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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:26,542 --> 00:00:27,958 "Sunday April 9th 2017" 2 00:00:28,083 --> 00:00:29,750 "Leo messi wins his 10th golden ball" 3 00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:28,625 At 6:15 am this morning an explosion was heard in o/iet, 4 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:31,083 the nearest city to the airport. 5 00:02:31,208 --> 00:02:35,958 When the police and firemen arrived the statue inaugurated in march 2011 6 00:02:36,083 --> 00:02:38,125 was almost destroyed. 7 00:02:38,250 --> 00:02:41,375 Nothing could be done but put out the few flames. 8 00:02:41,875 --> 00:02:44,792 The remnants of "the fabra statue" 9 00:02:44,917 --> 00:02:47,917 spread within a 2 km radius. 10 00:02:48,125 --> 00:02:50,667 Nobody was injured 11 00:02:51,042 --> 00:02:56,250 and no one claimed responsibility for the attack, one of the many blasts 12 00:02:56,583 --> 00:02:58,833 that occurred over the last years 13 00:02:58,958 --> 00:03:01,583 in the most emblematic places of the crisis. 14 00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:08,042 We woke up with some news that set all the alarm bells ringing. 15 00:03:08,167 --> 00:03:11,792 The European central bank refused Spain its third rescue. 16 00:03:12,083 --> 00:03:16,917 The unemployment rate reached 7 million, 380 thousand more... 17 00:03:55,958 --> 00:03:59,208 The falling gdp alarming figures, 18 00:03:59,333 --> 00:04:02,958 the weak growth forecast for 2018 19 00:04:03,083 --> 00:04:05,833 and the bundestag opposition 20 00:04:05,958 --> 00:04:09,500 are the reasons brought by the European institution 21 00:04:09,625 --> 00:04:12,750 to deny some breathing space to the Spanish state. 22 00:04:12,875 --> 00:04:15,125 Today we Spaniards woke up 23 00:04:15,250 --> 00:04:17,625 a bit poorer, if that's possible, a bit more humiliated 24 00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:19,917 and, of course, much wearier. 25 00:04:20,042 --> 00:04:23,417 The future is still unknown, 26 00:04:23,667 --> 00:04:26,750 ten years after the 2007 crisis 27 00:04:26,917 --> 00:04:30,625 plunged the country in a deadlock from which we can't step out. 28 00:04:30,833 --> 00:04:35,292 With untrustworthy political parties engaged in internal strife, 29 00:04:35,500 --> 00:04:38,042 even the more conservative experts 30 00:04:38,167 --> 00:04:42,458 defend a radical change in the economic model structure, 31 00:04:42,625 --> 00:04:46,042 but nobody is able to take control and lay the foundations 32 00:04:46,167 --> 00:04:47,833 so that this can be done. 33 00:05:12,417 --> 00:05:14,333 Sports: Barca is willing 34 00:05:14,542 --> 00:05:17,542 to pay up to 120 million of the former euro 35 00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:19,208 for the crimean player 36 00:05:19,375 --> 00:05:22,250 vasi/ikoff, a new record in the transfer market. 37 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,583 Yesterday never ends 38 00:06:00,708 --> 00:06:01,833 Hello? 39 00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:17,167 Hello? 40 00:07:36,042 --> 00:07:37,458 There's no one here? 41 00:07:42,042 --> 00:07:43,042 Nobody... 42 00:07:57,292 --> 00:08:00,708 - You've got here early. - Yes, there wasn't much traffic. 43 00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,125 And the plane arrived on time. 44 00:08:11,167 --> 00:08:12,542 How windy it is, eh? 45 00:08:14,750 --> 00:08:15,792 Yes. 46 00:08:25,167 --> 00:08:27,667 Have you got this kind of wind over there? 47 00:08:28,917 --> 00:08:30,250 Over there? Yes. 48 00:08:31,125 --> 00:08:32,125 Yes... 49 00:08:33,083 --> 00:08:35,500 Well, sometimes. 50 00:08:38,083 --> 00:08:39,167 Not always. 51 00:08:40,667 --> 00:08:43,833 I don't know why I always imagine Germany as windy. 52 00:08:44,583 --> 00:08:48,083 Windy and with grey skies. Lead grey. 53 00:08:49,458 --> 00:08:50,917 Not where I live. 54 00:08:53,708 --> 00:08:57,417 It's very green. Trees and all that. 55 00:08:58,333 --> 00:08:59,792 Lots of parks... 56 00:09:07,083 --> 00:09:08,208 How nice... 57 00:09:15,458 --> 00:09:16,667 You haven't changed. 58 00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:20,458 Don't get too close. 59 00:09:37,792 --> 00:09:39,917 It arrived the day before yesterday. 60 00:09:40,083 --> 00:09:42,625 I wasn't sure that it would arrive in time. 61 00:09:47,042 --> 00:09:48,458 Yes. 62 00:09:48,667 --> 00:09:50,583 I could fix things so that I could come. 63 00:09:51,542 --> 00:09:52,833 Luckily. 64 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,417 Luckily. 65 00:09:56,792 --> 00:10:00,542 I called you, but you didn't answer. I decided to come. 66 00:10:02,667 --> 00:10:04,958 - You called me? - Yes. 67 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,583 You didn't usually phone, you've changed. 68 00:10:11,958 --> 00:10:13,958 I came because of the letter. 69 00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:19,042 A letter seemed more appropriate. 70 00:10:19,167 --> 00:10:21,875 Now that nobody writes them. 71 00:10:22,208 --> 00:10:23,708 More in earnest. 72 00:10:24,042 --> 00:10:27,667 - An email didn't seem to be... - Yes, it is. 73 00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:31,292 More in earnest. More... 74 00:10:32,583 --> 00:10:33,583 Did you go...? 75 00:10:37,542 --> 00:10:39,042 - No. - No? 76 00:10:41,792 --> 00:10:43,000 You know... 77 00:10:44,458 --> 00:10:46,583 We've spoken about it a lot. 78 00:10:50,875 --> 00:10:52,458 Listen... there's nobody here. 79 00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:56,542 I don't know. 80 00:10:57,542 --> 00:10:58,958 There's nobody here. 81 00:11:03,958 --> 00:11:05,750 They're moving everybody out. 82 00:11:06,292 --> 00:11:09,083 Almost everyone is in the new place. 83 00:11:09,292 --> 00:11:12,875 The official is coming with the papers, he was tied up. 84 00:11:13,958 --> 00:11:16,333 We're going to be the only ones who...? 85 00:11:17,417 --> 00:11:19,917 Actually we're the last ones. 86 00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:27,333 This is a disgrace. 87 00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:29,375 This is a disgrace! 88 00:11:31,875 --> 00:11:34,750 What? That we're the last ones? 89 00:11:37,500 --> 00:11:38,875 That... well. 90 00:11:41,917 --> 00:11:44,417 That they're moving people out... no? 91 00:11:51,458 --> 00:11:53,458 You've been away a long time. 92 00:11:54,250 --> 00:11:55,917 What do you mean by that? 93 00:11:57,167 --> 00:11:58,750 Here and now, it's normal. 94 00:11:59,083 --> 00:12:01,583 Not here or anywhere it's normal. 95 00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:05,125 I no longer know what is normal or not. 96 00:12:07,125 --> 00:12:11,042 You and I here? Chatting as if it were normal. 97 00:12:12,750 --> 00:12:14,125 Talking about the wind. 98 00:12:15,333 --> 00:12:16,375 About grey skies. 99 00:12:18,792 --> 00:12:20,167 Orwhether I have 100 00:12:20,333 --> 00:12:22,208 more or fewer wrinkles than before. 101 00:12:22,417 --> 00:12:23,708 Son of a bitch. 102 00:12:24,208 --> 00:12:26,750 I think you look good. Seriously. 103 00:12:32,708 --> 00:12:35,958 It's very nice of you. Even if you're not sincere. 104 00:12:36,208 --> 00:12:37,417 Bastard. 105 00:12:38,542 --> 00:12:39,792 Coward. 106 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:42,083 Shhbag. 107 00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:44,833 I'm sincere. 108 00:12:45,542 --> 00:12:47,167 You also look good. 109 00:12:50,167 --> 00:12:51,167 Thank you. 110 00:12:51,500 --> 00:12:54,292 I like yourjacket. Is it a Hugo boss? 111 00:12:57,625 --> 00:12:58,625 Yes, Hugo boss. 112 00:12:58,833 --> 00:13:00,292 It makes you... 113 00:13:01,542 --> 00:13:02,792 Hunky. 114 00:13:04,125 --> 00:13:06,000 Formal. Manly. 115 00:13:06,292 --> 00:13:07,583 Mature. 116 00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:10,750 Alpha male? 117 00:13:11,292 --> 00:13:13,375 - That's it. - Thanks for saying it. 118 00:13:13,708 --> 00:13:16,667 When we went clothes shopping together I always... 119 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:20,500 Looked at your face to know whether I should buy something. 120 00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,208 You're doing ok without me. 121 00:13:22,333 --> 00:13:23,333 Well. 122 00:13:24,875 --> 00:13:29,833 I changed clothes five times before choosing this outfit, 123 00:13:30,708 --> 00:13:33,042 but... well, six really. 124 00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:34,625 Oh, well. 125 00:13:36,458 --> 00:13:40,000 So, you've arranged to meet someone here about...? 126 00:13:40,792 --> 00:13:42,750 There's no arranged time. 127 00:13:43,708 --> 00:13:47,625 They'll let me know when they're about to get here. 128 00:13:48,125 --> 00:13:49,333 Oh, I thought... 129 00:13:49,625 --> 00:13:52,333 Both our signatures are needed. 130 00:13:52,458 --> 00:13:55,125 But they didn't know when exactly. They'll call me. 131 00:13:55,250 --> 00:13:56,625 Of course. 132 00:13:56,958 --> 00:13:58,667 Both our signatures. 133 00:14:01,750 --> 00:14:03,292 I find this... 134 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,000 -Very difficult. We”... 135 00:14:07,292 --> 00:14:11,083 - Let's see what the options are... - No. This. 136 00:14:11,750 --> 00:14:15,875 - I mean all this. You and me. Here. - Yes. 137 00:14:16,375 --> 00:14:18,875 That we have to be here after... 138 00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,708 I don't know anything about you. 139 00:14:23,917 --> 00:14:26,583 You don't know anything about my life. 140 00:14:28,417 --> 00:14:31,458 And I don't know what to say. And... I need to pee. 141 00:14:31,875 --> 00:14:33,167 I am peeing myself. 142 00:14:33,625 --> 00:14:35,917 I think there's a toilet over there... 143 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:37,708 I'll be right back. 144 00:14:50,583 --> 00:14:51,708 Yes? 145 00:14:53,667 --> 00:14:54,875 She's here. 146 00:14:57,167 --> 00:14:59,750 No, she's gone to the toilet. 147 00:15:02,375 --> 00:15:03,708 We're waiting... 148 00:15:05,458 --> 00:15:06,833 Yes. We're waiting. 149 00:15:09,250 --> 00:15:11,917 On your behalf of course. 150 00:15:13,417 --> 00:15:15,750 I'll call you when I know something. 151 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,708 Ok? Bye. 152 00:15:32,250 --> 00:15:33,500 What a relief... 153 00:15:42,583 --> 00:15:44,708 So, you think I haven't changed... 154 00:15:45,917 --> 00:15:47,667 Well, yes. You have changed. 155 00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:50,542 Yes. 156 00:15:51,667 --> 00:15:53,125 You're more... 157 00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:00,250 Goonm 158 00:16:02,292 --> 00:16:04,708 well... you've matured. 159 00:16:07,625 --> 00:16:09,125 In a spiritual sense. 160 00:16:11,208 --> 00:16:13,125 You're more mature. Wiser. 161 00:16:19,042 --> 00:16:20,667 - Yes. - Oh, yes? 162 00:16:20,792 --> 00:16:22,000 Here's hoping... 163 00:16:37,375 --> 00:16:39,042 I'm glad to see you. 164 00:16:42,375 --> 00:16:43,500 Seriously. 165 00:16:47,208 --> 00:16:51,333 I was thinking all the way here: 166 00:16:51,542 --> 00:16:53,083 "What will she look like?" 167 00:16:57,125 --> 00:16:58,917 "Will she still hate me?" 168 00:17:00,208 --> 00:17:02,000 "Will she ever have hated me?" 169 00:17:04,167 --> 00:17:06,500 "Can poison be stronger than thirst?" 170 00:17:08,292 --> 00:17:09,583 "And mimosas?" 171 00:17:11,917 --> 00:17:14,875 "Will she remember that every February I went mad..." 172 00:17:15,167 --> 00:17:19,083 "Trying to find her a bunch before the florists' ran out of them?" 173 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:23,458 Or that boring dinner... 174 00:17:24,625 --> 00:17:27,958 When we couldn't stop touching each other under the table. 175 00:17:31,292 --> 00:17:32,917 When I touched herfoot... 176 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,208 Years later when we were together 177 00:17:37,875 --> 00:17:41,167 and I said astonished, because I really was astonished, 178 00:17:41,375 --> 00:17:45,542 that I still got a hard-on by just touching her foot. 179 00:17:46,458 --> 00:17:49,292 "Look what you do to me", I said to her. 180 00:17:50,208 --> 00:17:52,000 Where is that moment? 181 00:17:54,167 --> 00:17:56,792 When you look at someone you love... 182 00:17:57,500 --> 00:18:01,833 And would drown in their eyes because you only want to be there. 183 00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:06,333 The house we went one summer 184 00:18:07,833 --> 00:18:09,708 and what we said. 185 00:18:14,833 --> 00:18:15,833 The promises. 186 00:18:16,083 --> 00:18:17,542 The promises that... 187 00:18:18,167 --> 00:18:19,458 I said to her: 188 00:18:21,750 --> 00:18:23,167 "I'll fight for you." 189 00:18:23,583 --> 00:18:26,500 "Whatever happens I'll fight for you." 190 00:18:31,792 --> 00:18:33,417 And I remembered 191 00:18:34,917 --> 00:18:36,792 the first time that I saw you. 192 00:18:38,167 --> 00:18:39,750 The first time? 193 00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:41,458 I thought about the last time. 194 00:18:42,208 --> 00:18:44,375 I hope that you're glad to see me, too. 195 00:18:56,125 --> 00:18:58,125 Do you know what I find strange? 196 00:18:59,833 --> 00:19:00,833 What? 197 00:19:02,292 --> 00:19:05,083 It's such a pain when things happen 198 00:19:06,583 --> 00:19:08,625 when you don't really need them. 199 00:19:11,208 --> 00:19:12,333 Do you mean me? 200 00:19:13,625 --> 00:19:14,833 As well. 201 00:19:18,667 --> 00:19:20,125 So you mean that... 202 00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:28,583 It doesn't matter to you that I'm here? 203 00:19:30,458 --> 00:19:33,125 - I didn't say that. - Yes, you did. 204 00:19:34,208 --> 00:19:38,083 - But it wasn't what I meant to say. - Ok. 205 00:19:38,750 --> 00:19:40,625 You mean to say... 206 00:19:42,583 --> 00:19:44,458 That you don't need me anymore. 207 00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:47,250 Of course not. 208 00:19:48,292 --> 00:19:49,667 All right. 209 00:19:51,375 --> 00:19:54,125 Don't be upset, it's positive. 210 00:19:54,458 --> 00:19:56,500 Stop needing something. 211 00:19:56,625 --> 00:20:00,167 Be able to do without something. Someone. 212 00:20:01,042 --> 00:20:04,208 Besides, isn't that what women always get blamed for? 213 00:20:05,542 --> 00:20:07,792 - You neverdepended on me. - Never. 214 00:20:11,667 --> 00:20:14,000 Well, are you glad that I'm here or not? 215 00:20:21,625 --> 00:20:23,083 Let's go outside? 216 00:20:26,167 --> 00:20:27,292 All right. 217 00:20:29,667 --> 00:20:31,583 - Leave it there. - Yes. 218 00:22:25,667 --> 00:22:27,208 The wind is lessening. 219 00:22:28,042 --> 00:22:29,042 Yes. 220 00:22:49,875 --> 00:22:51,625 I'm glad that you're here. 221 00:22:52,917 --> 00:22:54,792 That we are here. 222 00:22:55,333 --> 00:22:58,833 That we have to be here now. Together. 223 00:22:59,917 --> 00:23:03,292 Cast away in the sea. 80 as to speak. 224 00:23:05,375 --> 00:23:08,250 You feel like that? Cast away in the sea? 225 00:23:15,333 --> 00:23:16,542 In a way. 226 00:23:17,833 --> 00:23:19,042 In which way? 227 00:23:21,042 --> 00:23:24,958 Well like... cast away... whatever. Forget it. 228 00:23:28,167 --> 00:23:29,625 I guess it's a metaphor. 229 00:23:30,333 --> 00:23:31,917 Yes. That's it. 230 00:23:47,875 --> 00:23:49,833 Are you sure it was today? 231 00:23:52,583 --> 00:23:56,542 - Don't you trust me? - Yes, of course, it's just that... 232 00:23:56,750 --> 00:23:59,542 Don't you remember that I never forget these things? 233 00:24:01,250 --> 00:24:05,875 The year that Dorothy Parker died. What Oscar wilde said before dying. 234 00:24:06,167 --> 00:24:08,125 Pepe isbert in "the executioner": 235 00:24:08,417 --> 00:24:11,708 "How blissful I was the happiest day of my life!" 236 00:24:13,375 --> 00:24:18,125 The time and day you left home five years ago and didn't come back. 237 00:24:23,542 --> 00:24:25,042 The 31st of December. 238 00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:30,167 At ten to seven. 239 00:24:31,958 --> 00:24:35,875 I looked at the clock and thought it was a strange time to go out. 240 00:24:38,167 --> 00:24:39,333 I'm sorry. 241 00:24:40,375 --> 00:24:41,708 I'm sorry. 242 00:24:41,875 --> 00:24:43,792 I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. 243 00:24:45,167 --> 00:24:48,958 - You're sorry... - Yes. It's true. I'm really sorry. 244 00:24:51,250 --> 00:24:52,375 I'm sorry. 245 00:24:58,750 --> 00:25:02,583 "Or the wallpaper goes or I do." Oscar wilde. 246 00:25:04,042 --> 00:25:05,917 What did you do that night? 247 00:25:06,125 --> 00:25:07,625 I went to my mother's. 248 00:25:08,708 --> 00:25:11,125 Yes. Well. 249 00:25:11,917 --> 00:25:13,125 Well... 250 00:25:16,875 --> 00:25:18,542 Just before midnight I stopped at 251 00:25:18,667 --> 00:25:20,167 a petrol station. 252 00:25:22,375 --> 00:25:25,667 There was a couple screwing in the parking lot. 253 00:25:27,583 --> 00:25:29,625 Ours were the only cars there... 254 00:25:32,125 --> 00:25:36,292 The petrol station was closed. New year's Eve. Saint Sylvester. 255 00:25:39,750 --> 00:25:41,500 I thought about her 256 00:25:42,458 --> 00:25:43,750 at home, in ourflat, 257 00:25:43,958 --> 00:25:47,750 about the prawns I'd taken out to defreeze before leaving. 258 00:25:50,042 --> 00:25:54,250 I saw the couple screwing and I saw myself in the car with my phone 259 00:25:56,875 --> 00:26:00,042 and have neverfelt so disconnected from the world. 260 00:26:00,833 --> 00:26:04,458 As if all the bonds that tied me to life had been broken. 261 00:26:04,583 --> 00:26:06,083 As though I were... 262 00:26:08,667 --> 00:26:12,042 Swimming in the dark. A darkness without end. 263 00:26:14,375 --> 00:26:16,042 Without beginning or end. 264 00:26:20,292 --> 00:26:23,167 And I knew I would never call her ever again. 265 00:26:26,125 --> 00:26:28,417 That I could never return to that house. 266 00:26:30,208 --> 00:26:34,167 That the prawns would go off and she would throw them away 267 00:26:34,292 --> 00:26:37,333 and... she would hate me for a time. 268 00:26:41,583 --> 00:26:45,958 - But that was the way it had to be. - I looked at the clock. 6:50 pm. 269 00:26:47,333 --> 00:26:48,833 Such a strange time. 270 00:26:51,042 --> 00:26:52,208 A strange time. 271 00:26:54,250 --> 00:26:56,750 I felt a strange relief when he left. 272 00:26:59,208 --> 00:27:02,125 Now, every time he left the house, I felt relief 273 00:27:03,500 --> 00:27:06,000 and I was ashamed to feel relief. 274 00:27:07,375 --> 00:27:09,125 The prawns. 275 00:27:09,958 --> 00:27:11,583 The striking of the bells. 276 00:27:13,208 --> 00:27:14,625 The twelve grapes. 277 00:27:15,625 --> 00:27:16,750 The fireworks. 278 00:27:19,333 --> 00:27:21,000 I wanted to be alone. 279 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:24,458 Alone in bed with a bottle of wine 280 00:27:26,042 --> 00:27:28,917 and a 500 page detective novel. 281 00:27:29,958 --> 00:27:31,375 Or 600 pages. 282 00:27:37,875 --> 00:27:40,333 I didn't want to hear anybody's voice, 283 00:27:42,375 --> 00:27:44,208 not even his. 284 00:27:47,708 --> 00:27:50,125 Why did I buy prawns? 285 00:27:51,292 --> 00:27:53,000 And frozen besides! 286 00:27:54,667 --> 00:27:56,875 We didn't like prawns at all. 287 00:27:57,250 --> 00:28:00,875 When they stopped screwing, she got out of the car, 288 00:28:01,875 --> 00:28:04,750 laughing, and made herway to the toilets. 289 00:28:06,292 --> 00:28:10,417 She complained because they were shut. He came out after her and... 290 00:28:11,167 --> 00:28:13,750 Stupid things stay engraved on your mind 291 00:28:15,625 --> 00:28:20,458 while other things, important things, are forgotten. 292 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:23,250 It's weird 293 00:28:24,542 --> 00:28:28,125 how often we do something we don't really want to do... 294 00:28:30,958 --> 00:28:32,458 Do you mean that night, 295 00:28:32,667 --> 00:28:34,750 - now orwhat? - In general. 296 00:28:35,792 --> 00:28:38,083 In general. I'm talking about myself. 297 00:28:39,792 --> 00:28:43,750 The number of times that I do something I don't really want to do 298 00:28:46,250 --> 00:28:49,417 and the times I don't do something I really want to. 299 00:28:49,833 --> 00:28:52,458 I think the same thing happened that night... 300 00:28:54,458 --> 00:28:57,542 Don't bother apologising. Is this an apology? 301 00:28:57,792 --> 00:28:59,000 No, it isn't. 302 00:28:59,833 --> 00:29:01,292 It's a revelation 303 00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:06,000 that's come to light later on. Much iateron. 304 00:29:06,250 --> 00:29:09,167 We probably all come to the same conclusion. 305 00:29:09,292 --> 00:29:11,542 - Do you think so? - Yes. 306 00:29:11,792 --> 00:29:13,625 To the same conclusions. 307 00:29:15,167 --> 00:29:16,958 And what is your conclusion? 308 00:29:17,250 --> 00:29:19,000 Do you think that's funny? 309 00:29:20,958 --> 00:29:23,083 Coming from you. It amuses me. 310 00:29:25,292 --> 00:29:26,625 If you say so. 311 00:29:27,625 --> 00:29:29,292 Now you're taking offense? 312 00:29:29,917 --> 00:29:31,375 What a bastard! 313 00:29:33,333 --> 00:29:35,042 No. No. No! 314 00:29:35,167 --> 00:29:36,208 - No? - No! 315 00:29:36,875 --> 00:29:38,792 What a fucking bastard! 316 00:29:40,167 --> 00:29:41,250 But? 317 00:29:43,042 --> 00:29:45,167 - Nothing, no buts. - None? 318 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,708 "In the sun's path" 319 00:30:03,500 --> 00:30:05,250 "in the breeze's footprints" 320 00:30:06,625 --> 00:30:08,917 "where the world and the sky meet" 321 00:30:09,792 --> 00:30:12,125 "he will ride the silver seas" 322 00:30:13,417 --> 00:30:15,542 "he will cut the glittering wave" 323 00:30:18,833 --> 00:30:20,542 "I will sit at home" 324 00:30:21,667 --> 00:30:23,042 "I will sway" 325 00:30:24,792 --> 00:30:27,708 "I will stand up to answer a neighbour's call" 326 00:30:28,750 --> 00:30:31,250 "I will make a tea and I will cut the thread" 327 00:30:32,625 --> 00:30:34,792 "I will wash my bed sheets" 328 00:30:37,792 --> 00:30:39,500 "and he will be called brave" 329 00:30:40,042 --> 00:30:41,958 - I'd rather not be... - What? 330 00:30:42,917 --> 00:30:46,167 - I'd rather not be here, that's true. - Yeah, well... 331 00:30:46,292 --> 00:30:47,625 Neitherwould you. 332 00:30:48,792 --> 00:30:52,375 But we are waiting for a man with some papers. 333 00:30:52,583 --> 00:30:56,500 Five years on. Who will tell us what they are going to do... 334 00:30:57,208 --> 00:30:58,208 We have to listen 335 00:30:58,417 --> 00:30:59,792 before we talk. 336 00:31:00,208 --> 00:31:04,333 What options there are and the cost. 337 00:31:04,750 --> 00:31:06,042 What did you say? 338 00:31:08,625 --> 00:31:09,875 What? 339 00:31:10,250 --> 00:31:12,792 The cost. Something will have to be paid, or? 340 00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:17,958 What the fuck are you talking about? We're talking about Dani! 341 00:31:18,542 --> 00:31:20,333 Did you have a lobotomy made in Germany! 342 00:31:20,458 --> 00:31:23,500 I didn't mean it that way! Not like that! 343 00:31:23,667 --> 00:31:26,875 - What the fuck do you mean then? - Not that way! 344 00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,000 I swear I didn't mean it 345 00:31:29,125 --> 00:31:30,375 that way! 346 00:31:32,542 --> 00:31:35,625 - That's disgusting! - I'm only saying that in Germany 347 00:31:35,750 --> 00:31:39,833 when a cemetery is expropriated to build a bloody casino, 348 00:31:40,042 --> 00:31:42,583 the people would get something! 349 00:31:42,708 --> 00:31:47,417 - Ask for a compensation! - Or there would be fucking protests! 350 00:31:48,500 --> 00:31:51,000 Or whatever! I don't know, forgive me! 351 00:31:52,833 --> 00:31:54,000 Forgive me. 352 00:32:09,500 --> 00:32:10,708 Have you got any chocolate? 353 00:32:12,958 --> 00:32:15,458 Yes. As usual. Do you want some? 354 00:32:18,708 --> 00:32:21,833 Well, at least I'm glad you haven't changed in that. 355 00:32:31,167 --> 00:32:34,583 - I try not to eat so much now... - Me too... 356 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:56,000 Do you know 357 00:32:56,042 --> 00:32:57,750 the worst thing of an addiction? 358 00:33:01,542 --> 00:33:03,102 That it's difficult to get rid of it... 359 00:33:05,208 --> 00:33:07,083 That it's easy to acquire it. 360 00:33:08,375 --> 00:33:11,000 You start off with half a tablet. 361 00:33:11,750 --> 00:33:13,292 And another day the other half. 362 00:33:14,625 --> 00:33:15,875 Then a whole one. 363 00:33:17,750 --> 00:33:21,333 But not everyday. Only when it's really necessary. 364 00:33:22,542 --> 00:33:24,083 But it is, every day. 365 00:33:25,583 --> 00:33:26,792 In the morning. 366 00:33:27,500 --> 00:33:28,500 At midday. 367 00:33:29,542 --> 00:33:30,875 In the afternoon. 368 00:33:31,333 --> 00:33:32,458 At night. 369 00:33:33,667 --> 00:33:34,750 To go to sleep. 370 00:33:36,208 --> 00:33:37,583 To waken up. 371 00:33:42,500 --> 00:33:45,375 To stroll in the street and see a child... 372 00:33:48,250 --> 00:33:51,542 And not feel an iron band squeezing your heart. 373 00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:58,208 So as not to how! Like a dog. 374 00:34:03,125 --> 00:34:05,000 To breathe without it hurting you. 375 00:34:06,875 --> 00:34:08,167 To fit in. 376 00:34:13,458 --> 00:34:14,500 And now? 377 00:34:16,250 --> 00:34:17,792 What do you do now? 378 00:34:21,167 --> 00:34:22,958 Now I do other things. 379 00:34:24,167 --> 00:34:25,750 So as not to howl. 380 00:34:28,875 --> 00:34:32,000 Yes. 80 as not to scare people. 381 00:34:34,833 --> 00:34:35,833 What do you do? 382 00:34:38,167 --> 00:34:39,292 Things. 383 00:34:40,375 --> 00:34:41,375 Wait! 384 00:34:41,625 --> 00:34:43,000 Don't toss it. 385 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,917 Do you still translate? 386 00:34:55,417 --> 00:34:56,583 That's finished. 387 00:34:58,958 --> 00:35:01,042 Publishing houses stopped calling. 388 00:35:01,292 --> 00:35:03,750 Not just me, everyone. 389 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:10,208 Our friends, the ones who could afford it they left. Everybody is... 390 00:35:10,708 --> 00:35:12,208 In Norway, in england, 391 00:35:12,750 --> 00:35:17,125 - in Germany. - In my university there are a few... 392 00:35:18,625 --> 00:35:21,958 Do you get together? To talk about our appalling news? 393 00:35:23,500 --> 00:35:27,708 Do you drink mojitos celebrating how well you did fleeing? 394 00:35:28,042 --> 00:35:32,000 No, no mojitos. They don't make them properly there. 395 00:35:32,625 --> 00:35:34,667 They drink more beer. 396 00:35:37,667 --> 00:35:39,500 You could, too. Escape. 397 00:35:39,625 --> 00:35:42,417 I mean change places... 398 00:35:42,750 --> 00:35:44,417 Emigrate. 399 00:35:45,917 --> 00:35:47,333 I could? 400 00:35:48,625 --> 00:35:50,750 And let the shit hit the fan? 401 00:35:52,167 --> 00:35:55,208 - It's already hit it. - Yeah. Well. 402 00:35:56,167 --> 00:35:59,375 Someone will have to clean it up. 403 00:35:59,667 --> 00:36:03,583 Or hide it. Or blow it up. Or do something with that shit. 404 00:36:04,125 --> 00:36:08,125 So that's what you do. Something. Things. 405 00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:13,917 You used to say that everybody wants to change the world, 406 00:36:14,042 --> 00:36:16,458 but nobody wants to take out the garbage. 407 00:36:18,167 --> 00:36:21,250 So as not to take pills. 408 00:36:21,542 --> 00:36:23,875 I don't do it so as not to take pills. 409 00:36:24,875 --> 00:36:26,125 Idoitbecause 410 00:36:26,292 --> 00:36:27,708 someone has to do it. 411 00:36:28,625 --> 00:36:29,917 I do it for Dani. 412 00:36:44,458 --> 00:36:46,083 Look... 413 00:36:48,708 --> 00:36:52,458 - Leave Dani out of this! - No. 414 00:36:57,042 --> 00:36:59,792 I can't. You know why. 415 00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:01,667 It was an accident. 416 00:37:04,583 --> 00:37:09,000 It could've happened in any country. At another time and circumstances. 417 00:37:09,333 --> 00:37:13,042 But it wasn't in another country or time or under other circumstances! 418 00:37:17,875 --> 00:37:19,458 I ran as hard as I could. 419 00:37:21,042 --> 00:37:23,083 We ran as hard as we could. 420 00:37:23,542 --> 00:37:26,042 It was late, too late. 421 00:37:27,375 --> 00:37:28,750 We were far away. 422 00:37:31,042 --> 00:37:33,083 It took them five hours to attend him. 423 00:37:33,292 --> 00:37:35,917 Five hours. 300 minutes! 424 00:37:36,083 --> 00:37:38,708 It could have happened everywhere! 425 00:37:38,833 --> 00:37:41,042 But why are you obsessed by that? 426 00:37:41,250 --> 00:37:43,833 It was here. It was along weekend. 427 00:37:43,958 --> 00:37:45,667 The cutbacks were here... 428 00:37:45,833 --> 00:37:50,042 My son didn't have a chance. 429 00:37:52,667 --> 00:37:55,125 Five hours is a long time! 430 00:37:56,208 --> 00:38:00,292 I don't ever want to go to sleep at night for the rest of my life 431 00:38:01,333 --> 00:38:05,417 thinking that this could happen to another person, to another child. 432 00:38:05,625 --> 00:38:08,167 Well. "Things." Now, I understand. 433 00:38:09,500 --> 00:38:13,750 Now, you're an activist. You've become committed. 434 00:38:13,958 --> 00:38:16,292 - I know you. - I'm sorry. 435 00:38:16,417 --> 00:38:18,625 - Don't laugh at me. - Excuse me. 436 00:38:18,958 --> 00:38:20,708 I do what I can. 437 00:38:21,625 --> 00:38:24,208 And how do you live? 438 00:38:24,625 --> 00:38:30,167 In five years you didn't give a shit about me and now you're concerned? 439 00:38:30,292 --> 00:38:31,500 - Yes. - You are insulting me. 440 00:38:31,625 --> 00:38:33,708 I'm here with you. 441 00:38:33,917 --> 00:38:35,708 I don't feel like telling you. 442 00:38:36,333 --> 00:38:37,542 Don't answer me then. 443 00:38:40,833 --> 00:38:44,083 I live in a car that's just about as old as I am. 444 00:38:44,208 --> 00:38:48,417 I have a pirated mobile phone and a shattered PC. I'm a squatter. 445 00:38:48,542 --> 00:38:50,462 Do you know how many empty houses there are here? 446 00:38:50,583 --> 00:38:55,417 3,417,064 houses. 447 00:38:55,583 --> 00:38:58,000 Who are they keeping them for? 448 00:38:58,167 --> 00:38:59,708 Why so many homeless evicted people 449 00:38:59,833 --> 00:39:01,833 and so many toxic banks with so many houses? 450 00:39:01,958 --> 00:39:05,000 Though here a toxic bank is now a good one. 451 00:39:06,083 --> 00:39:07,958 Fuck the toxic banks! 452 00:39:08,542 --> 00:39:12,208 I live in a car whose tyres are dying on me. With a shitty PC. 453 00:39:12,375 --> 00:39:14,333 I haven't any dreams left. 454 00:39:15,042 --> 00:39:16,625 I had some. 455 00:39:17,208 --> 00:39:18,833 Many dreams. 456 00:39:20,625 --> 00:39:21,625 Not anymore. 457 00:39:22,458 --> 00:39:25,000 I want to feel that I'm doing something. 458 00:39:25,417 --> 00:39:26,917 Does that make sense? 459 00:39:27,500 --> 00:39:29,250 Probably not for you. 460 00:39:30,625 --> 00:39:34,875 And sometimes not even for me. Something. I don't know. 461 00:39:41,375 --> 00:39:42,792 A new life. 462 00:39:43,500 --> 00:39:45,833 A new place. A new job. 463 00:39:46,458 --> 00:39:49,583 New friends. And that entitles you to... 464 00:39:50,542 --> 00:39:51,875 You know what? 465 00:39:53,750 --> 00:39:56,667 Nothing's the same as before. 466 00:39:58,833 --> 00:40:00,083 - Never. - No... 467 00:40:01,625 --> 00:40:03,917 You'd like to wipe everything out. 468 00:40:04,875 --> 00:40:05,875 And begin again? 469 00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:11,375 And begin again. 470 00:40:12,958 --> 00:40:14,583 Where would you begin? 471 00:40:15,958 --> 00:40:18,042 From which day would you start? 472 00:40:18,458 --> 00:40:21,167 How do you know it would be better? 473 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,292 That's the most stupid thing you have ever said. 474 00:40:28,458 --> 00:40:30,208 A question... 475 00:40:34,583 --> 00:40:36,708 An incredibly stupid question. 476 00:40:37,333 --> 00:40:38,333 I know. 477 00:40:43,375 --> 00:40:46,583 I still miss him. The same as before. 478 00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:56,708 Don't you miss him? 479 00:40:57,792 --> 00:40:58,875 Yes. 480 00:41:00,625 --> 00:41:03,917 I think about him every day. 481 00:41:05,542 --> 00:41:07,250 But, do you miss him? 482 00:41:08,167 --> 00:41:11,625 I don't really know what it is I have to miss. 483 00:41:11,958 --> 00:41:12,958 So you don't. 484 00:41:23,917 --> 00:41:26,542 Suffering is addictive. 485 00:41:27,083 --> 00:41:29,542 Like drinking, like drugs. 486 00:41:29,708 --> 00:41:32,417 Like alcohol or gambling. 487 00:41:34,625 --> 00:41:37,250 Do you think I am addicted to suffering? 488 00:41:38,750 --> 00:41:40,208 It sounds... 489 00:41:41,625 --> 00:41:45,750 Heartless. Remote. As if it had nothing to do with you. 490 00:41:46,917 --> 00:41:50,125 Apart from your professor's opinion. 491 00:41:50,625 --> 00:41:53,625 Your male professor's opinion. 492 00:41:54,250 --> 00:41:56,542 About life. About suffering. 493 00:41:56,667 --> 00:42:00,000 What is a male professor's opinion? 494 00:42:01,250 --> 00:42:06,625 The idea that one controls one's own life and one's own suffering. 495 00:42:07,417 --> 00:42:09,167 You don't believe in that? 496 00:42:10,958 --> 00:42:13,000 You've always thought that 497 00:42:13,167 --> 00:42:17,208 for self-advancement you have to learn. 498 00:42:17,708 --> 00:42:20,083 That question makes me puke. 499 00:42:21,208 --> 00:42:24,167 - You don't always learn something. - Ok. 500 00:42:24,292 --> 00:42:28,708 That life is crap sometimes. For unexplainable reasons. 501 00:42:29,167 --> 00:42:30,208 - Ok? - All right. 502 00:42:30,333 --> 00:42:31,792 All right then. 503 00:42:37,958 --> 00:42:39,458 Chocolate makes me thirsty. 504 00:42:39,625 --> 00:42:42,792 - What? - Chocolate makes me thirsty. 505 00:42:43,125 --> 00:42:46,958 - Do you want to have a drink? - There's nothing near here. 506 00:42:48,375 --> 00:42:53,125 I've got some things in the car. Wine. Cheese. Bread. 507 00:42:59,500 --> 00:43:02,500 The sausage is nice. Is it from Germany? 508 00:43:06,292 --> 00:43:09,208 - Not the wine. - I see that. 509 00:43:13,833 --> 00:43:15,750 It's all very strange, isn't it? 510 00:43:18,208 --> 00:43:19,208 What? 511 00:43:19,375 --> 00:43:23,250 I mean that nobody's come or called you... 512 00:43:25,083 --> 00:43:26,125 Isn't it? 513 00:43:27,458 --> 00:43:29,042 They're moving. 514 00:43:29,792 --> 00:43:31,667 And there isn't much staff. 515 00:43:32,458 --> 00:43:36,000 The man seemed very stressed out on the phone. 516 00:43:42,083 --> 00:43:45,833 It's strange to think that soon this will be a huge parking lot 517 00:43:47,042 --> 00:43:50,208 and people will park here and go off to gamble their money. 518 00:43:52,708 --> 00:43:55,792 And there'll be hotels and neon lights and such. 519 00:43:57,500 --> 00:43:58,542 I don't know. 520 00:43:59,417 --> 00:44:02,500 Celine Dion might perform here. Orworse still. 521 00:44:02,667 --> 00:44:05,042 Even worse? Coldplay? 522 00:44:06,458 --> 00:44:08,125 And people working. 523 00:44:08,583 --> 00:44:09,833 Badly paid. 524 00:44:10,292 --> 00:44:12,125 With slave shifts 525 00:44:12,625 --> 00:44:15,833 that 15 years ago would have been forbidden. 526 00:44:16,083 --> 00:44:18,833 People will come to gamble away their wages. 527 00:44:19,042 --> 00:44:21,458 And people many miles away getting rich, 528 00:44:21,583 --> 00:44:23,500 exploiting their employees 529 00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:26,542 and the punters. 530 00:44:27,875 --> 00:44:32,042 Women from all over Europe being exploited by everybody. 531 00:44:36,958 --> 00:44:40,833 Nameless people, only acronyms that nobody knows what they mean. 532 00:44:41,083 --> 00:44:42,542 Corporations. 533 00:44:44,458 --> 00:44:47,458 And all this where our Dani was buried. 534 00:44:48,458 --> 00:44:51,250 People banging their heads against the wall in protest. 535 00:44:51,583 --> 00:44:55,375 Well, objectively speaking, it's evident that he's not there. 536 00:44:58,708 --> 00:44:59,833 Jesus Christ! 537 00:45:01,250 --> 00:45:03,542 And if he isn't there, who is there? 538 00:45:03,667 --> 00:45:07,250 You haven't changed a bit. In all these years. Not a bit. 539 00:45:08,375 --> 00:45:12,000 - I try to see it from another angle. - What a load of shit! 540 00:45:13,167 --> 00:45:14,833 You try not to see anything. 541 00:45:16,792 --> 00:45:18,958 It's even difficult for you to say his name. 542 00:45:19,083 --> 00:45:20,917 Dani. Dani. 543 00:45:21,083 --> 00:45:22,917 Our Dani. 544 00:45:40,708 --> 00:45:41,875 Well. 545 00:45:47,875 --> 00:45:49,917 I expected this. Come on then. 546 00:45:51,667 --> 00:45:52,958 A head-on attack. 547 00:45:55,292 --> 00:45:57,625 Let's have it all. Get it off your chest. 548 00:46:08,333 --> 00:46:12,042 Why haven't you shown any sign of life during all these years? 549 00:46:13,542 --> 00:46:14,958 You want to know why now? 550 00:46:16,208 --> 00:46:18,750 Are you scared I'll puke up? 551 00:46:18,958 --> 00:46:21,167 Or that I'll smash your head open? 552 00:46:23,167 --> 00:46:25,208 It's not that easy. 553 00:46:27,583 --> 00:46:29,500 I can believe that. 554 00:46:30,042 --> 00:46:33,375 Or would you prefer to tell me, firstly, why you went? 555 00:46:33,750 --> 00:46:35,375 You know it perfectly well. 556 00:46:36,042 --> 00:46:38,292 A small explanation would help. 557 00:46:38,458 --> 00:46:41,833 Will it change anything? Once I've told you, what then? 558 00:46:42,750 --> 00:46:46,583 Nothing. But sometimes it's nice to know that you were right, 559 00:46:47,542 --> 00:46:49,958 even by hindsight. 560 00:46:50,875 --> 00:46:54,750 Is it about someone being right? For fuck's sake! 561 00:46:58,375 --> 00:47:02,000 Why are you suddenly behaving... Differently? 562 00:47:02,792 --> 00:47:04,792 I don't know you. 563 00:47:05,625 --> 00:47:08,375 Why can't we speak like civilised people? 564 00:47:09,125 --> 00:47:11,792 - Like civilised people? - Yes, please. 565 00:47:12,292 --> 00:47:16,542 Like civilised people? Is this fucking situation any civilised? 566 00:47:16,875 --> 00:47:18,500 This isn't civilised. 567 00:47:18,875 --> 00:47:20,667 Not the slightest bit. 568 00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:24,625 Differently, when? You and I before, when? 569 00:47:26,375 --> 00:47:27,375 Well, that's it! 570 00:47:33,292 --> 00:47:34,625 You know what? 571 00:47:37,083 --> 00:47:39,042 I'm not glad to see you. 572 00:47:50,583 --> 00:47:51,958 If that's so, 573 00:47:54,375 --> 00:47:55,667 I'd better go. 574 00:47:56,083 --> 00:47:58,667 Hey! That rings a bell. Sure, go! 575 00:48:03,625 --> 00:48:07,708 You've only got to say that you want me to stay. That's all. 576 00:48:19,250 --> 00:48:20,375 Coward. 577 00:48:26,500 --> 00:48:27,667 What did you say? 578 00:48:31,958 --> 00:48:33,333 What did you say? 579 00:48:34,500 --> 00:48:36,250 I'm not going to allow it. 580 00:48:37,042 --> 00:48:39,375 I'm not going to allow you to... 581 00:48:41,167 --> 00:48:42,375 That you... 582 00:48:45,417 --> 00:48:48,208 That you with everything... 583 00:48:51,125 --> 00:48:53,375 I didn't come all the way here for this. 584 00:48:55,417 --> 00:48:56,583 Goodbye. 585 00:48:57,917 --> 00:48:59,042 I'm sorry. 586 00:49:00,250 --> 00:49:01,875 Sorry, sorry! 587 00:49:07,208 --> 00:49:09,042 You've put on weight. 588 00:49:09,750 --> 00:49:11,042 Not much. 589 00:49:18,875 --> 00:49:20,333 You're compact. 590 00:49:22,875 --> 00:49:25,083 - Do you go to a gym? - Give over. 591 00:49:34,458 --> 00:49:36,375 Do you take care of yourself? 592 00:49:38,458 --> 00:49:41,250 A man on his own never takes care of himself... 593 00:49:43,500 --> 00:49:45,625 Do you take care of yourself? 594 00:49:52,708 --> 00:49:55,208 Do you eat out a lot? 595 00:49:57,875 --> 00:49:59,083 Do you cook a lot? 596 00:50:00,417 --> 00:50:02,042 No. Not anymore. 597 00:50:06,792 --> 00:50:08,708 My wife does the cooking. 598 00:50:28,250 --> 00:50:31,792 I hoped that we... today. 599 00:50:32,333 --> 00:50:34,667 Both of us could start something good, 600 00:50:34,833 --> 00:50:37,375 something new. 601 00:50:39,167 --> 00:50:41,667 That's what I wanted. Really. 602 00:50:41,792 --> 00:50:43,292 Start something good... 603 00:50:47,292 --> 00:50:50,125 I'm sorry. That's stupid, isn't it? 604 00:51:17,667 --> 00:51:19,750 Have you known herfor long? 605 00:51:26,625 --> 00:51:27,708 Two years. 606 00:51:31,167 --> 00:51:32,458 - Two years? - Yes. 607 00:51:32,625 --> 00:51:34,042 - Two years? - Yes. 608 00:51:34,917 --> 00:51:36,167 Two years? 609 00:51:37,458 --> 00:51:38,500 Yes. 610 00:51:40,208 --> 00:51:41,583 Two years! 611 00:51:44,458 --> 00:51:46,708 You have been married for two years. 612 00:51:49,083 --> 00:51:50,500 Fuck. 613 00:52:10,750 --> 00:52:12,167 I was happy. 614 00:52:13,292 --> 00:52:15,708 No, it wasn't the day that Dani was born. 615 00:52:16,583 --> 00:52:20,917 "The happiest day of my life was... my child." No. 616 00:52:22,500 --> 00:52:25,458 A child has nothing to do with happiness. 617 00:52:26,208 --> 00:52:28,542 That's something else. 618 00:52:29,333 --> 00:52:31,375 That's to feel yourself whole. 619 00:52:33,417 --> 00:52:35,708 Although life is meaningless, 620 00:52:36,667 --> 00:52:38,750 there is a meaning to all this. 621 00:52:39,083 --> 00:52:42,125 A mystery full of meaning. Or whatever. 622 00:52:47,042 --> 00:52:50,208 I was happy for a day or the five minutes 623 00:52:50,417 --> 00:52:52,792 I thought someone loved me. 624 00:52:53,833 --> 00:52:55,833 When he said... 625 00:52:56,458 --> 00:52:58,625 What do you see when you look at me? 626 00:53:00,042 --> 00:53:01,083 Seriously. 627 00:53:06,500 --> 00:53:07,583 You're laughing. 628 00:53:08,417 --> 00:53:11,083 If laughing makes you feel better, great. 629 00:53:11,208 --> 00:53:12,500 Fucking great! 630 00:53:14,667 --> 00:53:18,333 A Saturday afternoon. In a house that some people let us use. 631 00:53:18,625 --> 00:53:23,583 Dancing to "hello, stranger". After having swum. After fucking. 632 00:53:24,792 --> 00:53:26,458 When he said to me: 633 00:53:31,333 --> 00:53:33,042 "I'll fight for you" 634 00:53:34,417 --> 00:53:38,500 in that voice he has, or had, when he was serious. 635 00:53:40,292 --> 00:53:41,667 "I'll fight for you." 636 00:53:43,542 --> 00:53:44,708 I'm sorry. 637 00:53:45,458 --> 00:53:48,625 I didn't mean to hurt yourfeelings, sir. 638 00:53:48,750 --> 00:53:51,042 You haven't hurt my feelings, miss. 639 00:54:01,125 --> 00:54:04,625 I asked you what do you see when you look at me. That's all. 640 00:54:04,750 --> 00:54:06,292 Stop acting like an idiot! 641 00:54:08,208 --> 00:54:09,542 What do you see? 642 00:54:11,250 --> 00:54:12,750 I spy with my little eyes... 643 00:54:12,958 --> 00:54:14,542 Truthfully. 644 00:54:18,958 --> 00:54:20,250 Isee... 645 00:54:21,083 --> 00:54:23,583 - A Hugo boss jacket. - Come on. 646 00:54:31,375 --> 00:54:32,833 What do you see? 647 00:54:33,083 --> 00:54:35,458 - I see a man. - A happy man? 648 00:54:36,625 --> 00:54:38,000 A wretch? 649 00:54:38,208 --> 00:54:39,667 Isee... 650 00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:44,083 I see it's beginning 651 00:54:44,792 --> 00:54:47,583 to rain. In a moment. 652 00:54:48,625 --> 00:54:49,625 Right. 653 00:54:50,167 --> 00:54:52,250 - It's going to rain. - And? 654 00:54:52,375 --> 00:54:55,375 - Nothing. I love rain. - You used to like the rain. 655 00:54:55,500 --> 00:54:58,792 - I still like it. - I didn't know. 656 00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:02,125 - But I don't like stupid questions. - I see. 657 00:55:03,375 --> 00:55:05,250 I asked what do you see when you look at me. 658 00:55:05,375 --> 00:55:07,417 A stupid question. 659 00:55:08,542 --> 00:55:09,625 Fair enough. 660 00:55:11,667 --> 00:55:13,708 - You won't answer. - What do you want me to say? 661 00:55:13,875 --> 00:55:16,958 What you see when you look at me! 662 00:55:23,000 --> 00:55:26,000 - I see imperfection. - You see an imperfect man? 663 00:55:26,708 --> 00:55:31,917 I see a bastard who left me on new year's Eve at ten to seven 664 00:55:33,125 --> 00:55:36,042 because he didn't have the balls to keep his word. 665 00:55:36,917 --> 00:55:41,958 "I' I! Fight for you" he said, afterwe had conceived a child. 666 00:55:44,667 --> 00:55:49,250 And when that child died and something in me died along with him, 667 00:55:51,250 --> 00:55:53,875 he left, he didn't fight. 668 00:55:54,958 --> 00:55:56,375 He didn't do anything. 669 00:55:58,292 --> 00:56:00,833 I see it's about to rain, 670 00:56:01,000 --> 00:56:04,083 I'm freezing and I want to go back inside. 671 00:56:04,417 --> 00:56:07,917 - You look better with your hair loose. - Let's go back in. 672 00:58:25,542 --> 00:58:27,000 I'm writing a book. 673 00:58:33,167 --> 00:58:34,167 What? 674 00:58:34,208 --> 00:58:35,417 A book. 675 00:58:40,625 --> 00:58:42,375 One of your essays? 676 00:58:42,583 --> 00:58:44,250 No. A novel. 677 00:58:45,417 --> 00:58:46,750 A novel? 678 00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:54,208 I didn't know you were inclined... That way. 679 00:58:55,417 --> 00:58:58,458 I thought you loved books too much to write one. 680 00:58:58,583 --> 00:59:01,208 - That's what you said. - It's something... 681 00:59:02,583 --> 00:59:03,792 New. 682 00:59:09,833 --> 00:59:11,083 Fiction? 683 00:59:11,625 --> 00:59:12,958 A large part of it. 684 00:59:24,042 --> 00:59:26,167 Don't you want to know what it's about? 685 00:59:26,917 --> 00:59:28,958 No. Not interested. 686 00:59:30,417 --> 00:59:33,083 - Don't you want...? - No. I don't want to know. 687 00:59:37,042 --> 00:59:38,417 It's about a man. 688 00:59:39,208 --> 00:59:41,667 You could say that he's me, or a part of me... 689 00:59:41,792 --> 00:59:45,042 - Or I'm a part of this man... - I don't want to hear about it. 690 00:59:45,958 --> 00:59:49,708 - And a boy. - I don't want to hear about it! 691 00:59:52,625 --> 00:59:55,042 - The man suffers... - No! 692 01:00:00,333 --> 01:00:02,042 I want to tell my story. 693 01:00:02,625 --> 01:00:03,833 My novel... 694 01:00:05,167 --> 01:00:10,292 - The idea of telling something so... - Do you think that's strange? 695 01:00:14,042 --> 01:00:15,625 So intimate. 696 01:00:15,750 --> 01:00:18,042 The history of literature is full... 697 01:00:18,833 --> 01:00:20,792 - For fuck's sake. - What? 698 01:00:21,958 --> 01:00:24,208 So, it will be part of the history of literature? 699 01:00:24,417 --> 01:00:26,917 I understand that you're cynical... 700 01:00:28,792 --> 01:00:31,250 I'm not cynical. 701 01:00:31,375 --> 01:00:33,417 - No? - No, no.No. 702 01:00:33,625 --> 01:00:35,708 I find it... 703 01:00:35,917 --> 01:00:37,042 Too intimate? 704 01:00:37,958 --> 01:00:39,708 I find it pathetic. 705 01:00:45,333 --> 01:00:46,833 What's pathetic? 706 01:00:47,500 --> 01:00:48,875 You are pathetic. 707 01:00:51,125 --> 01:00:53,042 Trading with... 708 01:00:54,167 --> 01:00:56,958 With your pain. With him. With me. 709 01:00:57,500 --> 01:01:00,583 - Leave me out of this story. - That's not it. 710 01:01:02,292 --> 01:01:03,667 I only want to... 711 01:01:05,542 --> 01:01:07,417 Need to... 712 01:01:09,750 --> 01:01:12,750 Find a place for it. 713 01:01:16,250 --> 01:01:20,375 Now we're with the bloody jargon of shitty self-help books. 714 01:01:20,917 --> 01:01:23,583 Because you have to find a place for pain 715 01:01:23,708 --> 01:01:26,833 as though it were an object. 716 01:01:27,125 --> 01:01:30,542 No. My life isn't a book that can be closed. 717 01:01:33,000 --> 01:01:34,000 I see. 718 01:01:35,625 --> 01:01:38,250 Do you prefer to identify with your pain? 719 01:01:38,708 --> 01:01:41,583 - I am my pain. As well. - Are you? 720 01:01:41,708 --> 01:01:42,708 Yes! 721 01:01:44,375 --> 01:01:46,333 That's why you've really come? 722 01:01:46,458 --> 01:01:48,833 - To get my blessing? - No. 723 01:01:48,958 --> 01:01:52,000 What did you come for? To get material for your book? 724 01:01:52,542 --> 01:01:53,667 Where... wait. 725 01:01:54,417 --> 01:01:56,083 The end. The final redemption. 726 01:01:56,208 --> 01:01:59,333 Where the father and the mother of the dead child hold hands 727 01:01:59,458 --> 01:02:01,083 in front of the boy's tomb... 728 01:02:01,208 --> 01:02:03,167 I didn't expect you to like it. 729 01:02:10,958 --> 01:02:14,375 I write it for you, too. And for me. For us. 730 01:02:14,583 --> 01:02:16,375 What do you mean "us"? 731 01:02:16,500 --> 01:02:17,667 What "us"? 732 01:02:18,625 --> 01:02:20,542 "Us" doesn't exist anymore. 733 01:02:21,292 --> 01:02:23,250 What the fuck are we? 734 01:02:27,375 --> 01:02:30,917 We are a man and a woman who lost their child. 735 01:02:33,625 --> 01:02:35,500 Who first lost their child. 736 01:02:37,292 --> 01:02:38,583 And then lost each other. 737 01:02:38,708 --> 01:02:42,083 Or perhaps I should say who first lost their child, 738 01:02:43,667 --> 01:02:45,333 then themselves, 739 01:02:47,125 --> 01:02:48,542 and later on each other. 740 01:03:04,083 --> 01:03:05,083 Listen... 741 01:03:06,500 --> 01:03:08,208 Please, listen to me. 742 01:03:14,542 --> 01:03:19,125 If you only feel pain when you think about somebody. 743 01:03:21,667 --> 01:03:26,292 Somebody who you've loved so much, so much that... 744 01:03:28,750 --> 01:03:30,958 Aren't you doing something wrong, 745 01:03:31,375 --> 01:03:34,125 something very wrong? 746 01:03:37,958 --> 01:03:39,417 I feel the pain. 747 01:03:40,292 --> 01:03:44,208 - It's my right. I can't help it. - Is it? 748 01:03:44,625 --> 01:03:46,125 - Yes! - Pain. 749 01:03:47,208 --> 01:03:48,708 I lost a child. 750 01:03:50,292 --> 01:03:51,875 We lost a child. 751 01:03:54,083 --> 01:03:56,417 I have the right 752 01:03:57,583 --> 01:03:59,292 to every iota of my pain. 753 01:03:59,583 --> 01:04:00,583 Right. 754 01:04:00,792 --> 01:04:02,500 Imagine you had another child. 755 01:04:02,667 --> 01:04:04,083 - No! - Just imagine. 756 01:04:04,250 --> 01:04:06,292 - I don't want to! - Would you have the right to be 757 01:04:06,417 --> 01:04:11,042 an aggrieving mother or father? Would that be fair for the child? 758 01:04:11,750 --> 01:04:15,917 We were advised to have another child, as if it had been a pet. 759 01:04:17,917 --> 01:04:20,083 Maybe we should have done that... 760 01:04:21,083 --> 01:04:22,542 You're not serious, are you? 761 01:04:22,708 --> 01:04:24,625 Yes, I'm speaking seriously. 762 01:04:29,333 --> 01:04:32,583 I don't know what I see when I look at you. Really. 763 01:04:41,417 --> 01:04:44,375 Do you get over things if you don't carry on? 764 01:04:45,333 --> 01:04:47,250 No, on the contrary. 765 01:04:48,125 --> 01:04:50,583 Perhaps you don't, but it's worth trying. 766 01:05:06,333 --> 01:05:07,417 What? 767 01:05:10,375 --> 01:05:14,208 - You've fathered another child? - No. What does that matter? 768 01:05:14,500 --> 01:05:17,458 That's why you've come. Are you a father? 769 01:05:17,792 --> 01:05:18,992 - Look at me! - Does it matter? 770 01:05:19,042 --> 01:05:22,542 I came because you asked me to. 771 01:05:22,667 --> 01:05:25,208 I came because you asked me to! 772 01:05:28,292 --> 01:05:29,809 I wanted you to come because I thought... 773 01:05:29,833 --> 01:05:31,333 Why? 774 01:05:31,750 --> 01:05:36,375 You wanted to find out if I was as desperate as you? 775 01:05:37,000 --> 01:05:40,667 Two castaways hanging on to a buoy? 776 01:05:42,708 --> 01:05:44,250 A boy or a girl? 777 01:05:45,375 --> 01:05:47,250 I don't have any children. 778 01:05:50,750 --> 01:05:53,083 You're lying. You're lying! 779 01:05:53,458 --> 01:05:55,667 You're lying! 780 01:05:58,375 --> 01:05:59,667 Not yet... 781 01:06:05,833 --> 01:06:07,583 Hanna is pregnant. 782 01:06:36,875 --> 01:06:38,292 - Hanna? - Yes. 783 01:06:54,625 --> 01:06:57,042 - Hanna is pregnant? - Yes. 784 01:07:07,542 --> 01:07:08,958 And it's yours? 785 01:07:11,375 --> 01:07:12,375 Yes. 786 01:07:22,833 --> 01:07:25,708 - How old is she? - Hanna? 787 01:07:32,500 --> 01:07:34,208 What difference does that make? 788 01:07:35,083 --> 01:07:36,625 What difference does that make? 789 01:08:11,500 --> 01:08:13,167 Is she one of your students? 790 01:08:22,458 --> 01:08:27,292 Or a young lecturer, a teacher, good-looking, German... 791 01:08:27,833 --> 01:08:31,875 Without a fucked up past... And your mother must adore her. 792 01:08:35,083 --> 01:08:36,375 My god! 793 01:08:39,625 --> 01:08:42,333 Tell me! Is she one of your students? 794 01:08:42,500 --> 01:08:43,917 How bitter you are! 795 01:08:44,792 --> 01:08:47,875 You think you're the only one who feels any pain? 796 01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:51,958 The only one who feels grief and pain, who suffers. 797 01:08:52,458 --> 01:08:54,333 Your son. Your loss. 798 01:08:54,458 --> 01:08:56,667 Your suffering. As if I never existed! 799 01:08:58,167 --> 01:09:03,042 You were away on one of your shitty seminars, you weren't there. 800 01:09:03,208 --> 01:09:06,000 Not the same old story again! Please! 801 01:09:08,333 --> 01:09:12,500 I called you, and you said that you were on your way to the hospital. 802 01:09:12,792 --> 01:09:15,958 I left everything, grabbed the first plane. 803 01:09:16,083 --> 01:09:20,542 How do you think I felt every minute after speaking to you? 804 01:09:20,667 --> 01:09:22,542 In the plane. In the taxi. 805 01:09:23,667 --> 01:09:27,000 You didn't answer the phone... How did I feel? 806 01:09:32,083 --> 01:09:33,667 You weren't there. 807 01:09:35,583 --> 01:09:37,583 With my child in my arms! 808 01:09:39,375 --> 01:09:42,167 - Holding him... - I wasn't there. 809 01:09:42,458 --> 01:09:44,750 - I wasn't there! - Waiting for five eternal hours. 810 01:09:44,875 --> 01:09:47,500 - Surrounded by screaming people. - But I felt it all right. 811 01:09:47,625 --> 01:09:49,083 I felt it here. 812 01:09:49,208 --> 01:09:51,667 And here. All over me! 813 01:09:53,833 --> 01:09:55,167 I wasn't there... 814 01:09:56,667 --> 01:10:01,667 I felt it all right. All over my body! And in my head! 815 01:10:10,708 --> 01:10:13,333 When I was first in Cologne, 816 01:10:13,458 --> 01:10:14,958 I went running a lot. 817 01:10:15,208 --> 01:10:16,750 I ran for kilometers. 818 01:10:17,292 --> 01:10:19,708 Uphill. Downhill. Everywhere. 819 01:10:20,167 --> 01:10:23,750 Through woods. Do you know why? To make the pain go away. 820 01:10:24,917 --> 01:10:27,458 But the more you run, the farther away you are. 821 01:10:27,708 --> 01:10:29,333 From everything. 822 01:10:32,625 --> 01:10:34,792 More and more lost. More drugged. More... 823 01:10:38,333 --> 01:10:40,125 That's what happens to you. 824 01:10:42,042 --> 01:10:44,792 But luckily at the end of the ride 825 01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:47,500 there was Hanna to take you to... 826 01:10:48,042 --> 01:10:52,042 - To her hansel and gretel house. - Let it be! Please. 827 01:10:54,083 --> 01:10:54,958 - Yes. - Yes. 828 01:10:55,083 --> 01:10:57,000 And maybe one day, 829 01:10:57,292 --> 01:10:59,000 after coming back 830 01:10:59,125 --> 01:11:00,333 from buying furniture 831 01:11:00,542 --> 01:11:05,417 for the nursery room you thought, didn't I have a son in Spain 832 01:11:08,042 --> 01:11:09,958 who caught meningitis 833 01:11:11,083 --> 01:11:15,042 on along weekend and the emergency was saturated? 834 01:11:20,042 --> 01:11:23,625 - Let it be, please. - But life must go on and... 835 01:11:23,833 --> 01:11:26,750 - Don't start... - Life must go on. 836 01:11:28,750 --> 01:11:34,583 And a great idea popped up in your brain: I'll write a book... 837 01:11:35,125 --> 01:11:38,750 - About how sad it was. - Leave off, leave off now! 838 01:11:39,708 --> 01:11:41,083 About... 839 01:11:42,833 --> 01:11:44,458 About yourself. 840 01:11:45,167 --> 01:11:48,792 About myself and how difficult it all was, 841 01:11:49,750 --> 01:11:53,708 but you had to dig in your brain because you couldn't remember. 842 01:11:55,167 --> 01:11:58,208 But your poor ex-wife could help you 843 01:11:59,208 --> 01:12:01,167 because she's never healed... 844 01:12:03,125 --> 01:12:06,792 She remembers every moment. Every detail. 845 01:12:09,042 --> 01:12:12,375 The Jersey he was wearing. The socks. 846 01:12:15,167 --> 01:12:16,750 His little face... 847 01:12:24,125 --> 01:12:26,792 - His little face... - Leave off now. 848 01:12:27,750 --> 01:12:29,167 Don't touch me! 849 01:12:34,208 --> 01:12:35,500 I'm sorry. 850 01:12:36,833 --> 01:12:38,750 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... 851 01:12:48,750 --> 01:12:51,000 You're still angry because I left. 852 01:12:51,833 --> 01:12:55,458 People run away from other people's pain as if they were sick. 853 01:12:55,958 --> 01:12:59,083 They don't know what to do or how to behave. 854 01:12:59,500 --> 01:13:01,042 Friends vanish. 855 01:13:02,625 --> 01:13:04,875 And deep down, you don't really care. 856 01:13:06,500 --> 01:13:11,875 It's as if your worst imaginings about human nature are confirmed. 857 01:13:20,042 --> 01:13:25,583 It's amazing the way you keep on wallowing in your pain. 858 01:13:26,792 --> 01:13:30,875 Five years after you wallow in your pain as in a hot bath. 859 01:13:31,417 --> 01:13:33,500 That's fucking amazing! 860 01:13:33,625 --> 01:13:36,625 You've got no fucking idea! 861 01:13:36,875 --> 01:13:39,042 - No? - Of course not. 862 01:13:40,125 --> 01:13:42,000 Five years without showing a sign of life. 863 01:13:42,125 --> 01:13:43,792 - Yeah. - And then... 864 01:13:44,042 --> 01:13:47,333 - Then what? - Then this! This shit! 865 01:13:47,792 --> 01:13:51,250 This. Yes, this shit. 866 01:13:51,875 --> 01:13:53,500 Do you know what I thought? 867 01:13:54,000 --> 01:13:55,833 I'd hoped that some of this shit 868 01:13:56,083 --> 01:13:57,542 would have changed... 869 01:13:58,625 --> 01:14:01,458 - Don't try to understand me. - Yes. 870 01:14:01,583 --> 01:14:04,250 - I try because you're my ex-wife. - Don't try... 871 01:14:04,375 --> 01:14:09,208 We share a past, a mutual story that will never disappear. 872 01:14:10,917 --> 01:14:12,667 Whatever we do now. 873 01:14:15,083 --> 01:14:16,125 You know? 874 01:14:17,708 --> 01:14:19,375 That's what I wanted. 875 01:14:21,375 --> 01:14:22,542 I wanted to 876 01:14:24,083 --> 01:14:26,417 turn over a new leaf... That we do it together... 877 01:14:28,458 --> 01:14:29,917 A new leaf. 878 01:14:33,750 --> 01:14:38,000 How good you're getting with metaphors since you're a writer. 879 01:14:39,917 --> 01:14:44,333 You demean yourself with all that sarcastic shit. 880 01:14:45,542 --> 01:14:47,917 That's not like you. 881 01:14:48,542 --> 01:14:51,625 I'm not going to keep on listening to this. 882 01:14:52,167 --> 01:14:54,083 So you're leaving again? 883 01:14:54,333 --> 01:14:55,792 This is nonsense. 884 01:14:56,000 --> 01:14:57,708 I can't stand it. 885 01:15:01,250 --> 01:15:02,750 We don't manage it. 886 01:15:08,208 --> 01:15:09,833 I'd better be going. 887 01:15:22,000 --> 01:15:24,375 There's one more thing I'd like to say. 888 01:15:26,167 --> 01:15:28,667 When I was coming here, I thought... 889 01:15:32,542 --> 01:15:35,500 About how beautiful you were the day we conceived Dani. 890 01:15:36,792 --> 01:15:39,208 The shine in your dazzling eyes. 891 01:15:40,000 --> 01:15:42,042 The softness of your skin. 892 01:15:42,625 --> 01:15:45,083 Dancing on that hill for the fun of it. 893 01:15:47,667 --> 01:15:49,083 Laughing. 894 01:15:52,292 --> 01:15:54,167 How proud I felt of... 895 01:15:54,917 --> 01:15:58,542 Existing. That you existed, that we met in life. 896 01:16:00,875 --> 01:16:01,875 That's what 897 01:16:02,083 --> 01:16:03,833 I wanted to get back. 898 01:16:06,667 --> 01:16:09,375 And I remembered that song that you liked so much. 899 01:16:11,833 --> 01:16:16,042 I had forgotten, you know? And I had completely forgotten... 900 01:16:17,708 --> 01:16:19,500 I had said "I'll fight for you", 901 01:16:20,167 --> 01:16:22,583 and your lovely face when you smile. 902 01:18:03,000 --> 01:18:04,833 It's my car, it won't start. 903 01:18:06,500 --> 01:18:07,667 Well, 904 01:18:08,125 --> 01:18:09,458 it starts... 905 01:18:12,500 --> 01:18:13,958 But I can't start. 906 01:18:17,458 --> 01:18:19,625 Someone wants to close the gate. 907 01:18:22,000 --> 01:18:23,792 I asked him to leave it open. 908 01:18:28,833 --> 01:18:30,208 He told me... 909 01:18:34,667 --> 01:18:36,083 About the works. 910 01:18:39,167 --> 01:18:43,333 That they never thought seriously about building a casino... 911 01:18:45,250 --> 01:18:47,083 That it was only a rumour. 912 01:18:49,833 --> 01:18:51,875 That no one is going to be moved. 913 01:19:02,167 --> 01:19:04,917 They could have done it, they're capable of it. 914 01:19:05,042 --> 01:19:08,208 - Yes. - Now anything is possible here. 915 01:19:08,708 --> 01:19:09,708 Yes. 916 01:19:13,792 --> 01:19:15,500 A very nice man. 917 01:19:18,542 --> 01:19:20,000 Yes, he's very nice. 918 01:19:23,292 --> 01:19:26,042 - You hate me, don't you? - No. 919 01:19:27,000 --> 01:19:28,042 Do you love me? 920 01:19:30,750 --> 01:19:33,375 - I know you hate me. - No, I don't hate you. 921 01:19:34,833 --> 01:19:36,292 Of course I love you. 922 01:19:39,417 --> 01:19:42,042 If you don't hate me, then what? 923 01:19:45,458 --> 01:19:47,958 You want to hear me say I love you. 924 01:19:50,042 --> 01:19:52,333 Hear me say that I still love you 925 01:19:53,000 --> 01:19:57,292 and then you'll say: I don't know... 926 01:20:01,708 --> 01:20:06,208 - Am I like that? So wicked? - Yes, 927 01:20:08,625 --> 01:20:10,042 you're so wicked. 928 01:20:13,083 --> 01:20:15,292 Well, I don't want to be like that. 929 01:20:16,625 --> 01:20:19,042 Yes, I know. 930 01:20:27,667 --> 01:20:30,875 You loved to watch people in trains. 931 01:20:33,292 --> 01:20:35,500 - Yes. - And read out loud 932 01:20:35,833 --> 01:20:39,500 the letters to the editor in different voices. 933 01:20:40,250 --> 01:20:41,708 How ridiculous. 934 01:20:44,292 --> 01:20:46,833 And flying chairs. 935 01:20:48,000 --> 01:20:51,542 - And watermelon lollipops. - Watermelon! 936 01:20:54,583 --> 01:20:59,083 And that apple pie that falls apart... 937 01:20:59,292 --> 01:21:02,958 - Apple crumble. - That's it. Apple crumble. 938 01:21:08,708 --> 01:21:12,708 You liked people who burst into tears when speaking. 939 01:21:13,292 --> 01:21:15,083 Like popeye's Olivia. 940 01:21:17,125 --> 01:21:19,667 A glass of wine with dessert. 941 01:21:23,417 --> 01:21:25,125 I get the feeling 942 01:21:26,500 --> 01:21:29,042 that my head is so crammed that I... 943 01:21:30,333 --> 01:21:31,917 That you can't forget. 944 01:21:32,417 --> 01:21:36,500 I've forgotten the names of Dani's favourite dinosaurs. 945 01:21:39,625 --> 01:21:43,958 The name of doraemon's friend. Of shin chan's voice. 946 01:21:45,667 --> 01:21:49,083 When my son asked for a cheese sandwich without cheese. 947 01:21:49,667 --> 01:21:52,917 - He's with me in my mind. Always. - I know. 948 01:21:56,542 --> 01:21:58,458 When I pour out the coffee. 949 01:22:00,417 --> 01:22:02,667 When I open a sachet of sugar. 950 01:22:04,417 --> 01:22:06,042 In the shower. 951 01:22:07,208 --> 01:22:08,917 Driving. 952 01:22:10,625 --> 01:22:12,208 At a news stand. 953 01:22:14,208 --> 01:22:17,542 In all the books. In all the songs. 954 01:22:18,375 --> 01:22:20,042 That Dani lives again. 955 01:22:21,042 --> 01:22:22,708 Sometimes I see a man. 956 01:22:24,417 --> 01:22:25,625 Any man. 957 01:22:28,125 --> 01:22:30,625 On a bike with a child riding pillion. 958 01:22:32,333 --> 01:22:34,958 The man points: "Look, look!" 959 01:22:35,792 --> 01:22:39,917 "Look a dog, oh, look a pigeon!" 960 01:22:41,792 --> 01:22:46,208 "Did you see that bird or that tree or that cloud?" 961 01:22:47,583 --> 01:22:49,208 And the child laughs. 962 01:22:54,917 --> 01:22:58,833 And for a moment I am that man and the child is him. 963 01:22:59,208 --> 01:23:00,542 Forgive me. 964 01:23:01,833 --> 01:23:04,167 Don't say that. 965 01:23:10,375 --> 01:23:11,750 But it's true! 966 01:23:13,458 --> 01:23:14,833 Sometimes... 967 01:23:16,292 --> 01:23:20,000 I see people who have gone through worst things 968 01:23:21,292 --> 01:23:23,458 and assimilate them. 969 01:23:24,458 --> 01:23:27,667 Catastrophes, wars. 970 01:23:27,792 --> 01:23:30,042 People who have lost a whole family. 971 01:23:30,583 --> 01:23:31,583 Yes. 972 01:23:31,958 --> 01:23:36,250 I hear them say that they're happy. I see that they are happy. 973 01:23:37,000 --> 01:23:40,792 Then I wonder what's wrong with me. What am I doing wrong? 974 01:23:43,042 --> 01:23:46,250 And only thinking about it... 975 01:23:47,708 --> 01:23:50,167 I can't go fonrvard. 976 01:23:55,667 --> 01:23:58,208 Why did you go that night? 977 01:23:58,667 --> 01:24:00,042 Why that night? 978 01:24:01,458 --> 01:24:03,000 I don't know. 979 01:24:03,958 --> 01:24:06,833 I didn't feel capable of counting up to twelve. 980 01:24:08,000 --> 01:24:10,125 Lift up a glass, toast. 981 01:24:10,750 --> 01:24:15,292 Make a wish. I couldn't look at you, hold you in my arms. I couldn't. 982 01:24:16,583 --> 01:24:17,833 I couldn't. 983 01:24:19,875 --> 01:24:22,625 Half a kilogram of prawns in the bucket. 984 01:24:27,667 --> 01:24:30,125 I stayed at the window all night long. 985 01:24:32,083 --> 01:24:33,958 With the lights off. 986 01:24:38,042 --> 01:24:41,417 I couldn't help thinking of those last moments with Dani. 987 01:24:42,583 --> 01:24:43,792 Yes. 988 01:24:45,125 --> 01:24:46,417 When... 989 01:24:47,833 --> 01:24:51,208 When they disconnected... 990 01:24:51,333 --> 01:24:53,042 The life support systems. 991 01:24:54,292 --> 01:24:56,583 The noise of that machine went... 992 01:24:57,833 --> 01:24:59,917 "Fiiiiuuuu..." 993 01:25:01,792 --> 01:25:04,125 "Fiiiiuuuu..." went the ventilator. 994 01:25:07,542 --> 01:25:10,625 - And the world stopped. - The world stopped. 995 01:25:13,625 --> 01:25:15,917 And that moment was shut up in my mind. 996 01:25:16,042 --> 01:25:19,333 That made me furious. 997 01:25:19,750 --> 01:25:21,917 Sometimes I felt like hitting you. 998 01:25:22,583 --> 01:25:26,125 So that you would begin to feel me. 999 01:25:26,458 --> 01:25:29,000 Feel me close again. 1000 01:25:29,542 --> 01:25:32,208 The father of your child, your husband... 1001 01:26:01,500 --> 01:26:05,167 I want to know how it is to feel again, being a bit happy. 1002 01:26:08,667 --> 01:26:10,833 I want someone to save me. 1003 01:26:11,958 --> 01:26:14,750 It doesn't work that way. 1004 01:26:15,833 --> 01:26:18,500 - It's easy for you to say that. - Why? 1005 01:26:18,667 --> 01:26:21,417 - Because“. - Why do you say that? 1006 01:26:21,583 --> 01:26:25,833 You have another country, another job, another wife. 1007 01:26:26,417 --> 01:26:30,333 - Another child. - Do you think that can save you? 1008 01:26:31,583 --> 01:26:34,583 Am I a bastard to let anyone save me? 1009 01:26:35,958 --> 01:26:36,958 No? 1010 01:26:37,833 --> 01:26:40,958 To hang on to someone and drag them down with me? 1011 01:26:43,000 --> 01:26:44,583 - Forgive me. - No. 1012 01:26:45,792 --> 01:26:47,125 Don't worry. 1013 01:26:47,500 --> 01:26:50,792 - I'm being unfairto you. - No. It doesn't matter. 1014 01:26:53,875 --> 01:26:54,917 It doesn't matter. 1015 01:26:56,583 --> 01:26:59,958 Do you know what saved me? Before meeting Hanna? 1016 01:27:01,125 --> 01:27:02,125 What? 1017 01:27:03,458 --> 01:27:05,500 - Singing. - Singing? 1018 01:27:05,625 --> 01:27:06,792 I sing in a choir. 1019 01:27:07,708 --> 01:27:09,125 - Really? - Yes. 1020 01:27:12,125 --> 01:27:14,625 Don't laugh! I sing in a choir. 1021 01:27:15,750 --> 01:27:18,500 We are 18 or so, depending on the day. 1022 01:27:18,625 --> 01:27:20,333 We practice twice a week. 1023 01:27:20,583 --> 01:27:23,417 And we perform in villages, nothing special... 1024 01:27:25,500 --> 01:27:27,458 One day I was on my way back from running, 1025 01:27:27,583 --> 01:27:32,583 I was passing by a small town council building, 1026 01:27:32,708 --> 01:27:34,000 near Cologne. 1027 01:27:34,667 --> 01:27:37,750 I sat on a bench because I couldn't go any farther. 1028 01:27:38,792 --> 01:27:40,333 And I heard a voice. 1029 01:27:41,167 --> 01:27:42,667 A very deep voice. 1030 01:27:42,792 --> 01:27:45,583 One of those that bounces off the walls. 1031 01:27:47,500 --> 01:27:51,667 Itwas singing in English. A song that... 1032 01:27:54,125 --> 01:27:59,250 I felt it was as if it were meant for me. 1033 01:27:59,500 --> 01:28:02,125 "It must be so", by Bernstein. Do you know it? 1034 01:28:03,875 --> 01:28:07,250 And I felt every one of the notes vibrate in my body. 1035 01:28:07,833 --> 01:28:10,250 As though I was singing it, too. 1036 01:28:10,500 --> 01:28:12,417 And suddenly... 1037 01:28:14,833 --> 01:28:16,167 Something... 1038 01:28:18,667 --> 01:28:20,917 Burst inside of me. 1039 01:28:22,833 --> 01:28:26,333 As if a fountain of tears 1040 01:28:26,583 --> 01:28:29,208 was pouring out inside of me. 1041 01:28:30,208 --> 01:28:31,208 And... 1042 01:28:32,667 --> 01:28:35,083 All my muscles relaxed, 1043 01:28:36,208 --> 01:28:37,667 and finally soothed. 1044 01:28:41,750 --> 01:28:43,708 An epiphany. 1045 01:28:44,083 --> 01:28:47,625 - Because some guy was singing? - Yes. 1046 01:28:48,375 --> 01:28:51,250 - What was the song called? - "It must be so." 1047 01:28:52,750 --> 01:28:55,792 Do you know how much I hate these kinds of stories? 1048 01:28:55,917 --> 01:28:56,917 Why? 1049 01:28:57,708 --> 01:29:01,958 Because those stories suddenly happen to some people, illogically. 1050 01:29:02,083 --> 01:29:07,042 - Really? - And no one else can repeat them... 1051 01:29:08,125 --> 01:29:10,000 They make it all so... 1052 01:29:12,000 --> 01:29:14,583 So elusive. 1053 01:29:15,167 --> 01:29:16,292 Elusive? 1054 01:29:16,833 --> 01:29:19,250 Yes, elusive, slippery, whatever. 1055 01:29:19,417 --> 01:29:24,208 As though you had to see the light. And I don't see anything. 1056 01:29:24,458 --> 01:29:27,083 - I haven't seen any light. - You know what I mean. 1057 01:29:27,292 --> 01:29:30,458 I haven't seen any light, I sing in a choir. 1058 01:29:31,083 --> 01:29:33,083 Where there are fat, slim, 1059 01:29:33,625 --> 01:29:36,833 dustmen, teachers, gays, heterosexuals. 1060 01:29:37,208 --> 01:29:39,208 We argue about our repertory. 1061 01:29:39,542 --> 01:29:41,958 Gays are obsessed with Broadway musicals. 1062 01:29:42,292 --> 01:29:45,375 Some Germans only want to sing lieders, schubert... 1063 01:29:46,375 --> 01:29:49,083 We practice twice a week. 1064 01:29:49,708 --> 01:29:52,375 And we travel around 1065 01:29:53,667 --> 01:29:57,167 in a dilapidated east German coach, 1066 01:29:57,542 --> 01:30:01,042 from world war ii. 1067 01:30:01,333 --> 01:30:04,167 We sing in schools, in places... 1068 01:30:07,750 --> 01:30:10,458 I can't trust in these things any more. 1069 01:30:12,167 --> 01:30:14,167 It could be another thing. 1070 01:30:14,667 --> 01:30:15,750 Your thing. 1071 01:30:16,625 --> 01:30:17,792 You know? 1072 01:30:26,708 --> 01:30:29,667 One day you can find another thing that helps you. 1073 01:30:32,583 --> 01:30:36,458 Just hearing that song made you feel glad to be alive? 1074 01:30:37,708 --> 01:30:39,500 Of course! Something like that. 1075 01:30:41,542 --> 01:30:43,000 Something like that. 1076 01:30:45,125 --> 01:30:49,917 Then I have to be grateful just because I can breathe 1077 01:30:51,750 --> 01:30:55,875 and my breasts aren't dugs yet. But they are! 1078 01:30:56,250 --> 01:30:57,333 Yes? 1079 01:30:58,792 --> 01:31:00,708 I always loved your breasts. 1080 01:31:12,833 --> 01:31:14,417 I want to leave here. 1081 01:31:15,833 --> 01:31:16,833 Now? 1082 01:31:20,208 --> 01:31:21,875 - Now I do. - All right... 1083 01:31:27,000 --> 01:31:29,125 Do you want to go somewhere else? 1084 01:31:30,958 --> 01:31:34,333 - Do you want me to go with you? - No. I want to go alone. 1085 01:31:34,458 --> 01:31:37,042 - I don't want you to leave this way. - It's all right. 1086 01:31:43,250 --> 01:31:44,625 Can I do anything for you? 1087 01:31:52,708 --> 01:31:54,833 Yes. Maybe give me a hug. 1088 01:31:57,458 --> 01:31:58,583 Come here. 1089 01:33:01,917 --> 01:33:03,708 - It's lovely. - Yes? 1090 01:33:03,833 --> 01:33:04,958 Yes. 1091 01:33:08,042 --> 01:33:10,042 I sing it badly. 1092 01:33:10,292 --> 01:33:11,917 I'm one of the worst in the choir. 1093 01:33:12,667 --> 01:33:14,333 It's lovely. Really. 1094 01:33:16,125 --> 01:33:17,792 Do you want us... 1095 01:33:19,125 --> 01:33:21,208 To go to Dani's tomb together? 1096 01:33:21,625 --> 01:33:25,375 - You go. I was there yesterday. - You don't want to...? 1097 01:33:25,500 --> 01:33:26,583 Really. 1098 01:33:27,333 --> 01:33:28,333 All right. 1099 01:33:32,500 --> 01:33:34,167 I sincerely hope 1100 01:33:34,292 --> 01:33:36,625 that everything goes well for you. 1101 01:33:36,750 --> 01:33:38,458 The baby... 1102 01:33:39,292 --> 01:33:40,458 And you? 1103 01:33:41,417 --> 01:33:43,167 -I'll be all right. Seriously? 1104 01:33:43,292 --> 01:33:44,292 Yes. 1105 01:33:45,750 --> 01:33:48,833 Keep me up to date. 1106 01:33:49,667 --> 01:33:52,833 Isuppose you won't want to come... 1107 01:33:52,958 --> 01:33:54,917 No. But I want to know. 1108 01:33:56,917 --> 01:33:57,917 Well... 1109 01:33:58,042 --> 01:34:01,708 I find it very difficult to say goodbye to you. 1110 01:34:04,875 --> 01:34:06,083 I'll be all right. 1111 01:34:08,875 --> 01:34:10,417 - Well... - Well... 1112 01:34:13,667 --> 01:34:16,750 Will you call them so that they can close up? 1113 01:34:16,875 --> 01:34:18,792 Yes, I'll call them. 1114 01:36:07,125 --> 01:36:09,208 Everything is going to be all right. 1115 01:37:04,625 --> 01:37:10,958 To Jaime to Cristina 78705

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