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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,139 --> 00:00:10,110 Dave, what are we doing in this ritzy store? 2 00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:14,013 Smells like trust funds and white-collar crime in here. 3 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:14,881 I know, 4 00:00:14,948 --> 00:00:15,882 but I need some new shirts for work, 5 00:00:15,949 --> 00:00:19,052 and Haberdashery L.A. is the hot new place. 6 00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:20,620 They say it's for the modern, 7 00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:22,455 yet classic gentleman. 8 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:24,391 Then what are you doing here? 9 00:00:26,493 --> 00:00:28,228 Calvin, what about this? 10 00:00:28,294 --> 00:00:32,165 I love the story that hat is telling on you. 11 00:00:32,232 --> 00:00:33,800 I saw the price of that. 12 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,735 Is the moral of the story bankruptcy? 13 00:00:35,802 --> 00:00:37,704 (laughs) 14 00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:39,272 Oh, I like this guy. 15 00:00:39,339 --> 00:00:41,641 Would you two care for some complimentary 16 00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,510 small-batch bourbon while you shop? 17 00:00:43,576 --> 00:00:45,145 I like this guy. 18 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,514 Complimentary is my favorite brand. 19 00:00:50,583 --> 00:00:51,718 Thank you. 20 00:00:50,583 --> 00:00:51,718 Mm-hmm. 21 00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:55,288 (sniffs) Ooh, oaky, yet peppery. 22 00:00:55,355 --> 00:00:58,258 Am I sensing some notes of burnt caramel? 23 00:00:58,324 --> 00:01:00,293 Dave, I would take you more seriously 24 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:01,661 if I didn't see you drinking 25 00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:03,430 a box of chocolate milk this morning. 26 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:08,368 You know what would look amazing on you? 27 00:01:08,435 --> 00:01:10,470 This jacket. 28 00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:13,440 Ooh! That is a nice jacket. 29 00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:13,440 Mm-hmm. 30 00:01:13,506 --> 00:01:15,475 Oh, you know what? Calvin, you should try that on. 31 00:01:15,542 --> 00:01:18,378 Is it complimentary to try on? 32 00:01:18,445 --> 00:01:20,814 As long as you stay in the store. 33 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:22,115 (chuckles) Hey. 34 00:01:23,450 --> 00:01:25,652 Okay. Yeah. 35 00:01:25,718 --> 00:01:28,488 Yeah, that's nice right there. 36 00:01:25,718 --> 00:01:28,488 All right. 37 00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:31,724 Now that's how that jacket was made to be worn. 38 00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:33,259 (chuckles) 39 00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:35,228 You know, it might be the bourbon talking, 40 00:01:35,295 --> 00:01:37,130 but, uh, I believe you. 41 00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:38,198 (chuckles) 42 00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,433 Whew. 43 00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:43,303 Calvin, you know what? You should get it. 44 00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:45,205 I mean, I do need a jacket, right? 45 00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:46,406 Yeah. 46 00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:49,876 And it's on sale for only $800. 47 00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:52,545 Man, this is L.A. Don't nobody need a jacket. 48 00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:54,280 Well, hold on, hold on, hold on. 49 00:01:54,347 --> 00:01:55,782 Calvin, don't take it off. 50 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:58,518 That jacket's so sharp, you might cut yourself. 51 00:01:58,585 --> 00:02:01,721 Aw, yeah, man. 52 00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:03,523 I do look fly, though, right? 53 00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:03,523 Yeah. 54 00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:06,392 I don't know, Dave, 55 00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:10,163 I just can't justify spending $800 for a jacket. 56 00:02:10,230 --> 00:02:11,464 If it makes you feel better, 57 00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:13,800 it's actually $799.99. 58 00:02:16,402 --> 00:02:19,339 So, you saying 700 and some change? 59 00:02:19,405 --> 00:02:20,840 Mm-hmm. 60 00:02:20,907 --> 00:02:22,775 Well, I can justify that. 61 00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,546 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 62 00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:27,847 ♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪ 63 00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:35,455 I mean, look, I can wear this 64 00:02:35,522 --> 00:02:37,457 to so many different special occasions. 65 00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:39,559 The Met Gala, all right. 66 00:02:39,626 --> 00:02:41,594 Pop it up like this, BET Awards. 67 00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:42,695 (laughs) 68 00:02:42,762 --> 00:02:43,930 And right here, 69 00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,733 double date with Barack and Michelle. 70 00:02:46,799 --> 00:02:49,269 But, baby, you don't do any of those things. 71 00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:51,404 Because I never had this jacket. 72 00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:56,175 Well, I think it's very chic, very sexy. 73 00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:58,344 When a piece tells your story, 74 00:02:58,411 --> 00:02:59,879 you got to read it, 75 00:02:59,946 --> 00:03:01,548 even if it was a lot of money. 76 00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:03,650 Well, Calvin, you know what they say, 77 00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:04,817 you can't take it with you. 78 00:03:04,884 --> 00:03:06,619 Well, they lied. 79 00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:08,221 I'm getting buried in this thing. 80 00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:11,190 Well, baby, I'm happy you're finally 81 00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:13,326 splurging a little on yourself. 82 00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:13,326 Yeah. 83 00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:14,661 (phone chiming) 84 00:03:14,727 --> 00:03:17,564 (gasps) Dave, Daisy Wasser just texted me back. 85 00:03:17,630 --> 00:03:18,631 Oh, my God. Okay. 86 00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,301 All right. It's all happening. 87 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:23,303 Okay, who's Daisy Wasser? 88 00:03:23,369 --> 00:03:24,671 My new mom friend. 89 00:03:24,737 --> 00:03:26,439 Her daughter Thatcher's on Grover's soccer team. 90 00:03:26,506 --> 00:03:29,342 Yeah, and her husband, Josh, is a celebrity chef. 91 00:03:26,506 --> 00:03:29,342 Mm-hmm. 92 00:03:29,409 --> 00:03:31,344 He owns a farm-to-table restaurant. 93 00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:33,846 That sounds like food with dirt on it. 94 00:03:33,913 --> 00:03:37,216 That's five-star dirt. 95 00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:38,952 More importantly... (sighs) 96 00:03:39,018 --> 00:03:40,520 we really need parent friends 97 00:03:40,587 --> 00:03:42,221 to do all these parent activities with. 98 00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,757 Like go to animated movies, kids' birthday parties, 99 00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:47,527 and water parks. Unless you guys are interested? 100 00:03:47,594 --> 00:03:50,430 We didn't want to do those things with our own damn kids. 101 00:03:52,398 --> 00:03:55,501 Well, look at us, we're all making new friends. 102 00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,270 (chuckles) 103 00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,270 (stammers) 104 00:03:57,337 --> 00:03:59,305 Hello? Jay-Z? 105 00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:01,941 You're making a new album? 106 00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:05,645 Of course. I would love to pose on the cover in my new jacket. 107 00:04:12,318 --> 00:04:13,953 Oh, hey, man. Where you coming from? 108 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:17,423 Uh... You know, I was out with the... 109 00:04:17,490 --> 00:04:18,625 (stammers, clears throat) Nowhere. 110 00:04:18,691 --> 00:04:21,995 (stammers) 111 00:04:18,691 --> 00:04:21,995 Man, what you doing? 112 00:04:22,061 --> 00:04:23,630 You left your phone in my car. 113 00:04:23,696 --> 00:04:25,264 (chuckles) Thanks. I'll see you later, Trey. 114 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:26,733 Hey, Marty, you would've loved that new Marvel movie. 115 00:04:26,799 --> 00:04:28,001 I'm surprised you didn't go with us. 116 00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:29,402 It was nerds everywhere. 117 00:04:30,637 --> 00:04:32,372 Goodbye, Trey. (grunts) 118 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:36,009 Get out. Get the hell out, Trey. 119 00:04:36,075 --> 00:04:37,977 Uh, I thought you said 120 00:04:38,044 --> 00:04:40,380 you didn't feel like going to the Marvel movie. 121 00:04:40,446 --> 00:04:42,482 (sighs) Look, I'm sorry. 122 00:04:42,548 --> 00:04:44,050 I forgot you wanted to see it, okay? 123 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,419 Which is why I put it in our shared calendar. 124 00:04:46,486 --> 00:04:48,321 (scoffs) Marty, you know I never check that. 125 00:04:48,388 --> 00:04:51,524 Which is why I put a Post-it on your pillow. 126 00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:53,593 Oh, come on, man. It's just a movie. 127 00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:54,961 I... 128 00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:57,330 A superhero movie 129 00:04:57,397 --> 00:04:58,765 is not just a movie. 130 00:04:58,831 --> 00:05:01,534 It is an experience. 131 00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:06,506 Well, here's to new parent friends 132 00:05:06,572 --> 00:05:08,441 that understand the importance of day drinking. 133 00:05:08,508 --> 00:05:10,677 (chuckles) 134 00:05:10,743 --> 00:05:13,980 Okay, Josh, look, I-I don't want to make this weird, but 135 00:05:14,047 --> 00:05:16,315 I followed your recipe for homemade beer 136 00:05:16,382 --> 00:05:18,451 and would love to know what you think. 137 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,955 Wow. Wow! 138 00:05:23,022 --> 00:05:24,857 (smacks lips) Is that clove? 139 00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,760 It is! Yeah, I was hoping you were gonna pick up on that. 140 00:05:28,761 --> 00:05:31,397 Hey, you guys are great hosts. 141 00:05:31,464 --> 00:05:33,399 Why don't you let us return the favor next time? 142 00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:35,535 Thatcher and Grover can swim 143 00:05:35,601 --> 00:05:36,903 while we hang at the bar 144 00:05:36,969 --> 00:05:38,071 in our pool. 145 00:05:38,137 --> 00:05:39,939 You haven't had a margarita 146 00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,941 until you had a swim-up margarita. 147 00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,509 Ooh. 148 00:05:43,576 --> 00:05:45,111 You know, I have been waiting my whole life 149 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,846 for someone to say those words to me. 150 00:05:46,913 --> 00:05:48,881 (laughter) 151 00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:52,552 Submit, human! 152 00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:52,552 Whoa. Okay, okay. All right, hey. 153 00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:55,521 Hey, guys. Guys. Hey, hey. Is everybody okay? 154 00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:57,023 We're space pirates. 155 00:05:57,090 --> 00:05:59,092 Aw, I love that you guys are using your imagination. 156 00:05:59,158 --> 00:06:00,593 You're so creative. 157 00:06:00,660 --> 00:06:02,428 And you're so basic. 158 00:06:02,495 --> 00:06:04,464 Stop talking to me like I'm a child. 159 00:06:06,132 --> 00:06:09,502 Thatcher, thanks for giving us your truth, 160 00:06:09,569 --> 00:06:11,471 but next time, let's choose kinder words. 161 00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:13,773 Okay. Will do, Daisy. 162 00:06:13,840 --> 00:06:14,974 (chuckles) 163 00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:19,445 Thatcher calls you by your first name? 164 00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:20,813 Yes, yes. 165 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,849 We, uh, we listen to a parenting podcast 166 00:06:22,915 --> 00:06:25,852 that suggests "mom and dad" causes an imbalance 167 00:06:25,918 --> 00:06:28,521 in the power dynamic between parent and child. 168 00:06:28,588 --> 00:06:30,056 Mm. Mm. 169 00:06:28,588 --> 00:06:30,056 GROVER: Stop. You're hitting too hard. 170 00:06:30,123 --> 00:06:32,024 THATCHER: I don't care! 171 00:06:30,123 --> 00:06:32,024 Okay. Yeah, sure. 172 00:06:32,091 --> 00:06:34,026 I guess, uh, there's an argument 173 00:06:34,093 --> 00:06:36,129 for empowering kids. 174 00:06:37,930 --> 00:06:39,799 Oh! 175 00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:41,501 Sorry. 176 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,970 No need to apologize, kids. 177 00:06:44,036 --> 00:06:45,505 Things are just things. 178 00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,540 Don't let it cause any psychic trauma. 179 00:06:50,877 --> 00:06:54,147 Guys, thanks for understanding. We will pay to replace it. 180 00:06:54,213 --> 00:06:55,948 (phone chimes) 181 00:06:56,015 --> 00:06:58,785 Oh, look at that. You already Venmo'd me. Thanks. 182 00:07:00,052 --> 00:07:02,121 We found that allowing Thatcher to discover 183 00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:04,423 her own boundaries is really good 184 00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:06,459 for her social-emotional portfolio. 185 00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:08,795 Hmm... 186 00:07:08,861 --> 00:07:10,530 Sometimes boundaries are good, right? 187 00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:13,099 You know, like at a museum or around my vase. 188 00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,638 Okay, baby, 189 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:20,606 you ready to go to dinner? 190 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:20,606 Oh, yeah. 191 00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:22,175 I've been dreaming about 192 00:07:22,241 --> 00:07:23,943 Brachetto's chicken parm all day. 193 00:07:24,010 --> 00:07:25,578 (chuckles) Well... 194 00:07:25,645 --> 00:07:26,846 We're going to a nice restaurant. 195 00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:28,214 Aren't you gonna wear your new jacket? 196 00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:31,584 (laughs) Brachetto's is not jacket worthy. 197 00:07:31,651 --> 00:07:34,887 (chuckles) Any place where you can use crayons 198 00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,890 to color on the table is not that nice. 199 00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:39,458 You're being ridiculous. 200 00:07:39,525 --> 00:07:40,993 You spent all that money on a new jacket, 201 00:07:41,060 --> 00:07:42,795 and now you're afraid to wear it? 202 00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:45,731 I'm not afraid to wear it. I just choose not to wear it 203 00:07:45,798 --> 00:07:49,202 out in that dirty world full of miscreants and vagabonds. 204 00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:52,905 Okay. Okay, you know what? 205 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,542 We're gonna take this nice and slow, okay? 206 00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:58,544 We're gonna put the jacket on... 207 00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:58,544 All right. 208 00:07:58,611 --> 00:07:59,712 Come on, baby, come on. You got-- 209 00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:02,248 Oh, look at that. Now... 210 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,985 we're gonna wear the jacket outside, 211 00:08:06,052 --> 00:08:08,888 and then if that goes well, we'll wear it to the car. 212 00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,623 (chuckles) 213 00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,623 Good? 214 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,258 No, I get it, I get it. 215 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,258 You got it? 216 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:15,728 It's nice, you know. Yeah. I mean, why was I tripping? 217 00:08:15,795 --> 00:08:18,731 You tripping. 218 00:08:15,795 --> 00:08:18,731 (chuckling) Come on. 219 00:08:18,798 --> 00:08:21,601 Okay, here we go. Thank you, baby. 220 00:08:21,667 --> 00:08:22,902 (thunder crashes) 221 00:08:22,969 --> 00:08:25,538 Aw, hell no. It's raining out there. 222 00:08:25,605 --> 00:08:27,273 God has spoken. Mm-mm. 223 00:08:30,576 --> 00:08:32,278 ANNOUNCER (on TV): And that does it for our post-game coverage 224 00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:35,648 of the epic battle between the Lakers and the Celtics. 225 00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:38,284 Man, I would've killed to have been at that game. 226 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,586 (laughing, cheering) 227 00:08:41,587 --> 00:08:43,022 Yeah! 228 00:08:43,089 --> 00:08:45,925 Oh, that was, hands down, one of the most fun nights 229 00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:48,261 ever! 230 00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:48,261 Yeah, no joke. 231 00:08:48,327 --> 00:08:50,563 And I've been to Medieval Times. 232 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:53,866 Hold up. W-Wait, wait. You two were at the game? 233 00:08:53,933 --> 00:08:56,068 Bro, we were basically in the game. 234 00:08:56,135 --> 00:08:59,038 Marty got us JPL floor seats. Thank you, science! 235 00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:01,240 You, too, Marty. 236 00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:02,909 Wow, really? 237 00:09:02,975 --> 00:09:05,111 You know how much I wanted to go to that game. 238 00:09:05,177 --> 00:09:09,015 Oh, and how would I know that? 239 00:09:09,081 --> 00:09:10,950 Did you put a Post-it on my pillow? 240 00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:13,085 I know what you're trying to do, Marty. 241 00:09:13,152 --> 00:09:16,155 Oh, do you now? Because all I was doing 242 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:18,557 was enjoying a night out with my good friend, Trey. 243 00:09:18,624 --> 00:09:20,760 First of all, Trey 244 00:09:20,826 --> 00:09:22,261 is my good friend. 245 00:09:22,328 --> 00:09:24,664 I mean, yeah, but you never got me 246 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:26,299 floor seats to the Laker game. 247 00:09:26,365 --> 00:09:30,002 Well, how about some tacos from the truck on 3rd Street? 248 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:31,971 Do I get guac? 249 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:31,971 Yes. 250 00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:33,205 You get guac. 251 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:39,011 I call dibs on the last Popsicle. 252 00:09:43,716 --> 00:09:47,586 I mean, that swim-up bar was awesome. 253 00:09:47,653 --> 00:09:50,623 You know, Josh did not have to name a margarita after me, 254 00:09:50,690 --> 00:09:53,960 but those Dave-aritas really hit the spot. 255 00:09:55,161 --> 00:09:56,595 What a perfect day. 256 00:09:56,662 --> 00:09:59,198 Perfect? Dave, you're wearing my wrap 257 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:00,633 because their obnoxious kid 258 00:10:00,700 --> 00:10:01,834 threw your clothes into the pool. 259 00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:03,936 Well, which allowed me 260 00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:07,640 to get a lovely breeze. 261 00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:07,640 (scoffs) 262 00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,875 Look, Josh and Daisy are great, 263 00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:12,044 but their daughter's a nightmare. 264 00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:14,146 She called me "troll toes." 265 00:10:14,213 --> 00:10:18,017 Which is more of an observation than it is a criticism. 266 00:10:19,852 --> 00:10:23,189 O-Okay, okay, look. 267 00:10:23,255 --> 00:10:24,924 Let's just give them one more chance. 268 00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:26,993 We have so much in common. 269 00:10:27,059 --> 00:10:29,061 You know, Thatcher just... 270 00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,630 keeps us on our troll toes. 271 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,668 Not funny, and besides, 272 00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:37,303 she's a bad influence on Grover. 273 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:39,205 Grover is a great kid. 274 00:10:39,271 --> 00:10:40,906 Thatcher is not gonna turn him. 275 00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:42,174 GEMMA: Oh, sweetie, 276 00:10:42,241 --> 00:10:43,709 it's getting late. 277 00:10:43,776 --> 00:10:44,977 Please take a quick shower before bed. 278 00:10:45,044 --> 00:10:47,913 I'll get to it when I get to it, Gemma. 279 00:10:51,217 --> 00:10:53,019 Upstairs, now. 280 00:10:53,085 --> 00:10:55,054 (groans) Fine. 281 00:10:58,958 --> 00:11:00,793 Uh... Gemma, 282 00:11:00,860 --> 00:11:02,228 I think we might want to be mindful 283 00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:04,897 of his social-emotional portfolio. 284 00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:07,833 Upstairs, now. 285 00:11:10,202 --> 00:11:11,303 Fine. 286 00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:20,813 Why are we hosting the Wassers again? 287 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,848 After yesterday, I am not in the mood. 288 00:11:22,915 --> 00:11:24,350 I didn't have a choice. 289 00:11:24,417 --> 00:11:26,786 Josh just texted me, "On our way," with a wine emoji. 290 00:11:26,852 --> 00:11:28,421 Well, let's just turn off the lights 291 00:11:28,487 --> 00:11:29,789 and pretend we're not home. 292 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,158 (knocking on door) 293 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,158 Too late. Hey! 294 00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:38,697 Hi. 295 00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:38,697 Oh, hey, guys. Hey, Thatcher. 296 00:11:38,764 --> 00:11:40,166 Uh, Grover's just having a snack in the kitchen. 297 00:11:40,232 --> 00:11:42,134 And before you ask, no, we don't have any candy. 298 00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:43,903 I already know that your snacks suck. 299 00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:46,172 Good thing I had chocolate in the car. 300 00:11:52,078 --> 00:11:53,879 Don't worry about that blanket, 301 00:11:53,946 --> 00:11:56,749 just an irreplaceable family heirloom. 302 00:11:56,816 --> 00:11:58,451 Sorry about that, 303 00:11:58,517 --> 00:12:00,386 and about yesterday. 304 00:11:58,517 --> 00:12:00,386 Yeah. 305 00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:02,455 We, uh, we brought you this biodynamic 306 00:12:02,521 --> 00:12:04,824 sparkling Lambrusco to apologize. 307 00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:07,226 Oh, well, that makes it all better. 308 00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:09,028 I'll go get some glasses. 309 00:12:09,095 --> 00:12:11,063 (glass shatters) 310 00:12:11,130 --> 00:12:13,499 Make that plastic cups. 311 00:12:11,130 --> 00:12:13,499 (knocking on door) 312 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,401 Ooh, excuse me. Sorry. 313 00:12:16,469 --> 00:12:18,170 Oh, hey, come on in, guys. 314 00:12:18,237 --> 00:12:21,507 Hey, we're just taking Calvin's new jacket 315 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:23,242 out for a test-drive. 316 00:12:24,443 --> 00:12:25,978 See? That wasn't so bad. 317 00:12:26,045 --> 00:12:27,880 Not so bad? 318 00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:29,515 Those pigeons on the power line were trying 319 00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:32,084 to go all Call of Duty on me. 320 00:12:32,151 --> 00:12:33,285 No pun intended. 321 00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,355 DAVE: Uh, Josh, Daisy, 322 00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:38,324 these are our dearest friends, Calvin and Tina Butler. 323 00:12:38,390 --> 00:12:39,959 Hey, so nice to meet you. 324 00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,362 (mechanical blipping) 325 00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:50,936 (alarm blaring) 326 00:12:52,471 --> 00:12:54,507 Josh Wasser. How you doing? 327 00:12:54,573 --> 00:12:55,808 Calvin Butler. 328 00:12:55,875 --> 00:12:57,443 Oh! (chuckles) 329 00:12:57,510 --> 00:13:00,212 No reason to do all that. You know what I mean? My man. 330 00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:04,283 Hey! 331 00:13:04,350 --> 00:13:06,152 I'm so glad you guys are here. 332 00:13:06,218 --> 00:13:09,088 (screaming) 333 00:13:06,218 --> 00:13:09,088 Whoa, careful, careful! 334 00:13:09,155 --> 00:13:10,222 Okay, all right. 335 00:13:09,155 --> 00:13:10,222 Oh, God. 336 00:13:12,124 --> 00:13:13,192 What the hell? 337 00:13:13,259 --> 00:13:14,927 It's fruit punch. 338 00:13:14,994 --> 00:13:18,330 Say hello to my little friend. 339 00:13:19,865 --> 00:13:21,934 Thatcher, 340 00:13:22,001 --> 00:13:23,969 are we making good decisions right now? 341 00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:27,339 (alarm blaring) 342 00:13:27,406 --> 00:13:29,408 Okay, that's it. I'm out of here. 343 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:31,143 There's a little white girl out of control. 344 00:13:31,210 --> 00:13:33,279 I'm gonna take my chances with the pigeons. 345 00:13:33,345 --> 00:13:35,381 (dramatic music playing) 346 00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:47,960 (distorted): I got you! 347 00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:51,163 (thuds) 348 00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:52,865 Yes. 349 00:13:57,002 --> 00:13:59,004 Ooh. 350 00:13:59,071 --> 00:14:01,073 (grunting) 351 00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:04,009 Hey, thank you for doing that for me. 352 00:14:04,076 --> 00:14:05,544 I did it for the jacket. 353 00:14:08,380 --> 00:14:09,882 Now, where is she? 354 00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:12,351 'Cause I ain't afraid to fight no fifth grader. 355 00:14:12,418 --> 00:14:13,953 Uh... 356 00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:16,422 That is just not the way we deal with our daughter. 357 00:14:16,488 --> 00:14:19,391 See, stains will come out, but psychic trauma, 358 00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:21,293 that lasts forever. 359 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,029 Right. 360 00:14:24,096 --> 00:14:25,364 That little girl 361 00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:28,133 needs some good old-fashioned Black parenting. 362 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:31,470 Say the word and me and Tina'll sneak through the back door. 363 00:14:33,405 --> 00:14:36,041 All I need is five minutes. 364 00:14:40,145 --> 00:14:42,014 Oh, 365 00:14:42,081 --> 00:14:44,516 so you up in here making a sandwich? 366 00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:46,285 Looks like it. 367 00:14:48,487 --> 00:14:51,056 Well, so am I. 368 00:14:54,593 --> 00:14:56,495 (clears throat) Pass me the mayo. 369 00:14:59,365 --> 00:15:01,600 (squishing) 370 00:15:03,969 --> 00:15:05,471 We all out. 371 00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:10,509 So, it's gonna be like that, huh? 372 00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:13,512 (chuckles) Oh, yeah. It's like that. 373 00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:15,381 (gags) 374 00:15:15,447 --> 00:15:18,017 Ah! Ah! 375 00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:20,919 I ruined my own sandwich out of spite. 376 00:15:20,986 --> 00:15:23,055 Look, Marty, this is stupid, man. 377 00:15:23,122 --> 00:15:24,523 What are we fighting for? 378 00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:28,093 Because you clearly don't like spending time with me. 379 00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,631 I do like spending time with you. 380 00:15:32,698 --> 00:15:35,501 I just don't like spending all my time with you. 381 00:15:35,567 --> 00:15:38,137 You know, we're brothers, we're roommates, 382 00:15:38,203 --> 00:15:39,538 we ride to work together. 383 00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,507 That's a lot. 384 00:15:41,573 --> 00:15:43,542 Well, why didn't you just say you needed space? 385 00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:45,444 Know what, you right. 386 00:15:45,511 --> 00:15:47,946 I should have, and I'm sorry. 387 00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:51,016 I'm sorry, too. 388 00:15:51,083 --> 00:15:52,685 All right. 389 00:15:54,687 --> 00:15:56,689 Dave, this isn't gonna work. 390 00:15:56,755 --> 00:16:00,392 I want parent friends, too, but not these parent friends. 391 00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:03,395 Let's just tell them, "Josh, Daisy. 392 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:05,097 "You're terrible parents, 393 00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:07,266 and your daughter is gonna grow up to become the Joker." 394 00:16:08,667 --> 00:16:10,302 Knock, knock. 395 00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:13,205 Guys, while you were in here, 396 00:16:13,272 --> 00:16:16,175 we were out there doing a tandem meditation. 397 00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:18,077 (groans) 398 00:16:18,143 --> 00:16:20,512 And, um, we were both picking up 399 00:16:20,579 --> 00:16:23,315 on some pretty negative harmonics. 400 00:16:23,382 --> 00:16:26,151 Yeah, well, we were in here 401 00:16:26,218 --> 00:16:29,088 picking up after your daughter's trail of destruction. 402 00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:34,259 Okay, okay, uh, well, clearly, we're struggling here. 403 00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:35,994 Uh, we just 404 00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:37,996 have very different parenting styles. 405 00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:37,996 (sighs) 406 00:16:38,063 --> 00:16:41,033 Yes, we're picking up on that, too, 407 00:16:41,100 --> 00:16:44,169 and we're happy to share some parenting tips with you. 408 00:16:45,771 --> 00:16:47,272 Wait, what? 409 00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:48,640 DAVE: Uh, you know what? 410 00:16:48,707 --> 00:16:51,143 Guys... (chuckles) Call us old-fashioned, 411 00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:54,046 but we are firm believers in, I d-- 412 00:16:54,113 --> 00:16:56,715 the traditional parent-child dynamic. 413 00:16:56,782 --> 00:16:58,484 Oh... 414 00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:01,453 That is so adorably Judeo-Christian of you. 415 00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:04,056 Okay, um... 416 00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:05,457 You know, before things get personal, 417 00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:07,226 why don't we, why don't we just be adults, 418 00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:09,194 put a pin in the parenting conversation, and go enjoy 419 00:17:09,261 --> 00:17:11,663 the very nice bottle of wine that you guys brought over. 420 00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:16,301 All right. 421 00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:17,636 See that? 422 00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,471 It was good that you married a mediator. 423 00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:20,806 Your mother was wrong. 424 00:17:24,309 --> 00:17:26,412 (gasps) 425 00:17:24,309 --> 00:17:26,412 Oh, my. You have got to be kidding me. 426 00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:27,579 No! 427 00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:27,579 (paint spraying) 428 00:17:27,646 --> 00:17:28,714 No. No way. 429 00:17:28,781 --> 00:17:30,749 That's your face right now, Gemma. 430 00:17:30,816 --> 00:17:32,718 Venmo's on its way. 431 00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:34,620 Thatcher, 432 00:17:34,686 --> 00:17:37,055 I know we practice our street art at home, 433 00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:39,224 but Dave and Gemma might not like it. 434 00:17:39,291 --> 00:17:40,692 We don't. Get out. 435 00:17:40,759 --> 00:17:42,694 Hey, uh, 436 00:17:42,761 --> 00:17:44,696 Josh, Daisy, this is over. 437 00:17:44,763 --> 00:17:46,298 Well, that breaks our hearts. 438 00:17:46,365 --> 00:17:49,067 Well, Thatcher broke our house. Bye. 439 00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:51,603 But I want to sign my work. 440 00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:53,105 Okay, you know what? 441 00:17:53,172 --> 00:17:54,606 How about this? "Xoxo, you little brat." 442 00:17:54,673 --> 00:17:56,241 Now, get out of here. 443 00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,412 Thank God 444 00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:02,247 I'm not her dad. 445 00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:06,452 Man, that girl was a lot. 446 00:18:06,518 --> 00:18:07,820 You did the right thing, Dave. 447 00:18:10,823 --> 00:18:12,858 Oh. 448 00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:14,460 I know. 449 00:18:14,526 --> 00:18:17,129 My room. No iPad. 450 00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:21,099 CALVIN: I've made my final decision. 451 00:18:21,166 --> 00:18:23,469 This jacket is driving me crazy, 452 00:18:23,535 --> 00:18:24,770 so I'm taking it back. 453 00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,772 Calvin, you're overreacting. 454 00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:28,640 Am I? 455 00:18:28,707 --> 00:18:31,176 I mean, you had to go all Secret Service 456 00:18:31,243 --> 00:18:34,213 just to protect me from little baby Scarface over there. 457 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:39,117 Clearly, I shouldn't have such an expensive jacket. 458 00:18:39,184 --> 00:18:41,386 You know who you remind me of right now? 459 00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,589 My mother. 460 00:18:43,655 --> 00:18:45,657 Okay, now you're just being mean. 461 00:18:47,493 --> 00:18:50,496 She saved up for years to buy this china set, 462 00:18:50,562 --> 00:18:53,732 and when she finally got it, she was so afraid it would break 463 00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:56,134 she never took it out of the box. 464 00:18:56,201 --> 00:18:57,703 And you know how this story ends. 465 00:18:57,769 --> 00:19:00,239 Yes. The china was safe 466 00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:02,508 and preserved for future generations. 467 00:19:03,942 --> 00:19:06,311 Yes, Calvin, but she also died 468 00:19:06,378 --> 00:19:08,480 before she got a chance to ever use it. 469 00:19:08,547 --> 00:19:10,148 Mm. 470 00:19:10,215 --> 00:19:11,850 Yeah, that's a shame. 471 00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:14,520 Your mother deserved to enjoy nice things. 472 00:19:14,586 --> 00:19:16,822 And so do you. 473 00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:18,690 (chuckles) 474 00:19:18,757 --> 00:19:21,159 You know what? You're right. 475 00:19:21,226 --> 00:19:23,395 Give me that jacket. 476 00:19:21,226 --> 00:19:23,395 Okay. 477 00:19:23,462 --> 00:19:26,932 You know, this neighborhood deserves nice things, too, 478 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:29,401 like seeing me in this jacket. 479 00:19:31,370 --> 00:19:33,805 I mean, I do look good, don't I? 480 00:19:33,872 --> 00:19:34,806 (whoops) 481 00:19:34,873 --> 00:19:36,475 Well, come on. 482 00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:38,277 Let's go give them something to talk about. 483 00:19:38,343 --> 00:19:40,579 Ooh, are we going someplace special? 484 00:19:40,646 --> 00:19:42,247 Yes. 485 00:19:42,314 --> 00:19:44,650 I'm taking my favorite girl out for ice cream. 486 00:19:44,716 --> 00:19:47,252 Ooh, yes. 487 00:19:44,716 --> 00:19:47,252 I-In a cup, not a cone. 488 00:19:47,319 --> 00:19:48,787 Okay. 489 00:19:47,319 --> 00:19:48,787 B-Baby steps. 490 00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:56,562 I mean, my man. 491 00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:59,865 First, you splurge on a new jacket, 492 00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:03,335 then you get two scoops of ice cream with sprinkles. 493 00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:05,270 (chuckles) 494 00:20:05,337 --> 00:20:06,772 YOLO, Tina. 495 00:20:06,838 --> 00:20:09,675 You know? I got to say, 496 00:20:09,741 --> 00:20:11,476 it feels kind of good 497 00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:14,680 splurging on things you don't necessarily need. 498 00:20:14,746 --> 00:20:17,249 I might have a little Diddy in me after all. 499 00:20:17,316 --> 00:20:18,650 You know. 500 00:20:17,316 --> 00:20:18,650 Uh-oh. Hey, hey. Hey, hey. 501 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:20,218 Get it, get it, baby. Get it. 502 00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:21,753 (knocking on door) 503 00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:21,753 Take that, take that. 504 00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:25,624 (chuckles) 505 00:20:25,691 --> 00:20:28,226 We have a surprise for you, Calvin. 506 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,402 I went and got the same jacket. 507 00:20:37,469 --> 00:20:39,504 Jacket twins. 508 00:20:40,539 --> 00:20:42,841 Wow. 509 00:20:40,539 --> 00:20:42,841 Okay, I see you walking. 510 00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:44,409 That's right. 511 00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:44,409 CALVIN: Walk it out, baby. 512 00:20:44,476 --> 00:20:45,844 Okay. Walk it. 513 00:20:44,476 --> 00:20:45,844 Get it, Dave. 514 00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:47,846 And two and three, and walk it out. 515 00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:47,846 All right. 516 00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:51,016 Walk it out. Walk it out. 517 00:20:56,455 --> 00:20:59,391 Captioning sponsored by CBS 518 00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:02,394 and TOYOTA. 519 00:21:02,461 --> 00:21:05,497 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 35445

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