All language subtitles for tooth.fairy.1080p.x264

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Battle One on the boards with both
teams really digging for the puck.

Now, it squats loose and the ice wolves have it
and the puck is cleared out of the zone.

Give it up!

What a hit!

Come on boys! Use the body!
Take him away! Take him away!

- Rafton's going up the ice!
- Take him to the offside!

He shoots... nice save by Grant.

What a hit...What action!

The Ice Wolves are just getting hammered.

There is the familiar chant, Jim.

and the coach is going for the big defenseman,
Derek Thompson and here comes the Tooth Fairy.

Go in the dark jersey and hit it.

- That is an incisor.
- I got the tooth. Oh, I got the tooth, baby!

And the tooth fairy,
Derek Thompson has struck again.

You can't handle the tooth and that's
the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.

I pledge allegiance to the tooth.

Open the door for the Tooth Fairy.

Who's the Tooth Fairy?
Am I the Tooth...I'm the Tooth Fairy!

Stop it. Stop it.

- What's going on out here?
- Hey Thompson, come here.

- I want you to meet the future of our franchise.
- Ah... new kid.

He's probably not
gonna be here for longer

than a cup of coffee till he
gets snapped up by the Kings.

But listen, while he is here.
Your job on the ice is to take care of him.

- Okay.
- Nothing else matters, alright.

Alright.

- Mick.
- Yeah.

Derek Thompson, Mick Donnelly
here first line striker.

Mick Donnelly, Derek
Thompson, he's your bodyguard.

- What's up, man?
- Welcome to pro hockey, kid!

Yeah, is there an
old-timers' game today?

I didn't realize you're even still
playing, man. I used to be a big fan.

Alright... See you later, man.

Mr. Thompson!

Sign the autograph for me.

Yeah, sure. Absolutely!
What's your name, buddy?

Gabe, I'm the third leading
scorer in my hockey league.

- And my team might with the Championship.
- Wow, that's fantastic. Good for you, Gabe.

One day, I'm gonna play hockey
in the big leagues just like you used to.

- You work pretty hard at hockey, do you?
- Uh huh, I play almost everyday.

- And I drive him almost everyday.
- Ah...uh huh.

- How old are you?
- I'm eight.

You're eight, you're eight, okay.
Well, here's the deal, Gabe.

So, you're eight and you're
the third leading scorer

in your league behind
two other eight year-olds.

- Well, one's nine.
- Uh hmm. Okay, well.

See, Gabe, somewhere in this country
there's a seven year-old playing against

twelve year-olds and
he's outscoring them.

I mean, he's killing them. Making them
wanna get run over by a Zambonian guy.

And there are a bunch
like that kid in every rink.

And when the time's right,
those kids will battle it out

and only a handful of
them will get signed.

Now let's say, you do make the NHL...

You won't...Now let's say you do.

Let's say you hit the show right out of
college but the show hit you right back.

And before you could stay slap shot,
you're pushed down to the minors

with a blown out shoulder
and nowhere to go.

Listen, lower your expectations.
That's how you're gonna be happy.

There you go, Gabe.

I want to suck your blood... What, what
are you looking at and laughing at?

- Why aren't you afraid?
- Because those are French fries.

No, I can't eat French fries.
French fries are fatal to vampires.

- Hey, I have an idea.
- Can't talk, still dead.

Mommy, my tooth came out!

- Hey, yehey! Oh, congrats.
- The tooth fairy's gonna visit me tonight.

You bet, let's see.
Oh, you are such a big girl.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm a tooth fairy.
- Thought you said you're a vampire.

You got some inconsistent mythology.

I have a lot of homework.
Can I be excused?

Yeah.

Mommy, it's time for you to go now
and Derek can start babysitting.

Not just yet. You wanna go
and put your jammies on?

I wonder if it would help if Randy and
you had some one-on-one time.

Ah..sure. I could do that. As long as
I don't have to be alone with him.

Calvin is here.
Oh, little ketchup.

- Oh, Tooth Fairy.
- You know what, I got it.

- Look, I put on my pajamas.
- Dracula's back from the dead.

Hey, what do you guys think of Donnelly?

- Oh man, that kid is fast.
- Even to Nitz Gresky.

I love him already.
Like a long lost brother.

Can we just play?

Next to you.

Alright, I'm a little short. But this
autograph that says the "Tooth Fairy."

It's worth ten bucks on EBay.

Ten of these is a
hundred bucks, so I'm in.

No, no, no, no.
You have to pay.

Hey, it's me.
I'm a good boy.

- I'll be right back.
- He took his cards.

Hey Derek, don't the kids have
like a piggy bank or something?

- I'm home. Hey, guys.
- Hello, gorgeous.

You know what... I'm a little tired.

I'm not gonna hang out
but I walk you guys out.

Mommy, mommy!

Mommy, mommy!
Mommy!

- What is it, honey?
- My tooth is gone.

- Well, that's cause the Tooth Fairy took it.
- But there's no money.

- I looked.
- Let's look together. I'm sure it's here somewhere.

- The vampire has returned!
- Not a vampire moment.

- It's not anywhere.
- Well, I bet that they took it to where...

...on the Toothometer
to see what it's worth

before they bring you
the money. Right, Derek?

Sure, that's how the
whole tooth thing works.

No, that's not how it works.

You put the tooth under your
pillow, the tooth fairy flies into

your room when you're sleeping,
takes the tooth and leaves a dollar.

- Where is it?
- Okay...

You tell me when to
stop when the Tooth Fairy

has been here coz I have five 10's...

Derek.

(Stop)

Okay. Tess, you're a big girl now.

You're six. So let's just
get this out of the way.

- There's is no such thing as a Tooth...
- Bingo, here it is.

How did it get down there?

Oh, you must have rolled over in
your sleep and it fell on the floor.

I forgot. People forget.

So then, your big idea to handle it
was to tell Tess there is no tooth fairy.

Carly, come on. The way
I see it, is the reason

why there are so many
unhappy people in the world

because all are clinged to
some version of what if...

Okay, so dreams are bad.

Well, they lead to unrealistic
expectations then yes.

- This is ridiculous.
- I know.

- I'm going to bed.
- Carly.

You...are leaving.

Don't get all dramatic.

I'm her mother. I get the say on
her childhood fantasies, not you.

Disbelief...Fairy...Summons...

What?

Thompson, Derek Thompson.

Yes, yes, God, it's me.
Is that you God?

- You're Thompson?
- You're God?

I'm Tracy, I'm your case worker.
What is this?

- How disappointing.
- Come with me, please.

No, thank you, thank you.
Fairy questionnaires.

What are you wearing?

I don't know what I'm wearing.
What are you wearing?

- Who is this guy?
- Dream Killer. I don't like your assault.

What did I do? Why am I here?
Where am I?

No one likes your kind, right here.

No one likes your attitude, the
way you always show up here acting

all strange, "Oh, why am I here?,
What are these giant wings man?"

Do we have a problem?

Yeah, we have a problem. Do we have a
problem, he said. We have a problem. Yeah,

we have a problem because you just said do
we have a problem which gives us a problem.

- That's right.
- Tracy, right?

Ah, what a pretty girl's
name you have.

Don't laugh at him.
That's not funny.

That's strike two and you
don't wanna get to strike three.

- What happens after strike three?
- Strike four.

We'll get your uniform sort out in a minute

and then we can get you registered
and begin your training.

- Training for what?
- Oooh, training for what?

You, Mr. Thompson, are gonna
spend some time as a Tooth Fairy.

Calm down, everyone.
Just let him to be harmless.

- Everyone alright?
- Oh really, is that what, your fairy patrol?

I'm 230 pounds, gonna take a lot
more than just eight fairies to get me.

Fairy, hands off!
Is this fairy etiquette?

Where were we?

Help please! Wake me up! I'm in a
nightmare, please! Please, help me!

The nightmare is just beginning.

You want a shot at the title.
Is that it? You're feeling lucky?

Maybe I am. Hold this, baby.
I can see nothing, give it back.

You want a piece of this?
I'm ready to go.

- You just made a big mistake.
- He's got a magic wand.

What's next? You gonna
pull a rabbit out of the hat.

Fairy fight!

Oh, now I got one too. Let me
introduce you to the Hammer Brothers.

Sladge and Jack, who do you want?

Who do you wanna meet?

Oh dear, looks like you
pick on the wrong fairy.

Oh, magic wand.
Oh my gosh, the magic wand.

What is going on here?

Stop it! You're behaving
like leprechauns.

He's got such a major attitude problem.

Oh, I'm well aware of his attitude.
Believe me.

- Hello, Mr. Thompson.
- Hi.

Sorry about the follow up
with your outfit.

Budget problems. Tracy
will take care of it.

Who him? Yeah, sure.

You, sir, are guilty of
disseminating disbelief,

killing dreams, committing
first degree murder of fantasy

which by Fairy Law....

Wait a minute. Is this because
of what happened with Tess...

Excuse me.

I haven't finished speaking.

Did I look as though I
had finished speaking?

I don't know. Everybody's got
a British accent around.

You've just interrupted me again

while I was admonishing
you for interrupting me.

Do I not look official enough?

I don't understand why policemen
or firemen don't get interrupted.

But you had a pair of wings and
suddenly all manners go out the window.

Shouldn't you be more in awe
of somebody with wings than without?

You have no idea
what I'm capable of.

I could just fly up into the air
and do something crazy.

Maybe I breath fire.
You don't know.

I'm sorry for interrupting you.
I didn't mean it.

That is better.

In order to pay your
debt to humanity,

you are hereby ordered to
serve time as a tooth fairy.

Normal sentence is one week but

because you have the
nerve, the unmitigated gall,

to actually call yourself
the "Tooth Fairy"

thus make a mockery of
everything we stand for.

I'm sentencing you to two
weeks Tooth Fairy duty.

- Ah, no, no, no. No, it's unfair.
- Interrupting.

Interrupting again.
Unbelievable.

Take him away and see
that he's properly outfitted

and get him into
flying school.

- I'm sorry, what?
- Oh but first, you get to meet Jerry.

Excuse me, Fairy Godmother.
I have one last question.

Does this tutu make
my butt a little big?

Yes...huge.

- Egg on the face.
- No, don't, no.

Oh good, you got the male version.

Get to a little spin so I can see.

How about I give you a little
spin of my fist around your nose?

Okay, what does that mean?

- It's a threat. That's what it means.
- You just said, you're gonna do that.

- No, I'll punch you right in the nose.
- Just say that, it's much clearer.

- What's that? Oooh...
- It's just pathetic. It's like a child.

Chicken is fine. I
don't hate you, chicken.

I like you, chicken.
I hate your brisket.

Yeah, I'm coming.
Goodbye.

Never marry a leprechaun.

Oh, the dream popper.

Hey, did it make you feel
good to lie on that kid?

I didn't lie to a kid.

You told her there was
no tooth fairy, right?

- Right.
- Liar.

Look, I'm sorry. I...

Sorry is a beginning. Now,
if you're gonna be a fairy

you gotta be ready although...

Dude, there is a pill.
I mean, amazing pill.

If you take this pill, you
don't have to do any of these.

- Really?
- No, I was just kidding.

See, you're mad at me.
You believe and then I took it away.

Be mad at me. I don't care.
I have tenure.

Come on, walk with Jerry.

Okay, here's your tool pouch.
Waterproof, lot of compartments.

- You can get a lot of stuff in there. You dig?
- Yeah.

Okay.
This...

This is your wand. Tooth detector,
radar jamming, keeps picking up radio caliente.

- I don't know what that's about.
- Okay, what's that?

Magic generator button. Does what
you ever wanted to do

but you
have to believe otherwise it won't work.

So it's pretty much useless to humans.

Ah this, you don't ever wanna lose this.

- What is it?
- Well, it looks like an IPod adapter.

- Right, so what is it?
- It's an IPod adapter.

- What's it for?
- Listening to your IPod.

You get it for your IPod.
Did you not ask for your free IPod?

- No, really?
- I'm just kidding.

You know, why do you keep doing that?

I'm not well. I actually just
have a few months to live.

Oh, you're kidding.

Of course, I'm kidding. Why
would I share that with you?

I just met you plus
you lied to the kids.

Come on, we got business to do.

Invisibility spray. You use it, nobody
can see you except for other fairies.

And this, Dude, trust me.

Shrinking paste.

You put a little on your tongue,

you shrink down to about six
inches tall. You wanna do it?

Come on, let's do it together.

Come on, let's do it. Come on,
we'll jump into each other's hands.

Well, I don't wanna jump
in your hands, Jerry.

Really, come on, let's get small.

Sometimes when I'm home with the
wife, right. I'll take a double hit,

I'll get down to about that big and
let my feet dangle in the inkwell.

Then, when she's out.
I walk all over her body.

So when she wakes up,
there's these little footprints all over and she goes...

and I go, "Hey, I don't know."

See when you're married a long
time, you'll do stuff like this.

Alright, let's see. What else?
Oh, would you like a mint.

I made them myself. Here. Have a mint.
Taste it. Come on. Really good.

Go ahead. Come on.
Taste it. Help yourself.

These are good.

Well, these are good.

- Dog bark mints. Comes in very handy.
- For what?

Cats, mailmen, dogs
that comes up behind

you forget my drift or another kid
that you lied to comes after you.

How many times I gotta
to say I'm sorry about that?

Six times.

I'm sorry, I was just kidding.
I can't believe you did this.

Did you play for years
without a helmet or something?

What is with you? It's like your brain
is in the penalty box. I'm telling you...

and you got like the eyes of
a shark but like deader.

Alright, listen.

Cat away. Very important.

If you're not a cat person, this
thing will come in very handy.

I almost have a senior fairy
moment. Don't you move.

This is my greatest invention ever.

Amnesia dust.

You throw a pinch, the
kid forgets everything

that happened for the last few seconds.

- Yeah, right. Come on.
- That's how it works.

That's how what works?

Amnesia dust. You throw a pinch,
the kid forgets everything

that happened for the last few seconds.

- That's how it works.
- That's how what works?

Amnesia dust, you throw a pinch
the kids forgets everything

that happened for the last few seconds.

- That's how it works.
- That's how what works?

Never gets old.

You wanna fly, you gotta believe.
But you gotta learn to use your wings.

Use my wings. You know how
ridiculous you sound right now.

Oh, who's your hobbit
friend over here?

Wait, you stay here, okay.
You have to learn from the best.

And some dang fool accused
this guy of being the best.

Well me and flying is just
not gonna happen, okay.

I've got an old hockey injury so
I probably got a bad wing.

That's one I've never heard before.

- How's it going, Duke?
- What's up, man?

- Want me to turn a He-Man into Peter Pan.
- Oh, don't get me started, homey.

Oh, what is that? Your little
secret fairy jiving now.

Maybe you didn't hear me,
I said I got a bad wing, I can't fly!

- Is this okay?
- Yeah.

- I'm tracking this baby up.
- Put me down.

- I think you're ready to practice FOA.
- FOA? What's FOA?

Flying Object Avoidance.

I'll throw something at you,
you get out of the way, okay.

Oh, you better not
throw anything at me.

- You wanna get on him, Tracy?
- Put me down!

Imagine they're your responsibilities.
You're avoiding them.

- Bring it on.
- We will do!

Raise your right hand,
repeat after me: I, fill in your name

I, Derek Thompson...

Swear to uphold and perform...

Swear to uphold and perform...

The duties, responsibilities
and obligations...

The duties, responsibilities
and obligations...

of a Tooth Fairy.

of a Tooth Fairy.

of a Tooth Fairy.

And that I will not drink and fly.

Drink and fly?

Okay, now, it's serious.
That's serious.

That I will not drink and fly.

Welcome aboard.

These coupons are all
redeemable at the gift shop.

Oh, maybe I can have
a fairy bumper sticker.

Alright, I can see. That
it's real. Fairies do exist.

It's too late. Your
sentence begins tomorrow.

No, no, no...There's gotta be a way
to postpone this like jury duty.

I'm sure up here you have fairy duty
or whatever it is you have up here.

I got the coaches breathing down my neck

and I've got to patch things
up with my girlfriend.

The interrupting thing.
I'm sorry.

Any assignment you miss,
you get another week.

And if you fail your terms of service
or tell anyone you're a tooth fairy,

your time will be extended indefinitely.

- Oh really? I'm not leaving.
- Goodbye, Mr. Thompson.

No.

I'm sorry.

For what?

- What I said last night?
- Which part?

All of the parts that
deeply offended you.

Okay, everything I've ever said.

Or thought. Even before I met you.

- Wanna come in?
- Oh yeah.

You can spend that
one on one time with Randy.

Yeah.

You know what,
let me go to my car

and get something
and I'll be right back.

Me and Randy.
Alright, yeah.

- I don't know you could shred like that.
- What do you want?

Well, I bought you a present.
Can you guess what it is?

Is it a puppy?

Why it's a guy and a puppy?
It's one of my hockey sticks.

And now after I signed your pal...

The "Tooth Fairy"

Now, it's worth lot
of money. There you go.

Okay, I'm just gonna
leave it right here.

I bet you get a lot of chicks
with that guitar, don't you?

Can we stop this now?

- Stop what?
- You're just like my mom's last boyfriends.

Just pretending to be
nice to me to impress her.

You're wrong. I'm much better
looking than your mom's past boyfriends.

Big boy pound for
trying to break the ice.

- No, it's going away.
- Look, I have to get back to practice.

Okay, how about you
come over to my place.

I could break out my old drum
kit, you can bring your guitar

and we could have a
jam session together.

Or how about I just go and tell
my mom you're actually pretty cool.

- and you stop trying to bond with me.
- I'll take that deal.

You'll never believe what Randy
said about you after you left.

He said that you're
actually pretty cool.

- Well, I am pretty cool.
- We'll see.

But whatever you're doing is
working so why don't you keep it up.

- Hmmm, who's T?
- I have no idea. I don't know.

What I do know is I would love
for you to close your eyes

coz I have an amazing surprise.

- Really. Okay.
- Yeah. Alright.

- Close your eyes.
- Okay.

I'll be right back.

Is my surprise 6 foot 3
with dark brown eyes.

- Oh, you'll find out shortly.
- I love surprises!

Get ready!

- I know you're right in front of me.
- You should keep your eyes closed.

Okay.

- Everything's okay. Don't peek.
- Okay.

- I need some air.
- What?

- I'm not feeling well.
- Oh, should I come over.

- No, no. Give me some toilet paper.
- Of course, where is it?

It's upstairs in the bathroom.
It's way upstairs.

Oh my gosh!

- Hello.
- Hello.

- Who's this?
- It's me. It's Tracy.

- Tracy who?
- Tracy, your case worker.

Listen, your first assignment
is just falling asleep

so get yourself over quick.

- To 663 Shelter Cove.
- I thought that was a dream.

- Well, think again.
- Derek.

- Oh no, no.
- Where are you?

Bushes. Please don't come any
closer you can't see me like this.

It will ruin your
romantic image of me.

Oh, honey.
You are so sick.

I checked the entire bathroom
I couldn't find anything.

You gotta look underneath the sink.
Underneath the sink.

Way back deep underneath the sink.

Okay.

You heard the rules.
You can't miss an assignment.

Plus those wings will stay on
your back until you get that tooth.

- Oh, man.
- You could clean up a little.

My wing.

- Delicately done. Well done.
- I can't believe this is happening.

Well, it is happening so can you get
in the house please and fetch the tooth.

No, no, no...I'm not going anywhere.
Why don't you go in?

- Oh, because it's not my job.
- That doesn't make any sense.

You're a fairy so why don't
you just go in and get the tooth?

Because I'm not a
winged fairy, alright.

I'm a case worker fairy which actually
bears a lot more responsibility.

You know, those little filing and
putting stuff along. It's tricky.

Ah, so what you're saying
is you're not good enough.

I'm not saying that.

- And they stuck you behind the desk.
- Now, I tell you what...

They did, alright, there's a lot of
wing discrimination in the workplace.

Very funny. Okay, tell me how are you
gonna enter the house and get the tooth?

- Maybe I'll wing it.
- Brilliant. How are you gonna get in the house?

- On a wing and a prayer.
- This is very very funny stuff.

But how are you gonna get the tooth?

Which wing of the house
should I start with first?

Do you want another week?

No, no, no. I don't want
another minute of this.

So what do you suggest, Einstein?
I can't fly so do what?

How about you shrink yourself
down and slide under the front door?

Of course, just shrink
and slide in.

Yeah, that's what anybody
would do in this situation.

- Is this gonna hurt?
- Let's hope so.

- Come on.
- And how do I get big again?

Oh, it's automatic. From
the moment you shrink

you start to gradually regrow.
It only takes about an hour.

Come on.

- I can't believe this.
- Eat it.

Shut up.

Do you like it?

Yum, yum, Derek Thompson.

Nice.

Oh, not so brave now,
little wee man.

No, no, no, no, no...

Wing jokes aren't so funny now,
are they? The shoes on the other foot.

- Okay, okay
- Now, you should shoe me some respect.

I'll shoe you some respect when I get

bigger, I'm gonna get up there
put that shoes on your face.

- You shouldn't upset me.
- Is that the best you got?

- Just take the money.
- Hey, watch it. Don't throw money.

Money's heavy.
Money is heavy.

I hate this. I can't believe...
Oh my wing, my wing.

I'm the tooth fairy.
I'm the tooth fairy.

- Honey, what's the matter?
- I saw something.

- What did you see?
- It was a little tiny man.

Nice kitty. Don't hurt me, kitty.

I'm a tooth fairy.
Disappear. Kitty be gone.

- Derek.
- Carly.

- Come cuddle with me.
- No.

- What?
- Going to bed. Still not well.

I'll call you when I'm bigger
I mean better.

Hello hockey fans. I'm Steve Libby
coming to you from Wolf Den

here in Lansing, Michigan.
Home of the Lansing Ice Wolves.

We're about to see the potentially
historic debut of an 18-year old phenom

Mick Donnelly who is just about set
to take the ice for the first time.

- So kid, you pumped up for your first game?
- Yeah, pops. I'm super pumped.

It just means one last game
till I'm out of here and into the bigs.

You know what, I'm done being generous.

This is my kingdom, you're in my kingdom
now. I'm the king. You're not even a prince.

You know what you are, you're
like one of those little guys in tights

running around the court in a peepy wig.

Looks like you've been dethroned.

This is it. Final minute, regulation time.
The Ice Wolves lead the Roughnecks 2-1.

And the kid Donnelly has more than lived up to
the height. He's still working on that hattrick.

Off the face off, the puck
comes back to the Roughnecks.

There's a quick shot. Nice save.

The puck goes into the corner
and Donnelly picks it up.

Oh, now he puts on the brake
and spins out of trouble.

Whoa, look at him flying, Jim.

He beats another defender.
And here he comes.

Donnelly is pressing up the ice.

What a move!

He's going to the Roughnecks
like they're a bunch of blinded mules.

Donnelly surfing around the Roughneck goal.
He looks upfront to pass.

Now, he kicks off the board.

Now, Donnelly cruise himself off the
board and takes a pass from center.

He looks to shoot.

No, not now.

What a move! Crashing open ice
hit to Donnelly and he's down.

Like Thompson was gonna clear
Lamberg out of the zone and suddenly,

instead he just dropped
to the ice, no one even touched him.

Hey, Thompson, you cost me a
hattrick and an interview on ESPN.

Hey, get over here.
I wanna talk to you.

What are you doing?
Let's get out of here.

No, no, not...I'm very busy right now.
No autographs, I'm busy.

Fine, I'll wait.

What are you guys talking about?

- What's he wearing?
- Check out his feet.

Disappear.

No, no, no. Either you
come out or we're coming in.

- One...
- Stop it.

Two...

Three!

What happened? Why are you late?
Where have you been?

- Don't talk to me.
- Why are you wet?

- Shut up and I hate this job.
- What's that smell?

That's intense. I can't breathe.
That's too much.

- Hello.
- Hi.

- What the...
- Mom, I'm home.

Where's the kid?

- Be nice, be respectful and nice.
- I just came out of a toilet. You think I care?

Ah, Mama Fairy, there is your
tooth. So you do it with it, whatever

it is you do here in Fairy
World with your teeth.

Mr. Thompson, according to your case worker,
you're exactly embracing the Tooth Fairy spirit.

Really, is that what my case worker said?
So you called her and told her that.

Well, let me tell you something.
My case worker here has wing envy.

- Not true.
- It is true!

I am a giant fan of the job I do.
And all the administrating...

- You hate this job.
- I love it. I look forward to it.

No you don't.
You hate this.

Will you two stop it?

Just look at what you
have done to this family.

- Who are you?
- Who are you?

I don't know.

Am I home yet?

It's not funny.

Did you see the dog?
His eyes were like that.

You overdid it.

Fairy Godmother, who is your
supervisor? Who is above you?

Gandhi? Who do I talk to?

Because I wanna file
a complaint right now.

- You have another assignment.
- Another tooth. Are you kidding me?

Sometimes, there's a double-header.

Come on, just tell me where the tooth
is so I could get it and just go home.

Oh no, not until the child falls asleep.
Till then, I'm afraid you have to wait.

One kid's falling asleep in the afternoon,
another kid's up all night.

- Cup of tea.
- Good tea?

Refreshing.

Hi-ya, you feeling any better?

Yeah, a little bit. How
about you guys come on up?

- Hi Derek!
- Hi gorgeous!

Actually I have a
really big favor to ask.

Tess and I just got a last
minute invitation to...

- To beauty makeover party!
- Nice.

A beauty makeover party and I
was wondering because you're not

getting along so well now if Randy could
hang out with you for a little while.

(Please)

Yeah, yes, of course.

Super. Great. Thank you.
I'll make it up to you.

- Be good. Have fun.
- Bye.

Awesome.

I can see hockey's
been really good to you.

You wanna hang with me or
do you wanna go get a beauty makeover.

- Pretty cool stuff in here, huh.
- Yeah. Whatever.

Why don't you take one
down? See how it sounds.

I don't wanna.

Here. Give it a shot.

- Please don't, no.
- No, give it a shot.

Let's see how it sounds.
Go ahead.

That sounds great.
I'm gonna go check out

the drums and the sticks
and in the meantime

you just keep practicing coz
all that is just awesome.

- Hi, Randy.
- Hey, what's up?

- You sound pretty good.
- Thanks.

- Are you gonna play in the Talent Show?
- Kelly, there you are.

- Why are you talking to Emo boy?
- Don't be a jerk, Ben.

- Your dad's waiting. We have to go.
- Bye, Randy.

Bye.

Don't even think about talking
to her. You got it, loser?

Okay.

You should put this away
coz you stink.

- What are you doing with Randy's guitar?
- I don't know.

- You should give it back to him.
- Okay.

Now you could get out of here.
Beat it.

- Oh, you are in trouble now.
- We'll see.

Oh, I know, we'll see.
Can you beat two pair?

Call me and find it out.

Oh, big boy put $10 on this big
boy totals. Look at that, me too,

I'm not scared coz it's aces over kings.

- Flush.
- No.

- Yes.
- Nice.

Can I ask you something?

It's about your body and how
it's changing, isn't it?

What?

You know, everything that's happening to you
and your body now is completely natural.

Stop talking! Stop talking!
Eeew! No! Stop talking!

- Okay, okay. Well, you...
- That wasn't what I was gonna ask you at all.

- Okay, okay. Alright.
- That wasn't even close.

Big boy pound for not wanting
to talk about puberty.

Thank goodness. Believe me.
I don't want to talk about it either.

Alright, so what's up seriously?

Alright, well. There's this Talent
Show coming up at my school and...

Okay.

My mom thinks I should play in it
and I'm kind of...I don't know.

- Well, maybe you should play in it.
- Yeah?

Yeah, yeah. You'll be great.
I heard you play. You're really good, man.

And the chicks they
love guitar players.

- We're back!
- Hey, baby. We're up here.

Don't tell your mom
I said that about girls.

- Hi boys!
- Hi!

- How did it go?
- Well, I lose some chips.

- Does not!
- He absolutely does and you look...

- Gorgeous!
- You took the words right out of my mouth.

You guys hungry?
How about we go get some supper?

Love to.

Where did you go, then?

Oh no.
You guys got to go.

Is someone hurt?

No, not hurt the way
that you have to be worried.

And both of you look beautiful
and I will call you later. I'm so sorry.

- Okay.
- Bye.

- Shrinking paste.
- Nope. Not that again.

- Amnesia dust.
- No.

- Flying.
- Bad wing. Forget it.

Hey, and by the way, your all-purpose
magic generator button, it doesn't work.

It's broken.

- Here's an idea, brain box. Why don't you...
- Don't touch my pouch. It's my pouch.

- That was too much.
- What do you want?

I'm just saying, you got the
magical invisibility spray.

Okay, that's relatively
the approved.

Yeah, I know that.

Ignore my last comment.

Hey, what a surprise. It doesn't work.
Your stuff stinks.

- Nice.
- Till it wears off.

- Did you hear that?
- Yes.

Go.

Are you lost?
Can we help you?

How would you like
a little amnesia dust?

- Where am I?
- Just go to the white light, my friend.

Nice doggie.

No, not me, doggie.

What is this?

- It's a long and delightful story.
- Where's the tooth?

Can I get a little help here?

That would be all.

You might just be the
worst tooth fairy ever.

- Oh, by the way, I need some more stuff.
- Stuff?

Stuff. The magic powder, the gank,
the stuff. I need some, notify Q.

No, no more stuff.

Well, that's brilliant. I have a week and a
half left on my job. How am I suppose to do that?

I'm sorry, we're running very low on
funding. And would you like to know why?

- No, not really.
- Because children aren't believing as they used to.

It's not just us. It's unicorns, leprechauns,
dragons, all those departments. Completely gone.

If this trend continues, Tooth
Fairly Land would cease to exist.

No child will ever again receive
a visit from a Tooth Fairy. Ever.

No more visit from the Tooth Fairy.
So what?

You really don't get it, do you?

You don't see the children fantasies,
their abilities to imagine are important.

Why? It nourishes their very souls.

It's the foundation that
allows them to dream.

Dreams are bad.
They're bad. They're useless.

- You're done.
- For the week?

No, for the night. Unless, you
wish to stay for Fairy-oke.

Oh my....No.

I got what you need.

- What's that?
- Goods, stuff, package, bag, bomb, the juice.

The Bing, the Bang, Frisco special,
pink lady, little drummer boy.

Who are you?

Ziggy. But you can call
me whatever you want.

You can call me Zigman, Zigmaister.

- Please stop talking.
- You know, they want you to fail.

- What?
- Think about it. You fail. They talk on more time.

It's like credit card debt, man.
They just wanna keep you paying forever.

- Yeah?
- You really wanna play that game.

- So...
- A thousand bucks.

- A thousand bucks. You're killing me, Ziggy.
- How bad do you want this to end?

Can I write you a check?

Oh, my goodness!

You can see me?

Oh, man.
This better work.

Oh no, what is that?

What are you doing?

What did Ziggy give me?

- Just stay calm.
- 911. 911.

- Fine, I just need the tooth.
- There's an alien on my porch.

You are amazing.
Lily is so tagged off

because she has to send another
fairy to clean up your mess.

I'd learned my lesson.
Never buy black market stuff.

I can't go through another
two weeks without it.

Yes, you can, friend.

You just have to surrender to a higher
power and take it one day at a time.

Hello. Case workers decide
who can see us and who can't.

Which is something you'd know

if you ever paid me any attention,
ever listened to everything I say.

But no.
You always...

Shut up!

Hey, my friend, you really
need to get yourself cleaned up.

If you want I can give you a pamphlet.

Oh and FYI, your sentence
is being extended.

Lily just tagged on
another week so well done.

- Great. Just what I need.
- I think it is what you need, friend.

Listen, I can give you fresh
supplies right now on one condition.

From now on, you follow the rules.

You embrace the fairy spirit and
you start listening to old muggins here.

Fine. I'll be the best Tooth Fairy ever.

You keep running out on me
to see I don't even know who

and then you never call and
when I do finally hear from you

it's to bail you out of jail.

What's going on with you?

I wanna tell you
but I can't.

Why not?

I just can't.

I know what this is. This
is you acting up because

you are afraid of making a commitment.

You're nervous by us
getting serious, aren't you?

Yes, that's it. You know me so well.

I'm nervous about how
serious we're getting.

What?

You're a woman and frankly
you wouldn't understand.

What?

No.

No, I'm not nervous
about us getting serious.

As a matter of fact, I wouldn't even
think about getting serious with you.

What?

I'm afraid and Carly I love you so much.

I'm scared of messing up
and I'm scared of losing you.

I understand.

So glad you could share that with me.

Where can I get some of that?

What are you doing?
Are you oiling up your abs again?

- I'm coming.
- Hurry up!

Hey, I've been stepped on,
flushed, bitten and arrested.

Will you stop complaining? You
promised to embrace the fairy spirit.

Oh, I'm embracing the
fairy spirit, alright.

But I'm doing it...

My way.

- I'm not sure that's in the rules.
- Oh yeah.

I'm just here for the tooth, sir.
Just the tooth.

I'm gonna take my glove away.

That's it.

Now, just hand over the tooth.
Nice and easy.

Let it go. Let it go.
I said let it go.

Very good.
You have a good night, sir.

- Who are you?
- I'm the Tooth Fairy.

Oh yeah.

You got it?
Alright, let's go.

Alright, Mick, how's life is
Lansing so far for you?

It's been good. You know,
I'm the new blood of the team and...

you know, some of
these wolves are getting

a little bit longer than
tooth if you know what I mean.

When you say longer than
tooth that would seem to be

a veiled reference to Derek
Thompson "The Tooth Fairy"

It's not a rivalry, you know.
I respect my elders.

Is Thompson taking
you under his wing?

No, man. His wings are
tattered. My wings are brand new.

I'm ready to fly and you know,
I like to do my own thing.

Alright, a confident young hockey player.
Good luck this afternoon.

Thank you very much.

Now, the Ice Wolves dumped the puck

in the New Haven zone and
we can make a line change.

Mick, get ready!

- Finally.
- Hey, good luck out there, buddy.

Okay.

No, I mean it. I think
you're gonna do great

coz you're the bestest
hockey player ever.

Whatever.

Mick, change, change!
Hit them. Hit them.

- Yeah.
- Come on, sport.

Donnelly jumps into the play
and takes a cross slice pass.

The Ice Wolves trying
to cross the boom line.

They're scrambled in
front of the net now.

These two rivals starting to get
a little feisty with each other.

Oh yeah.

Alright, here we go!
Here we go! Here we go!

Puck goes in the corner but
Mottley chases it down.

- What's up with Donnelly, Jim?
- Donnelly, get in there.

The puck squirts loose around the board.

Now Donnelly picks it up and speeds
to the point looking to set up a play.

Beat them, beat them,
beat them!

Hi!

He takes a hell of a fall!

What happened there, Jim?

- Who hit him?
- Did someone hit him, Jim?

What is going on?

- What's he doing?
- Stop it.

Is he laughing?

Donnelly, are you okay, kid?

What?

- Are you trying to test me, kid?
- Get off the ice!

If you don't wanna play games you
can head over to Health Care Center.

Get out of here, right now. Move it.

So, what did I miss?

Why do you bark?

I'm not gonna be ready. I
might get up there and blow it.

No, you'll be fine. We just
got to keep practicing, come on.

Everyone's gonna laugh at me.
Maybe I shouldn't do this.

Maybe they will or maybe you'll
blow the roof off the place, huh.

Man, you're good but you'll
not gonna find out if you quit.

You can't score if
you don't take the shot.

Yeah, when was the
last time you took a shot?

Listen, when I first
started I was a scorer.

First round draft pick of the
Devils. Playing in the bigs.

So what happened?

I busted my shoulder
one night in Chicago.

They sent me down to the minors
to recover and it took forever.

I got so angry and
frustrated, one night in a game

I got into some meat head from New Haven.
I knocked out a couple of his teeth,

the crowd went crazy and they
started calling me "The Tooth Fairy"

And it's stuck.

And I haven't scored in years.

But I got more penalty minutes
than anyone else in the league.

Like isn't your
shoulder all healed now?

Yeah, it's just not the same.

But how do you know? You don't even try.

You can't score if you
don't take the shot.

I tell you what...
I will if you will.

Okay. I'll take that deal.

I have another tooth.

That must be good.
That moment.

When you hand over the tooth.

No, I'm not interested.
Just wondering, you know.

How it felt?

Why don't you find out yourself?

We've been through this,
I'm not a winged fairy.

Okay, okay, explain to me one
more time. Why can't you have wings?

Sorry, do you know nothing
about fairy evolution?

Fairy evolution. Who wrote that?
Charles Darwing?

Inspired, really.
According to fairy evolution

some fairies can grow
wings and some can't.

And you know, I'm
one of the unlucky ones.

Tracy, you don't have to
have wings to be a tooth fairy.

- Remember you got all of these.
- That is true.

Somehow, you gotta show them
your strengths, speed, agility, flexibility.

And how am I gonna do that?

Around the cones! Around the
cones! Around the cones!

Quick feet!
Quick feet!

No, come back!
Come back!

- Where are you doing?
- Look at this...

It's three feet high. You're
eight feet tall. Come back.

- Oh, dinosaur!
- No, it's not!

What the heck!

Come on.
Rollercoaster.

- Come on.
- I'm okay, I'm okay.

- Are you okay?
- No.

Bathroom robe is
my worst nightmare.

- I got it. I got it.
- I'm bad.

You look like a beautiful
reindeer with your legs.

You can plant seeds. You're planting.

Not on the kid. On yourself.
Amnesia dust. Amnesia dust.

You sound great.
You're gonna kill them tomorrow night.

So, what do you think?

Nice. That is big time.
Randy Harris. Talent Show.

I like that slot too.

You really think I can
be a famous rock star?

Like Clapton or Hendrix
or Steve Ray Vaughn.

- You wanna straight.
- Yeah.

Okay.

You're getting pretty good, right.

So let's say you keep
working at it really hard.

Then, let's say you
become the best 13-year old

guitarist in your neighborhood.

Here's the deal: You gotta remember
that are a lot of neighborhoods out there

with a lot of 13-year old
guitarist but somewhere out there,

there's a 12-year old who's shredding,
I mean he's killing that guitar.

You know what.
Yeah, it's possible.

Cool.

Go get them.

Late in the 3rd period, the Ice Wolves
are down 4-3 to the Arrows

Donnelly's getting a breather
but having another great game.

The Arrows leading scorer Pragwood
takes the pass and he is on the move.

Mick, your line's up.

Hey old man, got a fresh
pair of defense on?

Ah, you'll never know,
kid. This might surprise you.

The Ice Wolves dumped the puck into
the Arrows zone and change lines on a fly.

That's suppose to put
Donnelly back in the game.

Out there, he's got the puck in roll
so they're crossing the blue line.

Change!
Change!

And here's comes Thompson on
the bed replacing Josh.

Thompson knocks Crossling
flat on his back

and kicks the puck to neutral
zone where Browning picks it up.

Thompson jumps back into play
and Donnelly weeds around Crossling.

Now, Thompson takes the pass
right on his stick as Donnelly flies in the play.

It's a 2 on 1 with Thompson of
all people leading the way.

Pass it!

You can see Donnelly screaming for
the puck but Thompson won't give it up.

Thompson looks to pass.
No, he beats the pass.

He's got the top shelf wide open.

- Pass it!
- Pass!

No.

What is he thinking?

The Arrows have numbers
they're coming up the ice.

They shoot. They score.

Jim, it looked like Thompson was
actually gonna shoot and he just choked.

You're not a hockey player,
you're a sideshow attraction!

You know what, why don't you watch
tomorrow's game from the bench, you bum.

Great!

- Hey honey, how was your game?
- Not good.

- Derek, guess what? I
have another loose tooth.

Good for you, honey.

- What's the matter, hon?
- Everything. Nothing, you know. Forget it.

Can we go practice now?

You know what, can we skip today's
session. I just don't have it in me.

- But the Talent Show's tomorrow night.
- You'll be fine.

- I need at least one more run through it.
- No, you don't, okay.

No, I do need it. I just
need a little more practice.

Just so I can get down.

It doesn't matter what
you do in the Talent Show.

You're never gonna be a famous rock
star. You're just gonna be another

kid with a guitar. So do yourself
a favor and just give it up, okay.

Derek!

Look, baby. I'm sorry but
it's for his own good. Trust me.

Come on, Tess!

- What is wrong with you?
- I had a bad day.

- You had a bad day?
- Yeah, I had a bad day, okay.

No, no. That is not okay.

You are never gonna speak
to my children again.

- We are done.
- Carly.

You know what your problem is,
Derek? You can't say what if.

And you never will.

Okay. Okay.

Okay, okay, okay.
Alright.

Who wants to hear some good news?
I do. Come on.

- Why are you here?
- Lily gave me this.

Obviously, it's just a permit but
the main thing is I'm on the way.

Okay well, you should be
on your way out of my place.

I'm going to bed.

No, this is all thanks to you.
We got to go out and celebrate.

I know a place where all the hot
fairy godmothers hang out.

Are you out of your mind?

I just lost everything that's important
to me. My girlfriend, those kids.

And I'll probably just
hang out my skates for good.

All because like an idiot I bought
into your tooth fairy garbage.

And look where it's gotten me.

What? You make one effort
after all these years

and it doesn't work out and
suddenly you're just gonna give up?

It's not suppose to be that easy.
And you know it.

I'll tell you what I do know. I
know that you don't have wings.

So that means you can't fly.

That also means that you can never
ever ever be a tooth fairy.

And what happens if you try to
escape out of a 10-storey building?

I'll tell you what happens.

Splat! Just like that.

You know what's really sad?

The person you hurt the most
with all your dream killing is not

Randy or Carly or even me.

- It's you.
- Get out.

- Fine.
- Good.

Fine.
I'm going to bed.

1:24 left in the 3rd period but the
Ice Wolves still trailing 1 to nothing.

And Derek Thompson is still
completely in the coach's doghouse.

I don't think he's seeing a second
of ice time the whole game here.

Here we go.
Here we go.

As he has all game on transport
tranquil the mute grove

continues to replace
Thompson on the first line.

Face off won by the Glover Myth.

Oh, what a hit!

Donnelly seals the puck. Now he's
rushing up the ice sure-handed.

Only Claudey can get back.

Let's go, Mick.
Let's go, Mick.

This is classic, Jim. Every move
Donnelly makes comes unanswered.

Donnelly moves to his left. Oh,
he's got blood out of detention

and Donnelly moves around him.
He's got the defense of Mcphee, he shoots.

Oh, it's a crossbar.

Hey, what happened?
He blew the whistle.

That behind the play, Jim.
Petranco got sucker punched

and I don't think he's getting up.

Thompson. Go.
Go!

Alright, here we go, boys!

The Ice Wolves have less
than a minute to score, Jim

and send this game in overtime.

Off the face off, it's
Classford with the puck

and he start there driving
as the clock winds down.

I don't know, Jim. It looks to me like Thompson
is just going through the motions out there.

Thompson just got leathered!
How could that not be a penalty?

He just got tossed.

I think the Tooth Fairy just got
a taste of his own medicine.

Look at Thompson, Jim.

It looks like he's got some
jump back in those legs.

Thompson's rushing across the ice
and I don't think it's to make friends.

Well, this is gonna hurt.

No, he pulled off, Jim. He didn't
throw a check. Incredible!

He steals the puck and now is
barreling down the ice.

- Look at him go!
- They just can't keep up with Thompson.

He's making moves we
haven't seen in a long time.

What is that guy?

Thompson now has only
one defender to beat.

- He takes the stick on the face.
- I don't think he's going down.

No, he stays on his feet.
He's gonna shoot!

He shoots!

He scores!

Derek Thompson has not take a shot
in nine years and one of the most

amazing shots I've ever seen
and ties it up at one-all.

Call me the mayor of Southville.

Let's do it again.

Hey old man.
Not bad.

Nice shot, dude!

And here we go. We're under
20 seconds as both teams

head to the center line for a face off.

Oh no.

The Ice Wolves win the draw.

Here's a cross slice pass
to Thompson who ices it.

- Why would he do that, Ed?
- I have no idea, Jim.

No, I can't leave now.

This is my last chance
to actually play the game.

To go out the way I came in.

Well, I could cover for you.
After what I've seen, you deserve it.

Thompson, what are you doing?

- Who's he talking to?
- Yeah, but aren't you just a trainee.

- Isn't that breaking the rules?
- Please, I've learned from the best.

But I do think, you should
look at the address

before you decide.

It's Carly's house.

- Hey 14, come on, let's go.
- Thompson! Get back in the game.

- I can go. Lily does not have to know.
- But I'll know.

This is my house to take care of.

- Let's do this.
- How? You can't fly.

- Good time to learn.
- I knew you had it in you.

Go get them.

You wanna fly you gotta believe.

No need to panic. It's
just a giant amnesia gun.

It's painless. You
won't remember a thing.

Don't you forget about me...
You will.

Good luck finding your cars.

- Tess.
- Derek.

- Hi, honey.
- Hi, Derek.

- I like your costume.
- I have to tell you something.

I was wrong. The tooth fairy.
It's real and it's me.

I know.

No, honey, I'm not talking
about the hockey tooth fairy.

I'm a real tooth fairy.

No, you're not.

- You are the real tooth fairy.
- It will just be our secret, okay.

Okay.

Randy.

What are you doing here?

- I have to talk to you.
- Go away.

Listen. Those things I said
yesterday, I was wrong.

I don't care.

You gotta keep playing
guitar. You're really good.

And nothing you love doing that
much could ever be a waste of time.

I'm so sorry.

Even if I wanted to, I can't.
I smashed my guitar, remember?

Tonight is the Talent Show.

Hold on a second.

- Maybe this will help.
- Whoa, it's awesome.

- How did you do that?
- All-purpose magic generator.

- What are you wearing?
- You'll find out.

In the meantime,
put some clothes on.

We can still make
the Talent Show, okay.

Come on.

Derek.

Mommy! Derek is the tooth fairy.

You rented a fairy costume
to make it up to Tess.

Yes, that's what I did.

Hey mom, Derek got me a new guitar
and he's taking me to the Talent Show.

- What time is it? You'll never make it.
- Don't worry about that. We can make it.

You, that way. You guys, go upstairs
and get there soon. We'll see you.

Oh yeah.

- Where's your car?
- No car. Let's go.

Hang on.

- How is this happening?
- It's okay, it's okay.

Yeah, but like, how was it possible?

Well, it all started one night I
got a summons underneath my pillow.

What the heck is a summons?

A summons is like an invitation. I
got an invitation to go to Fairyland.

- Fairyland?
- It's where I got these cool wings.

I met this guy up there named Tracy.

He kinda looks like a walking
toothpick with the eyes of a big tuna.

By the way I can shrink
myself down to six inches.

Pretty good.

What?

Sorry buddy, I've already
broken enough rules.

Randy, there you are. We've
been looking all over for you.

You're coming up. Get in
there and tune up, come on.

- Another tooth.
- Thank you.

You're welcome. I've got
a concert I gotta get to.

No, you skidded quite a
few rules tonight, Mr. Thompson.

But wait, I took care of Carly.
I dusted Randy.

And Tess, she's only six
so pretty soon she'll forget.

And even if she doesn't
at least now she'll...

- She'll always...
- Always...what?

She will always...
Believe.

Like I will.

I get it. Dreams are
good for everyone.

Mr. Thompson, I hereby
relieve you of tooth fairy duty.

- Ah, you're good.
- She's a pro.

- Congratulations.
- Put that away.

I tend not to do the whole
physical contact thing.

Oh, you like me.
I know you like me.

You do the whole distant
administrator to me.

A thing which I understand but
somewhere in there, you like me.

- You like me.
- Well, let's not get frisky.

- I really gotta go.
- Yeah, could you wait just one second?

- Tracy, I need another word with you.
- Ah, what's this about?

Anybody that can rehabilitate
Mr. Thompson more than deserves this.

- What is it?
- It's your wings, Tracy.

Wear them with pride,
everytime you collect a new tooth.

- You're a tooth fairy, buddy.
- I got my wings.

You got your wings.

- You need this.
- I don't know why I'm speaking like this.

No...Thank you, my lady.

Listen, this is all great and
I'm very very proud of you.

You're the tallest tooth
fairy in the world now.

But I gotta go. Somebody's
got to put me down.

Tracy, would you like to
do the honors or shall I?

- Oh, so honors..oh, a gift! Yeah.
- I'm afraid not.

You'll not remember anything
that happened in Fairyland.

Why?

Coz that's just the way we do it.

I'll never forget you.

I can't believe you
showed up at the rink.

It's just the way we do things.

Thank you, Tracy.
For everything.

You big, four-eyed giraffe,
back to the zoo.

And you get that head
back to Easter Island.

- Hammer Brothers are still in town.
- Let me meet those guys.

- You're my man.
- And you are my fairy.

How can we make us stay in touch?
Can we email?

That's what I'm thinking.
We should be able to email each other.

Do you blog?
I do blog.

You write a blog. I would
love to read your blog.

You wanna read my blog?

- Do you facebook coz I could poke you?
- I love getting poked.

Oh, there you are.
I couldn't find you.

Yeah, I was just at...

- I am so exited.
- Me too.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

- Hi, honey.
- Hi Derek!

And then we go for our last
performer of the night, Randy Harris!

Randy!

Go Randy!

- Way to go, Randy!
- Great job!

Great, Randy!
That's my kid!

Hey, I was just wondering
what if we got married?

What if we got married?

That's what I said,
I said "what if"

- Yes!
- Yeah.

We're getting married.

Yeah, whoa!