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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,000 Downloaded From www.AllSubs.org 2 00:00:31,306 --> 00:00:32,796 Where's Hammond? 3 00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:38,568 I said where's Hammond! 4 00:01:50,018 --> 00:01:52,384 Lucky for you I gotta reload. 5 00:01:54,822 --> 00:01:59,282 Oh, there you are, you mangy fink coyote! 6 00:02:02,830 --> 00:02:05,025 I got a message for you from Rance Roden. 7 00:02:05,099 --> 00:02:09,695 He wants his gambling cut and protection fee by tonight... 8 00:02:09,771 --> 00:02:11,796 or I'm gonna come back here and... 9 00:02:15,376 --> 00:02:17,970 get rough. 10 00:02:20,815 --> 00:02:24,410 I don't want no trouble with Mr. Roden. 11 00:02:24,485 --> 00:02:26,419 Take the whole place! 12 00:02:26,487 --> 00:02:31,754 I'll take the next stage back to Ph-Ph-Philadelphia! 13 00:02:33,628 --> 00:02:36,358 Now you're gettin' smart. 14 00:02:47,241 --> 00:02:49,835 A fiery villain with the speed of light. 15 00:02:49,911 --> 00:02:54,678 A burst of bullets and a hearty "Hi-ho,yahoo!" 16 00:02:54,749 --> 00:02:57,877 The roaring frontier lives again! 17 00:02:57,952 --> 00:03:00,011 From out of the dusty fiiles of the Old West... 18 00:03:00,088 --> 00:03:03,524 comes the thundering truth of the great heroes of television: 19 00:03:03,591 --> 00:03:06,458 the unvarnished accounts and revolting revelations... 20 00:03:06,527 --> 00:03:09,155 of such assorted riffraff as Wyatt Earp... 21 00:03:09,230 --> 00:03:12,028 Bat Masterson and Wild Bill Hickok... 22 00:03:12,100 --> 00:03:16,332 men who in reality began their careers as evil desperadoes... 23 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:19,805 in total defiance of law and order. 24 00:03:19,874 --> 00:03:21,808 Now, if you fellas would add that up... 25 00:03:21,876 --> 00:03:25,539 you'd find that we're about 30 percent over last month's net... 26 00:03:25,613 --> 00:03:29,208 which proves again that so far we've just scratched the surface. 27 00:03:29,283 --> 00:03:31,251 - Now, I've said-- - You can take over... 28 00:03:31,319 --> 00:03:33,981 the Short Horn Saloon now, Mr. Roden. 29 00:03:34,055 --> 00:03:38,321 Hammond is quittin' business on account of his... health. 30 00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:40,519 Very good, Trigger. Put a little pressure on 'em... 31 00:03:40,595 --> 00:03:42,563 and they fold up like an accordion. 32 00:03:42,630 --> 00:03:45,599 I was just saying that up to now, things have been pretty good. 33 00:03:45,666 --> 00:03:47,600 But the sky's the limit. 34 00:03:47,668 --> 00:03:49,829 Especially with the organization we've got today. 35 00:03:49,904 --> 00:03:52,464 Wyatt Earp in Tombstone. 36 00:03:52,540 --> 00:03:55,703 Bat Masterson in Dodge City. 37 00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:58,473 Wild Bill Hickok in Abilene. 38 00:03:59,147 --> 00:04:02,913 - Jesse James in Missouri. - All that smoke! 39 00:04:04,786 --> 00:04:06,754 Billy the Kid in the Dakotas. 40 00:04:06,821 --> 00:04:09,016 - What are you doin'? - Playing western chicken. 41 00:04:09,090 --> 00:04:11,058 Not inside. 42 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:14,219 Not to mention Johnny Ringo in New Mexico. 43 00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:17,924 - Cole Younger in Cripple Creek. - Marshall Quizby, Deadwood. 44 00:04:17,999 --> 00:04:19,933 Makes an even hundred. 45 00:04:20,001 --> 00:04:23,402 - Beats me by two. - Rob Dalton in Nevada. 46 00:04:23,471 --> 00:04:26,770 Now, the syndicate is cleaning up in liquor, gambling... 47 00:04:26,841 --> 00:04:29,241 and every racket known to man or the devil. 48 00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:30,743 But we're gonna do better. 49 00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:32,837 Before we're through we're gonna take over... 50 00:04:32,914 --> 00:04:35,246 every territory west of the Mississippi! 51 00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:37,944 Just how do you aim to go about that? 52 00:04:38,019 --> 00:04:39,953 Get the Indians on the warpath. 53 00:04:40,021 --> 00:04:42,854 I want to see every tribe up in arms from here to California... 54 00:04:42,924 --> 00:04:44,619 and from Canada to the Gulf! 55 00:04:45,793 --> 00:04:48,956 All we have to do is exterminate the buffalo. 56 00:04:49,030 --> 00:04:52,193 With their food supply gone, they'll rise up by the thousands... 57 00:04:52,266 --> 00:04:54,291 mean, fightin' mad. 58 00:04:54,368 --> 00:04:57,098 They'll roll over the cavalry like a tidal wave. 59 00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:59,867 Once the cavalry's out of business, we'll take over. 60 00:05:03,077 --> 00:05:05,841 Now go on home and get busy. 61 00:05:05,913 --> 00:05:08,473 Open war on the buffalo. 62 00:05:08,549 --> 00:05:13,577 And if anybody tries to stop us, they're idiots-- dead idiots. 63 00:05:13,654 --> 00:05:13,821 All right, you idiots, hurry it up. 64 00:05:13,821 --> 00:05:15,914 All right, you idiots, hurry it up. 65 00:05:18,626 --> 00:05:21,561 - What are you stalling for? - We forgot our gas masks. 66 00:05:21,629 --> 00:05:24,393 Oh, yeah. 67 00:05:24,465 --> 00:05:27,332 Mr. Cab-- Mr. Cabot will be awfully angry... 68 00:05:27,401 --> 00:05:29,528 if we don't get the magazine off the press today. 69 00:05:29,604 --> 00:05:34,507 And besides, we have to include a picture of Elvis. 70 00:05:34,575 --> 00:05:38,978 Let's go. Now don't irritate Elvis. You know what happens. 71 00:05:39,046 --> 00:05:41,742 The last time, he hit me in the back of the neck. 72 00:05:46,921 --> 00:05:50,516 Come on, come on, come on. Come on, get going, boys. 73 00:05:50,591 --> 00:05:52,752 - Come on, come on, get a move on. - All right. 74 00:05:52,827 --> 00:05:56,661 - Hey, what do you want? - Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. 75 00:05:56,731 --> 00:06:00,167 Slowpoke. Now, you, you get the picture set for Elvis. 76 00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:02,202 You, get busy. 77 00:06:02,270 --> 00:06:04,204 And be careful. You remember last week? 78 00:06:04,272 --> 00:06:06,866 We had to bury your clothes and you, pretty near. 79 00:06:06,941 --> 00:06:09,205 - Yeah. - So you watch your p's and q's, eh? 80 00:06:09,277 --> 00:06:11,268 - Okay. - All right. 81 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:14,614 Watch out now. He's dangerous. 82 00:06:14,682 --> 00:06:16,616 I don't trust you either. 83 00:06:16,684 --> 00:06:19,812 All right, Elvis, come on. Come on out, boy. 84 00:06:19,887 --> 00:06:23,220 Come on, come on. Come on out here. 85 00:06:24,959 --> 00:06:26,449 Come on. 86 00:06:33,067 --> 00:06:34,830 Hey, Guttenberg. 87 00:06:37,872 --> 00:06:39,203 - I'm sorry. - Always the life of the party. 88 00:06:39,273 --> 00:06:41,673 - Accident. - Give me that! 89 00:06:44,045 --> 00:06:46,104 Why, you-- 90 00:06:49,216 --> 00:06:51,150 How do you like that? Now get over there... 91 00:06:51,218 --> 00:06:53,379 and help that other imbecile take a picture of Elvis! 92 00:06:53,454 --> 00:06:54,978 Oh, all right. 93 00:06:56,891 --> 00:06:59,724 - Are you all set, Larry? - I am, but the skunk ain't. 94 00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:03,628 Do me a favor. Dump him out of the cage while I get the camera set. 95 00:07:03,698 --> 00:07:06,030 Oh, I'm not picking up no skunk's cage... 96 00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:08,034 because he'll give it to me. 97 00:07:08,102 --> 00:07:10,627 And when he gives it to you, you get it good. 98 00:07:10,705 --> 00:07:13,265 Oh, I'll get the camera ready. 99 00:07:13,341 --> 00:07:15,468 I'll get the light now. 100 00:07:32,693 --> 00:07:34,524 - How are you comin', Larry? - Not so good. 101 00:07:49,076 --> 00:07:51,306 I'm sorry, Moe. Say! 102 00:07:51,379 --> 00:07:53,677 This is gonna be a sensational issue. 103 00:07:53,748 --> 00:07:58,310 It says here, "Once, a hundred million buffalo roamed the West." 104 00:07:58,386 --> 00:08:00,377 Well, what do you know. 105 00:08:00,454 --> 00:08:03,548 "Continued on page three, column four." 106 00:08:05,059 --> 00:08:09,393 "And they're disappearing at the rate of 5,000 a day." 107 00:08:11,165 --> 00:08:14,362 There's more on column nine, page three. 108 00:08:14,435 --> 00:08:16,903 AT&T are splittin' two for one. 109 00:08:16,971 --> 00:08:19,496 I'll split your head open! What's the matter with you? 110 00:08:20,241 --> 00:08:22,607 - Leave him alone! - You, I'll tear your hair out! 111 00:08:22,676 --> 00:08:25,076 Boys! Boys, please! 112 00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:27,274 I'm working. 113 00:08:27,348 --> 00:08:29,475 That's all right. You're not bothering us, Mr. Cabot. 114 00:08:31,318 --> 00:08:34,253 Let me know the minute Mr. Abernathy arrives. 115 00:08:34,321 --> 00:08:37,722 Sure. Sure will. Now get over there and take care of the picture. 116 00:08:37,792 --> 00:08:39,487 Come on. Get going. 117 00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:41,494 Get in there, you morons. Go ahead! 118 00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:47,167 Come on, Elvis,just one picture, then you can go home as you are-- 119 00:08:47,234 --> 00:08:49,532 half-safe, like the other two skunks. 120 00:08:50,237 --> 00:08:52,569 You see? He's stubborn. 121 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,165 Hey, fellas, wait a minute. Wait. Wait. 122 00:08:57,278 --> 00:09:00,475 How about trying out my all-purpose hunting horn, huh? 123 00:09:00,548 --> 00:09:04,575 Hunting horn? That looks like an unborn piccolo. 124 00:09:04,652 --> 00:09:06,279 What'll you do with that? 125 00:09:06,353 --> 00:09:09,015 Well, if I can get a moose out of the woods with a moose call... 126 00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:11,285 and a duck in my duck blind with a duck call... 127 00:09:11,358 --> 00:09:15,658 maybe I can get the skunk out of the cage with a skunk call. 128 00:09:15,729 --> 00:09:17,754 Now, let me see. 129 00:09:17,832 --> 00:09:21,495 Yesterday with a F-sharp and a C- major... 130 00:09:21,569 --> 00:09:23,799 I got pigeons. 131 00:09:23,871 --> 00:09:26,203 This calls for B-flat. 132 00:09:27,808 --> 00:09:30,902 I wonder what Mozart would have done in a situation like this? 133 00:09:31,612 --> 00:09:34,342 I think this calls for a pizzicato fortissimo... 134 00:09:34,415 --> 00:09:36,474 with a fast-breaking cadenza. 135 00:09:46,861 --> 00:09:49,796 That's a fast-blowing cadenza. I'll fracture your skull! 136 00:09:49,864 --> 00:09:51,798 - Come on, come on, come on. - Out, out, out. 137 00:09:51,866 --> 00:09:55,632 I know the trouble. Too much "pizzi" in my pizzicato. 138 00:09:55,703 --> 00:09:57,637 Try it again. Yeah, I know now. 139 00:10:04,245 --> 00:10:07,078 - Mr. Cabot! - Mr. Abernathy! 140 00:10:10,684 --> 00:10:15,246 - Mr. Abernathy! - Help! Mr. Cabot! Help! 141 00:10:16,690 --> 00:10:18,817 Take it easy, Mr. Abernathy. Easy, now. 142 00:10:18,893 --> 00:10:21,088 Everything will be all right. Here, get out of there! 143 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:23,289 Don't you dare touch Mr. Abernathy. 144 00:10:23,364 --> 00:10:25,889 Now, you leave Mr. Abernathy alone! Get out of here! 145 00:10:25,966 --> 00:10:28,298 Go on! Right this way, Mr. Abernathy. 146 00:10:28,369 --> 00:10:30,769 Let go of me! Take your hands off! Get away from me! 147 00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:32,328 Mr. Abernathy. 148 00:10:33,541 --> 00:10:35,532 - Hey. - Oh, Mr. Abernathy, I-- 149 00:10:35,609 --> 00:10:39,170 - What's going on around here? - We're just, uh... 150 00:10:39,246 --> 00:10:41,214 getting the magazine out, sir... 151 00:10:41,282 --> 00:10:43,216 with another hard-hitting editorial... 152 00:10:43,284 --> 00:10:45,218 on the slaughter of the buffalo! 153 00:10:45,286 --> 00:10:47,345 Editorials aren't enough, Cabot. 154 00:10:47,421 --> 00:10:49,787 I had a meeting with our directors last night at dinner... 155 00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:53,884 and we arranged to have you sent out west to look into this thing. 156 00:10:53,961 --> 00:10:55,895 M-Me? 157 00:10:56,897 --> 00:11:01,300 - I mean, me way out west? - That's what I said. 158 00:11:01,368 --> 00:11:03,632 I've already arranged to have your press sent to Wyoming. 159 00:11:03,704 --> 00:11:06,036 Come here. Take a look. 160 00:11:06,106 --> 00:11:09,507 Now, do you know what that this? A buffalo census chart. 161 00:11:09,577 --> 00:11:11,943 Look at that. You see that line? 162 00:11:12,012 --> 00:11:15,778 That thing is trying to get right down into the basement. 163 00:11:15,849 --> 00:11:17,783 And that is a big cellar. 164 00:11:17,851 --> 00:11:20,513 Give me another chance. I know I can do it. 165 00:11:20,588 --> 00:11:22,988 I got it in there. I just got to get it out. 166 00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:25,548 Unless preventive measures are taken at once... 167 00:11:25,626 --> 00:11:28,356 in ten years there won't be a single buffalo left... 168 00:11:28,429 --> 00:11:30,727 on the whole continent of North America. 169 00:11:30,798 --> 00:11:34,097 There's no two ways about it. You've got to go to Wyoming immediately. 170 00:11:34,168 --> 00:11:34,368 - Give me an A, Moe. - A. 171 00:11:34,368 --> 00:11:36,632 - Give me an A, Moe. - A. 172 00:12:00,527 --> 00:12:03,860 I knew I could do it. All I needed was a reverse cadenza. 173 00:12:03,931 --> 00:12:05,990 Keep him in the mood, Joe. 174 00:12:08,702 --> 00:12:10,397 Did I? 175 00:12:10,471 --> 00:12:13,531 Well, it's better to be half safe than half sure. 176 00:12:19,647 --> 00:12:21,774 Oh, that's beautiful, Elvis. 177 00:12:28,889 --> 00:12:31,414 - Ready, Larry? - Light 'er up! 178 00:12:39,667 --> 00:12:41,692 - Mr. Cabot! - What happened? 179 00:12:41,769 --> 00:12:45,830 Mr. Cabot! Mr. Cabot! Just a minute, Mr. Cabot! 180 00:12:45,906 --> 00:12:49,171 - Take it easy. - What happened here? 181 00:12:49,243 --> 00:12:51,734 That's what we're trying to find out. 182 00:12:51,812 --> 00:12:54,212 - You all right? - What am I doing on this moose? 183 00:12:59,987 --> 00:13:03,548 Cabot, this is the last straw! 184 00:13:03,624 --> 00:13:07,082 I want these rogues dismissed immediately! 185 00:13:07,161 --> 00:13:11,962 Mr. Abernathy, I'm sure the whole thing was unavoidable. 186 00:13:12,032 --> 00:13:15,331 Makes no difference! I don't want them around here! 187 00:13:15,402 --> 00:13:17,336 And that's final. 188 00:13:18,972 --> 00:13:21,304 You understand? 189 00:13:21,375 --> 00:13:24,037 You can take them out west with you, if you wish. 190 00:13:24,111 --> 00:13:28,309 - I can? - But don't bring them back! 191 00:13:28,382 --> 00:13:32,614 - Yes, sir, yes, sir. - What is this about out west? 192 00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:36,747 Well, you see, Mr. Abernathy's sending me out to Wyoming... 193 00:13:36,824 --> 00:13:40,658 to try to do something about the vanishing buffalo herds... 194 00:13:40,728 --> 00:13:42,662 and I'm afraid-- 195 00:13:42,730 --> 00:13:45,995 That is, I'm afraid that you're gonna have to go with me... 196 00:13:46,066 --> 00:13:48,500 - Not me. - if you want to keep your jobs. 197 00:13:48,569 --> 00:13:50,628 No, no. Not me in Wyoming. 198 00:13:50,704 --> 00:13:52,831 It's full of gunslingers, Gila monsters... 199 00:13:52,906 --> 00:13:55,136 - rattlesnakes and lndians! - Yeah. 200 00:13:55,209 --> 00:13:58,144 And besides, it's against our religion. 201 00:13:58,212 --> 00:14:01,443 Yeah. We're devout cowards. 202 00:14:01,515 --> 00:14:04,450 Do you mean to say that you would let Mr. Cabot... 203 00:14:04,518 --> 00:14:06,816 face all these dangers alone? 204 00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:08,821 - Yes! - Yes! 205 00:14:09,990 --> 00:14:13,357 - What's the matter with you? - Wyoming, here we come! 206 00:14:13,427 --> 00:14:15,952 Yeah. We're on our way west. 207 00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:18,827 Way out west where the air is fresh and pure... 208 00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:22,335 scented with the aroma of purple sage. 209 00:14:26,206 --> 00:14:28,640 Watch it. Fellas, watch it. Watch it. 210 00:14:28,709 --> 00:14:30,700 He's getting ready. He's aimin'. He's aimin'. 211 00:14:30,778 --> 00:14:33,838 Put that down, you. 212 00:14:37,785 --> 00:14:40,982 We should be in Wyoming this afternoon. 213 00:14:41,054 --> 00:14:45,047 Only two months and twenty days out of Boston. 214 00:14:49,696 --> 00:14:51,857 Not a sign of buffalo. 215 00:14:54,401 --> 00:14:56,733 Looks pretty bad, boys. 216 00:14:56,804 --> 00:14:59,068 - Hey, Paderewski. - Yeah? 217 00:14:59,139 --> 00:15:01,664 Why don't you try to whip up a buffalo call? 218 00:15:01,742 --> 00:15:06,008 Yeah. It worked with Elvis. Maybe I can stir up a few. 219 00:15:06,079 --> 00:15:09,742 You stir 'em up and then you drive 'em away with those screechy notes. 220 00:15:09,817 --> 00:15:12,684 Jealousy will get you nowhere. Listen. 221 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:21,751 Hey, fellas, look! 222 00:15:27,768 --> 00:15:29,861 They're beautiful. Beautiful. 223 00:15:30,637 --> 00:15:31,934 Buffalo! 224 00:15:32,005 --> 00:15:35,497 I told you. I told you! With the right kind of pizzicato... 225 00:15:35,576 --> 00:15:38,670 this horn will lure any animal there is. 226 00:15:38,745 --> 00:15:40,337 - Any animal? - Yep. 227 00:15:40,414 --> 00:15:43,042 - You talk like an idiot. - Then you understand me. 228 00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:47,075 Well, now that we finally arrived on the lawless frontier... 229 00:15:47,154 --> 00:15:50,282 I think we should be prepared. 230 00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:56,027 Oh, it's okay, boys. It's not loaded. 231 00:15:57,664 --> 00:16:00,565 Oh, Mr. Cabot, please, please. In the chamber. 232 00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:02,693 Here. Let me show you, please. 233 00:16:02,769 --> 00:16:05,863 - Here we are. - Moe knows all about it. 234 00:16:05,939 --> 00:16:08,965 Yeah, you see, you open the side door here... 235 00:16:09,042 --> 00:16:11,840 and you put it in these windows here, those little windows. 236 00:16:11,912 --> 00:16:14,244 Right down there. There. 237 00:16:14,314 --> 00:16:16,282 That's it. See? 238 00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:26,417 Whoa, honey, whoa. Whoa, honey. 239 00:16:26,493 --> 00:16:29,690 "Entering Casper... at your own risk"? 240 00:16:30,898 --> 00:16:33,128 Well, I wouldn't worry about that, boys. 241 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,135 The West is really known for its friendliness. 242 00:16:36,203 --> 00:16:38,933 That don't look very friendly to me. 243 00:16:58,025 --> 00:16:59,515 Giddup, partner. 244 00:17:07,668 --> 00:17:09,602 - What's today? - The 17 th. 245 00:17:09,670 --> 00:17:13,367 Right on schedule. Hey, fellas, look! 246 00:17:27,588 --> 00:17:32,548 "Sheriff wanted. No experience necessary"? 247 00:17:32,626 --> 00:17:35,151 Boy, they really got a handy arrangement here. 248 00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:38,425 Are you still gonna stay here? Ken! 249 00:17:38,498 --> 00:17:41,592 - Who, me? - Yeah. 250 00:17:41,668 --> 00:17:45,900 Why, yes. Yes, I suppose I must. 251 00:17:45,973 --> 00:17:47,998 - So am I! - Me too! 252 00:17:48,075 --> 00:17:52,307 Well, if you're gonna stay here and you two guys are gonna stay here... 253 00:17:52,379 --> 00:17:55,177 - there's only one thing I can say. - What's that? 254 00:17:55,248 --> 00:17:58,706 - Good luck! - You would! Come on here! 255 00:17:58,785 --> 00:18:00,719 Well, if we intend to find out what's going on... 256 00:18:00,787 --> 00:18:03,415 I guess the saloon is the best place to get started. 257 00:18:03,490 --> 00:18:06,926 - I'd say so. - Yeah, let's give it a try. 258 00:18:14,134 --> 00:18:17,900 Three blind mice Three blind mice 259 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:19,905 They all ran after the farmer's wife 260 00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:22,373 They all ran after the farmer's wife 261 00:18:28,081 --> 00:18:32,017 - Three blind mice, three blind mice - A Japanese Beatle? 262 00:18:33,153 --> 00:18:34,643 Hey, boys. 263 00:18:40,394 --> 00:18:43,955 Top prices plus a bounty for buffalo hides! 264 00:18:44,031 --> 00:18:47,364 Why, this is the most outrageous thing I've ever heard of. 265 00:18:47,434 --> 00:18:49,732 - Who's responsible for this? - Yeah! 266 00:18:49,803 --> 00:18:52,966 - I demand to see him at once! - Well... 267 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,907 I'd be happy to arrange that for you, stranger. 268 00:18:55,976 --> 00:18:57,238 Rance! 269 00:18:57,310 --> 00:18:59,744 - Was he the man respon-- - Never mind who the man responsible is. 270 00:18:59,813 --> 00:19:02,941 - What's the trouble, Trigger? - Well, this gentlemen... 271 00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:06,645 seems to be taking objection to something that we're carrying on our poster. 272 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,950 Oh? Who might you be? 273 00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:11,957 Kenneth Cabot from Boston, Massachusetts, sir. 274 00:19:12,025 --> 00:19:13,959 And these are my friends. 275 00:19:14,027 --> 00:19:16,086 I must protest this sacrilege. 276 00:19:16,163 --> 00:19:18,358 Do you not know that the buffalo is the most noble... 277 00:19:18,432 --> 00:19:20,923 of the native beasts remaining on this continent... 278 00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:24,767 and that we are here for the expressed purpose of saving them from extinction? 279 00:19:24,838 --> 00:19:28,433 - What'd he say? - Quiet, you imbecile. 280 00:19:28,508 --> 00:19:31,807 - Why, you buttinsky-- - No. Take it easy, take it easy. 281 00:19:31,878 --> 00:19:33,869 Now, we can settle this quietly. 282 00:19:33,947 --> 00:19:36,313 First, gentleman, I'm Rance Roden. 283 00:19:36,383 --> 00:19:38,408 I kind of run things around here. 284 00:19:38,485 --> 00:19:41,648 This is my partner, Trigger Mortis. 285 00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:45,681 Now, like gentlemen, why don't we step inside and have one on the house? 286 00:19:45,759 --> 00:19:48,626 - Mighty nice of you, stranger. - Real Western hospitality. 287 00:19:48,695 --> 00:19:50,663 Yes, sir. 288 00:19:52,199 --> 00:19:54,133 Thanks. 289 00:19:57,604 --> 00:19:59,799 Find out who's behind that dude... 290 00:19:59,873 --> 00:20:02,341 and we'll take it from there. 291 00:21:49,182 --> 00:21:52,481 It's all right, sonny. It's only Annie Oakley. 292 00:22:18,845 --> 00:22:21,177 Oh, pardon me, sir. I-- Oh, hello, Moe. 293 00:22:21,248 --> 00:22:23,842 You clumsy idiot! 294 00:22:23,917 --> 00:22:25,851 Leave him alone. 295 00:22:25,919 --> 00:22:28,410 And I told Rance Roden again and again... 296 00:22:28,488 --> 00:22:31,616 that the one thing I can't stand in this place... 297 00:22:31,691 --> 00:22:33,659 is tassels. 298 00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:37,686 And I aim to get rid of them the hard way. 299 00:22:45,872 --> 00:22:48,670 Another tassel, and it's gotta go! 300 00:22:48,742 --> 00:22:51,939 And I think I'll just save him another trip to the barber... 301 00:22:52,012 --> 00:22:53,946 with my famous slow bullet. 302 00:22:54,014 --> 00:22:58,041 While we're all waiting, I'll just put a silver dollar down on number 40. 303 00:22:58,118 --> 00:23:00,052 Everybody ready? 304 00:23:23,910 --> 00:23:25,844 In my account. 305 00:23:28,281 --> 00:23:33,275 Nice goin', Annie. She never misses, do you, doll? 306 00:23:33,353 --> 00:23:35,287 Gentlemen? 307 00:23:42,862 --> 00:23:46,195 Who's the good-lookin' stranger with the busy eyes? 308 00:23:46,266 --> 00:23:50,726 Some pencil-neck from back East out here trying to tell us how to run our business. 309 00:23:50,804 --> 00:23:54,763 Sweetheart, I've been thinking about you all day. 310 00:24:08,021 --> 00:24:10,854 A buffalo contest? 311 00:24:12,559 --> 00:24:15,687 Why, this is contemptible! Inhuman! 312 00:24:15,762 --> 00:24:17,457 I'm warning you, sir. 313 00:24:17,530 --> 00:24:20,260 If this shameful practice isn't stopped immediately... 314 00:24:20,333 --> 00:24:22,301 I shall wire full details to my employers... 315 00:24:22,369 --> 00:24:24,303 the Society for the Protection of American Wildlife... 316 00:24:24,371 --> 00:24:27,101 - I'll be back. - and the United States government! 317 00:24:29,709 --> 00:24:32,769 Something bothering you, Mr. Cabot? 318 00:24:32,846 --> 00:24:35,474 Indeed there is, Mr. Roden. 319 00:24:35,548 --> 00:24:37,209 I'll wager that this contest... 320 00:24:37,283 --> 00:24:39,751 is exactly what's causing the bad feeling among the lndians. 321 00:24:40,487 --> 00:24:44,116 And it may very well send them on a warpath. 322 00:24:48,695 --> 00:24:50,754 Now, if we don't kill off them buffalo... 323 00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:58,303 they're gonna eat up all the range grass west of the Mississippi. 324 00:24:58,371 --> 00:25:01,431 I hardly think that's possible, sir. 325 00:25:01,508 --> 00:25:05,968 Now, no eastern pantywaist is gonna waltz in here and call me a liar! 326 00:25:09,249 --> 00:25:12,946 - Draw! - Just a minute. This man is unarmed! 327 00:25:26,266 --> 00:25:29,167 Now, when I count to three... 328 00:25:29,235 --> 00:25:31,499 you be ready to use that piece. 329 00:25:35,175 --> 00:25:37,109 One! 330 00:25:41,281 --> 00:25:42,270 Two! 331 00:25:47,887 --> 00:25:49,218 Three! 332 00:26:01,901 --> 00:26:04,927 - Good shootin', Mr. Cabot. - Oh, that was wonderful, wonderful! 333 00:26:05,004 --> 00:26:08,167 Yeah, you're gonna do all right. Boy! 334 00:26:08,241 --> 00:26:13,304 As one expert to another, stranger, that was dang good shootin'. 335 00:26:13,379 --> 00:26:15,176 Attention, everybody! Attention! 336 00:26:15,248 --> 00:26:18,240 Now, we all know it takes a powerful gun... 337 00:26:18,318 --> 00:26:20,946 to maintain law and order here in Casper. 338 00:26:21,020 --> 00:26:23,580 And this shooting exhibition I just saw... 339 00:26:23,656 --> 00:26:26,853 which is about the best I have ever seen... 340 00:26:26,926 --> 00:26:32,023 makes me want to nominate Mr. Kenneth Cabot for our next sheriff. 341 00:26:32,098 --> 00:26:34,362 And his three friends can be the deputies. 342 00:26:37,504 --> 00:26:41,065 Here you are, Mr. Cabot, still warm from the last sheriff. 343 00:26:41,141 --> 00:26:45,202 Good luck. And good luck to you gentlemen. 344 00:26:45,278 --> 00:26:46,336 - Thank you. - Thank you. 345 00:26:46,412 --> 00:26:48,346 - Hey, Moe, Moe-- - Oh, please, please. 346 00:26:48,414 --> 00:26:50,678 - Hey, we're in town only an hour... - Hey, Moe. 347 00:26:50,750 --> 00:26:53,082 - What's the matter-- - and they already made us deputies! 348 00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:56,611 - Moe, this is important. - What do you want? 349 00:26:56,689 --> 00:27:00,955 - What's the date tomorrow? - The 18th. 350 00:27:01,027 --> 00:27:02,961 - The 18th! - The 18th! 351 00:27:05,331 --> 00:27:09,529 - Not, not-- - Hey, who sent for the Smiley Brothers? 352 00:27:09,602 --> 00:27:12,400 Hey, you guys are a day early. Take it easy. 353 00:27:58,885 --> 00:28:01,718 Okay, boys, if you'll start distributing those leaflets to the saloon... 354 00:28:01,788 --> 00:28:04,689 - I'll get these to other communities. - Right! 355 00:28:04,757 --> 00:28:07,248 - Oh, I'm sorry. - Good morning, Sheriff. 356 00:28:07,327 --> 00:28:09,659 You know, the sheriff was on his way to the post office. 357 00:28:09,729 --> 00:28:12,254 - If you happen to be going that way-- - Oh, sure. Here. 358 00:28:12,332 --> 00:28:14,266 - Let me help you. - Oh, no, thanks, ma'am. 359 00:28:14,334 --> 00:28:16,996 I'll manage just fine. 360 00:28:23,076 --> 00:28:25,374 Well, I guess he's just not interested in her. 361 00:28:25,445 --> 00:28:28,642 - And after she saved his life. - And we can't tell him either. 362 00:28:28,715 --> 00:28:31,206 It's a shame. She'd be a nice girl for him... 363 00:28:31,284 --> 00:28:33,275 if she was more of a lady. 364 00:28:33,353 --> 00:28:37,414 Yeah. Too bad he can't give her a little that he's got. 365 00:28:37,490 --> 00:28:38,479 Like class? 366 00:28:38,558 --> 00:28:41,550 And she could give him a little that she's got and don't need. 367 00:28:41,628 --> 00:28:42,822 Like courage. 368 00:28:42,895 --> 00:28:46,160 - Then we'd have a man's man. - And a man's woman too. 369 00:28:46,232 --> 00:28:48,757 - I'd better start. - Yes, let's go. 370 00:28:53,106 --> 00:28:56,564 Hi, sonny, you look like you can read. 371 00:28:56,643 --> 00:28:58,736 You look like a jackass! 372 00:28:59,912 --> 00:29:02,506 Why, that-- 373 00:29:02,582 --> 00:29:05,915 There's only one thing I'd ask for if I had to tangle with that guy. 374 00:29:05,985 --> 00:29:08,977 - You mean a fair fight? - No, I mean a head start. 375 00:29:09,055 --> 00:29:10,989 Come on! Go ahead! 376 00:29:13,226 --> 00:29:15,524 - Here. Read all about it. - Save the buffalo from extinction! 377 00:29:15,595 --> 00:29:20,055 - There you are. - Get some and pass them to your friends. 378 00:29:22,035 --> 00:29:23,525 Whiskey. 379 00:29:26,272 --> 00:29:27,933 Leave the bottle. 380 00:29:28,007 --> 00:29:30,874 I'll have a Coke. And leave the bottle. 381 00:29:30,943 --> 00:29:33,503 Give him a Tarantula Fizz. 382 00:29:33,579 --> 00:29:35,672 Ignore him. I want a Coke. 383 00:29:38,651 --> 00:29:40,881 Well, what's holding up my Tarantula Fizz? 384 00:29:40,953 --> 00:29:43,285 Come, come, my man. Come, come. 385 00:29:43,356 --> 00:29:44,880 Put two tarantulas in mine. 386 00:29:51,497 --> 00:29:53,590 Bourbon, one day old. 387 00:29:57,970 --> 00:29:59,597 "Teckilah." 388 00:29:59,672 --> 00:30:02,266 - Sounds like an internal hotfoot. - Who knows? 389 00:30:06,879 --> 00:30:09,074 Fresh gin. 390 00:30:21,728 --> 00:30:24,629 Don't forget the cactus twist. 391 00:30:40,380 --> 00:30:42,644 That's that cactus doing the twist, I think. 392 00:30:55,928 --> 00:30:59,955 - Drink up. - Do I have to? 393 00:31:01,033 --> 00:31:02,432 Yeah, I have to. 394 00:31:20,953 --> 00:31:22,887 How is it, Moe? 395 00:31:22,955 --> 00:31:25,515 - They-- They watered it. 396 00:31:25,591 --> 00:31:27,559 Well, if it's watered, then you-- 397 00:31:27,627 --> 00:31:30,960 Me. Here's lookin' at ya. 398 00:31:47,914 --> 00:31:49,848 It is watered. 399 00:31:49,916 --> 00:31:51,907 Short life. 400 00:31:53,219 --> 00:31:55,346 You said it! Short life, chum! 401 00:31:55,421 --> 00:31:58,185 Hey, hey, wait! Wait a minute, wait a minute! 402 00:31:58,257 --> 00:31:59,884 - Hey, you, come here. - Me? 403 00:31:59,959 --> 00:32:03,122 Yeah, you. Come here. I notice you're wearing a Colt. 404 00:32:03,196 --> 00:32:04,993 - Oh, yeah. - I handle the line out here... 405 00:32:05,064 --> 00:32:06,725 so I hope you don't mind my asking. 406 00:32:06,799 --> 00:32:09,859 How do you like our gun compared with the-- 407 00:32:09,936 --> 00:32:11,426 Oh, very much. 408 00:32:11,504 --> 00:32:15,031 Since I've been using the Colt, I get four out of five bull's-eyes. 409 00:32:15,107 --> 00:32:17,769 But with a-- I'm lucky if I get two. 410 00:32:19,679 --> 00:32:23,547 - Hey, Joe, you wearing a Colt? - No, I got a horse pistol. 411 00:32:23,616 --> 00:32:25,880 I raised it from a Colt. 412 00:32:30,256 --> 00:32:33,453 You know, these guys are-- 413 00:32:34,260 --> 00:32:36,091 Pretty bad situation, eh? 414 00:32:36,162 --> 00:32:38,858 We figure we're doing the community a big favor. 415 00:32:38,931 --> 00:32:40,865 - You said it, mister. - Yeah. 416 00:32:40,933 --> 00:32:43,128 And I'm gonna do the community an even bigger favor. 417 00:32:43,202 --> 00:32:45,864 - Oh, he's a nice fella. - Yeah. 418 00:32:45,938 --> 00:32:49,305 - Wait. Easy, easy now. - Take it easy. 419 00:32:49,375 --> 00:32:50,899 Easy, now! 420 00:32:50,977 --> 00:32:53,036 I thought you were gonna do good for the community. 421 00:32:53,112 --> 00:32:55,046 - Yeah. - I am! 422 00:32:55,114 --> 00:32:57,105 You are? Whoa! 423 00:32:59,085 --> 00:33:01,019 Now, I'm warning you. 424 00:33:01,087 --> 00:33:03,021 That was a fella that I know for many, many years. 425 00:33:03,089 --> 00:33:05,489 And you'd better watch your step, that's all-- Hey! 426 00:33:05,558 --> 00:33:07,719 Moe, Moe, Moe! Oh, look out! 427 00:33:10,997 --> 00:33:13,465 What are you sweatin' about, buddy boy? You been working hard or somethin'? 428 00:33:13,533 --> 00:33:16,934 - They're my-- Hey, watch it! - Get out of here! 429 00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:22,835 - The nerve that guy's got! - Give the horses a drink. 430 00:33:22,909 --> 00:33:24,843 Here you are, baby. 431 00:33:27,079 --> 00:33:29,013 Annie, honey, I can't make you out. 432 00:33:29,081 --> 00:33:31,914 Now, first you wanted to wait until the middle of summer to get hitched. 433 00:33:31,984 --> 00:33:33,952 Now you're tryin' to stall till the first of the year. 434 00:33:34,020 --> 00:33:37,421 Oh, I suppose that's the nature of women, to be ornery, Rance... 435 00:33:37,490 --> 00:33:39,424 especially us blondes. 436 00:33:39,492 --> 00:33:42,017 Rance, that pesky new sher-- 437 00:33:42,094 --> 00:33:44,085 Oh, uh, pardon me. 438 00:33:44,163 --> 00:33:47,098 That's all right, Trigger, but next time, knock. 439 00:33:47,166 --> 00:33:49,498 - Annie-- - I know. I know. 440 00:33:49,569 --> 00:33:51,503 Business meetin', gentlemen. 441 00:33:51,571 --> 00:33:54,369 I bid you adios. 442 00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:56,374 Well? 443 00:33:56,442 --> 00:34:00,708 That new sheriff's got those three idiots passin' these out all over town. 444 00:34:00,780 --> 00:34:02,645 "Save the buffalo." 445 00:34:02,715 --> 00:34:06,207 Cabot's gettin' too big for his britches. You gotta stop him, Rance! 446 00:34:06,953 --> 00:34:09,251 What's stopping you from stopping him? 447 00:34:11,757 --> 00:34:12,883 I gotcha. 448 00:34:12,959 --> 00:34:15,951 And I know how to do that for permanent. 449 00:34:42,054 --> 00:34:44,818 Wow! What a blast! 450 00:34:46,592 --> 00:34:49,459 - Watch that light! They might come back. - Oh, I doubt that. 451 00:34:49,528 --> 00:34:52,827 They think they blowed the whole kit and caboodle of you to kingdom come! 452 00:34:52,898 --> 00:34:56,994 Good thing you warned us, otherwise they'd be sweeping us up right now. 453 00:34:57,069 --> 00:34:59,936 Well, obviously Roden's determined to put us out of business... 454 00:35:00,006 --> 00:35:02,941 by fair means or foul. 455 00:35:03,009 --> 00:35:04,943 But why? 456 00:35:05,011 --> 00:35:09,414 He knows this buffalo slaughter's infuriating the lndians. 457 00:35:09,482 --> 00:35:11,450 I wonder. 458 00:35:13,853 --> 00:35:16,845 Don't be too sure, Sheriff. 459 00:35:16,922 --> 00:35:18,856 A little bird told me that the tribes are plannin'... 460 00:35:18,924 --> 00:35:21,188 a big powwow in the hills tomorrow... 461 00:35:21,260 --> 00:35:25,253 - and they ain't all gonna be lndians. - Where in the hills? 462 00:35:25,331 --> 00:35:27,925 At Bald Knob, their secret meetin' place. 463 00:35:28,668 --> 00:35:32,263 Maybe if we mosey up there, we'll get the lowdown. 464 00:35:32,338 --> 00:35:34,932 That's a good idea, fellas. You go ahead up to Bald Knob... 465 00:35:35,007 --> 00:35:37,407 and I'll stay here and crank out leaflets. 466 00:35:37,476 --> 00:35:39,239 It could be dangerous here. 467 00:35:40,312 --> 00:35:42,280 You don't have to worry about me. 468 00:35:42,348 --> 00:35:44,316 I can take care of myself. 469 00:35:44,383 --> 00:35:46,681 But, Mr. Cabot! 470 00:35:46,752 --> 00:35:48,686 You boys go ahead. 471 00:35:48,754 --> 00:35:51,814 I'm sure the sheriff can take care of himself. 472 00:35:53,192 --> 00:35:56,787 - Bald Knob, here we come. - Yes, sir! Bald Knob, here we come. 473 00:35:59,031 --> 00:36:02,865 Chief Red Cloud. Sioux. Okay. Okay. 474 00:36:02,935 --> 00:36:05,301 Chief Black Hawk. Cheyenne. Okay. 475 00:36:09,508 --> 00:36:13,000 - What tribe are you? - Escrow lndians. 476 00:36:13,079 --> 00:36:16,537 - Cleveland lndians. - Me Squaw Hootenanny. 477 00:36:26,492 --> 00:36:29,325 Have special deal for great Chief Battle Horse. 478 00:36:30,062 --> 00:36:32,496 Paleface kill buffalo. 479 00:36:32,565 --> 00:36:35,966 Now red man with thunder wagon take many weekend trips... 480 00:36:36,035 --> 00:36:38,003 drive settlers from hunting grounds... 481 00:36:38,070 --> 00:36:42,666 and guaranteed for 1 2,000 soldiers or 1 2,000 miles. 482 00:36:42,742 --> 00:36:45,768 - Whichever comes first. - Right. 483 00:36:47,012 --> 00:36:49,503 Fire-breathing wagon spit like lightning... 484 00:36:49,582 --> 00:36:51,846 make big boom like many thunderstorms! 485 00:36:51,917 --> 00:36:55,182 Soon white man crushed. Buffalo come back... 486 00:36:55,254 --> 00:36:58,280 with thunder of many pounding hooves! 487 00:36:59,492 --> 00:37:01,460 What he say, son Charlie Horse? 488 00:37:01,527 --> 00:37:04,155 Oh, he wants to sell us that souped-up hot rod... 489 00:37:04,230 --> 00:37:07,028 together with some guns and ammo. 490 00:37:07,099 --> 00:37:09,363 You know, if you'd cut out that broken English... 491 00:37:09,435 --> 00:37:11,369 and that cornball pantomime... 492 00:37:11,437 --> 00:37:14,964 this transaction would proceed a lot faster. 493 00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:16,598 Where did you learn to talk like that? 494 00:37:16,675 --> 00:37:19,644 Alabama U. I majored in poetry. 495 00:37:19,712 --> 00:37:22,146 Why them no-good, double-crossing-- 496 00:37:24,984 --> 00:37:27,145 With these thunder wagons, Chief, you can wipe out the cavalry... 497 00:37:27,219 --> 00:37:29,153 and every paleface in the West. 498 00:37:29,889 --> 00:37:30,981 Take a look! 499 00:37:36,095 --> 00:37:40,589 - Looks like the Monitor. - A battleship on wheels. 500 00:37:40,666 --> 00:37:42,827 Quiet! 501 00:37:44,170 --> 00:37:46,104 Easy, Sunstroke, easy! 502 00:37:46,906 --> 00:37:49,306 Chief, nothing can stand up to these thunder wagons. 503 00:37:49,375 --> 00:37:51,309 Watch the way the magic skin turns away bullets. 504 00:37:56,148 --> 00:37:59,709 Fire-spitting rifle kill many palefaces. 505 00:37:59,785 --> 00:38:02,219 Give 'em a short burst and let 'er roll. 506 00:38:11,664 --> 00:38:14,098 Okay, roll it! 507 00:38:17,469 --> 00:38:20,233 - What are we gonna do about this? - Who knows? 508 00:38:56,408 --> 00:38:59,468 - That's a good way to lose the West. - The West is doomed. 509 00:39:15,194 --> 00:39:17,924 There you are, Chief. You want 'em? 510 00:39:19,164 --> 00:39:21,098 Real boss! 511 00:39:21,166 --> 00:39:23,430 Yeah, yeah, we want 'em... 512 00:39:23,502 --> 00:39:25,493 providing you throw in some fringe benefits... 513 00:39:25,571 --> 00:39:29,166 like wagons for the Cheyennes and for the Blackfeet 514 00:39:29,241 --> 00:39:32,301 and all our other allies. 515 00:39:32,378 --> 00:39:35,176 - A fleet deal. - You've got it! 516 00:39:35,247 --> 00:39:38,774 I'll do business with you, but I won't shake hands. 517 00:39:38,851 --> 00:39:41,479 That's it, Pop. No skin. 518 00:40:03,475 --> 00:40:06,569 Those faces. Don't they look like-- 519 00:40:10,716 --> 00:40:13,480 Hey, hey, what are you, a barber or something? 520 00:40:13,552 --> 00:40:17,318 It couldn't be. I blew 'em to bits last night. 521 00:40:23,729 --> 00:40:26,459 - Take it easy! - Welcome to the club. 522 00:41:00,866 --> 00:41:03,767 I tell you, Rance, I seen it with my own eyes. 523 00:41:03,836 --> 00:41:05,770 Cabot's press is going like crazy. 524 00:41:05,838 --> 00:41:07,772 They're turning these things out by the thousands. 525 00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:12,174 I'll tell you something. I've had all I'm gonna take from that nosy tenderfoot. 526 00:41:12,244 --> 00:41:14,337 I don't want that dude in my hair another day. 527 00:41:14,413 --> 00:41:18,941 Now you get him-- front, side or in the back! 528 00:41:19,885 --> 00:41:23,377 Rance, he's as good as dead right now. 529 00:41:23,455 --> 00:41:25,787 You know, they don't call me... 530 00:41:25,858 --> 00:41:28,258 Wyoming's top gun for nothing. 531 00:41:34,933 --> 00:41:37,868 - Hey, Joe, give me the string. - I'm busy. 532 00:41:37,936 --> 00:41:40,404 Joe, put your finger in here. I want to tie a knot. 533 00:41:40,472 --> 00:41:43,305 - I'm busy! - Did I ask for an argument? 534 00:41:43,375 --> 00:41:45,570 Drop everything! 535 00:41:51,483 --> 00:41:53,417 Get your finger in there, and we'll tie that. 536 00:41:53,485 --> 00:41:55,919 Everything you do, you always fracture everything you touch. 537 00:41:55,988 --> 00:41:57,512 I got it, I got it. There you are. 538 00:41:57,589 --> 00:42:00,023 You got it. Every time you got it, I get it. 539 00:42:00,092 --> 00:42:02,185 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 540 00:42:03,729 --> 00:42:05,993 Okay, now we've got exactly ten minutes... 541 00:42:06,065 --> 00:42:08,295 to get these leaflets onto the 4:30 bus. 542 00:42:09,101 --> 00:42:12,593 Give me Mr. Cabot's list to make sure we got all the places he had in mind. 543 00:42:12,671 --> 00:42:16,129 - Comin' up, Moe. - The list. What happened to that list? 544 00:42:16,208 --> 00:42:19,041 - Everything disappears around here. - What happened to the glue? 545 00:42:19,111 --> 00:42:21,636 There's the list right there, Moe, right there. 546 00:42:21,713 --> 00:42:23,874 - There you are, boy. - Okay. 547 00:42:27,786 --> 00:42:30,220 Get my hand off this chair, will ya? 548 00:42:30,289 --> 00:42:32,223 Your hand? 549 00:42:33,258 --> 00:42:36,819 - There you are. - Not that one! The other one! 550 00:42:36,895 --> 00:42:39,295 - What are you doing? - This one! Come on! 551 00:42:39,364 --> 00:42:42,333 Get this table out of the way. Make some room, will ya? 552 00:42:44,970 --> 00:42:47,996 That's the one. What's the matter with you? 553 00:42:49,975 --> 00:42:51,909 There you are. 554 00:42:53,278 --> 00:42:55,542 - Maybe you can get it off. - Get it off. 555 00:42:55,614 --> 00:42:57,844 Yeah, you do it. 556 00:43:00,285 --> 00:43:02,219 You didn't shave your hand today, did you? 557 00:43:02,287 --> 00:43:05,518 - How are you fixed for blades? - I'll show you how I'm fixed for blades! 558 00:43:05,591 --> 00:43:07,752 - Just let me get-- Hey! - What? 559 00:43:07,826 --> 00:43:09,418 - Where'd all this glue come from? - Glue? 560 00:43:09,495 --> 00:43:13,261 - Get me out of this mess! - Wait, wait. 561 00:43:13,332 --> 00:43:15,994 - Get me over here, out of this! - Okay, okay. 562 00:43:16,068 --> 00:43:18,662 Get it off me, fellas, will ya? 563 00:43:18,737 --> 00:43:21,706 I'm tellin' you, get it off! I'll murder ya! 564 00:43:34,453 --> 00:43:36,284 Get the tools! Both of ya! 565 00:43:36,355 --> 00:43:38,289 When I get out of this, I'm gonna save Roden's gang... 566 00:43:38,357 --> 00:43:40,291 the trouble of murdering you guys. 567 00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:44,352 You gonna take all day? Where are the tools? 568 00:43:44,429 --> 00:43:46,363 - Okay, we got the tools. - Hold this. 569 00:43:46,431 --> 00:43:48,661 - You don't have to worry about it. - Here. Right here. 570 00:43:48,734 --> 00:43:51,259 - Right there. - Take it easy now. 571 00:43:51,336 --> 00:43:52,997 Right! 572 00:43:54,106 --> 00:43:55,767 Listen, Larry-- 573 00:43:56,875 --> 00:43:59,036 - What's the matter with ya? - I'm tryin'. 574 00:43:59,111 --> 00:44:01,705 Well, get down there and get the things loose. 575 00:44:04,249 --> 00:44:07,616 - Right there. - All right, up, up, a little more. 576 00:44:07,686 --> 00:44:10,154 That's it. Now the other one. 577 00:44:25,370 --> 00:44:27,895 What's happening? Looks like there's gonna be trouble. 578 00:44:27,973 --> 00:44:31,136 I wouldn't be a bit surprised. 579 00:45:01,940 --> 00:45:05,000 Gee, look what Sheriff Cabot done to Trigger Mortis. 580 00:45:05,077 --> 00:45:08,513 He's even faster than Mr. Dillon! 581 00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:13,279 Wonderful shootin', Sheriff, as usual. Congratulations. 582 00:45:13,352 --> 00:45:16,515 Thank you, Miss Annie. I didn't want to kill the varmint. 583 00:45:16,588 --> 00:45:18,783 Just teach him a lesson. 584 00:45:37,909 --> 00:45:41,276 - That's it. That's it. - Wait. I'll get a chair. Wait! 585 00:45:41,346 --> 00:45:43,075 Get a chair. We're gonna make you comfortable. 586 00:45:43,148 --> 00:45:46,208 - I felt like I was going downhill. - Not with us here! 587 00:45:46,285 --> 00:45:48,549 - There you are. - Sit down. 588 00:45:48,620 --> 00:45:50,611 - Boy, I'm tickled to death. - Boy! 589 00:45:50,689 --> 00:45:53,351 - Man, you guys are really friends. - We're your buddies. 590 00:45:53,425 --> 00:45:55,416 We just-- Oh, no. 591 00:45:57,996 --> 00:46:01,659 - Crowbar! - Get me out of here! I wanna kill ya! 592 00:46:01,733 --> 00:46:03,667 - Help me out! I wanna kill ya! - Okay, we'll get ya. 593 00:46:03,735 --> 00:46:06,636 Help me! Watch it! 594 00:46:06,705 --> 00:46:09,174 Watch where you're sticking those handles. Take it easy! 595 00:46:09,174 --> 00:46:09,731 Watch where you're sticking those handles. Take it easy! 596 00:46:09,808 --> 00:46:12,675 But, Rance, it was like he had eyes in the back of his head. 597 00:46:12,744 --> 00:46:14,712 Just as I whip out my gun-- Wham! 598 00:46:14,780 --> 00:46:17,374 He turns around and gives it to me! 599 00:46:17,449 --> 00:46:20,418 - The top gun in Wyoming. - But, Rance, I had him dead-- 600 00:46:20,485 --> 00:46:23,010 Aw, shut up! 601 00:46:23,088 --> 00:46:26,285 Local talent. It's about time we called in the pros. 602 00:46:26,358 --> 00:46:28,724 Now, where are the telegraph blanks? 603 00:46:28,794 --> 00:46:31,285 There. 604 00:46:31,363 --> 00:46:34,958 "Bat Masterson, Dodge City." 605 00:46:50,382 --> 00:46:53,317 That's for being too lazy to deliver it. 606 00:46:53,385 --> 00:46:56,252 "Sheriff Cabot. Fastest gun ever. 607 00:46:56,321 --> 00:47:00,724 Rush to Casper. Urgent. Roden." 608 00:47:00,792 --> 00:47:03,056 Fastest gun ever? 609 00:47:03,128 --> 00:47:07,030 Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fastest gun of all? 610 00:47:07,099 --> 00:47:11,001 Jesse James,you was best till this new boy came out west. 611 00:47:11,069 --> 00:47:13,162 That's a lie! 612 00:47:25,684 --> 00:47:30,178 That's what us ladies think of sheriffs! 613 00:47:30,255 --> 00:47:33,156 Oh, Ringo! 614 00:47:37,362 --> 00:47:41,093 That'll teach ya to interrupt when I'm swoonin' the gals. 615 00:47:51,476 --> 00:47:54,536 Man, he's a real swinger! 616 00:47:57,482 --> 00:48:02,146 Sorry I can't take it all today. I got important business in Wyoming. 617 00:48:05,590 --> 00:48:07,581 Tote that barge. Swish that broom. 618 00:48:07,659 --> 00:48:10,594 Get that rubbish up. I'll fracture your skull. 619 00:48:10,662 --> 00:48:13,290 And you, lamebrain, turn that basket up the right way. 620 00:48:13,365 --> 00:48:15,629 lf I do, somebody will put rubbish in it. 621 00:48:15,700 --> 00:48:19,192 Well, that's the general idea. Come on here! 622 00:48:19,271 --> 00:48:22,297 - Oh, hi! - Where's the sheriff? 623 00:48:22,374 --> 00:48:24,968 He went down to the post office to make a report to Boston. 624 00:48:25,043 --> 00:48:26,635 - Why? What's up? - Plenty. 625 00:48:26,711 --> 00:48:29,646 I hear Rance Roden has sent for his gunslingers to get Mr. Cabot... 626 00:48:29,714 --> 00:48:32,512 and that's nine of the meanest, orneriest galoots... 627 00:48:32,584 --> 00:48:34,051 who ever cheated the gallows. 628 00:48:34,119 --> 00:48:36,280 And every one, a dead shot. 629 00:48:36,354 --> 00:48:38,720 - Did you say nine? - Nine. Due in tonight. 630 00:48:38,790 --> 00:48:41,224 And how we're gonna handle all of them at once... 631 00:48:41,293 --> 00:48:43,488 is really gonna be something of a problem. 632 00:48:43,562 --> 00:48:45,325 What about Fort Henderson? 633 00:48:45,397 --> 00:48:48,491 The news is bad. The cavalry ain't comin'. 634 00:48:48,567 --> 00:48:51,900 Yeah. The colonel's daughter ran off with a traveling salesman from St.Joe. 635 00:48:51,970 --> 00:48:54,996 And he's got all the soldiers out lookin' for them. 636 00:48:56,441 --> 00:49:00,707 Well, I guess the best we can do now is... pray for a miracle. 637 00:49:01,446 --> 00:49:03,539 Well, don't worry about it, Annie. 638 00:49:03,615 --> 00:49:05,606 - We'll think of somethin'. - Yeah, we'll think of somethin'. 639 00:49:05,684 --> 00:49:08,209 We always do, don't we? 640 00:49:08,286 --> 00:49:11,221 Why, certainly we do. Fellas, look. 641 00:49:11,289 --> 00:49:14,156 In a couple of days, we'll be laughing at this whole thing... 642 00:49:14,226 --> 00:49:16,558 thinking how silly it was for us to worry. 643 00:49:16,628 --> 00:49:18,755 Laughin', you hear? Laughin'. 644 00:49:20,899 --> 00:49:22,867 Laughin', Moe! 645 00:49:27,506 --> 00:49:29,838 At a time like this, you're laughing? 646 00:49:29,908 --> 00:49:31,842 - What's the matter with you? - Nine gunslingers! 647 00:49:31,910 --> 00:49:33,844 - Serious, this is. - Dead shots! 648 00:49:33,912 --> 00:49:37,006 All right, all right, shut up. I'm worryin'. 649 00:49:52,898 --> 00:49:54,832 Disguise. 650 00:49:56,268 --> 00:49:58,862 You guys sure that that batch is as strong as the last one? 651 00:49:58,937 --> 00:50:01,030 Stick your finger in there and see for yourself. 652 00:50:01,106 --> 00:50:04,872 - You'll never get it out again. - Okay. Now, remember... 653 00:50:04,943 --> 00:50:07,810 Annie told us that the gunslingers are all in sample room six. 654 00:50:07,879 --> 00:50:08,937 Six. 655 00:50:12,817 --> 00:50:15,251 We really packed 'em in for the opening tonight. 656 00:50:15,320 --> 00:50:18,153 The show ought to have a good long run here. 657 00:50:49,454 --> 00:50:52,184 - Here it is, six. - Yeah. Number six. 658 00:50:52,257 --> 00:50:54,555 - Let's go. - Sh. 659 00:50:56,394 --> 00:50:58,453 Quiet, you guys. 660 00:50:58,530 --> 00:51:02,489 Okay, never mind. I'd rather do it myself. 661 00:51:08,073 --> 00:51:10,473 - Where's Moe? - Chickened out. 662 00:51:10,542 --> 00:51:12,840 We'll do it ourselves. 663 00:51:46,244 --> 00:51:48,235 A gun belt. 664 00:51:52,350 --> 00:51:55,114 I never saw one like that before. 665 00:52:20,945 --> 00:52:23,971 There must be a gun belt here someplace. 666 00:52:27,118 --> 00:52:29,416 Don't do that! 667 00:52:29,487 --> 00:52:33,048 - Did you find a gun? - Only this derringer. 668 00:52:33,124 --> 00:52:36,924 Derringer? That's a curling iron, you chowderhead. 669 00:52:36,995 --> 00:52:38,929 It must belong to Wild Bill Hickok. 670 00:52:38,997 --> 00:52:41,295 He wears his hair down to there. 671 00:52:41,366 --> 00:52:43,391 Yeah. That's probably why he's wild. 672 00:52:47,806 --> 00:52:49,296 Don't shoot. 673 00:53:01,853 --> 00:53:03,787 I can see he don't use this for walking. 674 00:53:08,693 --> 00:53:11,184 Come on, baby. Come on, baby. 675 00:54:26,604 --> 00:54:29,164 Oh, that Hickok. 676 00:54:29,240 --> 00:54:32,869 - Did you find anything? - Only a pair of mules. 677 00:54:32,944 --> 00:54:35,344 How did he get 'em past the room clerk? 678 00:54:35,413 --> 00:54:36,971 Not those-- 679 00:54:39,818 --> 00:54:43,515 Jane, darlin'. 680 00:54:43,588 --> 00:54:47,080 I didn't know you cared. 681 00:55:01,072 --> 00:55:06,442 - Darling. - Can I call you... Calamity? 682 00:55:06,511 --> 00:55:10,572 Comes tomorrow morning, you'll call me worse than that. 683 00:55:10,648 --> 00:55:14,516 - I know why we haven't found any guns. - Why? 684 00:55:14,586 --> 00:55:18,044 - We've been looking in the wrong places. - We have? 685 00:55:18,122 --> 00:55:21,285 These guys carry their guns on their hips. 686 00:55:45,917 --> 00:55:48,283 I think you're wrong, Joe. Let's try the closet. 687 00:56:14,746 --> 00:56:17,510 Wake up! I heard a noise. 688 00:56:17,582 --> 00:56:19,516 Somebody's in this room. 689 00:56:20,685 --> 00:56:23,882 I think we made a boo-boo 690 00:56:52,050 --> 00:56:55,747 There's a prowler in here. I know there is. 691 00:56:55,820 --> 00:56:57,845 I think he's in there. 692 00:56:59,123 --> 00:57:01,648 There's no one in there, dearie. We just looked. 693 00:57:01,726 --> 00:57:03,591 You must have had a terrible nightmare. 694 00:57:03,661 --> 00:57:07,597 Yes. Whenever you have sauerkraut and lobster-- happens every time. 695 00:57:07,665 --> 00:57:09,599 Coming, Catherine? 696 00:57:09,667 --> 00:57:11,897 Catherine, come on. 697 00:57:11,970 --> 00:57:14,063 So long. I'll be seeing you. 698 00:57:18,242 --> 00:57:21,177 - Pardon me, madam. - Think nothing of it, Moe. 699 00:57:25,750 --> 00:57:28,776 - Come on, get out of here. - Leave me alone with those killers! 700 00:57:28,853 --> 00:57:31,413 Come on, come on. Get goin'. Come on. 701 00:57:58,549 --> 00:58:00,847 Hey, Moe, here they come. 702 00:58:00,918 --> 00:58:03,182 Well, they'll be sorry. 703 00:58:03,254 --> 00:58:05,188 Get that over there. How do you feel? 704 00:58:06,491 --> 00:58:11,758 Oh, fine. I mean, Annie told me this morning... 705 00:58:11,829 --> 00:58:15,060 - there was nothing to worry about. - That should settle it. 706 00:58:16,534 --> 00:58:18,934 Well, I guess we better get it over with. 707 00:58:19,003 --> 00:58:21,233 Yes, I guess we better. Let's go. 708 00:58:23,341 --> 00:58:27,175 Bein' as I got to town first, boys, he's my pigeon. 709 00:58:27,245 --> 00:58:30,237 - Fair enough, Cole. - Here he comes. 710 00:58:48,599 --> 00:58:52,365 Hold still! Hold still, Annie. No tricks. Hands off the gun. 711 00:59:20,698 --> 00:59:23,326 - It works! It works! - Now's your chance, Mr. Cabot! 712 00:59:23,401 --> 00:59:26,097 Fan your gun! Fan your gun! 713 00:59:32,110 --> 00:59:34,305 Let 'em have it, Mr. Cabot! Shoot! Shoot! 714 01:00:01,639 --> 01:00:03,766 You'll hear about me! 715 01:00:04,742 --> 01:00:07,734 Let somebody draw that knows how. 716 01:00:39,744 --> 01:00:43,271 All right! Now not another move. 717 01:00:50,555 --> 01:00:52,546 That smarts. 718 01:00:53,724 --> 01:00:56,386 Go see a chiropodist, buddy. 719 01:00:56,460 --> 01:00:58,758 Let's see you get out of this. 720 01:01:10,208 --> 01:01:12,608 Pretty good, eh? Come on. 721 01:01:19,283 --> 01:01:23,652 Attaboy, Mr. Cabot. You're still the fastest gun in Casper. 722 01:01:23,721 --> 01:01:25,712 That'll teach 'em not to mess around with a Harvard man. 723 01:01:25,790 --> 01:01:29,453 Yeah, or us. Come on, fellas. Let's clean it up. 724 01:01:54,785 --> 01:01:57,117 Better late than never, Sheriff Cabot. 725 01:01:57,188 --> 01:02:00,555 - Who are you? - Wild Bill Hickok. 726 01:02:00,625 --> 01:02:03,389 And the lady is Belle Star. 727 01:02:05,363 --> 01:02:09,197 I got 19 notches in my gun, Sheriff... 728 01:02:09,267 --> 01:02:11,827 and you'll make it an even 20. 729 01:02:12,970 --> 01:02:15,996 I never kill from this close. 730 01:02:21,946 --> 01:02:24,176 Get 'im, Bill. 731 01:02:30,588 --> 01:02:33,614 Can't keep a lady waitin', Sheriff. 732 01:02:33,691 --> 01:02:35,181 Draw. 733 01:02:50,908 --> 01:02:52,899 You won't get off so lucky, this time, Sheriff. 734 01:02:52,977 --> 01:02:55,741 - Ken, wait! - Annie Oakley? 735 01:02:55,813 --> 01:02:58,281 It don't look good for you to tackle a woman. 736 01:02:58,349 --> 01:03:00,340 This one's mine. 737 01:03:00,418 --> 01:03:02,579 Suits me, Annie, but the sheriff's first. 738 01:03:09,694 --> 01:03:11,753 Why, you-- 739 01:03:40,291 --> 01:03:42,282 You heard what I been tellin' ya? 740 01:03:42,360 --> 01:03:44,419 All right. You sorry for what you done? 741 01:03:46,464 --> 01:03:48,955 Boys, make 'em sorry for what they done. 742 01:03:53,838 --> 01:03:55,829 We're sorry for what we done! 743 01:03:55,906 --> 01:03:57,965 Now, that's more like it. 744 01:03:58,042 --> 01:04:00,408 Boys, we got a rat right here in Casper City with a capital R 745 01:04:00,478 --> 01:04:02,912 And that stands for rotten and that rhymes with Roden 746 01:04:02,980 --> 01:04:05,972 - Yeah, a rotten Roden rat. - With a capital R. 747 01:04:06,050 --> 01:04:08,951 Yeah, we got a rat right here in Casper City 748 01:04:09,019 --> 01:04:10,509 With a capital R 749 01:04:10,588 --> 01:04:13,352 That stands for rotten and that rhymes with Roden 750 01:04:13,424 --> 01:04:16,359 - Now, that's more like it. - Hey, there's another one. 751 01:04:16,427 --> 01:04:19,294 Bring the brother in. Join the flock, brother. Hallelujah. Yes, sir. 752 01:04:19,363 --> 01:04:22,025 I wanna go home. I wanna go home! 753 01:04:22,099 --> 01:04:25,034 - He wants to go home. - Shut up, you crybaby! 754 01:04:25,102 --> 01:04:26,592 There. 755 01:04:43,921 --> 01:04:46,856 Now,you do say huntin'buffalo's an awful sin 756 01:04:46,924 --> 01:04:50,485 Yeah, we say huntin'buffalo's an awful sin 757 01:04:50,561 --> 01:04:52,859 Good-bye, crime Hello, law and order 758 01:04:52,930 --> 01:04:56,229 Good-bye, crime Hello, law and order 759 01:04:56,300 --> 01:04:58,734 You through with Rance Roden? 760 01:05:00,137 --> 01:05:02,469 I didn't hear nothin', brother. 761 01:05:05,643 --> 01:05:07,133 Yeah, yeah! 762 01:05:07,211 --> 01:05:10,806 Yea, brother,yea We're through with Rance Roden 763 01:05:39,510 --> 01:05:41,501 I want my Bill! 764 01:05:44,014 --> 01:05:46,505 You poor lamb. Where'd she get you? 765 01:05:48,152 --> 01:05:50,143 I don't see no bullet holes. 766 01:05:51,288 --> 01:05:53,279 Where are they? 767 01:05:54,258 --> 01:05:57,989 Well, I'm not really wounded, Annie. 768 01:05:58,062 --> 01:06:01,589 I... just passed out. 769 01:06:01,665 --> 01:06:03,656 Passed out? 770 01:06:05,102 --> 01:06:08,162 Of all the no-account, spineless... 771 01:06:08,239 --> 01:06:10,230 jellyfish. 772 01:06:12,510 --> 01:06:15,638 From now on, you can do your own shootin'. 773 01:06:18,249 --> 01:06:20,740 Do my own shootin'? 774 01:06:20,818 --> 01:06:23,150 Believe me, fellas, if you take the straight and narrow... 775 01:06:23,220 --> 01:06:25,745 kids all over the world will look up to you. 776 01:06:25,823 --> 01:06:28,053 When we get back to Boston, we'll print picture books about you... 777 01:06:28,125 --> 01:06:30,184 with songs and stories. 778 01:06:30,261 --> 01:06:33,094 Your names will live forever. You may even get into TV. 779 01:06:33,163 --> 01:06:34,653 I'm sold! 780 01:06:34,732 --> 01:06:37,565 Listen, right now Trigger and Roden are up in Bald Knob... 781 01:06:37,635 --> 01:06:40,069 selling guns and ammunition to the lndians. 782 01:06:40,137 --> 01:06:42,970 They're gonna start a full-scale attack by daybreak. 783 01:06:43,040 --> 01:06:45,406 All right. You wanna make up for what you done? 784 01:06:47,177 --> 01:06:48,906 Saddle up and find the cavalry. 785 01:06:48,979 --> 01:06:51,948 Let's go, boys! Let's show 'em we've really reformed. 786 01:06:52,016 --> 01:06:54,007 - We've reformed! - Let's show 'em! 787 01:06:57,755 --> 01:07:00,622 If we could only get a picture showing Roden selling guns to the lndians... 788 01:07:00,691 --> 01:07:03,353 that would bring the whole United States government down on his neck-- 789 01:07:03,427 --> 01:07:06,692 End the buffalo war and put him in the clink with the rest of the rodents. 790 01:07:06,764 --> 01:07:08,254 That's with a capital R. 791 01:07:08,332 --> 01:07:10,357 I got a camera. What are we waitin' for? 792 01:07:10,434 --> 01:07:12,834 We're waitin' for ya to get it, you mongoose! 793 01:07:12,903 --> 01:07:15,394 - Is that with a capital M? - No, that's with a capital Gun. 794 01:07:15,472 --> 01:07:17,463 Come on. Come on. 795 01:07:23,147 --> 01:07:27,106 - I'm sorry, Larry. - Mr. Cabot, what's wrong? 796 01:07:27,184 --> 01:07:28,845 Boys... 797 01:07:28,919 --> 01:07:32,320 I've decided to close up shop and go back to Boston. 798 01:07:32,389 --> 01:07:34,448 What? 799 01:07:34,525 --> 01:07:36,516 I've been a fool. 800 01:07:36,594 --> 01:07:39,927 I know that Annie did all the shooting for me and-- 801 01:07:39,997 --> 01:07:42,261 Well, now she won't even talk to me. 802 01:07:42,333 --> 01:07:45,564 - But you can't quit now. - There's something wrong at Bald Knob. 803 01:07:45,636 --> 01:07:47,627 We'll tell you about it on the way over. Come on. 804 01:07:47,705 --> 01:07:50,367 We'll tell you all about it on the way over. 805 01:08:14,632 --> 01:08:18,762 As General Custer said, "Look at all them fightin' lndians." 806 01:08:18,836 --> 01:08:21,236 What are they, Blackfeet? 807 01:08:21,305 --> 01:08:23,296 I can't see their feet... 808 01:08:23,374 --> 01:08:25,604 but the rest of'em don't look too clean. 809 01:08:25,676 --> 01:08:27,871 With guns and thunder wagon... 810 01:08:27,945 --> 01:08:31,540 great chief will mow down enemies like ripe grain before the wind. 811 01:08:31,615 --> 01:08:34,209 Cool it, pale daddy. We dig the setup. 812 01:08:34,284 --> 01:08:37,276 We don't wanna go through that lndian jazz again. 813 01:08:38,856 --> 01:08:42,451 - What's the matter now? - I think the chief's got a beef. 814 01:08:42,526 --> 01:08:45,825 My papa says, since we're payin' for this thing in cash... 815 01:08:45,896 --> 01:08:47,887 we want a ten percent discount. 816 01:08:47,965 --> 01:08:50,058 - Huh? - You "wantum" wampum... 817 01:08:50,134 --> 01:08:52,364 you "cutum pricem." 818 01:08:52,436 --> 01:08:54,427 You got a deal. 819 01:09:02,112 --> 01:09:06,310 Boy, somethin' tells me we're gonna make history with this. 820 01:09:14,792 --> 01:09:16,783 Here's your loot. 821 01:09:16,860 --> 01:09:18,885 Are you ready? 822 01:09:18,962 --> 01:09:20,554 Say "cheese." 823 01:09:20,631 --> 01:09:22,997 Boys, this is gonna be dynamite. 824 01:09:33,744 --> 01:09:36,736 What are you waitin' for? Can't you see they're paleface spies? 825 01:09:39,683 --> 01:09:41,674 Where's Larry? 826 01:09:44,655 --> 01:09:46,953 Hey, what's goin' on here? 827 01:09:47,024 --> 01:09:49,015 You sure you don't wanna-- 828 01:09:49,093 --> 01:09:52,688 Take it easy. I see stripes are in style this season. 829 01:09:53,897 --> 01:09:55,888 Greasy kid stuff, Moe. 830 01:09:55,966 --> 01:09:59,458 - All right, all right. - Easy. Easy. 831 01:10:11,915 --> 01:10:15,476 One, two, three, four-- 832 01:10:16,653 --> 01:10:19,144 What comes after four? Oh, that's enough. 833 01:10:28,866 --> 01:10:30,356 Perfect. 834 01:10:39,777 --> 01:10:42,041 Hi. Have you heard the story... 835 01:10:42,112 --> 01:10:44,876 about the elephant and the little mouse-- 836 01:10:44,948 --> 01:10:47,746 What are ya, a bouncer or something? Take it easy. 837 01:10:47,818 --> 01:10:49,911 I'll get myself a cheap lawyer. 838 01:10:49,987 --> 01:10:51,921 End of the line, Sheriff. 839 01:10:53,457 --> 01:10:56,915 Here comes the fourth one. It's a clean sweep. 840 01:11:03,100 --> 01:11:05,591 That's a devil box, Chief. There's an evil spirit inside... 841 01:11:05,669 --> 01:11:07,830 that'll curse your tribe, and they'll lose in battle. 842 01:11:07,905 --> 01:11:09,395 Kill it. 843 01:11:12,643 --> 01:11:15,271 That's a neat idea, boys. Too bad it didn't work. 844 01:11:15,345 --> 01:11:19,679 You renegades! You'll regret this. 845 01:11:19,750 --> 01:11:22,048 So will you. 846 01:11:22,853 --> 01:11:24,844 I don't know how you got away from my gunslingers... 847 01:11:24,922 --> 01:11:26,913 but you're gonna wish they killed you first. 848 01:11:26,990 --> 01:11:30,357 Now you're gonna get it the slow way-- over hot coals. 849 01:11:33,297 --> 01:11:36,789 Wait a minute! We'd rather you hang us to that tree. 850 01:11:39,436 --> 01:11:42,405 Why, that tree won't be ready for 60 years. 851 01:11:42,472 --> 01:11:43,962 We'll wait. 852 01:11:50,113 --> 01:11:52,547 Make the fat one medium rare. 853 01:11:52,616 --> 01:11:57,053 I gotta get goin', Trigger, but you stick around and make sure they-- 854 01:11:57,120 --> 01:11:59,748 This will be a pleasure, Mr. Roden. 855 01:12:00,757 --> 01:12:02,748 So long. Happy hunting, Chief. 856 01:12:05,195 --> 01:12:06,685 Charlie. 857 01:12:08,065 --> 01:12:10,056 Make smoke signals to start the war. 858 01:12:10,133 --> 01:12:12,863 You bet, Pop. Comin' up. 859 01:12:12,936 --> 01:12:16,463 No hanky-panky with that Pawnee chick on the other side of the valley. 860 01:12:16,540 --> 01:12:20,203 You can trust me, Pop. That Pawnee's too scrawny. 861 01:12:26,149 --> 01:12:29,812 Hey, Zsa Zsa, you knittin' or just sittin'? 862 01:12:29,887 --> 01:12:32,685 Get on with the message, bigmouth. 863 01:14:52,329 --> 01:14:54,320 My son, the doctor. 864 01:14:58,402 --> 01:15:00,768 Hey, watch it, Kildare. 865 01:15:00,837 --> 01:15:04,500 Chief, we're wastin' time. Let's get this over with. 866 01:15:04,574 --> 01:15:07,304 Chief, he's the one who's been killing your buffalo. 867 01:15:07,377 --> 01:15:10,972 Now they're trying to stir up a war so they can get rich selling you guns. 868 01:15:11,048 --> 01:15:14,245 Boy, is that ever a pile of-- 869 01:15:14,317 --> 01:15:17,081 Lies. Lies. 870 01:15:17,154 --> 01:15:20,385 They spy for paleface enemies. 871 01:15:20,457 --> 01:15:22,687 All our buffalo destroyed. 872 01:15:22,759 --> 01:15:25,159 Now all white men die. 873 01:15:26,963 --> 01:15:28,954 Moe, the horn. The horn. 874 01:15:29,032 --> 01:15:32,263 - Hey, the horn. - Hey, Chief, he's got the magic flute. 875 01:15:32,335 --> 01:15:36,635 I can make the Great Spirit bring your buffalo back. 876 01:15:38,708 --> 01:15:40,699 He speaks the truth, Chief. 877 01:15:40,777 --> 01:15:43,007 He's bullin' ya, Chief. He's bullin' ya. 878 01:15:43,080 --> 01:15:45,310 And he's stallin'. Don't listen to him. 879 01:15:45,382 --> 01:15:48,818 I can. Well, if you turn me loose. 880 01:15:48,885 --> 01:15:52,548 I can't play a flute with my hands tied, can I? 881 01:15:55,692 --> 01:15:57,683 Untie him. 882 01:16:10,273 --> 01:16:12,264 Let me see, what was that? 883 01:16:12,342 --> 01:16:16,870 Did I play a slow pizzicato, or was it a fast obbligato? 884 01:16:16,947 --> 01:16:18,938 I got it. 885 01:16:33,897 --> 01:16:36,388 I don't see buffalo. 886 01:16:36,466 --> 01:16:39,026 Because there ain't no buffalo! 887 01:16:39,102 --> 01:16:41,093 Now let's get on with the burning. 888 01:16:42,839 --> 01:16:46,639 Wait a minute. He was only tuning up. 889 01:16:46,710 --> 01:16:48,769 Now remember that tune. Get some buffalo... 890 01:16:48,845 --> 01:16:50,938 or I'll give you worse than a hotfoot. 891 01:16:51,014 --> 01:16:53,005 - Okay. Give me an A. - A. 892 01:17:11,034 --> 01:17:14,197 Nothing. We're wasting time. 893 01:17:14,271 --> 01:17:16,603 Doctor, light the fire. 894 01:17:17,874 --> 01:17:20,604 - Hey, hey, hey! - Get outta there. 895 01:17:20,677 --> 01:17:24,113 Get away. Go away, you ugly pyromaniac. 896 01:17:24,181 --> 01:17:26,877 I got one more chance. One more chance, Chief. 897 01:17:27,551 --> 01:17:30,281 One more chance, Moe. 898 01:17:42,966 --> 01:17:44,957 Holy cows! 899 01:18:03,153 --> 01:18:05,849 I'm a success! Moe, I'm a success! 900 01:18:23,073 --> 01:18:25,064 Untie them. 901 01:18:27,077 --> 01:18:28,942 I did it! I'm a success! 902 01:18:29,679 --> 01:18:32,273 Make smoke, Charlie. Call off war. 903 01:18:32,349 --> 01:18:34,579 Papa, you're always pickin' on me. 904 01:18:34,651 --> 01:18:37,586 Why don't you send your son, the doctor? 905 01:18:37,654 --> 01:18:39,144 Roger! 906 01:18:42,826 --> 01:18:46,455 My instant photo. I took it before they smashed the camera. 907 01:18:46,529 --> 01:18:49,191 Oh, boy. Wait till the government gets a load of this. 908 01:18:56,539 --> 01:18:58,530 He's gettin' away! 909 01:19:01,978 --> 01:19:03,468 Go get 'im! 910 01:19:10,253 --> 01:19:12,448 The quicker we turn that photo over to the authorities... 911 01:19:12,522 --> 01:19:15,286 the sooner law and order will be restored in the West. 912 01:19:15,358 --> 01:19:17,485 Well, Chief, we gotta get goin' back to Casper. 913 01:19:17,560 --> 01:19:20,791 Hey. It's a long walk back to Casper. 914 01:19:20,864 --> 01:19:24,994 Go ahead and take that chuck wagon we got from the cavalry. 915 01:19:25,068 --> 01:19:27,036 That'll be fine. 916 01:19:27,103 --> 01:19:30,334 Return it to the army, please. 917 01:19:30,407 --> 01:19:32,637 Tell them we took it by mistake. 918 01:19:34,678 --> 01:19:36,168 Thanks, Chief. 919 01:19:36,246 --> 01:19:38,544 - Bye, Chief. - Bye-bye. 920 01:19:38,615 --> 01:19:41,015 - You got a bad bunch of dancers. - So long. 921 01:19:41,084 --> 01:19:43,609 So long, Chief, and this is yours. 922 01:19:43,687 --> 01:19:45,848 I won't need that back in Boston. 923 01:19:48,224 --> 01:19:49,885 No need to worry now, Son. 924 01:19:49,959 --> 01:19:51,950 You said it, "Paparooni". 925 01:19:52,028 --> 01:19:54,019 Why, with that swingin' tooter... 926 01:19:54,097 --> 01:19:56,657 we'll have two buffalo in every teepee. 927 01:19:58,034 --> 01:20:01,697 - Give me an A. -A 928 01:20:16,019 --> 01:20:19,455 - Where do you think you're goin'? - Anyplace the afternoon stage will take me. 929 01:20:19,522 --> 01:20:23,049 No, you're not. Nobody walks out on me, not even Annie Oakley. 930 01:20:23,126 --> 01:20:26,687 Rance. Cabot's got a photo of us selling them rifles to the lndians. 931 01:20:26,763 --> 01:20:28,754 They're probably on their way to town right now. 932 01:20:28,832 --> 01:20:31,824 We've got to intercept them and get that photo, or we're as good as strung up. 933 01:20:31,901 --> 01:20:35,632 - They were all supposed to be dead by now. - They bamboozled their way out. 934 01:20:35,705 --> 01:20:39,402 - We've got to get that photo. - We'll get that photo and them too. 935 01:20:39,476 --> 01:20:41,603 No, you don't. You're not warning anybody. 936 01:20:41,678 --> 01:20:43,669 You're going with me. 937 01:20:49,085 --> 01:20:52,521 Well, as soon as we turn that picture over to the authorities... 938 01:20:52,589 --> 01:20:54,682 we'll be headed back to Boston. 939 01:20:54,758 --> 01:20:56,749 Our work here is finished. 940 01:20:56,826 --> 01:20:59,954 - What about Annie? - Well, I-- 941 01:21:01,564 --> 01:21:04,158 - What happened? - Hey, boys! 942 01:21:06,269 --> 01:21:07,998 Get us outta here! 943 01:21:36,633 --> 01:21:39,966 Okay, kid. Get that up here. 944 01:21:40,036 --> 01:21:41,799 Get 'em! 945 01:21:44,374 --> 01:21:48,003 I'll blow that carriage right out from underneath them. 946 01:21:55,251 --> 01:21:58,550 How do you like that? At a time like this, a flat tire. 947 01:22:05,428 --> 01:22:07,419 Look out! Get that gun inside. 948 01:22:16,172 --> 01:22:18,868 It's Trigger and Roden, and they got Annie with them. 949 01:22:45,535 --> 01:22:47,765 - Battle stations! - Battle stations! 950 01:22:57,380 --> 01:22:59,575 - Get your head outta the way! - I'm not the enemy! 951 01:23:13,396 --> 01:23:15,728 - Heavy artillery! - Heavy artillery! 952 01:23:23,673 --> 01:23:25,334 Right on the schnoz. 953 01:23:26,809 --> 01:23:28,743 - Look out now. - Get 'em, Moe. 954 01:23:28,811 --> 01:23:31,575 - What's the matter with you? - Watch what you're doin'. 955 01:23:33,516 --> 01:23:35,006 Why, you-- 956 01:23:40,456 --> 01:23:42,447 Why don't you get outta the way! 957 01:23:42,525 --> 01:23:44,516 There you are. Get 'im. Get Trigger. 958 01:23:56,539 --> 01:23:58,632 Whoa. 959 01:24:08,484 --> 01:24:11,544 If we only had a gun to give him cover. 960 01:24:16,292 --> 01:24:18,817 He's liable to get killed out there. 961 01:24:18,895 --> 01:24:20,886 Hey, Moe, the meat grinder. 962 01:24:22,465 --> 01:24:24,160 Get out of there, Annie. 963 01:24:41,918 --> 01:24:45,285 What a whack in the jaw! Come on, boys. 964 01:25:19,756 --> 01:25:21,781 Take it easy. What happened? 965 01:25:21,858 --> 01:25:23,348 All right. 966 01:25:28,798 --> 01:25:30,766 Good boy! 967 01:25:40,276 --> 01:25:42,301 Give 'im an upper shoot! 968 01:26:06,836 --> 01:26:09,999 Here they come, late as usual. 969 01:26:10,073 --> 01:26:12,633 Over there. Go ahead. Right over there. Come on. 970 01:26:17,080 --> 01:26:19,742 Come on! Get over there. Come on. Right there. 971 01:26:20,450 --> 01:26:23,351 Sixth United States Cavalry, sir. At your service. 972 01:26:23,419 --> 01:26:26,582 For a while, Colonel, we thought you were gonna be late. 973 01:26:26,656 --> 01:26:29,090 Sir! Never in the history of motion pictures... 974 01:26:29,158 --> 01:26:31,683 has the United States Cavalry ever been late. 975 01:26:31,761 --> 01:26:33,285 I'll betcha. 976 01:26:33,362 --> 01:26:35,523 Did you hear what he said? 977 01:26:35,598 --> 01:26:37,793 Never mind. 978 01:26:37,867 --> 01:26:41,098 Well, at any rate, there's a couple of prisoners there... 979 01:26:41,170 --> 01:26:43,297 and you'd better not be late with them. 980 01:26:43,372 --> 01:26:46,466 - No, sir. - That'll be all, mustache. 981 01:26:47,877 --> 01:26:49,868 I wish I had a camera. 982 01:26:59,489 --> 01:27:03,186 Boys! You look great. That's the way we like to see you. 983 01:27:03,259 --> 01:27:07,355 - So long, fellas. Be good. - Don't forget what we told ya. 984 01:27:07,430 --> 01:27:10,661 Good-bye, crime! Hello, law and order! 985 01:27:10,733 --> 01:27:12,724 - See ya, Wyatt. - So long, Bat. 986 01:27:12,802 --> 01:27:15,862 So long there, boy. Take care of yourself. 987 01:27:15,938 --> 01:27:18,907 Good-bye,crime. Hello, law and order. 988 01:27:18,975 --> 01:27:22,138 Good-bye, crime. Hello, law and order. 989 01:27:25,982 --> 01:27:27,973 Hey, fellas. 990 01:27:28,050 --> 01:27:30,450 Just like in the big-budget westerns... 991 01:27:30,520 --> 01:27:33,011 we're gonna get to ride off into the sunset. 992 01:27:36,626 --> 01:27:40,118 Sunset, huh? You had to open your big fat mouth. 993 01:27:43,065 --> 01:27:45,533 Come on, fellas. I thought that-- 994 01:27:45,601 --> 01:27:47,967 Wait a minute. Wait for me. 995 01:27:48,967 --> 01:27:58,967 Downloaded From www.AllSubs.org 78278

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