All language subtitles for Based.on.a.True.Story.S01E06.WEB

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,421 --> 00:00:20,381 Babe, we did it! Oh, my God, okay. 2 00:00:20,423 --> 00:00:21,591 - Here's another one. You ready? - Yeah. 3 00:00:21,632 --> 00:00:23,551 "VICE Magazine," "'Based on a True Story,' 4 00:00:23,593 --> 00:00:24,677 real or hoax? 5 00:00:24,719 --> 00:00:25,803 The podcast that's gripped the nation." 6 00:00:25,845 --> 00:00:26,971 Holy shit. 7 00:00:27,013 --> 00:00:28,389 - Keep going. - Yep, we got one 8 00:00:28,431 --> 00:00:30,349 from BuzzFeed: "Top ten moments you can't miss 9 00:00:30,391 --> 00:00:32,226 from 'Based on a True Story.'" 10 00:00:32,268 --> 00:00:34,228 - Love you, BuzzFeed. - Another amazing one. 11 00:00:34,270 --> 00:00:35,354 "New York Times Magazine," 12 00:00:35,396 --> 00:00:37,023 "Bill Kristol and Noam Chomsky debate, 13 00:00:37,065 --> 00:00:39,817 'What does "Based on a True Story" say about America?'" 14 00:00:39,859 --> 00:00:41,527 It says, the best... 15 00:00:41,569 --> 00:00:43,404 - country ever! - Oh, my God. 16 00:00:43,446 --> 00:00:46,407 Charli D'Amelio tweeted "My new favorite obsession! 17 00:00:46,449 --> 00:00:48,242 #basedonatruestory!" 18 00:00:48,284 --> 00:00:49,744 - Who's Charli D'Amelio? - I loved her 19 00:00:49,786 --> 00:00:51,412 from "Dancing with the Stars." She won last year... 20 00:00:51,454 --> 00:00:52,538 - Okay. - But she also has, like, 21 00:00:52,580 --> 00:00:54,457 150 million followers on TikTok, 22 00:00:54,499 --> 00:00:56,042 so we are fucking viral, babe! 23 00:00:56,084 --> 00:00:57,418 Uh-oh, look who's callin' here. 24 00:00:57,460 --> 00:00:59,379 Okay. Hey, you see the Daily Beast? 25 00:00:59,420 --> 00:01:03,216 Who is the voice of "Based on a True Story"? 26 00:01:03,257 --> 00:01:05,093 Can you believe that? 27 00:01:05,134 --> 00:01:07,220 Man, we are everywhere. 28 00:01:07,261 --> 00:01:08,554 Right? 29 00:01:08,596 --> 00:01:09,806 How far away are you? 30 00:01:09,847 --> 00:01:12,392 I'm just on Sunset. I'll see you soon. 31 00:01:13,893 --> 00:01:15,853 - Why did she invite him? - I don't know. 32 00:01:15,895 --> 00:01:18,147 It's like, if I know someone, she has to know them too. 33 00:01:18,189 --> 00:01:19,565 My friend has to be her friend. 34 00:01:19,607 --> 00:01:21,401 If I have a plumber, she has to have the same plumber. 35 00:01:21,442 --> 00:01:23,194 - It's like, fuck off. - Yeah. 36 00:01:23,236 --> 00:01:25,488 This is gonna be a fucking great party. 37 00:01:35,081 --> 00:01:36,457 - All right. - Hi, guys. 38 00:01:36,499 --> 00:01:39,043 - Wow. - Welcome. Hi. 39 00:01:39,085 --> 00:01:40,628 - Beautiful in here. - Oh, thank you. 40 00:01:40,670 --> 00:01:42,755 - You look amazing. You're huge. - Thank you. 41 00:01:42,797 --> 00:01:44,257 - Uh... - Hi. 42 00:01:44,298 --> 00:01:46,175 - Hi, girls. - So good to see you. 43 00:01:46,217 --> 00:01:48,761 - You guys look gorgeous. - This dress... 44 00:01:48,803 --> 00:01:50,596 - Cut two dresses... - Stop. 45 00:01:50,638 --> 00:01:52,056 - And put it together. - No, you did not. 46 00:01:52,098 --> 00:01:53,182 - Hi! - Tory! 47 00:01:53,224 --> 00:01:54,350 - Hi, sis. - Hello. 48 00:01:54,392 --> 00:01:55,768 Little kid. 49 00:01:55,810 --> 00:01:56,810 You need a sweater. 50 00:01:56,811 --> 00:01:58,354 - Oh, hi. - No, let it all out. 51 00:01:58,396 --> 00:02:00,940 - How was school? - I just graduated. 52 00:02:00,982 --> 00:02:03,568 - You look smarter. - Looking for a place to stay, 53 00:02:03,609 --> 00:02:05,820 you know, before baby comes and kicks me out. 54 00:02:05,862 --> 00:02:07,405 Oh, my God, no one is kicking you out. 55 00:02:07,447 --> 00:02:08,906 - Is there food yet? - Yeah, inside. 56 00:02:08,948 --> 00:02:10,658 - Bye. - Hi. 57 00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:12,910 - Who's your date? - Tinder guy. 58 00:02:12,952 --> 00:02:15,872 Uh, no, actually, Bumble guy. Jacob. 59 00:02:15,913 --> 00:02:17,123 Another fuckfest. 60 00:02:17,165 --> 00:02:19,000 Oh, no, it's, like, a little early. 61 00:02:19,042 --> 00:02:20,501 - Is it? - Alcohol? 62 00:02:20,543 --> 00:02:21,627 - Mm-hmm, yes. - Yeah. 63 00:02:21,669 --> 00:02:23,046 - Yes, yes. - I see this. 64 00:02:23,047 --> 00:02:24,047 - Bye. - Holding hands. 65 00:02:24,047 --> 00:02:25,256 Intimate. 66 00:02:26,674 --> 00:02:28,217 I used to hate these things. 67 00:02:28,259 --> 00:02:29,635 I always got outbid. 68 00:02:29,677 --> 00:02:31,304 - Not anymore, babe. - Not anymore. 69 00:02:31,345 --> 00:02:32,597 Look at this watch. 70 00:02:32,638 --> 00:02:34,557 Ten-day vacation... Four Seasons in Maui. 71 00:02:34,599 --> 00:02:36,350 Ooh, I like that one. 72 00:02:36,392 --> 00:02:38,685 - What else we got here? - A little wine tasting at home? 73 00:02:38,686 --> 00:02:39,812 That would be nice too. 74 00:02:39,854 --> 00:02:41,314 A brick. 75 00:02:41,355 --> 00:02:43,691 - What is that? - "A single brick salvaged 76 00:02:43,733 --> 00:02:46,861 from the last Manhattan residence of Edgar Allan Poe"? 77 00:02:46,903 --> 00:02:49,072 A creepy brick owned by a horror writer? 78 00:02:49,113 --> 00:02:51,240 - I have to have that. - Early anniversary present? 79 00:02:51,282 --> 00:02:53,534 - That is so mine. - It's gonna be yours, baby. 80 00:02:53,576 --> 00:02:56,371 - It also works as a weapon. - Hey, it's my two favorite people. 81 00:02:57,413 --> 00:02:58,664 - Hey, Matt. - Hey. 82 00:02:58,706 --> 00:03:01,376 - Hey, Michelle. - Hey. 83 00:03:01,417 --> 00:03:03,378 I didn't know you were coming. 84 00:03:03,419 --> 00:03:04,796 - Well, surprise. - Yay. 85 00:03:04,837 --> 00:03:06,422 - Yeah. - Great. Yeah. 86 00:03:06,464 --> 00:03:09,675 And it's great that you guys... um, how are you? 87 00:03:09,717 --> 00:03:13,012 You know what? We are awesome. 88 00:03:13,054 --> 00:03:16,391 Yeah, and we have Nathan to thank because he set us up. 89 00:03:16,432 --> 00:03:17,809 - Yeah. - Oh, I... no, I didn't. 90 00:03:17,850 --> 00:03:19,477 I... I definitely didn't set you up. 91 00:03:19,519 --> 00:03:21,854 No, no, you did. You did, remember? 92 00:03:21,896 --> 00:03:22,939 I... I said he was hot, 93 00:03:22,980 --> 00:03:25,775 and then you said he was good people. 94 00:03:25,817 --> 00:03:27,193 Buddy, thanks. 95 00:03:27,235 --> 00:03:28,778 - I owe you. - I didn't... 96 00:03:28,820 --> 00:03:30,571 Good people? 97 00:03:31,948 --> 00:03:33,908 Oop, excuse me. 98 00:03:33,950 --> 00:03:35,993 Thank you so much. 99 00:03:36,035 --> 00:03:38,413 Oh, my God, these canapes are amazing. 100 00:03:38,454 --> 00:03:40,164 Ugh, I know. I've had, like, 17 of them. 101 00:03:40,206 --> 00:03:42,417 Uh... 102 00:03:44,627 --> 00:03:47,213 Uh... Carlos is here. 103 00:03:47,255 --> 00:03:49,090 Mm, mm-hmm. 104 00:03:49,132 --> 00:03:51,050 Yeah. 105 00:03:51,092 --> 00:03:52,760 You invited Carlos? 106 00:03:52,802 --> 00:03:54,846 Yes. I want all my friends here. 107 00:03:54,887 --> 00:03:56,347 Oh, my God. You invite him to, like, 108 00:03:56,389 --> 00:03:58,433 socialize too? 109 00:03:58,474 --> 00:04:00,059 Well, this is the first one, 110 00:04:00,101 --> 00:04:01,436 but Simon doesn't care. 111 00:04:01,477 --> 00:04:02,812 - Hey. - See? 112 00:04:02,854 --> 00:04:03,854 All good. 113 00:04:03,855 --> 00:04:05,565 You guys are so fucking weird. 114 00:04:07,984 --> 00:04:09,444 Hey, guys. 115 00:04:11,237 --> 00:04:12,447 Bring it in. 116 00:04:12,488 --> 00:04:14,282 Look at these new numbers. 117 00:04:14,323 --> 00:04:16,617 15 million downloads. 118 00:04:16,659 --> 00:04:18,161 That's a lot of fuckin' money. 119 00:04:18,202 --> 00:04:19,579 Yeah, that's a lot of money. 120 00:04:19,580 --> 00:04:20,581 - Like, a million dollars. - Can you believe that? 121 00:04:20,581 --> 00:04:21,789 Can you believe that? 122 00:04:21,831 --> 00:04:24,125 Yeah, but you know what the next question is? 123 00:04:24,167 --> 00:04:25,543 How do we make it bigger? 124 00:04:25,585 --> 00:04:27,295 Okay, let's just enjoy this moment. 125 00:04:27,336 --> 00:04:28,629 We gotta push it. Look. 126 00:04:28,671 --> 00:04:30,423 I went on a bit of a deep dive on Reddit. 127 00:04:30,465 --> 00:04:32,925 Okay, 24% of our fans, 128 00:04:32,967 --> 00:04:35,136 they want me to keep talking about my greatest hits 129 00:04:35,178 --> 00:04:37,638 over and over like I'm Billy fucking Joel, 130 00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:40,558 but 76%, guess what they want? 131 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:42,477 - Don't say it. - Fresh new content, 132 00:04:42,518 --> 00:04:43,518 - motherfuckers. - No. 133 00:04:43,519 --> 00:04:44,812 - No. - Yeah. Yeah. 134 00:04:44,854 --> 00:04:45,855 We're not talking about that anymore. 135 00:04:45,897 --> 00:04:48,450 - They said it. - Faking it worked pretty good in Vegas. 136 00:04:48,451 --> 00:04:50,693 The fake was great. It was great. It was a one-time thing. 137 00:04:50,694 --> 00:04:51,694 - How 'bout a two-time thing? - It was great. 138 00:04:51,695 --> 00:04:52,825 - No, we've gotta listen - Why? 139 00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:54,781 to our 15-million fanbase, 140 00:04:54,822 --> 00:04:56,324 and we gotta keep it real for them. 141 00:04:56,366 --> 00:04:57,700 Okay, listen to this. 142 00:04:57,742 --> 00:05:00,119 Spotify is talking about a $20-million deal with us. 143 00:05:00,161 --> 00:05:01,579 - Yeah. - So how 'bout that's keeping 144 00:05:01,621 --> 00:05:03,956 - shit real, bro? - That's keeping it real real, 145 00:05:03,998 --> 00:05:05,666 so just keep your shit together, 146 00:05:05,708 --> 00:05:08,086 don't fuck it up, and just keep cool. 147 00:05:08,127 --> 00:05:09,420 Offer's comin' in any minute. 148 00:05:09,462 --> 00:05:10,546 We're all gonna be rich. 149 00:05:10,588 --> 00:05:12,173 Okay. Great. 150 00:05:12,215 --> 00:05:13,758 - Got it? - I got it, yeah. 151 00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:16,052 - Don't fuck this up. - Okay, don't fuck it up. 152 00:05:49,460 --> 00:05:51,587 Yeah? 153 00:06:03,015 --> 00:06:05,017 Okay, ready? Oh, good catch. 154 00:06:05,059 --> 00:06:06,728 Good boy. Come here. Come here. 155 00:06:08,146 --> 00:06:09,897 Come here, boy, you handsome boy. 156 00:06:12,734 --> 00:06:14,610 Ooh. Oh, good catch. 157 00:06:14,652 --> 00:06:16,362 Oh, Duke is such a handsome boy. 158 00:06:16,404 --> 00:06:18,114 - Come here. - Hey. 159 00:06:18,156 --> 00:06:20,116 Do you wanna try this edible flower? 160 00:06:20,158 --> 00:06:22,910 Do you think we could get the dog back? 161 00:06:22,952 --> 00:06:24,746 Uh, sorry, what? 162 00:06:24,787 --> 00:06:26,122 - Are you kidding? - I just... I... 163 00:06:26,164 --> 00:06:28,124 I'm really feeling like 164 00:06:28,166 --> 00:06:29,542 he wants to come home. 165 00:06:29,584 --> 00:06:32,045 Okay, babe. We gave them the dog. 166 00:06:32,086 --> 00:06:34,088 You can't ask for something like that back. 167 00:06:34,130 --> 00:06:35,631 - That's insane. - We gave him the dog 168 00:06:35,673 --> 00:06:37,300 because our yard was too small. 169 00:06:37,341 --> 00:06:39,342 - Yes. - But that's about to fucking change. 170 00:06:39,343 --> 00:06:40,678 We're gonna have a huge yard. 171 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:42,138 He should come home. 172 00:06:42,180 --> 00:06:43,514 I mean, look... look at the way he's... 173 00:06:43,556 --> 00:06:45,391 he throws the ball like such a pussy. 174 00:06:45,433 --> 00:06:46,851 He's like... - Anybody see that? 175 00:06:46,893 --> 00:06:48,728 It is kind of a lame throw. 176 00:06:48,770 --> 00:06:50,480 - Right? Just like... - Yeah, but that doesn't mean 177 00:06:50,521 --> 00:06:51,647 you can steal the dog back. 178 00:06:51,689 --> 00:06:53,691 Good catch, Duke! 179 00:06:53,733 --> 00:06:54,817 His name is McEnroe. 180 00:06:54,859 --> 00:06:56,652 It's not Duke, and he knows it. 181 00:06:56,694 --> 00:06:58,237 You gotta let it go, okay? 182 00:06:58,279 --> 00:06:59,489 We can't ask for the dog back. 183 00:06:59,530 --> 00:07:02,325 Okay, fine. We'll buy him back. 184 00:07:02,367 --> 00:07:04,702 You know how much Simon loves this dog? 185 00:07:04,744 --> 00:07:06,579 He does. He's obsessed. 186 00:07:06,621 --> 00:07:08,498 He sleeps in the guesthouse with him. 187 00:07:08,539 --> 00:07:10,041 Do you think I give a shit? 188 00:07:11,626 --> 00:07:13,127 Hey, pal. 189 00:07:14,712 --> 00:07:16,130 It's us. He's look... he's looking at... 190 00:07:16,172 --> 00:07:17,507 - Babe, he's not looking at us. - He's looking at us. 191 00:07:17,548 --> 00:07:19,300 No, he's not. You can't take something 192 00:07:19,342 --> 00:07:20,342 - like that away. - Hey. 193 00:07:20,343 --> 00:07:21,344 That's... that's nuts. 194 00:07:21,386 --> 00:07:22,470 Yeah, um, can I... 195 00:07:22,512 --> 00:07:23,638 can I grab you for a second? I just... 196 00:07:23,679 --> 00:07:24,847 - Yeah. - I need a hand. 197 00:07:24,889 --> 00:07:27,725 Yes. Please don't steal the dog, okay? 198 00:07:27,767 --> 00:07:29,435 Come here, Duke. Come to me. Come to me. 199 00:07:29,477 --> 00:07:30,978 Oh, come here. Good catch. 200 00:07:31,020 --> 00:07:33,481 Good boy. Come here. Come here. 201 00:07:33,523 --> 00:07:35,066 Okay, Duke. 202 00:07:35,108 --> 00:07:36,401 Go get it. 203 00:07:36,442 --> 00:07:38,486 Oh, good catch. You're such a handsome boy. 204 00:07:38,528 --> 00:07:39,737 Bring it back. Bring it back. 205 00:07:50,373 --> 00:07:53,918 Just love this room! 206 00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:55,878 It's so beautiful. Where are the party favors? 207 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:57,463 - You hiding them up here? - Ava... 208 00:07:57,505 --> 00:07:58,881 Also, you have no pictures. 209 00:07:58,923 --> 00:08:01,384 - It's really weird. - Hey, are you okay? 210 00:08:01,426 --> 00:08:03,553 What? 211 00:08:06,806 --> 00:08:08,141 What... what is that? 212 00:08:08,182 --> 00:08:10,017 I don't know. You tell me. 213 00:08:10,059 --> 00:08:12,061 I saw it fall out of your pocket at CrimeCon. 214 00:08:12,103 --> 00:08:15,314 I've... I've never seen that before in my life. 215 00:08:15,356 --> 00:08:16,733 You've never seen this before in your life? 216 00:08:16,774 --> 00:08:17,859 - No. - Ever? 217 00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:19,402 - No. - Okay. 218 00:08:19,444 --> 00:08:22,780 "WTF? You killed Dahlia? 219 00:08:22,822 --> 00:08:24,282 You made a podcast without us? 220 00:08:24,323 --> 00:08:27,160 Meet us outside in the corridor now." 221 00:08:28,870 --> 00:08:31,205 You're "Based on a True Story," aren't you? 222 00:08:31,247 --> 00:08:32,290 The... 223 00:08:32,331 --> 00:08:35,043 "Based on a"... the... the... the podcast? 224 00:08:35,084 --> 00:08:36,753 Ava, I-I just... I wanna help you. 225 00:08:36,794 --> 00:08:37,879 - Are you in danger? - No. 226 00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:39,672 Because I... I called the number 227 00:08:39,714 --> 00:08:40,798 on this phone, and Matt answered. 228 00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:43,051 I don't... no. What? 229 00:08:43,092 --> 00:08:45,428 He's the Westside fucking Ripper, isn't he? 230 00:08:45,470 --> 00:08:46,929 What is going on? 231 00:08:46,971 --> 00:08:48,389 - Okay... - Why... why are you doing this? 232 00:08:48,431 --> 00:08:49,849 - Is... is he threatening you... - It's not what you think. 233 00:08:49,849 --> 00:08:51,100 - Or Nathan? - Oh, my God, no. 234 00:08:51,142 --> 00:08:53,352 It's not... it's not like that at all. 235 00:08:53,394 --> 00:08:55,271 No? Then what is it? Because it says right here 236 00:08:55,313 --> 00:08:56,939 that he killed that girl in Vegas. 237 00:08:56,981 --> 00:08:58,775 Okay, is that why you invited Matt tonight? 238 00:08:58,816 --> 00:09:00,068 So you could ask me about this? 239 00:09:00,109 --> 00:09:01,778 I mean, I invited him to find out 240 00:09:01,819 --> 00:09:03,446 if he's the guy so I... so I could help you, 241 00:09:03,488 --> 00:09:05,198 but if you don't want my help, I'll just go to the cops with... 242 00:09:05,239 --> 00:09:06,657 No, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. 243 00:09:06,699 --> 00:09:08,826 There's no... we don't need to... let's just all calm down. 244 00:09:08,868 --> 00:09:10,286 No cops. You don't need to call anybody. 245 00:09:10,328 --> 00:09:12,455 Oh, fuck. Okay. I'm gonna tell you the truth. 246 00:09:12,497 --> 00:09:14,082 - Okay? - Okay. 247 00:09:15,291 --> 00:09:16,751 Nathan and I are broke. 248 00:09:16,793 --> 00:09:18,878 We... we were gonna lose the house. 249 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:20,338 - What? - I know, and Matt was over, 250 00:09:20,380 --> 00:09:21,964 and we started talking, and it turns out 251 00:09:22,006 --> 00:09:25,134 he's a... he's this, like, crime fanatic junkie like us. 252 00:09:25,176 --> 00:09:29,514 So the three of us decided to make a fake podcast 253 00:09:29,555 --> 00:09:33,351 where Matt pretends to be the Westside Ripper. 254 00:09:36,437 --> 00:09:40,149 So Matt is pretending to be a serial killer? 255 00:09:40,191 --> 00:09:41,526 I know. When you say it like that, 256 00:09:41,567 --> 00:09:42,652 it sounds really bad, but... 257 00:09:42,693 --> 00:09:45,279 it-it's so bad and... and fucked up. 258 00:09:45,321 --> 00:09:47,281 I know it sounds like that, but we were desperate, 259 00:09:47,323 --> 00:09:49,283 desperate, completely desperate, and... 260 00:09:49,325 --> 00:09:51,494 and then Matt, like, he got, like, really into it, 261 00:09:51,536 --> 00:09:53,246 and he pretended he was the guy 262 00:09:53,287 --> 00:09:54,789 that pushed that girl off the roof. 263 00:09:54,831 --> 00:09:56,165 And people got obsessed. 264 00:09:56,207 --> 00:09:58,459 They couldn't get enough of it. 265 00:09:58,501 --> 00:10:01,629 So you're saying that all of this is... is fake 266 00:10:01,671 --> 00:10:02,839 and that guy's just a plumber? 267 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:06,551 - Yes! - Because this looks pretty fucking real to me. 268 00:10:06,592 --> 00:10:07,760 Well, good. 269 00:10:07,802 --> 00:10:10,304 We... We got you. 270 00:10:10,346 --> 00:10:11,389 That's good. 271 00:10:11,431 --> 00:10:12,598 That... 272 00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:14,350 Come on. 273 00:10:14,392 --> 00:10:19,021 Do you think that I would be in business with a real serial killer? 274 00:10:19,063 --> 00:10:22,024 I mean, you sound insane. 275 00:10:22,066 --> 00:10:24,694 That would be the biggest fucking stupidest thing 276 00:10:24,736 --> 00:10:26,362 I could do, right? 277 00:10:26,404 --> 00:10:28,114 Right? 278 00:10:29,741 --> 00:10:30,867 - Yeah. - Right. 279 00:10:30,908 --> 00:10:32,201 Please don't tell anybody. 280 00:10:32,243 --> 00:10:36,914 Truly, like, I... I literally dragged Nathan into this shit show. 281 00:10:36,956 --> 00:10:38,416 There's a baby coming. 282 00:10:38,458 --> 00:10:41,169 Our lives could be over. 283 00:10:41,210 --> 00:10:42,420 Please. 284 00:10:44,422 --> 00:10:45,798 Okay. 285 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:47,800 Okay. Yeah, no, no, no. I... I... 286 00:10:47,842 --> 00:10:48,885 I won't say a word. 287 00:10:48,926 --> 00:10:50,720 Thank you. 288 00:10:50,762 --> 00:10:53,139 - Thank you. - Wow. 289 00:10:53,181 --> 00:10:56,225 I got to admit, this is... this is kind of genius. 290 00:10:56,267 --> 00:10:58,770 "Based on a True Story" is based on a fake story. 291 00:10:58,811 --> 00:11:00,855 - I know. - I-I wish I'd thought of it. 292 00:11:00,897 --> 00:11:03,441 Yeah. Well, yeah. Well, yeah. Mm-hmm. 293 00:11:03,483 --> 00:11:04,776 Thank you. 294 00:11:05,943 --> 00:11:07,362 I got your back. 295 00:11:07,403 --> 00:11:10,573 - Thank you. Okay. Okay. - Let's go back outside. 296 00:11:10,615 --> 00:11:13,618 Duke, Duke. Duke. 297 00:11:13,659 --> 00:11:14,659 - Duke. - McEnroe. See? 298 00:11:14,660 --> 00:11:16,037 He likes McEnroe. McEnroe. 299 00:11:16,079 --> 00:11:17,580 McEnroe, right there. 300 00:11:18,748 --> 00:11:20,083 Good boy. 301 00:11:20,124 --> 00:11:21,793 Yes! Come on, buddy. 302 00:11:21,834 --> 00:11:23,503 - Come here. Come here. - Come on, buddy. 303 00:11:27,382 --> 00:11:29,258 Come to me, Duke. Come to me, Duke. 304 00:11:31,219 --> 00:11:32,261 Good boy. 305 00:11:33,679 --> 00:11:34,972 - Ready? Go. - Okay. 306 00:11:35,014 --> 00:11:37,141 I... I got it. Okay, here we go. 307 00:11:37,183 --> 00:11:38,518 Go get it. 308 00:11:38,519 --> 00:11:39,519 Here boy. Come on. 309 00:11:42,105 --> 00:11:43,815 - Here, boy. Come on. - Duke. 310 00:11:43,856 --> 00:11:45,149 - Hey, hey. - Come on. 311 00:11:45,191 --> 00:11:46,859 Bring it to me. Bring it to me, to me. 312 00:11:46,901 --> 00:11:49,070 - Me, me. - McEnroe, look at me. 313 00:11:49,112 --> 00:11:51,489 Come here, pal. Come here, pal. 314 00:11:51,531 --> 00:11:52,573 Look at me. Come here. 315 00:11:52,615 --> 00:11:54,200 - Bring it to me. To me. - Duke. Duke! 316 00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:58,121 Come to me, Duke. Come to me. 317 00:11:58,162 --> 00:12:00,748 Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 318 00:12:00,790 --> 00:12:03,084 Yay... oh! 319 00:12:03,126 --> 00:12:05,378 Aah! 320 00:12:10,842 --> 00:12:11,884 Help! Help! 321 00:12:25,356 --> 00:12:27,567 I'm gonna getcha outta here. 322 00:12:50,798 --> 00:12:52,091 - McEnroe. - Duke. 323 00:12:52,133 --> 00:12:53,509 - McEnroe. - Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 324 00:12:53,551 --> 00:12:54,886 - Bring it to me. - Come to me. Come to me, Duke. 325 00:12:54,927 --> 00:12:56,262 - Duke! - Look at me. 326 00:12:56,304 --> 00:12:57,304 - Come to me. Come to me. - McEnroe. 327 00:12:57,305 --> 00:12:58,848 Come to me. Yeah, yeah. 328 00:12:58,890 --> 00:12:59,890 - Oh! Oh, don't... - Good boy. 329 00:13:04,353 --> 00:13:05,980 Hey. 330 00:13:06,022 --> 00:13:07,815 Hi. Hi. 331 00:13:07,857 --> 00:13:10,026 You good? 332 00:13:10,068 --> 00:13:12,695 Um, yes. 333 00:13:12,737 --> 00:13:14,447 Yes, I'm good. 334 00:13:14,489 --> 00:13:17,200 Everybody, please take a seat inside. 335 00:13:17,241 --> 00:13:20,161 Dinner first, and then the auction. 336 00:13:22,246 --> 00:13:24,082 Yeah, he likes me so much better than Simon. 337 00:13:24,123 --> 00:13:27,168 - I know. - Let's get that fuckin' brick. 338 00:13:27,210 --> 00:13:30,797 Hey, did you call me before? 339 00:13:30,838 --> 00:13:32,715 Uh, it was a butt-dial, sorry. 340 00:13:32,757 --> 00:13:34,342 - Really? - Yep. 341 00:13:34,384 --> 00:13:36,010 Where's the trust, partner? 342 00:13:42,767 --> 00:13:44,352 The same caterer did my... our wedding. 343 00:13:44,394 --> 00:13:46,437 - I didn't know that. - Uh-huh. 344 00:13:46,479 --> 00:13:48,189 - That's right. - Yeah. 345 00:13:48,231 --> 00:13:49,232 Hm? 346 00:13:49,273 --> 00:13:50,274 - Absolutely. - It's great. 347 00:13:50,316 --> 00:13:51,316 - Okay. - I wish he would take 348 00:13:51,317 --> 00:13:52,317 - an interest in my... - I mean... 349 00:13:55,947 --> 00:13:57,949 - You tried your cake? - No. 350 00:13:57,990 --> 00:13:59,075 Goodness. 351 00:13:59,117 --> 00:14:00,118 Thank you. 352 00:14:00,159 --> 00:14:01,619 Nice to see you. 353 00:14:01,661 --> 00:14:04,288 So are you a part of the crew now? 354 00:14:04,330 --> 00:14:05,957 Hey, did you crush those midterms? 355 00:14:05,998 --> 00:14:08,418 Yeah, I'm going to UCLA Law in the fall. 356 00:14:08,459 --> 00:14:10,712 - Oh, my God. Congrats. - Yeah, thanks. 357 00:14:10,753 --> 00:14:12,296 So we're gonna see a lot more of you. 358 00:14:12,338 --> 00:14:14,340 - Yeah, a whole lot more. - Awesome. 359 00:14:14,382 --> 00:14:16,342 "Crushed those midterms"? 360 00:14:16,384 --> 00:14:18,511 So a sign of the times, I tried to put an ad 361 00:14:18,553 --> 00:14:21,848 on that hot true crime podcast, "Based on a True Story." 362 00:14:21,889 --> 00:14:23,057 - Hot. - Brilliant. 363 00:14:23,099 --> 00:14:24,267 Such a hot show. 364 00:14:24,308 --> 00:14:26,269 - Is that not a genius idea? - Right? 365 00:14:26,310 --> 00:14:27,770 - Yeah. - Amazing. 366 00:14:27,812 --> 00:14:29,355 - Brilliant. - Yeah. 367 00:14:29,397 --> 00:14:31,065 - I love that. - Oh, my gosh, it gets me hot. 368 00:14:31,107 --> 00:14:32,358 - So brilliant. - It's so good. 369 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:33,693 - I think it's fake. - Oh, yeah? 370 00:14:33,735 --> 00:14:36,446 Yeah, like, the, um... the Orson Welles thing? 371 00:14:36,487 --> 00:14:37,613 Uh, "War of the Worlds"? 372 00:14:37,655 --> 00:14:39,699 It could be just street theater. 373 00:14:39,741 --> 00:14:41,826 Absolutely not. Are you kidding me? 374 00:14:41,868 --> 00:14:43,161 You heard this guy's voice? 375 00:14:43,202 --> 00:14:44,787 That's a stabby voice. 376 00:14:44,829 --> 00:14:47,206 - What? - I buy it 100%. 377 00:14:47,248 --> 00:14:48,875 - That guy is the killer. - Mm. 378 00:14:48,916 --> 00:14:51,335 - You should just ask them. - There's no chance. 379 00:14:51,377 --> 00:14:53,880 - Yeah. - You never talk to anybody. 380 00:14:53,921 --> 00:14:55,173 - Oh. - No, you... 381 00:14:55,214 --> 00:14:57,258 you email a shell corporation. 382 00:14:57,300 --> 00:14:58,801 You pay them in crypto. 383 00:14:58,843 --> 00:15:02,472 Nobody knows where they are or who they are. 384 00:15:02,513 --> 00:15:05,016 - Wow. - I wouldn't pay them a cent. 385 00:15:05,058 --> 00:15:07,894 Paul, the guy is killing people. 386 00:15:07,935 --> 00:15:09,687 Okay, Richard. 387 00:15:09,729 --> 00:15:13,524 Last time I checked, there is still free speech in America. 388 00:15:13,566 --> 00:15:15,818 Okay, even if that speech is about 389 00:15:15,860 --> 00:15:17,320 how you just killed someone? 390 00:15:17,362 --> 00:15:18,654 Yeah, especially then. 391 00:15:18,696 --> 00:15:21,157 You... you wanna outlaw offensive speech? 392 00:15:21,199 --> 00:15:22,867 Who decides what goes on the list? 393 00:15:22,909 --> 00:15:24,410 Me? You? 394 00:15:24,452 --> 00:15:28,206 I listen to it, and I think it's totally fucking disgusting. 395 00:15:28,247 --> 00:15:29,916 I think that you're right. 396 00:15:29,957 --> 00:15:31,542 I think that it's all true. 397 00:15:31,584 --> 00:15:33,169 I think he's a serial killer. 398 00:15:33,211 --> 00:15:35,046 And I think the people that are helping him 399 00:15:35,088 --> 00:15:36,672 are far worse than he is. 400 00:15:36,714 --> 00:15:38,591 - Oh. What people? - Preach, sister. 401 00:15:38,633 --> 00:15:39,884 - There's an interviewer. - Hm? 402 00:15:39,926 --> 00:15:41,427 - Don't say that. - Right? I mean, somebody... 403 00:15:41,469 --> 00:15:42,845 - No, that's not your word. - Has to be helping him. 404 00:15:42,887 --> 00:15:46,349 The Westside Ripper has some kind of brain defect, 405 00:15:46,391 --> 00:15:48,851 but these parasites are making money off of him. 406 00:15:48,893 --> 00:15:50,853 They should go to prison longer than he does. 407 00:15:50,895 --> 00:15:53,106 That's a very good point. 408 00:15:53,147 --> 00:15:54,399 No, they really should. 409 00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:56,275 - Think about it. - Mm. 410 00:15:56,317 --> 00:15:58,653 I don't know. I... 411 00:15:58,695 --> 00:16:00,863 there's nothing wrong with makin' money. 412 00:16:00,905 --> 00:16:03,074 I love money. You love money. 413 00:16:03,116 --> 00:16:04,617 You love money. 414 00:16:04,659 --> 00:16:06,077 Money's great. 415 00:16:06,119 --> 00:16:07,412 Puts food on the table, 416 00:16:07,453 --> 00:16:09,414 puts our kids through school. 417 00:16:09,455 --> 00:16:11,541 Carlos loves money. Right? 418 00:16:11,582 --> 00:16:12,834 What? 419 00:16:12,875 --> 00:16:17,338 Can't open your gym on the East Coast without money, right? 420 00:16:17,380 --> 00:16:19,590 Uh, it certainly would help, yeah. 421 00:16:19,632 --> 00:16:22,552 Mm, guys, I think it's time 422 00:16:22,593 --> 00:16:24,762 to start bidding on the items, right? 423 00:16:24,804 --> 00:16:27,014 I just wanna say I love Carlos' business plan. 424 00:16:27,056 --> 00:16:29,350 - Oh, my God. - And I... 425 00:16:29,392 --> 00:16:30,768 I want to invest in it. 426 00:16:30,810 --> 00:16:33,771 Wait, you... you want to invest in my gym? 427 00:16:33,813 --> 00:16:37,942 Yeah, I want to finance the whole thing by myself. 428 00:16:39,277 --> 00:16:40,445 Well, that's... 429 00:16:40,486 --> 00:16:41,696 Wait, are you serious? 430 00:16:41,738 --> 00:16:42,947 100%. 431 00:16:42,989 --> 00:16:43,989 - Great. - Yeah? 432 00:16:43,990 --> 00:16:45,074 When do we start? 433 00:16:46,993 --> 00:16:48,911 Now. 434 00:16:48,953 --> 00:16:50,913 What? 435 00:16:50,955 --> 00:16:52,790 Now. 436 00:16:52,832 --> 00:16:54,083 Like, right now. 437 00:16:54,125 --> 00:16:55,251 Immediately. 438 00:16:56,794 --> 00:16:57,879 Immediately? 439 00:16:57,920 --> 00:16:59,297 He's joking. 440 00:16:59,338 --> 00:17:01,340 He's just... 441 00:17:01,382 --> 00:17:03,593 Go pack a bag, 442 00:17:03,634 --> 00:17:05,053 go to LAX, 443 00:17:05,094 --> 00:17:07,847 get on the red-eye, go to New York, get to work. 444 00:17:07,889 --> 00:17:10,433 It's gonna take a couple of years. 445 00:17:10,475 --> 00:17:12,226 I'm gonna need you there the whole time 446 00:17:12,268 --> 00:17:14,854 overseeing construction, the plans, 447 00:17:14,896 --> 00:17:18,399 and you're not gonna be able to come back here ever. 448 00:17:23,863 --> 00:17:26,324 Why you doing this? 449 00:17:26,366 --> 00:17:28,785 - Hm? - Hm? 450 00:17:28,826 --> 00:17:30,912 Why are you doing this right now? 451 00:17:30,953 --> 00:17:32,205 Is it 'cause I invited him? 452 00:17:32,246 --> 00:17:35,124 What? 453 00:17:35,166 --> 00:17:36,667 I believe in Carlos. 454 00:17:36,709 --> 00:17:38,836 I like Carlos' business plan. 455 00:17:38,878 --> 00:17:41,964 Unless there's something that Carlos loves 456 00:17:42,006 --> 00:17:45,176 more than money here in LA. 457 00:17:45,218 --> 00:17:46,386 Then he should stay. 458 00:17:49,722 --> 00:17:51,682 Okay. 459 00:17:51,724 --> 00:17:55,478 I just transferred you $250,000. 460 00:17:55,479 --> 00:17:56,479 What? 461 00:18:03,569 --> 00:18:06,572 When I get my investment back, we'll go 50/50. 462 00:18:06,614 --> 00:18:09,409 If it works out, I'll finance a national rollout, 463 00:18:09,450 --> 00:18:12,412 but you gotta go right now. 464 00:18:20,420 --> 00:18:21,420 You don't have to go. 465 00:18:21,421 --> 00:18:24,257 Babe, please, stay for me. 466 00:18:24,298 --> 00:18:25,758 You gotta go, Carlos. 467 00:18:28,136 --> 00:18:29,303 I'm sorry. 468 00:18:30,221 --> 00:18:32,181 Oh. 469 00:18:44,569 --> 00:18:47,071 Are you fucking insane? 470 00:18:51,325 --> 00:18:53,453 Why would you do that? 471 00:18:53,494 --> 00:18:55,913 Why the fuck do you even care? 472 00:18:59,292 --> 00:19:01,002 God. 473 00:19:02,295 --> 00:19:03,463 Hey, buddy. 474 00:19:03,504 --> 00:19:05,006 You got some interesting friends. 475 00:19:05,048 --> 00:19:08,426 Okay, let's help some teen runaways! 476 00:19:10,136 --> 00:19:12,305 Oh, my God. 477 00:19:12,346 --> 00:19:14,182 I cannot believe that happened. 478 00:19:15,725 --> 00:19:16,725 You okay? 479 00:19:16,726 --> 00:19:18,227 I know you really loved Carlos. 480 00:19:18,269 --> 00:19:19,771 Oh, fuck Carlos. 481 00:19:19,812 --> 00:19:21,522 I never loved Carlos, 482 00:19:21,564 --> 00:19:24,692 but fuck him for leaving. 483 00:19:24,734 --> 00:19:28,279 Well, I mean, we all know you're gonna be just fine. 484 00:19:28,321 --> 00:19:30,198 - Will I? - Yes. 485 00:19:30,239 --> 00:19:33,117 'Cause I feel like I'm pretty fucked right now. 486 00:19:33,159 --> 00:19:37,163 Ava, look at my life right now. 487 00:19:37,205 --> 00:19:38,748 Take a good look. 488 00:19:38,790 --> 00:19:41,125 You gotta let me in on the podcast. 489 00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:43,836 Okay? It's... it's literally all that I got. 490 00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:48,132 Okay, uh, maybe we should talk about this another time. 491 00:19:48,174 --> 00:19:50,176 No, no, no, 'cause... 'cause I can help you. 492 00:19:50,218 --> 00:19:52,387 You know, you... you know I'm great with marketing. 493 00:19:52,428 --> 00:19:54,972 Right? And branding, and I know this world. 494 00:19:55,014 --> 00:19:57,392 And we're the "Wine & Crime" girls, right? 495 00:19:57,433 --> 00:19:58,935 - Yeah, I can't do this. - Oh, well, I... 496 00:19:58,976 --> 00:20:00,853 because do you remember that guy... 497 00:20:00,895 --> 00:20:02,772 that guy that I had a thing with in Cabo last year? 498 00:20:02,814 --> 00:20:05,233 'Cause he's huge at Wondery, 499 00:20:05,274 --> 00:20:06,359 and... and he's married, 500 00:20:06,401 --> 00:20:07,777 so he definitely owes me a solid. 501 00:20:07,819 --> 00:20:09,946 I can get him to make us a preemptive offer, 502 00:20:09,987 --> 00:20:12,657 you know, probably a really, really big one. 503 00:20:12,699 --> 00:20:14,283 - Oh, my God. - Yes. 504 00:20:14,325 --> 00:20:18,663 So some guy is gonna make us a multimillion-dollar offer 505 00:20:18,705 --> 00:20:20,498 because he went down on you in Cabo? 506 00:20:20,540 --> 00:20:23,376 Yeah, that is how the world works. 507 00:20:23,418 --> 00:20:25,253 How do you not know that? 508 00:20:25,294 --> 00:20:27,046 Okay, just trust me. 509 00:20:27,088 --> 00:20:29,132 You shouldn't get involved in this 'cause it's a mess. 510 00:20:29,173 --> 00:20:30,508 Okay, hold on. 511 00:20:30,550 --> 00:20:31,676 Don't come at me like you're my friend now. 512 00:20:31,718 --> 00:20:34,804 - What? - No, I know exactly what's going on. 513 00:20:34,846 --> 00:20:37,557 I mean, I know Matt's the killer. 514 00:20:37,598 --> 00:20:39,892 I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. 515 00:20:39,934 --> 00:20:41,352 Okay. 516 00:20:41,394 --> 00:20:42,937 So if I took Matt's wine glass 517 00:20:42,979 --> 00:20:44,689 and took it down to the police station, 518 00:20:44,731 --> 00:20:48,025 you're telling me that his DNA wouldn't be an exact match 519 00:20:48,067 --> 00:20:49,527 to the Westside Ripper? 520 00:20:52,739 --> 00:20:54,741 If you tell a single person about this, 521 00:20:54,782 --> 00:20:57,493 I will fucking end you. 522 00:20:57,535 --> 00:20:59,120 But I already told Simon. 523 00:21:00,538 --> 00:21:02,415 - What? - Yeah. 524 00:21:02,457 --> 00:21:04,417 - I told him. - You told... 525 00:21:04,459 --> 00:21:06,044 you told Simon? Are you insane? 526 00:21:06,085 --> 00:21:08,379 - Why would you do that? - Because he's a lawyer, 527 00:21:08,421 --> 00:21:09,797 and he will protect me! 528 00:21:09,839 --> 00:21:12,050 Oh, my God. He's not gonna protect you. 529 00:21:12,091 --> 00:21:14,510 He fucking hates you. He hates everything about you! 530 00:21:14,552 --> 00:21:16,721 Oh, sweetie. 531 00:21:16,763 --> 00:21:18,139 That's just married talk. 532 00:21:18,181 --> 00:21:19,682 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I can't believe 533 00:21:19,724 --> 00:21:22,810 you would be stupid enough to fucking tell Simon! 534 00:21:22,852 --> 00:21:25,188 Oh, I absolutely am that stupid. 535 00:21:25,229 --> 00:21:26,731 And why not? 536 00:21:26,773 --> 00:21:29,942 I mean, it's worked pretty well for me so far, right? 537 00:21:29,984 --> 00:21:31,444 Tell me something. 538 00:21:31,486 --> 00:21:36,908 Who's the one living in a mansion in the Palisades, 539 00:21:36,949 --> 00:21:39,452 and who can't afford their mortgage in Mar Vista? 540 00:21:40,578 --> 00:21:42,121 Okay, you listen to me, 541 00:21:42,163 --> 00:21:44,665 you with your little 400 calories a day, 542 00:21:44,707 --> 00:21:46,876 your cool sculpt, and your amazing blowjobs 543 00:21:46,918 --> 00:21:48,002 you can't stop bragging about... 544 00:21:48,044 --> 00:21:50,088 - They are amazing. - Well, 545 00:21:50,129 --> 00:21:52,757 not amazing enough to keep Carlos around. 546 00:21:52,799 --> 00:21:54,592 So if you wanna go steal 547 00:21:54,634 --> 00:21:56,427 the Westside Ripper's wine glass, 548 00:21:56,469 --> 00:21:57,887 good fucking luck. 549 00:21:57,929 --> 00:21:59,013 Fuck you. 550 00:21:59,055 --> 00:22:00,765 Fuck you, 'cause Nathan will bring me in 551 00:22:00,807 --> 00:22:03,601 'cause he is nothing like you! 552 00:22:03,643 --> 00:22:05,603 He will cut me in! 553 00:22:05,645 --> 00:22:08,147 And my blowjobs are the fucking best! 554 00:22:09,399 --> 00:22:12,443 Everyone in LA knows it... 555 00:22:12,485 --> 00:22:13,778 and Dubai. 556 00:22:17,399 --> 00:22:19,492 900, $900. Ladies and gentlemen, 557 00:22:19,534 --> 00:22:22,704 it would be a dream within a dream if we got to $1,000. 558 00:22:22,745 --> 00:22:25,498 Do I hear 1, $1,000 559 00:22:25,540 --> 00:22:26,749 for the Edgar Allan Poe brick. 560 00:22:26,791 --> 00:22:28,000 How 'bout a 1,200? Who'll do a 1,200? 561 00:22:28,042 --> 00:22:29,460 There's a fan of blood and murder for 1,200. 562 00:22:29,502 --> 00:22:31,295 Hey, can I talk to you for a second? 563 00:22:31,337 --> 00:22:33,214 Hold on, these fuckers are trying to steal your brick. 564 00:22:33,256 --> 00:22:34,674 - $1,300. - Okay, but... 565 00:22:34,716 --> 00:22:37,385 I need you for one second. 566 00:22:37,427 --> 00:22:39,053 - We're gonna lose the brick. - I don't care. 567 00:22:39,095 --> 00:22:40,763 Just come on. 568 00:22:40,805 --> 00:22:42,098 So here's the thing... don't panic 569 00:22:42,140 --> 00:22:43,808 when I tell you this... but I lost the burner. 570 00:22:43,850 --> 00:22:44,850 - What? - I got it back, 571 00:22:44,851 --> 00:22:45,852 but I dropped it in Vegas, 572 00:22:45,893 --> 00:22:47,270 and then Ruby, she found it, 573 00:22:47,311 --> 00:22:48,406 and now she's blackmailing us... 574 00:22:48,407 --> 00:22:49,408 - Oh, my fucking God. - and wants in on everything. 575 00:22:49,408 --> 00:22:50,523 - Ruby? - Yes. 576 00:22:50,524 --> 00:22:51,524 How did you not know you dropped it? 577 00:22:51,525 --> 00:22:53,526 It was an accident! Okay? We had been using yours. 578 00:22:53,568 --> 00:22:54,652 I barely use mine. I thought it was 579 00:22:54,694 --> 00:22:55,903 in my bag, but it fell out. 580 00:22:55,945 --> 00:22:57,363 I know I fucked up, but she knows everything. 581 00:22:57,405 --> 00:22:59,198 She knows that Matt is the Westside Ripper, 582 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:01,159 and she told me that she told Simon. 583 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,911 - She told Simon? - Well, she might be bluffing. 584 00:23:03,953 --> 00:23:05,663 - I don't fuckin' know, but... - This is fine. It's fine. 585 00:23:05,705 --> 00:23:06,873 We're gonna figure this out. 586 00:23:06,914 --> 00:23:08,166 But this place is toxic. 587 00:23:08,207 --> 00:23:09,792 Okay? I'm telling you, it's fucking toxic. 588 00:23:09,834 --> 00:23:12,045 They're nuts. I'm taking McEnroe outta here. 589 00:23:12,086 --> 00:23:13,963 Babe, who fucking cares about the dog right now? 590 00:23:14,005 --> 00:23:15,506 Just forget the fuckin' dog. 591 00:23:15,548 --> 00:23:17,091 We have bigger problems. 592 00:23:18,593 --> 00:23:20,053 - What? What? - Oh, shit. 593 00:23:20,094 --> 00:23:23,097 Alba, she just came out against us. 594 00:23:23,139 --> 00:23:24,307 No, not Alba. 595 00:23:24,348 --> 00:23:25,558 Jessica Alba just tweeted, 596 00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:27,935 "If #BasedOnATrueStory is true, it's sickening. 597 00:23:27,977 --> 00:23:29,437 If it's fake, it might be even worse. 598 00:23:29,479 --> 00:23:30,730 America, we're better than this. 599 00:23:30,772 --> 00:23:33,483 #CancelBasedOnATrueStory." 600 00:23:33,524 --> 00:23:35,068 Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no. 601 00:23:35,109 --> 00:23:36,986 Okay, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh, my God. 602 00:23:37,028 --> 00:23:38,028 Okay, maybe it's not gonna track. 603 00:23:38,029 --> 00:23:39,655 Maybe no one's gonna pick this up. 604 00:23:39,697 --> 00:23:42,075 Oh, shit. Malia Obama just retweeted it. 605 00:23:43,117 --> 00:23:45,078 Oh, my God, so did Tom Hanks. 606 00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,288 - Kylie Jenner. - Oh, my God. 607 00:23:47,330 --> 00:23:49,165 So did Dame Judi Dench. 608 00:23:49,207 --> 00:23:51,084 - Oh, I'm so sorry, babe. - Oh, my God. 609 00:23:51,125 --> 00:23:53,586 - I know you love her. - Are you seeing this shit? 610 00:23:53,628 --> 00:23:54,796 - Yes. - We're gonna get canceled? 611 00:23:54,837 --> 00:23:57,924 - Alba fucked us. - Okay, is there anyone that's for us? 612 00:23:57,965 --> 00:23:59,509 - For us? Um... - Who is? Look. 613 00:23:59,550 --> 00:24:00,760 - Kanye? - Okay, Kanye? 614 00:24:00,802 --> 00:24:02,220 Ugh, that's not good. 615 00:24:02,261 --> 00:24:03,262 The dude from NXIVM. 616 00:24:03,304 --> 00:24:04,555 Josh Duggar? 617 00:24:04,597 --> 00:24:05,890 Jared from Subway. 618 00:24:05,932 --> 00:24:07,141 - That's not good. - That's bad. 619 00:24:07,183 --> 00:24:08,226 No. 620 00:24:08,267 --> 00:24:09,936 This is fuckin' awful. 621 00:24:09,977 --> 00:24:11,104 There goes iTunes. 622 00:24:11,145 --> 00:24:12,438 - We lost iTunes? - Yes. 623 00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:13,564 Okay. 624 00:24:13,606 --> 00:24:14,816 Okay, here's what we're gonna do. 625 00:24:14,857 --> 00:24:16,359 You and me, we're gettin' outta here. 626 00:24:16,401 --> 00:24:17,944 We're takin' the dog. We'll call you from the road. 627 00:24:17,985 --> 00:24:19,404 You're taking the fucking dog? 628 00:24:19,445 --> 00:24:20,446 Our brand is under attack. 629 00:24:20,488 --> 00:24:21,739 We gotta act now. 630 00:24:21,781 --> 00:24:23,616 Here's our play, okay? 631 00:24:23,658 --> 00:24:25,159 The snowflakes can suck it. 632 00:24:25,201 --> 00:24:27,704 We're gonna double down just like our fans want. 633 00:24:27,745 --> 00:24:29,038 - I'm gonna go out tonight... - No. 634 00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:31,916 - And I will... - We are not doing that, okay? 635 00:24:31,958 --> 00:24:33,793 We have to do something, but we are not doing that. 636 00:24:33,835 --> 00:24:34,835 You guys, if we don't do something, 637 00:24:34,836 --> 00:24:37,130 we are gonna lose the Spotify deal. 638 00:24:37,171 --> 00:24:38,840 Do you understand? So what do we do? 639 00:24:38,881 --> 00:24:40,466 Wait, wait. Hold on a second. 640 00:24:40,508 --> 00:24:41,676 Wait a minute. Doesn't... 641 00:24:41,718 --> 00:24:44,846 doesn't Ruby know Alba? 642 00:24:44,887 --> 00:24:48,391 Yes. You know what? She was her body double in "Spy Kids 4." 643 00:24:48,433 --> 00:24:49,600 Remember, she had the wig and the costume on 644 00:24:49,642 --> 00:24:50,810 one night after shooting? 645 00:24:50,852 --> 00:24:52,437 She loves to hold that over me. 646 00:24:52,478 --> 00:24:53,646 She went down on Kid Rock. 647 00:24:53,688 --> 00:24:54,897 - Someone took a photo. - Yeah. 648 00:24:54,939 --> 00:24:56,733 Why don't we get Ruby to tell Alba 649 00:24:56,774 --> 00:24:58,484 that we'll release the fuckin' photo 650 00:24:58,526 --> 00:24:59,819 unless she pulls the post? 651 00:24:59,861 --> 00:25:00,987 Why would Alba care? 652 00:25:01,029 --> 00:25:02,155 It's not her in the picture. 653 00:25:02,196 --> 00:25:03,948 It doesn't matter. It looks like her. 654 00:25:03,990 --> 00:25:05,825 No, the tweet's out there. It's taken flight. 655 00:25:05,867 --> 00:25:07,035 You go talk to Ruby. 656 00:25:07,076 --> 00:25:08,327 I'll find out what Simon knows. 657 00:25:08,369 --> 00:25:10,621 Ruby's not gonna do shit for us right now. 658 00:25:10,663 --> 00:25:12,665 - Trust me. - It's all we fuckin' got, 659 00:25:12,707 --> 00:25:14,208 guys. Let's go. Go. 660 00:25:14,250 --> 00:25:16,502 Big man, everyone! 661 00:25:17,545 --> 00:25:19,338 Big fuckin' man. 662 00:25:19,380 --> 00:25:22,425 What kind of control freak buys his wife's boyfriend, huh? 663 00:25:22,467 --> 00:25:23,968 You're the one who invited him, honey, 664 00:25:24,010 --> 00:25:25,136 in front of all of our friends. 665 00:25:25,178 --> 00:25:26,721 Yeah, you know why? You know why? 666 00:25:26,763 --> 00:25:29,057 'Cause you can't get it up unless you call me "Mommy." 667 00:25:29,098 --> 00:25:31,017 Do you guys know that? What's up with that? 668 00:25:31,059 --> 00:25:33,352 You miss sucking on Mommy's titties, huh? 669 00:25:33,394 --> 00:25:35,855 Yes! Yes, I do! 670 00:25:35,897 --> 00:25:37,315 You know what? I actually like 671 00:25:37,356 --> 00:25:39,650 sucking Mom's tits better than yours! 672 00:25:39,692 --> 00:25:41,235 Guys, that's not great 673 00:25:41,277 --> 00:25:42,653 - for the dog. - Or anyone. 674 00:25:42,695 --> 00:25:45,990 Even if I stitched Michael Fassbender's foreskin 675 00:25:46,032 --> 00:25:47,909 onto Orlando Bloom's dick... 676 00:25:47,950 --> 00:25:50,036 And Frankensteined the perfect penis, 677 00:25:50,078 --> 00:25:51,954 I still couldn't get it up for you! 678 00:25:51,996 --> 00:25:53,331 Are you gonna finally stroke out 679 00:25:53,373 --> 00:25:56,042 and leave me with all your daddy's money, huh? 680 00:25:56,084 --> 00:25:59,796 Come on. Come on, McEnroe. Come on. 681 00:25:59,837 --> 00:26:03,007 Okay, stay here, and stay quiet. 682 00:26:03,049 --> 00:26:04,425 I'm gonna get you outta here tonight. 683 00:26:04,467 --> 00:26:05,510 Okay? Yeah. 684 00:26:05,551 --> 00:26:07,053 You think that hurt me? 685 00:26:07,095 --> 00:26:08,888 You think sending him away hurt me? 686 00:26:08,930 --> 00:26:10,223 - Okay! - You can't fucking hurt me. 687 00:26:10,264 --> 00:26:11,808 What do you want? You want the spa day 688 00:26:11,849 --> 00:26:13,142 at the Peninsula, honey, huh? 689 00:26:13,184 --> 00:26:14,352 Do you want the deep tissue? 690 00:26:14,394 --> 00:26:16,062 Do you want me to buy that for you? 691 00:26:16,104 --> 00:26:17,772 You're gonna continue to buy my love! 692 00:26:17,814 --> 00:26:19,273 You're a fucking monster, 693 00:26:19,315 --> 00:26:21,275 and you've never loved anything 694 00:26:21,317 --> 00:26:24,028 in your entire life except that dog! 695 00:26:24,070 --> 00:26:26,406 That's it! How pathetic is that, everyone? 696 00:26:26,447 --> 00:26:28,908 - So now it's the dog's fault? - Oh, sure! 697 00:26:28,950 --> 00:26:30,201 Yeah, it's the dog's fault! 698 00:26:30,243 --> 00:26:32,036 Sure, it's the fucking dog's fault! 699 00:26:32,078 --> 00:26:33,371 You want me to shut the dog up? 700 00:26:33,413 --> 00:26:35,206 Yeah, go shut the fucking dog up! 701 00:26:35,248 --> 00:26:37,083 Okay. I'll shut the fucking dog up! 702 00:26:37,125 --> 00:26:38,125 Do you need Mommy's help? 703 00:26:38,126 --> 00:26:39,836 You think you can handle that? 704 00:26:39,837 --> 00:26:40,837 You got that, hon? 705 00:26:40,837 --> 00:26:42,422 Goddamn it! 706 00:26:42,463 --> 00:26:44,841 Hey, I know this is a terrible time. 707 00:26:44,882 --> 00:26:48,052 I'm so sorry, but, um, you're friends with Jessica Alba, right? 708 00:26:48,094 --> 00:26:49,846 - Yeah. - You are? 709 00:26:49,887 --> 00:26:52,056 Yeah, she's really sweet, actually. 710 00:26:52,098 --> 00:26:54,100 - Um... - Fuck off and die! 711 00:26:55,226 --> 00:26:56,227 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 712 00:26:56,269 --> 00:26:57,937 Oh, my God. Oh, no. 713 00:26:57,979 --> 00:26:59,397 No. 714 00:26:59,439 --> 00:27:01,274 - What's he doing? - Someone... 715 00:27:01,315 --> 00:27:03,109 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 716 00:27:03,151 --> 00:27:04,861 - Uh... - No, you should stay here. 717 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:07,780 Wait... 718 00:27:07,822 --> 00:27:09,115 He's got a gun. 719 00:27:09,157 --> 00:27:10,283 - He's got a gun. - Oh, my God. 720 00:27:10,324 --> 00:27:11,868 Oh, my God. 721 00:27:11,909 --> 00:27:12,909 Watch out. Watch out! 722 00:27:12,910 --> 00:27:15,079 Oh, my God. 723 00:27:15,121 --> 00:27:16,748 What did you do? 724 00:27:18,833 --> 00:27:20,460 I shut the dog up. 725 00:27:22,295 --> 00:27:24,922 Oh, no. 726 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:29,343 I shut it up. 727 00:27:29,385 --> 00:27:30,636 Oh, my God. 728 00:27:30,678 --> 00:27:32,638 Simon, please put that down. 729 00:27:34,682 --> 00:27:39,437 - What the fuck did you... - I shut the fucking dog up is what I did. 730 00:27:45,985 --> 00:27:49,322 Okay, easy, please. Please, please. 731 00:27:49,364 --> 00:27:53,326 No, no, no. 732 00:28:05,963 --> 00:28:10,009 I'm gonna come around you, okay? 733 00:28:10,051 --> 00:28:15,348 Hey. Just focus on me. 734 00:28:15,390 --> 00:28:17,558 All right? 735 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,478 That's good. That's good. 736 00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:24,524 Man, you must be in shock. 737 00:28:27,735 --> 00:28:30,530 You're not a bad person. 738 00:28:30,571 --> 00:28:34,450 We all have anger in us. 739 00:28:34,492 --> 00:28:36,869 I know. It's okay. 740 00:28:36,911 --> 00:28:38,079 It's okay. It's all right. 741 00:28:38,121 --> 00:28:39,622 It's good. Yeah, yeah. That's good. 742 00:28:39,664 --> 00:28:40,664 You don't wanna do this. 743 00:28:40,665 --> 00:28:42,917 Yeah. That's good. 744 00:28:42,959 --> 00:28:44,877 McEnroe! 745 00:28:47,213 --> 00:28:48,881 - Okay, Tory. - You all right? 746 00:28:48,923 --> 00:28:50,049 I got you. 747 00:28:50,091 --> 00:28:51,091 I got you. 748 00:28:51,092 --> 00:28:52,385 He just lost his mind? 749 00:28:52,427 --> 00:28:55,888 Oh, no! 750 00:28:55,930 --> 00:28:57,724 I'm so sorry. 751 00:30:12,632 --> 00:30:14,133 Nice shot, Dad. 52735

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.