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1
00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:05,640
- (MOANS SOFTLY)
2
00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:07,680
SOFTLY: Oh, that is so good.
3
00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:10,160
Oh my God.
4
00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:15,440
- Oh, sorry.
- It's fine, honestly.
5
00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:21,320
God, you have such strong fingers for
a burnt-out little twink. Who knew?
6
00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:25,680
- Thank you for calling me a twink
for the first time in five years.
7
00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:28,880
You got much on for today?
- Nope. Just this haircut.
8
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:32,800
This is my last haircut for ages,
so my mental wellbeing relies on it.
9
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:34,880
No pressure.
- Oh my God, please.
10
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,360
Sporty lesbians are like
my lowest maintenance clients.
11
00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:40,240
- Actually, I was thinking about
doing something different.
12
00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:44,280
- Mm, OK. Just so that
we're clear, if you ask me
to give you an undercut,
13
00:00:44,280 --> 00:00:48,280
I will have to escort you
off the premises.
14
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:51,120
www.able.co.nz
Copyright Able 2023
15
00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,200
- Set an alarm for 4.13pm.
16
00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:58,400
No, pm. Pm, pm, pm.
Set an alarm — 4.13pm.
17
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,200
- Whoa.
- Sorry.
18
00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:05,400
I just got an auto-bid in
for a change table, and I am
not gonna lose this one.
19
00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:06,880
- I thought you already
had a change table.
20
00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:09,080
- No, this is an over-the-cot
change table.
21
00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:11,520
- God, these babies — they don't
know how lucky they've got it.
22
00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:14,000
Just birthed into the world,
showered in gifts.
23
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:16,160
- I've already spent
thousands of dollars
24
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:19,520
and I still need to get
front packs, nappy bags...
25
00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:23,720
a snot sucker, which I think
means you suck snot out of their
nose into your own mouth.
26
00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:25,880
- Oh, right, well, that's the
grossest thing I've ever heard.
27
00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:29,720
- What's a front pack for?
- It's so you can carry
the baby in front of you.
28
00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:32,960
- So you literally just push
them out and then just chuck them
straight back where they were?
29
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:35,240
- Yeah, apparently they really
like sleeping in there.
30
00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:37,840
- I thought they slept in a cot.
- No, that's a bassinet.
31
00:01:37,840 --> 00:01:40,760
- So what's a cot for?
- Well, it's for sleeping,
but it's later.
32
00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:44,840
So it goes bassinet, cot, single,
double, queen, king, Cali king.
33
00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:46,840
- How do you know all that?
- Kardashians.
34
00:01:46,840 --> 00:01:48,880
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
- Stephanie.
35
00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:53,560
- What? Why is she here?
I specifically said for her not
to get here till 11 o'clock.
36
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,320
- Hey, look, this is a surprise for
Nat. We could still cancel it.
She'd never know.
37
00:01:57,320 --> 00:02:00,760
- Yeah, and what do we do
about my mother who has arrived
at the door very early?
38
00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:03,280
- We'll just tell her
you're stressed.
- I'm not stressed.
39
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,560
I'm just a little bit not relaxed.
40
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:08,160
But we are gonna do this,
because it's for Nat,
41
00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:12,000
and she is gonna love it and we are
all gonna have a very good time.
42
00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:16,080
But I do apologise in advance
for my mum being a total bitch.
43
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:18,080
- Sweet as.
- I'm coming!
44
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:23,320
- A bit not stressed (!)
She's gonna blow her top.
45
00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,120
- Happy baby shower!
- We're here.
46
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,440
- Yeah. You're both here...
very early.
47
00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:32,240
- Yes. Rosie wanted to get
here early to help decorate.
48
00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:35,840
- Oh no. It's just gonna be
really casual. We're not gonna
do decorations or anything.
49
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:39,480
- You can't have a baby shower
without a few decorations.
50
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:42,040
Don't worry. The balloons
are biodegradable.
51
00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,280
- Well, we'll all be able to sleep
tonight with a clear conscience.
52
00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:49,240
- Hello there, future grandchild.
(KISSES)
53
00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,240
- (CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
54
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:55,200
(SIGHS) OK, here you go.
55
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:57,960
- Your ankles haven't swollen up
too much, which is good.
56
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:00,360
- I was terrified to get my mother's
ankles when I was pregnant.
57
00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:02,560
Used to rotate them up
in the air every morning.
58
00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:05,720
- OK, Mum, you shouldn't comment
on women's bodies, like, ever,
59
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:07,760
but including when they're pregnant.
60
00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:12,360
- I said you were looking good.
Your face hasn't even got too puffy.
- (SCOFFS)
61
00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:15,640
- Now, look, I told Ned I was
having minor heart surgery today
62
00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:18,240
so she wouldn't call
and ruin her surprise.
63
00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:22,600
And look! I had them screen-printed
by that angry man in the mall.
64
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:26,480
Do you like it? Don't worry.
I've got us all one.
65
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,360
(GIGGLES) I've also got
some games planned.
66
00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:31,920
Nothing too intense.
Just a bit of silly fun.
67
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:35,040
Come on, Johnny.
Let's find a large bucket,
68
00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:38,640
and then we'll get the
rest of the balloons up.
69
00:03:38,640 --> 00:03:43,120
- That's it. I think it's time.
I think it's time for curtain bangs.
70
00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:46,440
- No. I make all my customers
do a psych test before
committing to bangs.
71
00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,720
- Oh, OK. I just don't want
anything that makes me
look like a mum, you know?
72
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,760
- No, no, no. We can do, like, MILF.
- Yeah, exactly.
73
00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:54,760
Curtain bangs, don't you reckon?
74
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:58,800
- Bangs are so fussy, you
will not cope with them. You
barely brush your hair.
75
00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:02,240
- OK, well, what about just, like—
like a straight-across bang?
76
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,480
- What did Steph say?
- It doesn't matter what Steph
says. It's my hair.
77
00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:08,840
- Right. She said no.
- I decide what I do with my hair.
78
00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:11,360
OK? And I've decided
that I want bangs.
79
00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:13,440
Bang me.
- (SIGHS) I'll tell you what.
80
00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:16,520
I'm gonna give you one minute
to decide if you're gonna betray
your girlfriend or not,
81
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:19,000
and I'll get you a drink.
What do you want?
82
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:21,280
I can do coffee, tea, milk, juice...
- (GASPS)
83
00:04:21,280 --> 00:04:23,240
Coff— did you say coffee?
- Mm-hm.
84
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,400
- I haven't had coffee for,
like, six months.
85
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:28,080
Steph not here... You know what?
86
00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:33,640
This is the last day
I'm gonna have to myself for,
like, the next 18 years,
87
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,640
and by golly...
88
00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:37,720
I am gonna sip on a coffee.
89
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:40,880
- Look at you. You, the rails —
you're off them. I love it.
90
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:43,720
Oat flat white?
- Single shot, please.
91
00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:47,880
Ooh, do you have cows milk?
- (SIGHS) I'm gonna call
Steph on you.
92
00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:49,960
- (BLOWS AIR)
93
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:51,960
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
94
00:04:52,280 --> 00:04:54,280
- (SIGHS)
95
00:04:55,480 --> 00:04:57,480
Whoa.
96
00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:00,720
- Oh, is she nearly here?
- Um, yeah, yeah.
97
00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:04,880
I'm sure she'll be on her way soon.
She was just getting a trim.
98
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:09,120
Hey, Rosie, how many games are
you planning on organising?
99
00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:12,640
It's just that Nat, like,
she actually didn't really want a
baby shower in the first place,
100
00:05:12,640 --> 00:05:14,640
so this might kind
of freak her out a bit.
101
00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:17,280
- Don't worry about it.
All my games are really low key.
102
00:05:17,280 --> 00:05:21,840
- Right. Is this enough poo
for 'Who Shat the Nap?'
- Christ.
103
00:05:21,840 --> 00:05:24,880
- Perfect.
- Great. I'll warm them up.
104
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:28,680
- Johnny, have you got
water in that tub?
105
00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:35,760
- So have you invited any of your
friends besides your landlord
and your sperm donor?
106
00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:37,800
- Yes, I have invited other people.
107
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:43,040
Meredith is coming and I have
invited a couple of Nat's friends.
- Meredith.
108
00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:45,840
I thought you didn't like
hanging out with her because she
made you feel insecure.
109
00:05:45,840 --> 00:05:48,160
- Oh, yeah, she does, but she's
been really generous, actually.
110
00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:52,360
She's lent us her very
expensive baby capsule, so, yeah,
she's my best friend now.
111
00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:55,920
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
- I'll get that. You get ready.
112
00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:58,640
- Wha— I am ready.
- Oh, but...
113
00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,120
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
- Fine. Fine.
114
00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:06,800
OK, can you, like,
give them a mimosa and just—
115
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:10,320
just try not to comment on anyone's
appearance. Can you do that?
116
00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:14,040
- Fix your face.
- I'm fixing it, I'm fixing it.
No comments. No comments.
117
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,360
- Ready?
- Yup.
118
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:18,240
- That's it. Brilliant! Fabulous!
119
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:22,320
- OK, yup.
- Have you got anything?
120
00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:24,320
(TENSE MUSIC)
121
00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:30,840
(CELL PHONE VIBRATES)
- OK, Nat. Are you sure you want
to go through with this?
122
00:06:30,840 --> 00:06:34,280
Because there's no
turning back after this.
123
00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:36,280
Are you awake? (GASPS)
124
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:47,920
OK, well, that is what
we're committing to then.
125
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:49,920
It's what she wanted.
126
00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:52,240
- (SIGHS)
127
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,440
- So do you— do you work out?
128
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:11,640
- Me? Oh, yeah, sometimes.
129
00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:14,920
- (SIGHS) Hi, guys.
130
00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:18,680
Good to see you.
Welcome to my humble abode.
131
00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:21,520
I was just— I just did
a bit of— a bit of makeup.
132
00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:25,080
Just went with sort of a soft glam.
(LAUGHS)
133
00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:28,120
Wonderful to see you. Welcome.
(ALL CHEER)
134
00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:31,400
Oh, Meredith! How are you?
Good to see you.
135
00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:33,440
- You too, yeah.
- And little...
136
00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:36,040
- Otis.
- ...matey-potatey. Otis!
137
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,040
Hi, Otis. How are you?
138
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,920
- Oh!
- Oh! That's a lovely kiss for Mummy.
139
00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:43,360
- Sorry we're late. Otis was getting
carried away with his messy play,
140
00:07:43,360 --> 00:07:46,920
and then we just could not decide
which learning resource for him
to play with here, so...
141
00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:50,600
- Oh, I think Johnny might have
some little toy cars in his room.
142
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,240
Do you like cars?
- They're resources, not toys.
143
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:56,600
- I like cars.
- He does like cars,
but they're not—
144
00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,520
Yeah, we're just kind of— we're on a
big Montessori buzz at the moment.
145
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:03,280
Just expanding this little brain
every day, aren't we, darling?
146
00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:05,680
- BOTH: Yeah.
- Oh, lucky you.
147
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,080
- You look fantastic, by the way.
- Oh, thank you.
148
00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,360
- Yeah. Hey, are you leaking yet?
149
00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,960
Cos if you are, syringe—
- From my vagina?
150
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:16,160
- No, no, no.
No — from your breasts.
- Oh— oh.
151
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:19,560
- Syringe and freeze the colostrum,
OK? Cos it is liquid gold.
152
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:22,280
- Oh, yeah, I was actually
reading about that, but I—
153
00:08:22,280 --> 00:08:25,200
- Oh, shoot. That reminds me —
I just left your other
present in the car.
154
00:08:25,560 --> 00:08:27,800
- No— oh, no.
You've gotten so much already.
155
00:08:27,800 --> 00:08:30,040
- It's nothing big, nothing big.
Please don't worry.
156
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:32,640
It's just a few weeks worth of
freezer meals that I whipped up.
157
00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:35,320
All organic.
- Of course you did.
158
00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,200
- WHISPERS:
Why did you invite Meredith?
159
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,040
- WHISPERS: She has really
expensive stuff and I need it.
160
00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,080
- Honestly, a human that together?
Honestly, she's hiding something.
161
00:08:43,080 --> 00:08:46,920
You know? It's like, you can't get
to a level like that unless
you've done some serious voodoo.
162
00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:48,720
- SOFTLY: I agree.
163
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:52,080
- When bub's about three weeks old,
you will think you've
hit rock bottom.
164
00:08:52,080 --> 00:08:54,760
Like, questioning everything.
165
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:59,120
And then boom, six weeks later, a
whole new rock bottom, one you
didn't even know you could reach.
166
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:02,920
And there you are, crying over the
kitchen sink, eating a dry Cruskit.
167
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,800
- Just don't divorce too early on,
OK? I mean, you'll want to.
168
00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:08,800
You'll really want to, but just
not those first few years, OK?
169
00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:11,240
You just have to work
through the anger and...
170
00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:14,720
disappointment and
loneliness and fear.
171
00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:19,400
- Does anyone want a sausage roll?
- Yes, please!
172
00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,400
- So how old are the twins now?
- Four.
173
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:25,000
I mean, I really think that
we turned a corner this year.
174
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,120
- This year?
- Mm.
175
00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:30,480
- Mm. The days are long, aren't
they? They are long days.
176
00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:32,760
But the years go flying past fast,
177
00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:36,440
and before you know it,
they're going on road trips
with the girlfriend.
178
00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:37,640
SOFTLY: Bitch.
179
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,680
- Don't overthink it.
- Yeah.
180
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,560
I guess I just don't want them
turning into, like, incels, you know?
- Who does?
181
00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:47,360
- Just make sure you talk
to them very early about porn.
182
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,360
- How early?
- Six.
183
00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:53,880
- Is Nat not here yet?
- Um, no, she's not— not quite.
184
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:58,280
- Oh, bugger it. OK, why don't we
just play one game while we wait?
185
00:09:58,280 --> 00:10:01,880
- LILY: Yes!
- How about 'Baby Bottle Chug'?
186
00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:04,800
- Ah, Rosie, I'm not really sure if
it's quite the right vibe for that.
187
00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:09,280
- CHANTS: Chug, chug, chug!
- Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
188
00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:11,320
(ALL CHEER)
189
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:15,000
- Be a man! Come on!
(ALL SCREAM)
190
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:20,400
- Yes! Queen of the game! Queen!
191
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:24,360
Yes! Queen.
I'm a queen of this game.
192
00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:27,160
- Well, that killed a few minutes.
193
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:31,600
- I don't even know what it is,
you know, but it's like...
194
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:36,720
one tiny baby bottle of beer and I
just want to go hard now, you know?
195
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:40,800
I want to— I want to get munted.
- (LAUGHS, WINCES)
196
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:44,600
- Hey, you do know you're
supposed to cut those before
you cook them, eh?
197
00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:48,000
- Yeah, I know, but I just got
excited about the idea of a
big, giant sausage roll,
198
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,320
and now I keep burning my fingertips.
199
00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:55,560
- (LAUGHS) It does actually look
pretty cool, but here, I'll do it.
200
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,920
- I didn't realise you were
trusted with sharp objects.
201
00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:04,240
- Oh, well, I am, actually,
but only when there's
another grown-up around.
202
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,240
Hey, hummus...
- Yeah.
203
00:11:08,560 --> 00:11:11,920
- ...good for babies
or terrible for babies?
204
00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:15,760
- I think bad, along with
soft cheeses and cold meats
205
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,160
and basically everything
on this platter.
206
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:21,520
- Oh, well, that's really
cool, isn't it? It's like the
babies aren't even here yet
207
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:23,880
and I've already tried to kill them.
- Nah, it'll be fine.
208
00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:27,120
We'll just fill it out
with some decorative flowers.
- Oh, that's perfect.
209
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,120
Thanks.
- All good.
210
00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:31,160
- Righty-oh.
211
00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,680
I should probably go and
pretend to have fun.
212
00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:38,880
- Yeah, yeah. You got this.
213
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:45,400
- Johnny.
- Hey, Mrs Douglas.
214
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:50,160
- Shelly. No more of that
prosecco lying around, is there?
- Um...
215
00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:54,080
- Well, I might just have to switch
over to wine and call the day done.
216
00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:57,160
- Yeah, right. Better get back to it.
217
00:11:57,160 --> 00:11:59,600
- You must be getting excited.
218
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:03,680
About to have two little
sprogs crawling around,
wanting to play with you.
219
00:12:03,680 --> 00:12:05,680
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
220
00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:10,440
- Given any thought to what the
children might call you?
221
00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:15,960
- Oh, well, I guess kids don't really
speak for ages, you know, so...
222
00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:19,200
- It wouldn't be Dad, would it?
Feels a bit confusing.
223
00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:21,280
Maybe Uncle, or...
224
00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:24,440
Or just Johnny?
225
00:12:24,680 --> 00:12:26,840
Depends how much you wanna
be involved, you know?
226
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:29,880
How much of your life
you're willing to give up.
- Mm.
227
00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:34,120
Yeah, well, Nat and Steph are
like family, so, you know, I'll be
there for them no matter what.
228
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:37,720
- No, of course. You know,
I'm only looking out for you
in all of this, Johnny.
229
00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:43,040
Which is why I think it might be
smart to formalise these things now.
230
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:46,040
For the sake of you
and the children.
231
00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:49,120
- What do you mean?
- Did Steph not mention the
parenting agreement
232
00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:54,840
we've had drawn up? Oh, I'll
get her to show it to you —
to read through and sign.
233
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:59,560
I appreciate this might
be a bit awkward, but better
to be safe than sorry.
234
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:03,720
Wouldn't want the special chapter
to ruin any relationships.
235
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,720
Don't you agree?
- Mm.
236
00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:08,720
- Yeah. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
237
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:12,200
Mmm! Sicilian olives. Divine.
238
00:13:17,640 --> 00:13:19,640
(TENSE MUSIC)
239
00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:30,640
- Everything OK?
- Yeah.
240
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:37,440
I'm fine, I'm just— I've got this—
241
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:41,200
I've got this random
crush on this guy.
242
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:44,120
- That must be confusing.
- Yeah.
243
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:48,960
- Identifying as gay and still
having the hots for a bloke.
244
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,040
- I'm straight.
- Hey?
245
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,560
Oh! Fabulous.
246
00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:58,520
- It's just like, he's my friend,
though, you know? And he's...
247
00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:02,200
He's great. But now
I'm being all weird and I don't
know how to be around him,
248
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:05,880
and it's just— it's stupid.
It feels stupid.
249
00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:09,120
- You've just got to get
out of the friendzone.
250
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,120
- You think?
- Yeah.
251
00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:13,800
The best relationships
start as friends.
252
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:16,760
I mean, you've got
kindness and respect,
253
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:18,880
but you need some alone time.
254
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:23,000
Take him out for a drink and then
pash him into boyfriend town.
255
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:25,000
Life is short, Lily.
256
00:14:25,400 --> 00:14:28,160
- I lost my voice. Must have been
really screaming, was I?
257
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,160
- Yeah, you were a bit loud.
258
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:33,400
- He's gorgeous!
- WHISPERS: How did you know?
259
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,600
- Got eyes in my head, girl.
- Oh, God. OK.
260
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:39,320
And just please keep this between us.
261
00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:41,320
- Mum's the word.
- OK.
262
00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:44,400
- Ooh, oh. Oh, oh my God.
263
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,800
- Morning. (CHUCKLES)
- Oh my God. (CHUCKLES)
264
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:51,760
Oh.
265
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,280
I— I have a—
266
00:14:55,120 --> 00:14:57,240
- Fringe, yes.
- ...a fringe now. Yeah, wow.
267
00:14:57,240 --> 00:15:00,840
- That's what you asked
for, so you got it.
- Yes, I did.
268
00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:02,840
I love it.
- Great, yeah.
269
00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:06,360
I think it really frames your...
270
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:08,920
forehead. It's great.
- Yeah. It's quite square.
271
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,120
- It's good.
- Ah, that's my coffee.
272
00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:12,320
- Yeah, it's been there for
a while, so I probably wouldn't—
273
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:16,560
- Mm, mm. That— that's curdled.
How long was I out for?
274
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:20,280
- Just long enough that
the client after you thought
you had died in the chair.
275
00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:23,040
- Oh, shit, shit. I've got to go.
I've got to go. I've got to go.
276
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:28,240
Thanks, Ricky. I'll phone bank pay
your money. Bye! Bye, love.
277
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:33,400
- I just hope nothing's happened.
278
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,480
- Maybe she's just gone
for a little walk.
279
00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:38,280
You know, sometimes
I like to go out in the woods
without my phone, just to—
280
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:40,120
- Scream?
- ...clear my head.
281
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:43,280
- Maybe I'll go look for her.
- Oh, oh, no, that's OK.
You don't have to go.
282
00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:45,680
- No, I'll just quickly drive
around. I won't be long.
- I'll come.
283
00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:49,840
- Honestly, you guys really
don't have to. It's fine. You
don't have to go anywhere.
284
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:52,600
- Yeah, we'll just check and see if
she hasn't broken down or something.
285
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,160
- WHISPERS: Please don't leave me.
Please don't leave me.
286
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:57,520
- No, no, go. We're happy here.
287
00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:59,680
Better to be safe than sorry.
288
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:01,680
Oh, your turn. Oh! Oh.
289
00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:09,080
- I thought we were all good.
You know, Nat and Steph
were gonna raise the babies,
290
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:15,200
and I was just gonna be around
for when they turned 16 and needed
someone to buy them booze.
291
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:18,600
I don't know. Maybe I should
just stop overthinking it
and just sign it.
292
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:22,640
I don't wanna overstep the mark,
you know, or make it weird.
293
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:25,800
Also, I do want to be involved.
- Of course, yeah.
294
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:31,120
And no one's questioning that.
- Yeah, I guess.
I'm just nervous, man.
295
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:36,040
I'm just nervous that I'm just
gonna make it harder for them and
the kids just by being around.
296
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:39,200
I should probably just move out.
Give them some space.
297
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:42,280
- No, no. No way.
Don't— don't do that.
298
00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,920
I wouldn't— I wouldn't like that.
299
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:49,520
- (CHUCKLES) Shut up.
- No, no. I'm serious.
300
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:52,880
I like having you around.
301
00:16:54,080 --> 00:17:00,000
You know, God, if you weren't there,
who would take all the mice out of
those traps that I kept setting,
302
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:04,200
and who would bring me coffee
in the morning and...
303
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:11,640
Who would do that sort of
funny bullying thing that you do
that actually feels like...
304
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:13,640
like flirting.
305
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:18,240
- You think I'm flirting with you?
306
00:17:18,880 --> 00:17:21,560
- I hope you're flirting with me.
307
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:31,680
OK.
- Sorry, I just thought—
308
00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:35,320
(SWELLING EMOTIONAL MUSIC)
309
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:49,000
(CICADAS CHIRP)
310
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,160
- Oh my God. Where have you been?
I've called you, like, 20 times.
311
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:54,560
- Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.
I'm so sorry. My phone died.
312
00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:56,960
- You've got a fringe.
- Yeah. I fell asleep in the chair.
313
00:17:56,960 --> 00:18:00,760
It was glorious, and then
Ricky sort of... Why— why is
your face like that?
314
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:04,000
- Why is your hair that way?
- What's going on?
315
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,800
- Surprise! Oh, my beautiful girl.
- Mum! Mum?
316
00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:11,960
- Oh my God! You've got a fringe.
- Yeah. Do you like it?
317
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:14,440
- There you are, Nat.
You had us worried sick.
318
00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:16,880
A new fringe.
319
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:19,240
It's brave.
320
00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:22,560
- Surprise.
321
00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:25,120
- (SIGHS)
- But seriously, what is
with the fringe?
322
00:18:25,120 --> 00:18:28,880
I thought that we decided that
juggling new babies and a new fringe
was too much for us at the moment.
323
00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:31,800
- OK, I can clip the fringe back.
OK? Why is it such a big deal?
324
00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:34,640
- It just reminds me of when
my dad shaved off his moustache
after the divorce.
325
00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:37,640
It's really unsettling when you
just change your appearance
without any warning.
326
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,720
- OK, this is gonna grow back, dude.
327
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:42,160
- I'm like, looking
at you right now and I'm just
thinking to myself, like,
328
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:44,800
'Where's Nat? Where's Nat? Where
are you?' I don't know this person.
329
00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,760
- OK, it is me, I am Nat, and
I've never felt more like myself.
330
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:52,840
- You've never felt more like
yourself? You look like you belong
in a rockabilly punk band.
331
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:58,520
- Making someone feel insecure
about a new haircut is about
as low as you can get, Steph.
332
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:03,880
- I would not have gone to so
much trouble and effort and care
to throw you a baby shower
333
00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:06,560
if I'd known that you were
just gonna leave all day
334
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:10,200
and transform yourself into
Zooey frickin' Deschanel.
335
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:11,360
- Fuck you.
- (GASPS)
336
00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:15,040
- I fuckin' hate Zooey Deschanel.
I'm sorry, Dita Von Teese,
337
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:18,320
that I didn't make it back
for your surprise baby shower
that I didn't ask for.
338
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:23,320
- This not even about the
baby shower. I don't even care
about the baby shower, Nat.
339
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:25,520
- Well, what is it about, Steph?
Is it about the fringe?
340
00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:29,160
- I feel like I am losing my grip
on who you are anymore.
341
00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:33,160
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
- Do you need anything in there?
342
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,800
- Yep, we're good. We're fine, Mum.
343
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:39,080
- We thought we could open
the presents. Meredith
has to go home soon.
344
00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:41,360
- Yeah, we'll be out in a sec.
345
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:46,080
- Nat, I just—
- No, no.
346
00:19:47,480 --> 00:19:50,040
I think we should just go back out.
347
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:52,040
Talk about this later.
348
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,480
What is that? Is this lube?
What is this?
349
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:03,240
- So I've spoken to
Johnny and he'll sign.
350
00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:05,840
- Freeze it. Honestly, it's gonna
save your vaginas. Trust me.
351
00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:09,680
- Wow, Cass, thank you so much.
That's a really thoughtful present.
352
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:12,080
- My vagina says 'thank you'.
353
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,720
- OK, my turn.
354
00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:18,520
Aw.
355
00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:22,560
Aw, Rosie, these are so beautiful.
356
00:20:23,120 --> 00:20:25,280
Thank you.
- Did you knit that?
357
00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:26,880
- I did.
- Oh, Mum.
358
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:30,080
- It's the same pattern you
had when you were a baby.
359
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:35,160
- You're gonna make me cry.
- OK, let's open your one next, Mum.
360
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:42,240
- Two tiny cloths for the babies.
361
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:46,320
That'll be— the babies will thank
you— the babies will love that.
362
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:50,400
- No, don't waste them on the
babies. Those are for you both.
363
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,800
- Hi, yeah, Nat! You're here.
364
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:56,160
We were just at the— we were
just at the club looking for you,
365
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,840
but you weren't there, so...
- No, cos I was at the hairdresser's.
366
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:01,440
- Yeah, yeah, right.
Oh, wow. That's short.
367
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,440
- Mm.
- OK.
368
00:21:04,120 --> 00:21:06,400
- Um...
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
369
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:11,320
- Oh, damn it. I lost out
on that change table.
370
00:21:11,360 --> 00:21:13,760
- Oh, the over-the-top ones.
371
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:19,240
- Yeah.
- That's a bummer. I got a
couple of my wishlist.
372
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:26,800
- Shall we play another
game of Beer Chug?
- Yeah, I'm in.
373
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:33,240
- I can confirm that both mothers
have been escorted off the premises.
374
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,640
And I'm sorry for
the surprise fringe.
375
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,880
Hopefully it'll grow on me,
376
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:47,560
and then you, and then it will
just grow back. Hopefully.
377
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:53,600
I don't think Peanut likes
it very much. They've been
kicking all afternoon.
378
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:55,600
- See you in bed.
- Yeah.
379
00:21:56,360 --> 00:21:58,360
Hey.
380
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:03,320
I'm really sorry things
didn't go as planned today.
381
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,000
- Thank you.
382
00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,840
(LAID-BACK FOLK MUSIC)
383
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:18,000
- Oh, that does look bad.
384
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:21,120
- # Hold on,
385
00:22:21,120 --> 00:22:26,520
# don't you give up on me now.
386
00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:30,120
# Hold on,
387
00:22:30,120 --> 00:22:35,200
# please don't leave me
when I'm down. #
34607
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