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1
00:00:18,286 --> 00:00:19,187
Hey, Calvin.
2
00:00:19,287 --> 00:00:20,654
Hola, mi amor.
3
00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:23,357
Guess what I'm making.
4
00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:24,758
Paella.
Paella.
5
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:30,098
Yes, the authentic recipe
we learned in "Barthelona."
6
00:00:30,931 --> 00:00:33,867
Well, you know, you could say
Barcelona like an American.
7
00:00:33,967 --> 00:00:36,137
No, I like saying "Barthelona"
8
00:00:36,237 --> 00:00:37,405
like a "Barthelonian."
9
00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:41,375
You know, Calvin, you don't
have to make paella every day.
10
00:00:41,475 --> 00:00:44,812
I still haven't finished
my lunch paella.
11
00:00:48,116 --> 00:00:50,318
Hey, you must have
had a busy day.
12
00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:52,520
Yeah, let's go with that.
13
00:00:54,788 --> 00:00:57,225
And speaking
of getting busy,
14
00:00:57,325 --> 00:01:00,961
you know, we haven't done
that since this morning.
15
00:01:02,363 --> 00:01:03,931
Calvin, where's my favorite mug?
16
00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:06,134
Oh, I, uh,
I threw it out.
17
00:01:06,934 --> 00:01:09,603
Yeah, I was watching
Jennifer Hudson this afternoon,
18
00:01:09,703 --> 00:01:11,339
and the feng shui
expert said that
19
00:01:11,439 --> 00:01:14,808
you should replace any
chipped or broken item.
20
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,977
But my mug wasn't chipped.
21
00:01:17,145 --> 00:01:18,679
Well, I broke it
22
00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:20,514
when I was trying to
feng shui the kitchen.
23
00:01:21,782 --> 00:01:23,351
Oh, by the way,
24
00:01:23,451 --> 00:01:26,154
Magnum, P.I. thinks we should
get a reverse mortgage.
25
00:01:26,154 --> 00:01:27,621
What you think?
26
00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:32,193
Okay, Calvin,
I know that you've had
27
00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:36,164
a lot of time on your hands
since selling the shop, but...
28
00:01:36,164 --> 00:01:40,168
you got to stop
watching daytime TV.
29
00:01:40,168 --> 00:01:42,536
How about you just
get out the house?
30
00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:44,372
Do something.
31
00:01:44,472 --> 00:01:46,540
Babe, I'm doing things.
32
00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:48,376
I got plenty of stuff to do.
33
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,511
My schedule is jam-packed.
34
00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:54,014
Alexa, what's
on my calendar tomorrow?
35
00:01:54,182 --> 00:01:56,717
At 03:00 p.m.,
you have a haircut.
36
00:01:56,817 --> 00:01:58,919
Hmm?
Didn't you get a
haircut yesterday?
37
00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:02,190
Yes, Tina.
I'm a very hairy man.
38
00:02:04,392 --> 00:02:07,328
Well, how about you
go out and play some golf?
39
00:02:08,262 --> 00:02:10,063
Well, all my friends work.
40
00:02:11,732 --> 00:02:13,066
Are you trying to get rid of me?
41
00:02:13,201 --> 00:02:15,769
No, no, no, baby.
I just...
42
00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:17,505
I don't think it's very healthy
43
00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:19,873
for a man to stay
at home all day,
44
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,210
or his wife
might kill him.
45
00:02:22,310 --> 00:02:25,746
Oh! I just watched
a Lifetime movie about that.
46
00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:27,448
You know, the lady
got away with it, too.
47
00:02:28,782 --> 00:02:30,751
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
48
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:32,353
♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪
49
00:02:35,223 --> 00:02:38,326
Okay.
Oh, Tina, we can't
take all your paella.
50
00:02:38,426 --> 00:02:41,562
Please take it.
It'll really help my marriage.
51
00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:44,365
Ooh, look, Dave wants some.
He's drooling.
52
00:02:44,465 --> 00:02:46,567
Nah, it's from the dentist.
53
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,236
I'm still numb.
54
00:02:50,338 --> 00:02:52,273
Here, sweetie,
clean yourself up.
55
00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:57,878
So, has it been hard for Calvin
having all this free time?
56
00:02:57,978 --> 00:03:00,648
Hard for me.
He's driving me crazy.
57
00:03:00,748 --> 00:03:02,015
He's always here.
58
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:04,051
He watches my shows before I do
59
00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:06,053
and then spoils the endings.
60
00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:07,855
You know, I finally
just sent him to Ernie's bar
61
00:03:07,955 --> 00:03:09,022
to give away
some of this paella.
62
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:11,359
And there's this much left?
63
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,094
You feel my pain.
64
00:03:14,262 --> 00:03:15,263
Ooh.
65
00:03:16,497 --> 00:03:18,599
Mama! Oh.
Hey, guys.
66
00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,868
Hey.
Did a box come for me today?
67
00:03:20,968 --> 00:03:22,135
Oh, yeah, it's right over there.
68
00:03:22,270 --> 00:03:24,672
Um, why did you
have it sent here?
69
00:03:24,772 --> 00:03:26,507
I didn't want Malcolm to see it.
70
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:29,477
It's a longsword
for my Arthurian groom-posal.
71
00:03:29,577 --> 00:03:31,379
It's a what for the what what?
72
00:03:34,181 --> 00:03:35,949
I'm gonna ask Malcolm
to be my best man.
73
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,851
And then slay him?
74
00:03:38,852 --> 00:03:41,422
Marty's doing a grooms-posal.
75
00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:43,857
They're like prom-posals,
but for your groomsmen.
76
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:45,826
Yeah, back when I did mine,
77
00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:47,828
society thought
they were only for bridesmaids.
78
00:03:48,762 --> 00:03:51,299
Then I rode into
my friend Bobby's yard
79
00:03:51,399 --> 00:03:53,867
on that horse, shirtless.
80
00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:59,340
I broke barriers
for groomsmen everywhere.
81
00:04:00,408 --> 00:04:01,442
I'm...
82
00:04:01,542 --> 00:04:03,877
I'm-I'm gonna go "shirt on."
83
00:04:04,645 --> 00:04:07,481
But I do want Malcolm
to be blown away.
84
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:10,684
So, uh, Marty, got all your
groomsmen picked out already?
85
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:12,786
Yeah. Yeah.
86
00:04:12,886 --> 00:04:14,855
Well, i...
It's only four of us.
87
00:04:14,955 --> 00:04:16,757
It's Malcolm, my two
best friends from college,
88
00:04:16,857 --> 00:04:19,092
and my play
cousin Daniel.
89
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:21,562
S-So he's not even
90
00:04:21,662 --> 00:04:22,830
a real cousin, huh?
David...
91
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,965
Dave, let it go.
You're not in the wedding.
92
00:04:25,065 --> 00:04:27,000
Stop being so thirsty.
93
00:04:32,340 --> 00:04:36,577
Oh, shoot. Ernie's killing it
at cornhole. He's undefeated.
94
00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,346
Hey, Calvin,
95
00:04:38,346 --> 00:04:41,014
do you want me to embarrass
you next or should I
96
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:42,516
crush Trey as a warm-up?
97
00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:45,185
Also, no outside food.
98
00:04:45,353 --> 00:04:46,354
Oh.
99
00:04:46,354 --> 00:04:48,722
It's paella.
I brought you some.
100
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,891
Oh, don't mind if I do.
101
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:53,594
Winning burns a lot of calories.
102
00:04:55,463 --> 00:04:57,565
Ernie, I haven't seen
you lose in a week.
103
00:04:57,665 --> 00:04:58,732
You juicing?
104
00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:01,101
Nah. No, man.
No, no, no.
105
00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:02,536
I'm just the best holder
106
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:05,373
anyone's seen
this side of the 405.
107
00:05:05,473 --> 00:05:07,007
Probably the other side, too.
108
00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:09,076
There's just
too much traffic to be sure.
109
00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:14,615
You bragging about
throwing beanbags in a hole?
110
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:22,122
Sound like somebody's scared.
111
00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:25,426
Ooh, I'm terrified.
112
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,628
What's the next challenge--
hopscotch?
113
00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:29,963
Or maybe Candy Land?
114
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,500
Calvin, just whup his ass
and shut him up.
115
00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:33,401
Man.
Hey.
116
00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:35,202
I-It's ridiculous, man.
117
00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:38,639
This requires no skills.
I mean, anybody could do it.
118
00:05:38,739 --> 00:05:40,307
Watch.
119
00:05:43,977 --> 00:05:45,145
Ha-ha!
120
00:05:45,245 --> 00:05:47,014
Reminds me of the time
we played mini-golf
121
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:48,682
and you hit that old lady.
122
00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:51,485
It was a bank shot
off her walker.
123
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:52,753
I still made par.
124
00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,254
Ah.
125
00:05:56,424 --> 00:05:57,991
Okay.
126
00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:00,861
Oh. Oh, yeah.
127
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:02,830
Close, close, but no cigar.
128
00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:04,164
All right,
this ain't over.
129
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,434
All right, here we go.
130
00:06:10,971 --> 00:06:11,872
Yeah!
131
00:06:11,972 --> 00:06:13,206
Oh!
132
00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:15,643
Boom, baby! In your face!
133
00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:18,846
Okay, Calvin.
All right.
134
00:06:18,946 --> 00:06:21,048
If you feeling so cocky,
135
00:06:21,148 --> 00:06:22,716
then why don't you
play in the tournament?
136
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,184
Mm, nah, I'm good.
137
00:06:24,284 --> 00:06:27,020
Uh-huh. Uh, I-I forgot--
you retired.
138
00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:29,289
You too busy
sitting on the front porch
139
00:06:29,457 --> 00:06:31,024
in a rocking chair.
140
00:06:31,124 --> 00:06:33,260
Ooh!
141
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:36,797
You know what?
I'm in.
142
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:39,900
And for your information,
it's a glider!
143
00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:43,604
All right.
Well, good luck, Calvin.
144
00:06:43,704 --> 00:06:47,307
Good luck. Oh, did you see
the gallery of champions?
145
00:06:47,475 --> 00:06:49,643
They all look a lot like me,
don't they?
146
00:06:51,712 --> 00:06:54,815
You know, I forget about
the year you had the toupee.
147
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:57,818
It's called a hair unit.
148
00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:04,858
Hold on.
149
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:09,329
Oh, my God!
150
00:07:14,568 --> 00:07:16,369
Marty, what is going on?
151
00:07:16,504 --> 00:07:19,640
Malcolm Langston Butler,
first of his name,
152
00:07:19,740 --> 00:07:21,108
you are hereby
153
00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:22,610
commanded to pull
154
00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,745
the sword from
yon stone.
155
00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:28,916
Only the true best man
can such a feat achieve.
156
00:07:31,985 --> 00:07:33,153
What?
157
00:07:33,253 --> 00:07:36,624
If thou wouldst be the best man,
158
00:07:36,724 --> 00:07:40,293
thou must pull the very
expensive custom-engraved sword
159
00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:42,696
from yonder stone.
160
00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:46,534
Okay, Marty, obviously
I am going to be your best man.
161
00:07:46,534 --> 00:07:49,236
Uh, did you say "wouldst"?
What does that even mean?
162
00:07:49,336 --> 00:07:51,271
I don't know, man.
Can you just play along?
163
00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:52,773
No, I said I'm in, Marty, okay?
164
00:07:52,873 --> 00:07:54,575
I-I'm doing
all the best man stuff.
165
00:07:54,675 --> 00:07:56,544
I went to the cake tasting,
we went soup shopping.
166
00:07:56,544 --> 00:07:58,546
Okay, if-if you're
not into this,
167
00:07:58,646 --> 00:08:00,247
maybe I'll ask somebody else.
168
00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:02,449
Marty, I'm your only brother.
169
00:08:02,550 --> 00:08:04,818
Who else would you ask
to be your best man?
170
00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:05,819
Derek.
171
00:08:07,387 --> 00:08:09,890
Derek?
Derek has no personality.
172
00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,458
He's a board game friend.
173
00:08:11,559 --> 00:08:13,393
You have to be distracted
just to hang out with him.
174
00:08:13,561 --> 00:08:14,562
Well, Derek would
have pulled the sword
175
00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:15,696
from the stone by now, man.
176
00:08:15,796 --> 00:08:17,665
Well, 'cause Derek is a dork!
177
00:08:17,765 --> 00:08:20,568
Great.
You tell him that to his face
178
00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:22,169
when he takes your role
as the best man.
179
00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:23,203
Wha...
180
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,638
From the shadows you come
181
00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:28,375
and to the shadows
I bid you return.
182
00:08:32,746 --> 00:08:35,015
Almost had it.
183
00:08:36,584 --> 00:08:39,252
Don't flatter yourself.
You weren't even close.
184
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:40,888
You're pulling
your left shoulder.
185
00:08:40,988 --> 00:08:42,422
Thanks a lot, Gemma.
186
00:08:42,590 --> 00:08:44,157
But a lot of those bags
went in the hole
187
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:45,959
before you
broke my concentration
188
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:48,028
by sneaking up on me.
189
00:08:49,429 --> 00:08:51,164
Okay, you want
to keep missing,
190
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:52,399
keep doing it your way.
191
00:08:52,499 --> 00:08:54,401
Or you could
square up a bit
192
00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:56,269
and add a little arc
to your toss,
193
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:57,671
like this.
194
00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:02,910
Damn, woman, you can hole.
195
00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:04,477
Where'd you learn
to play like that?
196
00:09:04,612 --> 00:09:06,647
There wasn't a lot to do
in Hickory Corners.
197
00:09:06,747 --> 00:09:07,915
All we had was corn.
198
00:09:08,015 --> 00:09:09,617
Either you ate it
or you threw it.
199
00:09:09,617 --> 00:09:10,984
Or the crows got it.
200
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:13,721
On a bad day, all
three could happen.
201
00:09:14,487 --> 00:09:17,090
So, you used to play with corn?
202
00:09:17,190 --> 00:09:18,525
Did you not have Barbie dolls?
203
00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:19,927
Crows got 'em.
204
00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:24,031
That's why I became
so good at cornhole.
205
00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:25,198
Uh, w-wait, wait.
206
00:09:25,298 --> 00:09:26,499
I want to learn how to play.
207
00:09:26,634 --> 00:09:28,702
Cornhole isn't
something you learn.
208
00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:30,671
It's something you become.
209
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:32,339
When I holed,
210
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:34,842
I gave myself fully
to the game.
211
00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:36,443
I'd expect you
to do the same.
212
00:09:36,543 --> 00:09:38,178
I'm ready. No.
213
00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:40,513
No, you're not.
214
00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,016
But you will be.
215
00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:45,719
Forget everything you think
you know about cornhole.
216
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:48,488
I literally know nothing.
217
00:09:48,656 --> 00:09:52,660
Raw clay.
I like it.
218
00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:57,564
Derek?
219
00:09:57,665 --> 00:10:00,467
Derek is gonna be your best man?
Yes, Mom.
220
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:04,204
Help me remember--
did I carry Derek in my womb?
221
00:10:05,005 --> 00:10:06,874
I think you know you did not.
222
00:10:06,974 --> 00:10:09,643
Then Derek should not
be your best man.
223
00:10:09,743 --> 00:10:11,244
Calvin, back me up.
224
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,047
Listen to your mama, boy.
225
00:10:14,147 --> 00:10:16,383
Ooh!
Four in a row!
226
00:10:17,484 --> 00:10:19,086
Calvin!
227
00:10:19,186 --> 00:10:22,656
What? I'm folding the laundry.
Thanks for noticing.
228
00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:26,326
Stop playing games and help me
talk some sense into this boy.
229
00:10:26,426 --> 00:10:30,030
Uh, Marty, if you want your
brother to be your best man,
230
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:32,465
you should ask him
like a normal person.
231
00:10:32,565 --> 00:10:33,734
I'm sure he'll say yes.
232
00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:35,368
Well, he did
say yes.
233
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,972
That's not the point, Daddy.
He disrespected my process.
234
00:10:40,107 --> 00:10:41,274
Listen, baby,
235
00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:43,210
when you look back
on your wedding
236
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:45,212
years from now...
237
00:10:47,881 --> 00:10:49,216
...you're gonna
want to have those memories
238
00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:50,550
with your brother.
239
00:10:51,819 --> 00:10:53,420
Calvin, what the
hell are you doing?!
240
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,789
I'm emptying the dishwasher.
241
00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:58,325
Apparently, I have to do
everything around here.
242
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,064
That was going in.
243
00:11:06,967 --> 00:11:09,169
I mean, it is nonstop, Trey.
244
00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:11,571
One ridiculous wedding event
after another,
245
00:11:11,739 --> 00:11:13,974
a-and the groom-posal
was insane.
246
00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:16,109
There was a rock,
there was a sword,
247
00:11:16,209 --> 00:11:17,878
and then there was
a suit of armor.
248
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:22,983
So, he did all that just
to ask you to be his best man?
249
00:11:23,083 --> 00:11:24,885
Yes. I mean,
it's ridiculous, right?
250
00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:25,986
Tell me I'm wrong.
251
00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:27,755
You're wrong.
Thank you.
252
00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:29,757
Wait, what?
253
00:11:29,757 --> 00:11:31,424
I'm just saying,
Marty went through
254
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:33,927
all that trouble to make you
feel loved and appreciated,
255
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:36,129
and you went
and acted like a jackass.
256
00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:38,398
I did not.
257
00:11:41,168 --> 00:11:44,004
Word on the street is you
were a total jackass to Marty.
258
00:11:46,239 --> 00:11:47,941
I said yes to Marty, okay?
259
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:50,110
Look, maybe I wasn't as nice
as I could have been... Okay,
260
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,611
I-I don't care. Uh...
261
00:11:52,780 --> 00:11:55,515
Are you now bumped down
to regular groomsman
262
00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:57,184
or... or are you out out,
263
00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:59,086
and now there's an opening?
264
00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:02,389
Well, I can't be completely
out of the wedding, Dave.
265
00:12:02,489 --> 00:12:05,392
Uh, I mean, look,
I got to do something.
266
00:12:05,492 --> 00:12:08,996
Marty's a big baby,
but he is my baby brother.
267
00:12:09,096 --> 00:12:11,498
You're right.
You're a good brother.
268
00:12:11,598 --> 00:12:13,133
Damn it.
269
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:16,169
So, what do I do?
270
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:24,044
Malcolm, go to him.
271
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:28,816
Yeah, but you got to
do it right.
272
00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:32,485
After what you did,
you need to go all the way. Yeah.
273
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,022
Meaning I got to
completely humiliate myself?
274
00:12:35,122 --> 00:12:37,157
No, no, not at all.
275
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,960
Now, let's talk
tunics and tights.
276
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,662
Oh...
277
00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:56,576
You do know there's nothing
in your hand, right?
278
00:12:57,644 --> 00:12:59,246
Of course, babe.
279
00:12:59,346 --> 00:13:02,015
The tournament is tonight.
I can't risk injury.
280
00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:04,551
Hey, Tina, would you
do me the honor
281
00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:07,921
of shagging my bags
this evening?
282
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,389
Do what now?
283
00:13:11,558 --> 00:13:13,861
I forgot,
you don't speak hole.
284
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:17,865
It means retrieving my bags.
285
00:13:17,865 --> 00:13:20,367
I just need to concentrate
on my throwing.
286
00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:23,871
Alexa, is it windy
in Pasadena tonight?
287
00:13:23,871 --> 00:13:26,173
Hello, Cornhole King.
288
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:28,441
This evening
in Pasadena, California,
289
00:13:28,541 --> 00:13:31,378
it's breezy
at 14.2 miles per hour.
290
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:32,679
Hmm.
291
00:13:32,779 --> 00:13:36,216
I'm gonna have to adjust
my arc for the wind.
292
00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:42,555
Did you actually program Alexa
to call you Cornhole King?
293
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:46,693
Yes. And trust me,
it's starting to catch on.
294
00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:51,098
Uh, you know, Calvin,
295
00:13:51,198 --> 00:13:53,033
I know I encouraged you
to get out of the house
296
00:13:53,133 --> 00:13:54,467
and find something to do,
297
00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:56,236
but don't you think
that maybe you're taking
298
00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:58,238
this Cornhole thing
a little too seriously?
299
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,273
Don't be ridiculous.
300
00:14:01,909 --> 00:14:05,979
Calvin, bombaye!
301
00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:08,982
Calvin, bomba...
302
00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:11,584
Did you people not see Ali?
303
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:15,388
Calvin, bombaye!
304
00:14:15,488 --> 00:14:19,492
Calvin, bombaye!
Calvin, bombaye!
305
00:14:24,597 --> 00:14:26,199
Go, babe!
306
00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:30,403
It's all right, my man.
307
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:31,638
You can tell your grandkids
308
00:14:31,738 --> 00:14:34,074
you got beat by Calvin Butler.
309
00:14:34,174 --> 00:14:35,608
Go on, now.
310
00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:40,413
Calvin, let's talk management.
311
00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:43,583
What are you celebrating?
312
00:14:43,683 --> 00:14:45,185
You haven't won anything yet.
313
00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:47,620
I just took the semis.
314
00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:49,822
Finish the job!
315
00:14:51,124 --> 00:14:52,659
Sorry, Calvin.
316
00:14:52,759 --> 00:14:54,694
You've had your fun,
but your little lucky streak
317
00:14:54,794 --> 00:14:57,664
ends here.
This is my house.
318
00:14:57,764 --> 00:15:00,033
Yeah, that's because
you lost your real house
319
00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:01,501
in your last divorce.
320
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:05,705
True.
321
00:15:05,805 --> 00:15:10,110
But not you or my
other exes or the IRS
322
00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:11,311
can take cornhole from me.
323
00:15:11,411 --> 00:15:14,414
Don't you worry, Calvin Butler.
324
00:15:14,514 --> 00:15:15,983
I'll keep the trophy here.
325
00:15:15,983 --> 00:15:17,985
You can come see it
whenever you want.
326
00:15:17,985 --> 00:15:19,419
Oh. Uh,
327
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:20,720
I'm gonna see it every night
328
00:15:20,820 --> 00:15:22,822
'cause it'll be in my bedroom.
329
00:15:22,990 --> 00:15:24,457
The hell it will.
330
00:15:24,557 --> 00:15:27,494
Hey, uh, shag girl,
you're messing up my trash talk.
331
00:15:39,339 --> 00:15:40,840
Hedwig?!
332
00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:50,583
"Your presence is requested
in Mother and Father's yard
333
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:53,253
"at the stroke of 9:00.
334
00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:57,324
Yours, magically,
Alan Dumbledore."
335
00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:01,628
It's Albus, but okay.
336
00:16:07,034 --> 00:16:09,736
Who dares approacheth my lair?
337
00:16:09,836 --> 00:16:12,072
You invited me, Dumbledore.
338
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,673
Yes, right.
339
00:16:13,773 --> 00:16:16,843
Approacheth, Grayskull Legolas.
340
00:16:16,943 --> 00:16:19,046
You are mixing
so many different things,
341
00:16:19,146 --> 00:16:20,680
but I love it!
342
00:16:23,416 --> 00:16:24,784
When I cast this spell,
343
00:16:24,884 --> 00:16:26,553
you will no longer remember that
344
00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:29,589
I was dickish unto thee.
345
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:33,460
And you will once again
welcome me back
346
00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:37,230
as your best friend,
your best brother and...
347
00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:40,067
...your best man.
348
00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:44,704
Kombucha!
349
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:49,576
Yes. A thousand times yes.
350
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,147
This is unbelievably tense.
351
00:16:54,247 --> 00:16:55,648
It is?
352
00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:59,986
They're tied. They've gone
bag-for-bag this whole round.
353
00:17:00,087 --> 00:17:01,188
The next hole wins.
354
00:17:01,288 --> 00:17:03,123
Ooh, and then we're done?
355
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,593
Oh. Hey, hey.
356
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,228
You hear that, Calvin?
357
00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:10,897
That hole is
calling my name.
358
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,268
Ooh!
359
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:16,569
Yeah.
360
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:18,505
Oh, I hear it now.
361
00:17:18,605 --> 00:17:19,606
And it's saying,
362
00:17:19,706 --> 00:17:22,275
"You're in second place,
sucker."
363
00:17:23,110 --> 00:17:25,178
Time out. Time out, time out.
364
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:27,480
Calvin, his bag
is teetering over the edge.
365
00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:29,015
It's air mail time.
366
00:17:29,116 --> 00:17:30,150
Air mail?
Yes.
367
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,418
We practiced this.
368
00:17:31,518 --> 00:17:33,153
No, we didn't.
369
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:35,355
We didn't? Crap.
370
00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:36,856
Okay.
371
00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:39,826
You've got to arc high.
Crazy high.
372
00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:41,861
Higher than you've ever
arced in your life.
373
00:17:41,961 --> 00:17:43,963
Your bag's got to come
straight down
374
00:17:44,131 --> 00:17:46,566
through that hole without
taking Ernie's bag in with it.
375
00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,635
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Delay of game.
376
00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:51,138
Okay, hey, I'm tossing.
377
00:17:51,238 --> 00:17:53,140
I'm tossing, man.
378
00:17:53,140 --> 00:17:54,807
Okay.
379
00:18:21,801 --> 00:18:24,804
Yes! We did it!
We're awesome!
380
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:27,340
Suck it, loser!
381
00:18:29,676 --> 00:18:32,179
Hey, uh, good game, Calvin.
382
00:18:32,179 --> 00:18:34,714
Yeah, that felt pretty good. Oh,
383
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:36,516
need to take your picture
for the wall.
384
00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:38,585
Oh, not without my shag girl.
385
00:18:38,685 --> 00:18:40,019
Nah, I'm good.
386
00:18:42,255 --> 00:18:43,656
Hey, that was, uh
387
00:18:43,756 --> 00:18:45,525
that was some fine holing, Calvin.
388
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:47,527
Yeah.
Maybe the best I've ever seen.
389
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:49,629
It was fun.
Yeah, it was.
390
00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:52,832
Oh, it doesn't have to be over.
See, there's a doubles circuit.
391
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:55,001
We can take this act
on the road as a team.
392
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:58,004
There is a tournament
next weekend in Reno.
393
00:18:58,104 --> 00:19:00,540
Now, the way I figure...
Look, sorry, Ernie.
394
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:04,043
I mean, since I sold the
shop, I have been looking
395
00:19:04,211 --> 00:19:06,913
for something to be
passionate about, but...
396
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:09,849
this is your thing,
man. All right?
397
00:19:09,949 --> 00:19:11,584
I'm still searching for mine.
398
00:19:11,684 --> 00:19:14,221
Mm. You'll
find it, baby.
399
00:19:14,221 --> 00:19:17,390
Hey, you-you sure
about that, Calvin?
400
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:19,959
Very.
But you--
401
00:19:20,059 --> 00:19:21,394
you go out there
and give 'em hell.
402
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:22,729
Hey!
403
00:19:22,829 --> 00:19:24,897
I'll do it.
I'll go with you, Ernie. Reno!
404
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:27,066
Reno!
405
00:19:27,234 --> 00:19:28,000
Hey,
406
00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:29,236
you drive stick?
Yeah.
407
00:19:29,236 --> 00:19:30,637
Uh-huh.
Yeah, you do.
408
00:19:30,737 --> 00:19:31,738
Hey, hey!
409
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:33,139
You're not
going to Reno.
410
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,074
You're a wife, a mother
and a principal.
411
00:19:35,242 --> 00:19:36,343
Okay, Gemma,
412
00:19:36,443 --> 00:19:38,711
uh, go home, all right?
Go on, now.
413
00:19:38,811 --> 00:19:40,480
Go.
414
00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:49,256
Something is definitely
wrong with her.
415
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:01,100
David Seymour Johnson,
416
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,636
first of his name, come forth.
417
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:12,178
Oh, my God.
418
00:20:12,279 --> 00:20:13,780
Is this happening?
419
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,316
The maiden Necie hath decreed
420
00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:20,086
that the size of her bridal
party will increase by one.
421
00:20:20,186 --> 00:20:21,821
Her cousin Keisha
will be joining us
422
00:20:21,921 --> 00:20:23,423
from the Woods of Ingle.
423
00:20:24,824 --> 00:20:25,858
Huh?
424
00:20:25,958 --> 00:20:27,660
Keisha from Inglewood.
425
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:34,033
Wilst thou do me
the most high honor
426
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:36,102
of joining the Groom's Watch?
427
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:38,305
Wedding is coming.
428
00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:42,542
T'would be my honor, your grace.
429
00:20:44,210 --> 00:20:47,547
With thy very knee
I bendeth like Beckham.
430
00:20:52,585 --> 00:20:53,786
Macchiato!
431
00:20:59,058 --> 00:21:02,028
Captioning sponsored by CBS
432
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:04,831
and TOYOTA.
433
00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:08,368
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
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