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1
00:00:01,043 --> 00:00:03,213
? dramatic techno music playing ?
2
00:00:03,213 --> 00:00:05,298
?
3
00:00:05,298 --> 00:00:06,883
JULIO:
It's Ruby! She's the one texting us!
4
00:00:06,883 --> 00:00:08,343
SONNY:
Everyone on the fucking ground!
5
00:00:08,343 --> 00:00:09,719
LUIS:
I can be your hero, baby.
6
00:00:10,303 --> 00:00:11,680
JULIO:
Ask for a plane.
7
00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:12,722
LUIS:
I'm not that little, homey!
8
00:00:12,722 --> 00:00:13,640
JULIO:
Shut up, bitch.
9
00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:16,476
SERGEANT:
New York City, the Big Apple!
10
00:00:17,143 --> 00:00:19,062
JULIO:
Sonny, behind you. The gun.
11
00:00:19,062 --> 00:00:21,064
?
12
00:00:23,316 --> 00:00:24,234
?
13
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- You should be ashamed of yourselves.
14
00:00:25,694 --> 00:00:27,779
Playing with our emotions like that.
15
00:00:27,779 --> 00:00:29,573
You know what?
When the pizza comes,
16
00:00:29,573 --> 00:00:30,824
me and Sonny are gonna eat it all.
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00:00:30,824 --> 00:00:32,199
No pizza for you.
18
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FARHAD: You're never going
to get a pizza or plane.
19
00:00:34,494 --> 00:00:36,496
You're going to die on an empty stomach.
20
00:00:36,496 --> 00:00:38,790
- Shut the fuck up.
21
00:00:39,249 --> 00:00:40,292
And you.
22
00:00:40,917 --> 00:00:42,794
How the fuck did you do
that shit with our phones?
23
00:00:42,794 --> 00:00:45,255
- I saw you fuckin' idiots
whining about your exes,
24
00:00:45,255 --> 00:00:46,423
so I went into your contacts
25
00:00:46,423 --> 00:00:47,924
and changed their numbers to my number,
26
00:00:47,924 --> 00:00:50,010
and texted you
a bunch of fake-ass bullshit.
27
00:00:50,010 --> 00:00:51,344
- How'd you know our passwords?
28
00:00:51,344 --> 00:00:53,096
- Every dude's password is the same.
29
00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:54,389
Zero, zero, zero, zero.
30
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[sirens wailing in distance]
31
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- Fuck.
32
00:00:59,728 --> 00:01:01,313
Well, for the record,
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00:01:01,855 --> 00:01:03,189
I do have a big-ass dick.
34
00:01:03,648 --> 00:01:05,859
- Yeah, me, too.
That's why I fell for it.
35
00:01:05,859 --> 00:01:07,944
- If you guys really had big dicks,
36
00:01:07,944 --> 00:01:10,280
your women wouldn't have
left you for better men.
37
00:01:10,780 --> 00:01:11,823
- So you wanna see it, huh?
38
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Is that what it's gonna take
to prove it to you? Alright.
39
00:01:13,992 --> 00:01:16,369
- Dawg, don't take your dick out.
40
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You don't need his approval.
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We know what we got.
42
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SONNY:
Yeah, you're right.
43
00:01:20,707 --> 00:01:23,627
Hey, let's block the fuckin' doors
so these assholes don't try to escape.
44
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- Oh, my God. Men who think
they have big dicks are ruining the world.
45
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- Wait, so,
46
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you think I'm ruining the world?
47
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- No.
48
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- Oh, so now I have a small dick?
49
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- Luis, goddamn.
50
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? theme music playing ?
51
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?
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?
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? dramatic music plays on TV ?
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NEWSCASTER 1 [on TV]:
As the chase continues into the night,
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the authorities have been able to identify
56
00:02:00,121 --> 00:02:03,875
the alleged bank robbers
as Erika Sanchez and Ernie Alvarez.
57
00:02:03,875 --> 00:02:06,044
NEWSCASTER 2 [on TV]:
But who gives a hoot about their real names?
58
00:02:06,044 --> 00:02:07,671
We're calling this couple...
59
00:02:07,671 --> 00:02:09,047
NEWSCASTERS:
Bonnie and Clyde.
60
00:02:09,047 --> 00:02:10,549
NEWSCASTER 1:
Move over, Romeo and Juliet.
61
00:02:10,549 --> 00:02:12,425
There's new star-crossed lovers in town.
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[phone buzzing]
NEWSCASTER 2: People are on the side
63
00:02:14,052 --> 00:02:15,220
of the highway with signs...
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- Hello?
ESPERANZA [over phone]: Julio.
65
00:02:23,228 --> 00:02:24,271
Uh...
66
00:02:26,481 --> 00:02:28,858
Hey, how do you guys
say "hostage" in Spanish?
67
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- I don't fuckin' know.
68
00:02:31,152 --> 00:02:32,112
- I don't know.
69
00:02:33,071 --> 00:02:33,989
- Uh...
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[Julio speaking Spanish]
71
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[helicopter blades whirring]
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[continues speaking Spanish]
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- Ouch, hey.
Get the fuck off me.
74
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LUIS:
Fuck, I can't, dawg.
75
00:02:51,131 --> 00:02:52,674
Just give me a second, alright?
76
00:02:52,674 --> 00:02:53,967
I need to talk to her.
77
00:02:55,385 --> 00:02:56,720
Hey. [whistles]
78
00:02:56,720 --> 00:02:57,679
Ruby?
79
00:02:58,471 --> 00:02:59,931
I was just thinking how, like,
80
00:03:00,891 --> 00:03:03,643
this whole situation
is pretty traumatic, huh?
81
00:03:04,394 --> 00:03:05,604
- Uh-huh.
82
00:03:05,604 --> 00:03:07,230
LUIS:
So, you know they say that
83
00:03:07,230 --> 00:03:08,690
traumatic situations like this,
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00:03:08,690 --> 00:03:10,901
they bring people
closer together and shit.
85
00:03:11,401 --> 00:03:13,153
So, this whole thing's kinda
86
00:03:13,778 --> 00:03:15,906
taking our relationship to the next level,
87
00:03:15,906 --> 00:03:17,824
whether either of us like it or not.
88
00:03:17,824 --> 00:03:19,034
But for the record,
89
00:03:20,410 --> 00:03:21,286
I kinda like it.
90
00:03:21,286 --> 00:03:23,663
- Can you just please fuckin' drop it?
91
00:03:23,663 --> 00:03:26,166
I'm not in the mood to talk
about this shit with you right now.
92
00:03:26,166 --> 00:03:27,918
- Well, I am in the mood
to talk about it right now.
93
00:03:28,710 --> 00:03:29,878
Why don't you wanna be my lady?
94
00:03:29,878 --> 00:03:31,922
- Alright, you wanna talk about it?
Let's talk about it.
95
00:03:31,922 --> 00:03:33,632
One, you ain't got a job.
96
00:03:33,632 --> 00:03:35,175
That's a problem for me.
97
00:03:35,175 --> 00:03:37,427
My ex-husband didn't work,
and it fucked us up.
98
00:03:37,427 --> 00:03:40,305
And two, and I know this sounds messed up,
99
00:03:40,305 --> 00:03:42,390
but when you weren't able
to take Sonny down,
100
00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:44,184
it was kind of a turnoff for me.
101
00:03:45,101 --> 00:03:47,312
- Are you fuckin' serious?
102
00:03:47,312 --> 00:03:49,231
You're coming at me like that right now?
103
00:03:49,689 --> 00:03:50,857
Well, fuck you then.
104
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[scoffs]
105
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FARHAD: Get off of me.
[Luis groans]
106
00:03:55,987 --> 00:03:56,863
- Fuck.
107
00:04:00,825 --> 00:04:01,660
- Hello?
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00:04:04,579 --> 00:04:05,455
[rattles]
109
00:04:05,455 --> 00:04:06,373
SONNY:
That's it.
110
00:04:07,874 --> 00:04:09,584
I can't hold it anymore, dawg.
111
00:04:09,584 --> 00:04:11,169
I gotta take a fuckin' piss.
112
00:04:11,169 --> 00:04:11,962
JULIO:
Oh, it's cool.
113
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I'll look after the hostages
while you take a leak.
114
00:04:14,089 --> 00:04:15,423
Uh, just give me one of the guns.
115
00:04:15,423 --> 00:04:18,009
- [chuckles] Yeah, I mean, I trust you,
116
00:04:18,009 --> 00:04:20,011
but not that much.
117
00:04:21,263 --> 00:04:22,639
Oh, come on, big dawg.
118
00:04:24,015 --> 00:04:25,350
We're here already, at the toilet.
119
00:04:25,350 --> 00:04:26,768
Let's do some work.
120
00:04:27,477 --> 00:04:29,145
Do your thing, come on.
121
00:04:29,145 --> 00:04:30,689
[sighs] Please.
122
00:04:31,856 --> 00:04:33,984
- [whispering] Look, hey, I'm sorry.
123
00:04:33,984 --> 00:04:35,569
I shouldn't have said that shit earlier.
124
00:04:36,194 --> 00:04:39,447
- Well, you know what? Just to clarify,
he didn't beat my ass, alright?
125
00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:41,866
Doesn't even matter anyway
'cause we're broken up now.
126
00:04:41,866 --> 00:04:44,160
Now you're just some random hyna
I'm in a hostage situation with.
127
00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:47,289
- Oh, yeah, well, we can't break up
if we were never together, stupid ass.
128
00:04:47,289 --> 00:04:48,957
- Goddammit, both of you shut the fuck up.
129
00:04:49,749 --> 00:04:51,167
Can't even fuckin' concentrate.
130
00:04:53,295 --> 00:04:54,337
[sighs]
131
00:04:55,213 --> 00:04:56,506
Fuck, now it's too quiet.
132
00:04:57,299 --> 00:04:59,259
It's like everybody's sitting around
waiting for me to go or something.
133
00:04:59,259 --> 00:05:00,635
[Ruby sighs]
It's making me nervous.
134
00:05:01,303 --> 00:05:03,138
Like, hum a song or some shit.
135
00:05:03,138 --> 00:05:04,472
- What song?
136
00:05:04,472 --> 00:05:06,349
- I don't give fuck, anything.
137
00:05:08,685 --> 00:05:10,061
Start singing!
138
00:05:10,061 --> 00:05:11,271
Or I'm gonna fuckin' shoot somebody.
139
00:05:13,356 --> 00:05:16,401
- ? Oh, say can you see ?
140
00:05:16,401 --> 00:05:18,570
SONNY:
Everybody, everybody. Everybody sing.
141
00:05:18,570 --> 00:05:21,990
[all singing]
? By the dawn's early light ?
142
00:05:21,990 --> 00:05:23,575
SONNY:
Oh, here we go.
143
00:05:23,575 --> 00:05:25,493
- ? What so proudly... ?
[grunting]
144
00:05:25,493 --> 00:05:26,995
- Oh, ho, ho, ho!
[urinating]
145
00:05:26,995 --> 00:05:28,288
Oh, gah, thank God.
146
00:05:28,288 --> 00:05:31,666
- ? And we're inside the bathroom ?
147
00:05:31,666 --> 00:05:32,834
- ? An American ?
148
00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:36,296
- ? Come and rescue us, please ?
149
00:05:36,296 --> 00:05:36,922
? vocalizes ?
150
00:05:36,922 --> 00:05:38,715
LUIS:
? To celebrate, we sing ?
151
00:05:38,715 --> 00:05:40,467
? all singing off-key ?
152
00:05:40,467 --> 00:05:42,177
- Oh, my God.
153
00:05:42,177 --> 00:05:43,220
Thank you.
154
00:05:45,222 --> 00:05:46,348
[siren wails]
155
00:05:46,348 --> 00:05:47,974
? upbeat whimsical music playing ?
156
00:05:47,974 --> 00:05:52,562
?
157
00:06:00,111 --> 00:06:02,572
[helicopter blades whirring]
158
00:06:02,572 --> 00:06:03,865
- Thirty minutes on the dot.
159
00:06:03,865 --> 00:06:05,659
Look at you guys.
160
00:06:05,659 --> 00:06:06,910
[chuckles] Thank you, sweetheart.
161
00:06:06,910 --> 00:06:08,078
Hey, Rookie.
162
00:06:08,078 --> 00:06:09,704
Tip the nice delivery person.
163
00:06:10,664 --> 00:06:12,499
And don't be cheap.
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ROOKIE:
Here you go, um...
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Just take it all. Thank you.
166
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SERGEANT:
Alright.
167
00:06:16,670 --> 00:06:18,421
Dig in, everybody.
168
00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:20,632
- Hey, hey, hey, what the hell?
Those are for the hostages.
169
00:06:21,049 --> 00:06:24,302
- Let us worry about the pizza, Rook.
170
00:06:24,886 --> 00:06:27,222
- What if it was
your son or daughter in there?
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? melancholic music playing ?
172
00:06:28,181 --> 00:06:30,350
Would you still be
stuffing your faces with pizza?
173
00:06:31,142 --> 00:06:34,145
It's our job to serve and protect
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00:06:34,145 --> 00:06:35,355
the people of this city.
175
00:06:35,355 --> 00:06:37,482
?
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00:06:37,482 --> 00:06:38,650
[indistinct radio chatter]
177
00:06:38,650 --> 00:06:39,943
SERGEANT:
Wow.
178
00:06:39,943 --> 00:06:42,612
You know, sometimes
it's the young guys on the force
179
00:06:43,405 --> 00:06:46,658
who remind us old farts
what we're doing all this for.
180
00:06:47,576 --> 00:06:49,160
You're absolutely right.
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00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:50,161
They wanted pizza.
182
00:06:50,870 --> 00:06:52,706
So we're gonna give 'em pizza.
183
00:06:52,706 --> 00:06:53,498
Right?
184
00:06:53,498 --> 00:06:54,749
? uplifting patriotic music playing ?
185
00:06:54,749 --> 00:06:57,794
And I know the perfect guy to deliver it.
186
00:06:58,461 --> 00:07:00,964
Uh-oh. [laughs]
187
00:07:00,964 --> 00:07:02,132
Wink.
188
00:07:02,507 --> 00:07:03,508
It's you.
189
00:07:04,593 --> 00:07:06,094
Come on, don't be afraid.
190
00:07:06,094 --> 00:07:08,221
If you don't get shot,
maybe he'll tip you.
191
00:07:09,014 --> 00:07:11,433
He's got a lot of money. Robbed a bank.
192
00:07:11,433 --> 00:07:13,852
[siren wailing]
193
00:07:13,852 --> 00:07:15,562
- Oh, fuck, yeah!
194
00:07:16,021 --> 00:07:17,981
Pizza's here, dawg.
- Oh, fuck, yeah.
195
00:07:17,981 --> 00:07:19,858
See, I told you, fuckin' haters.
196
00:07:19,858 --> 00:07:21,860
The plan's working.
We're getting that plane.
197
00:07:21,860 --> 00:07:24,738
And then we're getting
our asses to Costa Rica.
198
00:07:24,738 --> 00:07:25,697
- Hey, help me with this shit.
199
00:07:25,697 --> 00:07:26,615
JULIO:
Yeah, yeah.
200
00:07:26,615 --> 00:07:29,826
- Hey, we got your pizza out here.
201
00:07:29,826 --> 00:07:32,787
Approved by a real-life New Yorker,
202
00:07:32,787 --> 00:07:33,914
so you know it's good.
203
00:07:34,581 --> 00:07:36,374
Come on out and get it.
204
00:07:36,374 --> 00:07:37,417
Oh!
205
00:07:37,417 --> 00:07:39,628
?
206
00:08:03,318 --> 00:08:06,780
- Hey, you jokers want your pizza or not?
207
00:08:07,864 --> 00:08:10,075
- Julio, check the box.
Make sure they're not trying anything.
208
00:08:10,075 --> 00:08:13,870
?
209
00:08:13,870 --> 00:08:14,871
- It's real pizza.
210
00:08:15,664 --> 00:08:17,415
- Alright, now where's my plane?
211
00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:19,376
- Plane?
212
00:08:20,168 --> 00:08:21,294
What plane?
213
00:08:21,878 --> 00:08:23,547
- The fuck do you mean, "What plane?"
214
00:08:23,547 --> 00:08:25,257
I said I wanted a plane and a pizza.
215
00:08:25,257 --> 00:08:26,883
?
216
00:08:26,883 --> 00:08:27,926
- Uh-oh!
217
00:08:27,926 --> 00:08:31,471
A plane and a pizza.
218
00:08:31,471 --> 00:08:36,017
Stugotz, I thought you meant
you wanted a "plain pizza."
219
00:08:36,017 --> 00:08:37,811
You know, like with no toppings.
220
00:08:37,811 --> 00:08:40,605
So that's all I got you.
221
00:08:40,605 --> 00:08:44,067
Plain... pizza.
222
00:08:44,067 --> 00:08:45,819
- Are you fucking with me right now?
223
00:08:45,819 --> 00:08:47,946
SERGEANT:
No, no, no, honest mistake.
224
00:08:47,946 --> 00:08:49,906
Maybe it's the, uh, jet-lag
225
00:08:49,906 --> 00:08:51,700
from when I took the red-eye here
226
00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:53,326
from the greatest city in the world,
227
00:08:53,326 --> 00:08:54,828
the Big Apple.
228
00:08:55,495 --> 00:08:58,915
- Hey, I want my fucking plane.
229
00:08:58,915 --> 00:09:01,376
- Well, that's gonna take
a minute over here, right?
230
00:09:01,376 --> 00:09:03,545
I mean, what kinda plane do you want?
231
00:09:03,545 --> 00:09:06,756
You want like a big plane, small plane?
232
00:09:06,756 --> 00:09:09,217
A fighter jet, like in Top Gun?
233
00:09:09,217 --> 00:09:10,552
[screams]
234
00:09:10,552 --> 00:09:12,387
- Stop fucking with me!
235
00:09:12,387 --> 00:09:13,305
[cocks rifle]
236
00:09:13,305 --> 00:09:14,764
?
237
00:09:14,764 --> 00:09:16,141
You either give me what I want,
238
00:09:16,141 --> 00:09:17,893
or I'll fucking kill everybody in here!
239
00:09:18,643 --> 00:09:19,853
Stop testing me!
240
00:09:19,853 --> 00:09:22,772
I have nothing left to live for!
241
00:09:22,772 --> 00:09:24,149
?
242
00:09:24,149 --> 00:09:25,483
Get the fuck inside, Julio.
243
00:09:25,483 --> 00:09:27,360
- Well... well, do you
still want the pizza?
244
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:28,987
?
245
00:09:28,987 --> 00:09:31,323
- No.
Dump it on that fuckin' cop's head.
246
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,702
- Hey, just go ahead and do it.
247
00:09:37,329 --> 00:09:40,081
?
248
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:42,792
SERGEANT:
Ohh!
249
00:09:42,792 --> 00:09:44,544
[officers laughing]
250
00:09:44,544 --> 00:09:46,046
[helicopter blades whirring]
251
00:09:47,714 --> 00:09:49,799
Good job, Rook.
252
00:09:49,799 --> 00:09:51,051
[chuckles]
253
00:09:51,051 --> 00:09:54,221
You know, you really made the best
out of a greasy situation.
254
00:09:56,139 --> 00:09:57,557
- You're gonna get those people killed.
255
00:09:57,557 --> 00:09:58,516
SERGEANT:
You motherfucker.
256
00:09:58,516 --> 00:10:01,144
You are outta here!
257
00:10:01,144 --> 00:10:03,355
You don't deserve OT.
258
00:10:03,355 --> 00:10:05,148
You're off the clock.
259
00:10:05,148 --> 00:10:06,441
Now go home.
260
00:10:07,192 --> 00:10:08,860
?
261
00:10:17,577 --> 00:10:21,915
?
262
00:10:27,045 --> 00:10:28,630
- They're fuckin' with us, dawg.
263
00:10:28,630 --> 00:10:29,756
?
264
00:10:29,756 --> 00:10:32,217
[sighs] I'm afraid we're not
gonna get that plane, man.
265
00:10:32,717 --> 00:10:35,303
I mean, fuck, how could they even
get a plane down here anyway?
266
00:10:35,303 --> 00:10:37,013
- Dawg, remember a few years back
267
00:10:37,013 --> 00:10:38,557
when they took the space shuttle
through the hood?
268
00:10:39,307 --> 00:10:40,475
- Oh, yeah, huh?
269
00:10:40,475 --> 00:10:42,269
Fuck, we shoulda asked for one of those.
270
00:10:42,811 --> 00:10:44,396
- A space shuttle?
271
00:10:44,396 --> 00:10:45,313
Nah, dawg.
272
00:10:45,313 --> 00:10:47,440
We're going to Costa Rica, not Mars.
273
00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,734
LUIS: You know, my whole life
people have underestimated me
274
00:10:49,734 --> 00:10:51,361
'cause I'm short.
275
00:10:51,361 --> 00:10:53,613
Even when I joined my old hood, you know,
276
00:10:53,613 --> 00:10:55,073
I wanted them to call me "Villain."
277
00:10:56,032 --> 00:10:58,326
But they all just called me "Shorty."
278
00:10:59,703 --> 00:11:00,870
But for real though,
279
00:11:01,663 --> 00:11:03,540
all this adversity just made me stronger.
280
00:11:03,540 --> 00:11:05,000
?
281
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,586
That's why I know
how to fight and fuck so good.
282
00:11:07,586 --> 00:11:09,212
?
283
00:11:09,212 --> 00:11:10,797
But never at the same time.
284
00:11:10,797 --> 00:11:12,632
- Trust me, we played it just right.
285
00:11:12,632 --> 00:11:13,800
Just stick to the plan.
286
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:15,176
We're gonna get that plane.
287
00:11:15,176 --> 00:11:16,094
FARHAD:
Idiots.
288
00:11:17,679 --> 00:11:19,723
You think they're going
to bring an airplane
289
00:11:19,723 --> 00:11:21,391
to a bum in a liquor store?
290
00:11:21,892 --> 00:11:22,726
Really?
291
00:11:22,726 --> 00:11:24,728
You are fucked, my friend.
292
00:11:24,728 --> 00:11:26,396
Your life is over.
293
00:11:26,897 --> 00:11:29,482
And you have only yourself
and that dumb shit Julio to blame.
294
00:11:30,859 --> 00:11:32,068
And you two.
295
00:11:32,068 --> 00:11:35,238
I've had to listen to you bicker all day.
296
00:11:36,197 --> 00:11:38,909
I am tired of this fucking city.
297
00:11:39,618 --> 00:11:43,288
Every day, people
come into my store disrespecting me
298
00:11:43,288 --> 00:11:45,040
by calling me "Muhammad."
299
00:11:45,874 --> 00:11:48,376
My name is Farhad.
300
00:11:48,376 --> 00:11:49,961
Far-had!
301
00:11:51,213 --> 00:11:53,298
But I promise you all this,
302
00:11:54,007 --> 00:11:55,300
if I don't die today,
303
00:11:56,051 --> 00:11:58,762
I'm going to abandon this fucking store
304
00:11:58,762 --> 00:12:00,180
and move back to Iran.
305
00:12:01,598 --> 00:12:04,017
- Muhammad's right. I'm fucked.
306
00:12:05,769 --> 00:12:07,187
Why'd I ever listen to you?
307
00:12:07,729 --> 00:12:08,813
- Don't fuckin' listen to him.
308
00:12:08,813 --> 00:12:10,607
He's trying to pit us against each other.
309
00:12:10,607 --> 00:12:12,525
Dawg, we're Clyde and Clyde.
310
00:12:12,525 --> 00:12:15,153
Our ladies betrayed us,
but we're gonna get out of here together.
311
00:12:15,153 --> 00:12:16,279
- Man, shut up.
312
00:12:16,279 --> 00:12:18,156
You broke up with Maggie six months ago.
313
00:12:18,657 --> 00:12:19,658
SONNY:
Wait, what?
314
00:12:20,158 --> 00:12:21,993
Hold on, you broke up with her?
LUIS: Yeah.
315
00:12:21,993 --> 00:12:23,912
And believe me, it was for the best.
316
00:12:23,912 --> 00:12:25,997
- Shut up, Luis.
- Hold up, hold up.
317
00:12:25,997 --> 00:12:29,626
This whole fucking time,
I thought that we were in the same boat.
318
00:12:29,626 --> 00:12:31,253
That both of our ladies left us.
319
00:12:31,253 --> 00:12:33,088
But your Bonnie
isn't even a fuckin' Bonnie.
320
00:12:33,088 --> 00:12:34,923
- Don't fuckin' listen to him.
321
00:12:34,923 --> 00:12:37,050
You and me,
we're in the exact same situation.
322
00:12:37,050 --> 00:12:38,760
- Don't you fucking ever
323
00:12:39,386 --> 00:12:40,679
compare your life to mine.
324
00:12:41,179 --> 00:12:42,639
My ass is going back to prison.
325
00:12:42,639 --> 00:12:44,849
You still got shit to fuckin' live for.
326
00:12:46,184 --> 00:12:47,394
- If you say so.
327
00:12:47,394 --> 00:12:48,979
- Oh, oh, you ain't got
nothing to live for anymore?
328
00:12:48,979 --> 00:12:51,189
Cool, I'll just fuckin' end your shit now.
- No, no, no, no!
329
00:12:51,189 --> 00:12:53,024
SONNY: Oh, ohh.
JULIO: No, no, please.
330
00:12:53,024 --> 00:12:54,901
- Now you got something to live for, huh?
331
00:12:54,901 --> 00:12:55,944
Alright, what is it?
332
00:12:57,237 --> 00:12:59,072
- I don't know.
- Wrong answer, motherfucker.
333
00:12:59,072 --> 00:13:01,157
You got fuckin' five seconds.
- No.
334
00:13:01,157 --> 00:13:02,284
SONNY:
Gun to your head, playboy.
335
00:13:02,284 --> 00:13:05,620
What do you want to do with your life?
336
00:13:06,288 --> 00:13:07,414
- Coffee!
337
00:13:08,039 --> 00:13:08,999
- What about coffee?
338
00:13:08,999 --> 00:13:10,458
- Uh, I love it.
339
00:13:10,458 --> 00:13:11,376
SONNY:
What do you love about it?
340
00:13:11,376 --> 00:13:13,753
- It tastes good.
It-it's a great way to start your morning.
341
00:13:13,753 --> 00:13:16,256
- Okay. Ever think about
opening up your own caf�?
342
00:13:16,256 --> 00:13:19,426
- Uh, yeah,
I talked about it at, at... once.
343
00:13:19,426 --> 00:13:21,303
- Then why didn't you do it?
- Dawg, I'm fuckin' broke.
344
00:13:21,303 --> 00:13:22,804
- Guess what, motherfucker?
345
00:13:22,804 --> 00:13:24,598
I got a whole bag of money right there.
346
00:13:24,598 --> 00:13:27,225
Convince me to invest in your caf�.
347
00:13:27,225 --> 00:13:30,186
- Alright. Um, the coffee's gonna be like,
it's gonna be really good.
348
00:13:30,186 --> 00:13:31,187
- Boom!
349
00:13:31,187 --> 00:13:33,315
There are a million
fucking good cups of coffee
350
00:13:33,315 --> 00:13:34,441
in this city, vato.
351
00:13:34,441 --> 00:13:35,609
A million!
352
00:13:35,609 --> 00:13:37,402
You need a fuckin' hook.
353
00:13:37,402 --> 00:13:38,278
Two seconds.
354
00:13:38,278 --> 00:13:39,654
- Oh. Oh, shit, you know what?
355
00:13:39,654 --> 00:13:41,031
I used to work with ex-felons.
356
00:13:41,031 --> 00:13:42,657
I-I can hire them.
357
00:13:43,617 --> 00:13:44,618
- Okay?
- Yeah.
358
00:13:44,618 --> 00:13:46,036
- Noble route.
- Mm-hmm.
359
00:13:46,036 --> 00:13:48,580
- You could market yourself as like
doing some shit for the community.
360
00:13:48,580 --> 00:13:49,331
- Yup.
361
00:13:49,331 --> 00:13:51,541
- Hey. I'm an ex-felon, and I need a jale.
362
00:13:52,208 --> 00:13:53,084
- Look at that.
363
00:13:53,084 --> 00:13:54,961
You just hired
your first fuckin' employee.
364
00:13:54,961 --> 00:13:56,463
- Great, he's hired. He's hired.
365
00:13:56,463 --> 00:13:57,422
- Hey, hey.
366
00:13:57,422 --> 00:14:00,008
But he can't be my boss and shit.
We need to be like partners.
367
00:14:00,008 --> 00:14:01,885
Make him agree to that shit right now.
368
00:14:02,552 --> 00:14:03,762
- You cool with that?
369
00:14:04,304 --> 00:14:05,305
- Okay.
370
00:14:05,972 --> 00:14:07,265
- Fuck, yeah.
371
00:14:07,807 --> 00:14:10,602
Hey. Guess who's not unemployed anymore?
372
00:14:11,478 --> 00:14:12,479
- That's a start.
373
00:14:13,271 --> 00:14:14,397
SONNY:
Wow, look at that.
374
00:14:14,397 --> 00:14:16,233
All you need now is a location.
JULIO: Mm-hm.
375
00:14:16,233 --> 00:14:19,069
- This motherfucker says he wants
to give up his shop. Isn't that right?
376
00:14:19,819 --> 00:14:21,529
- Yeah, sure.
SONNY: So what do you say?
377
00:14:21,529 --> 00:14:23,448
You gonna sell Julio your lease?
378
00:14:23,448 --> 00:14:24,324
- Whatever.
379
00:14:24,324 --> 00:14:26,868
- Congratu-fuck-alations, Julio. Boom!
380
00:14:27,744 --> 00:14:29,287
You have a reason to live.
381
00:14:29,287 --> 00:14:31,039
You're gonna open up
a fuckin' coffee shop.
382
00:14:31,039 --> 00:14:32,290
- Yeah, thank you.
383
00:14:32,290 --> 00:14:33,625
[panting]
384
00:14:33,625 --> 00:14:35,835
[helicopter blades whirring]
385
00:14:35,835 --> 00:14:38,380
SONNY: [groans]
So, this
386
00:14:39,297 --> 00:14:40,757
oughta cover the lease.
387
00:14:42,217 --> 00:14:45,470
And this should get you
started on your caf�.
388
00:14:46,930 --> 00:14:48,056
- Thank you, Sonny.
389
00:14:48,056 --> 00:14:49,349
SONNY:
Hey.
390
00:14:50,475 --> 00:14:52,227
You better fuckin' write me
while I'm in prison.
391
00:14:52,227 --> 00:14:53,436
- Yeah, I'm gonna write you all the time.
392
00:14:54,062 --> 00:14:55,272
LUIS:
That fool told me the same thing.
393
00:14:56,106 --> 00:14:57,440
Never wrote me shit.
394
00:14:59,234 --> 00:15:01,695
- Oh, shit.
Hey, it's Erika. Move, move, move.
395
00:15:01,695 --> 00:15:03,071
NEWSCASTER 1 [on TV]:
The car is coming to a halt.
396
00:15:03,071 --> 00:15:04,698
The police are surrounding them.
397
00:15:04,698 --> 00:15:06,700
This adventure could be coming to an end.
398
00:15:06,700 --> 00:15:08,243
NEWSCASTER 2:
Oh, I'm not ready.
399
00:15:08,243 --> 00:15:10,662
NEWSCASTER 1:
Bonnie and Clyde have now exited the vehicle.
400
00:15:10,662 --> 00:15:12,205
They're fleeing on foot.
401
00:15:12,205 --> 00:15:13,665
SONNY:
Look at these fools.
402
00:15:14,374 --> 00:15:15,917
NEWSCASTER 2:
But, wait, they've stopped.
403
00:15:15,917 --> 00:15:17,627
NEWSCASTER 1: It looks like Clyde is...
NEWSCASTER 2: Oh.
404
00:15:17,627 --> 00:15:20,255
NEWSCASTER 1:
...getting down on one knee and...
405
00:15:20,255 --> 00:15:22,674
NEWSCASTER 2:
He's proposing!
406
00:15:22,674 --> 00:15:23,925
NEWSCASTER 1:
Wow.
407
00:15:23,925 --> 00:15:25,677
You can see that diamond
from the helicopter.
408
00:15:25,677 --> 00:15:27,554
Please say yes, Bonnie.
I need this.
409
00:15:27,554 --> 00:15:28,722
NEWSCASTER 2:
Oh! She said yes.
410
00:15:28,722 --> 00:15:30,056
She said yes!
411
00:15:30,056 --> 00:15:31,808
NEWSCASTER 1:
I think I might cry.
412
00:15:31,808 --> 00:15:33,435
In fact, I am crying.
413
00:15:33,435 --> 00:15:35,687
I haven't been able to cry
since my divorce.
414
00:15:35,687 --> 00:15:37,314
But now the floodgates are open.
415
00:15:37,314 --> 00:15:39,774
NEWSCASTER 2:
Wow, I've never seen such a passionate kiss.
416
00:15:39,774 --> 00:15:41,735
That's a lot of tongue.
417
00:15:41,735 --> 00:15:42,360
[turns off TV]
418
00:15:43,737 --> 00:15:44,821
[Sonny sighs]
419
00:15:44,821 --> 00:15:46,698
?
420
00:15:46,698 --> 00:15:47,616
- I see it now.
421
00:15:48,408 --> 00:15:49,826
I see how this all ends.
422
00:15:50,827 --> 00:15:52,787
You're not opening that coffee shop.
423
00:15:52,787 --> 00:15:53,622
- What?
424
00:15:53,622 --> 00:15:55,582
- Just like I'm not going to Costa Rica.
425
00:15:56,708 --> 00:15:58,168
- This isn't a Hollywood movie
426
00:15:59,085 --> 00:16:01,671
where everyone's dreams
and ambitions come true.
427
00:16:02,839 --> 00:16:04,007
This is real life.
428
00:16:05,675 --> 00:16:06,718
And you know what?
429
00:16:06,718 --> 00:16:10,680
?
430
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:11,765
I've had enough.
431
00:16:12,474 --> 00:16:13,808
We're going back to plan A.
432
00:16:15,644 --> 00:16:17,604
We're gonna go out there
and rush those fuckin' pigs.
433
00:16:18,271 --> 00:16:20,690
- Look, dude, there's like
a hundred cops out there!
434
00:16:20,690 --> 00:16:21,691
- That's right.
435
00:16:21,691 --> 00:16:25,070
We're gonna get gunned down
and go out in a blaze of glory.
436
00:16:25,070 --> 00:16:25,904
JULIO:
What?
437
00:16:26,404 --> 00:16:29,199
- Clyde y Clyde.
438
00:16:29,199 --> 00:16:31,409
Never again will a woman
ever be able to hurt
439
00:16:31,409 --> 00:16:32,702
either one of us.
440
00:16:32,702 --> 00:16:34,162
- Come on, don't do it, dawg.
441
00:16:34,162 --> 00:16:36,206
Just turn yourself in, alright?
Prison's dope.
442
00:16:36,206 --> 00:16:37,332
They have all the Harry Potters.
443
00:16:37,332 --> 00:16:42,629
- ? Oh, say can you see ?
444
00:16:42,629 --> 00:16:44,256
RUBY:
Luis, come here, come here.
445
00:16:44,256 --> 00:16:48,468
- ? By the dawn's early light ?
446
00:16:48,468 --> 00:16:49,928
ROOKIE:
You got this.
447
00:16:49,928 --> 00:16:51,429
[Sonny singing indistinctly]
Let's go.
448
00:16:51,429 --> 00:16:52,639
Come on.
449
00:16:53,223 --> 00:16:54,307
Ooh, almost there.
450
00:16:54,307 --> 00:16:55,850
SONNY:
? At the twilight's... ?
451
00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:57,185
- Ah, shit.
452
00:16:57,185 --> 00:16:58,270
[singing continues]
Okay.
453
00:16:59,229 --> 00:17:03,316
SONNY:
? Whose broad stripes and bright stars ?
454
00:17:03,316 --> 00:17:05,151
- Oh, shit.
455
00:17:05,151 --> 00:17:06,570
Safety. Yeah.
[gun clicks]
456
00:17:06,570 --> 00:17:08,238
[singing continues]
457
00:17:08,238 --> 00:17:09,864
?
458
00:17:09,864 --> 00:17:10,365
[metal clangs]
459
00:17:11,741 --> 00:17:13,910
[screaming]
460
00:17:13,910 --> 00:17:16,997
?
461
00:17:16,997 --> 00:17:18,790
[gun clicks]
[Farhad groaning]
462
00:17:18,790 --> 00:17:21,918
?
463
00:17:24,254 --> 00:17:26,339
- [in slow motion] Bite him!
464
00:17:26,339 --> 00:17:30,218
?
465
00:17:36,808 --> 00:17:37,559
[yells]
466
00:17:37,559 --> 00:17:39,311
[gun thuds]
JULIO: Get the...
467
00:17:39,311 --> 00:17:41,229
- Ah, you fuckin' bit me!
468
00:17:41,229 --> 00:17:43,148
- Payback, bitch! [laughs]
469
00:17:43,148 --> 00:17:44,858
Never underestimate short fools.
470
00:17:45,942 --> 00:17:46,985
See, I told you I could take him.
471
00:17:47,736 --> 00:17:48,778
- Chill out.
472
00:17:49,321 --> 00:17:52,032
ROOKIE: Hey. [panting]
[Farhad groaning]
473
00:17:52,032 --> 00:17:52,866
You okay?
474
00:17:52,866 --> 00:17:54,326
?
475
00:17:54,326 --> 00:17:56,411
- Are you fucking kidding me?
476
00:17:56,995 --> 00:17:59,039
I was shot by a cop in America.
477
00:17:59,539 --> 00:18:02,667
I am going to sue you
for millions of dollars.
478
00:18:03,543 --> 00:18:05,837
Today is the best day of my life.
479
00:18:05,837 --> 00:18:07,214
[cries]
480
00:18:07,214 --> 00:18:08,965
? I Love L.A. by Randy Newman playing ?
481
00:18:08,965 --> 00:18:09,883
[grunts]
482
00:18:09,883 --> 00:18:12,344
?
483
00:18:15,472 --> 00:18:17,098
- ? Look at that mountain ?
484
00:18:17,098 --> 00:18:18,391
? Look at those trees ?
485
00:18:18,391 --> 00:18:19,142
[Farhad groans]
486
00:18:19,142 --> 00:18:21,102
? Look at that bum over there, man ?
487
00:18:21,102 --> 00:18:21,853
? He's down on his knees ?
488
00:18:21,853 --> 00:18:23,438
- I'm gonna fuckin' kill you, Julio.
489
00:18:23,438 --> 00:18:25,148
I'm gonna fuckin' kill you.
490
00:18:25,148 --> 00:18:27,859
- Est�s bien?
- Estoy bien, estoy bien.
491
00:18:27,859 --> 00:18:29,778
[speaking Spanish]
492
00:18:29,778 --> 00:18:32,781
?
493
00:18:32,781 --> 00:18:35,116
- You cost us a lot of overtime today.
494
00:18:35,116 --> 00:18:37,619
Better watch your back, Serpico.
495
00:18:37,619 --> 00:18:39,454
?
496
00:18:39,454 --> 00:18:40,997
[officers chuckle]
497
00:18:40,997 --> 00:18:42,832
- ? Century Boulevard ?
498
00:18:43,833 --> 00:18:44,626
- ? We love it ?
499
00:18:45,502 --> 00:18:46,461
- ? Victory Boulevard ?
500
00:18:47,462 --> 00:18:48,296
- ? We love it ?
501
00:18:48,713 --> 00:18:50,215
- ? Santa Monica Boulevard ?
502
00:18:51,049 --> 00:18:52,217
- ? We love it ?
503
00:18:52,217 --> 00:18:53,677
- ? Sixth Street ?
504
00:18:53,677 --> 00:18:56,513
- ? We love it, we love it, we love it ?
505
00:18:56,513 --> 00:18:58,056
?
506
00:18:58,056 --> 00:18:59,558
- ? We love LA ?
507
00:18:59,558 --> 00:19:03,979
?
508
00:19:03,979 --> 00:19:05,522
[tires screech]
509
00:19:06,356 --> 00:19:08,692
- Well, dawg, we fuckin' did it.
510
00:19:10,151 --> 00:19:11,361
- Did what?
511
00:19:11,361 --> 00:19:13,363
You almost got us killed,
you fuckin' idiot.
512
00:19:13,363 --> 00:19:14,489
- What the fuck are you talking about?
513
00:19:14,489 --> 00:19:16,116
I had that shit under control
the whole time.
514
00:19:16,116 --> 00:19:18,159
- No, you fuckin' didn't.
515
00:19:18,159 --> 00:19:19,077
- Oh, I'm sorry.
516
00:19:19,077 --> 00:19:21,121
Did you get us 100K to start a business?
517
00:19:21,121 --> 00:19:22,163
That's what I thought.
518
00:19:24,165 --> 00:19:25,375
Look at all this money.
519
00:19:26,501 --> 00:19:27,335
Oh, what's this?
[device beeps, poofs]
520
00:19:27,335 --> 00:19:28,753
- Ooh, shit.
521
00:19:28,753 --> 00:19:30,171
- [coughing] The fuck?
522
00:19:30,171 --> 00:19:31,923
RUBY:
What the fuck?
523
00:19:31,923 --> 00:19:34,634
JULIO: Well, looks like
we at least still have 50K.
524
00:19:34,634 --> 00:19:37,137
? Bad Boys Reply by Inner Circle playing ?
525
00:19:37,137 --> 00:19:38,305
?
526
00:19:38,305 --> 00:19:40,056
LUIS:
The wipers are on the outside, stupid.
527
00:19:40,056 --> 00:19:41,057
JULIO: I know, stupid.
528
00:19:41,057 --> 00:19:42,767
RUBY:
Then why'd you turn them on, stupid?
529
00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:44,936
JULIO: Instinct, stupid.
We almost fucking died,
530
00:19:44,936 --> 00:19:47,063
and you wanna give me shit
about windshield wipers?
531
00:19:47,063 --> 00:19:48,899
- ? Bad boys, bad boys ?
532
00:19:48,899 --> 00:19:50,233
? Whatcha gonna do ?
533
00:19:50,233 --> 00:19:52,652
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
534
00:19:52,652 --> 00:19:54,321
? Bad boys, bad boys ?
535
00:19:54,321 --> 00:19:55,697
? Whatcha gonna do ?
536
00:19:55,697 --> 00:19:58,283
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
537
00:19:58,283 --> 00:20:01,036
? When you were eight
and you had bad traits ?
538
00:20:01,036 --> 00:20:03,747
? You go to school
and learn the golden rule ?
539
00:20:03,747 --> 00:20:06,541
? So why are you
acting like a bloody fool? ?
540
00:20:06,541 --> 00:20:07,751
? If you get hot ?
541
00:20:07,751 --> 00:20:09,127
? Then you must get cool ?
542
00:20:09,127 --> 00:20:10,837
? Bad boy boys, bad boys ?
543
00:20:10,837 --> 00:20:12,214
? Whatcha gonna do ?
544
00:20:12,214 --> 00:20:14,549
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
545
00:20:14,549 --> 00:20:16,301
? Bad boys, bad boys ?
546
00:20:16,301 --> 00:20:17,677
? Whatcha gonna do ?
547
00:20:17,677 --> 00:20:20,263
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
548
00:20:20,263 --> 00:20:21,640
? You chuck it on that one ?
549
00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:23,058
? You chuck it on this one ?
550
00:20:23,058 --> 00:20:24,267
? You chuck it on your mother ?
551
00:20:24,267 --> 00:20:25,810
? And you chuck it on your father ?
552
00:20:25,810 --> 00:20:27,020
? You chuck it on your brother ?
553
00:20:27,020 --> 00:20:28,480
? And you chuck it on your sister ?
554
00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:29,689
? You chuck it on that one ?
555
00:20:29,689 --> 00:20:31,107
? And you chuck it on me ?
556
00:20:31,107 --> 00:20:32,776
? Bad boys, bad boys ?
557
00:20:32,776 --> 00:20:33,985
? Whatcha gonna do ?
558
00:20:33,985 --> 00:20:36,529
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
559
00:20:36,529 --> 00:20:38,114
? Bad boys, bad boys ?
560
00:20:38,114 --> 00:20:39,449
? Whatcha gonna do ?
561
00:20:39,449 --> 00:20:42,035
? Whatcha gonna do
when they come for you? ?
562
00:20:42,035 --> 00:20:43,662
? Bad boys, bad boys... ?
563
00:20:43,712 --> 00:20:48,262
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