All language subtitles for House - [7x10] - Carrot Or Stick eng

Move it !

Faster ! Push !

- Quit slacking !
- I'm not slacking.

Is that how you talk to
your drill instructor ?

Sir, I'm not slacking.

You stand up. You look me in the eye !

I feel lousy. I can't.

"Can't" doesn't exist here !

Now, you finish this course,

or you're in isolation the
rest of the day, you hear me ?

MacDonald, you ready to
make Parks eat your dust ?

Sir, yes, sir ! Ready, go !

Are your ears malfunctioning
? I said go ! Go !

Go ! Get down ! Get down !

Belly down !

Belly down.

Move it !

Get up on there. You've gotta push.

Move it. Don't you dare fall.

Grab the bars. Grab there !

Move it ! Move it ! Knees up.

Knees up ! Move ! Move !

Find the wall ! Hit that
wall ! Hit that wall !

Move it. Get up on there.

Don't you fall on me. Faster ! Move it !

What's the matter, Parks ?

You got a boo boo ?

Sir, I'm bleeding, sir.

- Is your life in immediate danger ?
- No.

Then you get your ass
up over that wall !

I said get your ass over the... gaaa !

Aah...

What's going on ?

My back hurts.

I can't move.

Help. Help. I can't get up.

"Can't" doesn't exist here.

Get...

# I need it, I need it #

# I need it #

We should not be looking at
this. He sent out an alert.

It would be rude not to look.

Though I am straining my eyes.

What are we checking
out ? Your profile page.

Why ? I haven't...

that... is not me.

That is you.

That's me, but that is not.

Whoever did this made it smaller.

Much, much smaller.

Whoever did this has a
bone to pick with you.

Ironic, since your bone is...

is not in that picture.

My proof is right here.
You really want to see it ?

Oh, whoa. Convinced.

You have any idea who did this ?

I don't even know where the
original picture is from.

The bathroom at the Carlton Hotel.

The towel. Hotel logo's reversed.

Shot must have been taken in the mirror.

We were there for
Sanford Wells' wedding.

That must narrow it down.

He slept with three women there.

Oh, you're a whore.

38-year-old
former marine

came into the E.R. with back pain.

Now his bladder aches
as much as his back

because he can't empty it.

What are we looking at this morning ?

Up-skirt celebrity ?

Endearingly funny cat ?

Another study about gays
being better parents.

We were lured in by the word "lesbian".

Has he taken any antihistamines
or anticholinergics ?

Nope. And the E.R. ruled
out enlarged prostate,

stopped colon, and spinal injury.

Military history...

in suspiciously good shape for his age.

Makes a living bullying kids.

I'm thinking... Steroids ?

Fascinating.

Thanks. We can wean him off...

steroids isn't
fascinating, it's moronic.

There's no other sign
of hormonal imbalance.

What's fascinating is that you equate

discipline with bullying.

Which means that your
parents either disciplined you

too much or too little...
I'm guessing too little.

It's hardly surprising you agree
with our patient's philosophy.

You run your department
like a boot camp.

As if cruelty ensures performance.

Oh, is this where I'm
supposed to disagree with you ?

The diagnosis of urinary
retention depends on

the particular mechanical cause.

We need to know if there's
a blockage in the urethra

versus a nerve or a muscle
problem with the bladder.

Fascinating... Without misdirect.

Cath him and see what's stopping him

from emptying his bilge.

Oh, not you, Chase.

Sending Captain Micropenis to deal with

what is probably
normal-sized equipment,

it's too cruel, even for me.

Good morning.

And what brings the lesser
Cuddy to these parts ?

Pediatrician appointment
for an s-h-o-t.

Waldenwood insists vaccination reports

go in with the application.

Honey, finish your oatmeal.

Waldenwood.

Is that by any chance a boarding school

or a work camp ?

It's our first-choice preschool.

Blocks made of gold...

Kids don't have to
pick their own noses...

Great facilities and teachers.

And they're known for
their gifted program.

You sure that's the
right place for her ?

Sounds a little snobby.

I've done my research. We visited.

It's a perfect fit.

You'll feel pressure.

I need you to tell us
when the urge to void

becomes unbearable. Mm-hmm.

Sorry, can't make you feel better

till we make you feel worse.

I get it.

Goes for what I do too.

We cause pain when it's the only option.

The kids I work with
at the camp are there

because a judge sent them.

I can't teach them good behaviors

without first getting
rid of all their bad ones.

That's not gonna happen
unless I push them.

I don't see why metaphorical pushing

has to involve actual pushing.

I may work these kids
hard, but I never hit them.

You march them into the ground
instead of knocking them there.

Yeah, well, it beats the alternatives,

which is ending up in jail
or in a gang or... A coffin.

How often do you pull that off ?

Two-thirds
never re-offend.

That's better numbers than juvie.

She's brilliant, but
new to the real world.

Yeah.

Hey, doc, I gotta go.

Let's empty you out.

Take this urine to Taub.

Have him screen it for bacteria.

I'll analyze this data.

Half hour on the phone,

no go.

Website won't take down the
picture. I thought their policy

doesn't allow nude photos.

Now tap the tube
gently against the table

to re-suspend the cells.

They don't.

Technically... I'm no longer nude.

Maybe you should shut down your account.

I tried, but whoever did
this changed my password,

so I can't even prove it's my page.

Well, there's a clue.

She's got serious text skills.

My password was "password".

You're a dumb whore.

Do any of the three seem
like a more likely suspect ?

Maybe one was clingier ?

I don't even remember their names.

Listen, this is a tough time for me.

Breaking up with Rachel,
moving into a hotel.

I want you to know how
much your humiliation

has eased my burden.

Urine is clean for bacteria.

Not surprising, since
his bladder tests show

that his pain problem is
really a nerve problem.

Neurogenic bladder. Could
mean spinal cord tumor,

cerebral palsy.

House is gonna go right for syphilis.

How can he be so sure ?

Rare complication of
an embarrassing illness.

It's practically a House special.

I want to get ahead.

Let's go test his blood for syphilis.

Okay, I'm gonna take some blood.

This will only hurt
for a second. Ready ?

Stop it ! Stop trying to kill me.

Hey, let her go. That girl
was trying to kill me !

Let her go.

Security, get some help
in here ! Let me go.

Let me go !

She's fine. How 'bout we get back

to someone who isn't ?

The patient's in
restraints and on Haldol,

- which seems to have made him lucid.
- Differential diagnosis.

Back pain, neurogenic
bladder, psychosis.

A symptom which we learned
about when he choked me.

Hate to slow us down
by acknowledging it.

And yet you have.

Tertiary syphilis fits.

The tests came back negative.

Several meds could cause those symptoms.

Tricyclic antidepressants, ritalin.

Also other native plants.

Wormwood, jimson weed.

The amount of jimson weed or
ritalin he'd have to ingest,

seems like he would have mentioned it.

Unless he didn't know about it.

Maybe one of those kids at the camp

got tired of Driscoll's
lessons and poisoned him.

Go to the camp.

Check for potential poisons.

I all but ignored your assault,

showed you no compassion whatsoever,

but you came up with a good idea.

Score one for tough love.

Glad to hear you met someone you like.

Weddings are good for that.

I was hoping to get in touch.

The thing is, I'm a bit fuzzy on names.

Sorry. Open bar.

She was sitting at Dr. Simpson's table.

Brunette, purple dress, low-cut.

That's my niece, Winn Phillips.

Your niece ?

Fantastic.

Her info is in your email.

Also, there was a blonde.

Green dress.

You want me to hook
you up with two women ?

Actually, three.

How do you cheat on a test

when there's no test ?

Sorry, not playing.

Go away, House.

I am not giving you advice

just so you can distort it

to suit your own warped world view.

But it's been working so well.

Cuddy wants to get Rachel
into Waldenwood preschool.

The problem is, Rachel's
dumber than a paste sandwich.

And her not getting in bothers you.

You care about Rachel.
That was not advice.

Cuddy cares about her.

When Rachel gets rejected,
Cuddy will be upset.

And as the boyfriend, I will be expected

to be supportive and consoling.

Not your strengths, I grant you.

Leave it alone.

It's just a play date. It'll be fine.

Play date being their code for

way to weed out the paste sandwiches.

They'll hand her puzzles
and counting games,

and Rachel will just sit
there and eat the pieces.

Oh, crap ! Crap ! I'm such a sucker !

Thanks for the advice.

That's the isolation area.

Kids who've behaved badly go there,

sometimes 23 hours a day.

Sound like a pretty
good incentive to behave.

Yeah, by treating the symptom
instead of the disease.

Basic systems theory.

Troubled kids are produced
by troubled families.

This place doesn't even attempt
to change the environment

that damaged them in the first place.

So there are no bad
kids, only bad parents ?

Then why is my brother an ex-con ?

Treating kids decently
doesn't mean identically.

Some kids need more
structure or discipline.

Nobody needs this place.

Maybe we're coming at this wrong.

We find a poisoner,

and let them point us toward the poison.

Driscoll's got 24 kids in his troop.

You want to interview all of them ?

Maybe we don't need to.

Driscoll sent me to
isolation all the time.

It doesn't mean I poisoned him.

He's the psycho, not me.

Tell 'em.

D.I. Driscoll's way harder on him

than the rest of us.

Maybe because he's a
bigger pain in the ass.

What are you in here for ?

Shoplifting.

You ready to upgrade to
second-degree murder ?

Spend ten years in jail ?

If he dies because of
whatever you gave him,

that's what'll happen.

That supposed to scare me ?

My mom's dead, my
dad's never been around.

And after this, I'll get bounced

to another foster home.

My future's not exactly bright.

Prison now or later
doesn't make that much

of a difference to me.

Dude, I'm not mopping
the whole floor by myself.

Your eyes are red.

Might be an allergic reaction
to the cleaning solution.

It's just my allergies.

Do you take anything for them ?

Not right now.

Why not ?

These IV fluids will help

flush the drugs out of your system.

You know which of the kids dosed me ?

It's not medically relevant.

Look, I'm not gonna hurt him.

But I get why you're scared of me.

I'm real sorry about this morning.

No apology necessary. You're ill.

You didn't know what you were doing.

I used to be a real screwup.

The military taught me that actions

always have consequences.

Part of being a man is accepting them.

And after all the times
I've said that to the kids,

an apology is necessary.

Are you okay ?

My heart's kinda racing.

I got it.

Heart rate is 170. P.A.T.
until proven otherwise,

we've gotta slow it down. Six milligrams

adenosine, IV bolus.

Tell the nurse to get in here

with the crash cart.

Pushing fluid sent his
heart into overdrive.

It took three doses of adenosine

to get it under control.

Treating him for antihistamine toxicity

revealed a new symptom,

Which revealed that he didn't have

antihistamine toxicity
in the first place.

House, where are you ?

Playground. Great place to meet chicks.

Their moms too.

Tachycardia could be a humoral effect...

mastocytosis.

We'd see other GI

or cutaneous symptoms.

Pancreatic insulinoma.

It would cause bladder problems,

unlike pheochromocytoma.

Well done, Chase.

Now, turn off your phone.

You heard that ? It's on vibrate.

I'm assuming it's been ringing

almost nonstop since you
changed your status update

to "nothing lights my fire

"like a lady of size...

less than three bills,
don't bother calling".

Followed by your cell number.

No, no, no, you're right.

This is in no way clever and hysterical.

Before you start
rolling anyone in flour,

work the patient out for a pheo.

Adrenaline pituitary scans,
24-hour urine collection.

How soon after the admissions session

did the child get sick ?

The kid barely got home
before she collapsed.

Her parents are a wreck.
Desperate for answers.

Have you experienced any symptoms,

or does someone else
oversee these sessions ?

The teachers supervise.

No one's mentioned feeling sick.

I'd love to call the
family and offer my support.

Sorry, I can't reveal names.

Doctor-patient confidentiality.

So this is where all the
admissions play dates happen ?

She wouldn't have been in another room ?

This is where we have them all.

Maybe, to be safe, we
get rid of these toys.

No, no, no, don't do that.

I'll tell you if anything's toxic.

For now, you should
minimize your exposure.

I'm supposed to be supervised.

The scan is pre-programmed.

There's no risk to the patient.

You're literally gonna sit
here, watch the monitor,

and chat with him if he gets lonely.

Uh... Still.

Report me.

How you doing in there ?

You shouldn't bother
trying to protect Landon.

I know he's the one who drugged me.

The antihistamines
aren't what got you sick.

Doesn't change the fact that he did it.

I tried everything with that kid.

I just...

Can't break through.

It's clear you care about him.

Have you tried telling him that ?

You gotta understand something.

These kids, they're all manipulators.

As much as I care about all of them,

I can't... I can't show them that

unless there's some mutual respect.

Otherwise... forget those other kids.

Think about this kid.

He watched his mother get sick and die.

He's never known his dad.

Who knows how long it's been

since anyone's taken care of him,

or if there's ever been a man around

with any degree of consistency ?

I believe that you're on his side.

I'm betting it would help if he did.

You are a beautiful
man. Can I leave now ?

I know where all three women are,

but I'd like to avoid
the additional humiliation

of falsely accusing any of them.

You I.D.Ed the hotel off this.

I'm hoping there's another
clue in there somewhere.

We could enhance the image.

Maybe her face is reflected

in that gleam off your butt cheek.

Or maybe it's time to chalk this up

to the hazards of being a player.

Your zipper problems just
blew up your marriage.

Don't move.

Unlike me, you've had the decency

not to cheat on anyone,

but you haven't been giving much thought

to who these women are,
how they might feel.

Obviously, you hurt one of them.

Emotionally, you hurt her,

because physically, how
would you even know ?

Looks like your shorty is a shorty.

You're early. Dinner's not ready.

Oh... Okay.

Rachel and I will go play in her room.

Really ?

I'm hungry. Go cook.

All right, you little lump of clay...

Rachel. Rachel...

It's a new toy.

What kid doesn't like new toys ?

A moron, that's who.

Okay, look at the pretty colors.

Now, what color is this ?

Hmm ?

Orange.

Yes, that is orange.
What color is this ?

Okay, blocks going
away. Bye-bye blocks.

Next time, reinforce the levees.

Bad Corps of Army Engineers. Bad !

What's this ?

Rings !

Look at the rings.

Now, the goal of this game is...

To not kill you.

Why are you here ?

Wait, did you give me an std ?

No, I did not. Don't deflect.

That picture was taken
by someone your height.

Just take it down. What picture ?

Fine. Play it that way.

So, uh...

You really like kittens, huh ?

Yeah. You said you did too.

No wonder you're pissed.

'Cause that is not you.
And I didn't take it.

Did you mean my height
with heels or without ?

You weren't wearing heels
when we were in that room...

oh, yes, you were.

I started to take them off,

and then you asked
me very nicely not to.

Why would I do this ?

I mean, I'm not mad about
what happened with us.

Or apparently with
you and any other woman

at that wedding.

Sorry, I guess my forensic analysis

wasn't as advanced as I thought.

Wait. You know, you
don't have to rush off.

I still have those heels.

Everywhere you looked,
gingham and stuffed animals.

How did you get out of there ?

I didn't... Right away.

Wasn't anything wrong
with her physically.

One down, two members
of the threesome to go.

You should flip a condom to choose.

We checked his adrenal,
pituitary, and thyroid glands.

Monitored his catecholamines.

It's not a pheo.

We had to put him on a diltiazem drip

to regulate his heart.

That means he's running out of time.

It means you are too.

Your campaign to soften him up

so he would go easier on the kids...

All in a pointless attempt to
validate your own upbringing.

Another cardiac arrhythmia ?

Not our patient.

It's the E.R.

That patient House admitted

with back pain and urinary retention...

How do you feel about a matched set ?

We need to track your common exposures.

What shampoo do you use ?

Whatever crap the camp gives us.

Same here.

We need things exclusive to you,

but not the rest of the camp.

Otherwise, a lot more
people would be sick.

Toothpaste, deodorant.

Can't be deodorant making him sick.

He doesn't wear any. Smells like a...

park, shut your mouth.

You're not my drill
instructor in here, okay ?

Doesn't mean you get
to be disrespectful.

I can do whatever the hell I want.

You're not in charge.

There's gotta be a link.

Diet, sexual history, drug abuse.

No. Believe me, I asked.

Those were some fun conversations.

Do you believe the answers ?

I know the answer to that
is always supposed to be no,

but I did.

Not like the kid has had

much unsupervised time lately.

Delivery for Dr. Robert Chase.

That's me.

The camp is in the woods.

There are tons of
opportunities for infection

that not every person will pick up.

Legionelosis from water,

toxoplasmosis from dirt,

brucellosis from animals.

Too bad none of those
explain his symptoms.

"Casey and Sanford Wells
thank me for my extraordinarily

generous donation to
their wedding charity.

Aww. Oh, God.

She must have gotten
access to my credit card.

Nocardia fits.

Bacteria lives in the dirt. They both...

nocardia starts in the
lungs, not the bladder.

How generous is
extraordinarily generous ?

Call the charity.

Explain the donation's a fraud.

And take back Wells' wedding gift ?

You are extraordinarily screwed.

Bushes can make a happy hunting
ground for ticks, lyme disease.

Neither of our patients
have a rash or tick bite.

40% of lyme patients
don't develop a rash,

and a bite is easy to miss.

Start him on doxycycline for lyme.

$2,500 ?

Cancel your credit card, find that girl,

and marry her.

Chris Stroud,

he approaches the 17th.

Stroud...

Go back. That was Jersey Shore.

I'm not watching that crap.

No, let him be your Guinea pig.

You can dose me after
you're sure you're right.

The side effects are fairly limited.

And it would be better to treat you

before you develop any more symptoms.

I want to wait.

I'm not your drill instructor.

Not trying to break you.

My only job is to make you better.

I truly believe this
medicine is our best shot.

But whether or not you
take it is up to you.

Is there anything
else i can do for you ?

Another pillow would be
cool, if you don't mind.

Hey.

Your turn to pick.

Ready, set, feed the monkey !

Well, this isn't weird at all.

She's got the fine
motor skills of The Hulk

in oven mitts.

Do you want a doodle ? Do you ?

Feed the monkey.

Cuddy puts her to bed at 7:30,

which cuts way into our training time.

Play date's on Friday.

What is that ?

Dog training clicker.

Gives immediate positive reinforcement,

bridging the precious seconds

between desired behavior
and treat delivery.

House, she's not a dog.

It really seems to be working.

Does Cuddy know that Rachel's here,

and that you're turning
her into a schnauzer ?

I told marina that Rachel and I

are working on a secret
art project for mommy.

Which means that some pedes patient

is about to be short one art project.

The sacrifices we make for
our children's education.

Who's a good girl ? Who's a good girl ?

It had to be you.

I gave you my credit
card to pay for drinks.

And I gave it back.

I didn't take the picture. Now go away.

Well, forgive me if I'm not convinced.

You're obviously pissed at me.

Because I thought we
totally had a connection.

And then when you didn't
ask me for my number, I...

a connection ? It was a threesome.

Yeah, but you were
obviously more into me

than you were into Nika.

Kenzie, honey, you have a phone call.

Just a minute, dad.

I didn't want to say
anything in front of her,

but you could have.

You live with your parents ?

Just until graduation.

College ?

How old are you ?

18... Next month.

Relax, it's not illegal or anything.

Look, I just need this to stop.

Would you give it up already ?

I told you, it's not me.

My parents won't even let me
on social networking sites.

Too many sexual predators.

Stop him.

Hey, hey. Where you going ?

Hey, you're sick.

You need to be in the hospital.

There's a million hospitals.

Ones that won't send
me back to that camp !

Landon, what's going on ?

Please, help me. Don't send me back.

Those are my car keys. You
stole them out of my pocket ?

No bad kids, huh ?

Did you stop Landon ?

Yeah, yeah. What's wrong ?

Oh, my legs, they hurt.
The muscles are in a vise.

What does it mean ? I'm not sure yet.

Ten Diazepam. 40 potassium.

The leg pain was caused by a
muscle cramp from low sodium,

which was caused by kidney dysfunction.

Landon didn't respond
to doxycycline either.

I think we can rule out lyme.

I thought I was getting through to him,

and he just wanted to steal my car keys.

If only his previous behavior

had given you a reason to expect that.

Why are you putting hot sauce on a toy ?

Maybe you don't care if children chew

on your caterpillar. I think it's wrong.

What causes kidney dysfunction
on top of everything else ?

Arsenic poisoning.

And people do change.

Driscoll took it to heart

when I asked him to think about

Landon's history.

He was much nicer, and then...

Wow, two ideas that
don't make any sense.

If it was arsenic, they'd
be puking and pooping.

And conversations with
moralizing strangers

do not make people
change their behavior.

Rachel is not gonna
do that more than once.

Whipple's could affect
the brain, kidneys, heart.

Not without G.I. involvement.

Why is it impossible to believe

I made a compelling argument, and he...

if he changed, it's because
something besides you

made that argument compelling.

Compromised kidneys

secondary to bladder issues

points to botulism toxin,
which lives in soil.

Got into the kid's bloodstream

through the cut on his forehead.

Got into the drill instructor's

through some abrasions on his feet.

Good idea.

Give 'em both the antitoxin.

I saw my chance to get out of here.

I had to take it.

Don't make excuses.

You tried to steal from me.

Oh, these kids are manipulators.

You can't let your guard down.

What do you mean "all these kids" ?

Don't lump me in with
the losers at that camp.

Seems like you belong there.

It may be your only chance.

Look, I've screwed up,

but I've never been in
trouble with the law.

You said you were in for shoplifting.

Store owner caught me trying
to boost some chips and stuff.

Called my DCS caseworker.

I thought all the kids were
there under court order.

That's usually how it works.

So why is he different ?

Why would I take a
naked picture of you ?

You're cute, but you're not that cute.

Now please go.

You're the only one
left. You're pissed off.

I'm pissed off because
you're in my apartment,

and my boyfriend might
be here any minute.

Boyfriend.

Last thing I want to do is publicize

that I cheated on him,
so why would I prank you ?

And where was this
boyfriend at the wedding ?

Out of town. Conveniently.

It's from my sister's
birthday last month.

And before you suggest he's my brother,

note how I'm kissing him.

You used me, I used
you. It was a mistake.

Now I just want to forget about it.

I just got off the phone
with Landon's DCS caseworker.

You were right.

I'm not what made my
argument compelling.

Where are we going ?

To give your bladder an antibiotic wash

to protect against infection.

Who are you ? I'm Dr. House.

And that boy is the
spitting image of his mother.

Of course, I've never seen her,

but his care worker told my lackey

that you paid his
enrollment fee at the camp.

That could mean that
you're a family friend,

but then, why hide it ?

The only person who'd want to hide it...

Is his deadbeat dad,

who has decided not to
be a deadbeat anymore.

Please, don't tell him.

We spend days looking
for a link between them,

and he doesn't tell
us the kid is his son.

We were looking for exposures.

He didn't think it
was medically relevant.

Soon, he won't have to worry
about his kidding finding out.

Being dead makes keeping
secrets much easier.

Neither one was responding
to botulism treatment,

and the boy started having seizures.

And Driscoll might have been right

that their biological
relationship doesn't matter.

Genetic illness emerges
when people are the same age,

not during the same week.
Unless there's a trigger.

Genetic conditions can be set off

by things in the surroundings,

and these two obviously
share surroundings.

That's a relatively rare phenomenon.

Which is our specialty, I know.

Our patients are related.
That can't be a coincidence.

I just had an idea.

Relevant to our case ?

No.

Sit.

Wegener's can be brought on
by exposure to heavy metals.

Did you see anything at the
camp ? Near the isolation hut,

there were some old generator batteries.

Could have leaked into the soil ?

Seems like someone else in the camp

would have had lead poisoning.

You got anything better ?

Treat with cyclophosphamide.

Go find your bliss.

Now, if you'll excuse
me, I have a play date.

Why didn't you step
forward when his mom died ?

I found out she'd passed months later.

By then, Landon was already
in the foster system.

I was figuring out a way to approach him

when he got into trouble,

so I brought him to the camp.

You need to tell him.

I can't. Not now.

If I die, the only
thing I'll ever be to him

is the hardass who made
him run obstacle courses.

You'll apologize to
me for something done

in a psychotic state,

but you won't own up
to being his father.

What happened to "actions
have consequences,

a man accepts them" ?

I'm in his life,

and I am working to get
him on the right path.

He doesn't need a drill instructor.

He needs a dad.

It's so sweet of you coming to this.

Just trying to be supportive.

I've heard that's what boyfriends do.

Hi, honey. Hi. Did you have fun ?

Yeah ?

Rachel had a great time.
Played with everything.

She's a very clever girl.

I'm sorry to ask this,
but we've had some problems

with parents coaching kids.

Rachel caught onto our
toys unusually quickly,

and she even knew the game
was called "Feed the Monkey".

Uh, well, as eager as I
am to have her go here,

I promise you I would never do that.

Hey, Rachel,

have you ever played
"Feed the Monkey" before ?

No, mama.

She seemed so dumb,

but when the pressure was on,
she knew what had to be done,

and she did it.

You're pumped 'cause your kid lied ?

She's not my kid.
She's a pain in the ass.

And she's a better liar than you are.

You didn't cut your leg
getting into your truck.

The abrasion has dirt and gravel in it.

A bit of fertilizer too.

Tripped in my greenhouse.

Growing my own organic veggies.

Didn't ask. Not gonna tell.

She didn't hesitate.
She didn't oversell.

Took me years to learn
how to lie like that.

And Rachel has it on instinct.

Sounds like you're
real fond of that kid.

You're really not good
with nuance, are you ?

I admire her talent.

I'm just gonna numb you up...

I gotta go.

Latest kidney function
test shows no improvement.

Nice stitches. Do they hurt ?

No. They gave me a shot of something.

That was Lidocaine.

It triggered an underlying
genetic condition

called variegate porphyria.

That would explain their symptoms.

But I didn't have any Lidocaine.

But you had a handful of antihistamines,

courtesy of the deviant in the next bed.

It's also a porphyria trigger.

Wait, so we have the
same genetic thing ?

Yeah...

Small world.

This is good news.

We can manage the
condition with hematin.

A liver transplant could cure it.

Sometimes two patients
share one donated liver.

Would that work for us ?

Possibly.

We'd have to test your
blood, tissue type.

And if they matched... why would they ?

Just because we have the
same thing making us sick...

Also...

I'm your father.

I don't believe you.

You don't think a white
guy can be a bad father ?

Happy to check your DNA.

Do you really think he'd say
he's your dad if he isn't ?

It's not like you're a catch.

You're evil.

Barely recognize you
with your clothes on.

You were at the wedding
with your sister.

Shared a room with her too.

I came by to change my shoes, and...

I found you in the bathroom.

It took you long enough to find me.

Because when someone
starts pranking you,

the logical suspect is the
overly protective sister

of the woman you slept with once.

This has nothing to do with my sister.

Then what does it have to do with ?

If you really have no clue,

then you so deserve this.

All that creativity and energy

you put into pranking me...

It seems like you were
trying to make a point.

You really don't want
to tell me what it was ?

You're a really big fan
of John Hughes movies.

You inexplicably prefer
Some Kind of Wonderful

to Sixteen Candles, though
that's probably because...

Mary Stuart Masterson looked
hot in those leather gloves.

We talked at the reception.

That's why you hate me ? It was fun.

It was great... Until I mentioned that

I don't sleep with
guys on the first date.

And then you said you
had to go to the bathroom,

and you never came back.

Actions have consequences.

Do you seek vengeance on every guy

who acts like an ass ?

Could be a full-time job.

When we were talking, you
seemed like a nice guy.

So either you're a great actor,

or you're a nice guy who lost his way.

Whatever the reasons,

a little negative reinforcement
seemed to be warranted.

Oh, currently, your
password is "great big ho".

Change it back to
anything but "password".

Hey, I'm... I'm sorry.

Let me prove it to you by
taking you out to dinner.

Followed by not sleeping with you.

I'm serious.

Not on your life.

# all his life #

# owned by wildfire #

# like a spark #

We need to talk.

Nothin' to say.

Okay.

I'll wait till you're ready.

You're my son.

I'm not going anywhere.

Wait a minute.

What is that ? A doggy.

What does it say ? Ruff !

That's right.

Waldenwood called.

They love Rachel, but they have no room.

Something about more
siblings than usual.

We should apply next year.

She's a smart kid. She'll be fine.

You mean that ?

Yeah, I do.