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1
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Kids, by the spring of 2013...
2
00:00:04,137 --> 00:00:05,698
Lily and Marshall had life figured out.
3
00:00:05,772 --> 00:00:09,572
Lily was making a name
as the art consultant for The Captain.
4
00:00:09,642 --> 00:00:12,338
Marshall was a superstar
environmental lawyer...
5
00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:15,870
and home life was a well-oiled machine.
6
00:00:15,949 --> 00:00:18,577
And then something changed.
7
00:00:19,719 --> 00:00:21,380
Captain, you wanted to see me?
8
00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:23,445
Captain, hello?
9
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:26,014
Permission to come aboard.
10
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:27,582
Granted.
11
00:00:28,528 --> 00:00:30,723
Lily, small order of business.
12
00:00:30,797 --> 00:00:34,096
I'm moving to Rome, and
I'd like you to come with me. Carry on.
13
00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:35,964
What?
14
00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:39,631
That's amazing, but I-I don't know
if I can just uproot my life.
15
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,640
It's only for a year. Carry on.
16
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:44,108
But I'm married, and we have a baby...
17
00:00:44,177 --> 00:00:47,305
and they just opened a Shake Shack
on our block, and there's never a line.
18
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:48,870
I understand it's a big decision.
19
00:00:48,948 --> 00:00:52,406
Take all the time you need.
Just let me know by the end of the day.
20
00:00:52,485 --> 00:00:55,386
Also, I need your advice
on purchasing some luggage.
21
00:00:55,455 --> 00:00:57,116
- What kind?
- Carry-on.
22
00:01:11,137 --> 00:01:12,934
Well, this has been fun. I should go.
23
00:01:13,006 --> 00:01:14,769
But you... you literally just got here.
24
00:01:14,841 --> 00:01:17,742
I didn't "literally" just get here.
I hate when people misuse that word.
25
00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:20,507
So do I, but you literally just got here.
26
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,109
Hi, Ted.
27
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:25,242
Well, this has been fun. I should go.
28
00:01:25,318 --> 00:01:27,650
Okay, fine. Now I'm leaving.
29
00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:29,483
I mean, why do people go to a bar anyway?
30
00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:32,116
To get your drink on
and some girl's pants off.
31
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:33,682
I can do both at home.
32
00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:35,917
What are you looking at?
33
00:01:35,995 --> 00:01:38,429
What? The girl in the big coat?
34
00:01:38,498 --> 00:01:40,864
We were in the same yoga class together.
35
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:42,424
You know how sometimes
you'll meet a girl...
36
00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:45,027
and there'll be that one
bewitching little detail...
37
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:47,573
that'll make you just
fall in love with her instantly?
38
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,403
You know, a-a little
freckle on the nose...
39
00:01:49,476 --> 00:01:51,034
the... the lilt of her laugh...
40
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:53,204
the way she pronounces
a certain word or phrase.
41
00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:54,974
Sure, totally.
42
00:01:55,048 --> 00:01:58,609
Well, in this girl's case,
the bewitching little detail...
43
00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:02,712
is the fact that she has
just a ridonkulous body.
44
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,155
- "Ridonkulous"?
- Ridonkulous.
45
00:02:05,225 --> 00:02:07,785
I've only heard you use
"ridonkulous" to describe...
46
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:09,624
Impossible - Ghost Protocol.
47
00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:12,995
Barney, this girl has...
48
00:02:13,066 --> 00:02:16,126
Impossible...
Ghost Protocol of bodies.
49
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,999
Whoa.
50
00:02:18,071 --> 00:02:19,868
Just wait till she takes that coat off.
51
00:02:19,939 --> 00:02:21,429
Oh, wait. Sorry.
52
00:02:21,508 --> 00:02:23,066
You were... You were just
about to leave. Right?
53
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,373
Well, I've already paid for this drink.
54
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:29,575
Guys, The Captain
just made me a very interesting offer.
55
00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,947
Finally, we get around
to the real reason he hired you.
56
00:02:32,018 --> 00:02:34,248
Just promise you film it,
and please use a tripod.
57
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,810
There's nothing artistic about shaky-cam.
58
00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,379
It just looks sloppy.
59
00:02:37,457 --> 00:02:39,755
He wants me to move to Rome for a year...
60
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,316
to buy art for him.
61
00:02:41,394 --> 00:02:43,624
- Whoa. Seriously?
- Is that something you want to do?
62
00:02:43,696 --> 00:02:46,597
Are you kidding?
I've always wanted to live abroad.
63
00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:50,158
My summer in Paris back in college
was so enlightening...
64
00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:54,730
the art, the history, the free cheese
just for wearing a low-cut top.
65
00:02:54,807 --> 00:02:56,775
Well, how does Marshall feel about moving?
66
00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,367
I haven't told him yet.
67
00:02:58,444 --> 00:03:00,105
He really loves his job here.
68
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,307
Yeah, but he also loves Italy.
69
00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:04,509
He took a week of Italian in college...
70
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,074
and the only reason he dropped it...
71
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:08,882
was 'cause he had a conflict
with being not stoned.
72
00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:11,947
But he still knows
how to say the phrase...
73
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,858
"Come on, bro.
Don't bogart all the Funions."
74
00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:17,294
All right. I'm gonna call him.
75
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:22,330
- Hey, baby.
- Hey, baby. I can't talk right now.
76
00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:23,994
I'm working on a big case. Bye.
77
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:25,560
And that's when Lily realized...
78
00:03:25,638 --> 00:03:27,697
what moving to Rome would really mean.
79
00:03:55,635 --> 00:03:57,227
And before you know it...
80
00:03:57,303 --> 00:04:00,500
His life turns into an angsty, existential,
black-and-white Italian movie?
81
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:02,063
Exactly.
82
00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:18,313
I used to be a lawyer.
83
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:23,955
I don't know anymore.
84
00:04:37,910 --> 00:04:39,830
I'm sorry. I gotta hit pause for a second.
85
00:04:39,879 --> 00:04:41,847
Why is it so hot in here?
86
00:04:41,914 --> 00:04:44,178
Oh. Right. While you
were blabbering on and on...
87
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:45,740
about your whole life
crisis, or whatever...
88
00:04:45,818 --> 00:04:48,048
I slipped Carl a hundred
to turn the heat up in here.
89
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:52,558
- What? Why?
- Because she is still in the big, puffy coat!
90
00:04:53,526 --> 00:04:55,016
Barney, what are you doing?
91
00:04:55,094 --> 00:04:57,085
I'm trying to get her out of that coat.
92
00:04:57,163 --> 00:04:58,653
I'm fighting hotness with hotness.
93
00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:00,358
You're engaged.
94
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:02,526
Okay. Lily, clearly,
you're forgetting something.
95
00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:04,832
Yes, I'm engaged
to the coolest girl on Earth.
96
00:05:04,904 --> 00:05:07,532
This is about looking, not touching.
97
00:05:07,607 --> 00:05:09,598
Robin understands
there is one set of balls...
98
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:11,200
she can't tie up with a necktie...
99
00:05:11,277 --> 00:05:13,268
and lightly hit with a ping pong paddle...
100
00:05:13,346 --> 00:05:14,836
these balls.
101
00:05:14,914 --> 00:05:18,816
Okay. I'm gonna call The Captain
and get this over with.
102
00:05:20,219 --> 00:05:22,983
- Ahoy.
- Hello, Captain?
103
00:05:23,056 --> 00:05:27,152
Lily. I hope you're not calling
to harpoon our big move to Rome.
104
00:05:27,226 --> 00:05:31,162
Thank you, but I can't
ask my husband to abandon his career.
105
00:05:31,230 --> 00:05:34,666
Would you like me to try and convince him?
I'm very persuasive.
106
00:05:34,734 --> 00:05:36,725
I'm sorry. The ship has sailed.
107
00:05:36,803 --> 00:05:38,430
What's that mean?
108
00:05:38,504 --> 00:05:40,972
Well, you know. The ship has sailed.
109
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,600
That it's over,
and there's nothing you can do.
110
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:46,440
What a peculiar expression.
111
00:05:46,512 --> 00:05:48,070
Well, thanks for all your hard work, Lily.
112
00:05:48,147 --> 00:05:49,748
I've never been good at good-byes, so...
113
00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:52,740
Well, that's that.
114
00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:54,844
My dream job as an art consultant is over.
115
00:05:54,921 --> 00:05:56,411
The sad part...
116
00:05:56,489 --> 00:05:57,979
I gotta stop you right there, Lily...
117
00:05:58,057 --> 00:06:01,356
'cause, unless I'm mistaken,
lock and load, gentlemen.
118
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:06,798
A scarf? No, don't put on, take off!
119
00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:10,302
Okay, you're starting to drool.
I'm calling creepy.
120
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:13,271
Lily, it's fine. This is purely academic.
121
00:06:13,339 --> 00:06:15,432
It's... It's like bird watching.
122
00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:19,308
And right now, I am watching
a double-breasted... Robin.
123
00:06:21,514 --> 00:06:23,004
Wait. They know each other?
124
00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:24,777
Whoa. Wait. What... What is going on here?
125
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,716
Oh, my God. It's happening.
126
00:06:26,786 --> 00:06:28,276
This is just like I imagined.
127
00:06:28,354 --> 00:06:30,652
Right in front of Ted
so I can rub it in his face.
128
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,213
The belt is mine!
129
00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:35,385
Hey, guys.
Barney, you remember Liddy.
130
00:06:35,461 --> 00:06:39,397
I do. Yes. Libby.
131
00:06:39,465 --> 00:06:41,228
Liddy. We met when Robin hired me.
132
00:06:41,300 --> 00:06:43,234
Robin hired you. Naughty girl.
133
00:06:43,302 --> 00:06:44,826
Okay. Okay.
134
00:06:44,904 --> 00:06:46,394
So how's this gonna go down?
135
00:06:46,472 --> 00:06:48,152
You two just gonna start,
and I'll jump in?
136
00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:51,842
Uh, she's our wedding planner.
137
00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:54,607
Of course, she's the wedding planner!
138
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,477
Good to see you again, Libby.
139
00:06:56,549 --> 00:06:58,016
- Liddy.
- Yeah.
140
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:01,485
Hey, I'm Ted.
We, uh, we met once before.
141
00:07:01,554 --> 00:07:03,647
Oh, right, in yoga class. How are you?
142
00:07:03,723 --> 00:07:06,283
She's talking to me.
143
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:10,489
Well, I would love to stay,
but now that I'm unemployed...
144
00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,758
I think I'll go surprise Marshall at work.
145
00:07:14,801 --> 00:07:16,462
Wedding planner.
146
00:07:17,837 --> 00:07:19,737
So Lily went to visit Marshall at work...
147
00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:22,366
hoping she wasn't interrupting
anything important.
148
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,069
She wasn't.
149
00:07:24,143 --> 00:07:26,634
Oh. What is going on?
150
00:07:26,712 --> 00:07:29,977
Bernard, if we just glue
the cards together, it's...
151
00:07:30,049 --> 00:07:32,540
Lily. What are you doing here?
152
00:07:32,618 --> 00:07:34,108
Well, I baked you brownies...
153
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:36,028
because I thought you
were busy working, but...
154
00:07:36,088 --> 00:07:37,783
So when you said...
155
00:07:37,857 --> 00:07:39,688
Lily, hey, I can't really talk.
156
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:41,386
I'm working
on a big project right now.
157
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,951
It's a real house of cards.
158
00:07:43,029 --> 00:07:45,657
Is this the house of cards
you were talking about?
159
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:49,158
I thought you had some big client.
160
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:52,762
Oh, sweetheart,
we haven't had a client here in months.
161
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:55,672
Ooh, brownies. Hey.
162
00:08:01,247 --> 00:08:04,648
What is going on? What do you mean
you haven't had a client in months?
163
00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:08,244
Ever since the Gruber case,
we lost a lot of business.
164
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:09,913
People got laid off.
165
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,479
It's just me and Bernard now.
166
00:08:11,557 --> 00:08:15,049
- Where's Cootes?
- He's holed up in a bomb shelter in Colorado...
167
00:08:15,127 --> 00:08:17,755
waiting for the apocalypse
and tending to his herb garden.
168
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:21,197
So all those times I've called you
in the past few months...
169
00:08:21,267 --> 00:08:25,670
when you talked about how "busy" you were,
you were just lying to me?
170
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:27,763
Technically, I never lied.
171
00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:32,668
- Hey, baby.
- Hey, baby. I can't talk right now.
172
00:08:32,745 --> 00:08:35,009
I'm working on a big case. Bye.
173
00:08:38,951 --> 00:08:41,715
It is a big case.
174
00:08:41,787 --> 00:08:43,277
Bad time, Lily.
175
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,916
I gotta focus on the client.
Gotta go. Bye.
176
00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:47,721
Where were we?
177
00:08:47,793 --> 00:08:49,784
Chapter 19.
178
00:08:49,862 --> 00:08:52,592
I can't talk right now.
I got a lot on my plate.
179
00:08:53,666 --> 00:08:55,156
Well, let's dig in.
180
00:08:55,234 --> 00:08:57,327
If we start now, we can be done by lunch.
181
00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:00,432
Now's not a good time, Lil.
182
00:09:00,506 --> 00:09:03,270
We got a lot of balls
in the air right now.
183
00:09:03,342 --> 00:09:06,505
Okay, toss me the stapler.
184
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,105
Unbelievable.
185
00:09:09,181 --> 00:09:10,671
Wait.
186
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,581
When you said you were
about to get reamed...
187
00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:14,847
Oh. Right. That.
188
00:09:14,921 --> 00:09:18,118
No, sometimes for fun,
we throw reams of paper at each other.
189
00:09:18,190 --> 00:09:21,216
Bernard!
Not a good time!
190
00:09:21,294 --> 00:09:23,762
Read the room.
191
00:09:23,829 --> 00:09:25,524
I'm sorry, baby.
192
00:09:25,598 --> 00:09:28,089
I... I didn't want you to see me fail.
193
00:09:28,167 --> 00:09:31,967
Damn it. Do your realize
what you cost us by lying to me?
194
00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:33,630
The Captain is moving to Rome...
195
00:09:33,706 --> 00:09:36,732
and he offered to bring me along
as his art consultant...
196
00:09:36,809 --> 00:09:39,300
but I turned him down
because I thought you loved your job.
197
00:09:39,378 --> 00:09:41,243
Oh, my gosh.
198
00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:44,215
If we lived in Italy,
I could just spend my days...
199
00:09:44,283 --> 00:09:47,047
taking care of Marvin,
and trying to make pasta...
200
00:09:47,119 --> 00:09:49,246
and watching Italian Price Is Right.
201
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:51,813
- It sounds like a dream.
- Well, it's too late.
202
00:09:51,891 --> 00:09:55,292
No. No, Lily. I'm going
to The Captain's right now.
203
00:09:55,361 --> 00:09:57,386
I'm gonna make this right.
I'm gonna get you that job.
204
00:09:57,463 --> 00:09:59,863
- No, Marshall.
- You're getting that job.
205
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:01,991
You can just make it out to Liddy Gates.
206
00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:03,933
That's L-I-D-D-Y.
207
00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:08,963
L-I-two Ds... double "D"...two Ds, Y.
208
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:12,067
Well, here is the final menu,
as we discussed.
209
00:10:12,144 --> 00:10:13,634
But let me be clear, you're the boss.
210
00:10:13,713 --> 00:10:15,203
I'm here to serve you.
211
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:17,122
So if there's anything
you want me to remove...
212
00:10:17,149 --> 00:10:18,878
just tell me to remove it and it's gone.
213
00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:20,714
I'll remove anything you want.
214
00:10:25,224 --> 00:10:27,192
I'm serious. I won't be offended.
215
00:10:27,259 --> 00:10:29,159
You want it gone, I'll take it right off.
216
00:10:29,228 --> 00:10:31,560
- Is it hot in here?
- It's not cold.
217
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:33,326
It's hot. It's sticky hot.
218
00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:36,368
It's like Bikram, right?
We're yoga buddies.
219
00:10:37,203 --> 00:10:39,933
♪ Yoga buddies ♪
220
00:10:40,006 --> 00:10:42,873
Well, I'll let you guys read the menu.
221
00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:44,807
- Can you point me to the...
- Coat rack?
222
00:10:44,877 --> 00:10:46,572
- Restroom?
- Uh, it's right over there.
223
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,979
- Okay.
- But it's hard to pee in a giant coat.
224
00:10:51,283 --> 00:10:52,773
Okay. What's going on?
225
00:10:52,852 --> 00:10:54,581
Why are you guys being so weird?
226
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:58,090
Ted says that Liddy has
a ridonkulous body.
227
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:00,682
But there's no way of verifying
because she won't take off the coat!
228
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:02,250
Is that why it's so hot in here?
229
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,523
Did you pay Carl
to turn up the heat again?
230
00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:07,191
Well, yes.
231
00:11:07,266 --> 00:11:09,131
But I was curious.
232
00:11:09,201 --> 00:11:10,691
I wanna get that coat on the rack...
233
00:11:10,770 --> 00:11:13,568
- so I can see the rack that's under the coat.
- My God.
234
00:11:15,641 --> 00:11:18,439
I have been wondering the same thing.
235
00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,274
I mean, she never takes that coat off.
236
00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:23,782
Whatever she's smuggling under there
has to be thermonuclear.
237
00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:25,749
Bet she has WBDs.
238
00:11:25,818 --> 00:11:28,013
Weapons of Bra Destruction.
239
00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:30,016
Thank you.
240
00:11:30,089 --> 00:11:33,889
This... This is why you're the
coolest fiancé ever.
241
00:11:36,929 --> 00:11:39,591
So, Ted, when you say "ridonkulous"?
242
00:11:39,665 --> 00:11:41,462
I can't even describe it.
243
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:44,970
It'd be like trying to explain
a rainbow to a blind person.
244
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:47,870
Well, is she single?
Why don't you ask her out?
245
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:51,341
Actually, I almost did
the first time we met...
246
00:11:51,410 --> 00:11:54,243
before she took off that coat.
247
00:11:54,313 --> 00:11:57,510
Sand storm, Dubai, that hoodie.
248
00:11:57,583 --> 00:11:59,141
I mean, it's ridonkulous.
249
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:01,209
Oh, I know. I so wanna see it again.
250
00:12:01,287 --> 00:12:03,887
Well, hey, I mean, maybe
after this, if you're not doing anything.
251
00:12:03,956 --> 00:12:06,516
Totally, and maybe later
we could get a bite to eat.
252
00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:09,254
There's this great place
that's super close.
253
00:12:10,996 --> 00:12:13,226
No, I... Yeah, I... No.
254
00:12:13,299 --> 00:12:15,733
It was just too much.
255
00:12:15,801 --> 00:12:18,269
Indiana Jones wouldn't look at this body.
256
00:12:18,337 --> 00:12:21,465
This is a body that would
melt a Nazi's face.
257
00:12:21,540 --> 00:12:26,000
Aw, man. I want my face to melt.
258
00:12:26,078 --> 00:12:27,841
It's too bad Marshall isn't here.
259
00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,245
- Why Marshall?
- 'Cause he could just say...
260
00:12:30,316 --> 00:12:32,546
Hey, Liddy.
Why don't you take off that coat?
261
00:12:32,618 --> 00:12:34,108
And Liddy would be all...
262
00:12:34,186 --> 00:12:35,706
Sure. Should I take my shirt off, too?
263
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,916
No, that's probably enough.
264
00:12:37,990 --> 00:12:39,480
And he'd get away with it.
265
00:12:39,558 --> 00:12:41,253
You know why? No stink.
266
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,921
You obviously haven't
split a cab with him after basketball.
267
00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,789
I don't mean physical stink.
268
00:12:46,866 --> 00:12:48,993
I mean the pheromonal stink
a guy gives off...
269
00:12:49,068 --> 00:12:51,935
when he's desperate for action
to a pathetic degree.
270
00:12:52,004 --> 00:12:53,494
You know, like Ted.
271
00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:56,632
- I have stink?
- Bro, you dipped in stink.
272
00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:58,438
If Liddy came back to the table,
and you said...
273
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:01,139
Uh, Liddy, why don't you,
uh, take off that coat?
274
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:02,703
You want me to take my coat off?
275
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,443
How about instead I take off your face?
276
00:13:05,217 --> 00:13:06,707
Ow!
277
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,653
Really?
You had to have her beat me up?
278
00:13:09,722 --> 00:13:11,212
She's not done Ted.
279
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:16,284
Ghost Protocol wasn't that good!
280
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:19,160
Marshall, on the other hand,
girls take one look...
281
00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:22,632
and just know, "There's
a guy who's met the girl of his dreams...
282
00:13:22,701 --> 00:13:26,933
and wants to spend the rest of his life
with her and only her."
283
00:13:27,006 --> 00:13:29,133
- So why don't you ask her?
- Pardon me?
284
00:13:29,208 --> 00:13:32,541
Aren't you a guy who's met
the girl of his dreams...
285
00:13:32,611 --> 00:13:36,012
and wants to spend the rest of his life
with her and only her?
286
00:13:36,081 --> 00:13:38,811
Of course, baby.
287
00:13:38,884 --> 00:13:41,250
So why don't you ask her
to take her coat off?
288
00:13:44,290 --> 00:13:46,121
Um...
289
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:51,657
And you never even saw Ghost Protocol.
290
00:13:52,932 --> 00:13:55,423
So, big day is coming up.
How are you guys feeling?
291
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:58,937
I talked to the caterer, and the mini
lamb shanks are gonna be amazing.
292
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:01,564
Oh, by the way, I talked to the florist,
and the violets...
293
00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:03,130
Okay, Barney. You can do this.
294
00:14:03,209 --> 00:14:04,938
Just say it. Say it.
295
00:14:05,010 --> 00:14:08,070
Say it.
296
00:14:08,147 --> 00:14:10,707
Hey, Liddy. Do you wanna
take off your coat?
297
00:14:15,988 --> 00:14:17,546
Sure.
298
00:14:17,623 --> 00:14:20,148
I did it.
I proved to myself and everyone else...
299
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,456
that I have no desire
to be with any other woman.
300
00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:26,487
I am completely immune to every other...
301
00:14:26,565 --> 00:14:28,123
Holy crap!
302
00:14:32,338 --> 00:14:34,431
And it was indeed ridonkulous.
303
00:14:34,506 --> 00:14:36,371
And we got to see it.
304
00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:38,569
All thanks to this lovely lady right here.
305
00:14:38,644 --> 00:14:41,807
Robin, thanks to you,
I can now walk up to any girl...
306
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,008
and say whatever creepy,
disgusting thing I want...
307
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:45,573
and totally get away with it.
308
00:14:45,651 --> 00:14:48,415
- Hmm.
- I think I'm gonna like being married.
309
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:52,552
Hello?
310
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:55,287
- Ahoy.
- Ahoy, Lily.
311
00:14:55,361 --> 00:14:57,226
I just had a long talk with your husband.
312
00:14:57,296 --> 00:15:00,026
He convinced me to offer you
that job in Rome again.
313
00:15:00,099 --> 00:15:01,589
How do you respond?
314
00:15:03,369 --> 00:15:06,236
Thanks, but the answer is still no.
315
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:15,236
Lily, why the hell did you
turn that down again?
316
00:15:15,314 --> 00:15:18,477
Because I'd have to get
a new passport photo...
317
00:15:18,550 --> 00:15:21,417
and I'd miss out
on New York in August and...
318
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:24,012
Plus, they opened
a Shake Shack on our block, so...
319
00:15:24,089 --> 00:15:26,023
Lily, what's the real reason?
320
00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:28,449
What if we move to Rome...
321
00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:39,899
- What's so funny?
- I'm sorry.
322
00:15:39,972 --> 00:15:43,840
I can't believe you paid
10 million euros for this painting.
323
00:15:43,909 --> 00:15:46,309
- Why not?
- Because it's not even a painting.
324
00:15:46,378 --> 00:15:48,869
I spill my plate of scungilli
on a blank canvas.
325
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:51,041
Smell it. It's like a toilet.
326
00:15:52,051 --> 00:15:55,487
I just make you look, uh, stupido.
327
00:15:55,554 --> 00:15:57,954
- Lily, you're fired.
- What? But, no!
328
00:15:58,023 --> 00:15:59,513
I... Uh, it's still a great painting.
329
00:15:59,591 --> 00:16:02,617
I like what it says
about structure and society...
330
00:16:02,695 --> 00:16:04,219
and the changing roles of women.
331
00:16:15,474 --> 00:16:18,204
I used to be an art consultant.
332
00:16:26,618 --> 00:16:29,143
Hey, baby. It's time for Marvin's bottle.
333
00:16:30,389 --> 00:16:32,186
And all because I screwed up...
334
00:16:32,257 --> 00:16:35,192
and threw away a perfectly
comfortable life here in New York.
335
00:16:35,260 --> 00:16:37,023
Lily, you're not gonna screw up.
336
00:16:37,096 --> 00:16:39,792
You know what?
Just... Please just leave it alone.
337
00:16:39,865 --> 00:16:44,097
Besides, deep down, I don't think
Marshall's even excited about Italy.
338
00:16:44,169 --> 00:16:46,289
At that very moment in Little Italy...
339
00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:05,352
Maron'!
340
00:17:05,424 --> 00:17:07,016
I can't wait for my wedding day.
341
00:17:07,092 --> 00:17:11,256
I mean, there is no way
that Liddy is gonna be wearing that coat.
342
00:17:11,330 --> 00:17:12,957
Right? Right?
343
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:17,230
"Barney Stinson, do you hope she wears
something slinky and backless?"
344
00:17:17,302 --> 00:17:19,236
"I do."
345
00:17:20,906 --> 00:17:24,467
Okay. Can I just say something
as your best man?
346
00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:27,034
- Be careful.
- What do you mean?
347
00:17:27,112 --> 00:17:30,172
You just... You haven't been acting
like a guy who's about to get married.
348
00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:32,183
And I know you think it's okay
because Robin's so cool...
349
00:17:32,251 --> 00:17:35,709
but I'm telling you,
she's not as cool as you think she is.
350
00:17:35,788 --> 00:17:37,722
Oh.
351
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:39,280
I see.
352
00:17:39,358 --> 00:17:42,794
And you'd know this
because you know Robin better than I do.
353
00:17:42,861 --> 00:17:45,989
You know what she appreciates
better than her own fiancé.
354
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,625
I-I'm just saying,
if I was getting married in three weeks...
355
00:17:48,700 --> 00:17:51,692
But you're not getting
married in three weeks, Ted. I am.
356
00:17:51,770 --> 00:17:53,635
Robin's marrying me, not you.
357
00:17:56,475 --> 00:17:59,342
You're right. Not my place.
358
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:00,901
Why don't I get the next round?
359
00:18:06,518 --> 00:18:10,284
So, how many times
are you gonna say no to your dream job?
360
00:18:10,355 --> 00:18:12,084
I'm just trying to plan my day.
361
00:18:12,157 --> 00:18:14,352
I'm a scaredy-cat, okay?
362
00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:16,291
I want to be the type of person...
363
00:18:16,361 --> 00:18:18,625
that just charges fearlessly
into the unknown...
364
00:18:18,697 --> 00:18:23,191
but I came back two weeks early
from Paris because I was lonely.
365
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,532
I went to San Francisco...
366
00:18:25,604 --> 00:18:28,266
and I was never
more depressed in my life.
367
00:18:29,575 --> 00:18:31,440
I'm small-town, Marshall.
368
00:18:31,510 --> 00:18:34,536
I'm a hick from Brooklyn,
who's terrified of living...
369
00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:38,140
more than 10 subway stops
from where I was born.
370
00:18:38,217 --> 00:18:42,881
Okay, Lily, if I can move from
St. Cloud, Minnesota to New York City...
371
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:44,946
then you can move to Rome.
372
00:18:46,158 --> 00:18:47,648
We know nothing about Italy.
373
00:18:47,726 --> 00:18:50,456
We have no friends there.
We don't speak the language.
374
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:57,095
Okay. So you know that one sentence.
375
00:18:57,169 --> 00:18:58,659
Can you say anything else?
376
00:19:05,410 --> 00:19:06,971
But that... that was the same sentence.
377
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,810
You just changed the inflection.
378
00:19:49,087 --> 00:19:51,214
I love you too.
379
00:19:52,758 --> 00:19:54,692
All right. We're going to Italy.
380
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:56,625
S/I
381
00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:00,323
You may not know this yet, but, um...
382
00:20:00,399 --> 00:20:01,889
I've already done some shopping.
383
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:13,875
Welcome home.
384
00:20:16,815 --> 00:20:18,339
Oh.
385
00:20:18,417 --> 00:20:20,817
You are so cool.
386
00:20:23,488 --> 00:20:25,388
But not for long.
29868
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