All language subtitles for Swimsuit [1989]_EN

(upbeat keyboard music)

¶ I wanna go to paradise ¶

¶ Where the girls all look so nice ¶

¶ They can come from the East or West ¶

¶ But I know where they look the best ¶

¶ I wanna go to paradise ¶

¶ Fall in love just once or twice ¶

¶ Nothin's gonna take me away ¶

¶ 'Cause paradise is where I'll stay ¶

¶ Every day how the sun keeps shinin' ¶

¶ Not a cloud up in the sky ¶

¶ Everywhere love could be hidin' ¶

¶ All you know is you gotta try ¶

¶ Wish that this could last forever ¶

(seagulls calling)

- So, I definitely feel
that we should start

by signing a top model,

one with the biggest name in the industry.

- Absolutely not.

Why should I pay top dollar for someone

I can see on any news rack in the country?

- Well, that's a good point.

- What else have you got?

- Ah, what else?

What else?

Well, that's a good question.

That's a very good
question because actually

my other idea, see, what I
was thinking about we do is

(roller skates rumbling)

is we use them.

See, I mean, it's perfect.

I mean, these kids buy two or
three swimsuits every summer.

We'll make them your models.

- [Mrs. Allison] Go on.

- Yeah, we'll have a talent search.

We'll take unknowns.

We'll make big stars out of 'em.

I'm talkin' about kids with that,

with that natural healthy California look,

you know, athletes with the
best bodies on the beach.

Mrs. Allison, they'll be
wearin' your swimsuits.

- Catherine Allison, star maker.

- Yeah.

- I know a fabulous talent scout.

(phone ringing)

You went to Northwestern with my nephew,

and now he's working with a big
modeling agency in New York.

I'll see if I can't steal him away.

- Well, Mrs. Alison,

that's real sweet of
you to offer the help.

And I can understand why
you'd want your own guy there,

but generally in the
past, what I'd like to do.

See, I enjoy working alone.

- Don't worry, darling.

You'll love him.

Everyone loves Willard.

(phone keys beeping)

- Willard?

- [Willard] Hey, Hey, wait up.

I really am a modeling agent.

Look, I got a card.

- Honey, everyone has a card.

- I forgive you.

- [Announcer] Flight 702 is pre-boarding.

Passengers traveling with small children

or needing assistance,
please come to gate five.

- Wow, what a weird coincidence.

My name's Willard Thurm too.

- Brian Rutledge.

Hope you didn't dress
like that on my account.

- It's my California look.

When I'm scouting, I
like to be inconspicuous.

Hey, you girls wanna be rich and famous?

- Down, boy.

Come on, we'll start the
talent search in Newport Beach.

We're lookin' for six models
for the duration of the summer.

Four girls, two guys.

Okay, here's the schedule I drew up.

Now, I arranged for two bikini contests,

but other than that, we're on our own.

- Bikini contests?
- Yeah.

- Hey, for a guy in a tie, I
like the way your brain works.

- Well, I hope you've all had an eyeful.

I know I have.

(people applauding)

I'd like to thank the other contestants.

We have a winner, ladies and
gentlemen, a Romella Loopeski.

- No, that's Loopesko.

- Uh huh, and you've been here for a year

studying at UCLA as a
foreign exchange student.

- Oh, yeah, that's true.

I am the first in the history
of my family to go to college

and the first person to
come here to America.

They don't understand
why I want to be here,

but they are very proud of me, you know?

- That's very charming.

Now, have you ever worked

on your father's pig farm in Hungary?

- No, no, I have scholarship.

I am student at Fashion
Institute in Budapest.

This of course is why I want so much

to be Saltaire model so that
I can, how do you say that?

I can rip off American fashion
industry from the inside job.

(seagull calling)

(upbeat keyboard music)

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ I wanna go to paradise ¶

¶ Where the girls all look so nice ¶

- [Brian] No, no.

My ex-wife and all her
self-indulgent actor friends

were into this weird martial arts stuff.

No, that's all I need is another nutball.

- Look, I'm a graduate
of Yale drama school.

I did "Shakespeare in
the Park" in New York.

I wouldn't feel comfortable

parading around half naked in a bikini.

- There you go.

Let's go.

- Yeah, but who knows?

This could open up a lot of doors.

I've been a talent scout for four years.

Take my word for it.

You got it.

- I got it?

- Yeah.

Hey, modeling could pay for
a lot of acting classes.

- Well, I have to admit
I could use the money.

My parents cut me off after college.

They'd probably love it if I was so broke,

I had to slink back to Connecticut

with my tail between my legs.

- [Willard] Well, if you took this job,

you could support yourself for a year.

- Forget it.

Forget it.

Actresses are flakes.

Besides, she gets an audition,

she's not gonna show up at all.

And this girl?

Come on, she couldn't look sexy
if her life depended on it.

(seagull calling)

- Excuse me, but first of all,
all actresses are not flaky,

any more than all ad agency
executives are sleazeballs.

- Let me tell you somethin'.

- Secondly.
- You know what?

You have an attitude problem.
- You may not think

I'm sexy, Mr. Rutledge,

but one of the advantages of
being a highly trained actress

is that I can be whatever I want to be.

You want sexy?

(upbeat rock music)

¶ You got the look ¶

¶ You got the touch ¶

¶ Can you give me something more ¶

- You want sexy?

¶ Is it love like a hurricane ¶

¶ Or is it love like I've had before ¶

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ Try not to break my heart ¶

(tennis ball popping)

- [Willard] Brian, we've seen
20 guys in Santa Barbara.

I think he's the best so far.

(camera shutter clicking)

- The thing is we don't
need models that read.

We need models that look good.

(camera shutter clicking)

- Looks pretty good to me.

(tennis ball popping)

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ Sometimes you win ¶

¶ Sometimes you lose ¶

- Well, no one in El Segundo.

Why don't we grab a burger?

I'm starved.

¶ It's hard to find it late at night ¶

¶ Or the time to remember his name ¶

¶ Try not to break my heart ¶

- I'll tell you somethin', Willard.

I am tired of the beach, and
I am tired of blue skies,

and I am tired of breasts,
and navels, and behinds.

- I agree, Brian, it's a horrible job,

but somebody's gotta do it.

- Yeah?

- Miss, I've been waiting over 15 minutes.

What's taking so long?

- Look, I'm sorry.

Our cook cut off part of his finger,

and my manager had to
take him to the hospital.

So, I'm here all alone.

So, here you go.

Sorry it took so long.

- Let's go.

I lost my appetite.

- Wait a minute, she's cute.

(grill sizzling)

- Here's your cola.

- [Customer] It's flat.

- Look, our machine's broken.

I'll get you another one, okay?

I'm sorry.

- Excuse me.

We're with the Saltaire
Models Talent Search.

Have you ever thought about modeling?

- Modeling?

Seriously?

- Hey, I got a card.

- Ever since I was a little girl.

I mean, my mom even enrolled me

in John Robert Powers' school
when I was nine years old

for modeling, but then my dad died,

and we really couldn't
afford it anymore so.

God, I'm sorry.

I'm just carrying on like this,

but it's just that I do
anything for the chance to try.

I mean it.

- Well, we're looking for a
few good women. (chuckling)

You good at any sports?

- Sports?

Um, everything I love sports.

- [Customer] Hey, I'm still
waiting for that cola.

- [Rosy] It's coming.

It's coming.

- How about horseback riding?

You ever do any horseback riding?

- Horses, sure.

- Okay, how about wind surfing?

Do you ever do any water skiing?

- Sure.

(water spraying)

Turn this machine off.

(upbeat soft rock music)

¶ School is out ¶

¶ And nothin's gonna hold us down ¶

- Come on.

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ It's got the best lookin' girls around ¶

¶ All day and all night
we got no trouble ¶

¶ Everything is fine ¶

¶ Love is here ¶

¶ That's summertime ¶

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ Everybody come on ¶

¶ Everybody's gonna be there ¶

(camera shutter clicking)

¶ We've been waitin' for such a ¶

- [Willard] Ty, just
relax and be yourself.

So, you're a native Californian?

- Yeah.

- Do you have any hobbies?

What do you like to do
with your spare time?

- I don't know.

Surf.

- Surf?

Okay, tell us about surfing.

Do you ever enter any contests?

- Yeah, I was almost the first goofy foot

to win the nationals,

but I forgot to show up for my heat.

Is that a sweet roll?

So anyway, what were
we talkin' about again?

(camera shutter clicking)

(seagull calling)

(upbeat rock music)

¶ Knock, knock on the bedroom door ¶

¶ Guess who's comin' back for more ¶

¶ I've been squeezed out
and rolled up tight ¶

¶ But that don't mean
I won't give it a try ¶

- [Willard] Wow, look at that.

(car doors banging)

(seagull calling)

¶ Some girls are to touch and tease ¶

- [Willard] Brian, I love her.

- No, you don't.

- [Guy In The Tux] Jade, you'll call me?

Jade?

- [Jade] You were great.

Thanks.

(camera shutter clicking)

(seagulls calling)

- Excuse us.

- I think I'm in love with you.

- Don't mind him.

We're with the Saltaire
Model Talent Search.

Now, I know what you're thinkin',

but this could be a great opportunity

for a young woman with your credentials.

- How much does it pay?

- [Brian] 10 grand for six weeks work.

- Have a nice life.

- Plus a $25,000 bonus if you're picked up

for the US magazine swimsuit issue.

- [Brian] In addition to that,

three of the models
will be signed next year

to an exclusive contract worth $150,000.

(camera shutter clicking)

- You might be interested in knowing

that I have no tan lines anywhere.

- Would you care to corroborate that?

- Sure, just ask the Swedish ski team.

- [Brian] What do they call you?

- Jade, as in the rather overrated

pale green stone from the Orient.

Personally, I prefer emeralds.

They're so much sparklier.

(camera shutter clicking)

- Now, what I was thinking
I'd like to do is just.

- Now, what I was
thinking I'd like to do is

set the shoot for next week in Hawaii.

- Fine.

Now, why don't you give
these kids the good news?

(phone ringing)

(mellow country music)

- Yeah?

Rosy, telephone.

- I'll be there in a minute.

(soda machine spraying)

(people chattering)

Hello?

Thank you.

I got it.

I got it.

I got it.

I got it.

They picked me.

I'm gonna be a famous model.

Oh oh.

- [Customer] Miss, could I get?

- Oh, wait, I forgot.

Here you go, Jim.

Good luck to you, and I quit.

Bye.

Look for me in magazines, everybody,

'cause I'm gonna be a famous model.

(squealing)

- Sweetheart, I just don't understand

why you gotta live in
some hotel for six weeks

when you could just as easily live here

and drive in every day.

- Well, that's the rules, Mom.

See, when we get back from Hawaii,

we all have to stay in the hotel

'cause I think they just
want to keep an eye on us.

- Hawaii, always wanted to go there.

Never made it.

- Mom, do you think I
have too many freckles?

- [Mom] Sweetheart, you are
pretty in your own special way.

Besides, if this modeling
thing doesn't work out,

you can always come back
home where you belong.

- Brooke Shields, Lauren Hutton,

a lot of these people started as models.

Miss Loopeski, you're right on time.

- Loopesko.

Very happy to have you.

- Yeah, Mr. Axleman, yes, sir.

I gave you what I could.

Yeah, that's right.

Listen, I'm gonna give you
the rest of it in July.

I'm gonna give you
everything you deserve, okay?

Okay, bye.

- Brian, I have a question.

If you would be kind to
take me into your wing

and learn me the ropes
of swimsuit advertising,

I promise you I will
be very, very grateful.

- Whatever you said, no.

Now, get on the bus.

(car engine humming)

(car engine rumbling)

- Marvin, darling, I still have

two weeks to make my payment.

So, why don't you just disappear?

- I'm just makin' sure
she's in good condition.

Dealer's already got a buyer for her,

and sometimes you're a little
rough on the merchandise.

(suitcase thudding)

- Well, tell him not to hold his breath.

See that bus over there?

That's my high-paying job waiting.

Now I'll be able to pay
for whatever I want.

- Well, I'm real glad to
hear that, Miss Greene,

'cause you know, I worry about you.

Some people seem to always want more

than they can pay for no
matter how much they got.

- Haven't you heard, Marv?

That's the American way.

- Hi, remember me?

Willard Thurm, your future husband.

- Oooh.

(suitcases thudding)

- So, who's this guy?

Should I be jealous?

- Not that it's any of your business,

but that's Marvin Potter,
the man who's made

repossessing my possessions
his life's work.

Bye.

Traveling by bus, how glamorous.

- So, you're a stockbroker?

- Well, not at the moment.

- Oh, why not?

- Well, I haven't been able
to find a job since the crash.

- That's too bad,

but you're still following
the market, yeah?

- Religiously.

I'm ahead too, at least on paper.

- Come to my room tonight.

I want you alone.

- Ah, no thanks, but thanks for asking.

- Hi, I'm really sorry I'm late.

- Set it down.

I'll get to it in a minute.

- Chris?

- I'm sorry, I don't.

- No, it's me.

It's Rosy Campbell.

- Rosy?

Well, look at you.

Wow, Kevin's little
sister's all grown up, huh?

- Hey, it's been three years. (laughing)

- Yeah.

Wait a minute, you're
not one of the models?

- I know, it's a miracle.

And would you believe
that until one week ago

I was working at the Burger
Roundup on Rosecrantz.

- Is that right?

Well, tell me, does any of the old gang

still hang out there?

- Yeah, all of 'em.

It's pathetic.

And, believe me,

it was the last place
that I wanted to end up,

but with my grades, college was out so.

Kevin told me you went
to Long Beach State.

- Yeah, that's right.

That's right.

I was a business major.

Graduated last spring.

- [Rosy] Well, what are you doin' here?

- Well, I work for Brian.

I'm kind of a production assistant/driver.

- [Brian] Hey, Chris,
tick tock, tick tock.

Come on, pal.

- Official title, slave boy. (laughing)

- Hey, buddy, we gotta.

Rosy, you're here.

All right, sweetheart.

Why don't you get on the bus?

Let's give this to our pal, Chris, here.

Thank you.

Okay, sweetheart.

- [Rosy] I'll see you later.

- Yeah.

- Yeah, go on now.

Go on up.

- I tell you it is such a small world.

You know, I went to high
school with that girl?

I think she had a little crush on me.

- Ah, great, this is what I need, right?

Chris, let me tell you something.

I don't want anything
distracting these models, okay?

You wanna be friends?

Hey, I'm all for that,

but you gotta know where to draw the line.

- Relax, Brian.

Come on, she's a cute kid, but
if I wanted to get involved

with somebody like Rosy Campbell

I would've stayed in
El Segundo, all right?

(door banging)

Okay?

(hand pounding)

- May I have two minutes
of your time please?

As you know, this is a competition.

You all have six weeks to
show us what you can do.

Now, you'll all have a
chance to be in the brochure,

two TV commercials, some print
ads, and some billboards.

When we arrive back from Hawaii,

there will be daily workouts at the hotel

supervised by Willard and Chris.

I expect each of you to be
there every day and on time.

Now, there's a lot at stake

so I'm sure you'll all want
to look your very best,

which means no drinking, no smoking,

no late nights, or wild parties.

- But other than that, have fun.

- [Willard] Yeah (laughing).

Sorry.

- Now, there's only three of you

who will be chosen for next
year, two girls and a guy.

Screw up, and you're out.

However, if you make it,
you'll be $150,000 richer.

- Your two minutes are up.

It's a joke.

He said he wanted to talk for two minutes.

Get it?

(upbeat keyboard music)

¶ I wanna go to paradise ¶

¶ Where the girls all look so nice ¶

¶ They can come from the East or West ¶

¶ But I know where they look the best ¶

¶ I wanna go to paradise ¶

¶ Fall in love just once or twice ¶

(people chattering)

- This is incredible.

This is beautiful.

- Yep.

Actually I've been here before.

Good old Bjorn.

He had the most incredible
body in the world,

plus he didn't speak a word of English.

It was perfect.

(Rosy laughing)

- Oh God, I can't believe I'm in Hawaii.

What do you think the
shoot's gonna be like?

- Listen, all you have to do is

follow directions and look gorgeous.

Now, how difficult can that be?

(birds chirping)

(alarm buzzing)

- Oh, Jade, what a beautiful day.

(alarm clock crashing)

(ice clattering)

- Oooh.

- What is that for?

- I always look puffy if
I don't get enough sleep.

Ice helps.

- Really?
- Mmm hmm.

(Rosy gasping)

(Jade laughing)

- [Guy] This is a real
tree, is it not, man?

- [Brian] All right, why don't we start

with some wider angle lenses?

Let's see a little bit of the background.

- [Guy] How come those guys
got to carry the palms?

- [Rosy] God, it's too early.

- Yes, what I love about
modeling is the glamor.

Here.

Hold these on your eyes.

It will help you look rested.

- Thank you.

- That's what I call a cucumber sandwich.

I'll get the mayo.

- Please, it's too early
in the morning for you.

- Now, be nice.

I'm gonna be a very
successful guy someday.

I'm starting my own modeling
agency in two years.

- Good, then call me in two years.

- Brian wants you in full body makeup.

You're not dark enough.

(people chattering)

- [Guy] Hold this.

Don't let it blow over.

- [Guy] You gotta dig a hole.

You gotta have sand under it.

- Uh uh uh.

- I can look, can't I?

(seagull calling)

- Why does this feel so slimy?

- Either it's mineral oil,

or this is the one I
sneezed in this morning.

- Okay, Willard, Chris,

everybody, can I have
your attention please?

I wanna huddle up

before we go in a thousand
different directions.

What I wanna do now, Willard,
while the light's still good,

let's shoot the horses down in this area.

And I think I want to use
Romella, Scott, and Rosy, okay?

Let's get that together.

- [Willard] Romella, Scott, Rosy.

(waves crashing)

- Well, here goes nothing.

(upbeat '80s music)

(horse whinnying)

Ah, oh, God.

Ah, how do you make this thing stop?

(horse whinnying)

Watch out, oh.

(horse whinnying)

- [Guy] Oh, man.

Somebody get the horse.

- [Guy] Are you okay?

- [Rosy] I'm fine.

- All right, clean her up.

(horse whinnying)

¶ Somethin's gettin' into me ¶

(Rosy crying out)

- Hey, Rosy, let's go, up.

- That's all right.

Take it easy.

You're doin' great.

- Ah.

- That's it.

(crying out)

(water splashing)

- Now, right into the camera.

(camera shutter clicking)

That's it.

Now, nice and sensuous.

I said sensuous.

- You try looking sensuous
with sand in your pants.

(waves crashing)

(seagull calling)

- You're the big actress.

Try acting like somebody
who feels sensuous

with sand in their pants.

(waves crashing)

(seagull calling)

All right, let's try it again.

¶ Oh, it must be you ¶

¶ Oh, it must be you ¶

¶ Oh, it must be you ¶

(girls screaming)

(people chattering)

- Oh, are you?

She's okay?

Rosy?

- Okay, when we hit 30, 35 miles an hour,

I want a big smile, okay?

And no matter what happens, keep smiling.

(boat engine revving)

All right, Rosy.
- Okay.

Are you ready, darlin'?

Okay.

- Ah, ah, ah, oh, ah, ah.

Ah, ah.

- Whoa, let go of the rope.

- Let go.

Rosy, Rosy, just let go of the rope.

(Rosy crying out)

Let go of the rope.

- Let go.

Let go.

Throw her the preserver.

All right, all right.

That's that's a wrap on the skiing, okay?

(people chattering)

You all right, Rosy?

No broken bones or anything?

- No, I'm okay.

- Okay.

- I'll be better next time.

- No, I'm sorry, there
isn't gonna be a next time.

Rosy, I'm lettin' you go.

- What?

It's only my first day.

- And you messed up every
shot you've been in, doll.

Do you know how much time
and money you cost me?

- You can't fire me.

You said that you wanted
real California beach kids.

Well, you can't get more real than me.

I grew up two blocks from the beach.

- Yeah, and you lied to get the job.

You can't ride.

You can't ski.

What am I supposed to do?

- I can learn.

I'm a real hard worker.

I'll get better.

- [Chris] I'll teach ya how to water ski.

- You've gotta give me
another chance, Brian.

You got to.

- (sighing) Okay, I'll tell you what.

I'll give you another shot,

but if you mess up, you're out.

I mean, if you cost me any time at all,

a minute, a second, you're out.

All right.

(mellow Hawaiian music)

- Chris, hi.

- Hi.

- Willard said I'd find you out here.

What's that?

- Well, this, this is a glass buoy.

I'll clean it up.

It'll be as good as new.

- What are you gonna do with it?

- I'm gonna store this one.

I plan to open on my
own prop house someday.

All I need is the startup money.

You got 50 grand on ya?

- Sorry, I'm all out.

- I'll get the money somehow.

I mean, this job pays great.

Plus, I applied for a loan.

- [Rosy] Well, you sound very determined.

- I am.

- I wanted to thank you again
for sticking up for me today.

I really appreciate it.

- Sure.

- Chris, I don't wanna lose this job.

Ever since I was a kid, I
always read about models

traveling all over the world,
to Europe and the Orient.

And I think about my mom.

I mean, she's 40 years old
and still waiting on tables.

She's never been outside of California.

I don't wanna end up like that.

Chris, I really gotta
make this thing work.

(plane engine rumbling)

- Excuse me, Brian.

Excuse me, Brian.

- What, what, what,
what, what, what, what?

My parents' plane is just landing.

They're coming in from New York,

and I want Rosy to have
dinner with us, okay?

- I don't know.

I mean, you got a full schedule.

We have workouts tomorrow.

- I promise we'll be home early.

Thank you.

I appreciate it.

And here are claim checks for our baggage.

Come on, let's go.

- Bye.
- Now, wait a.

Wait.

All right, but only this one time.

- Isn't this a coincidence
that your parents' plane

is getting it at the same time as ours?

- It's no coincidence.

It's a brilliant fabrication.

- [Rosy] But you told Brian that your?

- I lied.

It's party night.

- Wait a second.

What if Brian finds out?

How are we gonna get back to the hotel?

- Have you heard the expression taxi?

- Dude, we are gonna get
into so much trouble.

If I lose this job, I'm gonna kill you.

Besides, I've got nothing to wear.

- Rosy, darling, when are
you gonna learn to trust me?

- [Announcer] Arriving
passenger Bob Rosky,

please go to a white courtesy phone.

- [Rosy] Jade, where are we going?

- It's a surprise,

but I can promise you one thing.

You've never seen anything like it.

(mellow jazz music)

- We're gonna get in
big trouble. (laughing)

- [Jade] I certainly hope so.

(both laughing)

- This is incredible.

- [Jade] I told you to trust me.

(dishes clattering)

(people chattering)

- Oh, wait, Jade, is that
Candy Harper, the model?

- [Jade] Yeah, yeah, you're right.

- Oh, she's beautiful.

- Yeah, I suppose she is
in a surgical kind of way.

- Oh.

- Come on, let's mingle.

- [Rosy] Beautiful.

(tray thudding)

(Rosy screaming)

(glass crashing)

Oh, I'm really sorry.

I didn't see you.

- Rosy, come on.

- [Guy] Hey, Jade, Jade.

I thought you said you were coming

to David's party in New York last week.

- Did I?

Where was I?

- [Rosy] Jade, you're not
supposed to be drinking.

- [Jade] Come on, I
won't tell if you don't.

(people chattering)

(tapping)

- Ew.

Oh, that's, that's gross.

- I completely agree.

Come on, I'll show you something

a little more pleasant to look at.

(gentle soft rock music)
(glasses clinking)

- Hmm.

That's the trouble with these places.

You can't tell the sharks from the sharks.

- A lawyer?

- No.

- A gangster? (laughing)

- Have you ever heard of
Chadway's Boutique on Rodeo Drive?

- Of course.

Oh, you're that Hart Chadway?

- That's why I have to
go to New York next week

to buy the winter line.

Why don't you come with me?

- I just met you an hour ago.

- Well, what better way to get appointed?

- No.

Besides, I wouldn't fit in
with your kind of crowd.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- A department store heir

and a fast food waitress from El Segundo?

It's sounds like an old
Marilyn Monroe movie.

- Well, I happen to like
old Marilyn Monroe movies.

- Well, I never went to college,

and you probably went to Yale or Harvard.

- Princeton, and, not that it matters,

but I was a Rhodes Scholar.

- You studied maps or something?

(laughing)

(laughing)

See, it wouldn't work.

I don't even know what's funny.

- You're funny.

How did you get to be so adorable?

- I don't know.

I'm just lucky, I guess.

How did you get to be so corny?

I've never been in a limo
before and look at his house.

What do you think?

- Not bad.

(footsteps echoing)

- Here you are.

This is my favorite novel.

- "The Sound and the
Fury" by William Faulkner.

Gee, I don't think I've ever read a book

without pictures in it before.

- Well, you'd better read this one.

I'm going to call and test you on it.

- Well, I certainly hope
it's multiple choice.

(crickets chirping)

- [Hart] I'll call you.

- Bye.

(limo engine starting)

You know what he kind of reminds me of?

A young Cary Grant.

The way he carries himself.

- Rosy, I'd hold off on
the wedding invitations.

You just met the guy.

- I know.

It's just I've never known
anyone like him before.

- Fine, have a good time.

Just don't get carried away.

Take my word for it.

Love is entirely overrated.

- Jade, how can you say that?

- I know.

I tried it once.

You're a sweet person.

I don't want to see you
get your heart broken.

(cork popping)

- Oh, I won't.

I, with this job I have
too much on my mind anyway.

The last thing I need is to fall in love.

- To not falling in love.

- Unless it's absolutely necessary.

(glass clinking)

(upbeat electronica music)

¶ Found the love ¶

¶ Tonight's the time for love ¶

¶ Sweet surrender ¶

¶ I can't fight it ¶

¶ You sense the time ¶

¶ Come and touch me with those eyes ¶

¶ Oh ¶

¶ Won't you hurry ¶

¶ Won't you hurry home to me ¶

¶ I want the night time and you ¶

¶ 'Cause I know what I'm gonna do ¶

¶ Oh, I want the night time to find me ¶

¶ Holdin' you ¶

¶ Time to touch ¶

¶ Night's the time to hold you ¶

¶ My heart is poundin' with the beat ¶

¶ Won't you hold me close ¶

¶ You're the feelin' I want most ¶

¶ Oh ¶

¶ Won't you hurry ¶

¶ Won't you hurry home to me ¶

¶ I want the night time ¶

- Hey, guys.

Sorry I'm late.

- I hope we didn't keep you
from something really important.

- I made it, didn't I?

- All right, Chris, let's go.

(whistle sounding)

(water splashing)

¶ Won't you hold me close ¶

¶ You're the feelin' I want most ¶

¶ Oh ¶

¶ Won't you hurry ¶

¶ Won't you hurry home to me ¶

(whistle sounding)

¶ I want the night time and you ¶

- Oh.

Oh.

Oh, God, I need a vacation.

- Has anyone ever told
you you're very beautiful

when you're hyperventilating?

- I'm relaxing.

Please go away.

(water splashing)

- Scott, we will have
dinner tonight, my treat.

- Romella, I don't think
that's such a good idea.

- No, no, no, no, no, I insist,

and I will not take a no for an answer.

So, I'll meet you in the
lobby, eight o'clock sharply.

- Good book?

- I don't know.

I cannot understand a word of this.

- [Chris] Then, why are you readin' it?

- I met a guy last week,

and it's kind of a homework assignment.

- A guy?

What kinda guy gives you homework?

- Oh no, you don't understand.

He's very intelligent
and very interesting,

and I'd really rather he not
find out what a dope I am.

- Well, I think you should just
relax and be yourself, Rosy.

- I thought of that,
but it would never work.

(soft jazz music)

- Thank you very much.

Well, I am so happy to
finally have you alone.

I'm hoping this for two weeks now.

- Look, look, Romella.

There's something important
I have to tell you.

- Mmm hmm?

- I'm not interested in
women, sexually I mean.

I'm sorry.

- Scott, you slay me.

You didn't think that I am
wanting to attract you for sex?

No, what a classic mixed
up understanding, no.

- I don't get it.

So, why the big deal
about seeing me alone?

- I am wanting to need
your advice with something,

but we must keep it under your tack.

- All right, just relax.

We'll get it this time.

- That's really easy for you to say.

You haven't swallowed
half this stupid lake.

- Come on, come on, one more try.

All right, just relax there.

Okay, all right, let's go.

(boat engine revving)

¶ I wanna believe in love ¶

¶ I was deceived ¶

¶ I was in love ¶

¶ I was the man that you want ¶

¶ With lovers before ¶

¶ Why couldn't it be ¶

- So, is all of this
stuff for your prop shop?

- Yeah, I went to the dump yesterday.

It's amazing what people throw away.

- Oh, these are so adorable.

- [Chris] You want 'em?

They're yours.

- Oh, no, I couldn't.

- [Chris] Oh, go ahead.

I can always get another pair.

- Thanks.

- So, you never told me.

How'd you do on your homework assignment?

- He never called.

I guess he figured out that
I was too dumb to read.

- Guy's got no taste.

- Are you kidding?

He's got class oozing out of every pore.

- Really?

(door banging)

If he had class, he'd of called.

¶ You're not like the rest ¶

¶ I know you're one of the best ¶

(people chattering)

- Oh, this is the life.

- There she is.

- Jade, we're gonna be late.

- Relax.

I'll be just a minute.

(car alarm sounding)

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Get out of my car.

- Ain't your car now, Miss Greene.

(car engine spurting)

Now, it belongs to the bank.

- Marv, how many times
do I have to tell ya?

We get paid next week.

And when I get paid, the bank gets paid.

- The bank just don't
see it that way, Miss.

- Don't take my car.

I'll write you a check.

- A check's no good with
no funds in the bank.

(car engine spurting)

- All right, Marv, you win.

Take the car,

but at least let me get my things

out of the glove compartment.

- Well, all right.

- Look, Marv, it's all gonna be

community property someday anyway.

How much does she need?

- [Marvin] Oh, about 35,000.

- Dollars?

- Of course that's just for the Porsche,

not countin' what she owes on
stereo, clothes, and jewelry.

- [Willard] Well, here, here's 17.

- How'd she do that?

(tires squealing)

(car engine revving)

Come back here.

- She'll wind up in jail.

- No, she won't.

I won't let her.

(dramatic electronica music)

(tires squealing)

(tires squealing)

(tires squealing)

(car engine revving)

(tires squealing)

(tires squealing)

(car horns honking)

(tires squealing)

(tires squealing)

(car horn honking)

(fence crashing)

(birds chirping)

- [Woman] Get some
tables over here please.

- [Man] Make sure we have
plenty of that black.

- No, it's inexcusable for
Jane to be late like this.

- But.

- But, it's my fault really, Brian.

I gave her the wrong call time.

She'll be here any minute, I promise.

- She better be.

- For a quick killing, we're
talking one of two things,

index option trading or
the commodities market.

- What, and risk losing
the shorts off my back?

No, thank you, mister.

Not with my paycheck.

Please, make for me low-risk
short-term investment

with highest possible yield.

- Right, and then I'll turn a
room full of straw into gold.

(door banging)

- Yes, this is Maria Detney.

If anyone from NBC calls for me,

please let them know that
I'm at 5-5-5-4-0-1-2.

Thank you.

- What, you have big part in movie?

- No, it's a TV pilot.

- Oh, my Uncle Lazlo is
flying planes in Hungary.

- But I'm really not too optimistic

because I probably would
have heard from them by now

if I'd gotten the call back.

- Look, Jerry, wait a minute.

I know the schedule is impossible,

but I only got a week to edit
and deliver this commercial,

or I'm out of a job, guy.

(phone ringing)

Hold on.

What?

(people chattering)

(phone banging)

- Damn it, Maria, I don't want you

to even think about goin'
to that call back today.

We are shootin' a commercial here.

- [Maria] I realize that.

I've already told them I couldn't make it.

- Well, what am I
supposed to do next time?

I mean, what if you get an acting job?

- Look, Brian, I was honest
with you from the beginning.

Okay, I'm gonna continue
pursuing my career.

And if you can't live with that, fire me.

- [Willard] Here she is.

- [Rosy] Jade, where have you been?

- We're goin' crazy.

Are you okay?

- I'm fine, honestly.

- What happened?

- Well, the good news is that the bank

doesn't get to keep my Porsche either.

Look, I owe the cab driver 15 bucks.

I'll owe you one, okay?

- I'll be right back to help
you out of those wet things.

- Will, I think I can
handle it from here, thanks.

- Will?

I like that.

- He covered for you.

He said he gave you the wrong call time.

- You're kidding?

(panther roaring)

- Come on, I'll help you change.

(upbeat rock music)

(bird screeching)

(roaring)

(roaring)

- All right, Rosy, how ya doin' up there?

Ready?

¶ It's happening deep within my heart ¶

- All right, Rosy.

Okay, let's roll here.

Quiet on the set please.

Any time you're ready.

All right, action.

(Rosy crying out)

¶ Night patrol ¶

¶ Movin' on the night patrol ¶

¶ And I'm about to lose control ¶

(crying out)

- Get me down.

Oh, get me off of this thing.

Oh.

- So.

- Look, I can't help it
if I'm scared of heights.

Just don't rush me, and
I'll get it right this time.

(phone ringing)

- Talk to me.

It's for you.

- What?

Well, I'm busy.

You should've called two weeks ago.

- Rosy, let me.

- Now, look, you can
hassle me if you want to,

but I would rather shoot this thing, okay?

All right.
- Hey.

Hey, hey, what'd I do?

What'd I do?

What'd I do?

- Okay, let's do this.

- [Brian] Anytime you're ready.

We're waitin' for you, darling.

¶ Night patrol ¶

¶ Movin' on the night patrol ¶

¶ And I'm about to lose control ¶

¶ I can't get away ¶

Hey, hey, beautiful.

(people applauding)

Beautiful.

¶ Night patrol ¶

¶ You think ¶

- [Rosy] Oh, God, I can't
believe I hung up on him.

- Don't worry.

Men love abuse.

Don't you read Cosmo?

(knocking on door)

- [Man] Delivery for Rosy Campbell.

- I'm Rosy Campbell.

Oh, thanks.

Oh, Hart, they're beautiful, really.

Tonight?

Well, you have to hang on.

I have to check my book.

Well, you know, I do have
tentative plans with Rob Lowe.

(laughing)

Okay, but I have to be home early

'cause I have workouts
starting at seven o'clock.

Are you trying to corrupt me already?

Okay, well, I'll see you then.

Bye.

(phone clicking)

(gentle chamber music)

(people chattering)

Let me guess.

It's a little pancake flipper.

- No.

- Hart, you haven't introduced me

to your cute little friend here.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

Candy Harper, this is Rosanna Campbell.

Rosanna is a model also.

- Oh, isn't that exciting?

- Miss Harper, it is such
an honor to meet you.

I have been the biggest fan of yours

ever since I was a little girl.

- How sweet.

- No, I didn't mean it that way.

- [Candy] Hart, this
music is just splendid.

It's Haydn, isn't it?

- Yes, I believe so.

- [Candy] Well, it's lovely.

- Sweet breads, Miss?

- What are sweet breads?

- I believe it's from the
thymus gland of a calf.

- I'm not a big thymus gland eater.

No, thank you.

Hart?

Why me?

You could have anybody you want.

Why me?

- Well, because I'm crazy
about you, that's why.

Everything is so new and exciting for you.

When I'm with you,

I get to experience the whole world again.

- That's really funny

'cause I only like you
cause you smell so good.

(laughing)

- You're the only woman
who can make me laugh.

So there.

Stay with me tonight.

I want you next to me in the morning.

- I can't.

I already told you

I have a seven o'clock
workout in the morning.

- [Hart] I'll send you
a note from my doctor.

- I'd better get out of here,

or you really will corrupt me.

Bye.

Thanks for dinner.

- You see, I like that.

Good manners even when she's rejecting me.

- I'm not rejecting you.

I'm just sort of shifting
you into a lower gear.

(laughing)

- Ah.

All right, you tell me
when can I see you again?

- Well, how about Wednesday?

Saltaire's having this fashion
show thing on the Queen Mary,

and the models aren't gonna be in it,

but we're gonna be introduced.

Do you wanna go?

- I don't think I can wait that long.

- [Rosy] Jade, you're
not gonna believe this.

- [Jade] God, where'd you get this stuff?

- Hart sent it.

Isn't he great?

Just look at all this stuff.

Look.

- Victor Costa, not bad.

Hey, thinks of everything.

Matching bag, shoes.

Uh oh, this looks more
like a gift for him.

- Give it here.

Give it here.

No, he's great.

He sent all this stuff, but
now I've got to send it back.

- Rosy, the man is worth millions.

It probably gives him
a thrill to pamper you.

You don't wanna ruin his day, do you?

- No.

- So, send him a thank you
note and count your blessings.

- Okay.

Oh, wait, look.

He sent me these books too.

He's such a sweetheart.

(knocking on door)

- Ah, it's the fur.

I know it.

- No, wait.

- Ah. (laughing)

- I'll get it.

Hi.

- [Chris] Hi.

- Would you like to come in?

- No, no thanks.

I'm just, um.

Well, I promised Brian I wouldn't do this,

but what the hell?

Would you be my date for the fashion show?

I rented a tux and everything.

- Um.

(motorcycle engine humming)

(brakes squealing)

- [Announcer] Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to the Saltaire
Swimsuit Fashion Show.

Tonight, you'll meet the contestants

for our new modeling campaign

and have a peek at our newest,
splashiest swimwear line.

These swimsuits are multipurpose.

You can dance, exercise,
or just plain swim in them.

From new wave to cruise wear,

we hope you have a swimming time tonight.

(upbeat Latin music)

(crowd gasping)

(crowd applauding)

(people chattering)

(upbeat '80s music)

(camera shutter clicking)

(laughing)

¶ Somethin's getting into you ¶

¶ Ooh ooh it must be you ¶

¶ Somethin's gettin' into me ¶

¶ Ooh ooh it must be you ¶

¶ This feelin' inside has torn me apart ¶

¶ Lovin' slowly around my heart ¶

¶ Come and light me up when it gets dark ¶

¶ Oh it must be you ¶

¶ Oh it must be you ¶

¶ Oh it must be you ¶

(people laughing and chattering)

¶ Somethin's gettin' into you ¶

¶ Ooh ooh it must be you ¶

¶ Somethin's gettin' into me ¶

¶ Ooh ooh it must be you ¶

(upbeat Latin music)

(audience cheering and applauding)

(people chattering)

- Darling, it was just marvelous.

I don't know how you
got it together so fast.

- Panic, panic and desperation.

- (laughing) You know who
I adore is that Maria.

She is wonderful.

We'll definitely be using her next year.

So, whatever you do keep her happy.

- Yes, I intend to do just that.

- You know who's really gorgeous is Jade.

- Maybe, but I know the type.

She won't have those looks much longer

if she keeps burning
the candle at both ends.

- [Waiter] What can I get for you, Miss?

- We'll both have the lamb medium, please,

a couple of salads, and
vinegarette on the side.

- Certainly, sir.

- Think he'll cut it up
and feed it to her too?

- [Waiter] And for you, Miss?

- I'll have the whitefish please.

And what about you, Arnie?

Arnie?

- It's Andy.

- [Jade] Whatever.

- I'll have the filet mignon well done,

and where's your little boys' room?

- It's right through there, sir.

- Thanks, I'll be right back.

Don't go away.

- The little boys' room?

Where'd you find this guy,

the home for arrested development?

- You know me.

I just can't resist the combination

of a beautiful body and an empty mind.

- Hey, beauty isn't everything.

You know, some women appreciate a man

with a little wit and panache,

a certain je ne sais quoi.

- French women, no doubt?

Waiter, we'd like some wine please.

- No, we wouldn't, thank you.

Not with Mrs. Allison here.

- Spoilsport.

- Look, if you want a
shot at this contract,

you gotta start behaving yourself.

- All right.

From now on I promise that I'll get

at least two hours sleep a night.

How's that?

- You know, Jade, I don't understand you.

You got it all.

You're beautiful, smart.

You could make it.

So, why do you sabotage yourself?

- Now, here's my date.

Now, be nice.

- What am I gonna do, call him names?

The guy's a gorilla.

He killed me.

- I wish.

- [Andy] Hi.

- Hi.

- [Andy] How ya doin'?

- Oh, great.

- Good evening, Maria.

- Whatever it is, I didn't do it.

- No, I just thought
you might like to dance.

- I'm sorry.

I didn't know you could be human.

- You wanna come surf
with me this weekend?

- No, thank you, I don't surf.

- That's okay.

You can take pictures
of me and hold my towel.

- You're a fairly good dancer for a woman.

(Maria laughing)

I'm just joking.

- You're fairly funny for a man.

- Oh, thank you.

- [Maria] You're welcome.

- You know, I was just
speaking with Mrs. Allison.

She was remarking how much she likes you.

- (chuckling) You mean she
likes my skin or my muscle tone?

- Personally, I think it's
quite an accomplishment.

- You would.

- Thank you.

- You know, I shouldn't
be telling you this,

but you have a very good chance

of getting one of these
contracts next year.

It's an unbelievable opportunity.

I hope you appreciate that.

- Why do I sense

there's a bit of warning
in there somewhere?

- Well, I just hate to see you

blow it with this acting
business, you know what I mean?

- Blow it?

- Yeah, you know what I mean?

- Yeah, I know.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

- Wait a minute.

Wait a minute, Maria?

Maria.

Maria, Maria, wait a minute.

Do you know how many actors
in the Screen Actors Guild

actually made a living last year?

- I don't care.

- Well, let me tell you
somethin', girlfriend.

Out of 70,000 actors,

we're talkin' maybe 800, 900 at the tops.

The rest of 'em are what,
waitin' tables and selling shoes?

Is that the kind of lifestyle
you want for yourself?

- What makes you so sure

that I'm not gonna be one of
those eight or 900 people?

- Aw, you are so stubborn.

I just don't wanna see
a screw up your life

when you got a sure thing
starin' you right in the face.

- Screw up my life?

Brian, I believe that I have talent.

I would be screwing up my
life if I didn't go for it.

- What makes you think
that you've got talent?

(laughing)

- Talk about stubborn.

Look, my workshop meets on Tuesday nights

from eight to 11 at the
Actor's Theater in Hollywood.

Why don't you come be
a judge for yourself?

- All right, maybe I will.

- [Maria] Please do.

- Maria, dear, you were
wonderful in the commercial.

You have such marvelous muscle tone.

- Thank you, Mrs. Allison.

If you'll excuse me.

- No, I absolutely forbid it.

- It's too late.

I already put it all in large
position in copper futures.

- Copper futures?

What are copper futures?

- Look, Romella, I know what I'm doing.

- Oh, I am so angry with
you I could just smitt.

- Don't you mean spit?

- Fine, go ahead, make fun of my grammar,

but that don't stop me from seeing red.

And I will tell you one thing.

If you lose any of my money

I will throw you a big conniption fit.

And that is a warranty.

- Not warranty, that is a guarantee.

(footsteps echoing)

- Hart, come on, we're in public.

- Well, then, let's go to my place.

- No, I can't.

I have an eight o'clock
workout in the morning.

- You work too hard.

I mean it.

I mean, you're up at dawn every morning.

You exercise 'til you drop.

You starve yourself.

A girl like you should
be enjoying herself.

- I don't mind hard work,
and I like modeling.

It's a challenge.

- Well, it's only a challenge
because it's new to you.

It gets old fast, believe me.

The average model has got five good years.

She starts out working her tail off,

does an occasional catalog,
and her career's over by 30.

- Well, gee, Hart, don't sugarcoat it.

- I'm serious, Rosy.

You have such a sweetness about you.

I don't wanna see you change.

- [Rosy] I won't.

(boat horn sounding)

- What if you never had to work again?

What if you could do anything you wanted?

- I don't know.

I've always worked.

You're staring at me.

- That's because your beautiful.

(gentle piano music)

And you have a magical smile.

And I love you.

- You do?

- [Hart] From the moment you crashed

into the waiter at the club.

- Oh, please don't remind me.

- I'm serious.

I never thought I'd feel
this way about anybody,

and now that I do I'm not
gonna let you get away.

Rosanna Jean Campbell,

will you marry me?

(birds chirping)

(people chattering)

- Hi, remember me?

Willard Thurm, your future husband.

- Sorry, it doesn't ring a bell.

- So, it's our last day tomorrow.

- Hallelujah.

Now, at last I can get back to something

I'm really good at, full-time debauchery.

- So, I was thinking that
we should definitely go out

and have a date tonight.

You, me, us alone together
under the moonlight.

What do you say?

- I don't think so, Will.

- Why not?

The truth.

I can take it really.

- All right, you're not my type.

- Why?

Is it because I can read and write,

and I have a vocabulary
of more than nine words?

(laughing)

Come on.

You'd never know you liked caviar either

if you hadn't tried it the first time.

- [Romella] Well, I look
good, but look at Maria.

- Hey, they didn't even
use one photo of me.

- [Maria] Well, maybe yours
aren't done yet, Jade.

- What are these?

- These the proofs of the print ads.

- Oh, can I see?

- Yeah.

Rosy, is this your engagement ring?

- [Rosy] Yeah, it was
Hart's grandmother's.

- [Maria] It's gorgeous.

- His grandmother likes
the very big diamond.

(all laughing)

- No kidding.

You'd better take this
thing off before you swim,

or you'll sink like a stone.

- [Maria] Wait, let me see that.

- Ladies, break up the party.

Workout's in five minutes.

- What's up with him?

- I'll be right back.

Chris, wait.

So, I guess you heard I got engaged, huh?

- Yeah.

Congratulations really.

- Thanks.

Wait, are you okay?

I mean, you seem a little,
I dunno, upset or something.

- I am.

They denied my loan for the prop house.

- I'm sorry.

I wish there was something I could do.

- You know, well, don't sweat it.

I'll get the money somehow.

Workout's in five minutes.

(weights banging)

- Romella, I am so glad
the summer's almost over,

and I can forget about this stupid job

and get on with my life.

- But what about the competition

for the fabulous Saltaire
modeling contract?

Aren't you longing to know

if you'll be exploited
next year for big bucks?

- No, money really isn't
that important to me.

As long as I can pay my rent,

and I can afford my acting workshops,

I mean, what else do I
need the money for it?

- Maria, no offense,
but you're a big cook.

- I love it.

Maria's the one with the
best chance at the contract.

So, naturally, she's the
one who doesn't care.

Ain't life grand?

- Why do you think Maria
has a better chance?

- Haven't you noticed how Brian

is always cozying up to her lately?

Brian never cozies up to anyone
unless he needs something.

Mark my words.

She's gonna be offered the contract,

and I'm gonna be out on
my indebted little behind.

- Wait, you never know.

It's not over 'til it's over, right?

- Ah, who cares?

I never had a chance
at the lousy contract.

I'm glad I didn't knock myself out.

- I can't believe you.

You don't even know how gorgeous you are.

- Wanna see something funny?

No, it's not orca the killer whale.

That's me eight years ago
and 38 pounds heavier.

- This doesn't even look like you.

- Yeah, that's because
after I lost all the weight,

my mother took me off

to the best plastic
surgeon in Beverly Hills.

And she said right in front of me,

"Dr. Whitewood, we're desperate.

"Can't you start over again?"

My mother was one of those
incredibly beautiful women

whose whole thing in life is
being and staying beautiful.

Made her crazy to have this dumpy kid.

You know, the truth is, is
that when I look in the mirror

all I still see is what's wrong.

- You know what I see
when I look in the mirror?

I see a really big clutz.

(sighing)

(people chattering)

(gentle piano music)

- So, my parents are
flying in Tuesday night,

and mother's friend Catherine McCormick

is throwing a big luncheon
for us at the Bel Air Hotel.

Here, try this.

- It's good.

I hope your parents like me.

- Don't worry, they'll love you.

Wear that blue Chanel suit I bought you

with the white silk blouse.

So, that's Wednesday at noon.

- Wednesday?

I have a shoot on Wednesday.

Oh, I don't believe this.

- Well, call Brian and
tell him you can't make it.

I'm sure they can find
someone to replace you.

- No, I can't.

It's the last shoot, and it's
my last chance to be seen.

I'm borderline as it is.

- Roseanna, now, this is very important.

How would it look if my fiance doesn't

show up to her own engagement party?

And I don't want you
working anymore anyway.

- But.
- Shh shh.

From here on in I'll
take care of everything.

We'll call Brian after dinner.

Now, I have a little surprise.

- Paris?

- We'll have a small
ceremony the 16th of August

and Europe for three months, okay?

Darling, other fork.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

(mellow big band music)

(people chattering)

- Who are these people?

- I don't know, but whoever they are

I hope I'm this happy when I'm their age.

- So, we're crashing Jack
and Ev's anniversary party?

- Yeah.

I wanted to bring you someplace where I'd

definitely be the most
handsome guy in the whole room.

- You're nuts.

- Yeah, but never boring.

- For you, it was as if
nothing had happened.

I was exactly the same, your little lark,

your doll that you'd have to
handle with double care because

I turned out to be so brittle and frail.

In that instant, in that instant,

it dawned on me that for eight years

I've been living here with a stranger

and that I even conceived three children.

God, I can't stand the thought of it.

It makes me want to tear myself to bits.

(phone keys clicking)

- Bill, Brian Rutledge here.

(laughing) Yeah, it has
been a long time, hasn't it?

(laughing) Well, thanks, thanks.

No, actually I'm doing all the stuff

for Saltaire Swimwear of California.

Uh huh, uh uh, well, thank you.

Actually, that's
indirectly why I'm calling.

I understand that you're
directing a motion picture.

(upbeat trumpet music)

(people clapping)

("Hava Nagila")

(singing "Hava Nagila")

(Jade laughing)

- What's so funny?

- Nothing, just you.

Happy birthday, Will.

- It's not my, birthday.

- Let's just say your
birthday's early this year.

(light clicking)

- Ah (chuckling).

Ah, Jade, don't you think we
should talk about this first?

- Why?

- Why? (chuckling)

Why, well, because this morning
I wasn't even your type.

- [Jade] So, I changed my mind.

- You did.

And, and, and what made
you change your mind?

- (laughing) What else?

The way you Horah.

- No, wait, Jade.

Wait, now, wait a minute, wait a minute.

Seriously here, look, look, I am not some

stud you can bring back
here and have your way with.

I mean it.

I see how you treat those guys.

You go out with them once.

You can't even remember their names.

I really care about you.

(Jade laughing)

I wanna know that this is more
than some one night stand.

- I don't believe this.

You have been hitting on me
nonstop for the past six weeks,

and now, what, you wanna go steady first?

- Jade, I see what a tough case you are.

You don't let anything touch you.

Every week it's a different guy

or a new car or new clothes.

I don't wanna be just another
one of your distractions.

(gentle piano music)

I need to know that this
is gonna mean somethin'.

- Look, if we're gonna
analyze this to death,

let's just forget about it, okay?

- Okay.

Whatever you say.

- Will, wait a minute.

Where are you going?

- If you're ever ready for
anything real, give me a call.

- Fine.

Who needs it?

- Come in.

Hi.

- Hi.

So, it's true.

You're packin' it in for some guy.

- He's not some guy, Chris.

I love him.

- Come on, Rosy.

How can you love this guy?

You barely know him.

- You don't know anything about this.

He's the nicest man I've ever met.

He takes me places, and he buys me things.

- And he orders for you.

He tells you what to read, what to wear.

Rosy, if this guy loves you so much,

why is he trying to change you?

- Maybe I wanna change.

Maybe I'm lucky that a
man of Hart's intelligence

and position would even look twice at me.

- You know what I think?

I think you're scared.

You're scared you're not good enough

so you're takin' the easy way out.

- You know what I think?

I think you're jealous.

- Jealous?

- [Rosy] Yeah.

- Why, because I asked you out once?

Don't flatter yourself.

- If you're not jealous,

then why do you care so much what I do?

- Because I thought you had guts.

I admired you.

I guess I was wrong, huh?

And you were right.

It's none of my business.

So, if you wanna go through
the rest of your life

wondering if you ever could've made it,

that's just fine with me.

- Fine.

(gentle piano music)

(door banging)

(car horn honking)

- Oh, oh, God.

- Willard?

We're ready to shoot
this water skiing stuff.

Is she here yet?

- Ah, no.

- No?
- No.

(yelling)

- Excuse me, can any of you water ski?

No?

Oh, fine, well, we're gonna
have to skip the thing again.

- I'll do it.

- [Brian] What are you doing here?

I thought you quit.

- I couldn't.

I gotta see this thing through.

I've been practicing.

Come on, Brian, what do you got to lose?

- Okay.

(upbeat rock music)

¶ Sometimes you win ¶

¶ Sometimes you lose ¶

¶ You still gotta play the game ¶

- That's it, Rosy, just relax.

Bend your knees, yeah.

All right, Rosy, now smile, smile.

Yeah, way to go, Rosy.

- Bob, yes, sirree, Bob.

Lookin' good out there.

- She sure is.

- Yes, sir.

- Brian, sorry I'm late.

You wouldn't believe
the day that I've had.

- It's all right, dear, we got it covered.

- Brian, please.

- It's all right, doll.

I'm a happy man.

We got it covered.

Okay, Rosy.

(laughing)

- Yeah.

¶ I need breathe in ¶

(Rosy cheering)

- Yeah.

I'm sorry.

Really, I am.

And you're the most wonderful, generous,

and sophisticated man I've ever known,

but when I'm around you,

I just feel like I'm never gonna catch up.

- [Hart] Well, that's ridiculous.

- [Rosy] Well, maybe it is,
but it's the way I feel.

The truth is that I realized

that I'm too young for marriage.

I'm just not ready.

I'm only 19,

and there's still so many
things that I wanna do.

- [Hart] Well, like, like what?

- [Rosy] Well, like,
go to college for one.

- Well, that's fine.

I'd be happy to put you through school.

- No, I can't.

I need to know if I can make it on my own.

Until I have my own
identity and know who I am,

marriage couldn't ever work.

(seagulls calling)

- For a girl with no identity,

how did you get to be so smart?

(gentle piano music)

- [Rosy] I'll never forget you, Hart.

- [Willard] Well, I'd like to
be able to use all of them.

- [Mrs. Allison] Can't afford to.

Brian, why don't you run
the commercial again,

and we'll decide.

(phone ringing)

(beeping)

(upbeat '80s music)

(roaring)

(roaring)

(people chattering)

(phone ringing)

- Okay, gang, we're ready.

(typewriter clattering)

- First of all.

- Sorry.

- First of all, I'd like to say

that you've all worked out

infinitely better than we had hoped,

but after serious consideration

the following three models
will be awarded the contracts.

Scott Clark.

Maria Detney.

Rosy Campbell.

Everyone else, thank you and good luck.

(kiss smacking)

- Congratulations.

- Oh, thank you.

I'm sorry.

I couldn't have made it
through this without you.

- Let me.

- Well, darlin', are you surprised?

- Yeah, yeah, I can't believe it.

- Well, you earned it.

It's not bad for a kid I almost fired.

- Thanks.

Oh, I got somethin' else for ya.

Another surprise.

Feast your eyes.

- $25,000, what is this for?

- The magazine called.

They wanna use you for
their swimsuit issue.

- Oh, I can't believe it.

I gotta call my mom.

I'll be right back, thanks, bye.

(Brian laughing)

- [Maria] Brian?

- Yeah.

- Can I talk to you for a minute?

- Sure, why not?

Go. (laughing)

- I can't accept the contract
because I got a part.

- Well, good for you.

Now, I hope it's a great one.

- Well, it's the lead,

but, now, promise you're not gonna laugh.

It's about a beauty pageant,

and I spend half the movie
in a swimsuit. (laughing)

- (laughing) You see now you
can't escape your destiny.

- Oh, Brian, thank you.

The director told me that you called him,

and I can't believe you did that.

- You're a talent.

You deserve it.

And once every other full moon,

I turn it into a nice
guy for a night or two.

(phone ringing)

(typewriter clacking)

- Jade, I'm sorry.

- It's my own fault.

Will you come visit me in Sing Sing?

- Sure, I'll bring you a
cake with a file in it.

- Thanks.

(sniffling)

Wanna hear something funny, Will?

You're the first guy
who's ever turned me down.

- You know, I've been thinkin' about that.

What a fool I was.

I made a terrible mistake.

- No, I'm glad you did.

I am a hard case.

I have been ever since my dad
left my mom when I was 12.

I have never had a real
relationship with anyone before.

It's just too scary.

- Hey, I'm scared too.

- Romella, may we speak
with you for a moment?

- Good news, dear.

Maria's dropped out.

So, we'll be using you
next year after all.

- Well, thank you very much,

but I will be going back to Hungary.

- Darling, you can't be serious.

If you stay here, you can
go back a millionaire,

at least for a Hungarian.

- Yes, but I'm not model.

I am entrepreneur.

Scott has made for me

giant slather in commodities market.

I will go back to Hungary and
start my own swimsuit company.

- [Mrs. Allison] Well, you
little capitalist, you.

- Mrs. Allison, thank you very much.

I'm only hoping that one day I can be

as powerful and as cutthroat as you.

- You know, dear, it might be a good idea

for you to invest in some English lessons.

- Thank you very much.

(phone ringing)

(phone banging)

- You know what?

- What?

- Today I lost my job.

I'm being sued for a small fortune,

and I've never been this happy ever.

- You know what?

- What?

- If I died right this minute,

I could honestly say that
I have lived a full life.

(both laughing)

(phone ringing)

- Go away.

Nobody's home.

- [Brian] Jade, it's Brian.

- Oh, hi, Brian.

What's up?

- [Brian] Well, Maria
couldn't accept the contract

and neither could Romella.

So you get it by default, hey.

- You're kidding?

That's fantastic.

- [Brian] Before you get too excited,

Mrs. Allison only wants you
on a month-to-month basis.

Now, listen, I gotta tell ya,

she's a little concerned
about your attitude problem.

- I don't care if she wants
to be on a day-to-day basis.

I promise you, Brian, from now
on, I'll be the model model.

(phone banging)

You know what?

- What?

- You're bringing me good luck already.

- Terrific.

Now, where were we?

- Hmm.

- Mmm.

(crickets chirping)

(knocking on door)

- I'm coming.

Coming, coming.

Hi.
- Hi.

(laughing)

- Well, come on in.
- Thanks.

- So?

- So, local girl does good.

- Yes.

Rosy, I knew you could do it.

I knew it.

I knew that.

This is great.

- Yeah, you knew before I knew.

Listen, Chris, I wanna say thanks.

You made me believe I could do it,

and I want you to have this.

- [Chris] What is it?

- [Rosy] It's my bonus
check from the magazine.

I want you to use it
to open your prop shop.

- Rosy, I can't accept this.

- Oh, stop it.

I'm not giving it to you.

It's a loan.

You believed in me, and I believe in you.

Plus, it's a very sound
investment, and I insist.

- All right, but only if
you let me pay you back

whatever the interest rate is.

- Fine.

- Okay, fine.

Fine, okay, then we'll make it legit.

We'll draw up papers and
everything first thing tomorrow.

- Okay.

I'm not too worried about it.

(crickets chirping)

- And there's one other thing.

(gentle piano music)

- If you think that's gonna get
you a break on the interest,

you can forget it.

(upbeat country music)

(people chattering)

- [Jim] I swear, I swear
she used to work here.

- No way, no way.

- I'm tellin' ya, it's true.

She was the worst waitress
I ever have (laughing).

Was a nice kid though, really nice kid.

(upbeat rock music)