All language subtitles for Kukhnya02.03

"KITCHEN"

Lots of people think

that a man is a master of his fate.

We decide ourselves

when and with who we want to be.

"Delete?"
"Yes."

That absolutely everything in our lives

is only for us to decide.

"Image can not be deleted."

And the exact moment
we start to believe in it,

fate usually surprises us.

Ok, Timur.

And get for me
the meat of a young lamb,

and not of a pensioner lamb
like yesterday.

Viktor Petrovich!

Are you alive, Viktor Petrovich?

Please forgive me,
for God's sake.

I just haven't noticed you.

That's how you
put away your competitors.

Let me, I'll get you up

and we'll go to the hospital.

Let's snooze ten more minutes.

Again?

Let's not go to work at all.

Let's not go.

You've spoiled all the view.

Max, after work
we need to clean up here

and pass by the grocery.

We?

And then to have kids
and play with grandchildren.

Listen, Sasha, we're friends with you

or I don't understand something?

Actually things
that we were doing yesterday,

friends normally don't do.

That's right.

I just don't need
serious relationship now.

After what I had with...

Well, you understand...

Relax, everything is fine.

You don't owe me anything.

Seriously? No offence?

Seriously and no offence.

You are the best.

So, well... Kostya, look away.

Look away.

Relax, I'm going to take a shower.

Sorry.

Kostya?

Well...

We need to oil the hinges.
I'll do it.

Maxim, and what about Vika?

And what about Vika?

I'm done with Viktoria Sergeevna.

She has cheated on me.

She cheated on you?

Haven't you cheated on her?

Kostyan, don't start.

Slight tear of ligaments.

It's not that serious.

Limit the weight on your leg.

I have written you everything.

Thanks.

We have to write down
the cause of your trauma.

Do I look like a parrot?

I'll repeat again.
It was a car accident.

Have you remembered car plate?

- Are you going to report it to the police?
- No...

The thing is...

I forgot to put the handbrake
on my car.

And it drove into me.

I'm not going to report it.

You can just have a good laugh
about it in you department.

Thanks, buddy, for helping me out.

So many orders, as if the cow
is going to extinct soon.

Listen, you are a great friend, but...

don't know how to fry.

It's as hard as a shoe sole.

It's hard?

It's hard.

Sissy, we were eating
boots in the navy,

when navigation stopped working
in the Sea of Japan.

Got it?

You're fibbing!
As if you were eating boots...

Really, we were boiling
and eating them.

And belts as well...

You don't believe me?!

Maybe let's bet on 5 thousand.

Will you eat my belt?

For 5 thousand?

I'll eat it.

Louis...

That's it, go.

Take it.

Is it even leather?

I don't eat if it's not leather.

It's leather, leather.

Very fresh,
I just got it a week ago.

Very tasty.

Eat.

I won't eat it with the buckle.

And it's very long,
because you are fat.

When I was in navy,
we were eating this size.

Ok, let's make the task easier.

Eat at least this.
Come on.

What "come on, come on"?

I am a cook,
I'll cook it and then eat.

Who eats belts raw?

All right.

Whatever.

Cook.

Thanks, that you haven't reported me,
Viktor Petrovich.

It's not too late.

Encouraging.

Do you want...

all the time you wear cast
I'll be driving you to work?

I can get you from work too.

And in general
if there are any problems,

don't hesitate, let me know.

I haven't even thought to hesitate.

Here.

Laundry receipt.

I wanted to pick up
a suit, and here...

you...

came from heaven on my leg.

Let me I'll help you,
be careful.

(Speaking French)

Have you kicked someone
wrong way?

"Carramba, Captain Silver,

string everyone up from the yardarm."
(mimicking parrot Captain Flint, Treasure Island)

I'll string you up from
the yardarm now.

Invalid.

And who is talking
about invalids?

That's it.

I'm on sick leave. I'm not here.

Are you exterminating
cockroaches here?

This stink is
in the dining-hall already.

It's probably Ainura
making her tea.

My tea doesn't smell
like this...

anymore.

I've brought a new one.

What is it?

Kristina has added
a new dish to the menu?

No, it's Fedya cooking
a low-calorie breakfast.

He wants to lose weight.

You can drop dead
because of this smell.

Take it away, retards.

Yes, by the way, Max, don't forget,
we're paying for the apartment tomorrow.

Listen, buddy, I'm broke.

You know, I spent a lot on Vika's ring.

- By the way, maybe you'll...
- No, no, no...

I don't have money.

You are on your own.

Hello.

May I have an espresso, please?

Actually, I'm not a barman.

But for you, I can do
the best espresso in Moscow.

And if you are not a barman,
who are you?

For you, I can be
whoever you want,

barman, guard,
seal's trainer, Hugh Jackman.

But actually
I'm Chef's senior assistant.

I've made it in 5 seconds,

can you imagine

what I can make
within half an hour.

I would gladly see it.

- My name is Veronika,
- I'm Max.

Konstantin!

Again I have to do all work for you.

May I have you for a moment?

What is this show?

Just a small show
for a good-looking spectator.

And what about Sasha?

What Sasha?

We are just friends.

To be precise
we're friends with benefits.

We're both happy with it.

You have an interesting
relations with your friends.

I have to be more careful.

That's it.
It's time to stop this bet.

Do you agree?

I agree. Get me my 5 thousand.

Why is that?

What do you mean, why is that?

You want to get away.

Hell, no!

I'll...

marinate it,
and then I'll eat it tomorrow.

As our captain got used to say,

it's too early to throw up,
since we still haven't sailed away.

Ok, enjoy.

Such a beautiful dish.

Have you seen a girl here?

She was sitting here in green dress.

No.

I'm sorry.

It's an accident.
I didn't mean it. Honestly.

I'll clean it up.

No, dont.

That's it, now you'll go...

to complain to the management
and they'll fire me, right?

Please, just don't cry.

I'm not going anywhere

and I won't tell anything.

- All this.... it's really bad time!
- It was really an accident. I'm so sorry!

Was there a girl in green dress?

Actually, yes.

Strange. I haven't seen her.

May I?

Here, I picked up your suit.

No need to give me money back.

Let's consider it
my compensation.

Thanks, and here is something else.

Take it to the dry-cleaning.

Are you mocking me?

You couldn't give it to me
when I was going to pick up the suit?

Ah, yes, of course. Sorry.

They just got dirty when I fell down.

After I flew over your car.
It's fine, it's fine.

Forgive me..

It's fine.

I'll do everything, but a bit later,

I had a very tough day.

Yes, one more thing,
I'll be free at 7pm...

be ready, I'll drive you home.

And I finish at 6pm,

so be ready at 6pm.

So good with you...

I like it too,

specially when you
don't have clothes on.

Silly!

Should I maybe
call a taxi for you?

What?

You are without a car today,

how will you get home?

Don't worry.

I'll catch a taxi.

Sasha?

Is everything alright?

You again?
We talked in the morning.

I've heard you need money for rent.

Here, take it.

Well, I'll go.

Bye.

See you tomorrow.

Thanks, Sasha.

- So, she left, maybe let's play.
- I'm not in the mood for some reason.

Take from the table
my share for the apartment.

Wow.

Have you sold the ring?

No.

- Sasha has given it to me now.
- Nice.

It's not enough that
you are friends with benefits,

but now you also get money.
Nice deal.

Listen, is it for one time only
or early membership?

Looks so delicious.

Just don't eat all together right away,
leave me a piece.

Firstly I'll cut it into pieces
and then I'll eat it.

Yea, everything is right,
but firstly beat it,

because it'll be as hard
as your yesterday's steak.

Back off.
Did you understand?

Yes, I did.

Elena.

You told me that you could drive me

if I have something important.

Yes, I've got something.

- Good afternoon.
- Good afternoon.

I see you couldn't
save your dress.

Please, forgive me,
I really feel bad about it. Honestly.

It's fine.

You are probably looking for a manager,

want to tell her everything, right?
- No, no...

Everything is fine.

Tell me... well...

How can I call Maxim?

No need to call anyone.

I'm here. Good afternoon.

Yesterday you didn't wait
for my dish.

The thing is...

I stained my dress.

- Spilled the coffee.
- It happens.

So I had to get a new one.

Well, if this time you wait for me

then you'll be able
to try my new dish.

Not from the menu.

Turn here, we'll drive around.

It's fine, the traffic jam
will be over soon.

I'm telling you, take the turn,
we'll drive around.

I know there is a great shortcut.

Here we go.

Apparently the whole traffic jam
knows your great shortcut.

It's for you.

"Shado with forest berries".

It looks excellent.

For you only the best.

Enjoy.

Thanks.

Lavrov.

Well, what was that?

I can't remember
this dish in our menu.

Maybe I should tell Chef,

that you decided to change the menu,

that he spent years to create.

Vika, you have nothing
else to do?

That what I do here.

And not Vika,
but Viktoria Sergeevna,

the manager of this restaurant.

And I won't let you
change the menu,

because of your another girlfriend.

I'm right on time.

Who needs to be fired?

Viktoria Sergeevna, it's my fault.

This girl, behind me,
is a very famous blogger.

And unfortunately
she is allergic to lactose.

And practically all our dishes
are either with cheese or cream.

and... I asked Max to cook something
not from the menu.

She is really very famous,
she has thousands of followers.

- Who?
- Followers.

Right. And if she wants to ruin
the reputation of our restaurant

she'll do it in no time.

Max, well done.
You've saved our restaurant.

How far is it still?

Well, we are here already.
You can stop now. Here, here.

Just don't tell me we were driving
to this stall.

Yes, we were driving to this stall.

Go get for me
a chewing gum, please.

Watermelon flavor.

Are you serious now?

No, but you...!!!

You...!

You have nothing to do,
I don't understand.

I've spent two hours driving here.

And no one knows now
how long will it take to drive back.

No! This is too far
over the line!

Why did you get so nervous?

I thought it would be fun,
to drive around Moscow, to talk.

Yea, lot's of fun!

You couldn't find
any other way to talk!

Well!

Now, after the chewing gum,
we can go to Sparrow hills (Observation point).

No, thanks.
This is you can do without me.

I don't want to talk to you. Never.

I'll never talk to you anymore.
That's it.

Hey, did you eat a belt
in the sea of Japan with rocca as well?

What's the difference to you
how I'm going to eat it?

With or without salad?

According to the terms of the bet,
it's not prohibited.

Listen, eat it the way you like it,

just don't be on my way,
back off, please.

You back off! Why are you here?

Is there not enough
space for you?

You've used all the pepper
for your salad.

So for your dish, Feodor,
you need pepper?

You are such a gourmet, Feodor.

Where is Senia?

They've been waiting for his salad
half a day already.

What kind of person...

Is it so difficult
to leave at the delivery-table?

Louis, have you seen my salad?

No.

Maybe Anastasia has taken it.

Excuse me...

Yes?

What is it?

Turkey salad.

And the turkey was wearing
trousers and belt?

Go on, call me this cripple
that cooked it.

Sasha, thanks.
You helped me out.

You think very fast.

- It's alright.
- By the way...

that girl haven't passed me
any message.

I have no idea.

I haven't even seen
when she left.

Excuse me, would you like
to ask for a bill maybe?

No, thanks,
I'll stay a bit longer.

I want to thank
the cook personally.

I understand.

I don't know
what's wrong with me!

Please, forgive me!
Honestly, it's not on purpose!

What is this? What's wrong
with this restaurant?!

Do you have any plans
for the evening?

I don't have any.

Is there any suggestions?

The suggestion is only one,
but there should be two to do it.

Such a subtle hint.

I actually wanted
to do some shopping.

But your version I like more.

Why are standing here?

Senya, the guest is calling you,

he didn't like your salad.

Is he Kashpirovsky (hypnotist)?

How could he not like the salad

if he hasn't tried it yet?

Actually, he tried it.

Anyway I don't know,
go and sort it out yourself

- Go!
- No need to push.

Go.

I need to go to the storage.

Listen, shithead...

How the f...

a belt turned out in my salad?

You know...

Here is your salad.

Really? And then why
do I have this one?

You know... we wanted to bet...

What did you want to bet on?

If I eat the belt?

It's not me.

And I don't give a damn
who is it. Anyway...

You'll eat this belt.

Otherwise I'll break your head
with this plate.

Here... Eat!

Come on!

There you go.

Tasty?

Hey, enough chewing.
You have to swallow, swallow.

You won't leave
until you finish everything.

May I get some bread?

Bread?

Here, my dear.

- Hello, is it you again?
- Yes, It's me again.

First of all I wanted to apologize

You have lots of problems
because of me.

It's not nice.

And secondly,
if it's still on the table,

would you drive me
on important business?

To Mytishchi (city in Moscow region)
to get some cookies?

How did you guess?

No, this time, it's really
on important business.

I'll send you now an address,

where you'll pick me up.

All right.

Viktor Petrovich,
where are you going so late?

- To the restaurant.
- To work?

No, actually now as a victim,
I mean as a visitor.

Ah, and most probably
not on your own.

You are shining...

like an anniversary coin.

I haven't thought that
I live with Sherlock Holmes.

Any woman
without a deduction method

would guess
that you have a date.

Don Juan on crutches.

Extraordinary!

- You lost the bet, 5000 rubles.
- What?

What, what?

We had bet on whether a human
can eat a belt.

You proved that it can.
Get me 5000.

I'll kill you.

Chef, dear, have a seat.

Timur, what are you doing here?

Elena Pavlovna said to drive you
on a business matter.

I hope your business matter
has a nice-looking friend.

"Justice renders to everyone his due."

Cicero.

I think it's a total bullshit.

Cicero has not been living
in the 21st century.

People cheat,

and instead of fair punishment,
they get what they want.

Some carry out unfair punishment
for others.

Just like this...

because he happened to be
in a wrong place.

Or ...

Someone created
a problem for the other one

and he payed for it.

Here everything came together.

All in all life is complicated.

And often is unfair to us.

But maybe that is a real justice.

SUBTITLES : OLGA Y