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1
00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:11,309
Oh, uh, Dad.
2
00:00:11,344 --> 00:00:13,078
It's not here yet.
3
00:00:13,113 --> 00:00:15,982
How did you... You've been
yakking about it for weeks.
4
00:00:16,017 --> 00:00:16,983
Your new blazer's coming.
5
00:00:17,484 --> 00:00:19,185
It's Italian,
it's hand-stitched,
6
00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:20,852
it cost more money
than my first car.
7
00:00:20,887 --> 00:00:23,072
Yes, but it's made from
very expensive material.
8
00:00:23,107 --> 00:00:25,258
They have to find exactly
the right kind of goat.
9
00:00:25,293 --> 00:00:26,624
Looks like they did.
10
00:00:26,659 --> 00:00:28,827
Good morning,
Dr. Crane.
11
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,096
I made you a
special breakfast.
12
00:00:30,131 --> 00:00:31,596
Why, thank you,
Daphne.
13
00:00:31,631 --> 00:00:34,401
After all, blazer day
comes but once a year.
14
00:00:35,769 --> 00:00:37,637
The doorman said he was
on his way up with it.
15
00:00:37,672 --> 00:00:39,639
I wonder what's keeping him.
16
00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:42,108
Regan.
17
00:00:42,143 --> 00:00:43,041
Frasier.
18
00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:45,443
Long time no see.
19
00:00:45,478 --> 00:00:47,713
Yes, yes, it has been.
20
00:00:47,748 --> 00:00:49,914
I think the last time
21
00:00:49,949 --> 00:00:52,385
was when you came over
with that bottle of wine.
22
00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:54,219
Oh, right, right.
23
00:00:54,254 --> 00:00:55,655
And I met your
charming boyfriend.
24
00:00:55,690 --> 00:00:59,024
Scott.
25
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,992
And he's not
my boyfriend anymore.
26
00:01:01,027 --> 00:01:03,496
Oh, well, he wasn't really
all that charming.
27
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,537
Well, it was nice seeing
you again, Frasier.
28
00:01:10,572 --> 00:01:11,838
Likewise.
29
00:01:20,146 --> 00:01:23,015
Isn't that interesting?
30
00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:25,850
Just ran into Regan.
31
00:01:25,885 --> 00:01:29,122
It seems she's not seeing
that Scott anymore.
32
00:01:29,157 --> 00:01:30,955
What, the ballplayer?
Is she nuts?
33
00:01:30,990 --> 00:01:33,726
He had money, looks,
the whole package.
34
00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:35,794
Dad, let him go.
35
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,931
Are you going to ask her out?
36
00:01:37,966 --> 00:01:39,697
I don't know.
37
00:01:39,732 --> 00:01:42,735
Every time I've had the chance
to get close to Regan,
38
00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:46,106
it seems I end up
looking ridiculous.
39
00:01:46,141 --> 00:01:47,906
Still...
40
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,442
she did make a point
of letting me know
41
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:52,410
that she was single again.
42
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:54,948
Perhaps she's hinting
for another ride
43
00:01:55,381 --> 00:01:57,849
on the Frasier-go-round.
44
00:01:57,884 --> 00:02:00,236
Now, if we could just figure out
45
00:02:00,271 --> 00:02:02,589
why you always look ridiculous.
46
00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:05,990
Please, you're my last chance.
47
00:02:06,025 --> 00:02:08,528
Couldn't you...? All right,
no, it's okay, I understand.
48
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:10,096
I understand.
Don't worry about it. Bye.
49
00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:11,996
Problem?
50
00:02:12,031 --> 00:02:13,316
Yeah, it's my
bachelor party.
51
00:02:13,351 --> 00:02:14,726
My best man
can't arrange it.
52
00:02:14,761 --> 00:02:16,067
I'm having a hell
of a time
53
00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:17,502
trying to find
somebody to fill in.
54
00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:19,038
Well, Donny, if you're
looking for someone
55
00:02:19,073 --> 00:02:20,607
to throw you an
appropriate shindig,
56
00:02:20,642 --> 00:02:22,909
I'd be willing
to volunteer.
57
00:02:22,944 --> 00:02:24,945
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
58
00:02:24,980 --> 00:02:26,647
Thank you, no.
It's okay.
59
00:02:26,682 --> 00:02:28,165
I just don't
want to impose.
60
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:29,649
It's no trouble
at all, really.
61
00:02:29,684 --> 00:02:31,084
No, no, no, no. No.
62
00:02:31,119 --> 00:02:32,450
It's fine, uh, really.
63
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:33,952
Thanks for the offer,
though, Frasier.
64
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,322
I don't think we're talking
about the same kind of party.
65
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,258
Donny, if you're
letting my reputation
66
00:02:38,293 --> 00:02:40,125
as an aesthete
cloud your judgment,
67
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,128
I assure you I am just
one of the guys...
68
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:46,666
capable of getting down and
dirty with the best of them.
69
00:02:46,701 --> 00:02:48,168
Your jacket, Dr. Crane.
70
00:02:48,203 --> 00:02:49,634
Oh, dear God!
71
00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:50,635
You never
fold cashmere!
72
00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:52,472
You'll misdirect
the nap. Get out!
73
00:02:54,574 --> 00:02:55,942
Donny, give it
some thought, hmm?
74
00:03:01,581 --> 00:03:03,366
Morning, Roz.
Hey, Frasier.
75
00:03:03,401 --> 00:03:05,151
Help me decide
something.
76
00:03:05,186 --> 00:03:07,118
All right.
77
00:03:07,153 --> 00:03:08,655
I'm thinking about
getting my eyes done.
78
00:03:08,690 --> 00:03:10,156
It's a little
expensive, but...
79
00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:11,089
Now, now, Roz,
80
00:03:11,124 --> 00:03:12,557
cosmetic surgery
is a drastic step.
81
00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:14,594
If you're worried about
those bags under your eyes,
82
00:03:14,629 --> 00:03:16,830
why don't you try
just a different concealer.
83
00:03:16,865 --> 00:03:19,032
Perhaps a good night's sleep
once in a while.
84
00:03:19,067 --> 00:03:20,431
I meant the laser procedure
85
00:03:20,466 --> 00:03:23,803
so I could see
without my contacts.
86
00:03:24,637 --> 00:03:25,970
Uh, my usual, please.
87
00:03:26,005 --> 00:03:28,508
I just saw the most
incredible thing.
88
00:03:28,543 --> 00:03:29,841
You will not believe it.
89
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,578
What is it? You have
to see it for yourself.
90
00:03:31,613 --> 00:03:32,746
Mere words cannot...
91
00:03:32,781 --> 00:03:33,845
Ooh, new jacket?
92
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:34,897
Yes, just came today.
93
00:03:34,932 --> 00:03:35,880
That's nice stitching.
94
00:03:35,915 --> 00:03:36,899
Thank you. Christophe. No, really?
95
00:03:36,934 --> 00:03:38,159
Is something
wrong with the nap?
96
00:03:38,194 --> 00:03:39,385
Oh, my God,
is it that obvious?
97
00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:40,420
Would you
knock it off?
98
00:03:40,455 --> 00:03:41,386
What is so amazing?
99
00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:42,822
All right, come here,
come here, look.
100
00:03:44,757 --> 00:03:46,258
Come here. All right.
101
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:47,725
You see that rotund woman
102
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:49,262
coming out of
Choc Full of Donuts?
103
00:03:49,297 --> 00:03:50,528
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
104
00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:51,948
Watch. Before
she gets to her car,
105
00:03:51,983 --> 00:03:53,333
she will finish
that bear claw,
106
00:03:53,368 --> 00:03:55,569
and then go back in.
107
00:03:55,604 --> 00:03:57,735
This is herthirdtime.
108
00:03:57,770 --> 00:03:59,704
That's what you brought
us over here for?
109
00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:03,042
To gawk as some poor woman's
struggle with junk food?
110
00:04:03,077 --> 00:04:04,711
Big deal, so
she's overweight.
111
00:04:04,746 --> 00:04:06,346
You don't need
to point it out.
112
00:04:06,381 --> 00:04:07,247
It's rude.
113
00:04:07,282 --> 00:04:08,449
It's childish.
114
00:04:08,484 --> 00:04:09,616
It's Maris.
115
00:04:13,119 --> 00:04:15,587
No way.
116
00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:17,123
Dear God,
are you sure?
117
00:04:17,158 --> 00:04:18,423
I'm positive.
118
00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:19,826
It's hard to believe
that's the same frail woman
119
00:04:19,861 --> 00:04:21,292
who once sprained her wrist
120
00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:23,546
from having too much dip
on a cracker.
121
00:04:23,581 --> 00:04:25,424
Maris was always
chubby as a child.
122
00:04:25,459 --> 00:04:27,267
Her whole life
she's been obsessed
123
00:04:27,302 --> 00:04:28,786
with keeping weight off.
124
00:04:28,821 --> 00:04:30,235
Something
must've snapped.
125
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,522
Literally. When she saw me,
she swallowed
126
00:04:32,557 --> 00:04:34,774
and her necklace exploded
from the pressure.
127
00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:38,009
Look, look,
128
00:04:38,044 --> 00:04:40,378
there she goes...
back for more.
129
00:04:40,413 --> 00:04:42,749
You know, when I last
saw her at Christmas,
130
00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:45,752
she was her
usual tiny self.
131
00:04:45,787 --> 00:04:47,151
Wait, Niles,
132
00:04:47,186 --> 00:04:48,553
wasn't that about the time
133
00:04:48,588 --> 00:04:50,089
you started dating
her plastic surgeon?
134
00:04:50,124 --> 00:04:52,058
Actually, it was.
135
00:04:52,592 --> 00:04:54,093
You think that could
have triggered
136
00:04:54,128 --> 00:04:55,595
some sort of binge?
Well...
137
00:04:55,630 --> 00:04:57,028
Well, this isn't
going to help.
138
00:04:57,063 --> 00:04:59,182
Mel and I are in the
society page today.
139
00:04:59,217 --> 00:05:01,266
It's our picture at
the symphony benefit.
140
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,102
I shudder to think how Maris
will react to that.
141
00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:05,038
You know how petty and jealous
she can get.
142
00:05:05,073 --> 00:05:07,472
They never take a photo of me,
143
00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:09,440
and I'm in
the Conductor's Circle.
144
00:05:09,475 --> 00:05:12,443
Well, she moved next door
to the Italian deli.
145
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:15,481
The guy just took the two-foot
salami out of the window.
146
00:05:15,516 --> 00:05:17,949
I can't face her now.
147
00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,485
That salami string
should keep her busy
148
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:20,987
until I can get to my car.
149
00:05:21,022 --> 00:05:21,786
Niles...
150
00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:23,655
Hey, is that Niles
in the paper?
151
00:05:23,690 --> 00:05:25,625
Yes. He just happened
to have a copy with him.
152
00:05:25,660 --> 00:05:27,560
As if anyone cares about
such trivial matters.
153
00:05:27,595 --> 00:05:28,793
Oh, yeah, right.
154
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,061
This is eating you up.
155
00:05:30,096 --> 00:05:33,099
You live for this
hoity-toity crap.
156
00:05:33,134 --> 00:05:34,568
Thank you.
I certainly do not.
157
00:05:34,603 --> 00:05:35,967
Why does everyone
think that?
158
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:38,404
You know, just this morning
Donny said I was too fussy
159
00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:40,271
to throw him
a bachelor party.
160
00:05:40,306 --> 00:05:42,140
Well, you do give off
kind of a fussy vibe.
161
00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:44,477
You know, there are other
sides to my personality.
162
00:05:44,512 --> 00:05:45,710
I remember back
in my Boston days,
163
00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:48,247
I had a regular bar
and a regular barstool.
164
00:05:48,282 --> 00:05:49,614
I even had a tab.
165
00:05:49,649 --> 00:05:53,453
Well, if you go back,
you should try having a beer.
166
00:05:53,488 --> 00:05:55,856
Oh, gosh, you know, maybe...
167
00:05:55,891 --> 00:05:58,224
maybe I have become stuffier.
168
00:05:58,259 --> 00:05:59,590
The highlight of my week
169
00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:01,961
was the arrival
of my hand-tailored coat.
170
00:06:01,996 --> 00:06:03,828
Maybe it's time
I loosened up a bit.
171
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:06,833
Tried to tone down the
whole fuddy-duddy image.
172
00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:11,302
Hello, Donny?
It's Frasier.
173
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:13,339
Listen, I would really
like to throw
174
00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:15,258
that bachelor party for you.
175
00:06:15,293 --> 00:06:17,143
No, no, I assure you
I know
176
00:06:17,178 --> 00:06:18,543
what goes on at one.
177
00:06:18,578 --> 00:06:20,580
Yes, I'm quite, quite qualified.
178
00:06:20,615 --> 00:06:22,046
No, really, I promise you
179
00:06:22,081 --> 00:06:24,549
a night of such
unrepentant debauchery
180
00:06:24,584 --> 00:06:28,588
that the mere memory will
delight you in your old age.
181
00:06:28,623 --> 00:06:30,590
That is, if you should
survive the night.
182
00:06:32,091 --> 00:06:33,976
Think I'm overselling it a bit?
183
00:06:34,011 --> 00:06:35,453
Maybe a tad.
Yeah, all right.
184
00:06:35,488 --> 00:06:36,896
That's great.
Oh, great, great.
185
00:06:36,931 --> 00:06:38,162
Thanks, Donny.
186
00:06:38,197 --> 00:06:39,464
I'll tell you
what I'm going to do,
187
00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:41,501
I'm going to go out
and find you a stripper.
188
00:06:41,536 --> 00:06:44,003
Maybe even more than one.
189
00:06:44,038 --> 00:06:45,004
You bet.
190
00:06:47,473 --> 00:06:48,674
Strippers, huh?
191
00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:49,841
You betcha.
192
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:53,578
A couple of real
red-hot mamas.
193
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:55,882
You don't even know where
to find one, do you?
194
00:06:55,917 --> 00:06:57,750
Not a clue.
195
00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:23,209
Damn.
196
00:07:23,244 --> 00:07:25,495
Damn!
197
00:07:25,530 --> 00:07:27,712
Damn.
198
00:07:27,747 --> 00:07:31,250
Open, damn you!
199
00:07:31,285 --> 00:07:32,084
Frasier?
200
00:07:32,985 --> 00:07:34,454
Regan.
201
00:07:35,888 --> 00:07:38,191
Well, this is certainly my lucky
day running into you twice.
202
00:07:38,226 --> 00:07:42,628
Gosh, I guess
this must look a little strange.
203
00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:44,829
Really, it's none
of my business.
204
00:07:44,864 --> 00:07:46,699
No, no, actually, it's
quite an amusing story.
205
00:07:46,734 --> 00:07:49,402
I was just getting
aSeattle Timeshere
206
00:07:49,437 --> 00:07:52,071
and I got my coat
stuck in the machine.
207
00:07:52,106 --> 00:07:53,773
That's not theSeattle Times.
208
00:07:53,808 --> 00:07:54,574
Hmm?
209
00:07:56,075 --> 00:07:59,078
Dear God, they should label
these things more clearly.
210
00:07:59,113 --> 00:08:01,481
This is some sort of a smut rag.
211
00:08:01,516 --> 00:08:03,850
It was nice seeing you.
Regan...
212
00:08:03,885 --> 00:08:07,887
Regan...
213
00:08:10,857 --> 00:08:12,108
Well, if you get any in,
214
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:13,359
could you
please call me?
215
00:08:13,394 --> 00:08:15,259
Thank you.
216
00:08:15,294 --> 00:08:16,796
Gosh, I'm off
to one hell of a start
217
00:08:16,831 --> 00:08:18,262
with this bachelor party.
218
00:08:18,297 --> 00:08:19,799
First, the debacle with Regan,
219
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:20,765
now Syd's Novelty Shop
220
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:24,303
is completely out
of naughty coasters.
221
00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:26,272
Oh, will you stop moping.
222
00:08:26,307 --> 00:08:29,175
It'll all work ass.
223
00:08:29,210 --> 00:08:30,842
What?
224
00:08:30,877 --> 00:08:33,246
For God's sake,
give me that!
225
00:08:33,281 --> 00:08:35,580
What the hell
are you doing?
226
00:08:35,615 --> 00:08:37,016
Honey, if your
head hurts,
227
00:08:37,051 --> 00:08:38,168
we don't have to go.
228
00:08:38,203 --> 00:08:39,285
No, no.
I'll be fine.
229
00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:40,251
All right.
230
00:08:40,286 --> 00:08:42,288
Dr. Crane, I just want
to tell you how happy I am
231
00:08:42,323 --> 00:08:43,789
you're throwing
Donny's bachelor party.
232
00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:44,790
Oh, well, there,
233
00:08:44,825 --> 00:08:46,224
you see?
234
00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:47,091
At least someone thinks
235
00:08:47,126 --> 00:08:48,461
I'm capable of throwing
a proper...
236
00:08:48,496 --> 00:08:49,427
A nice, low-key party
237
00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:51,297
just like my honey-bunny
insisted.
238
00:08:51,332 --> 00:08:52,563
Honestly,
239
00:08:52,598 --> 00:08:54,600
why men have to
celebrate getting married
240
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:56,035
by having
bouncing bosoms
241
00:08:56,070 --> 00:08:57,436
shoved in
their faces...
242
00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:58,437
Yeah. Just...
243
00:09:00,439 --> 00:09:01,906
If I know Dr. Crane,
244
00:09:01,941 --> 00:09:03,407
your party will be over
by 9:30.
245
00:09:03,442 --> 00:09:06,445
Oh, we could all go out
for dinner afterwards.
246
00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:09,649
Oh, yeah,
that'd be swell, honey.
247
00:09:09,684 --> 00:09:11,918
Gosh, you know,
if Daphne is so down
248
00:09:11,953 --> 00:09:14,118
on this whole
bachelor party idea,
249
00:09:14,153 --> 00:09:15,871
maybe I should throw
a more sedate one.
250
00:09:15,906 --> 00:09:17,555
I don't want to get Donny
in trouble.
251
00:09:17,590 --> 00:09:20,026
Listen, your job is to give him
the party he wants.
252
00:09:20,061 --> 00:09:22,779
Everything else
is between them.
253
00:09:22,814 --> 00:09:25,498
It's absolutely
none of your boobs.
254
00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:33,272
Give me that!
255
00:09:33,307 --> 00:09:35,274
Stop that.
256
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:42,079
Oh.
257
00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:43,482
Frasier Crane?
258
00:09:43,517 --> 00:09:44,782
Yes?
259
00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:48,686
I'm looking into a report
of vandalism...
260
00:09:48,721 --> 00:09:53,225
of a newspaper vending machine
on Euclid Avenue.
261
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:54,243
Does that sound familiar?
262
00:09:54,278 --> 00:09:55,192
Well, I-I may
have been
263
00:09:55,227 --> 00:09:57,980
in the area earlier
today, but, um...
264
00:09:58,015 --> 00:10:00,733
Somebody on the
scene recognized you
265
00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:02,066
as the perpetrator.
266
00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:04,403
Are you aware of the
penalty for vandalism?
267
00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:06,203
Uh-oh. Well, I... I may have
268
00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:07,505
dented the machine
a little, but...
269
00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:10,443
Frasier Crane, you have
the right to remain...
270
00:10:10,478 --> 00:10:12,276
aroused.
271
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:15,179
Anything you see,
272
00:10:15,214 --> 00:10:19,385
can and will be
rubbed against you.
273
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,073
She's a stripper!
274
00:10:24,108 --> 00:10:25,734
I get it, Dad!
275
00:10:25,769 --> 00:10:27,325
Thank you.
276
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:28,826
Thank you, Officer.
277
00:10:28,861 --> 00:10:31,364
I- I knew that Daphne
was going to be gone
278
00:10:31,399 --> 00:10:32,663
most of the afternoon,
279
00:10:32,698 --> 00:10:34,498
so I figured I'd help you out.
280
00:10:34,533 --> 00:10:36,035
Boy, you hire her
for Donny's party,
281
00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:38,004
he'll put you in his will.
282
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:40,304
So...
283
00:10:40,339 --> 00:10:41,140
do I get the job?
284
00:10:41,175 --> 00:10:42,540
Well, you...
285
00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:44,977
you certainly seem qualified...
overqualified.
286
00:10:45,945 --> 00:10:47,179
What's going on?
287
00:10:47,214 --> 00:10:48,412
Oh, Daphne!
288
00:10:48,447 --> 00:10:51,450
Oh, hello, I-I...
this is, uh...
289
00:10:51,485 --> 00:10:55,154
Officer Nasty, uh...
290
00:10:56,822 --> 00:10:58,857
She's, uh, leaving
the police force,
291
00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:00,893
and, uh, I'm thinking
of hiring her
292
00:11:00,928 --> 00:11:01,592
as the housekeeper.
293
00:11:01,627 --> 00:11:03,094
You see,
once you marry Donny,
294
00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:04,997
you'll still be Dad's
physical therapist
295
00:11:05,032 --> 00:11:06,564
of course, but
we'll need someone
296
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,399
around here to do
the chores, won't we?
297
00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:10,436
Weren't you supposed to
be out with Donny today?
298
00:11:10,471 --> 00:11:12,438
Yeah, I was, but I've got
a splitting headache.
299
00:11:12,473 --> 00:11:13,804
Oh.
300
00:11:13,839 --> 00:11:15,841
So, how long have you been
on the force?
301
00:11:15,876 --> 00:11:16,807
Uh, you know, uh,
302
00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:18,844
I was just about
to-to show the officer
303
00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:20,846
around the house
and, uh, discuss terms.
304
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,850
All right, it was nice meeting
you, Officer Nasty.
305
00:11:24,885 --> 00:11:26,152
Yes.
306
00:11:29,288 --> 00:11:31,457
Don't tell me
to calm down!
307
00:11:31,492 --> 00:11:33,626
It's a complete
disaster.
308
00:11:33,661 --> 00:11:34,592
She'll ruin me!
309
00:11:34,627 --> 00:11:35,861
What's going on?
Oh, it's Maris.
310
00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:37,061
She saw the picture
of us today,
311
00:11:37,096 --> 00:11:39,098
and she's determined
to take it out on Mel.
312
00:11:39,133 --> 00:11:41,101
Yes. She's telling everyone
313
00:11:41,136 --> 00:11:43,034
that I caused her weight gain
314
00:11:43,069 --> 00:11:45,504
by nicking her thyroid
during a neck tuck.
315
00:11:45,539 --> 00:11:49,206
I've already had
three cancellations.
316
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:51,577
She never thinks about
anybody but herself.
317
00:11:51,612 --> 00:11:52,912
Daphne, get me
a cup of tea.
318
00:11:54,747 --> 00:11:57,048
Actually, I have a bit
of a headache.
319
00:11:57,083 --> 00:11:58,951
Oh, you could be coming
down with something.
320
00:11:58,986 --> 00:12:00,851
Wash your hands first.
321
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:04,090
Darling, you have got
to calm down.
322
00:12:04,125 --> 00:12:05,322
Your shoulders
are so tense.
323
00:12:05,357 --> 00:12:07,326
Oh, you know, Daphne gives
a wonderful massage.
324
00:12:07,361 --> 00:12:09,560
That might be
just the thing for you.
325
00:12:09,595 --> 00:12:12,164
Actually, I was
planning on taking a nap.
326
00:12:12,199 --> 00:12:14,083
Oh, good, so
you're not busy.
327
00:12:14,118 --> 00:12:15,477
Shall we do it
in your room?
328
00:12:15,512 --> 00:12:16,924
Look, you two
run along.
329
00:12:16,959 --> 00:12:18,302
I'll take care
of the tea.
330
00:12:18,337 --> 00:12:19,839
I really appreciate
this, Daphne.
331
00:12:19,874 --> 00:12:21,640
You're welcome,
Dr. Crane.
332
00:12:21,675 --> 00:12:22,908
Hey, Niles.
333
00:12:22,943 --> 00:12:23,874
What?
334
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:26,779
Guess what
your brother's doing.
335
00:12:26,814 --> 00:12:29,699
Pressing his new blazer?
336
00:12:29,734 --> 00:12:32,585
Yeah. Against a stripper.
337
00:12:32,620 --> 00:12:33,820
What?
338
00:12:33,855 --> 00:12:34,985
Yes!
339
00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:36,455
He's interviewing her
in his room
340
00:12:36,490 --> 00:12:37,456
for Donny's bachelor party,
341
00:12:37,491 --> 00:12:38,823
but don't tell Daphne.
342
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,659
And how exactly do you interview
a stripper?
343
00:12:40,694 --> 00:12:42,093
I don't know,
344
00:12:42,128 --> 00:12:44,930
but I bet there's a real show
going on in there.
345
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:46,198
If you keep the gun
in its holster
346
00:12:46,233 --> 00:12:47,700
until the very
end, you see,
347
00:12:47,735 --> 00:12:49,033
that way your act
348
00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:51,937
has, you know, more, uh...
impact, shall we say.
349
00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:55,272
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
350
00:12:55,307 --> 00:12:58,109
Men seem to like my act
the way it is.
351
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:00,079
Oh, well, I certainly can't
tell you about attracting men,
352
00:13:00,114 --> 00:13:03,266
but I do know a thing or
two about showmanship.
353
00:13:03,301 --> 00:13:06,418
Tell me, uh, what sort
of encore do you have?
354
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:07,753
I don't have an encore.
355
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:09,019
Trust me.
356
00:13:09,054 --> 00:13:11,857
With this act, we're
going to need one.
357
00:13:11,892 --> 00:13:13,257
Um, I have an idea.
358
00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:15,159
Well, Mel's all set up
with Daphne.
359
00:13:15,194 --> 00:13:17,263
Oh, well, maybe we ought
to tell Frasier
360
00:13:17,696 --> 00:13:19,765
this is a good time
to get that stripper
361
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,267
out of here.
362
00:13:21,302 --> 00:13:22,166
Dad?
363
00:13:22,201 --> 00:13:23,669
Oh, Fras, okay, coast is clear.
364
00:13:24,170 --> 00:13:24,970
Everything's fine.
365
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:27,740
Not exactly.
366
00:13:33,078 --> 00:13:34,746
How did that happen?
367
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:36,380
Lord of the Dance here
368
00:13:36,415 --> 00:13:38,851
decided I needed
an encore.
369
00:13:41,687 --> 00:13:43,589
Well, I assumed
you had the key.
370
00:13:43,624 --> 00:13:44,555
I never use them!
371
00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:46,559
Oh... all right, we'll
just have to cut them off.
372
00:13:46,594 --> 00:13:48,360
All right, well,
come on in here.
373
00:13:48,395 --> 00:13:50,830
I'm Niles.
374
00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:54,331
Now, you might come
to a point
375
00:13:54,366 --> 00:13:57,169
where it feels like
you can't take it anymore.
376
00:13:57,204 --> 00:13:59,004
I call that "phase one. "
377
00:14:01,373 --> 00:14:03,709
Are you sure
you know what you're doing?
378
00:14:03,744 --> 00:14:05,644
I know exactly
what I'm doing.
379
00:14:09,648 --> 00:14:11,115
Oh.
380
00:14:11,150 --> 00:14:12,116
Just relax.
381
00:14:12,151 --> 00:14:14,919
Oh, this is all
Maris' fault.
382
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:18,290
You know, she actually
called me and said she'd...
383
00:14:18,325 --> 00:14:20,593
lay off if I'd stop seeing him.
384
00:14:20,628 --> 00:14:21,859
What'd you say?
385
00:14:21,894 --> 00:14:23,579
Well, I hung up on her.
386
00:14:23,614 --> 00:14:25,229
How insane is this woman?
387
00:14:25,264 --> 00:14:28,767
She thinks I'd give up Niles
to protect my practice?
388
00:14:28,802 --> 00:14:30,002
I'm crazy about him.
389
00:14:30,037 --> 00:14:31,168
The way he laughs,
390
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:34,106
the way he gets that
little glint in his eye
391
00:14:34,141 --> 00:14:37,009
when he's about to say
something clever...
392
00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:39,195
But you know what
I love the most?
393
00:14:39,230 --> 00:14:41,312
It's like there are
all these things
394
00:14:41,347 --> 00:14:44,850
that he could be if he could
just trust someone enough
395
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:46,785
to help him
unlock it all, and...
396
00:14:46,820 --> 00:14:48,686
if I could be
that person-
397
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:51,724
you know, that safe
person in his life-
398
00:14:51,759 --> 00:14:53,190
well, the more
I know him
399
00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:56,228
the more I know that's
all I want to be.
400
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:59,832
Daphne?
401
00:14:59,867 --> 00:15:02,852
Oh...
402
00:15:02,887 --> 00:15:05,803
Oh!
403
00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:06,804
This isn't working, Dad.
404
00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,841
There's only one thing
left to do.
405
00:15:08,876 --> 00:15:09,807
Well, I got
to warn you.
406
00:15:09,842 --> 00:15:11,593
I'm not as good a shot
as I used to be,
407
00:15:11,628 --> 00:15:13,345
but you'll have to go out
on the balcony.
408
00:15:13,846 --> 00:15:15,848
I need a cup of coffee
to steady my nerves!
409
00:15:15,883 --> 00:15:17,147
Dad!
410
00:15:17,182 --> 00:15:19,919
I meant, go to a locksmith.
411
00:15:19,954 --> 00:15:20,818
Oh, thank God.
412
00:15:20,853 --> 00:15:22,621
All right, let's go. Come on.
413
00:15:22,656 --> 00:15:23,888
Oh, wait, hold on.
414
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,424
I have to put
something on.
415
00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:27,927
Wait, wait,
I'll get it.
416
00:15:27,962 --> 00:15:29,428
I'll get it.
417
00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:32,097
It's Maris!
418
00:15:32,132 --> 00:15:33,633
At least...
419
00:15:33,668 --> 00:15:35,099
I think it is.
420
00:15:35,134 --> 00:15:36,535
You need a bigger peephole.
421
00:15:36,570 --> 00:15:37,937
What on earth
422
00:15:37,972 --> 00:15:39,055
isshedoing here?
423
00:15:39,090 --> 00:15:40,139
I have no idea,
424
00:15:40,572 --> 00:15:41,605
but we can't let her
anywhere near Mel,
425
00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,476
especially now that Maris
has the weight advantage.
426
00:15:45,577 --> 00:15:46,777
What are we going to do?
427
00:15:46,812 --> 00:15:47,980
Take her into Frasier's room.
428
00:15:48,015 --> 00:15:48,679
Wait, wait!
429
00:15:48,714 --> 00:15:49,898
I can't been seen like this.
430
00:15:49,933 --> 00:15:51,192
She'll blab it all over town.
431
00:15:51,227 --> 00:15:52,339
Get in the bathroom!
Right.
432
00:15:52,374 --> 00:15:53,452
I'll call you
when she leaves.
433
00:15:53,487 --> 00:15:54,787
Thank you,
Niles.
434
00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:06,365
You know, seeing as how
we have a-a minute or two here,
435
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,367
I may as well
take this opportunity
436
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:11,020
to end the suspense.
437
00:16:11,055 --> 00:16:13,604
You've got the job.
438
00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:14,974
I've got a little news
for you, too.
439
00:16:15,009 --> 00:16:15,906
Hmm?
440
00:16:15,941 --> 00:16:18,911
I've been on the clock since
you slapped the cuffs on me.
441
00:16:18,946 --> 00:16:21,578
Fair enough.
442
00:16:21,613 --> 00:16:24,032
Ooh. It's
freezing in here.
443
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:26,452
Oh, uh, yes, here,
let me...
444
00:16:26,952 --> 00:16:28,954
I seem to remember
doing this
445
00:16:29,455 --> 00:16:33,459
back in my college days
at a fraternity hazing.
446
00:16:33,494 --> 00:16:35,426
Here you are.
447
00:16:35,461 --> 00:16:36,962
Oh... here you go.
448
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,464
Yeah.
449
00:16:39,431 --> 00:16:40,899
Thank you.
450
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:45,803
It's hand-stitched.
451
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,771
Frasier, come on out.
452
00:16:47,806 --> 00:16:49,224
All right,
we're out of here.
453
00:16:49,259 --> 00:16:50,642
My God! Have
you seen Maris?!
454
00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:52,142
Yes, Dad, I know.
455
00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:53,577
Did Niles
calm her down?
456
00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:55,045
Yeah, he took her to your room
457
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:56,447
but he had to
butter her up a little.
458
00:16:56,482 --> 00:16:58,684
I was afraid that narrow doorway
might pose a problem.
459
00:17:01,687 --> 00:17:02,671
Frasier!
460
00:17:02,706 --> 00:17:03,698
Regan.
461
00:17:03,733 --> 00:17:04,690
Hello.
462
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:07,157
Uh, listen, uh,
463
00:17:07,192 --> 00:17:08,961
I'm sorry about
this afternoon, um...
464
00:17:08,996 --> 00:17:10,279
Oh, forget about that.
465
00:17:10,314 --> 00:17:11,589
It was no big deal.
466
00:17:11,624 --> 00:17:12,830
By the way, uh,
467
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,367
I was wondering
if you'd be available to...
468
00:17:15,402 --> 00:17:17,369
Oh, Lord.
Oh!
469
00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:25,376
Gosh...
470
00:17:25,411 --> 00:17:26,662
no need to
be embarrassed
471
00:17:26,697 --> 00:17:27,878
about that,
you know?
472
00:17:27,913 --> 00:17:29,782
I do that sort of thing all the time.
473
00:17:29,817 --> 00:17:31,515
Say, uh...
474
00:17:31,550 --> 00:17:32,885
you were saying?
475
00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:33,684
Uh...
476
00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:36,020
Yeah, just, uh...
477
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,057
let me get all this
cleaned up first.
478
00:17:38,092 --> 00:17:40,559
Yes, uh...
479
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,266
There you go.
480
00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:51,253
You know, I
- I'd gladly have helped you,
481
00:17:51,288 --> 00:17:53,205
it's just that
I've-I've hurt my back.
482
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:54,674
You see, oh...
oh, gosh, oh!
483
00:17:54,709 --> 00:17:56,108
Oh, it's seizing up again.
484
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:57,274
You know,
485
00:17:57,309 --> 00:17:59,394
maybe it would be best
if I just...
486
00:17:59,429 --> 00:18:01,480
went back inside
and crawled into bed.
487
00:18:01,515 --> 00:18:03,615
Good night.
488
00:18:04,883 --> 00:18:05,918
It's going to be
a moment.
489
00:18:05,953 --> 00:18:07,384
I figured.
490
00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:09,421
I'm just going to
make us some tea.
491
00:18:09,456 --> 00:18:11,007
Back inside!
492
00:18:11,042 --> 00:18:13,251
Frasier!
493
00:18:13,286 --> 00:18:15,426
Oh...
494
00:18:15,461 --> 00:18:18,864
you're a lucky man
having this woman on your staff.
495
00:18:18,899 --> 00:18:20,365
Thank you again,
Daphne.
496
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:21,366
You're welcome.
497
00:18:21,401 --> 00:18:22,633
Oh.
498
00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:24,369
Niles, where are you going
with all that food?
499
00:18:24,404 --> 00:18:25,669
Um, Dad is not feeling well
500
00:18:25,704 --> 00:18:28,707
so I thought I'd bring him
some comfort food.
501
00:18:29,241 --> 00:18:31,175
And, uh, by the way,
if anyone is going out,
502
00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:35,214
Dad specifically requested
something called a chalupa.
503
00:18:40,385 --> 00:18:44,223
Uh, Daphne, would you mind
getting that?
504
00:18:44,258 --> 00:18:45,456
You're not serious?
505
00:18:45,491 --> 00:18:47,893
You are on the staff after all.
506
00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:53,615
Hi, Daphne.
507
00:18:53,650 --> 00:18:54,658
Hey, Regan.
508
00:18:54,693 --> 00:18:55,667
Come on in.
509
00:18:55,702 --> 00:18:56,967
Um...
510
00:18:57,002 --> 00:18:57,935
Oh, Frasier.
511
00:18:57,970 --> 00:19:00,506
I- I was concerned
about your back.
512
00:19:00,541 --> 00:19:01,438
You hurt your back?
513
00:19:01,473 --> 00:19:03,440
Uh, no, no.
Just a-a-a spasm.
514
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:04,977
See, leaning against the wall
like this,
515
00:19:05,012 --> 00:19:06,529
it actually feels a lot better.
516
00:19:06,564 --> 00:19:08,046
Is it upper back
or lower?
517
00:19:08,081 --> 00:19:09,012
Uh, middle,
actually.
518
00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:11,049
If you could all
just leave me alone.
519
00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:12,349
Really, I'm fine
right here.
520
00:19:12,384 --> 00:19:14,384
Why don't we just get you
onto the couch.
521
00:19:14,419 --> 00:19:16,221
No, no, no, please, please.
I- I know what I'm doing.
522
00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:17,156
We'll each take a side.
523
00:19:17,191 --> 00:19:18,622
No, stop!
524
00:19:18,657 --> 00:19:20,058
No, Frasier, it could
be a thoracic strain.
525
00:19:20,093 --> 00:19:22,159
Or a bulging disc.
526
00:19:22,194 --> 00:19:24,328
Yes, impinging
on your lumbar nerve.
527
00:19:24,363 --> 00:19:26,014
Yes, it could easily be
any one of those things,
528
00:19:26,049 --> 00:19:27,666
but did you also consider
that it might be...
529
00:19:27,701 --> 00:19:30,669
the stripper
chained to my wrist?
530
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,875
Officer Nasty!
531
00:19:36,910 --> 00:19:38,777
Oh!
532
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:43,348
Everyone, this is Dinah.
533
00:19:43,383 --> 00:19:44,615
You see,
534
00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:47,085
this all happened
because I was trying to prove
535
00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:48,552
that I'm a-a normal guy
536
00:19:48,587 --> 00:19:50,589
capable of doing
normal guy things
537
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:52,489
like throw a bachelor party.
538
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,493
And Daphne, Donny didn't know
anything about it,
539
00:19:54,528 --> 00:19:56,361
so I wish you'd just
lighten up.
540
00:19:57,596 --> 00:19:59,331
Regan, I-I can't
even imagine
541
00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:00,597
where this must put us.
542
00:20:00,632 --> 00:20:02,884
I guess it's time
I just accept the fact
543
00:20:02,919 --> 00:20:05,137
that things will never
work out between us.
544
00:20:05,172 --> 00:20:06,605
You're certainly
not to blame.
545
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,839
After today I...
546
00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:10,140
I can't see that any woman
547
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:12,477
would even want
to go out with me.
548
00:20:12,512 --> 00:20:15,280
I think... I would.
549
00:20:25,824 --> 00:20:27,526
Hey, Fras.
550
00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:29,193
Oh, hi, Dad.
551
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:31,029
How was your date?
552
00:20:32,998 --> 00:20:34,499
Well, it was nice, uh...
553
00:20:34,534 --> 00:20:36,501
we had a beer...
554
00:20:37,002 --> 00:20:37,968
Mm-hmm.
555
00:20:38,003 --> 00:20:38,969
Talked a bit...
556
00:20:39,004 --> 00:20:41,506
She has a hell of
a body, doesn't she?
557
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:47,262
Dad, that is not
what this evening was about.
558
00:20:47,297 --> 00:20:50,758
This evening was about, uh,
taking a chance...
559
00:20:50,793 --> 00:20:53,440
getting to know
a different sort of woman.
560
00:20:53,475 --> 00:20:56,053
Turns out she's really
quite interesting.
561
00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,590
Dinah- she's working her way
through grad school.
562
00:20:58,625 --> 00:20:59,859
She lives with her mother.
563
00:20:59,894 --> 00:21:01,058
She's extremely well-read.
564
00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,859
She even speaks
a couple of languages.
565
00:21:02,894 --> 00:21:05,197
Mmm. It really makes you
wonder, doesn't it?
566
00:21:05,232 --> 00:21:06,563
Yes, it does,
doesn't it?
567
00:21:06,598 --> 00:21:08,433
Makes you wonder
about how eager we are
568
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:09,968
to judge a book by its cover.
569
00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:12,904
How willing we are
to stereotype each other.
570
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:14,339
No, I mean it really
makes you wonder
571
00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:17,242
what that mother looks like.
572
00:21:26,518 --> 00:21:29,204
d Hey, baby,
I hear the blues a'callin'd
573
00:21:29,239 --> 00:21:31,890
d Tossed salads
and scrambled eggs d
574
00:21:31,925 --> 00:21:33,357
d Mercy d
575
00:21:33,392 --> 00:21:35,794
d And maybe
I seem a bit confused d
576
00:21:35,829 --> 00:21:38,196
d Well, maybe,
but I got you pegged d
577
00:21:40,198 --> 00:21:42,065
d But I don't know what to do d
578
00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:46,238
d With those tossed salads
and scrambled eggs d
579
00:21:46,273 --> 00:21:48,740
d They're callin' again. d
580
00:21:48,775 --> 00:21:50,709
Good night, Seattle!
581
00:21:50,744 --> 00:21:52,477
We love you!
39822
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