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1
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:05,808
- Thank you.
2
00:00:05,872 --> 00:00:07,672
- Whoa. Who are these from?
3
00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:09,081
- "Congrats on 'Night Nurse.'
4
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:11,135
"Think of me
for your future projects.
5
00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:13,311
Your fan, Debra Messing."
6
00:00:13,380 --> 00:00:14,850
- Oh, Debra.
7
00:00:14,914 --> 00:00:16,724
- God, ever since Mom
put in the "Deadline" article,
8
00:00:16,816 --> 00:00:19,216
everybody thinks "Night Nurse"
is still happening.
9
00:00:19,319 --> 00:00:20,589
- Which is great.
10
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:22,157
You get all the credit
for being in a movie
11
00:00:22,222 --> 00:00:23,862
without having
to actually film it.
12
00:00:23,923 --> 00:00:25,733
Like Angelina Jolie and
all those "Maleficent" movies.
13
00:00:25,825 --> 00:00:27,825
- Yeah, there's no way
those were real, right?
14
00:00:27,894 --> 00:00:29,704
- No.
They are 100% just posters.
15
00:00:29,763 --> 00:00:32,373
- But I wanted
to actually film it.
16
00:00:32,432 --> 00:00:34,932
- I know. It's still cool.
17
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:37,395
I mean, you have been dying
to be known as an actor,
18
00:00:37,504 --> 00:00:39,114
and now you technically are.
19
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:40,565
- Yeah, I mean, I have been
20
00:00:40,673 --> 00:00:43,783
getting a lot of messages
from gay celebrities.
21
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:45,447
- Wait. Who?
22
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:49,045
- Ben Platt and Adam Rippon
both DM'ed me and said congrats
23
00:00:49,115 --> 00:00:50,615
And Antoni sent me
a bunch of hearts.
24
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:51,887
- How many?
25
00:00:51,951 --> 00:00:53,621
- I dunno, like,
enough to make 'em small?
26
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,960
- Oh, my God.
Cary, you're in.
27
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:58,017
- What?
28
00:00:58,091 --> 00:00:59,891
- You are a Respected Gay now.
29
00:00:59,959 --> 00:01:02,199
That is the most powerful thing
a person can be.
30
00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:05,102
Famous gays want to know you.
They want to fuck you.
31
00:01:05,198 --> 00:01:07,128
Take your pick, baby.
I'd choose Antoni.
32
00:01:07,233 --> 00:01:10,903
I mean, imagine
having sex with him.
33
00:01:10,970 --> 00:01:13,040
Huh.
I can't get my brain to do it.
34
00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:16,876
- Holy shit. I just got a DM
from Dean Brennon.
35
00:01:16,943 --> 00:01:18,043
- Wait, the actor?
- Yeah.
36
00:01:18,111 --> 00:01:19,611
And he just asked me out.
37
00:01:19,712 --> 00:01:22,482
- Ugh, Dean Brennon is gay?
That sucks.
38
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:24,122
- Yeah. I mean,
he doesn't really
39
00:01:24,217 --> 00:01:25,417
comment on his sexuality,
40
00:01:25,485 --> 00:01:26,815
but he is playing
George Michael
41
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,420
in that new George Michael
biopic "George."
42
00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:31,218
- He is so hot.
You have to message him back.
43
00:01:31,291 --> 00:01:34,231
- Yeah, I'm gonna do it.
44
00:01:34,294 --> 00:01:36,904
I'm gonna fuck Dean Brennon.
- [squeals softly]
45
00:01:36,963 --> 00:01:39,173
- Or if I'm being honest,
Dean Brennon is gonna fuck me.
46
00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:40,425
- Yeah, he's probably
gonna fuck you.
47
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:41,400
- Mm-hmm.
48
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:42,968
♪ ♪
49
00:01:43,069 --> 00:01:45,339
- Chase.
Are you so excited for today?
50
00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:47,968
- Yeah. It's nice to be back
in the recording studio again.
51
00:01:48,074 --> 00:01:49,344
It's been so long.
52
00:01:49,442 --> 00:01:51,112
- And it doesn't get bigger
than "Bambi."
53
00:01:51,177 --> 00:01:53,607
- Wait, what?
- Yeah. You're playing Thumper
54
00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:55,250
in Disney's new
live-action "Bambi."
55
00:01:55,315 --> 00:01:57,175
It's gonna be exactly the same
as the original,
56
00:01:57,283 --> 00:01:58,753
only cost more and look worse.
57
00:01:58,818 --> 00:02:00,348
- But you said
I was collaborating
58
00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:02,423
on a project
with Drake and Cardi B.
59
00:02:02,489 --> 00:02:04,459
- You are.
Drake's playing Bambi,
60
00:02:04,524 --> 00:02:05,934
and Cardi B's playing
Bambi's mom.
61
00:02:05,992 --> 00:02:07,662
- But we're not actors.
- Yeah.
62
00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:10,200
They don't let actors do voice
acting for movies anymore.
63
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,756
It's only singers and athletes.
64
00:02:11,831 --> 00:02:14,471
So it's you, Drake, Cardi B,
Shawn Mendes is Mr. Mole,
65
00:02:14,534 --> 00:02:16,774
and Damian Davis from the
"Golden State Warriors"
66
00:02:16,836 --> 00:02:18,366
is Flower.
67
00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:20,171
All right, let's get in there.
Let's make some vocal magic.
68
00:02:20,273 --> 00:02:21,673
- Damian?
69
00:02:21,774 --> 00:02:24,444
My friend Lance is a huge fan
and wanted me to say hi,
70
00:02:24,511 --> 00:02:26,011
and that you almost have
the same birthday.
71
00:02:26,112 --> 00:02:28,722
His is January 11th
and yours is February 8th.
72
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:31,015
- Oh, wow, twins.
- [squeals softly]
73
00:02:31,117 --> 00:02:34,217
- Okay, let's go for one.
74
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:37,360
"Bambi" scene 12.
Thumper and Flower, take one.
75
00:02:37,457 --> 00:02:39,557
- What's wrong with your legs,
Flower?
76
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:40,989
Why can't they jump?
77
00:02:41,060 --> 00:02:43,160
- Cause I'm not a rabbit
like you,
78
00:02:43,229 --> 00:02:44,899
I'm just a little skunk.
79
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,028
- Great.
Let's go again.
80
00:02:46,132 --> 00:02:47,702
- Oh, hey, Mom got an offer
81
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:49,970
to host a prime time
game show for NBC.
82
00:02:50,036 --> 00:02:51,536
They're doing
"Tic Tac Toe" now.
83
00:02:51,638 --> 00:02:52,808
What do you think?
84
00:02:52,872 --> 00:02:55,312
- Oh, another thing?
And at night?
85
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:57,475
- Yeah. I was gonna pass cause
it seems like a cash grab.
86
00:02:57,544 --> 00:03:00,354
- Yeah, I think that's cool.
That's probably cool.
87
00:03:00,413 --> 00:03:02,083
Okay, I still have
some time with her.
88
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,082
- No, silly Bambi.
Those are called birds.
89
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:08,345
Say it with me.
B-b-b-birds.
90
00:03:08,421 --> 00:03:09,591
- This sucks.
91
00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:10,919
- Yeah, sorry, man.
I'm trying my best.
92
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:13,264
[phone chimes]
- Oh. It's official.
93
00:03:13,359 --> 00:03:15,329
Our own Cary Donald Dubek
94
00:03:15,395 --> 00:03:17,695
is now on a date
with Dean Brennon.
95
00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:19,374
- What? He is?
- Yeah.
96
00:03:19,432 --> 00:03:22,102
He's going to literally, like,
fuck a celebrity.
97
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:24,542
God, I wanna fuck a celebrity.
98
00:03:24,604 --> 00:03:26,874
- What's wrong with your legs,
Flower?
99
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:29,110
- Okay, Damian.
100
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:33,953
- Sorry, I--I just gotta say,
you are so hot.
101
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:35,777
[laughter]
102
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:37,022
- You're pretty hot yourself.
103
00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:40,293
- Oh, my God.
[chuckles]
104
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:41,446
- Is everything okay?
105
00:03:41,554 --> 00:03:42,794
- Yeah, I just wanna make sure
106
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,459
people can see
it's me in these.
107
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:45,927
[shutters clicking]
108
00:03:46,025 --> 00:03:48,285
- Sorry 'bout these guys.
They're obsessed with me.
109
00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:51,304
- Dean, you two together?
You having sex?
110
00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:54,867
- Guys, I don't comment
on my sexuality.
111
00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:57,474
- [chuckles]
That's so modern.
112
00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:59,370
But can I tell them
we're on a date?
113
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:00,769
Just 'cause otherwise
114
00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,283
it might look like
you're babysitting me.
115
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:04,635
- [chuckles]
Sorry.
116
00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,614
I like to keep my personal life
personal.
117
00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:10,383
- Totally. Totally. Yeah.
Do you wanna move inside or?
118
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:15,150
- No. That's okay.
Man, your hair is amazing.
119
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:16,615
What kind of product
do you use?
120
00:04:16,723 --> 00:04:18,163
- Oh, my God.
Now you are touching me.
121
00:04:18,257 --> 00:04:21,157
- Whoa, looks like somebody
has a comment.
122
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:24,101
Cary, let's talk about that big
boner you have under the table.
123
00:04:24,163 --> 00:04:26,173
- All right, well,
I--I also like
124
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,896
to keep my personal life
personal, guys. So.
125
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:30,999
- [laughing]
- No, you get it.
126
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,514
- Yeah.
127
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:35,065
- So I mean, your friend
loves me. But what about you?
128
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:36,581
- Well, I didn't before,
129
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:38,513
but now that you're sitting
in front of me,
130
00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:41,851
there's just so much
to work with.
131
00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,178
[chuckles]
132
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,183
- Listen, I'm just here
for the night,
133
00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,185
but would you wanna
come over for a drink?
134
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:51,517
I have an apartment here.
- Oh. Yeah. That'd be great.
135
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:53,464
- Hey, Damian.
We're ready for you.
136
00:04:53,526 --> 00:04:54,756
- All right.
They're ready for me.
137
00:04:54,827 --> 00:04:57,827
- Okay.
Good luck, Flower.
138
00:04:59,832 --> 00:05:01,672
[phone line trilling]
139
00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:02,998
- Hey, B.
140
00:05:03,102 --> 00:05:04,602
- Lance, Damian Davis
just invited me
141
00:05:04,671 --> 00:05:06,171
to his place for a drink.
142
00:05:06,272 --> 00:05:08,112
- What?
My Damian Davis?
143
00:05:08,174 --> 00:05:10,714
Hey, Leah's here right now.
Mind if I put her on speaker?
144
00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:12,150
- Oh, absolutely.
145
00:05:12,211 --> 00:05:14,651
This is actually
the perfect introduction to me.
146
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:16,384
Hi, Leah.Nice to meet you.
147
00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:19,192
- Hey, Brooke. You too.
Wait, which one's Damian Davis?
148
00:05:19,285 --> 00:05:20,645
- The one with the beard
you like.
149
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:23,120
- Oh, my God, Brooke,
he is so hot.
150
00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:24,319
And seems kind of funny?
151
00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:25,860
- Leah, he's hilarious.
152
00:05:25,958 --> 00:05:28,058
- Okay, you have to
keep us posted.
153
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,701
- Yeah, tell us everything.
- Um, dur.
154
00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:32,727
[squeals softly]
155
00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,302
- All right, let's go again
from the top.
156
00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:36,797
- Hey, how much longer
is this gonna take?
157
00:05:36,869 --> 00:05:40,139
- Um, as long as it takes, bud.
158
00:05:40,206 --> 00:05:42,736
Guess who's going to Damian
Davis' for a drink later?
159
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,182
Looks like Cary isn't
160
00:05:44,243 --> 00:05:47,413
the only one
who's gonna fuck a celebrity.
161
00:05:48,247 --> 00:05:50,847
- Yeah, I gotta say,
I love that shirt on you.
162
00:05:50,917 --> 00:05:53,087
- Oh, thanks.
- Do you mind if I--
163
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,716
- Touch my neck in front
of a thousand cameras?
164
00:05:54,821 --> 00:05:56,991
Absolutely not.
165
00:05:57,056 --> 00:05:58,056
- Oh.
166
00:05:58,157 --> 00:06:00,427
Mossimo.
- [chuckles]
167
00:06:00,526 --> 00:06:02,756
So I don't wanna leave this
for even one second,
168
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,832
but I--I have to go
to the bathroom.
169
00:06:04,897 --> 00:06:07,227
- Don't worry,
I won't go anywhere.
170
00:06:07,333 --> 00:06:08,843
- All right.
171
00:06:15,241 --> 00:06:16,841
[sighs]
172
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:21,249
- Cary Dubek, I have important
information you need to know.
173
00:06:22,782 --> 00:06:23,882
- What?
174
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:27,050
- Dean Brennon's not
who he says.
175
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:29,420
You're being gay-baited.
176
00:06:29,522 --> 00:06:31,622
- Excuse me?
Who are you?
177
00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,234
- [soft, squeaky fart]
178
00:06:33,292 --> 00:06:36,632
I cannot tell you who I am.
- Why not?
179
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:38,559
- Because I farted
and I'm embarrassed.
180
00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,101
It's Shuli.
- Shuli?
181
00:06:40,199 --> 00:06:41,629
- Shh!
Keep your voice down.
182
00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:42,944
I shouldn't even be here.
183
00:06:43,035 --> 00:06:44,635
It's breaking
The Publicist Code.
184
00:06:44,737 --> 00:06:47,107
But when I saw
the paparazzi pics online,
185
00:06:47,206 --> 00:06:48,636
I felt like
I needed to tell you.
186
00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:52,081
Dean Brennon is straight.
Like, super straight.
187
00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:53,905
- What?
No, he's not.
188
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,250
He's playing George
189
00:06:55,314 --> 00:06:57,054
in the new George Michael
biopic, "George."
190
00:06:57,116 --> 00:06:59,286
- Cary, you should know
better than anyone
191
00:06:59,385 --> 00:07:01,315
that only straight people
play gay roles.
192
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:04,061
But to get more press
while he promotes his movie,
193
00:07:04,123 --> 00:07:06,233
he's trying to make it
seem like maybe,
194
00:07:06,292 --> 00:07:10,332
just maybe he's gay so people
will talk about him more.
195
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:11,800
It's PR 101.
196
00:07:11,898 --> 00:07:14,398
- No, no, he literally
won't stop touching me.
197
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:17,237
- On the lips? Or is he just
touching your hair,
198
00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:19,343
checking your shirt tag
for the cameras?
199
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,509
Look, you're the new,
hot gay on the scene.
200
00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:25,277
He wants to ride your gay
without ever riding your ass.
201
00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:29,154
Want proof?
Go to this address.
202
00:07:29,248 --> 00:07:31,248
Now, I gotta go.
203
00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:35,192
To the bathroom!
Get the hell out of here.
204
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,318
- Okay.
205
00:07:39,325 --> 00:07:40,585
- Hey.
206
00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:44,100
Would you maybe wanna
go back to my place now?
207
00:07:44,163 --> 00:07:47,103
- Oh, really?
Wow, yeah.
208
00:07:47,166 --> 00:07:48,866
Yes, that is exactly
what I wanna do.
209
00:07:48,968 --> 00:07:50,838
Great, let's go.
210
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:53,037
God, Shuli is such an idiot.
211
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,009
[camera shutters clicking]
212
00:07:55,107 --> 00:07:57,337
- Mm, this wine is so good.
What is it?
213
00:07:57,443 --> 00:07:58,713
- Okay, but you can't
make fun of me
214
00:07:58,811 --> 00:08:00,311
'cause I'm kind of
a wine freak.
215
00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:03,349
It's a 2014 Domaine
Laroche Chablis.
216
00:08:03,449 --> 00:08:05,349
- Ooh, it's fancy.
217
00:08:05,451 --> 00:08:10,461
Um, where's your bathroom?
I just need to go real quick.
218
00:08:10,523 --> 00:08:12,123
Okay, it's going really well.
219
00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:15,501
We're having
a Donny Lachey Chablis.
220
00:08:15,561 --> 00:08:17,301
- Ooh, I gotta order me
some of that.
221
00:08:17,363 --> 00:08:20,573
- Does he look hot drinking it?
- Oh, my God, girl, so hot.
222
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:21,896
Okay, I gotta get back
out there.
223
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:23,901
I'll call if
anything else happens.
224
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:24,903
[door shuts]
225
00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:26,644
Hey.
- Hey.
226
00:08:26,706 --> 00:08:30,376
- Sorry about that.
Where were we?
227
00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:37,316
- I think we were
maybe at here.
228
00:08:42,421 --> 00:08:44,261
- I have to go
to the bathroom again.
229
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,757
[elevator bell rings]
230
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:50,729
- So here we are.
What do you think?
231
00:08:50,830 --> 00:08:52,100
- It's great.
232
00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:55,268
Would you maybe
wanna show me the bedroom?
233
00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:56,868
- Of course.
234
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,766
Or wait,
I forgot about my dog, Boomer.
235
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,611
We should probably
take him out first.
236
00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:02,166
Hey!
[claps]
237
00:09:02,241 --> 00:09:03,211
- What's that?
238
00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:04,506
- Dean Brennon!
239
00:09:04,577 --> 00:09:06,607
Walking his dog
with Night Nurse!
240
00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:08,012
Are you two more than friends?
241
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,850
- Guys, I don't comment
on my sexuality.
242
00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:13,047
Jeez, how do they
always find me?
243
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,619
Let's just go back
to your place.
244
00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,960
- Okay, yes.
Please.
245
00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:20,291
So here we are.
246
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,463
And right back here
is the bedroom.
247
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:23,762
- Cool.
248
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:25,463
But wait, Cary,
your trash is full.
249
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,625
Let me take it out
for you first.
250
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,573
- Sorry, take out my--
- Dean Brennon!
251
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:32,806
Taking out Night Nurse's trash!
252
00:09:32,905 --> 00:09:34,365
You two official?
You moving in together?
253
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:35,810
- You found me again?
254
00:09:35,908 --> 00:09:39,408
Guys, I wanna keep
my personal life personal.
255
00:09:39,478 --> 00:09:41,748
[camera shutters clicking]
256
00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:46,049
Jesus, I'm so sorry about that.
- It's okay.
257
00:09:46,118 --> 00:09:47,488
It's just getting late,
258
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,817
and I'd really like to head
to the bedroom.
259
00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:51,822
- Yes, of course.
260
00:09:51,924 --> 00:09:52,934
I'll let you get some sleep.
261
00:09:52,992 --> 00:09:54,332
- No, no, no, that's not--
262
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,827
- But I'll be back at dawn
with two coffees.
263
00:09:55,928 --> 00:09:57,598
Maybe we can walk up
and down Fifth Avenue
264
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:58,973
and drink them together?
265
00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:01,795
Night.
[door shuts]
266
00:10:08,074 --> 00:10:09,844
- Sorry.
Small bladder.
267
00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:12,613
Okay, things are
escalating quickly.
268
00:10:12,678 --> 00:10:13,608
He just took off my shirt.
269
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:14,809
both: Oh, my God!
270
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,076
- Okay,
now I took off his shirt.
271
00:10:18,150 --> 00:10:19,190
- Ooh!
272
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,915
- Is everything all right?
273
00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:23,687
- Okay, now we're both naked.
I think we're gonna have sex?
274
00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:24,819
- What?
275
00:10:25,691 --> 00:10:26,991
Okay, we're having sex!
276
00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:30,263
[screaming]
277
00:10:30,329 --> 00:10:31,499
[bottle shatters]
- [giggles]
278
00:10:34,867 --> 00:10:36,697
[siren wailing]
279
00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:39,772
[phone buzzing]
280
00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:41,269
- Oh, hey, Dean.
281
00:10:41,340 --> 00:10:43,040
- Cary. Where are you?I have our coffees.
282
00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:46,152
- I had to go into work early.
- Oh, bummer.
283
00:10:46,212 --> 00:10:47,812
Well, I was wonderingif you wanted
284
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:49,550
to come to the Equality Galawith me tonight?
285
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:50,879
- Oh, um--
286
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:52,523
- I won't take nofor an answer.
287
00:10:52,618 --> 00:10:54,048
Come over later,we can get ready together.
288
00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:55,293
[line clicks]
289
00:10:55,855 --> 00:10:58,715
[baby crying]
290
00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:01,864
[thunder rumbling]
291
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:05,455
[suspenseful music]
292
00:11:05,531 --> 00:11:11,671
♪ ♪
293
00:11:11,737 --> 00:11:13,337
[knocking]
294
00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:18,636
- What do you want?
295
00:11:18,711 --> 00:11:22,481
- My name's Cary.
Um, I need your help.
296
00:11:22,548 --> 00:11:25,078
- This is a private residence.
Go away.
297
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:29,224
- It's about Dean Brennon!
[thunder rumbles]
298
00:11:29,321 --> 00:11:31,821
[locks rattling]
299
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:42,171
Sorry, I--I heard you might
have proof
300
00:11:42,234 --> 00:11:43,504
Dean Brennon is straight.
301
00:11:43,569 --> 00:11:46,909
- I'm the proof.
We used to date.
302
00:11:47,006 --> 00:11:50,106
- Oh, my God.
You're Jordana Brewster?
303
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:52,749
- Please keep your voice down.
- Oh, right. Sorry. Yeah.
304
00:11:52,845 --> 00:11:54,205
I just--
305
00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:56,180
I just watched every
"Fast and the Furious" movie
306
00:11:56,248 --> 00:11:57,448
with my old roommate.
307
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:59,120
- Aw, that's so cool.
Thank you.
308
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:00,618
But, you know, it's so weird.
309
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,620
Everyone sees me as this,
like, badass action chick
310
00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:04,762
when really I'm just
this total nerd
311
00:12:04,857 --> 00:12:06,127
who majored in theater studies.
312
00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:07,755
- Oh, cool.
313
00:12:07,860 --> 00:12:09,530
- Yeah, I went to this college
in New Haven.
314
00:12:09,595 --> 00:12:10,695
Doesn't really matter
which college,
315
00:12:10,763 --> 00:12:12,533
but it was in New Haven.
316
00:12:12,598 --> 00:12:15,198
- I'm sorry, Ms. Brewster,
can we focus?
317
00:12:15,267 --> 00:12:17,137
I'm being gay-baited.
318
00:12:17,236 --> 00:12:19,466
- [clicks tongue]
Yeah.
319
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:23,642
So Dean and I dated
for two weeks in 2010.
320
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:26,113
We met shooting
a "Scooby-Doo-Flintstones"
321
00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:29,482
live action crossover film
called "Scooby-Doo 4:
322
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:31,152
Yabba Dabba Dooby."
[thunder rumbles]
323
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:33,550
- But when I Google
Dean Brennon Jordana Brewster,
324
00:12:33,619 --> 00:12:34,749
nothing comes up.
325
00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,420
- That's because
he had me scrubbed.
326
00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:41,159
Getty Images, his Wiki, there's
no trace of me anywhere.
327
00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:45,260
Luckily,
I managed to keep this.
328
00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:46,671
♪ ♪
329
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:47,626
- What?
330
00:12:47,733 --> 00:12:52,843
♪ ♪
331
00:12:52,938 --> 00:12:54,838
This is us...
332
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:56,680
at the
"2010 Teen Choice Awards."
333
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:59,776
- Oh, my God.
He is straight.
334
00:12:59,845 --> 00:13:02,005
He's wearing cargo shorts.
335
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,984
Actually, you're both
wearing cargo shorts.
336
00:13:04,083 --> 00:13:05,353
- Those were really good times.
337
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,151
But even then,
Dean wanted more.
338
00:13:07,253 --> 00:13:09,363
When we got home
from the ceremony,
339
00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:11,355
he punched a hole in the wall.
340
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:12,927
- Because he lost?
341
00:13:12,992 --> 00:13:14,132
- Because he won.
342
00:13:14,193 --> 00:13:15,863
Dean didn't want
a Teen Choice Award.
343
00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:17,861
He wanted an Oscar.
344
00:13:17,963 --> 00:13:22,303
And he said that he would stop
at nothing to get it.
345
00:13:22,368 --> 00:13:25,368
- I--I have to go.
Dean will be expecting me.
346
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:27,971
We're going to
the Equality Gala.
347
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:29,680
- Good luck.
- Thank you.
348
00:13:29,775 --> 00:13:32,605
- And please know
I can do highbrow too.
349
00:13:32,678 --> 00:13:34,178
I did "Godot" in college.
350
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,610
You know, I'll just tell you
which college it was.
351
00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:36,881
It was actually--
- Yale. Yes, I know.
352
00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:38,952
Jordana, I--I have to go.
353
00:13:39,018 --> 00:13:41,648
- [laughs]
I had a great time last night.
354
00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,320
- Oh, yeah?
So did I.
355
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:46,059
This is embarrassing,
but my lawyers make me do this.
356
00:13:46,158 --> 00:13:48,458
Would you be okay
signing an NDA?
357
00:13:48,527 --> 00:13:50,227
- Oh, of course.
358
00:13:50,329 --> 00:13:51,729
- I mean, obviously,
I trust you.
359
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:54,231
- It's no problem at all.
Your privacy is key.
360
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,743
- Thanks. It's just my fans
always wanna know every detail
361
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,236
of my personal life,
you know?
362
00:13:58,337 --> 00:14:02,067
- Totally. Yeah.
Discretion is my middle name.
363
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:03,844
Okay,
you guys can't tell anyone
364
00:14:03,909 --> 00:14:05,909
that I fucked Damian Davis
because I just signed an NDA.
365
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:07,751
- Whoa.Okay, you got it, B.
366
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:09,677
- Yeah, Brooke, I promiseI won't tell anyone either.
367
00:14:09,748 --> 00:14:11,178
- Perfect.
Well, then I'm not worried,
368
00:14:11,250 --> 00:14:14,850
'cause you two
are the only people I told.
369
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:19,829
[thunder rumbling]
370
00:14:21,227 --> 00:14:22,487
- Dean?
371
00:14:22,561 --> 00:14:25,561
[oldies music playing softly]
372
00:14:25,664 --> 00:14:29,404
♪ ♪
373
00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:33,271
Dean?
- Hey! Just in the shower.
374
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:35,772
Come on in.
I'll be out in a sec.
375
00:14:38,911 --> 00:14:42,051
- Ow. Daddy, no!Ow! It hurts!
376
00:14:42,114 --> 00:14:43,884
- So how was your day?
377
00:14:43,949 --> 00:14:45,949
♪ ♪
378
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:49,221
- I met someone who knows you.
379
00:14:49,288 --> 00:14:52,458
Jordana Brewster?
380
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:56,758
- Oh, yeah,
from "Fast and the Furious"?
381
00:14:56,862 --> 00:14:58,432
What's she like?
I never met her.
382
00:14:58,530 --> 00:15:00,470
- Oh, really?
383
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:03,466
'Cause she told me
she was your date
384
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:06,769
to the
"2010 Teen Choice Awards."
385
00:15:06,872 --> 00:15:08,972
- Huh. [chuckles]
That's weird.
386
00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:10,584
- Cut the crap, Dean.
387
00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:13,653
I know what's going on.
You've been gay-baiting me.
388
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,606
- Okay, now you're being crazy.
389
00:15:15,714 --> 00:15:18,554
- I'm not being crazy.
390
00:15:18,617 --> 00:15:20,317
You're crazy.
You used me, Dean.
391
00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:22,149
You made me think
this was real.
392
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:23,764
I thought we were
gonna have sex.
393
00:15:23,822 --> 00:15:24,992
Like, I thought I was gonna
get to see your dick
394
00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:26,930
and your balls and your butt.
395
00:15:26,992 --> 00:15:28,432
But I haven't gotten
to see anything.
396
00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:29,664
I haven't even seen one cheek.
397
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:31,332
- Cary, you're
being hysterical.
398
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:33,470
And frankly, you're not pretty
when you're like this.
399
00:15:33,565 --> 00:15:37,135
- Was I ever pretty to you?
400
00:15:37,236 --> 00:15:38,796
- I don't comment
on my sexuality.
401
00:15:38,904 --> 00:15:41,074
- Oh, my God.
Tell the truth.
402
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:44,080
You're never gonna ride
my ass hard, are you?
403
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:48,979
- No.
[thunder rumbles]
404
00:15:49,081 --> 00:15:51,081
- I have to get out of here.
- Don't go. Please.
405
00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:53,620
I can explain.
406
00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:55,346
- [clears throat]
407
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,524
- Hey Brooke,
have a nice night?
408
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:58,823
- Nothing special.
409
00:15:58,924 --> 00:16:00,034
- Hey, Brooke,
how was your evening?
410
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,455
- Quiet.
Read a book.
411
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:02,797
- Brooke,
what'd you do last night?
412
00:16:02,861 --> 00:16:03,861
- Shut up, bitch!
413
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:04,803
- Oh.
414
00:16:04,863 --> 00:16:08,003
[indistinct chatter]
415
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,198
- Jesus!
416
00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:13,212
Mom, what are you doing?
417
00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:14,305
Mom!
418
00:16:14,373 --> 00:16:16,313
- Oh, hi, honey.
Sorry about that.
419
00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:18,175
I trained myself to sleep
standing up
420
00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:19,877
so I can take 20-second catnaps
421
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,349
while people don't need me
without messing up my hair.
422
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:23,047
That's what Ryan Seacrest
does, so.
423
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:24,718
- Okay. Well, I'll just
let you get back to it.
424
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,547
- Oh, what did you guys decide
about "Tic Tac Toe?"
425
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:28,292
- Oh, I think
we're just gonna pass.
426
00:16:28,354 --> 00:16:29,864
- Okay, yeah,
I don't have to do that.
427
00:16:29,955 --> 00:16:31,715
We should probably
let someone else host that.
428
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,364
But then again, if you think
it's a good idea, Brookie,
429
00:16:33,459 --> 00:16:34,629
I'm more than happy to do it.
[phone buzzing]
430
00:16:34,693 --> 00:16:37,633
- Okay.
Uh, sorry, Mom.
431
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,073
- Hello, Brooke Dubek.
432
00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,337
- Ms. Dubek,my name is Philip Price.
433
00:16:43,402 --> 00:16:45,002
I represent Damian Davis.
434
00:16:45,070 --> 00:16:47,040
We have reason to believeyou broke your NDA
435
00:16:47,139 --> 00:16:49,639
and we intend to takelegal action against you.
436
00:16:49,708 --> 00:16:52,378
- Wait, what?
437
00:16:52,478 --> 00:16:55,978
- You don't understand, Cary.
I'm not a bad guy.
438
00:16:56,048 --> 00:16:57,978
My life is just
so much better now
439
00:16:58,050 --> 00:17:01,190
that people think
I might maybe kinda be gay.
440
00:17:01,253 --> 00:17:06,393
I used to be nothing. A nobody.
But now--now, I'm a somebody.
441
00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:09,262
Last year, I was ever only
on the cover of "Men's Health."
442
00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:11,101
It was just me John Krasinski
switching off months.
443
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:13,926
But this month alone,
I'm on "Men's Health"
444
00:17:14,032 --> 00:17:17,442
and "GQ" and "Attitude."
445
00:17:17,536 --> 00:17:20,706
Do you know how that feels?
446
00:17:20,773 --> 00:17:22,173
- Actually, no.
447
00:17:22,241 --> 00:17:25,411
- I mean, people ship me, Cary.
They ship me.
448
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:26,851
On Twitter, Instagram,
449
00:17:26,912 --> 00:17:29,782
everyone is obsessed
because I'm a mystery.
450
00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:34,722
I'm an enigma.
I am the coolest man alive.
451
00:17:34,787 --> 00:17:36,687
- You're a psychopath.
452
00:17:36,755 --> 00:17:38,015
And I've
already dated one straight guy.
453
00:17:38,090 --> 00:17:39,260
I'm not doing it again.
454
00:17:39,358 --> 00:17:40,288
♪ ♪
455
00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:42,632
- I'm not going back, Cary.
456
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:45,798
I'm not going back
to 100% straight for sure.
457
00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:48,028
I mean, there's Oscar buzz
for me for "George."
458
00:17:48,100 --> 00:17:51,140
I'm in talks to play
the first gay superhero.
459
00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:53,306
You know how huge
that would be for me?
460
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:55,635
And for you guys.
461
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,611
So here's what we're gonna do.
462
00:17:57,709 --> 00:18:00,879
You are going to come to this
Equality Gala with me tonight,
463
00:18:00,946 --> 00:18:05,416
and you are gonna stand
by my side and smile.
464
00:18:05,484 --> 00:18:08,924
And if anybody asks,
465
00:18:08,987 --> 00:18:10,887
we do not...
466
00:18:10,956 --> 00:18:12,826
comment...
467
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,225
on our sexuality.
468
00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:18,103
- [gasps]
[thunder rumbles]
469
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:21,503
[knock at door]
470
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,140
- Oh.
Hey, B.
471
00:18:23,235 --> 00:18:26,065
- Don't "Hey, B" me,
you little snake.
472
00:18:26,138 --> 00:18:27,638
- Whoa.
What?
473
00:18:27,739 --> 00:18:29,439
- Oh, sure. Yeah, play dumb,
but I know for a fact
474
00:18:29,508 --> 00:18:31,838
that you told people
that I fucked Damian Davis.
475
00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:33,254
- Wait.
No, I didn't.
476
00:18:33,312 --> 00:18:34,352
I would never do you dirty
like that.
477
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:35,476
- Oh, yeah?
478
00:18:35,581 --> 00:18:36,951
Well, if you didn't tell,
who did?
479
00:18:37,015 --> 00:18:38,345
- Oh, Brooke, hey.
480
00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,520
- Enough of your shit,
you rat-faced bitch.
481
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:41,819
I knew it was you all along.
482
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,360
- What?
I didn't say a word.
483
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,985
- Yeah.
B, neither of us told.
484
00:18:45,090 --> 00:18:47,160
We haven't even left
the apartment today.
485
00:18:47,259 --> 00:18:50,459
- Yeah.
- Well, then what the hell?
486
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:53,329
Like, literally
how did this get out, then?
487
00:18:53,432 --> 00:18:55,332
I fucked Damian Davis.
488
00:18:55,434 --> 00:18:56,444
[words echoing]
489
00:18:56,502 --> 00:18:59,872
Oh, my God.
I'm so dumb.
490
00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,712
I also told Streeter.
491
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:06,043
- Oh, wow.
492
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,375
It's cool to see so many people
493
00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:08,449
coming to this Equality Gala
tonight.
494
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:09,724
The "Pose" people,
495
00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:11,715
that little lesbian
tennis player,
496
00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,047
Dean Brennon.
497
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,622
- Then tomorrow,
I thought we'd head to JFK.
498
00:19:15,687 --> 00:19:18,317
Not to fly anywhere, just to
drag empty suitcases around
499
00:19:18,390 --> 00:19:19,960
while the paparazzi
take pictures.
500
00:19:20,025 --> 00:19:21,355
[placid classical musicplaying]
501
00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:25,200
- Yes, Dean.
Whatever you say, Dean.
502
00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:28,227
- Okay, we're here.
503
00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:29,233
Smile.
504
00:19:29,334 --> 00:19:30,904
[camera shutters clicking]
505
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,373
- It's Dean Brennon!
- Over here, Dean!
506
00:19:33,472 --> 00:19:35,142
[overlapping shouting]
507
00:19:35,207 --> 00:19:37,537
- Dean, can you finally confirm
what's going on with you two?
508
00:19:37,643 --> 00:19:39,143
- I don't comment
on my sexuality.
509
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:41,651
[words echoing] I keep
my personal life personal.
510
00:19:41,713 --> 00:19:45,923
I'll just say Cary has become
a huge part of my life.
511
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,548
I don't comment--
I don't comment--
512
00:19:47,653 --> 00:19:49,323
I don't comment
on my sexuality.
513
00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:51,018
I don't comment
on my sexuality.
514
00:19:51,089 --> 00:19:53,059
- Sorry, I just need to go, uh,
515
00:19:53,158 --> 00:19:55,728
touch up my eye jewels.
516
00:19:55,827 --> 00:19:58,027
- Dean!
- Over here!
517
00:19:58,096 --> 00:19:59,426
- Hi Streeter, it's Brooke.
518
00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:01,271
Just calling
'cause apparently it got out
519
00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:02,996
that I fucked Damian Davis,
520
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:05,238
and I know for a fact
it was you.
521
00:20:05,337 --> 00:20:06,667
So hold on to your ass,
522
00:20:06,738 --> 00:20:10,678
'cause I'm on my way
to tear it a new hole!
523
00:20:10,742 --> 00:20:12,882
Go faster!
524
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:14,445
Streeter!
525
00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:16,716
- Oh. Hey, Brooke. I was just
listening to your voicemail.
526
00:20:16,782 --> 00:20:18,582
- 'Cause I'm on my wayto tear it a new asshole!
527
00:20:18,684 --> 00:20:20,054
No--no, I didn't tell anybody,
I swear!
528
00:20:20,118 --> 00:20:21,788
[phone buzzing]
Please don't hurt my ass!
529
00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,517
- Hello, Brooke Dubek.
530
00:20:23,589 --> 00:20:25,789
- Ms. Dubek, Philip Price.You broke your NDA again.
531
00:20:25,891 --> 00:20:27,291
- What?
No, I didn't.
532
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:28,962
- Yes, you did.
533
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:30,631
We'd like you to comeinto our offices tomorrow
534
00:20:30,729 --> 00:20:32,029
and discussthe financial implications.
535
00:20:32,097 --> 00:20:33,867
[line clicks]
536
00:20:33,932 --> 00:20:35,632
- What is going on?
537
00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:37,274
I mean, if you didn't say
anything,
538
00:20:37,369 --> 00:20:39,239
Lance and Leah haven't left
their apartment all day.
539
00:20:39,304 --> 00:20:41,214
How is this happening?
540
00:20:41,273 --> 00:20:42,983
I fucked Damian Davis.
541
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:44,275
Go faster!
542
00:20:44,376 --> 00:20:47,246
Oh, my God.
543
00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:49,152
It's so obvious.
544
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,978
Lance,
your apartment is bugged.
545
00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:53,823
- Yeah! That's how they found
out Brooke fucked Damian Davis!
546
00:20:53,919 --> 00:20:55,389
- What?
- I know it sounds insane,
547
00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:57,994
but there is literally
no other explanation.
548
00:20:58,090 --> 00:20:59,490
[engine revving]
549
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:02,491
- [sighs]
Fuck.
550
00:21:03,962 --> 00:21:05,502
- Hey, everything okay?
551
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:06,827
My name's James.
552
00:21:06,932 --> 00:21:08,732
I'm on the board
of the Equality Foundation.
553
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,270
- Oh, thank God.
554
00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:12,795
Um, yes, there's actually
something I need to tell you.
555
00:21:12,904 --> 00:21:15,474
Dean Brennon isn't
who he says he is.
556
00:21:15,574 --> 00:21:16,684
- What?
557
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:19,105
- Yeah, he's--
he's 100% straight.
558
00:21:19,177 --> 00:21:21,977
He's been gay-baiting me.
559
00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:24,420
- Oh, my God.
Hold on.
560
00:21:26,818 --> 00:21:28,848
Now listen up,
you little faggot.
561
00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:30,264
Of course Dean's straight!
562
00:21:30,322 --> 00:21:31,692
But you're not gonna say a word
563
00:21:31,790 --> 00:21:33,790
because we need him
at events like this.
564
00:21:33,859 --> 00:21:36,359
You think Gus Kenworthy
is coming to this shit
565
00:21:36,461 --> 00:21:38,131
if it's just Billie Jean King?
566
00:21:38,196 --> 00:21:41,966
No. Plus, if he leaves,
who do we flirt with?
567
00:21:42,034 --> 00:21:46,474
- Um,
all the other gay people?
568
00:21:46,538 --> 00:21:47,668
- Ew.
569
00:21:47,773 --> 00:21:49,213
Listen, we're not idiots.
570
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:52,108
Everyone here knows
Dean is straight.
571
00:21:52,177 --> 00:21:55,047
We just like to believe
he's gay. It gives us hope.
572
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,517
It makes us think
that anything is possible,
573
00:21:56,615 --> 00:22:00,615
that anyone at any time
could be gay.
574
00:22:00,686 --> 00:22:04,216
Don't you wanna live
in a world like that?
575
00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:05,623
- No.
576
00:22:05,691 --> 00:22:07,061
No, this is fucked, okay?
577
00:22:07,159 --> 00:22:08,489
You can all do what you want,
578
00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,530
but I'm not gonna be
a part of it.
579
00:22:10,629 --> 00:22:12,799
- Suit yourself.
I'll let Dean know you left.
580
00:22:12,864 --> 00:22:16,174
Hmm, that's actually a good in.
581
00:22:16,234 --> 00:22:17,644
Oh, Deanie!
582
00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:18,743
[indistinct chatter]
583
00:22:18,837 --> 00:22:20,667
[door shuts]
- Ugh.
584
00:22:20,739 --> 00:22:24,039
[indistinct chatter]
585
00:22:24,142 --> 00:22:25,542
[door shuts]
586
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:29,553
[door shuts]
587
00:22:32,651 --> 00:22:35,391
- Hey, guys.
I brought wine.
588
00:22:35,487 --> 00:22:37,187
[whispering]
I didn't. Get in the bathroom.
589
00:22:37,255 --> 00:22:38,755
- What?
590
00:22:38,857 --> 00:22:40,357
[shower water pattering]
591
00:22:40,425 --> 00:22:43,355
- Okay, no one talk louder
than the sound of the water.
592
00:22:43,428 --> 00:22:45,028
- Yeah, otherwise
the bugs will hear.
593
00:22:45,097 --> 00:22:46,427
- Come on, B, really?
594
00:22:46,531 --> 00:22:48,501
You think there's bugs
in this apartment?
595
00:22:48,567 --> 00:22:51,167
- I don't know. All I know is
that I didn't tell anyone else
596
00:22:51,236 --> 00:22:52,936
that I fucked Damian Davis.
597
00:22:53,038 --> 00:22:54,938
[phone buzzing]
What?
598
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,440
Hello, Brooke Dubek.
599
00:22:56,541 --> 00:22:57,941
- Ms. Dubek, Philip Price.
600
00:22:58,043 --> 00:23:00,183
We know you broke your NDAfor a third time
601
00:23:00,245 --> 00:23:01,605
and it's time for you--
602
00:23:01,713 --> 00:23:05,253
- Yes, Philip, I know the rest.
Thank you.
603
00:23:05,917 --> 00:23:09,117
Oh, my God.
How is this happening again?
604
00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:10,961
- Brooke fucked Damian Davis!
605
00:23:11,056 --> 00:23:13,456
- Oh, my God, Brooke.
- What? What is it?
606
00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:16,228
- There are no bugs
in the wall.
607
00:23:16,294 --> 00:23:18,404
One of us here
is wearing a wire.
608
00:23:18,463 --> 00:23:19,803
both: We're not wearing wires.
609
00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:22,368
- Yes. It's the only
logical explanation.
610
00:23:22,434 --> 00:23:23,974
both: No, it's not.
There's no wires.
611
00:23:24,069 --> 00:23:28,469
- Then there's only one way
to find out who it is.
612
00:23:28,573 --> 00:23:32,213
Okay, so it was no one.
No one's wearing a wire.
613
00:23:32,277 --> 00:23:34,807
- Yeah, that was a bad pitch.
Who pitched that, Leah?
614
00:23:34,913 --> 00:23:36,153
- I don't get it.
615
00:23:36,248 --> 00:23:38,718
Like, I am a smart girl.
What am I missing?
616
00:23:38,784 --> 00:23:40,754
I mean, I was alone
every single time
617
00:23:40,819 --> 00:23:42,589
I called you guys
from those Lyfts.
618
00:23:42,654 --> 00:23:44,964
- Wait, girl.
You called us from Lyfts?
619
00:23:45,056 --> 00:23:45,956
- Uh-huh.
620
00:23:46,057 --> 00:23:47,927
- Brooke.
- Oh, my God.
621
00:23:47,993 --> 00:23:49,263
- What?
- Come on.
622
00:23:49,327 --> 00:23:50,627
- Give me my shirt.
- Here.
623
00:23:50,729 --> 00:23:51,999
- What?
624
00:23:52,097 --> 00:23:53,467
- Yeah, come on, Brooke.
'Cause I also...
625
00:23:53,565 --> 00:23:56,665
- What?
- Now see what they see.
626
00:23:56,768 --> 00:24:00,638
- Guys? Really, seriously,
I don't get it.
627
00:24:00,739 --> 00:24:03,639
Also, it was nice to meet you
Leah.
628
00:24:03,742 --> 00:24:05,142
Bangin' bod, girl.
629
00:24:08,079 --> 00:24:09,349
- ♪ Ring around the rosy ♪
630
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:12,178
♪ Pocket full of posies ♪
631
00:24:12,284 --> 00:24:14,654
♪ Ashes, ashes ♪
632
00:24:14,753 --> 00:24:18,123
♪ We all fall down ♪
633
00:24:23,495 --> 00:24:27,195
- You look well.
- Here's your harness back.
634
00:24:27,299 --> 00:24:29,699
- Thanks.
635
00:24:29,801 --> 00:24:32,001
Not that I'll be needing it.
636
00:24:32,103 --> 00:24:34,113
I didn't get that
gay superhero movie.
637
00:24:34,172 --> 00:24:37,982
- That's what you get, Dean.
You shouldn't gay-bait people.
638
00:24:38,043 --> 00:24:41,113
You know the most annoying part
of all of this?
639
00:24:41,179 --> 00:24:43,319
I got messages
from so many other guys.
640
00:24:43,381 --> 00:24:46,281
I could have had sex
with any of them.
641
00:24:46,351 --> 00:24:49,051
But I chose you.
642
00:24:49,154 --> 00:24:51,864
- And why do you think
that was?
643
00:24:51,957 --> 00:24:53,227
- What?
644
00:24:53,325 --> 00:24:55,485
Because you were the hottest.
645
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:58,030
- Or was it because I was
the straightest?
646
00:24:58,129 --> 00:24:59,799
[soft dramatic music]
647
00:24:59,865 --> 00:25:01,125
- No. No.
648
00:25:01,199 --> 00:25:02,729
I didn't--I didn't know
you were straight.
649
00:25:02,834 --> 00:25:04,074
I thought you were gay.
650
00:25:04,169 --> 00:25:05,569
- I don't think that's true.
651
00:25:05,670 --> 00:25:07,740
I think deep down,
you knew that I was straight
652
00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:09,309
and that's why you chose me.
653
00:25:09,374 --> 00:25:12,544
So you can act
all high and mighty,
654
00:25:12,644 --> 00:25:15,514
but I think you knew
exactly what you were doing.
655
00:25:15,580 --> 00:25:18,080
♪ ♪
656
00:25:18,183 --> 00:25:19,823
Goodbye, Cary.
657
00:25:19,885 --> 00:25:23,515
♪ ♪
658
00:25:26,358 --> 00:25:29,228
- You guys can't tell anyoneI fucked Damian Davis.
659
00:25:29,327 --> 00:25:32,157
Apparently, it got outthat I fucked Damian Davis.
660
00:25:32,230 --> 00:25:33,870
- Brooke fucked Damian Davis!
661
00:25:35,567 --> 00:25:37,267
- So as you can see,
662
00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:40,169
these are videos from
three separate Lyft drivers.
663
00:25:40,238 --> 00:25:43,838
- Who, of course, are little
human beings up there.
664
00:25:43,909 --> 00:25:45,179
- Yes.
- [clears throat]
665
00:25:45,243 --> 00:25:46,753
- And if I had to guess,
666
00:25:46,845 --> 00:25:49,575
it's that energy that
made them send us the tapes.
667
00:25:49,681 --> 00:25:51,121
- I can see that.
668
00:25:51,216 --> 00:25:53,586
So how much do I owe?
669
00:25:56,054 --> 00:25:57,624
[chuckles nervously]
670
00:25:57,722 --> 00:25:59,622
[gasps]
671
00:25:59,724 --> 00:26:00,964
Oh, my God!
672
00:26:01,059 --> 00:26:03,259
How am I supposed
to get you all this money?
673
00:26:06,097 --> 00:26:08,197
- Hello, and welcome
to "Pat Tac Toe."
674
00:26:08,266 --> 00:26:10,896
I'm your host, Tic Dubek.
[cheers and applause]
675
00:26:10,969 --> 00:26:13,409
- She's just warming up.
She'll get better.
676
00:26:13,471 --> 00:26:14,971
- No worries.
677
00:26:15,073 --> 00:26:16,443
We'll just bring her in ADR
that line this weekend.
678
00:26:16,541 --> 00:26:18,141
- Okay, perfect.
679
00:26:22,447 --> 00:26:25,417
[Delibes' "Lakmé"]
680
00:26:25,483 --> 00:26:32,593
♪ ♪
46852
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