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1
00:02:55,628 --> 00:02:57,851
Boys, boys!
2
00:02:58,001 --> 00:03:02,998
Rabbi Jacob is leaving.
C'mon, lets go and say goodbye.
3
00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:27,319
Shalom, my friends.
4
00:03:31,603 --> 00:03:35,732
- Have a safe trip.
- May you live in peace
5
00:03:36,112 --> 00:03:38,340
Have a "bon voyage"
6
00:03:38,706 --> 00:03:43,371
Reb Samuel, please, 30 years
since he was in in Paris, France.
7
00:03:43,463 --> 00:03:47,586
- Please keep an eye out on 'mein' husband.
- Of course.
8
00:03:47,660 --> 00:03:52,529
'Rebbe', what I got for you
they never heard in Paris, France.
9
00:03:52,676 --> 00:03:54,760
One of my cheesecakes.
10
00:03:56,130 --> 00:03:59,905
Give it to David for
a bar mitzvah present.
11
00:04:00,300 --> 00:04:03,487
Absolutely, absolutely!
12
00:04:08,309 --> 00:04:11,969
Hey mac, I don't have all day.
13
00:04:12,266 --> 00:04:14,958
- Let's go, huh?
- Yes my boy. Yes.
14
00:04:15,131 --> 00:04:18,383
Come with me to the
airport, all of you.
15
00:04:30,248 --> 00:04:33,366
Hey, this is a taxi, not a synagogue.
16
00:04:33,458 --> 00:04:34,872
Ok, move over.
17
00:04:34,928 --> 00:04:39,119
Jacob, don't forget to give a
big kiss to our nephew Solomon.
18
00:04:39,188 --> 00:04:42,167
And also Esther and Tzippe and Moishe.
19
00:04:42,233 --> 00:04:44,893
I give, I give. All the Schmoll family.
20
00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:47,102
Jacob, you know what I want?
21
00:04:47,180 --> 00:04:50,586
I want more 'Je Reviens' perfume.
22
00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:51,913
Bye, bye.
23
00:04:52,031 --> 00:04:56,155
Ok, 'Je Reviens'. Je Reviens!
24
00:05:03,276 --> 00:05:06,263
♪ I will see my Normandy.
25
00:05:06,366 --> 00:05:08,716
♪ Dai dai dai
26
00:05:08,833 --> 00:05:14,602
No Samuel, not "dai dai dai".
It's French... France!
27
00:05:15,435 --> 00:05:18,211
♪ I will see my Normandy.
28
00:05:18,307 --> 00:05:21,860
♪ The land that gave life to me
29
00:05:32,274 --> 00:05:35,818
What's going on?
Will you hurry, please, driver.
30
00:05:35,896 --> 00:05:38,606
Hey, what do you want, miracles?
31
00:05:40,665 --> 00:05:44,328
Don't worry, Rabbi,
we'll catch your plane. C'mon!
32
00:05:48,510 --> 00:05:50,805
Ready? One, two, three!
33
00:06:25,355 --> 00:06:28,341
You see my boy? That's a miracle.
34
00:07:18,568 --> 00:07:22,611
- Monsieur, may I take the wheel?
- You're a pain in the neck!
35
00:07:25,053 --> 00:07:27,053
Monsieur, watch out!
36
00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:31,031
What the hell's he doing
in the emergency lane?
37
00:07:33,659 --> 00:07:36,207
See that, an Englishman!
38
00:07:36,715 --> 00:07:39,795
I don't like the English. Do you?
39
00:07:39,846 --> 00:07:42,229
- Yeah.
- I don't.
40
00:07:42,740 --> 00:07:46,770
- Look, Solomon! - What?
- See, a Swiss and a German.
41
00:07:46,841 --> 00:07:49,159
- So?
- Swiss and German.
42
00:07:49,224 --> 00:07:51,827
This isn't France anymore!
43
00:07:55,997 --> 00:07:58,321
Now we're behind a Belgian!
44
00:07:58,368 --> 00:08:01,479
- Belgians!
- Why, don't you like Belgians, either?
45
00:08:01,546 --> 00:08:06,289
They pollute us, those Belgians!
Look at his exhaust. Belgian ehaust!
46
00:08:06,596 --> 00:08:10,138
Hold on, I'll pass him.
I'll 'tres-pass' him.
47
00:08:28,330 --> 00:08:29,718
Woah, woah!
48
00:08:31,873 --> 00:08:34,254
Look at that, Solomon. Look!
49
00:08:34,301 --> 00:08:36,002
Yeah. What?
50
00:08:36,067 --> 00:08:40,147
It's clean, quiet no smoke.
He's a Frenchman!
51
00:08:40,179 --> 00:08:41,544
Monsieur.
52
00:08:41,598 --> 00:08:44,354
Can't you line up like everyone else?
53
00:08:44,406 --> 00:08:47,295
Moron, cretin, cuckhold... meathead!
54
00:08:47,369 --> 00:08:49,706
Hear that? Now THAT'S French!
55
00:08:49,761 --> 00:08:52,272
In the emergency lane, too!
56
00:08:53,771 --> 00:08:58,419
- You got no shame!
- Woof... woof! Grr!
57
00:09:01,420 --> 00:09:03,795
Hey, are you finished?!
58
00:09:05,791 --> 00:09:09,131
- What is it?
- You can see, a wedding!
59
00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:13,484
I'm also marrying off my daughter.
Come on let me pass.
60
00:09:28,619 --> 00:09:32,477
- Did you see the bride?
- Yes. - She's black.
61
00:09:34,947 --> 00:09:38,787
Not cafe-au-lait, but black!
And he's white!
62
00:09:39,049 --> 00:09:40,460
So?
63
00:09:40,834 --> 00:09:43,247
He's white, she's black...
64
00:09:43,317 --> 00:09:44,991
Black. Oh, pfft!
65
00:10:04,766 --> 00:10:07,567
Hey, Solomon, c'mon!
66
00:10:07,903 --> 00:10:09,738
Yes sir, coming.
67
00:10:09,919 --> 00:10:13,336
Let me pass, my daughter's
getting married.
68
00:10:13,337 --> 00:10:16,821
Ah, that's your daughter?
Congratulations.
69
00:10:16,939 --> 00:10:20,687
No, she's not my daughter.
The bride's black!
70
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:23,121
Monsieur, Monsieur!
71
00:11:01,101 --> 00:11:04,130
See that, Solomon? They have cars, now.
72
00:11:04,198 --> 00:11:06,274
Blacks in white Rolls!
73
00:11:06,336 --> 00:11:09,035
- It couldn't happen to you, Sir.
- What?
74
00:11:09,060 --> 00:11:11,511
Your daughter marrying a black man.
75
00:11:11,553 --> 00:11:15,671
- Waddaya mean by that?
- Monsieur is rather racist. - Racist?
76
00:11:15,725 --> 00:11:18,832
Moi?! Racist? Solomon! Racist?!
77
00:11:20,008 --> 00:11:23,254
Thank God Antoinette
is marrying a Frenchman
78
00:11:23,288 --> 00:11:26,730
A thoroughly white one.
Even a bit pale. Huh?
79
00:11:26,964 --> 00:11:29,922
- And pimply.
- How about that lisp?
80
00:11:29,985 --> 00:11:33,932
He lisps, but he's rich, like me.
And Catholic, like everyone.
81
00:11:33,998 --> 00:11:38,234
Not everyone, Monsieur.
Me, for example, I'm Jewish.
82
00:11:41,710 --> 00:11:43,533
You're Jewish?
83
00:11:43,924 --> 00:11:46,708
How's that? Solomon is Jewish?
84
00:11:47,338 --> 00:11:49,368
Solomon is Jewish, oh!
85
00:11:49,517 --> 00:11:53,187
And my uncle Jacob, coming
from New York, is a rabbi.
86
00:11:53,596 --> 00:11:56,055
- But he's not Jewish?
- Oh, yes.
87
00:11:57,061 --> 00:11:59,895
- Not your whole family?
- Oh, yes.
88
00:12:02,864 --> 00:12:05,830
Doesn't matter,
I'll keep you on anyway.
89
00:12:08,422 --> 00:12:10,817
- That'll be Madame.
- We're late.
90
00:12:10,842 --> 00:12:14,362
- Monsieur's gonna get it!
- OK, enough of that!
91
00:12:15,462 --> 00:12:18,709
- Hello, Victor?
- Hello, Germaine...
92
00:12:19,041 --> 00:12:22,089
Let me explain!...Bla bla
93
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,940
Bla, bla...
94
00:12:23,978 --> 00:12:27,661
Quiet, Victor! You're a liar,
a hypocrite, and a fake.
95
00:12:28,332 --> 00:12:31,536
You, be quiet too! If you wanna
marry my daughter tomorrow
96
00:12:31,561 --> 00:12:34,516
- I must finish you today.
- What? - Your crowns.
97
00:12:34,613 --> 00:12:37,348
How do I know for sure...
98
00:12:37,433 --> 00:12:40,577
Shh! How do I know you
were alone in Deauville?
99
00:12:40,632 --> 00:12:42,092
She's madly jealous!
100
00:12:42,133 --> 00:12:44,638
With good reason.
Monsieur, is such a hunk.
101
00:12:44,663 --> 00:12:45,548
Hello, Victor?
102
00:12:45,573 --> 00:12:47,949
I forbid you to hang up.
103
00:12:48,467 --> 00:12:51,843
Fine, wait. Wait now. Wait
104
00:12:56,303 --> 00:12:58,887
Damn! Watch the road!
105
00:13:00,511 --> 00:13:02,431
- Tell me, Germaine.
- Yes?
106
00:13:02,514 --> 00:13:04,697
- Did you know?
- Know what?
107
00:13:04,736 --> 00:13:07,054
- Solomon...
- What about Solomon?
108
00:13:07,101 --> 00:13:08,857
- Is Jewish.
- So?
109
00:13:08,916 --> 00:13:10,609
The truck, the truck!
110
00:13:29,657 --> 00:13:31,865
Solomon? Solomon!
111
00:13:32,317 --> 00:13:33,901
Hey, Solomon!
112
00:13:51,992 --> 00:13:53,784
There he is.
113
00:14:18,602 --> 00:14:19,935
Garcon?
114
00:14:20,485 --> 00:14:22,985
A peppermint cordial.
115
00:14:31,615 --> 00:14:33,606
M. Slimane.
116
00:14:34,307 --> 00:14:37,624
Telephone for M. Slimane.
117
00:14:38,297 --> 00:14:40,090
That's me.
118
00:14:52,734 --> 00:14:55,011
Booth 2, Monsieur.
119
00:15:02,756 --> 00:15:03,888
Hello?
120
00:15:03,927 --> 00:15:06,752
- Mohammed Larbi Slimane?
- That's me.
121
00:15:06,790 --> 00:15:08,556
Nobody's meeting you.
122
00:15:08,657 --> 00:15:11,692
- You fell into our trap, Slimane.
- Who is this?
123
00:15:11,779 --> 00:15:14,791
- Fares is waiting in front of 'Les Deux Magots'.
- Fares?
124
00:15:14,815 --> 00:15:17,733
You're not getting out of here alive.
125
00:15:17,852 --> 00:15:20,902
And your revolution ... *arkoum!
126
00:15:21,878 --> 00:15:23,227
Hello?
127
00:15:24,359 --> 00:15:25,842
Hello!
128
00:15:31,307 --> 00:15:33,386
In 30 seconds he'll come out.
129
00:15:33,446 --> 00:15:36,532
He'll see me, and try
to run out the back.
130
00:15:36,586 --> 00:15:39,920
Colonel we can't snatch him
in Saint Germain de Pres!
131
00:15:39,945 --> 00:15:42,560
- We had him earlier!
- Shut up!
132
00:15:43,690 --> 00:15:46,297
Hurry, go wait on the other side.
133
00:16:01,388 --> 00:16:02,919
Fares.
134
00:16:57,301 --> 00:16:58,845
Hurry!
135
00:16:58,969 --> 00:17:00,595
Drive.
136
00:17:15,876 --> 00:17:17,169
Hello?
137
00:17:18,538 --> 00:17:20,230
Hello? Hello!
138
00:17:20,319 --> 00:17:22,705
Mademoiselle, don't hang up
139
00:17:23,715 --> 00:17:25,066
Hello!
140
00:17:25,274 --> 00:17:26,961
Move, you!
141
00:17:27,042 --> 00:17:30,429
Arrange to send a tow truck
immediately.
142
00:17:30,595 --> 00:17:33,481
A tug boat, more likely.
143
00:17:33,995 --> 00:17:35,220
Help me!
144
00:17:35,269 --> 00:17:38,187
Pull! Don't make such a fuss.
145
00:17:38,312 --> 00:17:40,505
Hello, hello! What?
146
00:17:40,808 --> 00:17:43,501
A strike? That's all I need!
147
00:17:43,767 --> 00:17:47,144
- My factory' on strike.
- Me too. I'm on strike.
148
00:17:47,236 --> 00:17:49,284
I'm fed up, I've had it!
149
00:17:49,476 --> 00:17:51,850
What did you say? What? What?
150
00:17:51,965 --> 00:17:54,362
- Fed up!
- Take that!
151
00:17:54,678 --> 00:17:58,533
Hello, I forbid them
to strike, you hear?
152
00:17:58,822 --> 00:18:01,387
No! I'm telling you, no.
153
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,262
Listen, just do as usual.
154
00:18:04,348 --> 00:18:07,767
You promise everything,
and I give nothing.
155
00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,968
Solomon, a car!
156
00:18:10,085 --> 00:18:11,474
Aah!
157
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:14,440
Hey! Hey!
158
00:18:16,134 --> 00:18:20,930
Hey, hey! Stop, stop.
159
00:18:27,152 --> 00:18:30,116
Punks, egoists, dirty bastards!
160
00:18:32,106 --> 00:18:34,092
Straight, then first on the left.
161
00:18:34,134 --> 00:18:36,683
The factory's at the end of the lane.
162
00:18:37,650 --> 00:18:41,545
Night is falling. We must
absolutely find a tow truck.
163
00:18:41,855 --> 00:18:43,488
- Solomon.
- Yes sir.
164
00:18:43,598 --> 00:18:47,103
Turn on the lights
so they can find us easier.
165
00:18:47,193 --> 00:18:49,116
- No, Sir.
- What?
166
00:18:49,156 --> 00:18:52,131
I'm not allowed to put the lights on.
167
00:18:52,236 --> 00:18:56,188
- Sir knows, I can't work on Saturday.
- But, it's Friday.
168
00:18:56,212 --> 00:18:59,177
For us Sabbath starts
Friday at sundown.
169
00:18:59,246 --> 00:19:01,904
And on Sabbath I can't work.
170
00:19:06,142 --> 00:19:09,558
Let's go, my beloved, *♪ Lechah dodi,
171
00:19:09,642 --> 00:19:13,402
Let's go, to meet the bride,
♪ Lechah dodi, liqrat kallah
172
00:19:13,472 --> 00:19:17,648
let's welcome the presence of Shabbat
♪ p'nei shabat neqabelah
173
00:19:17,702 --> 00:19:21,582
♪ Lechah dodi, liqrat kallah
174
00:19:21,790 --> 00:19:24,943
♪ p'nei shabat neqabelah*
175
00:19:25,273 --> 00:19:29,188
Say, Solomon, can't you make
an exception tonight?
176
00:19:29,273 --> 00:19:32,066
I'll give you two
Sabbaths off next week.
177
00:19:32,121 --> 00:19:34,765
Evidently, Sir doesn't
know the tradition.
178
00:19:34,790 --> 00:19:39,121
I don't know any of your
pantomimes and I'm proud of it!
179
00:19:40,816 --> 00:19:43,259
Sir isn't allowed to
eat meat on Friday.
180
00:19:43,323 --> 00:19:46,957
I'm not allowed to use electricity
Saturday. It's no dumber.
181
00:19:47,005 --> 00:19:49,917
- Yes it's dumber!
- No it's not dumber!
182
00:19:51,854 --> 00:19:54,216
- Yes it's dumber.
- No it's not dumber!
183
00:19:54,272 --> 00:19:56,977
I tell you it is, and
give a week's notice!
184
00:19:57,023 --> 00:20:01,383
- Have your Sabbath every night!
- Fine, as Monsieur wishes!
185
00:20:03,239 --> 00:20:04,884
Get out!
186
00:20:10,629 --> 00:20:13,041
Gdd... dmmn... yyyou!
187
00:20:46,522 --> 00:20:49,529
St Anthony of Padua,
let me find a tow truck
188
00:20:49,585 --> 00:20:53,109
so I can fix my boat, my car,
and hire a new chauffeur.
189
00:20:53,157 --> 00:20:55,714
A Catholic one, this time, I promise.
190
00:20:55,784 --> 00:20:58,882
Catholic like you, like me, like God.
191
00:21:00,074 --> 00:21:01,880
Oh, a light!
192
00:21:02,164 --> 00:21:04,220
Thank you, St Anthony.
193
00:21:21,788 --> 00:21:23,747
Anybody home?
194
00:21:26,191 --> 00:21:28,274
Concierge?
195
00:21:36,155 --> 00:21:37,645
Woah!
196
00:21:38,426 --> 00:21:40,117
Madame?
197
00:21:40,990 --> 00:21:42,738
Madame!
198
00:21:45,926 --> 00:21:47,564
Anybody home?
199
00:21:47,589 --> 00:21:48,853
(Ohhh!)
200
00:21:48,909 --> 00:21:51,139
Oh yeah, there's someone!
201
00:22:01,594 --> 00:22:03,889
- (Ohhhh!)
- Aah!
202
00:22:06,497 --> 00:22:08,823
Aaahhh!!
203
00:23:07,676 --> 00:23:10,402
You'll end up talking, Slimane.
204
00:23:12,782 --> 00:23:15,069
What day? The coup d'etat.
205
00:23:15,106 --> 00:23:18,599
Which city? What time? Which regiment?
206
00:23:21,312 --> 00:23:23,645
The password, Slimane.
207
00:23:24,150 --> 00:23:26,369
You can murder me, Fares,
208
00:23:26,592 --> 00:23:29,853
but you can't pass
yourself off as a judge.
209
00:23:46,085 --> 00:23:48,577
Ma t'Rhafeh! Slimane!*
210
00:23:49,168 --> 00:23:52,055
Halmatek! Smhat fik!*
211
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:53,973
The people are with me.
212
00:23:54,059 --> 00:23:57,208
Yes, but power is at the end of a gun.
213
00:23:57,274 --> 00:23:59,172
Mao Tse Tung!
214
00:24:04,259 --> 00:24:06,676
Mohammed Larbi Slimane,
215
00:24:07,509 --> 00:24:11,613
as a president of
this counter-revolutionary tribunal,
216
00:24:12,738 --> 00:24:16,530
I find you guilty of treason.
against our government
217
00:24:16,588 --> 00:24:19,552
- An toum houm el khawana!
- Habess!*
218
00:24:19,685 --> 00:24:23,395
- An toum houm el khawana!
- Oun ta put.*
219
00:24:23,547 --> 00:24:25,408
What's this mumbo-jumbo?
220
00:24:25,463 --> 00:24:27,213
Khawana!
221
00:24:30,462 --> 00:24:33,036
Gentlemen, your verdict.
222
00:24:37,517 --> 00:24:39,146
Death!
223
00:24:40,819 --> 00:24:44,400
Talk, Slimane, and
your life will be spared.
224
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:49,201
A revolution is like a bicycle.
If it doesn't move forward, it falls.
225
00:24:49,392 --> 00:24:51,556
Eddy Merckx. (Belgian cyclist)
226
00:24:51,581 --> 00:24:53,844
No, Che Guevara.
227
00:25:24,328 --> 00:25:25,765
Oh!
228
00:25:28,773 --> 00:25:30,841
Sh, sh...
229
00:25:32,413 --> 00:25:33,779
Sh.
230
00:25:53,186 --> 00:25:55,433
The police ... 17 ?
231
00:26:13,210 --> 00:26:15,994
Now then, the police is 22...
232
00:26:16,107 --> 00:26:17,620
17
233
00:26:29,523 --> 00:26:30,942
Aziz.
234
00:26:33,994 --> 00:26:36,422
- Hello?
- Hello, police?
235
00:26:36,459 --> 00:26:37,826
Yes.
236
00:26:37,897 --> 00:26:42,195
- G-Get me the commissioner. Hurry.
- This is the commissioner.
237
00:26:42,265 --> 00:26:46,448
Come immediately to the
Yankee chewing-gum factory.
238
00:26:46,526 --> 00:26:49,456
- Chewing-gum?
- Yes, chewing-gum...
239
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,034
And, who are you, sir?
240
00:26:53,065 --> 00:26:55,501
Victor Pivert. Manufacturer in Paris
241
00:26:55,543 --> 00:26:58,966
- Pivert?
- Pivert. Like the green woodpecker.
242
00:27:05,298 --> 00:27:09,334
- I'm listening.
- I had a car accident.
243
00:27:09,482 --> 00:27:11,060
I was looking for help
244
00:27:11,106 --> 00:27:14,761
when I ran into a gang of Wogs
trying to kill each other.
245
00:27:14,854 --> 00:27:17,454
Wogs, you know, with brown faces.
246
00:27:17,865 --> 00:27:20,229
Where are you now?
247
00:27:20,291 --> 00:27:23,326
Here, in the factory office. Voila.
248
00:27:24,436 --> 00:27:28,338
Do not move. We're on our way.
249
00:27:28,564 --> 00:27:31,397
V-v-very nice of you.
250
00:27:33,951 --> 00:27:35,394
Hurry!
251
00:27:38,559 --> 00:27:42,238
Tell me M. Pivert;
the Wogs, did you see them?
252
00:27:42,293 --> 00:27:46,645
I sure I did! Especially a fat
oily one with his curly hair,
253
00:27:46,825 --> 00:27:50,347
and his tiny cruel eyes
and black sun glasses.
254
00:27:51,608 --> 00:27:53,470
A real killer's face!
255
00:27:53,548 --> 00:27:55,850
Let them settle their scores.
256
00:27:55,897 --> 00:27:59,588
Fine! There'll be fewer of them.
But not in our land.
257
00:27:59,643 --> 00:28:02,700
- Where are they?
- Right here!
258
00:28:21,248 --> 00:28:23,231
Smash the door! *Kasser elbab!*
259
00:28:25,727 --> 00:28:27,483
Aaahh!
260
00:28:31,380 --> 00:28:32,890
I got him!
261
00:29:24,278 --> 00:29:25,988
Hey, hey!
262
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:27,869
Hurry!
263
00:30:22,064 --> 00:30:24,148
Aaahh!
264
00:30:44,251 --> 00:30:45,680
Allez!
265
00:31:39,904 --> 00:31:41,153
He escaped!
266
00:31:41,185 --> 00:31:44,111
Couldn't help it, Colonel.
*Ou ana helech*
267
00:31:45,424 --> 00:31:47,066
Pivert, Victor Pivert.
268
00:31:47,091 --> 00:31:49,700
Black Citroen DS, number 438ZA75.
269
00:31:49,732 --> 00:31:52,979
- At the river. 3 or 4 Kms.
- Are you coming?
270
00:31:53,035 --> 00:31:57,093
No, he fired me.
For all I care, he can run home.
271
00:32:02,138 --> 00:32:03,550
Ah!
272
00:32:30,487 --> 00:32:32,071
There he is!
273
00:33:17,643 --> 00:33:19,274
*Ha houwa! Ha!
274
00:33:56,732 --> 00:34:00,485
- What are you doing here?
- Shut up and don't move.
275
00:34:00,568 --> 00:34:04,927
- I must return to my country and you're gonna help me.
- Me?! Oh...
276
00:34:15,331 --> 00:34:18,968
Pivert, Victor Pivert,
he just shot two men.
277
00:34:19,545 --> 00:34:21,770
Yes, a car on a boat.
278
00:34:21,882 --> 00:34:24,671
Put out an APB immediately!
279
00:34:26,132 --> 00:34:27,715
Europe flash.
280
00:34:29,612 --> 00:34:32,492
Mohamed Larbi Slimane,
famous 3rd World leader,
281
00:34:32,517 --> 00:34:35,370
kidnapped yesterday in Paris,
is still missing.
282
00:34:35,395 --> 00:34:40,210
Meanwhile grave events in his
country have cut all communication.
283
00:34:40,275 --> 00:34:42,522
All France is following this story...
284
00:34:42,622 --> 00:34:44,555
Let me call the police.
285
00:34:44,735 --> 00:34:47,969
- They'll arrest Fares and let you go home.
- Police?!
286
00:34:47,994 --> 00:34:51,003
They'll deliver me to our
government's 'maramouches'.
287
00:34:51,028 --> 00:34:52,632
- Maramouches ?
- Killers.
288
00:34:52,657 --> 00:34:54,260
- Fares?!
- Colonel Fares.
289
00:34:54,306 --> 00:34:58,036
- So, everybody's against you?
- No, the people are with me.
290
00:34:58,114 --> 00:35:01,967
- And you can't lie to the people all of the time!
- Sure, you can! Easily.
291
00:35:01,992 --> 00:35:05,130
In my factory I lie
to the people all day.
292
00:35:05,324 --> 00:35:08,236
They love being lied to. "The people!"
293
00:35:08,962 --> 00:35:11,041
We'll sweep out all that filth!
294
00:35:11,096 --> 00:35:15,069
If I can return tonight,
tomorrow, I'll be Prime Minister.
295
00:35:15,224 --> 00:35:16,887
Prime Minister?
296
00:35:17,067 --> 00:35:21,038
I'm so happy to shake
a Prime Minister's revolver.
297
00:35:21,344 --> 00:35:23,481
So much for petroleum!
298
00:35:23,994 --> 00:35:26,218
Oh! No more gas.
299
00:35:26,618 --> 00:35:28,366
I have to stop.
300
00:35:37,119 --> 00:35:39,254
What can he be doing?
301
00:35:40,045 --> 00:35:41,626
Where can he be?
302
00:35:41,726 --> 00:35:45,696
- What's wrong with you today?
- My daughter's getting married.
303
00:35:45,737 --> 00:35:47,824
I'm open just as a favour to you.
304
00:35:47,865 --> 00:35:51,623
- You call this a favour?
- Open your mouth and be quiet.
305
00:35:52,486 --> 00:35:56,403
Yes, M. Pivert's car?
Yes we placed the call.
306
00:35:59,103 --> 00:36:00,363
- Madame?
- Yes.
307
00:36:00,388 --> 00:36:02,919
- Hurry, Monsieur is on the phone.
308
00:36:04,116 --> 00:36:06,432
Oh, hey, hey!
309
00:36:07,448 --> 00:36:10,547
Clamp down hard! I'll be two minutes.
310
00:36:11,734 --> 00:36:12,983
Hello.
311
00:36:13,302 --> 00:36:14,731
Hello!
312
00:36:17,415 --> 00:36:20,062
- Don't answer.
- It must be my wife.
313
00:36:20,140 --> 00:36:23,803
She's jealous, if I don't answer,
she'll track me down.
314
00:36:23,886 --> 00:36:27,594
Fine, but one false move and...
315
00:36:30,937 --> 00:36:35,112
- Hello. Is that you, Germaine?
- It's 11 AM.
316
00:36:35,242 --> 00:36:40,134
I've been expecting you, between cavities.
Where'd you spend the night?
317
00:36:40,214 --> 00:36:44,007
- Say you're spending the weekend with a woman.
- Oh, no, I beg you.
318
00:36:44,065 --> 00:36:48,112
- You're taking the plane with me!
- I couldn't. - Go on! - Nuts!
319
00:36:48,172 --> 00:36:52,074
Germaine, I'm taking off
in a plane with a woman.
320
00:36:52,161 --> 00:36:56,248
- A woman? Are you crazy?
- Yes! Crazy about her.
321
00:36:56,326 --> 00:37:00,576
- What's she got that I don't?
- What's she got? She's got, haha...
322
00:37:01,704 --> 00:37:04,223
She's git big hairy hands,
323
00:37:04,333 --> 00:37:06,172
big feet...
324
00:37:06,351 --> 00:37:09,890
she has curls all over,
and a big moustache.
325
00:37:09,945 --> 00:37:11,510
What?!
326
00:37:11,646 --> 00:37:14,666
Be convincing! She must believe you.
327
00:37:14,823 --> 00:37:17,740
Yes I love her because
she doesn't get seasick,
328
00:37:17,781 --> 00:37:20,406
no grease on her face, no hair-curlers
329
00:37:20,453 --> 00:37:22,061
no steel reinforced bra.
330
00:37:22,086 --> 00:37:25,168
I love the way she sings,
rubbing my back for hours,
331
00:37:25,193 --> 00:37:28,251
telling me I'm an athlete.
that I'm handsome,
332
00:37:28,276 --> 00:37:30,313
and that I'm 1.80 meters tall. Voila!
333
00:37:30,361 --> 00:37:33,354
Who is she? What's her name?
334
00:37:33,491 --> 00:37:36,399
What's her name? What's-her-name.
335
00:37:36,854 --> 00:37:38,783
- Say any name!
- Yeah...
336
00:37:38,932 --> 00:37:40,149
Ah!
337
00:37:40,209 --> 00:37:43,707
- Therese Leduc.
- Therese Leduc is 65 years old!
338
00:37:43,820 --> 00:37:46,279
Exactly. She's loved me for 30 years,
339
00:37:46,304 --> 00:37:49,845
has never called me on the
phone and left me in peace.
340
00:37:50,034 --> 00:37:51,962
- Did you see that?
- What?
341
00:37:51,987 --> 00:37:53,627
- I hung up, this time.
342
00:37:54,098 --> 00:37:58,662
Odile, I'm off to Orly, my husband
is there. Tell my daughter to wait.
343
00:37:58,770 --> 00:38:01,234
Pardor Madam. Pivert wedding?
344
00:38:01,405 --> 00:38:03,765
Yes, put it there, lad.
345
00:38:31,025 --> 00:38:34,645
Sorry, sir, the doctor isn't
receiving patients today.
346
00:38:34,746 --> 00:38:38,125
Police Commissioner Andréani.
M. Pivert, please.
347
00:38:38,211 --> 00:38:41,105
M. Pivert isn't here. What is it about?
348
00:38:43,086 --> 00:38:47,620
Don't worry. Mme. Pivert went
to meet her husband at Orly.
349
00:38:47,721 --> 00:38:50,111
She'll be back in two hours.
350
00:38:52,304 --> 00:38:56,486
To Orly Airport! Hurry, we gotta
nab him before he flies off.
351
00:38:57,741 --> 00:39:00,618
- Hurry up.
- One minute, Monsieur.
352
00:39:09,176 --> 00:39:11,217
That's 57 francs, Monsieur.
353
00:39:12,983 --> 00:39:15,618
Monsieur. What was your speed?
354
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:17,395
What... eighty?
355
00:39:19,121 --> 00:39:20,611
That's 57.
356
00:39:21,104 --> 00:39:24,653
- Shall I check the oil?
- No need, it's fine, thanks.
357
00:39:25,162 --> 00:39:27,058
Thank you, Monsieur.
358
00:39:27,429 --> 00:39:30,224
- Got your papers?
- Yeah, sure.
359
00:39:57,738 --> 00:40:00,730
- What'd you do?
- Me? Nothing.
360
00:40:02,787 --> 00:40:06,776
- Taking the piss out of me or my colleague?
- Oh, both!
361
00:40:06,815 --> 00:40:09,063
No Officer, neither one.
362
00:40:09,123 --> 00:40:12,300
Yes, I'm taking the piss
out both of you!
363
00:40:13,375 --> 00:40:14,987
Turn a bit.
364
00:40:15,073 --> 00:40:17,773
- What's that?
- Where?
365
00:40:18,178 --> 00:40:21,519
- A wart.
- A wart? Oh!
366
00:40:22,603 --> 00:40:26,170
- Aww, that's not nice!
- I think it looks fine.
367
00:40:26,255 --> 00:40:29,058
Oh, no. Quite ugly...
368
00:40:29,602 --> 00:40:33,527
Look, two huge hairs sticking out.
369
00:40:33,717 --> 00:40:35,818
- Yeah?
- Doesn't it hurt?
370
00:40:35,843 --> 00:40:37,604
- No.
- It doesn't?
371
00:40:37,639 --> 00:40:39,477
And if I do this?
372
00:40:41,892 --> 00:40:45,505
That's gotta hurt, dammit, huh?
373
00:40:45,708 --> 00:40:48,711
What's this about? Papers, now!
374
00:40:48,789 --> 00:40:51,841
I always drive without them.
No drivers license,
375
00:40:51,919 --> 00:40:55,282
no grey slip, no sticker, no insurance.
Arrest me.
376
00:40:55,361 --> 00:40:58,208
- You'll pay dearly for that.
- Arrest me.
377
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:01,955
- What's your name?
- Pivert. Like the woodpecker.
378
00:41:17,454 --> 00:41:19,060
Fill'er up?
379
00:41:21,623 --> 00:41:23,738
Step on it, it's Fares!
380
00:41:23,851 --> 00:41:25,900
That's enough. Get out.
381
00:41:26,250 --> 00:41:28,124
Put it in first!
382
00:41:33,139 --> 00:41:35,238
*Teba, teba. Hou, hou!
383
00:41:44,447 --> 00:41:46,488
*(expletives)
384
00:42:16,924 --> 00:42:21,123
Ladies and gentlemen we are
arriving at Paris Orly airport.
385
00:42:21,218 --> 00:42:22,622
It's 11:25...
386
00:42:22,678 --> 00:42:26,389
Please, gentlemen sit down
and fasten your seatbelts.
387
00:42:26,429 --> 00:42:27,997
Sit down, Samuel (ENG)
388
00:42:28,052 --> 00:42:31,280
- My French family is waiting for me below.
- I see.
389
00:42:31,334 --> 00:42:33,902
- I came for the bar mitzvah.
- Interesting.
390
00:42:33,965 --> 00:42:37,032
The communion, of my
nephew, little David.
391
00:42:37,157 --> 00:42:39,091
He's already thirteen.
392
00:42:40,834 --> 00:42:42,496
Ah, Samuel.
393
00:42:44,836 --> 00:42:48,526
David, don't start your nonsense.
Go there and be quiet!
394
00:42:50,359 --> 00:42:52,877
Mom, how will we recognise uncle Jacob?
395
00:42:52,902 --> 00:42:56,743
No one's seen him except
grandma Tzipe and she can't see.
396
00:42:56,798 --> 00:42:58,830
Waddaya mean I can't hear?!
397
00:42:58,901 --> 00:43:03,331
To honor Uncle Jacod we shoulda got
Solomon to drive him in his boss' car.
398
00:43:03,339 --> 00:43:06,044
He can't. He got canned yesterday.
399
00:43:06,154 --> 00:43:09,661
- What?
- His boss fired him yesterday.
400
00:43:09,736 --> 00:43:15,154
I always said M. Piverte
is a very nice man!
401
00:43:18,589 --> 00:43:21,890
Don't push! Why must I bring my case?
402
00:43:21,915 --> 00:43:25,400
- 'Cause we're both going.
- No, you go do your revolution
403
00:43:25,407 --> 00:43:27,743
I'll go marry off my daughter.
404
00:43:27,782 --> 00:43:30,759
If things get ugly, you can serve
as my hostage. Move!
405
00:43:36,738 --> 00:43:40,630
Arriving from Frankfurt, flight AF-741,
406
00:43:40,801 --> 00:43:42,690
gate 45.
407
00:43:52,539 --> 00:43:54,707
No funny faces or you're dead.
408
00:43:54,795 --> 00:43:57,433
- I never pull funny faces!
- Stop it!
409
00:43:57,487 --> 00:44:00,022
- Look at him. Look!
- What?
410
00:44:00,112 --> 00:44:01,952
The security guard.
411
00:44:02,170 --> 00:44:04,489
He's huge. I'm puny.
412
00:44:04,846 --> 00:44:07,548
That's a proper hostage!
413
00:44:33,189 --> 00:44:35,913
- What is it?
- See that? - What?
414
00:44:35,958 --> 00:44:38,199
- She's a redhead.
- So?
415
00:44:41,103 --> 00:44:42,936
Be good baby.
416
00:44:47,409 --> 00:44:50,281
How lovely! Cute.
417
00:44:50,696 --> 00:44:52,248
Whoops!
418
00:44:52,999 --> 00:44:55,027
What's his name?
419
00:45:01,956 --> 00:45:03,798
Do you have a light?
420
00:45:10,169 --> 00:45:12,343
Of course he has a light!
421
00:45:18,877 --> 00:45:20,594
Take that!
422
00:45:21,065 --> 00:45:23,545
You think that's funny, imbecile?
423
00:45:23,585 --> 00:45:25,012
Imbecile!
424
00:45:56,374 --> 00:45:57,815
There it is!
425
00:45:57,909 --> 00:46:00,601
The plane from New York just landed.
426
00:46:00,664 --> 00:46:02,597
Hurry, you're too slow!
427
00:46:02,655 --> 00:46:05,112
We have time, it won't fly away.
428
00:46:05,159 --> 00:46:06,719
Hurry!
429
00:46:08,182 --> 00:46:10,588
- David, come here.
- Hurry up.
430
00:46:10,627 --> 00:46:12,282
Look, cheri!
431
00:46:12,331 --> 00:46:15,216
Look, there he is. It must be him.
432
00:46:15,295 --> 00:46:18,130
Jacob, uncle Jacob!
433
00:46:18,574 --> 00:46:21,191
Where is Jacob? I don't see him.
434
00:46:21,362 --> 00:46:25,077
That's the wrong direction.
Look down there!
435
00:46:29,834 --> 00:46:31,948
Passenger Pivert...
436
00:46:32,871 --> 00:46:34,788
Passenger Pivert.
437
00:46:35,418 --> 00:46:41,059
Would M. Pivert, come to
the information counter!
438
00:46:41,137 --> 00:46:44,532
- They're here.
- Arkoum, Slimane and Pivert.
439
00:46:46,602 --> 00:46:50,334
Division chief! Good timing.
They just paged Pivert.
440
00:46:50,409 --> 00:46:53,019
Block the exits and let's go!
441
00:46:53,083 --> 00:46:55,595
But, careful, he's a killer!
442
00:46:55,742 --> 00:46:58,100
Please, Mlle, try again.
443
00:46:58,591 --> 00:47:01,361
Would passenger Piver...
444
00:47:01,979 --> 00:47:05,171
Victor, come back. Victor!
445
00:47:08,726 --> 00:47:11,083
- Victor!
- Oh my god it's Germaine!
446
00:47:11,108 --> 00:47:13,791
It's your wife calling. I beg you.
447
00:47:13,843 --> 00:47:17,527
Shut up and tell me
where you are! Germaine?
448
00:47:19,605 --> 00:47:21,183
Germaine?
449
00:47:23,836 --> 00:47:25,766
I forgive you, Victor.
450
00:47:25,837 --> 00:47:29,840
Don't leave with Thérèse Leduc
on your daughter's wedding day.
451
00:47:29,917 --> 00:47:31,839
Victor, do you hear me?
452
00:47:32,229 --> 00:47:34,009
Victor, do you hear me?
453
00:47:34,089 --> 00:47:38,380
Yes, I hear you.
Not so loud, I'm coming.
454
00:47:38,786 --> 00:47:40,462
My microph...!
455
00:47:40,542 --> 00:47:45,528
Your husband's not leaving YOU
for Therese Leduc. Gimme that!
456
00:47:51,012 --> 00:47:53,291
- Germaine.
- Victor!
457
00:47:53,405 --> 00:47:56,824
- Victor!
- Gimme the mike, I have an announcement.
458
00:47:56,886 --> 00:48:00,819
I have one too. And more
important than yours.
459
00:48:20,111 --> 00:48:22,911
Oh, it's you! I thought
it was a 'maramouche'.
460
00:48:22,943 --> 00:48:25,191
- Is Fares here?
- Yeah, he wants to...
461
00:48:25,238 --> 00:48:29,476
- C'mon!
- Wait, let me look first.
462
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:52,340
- Open up!
- No!
463
00:48:56,245 --> 00:48:59,476
- Open!
- There's no one here.
464
00:49:00,593 --> 00:49:04,012
- Open, I say!
- I can't, it's occupied.
465
00:49:04,919 --> 00:49:07,418
- Open.
- Hear that?
466
00:49:09,398 --> 00:49:12,721
Sir, is your friend sick?
467
00:49:13,442 --> 00:49:15,381
Can we help?
468
00:49:17,463 --> 00:49:19,667
It seems, you can.
469
00:49:44,555 --> 00:49:47,117
Lowlife! Get out!
470
00:51:05,879 --> 00:51:09,040
Me, as a rabbi. It's really the limit!
471
00:51:10,003 --> 00:51:11,865
Wait.
472
00:51:24,430 --> 00:51:25,958
Jacob!
473
00:51:26,739 --> 00:51:28,346
Jacob!
474
00:51:30,563 --> 00:51:32,232
It is him!
475
00:51:33,263 --> 00:51:34,754
Jacob!
476
00:51:38,054 --> 00:51:39,599
Uncle Jacob!
477
00:51:40,815 --> 00:51:42,103
Uncle Jacob!
478
00:51:42,173 --> 00:51:44,263
Dear, let me shalom him too.
479
00:51:44,365 --> 00:51:46,310
- Shalom.
- Shalom.
480
00:51:46,450 --> 00:51:50,665
- SHALOM! (What now?)
- (Play along. It is our only chance)
481
00:51:50,783 --> 00:51:53,511
I'd recognise him among thousands.
482
00:51:53,536 --> 00:51:57,221
Spitting image of his brother,
my husband, bless his soul.
483
00:51:57,291 --> 00:52:01,330
- Is he also a Schmoll?
- A schmoll?
484
00:52:01,413 --> 00:52:03,297
Yes, who is he, uncle?
485
00:52:03,351 --> 00:52:04,679
Yes, he's right.
486
00:52:04,704 --> 00:52:08,608
He asked who he is
and deserves an answer.
487
00:52:08,647 --> 00:52:10,278
You asked about him?
488
00:52:10,333 --> 00:52:13,393
He's my secretary,
chauffeur and porter.
489
00:52:13,476 --> 00:52:15,051
Take my suitcase.
490
00:52:15,204 --> 00:52:18,435
- What's his name?
- Him, up there?
491
00:52:18,481 --> 00:52:23,312
His name is Larbi Rabbi mm... Slimann.
With 'mann' on the end.
492
00:52:23,383 --> 00:52:25,224
Seligmann!
493
00:52:25,313 --> 00:52:29,283
- Rabbi Seligmann. Enchantee.
- Madame.
494
00:52:29,370 --> 00:52:30,945
Come, Jacob,
495
00:52:30,985 --> 00:52:33,544
Tell me, how are they all in New York?
*Sag mir wie geht es alles in New York?
496
00:52:33,653 --> 00:52:36,306
And what's the whole family doing?
Und was macht die ganze mischpokhe?
497
00:52:36,331 --> 00:52:38,277
- Geht, geht?
- Geht, geht!
498
00:52:38,302 --> 00:52:40,177
- Ja, ja?
- Ja, ja!*
499
00:52:41,987 --> 00:52:44,127
Why don't you have a beard?
500
00:52:44,180 --> 00:52:47,380
I lent it to someone
who didn't have one.
501
00:52:47,554 --> 00:52:52,572
That Seligman is not just anybody.
A rabbi who is a chauffeur!
502
00:52:52,769 --> 00:52:56,818
Jacob, you have a funny accent
in French.
503
00:52:56,982 --> 00:52:58,725
- You think?
- Yes, yes.
504
00:52:58,779 --> 00:53:01,145
You've become a real American.
505
00:53:01,205 --> 00:53:05,325
- You want I should teach you good French?
- Yes, yes, yes.
506
00:53:05,416 --> 00:53:10,807
I know a good exercise.
Pronounce the names of fuhz.
507
00:53:10,909 --> 00:53:12,274
Fuzz?
508
00:53:12,329 --> 00:53:16,046
- Coats made from fuhz.
- Ah, furs!
509
00:53:16,107 --> 00:53:18,171
- Try.
- Yes.
510
00:53:25,626 --> 00:53:27,842
Mink.
511
00:53:29,387 --> 00:53:32,089
Chinchilla.
512
00:53:32,189 --> 00:53:34,272
Musket rats.
513
00:53:38,588 --> 00:53:41,327
- The fox.
- Fox?
514
00:53:41,492 --> 00:53:43,685
The silver fox.
515
00:53:43,786 --> 00:53:47,220
- The panther.
- The painter.
516
00:53:47,889 --> 00:53:50,863
No, no, no, panther... the animal.
517
00:53:50,955 --> 00:53:53,009
Panther. Dit, dit, dit...
518
00:53:53,104 --> 00:53:54,758
Grrr!
519
00:53:56,032 --> 00:53:57,866
Very good, Jacob!
520
00:53:58,646 --> 00:54:01,530
- Madame Pivert?
- That's me.
521
00:54:02,077 --> 00:54:05,648
Police. Your husband
is waiting in his car.
522
00:54:05,727 --> 00:54:07,419
My Victor!
523
00:54:07,493 --> 00:54:11,249
I knew, at the last minute,
he'd change his mind.
524
00:54:11,274 --> 00:54:13,781
But, police?! Why?
525
00:54:14,503 --> 00:54:18,975
- M. Pivert is in a real mess.
- Therese Leduc, I knew it!
526
00:54:19,178 --> 00:54:21,074
C'mon, let's go!
527
00:54:30,014 --> 00:54:32,447
Where's Victor? Hey, let go of me!
528
00:54:32,542 --> 00:54:35,141
- Get in!
- It's an ambush!
529
00:54:36,445 --> 00:54:38,084
Officer!
530
00:54:39,122 --> 00:54:41,971
Mme Pivert, which way did she go?
531
00:54:42,049 --> 00:54:44,888
I dunno! That way, or the other way.
532
00:54:44,931 --> 00:54:48,106
- I can't watch everybody!
- Exactly, watch everybody!
533
00:54:48,116 --> 00:54:49,979
- Commissioner!
- Yeah!
534
00:54:50,026 --> 00:54:53,944
We found two rabbis,
tied and gagged, in the toilets.
535
00:54:54,029 --> 00:54:57,102
- Two rabbis?
- They stole their clothes and shaved them.
536
00:54:57,134 --> 00:54:59,851
- Who did it?
- A big guy with black hair.
537
00:54:59,897 --> 00:55:03,262
- And a short bald guy, with blue eyes.
- Pivert, again!
538
00:55:03,331 --> 00:55:06,374
- It might be...
- Slimane? Sure! Hurry!
539
00:55:16,643 --> 00:55:20,280
Excuse me, this is a celebrity.
Excuse me.
540
00:55:20,460 --> 00:55:23,500
Get in, uncle Jacob.
I'll buy the tickets.
541
00:55:25,233 --> 00:55:26,777
Go ahead.
542
00:55:31,478 --> 00:55:33,147
You're very kind.
543
00:55:33,208 --> 00:55:34,582
And...
544
00:55:34,607 --> 00:55:38,704
you're the best looking Jew
I've seen, in a long time.
545
00:55:38,729 --> 00:55:41,038
Pretty eyes, lovely teeth!
546
00:55:41,070 --> 00:55:44,581
Come, let me kiss you. You're so cute!
547
00:55:46,272 --> 00:55:49,972
- You too, Mme Schmoll, must've been a knock-out.
- Ahh!
548
00:55:50,028 --> 00:55:52,687
Do you know how many
marriages I arranged
549
00:55:52,712 --> 00:55:55,168
on Rue des Rosiers?... 43!
550
00:55:55,262 --> 00:55:57,026
118 children.
551
00:55:57,115 --> 00:55:59,500
2 ½ children per couple.
552
00:55:59,975 --> 00:56:02,624
- Are you married?
- No.
553
00:56:02,765 --> 00:56:06,933
What do you like in a girlfriend,
blondes, brunettes?
554
00:56:07,152 --> 00:56:09,297
- Redheads.
- I have!
555
00:56:09,406 --> 00:56:13,462
30 years away from Paris,
and nobody comes to meet me!
556
00:56:13,538 --> 00:56:18,417
- Maybe they didn't get your telegram.
- 8 telegrams, I sent. Eight!
557
00:56:18,893 --> 00:56:21,723
They must have got one!
558
00:56:25,798 --> 00:56:28,537
- You see the violin case?
- Yes Chief.
559
00:56:28,623 --> 00:56:31,456
And what's inside a violin case?
560
00:56:31,847 --> 00:56:33,531
Um... ♪ La-la, la-la...
561
00:56:33,626 --> 00:56:36,898
No, imbecile! A... t-t-t-t...
562
00:56:38,075 --> 00:56:40,718
Cover me. I'm going in.
563
00:56:44,046 --> 00:56:47,098
Hmm... The address is
'8 Rue des Rosiers'.
564
00:56:47,176 --> 00:56:50,430
Now, I need to find the phone number.
565
00:56:53,675 --> 00:56:55,712
My respects, Grand Rabbi.
566
00:56:55,784 --> 00:56:59,418
Ah, Samuel, I told you
they'd come get us?
567
00:56:59,468 --> 00:57:01,644
Police. Commissioner Andreani.
568
00:57:01,692 --> 00:57:04,969
- The Police!
- A great honour!
569
00:57:05,031 --> 00:57:08,933
It's not every day I meet two,
such sought after, rabbis.
570
00:57:08,997 --> 00:57:12,484
Bless you my son.
May the Eternal be with you.
571
00:57:12,562 --> 00:57:14,535
Don't touch my violin.
572
00:57:14,615 --> 00:57:18,366
- Don't take me for a fool, Pivert.
- Piverte?!
573
00:57:18,603 --> 00:57:19,984
Say...
574
00:57:20,063 --> 00:57:24,114
that's some patriarchal
beard you glued on!
575
00:57:25,373 --> 00:57:27,154
- May I touch it?
- Oi!
576
00:57:27,407 --> 00:57:29,148
Oi!
577
00:57:29,629 --> 00:57:31,236
Excuse me, sir...
578
00:57:44,232 --> 00:57:45,876
- Solomon!
- Yeah?
579
00:57:45,916 --> 00:57:49,088
- Telephone, in your room!
- Coming!
580
00:57:54,502 --> 00:57:55,915
Hello.
581
00:57:56,134 --> 00:57:57,570
Who?
582
00:57:57,984 --> 00:57:59,724
Uncle Jacob?
583
00:58:00,169 --> 00:58:03,265
No, it's Solomon. Did you
have a good voyage?
584
00:58:03,311 --> 00:58:07,004
No, I did not have a good voyage.
I had a very bad voyage!
585
00:58:07,058 --> 00:58:09,080
- Where are you?
- At Orly!
586
00:58:09,142 --> 00:58:11,122
30 years I haven't been to Paris
587
00:58:11,147 --> 00:58:12,960
and the police picks up!
588
00:58:12,999 --> 00:58:14,829
It's all in order, Chief.
589
00:58:14,878 --> 00:58:17,947
- Excuse us, it's an error.
- Thanks.
590
00:58:18,058 --> 00:58:20,156
What's with you people?!
591
00:58:20,196 --> 00:58:24,252
Uncle Jacob, I don't understand.
There must be an error.
592
00:58:28,758 --> 00:58:33,017
It's Rabbi Jacob in the taxi.
Come down Solomon!
593
00:58:37,070 --> 00:58:38,779
What the?
594
00:58:39,434 --> 00:58:43,025
Listen, you on the phone,
stop being a jerk!
595
00:58:43,118 --> 00:58:46,311
- Jerk?
- Today, of all days, really!
596
00:58:46,405 --> 00:58:47,912
Imbecile!
597
00:58:49,083 --> 00:58:50,925
Long live Rabbi Jacob!
598
00:58:50,988 --> 00:58:53,187
Solomon's 'gone crazy'!
*is geworden meshugge
599
00:58:53,219 --> 00:58:56,147
- 'Totally crazy', Rabbi.
- Jerk. *Ganz meshugge
600
00:58:56,456 --> 00:58:59,486
Shalom, uncle Jacob, shalom!
601
00:59:03,311 --> 00:59:06,116
You should bless them, uncle Jacob.
602
00:59:08,012 --> 00:59:10,509
That's why they came, you know.
603
00:59:10,678 --> 00:59:13,941
Such modesty. He's a modist!
604
00:59:16,625 --> 00:59:18,275
Stand up, uncle Jacob.
605
00:59:18,300 --> 00:59:20,849
They wanna welcome you. Go on.
606
00:59:21,019 --> 00:59:23,684
Stick your head outside.
607
01:00:01,135 --> 01:00:04,299
Not like that.
Do you think you're in Rome?!
608
01:00:07,629 --> 01:00:09,159
It's all your fault.
609
01:00:09,209 --> 01:00:12,320
Wait till I tell them who you are.
You'll see!
610
01:00:16,476 --> 01:00:19,385
Silence! Quiet!
611
01:00:20,158 --> 01:00:22,707
Silence. Quiet!
612
01:00:23,913 --> 01:00:26,689
We welcome you, Rabbi Jacob,
613
01:00:26,744 --> 01:00:29,043
venerable teacher,
614
01:00:29,358 --> 01:00:31,473
well of knowledge,
615
01:00:31,715 --> 01:00:33,917
celestial luminary.
616
01:00:34,019 --> 01:00:37,142
Hear that? Now, that's good! Very good!
617
01:00:41,282 --> 01:00:46,926
As a souvenir of this day,
accept this modest 'Shtreimel'.
618
01:00:56,481 --> 01:00:59,372
Oh, lovely Shtreimel!
619
01:00:59,986 --> 01:01:03,659
It's mink. I'll wear it every Sunday.
620
01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:10,856
Saturday, not Sunday!
621
01:01:11,004 --> 01:01:14,203
He said Sunday, but it's not.
It's Saturday.
622
01:01:17,828 --> 01:01:20,244
Silence. Silence.
623
01:01:21,621 --> 01:01:25,045
Rabbi Jacob will speak now.
624
01:01:26,794 --> 01:01:28,753
Go on, say something.
625
01:01:30,984 --> 01:01:32,529
Ah.
626
01:01:39,072 --> 01:01:40,980
My dear Rosenfelds.
627
01:01:46,583 --> 01:01:50,633
[PORK PRODUCTS - ROZENBERG]
My dear Rozenbergs.
628
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:56,608
[BEEF BUTCHER - KOSHER]
My dear Koshers.
629
01:01:59,281 --> 01:02:00,946
Not that.
630
01:02:05,499 --> 01:02:08,541
How about that? My dear Levi's.
631
01:02:13,894 --> 01:02:15,877
Dear Levi's.
632
01:02:16,994 --> 01:02:19,036
Keep the rest.
633
01:02:19,782 --> 01:02:24,143
Uncle Jacob, a thousand excuses.
You must get off.
634
01:02:24,175 --> 01:02:28,061
- The taxi has to leave. - Yes, yes.
- He's getting out.
635
01:02:28,115 --> 01:02:30,822
- What if they ask me stuff?
- Do as they do.
636
01:02:30,857 --> 01:02:33,296
Ask a Jew anything, he always answers
637
01:02:33,335 --> 01:02:36,291
with another question,
to buy time to think.
638
01:02:36,386 --> 01:02:37,940
Oh, yeah?
639
01:02:49,723 --> 01:02:51,540
Monsieur!
640
01:03:00,725 --> 01:03:04,553
- Jacob, do you recognise me?
- And do you recognise me?
641
01:03:04,630 --> 01:03:06,496
- No.
- Good!
642
01:03:08,540 --> 01:03:11,269
We have a thousand questions for you.
643
01:03:11,325 --> 01:03:13,499
Well I have two thousand.
644
01:03:13,555 --> 01:03:16,005
- Rabbi Jacob!
- Yes.
645
01:03:17,563 --> 01:03:19,871
My driver. He recognises me.
646
01:03:19,896 --> 01:03:22,614
I only have one question.
647
01:03:23,118 --> 01:03:26,680
My boss fired me for
refusing to work Saturdays.
648
01:03:26,798 --> 01:03:28,952
What would you do in my place?
649
01:03:29,014 --> 01:03:32,471
Ask him to take you back.
He'll say yes!
650
01:03:32,628 --> 01:03:36,194
Ask for a raise. He'll say yes!
651
01:03:36,302 --> 01:03:39,113
- Double my pay?
- He'll say yes!
652
01:03:39,194 --> 01:03:41,962
- Triple?
- He... He'll say no.
653
01:03:46,481 --> 01:03:49,356
'Monsieur' didn't tell me
he was Jewish.
654
01:03:49,428 --> 01:03:52,101
Yesterday I wasn't, that's why.
655
01:03:53,517 --> 01:03:57,240
I beg you Solomon don't tell.
The police, the 'maramouches'.
656
01:03:57,281 --> 01:04:00,212
- Everyone wants my hide.
- What has 'Monsieur' done?
657
01:04:00,237 --> 01:04:02,231
Nothing Solomon I'm innocent.
658
01:04:02,260 --> 01:04:05,298
They need a scapegoat.
And I'm the goat.
659
01:04:05,423 --> 01:04:06,953
Ba-ah-a...
660
01:04:07,023 --> 01:04:09,050
Hide me, and I'll re-hire you.
661
01:04:09,112 --> 01:04:12,517
I'll give you all the holidays
Jewish, Catholic and Protestant!
662
01:04:12,542 --> 01:04:15,567
Plus every Sabbath and Sunday.
663
01:04:15,619 --> 01:04:17,953
And the Muslim holidays?
664
01:04:18,881 --> 01:04:21,656
Eh? Do Muslims have holidays?
665
01:04:21,768 --> 01:04:25,198
What about him, Mohammed Larbi Slimane?
666
01:04:25,661 --> 01:04:28,642
- Why's he here?
- Who?
667
01:04:28,821 --> 01:04:32,038
Rabbi Seligmann,
668
01:04:32,480 --> 01:04:35,150
- It's done, I found one.
- What?
669
01:04:35,175 --> 01:04:37,017
- A real redhead.
- Ahh!
670
01:04:37,180 --> 01:04:38,561
Look.
671
01:04:40,460 --> 01:04:42,940
She's called Hannah.
672
01:04:43,013 --> 01:04:44,936
Say hello.
673
01:04:51,372 --> 01:04:55,212
Mameh, it's fine. They're all ready.
674
01:04:56,200 --> 01:05:00,451
Silence, silence!
675
01:05:01,387 --> 01:05:05,054
Rabbi Jacob will dance!
676
01:05:05,683 --> 01:05:08,688
- No, no.
- Rabbi Jacob's a good dancer!
677
01:05:34,528 --> 01:05:36,589
Hoi! Hoi!
678
01:07:14,681 --> 01:07:16,742
Ah, Monsieur has a real gift!
679
01:07:16,795 --> 01:07:19,605
It was a miracle, Solomon. A miracle!
680
01:07:21,854 --> 01:07:23,618
Bravo!
681
01:07:27,610 --> 01:07:31,050
You went to Orly, because
you knew Pivert was there!
682
01:07:31,107 --> 01:07:33,502
I thought he was leaving
with Therese Leduc.
683
01:07:33,555 --> 01:07:36,163
- On his daughter's wedding day?
- Drill !
684
01:07:36,227 --> 01:07:39,203
No, not the drill, I can't stand it!
685
01:07:44,305 --> 01:07:45,992
He's with Slimane.
686
01:07:46,054 --> 01:07:47,779
Where are they?
687
01:07:51,714 --> 01:07:53,413
Hello. Hello!
688
01:07:53,468 --> 01:07:57,728
Is this 749-28-27? Hello.
Who's speaking?
689
01:07:57,842 --> 01:07:59,916
Answer. But watch it!
690
01:08:00,160 --> 01:08:03,990
- Germaine? It's me, Victor.
- Ah Victor, it's you.
691
01:08:04,434 --> 01:08:06,432
- Ask where he is.
- No!
692
01:08:06,480 --> 01:08:08,593
Hello? Hello? Hello!
693
01:08:09,753 --> 01:08:12,316
Germaine turn off the drill, dammit!
694
01:08:12,347 --> 01:08:14,195
Can you hear me, or not?
695
01:08:14,301 --> 01:08:15,802
Where are you, cheri?
696
01:08:15,834 --> 01:08:18,428
Hiding with some Jewish friends.
697
01:08:18,492 --> 01:08:20,605
You have Jewish friends? You?!
698
01:08:20,687 --> 01:08:24,304
'Course I have Jewish fr...
What do you mean by that?
699
01:08:24,351 --> 01:08:27,130
Say the police is here
and let me speak to him.
700
01:08:27,177 --> 01:08:30,593
The police is here.
They wanna speak to you.
701
01:08:30,923 --> 01:08:34,289
Hello, M. Pivert, I'm the Commissioner.
702
01:08:34,403 --> 01:08:36,938
I recognize your voice, Commissioner.
703
01:08:36,993 --> 01:08:39,084
I'm so happy to hear you!
704
01:08:39,133 --> 01:08:42,518
Same here. Where are you M. Pivert?
705
01:08:42,690 --> 01:08:44,691
Listen, I know the killers.
706
01:08:44,764 --> 01:08:47,605
You can nab the whole smalah*. (tribe)
707
01:08:47,655 --> 01:08:50,673
- Their leader is called Fares.
- Oh, yeah?
708
01:08:51,255 --> 01:08:53,462
I'll give you his description.
709
01:08:53,550 --> 01:08:55,837
Fat, greasy, curly hair,
710
01:08:55,907 --> 01:08:59,372
small cruel eyes piercing
through dark glasses.
711
01:08:59,747 --> 01:09:02,423
- A true killer's face.
- Voila!
712
01:09:02,731 --> 01:09:05,404
I am at "Etoile de Kiev".
713
01:09:07,176 --> 01:09:10,787
It's a restaurant, a delikatessen,
714
01:09:10,865 --> 01:09:13,762
Rue des Rosiers number eight...
715
01:09:13,832 --> 01:09:15,308
Oight, oight!
716
01:09:15,456 --> 01:09:18,322
- Shalom, Rabbi.
- Shalom, my son. - Shalom.
717
01:09:18,367 --> 01:09:20,615
Shalom, not you, him.
718
01:09:20,849 --> 01:09:22,493
OK...
719
01:09:22,561 --> 01:09:25,469
OK, you ask for Rabbi Jacob.
720
01:09:25,548 --> 01:09:28,144
And Rabbi Jacob, is me.
721
01:09:28,199 --> 01:09:30,610
Is Slimane with you?
722
01:09:32,334 --> 01:09:33,810
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
723
01:09:33,857 --> 01:09:37,408
They're marrying him off
to a redhead, outside.
724
01:09:37,512 --> 01:09:41,036
- Don't move M. Pivert, we're coming.
- Yes!
725
01:09:41,092 --> 01:09:42,630
Jacob!
726
01:09:42,817 --> 01:09:46,704
- Jacob! Have you heard the news?
- No.
727
01:09:46,813 --> 01:09:48,827
Hannah's engaged.
728
01:09:48,871 --> 01:09:52,896
- If Rabbi Jacob gives his blessing.
- Pfft!
729
01:09:53,201 --> 01:09:55,612
What a cute goil!
730
01:09:59,733 --> 01:10:03,642
So, are you happy?
Look at her. Tiddly-diggety-dee!
731
01:10:03,764 --> 01:10:06,280
And you... Mmmmm!
732
01:10:07,320 --> 01:10:09,737
Rabbi Jacob says YES!
733
01:10:11,300 --> 01:10:14,040
Voila. He's so happy.
734
01:10:18,746 --> 01:10:22,093
Today of all days, to pull THIS on me!
735
01:10:31,210 --> 01:10:33,430
Papa's disappeared.
736
01:10:36,005 --> 01:10:37,667
Mama!
737
01:11:00,854 --> 01:11:02,582
Antoinette!
738
01:11:03,516 --> 01:11:05,970
*[♪ canticle: Heb]
739
01:11:36,342 --> 01:11:37,822
I can't do it.
740
01:11:37,908 --> 01:11:40,679
- Are you Rabbi Jacob or not?
- Yes, but not here!
741
01:11:40,745 --> 01:11:44,079
- Play along, I beg you.
- You're safe with us.
742
01:11:44,104 --> 01:11:45,790
- Uncle Jacob?
- Yes.
743
01:11:45,815 --> 01:11:47,501
- We cleared the way.
744
01:11:52,173 --> 01:11:55,336
- What should we do?
- Do like everyone else.
745
01:11:55,399 --> 01:12:00,116
- How does a Jewish Communion work?
- It works out alright.
746
01:12:05,286 --> 01:12:09,251
As soon as my wife gets here,
I'm off to church!
747
01:12:19,662 --> 01:12:22,051
Bless me, uncle Jacob.
748
01:12:27,919 --> 01:12:30,127
I bless you, David.
749
01:12:36,147 --> 01:12:38,856
You too, Rabbi Seligmann.
750
01:12:43,294 --> 01:12:45,871
God be with you, David.
751
01:12:45,879 --> 01:12:49,837
*[♪ canticle: Heb]
752
01:12:53,462 --> 01:12:55,211
- Pssst!
- Amen!
753
01:12:56,282 --> 01:12:59,778
- Pssst! Hey.
- What is it?
754
01:12:59,903 --> 01:13:04,919
Rabbi Jacob's wanted on the phone.
It's urgent. From Madame Pivert.
755
01:13:05,935 --> 01:13:07,740
I'm coming.
756
01:13:18,667 --> 01:13:21,312
Amen!
757
01:13:22,581 --> 01:13:24,569
Did you hear? They say amen.
758
01:13:24,647 --> 01:13:26,955
Great! Same as us.
759
01:13:27,119 --> 01:13:29,370
I beg you Solomon, warn Monsieur!
760
01:13:29,421 --> 01:13:31,876
There are 3.
Their boss is called Fares.
761
01:13:31,911 --> 01:13:34,236
Three killers? Here?
762
01:13:37,456 --> 01:13:41,229
They want to assassinate him.
Hurry they're on their way!
763
01:13:41,276 --> 01:13:43,712
No, Madame, they're here.
764
01:13:55,454 --> 01:13:58,287
*[♪ canticle: Heb]
765
01:14:06,588 --> 01:14:08,846
Mazel tov, my son.
766
01:14:21,487 --> 01:14:25,550
*♪ Ya mod, Rabbi Jacob.
767
01:14:28,492 --> 01:14:30,520
- What's he saying?
- Eh?
768
01:14:30,545 --> 01:14:32,082
- What's he saying?
769
01:14:32,904 --> 01:14:37,550
He says, without imposing, uncle Jacob,
it's your turn to read the Torah.
770
01:14:37,611 --> 01:14:39,859
I can't, it's too great an honour.
771
01:14:39,946 --> 01:14:42,856
I'm even more overcome than you.
772
01:14:42,962 --> 01:14:44,820
- You too, Rabbi Seligman.
- No.
773
01:14:44,845 --> 01:14:45,455
- Yes!
774
01:14:45,537 --> 01:14:48,498
What an honour for my family and me!
775
01:14:49,415 --> 01:14:51,511
Please, Rabbi Jacob.
776
01:15:17,959 --> 01:15:19,616
It's Hebrew.
777
01:15:19,662 --> 01:15:22,578
Read from right to left, like Arabic.
778
01:15:23,612 --> 01:15:27,231
I'll give the honour
to Rabbi Seligmann.
779
01:15:27,418 --> 01:15:29,807
He'll read in Hebrew.
780
01:15:29,995 --> 01:15:33,373
The glasses. And the hand.
781
01:15:33,787 --> 01:15:37,458
There... You read it from right to left.
782
01:15:40,816 --> 01:15:44,230
- Think they're in there, Chief?
- It's possible.
783
01:15:44,386 --> 01:15:49,257
Careful, it's like a church.
So... tact and delicacy!
784
01:15:52,915 --> 01:15:54,802
Your hats.
785
01:16:02,870 --> 01:16:04,748
Fares is in the synagogue.
786
01:16:04,810 --> 01:16:07,302
- Fares?
- Leave it to me.
787
01:16:15,159 --> 01:16:17,480
- Hats.
- Hats.
788
01:16:18,247 --> 01:16:20,122
Hats!
789
01:16:22,491 --> 01:16:25,651
Silence. Silence!
790
01:16:27,235 --> 01:16:29,133
*Brothers... [HEBREW]
791
01:16:29,241 --> 01:16:32,676
The three men that have just come in
792
01:16:32,776 --> 01:16:36,982
are not here to pray.
They're assassins!
793
01:16:37,221 --> 01:16:39,745
- Assassins?
- Assassins?
794
01:16:40,457 --> 01:16:45,123
*They want to kill Rabbi Jacob
and Rabbi Seligmann.
795
01:16:45,286 --> 01:16:50,298
Help me save them.
796
01:16:58,177 --> 01:17:02,137
What are you doing? let me be.
797
01:17:18,806 --> 01:17:22,036
Solomon! Quickly, Solomon.
798
01:17:23,543 --> 01:17:25,229
That way.
799
01:17:27,433 --> 01:17:30,523
Wait in the "Etoile de Kiev".
I'll get my moped.
800
01:17:30,563 --> 01:17:32,834
How did Fares know we were here?
801
01:17:32,859 --> 01:17:38,150
- Monsieur blabbed to him on the phone.
- I told the Commissioner. - That WAS Fares.
802
01:17:38,202 --> 01:17:41,863
What? That was Fares? Unbelievable!
803
01:17:57,715 --> 01:18:01,811
Thirty years, Samuel,
and nothing changed!
804
01:18:05,915 --> 01:18:10,625
There's the synagogue.
And this is the Etoile de Kiev.
805
01:18:13,364 --> 01:18:16,002
Hey, what's going on? Lemme go!
806
01:18:16,056 --> 01:18:17,711
Open it. Get in!
807
01:18:22,052 --> 01:18:23,850
Step on it!
808
01:18:26,220 --> 01:18:29,151
Monsieur, come quick.
809
01:18:29,742 --> 01:18:32,493
Hop on, and get away, quick!
810
01:18:32,611 --> 01:18:34,570
Hurry, get on!
811
01:18:36,514 --> 01:18:39,283
- Get on. Go!
- Goddammit!
812
01:18:39,353 --> 01:18:41,510
- You saved my life, Solomon.
- Ok, OK!
813
01:18:41,535 --> 01:18:42,968
- You'd have done the same
814
01:18:43,038 --> 01:18:46,697
I say! Solomon, Slimane.
Slimane, Solomon.
815
01:18:47,221 --> 01:18:49,416
Could you guys be cousins?
816
01:18:49,609 --> 01:18:52,395
- Cousins?
- Estranged...
817
01:18:52,892 --> 01:18:54,587
Thanks.
818
01:18:54,760 --> 01:18:59,061
Save it for later. Go!
To St. Louis des Invalides Church.
819
01:19:18,565 --> 01:19:21,940
Police. Commissioner Andreani.
820
01:19:26,268 --> 01:19:29,062
Mama, there's the Etoile de Kiev.
821
01:19:29,125 --> 01:19:33,571
Commissioner, we took you for killers.
It's a misunderstanding.
822
01:19:33,610 --> 01:19:35,198
He misunderstood!
823
01:19:35,235 --> 01:19:38,355
- This misunderstanding will cost you dearly.
- Sami!
824
01:19:38,396 --> 01:19:40,176
Cossaks!
825
01:19:40,831 --> 01:19:44,071
Leave my Sami alone
or I'll call the police!
826
01:19:44,135 --> 01:19:47,746
This is the police, mameh.
These men are the police
827
01:19:48,276 --> 01:19:50,901
There's Solomon, mom.
828
01:19:53,932 --> 01:19:56,430
- Solomon!
- Madame?
829
01:19:58,321 --> 01:20:00,858
What've you done with my husband?
830
01:20:00,905 --> 01:20:03,725
- Don't worry, Sir is safe.
- Where is he?
831
01:20:03,750 --> 01:20:07,750
I lent him my moped and
he went to your wedding.
832
01:20:41,004 --> 01:20:43,145
I can't breathe.
833
01:20:45,243 --> 01:20:47,952
Police! *...
834
01:20:50,114 --> 01:20:52,664
Take off your beard, Pivert.
835
01:20:52,769 --> 01:20:56,550
Again, with the Piverte?!
What is this Piverte?
836
01:20:59,266 --> 01:21:01,181
Waddaya tryinna do?
837
01:21:01,275 --> 01:21:07,159
- That's not Slimane!
* - Fi, rai! Eenhoil
838
01:21:07,228 --> 01:21:09,312
And I'm not Piverte!
839
01:21:09,563 --> 01:21:11,365
Hurry, hurry!
840
01:21:14,560 --> 01:21:18,016
My boat, my car! There, they stole it.
841
01:21:18,249 --> 01:21:20,224
Thief! Thief!
842
01:21:20,290 --> 01:21:22,862
- Don't shout like that.
- Move it!
843
01:21:29,925 --> 01:21:32,773
- Faster. Faster.
- I can't!
844
01:21:32,882 --> 01:21:34,983
- Go!
- Aahh, my hat!
845
01:21:35,039 --> 01:21:36,614
That way!
846
01:21:37,058 --> 01:21:39,821
- There!
- Careful, my hat!
847
01:21:40,039 --> 01:21:42,247
My hat, I can't see!
848
01:21:52,054 --> 01:21:54,205
Quick, this way!
849
01:22:03,471 --> 01:22:05,670
Thief! Stop!
850
01:22:12,351 --> 01:22:13,976
Thief!
851
01:22:14,526 --> 01:22:16,746
Oh, no, it's not me.
852
01:22:19,494 --> 01:22:21,831
Not the moustache. Not the moustache.
853
01:22:34,919 --> 01:22:38,139
- You're the Pivert?!
- Rabbi Jacob!
854
01:22:47,089 --> 01:22:51,631
Hello, Citroen DS, license 438ZA75,
855
01:22:51,779 --> 01:22:54,675
carrying the boat Germaine II,
856
01:22:54,772 --> 01:22:58,032
is heading towards
Place de la Concorde.
857
01:23:12,237 --> 01:23:15,068
Spare their lives, Fares.
They won't talk.
858
01:23:15,117 --> 01:23:18,481
No, I won't talk. Not a word.
I forgot everything.
859
01:23:18,527 --> 01:23:21,750
I don't even know your name, M. Fares.
860
01:23:24,309 --> 01:23:26,955
Don't shoot! I have an idea.
861
01:23:27,263 --> 01:23:29,787
Instead of shooting me in the car,
862
01:23:29,812 --> 01:23:32,623
you let me go to my daughters wedding.
863
01:23:32,684 --> 01:23:36,179
And tomorrow, you send me
a letter-bomb.
864
01:23:36,730 --> 01:23:38,660
So, I'm at home...
865
01:23:38,933 --> 01:23:41,243
The doorbell rings. Drrring!
866
01:23:41,454 --> 01:23:43,046
Drrring!
867
01:23:47,883 --> 01:23:50,010
- Who is it?
- I open...
868
01:23:52,441 --> 01:23:54,512
A letter bomb!
869
01:23:56,536 --> 01:23:58,168
And for whom?
870
01:23:58,261 --> 01:24:01,334
- For you, not me.
- You're a pain in the a...!
871
01:24:01,364 --> 01:24:04,131
- So, I open it.
- NO, don't! YES! No!
872
01:24:04,216 --> 01:24:06,670
I open it and paf!
873
01:24:07,583 --> 01:24:12,325
No more Pivert, no more Jacob,
no more Fares! Waddaya gonna do?
874
01:24:14,090 --> 01:24:15,439
That's for me.
875
01:24:15,489 --> 01:24:17,141
For me! Leggo!
876
01:24:18,320 --> 01:24:20,489
Hello... *...
877
01:24:20,558 --> 01:24:21,925
Hello!
878
01:24:21,963 --> 01:24:24,711
Hello, is this M. Pivert's car?
879
01:24:24,779 --> 01:24:27,505
Is president Slimane with you?
880
01:24:28,747 --> 01:24:30,745
President Slimane?!
881
01:24:31,877 --> 01:24:35,043
The Minister wants to speak with him.
882
01:24:36,660 --> 01:24:39,198
It is for you. The Minister.
883
01:24:40,289 --> 01:24:42,179
Ahh! Gimme!
884
01:24:42,365 --> 01:24:44,316
- Hello.
- Hello.
885
01:24:44,582 --> 01:24:47,321
- Mr. President?
- Slimane speaking.
886
01:24:47,415 --> 01:24:49,227
The Revolutionary Council
887
01:24:49,252 --> 01:24:52,731
which took power in your
country at 13:00 GMT,
888
01:24:52,801 --> 01:24:55,257
wishes you to return, urgently.
889
01:24:55,785 --> 01:24:59,243
- Should I mention petroleum?
- It'd be inappropriate.
890
01:24:59,289 --> 01:25:02,198
A Concorde! We could
fix him up with one.
891
01:25:02,278 --> 01:25:05,351
- Not so fast, you'll spoil everything.
- OK.
892
01:25:05,489 --> 01:25:07,544
There's the Alouette 'copters.
893
01:25:07,608 --> 01:25:09,873
I'll slip in a cagey allusion.
894
01:25:11,407 --> 01:25:14,536
We'll come pick you up,
in our Alouette Chopper.
895
01:25:14,575 --> 01:25:15,980
Latest model.
896
01:25:16,027 --> 01:25:17,627
I did it, I did it!
897
01:25:17,670 --> 01:25:20,416
We did it, and they lost!
898
01:25:22,411 --> 01:25:25,995
You appreciate, Mr. President...
899
01:25:26,282 --> 01:25:28,257
that I saved your life.
900
01:25:28,333 --> 01:25:30,387
They wanted to, 'taga-daga-da!'
901
01:25:30,427 --> 01:25:32,745
*Arkhoum Fares, my President.
902
01:25:33,050 --> 01:25:36,201
- No more *Arkhoum!
- Pardon.
903
01:25:36,257 --> 01:25:38,810
Shouldn't have bet on the wrong camel.
904
01:25:38,835 --> 01:25:41,134
Sabres... up!
905
01:25:53,135 --> 01:25:55,474
See that, Mr. President?
906
01:26:02,542 --> 01:26:04,787
That's France! Clip-clop...
907
01:26:05,527 --> 01:26:07,144
France!
908
01:26:33,653 --> 01:26:35,178
That's it! It's over.
909
01:26:35,313 --> 01:26:38,178
It's 2 o' clock,
I can't wait any longer.
910
01:26:38,294 --> 01:26:40,949
Remove the plants and flower bouquets.
911
01:26:40,974 --> 01:26:43,576
But Reverend! A little more patience.
912
01:26:43,615 --> 01:26:47,210
I phoned and no one's home,
they're surely on their way.
913
01:26:47,271 --> 01:26:50,955
- I'm sorry, I have a funeral.
- At least, he'll be on time!
914
01:26:50,998 --> 01:26:53,088
- Alexandre.
- Yes, papa.
915
01:26:53,127 --> 01:26:55,319
The Marquise is leaving.
916
01:26:55,599 --> 01:26:58,814
- Stay a little longer, dear Madame?
- Any minute, now.
917
01:26:58,850 --> 01:27:03,342
Ah, no, I've been standing for
2 hours, so good bye. Home!
918
01:27:03,888 --> 01:27:06,642
Alexander, you sure
it wasn't Notre Dame?
919
01:27:06,706 --> 01:27:08,623
Will we get lunch anyway?
920
01:27:08,649 --> 01:27:11,178
- Better luck next time.
- Piss off!
921
01:27:11,334 --> 01:27:13,533
Papa, mama, what now?
922
01:27:14,244 --> 01:27:17,506
- Two hours late. Two!
- What'll people think?
923
01:27:17,550 --> 01:27:19,987
Pivert is a useless ass!
924
01:27:27,205 --> 01:27:29,143
What's that?
925
01:27:35,377 --> 01:27:36,962
Mama, what is that?
926
01:27:37,017 --> 01:27:39,038
'TEN... HUTT!
927
01:27:55,946 --> 01:27:58,527
Here I am. Allez, allez!
928
01:28:01,352 --> 01:28:03,740
General, here I am! Here!
929
01:28:03,911 --> 01:28:05,560
Pivert!
930
01:28:06,771 --> 01:28:08,823
I'm here. Coming!
931
01:28:08,902 --> 01:28:12,585
Stay, Reverend.
I'm the father of the bride.
932
01:28:12,687 --> 01:28:14,339
You? A Rabbi?!
933
01:28:14,406 --> 01:28:17,158
It's a scandal, Pivert! A SCANDAL
934
01:28:17,219 --> 01:28:20,904
- Explain yourself!
- 2 hours late and what's that disguise?
935
01:28:20,974 --> 01:28:23,230
A Rabbi! I'm a Rabbi like you.
936
01:28:23,278 --> 01:28:25,891
This is a Shtreimel.
That, too, is a Shtreimel.
937
01:28:25,941 --> 01:28:27,773
These are Curlicues. (*Payot)
938
01:28:27,807 --> 01:28:30,261
- Those, too, are Curlicues!
- Aah!
939
01:28:32,050 --> 01:28:33,705
We're here!
940
01:28:33,978 --> 01:28:35,617
That's my wife!
941
01:28:39,463 --> 01:28:40,979
Turn into it!
942
01:28:41,135 --> 01:28:44,015
- Mama, stop!
- Shall I take the wheel?
943
01:28:44,085 --> 01:28:46,465
I can't Solomon, no brakes!
944
01:28:52,045 --> 01:28:55,439
What's that white smoke
from the engine?
945
01:29:12,379 --> 01:29:15,051
My boat! My boat.
946
01:29:16,135 --> 01:29:17,813
Antoinette.
947
01:29:17,879 --> 01:29:19,862
You did that on purpose!
948
01:29:19,916 --> 01:29:21,375
My hat!
949
01:29:21,426 --> 01:29:23,885
My boat, gluglug... Your hat...
950
01:29:25,458 --> 01:29:27,355
Mademoiselle, allow me.
951
01:29:28,439 --> 01:29:30,160
Are you nuts?
952
01:29:30,279 --> 01:29:33,981
Papa, mama, don't start. Not today.
953
01:29:34,176 --> 01:29:36,611
Jacob! It's him!
954
01:29:41,032 --> 01:29:42,538
Shalom.
955
01:29:51,151 --> 01:29:53,865
Pivert, what's this tribe?
956
01:29:53,943 --> 01:29:56,690
Tribe?! Those are my
friends, the Schmolls.
957
01:29:56,752 --> 01:29:59,908
They invited me to synagogue
so I invite them to church.
958
01:29:59,933 --> 01:30:03,568
- Gotcha, Pivert!
- Well done! - Imbecile!
959
01:30:16,236 --> 01:30:18,165
Sabres... up!
960
01:30:36,756 --> 01:30:38,318
Mr president...
961
01:30:43,881 --> 01:30:45,512
*...
962
01:30:45,740 --> 01:30:48,561
In the name of the bonds
that unite our countries,
963
01:30:48,640 --> 01:30:50,646
I'm glad to be the first to...
964
01:30:50,700 --> 01:30:54,236
- Slimane, in the name of the law, I arrest you.
- Me?
965
01:30:54,321 --> 01:30:56,921
Now, there, you're making a gaffe.
966
01:30:57,023 --> 01:30:59,083
And, what a cock up! Haha...
967
01:30:59,192 --> 01:31:01,112
- You'll see.
- Yes, we'll see.
968
01:31:01,175 --> 01:31:04,259
It's OK, Minister I collared
them without incident.
969
01:31:04,324 --> 01:31:06,824
Release these men, imbecile!
970
01:31:07,514 --> 01:31:09,793
Of course, Minister.
971
01:31:11,082 --> 01:31:14,531
- Mr. President, excuse us, sir.
- Ah, it's nothing.
972
01:31:14,586 --> 01:31:16,116
Hmm... you!
973
01:31:16,178 --> 01:31:18,449
- Thank you, 'constable'.
- 'Constable'?
974
01:31:18,525 --> 01:31:20,884
Because tomorrow... truuu-lut !
975
01:31:21,319 --> 01:31:23,051
Truuu-lut !
976
01:31:24,647 --> 01:31:26,359
... truuu-lut !
977
01:31:46,358 --> 01:31:49,827
My veil! Can I have my veil back?
978
01:31:51,502 --> 01:31:53,127
No.
979
01:32:03,157 --> 01:32:05,032
Antoinette!
980
01:32:06,661 --> 01:32:10,451
Where's she off to?
Antoinette, come back!
981
01:32:10,506 --> 01:32:13,598
See that, Minister?
He's taking my daughter!
982
01:32:13,653 --> 01:32:16,009
He just takes her and zoom!
983
01:32:16,237 --> 01:32:18,702
Victor, she's gone mad.
984
01:32:18,780 --> 01:32:21,793
You can't let our daughter
go off with a... a...
985
01:32:21,875 --> 01:32:26,686
A President of a Republic.
My daughter will marry a President.
986
01:32:45,717 --> 01:32:47,582
*Mazel tov.
987
01:32:47,912 --> 01:32:53,323
Of course, tonight, you're coming
to the bar mitzvah dinner?
988
01:32:53,433 --> 01:32:55,610
Listen, Rabbi Jacob, listen.
989
01:32:55,735 --> 01:32:58,023
I must confess.
990
01:32:58,202 --> 01:33:00,735
Voila... I'm not Jewish.
991
01:33:01,035 --> 01:33:05,061
Doesn't matter, Monsieur.
We'll, keep you on anyway.
70708
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