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1
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,799
[cat purrs, meows]
2
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[fast, lively flamenco music playing]
3
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[screams]
4
00:00:14,306 --> 00:00:15,306
[giggles]
5
00:00:17,684 --> 00:00:19,478
- [Puss yowling]
- El Gato!
6
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[yowls]
7
00:00:39,081 --> 00:00:41,625
- [swords clanging]
- [thieves growling]
8
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,043
[Puss grunting]
9
00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:49,132
Villains. You think you can beat
Puss in Boots?
10
00:00:49,216 --> 00:00:50,217
[grunting]
11
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,678
Honestly? Not really... [shouts]
12
00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:56,306
I would've run away already
but I'm afraid you'll stab me in the butt.
13
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:57,558
[chuckles, grunts]
14
00:01:03,939 --> 00:01:05,357
[all screaming]
15
00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:12,990
Now, let us see what they have.
16
00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:17,244
Oh.
17
00:01:17,327 --> 00:01:18,370
What is this?
18
00:01:22,874 --> 00:01:25,377
A storybook about me?
19
00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:29,006
This can only be a wonderful thing
and in no way menacing.
20
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[Puss shouts]
21
00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:33,802
[grunting]
22
00:01:36,138 --> 00:01:38,140
Okay, maybe a little menacing.
23
00:01:38,557 --> 00:01:40,601
[male voice] Once upon a time,
24
00:01:40,684 --> 00:01:43,061
a cat was trapped in a book.
25
00:01:43,645 --> 00:01:44,645
Hello?
26
00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:46,148
Where are you?
27
00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:49,234
I am everywhere. [voice echoes]
28
00:01:49,318 --> 00:01:51,278
You may call me...
29
00:01:51,695 --> 00:01:52,904
the Storyteller.
30
00:01:53,071 --> 00:01:55,073
Did you say I'm trapped in a book?
31
00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:58,952
Yes. And in this book,
I control everything.
32
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Almost.
33
00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:04,416
For I am compelled by eldritch forces
beyond my ken
34
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:07,085
to offer some choices to you.
35
00:02:07,878 --> 00:02:11,256
Choices that affect your destiny.
36
00:02:12,090 --> 00:02:13,467
I am not following you.
37
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:14,551
[Storyteller sighs]
38
00:02:14,885 --> 00:02:19,264
It means that sometimes I'm going
to let you choose what will happen.
39
00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:21,099
Ah.
40
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,644
And now your first choice.
41
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Choose now:
42
00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:31,443
Will you fight a god,
or would that be rather odd?
43
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:36,073
If so, perhaps you'd rather be
in pitched battle with a tree?
44
00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:37,740
Huh?
45
00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,119
Are you kidding?
Why would I choose to fight a god?
46
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:43,288
You choose to fight a god? So be it.
47
00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:46,249
What?! Who are you, Storyteller?
I must know.
48
00:02:46,333 --> 00:02:49,378
- I must know your true identity.
- I'll never tell.
49
00:02:50,295 --> 00:02:53,465
Wait, I have to fight a god?
What if I do not want to?
50
00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,425
[grunting]
51
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:56,802
You have no choice.
52
00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:01,139
[grunts] Huh?
53
00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:03,892
[thudding]
54
00:03:05,394 --> 00:03:07,229
But, Taranis, we are friends!
55
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:10,315
Taranis will not listen
to your lying talk-words.
56
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,275
We fight now, little fox.
57
00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:14,820
Fox? I am clearly a cat.
58
00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:17,989
Taranis apologizes.
59
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,658
[grunting]
60
00:03:21,118 --> 00:03:22,577
Ha. [gasps]
61
00:03:25,664 --> 00:03:26,664
[Puss grunting]
62
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,712
I have your magic wheel.
63
00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:34,506
Whoa. [grunts]
64
00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:37,050
Oh, no. Without it, I am powerless.
65
00:03:37,134 --> 00:03:38,385
[Puss grunting]
66
00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:39,553
I know.
67
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:41,638
[purring]
68
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[screaming]
69
00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:46,810
Ow! [grunting]
70
00:03:53,275 --> 00:03:54,818
Curse you, cat-fox.
71
00:03:56,278 --> 00:03:58,405
[whirring]
72
00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,575
[Puss grunting]
73
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:06,997
Curse you! [echoing]
74
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:12,043
I am calling that a victory.
I cannot be beaten.
75
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:18,133
Oh, no? You will see, Puss in Boots,
that you are at the mercy of my whims.
76
00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:21,094
And the only way to escape from this book
77
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:24,389
in which you've found yourself
so disastrously trapped...
78
00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:27,476
- Yes?
- Is...
79
00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:30,353
Yes?
80
00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:32,647
To get to...
81
00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:34,064
the end!
82
00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:35,400
The end?
83
00:04:35,484 --> 00:04:36,484
The end.
84
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,738
I accept your challenge, Storyteller.
85
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:44,951
[Storyteller] So, Puss in Boots,will you with a giant talk,
86
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,329
or will you now be Goldilocks?
87
00:04:47,746 --> 00:04:50,916
How can I possibly
make such a difficult decision?
88
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:52,876
I do not want to wear that wig.
89
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,420
But that giant, he looks somehow familiar.
90
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,923
I'm going to say this very clearly.
91
00:04:58,006 --> 00:05:00,884
- I choose the giant.
- Your choice is made.
92
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:02,344
[Puss sighs]
93
00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:06,389
- [Toby] Fee, fi, fo, fum!
- [rumbling]
94
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,975
I smell a cat and I want some gum.
95
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:11,311
Toby, why are you a giant?
96
00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,230
Who is this Toby?
97
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,357
I am a fearsome giant.
98
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,068
I have stepped on so many people.
99
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,861
Not always on purpose.
100
00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:22,948
Sometimes it's just, like, "oops,"
and they go "squish"!
101
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:28,578
Anyway, I want gum!
102
00:05:28,662 --> 00:05:30,705
[grunts] Fiendish.
103
00:05:30,789 --> 00:05:35,168
This Storyteller uses my own friends
to populate his diabolical world.
104
00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:38,088
Apparently, he's too lazy
to come up with new characters.
105
00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:40,632
[Storyteller]
It's not laziness, it's recycling.
106
00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:42,717
I said I want gum! [echoing]
107
00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:44,302
[Puss grunting]
108
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:48,473
I am afraid I have no gum, but there
may be a peppery-mint in here somewhere.
109
00:05:48,557 --> 00:05:51,101
But I must warn you,
things stored in my hat
110
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,937
tend not to remain
at the peak of freshness for...
111
00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:56,523
[grunts]
112
00:05:57,107 --> 00:05:59,651
[strained] Perhaps the other choice
would have been better.
113
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,236
Can we go back?
114
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:04,823
[Storyteller]
Yes. I grant you a Goldilocks do-over.
115
00:06:10,745 --> 00:06:13,915
Thank you.
But this does not mean we are friends.
116
00:06:13,999 --> 00:06:15,542
Understood.
117
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:20,296
Hmm.
118
00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:24,843
Ah-ha!
119
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:28,263
This is the story of
Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
120
00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:32,225
I have but to go through the events
of this story and I will reach the end.
121
00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,811
Easy-peasy, ham and cheesy.
122
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:37,647
[groans]
123
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:38,732
Too hot.
124
00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:40,984
[shudders] Too cold.
125
00:06:41,610 --> 00:06:43,361
Ah. Just right.
126
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,614
Too tall.
127
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:46,948
Too wide.
128
00:06:47,032 --> 00:06:48,116
Just right.
129
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:49,951
[grunting]
130
00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:51,077
Oh, no, it broke.
131
00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:54,039
[grunting]
132
00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:55,165
Too hard.
133
00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:56,874
Too soft.
134
00:06:58,209 --> 00:06:59,419
Just right.
135
00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:01,087
Then I go to sleep in this bed
136
00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:03,548
and await the arrival
of the adorable family of bears:
137
00:07:03,632 --> 00:07:05,467
Papa Bear, Mama Bear and Baby Bear.
138
00:07:05,717 --> 00:07:07,510
Nothing could be more simpler.
139
00:07:08,011 --> 00:07:09,011
[door opens]
140
00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:11,556
[growling]
141
00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:13,099
- [shouts]
- [Storyteller] Hold it!
142
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,185
You have another choice to make.
143
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:18,730
Should these bears be friends or foes?
144
00:07:18,897 --> 00:07:21,274
Make your choice and let me know.
145
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:24,653
[Puss] This seems like a trick question.
Friends...
146
00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,529
Did you say "foes"?
147
00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:27,864
I said "friends."
148
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:29,741
I know. Just kidding.
149
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:31,284
Your choice is made.
150
00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:35,455
Well, hello, there!
151
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,248
We've got company!
152
00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:39,584
Is that a friend for me to play with?
153
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:42,545
Howdy there, amigo. [laughs]
154
00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:44,172
Samuel T. Bearinger.
155
00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:46,800
- My wife, Gladys. She's a peach.
- Who's my cuddle bunny?
156
00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:48,343
[exclaiming excitedly]
157
00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:51,805
- Oh, you simply must play with Sam Junior.
- [groans]
158
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,265
Hello, friend for me to play with.
159
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:57,352
We gonna play horsey rides.
160
00:07:58,019 --> 00:07:59,562
Do not make me the horsey.
161
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,356
You the horsey!
162
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:02,482
[Puss grunting]
163
00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:05,568
- Horsey ride!
- So, how was traffic?
164
00:08:05,902 --> 00:08:08,863
Oh, not bad.
I picked up those acorns you wanted.
165
00:08:08,947 --> 00:08:11,866
That's nice.
You know, Madeleine stopped by today.
166
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,868
Is her hip better?
167
00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:16,413
Why are you so interested in Madeleine?
168
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:17,622
Nothing.
169
00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,499
[Puss screaming, grunts]
170
00:08:21,126 --> 00:08:22,126
[groans]
171
00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:24,713
[yowls]
172
00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:26,631
Ah.
173
00:08:26,715 --> 00:08:28,717
Kitty don't wanna play no more?
174
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,469
[Storyteller] I think I'd alsolike to see the angry bears.
175
00:08:31,553 --> 00:08:32,553
[Puss] What?
176
00:08:33,805 --> 00:08:35,098
[roaring]
177
00:08:36,891 --> 00:08:38,685
[Puss shouts, grunts]
178
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:43,148
- [roaring]
- [yowls]
179
00:08:45,108 --> 00:08:46,151
[Puss grunting]
180
00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:48,318
[roars]
181
00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:50,613
Oh, my...
182
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,991
[flamenco music playing]
183
00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:54,075
[bears] Mmm?
184
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:57,912
[Puss groaning]
185
00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,045
Ah-ha!
186
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,047
[Puss yowls]
187
00:09:11,342 --> 00:09:12,342
Huh?
188
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:14,721
Ha-ha! [gasps]
189
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:18,600
[growling]
190
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:28,860
[Storyteller] You know, I think I'd alsolike to see an interpretive dance.
191
00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,278
[Puss] What?
192
00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:32,572
[slow classical music playing]
193
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,620
[Puss] What is this? What are we doing?
194
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,122
I am not even in this.
195
00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:42,415
I kinda like that.
196
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:45,710
[Storyteller]
Obviously I am just messing with you.
197
00:09:45,794 --> 00:09:47,879
I'm sorry, was that not clear?
198
00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:49,756
[Puss] Ugh.
199
00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:54,052
Fine. I will watch
their ridiculous dancings.
200
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:57,889
But this must be just as painful
for you as it is for me.
201
00:09:57,972 --> 00:10:01,101
[Storyteller] Ugh, you're right.I didn't think this through.
202
00:10:04,646 --> 00:10:05,647
[Puss] Oh.
203
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,732
This part is actually pretty good.
204
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:08,983
I like that.
205
00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:11,027
Well, surely that is it.
206
00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:13,321
You'll let me go now. Yes?
207
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:18,201
[Storyteller] What? No.This is a book of stories, plural.
208
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:21,121
You have to get to the end
of all the stories to get out.
209
00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:22,831
- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes.
210
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:25,083
Who are you, villain? I must know.
211
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,127
You will never find out.
212
00:10:27,544 --> 00:10:30,130
I will. And I will escape from your book.
213
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:32,173
This I swear!
214
00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:34,676
[Storyteller chuckles]
Yes, we'll see about that.
215
00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:37,178
Uh-huh. Here comes another story now.
216
00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:41,015
And whatever you choose,
this one won't be so easy.
217
00:10:42,892 --> 00:10:47,188
Two tales you must choose between:
Pirate Cat or Evil Queen.
218
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:50,567
Ooh. Pirate stuff. It is just the best!
219
00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:53,194
There is no way
I am going to choose the Evil Queen.
220
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:56,114
I heard you say "choose the Evil Queen."
So be it.
221
00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:57,490
No! I did not.
222
00:10:57,574 --> 00:10:58,867
Your choice is made.
223
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:00,159
[sighs]
224
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:02,704
The prince!
225
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:06,457
The prince is here to awaken Snow White.
226
00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:08,126
Uh...
227
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,086
I see. I am the prince.
228
00:11:11,546 --> 00:11:13,673
Thank you. Hmm...
229
00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,675
You are less tall than usual.
230
00:11:15,925 --> 00:11:17,969
Are you dwarves?
Should there not be seven?
231
00:11:18,553 --> 00:11:22,765
Don't believe everything you hear
in the lame-stream media, man.
232
00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:26,644
I know this story.
233
00:11:26,728 --> 00:11:30,148
I kiss Snow White, she awakens
and we are married. The end.
234
00:11:32,108 --> 00:11:33,735
[yowls, grunts]
235
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,322
No, no, no.
236
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:40,283
She despises me. I will not kiss her.
237
00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,535
Not even to escape this vile book.
238
00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,913
So you condemn her to eternal slumber?
239
00:11:45,496 --> 00:11:47,165
What a big meanie.
240
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:49,626
[all shouting] Meanie! Big meanie!
241
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,879
I am not going to kiss her.
No way, no how.
242
00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:54,756
[Storyteller] We'll see about that.
243
00:11:54,839 --> 00:11:56,174
It's choice time.
244
00:11:57,759 --> 00:12:02,055
Harken now, your choice is this:
Evil Queen or awkward kiss?
245
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,807
Even though Señora Zapata despises me,
246
00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:07,143
I cannot leave her trapped in that coffin.
247
00:12:07,226 --> 00:12:09,354
I must kiss her and set her free.
248
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,439
Your choice is made.
249
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:12,565
Let us do this!
250
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:15,276
[Puss grumbling]
251
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,360
Fine.
252
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:19,322
[grunts]
253
00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:20,782
I will do the kissing.
254
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,826
But that does not mean
we are getting married.
255
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:25,827
[groans]
256
00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:32,043
[heart beating rapidly]
257
00:12:40,176 --> 00:12:41,970
- [Puss yowls]
- My hero!
258
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:45,682
We are getting married! [grunts]
259
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,767
- [Puss] Whoa!
- [giggling]
260
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,143
Oh, darn.
261
00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:51,229
[bell tolling]
262
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:58,403
[Storyteller] And so, with that,madame and cat were well and truly wed.
263
00:13:00,238 --> 00:13:04,909
They named their children
Marla, Milton, Blanca, Frank and Ted.
264
00:13:05,576 --> 00:13:06,494
[farts]
265
00:13:06,577 --> 00:13:11,958
A house of stone they called their own,
and there they laid their heads.
266
00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:19,090
And here they'll stay for all their days
together till they're dead.
267
00:13:20,383 --> 00:13:21,383
[Puss] Wait, what?
268
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:25,221
That's right, Puss in Boots.
You will remain with her for all eternity.
269
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,432
[Storyteller laughing]
270
00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:30,893
Maybe, we could go back
and try the other choice?
271
00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:32,937
Pretty please?
272
00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:34,814
I will take pity on you, Puss in Boots.
273
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,316
[grunting]
274
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:42,113
Kissing Señora Zapata
was a disaster of epic proportions.
275
00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:43,322
I will find the Evil Queen
276
00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:45,867
who cursed Snow White
and make her reverse the curse.
277
00:13:46,743 --> 00:13:47,952
[chuckles]
278
00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:50,288
Reverse the curse. Reverse the curse.
This is fun to say.
279
00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:53,541
But, wait.
How will I find this Evil Queen?
280
00:13:53,624 --> 00:13:56,753
[Storyteller]
Uh, leave that to me. [clears throat]
281
00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:59,630
And so, after months of searching...
282
00:13:59,714 --> 00:14:00,840
Ah, a shortcut.
283
00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:04,135
Prince Puss found the Evil Queen.
284
00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:06,220
[screams, grunts]
285
00:14:08,139 --> 00:14:11,601
[The Duchess] I'm just saying maybe
we could occasionally have a conversation
286
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:13,853
about something
other than who's the fairest.
287
00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:19,150
Like, I don't know, art, music?
288
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:20,233
Silence!
289
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:21,276
[gasps]
290
00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:23,279
Dulcinea is evil?
291
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,782
You have gone too far, Storyteller.
292
00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:31,496
Magic mirror over there,
who's the fairest of the fair?
293
00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:34,665
Ugh! So we're doing
this routine again, are we?
294
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:38,920
Yes, we are.
Because I am vain as well as evil!
295
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:40,797
I know, I know.
296
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:45,009
[Dulcinea] I'm so evil. Like, really evil.
297
00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:48,179
I'm so evil I don't even have my book.
298
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,515
Yes, whatever, fine.
299
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:54,143
Of course you're the fairest of the fair.
You're always...
300
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,772
Ay, chihuahua. Mama like.
301
00:14:57,855 --> 00:14:58,689
What?
302
00:14:58,773 --> 00:15:01,234
[The Duchess]
Fairest art thou not, forsooth.
303
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:04,153
Not pretty as that cat in boots.
304
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:06,781
We say "handsome."
305
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,117
[giggling]
306
00:15:10,701 --> 00:15:11,701
[Dulcinea growls]
307
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:14,705
You must be destroyed!
308
00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:17,417
[grunting, panting]
309
00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:19,459
[screaming]
310
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:27,176
I do not want to hurt you. [grunts]
311
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:29,053
You're not going to.
312
00:15:29,387 --> 00:15:33,558
Demon wing and hangman's tree,
let there now a dragon be.
313
00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:37,520
No matter how bad a day is,
it can always get worse.
314
00:15:38,521 --> 00:15:39,647
[groans]
315
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:48,406
- [roaring]
- [grunts]
316
00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,157
[gasping]
317
00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:54,829
Aw, is the pretty kitty in trouble?
318
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:55,997
Handsome!
319
00:15:58,207 --> 00:15:59,625
[growling]
320
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:04,839
You're pathetic!
321
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:07,925
You should just go live in a barn
and catch mice.
322
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:10,219
How did you know my retirement plans?
323
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:16,851
[growling]
324
00:16:16,934 --> 00:16:21,772
You are nothing but a sad little kitten
with an adorable accent and tacky boots.
325
00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:26,152
No one speaks ill of my boots!
326
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,947
[grunting, shouts]
327
00:16:30,031 --> 00:16:31,866
No!
328
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:32,950
[gasps]
329
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:34,034
No!
330
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:40,540
You!
331
00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:42,793
What have you done?
332
00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:45,922
That mirror was the source
of all my power.
333
00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:52,845
It's not right. You're fairer than me
so you have to die!
334
00:16:52,929 --> 00:16:56,015
Pay no attention to the words
of the magic mirror, Dulcinea.
335
00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:59,393
You, my dear,
are the fairest I have ever seen.
336
00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:01,771
Aww.
337
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:04,524
[Storyteller] What a lovely moment.
338
00:17:04,607 --> 00:17:06,943
[sighs] This guy. Am I right?
339
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,195
Tell me about it. Who is he, anyway?
340
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:12,782
I do not know. But I will find out.
This I swear!
341
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,159
Not likely, me bucko.
342
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:18,412
And now, I think it's time
to give you a choice.
343
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:24,001
Will you kiss the Evil Queen,
or would a handshake be more keen?
344
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:28,381
Well, the handshake
would be more gentlemanly. Uh...
345
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:31,509
But, no. A kiss.
A kiss would make a better story.
346
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:32,592
Very well.
347
00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,847
Before we do this,
there are some things you should know.
348
00:17:36,931 --> 00:17:37,931
Yes?
349
00:17:38,516 --> 00:17:39,934
Yes. [chuckles] Eh...
350
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:42,603
First, I ate some blue cheese
earlier today,
351
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:44,480
so I apologize for my breath.
352
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:47,358
Second, I am real and you are not.
353
00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:49,986
What makes you think you're real?
354
00:17:51,779 --> 00:17:56,450
I think I am real, therefore I am real.
355
00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:58,286
I... think?
356
00:17:58,619 --> 00:18:01,372
Stop wasting those lips on words.
357
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:11,173
[instrumental music playing]
358
00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:19,223
♪ There's a cat
So much in love that ♪
359
00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:23,936
- ♪ A rainbow tickles his toes ♪- [both cheering]
360
00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:27,106
- ♪ A lucky kitten ♪
- [both laughing]
361
00:18:27,481 --> 00:18:29,483
♪ Solidly smitten ♪
362
00:18:30,443 --> 00:18:33,613
♪ Flying and sighing ♪
363
00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:35,948
♪ He goes ♪
364
00:18:36,032 --> 00:18:40,745
- ♪ La, la, la, la-la-la ♪
- [sighs]
365
00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:44,582
- ♪ La-la-la ♪
- [chuckles]
366
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:48,878
This must be the end of the tale, no?
I mean, we had a romantic kiss,
367
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,297
and you cannot get
any more ending-y than that.
368
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,716
[Storyteller]
No, of course this isn't the end.
369
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,760
- What?
- [Storyteller laughing]
370
00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:56,843
"The end."
371
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,306
Why am I laughing? This isn't funny.
372
00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:02,975
That was only the end of this story.
373
00:19:03,059 --> 00:19:07,438
There will be another and another
and another, forever!
374
00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:08,521
[growls]
375
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,068
[sputters, coughs]
376
00:19:13,944 --> 00:19:15,029
[bleating]
377
00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:18,407
No! No Little Bo Peep.
I have had enough of you, Storyteller.
378
00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:20,826
Whoever you are, I am going to get you!
379
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:23,079
[Storyteller laughing]
380
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:28,459
Oh! Oh, no. Oh, no. I hope you don't hit
my disembodied voice with your stick.
381
00:19:28,751 --> 00:19:31,504
Show yourself. [grunts] I demand it!
382
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:32,922
Whoa! [groans]
383
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:36,884
[grunting, shouts]
384
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:39,969
What?
385
00:19:43,808 --> 00:19:46,352
[Storyteller]
Oh, uh... Don't bother looking in there.
386
00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:48,187
It's nothing. You...
387
00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:50,606
Wait a minute, this is just a painting.
388
00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:56,696
What is this place?
389
00:19:57,154 --> 00:20:00,574
Well, well, so you've found me,
Puss in Boots.
390
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:03,536
And now you know that I am...
391
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:06,706
Fartholomew Fishflinger!
392
00:20:06,789 --> 00:20:07,832
[laughing]
393
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:11,877
It has been you this whole time?
But you sounded so different.
394
00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:15,339
Mm-hmm. I can sound like anyone.
[giggles]
395
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:19,927
[as Puss] I am a fancy-pants cat
and I think I am better than everyone.
396
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:21,010
[Puss growls]
397
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:24,557
[as Dulcinea] I'm a goody-two-shoes
and I don't know my book is dumb.
398
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,559
[giggles, clears throat]
399
00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:29,770
[mimics male voice] Uh, I'm Steve
and I smell like old dumplings.
400
00:20:29,854 --> 00:20:30,938
Uh...
401
00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:36,068
Okay, if you knew Steve,
that was so totally him. [giggles]
402
00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:37,528
Wait, when we last fought,
403
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:40,614
you had turned from a mouse
into a disembodied soul.
404
00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:44,702
- Why are you back in mouse form?
- Oh, I'm so glad you asked. [giggles]
405
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:47,288
It all began months ago.
406
00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:51,917
As my soul floated up from San Lorenzo,
407
00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:53,711
I saw before me a...
408
00:20:53,836 --> 00:20:54,837
Hey, wait.
409
00:20:55,546 --> 00:20:58,549
Do you really care,
or are you asking out of politeness?
410
00:20:58,632 --> 00:21:01,135
- Politeness. En garde!
- [yells]
411
00:21:04,305 --> 00:21:06,515
[grunting]
412
00:21:10,811 --> 00:21:15,149
Oh, you should have stayed in the story.
Think of what fun it would have been.
413
00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:16,567
It was no fun at all.
414
00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:19,612
I was maimed and beaten
in every way imaginable.
415
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,572
Oh, I didn't say fun for you.
416
00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:22,865
[laughing]
417
00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:28,286
[grunting]
418
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:32,333
[groaning]
419
00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:34,751
[laughing]
420
00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:38,004
[Puss] Ah-ha!
421
00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:41,091
Just as Dulcinea's power
came from her mirror,
422
00:21:41,175 --> 00:21:43,719
your power comes from your pen.
423
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:45,429
What? Uh, no, it doesn't.
424
00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,682
This story is over!
425
00:21:48,766 --> 00:21:49,809
[screaming]
426
00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:54,063
Hmm? Hmm? Uh-oh.
427
00:21:55,356 --> 00:21:58,150
No!
428
00:21:58,651 --> 00:22:00,444
[squeaking]
429
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:02,613
- [Puss grunting]
- [screams]
430
00:22:03,864 --> 00:22:07,910
We will meet again, Puss in Boots.
[laughs] You can count on it.
431
00:22:07,993 --> 00:22:09,995
[grunts, growls]
432
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:11,163
Huh?
433
00:22:12,665 --> 00:22:14,583
[Puss screams]
434
00:22:18,295 --> 00:22:21,131
Some stories are best left unread.
435
00:22:23,175 --> 00:22:24,718
[whistles]
436
00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:26,595
Ooh!
437
00:22:27,429 --> 00:22:30,266
The Adventures of Puss in Boots.
Hmm.
438
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:33,269
Never heard of him,
but this could be interesting.
439
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:35,563
[screaming]
440
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:43,362
[fast, lively flamenco music playing]
31323
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