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1
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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
1
00:00:01,283 --> 00:00:03,218
[♪]
2
00:00:06,655 --> 00:00:08,756
Ground Control, Jet Plate 1.
3
00:00:08,757 --> 00:00:10,558
The aircraft's
handling very well.
4
00:00:10,559 --> 00:00:11,993
Circular thrust is okay,
5
00:00:11,994 --> 00:00:13,595
but it's not up
to what I expected.
6
00:00:13,596 --> 00:00:15,630
The engineers
have to correct that.
7
00:00:15,631 --> 00:00:17,932
All right, we're going to try
the vertical descent now
8
00:00:17,933 --> 00:00:19,434
to check out
the landing position.
9
00:00:19,435 --> 00:00:22,370
Will confirm as soon
as we're airborne again.
10
00:00:22,371 --> 00:00:24,405
Jet Plate 1 over and out.
11
00:00:24,406 --> 00:00:28,075
The interior cabin weight
has increased by 109 pounds.
12
00:00:28,076 --> 00:00:29,810
I won...
I wonder what that means.
13
00:00:29,811 --> 00:00:32,052
Huh?
Let me check it out.
14
00:00:32,948 --> 00:00:35,216
[CRIES OUT]
15
00:00:35,217 --> 00:00:37,418
It means your scale is wrong,
Major Healey.
16
00:00:37,419 --> 00:00:39,787
I have never weighed
more than 107 pounds
17
00:00:39,788 --> 00:00:42,123
in my entire life.
18
00:00:42,124 --> 00:00:43,591
Jeannie,
what are you doing here?
19
00:00:43,592 --> 00:00:45,226
This is a top secret flight.
20
00:00:45,227 --> 00:00:47,795
I know, master, and you must
keep up your strength.
21
00:00:47,796 --> 00:00:48,929
I brought your lunch.
22
00:00:48,930 --> 00:00:49,964
[CHUCKLES]
23
00:00:49,965 --> 00:00:51,699
Would you please, Jeannie. Out.
24
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:53,501
It's peanut butter
and jelly sandwiches.
25
00:00:53,502 --> 00:00:55,870
Yeah, I don't care what it is.
This is really important.
26
00:00:55,871 --> 00:00:57,805
Now, you... Wait...
Wait... Wait a minute!
27
00:00:57,806 --> 00:00:59,073
What flavor jelly?
28
00:00:59,074 --> 00:01:01,576
Roger, stop that.
And you too, come on, get out.
29
00:01:01,577 --> 00:01:04,980
Go on.
Yeah.
30
00:01:04,981 --> 00:01:07,048
Boy. Oh, boy,
you were kind of tough on her.
31
00:01:07,049 --> 00:01:08,650
She was only thinking of us.
32
00:01:08,651 --> 00:01:11,285
Roger, when we get back to base
I will personally buy you
33
00:01:11,286 --> 00:01:13,121
a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich.
34
00:01:13,122 --> 00:01:14,923
What flavor jelly?
35
00:01:16,025 --> 00:01:17,305
Let's take her down, hm?
36
00:01:18,460 --> 00:01:19,945
Hey, wait a minute.
37
00:01:19,946 --> 00:01:22,346
This doesn't look like
our touchdown point.
38
00:01:22,465 --> 00:01:24,082
Huh?
39
00:01:24,083 --> 00:01:25,417
You're right.
40
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,518
Jeannie's weight must have
thrown us off course.
41
00:01:27,519 --> 00:01:29,187
Let me check that.
42
00:01:29,188 --> 00:01:31,323
All right, you take her down.
I'll handle this.
43
00:01:31,324 --> 00:01:32,790
Aye, aye, sir.
44
00:01:32,791 --> 00:01:34,292
Here we go.
All right.
45
00:01:34,293 --> 00:01:36,060
[WHIRRING]
46
00:01:43,702 --> 00:01:44,836
[CRUNCHING]
47
00:01:48,924 --> 00:01:49,924
Beautiful, Roge.
48
00:01:49,925 --> 00:01:51,660
She handles like a dream.
49
00:01:51,661 --> 00:01:54,029
Okay. Go.
50
00:01:54,030 --> 00:01:56,298
[♪]
51
00:02:07,910 --> 00:02:09,544
[GUNS COCKING]
52
00:02:10,997 --> 00:02:13,215
All right, you Martians,
up with your hands.
53
00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:15,066
[♪]
54
00:02:20,006 --> 00:02:21,939
[♪]
55
00:03:08,136 --> 00:03:10,070
[♪]
56
00:03:14,894 --> 00:03:16,277
Martians?
57
00:03:16,278 --> 00:03:18,279
Well, that's ridiculous.
We're not Martians.
58
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:19,447
Eh!
59
00:03:19,448 --> 00:03:21,249
Didn't expect you'd say you was,
60
00:03:21,250 --> 00:03:22,751
even if-in you are.
61
00:03:22,752 --> 00:03:25,620
Paw, they're funnier looking
than I thought they'd be.
62
00:03:26,355 --> 00:03:27,355
Martians?
63
00:03:27,356 --> 00:03:28,623
It's the flight suits, Roger.
64
00:03:28,624 --> 00:03:30,392
Take off the flight suits.
Here, unzip...
65
00:03:30,393 --> 00:03:32,994
I'm not taking my flight suit
off in front of that girl.
66
00:03:32,995 --> 00:03:35,580
[MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]
67
00:03:35,581 --> 00:03:37,082
ROGER:
Wait a minute.
68
00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:41,218
Hey, lookit, Paw,
they're shedding their skin.
69
00:03:41,219 --> 00:03:42,837
Well, I'll be.
70
00:03:42,838 --> 00:03:44,572
Sam hill.
71
00:03:48,294 --> 00:03:49,294
Um...
72
00:03:52,131 --> 00:03:53,481
Well, see?
73
00:03:53,482 --> 00:03:55,567
[GUN COCKS] Back, critters.
74
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,001
Unless you want
more holes in you
75
00:03:57,002 --> 00:03:58,737
than a gopher field.
76
00:03:58,738 --> 00:04:01,288
Oh, look, ma'am,
I-I think you made a mistake.
77
00:04:01,289 --> 00:04:05,259
Um, I'm Major Anthony Nelson
and this is Major Roger Healey.
78
00:04:05,260 --> 00:04:06,761
Eh, we're from Cocoa Beach.
79
00:04:07,496 --> 00:04:09,280
Uh, uh, NASA.
80
00:04:11,117 --> 00:04:12,867
Uh, we're astronauts.
81
00:04:12,868 --> 00:04:15,286
What's an asternort, Paw?
82
00:04:15,287 --> 00:04:16,520
I don't rightly know.
83
00:04:16,521 --> 00:04:18,656
I reckon some
special kind of Martian.
84
00:04:20,993 --> 00:04:22,877
This one's kind of cute, Paw.
85
00:04:22,878 --> 00:04:24,129
Can I keep him?
86
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,547
You get back here, girl.
87
00:04:26,548 --> 00:04:29,801
You wanna get yourself
corn-taminated?
88
00:04:29,802 --> 00:04:31,603
You don't think they're
gonna shoot us, do you?
89
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:32,971
No, of course not, Roger.
90
00:04:32,972 --> 00:04:34,606
They're just simple
country folk, Roger.
91
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:35,640
They're frightened.
92
00:04:35,641 --> 00:04:36,674
I'll talk to 'em
93
00:04:36,675 --> 00:04:39,177
in their own language.
Yeah. Good.
94
00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:40,745
Uh, now looky here, folks.
95
00:04:40,746 --> 00:04:43,064
There ain't nothing
to rightly be feared...
96
00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:44,566
How do you say "help"
in hillbilly?
97
00:04:44,567 --> 00:04:45,567
"Help."
98
00:04:45,568 --> 00:04:46,634
Help! Help!
Help! Help!
99
00:04:46,635 --> 00:04:48,486
Help! Help! Help!
Help! Help! Help!
100
00:04:48,487 --> 00:04:50,155
What are you gonna
do with them, Paw?
101
00:04:50,156 --> 00:04:52,824
Well, I don't rightly know,
Daisy Lou.
102
00:04:52,825 --> 00:04:55,794
First thing we gonna do
is move 'em over to the house.
103
00:04:55,795 --> 00:04:57,495
Okay, Martians, get moving.
104
00:04:57,496 --> 00:04:59,748
What...? What's the second thing
you're gonna do?
105
00:04:59,749 --> 00:05:02,350
Well, now, that's the part
I ain't decided on yet.
106
00:05:02,351 --> 00:05:05,219
I reckon we'll either
shoot you or hang you.
107
00:05:05,220 --> 00:05:07,589
Git! Git!
108
00:05:07,590 --> 00:05:09,691
[♪]
109
00:05:13,178 --> 00:05:14,763
[♪]
110
00:05:14,764 --> 00:05:15,797
Master.
111
00:05:17,299 --> 00:05:19,000
Major Healey.
112
00:05:21,504 --> 00:05:23,438
[SINGING IN FOREIGN DIALECT]
113
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:39,854
[SINGING IN FOREIGN DIALECT]
114
00:06:00,359 --> 00:06:04,229
Hello. Have you seen
two astronauts?
115
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:08,483
Aw, yep, uh... Paw's got 'em
back to the house.
116
00:06:08,484 --> 00:06:11,619
Oh, dear,
I hope they aren't having lunch.
117
00:06:11,620 --> 00:06:14,372
I don't reckon they are.
118
00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:16,207
Hey, are you, uh...?
119
00:06:17,409 --> 00:06:19,444
Are you an asternort too?
120
00:06:19,445 --> 00:06:20,745
[LAUGHS] Oh, no.
121
00:06:20,746 --> 00:06:22,630
I am a genie.
122
00:06:22,631 --> 00:06:24,899
Oh, I'm right pleased
to meet you, Miss Jeannie.
123
00:06:24,900 --> 00:06:26,751
My name's Clem.
124
00:06:26,752 --> 00:06:28,336
How do you do, Mr. Clem?
125
00:06:28,337 --> 00:06:29,853
You're purty.
126
00:06:34,393 --> 00:06:36,094
Quick too.
127
00:06:36,095 --> 00:06:38,796
I would like to see
the two astronauts, please.
128
00:06:40,165 --> 00:06:41,966
If'n I let you see 'em,
129
00:06:41,967 --> 00:06:44,235
then will you give me a kiss?
130
00:06:44,236 --> 00:06:46,487
No, Mr. Clem,
but I will give you
131
00:06:46,488 --> 00:06:48,528
a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich.
132
00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:53,027
Okay, okay, just put that thing
down, will you?
133
00:06:53,028 --> 00:06:54,228
PAW: Get in there.
134
00:06:54,229 --> 00:06:55,930
I don't want any nonsense
outta you two.
135
00:06:55,931 --> 00:06:57,365
You made your mind up yet, Paw?
136
00:06:57,366 --> 00:07:00,601
Yeah, are you
gonna hang 'em or shoot 'em?
137
00:07:00,602 --> 00:07:02,570
How many times do I tell you?
I'm not a Martian.
138
00:07:02,571 --> 00:07:04,971
I-I was brought up in a farm.
I know all about barns, I...
139
00:07:09,745 --> 00:07:10,845
Hang 'em!
140
00:07:11,464 --> 00:07:13,397
[♪]
141
00:07:16,602 --> 00:07:18,470
Why are you doing that,
Mr. Clem?
142
00:07:18,471 --> 00:07:20,772
You were going to take me
to see the two astronauts.
143
00:07:20,773 --> 00:07:23,074
Oh, well, I aim to,
uh, Miss Jeannie.
144
00:07:23,075 --> 00:07:24,308
I aim to, you see.
145
00:07:24,309 --> 00:07:27,178
But, um, us mountain folks
has, uh,
146
00:07:27,179 --> 00:07:29,547
our own special way
of doing things,
147
00:07:29,548 --> 00:07:31,816
and, uh, well,
it wouldn't be fitting
148
00:07:31,817 --> 00:07:33,885
for me to take you over
to see them fellas
149
00:07:33,886 --> 00:07:35,520
without I first showed you some
150
00:07:35,521 --> 00:07:37,922
old-fashioned
mountain hospitality.
151
00:07:37,923 --> 00:07:39,991
Is that what you
were doing with them?
152
00:07:39,992 --> 00:07:42,233
Oh, we sure are.
Heh, heh.
153
00:07:42,928 --> 00:07:45,129
Well, all right.
I...
154
00:07:45,130 --> 00:07:47,832
I do not wish to be impolite.
[PHONOGRAPH PLAYING BANJO MUSIC]
155
00:07:47,833 --> 00:07:50,969
But... But can you show me
this hospitality quickly?
156
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,136
Miss Jeannie,
157
00:07:52,137 --> 00:07:55,072
I aim to be quicker
than spit on the griddle.
158
00:07:55,073 --> 00:07:56,708
[CRIES OUT]
159
00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:59,043
Is this what you call
hospitality?
160
00:07:59,044 --> 00:08:00,512
Why, sure.
161
00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:03,114
How about a little old-fashioned
mountain-style bear hug?
162
00:08:03,115 --> 00:08:04,181
[SCREAMS]
163
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:06,400
[ROARS]
164
00:08:06,401 --> 00:08:09,237
Miss Jeannie! Miss Jeannie!
165
00:08:09,238 --> 00:08:12,206
Wait a minute.
Now, that's not what I meant.
166
00:08:12,207 --> 00:08:14,448
I meant something
entirely different.
167
00:08:19,114 --> 00:08:20,214
There.
168
00:08:20,215 --> 00:08:21,883
Reckon that ought to keep
you Martians
169
00:08:21,884 --> 00:08:23,868
from trying
any more funny stuff.
170
00:08:23,869 --> 00:08:25,319
What can we do to convince you
171
00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:26,538
we're not Martians?
172
00:08:26,539 --> 00:08:29,223
Could they be telling
the truth, Paw?
173
00:08:29,224 --> 00:08:30,525
Well, I reckon not,
174
00:08:30,526 --> 00:08:33,294
but there ain't no
real way of telling.
175
00:08:33,295 --> 00:08:35,463
Say, that gives me an idea.
176
00:08:35,464 --> 00:08:37,665
Do Martians have blood?
177
00:08:39,134 --> 00:08:40,334
Of course not, Maw.
178
00:08:40,335 --> 00:08:43,071
Everybody knows Martians
ain't got no blood.
179
00:08:43,072 --> 00:08:46,441
And if'n they do, it's green.
180
00:08:46,442 --> 00:08:48,610
Well, then, all we got to do
181
00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,511
is poke 'em a little with this,
182
00:08:50,512 --> 00:08:54,449
and if they bleed red,
they ain't Martian.
183
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:57,368
I'm a Martian, I'm a Martian.
Martian. Martian.
184
00:08:57,369 --> 00:09:01,071
There, you see, Paw? We got us
a corn-fession. Heh-heh.
185
00:09:01,072 --> 00:09:04,709
Now, all you got to do is decide
whether you wanna hang 'em, or...
186
00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:05,877
Or shoot 'em.
187
00:09:05,878 --> 00:09:08,245
Will you stop ogling him,
Daisy Lou?
188
00:09:08,246 --> 00:09:09,814
But he's cute, Maw.
189
00:09:09,815 --> 00:09:12,750
I'm gonna give you cute
right up alongside your head.
190
00:09:12,751 --> 00:09:15,553
We ain't having no mixed
marriages in our family.
191
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:19,740
I say we should shoot 'em
and be done with it.
192
00:09:19,741 --> 00:09:21,141
[♪]
193
00:09:23,429 --> 00:09:25,430
I reckon you're right, Maw.
194
00:09:25,431 --> 00:09:29,366
Oh, Paw, don't shoot 'em.
Can't we keep 'em as pets?
195
00:09:29,367 --> 00:09:31,603
I bet they'd pull
a real good plow.
196
00:09:31,604 --> 00:09:35,039
Daisy Lou, they is strangers.
197
00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:36,441
And strangers mean trouble.
198
00:09:36,442 --> 00:09:38,643
What if somebody
was to find out about 'em?
199
00:09:38,644 --> 00:09:39,844
They tell the government,
200
00:09:39,845 --> 00:09:41,529
the government
tell the revenuers,
201
00:09:41,530 --> 00:09:44,248
the revenuers come poking
around here and find our still.
202
00:09:44,249 --> 00:09:45,850
Your Paw's right, Daisy Lou.
203
00:09:45,851 --> 00:09:47,919
The only thing to do
is shoot 'em.
204
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,338
Uh, ma'am, could I speak
to you a moment, please?
205
00:09:50,339 --> 00:09:53,390
Uh, I-I think I have a solution.
206
00:09:53,391 --> 00:09:54,992
So have we.
207
00:09:54,993 --> 00:09:57,461
Uh, but I think I can convince
you that we're not Martians.
208
00:09:57,462 --> 00:09:58,896
Oh, you can?
Uh-huh.
209
00:09:58,897 --> 00:10:01,098
Now, if you'll just call
Cocoa Beach.
210
00:10:01,099 --> 00:10:03,067
You call NASA at Cocoa Beach.
211
00:10:03,068 --> 00:10:04,719
They'll be able
to explain who we are.
212
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:07,138
Can't do that, son.
And why not?
213
00:10:07,139 --> 00:10:09,157
'Cause we ain't got a telephone.
214
00:10:09,158 --> 00:10:10,458
[ALL LAUGH]
215
00:10:11,593 --> 00:10:13,260
[CHUCKLES] Oh, yeah.
216
00:10:13,261 --> 00:10:14,495
Ain't got a telephone.
217
00:10:14,496 --> 00:10:16,431
Somebody must have a telephone
around here.
218
00:10:16,432 --> 00:10:17,565
Isn't there a town nearby?
219
00:10:17,566 --> 00:10:20,467
We could go to Hankerville, Paw.
220
00:10:20,468 --> 00:10:21,669
Yeah, reckon we could.
221
00:10:21,670 --> 00:10:26,324
Say, um, uh, what's
this fellow, "NASA"?
222
00:10:26,325 --> 00:10:27,558
Oh, it's not a fella, sir.
223
00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,961
It's the National Aeronautics
and Space Agency.
224
00:10:29,962 --> 00:10:31,295
The who?
225
00:10:31,296 --> 00:10:33,665
Oh, um, the government.
226
00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:37,001
Paw, you're right. Revenuers!
227
00:10:37,002 --> 00:10:39,137
Wait, put the down the gun.
TONY: Forget it, Roge.
228
00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:40,804
Forget it?
They're gonna shoot us!
229
00:10:40,805 --> 00:10:43,007
No, no, they just probably
don't want the reward.
230
00:10:43,008 --> 00:10:44,625
Maw.
231
00:10:45,593 --> 00:10:48,262
Reward? What reward?
232
00:10:48,263 --> 00:10:51,215
Um, the United States government
would be very grateful
233
00:10:51,216 --> 00:10:52,683
if you captured two Martians.
234
00:10:52,684 --> 00:10:54,435
There would be a big reward.
Right?
235
00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:56,120
[♪]
236
00:10:56,922 --> 00:10:58,489
Let's go to Hankerville.
237
00:10:58,490 --> 00:11:00,741
We'll send Clem to Hankerville.
238
00:11:00,742 --> 00:11:02,977
Remember: NASA.
Uh, Cocoa Beach.
239
00:11:02,978 --> 00:11:05,345
Ask for Dr. Bellows!
240
00:11:05,346 --> 00:11:08,182
Oh, don't ask for Dr. Bellows.
Forget... Forget Dr. Bellows.
241
00:11:09,417 --> 00:11:11,669
I sure don't know how you
done this, Miss Jeannie,
242
00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:15,072
but I'd sure appreciate it
if'n you'd let me down.
243
00:11:15,073 --> 00:11:16,774
Well, I would be happy to,
Mr. Clem.
244
00:11:16,775 --> 00:11:19,210
But first you must promise
not to chase me anymore.
245
00:11:19,211 --> 00:11:20,811
Oh, I will. I do. I surely do.
246
00:11:20,812 --> 00:11:22,580
And then you must promise to
take me to see
247
00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:23,581
the two astronauts.
248
00:11:23,582 --> 00:11:24,682
I will, I will.
249
00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:26,384
Just as soon as you
let me down from here.
250
00:11:26,385 --> 00:11:27,665
Very well.
251
00:11:30,689 --> 00:11:32,623
[♪]
252
00:11:34,159 --> 00:11:35,759
[SHRIEKS]
253
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:37,861
Mr. Clem, you promised.
254
00:11:37,862 --> 00:11:40,898
I know I did, Miss Jeannie,
but I'm a terrible liar.
255
00:11:40,899 --> 00:11:43,234
Paw whups me for it
all the time.
256
00:11:43,235 --> 00:11:45,769
I just can't help it.
I just keep on lying.
257
00:11:45,770 --> 00:11:47,371
Ah-haw!
258
00:11:49,407 --> 00:11:50,441
What?
259
00:11:54,362 --> 00:11:56,831
Clem, you get down from there.
260
00:11:56,832 --> 00:12:00,351
Well,
I don't rightly know how, Maw.
261
00:12:00,352 --> 00:12:02,170
She done it to me.
262
00:12:02,171 --> 00:12:04,005
PAW:
I might have noticed.
263
00:12:04,006 --> 00:12:07,258
Another Martian, but female.
264
00:12:07,259 --> 00:12:10,144
I would like to see
the two astronauts, please.
265
00:12:10,145 --> 00:12:14,398
You watch out for her, Paw.
She's got powers.
266
00:12:14,399 --> 00:12:15,900
Uh, well, why...
Why surely, ma'am.
267
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:17,101
Uh, you just follow me.
268
00:12:17,102 --> 00:12:18,102
Oh. Um...
269
00:12:18,103 --> 00:12:20,270
Could you get him
down from there?
270
00:12:20,271 --> 00:12:22,631
'Cause he's gonna go
to Hankerville.
271
00:12:22,758 --> 00:12:23,974
JEANNIE:
Very well.
272
00:12:26,444 --> 00:12:28,379
[GIGGLES]
273
00:12:28,380 --> 00:12:29,880
You tell him what to do, Maw.
274
00:12:29,881 --> 00:12:32,149
Now, uh, ma'am,
them other two Martians
275
00:12:32,150 --> 00:12:34,218
is out in the barn,
so right this way.
276
00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:38,022
Hey, that was a great idea
about the reward.
277
00:12:38,023 --> 00:12:40,324
I wonder how far it is from here
to Hankerville?
278
00:12:40,325 --> 00:12:42,710
I don't know,
but here they come.
279
00:12:42,711 --> 00:12:43,711
[♪]
280
00:12:45,564 --> 00:12:48,382
Oh, master,
what have they done to you?
281
00:12:48,383 --> 00:12:50,768
Would you please just
blink us outta here.
282
00:12:50,769 --> 00:12:52,987
Oh, yes, master. At once.
283
00:12:58,343 --> 00:13:00,561
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
284
00:13:04,082 --> 00:13:09,019
Hey, that's real neat.
Sure saves us the trouble. Heh.
285
00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:11,605
Clem's on his way, Paw.
286
00:13:11,606 --> 00:13:15,526
Say, you done her
pretty good, Paw.
287
00:13:16,828 --> 00:13:18,162
I've been thinkin'.
288
00:13:18,163 --> 00:13:20,797
Them rewards you get
for capturing people.
289
00:13:20,798 --> 00:13:23,900
They say "dead or alive,"
don't they?
290
00:13:23,901 --> 00:13:26,770
They sure do.
Uh-huh.
291
00:13:26,771 --> 00:13:28,622
[♪]
292
00:13:35,179 --> 00:13:37,764
[♪]
293
00:13:37,765 --> 00:13:42,069
Yes. Yes, well,
thank you, colonel.
294
00:13:42,070 --> 00:13:44,238
Nothing yet on Major Nelson
and Major Healey, sir.
295
00:13:44,239 --> 00:13:45,473
They were supposed to land
296
00:13:45,474 --> 00:13:47,541
and then confirm once they
were airborne again.
297
00:13:47,542 --> 00:13:48,875
It's, uh, been three hours.
298
00:13:48,876 --> 00:13:51,645
Well, the radar lost them
as soon as they started down.
299
00:13:51,646 --> 00:13:54,215
They could be anywhere
within a radius of 200 miles.
300
00:13:54,216 --> 00:13:56,016
Well, according to...
[PHONE BUZZES]
301
00:13:56,017 --> 00:13:57,518
Oh, I'll get it.
302
00:13:58,553 --> 00:14:00,287
Dr. Bellows speaking.
303
00:14:00,288 --> 00:14:02,456
Uh, yes. Just a moment.
304
00:14:02,457 --> 00:14:03,457
For you, sir.
305
00:14:05,393 --> 00:14:06,994
General Peterson.
306
00:14:06,995 --> 00:14:08,629
Yes.
307
00:14:08,630 --> 00:14:10,264
Henderson, I haven't got time
308
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:12,233
to fool around any kind
of nonsense like that.
309
00:14:12,234 --> 00:14:14,868
I've an experimental ship
with two astronauts down, and...
310
00:14:16,238 --> 00:14:17,871
Yes.
311
00:14:17,872 --> 00:14:19,873
Yes, I know.
312
00:14:19,874 --> 00:14:22,709
All right.
I'll send somebody up there.
313
00:14:22,710 --> 00:14:25,529
Major Nelson, Major Healey?
Martians.
314
00:14:25,530 --> 00:14:26,781
I beg your pardon?
315
00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:28,816
All those blasted UFO sightings.
316
00:14:28,817 --> 00:14:30,618
Every time some darn fool
317
00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:33,371
sees a sunspot or a balloon,
they think we're being invaded.
318
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:34,805
[SNAPS FINGERS]
319
00:14:34,806 --> 00:14:37,708
Perhaps Jet Plate 1.
It looks like a flying saucer.
320
00:14:37,709 --> 00:14:39,743
That thought crossed my mind.
321
00:14:39,744 --> 00:14:41,078
However, this time the report
322
00:14:41,079 --> 00:14:42,979
says the Martians
have been captured.
323
00:14:42,980 --> 00:14:45,416
Three of 'em. One a female.
324
00:14:45,417 --> 00:14:48,135
Well, that crosses out
Major Nelson and Major Healey.
325
00:14:48,136 --> 00:14:49,387
Nevertheless, space headquarters
326
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:52,423
wants the invaders
questioned and investigated.
327
00:14:52,424 --> 00:14:55,125
Now, would you mind
hopping up there, Dr. Bellows?
328
00:14:55,126 --> 00:14:56,326
[♪]
329
00:14:56,327 --> 00:14:57,561
Yes, sir.
330
00:14:59,014 --> 00:15:02,649
Jeannie, would you wake up?
Would you please wake up?
331
00:15:02,650 --> 00:15:04,751
Oh!
Uh-oh.
332
00:15:04,752 --> 00:15:06,820
You woke up the wrong girl.
Shoot.
333
00:15:08,756 --> 00:15:10,024
Hi.
334
00:15:14,295 --> 00:15:19,266
Hey, Martian.
How come you don't cotton to me?
335
00:15:19,267 --> 00:15:22,436
I sure cotton to you.
336
00:15:22,437 --> 00:15:24,704
You hear that?
She cottons to me.
337
00:15:24,705 --> 00:15:26,006
What a time to be irresistible.
338
00:15:26,007 --> 00:15:27,508
Roger, control yourself,
will ya?
339
00:15:27,509 --> 00:15:28,808
Just control yourself.
340
00:15:28,809 --> 00:15:30,877
I know how unbearably
beautiful you find her,
341
00:15:30,878 --> 00:15:33,914
but remember, you're a Martian.
342
00:15:33,915 --> 00:15:36,383
She's...
She's an earthling.
343
00:15:36,384 --> 00:15:37,584
It won't work.
344
00:15:37,585 --> 00:15:38,885
What are you talking about?
345
00:15:38,886 --> 00:15:41,188
I know, I know, I know.
The heartbreak, the pain.
346
00:15:41,189 --> 00:15:43,390
The heartbreak and pain
is hanging from this hook...
347
00:15:43,391 --> 00:15:44,624
Roger!
348
00:15:44,625 --> 00:15:46,527
You see, miss, us Martians,
349
00:15:46,528 --> 00:15:49,396
we don't show our feelings
like most folks do.
350
00:15:49,397 --> 00:15:52,266
But Roger here, well,
he's just...
351
00:15:52,267 --> 00:15:55,202
He's just plumb crazy about you.
352
00:15:55,203 --> 00:15:56,537
Oh, he is?
353
00:15:56,538 --> 00:15:59,339
Sure he is.
Ain't you, Roge?
354
00:15:59,340 --> 00:16:00,507
Ain't you?
355
00:16:00,508 --> 00:16:02,443
Oh, yeah. Oh, me? Boy.
356
00:16:02,444 --> 00:16:05,279
Oh, I'm plumb crazy about you,
ma'am. Right. Oh, yeah.
357
00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:07,548
Here's what he'd really like
to be doing with you now:
358
00:16:07,549 --> 00:16:09,583
Is holding you in his arms
and crushing you
359
00:16:09,584 --> 00:16:11,085
and tell you
how beautiful you are.
360
00:16:11,086 --> 00:16:13,487
Yeah, I'd like to hold you
and crush you and beautiful...
361
00:16:13,488 --> 00:16:16,123
Yeah. The thing is, you
with that gun down there
362
00:16:16,124 --> 00:16:19,659
and us hanging up here,
well, c'est la vie.
363
00:16:19,660 --> 00:16:21,161
What's that mean?
364
00:16:21,162 --> 00:16:24,764
In Martian that means
he loves you.
365
00:16:24,765 --> 00:16:26,066
Yeah.
366
00:16:26,067 --> 00:16:30,937
Oh. Well, c'est la vie.
367
00:16:30,938 --> 00:16:33,173
C'est la vie.
368
00:16:33,174 --> 00:16:36,110
C'est la doggone vie.
Oh, yeah. Mmm. Oh!
369
00:16:38,363 --> 00:16:40,297
[MUFFLED MOANING]
370
00:16:41,666 --> 00:16:42,950
Wake up. Wake up.
371
00:16:42,951 --> 00:16:45,970
Would you just please
wake up, Jeannie.
372
00:16:45,971 --> 00:16:47,187
[GRUNTS]
373
00:16:47,188 --> 00:16:51,041
Jeannie, please wake up.
Please, come one. Come on, baby.
374
00:16:51,042 --> 00:16:53,577
Okay, put her down over here.
Over here.
375
00:16:54,746 --> 00:16:56,313
[GROANS]
376
00:16:56,314 --> 00:16:57,948
Water.
I think she's coming to.
377
00:16:57,949 --> 00:16:59,650
Water.
Jeannie, if you just wake up
378
00:16:59,651 --> 00:17:01,652
you could blink yourself
Lake Michigan.
379
00:17:01,653 --> 00:17:02,933
There's a bucket over here.
380
00:17:04,088 --> 00:17:05,656
Oh! It's got water in it.
381
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:11,094
Water.
There you go.
382
00:17:13,732 --> 00:17:15,900
[♪]
383
00:17:15,901 --> 00:17:17,400
[MOONSHINE BUBBLING]
384
00:17:19,404 --> 00:17:21,972
[WEEPING]
385
00:17:21,973 --> 00:17:26,777
He said he was plumb crazy
for me.
386
00:17:26,778 --> 00:17:29,947
He even said he
c'est la vied me.
387
00:17:29,948 --> 00:17:33,083
He didn't.
Yes, and then he...
388
00:17:33,084 --> 00:17:34,518
[SOBS]
389
00:17:34,519 --> 00:17:37,321
Aw, hush up, Daisy Lou.
Hush up, will ya?
390
00:17:37,322 --> 00:17:39,023
You reckon we gotta
revenge her, Maw?
391
00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:40,590
I reckon we do, Paw.
392
00:17:40,591 --> 00:17:43,827
If'n we don't, we can't hold up
our heads in polite society.
393
00:17:43,828 --> 00:17:45,729
Well, uh, how about the reward?
394
00:17:45,730 --> 00:17:47,831
Dead or alive, Paw.
395
00:17:47,832 --> 00:17:49,800
Dead or alive.
Uh-huh.
396
00:17:49,801 --> 00:17:51,268
Come on, gal.
397
00:17:51,269 --> 00:17:53,904
[♪]
398
00:17:53,905 --> 00:17:56,106
Come on, Jeannie, we gotta
get back to the jet plate.
399
00:17:56,107 --> 00:17:58,208
More.
Come on, that's enough.
400
00:17:58,209 --> 00:18:01,978
Ahem.
Ah, thank you, Master.
401
00:18:01,979 --> 00:18:03,480
[HICCUPS]
402
00:18:03,481 --> 00:18:04,715
Wait a minute.
403
00:18:04,716 --> 00:18:06,417
[SINGING INDISTINCTLY]
404
00:18:07,485 --> 00:18:09,720
[GASPS]
405
00:18:09,721 --> 00:18:11,021
That's moonshine.
406
00:18:11,022 --> 00:18:14,190
Great, just what we need:
A stoned genie.
407
00:18:14,191 --> 00:18:15,258
Jeannie.
408
00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:17,845
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING]
409
00:18:17,846 --> 00:18:19,713
[SINGING INDISTINCTLY]
410
00:18:21,983 --> 00:18:22,983
[HICCUPS]
411
00:18:22,984 --> 00:18:24,585
[GIGGLES]
412
00:18:24,586 --> 00:18:25,586
Oh!
413
00:18:26,721 --> 00:18:29,055
Jeannie.
Jeannie.
414
00:18:29,056 --> 00:18:30,177
Tag!
Agh!
415
00:18:31,125 --> 00:18:32,860
You are it, master.
Catch me, catch me.
416
00:18:32,861 --> 00:18:34,060
Oh, tag.
Yeah.
417
00:18:34,061 --> 00:18:35,941
All right, Jeannie.
Oh, ooh, oh!
418
00:18:38,633 --> 00:18:39,817
[GUN COCKS]
419
00:18:39,818 --> 00:18:41,067
Come on. Come on, Jeannie!
420
00:18:41,068 --> 00:18:42,102
Will you stop that?
421
00:18:42,103 --> 00:18:43,937
Do you happen to know
what this stuff is?
422
00:18:45,690 --> 00:18:49,592
Very good, master.
I am it. I will catch you.
423
00:18:49,593 --> 00:18:50,961
Good idea.
424
00:18:54,332 --> 00:18:55,332
[CRIES OUT]
425
00:18:59,437 --> 00:19:00,938
Roger!
426
00:19:00,939 --> 00:19:02,072
Roger.
427
00:19:02,073 --> 00:19:03,240
Come on.
428
00:19:04,125 --> 00:19:05,609
Olly, olly oxen free-free-free.
429
00:19:05,610 --> 00:19:07,311
Oh, that is not fair, master...
430
00:19:07,312 --> 00:19:08,545
[GUNSHOT]
[YELLS]
431
00:19:08,546 --> 00:19:10,514
[LAUGHING]
432
00:19:10,515 --> 00:19:13,350
Jeannie, just one blink
to the jet plate.
433
00:19:13,351 --> 00:19:15,051
[GUNSHOT]
[YELLS]
434
00:19:15,052 --> 00:19:16,820
Please, just one blink.
435
00:19:16,821 --> 00:19:18,087
[GUNSHOT]
[YELLS]
436
00:19:18,088 --> 00:19:19,856
Oh, now we're really up a tree.
437
00:19:19,857 --> 00:19:21,224
If that is your pleasure.
438
00:19:22,527 --> 00:19:23,577
[GIGGLES]
439
00:19:23,578 --> 00:19:24,812
How's this?
440
00:19:24,813 --> 00:19:25,934
Oh, great.
441
00:19:27,031 --> 00:19:28,932
Where'd they go?
442
00:19:28,933 --> 00:19:30,667
There they are.
443
00:19:32,337 --> 00:19:34,604
[GUNSHOT]
[YELLS]
444
00:19:34,605 --> 00:19:37,291
Now we're really sitting ducks.
Certainly.
445
00:19:37,292 --> 00:19:40,026
[QUACKING]
446
00:19:41,379 --> 00:19:45,749
Roge, you've got
feathers and wings.
447
00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:46,850
So have you.
448
00:19:46,851 --> 00:19:48,419
You wanna fly south
for the winter?
449
00:19:48,420 --> 00:19:49,620
[GIGGLES]
450
00:19:50,438 --> 00:19:51,722
[YELLING]
451
00:19:51,723 --> 00:19:53,857
[GIGGLING]
452
00:19:53,858 --> 00:19:56,777
Darndest thing I ever seen.
453
00:19:56,778 --> 00:19:58,412
Ah, what'd you expect, Paw?
454
00:19:58,413 --> 00:20:02,616
It's just your average,
everyday Martian.
455
00:20:02,617 --> 00:20:05,402
Jeannie, blink us
to the jet plate right now.
456
00:20:05,403 --> 00:20:08,972
The jet plate, the ship,
the airplane, the round thing.
457
00:20:08,973 --> 00:20:11,375
Well, certainly.
Why did you not say so before?
458
00:20:11,376 --> 00:20:13,210
I did say so before.
459
00:20:14,629 --> 00:20:15,712
Ah!
460
00:20:15,713 --> 00:20:17,381
We're here. We're safe.
461
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:18,982
Well, thank you, Jeannie,
thank you.
462
00:20:18,983 --> 00:20:21,685
Oh, I've never been so happy
to be anyplace in my whole life.
463
00:20:21,686 --> 00:20:24,220
All right. Let's get outta
this nightmare. Come on.
464
00:20:24,221 --> 00:20:26,741
[GIGGLING] Are we not
gonna play tag anymore?
465
00:20:29,894 --> 00:20:32,729
Oh, what have you done now?!
Jeannie, are you all right?
466
00:20:32,730 --> 00:20:34,097
Let me check that.
467
00:20:34,098 --> 00:20:36,165
It's all right, Roger,
it's just the capacitor.
468
00:20:36,166 --> 00:20:37,651
It'll take a minute to fix.
469
00:20:37,652 --> 00:20:39,336
For the last time,
470
00:20:39,337 --> 00:20:42,539
that is not a flying saucer.
It's a jet plate.
471
00:20:42,540 --> 00:20:44,541
An experimental aircraft
472
00:20:44,542 --> 00:20:47,278
constructed by
the United States Air Force.
473
00:20:47,279 --> 00:20:50,681
BELLOWS: Please, please, will
you take me to the astronauts.
474
00:20:50,682 --> 00:20:52,148
It's Dr. Bellows, all right.
475
00:20:52,149 --> 00:20:54,084
Oh, Jeannie, come on.
We need you. Wake up.
476
00:20:54,085 --> 00:20:55,786
She must be out
for the duration.
477
00:20:55,787 --> 00:20:57,387
Dr. Bellows must be worried
about us.
478
00:20:57,388 --> 00:20:58,956
We'll go out
and show him we're okay,
479
00:20:58,957 --> 00:21:00,356
and then try to keep
those people
480
00:21:00,357 --> 00:21:01,592
from thinking we're Martians.
481
00:21:05,329 --> 00:21:08,732
You are Martians. Yes, master.
482
00:21:08,733 --> 00:21:11,518
[MAGIC BOINGS]
483
00:21:11,519 --> 00:21:14,271
If they ain't Martians,
do we still get a reward?
484
00:21:14,272 --> 00:21:16,940
If'n they ain't Martians, Paw,
can I marry the cute one?
485
00:21:16,941 --> 00:21:20,561
You'll wait till you're 14
like your sister done.
486
00:21:20,562 --> 00:21:22,730
Please, please,
just take me to them.
487
00:21:22,731 --> 00:21:24,948
Not till you give us the reward.
488
00:21:24,949 --> 00:21:28,619
My dear sir,
I appreciate you informing NASA
489
00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:30,220
of the whereabouts
of the jet plate,
490
00:21:30,221 --> 00:21:32,456
but it seems to me that any
public-spirited citizen
491
00:21:32,457 --> 00:21:33,824
should be only too willing...
492
00:21:34,725 --> 00:21:35,992
[GASPS]
493
00:21:35,993 --> 00:21:37,994
Great heavens.
494
00:21:37,995 --> 00:21:39,329
Martians.
495
00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:43,816
I've gotta get back to...
I've got to...
496
00:21:43,817 --> 00:21:45,752
NASA Invaded.
497
00:21:45,753 --> 00:21:47,354
Hey, wait.
498
00:21:47,355 --> 00:21:49,523
Wait a minute.
Hey, mister.
499
00:21:49,524 --> 00:21:51,391
Hey. Hey, mister.
500
00:21:51,392 --> 00:21:52,392
Wait a minute.
501
00:21:52,393 --> 00:21:53,993
These here
are not the same ones.
502
00:21:53,994 --> 00:21:55,429
No, they's different.
503
00:21:55,430 --> 00:21:56,830
[GUNSHOTS] Hey, wait a minute.
504
00:21:56,831 --> 00:21:59,365
You can't shoot at Dr. Bellows.
He's a psychiatrist.
505
00:21:59,366 --> 00:22:00,667
[LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]
506
00:22:03,938 --> 00:22:05,271
He's right. We're Martians.
507
00:22:11,028 --> 00:22:14,231
Here, here. Get 'em, get 'em.
508
00:22:14,232 --> 00:22:16,166
[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
509
00:22:20,704 --> 00:22:22,723
[♪]
510
00:22:25,994 --> 00:22:28,128
General, I don't understand.
511
00:22:28,129 --> 00:22:30,564
This whole base
should be on red alert.
512
00:22:30,565 --> 00:22:32,599
The president
should have been notified.
513
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:33,967
Look. Look at this hat.
514
00:22:33,968 --> 00:22:36,269
Now just calm down, colonel.
Nobody's gonna hurt you.
515
00:22:36,270 --> 00:22:37,838
But, sir,
I know it sounds crazy,
516
00:22:37,839 --> 00:22:39,039
but it's true: I saw them.
517
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:40,907
Green... Green men with, uh:
518
00:22:40,908 --> 00:22:42,109
[STAMMERS]
519
00:22:42,110 --> 00:22:43,409
Antennae, colonel?
520
00:22:43,410 --> 00:22:44,678
That's right, sir, antennae.
521
00:22:44,679 --> 00:22:46,747
They must have taken over
the jet plate.
522
00:22:46,748 --> 00:22:48,949
Well, there's the jet plate
right now, doctor.
523
00:22:48,950 --> 00:22:52,653
BELLOWS: The gall of them,
to come right here to NASA.
524
00:22:52,654 --> 00:22:54,470
[JET PLATE ENGINES WHIRRING]
525
00:22:56,541 --> 00:22:59,776
Oh, no.
They might have vaporizers.
526
00:22:59,777 --> 00:23:01,845
We'll chance it, doctor. Go on!
527
00:23:01,846 --> 00:23:03,079
You'll see.
528
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:04,564
You'll see.
529
00:23:07,151 --> 00:23:08,151
Hello.
530
00:23:08,953 --> 00:23:10,353
Hello in...
531
00:23:10,354 --> 00:23:12,522
Hello in there.
532
00:23:12,523 --> 00:23:16,760
[SPEAKING SLOWLY]
Uh, we are earthlings.
533
00:23:16,761 --> 00:23:18,846
We like you.
534
00:23:18,847 --> 00:23:21,998
Oh, that's very kind of you,
sir. We like you too.
535
00:23:27,489 --> 00:23:29,356
Well, doctor?
536
00:23:29,357 --> 00:23:33,193
[SPEAKING NORMALLY] Well, I... I
tell you, sir, I saw Martians.
537
00:23:33,194 --> 00:23:37,781
They were green with these
long antennae. I saw them.
538
00:23:37,782 --> 00:23:39,682
[♪]
539
00:23:48,993 --> 00:23:50,928
[♪]
37425
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