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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,560 --> 00:00:06,920 Ha-ha! 2 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:08,440 No way! 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:12,000 Erm... Gosh! 4 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:13,320 Where's the hole? 5 00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:16,320 Blah! Urgh! 6 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:18,000 Uhh. Are you having a laugh? 7 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:25,200 GASPING 8 00:00:25,240 --> 00:00:27,880 APPLAUSE 9 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:36,440 Welcome, one and all, to Taskmaster. 10 00:00:36,480 --> 00:00:38,440 This is the new Olympics 11 00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:40,720 and I am the flaming torch running through your cities 12 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:42,480 and igniting your passion for tasks. 13 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,720 But who are these taskletes throwing themselves into 14 00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:47,120 the competition at the direct expense of their dignity, 15 00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:49,520 I hear you cry? 16 00:00:49,560 --> 00:00:52,640 Well, pipe down! I'll tell you. 17 00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:54,080 Wow. 18 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:55,680 LAUGHTER 19 00:00:55,720 --> 00:00:58,000 They are Ardal O'Hanlon... 20 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:01,720 ..Bridget Christie... 21 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:05,480 ..Chris Ramsey, 22 00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:07,800 Judi Love 23 00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:10,200 and Sophie Duker. 24 00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:16,040 And next to me - he's my assistant, he's consistent, 25 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:18,800 persistent and his bed has to be water resistant. 26 00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,160 It's little Alex Horne. 27 00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:23,400 APPLAUSE 28 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:24,880 I'll take that. 29 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:27,480 All right, then. 30 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:29,040 Oh, no, what a week it's been. 31 00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:30,400 Oh, has it? 32 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:32,880 A nightmare. Awful. Oh, gosh, what's happened in your week? 33 00:01:32,920 --> 00:01:35,320 Well, I was shopping on the internet, as you know I love to do. 34 00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:36,520 I know you do. 35 00:01:36,560 --> 00:01:38,960 Oh, and I accidentally clicked "select all" on Amazon. 36 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:41,440 I've got everything. Bought everything. 37 00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:43,160 Disaster. I've got most of it here. 38 00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:45,400 I've got like a meat thermometer. 39 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:48,280 Got lots of stuff, do you want to see? Yeah, I do want to see. 40 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:49,960 I've got like a Bunsen burner. 41 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:53,960 Uh, got, uh, got a one-egg... One-egg frying pan. 42 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,160 Lots of stuff. 43 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,440 What terrifies me about this is you'll have thought 44 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:00,160 of this hilarious joke. Hmm? 45 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:02,760 And then you will have brought in actual things from your home. 46 00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:07,000 For want of a more sophisticated response, 47 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,160 the guy's a prick. 48 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,160 Right, Prize Task time. Let's crack on. 49 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:12,480 Yes, I suppose so, 50 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:14,440 and I suppose the category for episode three is 51 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:17,640 the item that sounds funniest when you say its name over 52 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:19,440 and over again. 53 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:22,240 OK? So we're going to hear some words said quite a lot 54 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,640 and I, for one, am laughing already. 55 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,480 The one that tickles the Taskmaster the most will get five points. 56 00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:29,200 Now, at the end of the show, some lucky, 57 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:31,440 lucky person will take home five items that are funny 58 00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:33,160 to say their names of lots of times. 59 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:34,960 Right. Hello, Sophie. Hello. 60 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:36,400 Have you brought in a funny word? 61 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:41,280 I've brought in some perfectly ordinary tweezers. 62 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:43,720 Here they are. Here are the tweezers here. There they are. 63 00:02:43,760 --> 00:02:46,960 They're tweezers for the tweezing of a specific avian creature - 64 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,480 the pheasant. Ah. Here's the pheasant. 65 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:52,040 She's brought that in as well. Here's a real pheasant. 66 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:54,680 God, they're not how I've imagined them. Yeah. 67 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:56,520 So they're not actually tweezers, 68 00:02:56,560 --> 00:02:58,520 they're actually pheasant pluckers. 69 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:00,840 And there are the pheasant pluckers. 70 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:02,240 GROANING 71 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:05,640 Yeah, the groan is the correct response. 72 00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:07,040 Let's go. What, oh, you want me to... 73 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:08,960 You want me to say it? The purpose of this task is 74 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,320 you've brought in your funny word, now I want to see if.... 75 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,000 Oh, I thought you were going to say it. No. 76 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:16,200 Pheasant plucker, pheasant plucker, pheasant plucker! Pheasant plucker. 77 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,320 HE BEATBOXES He's not a pheasant plucker! 78 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:23,400 I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it far more than I thought I was going to. 79 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:25,920 Chris. What's your, uh, word? 80 00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,840 Wow. Um, I have brought in this. 81 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:32,680 IN NORTHERN ACCENT: And this is a cook book. 82 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,680 This is a regional response. 83 00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:37,040 Cook book. 84 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:41,000 LAUGHTER 85 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:44,160 It is quite good. 86 00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:46,960 I... I would argue he could bring in most things. 87 00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,160 LAUGHTER 88 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:51,640 Let's go, Chris. 89 00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:54,560 Cook book. Cook book? Cook book. Cook book. Cook book? 90 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:57,160 Cook book. Cook book! Cook book. 91 00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,240 I don't know whether it's cook... It's not bad. 92 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:03,320 Cook book or whether it's his cheeky Geordie smile that's there. 93 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:05,040 Right, Ardal, what have you brought in? 94 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,080 I've brought in bubbles! 95 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,280 GREG GASPS Yes, here they are. 96 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,360 MUMBLING 97 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:12,800 Bubbles, bubbles, bubbles. 98 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:15,440 If you're angry, even you go, "Bubbles!" 99 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:18,280 Like, it's still funny and kind of makes you less angry, 100 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:21,560 or if you're... If you're sad and you go, "Bubbles." 101 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:24,680 Would you mind going through 102 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,240 the full range of emotions while you repeat the word bubbles? 103 00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:29,720 Perhaps you could start on angry and work towards joyful. 104 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:33,160 Let's say you can't find any crisps or something and you go, "Bubbles!" 105 00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:34,200 Yeah. OK. 106 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:38,520 And then you get morose and your blood sugars go down and... 107 00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:39,840 SADLY: "Bubbles." 108 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,800 LAUGHTER 109 00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:44,600 But it... It's what it conjures up! 110 00:04:44,640 --> 00:04:48,160 I mean, it conjures up children's parties and champagne and hot tubs. 111 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:51,240 Yeah! And, you know, sipping champagne in the hot tub. Yes! 112 00:04:51,280 --> 00:04:53,640 And farting in the hot tub. "More bubbles!" Yeah. Wow. 113 00:04:53,680 --> 00:04:55,840 ARDAL AND GREG: Bubbles on bubbles! 114 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:57,400 Uh, Judi. 115 00:04:57,440 --> 00:04:58,760 Yes. 116 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,120 What thing have you brought in? 117 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:02,400 I've brought in pickles. 118 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:04,120 Yes, a jar of pickles. 119 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:06,000 LAUGHTER There we go. 120 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:08,240 So it's not a bad prize haul so far. It's not bad. 121 00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:10,160 Who doesn't like a lovely pickle? Exactly. 122 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:12,880 Ah, well, I look forward to you repeatedly saying the word pickle. 123 00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:15,440 SING-SONG: Pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, 124 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:18,120 pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle! Hmm. 125 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:20,560 Pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, 126 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,680 pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle. 127 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,560 Would you mind slowing... Me said pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, 128 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:27,080 pickle, pickle, pickle. 129 00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:29,480 Me said pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, 130 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:30,920 pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle. 131 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:34,480 Me said I want the pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle, pickle. 132 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:36,760 Surely that gets a damn point or something. 133 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:39,360 It's got something. It's got something! 134 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:42,640 Bridget, you've got your work cut out. 135 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:44,440 Stopcock. 136 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:48,120 Yes, she's brought, I think for the first time in TV quiz history, 137 00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:50,440 the winner will win a stopcock. Right. 138 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:51,960 There it is. 139 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,760 I put it to you, Bridget, that 140 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:56,720 you've deliberately chosen a stopcock 141 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:58,560 because it's got the word cock in it. 142 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,960 And, therefore, you've lowered yourself to my level. 143 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:04,480 LAUGHTER I want to hear stopcock repeatedly. 144 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:08,040 Stopcock, st-stopcock, stop COCK, stop, stopcock, stop... 145 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:10,080 Babes, don't go on your knees. Stopcock, stop... 146 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,280 SOPHIE: No, no, no, no. 147 00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:14,800 Stopcock... LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH 148 00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:19,400 Stop, stopcock! Stop, stopcock, stop, stopcock. 149 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:22,880 Stopcock! Stopcock! LAUGHTER 150 00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:24,840 Stopcock. 151 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,840 Stopcock! Stop, stopcock! 152 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:29,520 STOPCOCK! 153 00:06:29,560 --> 00:06:30,960 Get back. Get back! 154 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,400 Get the fire marshall in! Stop! 155 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,880 Shut the show down! 156 00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:38,080 Stopcock. ARDAL: And now... 157 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:40,640 And now, sorry, just to defuse the tension in the room, 158 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:42,560 could we all just say, "Bubbles." 159 00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:45,000 Yeah, ha-ha, ha-ha.Bubbles! LAUGHTER 160 00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:46,960 Right, Greg. Points? 161 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:49,200 I'm sorry, pleasant fucker didn't do it for me. 162 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:51,000 Pleasant fucker? Come on. 163 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:54,640 LAUGHTER Ah! 164 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,160 Oh! Yes! 165 00:06:57,520 --> 00:06:59,600 She's got you. She got you. 166 00:06:59,640 --> 00:07:00,800 She got me. She got me good. 167 00:07:00,840 --> 00:07:03,040 I'm going to have to take her up from bottom place. 168 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:04,760 Ah. What? Wow. 169 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:07,320 I'm going to give Sophie two points. Yes, yes. 170 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,920 I'm going to give cook book and bubbles three points each. 171 00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:12,400 OK, so joint third, we have Ardal and Chris. 172 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:14,240 Pickles got me straight away. Mmm. 173 00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,560 But now I feel I was battered down by stopcock. 174 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:17,880 Well... 175 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,360 Um, four points to stopcock. 176 00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:21,840 Pickles was a pure attempt. She takes the five. 177 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:23,120 Five points to Judi Love. 178 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:24,640 Right, we're off. 179 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:28,640 Right. What's first, Alex? 180 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:31,160 Well, the cast are going to teach you a lesson, Greg. 181 00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,600 A history lesson. Ooh. 182 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,120 Hello. 183 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:50,720 Oh, hello, Judi. Hello, Sophie. 184 00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:53,360 Hello, Alex. 185 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:54,880 You look nice. Pardon? 186 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:56,560 You look nice. SHE MUMBLES 187 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:58,600 You've never said that before. Thank you. 188 00:07:58,640 --> 00:07:59,840 I've never thought it before. 189 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:02,720 I'm very good at finding the actual task. 190 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:08,240 "Accurately and emotionally recreate a great moment from history." 191 00:08:08,280 --> 00:08:10,160 "Using these two traffic cones." 192 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:14,880 "Most accurate and emotional recreation wins." 193 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:17,000 "You've got 30 minutes." 194 00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:19,120 "Your time starts now." 195 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:21,080 Oh, my God. 196 00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:22,560 You know your history? 197 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,080 It's just everything that's not now, isn't it? 198 00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:29,440 Ahh. Something from history. 199 00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:30,840 Joan of Arc. 200 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,360 Martin Luther King or... 201 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:34,640 I'm free. 202 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:40,960 I was thinking about doing the moment from the VMAs. 203 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:44,200 Maybe you be Janet Jackson and I'll be Justin Timberlake. 204 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:45,920 With the malfunction? Yeah. 205 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,240 That was a big moment. That was a big moment. 206 00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:50,440 Oh, I've got it. Ah. 207 00:08:50,480 --> 00:08:52,040 I'm going to need some props. 208 00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:56,160 Oh, I see what you mean. 209 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:57,360 Yeah. 210 00:08:57,400 --> 00:08:59,640 LAUGHTER 211 00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:07,080 History by your definition is everything that's not now. 212 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:10,800 But that... That's history now. What you just said is as well, now. 213 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:13,120 I mean... I mean... Is it everything that's not now? 214 00:09:13,160 --> 00:09:16,280 It's... It's not, no. History is recorded past. 215 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,240 History is recorded past? 216 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:19,760 Yeah. OK. 217 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:21,560 You get prehistory, which is before that. 218 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:23,000 Prehistoric. 219 00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:24,640 Hmm. That's why it's called that. 220 00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:26,520 LAUGHTER 221 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:30,000 It's... You just learn. You're always learning. 222 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:32,400 Shall we crack on and see which emotional parts 223 00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:34,160 of history they've decided to represent? 224 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,480 Yeah, I should say, it's not... 225 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,640 The part of history didn't need to be emotional, 226 00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:39,680 it's the recreation had to be emotional. Oh. 227 00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:41,080 And accurate, just so we know. 228 00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:43,040 All right, well, we're going to start with 229 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:44,880 the oldest person here by quite a bit, 230 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:46,920 so he has a clear advantage from the off. 231 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:50,160 It's Ardal O'Hanlon's recreation. Here we go. 232 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,920 DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS 233 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,160 IMITATION GUNFIRE 234 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:57,720 WHOOSHING NOISES 235 00:09:57,760 --> 00:09:59,160 HE IMITATES AIRCRAFT 236 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:00,320 IMITATION EXPLOSIONS 237 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:01,760 We must fight back! 238 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:03,640 IMITATION GUNFIRE 239 00:10:03,680 --> 00:10:06,320 Yes! The Germans, they're turning around! 240 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:08,880 HE ROARS 241 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:14,160 HE CHEERS 242 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:16,920 Let's see what's on the radio. 243 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:18,760 HE GURGLES 244 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:20,840 HE RANTS INDISTINCTLY 245 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:24,120 # It's a long way to Tipperary 246 00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:27,880 # It's a long way to go! # 247 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:29,800 HE SIGHS 248 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:31,920 Thank you, Ardal, I've learnt a lot. 249 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,280 Thank you. 250 00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:36,320 APPLAUSE 251 00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:42,960 It looked to me like a seven-year-old boy shouting 252 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,120 and playing army by himself. 253 00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:46,520 LAUGHTER 254 00:10:46,560 --> 00:10:47,960 Oh! 255 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,640 I mean, I... You're usually very fair, but on this occasion... 256 00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:53,600 THEY LAUGH 257 00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:55,600 Next, we're going a bit further back in time, 258 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,880 with Sophie Duker showing off one of her many voices. Here we go. 259 00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:00,320 CROAKING AND RUMBLING 260 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:02,080 Daddy, what's that sound? 261 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:04,800 It sounds like the Earth is hungry. GRUMBLING 262 00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:06,880 I can't hear anything. 263 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:11,000 Achoo! Everything smells like eggs, Daddy. What's going on? 264 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:13,040 Nothing to worry about. 265 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:16,480 You told me yesterday that the dinosaurs would live forever 266 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:21,160 and ever and ever and never go extinct. Is that true? 267 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:22,800 That's true. 268 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:26,600 RUMBLING 269 00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:28,720 DEEP GURGLING 270 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:31,120 Argh! 271 00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:32,520 Daddy! 272 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:35,000 Daddy! 273 00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:36,960 You're on fire! 274 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,720 Ahh. 275 00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:40,120 What's happening, Daddy? 276 00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:43,120 You look like you're in unimaginable amounts of pain. 277 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:44,560 Ahhh. 278 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,920 Don't leave me, Daddy. No. No! 279 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:50,760 Ahhh. Oh, God! 280 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,160 No! 281 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:55,560 APPLAUSE 282 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:00,440 A very... A very ambitious application of the use of the cones. 283 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,400 Yeah. A lot of digital stuff, though. 284 00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:05,040 I don't know about the use of the cones. Just had to get that in. 285 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:06,400 Yep. Wow. 286 00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:08,640 But can I just say, can I... can I just add I think that is 287 00:12:08,680 --> 00:12:13,000 a fantastic moment, Sophie, from prehistory. I think it's wonderful. 288 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,440 What! OK. All right. 289 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,880 I just... LAUGHTER 290 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,360 No. 291 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,320 The man makes a good point and I... This, no... 292 00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:23,840 And I've only learnt this today. 293 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:25,920 We only learnt this today. 294 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:29,480 Well, we-we-we could debate whether it's history or not for a long time. 295 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:33,040 I'll make a snap decision, fair or not, within minutes. 296 00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,480 THEY LAUGH 297 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,560 But now let's drill down into the narrative. 298 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:39,440 I enjoyed the SFX. I enjoyed the bubbling lava. Mm. 299 00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:42,920 The only thing I question is the characters within the piece. 300 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:46,360 Yeah. I wonder why your character was, dare I say it, 301 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,160 a little irritating. 302 00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,400 SHE LAUGHS 303 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:53,040 I just... I didn't want it to be too, too sad. 304 00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:55,840 Tick. Cos it's, yeah, OK. No, it was, it was very sad. 305 00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:58,440 But, I mean, like, I think everyone here, 306 00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:01,440 whether they're a dinosaur or not, has a fear of going extinct. 307 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,920 I just found with that character, I sort of was glad 308 00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,440 she was getting made extinct. 309 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,480 DRUMMING 310 00:13:11,840 --> 00:13:14,000 You heard the drums! It's the end of part one. 311 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:16,000 APPLAUSE 312 00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,960 APPLAUSE 313 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,040 Hello, again. 314 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:33,960 Welcome back to Taskmaster, where we are time travelling. 315 00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:35,280 Ooh, we certainly are. 316 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:36,960 Our five comics have been busy 317 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,560 recreating moments in history using two traffic cones. 318 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:44,200 Now it's time for a bit of unnatural history with Dr Chris Ramsey. 319 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,560 Hmm. Good day. 320 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:48,680 You join me on a historic day for myself and everyone in my field. 321 00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:51,920 I am a scientist from Edinburgh University and today, 322 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,320 we finally did it. 323 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:56,320 The first time we've cloned from an adult somatic cell 324 00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,240 using nuclear transfer, 325 00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:00,000 we've cloned a sheep. 326 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:03,640 This is Dolly the Sheep. 327 00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:05,640 Didn't name that one. No-one gives a shit. 328 00:14:05,680 --> 00:14:07,960 This is Dolly the Sheep that we've cloned. 329 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,520 Have we gone too far? 330 00:14:09,560 --> 00:14:11,640 SOMBRE MUSIC PLAYS 331 00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:12,840 Has science gone too far? 332 00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:14,280 Should I be playing god? 333 00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:15,520 I don't know. 334 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,720 HE SOBS 335 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:26,320 APPLAUSE 336 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:27,760 Nice. 337 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:30,440 The cloning of Dolly the Sheep. 338 00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:32,480 Because the cones were the same. 339 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:33,760 Oh, I see. Identical, them. 340 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:36,080 Yeah, yeah, they were. Stuck some cotton wool on 'em, 341 00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,080 job's a good 'un. Um... 342 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:41,160 But I... I seem to remember that Dolly had a head. 343 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,080 LAUGHTER 344 00:14:43,120 --> 00:14:46,640 Sorry, sorry, are you claiming that your cone looked more like 345 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:51,280 a tank than mine looked like a sheep? 346 00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:54,000 I've never seen a cylindrical sheep, I just... 347 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:56,560 Right. So it was... 348 00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:58,600 It was inaccurate, but it was emotional - 349 00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:00,960 is that what we're saying? He definitely was emotional. 350 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,200 Mm-hm. Yeah. 351 00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:04,840 I just don't remember on the task where it said about emotional. 352 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:07,920 What... That statement makes me look forward to yours 353 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,320 more than you can imagine. Who's next? 354 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,640 Uh, it's time for a bit of Bridget Chr-istory. 355 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:13,880 SHE SNIGGERS 356 00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:19,960 LO-FI MUSIC PLAYS 357 00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:24,160 IN RUSSIAN ACCENT:It is Day Three in the capsule. 358 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:29,360 It's quite lonely here but trying to keep my nerve 359 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:33,480 because if I panic, I don't have really have anywhere to go. 360 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:42,000 My heart is beating, but you know however frightened I get, 361 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:46,600 I keep telling myself that I have just orbited the Earth 362 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:49,320 and, you know, not many people from my socio-economic background 363 00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,840 get to orbit a nice ball, let alone Earth. 364 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:56,320 I just need to be brave. 365 00:15:56,360 --> 00:16:01,160 I would think of my mother, but I'm a stray, so I don't have mother. 366 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:07,720 My name is Laika, and, now, I'm ready to die. 367 00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:11,000 APPLAUSE 368 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:14,560 Yeah? Yeah, a little one. Wow! Just a... 369 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,440 LAUGHTER 370 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:19,240 Street dog, no mother, and sent up to burn. 371 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,200 SIGHING 372 00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,320 Was that why you put a pot lid... 373 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:26,040 LAUGHTER 374 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:27,480 It's all I had. 375 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,880 What was the name of the dog, Laiko? Laika. Laika. 376 00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:31,480 What did happen to Laika? 377 00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:32,880 It's exactly that. 378 00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:35,560 One orbit and then died from the heat. 379 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:38,160 Oh, no. Poor Laika! I did like her. 380 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,360 LAUGHTER 381 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:45,600 A fitting tribute. 382 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:49,000 I'm just a bit, like, overwhelmed with, like, like, 383 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:52,560 how much props and digital stuff everybody else... 384 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,600 CHRIS GUFFAWS 385 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:57,120 Judi, I cannot wait to see yours. 386 00:16:58,640 --> 00:17:00,920 Well, here we go, then. It's the return of the Ju-di. 387 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:02,320 The J-J... The... The Judi. 388 00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:05,320 EPIC ENTRANCE MUSIC PLAYS 389 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:13,120 BIRDS SQUAWK 390 00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:16,600 MYSTERIOUS ADVENTURE MUSIC PLAYS 391 00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:18,040 That's how they did it. 392 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,280 EPIC CRESCENDO 393 00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:36,440 What is it? 394 00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:37,920 It's the pyramids. 395 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:41,440 I'm an Egyptian queen and I've built pyramids. 396 00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:48,760 Thanks, Judi. Oh, what's your name? 397 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,000 Nefertiti. 398 00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:54,840 Yeah? Yeah. 399 00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,200 Thanks. 400 00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:01,320 APPLAUSE 401 00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:05,080 Yeah, I can see why you were so vocal during the others. 402 00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:08,000 Well, it's just...it's an emotional thing for me, you know? 403 00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:10,840 If you say to me, as a black woman, tell us about your history, 404 00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:12,760 I mean, hmm! Dark road, isn't it? 405 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,800 Do you know who built... built the pyramids? 406 00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:17,360 Wait, they didn't ask about it. They just... 407 00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,920 I'm just saying you sort of glamorised slavery there. 408 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:21,160 That's what you... 409 00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:23,200 You wanted emotion, right? 410 00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:24,320 Yeah. 411 00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:26,800 WAVERINGLY: And that... Those two cones up there... 412 00:18:26,840 --> 00:18:28,080 There we go. 413 00:18:28,120 --> 00:18:31,720 ..really demonstrated heartache - 414 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:34,120 like Sophie's just said. 415 00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:42,040 And the fact that my art draws the emotion after I've done it, 416 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:46,160 with just simple sand, 417 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,200 and a fucking crown... 418 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:51,360 What else do you need? GREG CHUCKLES 419 00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:53,680 I tell you what you need, one point. 420 00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:56,120 LAUGHTER 421 00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:58,800 And you can thank me for it. 422 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:00,240 Fucking rubbish! 423 00:19:00,280 --> 00:19:02,440 LAUGHTER 424 00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:07,800 One to Judi. Two... 425 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:08,800 I'm sorry. 426 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:10,240 I wasn't moved by Dolly the Sheep. 427 00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:12,400 I'm sorry, Chris, I've given you two. 428 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:15,520 Even though it was prehistory and the dinosaur was annoying, 429 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:19,160 I'm giving Sophie three points because of the ambition of it. 430 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,480 Because playing army by himself brought about 431 00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:24,640 such an emotional reaction in Ardal... 432 00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:27,160 I cried for you! ..I'm giving him four points. 433 00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,480 Four points to Ardal O'Hanlon. And I'm standing by it. 434 00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:31,960 Can't believe it. I don't think anyone will argue with me - 435 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,640 five sweet, sweet points go to the emotional recreation of 436 00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:37,360 the loss of Laika the Dog. And that's an end to it! 437 00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:39,280 Bridget Christie gets all five. 438 00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:45,680 Right, let's have a look at the controversial scoreboard. 439 00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,920 Bridget is in the lead with nine points! 440 00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:50,240 APPLAUSE 441 00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:55,520 Let's have another one. 442 00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:57,880 And it's good news - it's an annoying task! 443 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,160 Ooh! Gosh. 444 00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:17,920 Hi, Alex. 445 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,560 Toys. 446 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,240 You like toys? I do like toys. 447 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:23,160 Can I? 448 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:26,160 Anything you want to say to me about this task? 449 00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:28,040 No. 450 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:31,520 "Make a..." Oh, God. Oh, God. OK. 451 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:34,840 "Make all of these things happen at the same time." 452 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:37,240 "The monsters must be squatting." 453 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,200 "The robot must be walking." 454 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,920 ALL, OVERLAPPING: The marble must be rolling. 455 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:47,280 CHRIS & JUDI: The cradle must be clicking. 456 00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:51,160 ALL: The sand must be falling. 457 00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:53,600 CHRIS & ARDAL: The fidget spinner must be spinning. 458 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,080 SOPHIE: The candles must be... ALL: ..out. 459 00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:58,440 BOTH: You must applaud when you think you've finished. 460 00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:00,040 ALL: Fastest wins. 461 00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:01,280 Time starts now. 462 00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,640 APPLAUSE 463 00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:08,920 And I found just the task itself to be irritating. 464 00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:10,120 Yes, yes. Um... 465 00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:11,480 Let's crack on, I say. Off we go. 466 00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:14,880 OK. We're going to start with three of them, A, B, C - 467 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:18,640 Ardal, Bridget and Sophie with a C. Here we go. 468 00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:22,280 SING-SONG: OK, so, how do you make this guy walk? 469 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:24,800 How do you make him walk? 470 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:27,600 OK, I'm going to start with this guy. Wait, where's, where's the... 471 00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:29,200 Where's the, where's the hole?! 472 00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:45,440 OK, what is it... OK. OK! 473 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:50,600 Oh, great. 474 00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:52,040 OK, stop. 475 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:56,960 HE LAUGHS 476 00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:01,360 Why were you saying stop? 477 00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:04,320 Because everything was happening that was supposed to. 478 00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:06,400 Have you read the task properly? 479 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:07,760 I don't know. 480 00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:12,640 OK, I'm going to sit on these. Right. 481 00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,040 Squatting. 482 00:22:16,080 --> 00:22:17,480 We have three squatters. 483 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,440 Three squatters. Two squatters. 484 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,080 You stay, or I'll smash you to pieces! 485 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:25,560 I've not got long left on the candles. 486 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:33,360 Out, clicking, spinning, rolling. 487 00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,160 I've stopped the clock. 488 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:36,560 SHE SIGHS 489 00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:40,120 AUDIENCE OOHS 490 00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:50,960 He's still going. Yeah! 491 00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:57,920 Argh. 492 00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:04,920 Just imagine that if you don't do this, someone will take my cat. 493 00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:15,080 It's these, it's these. I hate these! 494 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,200 It's OK. It's all OK. 495 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:27,240 APPLAUSE 496 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:34,160 Well, it seemed to me that the only person who had 497 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:35,640 any kind of system was Sophie. 498 00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:38,160 She at least tried to stand on the jumpy-up things. 499 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:39,360 Yeah, that was clever. 500 00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:41,520 I sensed blind panic in you two. You may disagree... 501 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,560 Not at all. I was glad I couldn't do it. 502 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,440 LAUGHTER 503 00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:49,040 You generated some nice quotes for the Taskmaster quote book. 504 00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:51,560 "You stay or I'll smash you to pieces." 505 00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:55,520 "Just imagine, if you don't do this, someone will take my cat." 506 00:23:57,560 --> 00:24:00,240 Alex asked Ardal why he'd stopped and he said, 507 00:24:00,280 --> 00:24:01,680 and I think I'm quoting here, 508 00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:04,800 "Because everything was happening like it was supposed to." 509 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:06,920 THEY LAUGH 510 00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:10,240 And then within minutes of that, he and the robot were both lying 511 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:11,840 on the floor kicking their legs. 512 00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:13,840 GREG CHUCKLES 513 00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:15,000 Obviously, we all... 514 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:18,280 There was at least one thing that we didn't manage to get. 515 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,720 Well, there was definitely for you, yes. Hmm. 516 00:24:20,760 --> 00:24:23,200 Bridget seemed to find her groove towards the end, though. 517 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,520 It's worth having another look at Bridget cos it... 518 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:28,440 She was so close, we had to look at it frame by frame at the end. 519 00:24:28,480 --> 00:24:31,120 Wow. It's whether or not the monster is squatting 520 00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:33,120 when everything else is happening. 521 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:42,640 Click. It does click. 522 00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:44,160 Click. Yeah. 523 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:45,920 CHRIS: It's a blur, innit? 524 00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:47,440 SOPHIE: But it's up, it's up. 525 00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:49,000 JUDI: Yeah, it clicked. 526 00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,160 BRIDGET: Look, it's clicking. I thought it was the... 527 00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,200 It's that blur when it first clicks. 528 00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,680 It blurs like it's about... GREG: God, that blur is so... 529 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:58,200 But, Bridget, she didn't lie down on the ground at the end. 530 00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:00,760 The blur is weighing so heavy on my mind. 531 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:02,920 OVERLAPPING SPEECH It was so mean. 532 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:04,360 No, but it's up to him. Oh! 533 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:06,840 God, the blur! 534 00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:08,480 I'm going to allow it. 535 00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:10,400 She's done it! She's done it. 536 00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:13,280 ROARING APPLAUSE 537 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,200 Right, let's have a break! 538 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:18,400 You're suffocating me. 539 00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:20,040 I need to try and work out who I am. 540 00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:23,640 There can't be an us until I find me. Surely you understand that! 541 00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:25,320 Yes. See you in a bit. 542 00:25:25,360 --> 00:25:26,880 APPLAUSE 543 00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:33,960 APPLAUSE 544 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,320 Hello! 545 00:25:35,360 --> 00:25:39,120 We're back again and so is he! 546 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:43,160 Coo-ee! Before the break, a plate-spinning task had begun. 547 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:45,680 The object is to get seven things happening at the same time. 548 00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:47,240 Monsters squatting, robot walking, 549 00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,320 marble rolling, cradle clicking, sand falling, 550 00:25:49,360 --> 00:25:51,840 fidget spinner spinning and candles snuffed. 551 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,360 Bridget is the only one who's done it so far. 552 00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,040 Now there are only two people left that can do it. 553 00:25:57,080 --> 00:26:01,080 It's time for Judi and Chris to look silly with some toys. Here we go. 554 00:26:01,120 --> 00:26:03,200 The candles must be out. 555 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,480 So what happens if I blow them out now? 556 00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:06,800 They'll be out. 557 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,240 So that's one bit done. 558 00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,520 How are the marbles supposed to roll? 559 00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:21,720 How's a marble supposed to roll? How's a marble supposed to roll? 560 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:23,000 How long will that go for? 561 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:28,240 OK. OK. OK! 562 00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:30,080 You bastards are going last. 563 00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:33,360 Oh, this is ridiculous. 564 00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:36,840 This is ridiculous. This is ridiculous. 565 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:39,440 This I can do for quite a while cos I've got one in the house. 566 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,560 OK, I think I've got this. Yeah. 567 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:44,280 Right, I think I've got this. 568 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:50,960 Ah! I think I've got this. Yep. 569 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:53,320 OK, OK. 570 00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:55,400 OK, OK, OK. 571 00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:57,120 Hold on, hold on. 572 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,920 I've got this, hold on, 573 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:00,880 Hold on. I think I've got this. Hold on. 574 00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:02,200 Oh, God. 575 00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:04,840 Have you got this? I think so. Hold on. 576 00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:06,760 OK. 577 00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:19,840 I've stopped the clock. 578 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:21,760 APPLAUSE 579 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:30,360 It's looking good. 580 00:27:35,560 --> 00:27:38,360 I think I had that. I think I had that. 581 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,240 I think I've smashed that task, to be honest with you. 582 00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:43,200 LAUGHTER 583 00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:45,600 Thanks, bye. Bye, Judi. 584 00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:51,360 I'm not sure what the face was that you looked up 585 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:55,400 to Alex with at the end, but it was one of great satisfaction, I think. 586 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:56,640 JUDI GIGGLES 587 00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:57,960 Daddy? 588 00:27:58,000 --> 00:27:59,320 I think it was a daddy look. 589 00:27:59,360 --> 00:28:00,480 Did I do good, Daddy? 590 00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:01,720 He had to check in... 591 00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:04,240 JUDI: The little boy... The little boy had to check in twice - 592 00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:06,920 after he'd blown the candles out, 593 00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:09,320 and then after he completed everything. I... Well... 594 00:28:09,360 --> 00:28:11,080 Cos I was expecting Captain Dickhead here 595 00:28:11,120 --> 00:28:12,760 to just keep lighting 'em again. 596 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:14,400 That is my full title. Thank you, Chris. 597 00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:16,560 How come Chris' candles didn't relight? Yeah, yeah. 598 00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:18,720 Did he just blow them out with his super strong lungs? 599 00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,600 No, he got there quick, that's what you've got to do with those candles. 600 00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,640 If you blow them quick enough, they don't get down 601 00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:26,240 to the ignition stage. Oh, really! He seemed pretty efficient. 602 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,000 Yeah, he did succeed, there's no doubt, in 2:57. Wow! 603 00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:30,600 By stark contrast... 604 00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:34,400 Judi, are you working on some new catchphrases? 605 00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:35,760 She was really trying. 606 00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:38,160 I think I've got this... LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH 607 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:40,400 Don't forget, "How's a marble supposed to roll? 608 00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:41,920 "How's a marble supposed to roll?" 609 00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:43,720 You're in that moment of that pressure, 610 00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:45,680 you're in a room, it's all plastic, 611 00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:47,400 you think you're going to get chopped up. 612 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:50,480 Like, it's... I think I kind of went into, like, the mum role. 613 00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:51,960 Like, do you know what I mean? 614 00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,280 Cooking, breast-feeding at the same time. 615 00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:57,520 Say... Say... Saying.... Drinking a glass of wine. 616 00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,480 Saying sentences repeatedly. Yes, that's what you say to the kids! 617 00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,920 Sit down. Sit down. Sit down. Sit down! 618 00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:04,880 LAUGHTER 619 00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:08,680 She applauded after 2:32 and we have had to slow down the footage again - 620 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:12,000 so it's looking at the candle and, again, the squatting monster. 621 00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,080 It's looking good. 622 00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:18,120 Yeah, I got it! 623 00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:19,760 No way! 624 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,400 Ah... No! 625 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,520 No way. 626 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:25,400 They are not out. They're not out. 627 00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:26,680 And that is not a squat. 628 00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:29,360 But I... But, but, but... Ah. 629 00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,760 I was the fastest to lose. 630 00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:33,200 LAUGHTER 631 00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,400 Yeah, you can take that home with you. 632 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:37,000 Good. Let's award some points. 633 00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,800 OK, well, Chris and Bridget definitely get points. 634 00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:42,040 Four points to Bridget, five to Chris Ramsey. 635 00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:43,560 APPLAUSE 636 00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,120 The other three just didn't, didn't do the task so... 637 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,760 So they get zero. Yes, but we preserved our dignity. 638 00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,400 Let's have one more task, then, please! 639 00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:55,640 Here we go, it's time to tick something off my bucket list. 640 00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:02,880 Oh, no. 641 00:30:02,920 --> 00:30:05,240 Ha-ha, ha! What're you doing? 642 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:08,280 Something's different. You cut your hair? 643 00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:09,640 Is it your suit? 644 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:12,840 Oh, yeah. It's my special outfit. 645 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:15,240 I like seeing you in that position, actually. 646 00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:21,640 "Enable Alex to bite his duck." 647 00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:23,720 "You may not encroach upon the decking." 648 00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:25,640 "Fastest wins." 649 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:29,640 "Also the person who gets Alex the least wet gets a bonus point. 650 00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:31,680 "Your time starts now." 651 00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:34,200 So you have to be able to bite the duck? 652 00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:35,560 I just want to bite the duck. 653 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:37,920 Can you tell me how far the duck is in? 654 00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:39,840 Uh, the duck's at the bottom of the bucket. 655 00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,040 This is like a really filthy task. 656 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:43,840 APPLAUSE 657 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,120 You came up with this task, didn't you? 658 00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:50,040 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 659 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,240 So you dressed yourself in pink. I don't... Yep. 660 00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:54,160 You tied yourself up. Yeah. 661 00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:56,960 And you said that the challenge is to help you to bite your duck. 662 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,280 Enable, I went for enable. What's going on with you? 663 00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:02,040 Well... I think you're going through some difficult years. 664 00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:04,120 LAUGHTER 665 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:06,280 It is creepy when someone ties theirself up. I... 666 00:31:06,320 --> 00:31:08,040 Or acts like they're so tied up. Mm. Yeah. 667 00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:10,760 But really they could set yourself free. You did tie yourself up. 668 00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:13,040 There were other people. There was the camera crew... 669 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:16,560 You asked them to tie you up. Yes. It's really weird, mate. 670 00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:19,080 I think we're going to have to have a little chat afterwards. 671 00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:22,080 Yes. Anyway, the challenge is there for these poor people to attempt. 672 00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:23,720 Mm-hm. Who's first? 673 00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:25,320 Well, sometimes they're a team, 674 00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:27,640 sometimes they all just do the same silly things. 675 00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:29,520 It's Judi, it's Sophie and it's Bridget 676 00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:31,440 all at the same time, here we go. 677 00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,840 Um, is your duck in there? 678 00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:35,240 Yeah, I can see it. 679 00:31:35,280 --> 00:31:36,440 Is it floating? 680 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:39,200 Not at the moment. Right, can I use something, then? 681 00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:40,600 It doesn't say I can't. 682 00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:45,520 How big's your duck? 683 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:46,880 Below average. 684 00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:49,480 LAUGHTER 685 00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:52,840 It's fine. It's fine, Alex. We've got this, babe. 686 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:54,800 All right. I'm quite keen to bite my duck. 687 00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:06,920 Can you bite the duck now? 688 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:12,840 No, you can't. Mm. 689 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:22,000 Come forward, Al... 690 00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:23,680 AUDIENCE OOHS 691 00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:36,440 I think he's eating it, isn't he? 692 00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:38,120 APPLAUSE Oh. 693 00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:41,000 This is so good. 694 00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:42,640 Like, it feels good, doesn't it? 695 00:32:45,440 --> 00:32:46,760 Yeah. 696 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:47,920 OK. 697 00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,960 This is amazing. I'm so happy and proud of you. 698 00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:54,480 Alex, you've got to work with me. 699 00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:56,640 What do you want me to... 700 00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:59,040 Bite it here. 701 00:32:59,080 --> 00:33:00,280 Hold on. 702 00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:05,480 Yes! 703 00:33:05,520 --> 00:33:07,520 APPLAUSE 704 00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:10,000 I should've thought of that much quicker. 705 00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:12,320 I'm disappointed in myself. I really am. 706 00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:19,880 Did you see how... Look, he was really fighting against me. 707 00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:23,120 Everybody else, you opened your mouth WIDE enough! 708 00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:26,600 And if you think of it on a scientific level, right... 709 00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:28,240 Ah, good. At last. Right? 710 00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:30,840 ..me and Sophie - look at the height difference. 711 00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:35,040 How did she reach so far in for him to bite straight away? 712 00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:37,520 Be... Because... That shows he wasn't biting for me. 713 00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,040 He should be leaning... Listen, isn't it! 714 00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:43,360 Look at the length. Put your arm out. Put your arm out, girl! 715 00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:47,120 Look at that! So that's a scientific thing, you see. 716 00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:49,760 Very similar techniques from all three. 717 00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:51,480 They were all very logical. 718 00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:55,480 All the women, they weren't lured by this, just a mention of water. 719 00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:57,000 Uh... But let's... Let's... 720 00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:58,720 And the bucket and the wellies! 721 00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:00,640 Come on. Bridget, you've fulfilled, 722 00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:03,400 unknowingly, one of Alex's sexual fantasies 723 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:05,240 by turning him into a beekeeper. 724 00:34:05,280 --> 00:34:07,680 LAUGHTER 725 00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:10,320 He enjoyed... He bit very hard on that duck. 726 00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:12,280 He did. Yep. He did. 727 00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:14,800 Bridget enjoyed it as well. You had a big smile on your face 728 00:34:14,840 --> 00:34:17,080 while feeding the duck in one minute and one second. 729 00:34:17,120 --> 00:34:18,840 ALL:Wow. APPLAUSE 730 00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,520 Sophie was 2:13. Judi, 3:15. Oh, yeah. 731 00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:23,280 So all sub, like, ten or four. 732 00:34:23,320 --> 00:34:24,800 Yep. We've had three good attempts. 733 00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:28,160 Right, that's the end of that part. Bye! 734 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:31,160 APPLAUSE 735 00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:38,960 APPLAUSE 736 00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:40,040 Hello, again. 737 00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:42,920 We have made it to the final part of the show. What's left, Alex? 738 00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:44,840 Well, I still want to bite my duck, Greg. 739 00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,640 So far, Judi, Bridget and Sophie kindly enabled me to do so. 740 00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:51,840 But will the boys also help me out, and can they do it faster? 741 00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:53,840 And let's not forget there's a bonus point for 742 00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:55,720 the person that gets me the least wet. 743 00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:58,320 Here, then, is how Ardal and Chris got on. 744 00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:01,400 Sorry, Alex. 745 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:07,600 Nothing went in the bucket. 746 00:35:15,720 --> 00:35:17,080 This has worked quite well. 747 00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:18,320 Yeah. 748 00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:19,480 Is it biteable yet? 749 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:20,920 Not yet, no, Chris. 750 00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:22,880 I don't want to get you wet, Alex. 751 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:25,600 So... Try something like this. 752 00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:29,800 Mm-hm. 753 00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:35,280 Anywhere? 754 00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:36,440 Not yet. No. 755 00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:37,840 I'm enjoying myself. 756 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:42,040 You can go fuck yourself, you can. 757 00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:43,400 Pardon? 758 00:35:43,440 --> 00:35:45,160 That's never going to fill up, is it? 759 00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:46,960 There's a hole in that bucket. 760 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:49,640 The question is - is it coming out faster than it's going in? 761 00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:51,720 I'd say it is going up. But very slowly. 762 00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:55,600 Are you getting close to that duck yet? 763 00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:57,720 I can't see the duck. There's a pipe in the way. 764 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,560 Oh, my God, it's not even on full power, you shit. 765 00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:02,240 Here it comes. 766 00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:07,040 Why is the shed getting wet? 767 00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:09,240 Is it going out the end of the shed? This is a good hose! 768 00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,080 Oh, God. 769 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:14,200 I think plan A again, Alex. I'm really sorry. 770 00:36:14,240 --> 00:36:15,560 What if I tip the bucket? 771 00:36:19,120 --> 00:36:20,520 Sorry, Alex. 772 00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:21,880 Can you see the duck yet, Chris? 773 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:23,280 Can't see the duck. 774 00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,560 He's having a nice time. Is he? Yeah. 775 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,560 OK, that's just going to take too long so, 776 00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,640 just going to knock the bucket over. Mm-hm. 777 00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,560 Now you've got the duck. 778 00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,640 LAUGHTER 779 00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:40,640 APPLAUSE 780 00:36:42,640 --> 00:36:44,160 Hey! I've stopped the clock. 781 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:45,680 Told you we'd get there, Alex. 782 00:36:45,720 --> 00:36:46,760 Uh-huh. 783 00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:48,880 OK. See you. Thank you. 784 00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,520 Doing some disgusting things to that duck. 785 00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:53,320 SLURPING 786 00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:57,280 Yes. Yes! 787 00:36:59,960 --> 00:37:01,680 Wow. Thank you, Chris. 788 00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:04,200 It's OK, and just cos I think the Taskmaster would respect it, 789 00:37:04,240 --> 00:37:05,960 Ahhh! 790 00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,160 ALEX YELLS 791 00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:12,520 I don't even care about the points, this is fucking great. 792 00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:13,840 This is therapy. 793 00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:15,040 Chris? Yeah? 794 00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:16,800 You can go now. Thanks, mate. 795 00:37:16,840 --> 00:37:17,840 OK. 796 00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:20,640 Stick your duck up your arse. 797 00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:25,640 GREG LAUGHS 798 00:37:27,240 --> 00:37:28,360 Oh, Christopher, I've... 799 00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:29,880 I've stopped giving bonus points, 800 00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:31,760 but I can't tell you what an absolute... 801 00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:33,880 How right you were. 802 00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:35,560 And how long that jet was. 803 00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:37,800 And, you know, you've got to share that glory 804 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:42,280 with Ardal, who immediately threw a pan of water at Alex's face. 805 00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:47,200 Chris was the last person to do the task and he was the only one 806 00:37:47,240 --> 00:37:49,400 who discovered the elaborate hole in the bucket, 807 00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:51,960 which went down through a pipe into my wellies. 808 00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:53,040 There we are. 809 00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:54,520 So do you want to hear some times? 810 00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:55,640 Yes. 811 00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:57,880 LAUGHTER 812 00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:00,760 OK, well, we know that the fastest person was Bridget, 813 00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:03,880 so it's five points to Bridget, four to Sophie, three to Judi. 814 00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,600 Ardal did it in 14:37. 815 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:09,400 Chris in 15:38. 816 00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:10,920 Wow. So just the one point. 817 00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:15,000 But there is a bonus point for whoever kept me the driest. 818 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:18,000 I would say all three ladies didn't wet me. 819 00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:20,200 So all three ladies get a bonus point. 820 00:38:20,240 --> 00:38:21,280 I think so. 821 00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:22,440 Perfectly acceptable. 822 00:38:22,480 --> 00:38:25,520 All right, so, six to Bridget, five to Sophie, four to Judi, 823 00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:28,760 two to Ardal and one to Chris. And we're done! We're done! 824 00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:32,320 Right, please make your way to the stage 825 00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:33,920 for the final task of the show. 826 00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:35,960 APPLAUSE 827 00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:45,360 Who's going to read it out? 828 00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:48,080 Please can you read it out, Judi? Girls. 829 00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:51,480 "As a team, put one of your faces 830 00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:54,680 "and one of your legs through the hole." 831 00:38:54,720 --> 00:38:56,080 I'm not doing that shit. 832 00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:03,040 "The Taskmaster will guess whether the leg belongs to 833 00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:06,360 "the face or the other contestant. 834 00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:10,880 "Most wrong guesses after three rounds wins." 835 00:39:10,920 --> 00:39:12,440 One at a time. 836 00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:16,480 One of the teams... JUDI CHORTLES 837 00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:17,760 ..will, uh... POP! 838 00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:19,400 ..a face. 839 00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:23,160 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 840 00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:27,440 So it's three rounds each. The boys are going to go first. 841 00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:28,600 I want the men in the booth. 842 00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:31,000 Men, please, go into the booth. All right. 843 00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:33,280 They're making their way into the booth now. 844 00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:35,720 OK. So they're now in. 845 00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:39,360 And if you just scream, "I'm ready," when you're ready, please. 846 00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:42,120 Quite tricky cos they're quite of similar size, these two. 847 00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:44,600 Well, I should make it clear they are all wearing 848 00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:47,240 the same size boot and the same size boiler suit. 849 00:39:47,280 --> 00:39:50,360 They are deliberately baggy. They're all size nine boots. 850 00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,400 So you can't be looking at that detail. 851 00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:53,360 Thank you. 852 00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:54,720 ARDAL: Ready for the first one. 853 00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:56,600 OK. I'm going to... Watch out, hold on. 854 00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:58,800 You sure you're ready? CHRIS: Yeah. 855 00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:00,680 OK, well, I'm going to show you the face. 856 00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:02,440 Of course, there's the little face. 857 00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:05,720 Little Ardal's face. 858 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:07,400 And a boot, there it is. 859 00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:08,800 It's going to be really hard. 860 00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:10,520 I think that's Ardal's face. 861 00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:12,200 GREG LAUGHS 862 00:40:13,520 --> 00:40:15,840 But I think it's Chris Ramsey's leg. 863 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,640 I'm now going to ask Chris Ramsey to leave the booth. 864 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:21,120 Ah! 865 00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:23,000 APPLAUSE 866 00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:25,520 Lovely. 867 00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:27,520 OK, please return to your spots. Thank you. 868 00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:29,120 And it's time for the... Great work. 869 00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:30,640 ..ladies to enter the booth. 870 00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:33,440 Where is he? 871 00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:34,560 We don't know. 872 00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:36,080 Oh, sorry! GREG CHORTLES 873 00:40:37,480 --> 00:40:38,800 Sorry. 874 00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:43,360 Waiting in the booth for the ladies. 875 00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:46,760 Goodness me, Ardal! 876 00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,440 GIRLS: Sh! We're ready. 877 00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,840 You hear? Oh, they're ready. They're ready, Greg. Ready. 878 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,560 Are you ready to see the face? Oh, God, am I? 879 00:40:53,600 --> 00:40:55,400 That's Judi Love. Yeah. 880 00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:57,000 Is this Judi Love's leg? 881 00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:00,960 Right, I believe it... 882 00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:03,960 That it's Judi Love's face. Sure. 883 00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:05,360 SCATTERED LAUGHTER 884 00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:08,400 But I do not believe it is Judi Love's leg. 885 00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:09,920 OK, so one at a time. 886 00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:12,000 There's one lady not doing anything - definitely. 887 00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:15,120 Might be two, but if the definite lady could leave the booth, please, 888 00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:16,400 and return to your circle. 889 00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:18,640 There they go. Ha-ha! Right. 890 00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,360 I would now ask anyone who's not Judi Love to leave the booth. 891 00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:23,440 AUDIENCE OOHS 892 00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:25,080 Ooh, ho-ho! 893 00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:27,480 APPLAUSE 894 00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:29,520 I'm having an absolute shocker. 895 00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:30,920 I can't... 896 00:41:30,960 --> 00:41:34,200 LAUGHTER 897 00:41:38,280 --> 00:41:40,800 It's like they're pulling a dead body out of there. 898 00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:43,160 JUDI: Oh! 899 00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:47,360 Oh, so it's one-one. 900 00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:48,640 Well, I mean, it's electric. 901 00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:50,000 We got to do this again? 902 00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:51,360 Twice more. 903 00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:53,840 Pop the boys in the booth. Boys in the booth. 904 00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:55,200 Boys in the booth. 905 00:41:55,240 --> 00:41:57,200 Pull the curtain! 906 00:41:57,240 --> 00:41:58,440 Hmm. 907 00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:00,120 You disappointed with yourself, Greg? 908 00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:02,080 No, it was a sort of pleasurable "hmm." 909 00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:03,440 CHRIS, MUFFLED: Ready. 910 00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:05,520 OK, they're ready, Greg. 911 00:42:05,560 --> 00:42:06,960 Here's Chris' face, presumably. 912 00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:09,760 Yeah. OK, but is this part of Chris Ramsey? 913 00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:12,160 Ooh, what an angle. 914 00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:13,720 I mean, it's very clever. 915 00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:15,480 Does that leg belong to that face? 916 00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:19,280 Against my instinct, I'm going to say that leg 917 00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:21,080 does belong to that face. 918 00:42:21,120 --> 00:42:24,160 I'm going to ask Ardal O'Hanlon to leave the booth, please. 919 00:42:25,720 --> 00:42:26,960 Fuck! 920 00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:28,400 AUDIENCE OOHS 921 00:42:28,440 --> 00:42:30,480 Greg, you got it right. You were right. 922 00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:31,720 I was right! 923 00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:34,680 The door has opened for the women. 924 00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:35,920 Right, so now I know, 925 00:42:35,960 --> 00:42:37,880 I must do the opposite to what I actually think. 926 00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:39,440 LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH 927 00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:42,360 OK, women, please, go back into the booth. Would you mind? 928 00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:43,880 MUFFLED SPEECH 929 00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:45,440 Course not. 930 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,680 Whose face do you think you're going to see, Greg? 931 00:42:47,720 --> 00:42:49,160 FEMALE VOICE: Ready. 932 00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:51,800 Oh, now... Now that the voice has been disguised, I don't know. 933 00:42:53,400 --> 00:42:54,680 It's Bridget. Ooh. 934 00:42:54,720 --> 00:42:57,200 Yes. But is that Bridget? Oh. 935 00:42:57,240 --> 00:42:59,400 I don't believe that's Bridget's leg. 936 00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:01,880 OK, could the spare part please leave? 937 00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:04,040 GRUNTING 938 00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:08,240 I still feel confident. I knew it wasn't Sophie's little leg. 939 00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:11,280 OK, if you're not Bridget Christie, please leave the booth. 940 00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:14,640 AUDIENCE OOHS 941 00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,120 They've done it again! 942 00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:17,600 APPLAUSE I should've known, 943 00:43:17,640 --> 00:43:20,040 with all the ooh, ah, ah. I should've known. 944 00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:21,760 The women can't lose now. 945 00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:24,760 But can the men at least get a draw? The final time. 946 00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,240 So, basically, we've won? 947 00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:27,560 SOPHIE: Yep. 948 00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:30,080 Well, you might draw if they do it and you don't on the last one. 949 00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:31,600 Sorry, Judi. Yes, you've won. 950 00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:33,440 LAUGHTER 951 00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:35,040 ARDAL: We're ready. 952 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:36,400 Oh, quite quick, this one. 953 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:37,600 SHE SQUEAKS 954 00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:39,520 Oh, I just trod on something. 955 00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:41,880 MUFFLED: Oh! 956 00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:44,360 I think that's Ardal's foot. 957 00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:45,920 Well, let's see. 958 00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:47,240 It's Chris' face. 959 00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:48,480 Is that Chris' leg? 960 00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:50,760 Make some noises, make some weird noises, Ardal. 961 00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:53,560 Ooh! 962 00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:58,000 BRIDGET & SOPHIE: # It's a long way to Tipperary... # 963 00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:59,880 LAUGHTER 964 00:43:59,920 --> 00:44:01,120 It's Ardal's leg. 965 00:44:01,160 --> 00:44:04,920 Well, if you're not Chris Ramsey, please leave the booth. 966 00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:06,200 BRIDGET: Oh. 967 00:44:06,240 --> 00:44:08,240 Bugger! 968 00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:09,920 It was Ardal's leg. 969 00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:13,040 See if you can do three for three. 970 00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:14,360 Oh, for fuck's sake, hun. 971 00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:17,560 LAUGHTER 972 00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:19,520 They've beaten you twice, though, Greg. 973 00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:21,520 Yeah, they won't beat me a third time. 974 00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:22,880 FEMALE VOICE: We're ready. 975 00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:24,040 Right. Yeah. 976 00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:27,240 It's Judi again. OK. 977 00:44:29,680 --> 00:44:31,480 And there it is, dangling. 978 00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:34,600 I think that is not Judi Love's leg. 979 00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:38,240 As always, I'll ask one of you to leave the booth. 980 00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:39,680 Is it your leg again? 981 00:44:39,720 --> 00:44:41,480 It's... It's my leg, babes. 982 00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:43,680 Send Sophie out, then. 983 00:44:43,720 --> 00:44:46,240 There it is, three for three. 984 00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:48,000 It was. 985 00:44:48,040 --> 00:44:49,280 Right, come back down here 986 00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:51,640 and we'll see how that's affected the final scores! 987 00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:54,200 APPLAUSE 988 00:44:58,200 --> 00:44:59,560 Welcome back. Thank you, Greg. 989 00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:01,320 Ladies, you did very well. 990 00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:03,360 Mm-hm. We tricked you. The boys deceived me once. 991 00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:04,880 I am dictating. 992 00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:06,280 The points will be scored thus. 993 00:45:06,320 --> 00:45:08,920 Two points per person per deception. 994 00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:10,280 AUDIENCE OOHS 995 00:45:10,320 --> 00:45:12,440 OK, which means the men get two points each. 996 00:45:12,480 --> 00:45:13,760 Correct. Yeah. 997 00:45:13,800 --> 00:45:15,080 The women get six points each. 998 00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:17,640 In terms of the series, Chris is no longer in the lead. 999 00:45:17,680 --> 00:45:19,520 Bridget has stolen that from him. 1000 00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:23,560 What? Because in this episode, she has won by a landslide nine points. 1001 00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,440 She has 25 in total. Wow. 1002 00:45:25,480 --> 00:45:26,720 Bridget Christie. Wow! 1003 00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:30,080 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1004 00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:32,120 I'm shocked! 1005 00:45:32,160 --> 00:45:33,640 Ooh! 1006 00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:36,280 Bridget Christie wins Episode Three! 1007 00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:40,040 Please go and gather and giggle at your unusually named artefacts. 1008 00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:43,080 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1009 00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:46,000 Right, we'll do this again soon, 1010 00:45:46,040 --> 00:45:48,600 but in the meantime, let's celebrate tonight's big winner. 1011 00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:50,880 It's Bridget Christie! 1012 00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:53,240 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1013 00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:17,680 Subtitles by Red Bee Media113097

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