00:26:42,852
That's too big.
489
00:26:46,518 --> 00:26:48,383
Not nice, that.
490
00:26:48,408 --> 00:26:49,663
150.
491
00:26:49,688 --> 00:26:50,823
Great.
492
00:26:50,848 --> 00:26:52,133
OK.
493
00:26:52,158 --> 00:26:54,463
Right, so, that just stands up on
there.
494
00:26:54,488 --> 00:26:55,493
Ta-da!
495
00:26:56,568 --> 00:26:58,133
Do you know what it is?
496
00:26:58,158 --> 00:27:02,703
Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars,
Jupiter — big gassy ball,
497
00:27:02,728 --> 00:27:05,263
Saturn — got rings, two fried eggs.
498
00:27:05,288 --> 00:27:08,852
Pluto — declassified, mate. Not a
planet. Don't worry about it.
499
00:27:08,877 --> 00:27:10,343
Thank you very much, Chris.
500
00:27:10,368 --> 00:27:12,933
Thank you. Be very careful with
that.
501
00:27:12,958 --> 00:27:14,293
Will do. Sorry, before you go...
502
00:27:14,318 --> 00:27:15,623
Yeah... one more.
503
00:27:18,448 --> 00:27:20,423
Oh, God.
504
00:27:20,448 --> 00:27:21,743
F...
505
00:27:24,648 --> 00:27:27,343
Completely consume your beautiful
sculpture.
506
00:27:27,368 --> 00:27:30,543
Fastest wins. Your time starts, now.
507
00:27:30,568 --> 00:27:32,823
God, I hate you.
508
00:27:32,848 --> 00:27:34,503
I hate you so much.
509
00:27:34,528 --> 00:27:36,263
This is terrible.
510
00:27:39,038 --> 00:27:40,852
There goes Jupiter.
511
00:27:40,877 --> 00:27:43,143
Wish it was all gas. It's not, it's
cheese.
512
00:27:49,318 --> 00:27:50,862
It's so dry!
513
00:27:57,488 --> 00:27:58,902
Urghg
514
00:27:58,927 --> 00:28:01,823
I haven't ate raw spaghetti, since I
was a kid. I can't do it.
515
00:28:04,208 --> 00:28:05,782
Stop the clock.
516
00:28:09,958 --> 00:28:12,902
Well, I mean, it's a magical
sculpture, first of all.
517
00:28:12,927 --> 00:28:15,373
Lovely little detail at the end with
the blueberry as well.
518
00:28:15,398 --> 00:28:17,703
The declassified. Yeah, it was
wonderful.
519
00:28:17,728 --> 00:28:18,703
Wonderful. Really nice.
520
00:28:18,728 --> 00:28:21,393
And you are going to judge this on
the beauty of the sculpture,
521
00:28:21,418 --> 00:28:23,193
and then, the speed of the
consuming,
522
00:28:23,218 --> 00:28:24,543
so it's two tasks, really.
523
00:28:24,568 --> 00:28:26,902
Well, let's be honest, he didn't
complete the consuming.
524
00:28:26,927 --> 00:28:30,223
13g was unconsumed cos he said he's
not a child any more,
525
00:28:30,248 --> 00:28:32,263
so he's not going to eat uncooked
spaghetti.
526
00:28:32,288 --> 00:28:35,303
Did you used to... did you used to
eat uncooked spaghetti as a child?
527
00:28:35,328 --> 00:28:37,063
I did used to eat uncooked
spaghetti.
528
00:28:37,088 --> 00:28:38,902
I did as well, and sometimes, alone.
529
00:28:41,368 --> 00:28:43,862
Well, I mean, it's not a group
activity.
530
00:28:43,887 --> 00:28:44,982
Who's next?
531
00:28:45,007 --> 00:28:48,553
Next up, it's the unsuspecting Ardal
and Judi.
532
00:28:51,498 --> 00:28:53,023
Check that these are real.
533
00:29:01,048 --> 00:29:02,373
I'm going to strain the bread.
534
00:29:06,088 --> 00:29:08,023
I mean, this is not sticking, is it?
535
00:29:12,498 --> 00:29:15,633
I'm just going to leave that to set.
536
00:29:15,658 --> 00:29:17,943
Are you making anything in
particular, Judi?
537
00:29:17,968 --> 00:29:21,633
This is a tower of love.
538
00:29:21,658 --> 00:29:23,473
I'm going to craft something
beautiful.
539
00:29:23,498 --> 00:29:25,239
I think it's going to be a
ballerina.
540
00:29:25,264 --> 00:29:26,469
A ballerina?
541
00:29:29,134 --> 00:29:30,958
We're up to 98g.
542
00:29:30,983 --> 00:29:34,078
God, these little strawberries are
heavy, aren't they?
543
00:29:34,103 --> 00:29:35,719
How much does your ballerina weigh?
544
00:29:35,744 --> 00:29:37,989
She weighs 158.
545
00:29:38,014 --> 00:29:40,239
So, maybe I'll take off the arm.
546
00:29:44,374 --> 00:29:46,628
Oh, I mean, honestly, look at that
shit.
547
00:29:48,294 --> 00:29:49,599
Hasn't quite set, yet.
548
00:29:50,824 --> 00:29:51,958
No.
549
00:29:55,264 --> 00:29:58,719
I just want to make her tutu a
slightly different colour.
550
00:29:58,744 --> 00:30:00,159
So, you're rubbing jelly on it?
551
00:30:02,134 --> 00:30:03,439
1509-
552
00:30:04,903 --> 00:30:06,039
OK.
553
00:30:07,934 --> 00:30:09,239
Well, congratulations.
554
00:30:09,264 --> 00:30:10,628
Congratulations!
555
00:30:10,653 --> 00:30:11,799
Oh, my God.
556
00:30:13,134 --> 00:30:14,469
And that is for you.
557
00:30:15,824 --> 00:30:16,989
Well done.
558
00:30:17,014 --> 00:30:18,399
I mean, honestly.
559
00:30:18,424 --> 00:30:19,469
What does it say, Judi?
560
00:30:19,494 --> 00:30:20,828
I don't even want to talk.
561
00:30:20,853 --> 00:30:22,469
Do you want me to read it out?
562
00:30:22,494 --> 00:30:23,679
Yeah.
563
00:30:23,704 --> 00:30:25,989
Completely consume your beautiful
sculpture.
564
00:30:26,014 --> 00:30:27,078
Your time starts, now.
565
00:30:40,184 --> 00:30:41,519
Going for the arm next.
566
00:30:41,544 --> 00:30:42,628
The remaining arm.
567
00:30:42,653 --> 00:30:44,119
Bit more hair...
568
00:30:45,824 --> 00:30:48,519
It's not fair because the chewy
sweets...
569
00:30:48,544 --> 00:30:50,088
are really chewy.
570
00:30:50,113 --> 00:30:51,519
OK, I'm going for it.
571
00:31:04,653 --> 00:31:05,878
Egg shell?
572
00:31:05,903 --> 00:31:06,958
No.
573
00:31:08,733 --> 00:31:10,239
I feel I could've done better.
574
00:31:16,344 --> 00:31:17,708
Judi, I put it to you,
575
00:31:17,733 --> 00:31:20,269
you just made a big pile of things
you'd like to eat.
576
00:31:20,294 --> 00:31:22,839
Yeah. Do you want to see it? We've
got a picture of it. There it is.
577
00:31:22,863 --> 00:31:24,199
Oh, look at that!
578
00:31:25,504 --> 00:31:27,838
If someone sent that you as a
pudding... You'd like that.
579
00:31:27,863 --> 00:31:30,169
I mean, I'd argue that perhaps Ardal
was a little braver
580
00:31:30,194 --> 00:31:31,169
with his creation.
581
00:31:31,194 --> 00:31:33,479
Yeah, ambitious. Anastasia is what
you called it.
582
00:31:33,504 --> 00:31:35,239
Anastasia, yeah. Here's Anastasia.
583
00:31:40,733 --> 00:31:44,529
She's a former ballerina, obviously.
Of course.
584
00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:48,239
And to get the rosy face of a dancer
in her prime,
585
00:31:48,264 --> 00:31:52,069
why not rub a bit of jelly on some
tofu? Why not?
586
00:31:52,094 --> 00:31:53,559
Right, we have to stop now
587
00:31:53,584 --> 00:31:56,838
because Alex needs to have a wee
every 15 minutes. Sorry!
588
00:32:06,754 --> 00:32:09,289
Hello, welcome back to part four of
four.
589
00:32:09,314 --> 00:32:13,259
Yes, and this summary is especially
for one lucky viewer.
590
00:32:13,284 --> 00:32:15,568
It's for Peter from Guildford. Hi,
Pete.
591
00:32:15,593 --> 00:32:17,459
So, Peter, before the break,
592
00:32:17,484 --> 00:32:20,539
the cast were each making a 150g
food sculpture.
593
00:32:20,564 --> 00:32:22,898
It was then revealed they also had
to eat it.
594
00:32:22,923 --> 00:32:25,289
Mm, it seems pretty obvious now,
doesn't it, Pete?
595
00:32:25,314 --> 00:32:28,419
Finally, two more people, who wish
they'd seen it coming...
596
00:32:28,444 --> 00:32:30,849
It's the hindsight duo of Bridget
and Sophie.
597
00:32:30,874 --> 00:32:33,129
Big up the Guildford massive, Pete.
Here we go.
598
00:32:36,234 --> 00:32:38,979
This is... Wow.
599
00:32:43,284 --> 00:32:44,419
Butter.
600
00:32:45,564 --> 00:32:46,898
Hmm...
601
00:32:46,923 --> 00:32:50,898
I've got to get a baby and a breast
and a nipple out of all of that.
602
00:32:50,923 --> 00:32:52,698
Let's pop it in there.
603
00:32:54,284 --> 00:32:56,339
I've got nothing to do, now.
604
00:32:56,364 --> 00:32:58,648
What have you begun to sculpt,
Sophie?
605
00:32:58,673 --> 00:33:01,729
It's like a still life...
606
00:33:01,754 --> 00:33:03,179
of the human body.
607
00:33:03,204 --> 00:33:05,499
I thought it'd be quite stressful,
this job,
608
00:33:05,524 --> 00:33:07,209
but it's really relaxing, isn't it?
609
00:33:10,164 --> 00:33:11,698
Just one?
610
00:33:11,723 --> 00:33:13,419
How many do you have?
611
00:33:13,444 --> 00:33:15,179
Does that look like a baby?
612
00:33:18,593 --> 00:33:20,059
Oh.
613
00:33:20,084 --> 00:33:22,729
The nipples have browned, which is
quite sweet.
614
00:33:26,364 --> 00:33:29,089
Oh, sort of on a sea of milk.
615
00:33:29,114 --> 00:33:31,979
A baby and two breasts, yeah. Yeah.
616
00:33:32,004 --> 00:33:35,369
Have you heard of like a piece of
art called L'Origine Du Monde?
617
00:33:35,394 --> 00:33:37,648
No. OK.
618
00:33:37,673 --> 00:33:40,219
This is the clitoris, the grape.
619
00:33:40,244 --> 00:33:43,809
The bananas are the clitoral
wings... Lovely.
620
00:33:43,834 --> 00:33:47,089
And this is the vagina.
621
00:33:50,114 --> 00:33:52,419
Thank you, Sophie. Thank you so
much.
622
00:33:52,444 --> 00:33:53,578
Oh, Sophie. Mm-hm.
623
00:33:53,603 --> 00:33:56,259
Sorry, there's one more, before...
624
00:33:56,284 --> 00:33:57,549
Oh.
625
00:33:57,574 --> 00:33:59,259
Oh, no. I ca...
626
00:33:59,284 --> 00:34:00,698
No, I can't.
627
00:34:04,284 --> 00:34:05,809
This is entirely my own fault.
628
00:34:08,194 --> 00:34:09,698
It's delicious.
629
00:34:12,164 --> 00:34:13,499
Is it edible?
630
00:34:13,524 --> 00:34:14,939
Hmm...
631
00:34:14,964 --> 00:34:16,549
Don't make me eat it.
632
00:34:21,084 --> 00:34:22,979
It's a lot of butter.
633
00:34:23,004 --> 00:34:24,908
I have made a huge mistake.
634
00:34:26,364 --> 00:34:29,939
It's literally all on the roof of my
mouth.
635
00:34:29,964 --> 00:34:31,939
I feel if I can't eat this,
636
00:34:31,964 --> 00:34:35,269
then I will, like, send out quite a
negative message about...
637
00:34:35,294 --> 00:34:37,729
Like, I want to destigmatise this
kind of thing.
638
00:34:37,754 --> 00:34:42,089
Yeah, but equally, that's about 100g
of butter you're eating.
639
00:34:42,114 --> 00:34:43,778
It's really dry.
640
00:34:54,574 --> 00:34:56,379
I can't swallow it.
641
00:34:56,404 --> 00:34:58,698
Do you want me to get you a little
bag?
642
00:34:58,723 --> 00:34:59,778
Please.
643
00:34:59,803 --> 00:35:02,059
I think it's the flour...
644
00:35:02,084 --> 00:35:03,708
cos it hasn't cooked.
645
00:35:03,733 --> 00:35:05,349
You're not speaking very clearly.
646
00:35:15,844 --> 00:35:17,019
I've stopped the clock.
647
00:35:20,683 --> 00:35:23,269
Is there anything...?
648
00:35:23,294 --> 00:35:25,908
Shall I stop the clock? Yes, please.
Yes.
649
00:35:42,603 --> 00:35:44,299
It was so hard.
650
00:35:44,324 --> 00:35:45,859
So hard.
651
00:35:50,404 --> 00:35:53,349
Let me start with you, Bridget. The
miracle of childbirth.
652
00:35:53,374 --> 00:35:56,629
Do you feel you successfully
celebrated it via your sculpture?
653
00:35:56,654 --> 00:35:59,819
I do. The fact that our bodies
produce milk,
654
00:35:59,844 --> 00:36:04,708
that then, nourishes a child is one
of the most amazing things
655
00:36:04,733 --> 00:36:07,939
that humans, mammals do. I agree.
656
00:36:07,964 --> 00:36:11,379
Um... What better way to represent
it than with...
657
00:36:11,404 --> 00:36:16,019
a disembodied baby's head and two
floating bread boobs?
658
00:36:17,603 --> 00:36:18,989
Milk. And the milk.
659
00:36:20,733 --> 00:36:25,099
It's nice to see the female genitals
celebrated in quite so much detail.
660
00:36:25,124 --> 00:36:27,578
Thank you. It really does feel like
an evolution from
661
00:36:27,603 --> 00:36:30,429
us childishly drawing cock and balls
on windows,
662
00:36:30,454 --> 00:36:32,819
as I've done, I'm ashamed to say, so
many times.
663
00:36:34,404 --> 00:36:36,739
I mean, I just thought of the most
beautiful thing
664
00:36:36,764 --> 00:36:41,179
that I could imagine and I wanted it
to be educational like Chris.
665
00:36:41,204 --> 00:36:43,069
Yeah. What's the broccoli at the
bottom?
666
00:36:43,094 --> 00:36:45,379
That's the bum hole. Come on!
667
00:36:45,404 --> 00:36:48,269
Is it? Yeah, of course.
668
00:36:48,294 --> 00:36:51,788
You've got the vagina, you've got a
broccoli bum hole. Move on.
669
00:36:53,014 --> 00:36:55,349
Shall we deal with the eating first?
Yeah.
670
00:36:55,374 --> 00:36:56,509
Bridget ate the least.
671
00:36:56,534 --> 00:36:59,269
Out of 150g, she ate 8.
672
00:37:00,654 --> 00:37:04,509
Ardal's next. He ate 40g in
3 minutes 10 seconds.
673
00:37:04,534 --> 00:37:08,149
Chris ate all but 13g in
4:26 minutes.
674
00:37:08,174 --> 00:37:10,069
Sophie did eat all of hers.
675
00:37:10,094 --> 00:37:12,019
Some came out afterwards. I don't
know how much.
676
00:37:12,044 --> 00:37:14,349
I mean, she did consume it all in
3 minutes.
677
00:37:14,374 --> 00:37:15,459
This should be a big surprise
678
00:37:15,483 --> 00:37:18,849
as to ate the most of their
delicious pudding. Yes.
679
00:37:18,874 --> 00:37:21,329
Judi ate her dinner in 1:50 minutes,
so well done, Judi.
680
00:37:24,543 --> 00:37:26,079
Five points. Five points to Judi.
681
00:37:26,104 --> 00:37:28,799
Now, you've got to separate them in
terms of beauty. So, all five...
682
00:37:28,824 --> 00:37:31,129
Now, this is going to be a
minefield. Yes.
683
00:37:31,154 --> 00:37:32,648
All five here. Let's go.
684
00:37:32,673 --> 00:37:34,489
I can't see how that's
difficult.
685
00:37:34,514 --> 00:37:36,849
An ageing ballerina with only one
arm.
686
00:37:38,874 --> 00:37:43,929
Oh, if I place your tofu ballerina
above a vagina,
687
00:37:43,954 --> 00:37:45,209
I am finished.
688
00:37:47,543 --> 00:37:51,929
I cannot separate the beauty of the
solar system,
689
00:37:51,954 --> 00:37:56,289
a woman nurturing a child and a
vagina.
690
00:37:56,314 --> 00:37:58,688
And I want you to quote me on that.
691
00:38:00,713 --> 00:38:04,049
So, I'm going to give all three of
those beautiful things five points.
692
00:38:04,074 --> 00:38:05,369
Oh, right. Come on!
693
00:38:05,394 --> 00:38:07,768
So, five points to Bridget, Chris
and Sophie.
694
00:38:07,793 --> 00:38:10,259
And now, I must acknowledge...
695
00:38:10,284 --> 00:38:13,809
if I was in a restaurant, I'd
think that was beautiful. OK.
696
00:38:13,834 --> 00:38:16,129
But I can't, in good conscience,
697
00:38:16,154 --> 00:38:19,089
give it any more marks than a
one-armed ballerina.
698
00:38:21,904 --> 00:38:23,729
Four points each. And we're done.
699
00:38:23,754 --> 00:38:25,169
There we go, we're done.
700
00:38:25,194 --> 00:38:26,648
Five, five, five, four, four.
701
00:38:28,904 --> 00:38:30,129
What are the scores?
702
00:38:30,154 --> 00:38:32,009
Well, Ardal and Bridget have both
got 16,
703
00:38:32,034 --> 00:38:33,518
but at the top of the leader board,
704
00:38:33,543 --> 00:38:35,849
we've got Judi on 21, and then,
Sophie on 23.
705
00:38:35,874 --> 00:38:36,929
Uh'.!
706
00:38:38,194 --> 00:38:40,849
OK, everyone, time for you to head
to the stage
707
00:38:40,874 --> 00:38:42,809
for the final task of the show!
708
00:38:51,803 --> 00:38:53,009
All right, my love?
709
00:38:53,034 --> 00:38:54,489
Who's going to read it out?
710
00:38:54,514 --> 00:38:56,979
I'm going to ask Sophie Duker to
read it out.
711
00:38:57,004 --> 00:39:00,619
Build the tallest tower of toilet
rolls in front of your spot.
712
00:39:00,644 --> 00:39:02,929
You have 100 seconds.
713
00:39:02,954 --> 00:39:07,339
After 100 seconds, you will throw
both of your shoes at the towers
714
00:39:07,364 --> 00:39:09,648
one at a time from the throwing
spot.
715
00:39:09,673 --> 00:39:11,059
Down there, on the stage.
716
00:39:11,084 --> 00:39:13,889
Whoever builds the tallest tower
will throw first.
717
00:39:13,914 --> 00:39:17,448
The tallest toilet roll tower after
all shoes are thrown wins.
718
00:39:17,473 --> 00:39:18,889
So, there's a bit of tactics here.
719
00:39:18,914 --> 00:39:21,778
The person, who's got the highest
tower, has to throw first.
720
00:39:21,803 --> 00:39:23,698
So, if you've got the smallest
tower,
721
00:39:23,723 --> 00:39:26,698
maybe yours will still be standing,
when you get to throw.
722
00:39:26,723 --> 00:39:28,698
Oh, God, it's like chess.
723
00:39:30,473 --> 00:39:32,289
OK, your 100 seconds starts...
724
00:39:34,834 --> 00:39:36,729
Different styles already, Greg.
725
00:39:36,754 --> 00:39:37,929
Who's...?
726
00:39:39,114 --> 00:39:43,448
I think Chris is giving the thrower
a thin target.
727
00:39:43,473 --> 00:39:45,729
The audience are enjoying it, Greg.
728
00:39:46,964 --> 00:39:48,059
Oh, yeah.
729
00:39:48,084 --> 00:39:49,448
YES!
730
00:39:53,334 --> 00:39:54,889
I mean, Chris' is beautiful.
731
00:39:54,914 --> 00:39:57,528
Ramsey's going to stick this on his
chin, afterwards.
732
00:39:59,114 --> 00:40:00,729
20 seconds left.
733
00:40:07,553 --> 00:40:08,809
Uh'.!
734
00:40:08,834 --> 00:40:13,809
Five, four, three, two, one.
735
00:40:15,324 --> 00:40:16,969
Step away, step away.
736
00:40:16,994 --> 00:40:18,139
Step back.
737
00:40:20,114 --> 00:40:22,019
That is incredible.
738
00:40:22,044 --> 00:40:23,339
That's going down. Wow.
739
00:40:25,084 --> 00:40:27,609
It is incredible but it's a
high-risk strategy.
740
00:40:27,634 --> 00:40:28,778
Oh, course, it is.
741
00:40:28,803 --> 00:40:31,578
Yeah, I... Yeah, I'm not even
bothered I enjoyed doing that.
742
00:40:32,884 --> 00:40:35,219
The tallest tower is clearly Chris
Ramsey,
743
00:40:35,244 --> 00:40:37,844
so, please, make your way down
to the throwing spot, Chris Ramsey.
744
00:40:43,524 --> 00:40:45,809
So, yeah, if you do feel worried
about your safety,
745
00:40:45,834 --> 00:40:47,249
you can step back if you want.
746
00:40:47,274 --> 00:40:49,609
Chris, whose... whose tower...
747
00:40:49,634 --> 00:40:52,499
Whose tower are you going to...? Who
are you most threatened by, Chris?
748
00:40:52,524 --> 00:40:54,499
I think Sophie's a force to be
reckoned with,
749
00:40:54,524 --> 00:40:55,939
so I'm going to aim for Sophie's.
750
00:40:55,964 --> 00:40:58,778
OK, well, good luck. She's the only
one, who hasn't stepped back.
751
00:41:00,084 --> 00:41:01,528
I want to go down with my tower.
752
00:41:01,553 --> 00:41:03,059
Yeah.
753
00:41:03,084 --> 00:41:05,739
If you want to throw a shoe...
754
00:41:05,764 --> 00:41:06,969
Don't do that.
755
00:41:06,994 --> 00:41:08,249
Don't do that.
756
00:41:08,274 --> 00:41:10,609
I'll be gutted, if I hit you with
a shoe. Please?
757
00:41:10,634 --> 00:41:12,634
I'll be that guy, who hit that girl
with that shoe.
758
00:41:13,844 --> 00:41:14,939
Oh, my God.
759
00:41:17,634 --> 00:41:19,019
Ready? Yeah.
760
00:41:19,044 --> 00:41:20,528
Oh, my God.
761
00:41:22,964 --> 00:41:24,658
Have you got magic powers?!
762
00:41:26,994 --> 00:41:28,139
OK.
763
00:41:30,764 --> 00:41:32,099
0h!
764
00:41:32,124 --> 00:41:33,379
Oh!
765
00:41:37,454 --> 00:41:39,788
That is top plac e Psy
h some ology_ Oh, my
766
00:41:39,813 --> 00:41:43,328
So, the second tallest tower is
Sophie Duker.
767
00:41:43,353 --> 00:41:45,658
Please, come down to the throwing
spot.
768
00:41:45,683 --> 00:41:47,099
I wonder who she'll aim for.
769
00:41:47,124 --> 00:41:49,099
She's going to shatter my tower.
770
00:41:50,844 --> 00:41:53,939
These are boots. Boots now, Greg.
771
00:41:55,884 --> 00:41:57,328
I don't give a shit.
772
00:42:00,563 --> 00:42:03,019
Good luck, Sophie. Whose tower are
you aiming at?
773
00:42:03,044 --> 00:42:04,578
The boys'.
774
00:42:04,603 --> 00:42:06,069
Oh, dear me.
775
00:42:07,244 --> 00:42:08,509
Watch your feet.
776
00:42:08,534 --> 00:42:09,708
Sophie!
777
00:42:13,044 --> 00:42:14,429
No!
778
00:42:16,964 --> 00:42:18,509
Wm'- Oh. my God'.!
779
00:42:20,764 --> 00:42:22,619
I'm so sorry! Oh, my God!
780
00:42:25,124 --> 00:42:28,379
Ardal, avert your eyes. She's an
animal.
781
00:42:28,404 --> 00:42:30,819
The trouble is, Sophie, you are now
the tallest tower.
782
00:42:30,844 --> 00:42:33,588
If you'd left that up, other people
wouldn't be aiming for you.
783
00:42:33,613 --> 00:42:35,619
It's like chess.
784
00:42:41,683 --> 00:42:42,979
Arghg
785
00:42:43,004 --> 00:42:44,619
Oh, now, you fuck up!
786
00:42:47,644 --> 00:42:49,509
Greg, it's time for Ardal O'Hanlon.
787
00:42:52,844 --> 00:42:55,699
Ardal, currently the second highest
tower. Sophie's the highest.
788
00:42:55,724 --> 00:43:00,099
Look at this. Ardal, Ardal! This is
a man, who's throw shoes before.
789
00:43:00,124 --> 00:43:02,458
Well, you know what? Cos I love
everyone equally,
790
00:43:02,483 --> 00:43:04,379
I'm going to just throw it at
random.
791
00:43:04,404 --> 00:43:06,869
Ooh! No!
792
00:43:06,894 --> 00:43:08,869
No, I'm not. Hah!
793
00:43:10,204 --> 00:43:12,509
I'm going to throw it at Sophie.
No, no!
794
00:43:12,534 --> 00:43:13,534
Arghg
795
00:43:14,693 --> 00:43:16,379
You've got a force field!
796
00:43:16,404 --> 00:43:17,739
Same again or...?
797
00:43:17,764 --> 00:43:19,309
You're going to target me twice?
798
00:43:19,334 --> 00:43:21,149
Take your time. Decimate it, come
on.
799
00:43:21,174 --> 00:43:22,338
No, no!
800
00:43:24,124 --> 00:43:25,788
Ooh!
801
00:43:25,813 --> 00:43:27,739
Underarm.
802
00:43:27,764 --> 00:43:28,979
Uh'.!
803
00:43:29,004 --> 00:43:30,179
Oh!
804
00:43:30,204 --> 00:43:32,588
What a system!
805
00:43:32,613 --> 00:43:35,099
What a system!
806
00:43:35,124 --> 00:43:36,949
Sophie, an incredible performance,
so far.
807
00:43:36,974 --> 00:43:38,819
She is winning the episode,
remember. She is.
808
00:43:38,844 --> 00:43:40,619
Judi has never won an episode.
809
00:43:40,644 --> 00:43:42,979
The only contestant not to have won
one.
810
00:43:43,004 --> 00:43:45,458
Still left to throw, it's Bridget
Christie's turn.
811
00:43:45,483 --> 00:43:47,788
Any thoughts on your technique,
before you let rip?
812
00:43:47,813 --> 00:43:48,869
No.
813
00:43:55,534 --> 00:43:57,538
Ooh! That was close.
814
00:43:57,563 --> 00:43:59,259
Closer than me.
815
00:44:01,613 --> 00:44:03,389
Please, come back to the stage,
Bridget.
816
00:44:03,414 --> 00:44:05,899
Judi, please, head down to the
throwing spot.
817
00:44:05,924 --> 00:44:09,619
Can I just say, my shoes have no
leverage whatsoever?
818
00:44:09,644 --> 00:44:11,949
Well, look, Judi, this is huge for
you.
819
00:44:11,974 --> 00:44:12,980
If you can strike that tower,
820
00:44:13,004 --> 00:44:14,899
you've got every chance of winning
the show.
821
00:44:14,924 --> 00:44:17,229
Did you hear that? You could win
this episode.
822
00:44:17,254 --> 00:44:18,788
I'll give you my shoes, Judi.
823
00:44:18,813 --> 00:44:21,749
But how am I supposed to kill you
with your own shoes?
824
00:44:24,134 --> 00:44:26,619
Is it because you don't want to
touch shoes without gloves?
825
00:44:26,644 --> 00:44:28,259
Yes.
826
00:44:28,284 --> 00:44:31,109
Shall we get you a glove? Yes.
827
00:44:31,134 --> 00:44:34,029
I just don't like touching the
bottom of shoes.
828
00:44:34,054 --> 00:44:36,468
OK. Now, whoa, whoa! Think about
this, Judi.
829
00:44:36,493 --> 00:44:37,869
Who...? Where are you aiming at?
830
00:44:37,894 --> 00:44:40,229
No, Judi, Judi, Judi. You've got to
hit that one,
831
00:44:40,254 --> 00:44:42,750
if you want to win the show. Take
your time. Sophie, I'm so sorry.
832
00:44:42,774 --> 00:44:44,619
I'm worried she's going to hit her
own tower.
833
00:44:45,894 --> 00:44:47,619
Ooh!
834
00:44:47,644 --> 00:44:49,909
Sophie's tower.
835
00:44:53,054 --> 00:44:54,798
You can't win, if you kill me.
836
00:44:54,823 --> 00:44:57,389
What happened? Sophie's is the
tallest.
837
00:44:57,414 --> 00:45:00,909
Sophie's is the tallest. Yeah, that
was the practice, wasn't it, yeah?
838
00:45:02,414 --> 00:45:03,909
That's an end to it.
839
00:45:03,934 --> 00:45:06,229
We'll work out how that's affected
the final scores.
840
00:45:06,254 --> 00:45:07,654
Please, come and join me down here.
841
00:45:15,613 --> 00:45:17,879
What a show. High drama up there.
842
00:45:17,904 --> 00:45:19,629
High drama.
843
00:45:19,654 --> 00:45:23,668
Well, Chris, you were destroyed
instantly by the boot of Sophie.
844
00:45:23,693 --> 00:45:25,389
So, one point for the lowest tower.
845
00:45:25,414 --> 00:45:29,749
Judi and Bridget, you were the joint
third highest towers.
846
00:45:29,774 --> 00:45:31,029
You get three points each.
847
00:45:31,054 --> 00:45:34,548
Ardal remained unscathed — second
highest tower and four points.
848
00:45:34,573 --> 00:45:36,909
But Sophie's performance was
immaculate
849
00:45:36,934 --> 00:45:39,749
and she obviously gets the full five
points. Sophie Duker!
850
00:45:41,184 --> 00:45:42,309
And so...?
851
00:45:42,334 --> 00:45:45,798
And so, this was Judi's closest
chance so far to win an episode,
852
00:45:45,823 --> 00:45:48,309
and with 24 points, she comes
second.
853
00:45:48,334 --> 00:45:50,629
Sophie Duker gets 28 points and
comes first.
854
00:45:50,654 --> 00:45:51,829
There it is.
855
00:45:53,493 --> 00:45:57,348
Sorry. Sophie Duker is triumphant.
856
00:45:57,373 --> 00:46:00,709
Please, pace up to the stage and
poke your precious prizes.
857
00:46:05,014 --> 00:46:06,468
I'm destroyed.
858
00:46:06,493 --> 00:46:09,069
So, what have we learnt today?
859
00:46:09,094 --> 00:46:12,598
Well, today, has been a true
celebration of womankind.
860
00:46:12,623 --> 00:46:15,548
We've admired the miracle of
bringing life into the world.
861
00:46:15,573 --> 00:46:19,159
We've marvelled at the female form
and we'll never forget
862
00:46:19,184 --> 00:46:22,348
that some women can borrow a dog
whenever they want.
863
00:46:23,814 --> 00:46:26,109
Please, clap your hands with all
your might
864
00:46:26,134 --> 00:46:28,109
for tonight's winner, Sophie Duker!
865
00:46:33,014 --> 00:46:35,239
Subtitles by Red Bee Media
866
00:46:35,263 --> 00:46:37,263
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