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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:14,248 This coffee is so good. 2 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:15,983 It's got a nice body, 3 00:00:16,084 --> 00:00:18,086 a lot of light, biscuity notes up front, 4 00:00:18,186 --> 00:00:19,253 but it fades to reveal 5 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:20,754 an earthy yet creamy finish. 6 00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:22,990 Is it a shade-grown single origin? 7 00:00:24,125 --> 00:00:26,594 It's Folgers, Dave. 8 00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:29,663 That was my next guess. 9 00:00:31,099 --> 00:00:33,201 Hey-hey. Hey, Pops. 10 00:00:33,301 --> 00:00:35,436 We got a package at our house addressed to you. 11 00:00:35,536 --> 00:00:36,770 Well, all right. 12 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:38,639 And with a few days to spare, 13 00:00:38,739 --> 00:00:41,709 I finally got the perfect present for Tina's birthday. 14 00:00:41,809 --> 00:00:43,911 Got to do it big for your boo. 15 00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:47,047 Yeah, and Dad has a bad history with Mom's birthdays. 16 00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,184 Yep, he is 0 for all of them. Yeah. 17 00:00:50,284 --> 00:00:52,686 Remember when he got her that fancy vacuum cleaner? 18 00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:54,555 Oh, she was so upset. 19 00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:58,592 She vacuumed through every football game that season. 20 00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:01,862 Well, don't forget her 40th. 21 00:01:01,962 --> 00:01:02,930 The cake. 22 00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:04,132 Mm. 23 00:01:04,132 --> 00:01:05,299 Was it a carrot cake? 24 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,201 You know, vegetables have no place in cakes. 25 00:01:07,301 --> 00:01:08,536 Full stop. 26 00:01:09,470 --> 00:01:10,704 I like zucchini bread. 27 00:01:10,804 --> 00:01:11,839 No! 28 00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:15,509 It turns out that she was allergic. 29 00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,578 Her face swelled up like a blowfish. 30 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,647 That's why the next year, I got her a car. 31 00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:22,216 And ran over her foot with said car. 32 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:26,154 Well, I couldn't see over the big bow. 33 00:01:26,154 --> 00:01:28,222 But this year is going to be different. 34 00:01:29,157 --> 00:01:31,692 I got her the most amazing gift. 35 00:01:31,792 --> 00:01:34,162 A genuine Chanel jacket 36 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:36,830 straight off the runways of Paris. 37 00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:41,302 Look like it came straight from the Guangdong Province. 38 00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,173 She's gonna love it, baby... 39 00:01:45,173 --> 00:01:46,240 Here we go. 40 00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:48,942 Ah, yes. Oh, no. 41 00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:53,247 Hey, man, that's too small. 42 00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:54,848 I can see that, Dave. 43 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:59,220 Yeah, so I don't have to point out that it's spelled "channel"? 44 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:00,721 Uh, no. 45 00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:03,023 Well, looks like your streak continues. 46 00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:08,629 Hey. Hey. 47 00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:10,198 Now, what are you boys up to? 48 00:02:10,198 --> 00:02:11,865 Nothing. 49 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,634 Well, I hope you're not getting me 50 00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,703 anything extravagant for my birthday. 51 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,806 I don't need anything. All I need is you. 52 00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:20,508 Well, you know you got that. 53 00:02:20,608 --> 00:02:22,310 You know? But I got to do 54 00:02:22,410 --> 00:02:23,977 a little something for my baby, now. 55 00:02:24,077 --> 00:02:26,347 Okay, I'm just saying, when you look this good 56 00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:29,116 at my age, you can't ask for anything more, right? 57 00:02:29,217 --> 00:02:30,618 You know what I mean? You know that's right. 58 00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:32,620 You know what I mean? Fine as hell. 59 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:34,688 You do it, Mama. Okay. 60 00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:39,327 Oh, man, she is definitely going to want more. 61 00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:43,564 Luckily, we found the perfect gift. 62 00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,098 Oh, yes, we did. 63 00:02:45,233 --> 00:02:46,834 The latest in ergonomic sneakers 64 00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:48,869 because she's always complaining about how her feet hurt. 65 00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:51,004 Well, they did get run over. 66 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,275 Okay, how much do you want for 'em? 67 00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:56,777 Daddy, they're not for sale. 68 00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,078 Come on, guys. 69 00:02:58,246 --> 00:03:00,548 Look, I'll give you $300 cash right now. 70 00:03:00,648 --> 00:03:02,883 No, my brother. 71 00:03:02,983 --> 00:03:04,252 You have got to get your own. 72 00:03:05,353 --> 00:03:06,587 Watch out. 73 00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:08,622 Move out the way. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, 74 00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:10,524 mm-hmm. Ooh! 75 00:03:11,559 --> 00:03:13,561 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 76 00:03:13,661 --> 00:03:15,128 ♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪ 77 00:03:17,898 --> 00:03:19,733 Oh, hey, babe. 78 00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:23,136 What's going on? 79 00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:25,773 Our online fundraising auction goes live tonight, 80 00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,408 and our donations suck. 81 00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:30,444 What are you talking about? I just donated juggling lessons. 82 00:03:32,380 --> 00:03:33,581 Yeah. 83 00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:36,650 Anyway, I'm waiting for Jerry O'Connell 84 00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,051 to walk by to pick up his kids. 85 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:39,953 I'm going to "accidentally" bump into him 86 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:42,089 and get him to donate VIP tickets to The Talk. 87 00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:44,858 Oh, finally, the day I get to chop it up with Jerry. 88 00:03:44,958 --> 00:03:46,294 Ooh, there he is. 89 00:03:46,394 --> 00:03:47,361 He's mine. Jerry. 90 00:03:47,461 --> 00:03:49,297 Jerry! Ooh! Oh! 91 00:03:49,297 --> 00:03:50,764 Oh... 92 00:03:50,864 --> 00:03:53,667 Fire! Uh, false alarm. 93 00:03:53,767 --> 00:03:54,802 Hey. 94 00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:56,870 You okay? Yeah, I'm fine. 95 00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,639 Hey, can I ask you a quick question? 96 00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:00,574 No, I don't know how I got 97 00:04:00,674 --> 00:04:02,310 Rebecca Romijn to marry me. 98 00:04:05,479 --> 00:04:08,181 That's funny. I-I'm her husband Dave. 99 00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:10,884 I don't know how I got her to marry me either. Oh. 100 00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:14,855 So, anyway, our big online fundraiser 101 00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:16,424 is coming up, and I was wondering 102 00:04:16,524 --> 00:04:18,692 if you might be able to donate something to auction off. 103 00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:20,160 Of course. I'm pretty sure 104 00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:22,930 I have a Kindle that's still in the box. 105 00:04:23,030 --> 00:04:23,931 Brand-new. 106 00:04:24,031 --> 00:04:27,335 Oh, uh, yeah, thanks. 107 00:04:27,335 --> 00:04:30,338 I'm kidding. How many VIP tickets to The Talk do you need? 108 00:04:30,338 --> 00:04:33,674 Oh, four. Yes. Thank you. Thank you. 109 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,409 Hooah. 110 00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:37,578 I'm sorry? 111 00:04:37,678 --> 00:04:38,746 No, I'm-- I just-- 112 00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:39,947 I-I don't... Oh. 113 00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:41,782 I don't mean to embarrass you, 114 00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:46,219 but, uh, I just-- Scent of a Woman is my favorite movie. 115 00:04:46,354 --> 00:04:48,889 Me, too. But that was Chris O'Donnell. 116 00:04:48,989 --> 00:04:50,591 I'm Jerry O'Connell. 117 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:03,604 I'll take any idea you got. 118 00:05:03,704 --> 00:05:06,273 I am desperate to find something special. 119 00:05:06,374 --> 00:05:08,208 Well, I got her this amazing perfume 120 00:05:08,376 --> 00:05:10,277 I found on Oprah's Favorite Things list. 121 00:05:10,378 --> 00:05:13,280 It's designed by her personal scent sommelier. 122 00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:17,485 Perfect. I'll give you $300 cash right here, right now. 123 00:05:17,585 --> 00:05:21,154 Calvin. Come on, it's your wife's birthday. 124 00:05:21,254 --> 00:05:22,623 You've got to dig deeper. 125 00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,625 All right, $350. 126 00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:26,026 Calvin! 127 00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:28,929 Just, whenever I ask her what she wants, 128 00:05:29,029 --> 00:05:31,131 she says, "All I need is you." 129 00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:32,232 Well, yeah, that's what we all say, 130 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:35,035 but we actually want the gift. 131 00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:36,269 Well, 132 00:05:36,404 --> 00:05:37,705 you know, I got Miss Tina a present. 133 00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:40,808 I'm going to play her a song on my recorder. 134 00:05:40,908 --> 00:05:42,242 I've been practicing for weeks. 135 00:05:42,410 --> 00:05:45,846 Grover, that's really sweet and thoughtful. 136 00:05:45,946 --> 00:05:46,980 Look, say it's from me, 137 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:48,549 I'll give you $300 cash. 138 00:05:48,649 --> 00:05:51,284 Mixed bills, tens and 20s. Ooh, money, money. 139 00:05:51,419 --> 00:05:53,454 No, no, no, no. No money. 140 00:05:53,554 --> 00:05:56,123 Come on, Calvin, don't give up. 141 00:05:56,223 --> 00:05:58,191 Why not support a good cause and get her something 142 00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,060 from the school auction site? 143 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:03,096 All right, I guess it couldn't hurt. 144 00:06:04,665 --> 00:06:07,901 Lunch with the football coach. Boo. 145 00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:09,236 Yeah. All right. 146 00:06:09,336 --> 00:06:11,104 Juggling lessons. That's got to be Dave. 147 00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:14,742 A 60-pound weighted blanket? 148 00:06:14,842 --> 00:06:16,209 How do you get out of bed? 149 00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:19,212 It's been a rough year for donations. 150 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:20,448 Ooh, ooh, ooh. 151 00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:23,350 VIP tickets to The Talk. 152 00:06:23,451 --> 00:06:24,485 Tina loves The Talk. 153 00:06:24,585 --> 00:06:26,219 Sheryl Underwood is her girl. 154 00:06:26,319 --> 00:06:27,988 All right, you know what? I'll buy those. 155 00:06:28,088 --> 00:06:29,790 Great. Auction goes live tonight. 156 00:06:30,658 --> 00:06:34,595 Okay, well, how about I give you $300 cash 157 00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:38,365 right now and we cut out the middleman? 158 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:42,503 The middleman is the scholarship fund 159 00:06:42,603 --> 00:06:44,137 for underprivileged kids. 160 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,574 Okay, all right. $375. No. 161 00:06:46,674 --> 00:06:49,076 $400 and I take Grover for the night. 162 00:06:49,176 --> 00:06:51,712 We all know he can be a handful. 163 00:06:51,812 --> 00:06:53,481 I'm right here. 164 00:06:56,016 --> 00:06:57,618 Man, this auction is blowing up. 165 00:06:57,718 --> 00:07:00,220 I've had to up my bid, like, nine times. 166 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,321 Scent of a Woman. 167 00:07:01,489 --> 00:07:03,256 How could I be so stupid? 168 00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:06,126 Okay. All right. We're down to the last minute. 169 00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:07,895 Okay, here we go-- oh. 170 00:07:07,995 --> 00:07:09,062 Oh... Hey. 171 00:07:10,363 --> 00:07:11,298 What are you boys doing out here? 172 00:07:11,398 --> 00:07:13,300 Oh, you know, uh, watching porn. 173 00:07:14,502 --> 00:07:16,136 No, we are not. 174 00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:17,771 Oh. 175 00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:19,206 I get it. I get it. 176 00:07:19,306 --> 00:07:21,875 The birthday girl is going to go back inside now. 177 00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,043 Yeah. All right. 178 00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:24,311 Bye. 179 00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:25,913 Man, that was terrible. 180 00:07:26,013 --> 00:07:28,716 You're lucky I was here. You froze up. 181 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,419 Oh. Oh, man, I got to up my bid. 182 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,121 Down to the final five seconds. 183 00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:35,789 Okay, here we go. Okay. 184 00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:38,759 Three, two, one. 185 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:40,127 Yeah! Got it! 186 00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:41,629 Yeah, baby! Let's go! 187 00:07:41,729 --> 00:07:43,030 You're going to the... Shh! 188 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:47,535 Right, uh, wow, that is some pretty wild pornography. 189 00:08:01,949 --> 00:08:05,018 Oh, wow. Aw. 190 00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:07,154 Oh, thank you, Grover. 191 00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:09,557 Bless your little heart. 192 00:08:09,557 --> 00:08:11,291 That was beautiful. 193 00:08:11,391 --> 00:08:12,926 What was that? "Sweet Caroline"? 194 00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:15,629 I thought it was "Back That Azz Up." 195 00:08:17,865 --> 00:08:19,567 He's been working on it all week. 196 00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:21,735 Yeah, that's easily the best that it's sounded. 197 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,270 Yeah. Aw. 198 00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:26,473 Well, thank you, Johnson family, for my lovely perfume. 199 00:08:26,574 --> 00:08:27,975 And the concert. 200 00:08:28,075 --> 00:08:30,110 Yeah, yeah, uh, nice effort. 201 00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:32,345 Open ours, Mommy. Oh, oh. 202 00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:36,784 Okay, let me see what my babies got me. 203 00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,118 Ugh. 204 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:43,857 These are nice. 205 00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:47,060 Is that why you said "ugh"? 206 00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:48,962 Oh, did I? No, no, I... 207 00:08:49,062 --> 00:08:51,832 Well, they look like old lady sneakers. 208 00:08:51,932 --> 00:08:53,834 No, no, no, no, no. Th-They're not for old ladies. 209 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,335 They're just padded to relieve foot pain, 210 00:08:55,435 --> 00:08:58,038 improve posture, and prevent varicose veins. 211 00:09:00,774 --> 00:09:02,342 Well, when you put it like that... 212 00:09:02,442 --> 00:09:04,111 Oh, damn. 213 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:07,881 Oh, yeah. Look at that. 214 00:09:07,981 --> 00:09:09,717 They're endorsed by Marla Gibbs. 215 00:09:11,518 --> 00:09:14,254 Y'all got y'all mama some Air Gibbs? 216 00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:18,626 We have got to get Mama something else. 217 00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:20,193 Oh, yeah, y'all definitely do. 218 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:21,795 Yeah, we know, Gemma. 219 00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:25,699 Well, babe, you're going to need someplace to wear 220 00:09:25,799 --> 00:09:27,901 your nice new Velcro kicks. 221 00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:31,171 So here you go. Oh, that's sweet, baby. 222 00:09:31,271 --> 00:09:33,406 What'd you get me? 223 00:09:33,506 --> 00:09:34,908 Oh, my God! 224 00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:37,645 You got me four tickets to The Talk? Yes. 225 00:09:37,745 --> 00:09:39,747 I get to see my girl Sheryl in person? 226 00:09:39,847 --> 00:09:43,951 Oh, baby, this is the best gift ever. 227 00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,719 Hit it, Grover. I'm feeling it. 228 00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,554 I'm feeling it. 229 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,902 Baby, we are in the front row. 230 00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:04,337 I mean, Sheryl is going to be right there. 231 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:05,605 I could touch her. 232 00:10:05,706 --> 00:10:06,907 Okay, you know what? You know who's else 233 00:10:07,007 --> 00:10:08,575 gonna be right here is security. 234 00:10:08,676 --> 00:10:09,843 Don't do that, okay? 235 00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,311 Okay. 236 00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:12,780 So exciting. 237 00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,381 You know, Jerry is definitely going to see me. 238 00:10:14,481 --> 00:10:17,417 This is the last chance for me to save our friendship. 239 00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:19,019 There is no friendship. 240 00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:22,555 Well, not with that attitude, there isn't. 241 00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:26,994 Welcome to The Talk. 242 00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:28,829 - ♪ You and me ♪ -♪ You and me ♪ 243 00:10:28,929 --> 00:10:30,964 ♪ You know we make some real good company ♪ 244 00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,199 ♪ Company... ♪ 245 00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:34,434 Oh, my God, it's Sheryl! It's Sheryl! 246 00:10:34,534 --> 00:10:36,369 ♪ You know we make some real good company ♪ 247 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,005 Hi, Sheryl! 248 00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:42,109 ♪ Hoppin', we poppin', all the magic we makin' ♪ 249 00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:45,545 ♪ Lord knows I love conversating with you ♪ 250 00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:48,548 Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! 251 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:49,783 Jerry! 252 00:10:49,883 --> 00:10:51,384 Wrong show. Wrong Jerry. Stop doing that. 253 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,385 Stop doing that. 254 00:10:57,858 --> 00:10:59,860 Okay, here's a gift idea. 255 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:02,395 An LED light therapy rejuvenation mask. 256 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:03,931 Are you crazy? 257 00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:06,734 That'll be like telling Mama her face isn't juvenated. 258 00:11:09,737 --> 00:11:12,205 See, man, look, look. Look at this. 259 00:11:12,305 --> 00:11:15,876 Ah. Things were so easy when we were little. Huh. 260 00:11:15,976 --> 00:11:18,445 We made her an ugly necklace out of macaroni 261 00:11:18,545 --> 00:11:19,747 and she loved it. 262 00:11:19,747 --> 00:11:22,816 Oh, man. Yeah, I remember that. 263 00:11:22,916 --> 00:11:24,251 You know, one time 264 00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,754 I gave her a Lando Calrissian action figure 265 00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:28,121 that she bought me, 266 00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,757 and she said it was her favorite gift ever. 267 00:11:29,857 --> 00:11:33,393 Yeah, and then you took it right back. 268 00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,629 She wasn't gonna play with it. 269 00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:40,901 Well, as you know, we here on The Talk are big fans of chili. 270 00:11:41,001 --> 00:11:43,203 And today our own Sheryl Underwood 271 00:11:43,303 --> 00:11:45,806 is going to share her secret recipe. 272 00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:50,143 And spoiler alert, it is good. 273 00:11:50,243 --> 00:11:51,311 So good. 274 00:11:51,411 --> 00:11:53,080 Oh, you guys, stop. 275 00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:55,415 Okay, now, I'm going to invite a few 276 00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:58,485 lucky audience members up on stage to sample it. 277 00:11:58,585 --> 00:11:59,853 Anybody hungry? 278 00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:01,154 Me! Me, me, me! Me! Oh! 279 00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:02,790 I'm starving, I'm starving! 280 00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:04,524 Hey, birthday girl. Birthday girl right here. 281 00:12:04,624 --> 00:12:06,794 Oh, yeah, a-and the birthday girl's friends. 282 00:12:06,794 --> 00:12:07,895 And the birthday girl's friend. 283 00:12:07,995 --> 00:12:09,262 Okay, you four. Come on. 284 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:10,430 Oh. Okay! 285 00:12:10,530 --> 00:12:12,432 Come on, baby. Come on, let's go. 286 00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:14,101 Oh, I'm so excited. 287 00:12:14,201 --> 00:12:15,435 Hey. 288 00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:17,670 Come on up. 289 00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:20,373 Okay, okay. Where are you from? 290 00:12:20,473 --> 00:12:21,875 Pasadena, Sheryl. 291 00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:23,510 Uh-huh. I'm Tina and you're Sheryl. 292 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:25,078 All day, every day. 293 00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:28,115 Sheryl is standing right here, Calvin. She's right here. 294 00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:29,516 I can see that, babe. 295 00:12:29,616 --> 00:12:31,184 Was 'cause your man finally got you 296 00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:32,452 a great birthday present. 297 00:12:32,552 --> 00:12:34,021 Yes, you did, baby... you're so sweet. 298 00:12:34,121 --> 00:12:35,856 And your birthday's about to get even better 299 00:12:35,956 --> 00:12:37,991 because I'm going to make you some chili. 300 00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,126 Ooh. Ooh! 301 00:12:40,828 --> 00:12:42,495 Hey, Jerry O'Connell. 302 00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:46,299 Why don't you come and, uh, Stand by Me? 303 00:12:47,634 --> 00:12:49,336 Yes, that was, uh, that was 304 00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:51,839 a movie I was actually in. Very good. Very good. 305 00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:54,541 Very good. All right, let's get cooking. 306 00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:56,977 Yes. Show me the chili! 307 00:12:57,077 --> 00:12:58,846 Okay. Yeah. I was also in Jerry Maguire. 308 00:12:58,946 --> 00:13:00,848 Let's move on. We're moving on. 309 00:13:00,948 --> 00:13:02,049 Got him. 310 00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:05,085 Okay, I need an assistant chef. 311 00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:06,619 Oh, oh, you got to pick my baby. 312 00:13:06,719 --> 00:13:09,422 She's been cooking me the best chili for over 30 years. 313 00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:10,557 Oh, stop it, baby. 314 00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:14,127 Oh, looks like I got some competition. 315 00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:17,530 Oh, wow. Mom is on TV cooking with her hero. 316 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,632 What kind of cheese are you going to use, 317 00:13:19,732 --> 00:13:25,138 Jerry O'Connell? Monterey Jack or... Kangaroo Jack? 318 00:13:25,906 --> 00:13:28,008 Oh, David. 319 00:13:29,076 --> 00:13:31,144 As every great cook knows, 320 00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:33,713 the secret to chili is the spices. 321 00:13:33,881 --> 00:13:36,049 And I got my own special blend. 322 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:38,485 Cayenne. Ooh, all right, now. 323 00:13:38,585 --> 00:13:40,921 Paprika. Oh, I see you. I see you. 324 00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:41,922 Mustard seed. 325 00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:43,957 Ooh. Huh? 326 00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:47,027 And a little something-something that they won't see coming. 327 00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:48,395 Horseradish. 328 00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:50,063 Mm. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. 329 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,498 All right, everybody, 330 00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:53,766 you have Sheryl's chili in front of you, 331 00:13:53,901 --> 00:13:55,402 so let's dig in. 332 00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:57,104 All right. 333 00:13:57,204 --> 00:14:00,040 Okay. All right. Okay. 334 00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:02,109 Mmm. 335 00:14:02,209 --> 00:14:04,344 Mmm. This is good. 336 00:14:04,444 --> 00:14:05,745 This is so good, Sheryl. 337 00:14:05,913 --> 00:14:06,980 It's really good. 338 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:08,949 Here you go, birthday girl. 339 00:14:09,049 --> 00:14:11,618 Bon appétit. All right. Okay. 340 00:14:11,718 --> 00:14:14,354 Thank you, Sheryl. 341 00:14:21,294 --> 00:14:23,296 You don't like it? 342 00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:25,398 I do. It's so good. 343 00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,768 This is a masterpiece. Yeah. 344 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:32,572 You know what? All this need is a whole bunch of crackers. 345 00:14:34,975 --> 00:14:37,144 Tina doesn't like my chili. 346 00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:38,711 You all like my chili, right? 347 00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:41,048 Oh, yeah, yeah, so, so good. It's so yummy. 348 00:14:41,148 --> 00:14:42,449 Amazing. 349 00:14:42,549 --> 00:14:44,784 I'm almost done. Yeah. Hey. This is spicy. 350 00:14:44,952 --> 00:14:47,087 So it's just you. No. 351 00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:49,389 No, no, no. Because I-I love it. 352 00:14:49,489 --> 00:14:51,224 I love it. The chili is good. 353 00:14:51,324 --> 00:14:52,859 Okay, then-then eat some more. 354 00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:53,961 Go ahead. 355 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:56,663 Okay, let me... Mangia. 356 00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,499 ...have some more chili. 357 00:15:08,508 --> 00:15:10,043 I think this segment is over. 358 00:15:10,143 --> 00:15:14,147 And I think y'all been lying about my chili this whole time. 359 00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:15,482 You know what? 360 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,517 We're going to pay some bills right now, okay? 361 00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:19,987 We'll be right back with more Talk. 362 00:15:23,390 --> 00:15:25,325 Aw. 363 00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:28,828 Oh, Sheryl, don't be like that. 364 00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,230 See what you did, Akbar? 365 00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:32,599 Sheryl! 366 00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:38,038 Hey. Gemma? 367 00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,706 Calvin, what are you doing here? 368 00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:43,776 Look, I need you to do me a favor. 369 00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:46,146 I need to talk to Jerry O'Connell. 370 00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:48,381 No. Nuh-uh. 371 00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:50,017 After what happened this morning? 372 00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:52,152 Well, that's the thing. 373 00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:54,854 Look, I finally got Tina the perfect gift, 374 00:15:55,022 --> 00:15:57,690 and it wound up being her worst birthday ever. 375 00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:03,063 She told me she wished I just ran over her feet again. 376 00:16:03,163 --> 00:16:05,565 I understand. 377 00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:07,300 But I can't allow you to approach 378 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:09,102 a parent on school property 379 00:16:09,202 --> 00:16:10,670 without proper... Hey, Erica. 380 00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:12,605 Ooh, there he is. Hey, Jerry! 381 00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:16,776 Jerry. Oh, sorry. Oh! Why? Why? 382 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:19,946 You okay? 383 00:16:20,047 --> 00:16:21,648 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Please, please tell me 384 00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,316 that guy Dave is not with you. 385 00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:25,318 Uh... 386 00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:28,321 Oh, no, no, no, I barely know that guy, man. 387 00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:31,424 Hey, look, Jerry, um, 388 00:16:31,524 --> 00:16:34,061 my wife Tina, she loves Sheryl so much, 389 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:38,131 and, uh, this morning, you know, it-it ruined her birthday. 390 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:40,067 Uh, I think we should move on. 391 00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:42,735 Here's the weighted blanket you won at the auction. 392 00:16:46,173 --> 00:16:47,307 You okay? Oh, yeah. 393 00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:48,775 I got it, I got it. 394 00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,444 Look, I-I was just hoping that maybe 395 00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:53,446 you could put Tina in touch with Sheryl 396 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,148 so that she can apologize. 397 00:16:55,248 --> 00:16:56,516 Well, I-I'd love to help you out, 398 00:16:56,616 --> 00:16:57,984 but Sheryl is not upset with your wife. 399 00:16:58,085 --> 00:16:59,586 Sheryl's upset with us for not being 400 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:01,754 more real with her about her chili, 401 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,290 which is not great chili. 402 00:17:03,390 --> 00:17:07,660 Yeah, I'm not sure if it was even chili. 403 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:09,596 We were just trying to spare her feelings, 404 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,864 and now Sheryl's embarrassed. 405 00:17:11,964 --> 00:17:13,766 She said she's never cooking on our show again. 406 00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:18,105 O-Okay, well, maybe we can help each other out. 407 00:17:18,105 --> 00:17:19,806 Come on, let me help you with that blanket. 408 00:17:19,906 --> 00:17:22,675 You know, it just so happens 409 00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,544 my wife makes a mean chili. 410 00:17:24,644 --> 00:17:26,446 Oh, I certainly believe the mean part. 411 00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,014 Slow your roll. 412 00:17:28,115 --> 00:17:30,117 That's my wife we talking about now. 413 00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:35,422 Tina doesn't like my chili. Pause. 414 00:17:35,522 --> 00:17:38,125 Right there. Look at my face. 415 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:43,463 Yeah. That's not pretty. Ugh. 416 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:44,631 You're an attractive woman, 417 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:46,733 but that's not a good face. 418 00:17:47,667 --> 00:17:50,270 Babe, I know your birthday is over... 419 00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:53,039 Are you day-drinking with Dave? 420 00:17:54,307 --> 00:17:57,310 You know, I don't think Akbar liked me either. 421 00:17:58,145 --> 00:18:00,280 Anyway, look, I know your birthday's over, 422 00:18:00,380 --> 00:18:01,648 but I got one more gift for you, 423 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,550 and it's a chance to make things right. 424 00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:05,852 I just want you... So you're just gonna leave me on the front porch 425 00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:07,687 like I'm an Amazon package? 426 00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:10,957 Hello, Tina. 427 00:18:11,057 --> 00:18:13,860 Calvin, Sheryl Underwood is in my house. 428 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:16,629 I know, babe. I brought her. 429 00:18:16,729 --> 00:18:18,831 Sheryl Underwood, 430 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,601 I am so sorry about this morning. 431 00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:23,570 It's, it's just my face. You know? 432 00:18:23,670 --> 00:18:25,004 It-it won't lie. 433 00:18:25,172 --> 00:18:26,639 Girl, I know it. 434 00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,975 I watched it back on slow-mo. 435 00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:31,944 But I want to thank you. 436 00:18:32,044 --> 00:18:34,247 You were the only one that was honest with me. 437 00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:35,682 Oh. 438 00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,985 I hated the chili, too. Even more than her. 439 00:18:39,085 --> 00:18:42,622 Little late, Jerry O'Connell superfan. 440 00:18:42,722 --> 00:18:45,057 Uh, so he mentioned me? 441 00:18:45,192 --> 00:18:48,195 Nobody's talking about you, Dave. 442 00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:51,198 Tina, I brought Sheryl here so that you could teach her 443 00:18:51,298 --> 00:18:52,865 how to make chili the right way. 444 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:54,767 Oh, hell yeah, I will. 445 00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:57,304 Come on, girl. Let me get you a glass of wine. 446 00:18:57,404 --> 00:18:59,339 That's all right, girl. 447 00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:01,674 I got one. 448 00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:04,744 Calvin! Sheryl Underwood is in my kitchen. 449 00:19:04,844 --> 00:19:06,246 I can see. 450 00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:09,416 This is the best birthday ever. Again. 451 00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:12,084 So, what do I need to know? 452 00:19:12,219 --> 00:19:14,421 Okay, first off, the horseradish has got to go. 453 00:19:14,521 --> 00:19:15,988 That's my mother's recipe. 454 00:19:16,088 --> 00:19:18,225 Oh, she doesn't know how to cook either, huh? 455 00:19:18,225 --> 00:19:19,292 Tina! 456 00:19:22,962 --> 00:19:24,597 Ooh, okay. Where are you taking me? No, no, 457 00:19:24,697 --> 00:19:26,299 Keep your eyes closed. Okay. 458 00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:29,836 Okay. Almost. Almost. All right. 459 00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:31,504 And open 'em. 460 00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,273 Ta-da! 461 00:19:34,374 --> 00:19:35,842 Wow. What's all this? 462 00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:37,043 It's your present. 463 00:19:37,143 --> 00:19:38,978 Look, Ma, we-we were trying to find 464 00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:40,913 the perfect birthday present for you, 465 00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:44,384 and we remembered that you really loved this one. 466 00:19:44,484 --> 00:19:45,785 Aw. 467 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:47,820 We remember this day as being pretty much perfect, 468 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,256 so we decided to recreate it. 469 00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:52,492 Oh, thank you. Are those sandwiches? 470 00:19:52,592 --> 00:19:53,493 Yep. 471 00:19:53,593 --> 00:19:55,495 Tuna fish and Cheetos. 472 00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:57,730 Yep, there's the yucky face. 473 00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:59,632 There it is. 474 00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:01,801 But I love it. I will eat it. 475 00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:04,504 Thank you. Boys, this is... 476 00:20:04,604 --> 00:20:06,539 This is all I could want. 477 00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:07,707 Mwah. 478 00:20:07,807 --> 00:20:08,741 My babies. Mwah. 479 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:10,042 Happy birthday, Mama. 480 00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:11,411 Thank you. This is... Okay, Mom, 481 00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:12,812 I need you to smile, we about take a picture. 482 00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:13,813 All right, come on. Okay. 483 00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:15,348 Let's take a picture 484 00:20:15,448 --> 00:20:17,284 with my babies. 485 00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:19,752 Here we go. 486 00:20:19,852 --> 00:20:21,354 Three, two... 487 00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:23,089 What y'all looking at? 488 00:20:23,189 --> 00:20:24,357 Dad. Come on, Pop. 489 00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:26,726 We're trying to recreate this photo. 490 00:20:26,826 --> 00:20:28,361 Oh, but, man, I didn't know. 491 00:20:28,461 --> 00:20:30,096 That's okay, baby, why don't you just get in the picture? 492 00:20:30,196 --> 00:20:31,998 Oh, okay. All right, good. Let's do it. 493 00:20:32,499 --> 00:20:34,233 Come on, baby. Here we go. 494 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:36,202 And three, two-- 495 00:20:36,303 --> 00:20:38,004 Ooh, do I smell Cheetos and tuna? 496 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:39,105 Ah, Dave. David. 497 00:20:39,205 --> 00:20:40,973 They're trying to take a photo. 498 00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:44,010 Oh, you know what? Let's just do one with everybody. All right. 499 00:20:44,110 --> 00:20:45,478 Come on. Here we go. Come on, brother. 500 00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:47,179 Get in. Get in. All right. Good. 501 00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:48,281 And... 502 00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:50,750 All right, everybody say chili. 503 00:20:50,850 --> 00:20:52,151 Chili! 504 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:54,287 Captioning sponsored by CBS 505 00:20:54,387 --> 00:20:56,356 and TOYOTA. 506 00:20:58,625 --> 00:21:02,128 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 35475

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