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♪ dramatic techno music playing ♪
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♪
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JULIO:
It's Ruby! She's the one texting us!
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00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:08,300
SONNY:
Everyone on the fucking ground!
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00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:09,676
LUIS:
I can be your hero, baby.
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00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:11,637
JULIO:
Ask for a plane.
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LUIS:
I'm not that little, homey!
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JULIO:
Shut up, bitch.
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00:00:13,597 --> 00:00:16,433
SERGEANT:
New York City, the Big Apple!
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JULIO:
Sonny, behind you. The gun.
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♪
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♪
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- You should be ashamed of yourselves.
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Playing with our emotions like that.
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You know what?
When the pizza comes,
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me and Sonny are gonna eat it all.
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No pizza for you.
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FARHAD: You're never going
to get a pizza or plane.
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You're going to die on an empty stomach.
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- Shut the fuck up.
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And you.
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How the fuck did you do
that shit with our phones?
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- I saw you fuckin' idiots
whining about your exes,
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so I went into your contacts
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and changed their numbers to my number,
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and texted you
a bunch of fake-ass bullshit.
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- How'd you know our passwords?
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- Every dude's password is the same.
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Zero, zero, zero, zero.
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[sirens wailing in distance]
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- Fuck.
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Well, for the record,
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I do have a big-ass dick.
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- Yeah, me, too.
That's why I fell for it.
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- If you guys really had big dicks,
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your women wouldn't have
left you for better men.
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- So you wanna see it, huh?
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Is that what it's gonna take
to prove it to you? Alright.
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- Dawg, don't take your dick out.
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You don't need his approval.
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We know what we got.
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SONNY:
Yeah, you're right.
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Hey, let's block the fuckin' doors
so these assholes don't try to escape.
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- Oh, my God. Men who think
they have big dicks are ruining the world.
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- Wait, so,
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you think I'm ruining the world?
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- No.
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- Oh, so now I have a small dick?
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- Luis, goddamn.
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♪ theme music playing ♪
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♪
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♪
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♪ dramatic music plays on TV ♪
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NEWSCASTER 1 [on TV]:
As the chase continues into the night,
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the authorities have been able to identify
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the alleged bank robbers
as Erika Sanchez and Ernie Alvarez.
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NEWSCASTER 2 [on TV]:
But who gives a hoot
about their real names?
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We're calling this couple...
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NEWSCASTERS:
Bonnie and Clyde.
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NEWSCASTER 1:
Move over, Romeo and Juliet.
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There's new star-crossed lovers in town.
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[phone buzzing]
NEWSCASTER 2: People are on the side
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of the highway with signs...
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- Hello?
ESPERANZA [over phone]: Julio.
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Uh...
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Hey, how do you guys
say "hostage" in Spanish?
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- I don't fuckin' know.
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- I don't know.
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- Uh--
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[Julio speaking Spanish]
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[helicopter blades whirring]
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[continues speaking Spanish]
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- Ouch, hey.
Get the fuck off me.
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LUIS:
Fuck, I can't, dawg.
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Just give me a second, alright?
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I need to talk to her.
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Hey. [whistles]
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Ruby?
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I was just thinking how, like,
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this whole situation
is pretty traumatic, huh?
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- Uh-huh.
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LUIS:
So, you know they say that
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traumatic situations like this,
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they bring people
closer together and shit.
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So, this whole thing's kinda
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taking our relationship to the next level,
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whether either of us like it or not.
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But for the record,
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I kinda like it.
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- Can you just please fuckin' drop it?
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I'm not in the mood to talk
about this shit with you right now.
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- Well, I am in the mood
to talk about it right now.
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Why don't you wanna be my lady?
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- Alright, you wanna talk about it?
Let's talk about it.
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One, you ain't got a job.
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That's a problem for me.
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My ex-husband didn't work,
and it fucked us up.
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And two, and I know this sounds messed up,
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but when you weren't able
to take Sonny down,
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it was kind of a turnoff for me.
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- Are you fuckin' serious?
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You're coming at me like that right now?
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Well, fuck you then.
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[scoffs]
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FARHAD: Get off of me.
[Luis groans]
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- Fuck.
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- Hello?
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[rattles]
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SONNY:
That's it.
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I can't hold it anymore, dawg.
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I gotta take a fuckin' piss.
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JULIO:
Oh, it's cool.
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I'll look after the hostages
while you take a leak.
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Uh, just give me one of the guns.
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- [chuckles] Yeah, I mean, I trust you,
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but not that much.
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Oh, come on, big dawg.
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We're here already, at the toilet.
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Let's do some work.
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Do your thing, come on.
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[sighs] Please.
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- [whispering] Look, hey, I'm sorry.
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I shouldn't have said that shit earlier.
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- Well, you know what? Just to clarify,
he didn't beat my ass, alright?
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Doesn't even matter anyway
'cause we're broken up now.
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Now you're just some random hyna
I'm in a hostage situation with.
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- Oh, yeah, well, we can't break up
if we were never together, stupid ass.
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- Goddammit, both of you shut the fuck up.
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Can't even fuckin' concentrate.
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[sighs]
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Fuck, now it's too quiet.
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00:04:57,256 --> 00:04:59,216
It's like everybody's sitting around
waiting for me to go or something.
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00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,592
[Ruby sighs]
It's making me nervous.
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00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:03,095
Like, hum a song or some shit.
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00:05:03,095 --> 00:05:04,429
- What song?
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- I don't give fuck, anything.
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00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,018
Start singing!
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00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:11,228
Or I'm gonna fuckin' shoot somebody.
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- ♪ Oh, say can you see ♪
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SONNY:
Everybody, everybody. Everybody sing.
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[all singing]
♪ By the dawn's early light ♪
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SONNY:
Oh, here we go.
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- ♪ What so proudly-- ♪
[grunting]
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- Oh, ho, ho, ho!
[urinating]
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Oh, gah, thank God.
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- ♪ And we're inside the bathroom ♪
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- ♪ An American ♪
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- ♪ Come and rescue us, please ♪
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♪ vocalizes ♪
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LUIS:
♪ To celebrate, we sing ♪
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♪ all singing off-key ♪
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- Oh, my God.
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00:05:42,134 --> 00:05:43,177
Thank you.
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[siren wails]
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♪ upbeat whimsical music playing ♪
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♪
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00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:02,529
[helicopter blades whirring]
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- Thirty minutes on the dot.
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00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:05,616
Look at you guys.
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00:06:05,616 --> 00:06:06,867
[chuckles] Thank you, sweetheart.
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00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,035
Hey, Rookie.
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Tip the nice delivery person.
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And don't be cheap.
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ROOKIE:
Here you go, um--
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Just take it all. Thank you.
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SERGEANT:
Alright.
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Dig in, everybody.
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- Hey, hey, hey, what the hell?
Those are for the hostages.
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- Let us worry about the pizza, Rook.
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- What if it was
your son or daughter in there?
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♪ melancholic music playing ♪
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Would you still be
stuffing your faces with pizza?
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It's our job to serve and protect
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the people of this city.
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♪
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[indistinct radio chatter]
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SERGEANT:
Wow.
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You know, sometimes
it's the young guys on the force
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who remind us old farts
what we're doing all this for.
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You're absolutely right.
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They wanted pizza.
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So we're gonna give 'em pizza.
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Right?
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♪ uplifting patriotic music playing ♪
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And I know the perfect guy to deliver it.
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00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,921
Uh-oh. [laughs]
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00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,089
Wink.
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00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,465
It's you.
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00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:06,051
Come on, don't be afraid.
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If you don't get shot,
maybe he'll tip you.
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00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:11,390
He's got a lot of money. Robbed a bank.
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[siren wailing]
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- Oh, fuck, yeah!
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00:07:15,978 --> 00:07:17,938
Pizza's here, dawg.
- Oh, fuck, yeah.
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00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:19,815
See, I told you, fuckin' haters.
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The plan's working.
We're getting that plane.
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00:07:21,817 --> 00:07:24,695
And then we're getting
our asses to Costa Rica.
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- Hey, help me with this shit.
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JULIO:
Yeah, yeah.
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- Hey, we got your pizza out here.
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Approved by a real-life New Yorker,
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so you know it's good.
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Come on out and get it.
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00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:37,374
Oh!
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♪
206
00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:06,737
- Hey, you jokers want your pizza or not?
207
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:10,032
- Julio, check the box.
Make sure they're not trying anything.
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00:08:10,032 --> 00:08:13,827
♪
209
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:14,828
- It's real pizza.
210
00:08:15,621 --> 00:08:17,372
- Alright, now where's my plane?
211
00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:19,333
- Plane?
212
00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:21,251
What plane?
213
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,504
- The fuck do you mean, "What plane?"
214
00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:25,214
I said I wanted a plane and a pizza.
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00:08:25,214 --> 00:08:26,840
♪
216
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:27,883
- Uh-oh!
217
00:08:27,883 --> 00:08:31,428
A plane and a pizza.
218
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:35,974
Stugotz, I thought you meant
you wanted a "plain pizza."
219
00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:37,768
You know, like with no toppings.
220
00:08:37,768 --> 00:08:40,562
So that's all I got you.
221
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:44,024
Plain... pizza.
222
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:45,776
- Are you fucking with me right now?
223
00:08:45,776 --> 00:08:47,903
SERGEANT:
No, no, no, honest mistake.
224
00:08:47,903 --> 00:08:49,863
Maybe it's the, uh, jet-lag
225
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:51,657
from when I took the red-eye here
226
00:08:51,657 --> 00:08:53,283
from the greatest city in the world,
227
00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:54,785
the Big Apple.
228
00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:58,872
- Hey, I want my fucking plane.
229
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,333
- Well, that's gonna take
a minute over here, right?
230
00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:03,502
I mean, what kinda plane do you want?
231
00:09:03,502 --> 00:09:06,713
You want like a big plane, small plane?
232
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:09,174
A fighter jet, like in Top Gun?
233
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,509
[screams]
234
00:09:10,509 --> 00:09:12,344
- Stop fucking with me!
235
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:13,262
[cocks rifle]
236
00:09:13,262 --> 00:09:14,721
♪
237
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,098
You either give me what I want,
238
00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:17,850
or I'll fucking kill everybody in here!
239
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:19,810
Stop testing me!
240
00:09:19,810 --> 00:09:22,729
I have nothing left to live for!
241
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,106
♪
242
00:09:24,106 --> 00:09:25,440
Get the fuck inside, Julio.
243
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,317
- Well... well, do you
still want the pizza?
244
00:09:27,317 --> 00:09:28,944
♪
245
00:09:28,944 --> 00:09:31,280
- No.
Dump it on that fuckin' cop's head.
246
00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:35,659
- Hey, just go ahead and do it.
247
00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:40,038
♪
248
00:09:40,998 --> 00:09:42,749
SERGEANT:
Ohh!
249
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,501
[officers laughing]
250
00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:46,003
[helicopter blades whirring]
251
00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:49,756
Good job, Rook.
252
00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:51,008
[chuckles]
253
00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:54,178
You know, you really made the best
out of a greasy situation.
254
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,514
- You're gonna get those people killed.
255
00:09:57,514 --> 00:09:58,473
SERGEANT:
You motherfucker.
256
00:09:58,473 --> 00:10:01,101
You are outta here!
257
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,312
You don't deserve OT.
258
00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:05,105
You're off the clock.
259
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:06,398
Now go home.
260
00:10:07,149 --> 00:10:08,817
♪
261
00:10:17,534 --> 00:10:21,872
♪
262
00:10:27,002 --> 00:10:28,587
- They're fuckin' with us, dawg.
263
00:10:28,587 --> 00:10:29,713
♪
264
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:32,174
[sighs] I'm afraid we're not
gonna get that plane, man.
265
00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:35,260
I mean, fuck, how could they even
get a plane down here anyway?
266
00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:36,970
- Dawg, remember a few years back
267
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,514
when they took the space shuttle
through the hood?
268
00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,432
- Oh, yeah, huh?
269
00:10:40,432 --> 00:10:42,226
Fuck, we shoulda asked for one of those.
270
00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:44,353
- A space shuttle?
271
00:10:44,353 --> 00:10:45,270
Nah, dawg.
272
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,397
We're going to Costa Rica, not Mars.
273
00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:49,691
LUIS: You know, my whole life
people have underestimated me
274
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:51,318
'cause I'm short.
275
00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:53,570
Even when I joined my old hood, you know,
276
00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,030
I wanted them to call me "Villain."
277
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:58,283
But they all just called me "Shorty."
278
00:10:59,660 --> 00:11:00,827
But for real though,
279
00:11:01,620 --> 00:11:03,497
all this adversity just made me stronger.
280
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:04,957
♪
281
00:11:04,957 --> 00:11:07,543
That's why I know
how to fight and fuck so good.
282
00:11:07,543 --> 00:11:09,169
♪
283
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:10,754
But never at the same time.
284
00:11:10,754 --> 00:11:12,589
- Trust me, we played it just right.
285
00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:13,757
Just stick to the plan.
286
00:11:13,757 --> 00:11:15,133
We're gonna get that plane.
287
00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:16,051
FARHAD:
Idiots.
288
00:11:17,636 --> 00:11:19,680
You think they're going
to bring an airplane
289
00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:21,348
to a bum in a liquor store?
290
00:11:21,849 --> 00:11:22,683
Really?
291
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:24,685
You are fucked, my friend.
292
00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:26,353
Your life is over.
293
00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:29,439
And you have only yourself
and that dumb shit Julio to blame.
294
00:11:30,816 --> 00:11:32,025
And you two.
295
00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:35,195
I've had to listen to you bicker all day.
296
00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:38,866
I am tired of this fucking city.
297
00:11:39,575 --> 00:11:43,245
Every day, people
come into my store disrespecting me
298
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:44,997
by calling me "Muhammad."
299
00:11:45,831 --> 00:11:48,333
My name is Farhad.
300
00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:49,918
Far-had!
301
00:11:51,170 --> 00:11:53,255
But I promise you all this,
302
00:11:53,964 --> 00:11:55,257
if I don't die today,
303
00:11:56,008 --> 00:11:58,719
I'm going to abandon this fucking store
304
00:11:58,719 --> 00:12:00,137
and move back to Iran.
305
00:12:01,555 --> 00:12:03,974
- Muhammad's right. I'm fucked.
306
00:12:05,726 --> 00:12:07,144
Why'd I ever listen to you?
307
00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:08,770
- Don't fuckin' listen to him.
308
00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,564
He's trying to pit us against each other.
309
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,482
Dawg, we're Clyde and Clyde.
310
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:15,110
Our ladies betrayed us,
but we're gonna get out of here together.
311
00:12:15,110 --> 00:12:16,236
- Man, shut up.
312
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:18,113
You broke up with Maggie six months ago.
313
00:12:18,614 --> 00:12:19,615
SONNY:
Wait, what?
314
00:12:20,115 --> 00:12:21,950
Hold on, you broke up with her?
LUIS: Yeah.
315
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:23,869
And believe me, it was for the best.
316
00:12:23,869 --> 00:12:25,954
- Shut up, Luis.
- Hold up, hold up.
317
00:12:25,954 --> 00:12:29,583
This whole fucking time,
I thought that we were in the same boat.
318
00:12:29,583 --> 00:12:31,210
That both of our ladies left us.
319
00:12:31,210 --> 00:12:33,045
But your Bonnie
isn't even a fuckin' Bonnie.
320
00:12:33,045 --> 00:12:34,880
- Don't fuckin' listen to him.
321
00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,007
You and me,
we're in the exact same situation.
322
00:12:37,007 --> 00:12:38,717
- Don't you fucking ever
323
00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:40,636
compare your life to mine.
324
00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:42,596
My ass is going back to prison.
325
00:12:42,596 --> 00:12:44,806
You still got shit to fuckin' live for.
326
00:12:46,141 --> 00:12:47,351
- If you say so.
327
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:48,936
- Oh, oh, you ain't got
nothing to live for anymore?
328
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:51,146
Cool, I'll just fuckin' end your shit now.
- No, no, no, no!
329
00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:52,981
SONNY: Oh, ohh.
JULIO: No, no, please.
330
00:12:52,981 --> 00:12:54,858
- Now you got something to live for, huh?
331
00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:55,901
Alright, what is it?
332
00:12:57,194 --> 00:12:59,029
- I don't know.
- Wrong answer, motherfucker.
333
00:12:59,029 --> 00:13:01,114
You got fuckin' five seconds.
- No.
334
00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:02,241
SONNY:
Gun to your head, playboy.
335
00:13:02,241 --> 00:13:05,577
What do you want to do with your life?
336
00:13:06,245 --> 00:13:07,371
- Coffee!
337
00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:08,956
- What about coffee?
338
00:13:08,956 --> 00:13:10,415
- Uh, I love it.
339
00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:11,333
SONNY:
What do you love about it?
340
00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,710
- It tastes good.
It-it's a great way to start your morning.
341
00:13:13,710 --> 00:13:16,213
- Okay. Ever think about
opening up your own café?
342
00:13:16,213 --> 00:13:19,383
- Uh, yeah,
I talked about it at, at-- once.
343
00:13:19,383 --> 00:13:21,260
- Then why didn't you do it?
- Dawg, I'm fuckin' broke.
344
00:13:21,260 --> 00:13:22,761
- Guess what, motherfucker?
345
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:24,555
I got a whole bag of money right there.
346
00:13:24,555 --> 00:13:27,182
Convince me to invest in your café.
347
00:13:27,182 --> 00:13:30,143
- Alright. Um, the coffee's gonna be like,
it's gonna be really good.
348
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,144
- Boom!
349
00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:33,272
There are a million
fucking good cups of coffee
350
00:13:33,272 --> 00:13:34,398
in this city, vato.
351
00:13:34,398 --> 00:13:35,566
A million!
352
00:13:35,566 --> 00:13:37,359
You need a fuckin' hook.
353
00:13:37,359 --> 00:13:38,235
Two seconds.
354
00:13:38,235 --> 00:13:39,611
- Oh. Oh, shit, you know what?
355
00:13:39,611 --> 00:13:40,988
I used to work with ex-felons.
356
00:13:40,988 --> 00:13:42,614
I-I can hire them.
357
00:13:43,574 --> 00:13:44,575
- Okay?
- Yeah.
358
00:13:44,575 --> 00:13:45,993
- Noble route.
- Mm-hmm.
359
00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:48,537
- You could market yourself as like
doing some shit for the community.
360
00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:49,288
- Yup.
361
00:13:49,288 --> 00:13:51,498
- Hey. I'm an ex-felon, and I need a jale.
362
00:13:52,165 --> 00:13:53,041
- Look at that.
363
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,918
You just hired
your first fuckin' employee.
364
00:13:54,918 --> 00:13:56,420
- Great, he's hired. He's hired.
365
00:13:56,420 --> 00:13:57,379
- Hey, hey.
366
00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:59,965
But he can't be my boss and shit.
We need to be like partners.
367
00:13:59,965 --> 00:14:01,842
Make him agree to that shit right now.
368
00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:03,719
- You cool with that?
369
00:14:04,261 --> 00:14:05,262
- Okay.
370
00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:07,222
- Fuck, yeah.
371
00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,559
Hey. Guess who's not unemployed anymore?
372
00:14:11,435 --> 00:14:12,436
- That's a start.
373
00:14:13,228 --> 00:14:14,354
SONNY:
Wow, look at that.
374
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,190
All you need now is a location.
JULIO: Mm-hm.
375
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:19,026
- This motherfucker says he wants
to give up his shop. Isn't that right?
376
00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:21,486
- Yeah, sure.
SONNY: So what do you say?
377
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:23,405
You gonna sell Julio your lease?
378
00:14:23,405 --> 00:14:24,281
- Whatever.
379
00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:26,825
- Congratu-fuck-alations, Julio. Boom!
380
00:14:27,701 --> 00:14:29,244
You have a reason to live.
381
00:14:29,244 --> 00:14:30,996
You're gonna open up
a fuckin' coffee shop.
382
00:14:30,996 --> 00:14:32,247
- Yeah, thank you.
383
00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,582
[panting]
384
00:14:33,582 --> 00:14:35,792
[helicopter blades whirring]
385
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,337
SONNY: [groans]
So, this
386
00:14:39,254 --> 00:14:40,714
oughta cover the lease.
387
00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:45,427
And this should get you
started on your café.
388
00:14:46,887 --> 00:14:48,013
- Thank you, Sonny.
389
00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:49,306
SONNY:
Hey.
390
00:14:50,432 --> 00:14:52,184
You better fuckin' write me
while I'm in prison.
391
00:14:52,184 --> 00:14:53,393
- Yeah, I'm gonna write you all the time.
392
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:55,229
LUIS:
That fool told me the same thing.
393
00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:57,397
Never wrote me shit.
394
00:14:59,191 --> 00:15:01,652
- Oh, shit.
Hey, it's Erika. Move, move, move.
395
00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:03,028
NEWSCASTER 1 [on TV]:
The car is coming to a halt.
396
00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,655
The police are surrounding them.
397
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:06,657
This adventure could be coming to an end.
398
00:15:06,657 --> 00:15:08,200
NEWSCASTER 2:
Oh, I'm not ready.
399
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,619
NEWSCASTER 1:
Bonnie and Clyde
have now exited the vehicle.
400
00:15:10,619 --> 00:15:12,162
They're fleeing on foot.
401
00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:13,622
SONNY:
Look at these fools.
402
00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:15,874
NEWSCASTER 2:
But, wait, they've stopped.
403
00:15:15,874 --> 00:15:17,584
NEWSCASTER 1: It looks like Clyde is...
NEWSCASTER 2: Oh.
404
00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:20,212
NEWSCASTER 1:
...getting down on one knee and--
405
00:15:20,212 --> 00:15:22,631
NEWSCASTER 2:
He's proposing!
406
00:15:22,631 --> 00:15:23,882
NEWSCASTER 1:
Wow.
407
00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:25,634
You can see that diamond
from the helicopter.
408
00:15:25,634 --> 00:15:27,511
Please say yes, Bonnie.
I need this.
409
00:15:27,511 --> 00:15:28,679
NEWSCASTER 2:
Oh! She said yes.
410
00:15:28,679 --> 00:15:30,013
She said yes!
411
00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:31,765
NEWSCASTER 1:
I think I might cry.
412
00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,392
In fact, I am crying.
413
00:15:33,392 --> 00:15:35,644
I haven't been able to cry
since my divorce.
414
00:15:35,644 --> 00:15:37,271
But now the floodgates are open.
415
00:15:37,271 --> 00:15:39,731
NEWSCASTER 2:
Wow, I've never seen
such a passionate kiss.
416
00:15:39,731 --> 00:15:41,692
That's a lot of tongue.
417
00:15:41,692 --> 00:15:42,317
[turns off TV]
418
00:15:43,694 --> 00:15:44,778
[Sonny sighs]
419
00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:46,655
♪
420
00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:47,573
- I see it now.
421
00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:49,783
I see how this all ends.
422
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:52,744
You're not opening that coffee shop.
423
00:15:52,744 --> 00:15:53,579
- What?
424
00:15:53,579 --> 00:15:55,539
- Just like I'm not going to Costa Rica.
425
00:15:56,665 --> 00:15:58,125
- This isn't a Hollywood movie
426
00:15:59,042 --> 00:16:01,628
where everyone's dreams
and ambitions come true.
427
00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:03,964
This is real life.
428
00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:06,675
And you know what?
429
00:16:06,675 --> 00:16:10,637
♪
430
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:11,722
I've had enough.
431
00:16:12,431 --> 00:16:13,765
We're going back to plan A.
432
00:16:15,601 --> 00:16:17,561
We're gonna go out there
and rush those fuckin' pigs.
433
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:20,647
- Look, dude, there's like
a hundred cops out there!
434
00:16:20,647 --> 00:16:21,648
- That's right.
435
00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:25,027
We're gonna get gunned down
and go out in a blaze of glory.
436
00:16:25,027 --> 00:16:25,861
JULIO:
What?
437
00:16:26,361 --> 00:16:29,156
- Clyde y Clyde.
438
00:16:29,156 --> 00:16:31,366
Never again will a woman
ever be able to hurt
439
00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:32,659
either one of us.
440
00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,119
- Come on, don't do it, dawg.
441
00:16:34,119 --> 00:16:36,163
Just turn yourself in, alright?
Prison's dope.
442
00:16:36,163 --> 00:16:37,289
They have all the Harry Potters.
443
00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:42,586
- ♪ Oh, say can you see ♪
444
00:16:42,586 --> 00:16:44,213
RUBY:
Luis, come here, come here.
445
00:16:44,213 --> 00:16:48,425
- ♪ By the dawn's early light ♪
446
00:16:48,425 --> 00:16:49,885
ROOKIE:
You got this.
447
00:16:49,885 --> 00:16:51,386
[Sonny singing indistinctly]
Let's go.
448
00:16:51,386 --> 00:16:52,596
Come on.
449
00:16:53,180 --> 00:16:54,264
Ooh, almost there.
450
00:16:54,264 --> 00:16:55,807
SONNY:
♪ At the twilight's... ♪
451
00:16:55,807 --> 00:16:57,142
- Ah, shit.
452
00:16:57,142 --> 00:16:58,227
[singing continues]
Okay.
453
00:16:59,186 --> 00:17:03,273
SONNY:
♪ Whose broad stripes and bright stars ♪
454
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:05,108
- Oh, shit.
455
00:17:05,108 --> 00:17:06,527
Safety. Yeah.
[gun clicks]
456
00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:08,195
[singing continues]
457
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:09,821
♪
458
00:17:09,821 --> 00:17:10,322
[metal clangs]
459
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,867
[screaming]
460
00:17:13,867 --> 00:17:16,954
♪
461
00:17:16,954 --> 00:17:18,747
[gun clicks]
[Farhad groaning]
462
00:17:18,747 --> 00:17:21,875
♪
463
00:17:24,211 --> 00:17:26,296
- [in slow motion] Bite him!
464
00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:30,175
♪
465
00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:37,516
[yells]
466
00:17:37,516 --> 00:17:39,268
[gun thuds]
JULIO: Get the--
467
00:17:39,268 --> 00:17:41,186
- Ah, you fuckin' bit me!
468
00:17:41,186 --> 00:17:43,105
- Payback, bitch! [laughs]
469
00:17:43,105 --> 00:17:44,815
Never underestimate short fools.
470
00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:46,942
See, I told you I could take him.
471
00:17:47,693 --> 00:17:48,735
- Chill out.
472
00:17:49,278 --> 00:17:51,989
ROOKIE: Hey. [panting]
[Farhad groaning]
473
00:17:51,989 --> 00:17:52,823
You okay?
474
00:17:52,823 --> 00:17:54,283
♪
475
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:56,368
- Are you fucking kidding me?
476
00:17:56,952 --> 00:17:58,996
I was shot by a cop in America.
477
00:17:59,496 --> 00:18:02,624
I am going to sue you
for millions of dollars.
478
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:05,794
Today is the best day of my life.
479
00:18:05,794 --> 00:18:07,171
[cries]
480
00:18:07,171 --> 00:18:08,922
♪ I Love L.A. by Randy Newman playing ♪
481
00:18:08,922 --> 00:18:09,840
[grunts]
482
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:12,301
♪
483
00:18:15,429 --> 00:18:17,055
- ♪ Look at that mountain ♪
484
00:18:17,055 --> 00:18:18,348
♪ Look at those trees ♪
485
00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:19,099
[Farhad groans]
486
00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:21,059
♪ Look at that bum over there, man ♪
487
00:18:21,059 --> 00:18:21,810
♪ He's down on his knees ♪
488
00:18:21,810 --> 00:18:23,395
- I'm gonna fuckin' kill you, Julio.
489
00:18:23,395 --> 00:18:25,105
I'm gonna fuckin' kill you.
490
00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:27,816
- Estás bien?
- Estoy bien, estoy bien.
491
00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:29,735
[speaking Spanish]
492
00:18:29,735 --> 00:18:32,738
♪
493
00:18:32,738 --> 00:18:35,073
- You cost us a lot of overtime today.
494
00:18:35,073 --> 00:18:37,576
Better watch your back, Serpico.
495
00:18:37,576 --> 00:18:39,411
♪
496
00:18:39,411 --> 00:18:40,954
[officers chuckle]
497
00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:42,789
- ♪ Century Boulevard ♪
498
00:18:43,790 --> 00:18:44,583
- ♪ We love it ♪
499
00:18:45,459 --> 00:18:46,418
- ♪ Victory Boulevard ♪
500
00:18:47,419 --> 00:18:48,253
- ♪ We love it ♪
501
00:18:48,670 --> 00:18:50,172
- ♪ Santa Monica Boulevard ♪
502
00:18:51,006 --> 00:18:52,174
- ♪ We love it ♪
503
00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:53,634
- ♪ Sixth Street ♪
504
00:18:53,634 --> 00:18:56,470
- ♪ We love it, we love it, we love it ♪
505
00:18:56,470 --> 00:18:58,013
♪
506
00:18:58,013 --> 00:18:59,515
- ♪ We love LA ♪
507
00:18:59,515 --> 00:19:03,936
♪
508
00:19:03,936 --> 00:19:05,479
[tires screech]
509
00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:08,649
- Well, dawg, we fuckin' did it.
510
00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:11,318
- Did what?
511
00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:13,320
You almost got us killed,
you fuckin' idiot.
512
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:14,446
- What the fuck are you talking about?
513
00:19:14,446 --> 00:19:16,073
I had that shit under control
the whole time.
514
00:19:16,073 --> 00:19:18,116
- No, you fuckin' didn't.
515
00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:19,034
- Oh, I'm sorry.
516
00:19:19,034 --> 00:19:21,078
Did you get us 100K to start a business?
517
00:19:21,078 --> 00:19:22,120
That's what I thought.
518
00:19:24,122 --> 00:19:25,332
Look at all this money.
519
00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:27,292
Oh, what's this?
[device beeps, poofs]
520
00:19:27,292 --> 00:19:28,710
- Ooh, shit.
521
00:19:28,710 --> 00:19:30,128
- [coughing] The fuck?
522
00:19:30,128 --> 00:19:31,880
RUBY:
What the fuck?
523
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,591
JULIO: Well, looks like
we at least still have 50K.
524
00:19:34,591 --> 00:19:37,094
♪ Bad Boys Reply by Inner Circle playing ♪
525
00:19:37,094 --> 00:19:38,262
♪
526
00:19:38,262 --> 00:19:40,013
LUIS:
The wipers are on the outside, stupid.
527
00:19:40,013 --> 00:19:41,014
JULIO: I know, stupid.
528
00:19:41,014 --> 00:19:42,724
RUBY:
Then why'd you turn them on, stupid?
529
00:19:42,724 --> 00:19:44,893
JULIO: Instinct, stupid.
We almost fucking died,
530
00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:47,020
and you wanna give me shit
about windshield wipers?
531
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,856
- ♪ Bad boys, bad boys ♪
532
00:19:48,856 --> 00:19:50,190
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
533
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:52,609
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
534
00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:54,278
♪ Bad boys, bad boys ♪
535
00:19:54,278 --> 00:19:55,654
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
536
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:58,240
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
537
00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:00,993
♪ When you were eight
and you had bad traits ♪
538
00:20:00,993 --> 00:20:03,704
♪ You go to school
and learn the golden rule ♪
539
00:20:03,704 --> 00:20:06,498
♪ So why are you
acting like a bloody fool? ♪
540
00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:07,708
♪ If you get hot ♪
541
00:20:07,708 --> 00:20:09,084
♪ Then you must get cool ♪
542
00:20:09,084 --> 00:20:10,794
♪ Bad boy boys, bad boys ♪
543
00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:12,171
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
544
00:20:12,171 --> 00:20:14,506
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
545
00:20:14,506 --> 00:20:16,258
♪ Bad boys, bad boys ♪
546
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:17,634
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
547
00:20:17,634 --> 00:20:20,220
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
548
00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:21,597
♪ You chuck it on that one ♪
549
00:20:21,597 --> 00:20:23,015
♪ You chuck it on this one ♪
550
00:20:23,015 --> 00:20:24,224
♪ You chuck it on your mother ♪
551
00:20:24,224 --> 00:20:25,767
♪ And you chuck it on your father ♪
552
00:20:25,767 --> 00:20:26,977
♪ You chuck it on your brother ♪
553
00:20:26,977 --> 00:20:28,437
♪ And you chuck it on your sister ♪
554
00:20:28,437 --> 00:20:29,646
♪ You chuck it on that one ♪
555
00:20:29,646 --> 00:20:31,064
♪ And you chuck it on me ♪
556
00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:32,733
♪ Bad boys, bad boys ♪
557
00:20:32,733 --> 00:20:33,942
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
558
00:20:33,942 --> 00:20:36,486
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
559
00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:38,071
♪ Bad boys, bad boys ♪
560
00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:39,406
♪ Whatcha gonna do ♪
561
00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:41,992
♪ Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ♪
562
00:20:41,992 --> 00:20:43,619
♪ Bad boys, bad boys... ♪
36833
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