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1
00:00:03,162 --> 00:00:04,428
I think it's really sweet
2
00:00:04,453 --> 00:00:07,059
that you're throwing this
jewelry party for Tinsley.
3
00:00:07,084 --> 00:00:09,549
I want my best friend
and my girlfriend
4
00:00:09,574 --> 00:00:11,402
to be able to hang out together.
5
00:00:11,427 --> 00:00:14,970
We can. I mean, sure, it didn't
go great at that sip 'n' paint.
6
00:00:15,023 --> 00:00:17,765
I brought lemonade,
she brought Banksy.
7
00:00:17,790 --> 00:00:20,324
And you called her
Porsche a "Porsh."
8
00:00:20,349 --> 00:00:22,438
Only poor people do that.
9
00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:24,589
But this is gonna be perfect.
10
00:00:24,719 --> 00:00:27,548
- Just three girlfriends making friendship bracelets.
- Mm.
11
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:30,334
- Yeah.
- What could go wrong?
12
00:00:31,018 --> 00:00:33,893
Sorry to barge, but can
someone help with this?
13
00:00:33,918 --> 00:00:35,398
Oh, I'll help.
14
00:00:35,483 --> 00:00:37,725
- I love helping friends.
- Wonderful.
15
00:00:37,750 --> 00:00:40,188
Just bring it in and
put it on the ottoman.
16
00:00:40,213 --> 00:00:43,303
BOTH: Mwah. Mwah. Mwah.
17
00:00:43,328 --> 00:00:47,195
Oh, what is in here? Bricks?
18
00:00:47,220 --> 00:00:49,788
No! Diamonds.
19
00:00:49,813 --> 00:00:52,399
TINSLEY: Good
morning, Tinsley.
20
00:00:52,424 --> 00:00:56,011
You're lovelier
than Princess Dian�.
21
00:00:56,072 --> 00:00:58,437
Whose booty did you have
to plunder to get these?
22
00:01:00,140 --> 00:01:01,713
They're for the jewelry party.
23
00:01:02,710 --> 00:01:05,670
Where we dust our
jewels. [scoffs]
24
00:01:06,761 --> 00:01:10,852
But I thought...
friendship bracelets.
25
00:01:10,983 --> 00:01:12,245
Made of string?
26
00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:14,378
String isn't jewels.
27
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:16,771
You do know that string
isn't jewels, don't you?
28
00:01:16,902 --> 00:01:18,207
We can do both.
29
00:01:18,338 --> 00:01:20,297
You start weaving,
and we'll start
30
00:01:20,427 --> 00:01:22,907
dusting this necklace that looks
like it came from the Titanic.
31
00:01:22,951 --> 00:01:25,344
- [laughs]
- It did.
32
00:01:27,433 --> 00:01:29,741
Wow! These are beautiful.
33
00:01:29,871 --> 00:01:30,872
TINSLEY: You like those?
34
00:01:31,003 --> 00:01:32,396
- Take them.
- Where?
35
00:01:33,484 --> 00:01:36,182
Oh, you mean, like,
to have. [laughs]
36
00:01:36,313 --> 00:01:38,358
- No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
- Please!
37
00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:39,794
No, I couldn't possibly.
38
00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:41,492
I mean, where would
I even put them?
39
00:01:41,622 --> 00:01:43,842
My earring baggie is already
pretty full. [laughs]
40
00:01:43,972 --> 00:01:45,451
Take the earrings.
41
00:01:45,582 --> 00:01:48,063
We'll get you another baggie.
42
00:01:48,194 --> 00:01:50,936
Carly, I swear, if
you don't take those,
43
00:01:51,066 --> 00:01:53,460
I'm gonna toss them out
the window at pigeons.
44
00:01:53,591 --> 00:01:55,375
I beg you.
45
00:01:55,506 --> 00:01:57,638
Harper, have you
ever seen me beg?
46
00:01:57,769 --> 00:02:00,772
Not in a way that is appropriate
to talk about right now.
47
00:02:00,902 --> 00:02:04,732
Carly, say yes. Yes! Or yup.
48
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:09,911
Or yeah, or suredledee-doo, or
whatever you 99 percenters say.
49
00:02:10,956 --> 00:02:14,525
Okay. [laughs] Suredledee-doo.
50
00:02:14,655 --> 00:02:17,441
Oh, wonderful. This
calls for champagne.
51
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:20,052
Wow. I hope these
weren't expensive.
52
00:02:20,183 --> 00:02:21,532
I think they were, like, 80.
53
00:02:21,662 --> 00:02:23,577
$80?
54
00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:25,710
No. $80,000.
55
00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:28,408
$80,000?
56
00:02:28,539 --> 00:02:29,540
I can't.
57
00:02:29,670 --> 00:02:31,411
Pirates!
58
00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:34,675
? I know ?
59
00:02:34,806 --> 00:02:36,503
? You see ?
60
00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,810
? Somehow the world
will change for me ?
61
00:02:38,940 --> 00:02:41,943
? And be so wonderful ?
62
00:02:42,074 --> 00:02:45,598
? So wake up the
members of my nation ?
63
00:02:45,730 --> 00:02:47,949
? It's your time to be ?
64
00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,952
? There's no chance
unless you take one ?
65
00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:53,259
? And the time to see
the brighter side ?
66
00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:57,002
? Of every situation ?
67
00:02:57,132 --> 00:02:59,004
? Some things are meant to be ?
68
00:02:59,134 --> 00:03:02,050
? So give your best and
leave the rest to me. ?
69
00:03:05,793 --> 00:03:08,753
And Tinsley was just so happy
to sip on her fabulous wine
70
00:03:08,883 --> 00:03:10,537
and polish her fabulous jewels.
71
00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:13,192
- It was all just so...
- Fabulous?
72
00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:15,238
Exactly.
73
00:03:15,368 --> 00:03:17,414
A perfect party.
Thanks, Carly.
74
00:03:17,544 --> 00:03:19,416
I finally feel like
you two are gelling.
75
00:03:19,546 --> 00:03:21,548
- It couldn't have gone better.
- Totally.
76
00:03:21,679 --> 00:03:23,855
- I only fainted once.
- [laughs loudly]
77
00:03:23,985 --> 00:03:25,683
Hey. That's not funny.
78
00:03:25,813 --> 00:03:28,207
- I could have hit my head.
- You didhit your head.
79
00:03:28,338 --> 00:03:29,600
What?
80
00:03:30,601 --> 00:03:33,299
No, I'm not laughing at
your hilarious head injury.
81
00:03:33,430 --> 00:03:37,259
Did you know if you type
"funny cat videos" into Google,
82
00:03:37,390 --> 00:03:39,610
there's a lot of stuff?
83
00:03:40,741 --> 00:03:42,830
I'm making a piece for
the Seattle Cat Museum's
84
00:03:42,961 --> 00:03:45,137
- fundraising gala.
- Hmm.
85
00:03:45,268 --> 00:03:46,878
"The 20th annual Catillion
86
00:03:47,008 --> 00:03:49,315
benefiting the cats of Seattle."
87
00:03:49,446 --> 00:03:51,317
This year's guest of
honor is someone named
88
00:03:51,448 --> 00:03:53,406
-Archduke Lucius
Snibbington. SPENCER: Hmm.
89
00:03:53,537 --> 00:03:54,842
Snibbles the cat?!
90
00:03:54,973 --> 00:03:56,540
Oh, my God, oh, my
God, oh, my God!
91
00:03:56,670 --> 00:03:58,455
Spencer's gonna meet Snibbles.
92
00:03:58,585 --> 00:04:00,868
Why don't you come with? You and
Freddie can meet Snibbles, too.
93
00:04:00,892 --> 00:04:03,808
Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God!
94
00:04:03,938 --> 00:04:05,568
Spencer, how about you
and Millicent just go?
95
00:04:05,592 --> 00:04:06,917
I feel like you two should
spend more time together.
96
00:04:06,941 --> 00:04:08,813
Ah, we just hugged.
97
00:04:09,814 --> 00:04:12,053
I got to go. Tinsley's making
her servants bite each other,
98
00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:14,253
and I got $20 on Wellington.
99
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:16,473
Thanks again for
the party, Carly.
100
00:04:16,603 --> 00:04:17,754
And I'm glad you got
a little something
101
00:04:17,778 --> 00:04:19,345
for yourself, too.
102
00:04:19,476 --> 00:04:21,913
Yes, a little something.
103
00:04:22,043 --> 00:04:23,915
A meaningless trinket.
104
00:04:24,045 --> 00:04:26,352
A trifle, really. Bye. [laughs]
105
00:04:26,483 --> 00:04:28,398
It is not a trifle!
106
00:04:28,528 --> 00:04:32,140
I am in a deep, dark
hole of anxiety.
107
00:04:32,271 --> 00:04:34,404
Like the summer I
spent in that well?
108
00:04:34,534 --> 00:04:39,191
No, like the night Tinsley
gave me $80,000 earrings.
109
00:04:39,322 --> 00:04:41,454
- Lemony Snicket.
- Whoa, mama. - Pirates.
110
00:04:41,585 --> 00:04:43,543
What am I supposed
to do with them?
111
00:04:43,674 --> 00:04:45,415
Not go outside, that's for sure.
112
00:04:45,545 --> 00:04:47,567
You're just going to leave
them in a drawer forever?
113
00:04:47,591 --> 00:04:49,680
No! I have to buy a safe.
114
00:04:49,810 --> 00:04:53,118
I'm seeing a Groupon
for two-for-one safes.
115
00:04:53,248 --> 00:04:54,946
Does anyone else need a safe?
116
00:04:55,076 --> 00:04:57,601
Hey, you're
overthinking this, okay?
117
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,883
I'm sure Tinsley wanted you
to have the earrings, and...
118
00:04:59,907 --> 00:05:01,561
Holy friggin' what?!
119
00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:04,869
You're right. You have
no business with those.
120
00:05:04,999 --> 00:05:06,784
- Maybe I can borrow...
- Get back!
121
00:05:07,872 --> 00:05:09,874
These are precious gems.
122
00:05:11,702 --> 00:05:14,531
Uh-oh. Look, she's
gone full Gollum!
123
00:05:14,661 --> 00:05:16,576
How can I sleep
in these earrings
124
00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:19,274
knowing how much good
$80,000 could do?
125
00:05:19,405 --> 00:05:20,605
You're going to sleep in them?
126
00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:22,539
No, I'm going to leave them out
127
00:05:22,669 --> 00:05:26,934
for the burglars who watched me
get two safes delivered. Think.
128
00:05:28,327 --> 00:05:31,156
Look at these poor cats,
living on the streets,
129
00:05:31,286 --> 00:05:33,419
probably turning
to booze and drugs.
130
00:05:33,550 --> 00:05:36,291
Yeah. Just like the
ones in the musical.
131
00:05:36,422 --> 00:05:38,250
I know.
132
00:05:38,381 --> 00:05:40,818
I can donate the earrings
to the silent auction.
133
00:05:40,948 --> 00:05:43,298
Then the cats get food
and shelter, I can relax,
134
00:05:43,429 --> 00:05:45,692
and Tinsley never has to know.
135
00:05:45,823 --> 00:05:48,695
Goodbye, my precious.
136
00:05:48,826 --> 00:05:50,654
Great. Let's go down
to the Cat Museum
137
00:05:50,784 --> 00:05:52,743
and make the donation right now.
138
00:05:52,873 --> 00:05:54,788
I bet Snibbles will want
to meet the young girl
139
00:05:54,919 --> 00:05:56,113
who gave such an amazing gift.
140
00:05:56,137 --> 00:05:57,661
I'm that girl.
141
00:05:57,791 --> 00:06:00,185
We'll discuss the
details in the car.
142
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:09,063
How long did it take me
to get that smoothie?
143
00:06:09,194 --> 00:06:10,935
[grunting]
144
00:06:12,284 --> 00:06:13,503
Greetings, peasant.
145
00:06:13,633 --> 00:06:15,243
I present to you the
newly-constructed
146
00:06:15,374 --> 00:06:17,115
Edin-fur-a Castle.
147
00:06:17,245 --> 00:06:18,986
Ah, impressive.
148
00:06:19,117 --> 00:06:20,553
Why aren't you
coming to the gala?
149
00:06:20,684 --> 00:06:22,364
Is it because you don't
look good in a tux?
150
00:06:22,468 --> 00:06:24,078
I look bad in a men's tux.
151
00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:26,385
I look great in a youth XL.
152
00:06:26,516 --> 00:06:28,256
It's actually because...
153
00:06:28,387 --> 00:06:30,694
I'm kind of afraid of cats.
154
00:06:30,824 --> 00:06:32,957
I guess it all started
when I was a kid.
155
00:06:33,087 --> 00:06:34,437
Remember that cat
that was trapped
156
00:06:34,567 --> 00:06:35,916
in the walls of the Bushwell?
157
00:06:36,047 --> 00:06:38,571
I used to hear it
yowling in the night.
158
00:06:38,702 --> 00:06:40,225
Sometimes I still can.
159
00:06:40,355 --> 00:06:42,270
You know what you need?
160
00:06:42,401 --> 00:06:44,795
Feline exposure therapy.
161
00:06:44,925 --> 00:06:46,579
- What is feline expos...?
- [yells]
162
00:06:46,710 --> 00:06:48,581
[screams]
163
00:06:48,712 --> 00:06:50,670
I don't like it!
164
00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:52,367
I don't like it.
165
00:06:52,498 --> 00:06:55,500
Well, then you're gonna hate
when I rub my ass on you.
166
00:06:56,894 --> 00:06:58,504
That's what cats do.
167
00:07:01,942 --> 00:07:04,858
And this is the
Paw-trait Gallery,
168
00:07:04,989 --> 00:07:06,860
where we'll be hosting
our silent auction
169
00:07:06,991 --> 00:07:09,210
and our meet-and-greet
with our VIP...
170
00:07:09,341 --> 00:07:12,518
Very important pussycat.
171
00:07:12,649 --> 00:07:14,607
Is that where
Snibbles is gonna be?
172
00:07:14,738 --> 00:07:16,653
Why don't you go
take a closer look?
173
00:07:16,783 --> 00:07:20,395
This is the best day ever.
174
00:07:20,526 --> 00:07:22,528
Wow, Myrtle.
175
00:07:22,659 --> 00:07:24,619
Thank you for that private
tour of the Cat Museum.
176
00:07:24,661 --> 00:07:26,706
I had no idea there
was a cat pope.
177
00:07:26,837 --> 00:07:28,839
Who do you think
converted the Swedes?
178
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:33,844
I'm just so relieved that
you accepted my donation.
179
00:07:33,974 --> 00:07:37,238
$80,000 earrings
are just not me.
180
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:40,633
I mean, who am I? The
cat pope's mistress?
181
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:42,461
We need more young people
182
00:07:42,592 --> 00:07:44,463
to take an interest
in feline issues.
183
00:07:44,594 --> 00:07:48,772
It can't all be skateboards
and climate change.
184
00:07:50,034 --> 00:07:52,732
Your donation will save at
least a dozen street cats
185
00:07:52,863 --> 00:07:54,865
from booze and drugs.
186
00:07:57,171 --> 00:07:59,086
God bless you, dear.
187
00:08:01,654 --> 00:08:02,960
Wow, Carly.
188
00:08:03,090 --> 00:08:04,807
You got me behind-the-scenes
Snibbles content,
189
00:08:04,831 --> 00:08:06,093
and you helped a charity.
190
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:08,139
Color me almost impressed.
191
00:08:08,269 --> 00:08:11,534
That was the sweetest
backhanded compliment ever.
192
00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:14,885
I did a good thing.
193
00:08:16,974 --> 00:08:19,672
I did a good thing.
194
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:21,544
You did a very bad thing!
195
00:08:21,674 --> 00:08:23,546
A very bad thing!
196
00:08:28,899 --> 00:08:30,465
She didn't even
want the earrings.
197
00:08:30,596 --> 00:08:32,313
She literally said she was
going to throw them at pigeons.
198
00:08:32,337 --> 00:08:34,731
That's just an expression she
overuses because she thinks
199
00:08:34,861 --> 00:08:37,385
that's what regular people
do with their trash!
200
00:08:37,515 --> 00:08:40,258
She probably doesn't even
remember the earrings.
201
00:08:40,388 --> 00:08:43,914
And besides, there's no
way she will ever find out
202
00:08:44,044 --> 00:08:45,326
that I donated them
to the Catillion.
203
00:08:45,350 --> 00:08:49,267
[gasps] We're all
going to the Catillion!
204
00:08:49,397 --> 00:08:51,182
What? How?
205
00:08:51,312 --> 00:08:52,357
What?
206
00:08:52,487 --> 00:08:54,098
How?
207
00:08:54,228 --> 00:08:57,362
Where is that little beb�
you spend so much time with?
208
00:08:57,492 --> 00:09:01,279
Millicent? Homework, a movie.
Some type of movie homework.
209
00:09:01,409 --> 00:09:03,020
I don't know.
210
00:09:03,150 --> 00:09:06,371
You're going to make
a great second mom.
211
00:09:06,501 --> 00:09:08,416
Well, drat. I got stuck
212
00:09:08,547 --> 00:09:10,418
in some chitty-chatty
with the little thing,
213
00:09:10,549 --> 00:09:13,247
and she was droning on and
on about some Catillion.
214
00:09:13,378 --> 00:09:16,294
So I bought a seat on the
board of the cat charity
215
00:09:16,424 --> 00:09:19,471
and a VIP table at the gala
so we can all go with her.
216
00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:23,693
The whole friend group,
which includes me. [laughs]
217
00:09:23,823 --> 00:09:26,434
Oh, good. The thing I
wanted so desperately
218
00:09:26,565 --> 00:09:29,350
to happen is happening.
219
00:09:30,656 --> 00:09:34,617
And the best part is, you'll
get to debut your new earrings.
220
00:09:34,747 --> 00:09:36,140
Do you know what this calls for?
221
00:09:36,270 --> 00:09:40,100
- More champagne?
- More champagne! Oh!
222
00:09:40,231 --> 00:09:43,451
- See? We're clicking.
- [laughs nervously]
223
00:09:43,582 --> 00:09:45,429
Harper, I promise you I
will get those earrings back
224
00:09:45,453 --> 00:09:46,803
beforethe gala.
225
00:09:46,933 --> 00:09:50,023
And I promise
you... you'd better.
226
00:09:54,811 --> 00:09:56,813
Spencer? You here?
227
00:09:58,292 --> 00:10:00,730
Dude, why are the lights off?
228
00:10:00,860 --> 00:10:02,819
- [meows]
- [screams gibberish]
229
00:10:02,949 --> 00:10:04,951
Let the exposure therapy begin.
230
00:10:05,082 --> 00:10:07,084
Check this out.
231
00:10:10,217 --> 00:10:12,698
- [groans] No, thank you.
- Okay.
232
00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:14,047
? La-la-la-la... ?
233
00:10:14,178 --> 00:10:15,440
- Attack!
- [shrieks]
234
00:10:15,570 --> 00:10:17,268
No, no, stop!
235
00:10:17,398 --> 00:10:19,052
No!
236
00:10:20,358 --> 00:10:21,402
Spencer!
237
00:10:22,490 --> 00:10:24,492
No, no, don't you do it.
238
00:10:24,623 --> 00:10:25,711
Stop. You stop.
239
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,060
Don't you... Stop.
240
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:30,455
That was your vase.
241
00:10:30,585 --> 00:10:33,414
Meow! Okay, walk.
242
00:10:33,545 --> 00:10:35,329
[Freddie panting]
243
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:38,550
I'm doing this for
Millicent. Aah! Oh.
244
00:10:38,681 --> 00:10:40,528
I'm doing this for Millicent.
I'm doing this for Millicent.
245
00:10:40,552 --> 00:10:42,467
[both scream]
246
00:10:42,597 --> 00:10:44,817
How do you stop me from
scratching your face off?!
247
00:10:44,948 --> 00:10:47,211
- Answer now!
- I don't know!
248
00:10:47,341 --> 00:10:51,083
Take control, or I will
feast on your blood!
249
00:10:51,215 --> 00:10:53,260
Um... I'm in charge!
250
00:10:53,391 --> 00:10:55,045
- Excellent.
- What?!
251
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:58,222
You understand me a
little bit better now.
252
00:10:58,352 --> 00:11:00,224
You will do as I command!
253
00:11:00,354 --> 00:11:02,705
Oh, that was a mistake.
254
00:11:02,835 --> 00:11:03,880
Huh?
255
00:11:04,010 --> 00:11:07,187
- No! No!
- [laughing]
256
00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:09,059
- Yeah, what do I want?
- To ruin lives?
257
00:11:09,189 --> 00:11:11,278
To make me pee myself?
258
00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:13,977
- Why is this so fun for you?!
- [laughing]
259
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:16,066
[gasps] You want to play.
260
00:11:16,196 --> 00:11:18,155
That's exactly what I want.
261
00:11:18,285 --> 00:11:20,331
Does this mean I'm ready?
262
00:11:20,461 --> 00:11:23,943
- Not even close. Yay!
- No! No!
263
00:11:25,728 --> 00:11:28,513
It'll be easy to get
the earrings back.
264
00:11:28,643 --> 00:11:31,187
The little old lady in charge of
the auction is obsessed with me.
265
00:11:31,211 --> 00:11:33,083
Little old ladies always are.
266
00:11:33,213 --> 00:11:35,215
- It's 'cause we speak the same language.
- Oh.
267
00:11:35,346 --> 00:11:37,043
It's called Granny Chat.
268
00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:40,568
Sometimes I wonder
why we're friends.
269
00:11:40,699 --> 00:11:43,049
Okay, so I told
Tinsley all I wanted
270
00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:45,922
for our 14-week anniversary
was to reunite The Beatles.
271
00:11:46,052 --> 00:11:47,532
She doesn't know two
of them are dead,
272
00:11:47,662 --> 00:11:49,229
so we have some time.
273
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:51,449
You have to get
those earrings back,
274
00:11:51,579 --> 00:11:52,972
even if you have to steal them.
275
00:11:53,103 --> 00:11:56,802
Stealing? But that's... wrong.
276
00:11:58,064 --> 00:12:00,719
Why arewe friends?
277
00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:03,287
Carly Shay, my angel.
278
00:12:03,417 --> 00:12:04,723
[Carly laughs softly]
279
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:06,638
It's almost too easy.
280
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:08,031
Hi, Myrtle.
281
00:12:08,161 --> 00:12:11,469
Just in time. Look
what I had made.
282
00:12:11,599 --> 00:12:13,297
- Wow.
- I hope you don't mind,
283
00:12:13,427 --> 00:12:15,647
we photoshopped in
little Butterscotch.
284
00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:19,216
This tiny guy hasn't met a
street drug he doesn't like.
285
00:12:19,346 --> 00:12:22,132
I'm talking tango,
jackpot, study buddies,
286
00:12:22,262 --> 00:12:25,526
zow, kangaroo, Bob Cratchit.
287
00:12:26,832 --> 00:12:28,268
And thanks to your donation,
288
00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:30,836
we can finally afford
to send him to rehab.
289
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,838
Say "thank you," Butterscotch.
290
00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:35,188
[high-pitched voice]:
"I love you, Carly.
291
00:12:35,319 --> 00:12:39,062
You saved me when
no one else would."
292
00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:42,761
I love you, too, buddy.
293
00:12:42,892 --> 00:12:45,764
Okay, funny story
about the earrings.
294
00:12:46,634 --> 00:12:49,289
I kinda need 'em
back. [laughs]
295
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:51,378
Right?
296
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,598
So get this.
297
00:12:53,728 --> 00:12:57,297
My friend who gave me the
earrings would be really mad
298
00:12:57,428 --> 00:12:59,430
if she knew that I
just gave them away,
299
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:02,128
and I don't want that. [laughs]
300
00:13:02,259 --> 00:13:04,391
I'll tell you what
you don't want.
301
00:13:04,522 --> 00:13:07,177
You don't want to wake up
in the middle of the night,
302
00:13:07,307 --> 00:13:09,570
cold and alone on a
road you've never seen,
303
00:13:09,701 --> 00:13:11,703
with no phone, no car,
304
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:15,750
no one to call for help,
and no way to get home.
305
00:13:16,795 --> 00:13:18,884
In what situation
would that happen?
306
00:13:19,885 --> 00:13:24,324
Let the cats keep the emeralds,
and you never have to find out.
307
00:13:24,455 --> 00:13:26,370
Come on, Butterscotch.
308
00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:30,417
Let's finish setting
up our auction.
309
00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:36,946
Bad news. There is
no way that I can...
310
00:13:37,076 --> 00:13:40,863
Gah! Tinsley! Gah!
311
00:13:40,993 --> 00:13:42,734
You look so beautiful.
312
00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:45,650
Gah! So do you.
313
00:13:45,780 --> 00:13:46,888
Is that a thing
we're saying now?
314
00:13:46,912 --> 00:13:48,435
We're giving it a spin.
315
00:13:48,566 --> 00:13:51,438
Gah! Did you hear
about The Beatles?
316
00:13:51,569 --> 00:13:53,397
So sad.
317
00:13:53,527 --> 00:13:56,574
Apparently, two of 'em died.
318
00:13:56,704 --> 00:14:00,404
Carly, I just want to say,
about the earrings I gave you...
319
00:14:00,534 --> 00:14:03,798
Oh, you mean my most favorite
gift I've ever received? Go on.
320
00:14:03,929 --> 00:14:06,410
They're my way of saying
how much it means to me
321
00:14:06,540 --> 00:14:09,065
that you've made such an
effort to be my friend.
322
00:14:09,195 --> 00:14:11,458
- Oh.
- Whenever you wear them,
323
00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:15,898
think of my Nan� Edn�,
who died clutching them.
324
00:14:16,028 --> 00:14:18,726
Her most prized possession.
325
00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:20,903
Toodles.
326
00:14:22,252 --> 00:14:24,994
I'm gonna steal those earrings.
327
00:14:25,124 --> 00:14:27,170
That's why we're friends.
328
00:14:33,524 --> 00:14:35,308
We're gonna pull a jewel
heist at a cat ball?
329
00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:37,963
I guess I owe that carnival
fortune teller an apology.
330
00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:40,966
She told me I'd die
in a parade accident.
331
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:43,534
Doesn't sound so bad right now.
332
00:14:43,664 --> 00:14:45,816
Okay, Harper, you distract
Tinsley from the auction table
333
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:47,668
while we pull the job.
334
00:14:47,799 --> 00:14:49,061
Pull the job?
335
00:14:49,192 --> 00:14:50,541
That's how criminals talk, doll.
336
00:14:50,671 --> 00:14:52,717
With moxie.
337
00:14:52,847 --> 00:14:54,260
[British accent]:
Oi, can I talk like
338
00:14:54,284 --> 00:14:56,155
I'm in a Guy
Ritchie movie, love?
339
00:14:57,765 --> 00:14:59,637
[regular voice]: Okay,
I'll talk like me.
340
00:14:59,767 --> 00:15:00,986
Millicent, you're on Myrtle.
341
00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:03,423
- Granny Chat her up.
- What?
342
00:15:03,554 --> 00:15:05,512
Talk about things she
knows. Why is it so cold?
343
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:08,385
What's wrong with your
generation? World War I.
344
00:15:08,515 --> 00:15:10,430
I'll buy the earrings for you
345
00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:12,519
if you can name three
countries in that war.
346
00:15:13,564 --> 00:15:16,959
Spencer, you're gonna create
a massive distraction.
347
00:15:17,089 --> 00:15:18,873
- I was think...
- Bup, bup, bup.
348
00:15:19,004 --> 00:15:20,808
I don't need tips on how to
become the center of attention.
349
00:15:20,832 --> 00:15:22,157
Carly, you saw how
I overshadowed you
350
00:15:22,181 --> 00:15:24,705
in all of our family photos.
351
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:28,274
You don't need me to do
anything with cats, do you?
352
00:15:28,405 --> 00:15:31,016
Not that that would be a problem
if you did. I'm very brave.
353
00:15:31,147 --> 00:15:33,236
You're gonna hack into
the museum's security,
354
00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:34,686
disable the alarms
and the cameras
355
00:15:34,802 --> 00:15:37,240
so I don't get caught. You
have your laptop, right?
356
00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:39,590
What? Why would I bring
a computer to a...?
357
00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:41,374
Yeah, I brought it.
358
00:15:41,505 --> 00:15:43,507
Once the alarm's off,
I'll grab the earrings,
359
00:15:43,637 --> 00:15:45,485
wear them while I chat with
Tinsley, fake appendicitis,
360
00:15:45,509 --> 00:15:47,182
and then put the earrings
back on the table
361
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:48,729
just in time for the auction.
362
00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:50,079
Harper wins, the cats win,
363
00:15:50,208 --> 00:15:52,211
even that bitch Myrtle wins.
364
00:15:52,342 --> 00:15:53,647
It's foolproof.
365
00:15:53,778 --> 00:15:56,694
I foresee no issues
with this plan at all.
366
00:16:00,828 --> 00:16:01,960
You all set?
367
00:16:02,091 --> 00:16:05,181
I am cool as a
cucumber, daddy-o.
368
00:16:05,311 --> 00:16:07,226
Aw. Thanks for getting
in on my moxie.
369
00:16:07,357 --> 00:16:08,314
[both chuckle]
370
00:16:08,445 --> 00:16:09,315
You're a square gee.
371
00:16:09,446 --> 00:16:10,838
Oh. [laughs]
372
00:16:10,969 --> 00:16:14,581
[classical music playing]
373
00:16:15,669 --> 00:16:16,801
Keep it together, Mills.
374
00:16:16,931 --> 00:16:18,846
He's just a cat.
375
00:16:19,891 --> 00:16:20,848
Lower your eyes.
376
00:16:20,979 --> 00:16:23,155
You should all be bowing.
377
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:32,773
Remember when you said more
young people need to take
378
00:16:32,904 --> 00:16:35,776
an interest in feline issues?
I'm 12, start talking.
379
00:16:35,907 --> 00:16:39,563
It all began a long time ago
when a young cat named Petey
380
00:16:39,693 --> 00:16:43,088
helped the Wright
Brothers invent jazz.
381
00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:49,051
Here's to the kitties
that live in our cities.
382
00:16:49,181 --> 00:16:51,140
Now let's show them our...
383
00:16:51,270 --> 00:16:53,142
- Harper!
- Generosities.
384
00:16:53,272 --> 00:16:54,404
[Tinsley laughs]
385
00:16:54,534 --> 00:16:55,579
[hisses]
386
00:16:55,708 --> 00:16:57,146
[growls]
387
00:17:00,584 --> 00:17:02,803
Adios, cameras.
388
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:06,938
Why is he looking at me?
389
00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:12,726
[Scottish accent]:
Welcome, lads and ladies.
390
00:17:12,857 --> 00:17:15,599
I know you're all here to
honor Archduke Snibbington,
391
00:17:15,728 --> 00:17:20,690
aka Snibbles, but you've
not yet met his court.
392
00:17:20,821 --> 00:17:23,389
[cats mewing]
393
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:24,584
- [Freddie screams]
- [crowd exclaiming]
394
00:17:24,608 --> 00:17:26,871
[Spencer laughs]
395
00:17:27,001 --> 00:17:29,482
Yes, run, Cat Sajak!
396
00:17:29,613 --> 00:17:31,484
Go, Puma Thurman!
397
00:17:31,615 --> 00:17:34,139
Flee, Leonardo DeCatsmeow!
398
00:17:34,270 --> 00:17:37,273
- Oh, I am their god!
- [mewing]
399
00:17:39,362 --> 00:17:41,364
Okay, you mugs.
400
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:43,496
It's go time.
401
00:17:43,627 --> 00:17:45,716
Need to disable... alarm.
402
00:17:45,846 --> 00:17:47,761
[cat yowls]
403
00:17:47,892 --> 00:17:50,808
They just want to play.
They just want to play.
404
00:17:51,983 --> 00:17:54,855
- [mewing]
- [Freddie whimpering]
405
00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:58,337
[alarm sounding]
406
00:17:58,468 --> 00:18:00,557
Thief, robber,
407
00:18:00,687 --> 00:18:03,081
dog lover for all I know.
408
00:18:04,038 --> 00:18:06,867
Harper, why are my earrings
at the silent auction?
409
00:18:06,998 --> 00:18:09,131
[gasps] Did Carly
give them away?!
410
00:18:09,261 --> 00:18:11,872
I can't lie to you, my sweet.
411
00:18:12,003 --> 00:18:14,310
I have no idea.
412
00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:17,487
- Tinsley, I can explain.
- This one really hurt, Carly.
413
00:18:17,617 --> 00:18:19,793
And I've had Gloria
Vanderbilt spike a volleyball
414
00:18:19,924 --> 00:18:21,795
straight into my face!
415
00:18:24,755 --> 00:18:27,540
Well, feline exposure
therapy was a failure.
416
00:18:27,671 --> 00:18:30,064
And I rubbed my butt
on you and everything.
417
00:18:30,195 --> 00:18:32,458
Yeah, you're a good friend.
418
00:18:32,589 --> 00:18:34,852
- Aw.
- I know. I don't say it enough,
419
00:18:34,982 --> 00:18:36,743
- but I really do appreciate you trying...
- No, shut up, it's a cat.
420
00:18:36,767 --> 00:18:38,247
- What?
- [meows]
421
00:18:40,423 --> 00:18:41,511
It worked!
422
00:18:41,641 --> 00:18:43,208
[guttural groaning]
423
00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:45,645
Okay, I can see by your
face it did not work.
424
00:18:45,776 --> 00:18:48,561
This hell fiend just
crawled into my lap
425
00:18:48,692 --> 00:18:50,694
because I'm holding his cushion.
426
00:18:50,824 --> 00:18:54,785
Get a camera and Millicent.
Get Millicent right now!
427
00:18:56,090 --> 00:18:59,268
So, nine lives, huh?
428
00:18:59,398 --> 00:19:01,966
That's nice to have
in your back pocket.
429
00:19:02,096 --> 00:19:05,883
You found Snibbles!
430
00:19:06,753 --> 00:19:09,495
This is the best day ever,
and you're the best dad ever.
431
00:19:09,626 --> 00:19:11,018
[Freddie gasps]
432
00:19:11,149 --> 00:19:12,281
SPENCER: Okay.
433
00:19:12,411 --> 00:19:15,719
Great. Now let's do a silly one.
434
00:19:15,849 --> 00:19:17,242
[Freddie whimpers]
435
00:19:21,638 --> 00:19:23,509
We can still get
the earrings back.
436
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:26,425
Do you know how to do
an Act of Congress?
437
00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:27,905
Please stop.
438
00:19:28,993 --> 00:19:30,603
I appreciate you trying,
439
00:19:30,734 --> 00:19:32,625
but you and Tinsley are just
too different to be friends.
440
00:19:32,649 --> 00:19:34,041
It's fine.
441
00:19:34,172 --> 00:19:37,175
No. We can make this work.
442
00:19:37,306 --> 00:19:38,761
I'll just hang out with
you two separately.
443
00:19:38,785 --> 00:19:40,744
Tinsley and I will
vacation in St. Barts,
444
00:19:40,874 --> 00:19:43,181
and you and I will throw
our trash at pigeons.
445
00:19:44,704 --> 00:19:47,098
You are easily one of the most
awful people I've ever met.
446
00:19:47,229 --> 00:19:49,753
You have ruined this event.
447
00:19:49,883 --> 00:19:53,452
And if Butterscotch
relapses, that's on you.
448
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,847
Dang, no need to bring
Butterscotch into this.
449
00:19:56,977 --> 00:19:58,370
Who's Butterscotch?
450
00:19:58,501 --> 00:20:01,286
Carly's tiny boyfriend
with the fedoras?
451
00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:03,767
Perhaps you're really
the one to blame.
452
00:20:03,897 --> 00:20:06,465
We never should have given
you a seat on the board.
453
00:20:06,596 --> 00:20:09,036
I was beguiled by your pretty
face and your grotesque fortune,
454
00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:10,532
but apparently you
don't have the heart
455
00:20:10,556 --> 00:20:12,210
or the integrity
to represent our...
456
00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:15,082
Myrtle, that is enough!
457
00:20:15,213 --> 00:20:17,084
You can say what
you want about me,
458
00:20:17,215 --> 00:20:21,393
but Tinsley has been nothing
but generous and gracious to me,
459
00:20:21,524 --> 00:20:23,787
to your charity,
and to the cats.
460
00:20:23,917 --> 00:20:27,312
You are...
461
00:20:28,748 --> 00:20:29,923
mean!
462
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,361
[hisses]
463
00:20:33,927 --> 00:20:36,365
Tinsley, I am so sorry
464
00:20:36,495 --> 00:20:38,255
that I gave away your
grandmother's earrings.
465
00:20:38,367 --> 00:20:39,967
All I ever wanted was
for the three of us
466
00:20:40,064 --> 00:20:41,848
to be able to hang out together.
467
00:20:41,979 --> 00:20:44,068
Carly, you strange little duck.
468
00:20:44,198 --> 00:20:45,809
We come from different worlds,
469
00:20:45,939 --> 00:20:47,859
but you stood up for me,
and that's what matters.
470
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:50,137
That's what matters? It would
have been cool to know that
471
00:20:50,161 --> 00:20:51,641
before I committed
grand larceny.
472
00:20:51,771 --> 00:20:54,470
You didn't commit.
You attempted.
473
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,240
Well, I'm committed
to buying the earrings
474
00:20:56,341 --> 00:20:58,517
for my dear friend Carly.
475
00:20:58,648 --> 00:21:01,128
Nan� Edn� would have
loved your moxie.
476
00:21:01,259 --> 00:21:05,089
Well, I bet Nan� and nan-I
would have been great friends.
477
00:21:05,219 --> 00:21:08,788
She also said you can have the
earrings. So what do you say?
478
00:21:10,007 --> 00:21:12,127
I know, but now I'm gonna
have to get a bigger baggie.
479
00:21:13,053 --> 00:21:14,925
I mean, thank you!
480
00:21:15,055 --> 00:21:17,144
Oh! [laughs]
481
00:21:19,190 --> 00:21:21,845
- You look beautiful.
- Thanks.
482
00:21:21,975 --> 00:21:23,542
- I feel beautiful.
- Hmm.
483
00:21:23,673 --> 00:21:25,588
I get so tired of the
food at these things.
484
00:21:25,718 --> 00:21:27,067
It's always the same.
485
00:21:27,198 --> 00:21:30,680
Yes, the same old...
saucer of milk?
486
00:21:30,810 --> 00:21:32,986
How are we supposed to...?
487
00:21:33,117 --> 00:21:35,598
[gulping]
488
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:37,556
I like it.
489
00:21:40,646 --> 00:21:42,387
[all gulping]
490
00:22:13,070 --> 00:22:15,072
Ooh!
491
00:22:15,122 --> 00:22:19,672
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