All language subtitles for Harley Quinn - 04x03 - Icons Only.EDITH.English.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 2 00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:19,978 Can you leave Tuesday, or... 3 00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:21,479 Sorry, that's leg day. 4 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:23,398 You know, the Bat family is all about group squats. 5 00:00:23,481 --> 00:00:24,983 Oh. What about next Thursday? 6 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:27,652 Ugh. Thursdays are my day for surveillance at the docks. 7 00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:29,779 Okay. Well, then, honey, when can you go? 8 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,656 Heroes deserve a day off. 9 00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:33,575 Even all those unvaccinated firefighters. 10 00:00:33,658 --> 00:00:35,326 You know what? Yeah. Yeah, let's just go this weekend. 11 00:00:35,452 --> 00:00:38,830 Actually, the Lexor in Vegas just reopened, 12 00:00:38,955 --> 00:00:40,373 and it's free for villains. 13 00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:42,584 Oh, yeah! Cheetah and Kanye renewed their vows there. 14 00:00:42,667 --> 00:00:46,379 Wait, isn't Clayface's residency starting this weekend? 15 00:00:46,504 --> 00:00:48,590 I've been getting so many targeted ads, it's like, ugh. 16 00:00:48,673 --> 00:00:50,967 Same! Oh, my God, I cannot believe we haven't talked about this. 17 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:54,054 He's singing the greatest hits of other Vegas residencies? 18 00:00:54,179 --> 00:00:56,306 Yes, and why is the trailer in French? 19 00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:59,100 Why is he taking a bubble bath in army fatigues? 20 00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:00,810 Yeah, like, who is the audience? 21 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,771 Anyone who couldn't get tickets to literally anything else. 22 00:01:05,522 --> 00:01:06,858 Totally. But actually, honey, 23 00:01:06,983 --> 00:01:08,777 you know, now that you're with the Bat family, 24 00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:11,488 you probably shouldn't stay at the evilest resort in Vegas. 25 00:01:11,571 --> 00:01:13,448 No, no, no. No, I miss you. 26 00:01:13,531 --> 00:01:14,741 I miss staying up all night, 27 00:01:14,866 --> 00:01:16,368 you know, getting into erotic mischief, 28 00:01:16,451 --> 00:01:17,702 feeding each other baby carrots. 29 00:01:17,827 --> 00:01:20,705 - Yeah, girl! - Let's go to Vegas! 30 00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:35,887 Okay, dial extension three if you need goons... 31 00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:37,889 - Ooh! - Four for guns, knives, tanks, 32 00:01:37,972 --> 00:01:40,140 and five for fresh towels. 33 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,393 Oh, the grenades are chocolate, 34 00:01:41,476 --> 00:01:43,186 but the chocolates are grenades. 35 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,604 Gonna save this for later. 36 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:47,190 Would you like me to have your suite pre-tarped 37 00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:50,235 before you deal with your hostage? Er, victim? 38 00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:51,569 Hey, you suck at whispering. 39 00:01:51,652 --> 00:01:53,154 - I am her girlfriend. - Hmm. 40 00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:55,824 Let me know if you need anything at all. 41 00:01:55,907 --> 00:01:57,450 Oh! Actually, uh, we do. 42 00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:59,828 We'd love a pair of tickets to the Clayface show. 43 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:02,163 We should probably just check it out while we're here, right? 44 00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:04,249 That show's been sold out for months. 45 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:08,086 Oh, wait. Are you serious? For real? 46 00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:09,169 But good news... 47 00:02:09,253 --> 00:02:11,589 Mr. Face generously invited you 48 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:14,300 to his pre-show pool party this afternoon. 49 00:02:14,426 --> 00:02:15,677 Ah, very subtle. 50 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:17,595 I'm just gonna have Nora handle the tickets. 51 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,764 Complimentary Blood-of-Your-Enemies shooter? 52 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:22,434 Yours has some of your fourth grade math teacher's. 53 00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:25,020 Oh. To the best weekend ever. 54 00:02:25,021 --> 00:02:26,062 Whoo! 55 00:02:26,062 --> 00:02:27,313 Ow! 56 00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:29,524 So what should we do first? Ooh! 57 00:02:29,607 --> 00:02:31,401 We should see that show Fall. 58 00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:34,863 The aerial circus show with the spikes instead of safety nets? 59 00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:38,324 Uh, you know what would be so unexpected and subversive? 60 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:40,368 Going to see the glass-blown ceiling garden 61 00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:42,871 designed by famous blind artist Dale Chihuly. 62 00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:44,414 And on the way back, 63 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:46,416 we stop at the M&M's store, scoop a couple L.B.'s? 64 00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:49,293 I know a candy-coated chocolate makes you horny. 65 00:02:49,377 --> 00:02:51,963 Oh! 66 00:02:52,047 --> 00:02:53,423 Should I call for tarp? 67 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:12,484 I want that one with the fat ass! 68 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:15,779 Ugh. So sorry we had to wait in line for three hours. 69 00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:19,115 Hey, at least we got to see that M&M's through the years display. 70 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,909 Pretty fun to see the tan ones, huh? 71 00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:22,619 Yeah, no, totally. 72 00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,997 I also loved hearing so many babies screaming in line. 73 00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:30,001 Ah, free guns! What? And with airbrushing? Oh! 74 00:03:33,505 --> 00:03:35,340 Do... Do you wanna deal with that, or... 75 00:03:35,423 --> 00:03:37,841 No. Work can wait. I don't wanna interrupt these sexy party vibes! 76 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,053 Ma'am, is this hero bothering you? 77 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:41,721 Oh, shit, King! 78 00:03:41,846 --> 00:03:43,055 Green Goddess! 79 00:03:43,180 --> 00:03:46,643 Tabitha, you remember my boss and my former boss. 80 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,853 I told you, this is my babymoon. 81 00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:50,730 I wanna fuck a magician. 82 00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:52,273 Uh, yes, ma'am. 83 00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:55,235 Tabitha and our nine unborn children are here to party. 84 00:03:55,360 --> 00:04:00,031 And I'm here to support them in whatever way is least annoying to her. 85 00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:01,658 Ugh! Cover your gills. 86 00:04:01,741 --> 00:04:03,743 I can feel you breathing on my hammer. 87 00:04:03,868 --> 00:04:06,037 Uh, Miss Ivy, Elvis has requested you join him 88 00:04:06,121 --> 00:04:08,707 for some white rhino bone marrow in his cabana. 89 00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:10,083 Oh, okay. 90 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,710 I mean, it is Elvis. 91 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,420 Well, of course. 92 00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:19,634 Harley, I'm worried Tabitha won't let me co-parent with her. 93 00:04:19,718 --> 00:04:21,803 And I want to be part of these sharks' lives. 94 00:04:21,886 --> 00:04:24,681 Yeah, that's a tough one. She seems to hate you. 95 00:04:24,764 --> 00:04:27,642 Yo, hook me up with a couple of those green ones. 96 00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:32,731 Chocolate? I thought they were benzos! 97 00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:35,734 I need to get this taste out of my mouth. 98 00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:40,363 Uh, I'm sorry. 99 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:41,740 Should you be smoking cigarettes 100 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:43,116 since you're, like, extremely pregnant? 101 00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:45,409 Don't humansplain my body to me. 102 00:04:45,493 --> 00:04:47,078 Yeah, you heard her! 103 00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:50,206 Would it kill you to look up "shark placenta"? 104 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:51,791 Mmm-hmm. 105 00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:54,336 Now scram! 106 00:04:54,419 --> 00:04:56,755 Should... Should I check on our fruit medley? 107 00:04:56,838 --> 00:04:59,466 You know that famous gumbo from my kingdom? 108 00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:02,093 Of course! Hakarl gumbo! 109 00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:05,555 I mean, there's a beloved folk song about how hard it is to make. 110 00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:07,891 Yeah, I want that. 111 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:12,562 My brood's wish is my command. 112 00:05:13,646 --> 00:05:14,814 Hey, how was Elvis? 113 00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:16,608 Wait, no, no. How was the white rhino? 114 00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:18,526 - No, wait, Elvis first! - Um, ugh on both, actually. 115 00:05:18,610 --> 00:05:20,570 But you know who never underwhelms? 116 00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,572 Benjamin fuckin' Franklin! 117 00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:24,157 Okay! Who should we bet on? 118 00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,745 I wish I could bet on this death match. 119 00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,778 Bad odds with Rag Doll's loose stitching, 120 00:05:30,779 --> 00:05:32,290 but I do like his wiry energy. 121 00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:52,977 Wait, no one saw me cheering for this, right? 122 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:56,815 Hey, so where are we with the, uh, Clayface tickets? 123 00:05:56,898 --> 00:05:58,483 I can get backstage with Celine, 124 00:05:58,608 --> 00:06:01,194 a meet and greet with Britney, but nada for Clayface. 125 00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,071 I mean, can't you just ask him? 126 00:06:03,154 --> 00:06:04,823 Yeah. No, I can't do that. 127 00:06:04,948 --> 00:06:08,076 I may have ignored a few emails that he may have sent 128 00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:10,161 specifically about this exact subject, 129 00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:11,245 so just keep trying. 130 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,997 Wow! Even I have tickets. 131 00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:19,123 I guess CEO stands for "Can't Even do" capital "O" shit. 132 00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:22,340 Uh, ew. No. Troll. 133 00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:24,342 I already have tickets, man. 134 00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:27,095 I'm just... I need extra tickets in case I want seats for our purses. 135 00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:30,015 Yeah, very cool obvious lies, 136 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:32,475 so I got to ask, what's with the narc? 137 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:35,353 This party is for hotties and villskies only. 138 00:06:35,478 --> 00:06:39,691 For your FYI, I'm having a very fun, very villlski time, 139 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,651 within the limits of my new occupation. 140 00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:44,988 The Harley I know would have flicked my taint 141 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,781 for even questioning her. 142 00:06:48,366 --> 00:06:50,869 Help! 143 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,707 The Harley I know would have let me drown. 144 00:06:56,832 --> 00:06:59,586 You know what? I actually need to run back to our room for a sec. 145 00:06:59,711 --> 00:07:00,879 Can't let our bounty melt! 146 00:07:01,004 --> 00:07:02,464 Are you sure you don't want to stay? 147 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,215 We could get, like, matching pedicures. 148 00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:05,884 Well, I guess I could. 149 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,060 Um, you stay. I'm fine. 150 00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,937 You deserve to be pampered by these evil cuties. 151 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:19,397 Okay, cool. 152 00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:22,108 Yes! 153 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,569 Make that pool noodle cry. 154 00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,196 Whoo! 155 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:42,045 Oh, kisses at you! 156 00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:43,128 Kiss, kiss. 157 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:45,507 Oh, for dick's sake. 158 00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:48,093 You look gorgeous! 159 00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:49,427 Ugh. 160 00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:55,100 Well, well, if it isn't my old so-and-so, Poison Ivy. 161 00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:56,433 No, good, I'm good. 162 00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:58,186 - Don't need any... - Whoo! 163 00:07:58,269 --> 00:08:00,313 I fucking love you, Clayface! 164 00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:02,816 Ha! I love you too, sweetie! 165 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:05,235 See you at tonight's show, I assume. 166 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:07,779 Unless, you don't have tickets. 167 00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:10,115 Oh, we're good. Yeah, we got tickets. 168 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:13,952 Front row, orchestra seats six and seven, actually. 169 00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:15,495 Splendid! 170 00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:19,124 I look forward to seeing you there in those exact seats. 171 00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:22,293 Ga-Ga, darling! I got the flowers! 172 00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:27,132 How did you know I was a gladiola girl? 173 00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:34,972 Coming at you live from the yard at Blackgate Penitentiary, 174 00:08:35,097 --> 00:08:39,477 let's make some noise for DJ Daddy'$ Money! 175 00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:43,188 Is that motherfucking Bruce Wayne? 176 00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:47,485 Bruce is in prison and still gets to be a shitty daytime deejay, 177 00:08:47,610 --> 00:08:50,989 but I can't even enjoy Vegas with my sumptuous life partner? 178 00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,408 I'll tell you why he gets to be a shitty deejay. 179 00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:57,203 Think about it. Bruce and Batman are two different people. 180 00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:58,997 Of course! 181 00:08:59,122 --> 00:09:01,499 Superheroes all have secret identities. 182 00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:03,960 All my identities are public! 183 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,963 If you had an alter ego, you could party with Ivy 184 00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:09,841 without getting in trouble with the Bat family. 185 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:11,926 Do you have a breath mint? 186 00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:14,262 Don't want any of those shrimp tails 187 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:15,972 to get caught in your pretty pink hair. 188 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:17,265 All right. Are we doing this? 189 00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:19,517 I've always wanted to party in Vegas. 190 00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:21,102 So many people to analyze! 191 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,521 Oh, no, you're not coming out, four-eyes. 192 00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:25,148 This is a job for... 193 00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:28,526 Hargret. 194 00:09:28,651 --> 00:09:29,903 Yes! 195 00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:32,697 Do not leave me in the mirror, you skank! 196 00:09:53,677 --> 00:09:55,387 Throw down, you bouncy little bitch! 197 00:09:58,014 --> 00:09:59,391 Whoa! 198 00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:16,199 How dare you cheat on me? 199 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:17,409 It's me, Harley Quinn. 200 00:10:17,534 --> 00:10:19,202 Yeah, sweetie, I know. You're wearing my bra. 201 00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:21,329 This is just my natural perk, baby. 202 00:10:21,413 --> 00:10:22,956 So I love this whole vibe. 203 00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,791 But are you going to get in trouble with the Bat family 204 00:10:24,874 --> 00:10:26,668 for, like, everything that you're doing right now? 205 00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:28,545 Harley might. But Hargret will not. 206 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,255 Okay, I like the sound of that. 207 00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:32,590 Now we can party like we used to. 208 00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:34,551 I'm talking jugs out, rugs out, 209 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:37,762 steal a car just to crash it into an even nicer car. 210 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,765 Well, bitch, I can't argue with your logic 211 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,434 or your legendary rack. 212 00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:45,103 Then we'll go get those fuckin' Clayface tickets, baby. 213 00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:47,897 - Whoo! - Let's fucking ride. 214 00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:54,362 Fuck yeah! 215 00:10:56,573 --> 00:10:58,450 Hah! 216 00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:02,620 Bar man! 217 00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:06,458 Ha! I hear you're the guy to talk to about some primo Columbian. 218 00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,418 I am so that guy! 219 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:12,130 Wanna do some bumpies behind the "And Just Like That" slot machine? 220 00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:15,342 I was thinking someplace a little more soundproof, 221 00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:16,843 like your room. 222 00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:19,012 - My room? - Mmm-hmm. 223 00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:22,140 All right, gumbo. I can do this. 224 00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:28,521 Hey, I hear you deal in exotic rarities. 225 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,440 Yes. But it's gonna cost you. 226 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:34,486 Ew! Ugh! Damn! This is supposed to be a hotel! 227 00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:36,905 Why aren't people having sex in their room? 228 00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:48,875 Ow! 229 00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,174 Oh! 230 00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:59,177 Onions? Well, I have those in the room. 231 00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:00,345 Hmm? 232 00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:01,428 Hello, ma'am. 233 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,598 I'm sorry! 234 00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,476 It'll grow back, right? 235 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,062 Yeah. 236 00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,855 Front desk messed up my res. 237 00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:13,233 I usually get a super baller room. 238 00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:16,361 Can we do it on the other bed? 239 00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:18,071 This is my eating bed. 240 00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:22,200 Whoa! 241 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:24,536 Give me your Clayface tickets or I'll fucking kill you. 242 00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,038 I don't have them! I swear! 243 00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,249 He's lying. 244 00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:30,458 Ow! 245 00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:32,002 No, I'm not! 246 00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:34,379 I was gonna dress up as a bellhop and ambush a guy. 247 00:12:34,504 --> 00:12:35,672 Bullshit. What guy? 248 00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,716 Some hick who won a radio contest. 249 00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:39,732 He's supposed to meet the concierge 250 00:12:39,733 --> 00:12:41,469 at 5:00 p.m. to pick up the tickets. 251 00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:43,388 - Should we kill him? - I have a better idea. 252 00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:47,392 Hope you're not a mouth breather. 253 00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:56,401 How long do you think it'll take him to realize it's just chocolate? 254 00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:58,570 What? What's happening right now? 255 00:12:58,653 --> 00:13:02,490 That ill-fitting polyester is, uh, kind of doing it for me. 256 00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:05,285 Is it? Okay. 257 00:13:08,538 --> 00:13:11,583 How come yours is tear away and mine has, like, 30 buttons! 258 00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:16,004 Oh, that tickles. 259 00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:18,757 I fucking love Vegas! 260 00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:26,097 Oh, my God. I mean, we have done a lot of freaky foreplay, 261 00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:28,141 but it was, like, particularly awesome. 262 00:13:28,266 --> 00:13:29,392 I mean, you've never done 263 00:13:29,393 --> 00:13:32,020 that flip-reverse-two-handed move before. Whoo! 264 00:13:32,103 --> 00:13:34,773 Can we bring Hargret back to Gotham or what? 265 00:13:34,856 --> 00:13:36,274 - Um... - I mean, not like... 266 00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:38,026 Obviously not instead of you. I... 267 00:13:38,109 --> 00:13:39,527 Yeah. No, no, I know. 268 00:13:43,198 --> 00:13:44,491 All right, let's get these fucking tickets. 269 00:13:55,251 --> 00:13:56,753 Hold up. It's a cancer kid? 270 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,713 Look, maybe the mom has Munchausens. 271 00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:00,632 She's the real monster here. 272 00:14:00,715 --> 00:14:01,903 Right. Let's just take his parents' tickets 273 00:14:01,904 --> 00:14:03,927 - and go to the show with him. - No, we can't do that. 274 00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:05,553 We need the third seat for our purses. 275 00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,103 Ha-ha! 276 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:16,815 'Tis I, the elusive chanteuse 277 00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:18,566 Clayface. 278 00:14:18,650 --> 00:14:20,568 ♪ La, la, la, la ♪ 279 00:14:20,652 --> 00:14:22,070 Wait, where's my son? 280 00:14:22,153 --> 00:14:24,197 You twisted little freak. 281 00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:26,574 I knew you didn't have tickets. 282 00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:28,326 All you had to do was reply 283 00:14:28,410 --> 00:14:32,622 to one of the baker's dozens of emails and texts 284 00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:35,165 I sent about my show. 285 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:37,877 Oh, what's a few unread texts between friends? 286 00:14:38,003 --> 00:14:41,339 No one cares for your opinion, stranger. 287 00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:43,383 You think you can swan in here 288 00:14:43,508 --> 00:14:47,262 and swing your big boss dick around and get anything you want? 289 00:14:47,345 --> 00:14:51,641 I have eyes and ears and Ramonas everywhere. 290 00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:53,977 Dial six if you feel like a fool. 291 00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:57,647 You get one residency, and suddenly you're all, 292 00:14:57,731 --> 00:15:01,526 "Ooh, la, la, I'm Clayface. I'm a big, uh, diva." 293 00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:05,238 You dare call moi a diva? 294 00:15:05,363 --> 00:15:07,240 Do you know who you're fucking talking to right now? 295 00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:09,576 Do you know who you're talking to? 296 00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:10,702 Yeah. 297 00:15:10,827 --> 00:15:11,827 I do. 298 00:15:11,828 --> 00:15:13,997 Boop. 299 00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:19,210 Hey, babe, can we, uh, sidebar away from all these innocent bystanders? 300 00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:39,564 Hope you sing better than you throw, bitch. 301 00:15:42,025 --> 00:15:43,568 Nom, nom, nom, nom... 302 00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:44,651 Not again! 303 00:15:44,736 --> 00:15:47,155 Villains are destroying the buffet. 304 00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,074 Someone call a hero! 305 00:15:49,199 --> 00:15:51,034 Ooh, my hero instincts. 306 00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:11,096 And that's why you always bet on Bat. 307 00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:12,681 Yes! 308 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,563 Hey! Cut this shit out! 309 00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:23,274 Harley! I hate to be the bearer of bad news, 310 00:16:23,358 --> 00:16:25,068 but I also kind of love it. 311 00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:28,655 Ivy is stepping out on you with a Vegas-six in a tacky pink wig. 312 00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:31,616 Okay, Hargret's at least a Gotham eight. 313 00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,661 Ugh, get out of my way, Harls! 314 00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:37,372 Do you really wanna kill a bunch of innocent people over tickets? 315 00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:38,790 - Absolutely! - More than anything. 316 00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,883 What happened to being my supportive girlfriend? 317 00:16:48,967 --> 00:16:49,968 Sorry, Ive. 318 00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,813 Okay, look, dude. Mazel on the show. 319 00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:03,565 We're super proud of you, even though we would never tell you. 320 00:17:03,648 --> 00:17:07,652 Easy to say now that I am a bona fide success! 321 00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:08,819 The gall! 322 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:10,280 I may not even go on tonight 323 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:13,324 after what you bitches bedraggled through. 324 00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:15,492 Listen, listen! You're mad, I get it, okay? 325 00:17:15,617 --> 00:17:16,994 But you should know that your rage 326 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,830 is making your forehead wrinkles pop. 327 00:17:19,955 --> 00:17:21,665 Don't look at me! 328 00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:26,588 Is this your card? 329 00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,088 No! 330 00:17:28,173 --> 00:17:30,342 Shit. No? Okay, hold on. 331 00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:32,677 Take it off, magic boy! 332 00:17:32,761 --> 00:17:34,179 I did it! 333 00:17:34,304 --> 00:17:35,513 I got the gumbo! 334 00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:37,098 What? How? 335 00:17:37,182 --> 00:17:39,225 Who cares? Give it to me. 336 00:17:42,854 --> 00:17:44,397 Things are happening. 337 00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,941 Baby things? Or is it the soup? 338 00:17:47,025 --> 00:17:48,860 The soup is supposed to induce labor. 339 00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:50,612 What? That's not in the song. 340 00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:53,365 Ugh. You must have listened to the radio edit. 341 00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:55,408 All right, who's gonna be my next victim? 342 00:17:55,533 --> 00:17:57,285 I mean, volunteer. 343 00:17:57,369 --> 00:17:59,537 - Me? - What? 344 00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:03,041 Look, you know I could get out of this if I wanted to. 345 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:05,418 I know, but I needed you to calm down. 346 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:06,878 Shit was getting out of hand. 347 00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:10,215 I was getting out of hand? LOL. Okay, Hargret. 348 00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:12,133 Listen, I'm sorry. 349 00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:14,219 I didn't know how to bring the new me to our relationship. But... 350 00:18:14,344 --> 00:18:18,348 Oh, yeah, baby, I, I just don't really care about the tickets. 351 00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:19,808 I just got worried. 352 00:18:19,891 --> 00:18:21,685 Like, what do we have to connect over 353 00:18:21,768 --> 00:18:25,063 if we can't even make fun of Clayface's show? 354 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,528 Is this your card? 355 00:18:32,570 --> 00:18:35,073 Is anyone in the audience a doctor? 356 00:18:35,156 --> 00:18:37,242 A marine biologist? 357 00:18:37,367 --> 00:18:40,537 No? What... What about a shark doula? 358 00:18:44,249 --> 00:18:47,085 There, there. Is this soothing? 359 00:18:47,210 --> 00:18:49,504 Do you feel soothed? 360 00:18:49,587 --> 00:18:52,048 Harley! You two are real ones! 361 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,383 I'm so happy you're here. 362 00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:54,926 I'm gonna need you to push. 363 00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:59,180 I am pushing, you sexy top-hatted shitbag! 364 00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:00,640 She is pushing! 365 00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:02,434 I see a fin! 366 00:19:10,358 --> 00:19:12,736 That's eight. Wait, nine's still in there 367 00:19:12,819 --> 00:19:13,862 Push, Mama, push! 368 00:19:13,945 --> 00:19:16,531 I'm not your Mama! 369 00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:20,452 - He's not breathing. - What? 370 00:19:41,973 --> 00:19:43,641 Is this your card? 371 00:19:43,767 --> 00:19:45,310 That's my card! 372 00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:47,520 That's my card! 373 00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:59,282 It is I, the missing piece of your friendship pie. 374 00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:00,658 Save it for your show! 375 00:20:00,784 --> 00:20:03,036 To celebrate this momentous day, 376 00:20:03,161 --> 00:20:08,333 I am gifting these new bebes front row seats to my show. 377 00:20:10,627 --> 00:20:13,296 - Fuck you. - You bitch. 378 00:20:13,380 --> 00:20:15,965 Now, as written in our great sea laws, 379 00:20:16,049 --> 00:20:18,932 the two dykes in closest proximity 380 00:20:18,933 --> 00:20:21,513 to the birth shall be the godparents. 381 00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:23,890 Hey, but screw tradition. 382 00:20:24,015 --> 00:20:25,308 Harley and Ivy, 383 00:20:25,392 --> 00:20:27,852 would you do us the honor of being godmothers? 384 00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:30,355 - Fuck yeah! - Of course, we'll be godparents. 385 00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:33,358 Okay, well, I'm gonna jet back under the sea now. 386 00:20:33,441 --> 00:20:34,441 What do you mean? 387 00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:36,319 I wanna co-parent. 388 00:20:36,403 --> 00:20:38,071 We are gonna co-parent. 389 00:20:38,196 --> 00:20:41,658 I'm taking the first born and you can have the rest or whatever. 390 00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:45,620 You took care of me today so I think you'll be an okay Dad. 391 00:20:45,704 --> 00:20:47,706 Peace. 392 00:20:52,627 --> 00:20:53,627 Ive. 393 00:20:53,628 --> 00:20:55,213 - What? Say it. - I shouldn't... 394 00:20:55,296 --> 00:20:57,007 Well, now you... Honey, you've gotta say something now. 395 00:20:57,090 --> 00:21:00,802 Okay? Those sharklings are like fugly. 396 00:21:00,885 --> 00:21:03,596 Oh, my fucking God! Thank you. 397 00:21:03,722 --> 00:21:07,058 I, I'm just so glad I'm not the only full grown asshole. 398 00:21:07,142 --> 00:21:10,270 Mine was, like, wet, but also, like, sticky? 399 00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:11,896 So sticky! 400 00:21:12,022 --> 00:21:14,607 I mean, that one looks like a booger, right? 401 00:21:16,568 --> 00:21:18,401 Oh, my God. This one's just like a pair of googly eyes 402 00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:19,404 stuck on a flaccid dong. 403 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:21,698 He always has his eye on you. 404 00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:23,825 - Or is that his tooth? - Oh, my God. 405 00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:26,911 Yeah, the little one looked like it was old and young 406 00:21:26,995 --> 00:21:30,081 and like, dead and alive, all at the same time. 407 00:21:30,165 --> 00:21:33,084 Like a little baby Benjamin Button with fins. 408 00:21:33,209 --> 00:21:35,545 Yes! Yes! 409 00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:40,091 Ive, I decided to move in with the Bat family. 410 00:21:40,216 --> 00:21:41,885 Whoa, what? 411 00:21:41,968 --> 00:21:44,429 It's just too hard to integrate my new job into my old life. 412 00:21:44,512 --> 00:21:45,513 I need to immerse myself 413 00:21:45,597 --> 00:21:48,058 in pure uncut hero culture 414 00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:49,726 until it becomes second nature. 415 00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:52,270 Yeah. Okay. Go... Go for it. 416 00:21:52,354 --> 00:21:53,605 - Really? - Yeah. 417 00:21:53,688 --> 00:21:58,193 I mean, this is us figuring out how to make 418 00:21:58,276 --> 00:22:00,403 our new jobs work, right? 419 00:22:00,487 --> 00:22:02,280 Just, um, don't take too long. 420 00:22:02,364 --> 00:22:04,491 Mmm. 421 00:22:04,616 --> 00:22:05,950 Oh, I almost forgot! 422 00:22:06,034 --> 00:22:09,204 I picked up a little something at the buffet. 423 00:22:09,287 --> 00:22:11,790 Oh, God, no. This one looks like one of the babies. 424 00:22:11,915 --> 00:22:15,752 Oh, no! It does! The striped one. 425 00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:19,089 Open up. 426 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:25,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 31444

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