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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,603 --> 00:00:02,466 Kids, in the spring of 2008, 2 00:00:02,566 --> 00:00:05,197 something kinda strange had been happening to your Uncle Barney. 3 00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:07,104 He'd be doing great with a woman... 4 00:00:07,204 --> 00:00:09,621 So I throw the pressurized oxygen tank in his mouth, 5 00:00:09,721 --> 00:00:12,183 I shoot the tank, boom! No more shark. 6 00:00:12,283 --> 00:00:14,570 Mr. Holland and I swim back to shore. 7 00:00:15,053 --> 00:00:16,336 Let me freshen your drink. 8 00:00:16,982 --> 00:00:20,358 He'd only be gone a few moments, but when he returned... 9 00:00:20,458 --> 00:00:21,830 So where were we? 10 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:23,174 ...he'd get slapped. 11 00:00:23,769 --> 00:00:25,066 It kept happening. 12 00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:31,104 Until finally, Lily was approached by a mysterious woman 13 00:00:31,200 --> 00:00:33,522 who warned her to stay away from Barney. 14 00:00:34,194 --> 00:00:36,078 So when it happened once more... 15 00:00:36,481 --> 00:00:39,649 Again?! Really?! Wait... 16 00:00:39,853 --> 00:00:41,820 ...Barney knew who to look for. 17 00:01:01,895 --> 00:01:02,950 Hey, excuse me. 18 00:01:03,056 --> 00:01:04,990 Did I sleep with you and then totally screw you over? 19 00:01:05,305 --> 00:01:06,473 No. 20 00:01:08,608 --> 00:01:10,313 What are you doing on Friday? 21 00:01:19,341 --> 00:01:20,075 Amy? 22 00:01:20,538 --> 00:01:21,344 Abby. 23 00:01:23,168 --> 00:01:25,036 Right. 24 00:01:26,532 --> 00:01:30,207 How I Met Your Mother 3x19 - Everything Must Go - 25 00:01:40,464 --> 00:01:44,377 Kids, sometimes you can do something right a thousand times in a row... 26 00:01:44,482 --> 00:01:47,628 A rainbow! That's beautiful! 27 00:01:48,814 --> 00:01:51,581 What a beautiful rainbow! 28 00:01:52,423 --> 00:01:56,710 Another rainbow? It's beautiful! 29 00:01:56,936 --> 00:01:59,329 But then, that thousand-and-first time... 30 00:01:59,914 --> 00:02:03,373 You're kidding me. Seriously, aren't you sick of these things? 31 00:02:07,366 --> 00:02:08,901 Hey, how was yo day? 32 00:02:09,006 --> 00:02:11,684 Today, I yelled at a little girl for painting a rainbow. 33 00:02:11,908 --> 00:02:15,343 A rainbow? Sounds like that bitch had it coming. 34 00:02:18,348 --> 00:02:21,826 So, uh, I just met with the contractor. 35 00:02:21,928 --> 00:02:24,296 And it turns out, that fixing the floors of the new apartment 36 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:26,237 is going to cost a lot more than the estimate. 37 00:02:26,340 --> 00:02:29,247 But we can barely afford that to begin with. 38 00:02:29,451 --> 00:02:31,085 I hate to say this, 39 00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:33,498 but I think you're going to have to sell your stuff. 40 00:02:33,702 --> 00:02:36,956 Whoa! Marshall, that's just a game we play in the bedroom. 41 00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:40,876 I mean your clothes. All those designer pieces and everything. 42 00:02:41,081 --> 00:02:43,379 What? Why just my clothes? 43 00:02:43,483 --> 00:02:45,628 We can sell my stuff, too, but I got to tell you, 44 00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:48,857 I think your Marc Jacobs cocktail dress is going to go for a lot more than my 45 00:02:48,963 --> 00:02:51,009 - "Split Happens" bowling shirt. - Dude. 46 00:02:51,116 --> 00:02:52,658 I'm not selling that. 47 00:02:54,576 --> 00:02:57,592 - I've already made the Website. - You made a Website? 48 00:02:57,696 --> 00:03:03,072 Yeah, it's called "Lily-and-Marshall -sell-their-stuff-dot-com." 49 00:03:04,158 --> 00:03:07,112 No, you know what would be a better name for the site? 50 00:03:07,218 --> 00:03:14,544 Guy-forces-his-wife-to-dress-in-a-garbage -bag-for-the-next-three-years-dot-com. 51 00:03:16,068 --> 00:03:17,424 That's real. 52 00:03:17,959 --> 00:03:21,804 Now I'm worried. That woman is actually wearing a garbage bag. 53 00:03:22,328 --> 00:03:25,804 Hmm, but, girlfriend, you cannot pull off a tall kitchen. 54 00:03:26,859 --> 00:03:29,167 Why are you trying to ruin my life? 55 00:03:29,269 --> 00:03:31,475 Well, you slept with me and then you never called me again. 56 00:03:32,571 --> 00:03:34,068 - And? - That's it. 57 00:03:34,270 --> 00:03:35,288 That's it? 58 00:03:35,863 --> 00:03:37,727 As far as I'm concerned, if I leave you safe on dry land 59 00:03:37,833 --> 00:03:40,408 with adequate transportation home, you've got nothing to complain about. 60 00:03:40,713 --> 00:03:42,148 Well, it hurt, okay? 61 00:03:42,254 --> 00:03:45,477 And then Ted, the love of my life, started dating my boss instead of me. 62 00:03:45,802 --> 00:03:47,169 Do you know how that feels? 63 00:03:47,274 --> 00:03:50,289 Oh, boo-hoo, poor little Ashley. 64 00:03:50,493 --> 00:03:52,418 - Abby! - Abby. 65 00:03:52,826 --> 00:03:55,749 A few weeks ago, Ted dumped me as his wingman. 66 00:03:56,233 --> 00:03:58,001 You had a crush on him for a couple weeks? 67 00:03:58,104 --> 00:04:00,311 I was Ted's best friend for seven years. 68 00:04:00,416 --> 00:04:03,259 - Ted said Marshall was his best friend. - Seven years! 69 00:04:04,197 --> 00:04:04,932 Sorry. 70 00:04:05,598 --> 00:04:07,273 Ted. What an idiot. 71 00:04:07,968 --> 00:04:12,063 With his stupid "meaningful relationship" with Stella. 72 00:04:12,478 --> 00:04:14,313 - Ted. - Ted. 73 00:04:14,589 --> 00:04:16,952 - I hate Ted. - I hate Ted more. 74 00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:20,434 - Are you as turned on as I am? - Probably not quite as much. 75 00:04:22,888 --> 00:04:24,943 I'm sorry I yelled out "Ted." 76 00:04:25,050 --> 00:04:27,133 I'm sorry I yelled out "Abby." 77 00:04:27,909 --> 00:04:29,595 I am Abby. 78 00:04:30,482 --> 00:04:31,466 Oh, cool. 79 00:04:32,790 --> 00:04:33,926 This is insane. 80 00:04:34,131 --> 00:04:35,886 Has Lily even worn half this stuff? 81 00:04:36,091 --> 00:04:38,807 Oh, yeah, like there's nothing in your closet you've never worn? 82 00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,995 As a matter of fact, no, there isn't. 83 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:43,229 Whatever, red cowboy boots. 84 00:04:43,431 --> 00:04:46,109 Those are nice boots. I totally pull those off. 85 00:04:48,265 --> 00:04:50,637 If I were to say "Ted could never pull them off," 86 00:04:50,745 --> 00:04:52,790 - what would I be talking about? - His red cowboy boots. 87 00:04:52,893 --> 00:04:56,408 I totally pull them off! It's a classic Western look. 88 00:04:56,913 --> 00:04:59,131 Oh, okay, uh, today's category: 89 00:04:59,513 --> 00:05:02,752 classic Westerns that involve red cowboy boots. 90 00:05:03,706 --> 00:05:04,489 Robin. 91 00:05:04,694 --> 00:05:06,672 "The Good, the Bad, and the Fabulous." 92 00:05:08,797 --> 00:05:10,300 "The Magnificent Kevin." 93 00:05:11,586 --> 00:05:13,753 "No Country for Straight Men." 94 00:05:15,726 --> 00:05:17,894 I don't want to sell my clothes! 95 00:05:18,099 --> 00:05:19,925 I know, sweetie. Come here. 96 00:05:22,037 --> 00:05:23,315 Is this a hundred percent silk? 97 00:05:24,769 --> 00:05:26,793 Lily, listen, we really need the money. 98 00:05:26,899 --> 00:05:29,664 I have some leads on a job, but until then, I just... 99 00:05:30,078 --> 00:05:31,285 I don't know what else we can do. 100 00:05:33,022 --> 00:05:34,707 I'll sell my paintings! 101 00:05:35,529 --> 00:05:36,115 What? 102 00:05:36,321 --> 00:05:38,126 Yeah, I'll sell my paintings. 103 00:05:38,162 --> 00:05:40,758 Good oil paintings go for like, $500. 104 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:43,257 Yeah. Totally. 105 00:05:43,713 --> 00:05:44,406 But... 106 00:05:44,511 --> 00:05:47,889 Kids, sometimes you can do something right a thousand times in a row... 107 00:05:48,344 --> 00:05:49,259 I love it. 108 00:05:49,464 --> 00:05:51,087 It's a masterpiece. 109 00:05:53,255 --> 00:05:54,930 That's it. We're selling the TV. 110 00:05:55,134 --> 00:05:57,400 I just want to come home and stare at this all day. 111 00:05:59,176 --> 00:06:00,649 Somebody call the cops! 112 00:06:00,856 --> 00:06:03,769 My wife stole an awesome painting from the museum! 113 00:06:06,544 --> 00:06:08,863 But then, that thousand-and-first time... 114 00:06:08,965 --> 00:06:11,421 ...that kind of money only goes for real paintings. 115 00:06:13,758 --> 00:06:15,041 What does that mean? 116 00:06:16,116 --> 00:06:20,483 Look, it just means that we need money right now and I'm not sure that 117 00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:22,842 selling your paintings is how we're going to get it. 118 00:06:23,380 --> 00:06:24,995 You don't believe in me. 119 00:06:26,367 --> 00:06:28,516 No, wait, wait! Of c... 120 00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:30,093 of course I believe in you! 121 00:06:30,300 --> 00:06:32,866 Marshall, I am proud of my work as an artist. 122 00:06:32,971 --> 00:06:36,186 My paintings are good. I bet Robin would buy one. 123 00:06:36,391 --> 00:06:37,395 What now? 124 00:06:38,841 --> 00:06:42,238 I love your painting, I just... I'm trying to be realistic. 125 00:06:43,301 --> 00:06:46,329 Well, how much money do we need for the contractor to finish the job? 126 00:06:46,532 --> 00:06:47,879 About 1,500 bucks. 127 00:06:48,982 --> 00:06:53,390 So, if I can sell three of my paintings at 500 bucks a pop, then 128 00:06:53,492 --> 00:06:55,308 I get to keep all my clothes. 129 00:06:56,163 --> 00:06:59,190 - We need money fast. - Well, give me a week. 130 00:07:00,915 --> 00:07:02,389 Okay, a week. 131 00:07:02,664 --> 00:07:03,759 - Fine. - Fine. 132 00:07:04,086 --> 00:07:05,221 Fine. 133 00:07:17,269 --> 00:07:20,581 Pulling. Them. Off. 134 00:07:25,577 --> 00:07:28,482 Lily's first move in the great art challenge of 2008 135 00:07:28,590 --> 00:07:31,816 was to display one of her favorite paintings at her friend's gallery. 136 00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:33,554 The night didn't go so well. 137 00:07:39,609 --> 00:07:41,587 But then at the last minute... 138 00:07:41,692 --> 00:07:43,728 - I love it. - You do? 139 00:07:44,011 --> 00:07:46,877 Your top. It's gorgeous. Is that 100% silk? 140 00:07:46,981 --> 00:07:49,976 It's not for sale! My clothes are not for sale! 141 00:07:50,191 --> 00:07:52,828 So the next day, Lily took her painting to a coffee house 142 00:07:52,926 --> 00:07:54,616 that displayed local artists. 143 00:07:54,862 --> 00:07:58,704 We've been sitting here for hours and nobody's even glanced at my painting. 144 00:07:59,206 --> 00:08:01,040 Come on. Let's start talking it up. 145 00:08:03,053 --> 00:08:05,210 I really like that painting! 146 00:08:05,413 --> 00:08:06,989 It's neat! 147 00:08:07,097 --> 00:08:09,189 The-the colors are neat. 148 00:08:09,297 --> 00:08:10,970 The-the shapes are neat. 149 00:08:11,277 --> 00:08:14,113 It's really just... neat. 150 00:08:16,286 --> 00:08:16,983 What? 151 00:08:18,325 --> 00:08:19,352 Observe. 152 00:08:20,488 --> 00:08:23,672 I think there's a dynamic quality to the brushwork that, 153 00:08:23,776 --> 00:08:25,534 combined with the fluid composition, 154 00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:28,572 creates an almost Kandinsky-like emotional resonance. 155 00:08:29,928 --> 00:08:34,573 Yes, and you can still enjoy it even if you're not a pretentious douche. 156 00:08:36,368 --> 00:08:38,285 Can you clarify something for me about your critique? 157 00:08:38,390 --> 00:08:41,665 Are the colors "neat" or are they more "neato burrito?" 158 00:08:43,703 --> 00:08:45,675 Uh, then again, red cowboy boots. 159 00:08:45,780 --> 00:08:50,346 I pull these off! I pull these off! 160 00:08:50,954 --> 00:08:52,907 You know what I hate most about Ted? 161 00:08:53,011 --> 00:08:53,848 What? 162 00:08:54,183 --> 00:08:56,037 His stupid hair. 163 00:08:56,283 --> 00:08:58,899 His stupid, lame awesome hair. 164 00:08:59,224 --> 00:09:01,568 It's so stupid and awesome. 165 00:09:03,843 --> 00:09:05,111 You know what I hate most about Ted? 166 00:09:05,144 --> 00:09:05,870 What? 167 00:09:05,953 --> 00:09:09,939 How he's always like, "Oh, I want to fall in love and have a relationship. 168 00:09:10,044 --> 00:09:13,502 I care about the people I have sex with." He's so lame. 169 00:09:13,707 --> 00:09:15,332 He's so lame and awesome. 170 00:09:18,147 --> 00:09:19,412 You know what he needs? 171 00:09:19,515 --> 00:09:22,842 He needs to see just how horrible he is when he's in a relationship. 172 00:09:23,146 --> 00:09:26,633 Yeah, and I need to show Ted that I'm over him. 173 00:09:27,350 --> 00:09:28,802 Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 174 00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:30,933 I think so. 175 00:09:31,180 --> 00:09:33,315 You're thinking of having sex with Ted? 176 00:09:35,861 --> 00:09:39,926 After four days without selling a single painting, Lily was getting desperate. 177 00:09:40,032 --> 00:09:43,134 Painting for sale! $500! 178 00:09:43,241 --> 00:09:46,118 Lifelong dream hanging in the balance! 179 00:09:47,990 --> 00:09:50,137 It's like they don't even see us. 180 00:09:50,243 --> 00:09:52,089 Yeah, we're dirt to them. 181 00:09:52,571 --> 00:09:54,259 What do you need money for? 182 00:09:54,363 --> 00:09:57,398 Oh, I'm trying to fix the hardwood floors in my new apartment. 183 00:09:57,502 --> 00:09:58,380 You? 184 00:09:58,813 --> 00:09:59,929 Heroin. 185 00:10:03,535 --> 00:10:05,890 - Do you like heroin? - Love it. 186 00:10:05,993 --> 00:10:09,061 If you sell that, I'm going to take your money and go buy some more heroin. 187 00:10:11,086 --> 00:10:13,672 Thanks for your honesty, Crazy Sock Guy. 188 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:18,452 - Oh, I'm never gonna sell this... - It's not very good. 189 00:10:20,296 --> 00:10:22,872 And just as she was about to lose all hope, 190 00:10:22,979 --> 00:10:24,764 something amazing happened. 191 00:10:25,876 --> 00:10:27,122 Oh, my God! 192 00:10:28,339 --> 00:10:31,443 500 bucks! Who's a real painter now, Marshall? 193 00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:33,635 Honey, I never said you weren't a real painter. 194 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:35,365 I know, sweetie. 195 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,483 And since I'm a professional artist now, 196 00:10:38,588 --> 00:10:41,125 I'm going to sketch you an Aldrin original, 197 00:10:41,231 --> 00:10:44,624 you know, to say thanks for being such a supportive husband. 198 00:10:44,729 --> 00:10:46,614 I'm thinking about calling it... 199 00:10:46,721 --> 00:10:47,935 "Suck It!" 200 00:10:48,462 --> 00:10:51,856 Lily, come on. I'm proud of you. Who-who bought it? 201 00:10:52,251 --> 00:10:55,318 Well, that's the best part. A gay couple without kids. 202 00:10:55,424 --> 00:10:57,117 A G-CWOK! 203 00:10:57,382 --> 00:11:00,158 - You bagged a G-CWOK?! - Yeah, that's right. 204 00:11:00,263 --> 00:11:03,008 They are the heart and soul of the art-buying community. 205 00:11:03,112 --> 00:11:05,517 You know what you should do? You should call up the G-CWOKs 206 00:11:05,623 --> 00:11:07,918 and offer them a free painting if they throw a private art party 207 00:11:08,023 --> 00:11:09,638 for all their G-CWOK friends. 208 00:11:09,745 --> 00:11:12,710 That's an amazing idea. I'm going to go call them. 209 00:11:12,814 --> 00:11:16,020 I can probably sell two more paintings with time to spare. 210 00:11:16,514 --> 00:11:20,161 Oh, wait, Marshall. There was something I had to tell you. What was it? 211 00:11:20,265 --> 00:11:21,662 Oh, that's right. 212 00:11:21,796 --> 00:11:22,811 Suck it. 213 00:11:30,328 --> 00:11:31,373 Hey. 214 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:34,372 Ted, fancy bumping into you here. 215 00:11:34,637 --> 00:11:36,785 Have you guys met my girlfriend Abby? 216 00:11:37,358 --> 00:11:40,466 - Uh, yeah. Hi, Abby. So... - Hello, Abby. 217 00:11:40,961 --> 00:11:42,433 So you guys are dating now? 218 00:11:42,628 --> 00:11:43,505 That's right. 219 00:11:43,961 --> 00:11:46,245 I am done with this whole being awesome thing. 220 00:11:46,490 --> 00:11:48,726 Now I'm all about farmers' markets and 221 00:11:48,830 --> 00:11:52,055 day hikes in matching khaki cargo shorts. Isn't that right, sweetie? 222 00:11:52,262 --> 00:11:55,087 That's right. And girlfriends are lame. 223 00:11:55,191 --> 00:11:57,567 Unless they're me. I miss you, Ted. 224 00:11:58,814 --> 00:12:00,816 Abby and I are in love. 225 00:12:01,161 --> 00:12:03,137 Not hot passionate love. 226 00:12:03,245 --> 00:12:04,550 Couple love. 227 00:12:04,653 --> 00:12:07,029 You know, movie night with my girlfriend, 228 00:12:07,135 --> 00:12:08,800 then waiting for her to go to bed 229 00:12:08,906 --> 00:12:11,749 so I can steal one pitiful moment of hollow ecstasy 230 00:12:11,853 --> 00:12:14,249 by the cold, blue light of my computer monitor. 231 00:12:15,497 --> 00:12:17,720 We're showing Ted how lame he is. 232 00:12:17,954 --> 00:12:19,932 You don't have to say it, though. 233 00:12:20,458 --> 00:12:23,090 Uh, okay, Barney, you can stop. 234 00:12:23,296 --> 00:12:25,442 Stop what, Ted? Stop being in love? 235 00:12:25,548 --> 00:12:27,724 Next he'll ask us to stop breathing. 236 00:12:28,666 --> 00:12:30,492 We can't stop breathing, Ted. 237 00:12:30,599 --> 00:12:32,275 Your hair looks amazing. 238 00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:36,853 Barney, I, I see what you're doing. Please stop. 239 00:12:37,058 --> 00:12:41,073 Not before I share with you what being in a relationship leads to, Ted. 240 00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:44,204 Abby, Pookie Bear... 241 00:12:44,839 --> 00:12:48,825 I am so pathetically desperate for you, that... 242 00:12:49,212 --> 00:12:51,217 aw, heck, I'll just say it. 243 00:12:54,341 --> 00:12:57,466 - Will you marry me? - Wait, really? 244 00:12:58,001 --> 00:13:00,678 I would never joke about true love. 245 00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:04,288 - Yes, I'll marry you. - Okay. 246 00:13:05,985 --> 00:13:08,017 Thank you, thank you. 247 00:13:08,442 --> 00:13:10,440 I have to call my mom. 248 00:13:11,693 --> 00:13:12,901 That's you. 249 00:13:14,396 --> 00:13:16,579 Uh, yeah, I don't think Abby knows you're kidding. 250 00:13:16,684 --> 00:13:18,242 Uh, yes, she does. 251 00:13:18,517 --> 00:13:20,430 It finally happened, Mama. 252 00:13:20,615 --> 00:13:23,240 I just wish Daddy were alive to walk me down the aisle. 253 00:13:24,957 --> 00:13:26,621 Totally committed to the bit. 254 00:13:27,846 --> 00:13:30,884 Yes, Lily Aldrin. I sold you the painting earlier today. 255 00:13:31,087 --> 00:13:32,564 Oh, honey, hello. 256 00:13:32,666 --> 00:13:33,884 You sound happy. 257 00:13:34,090 --> 00:13:36,225 Are you kidding? We're popping the champagne right now. 258 00:13:37,088 --> 00:13:40,396 Well, I just wanted to offer you an exclusive chance 259 00:13:40,498 --> 00:13:42,473 to view some of my other paintings. 260 00:13:42,681 --> 00:13:46,736 Oh, honey, oh, sweetie, oh, I guess I should have told you. 261 00:13:46,929 --> 00:13:48,644 We just bought that for the frame. 262 00:13:49,542 --> 00:13:50,244 What? 263 00:13:50,351 --> 00:13:52,136 Yeah, it's an original Anton Kreutzer, 264 00:13:52,241 --> 00:13:54,156 a very rare frame from the turn of the century. 265 00:13:54,773 --> 00:13:57,788 So... you didn't like my painting? 266 00:13:57,992 --> 00:14:00,997 Oh, honey, oh, sweetie, no, not at all. 267 00:14:01,673 --> 00:14:03,966 But you know, good for you. 268 00:14:07,613 --> 00:14:10,819 Well, if you didn't want the painting, can I... 269 00:14:11,175 --> 00:14:13,149 can I at least get it back? 270 00:14:13,433 --> 00:14:15,810 Yeah, no, we don't have it anymore. 271 00:14:16,434 --> 00:14:17,349 Where is it? 272 00:14:19,685 --> 00:14:20,630 I see. 273 00:14:22,347 --> 00:14:23,903 H-He threw out my painting. 274 00:14:25,567 --> 00:14:27,820 Champagne for everyone, on me, 275 00:14:28,086 --> 00:14:30,453 the happiest guy in the world. 276 00:14:33,097 --> 00:14:34,732 Ginger ale. It's a bit. 277 00:14:37,818 --> 00:14:39,162 This is great. 278 00:14:39,270 --> 00:14:41,302 My dream of becoming an artist is dead, 279 00:14:41,409 --> 00:14:45,304 and now I'm watching my wardrobe disappear piece by piece. 280 00:14:46,118 --> 00:14:47,825 There goes my favorite dress. 281 00:14:49,050 --> 00:14:50,466 This dress meant a lot to me. 282 00:14:50,829 --> 00:14:52,666 - Really? - Yeah. 283 00:14:52,889 --> 00:14:57,188 It was spring of 2004 and I had been having a hard few months. 284 00:14:59,450 --> 00:15:01,256 Day-am. 285 00:15:02,451 --> 00:15:04,999 I got a two-syllable "damn" in this dress. 286 00:15:05,372 --> 00:15:07,330 A two-syllable "damn." 287 00:15:07,895 --> 00:15:09,619 - That's the dream. - Yeah. 288 00:15:10,025 --> 00:15:15,998 Now she belongs to... CanadaGirl@MetroNewsOne.com. 289 00:15:16,323 --> 00:15:17,750 It's still in the family. 290 00:15:19,426 --> 00:15:21,509 Lily, you're not going to believe this. 291 00:15:21,835 --> 00:15:23,430 - Something amazing happened. - What? 292 00:15:23,984 --> 00:15:25,690 I went to the G-CWOK's apartment. 293 00:15:25,856 --> 00:15:27,020 Really? Why? 294 00:15:27,128 --> 00:15:28,682 Because I felt guilty. 295 00:15:28,977 --> 00:15:31,782 This auction was my idea and now you've had to sit around all day 296 00:15:31,886 --> 00:15:36,151 while a bunch of vultures ruthlessly pick apart the carcass of your wardrobe. 297 00:15:38,497 --> 00:15:40,263 It's still in the family. 298 00:15:40,659 --> 00:15:42,004 And more importantly, 299 00:15:42,110 --> 00:15:44,054 I honestly love that painting and 300 00:15:44,159 --> 00:15:46,785 I couldn't stand to think of it in a trashcan someplace. 301 00:15:47,230 --> 00:15:48,505 Well, what happened? 302 00:15:50,030 --> 00:15:51,265 Well, hello. 303 00:15:51,371 --> 00:15:55,614 Hi, um... Lawrence. I'm here about the painting my wife Lily sold you... 304 00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:57,576 the one in the nice frame. 305 00:15:57,922 --> 00:16:01,668 Talk about a nice frame. My, my, you are a big one, aren't you? 306 00:16:01,770 --> 00:16:04,517 And you're married to that little bit of a thing. How does that work? 307 00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:06,507 I'd like to find out. 308 00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:09,199 Yeah, we get it. Gay guys like you. 309 00:16:09,764 --> 00:16:11,197 No, Lily, 310 00:16:11,553 --> 00:16:13,918 they love me, but that's not the important part. 311 00:16:14,134 --> 00:16:15,688 Here's the important part. 312 00:16:16,075 --> 00:16:18,899 Since you're clearly a man of impeccable taste and style, 313 00:16:19,006 --> 00:16:20,841 I came down here to ask you: 314 00:16:22,185 --> 00:16:24,031 what do you think of the boots? 315 00:16:29,585 --> 00:16:30,342 Boots. 316 00:16:35,678 --> 00:16:38,681 Pulling. Them. Off. 317 00:16:42,638 --> 00:16:43,924 I'll be in the cab. 318 00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:49,904 G-CWOK-approved. 319 00:16:50,109 --> 00:16:51,233 The painting. 320 00:16:51,670 --> 00:16:54,747 Right, so, um, they told me they threw it in the building's Dumpster. 321 00:16:55,411 --> 00:16:59,016 It wasn't in there, but the super told me that he'd seen one Dr. Greer, 322 00:16:59,121 --> 00:17:00,547 a veterinarian who works in the building, 323 00:17:00,652 --> 00:17:02,206 take the painting out of the trash. 324 00:17:02,531 --> 00:17:06,559 Dr. Greer? Who's Dr. Greer and why did he take my painting? 325 00:17:07,204 --> 00:17:08,698 You're about to find out. 326 00:17:10,753 --> 00:17:12,627 Long story short, I had to make a trash run. 327 00:17:12,734 --> 00:17:14,430 Been a busy day... lots of neuterings. 328 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:15,718 Ooh, we don't need the details. 329 00:17:15,823 --> 00:17:17,529 Oh, no no no, it's not what you think. 330 00:17:17,966 --> 00:17:20,339 Yeah, yeah, yeah, mostly just dog testicles. Anyway... 331 00:17:21,564 --> 00:17:23,159 I noticed your painting 332 00:17:23,266 --> 00:17:27,569 just sitting right there on top and I thought, "Hey, free painting," 333 00:17:28,426 --> 00:17:32,000 so I brought it upstairs and hung it up in Exam Room 3, 334 00:17:32,105 --> 00:17:34,510 and then the strangest thing happened. 335 00:17:36,899 --> 00:17:38,582 Hey, Muffin. 336 00:17:40,049 --> 00:17:42,882 Whoa, I think he remembers me from the last time he was here. 337 00:17:44,759 --> 00:17:47,584 Take Muffin to Exam Room 3. I'll meet you there. 338 00:17:48,971 --> 00:17:51,094 I went in, expecting the worst. 339 00:17:53,669 --> 00:17:56,705 I'd never seen Muffin that calm, 340 00:17:57,070 --> 00:18:01,055 and then a little later the same thing happened again with Tidbit... 341 00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:03,325 and King Larry... 342 00:18:04,591 --> 00:18:07,569 and again with the Weinstein triplets. 343 00:18:10,294 --> 00:18:11,829 Something about your art 344 00:18:11,934 --> 00:18:15,160 speaks to the canine sensibility on a very primal level. 345 00:18:15,393 --> 00:18:18,459 - Really? Dogs like my paintings? - Yeah. 346 00:18:18,666 --> 00:18:21,261 But you know who it bums out? Birds. 347 00:18:22,566 --> 00:18:25,011 Had a parrot in there today. He took one look at it, 348 00:18:25,117 --> 00:18:28,222 pried open his cage, flew right into the ceiling fan. 349 00:18:32,346 --> 00:18:34,481 Anyway, because your first painting worked so well, 350 00:18:34,585 --> 00:18:36,650 I convinced Dr. Greer to buy four more. 351 00:18:36,856 --> 00:18:39,424 - Really? - At $500 a piece. 352 00:18:39,529 --> 00:18:42,481 That's two grand. That's more than we need for the contractor. 353 00:18:42,696 --> 00:18:45,072 Yeah, but I was actually thinking we could reinvest it. 354 00:18:45,178 --> 00:18:46,835 - In what? - In you. 355 00:18:51,189 --> 00:18:53,725 Marshall explained that he was building a fancy new Web site 356 00:18:53,831 --> 00:18:57,507 specifically to sell Lily's artwork to veterinarians. 357 00:18:59,272 --> 00:19:02,516 Well, it's not exactly the clientele I had in mind, but... 358 00:19:03,410 --> 00:19:05,648 thank you for believing in me. 359 00:19:11,173 --> 00:19:14,380 Man, birds do not get you. 360 00:19:25,536 --> 00:19:26,540 Hi, sweetie. 361 00:19:26,645 --> 00:19:28,401 Hey, I think I left my tie here. Have you seen it? 362 00:19:28,654 --> 00:19:31,192 No, I'm in wedding-planning mode. 363 00:19:31,447 --> 00:19:33,972 Stressville. Population: me. Okay, big decision. 364 00:19:34,175 --> 00:19:37,472 What do you think the cake should be: Fudgie the Whale or Cookie Puss? 365 00:19:38,265 --> 00:19:41,314 Yeah, that was a bit. We were doing a bit. 366 00:19:41,768 --> 00:19:44,662 So I'm thinking Labor Day. I was going to say Fourth of July, 367 00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:48,232 but I don't want to steal any attention away from America. 368 00:19:50,140 --> 00:19:52,574 Abby, I've... I've got some bad news. 369 00:19:53,748 --> 00:19:55,614 - I can't marry you. - What? 370 00:19:55,968 --> 00:20:00,104 Ted begged me not to. I think he's in love with you. 371 00:20:00,211 --> 00:20:02,866 - Really? - Yes, our plan worked, 372 00:20:02,970 --> 00:20:05,256 better than we ever dreamed. You have to go to him. 373 00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:09,558 Here's his home address. But you know what? He works late, 374 00:20:09,662 --> 00:20:11,929 so I wouldn't go before 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning. 375 00:20:12,304 --> 00:20:16,187 Oh, my God, thank you. But now I feel wrong keeping this. 376 00:20:16,292 --> 00:20:19,608 Oh, yeah, I wouldn't worry about that. That's made of candy. 377 00:20:20,182 --> 00:20:21,037 Later. 378 00:20:27,176 --> 00:20:31,099 Hey, go to lilyandmarshallselltheirstuff.com or charityfolks.com. 379 00:20:31,204 --> 00:20:32,840 We're having an auction to raise money 380 00:20:32,946 --> 00:20:34,601 for the children's hospital of Los Angeles. 381 00:20:34,708 --> 00:20:37,602 You can get a tone of cool stuff from the show and it's all for a great cause. 382 00:20:37,706 --> 00:20:38,990 - Thanks. - Thanks. 29853

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