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1
00:00:02,445 --> 00:00:04,826
The people who eat here are animals.
2
00:00:04,851 --> 00:00:07,659
And not like those cute
otters holding hands.
3
00:00:08,101 --> 00:00:09,538
I hate 'em all.
4
00:00:10,460 --> 00:00:12,367
I went over to check
on a table and this man
5
00:00:12,392 --> 00:00:15,326
wiped gloppy short
rib sauce on my shirt.
6
00:00:15,351 --> 00:00:16,645
Do I look like a napkin?
7
00:00:16,670 --> 00:00:18,570
Well, you do now.
8
00:00:19,663 --> 00:00:23,593
And by the way, that "gloppy
sauce" is a port wine reduction,
9
00:00:23,626 --> 00:00:26,500
and intentionally viscous.
10
00:00:28,664 --> 00:00:29,848
Ugh.
11
00:00:29,943 --> 00:00:32,444
I came out here for fresh
air, but that dream is dead.
12
00:00:32,469 --> 00:00:34,815
Let me toss it on the
pile with all your others.
13
00:00:35,272 --> 00:00:37,272
I doubt you can throw that high.
14
00:00:37,853 --> 00:00:39,445
It sounds like you need
15
00:00:39,470 --> 00:00:41,754
a delicious and calming cigarette.
16
00:00:41,779 --> 00:00:42,944
I don't smoke.
17
00:00:43,030 --> 00:00:45,781
In the words of the
great '80s poet Adam Ant,
18
00:00:45,866 --> 00:00:49,258
"Don't drink, don't
smoke, what do you do?"
19
00:00:51,348 --> 00:00:54,466
Hey, dude, I used to smoke, I
used to drink, I used to strip,
20
00:00:54,491 --> 00:00:56,408
I used to not come
home for days at a time.
21
00:00:56,433 --> 00:00:59,023
Mm, so what you're saying
is you used to be fun.
22
00:01:04,660 --> 00:01:05,826
Fine. Give me one.
23
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:13,074
Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become
a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM
24
00:01:18,848 --> 00:01:20,851
Oh, right.
25
00:01:23,961 --> 00:01:25,631
Thanks, I owe you one.
26
00:01:25,683 --> 00:01:28,300
Great. You want to come over
to my place after we close,
27
00:01:28,325 --> 00:01:30,108
"get chummy"?
28
00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:33,031
It's tobacco, not ecstasy.
29
00:01:33,817 --> 00:01:35,700
Would you like some ecstasy?
30
00:01:52,383 --> 00:01:55,836
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
31
00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:04,748
Why do we bother putting
the damn chairs away?
32
00:02:04,773 --> 00:02:06,857
We're just gonna have
another meeting tomorrow.
33
00:02:06,882 --> 00:02:08,966
There's ladies' Zumba in the morning.
34
00:02:08,991 --> 00:02:10,524
What is that, like a Kegel thing?
35
00:02:10,549 --> 00:02:12,633
Tightening the old hoo-ha?
36
00:02:13,586 --> 00:02:15,736
It's a dance-based exercise class,
37
00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:18,045
but your la-la does get a workout.
38
00:02:18,719 --> 00:02:20,514
Guys, we're all over 12.
39
00:02:20,549 --> 00:02:22,672
We can say "vagina."
40
00:02:23,385 --> 00:02:25,352
I did Zumba drunk once.
41
00:02:25,387 --> 00:02:27,125
Got kicked out.
42
00:02:27,150 --> 00:02:30,312
Maybe 'cause I kept yelling "Zumba!"
43
00:02:31,340 --> 00:02:33,256
And I peed in my leotard.
44
00:02:36,445 --> 00:02:38,484
- Oh, my God.
- What?
45
00:02:38,509 --> 00:02:39,792
I just got a text from this guy
46
00:02:39,817 --> 00:02:42,039
I met at The Home Depot yesterday.
47
00:02:42,064 --> 00:02:44,682
Wait, like, "met a guy" met a guy?
48
00:02:44,707 --> 00:02:46,265
You didn't tell me that. Spill.
49
00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:48,400
Well, he works there. I
needed to get a light switch,
50
00:02:48,425 --> 00:02:49,791
but I wasn't sure if I needed
51
00:02:49,816 --> 00:02:52,033
a 20-amp or if a
15-amp would cover it.
52
00:02:52,058 --> 00:02:53,257
- So then I...
- Get to the man part.
53
00:02:53,282 --> 00:02:56,539
So Rick... that's what
his lifting belt said...
54
00:02:56,635 --> 00:02:57,968
Swooped in and said even
55
00:02:57,993 --> 00:02:59,776
if I only needed a 15,
a 20 should be fine.
56
00:02:59,801 --> 00:03:01,384
And then he pushed you up
against the wall and kissed you.
57
00:03:01,557 --> 00:03:03,679
Sorry, I just got to
make the story better.
58
00:03:03,918 --> 00:03:05,953
He asked for my number, I
didn't think he'd use it.
59
00:03:05,978 --> 00:03:08,062
Now he wants to know "What's up?"
60
00:03:08,087 --> 00:03:09,859
How do I even respond to that?
61
00:03:09,884 --> 00:03:12,885
How about "Nothing much,
what's up with you?"
62
00:03:12,910 --> 00:03:16,216
Are you nuts? You want
to sound busy, in demand.
63
00:03:16,241 --> 00:03:17,875
Tell him you're at a gala.
64
00:03:17,900 --> 00:03:20,015
No, wait. You met him at Home Depot.
65
00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:21,923
Tell him you're at a county fair.
66
00:03:22,562 --> 00:03:23,910
Personally, I don't think
67
00:03:23,946 --> 00:03:26,079
you should start a
relationship off on a lie.
68
00:03:26,104 --> 00:03:27,436
Go with "not much."
69
00:03:30,594 --> 00:03:33,462
Oh, man, which tiny
blonde should I believe?
70
00:03:34,812 --> 00:03:36,937
Well, Christy's my
daughter and I love her,
71
00:03:36,970 --> 00:03:39,688
but if you want any hope of a
romantic life, listen to Jill.
72
00:03:40,195 --> 00:03:41,461
"At a fair."
73
00:03:41,513 --> 00:03:43,130
Hey, I date.
74
00:03:43,155 --> 00:03:46,320
You do. Not recently, but you do.
75
00:03:48,210 --> 00:03:50,195
Whoa, he texted back already.
76
00:03:50,220 --> 00:03:52,553
And he asked me out
on a date! "Anytime... "
77
00:03:52,578 --> 00:03:56,281
No, no, no. You're eating
funnel cake at a fair, remember?
78
00:03:56,306 --> 00:03:57,797
Yeah, you're not just staring
79
00:03:57,822 --> 00:03:59,572
at your phone like some kind of Christy.
80
00:04:00,945 --> 00:04:02,109
I don't do that.
81
00:04:02,134 --> 00:04:05,719
I blame myself. It's why I'm
trying to do better with Tammy.
82
00:04:06,063 --> 00:04:08,397
- Marjorie, everyone's picking on me.
- I know,
83
00:04:08,422 --> 00:04:11,179
and the fact that they're
right doesn't justify it.
84
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:13,008
You know what?
85
00:04:13,033 --> 00:04:15,701
My homework is more fun than this.
86
00:04:15,726 --> 00:04:18,226
And yeah, that's a dig, guys.
87
00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:20,172
It's a dig.
88
00:04:21,277 --> 00:04:24,134
- So when do I text him back?
- I'll let you know.
89
00:04:28,510 --> 00:04:29,554
Sharon.
90
00:04:29,579 --> 00:04:30,904
Oh, hey, Christy.
91
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,234
Can I bum one of those?
92
00:04:32,259 --> 00:04:34,470
Sure. I didn't know you were a smoker.
93
00:04:34,495 --> 00:04:36,128
Only on Wednesdays.
94
00:04:36,153 --> 00:04:37,319
It's Thursday.
95
00:04:37,608 --> 00:04:39,219
Just light the cigarette, Sharon.
96
00:04:43,390 --> 00:04:44,812
Thank you.
97
00:04:47,335 --> 00:04:49,945
I'm just gonna go smoke
this behind that bush.
98
00:04:54,539 --> 00:04:55,719
I'll see you over there.
99
00:04:55,786 --> 00:04:57,202
Yeah.
100
00:05:03,952 --> 00:05:05,203
Now.
101
00:05:09,376 --> 00:05:10,656
Morons.
102
00:05:15,785 --> 00:05:18,202
Hi, can I have ten
dollars on pump three?
103
00:05:18,227 --> 00:05:19,392
You got it.
104
00:05:21,305 --> 00:05:22,281
Actually,
105
00:05:22,306 --> 00:05:24,291
can I have five dollars on pump three
106
00:05:24,316 --> 00:05:25,699
and a pack of the Lights?
107
00:05:25,961 --> 00:05:27,320
Those are nine dollars.
108
00:05:27,345 --> 00:05:29,645
Really? Wow.
109
00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:35,422
Okay, give me one dollar on pump
three and a pack of the lights.
110
00:05:49,308 --> 00:05:52,122
I don't like that Tammy's
date is picking her up here.
111
00:05:52,214 --> 00:05:55,075
Now if he's a murderer,
he knows where she lives.
112
00:05:55,481 --> 00:05:57,264
That's the third time you've mentioned
113
00:05:57,289 --> 00:05:59,318
that she might get killed on this date.
114
00:05:59,343 --> 00:06:02,412
Where is all this murder
anxiety coming from?
115
00:06:02,437 --> 00:06:04,411
From being a woman, Marjorie.
116
00:06:05,099 --> 00:06:06,158
Okay!
117
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:09,341
Get ready. Tammy, come on out,
and show them what you got.
118
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,911
Ooh! Wow!
119
00:06:13,407 --> 00:06:16,169
I know, right? I'm a piece.
120
00:06:16,752 --> 00:06:20,287
I'm so nervous, first date out
of prison, first date sober.
121
00:06:20,319 --> 00:06:23,183
It's just like going on a date
drunk, only much, much scarier.
122
00:06:23,208 --> 00:06:24,591
'Cause you're a woman.
123
00:06:24,626 --> 00:06:26,107
You'll be great.
124
00:06:26,132 --> 00:06:28,401
What if he orders a cocktail
and asks me if I want one?
125
00:06:28,426 --> 00:06:29,575
What do I say then?
126
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:31,275
You don't have to tell your whole story.
127
00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:33,224
Just say you don't feel
like drinking tonight.
128
00:06:33,321 --> 00:06:34,857
Or tell him you can't drink
129
00:06:34,897 --> 00:06:36,263
'cause you're taking antibiotics.
130
00:06:36,288 --> 00:06:37,904
How is that gonna work
if they keep dating?
131
00:06:37,929 --> 00:06:40,140
Yeah, then he'll think
she has some horrible STD
132
00:06:40,165 --> 00:06:42,154
that Western medicine
just can't knock out.
133
00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:45,318
But he won't know she's sober.
134
00:06:45,343 --> 00:06:48,256
Maybe you should stop focusing
on whether he's gonna like you
135
00:06:48,281 --> 00:06:50,551
and see if you even like him.
136
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,652
You're Tammy frickin' Diffendorf.
137
00:06:52,677 --> 00:06:54,294
You are beautiful and fierce
138
00:06:54,319 --> 00:06:56,412
and he's lucky you're
even going out with him.
139
00:06:56,437 --> 00:06:58,404
Wow!
140
00:06:58,827 --> 00:07:02,076
You guys just turned
my whole world around.
141
00:07:02,362 --> 00:07:05,607
I am going out on this
date with a blown mind.
142
00:07:06,005 --> 00:07:07,639
He's pulling up. lt's happening!
143
00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:10,232
Okay, when he knocks... Out of my way!
144
00:07:17,587 --> 00:07:19,670
Are we still worried about him, Wendy?
145
00:07:25,782 --> 00:07:28,032
Well, well, well.
146
00:07:29,701 --> 00:07:32,118
Look who's here to
bum another cigarette.
147
00:07:32,415 --> 00:07:33,497
I have my own.
148
00:07:33,522 --> 00:07:36,306
Ooh, your own pack. That was fast.
149
00:07:36,982 --> 00:07:38,915
I still only smoke once in a while,
150
00:07:38,940 --> 00:07:40,639
I just don't want to be seen as needy.
151
00:07:40,664 --> 00:07:42,580
Mm. I think with that
voice and those eyes,
152
00:07:42,605 --> 00:07:44,428
that's always gonna be a problem.
153
00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:46,990
I can take care of myself.
154
00:07:51,142 --> 00:07:52,558
Oh, Christy,
155
00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:53,740
face it.
156
00:07:53,765 --> 00:07:55,098
You're a real smoker,
157
00:07:55,272 --> 00:07:57,845
and a real smoker should
have her own lighter.
158
00:07:58,950 --> 00:08:00,333
This was my father's.
159
00:08:02,157 --> 00:08:04,207
And now it's yours.
160
00:08:05,048 --> 00:08:07,931
- Seriously?
- No, I got it from a busboy.
161
00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:12,275
Although it was his father's.
162
00:08:14,977 --> 00:08:17,612
What started out as dinner and a movie
163
00:08:17,637 --> 00:08:21,345
ended as dinner and a murder.
164
00:08:22,556 --> 00:08:24,304
I'm getting scared.
165
00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:25,962
Marjorie, change the channel.
166
00:08:27,125 --> 00:08:28,461
Marjorie!
167
00:08:32,439 --> 00:08:33,555
Uh-oh.
168
00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:36,548
Yup, there it is.
169
00:08:37,923 --> 00:08:40,626
What do you know, I am
gonna be sad when she goes.
170
00:08:41,390 --> 00:08:42,913
Tammy's back.
171
00:08:43,767 --> 00:08:45,649
Best date ever.
172
00:08:45,674 --> 00:08:48,925
Really? Oh! Marjorie,
wake up, she's home.
173
00:08:48,950 --> 00:08:50,533
I'm awake.
174
00:08:51,806 --> 00:08:53,118
Tell us everything.
175
00:08:53,143 --> 00:08:54,809
Well, I'm so lucky
you guys dressed me up,
176
00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:57,227
because he took me to Olive Garden.
177
00:08:58,430 --> 00:09:00,743
Okay, I've been watching those
commercials for seven years
178
00:09:00,768 --> 00:09:03,795
from prison and if
anything, they undersell it.
179
00:09:04,229 --> 00:09:07,018
- What's he like?
- Oh, he's funny, he's smart...
180
00:09:07,042 --> 00:09:09,584
- And get this, he doesn't drink.
- Is he an alcoholic?
181
00:09:09,609 --> 00:09:12,443
No, he has irritable bowel syndrome.
182
00:09:13,580 --> 00:09:15,306
He sounds perfect.
183
00:09:15,940 --> 00:09:17,523
Doesn't he, Marjorie?
184
00:09:19,302 --> 00:09:22,303
Oh, Lord, let's at least shut her mouth.
185
00:09:29,063 --> 00:09:31,146
Tape? Anybody got any tape?
186
00:09:32,242 --> 00:09:34,118
Was there a good-night kiss?
187
00:09:34,143 --> 00:09:35,660
A lady doesn't kiss and tell,
188
00:09:35,685 --> 00:09:38,026
but I'm no lady, so let me
tell you about the kissing.
189
00:09:38,221 --> 00:09:39,447
It was awesome!
190
00:09:39,472 --> 00:09:41,639
You know the kind of kiss
that leaves you light-headed?
191
00:09:41,691 --> 00:09:43,401
No.
192
00:09:44,244 --> 00:09:46,588
Look at you... you went on
a date, you stayed sober,
193
00:09:46,613 --> 00:09:48,657
your clothes aren't inside out.
194
00:09:48,682 --> 00:09:50,041
You didn't bring any of
their breadsticks home
195
00:09:50,066 --> 00:09:52,617
for your friend Bonnie,
but otherwise, a success.
196
00:09:52,652 --> 00:09:53,534
That's what you think.
197
00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:56,654
- What a night!
- I know!
198
00:09:57,049 --> 00:09:59,100
So when can I text him
to tell him I had fun?
199
00:09:59,125 --> 00:10:02,251
- Never. Wait for him to text you.
- But I want to.
200
00:10:02,276 --> 00:10:04,197
Go ahead. A little "I had
a good time" won't hurt.
201
00:10:04,226 --> 00:10:06,641
They're still warm.
202
00:10:06,666 --> 00:10:08,892
Thanks, Bonnie. "Had a nice time.
203
00:10:08,917 --> 00:10:10,500
Can't wait to see you again."
204
00:10:10,553 --> 00:10:11,669
I guess that's okay.
205
00:10:11,721 --> 00:10:12,837
"I think you're the one."
206
00:10:12,889 --> 00:10:14,138
No! No! No!
207
00:10:16,021 --> 00:10:18,729
Oh. How'd it go?
208
00:10:33,255 --> 00:10:34,541
Hi, Jill.
209
00:10:35,357 --> 00:10:39,111
I'm almost there,
driving as fast as I can.
210
00:10:39,952 --> 00:10:41,368
Bye.
211
00:11:32,281 --> 00:11:33,875
That was easy.
212
00:11:36,258 --> 00:11:38,587
I'm starving. Can we please order?
213
00:11:38,612 --> 00:11:39,911
Aren't we gonna wait for Christy?
214
00:11:39,936 --> 00:11:42,047
No, 'cause I get rude when I'm hangry.
215
00:11:42,072 --> 00:11:43,622
We're ready, we're ready!
216
00:11:43,647 --> 00:11:46,570
Oh, I am so gonna get her fired.
217
00:11:46,595 --> 00:11:48,870
Why isn't Rick texting me back?
218
00:11:48,895 --> 00:11:50,011
I'm gonna text him again.
219
00:11:50,036 --> 00:11:51,180
Tammy, I wouldn't.
220
00:11:51,205 --> 00:11:53,672
You texted him four times in
the car on the way over here.
221
00:11:53,697 --> 00:11:55,030
How do I put this gently?
222
00:11:55,189 --> 00:11:56,772
That's something Christy would do.
223
00:11:56,858 --> 00:11:58,224
I just really like him,
224
00:11:58,276 --> 00:12:00,059
and I haven't liked
anyone in a long time.
225
00:12:00,144 --> 00:12:02,361
Which is great, but just take it slow.
226
00:12:02,397 --> 00:12:04,184
Food!
227
00:12:04,981 --> 00:12:07,064
I think I have some almonds in my purse.
228
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:09,785
No.
229
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:13,359
Maybe my phone is broken.
Will you just text me?
230
00:12:13,384 --> 00:12:15,184
No, you're obsessed with this guy.
231
00:12:15,209 --> 00:12:17,209
"This guy"? His name is Rick something
232
00:12:17,245 --> 00:12:19,412
and he means a lot to me.
233
00:12:19,497 --> 00:12:22,081
Hi, guys. Sorry I'm late.
234
00:12:22,106 --> 00:12:25,561
Traffic. What is happening to Napa?
235
00:12:25,586 --> 00:12:27,219
Have you been smoking?
236
00:12:27,735 --> 00:12:29,115
Why would you ask me that?
237
00:12:29,140 --> 00:12:31,223
Because you smell like
mouth wash, air freshener,
238
00:12:31,248 --> 00:12:33,381
Purell and dryer sheets.
239
00:12:33,489 --> 00:12:35,655
It's like sitting next to a
freshly cleaned motel room.
240
00:12:36,544 --> 00:12:39,098
I'm not smoking. Did we order yet?
241
00:12:39,243 --> 00:12:41,494
No, 'cause this is hell.
242
00:12:42,899 --> 00:12:45,665
- Why do you have a lighter?
- Why are you going through my purse?
243
00:12:45,690 --> 00:12:47,801
- I'm your mother.
- What does that have to do with it?
244
00:12:47,826 --> 00:12:50,262
You came out of my pocketbook,
I get to rifle through yours.
245
00:12:53,754 --> 00:12:57,583
Okay, yes, I'm smoking,
246
00:12:57,679 --> 00:12:59,846
but I'm not drinking, I'm not gambling,
247
00:12:59,871 --> 00:13:01,407
I'm not sleeping with married men.
248
00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:02,565
Let me have this.
249
00:13:02,590 --> 00:13:04,673
It's him!
250
00:13:05,004 --> 00:13:07,103
Shoot, Amber Alert.
251
00:13:07,340 --> 00:13:10,763
White pickup, Utah plates.
Keep your eyes open.
252
00:13:11,122 --> 00:13:13,503
Tammy, stop with the phone.
You're driving yourself crazy.
253
00:13:13,528 --> 00:13:16,362
You're driving us all crazy.
You're acting pathetic.
254
00:13:18,939 --> 00:13:22,637
Not him, but, yes, Wendy,
Bonnie was a little harsh.
255
00:13:25,426 --> 00:13:28,374
Not out loud. You
trying to get me killed?
256
00:13:31,454 --> 00:13:34,419
Hi, I'd like to make
an order for delivery.
257
00:13:34,444 --> 00:13:37,479
Yeah, my address is the
booth with the woman waving.
258
00:13:52,089 --> 00:13:53,472
Yeah?
259
00:13:54,497 --> 00:13:56,976
Hey, Bonnie, what's happening?
260
00:13:57,706 --> 00:13:59,520
What is happening?
261
00:14:01,315 --> 00:14:04,065
You gals talking about Zumba
262
00:14:04,090 --> 00:14:07,019
inspired me to get out
my old Jazzercise tapes.
263
00:14:07,131 --> 00:14:10,504
There's a lot to mock here,
but I need your advice.
264
00:14:11,543 --> 00:14:13,739
This thing with Tammy is driving me...
265
00:14:14,453 --> 00:14:16,450
Okay, we need to lose this.
266
00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:18,891
I just don't know what to do.
267
00:14:18,916 --> 00:14:21,166
She's gonna get her heart
broken and I'm worried about her.
268
00:14:21,202 --> 00:14:23,202
What?
269
00:14:23,692 --> 00:14:25,431
I'm taking a moment to enjoy
270
00:14:25,456 --> 00:14:28,173
that you're worrying about
somebody other than yourself.
271
00:14:29,487 --> 00:14:30,686
You've really changed.
272
00:14:30,711 --> 00:14:32,567
Oh. Thank you.
273
00:14:33,442 --> 00:14:36,520
You can have this back.
It's actually kind of wet.
274
00:14:37,747 --> 00:14:39,278
Okay, here's the deal,
275
00:14:39,303 --> 00:14:40,640
I know what's best for Tammy.
276
00:14:40,665 --> 00:14:42,448
How do I get her to listen to me?
277
00:14:42,473 --> 00:14:44,857
You don't know what's
best for her, Bonnie.
278
00:14:44,953 --> 00:14:46,953
She has to have her own experiences.
279
00:14:46,978 --> 00:14:50,623
The only thing you can do
is share yours, if she asks.
280
00:14:50,648 --> 00:14:52,690
- But she's not asking.
- Well, then shut up.
281
00:14:52,715 --> 00:14:54,106
You shut up.
282
00:14:55,247 --> 00:14:57,213
Sorry, you were saying?
283
00:14:57,598 --> 00:14:59,698
You know, when you started dating Adam,
284
00:14:59,783 --> 00:15:01,651
I thought you were making a big mistake.
285
00:15:01,676 --> 00:15:02,935
What's wrong with Adam?
286
00:15:03,270 --> 00:15:05,244
Well, I just didn't like him,
287
00:15:05,296 --> 00:15:06,912
and I didn't think you were ready,
288
00:15:06,991 --> 00:15:08,774
but you proved me wrong because you are
289
00:15:08,799 --> 00:15:11,253
handling this relationship
so beautifully.
290
00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:15,314
Thank you. What exactly
didn't you like about him?
291
00:15:15,575 --> 00:15:19,391
Well, he had a certain
swagger I didn't appreciate,
292
00:15:19,762 --> 00:15:22,761
and apparently, before you,
he was a bit of a tomcat.
293
00:15:22,813 --> 00:15:27,266
"Swagger"? That's a great
way to put it. So arrogant.
294
00:15:27,318 --> 00:15:29,435
My point is, I was wrong.
295
00:15:29,487 --> 00:15:30,653
I'm not sure you were.
296
00:15:30,738 --> 00:15:32,917
We're running into
ex-girlfriends all the time.
297
00:15:32,942 --> 00:15:34,250
- Bonnie, listen...
- Williams-Sonoma,
298
00:15:34,275 --> 00:15:36,979
I am buying nice plates for
the first time in my life,
299
00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,220
and who's wrapping them up?
300
00:15:38,245 --> 00:15:40,613
Jaqueline with her
big, fake fingernails.
301
00:15:41,843 --> 00:15:43,643
Why didn't you tell me this back then?
302
00:15:43,668 --> 00:15:46,020
You didn't ask for my opinion,
303
00:15:46,739 --> 00:15:48,898
like Tammy hasn't asked for yours.
304
00:15:48,923 --> 00:15:51,090
Fine, fine, got it.
305
00:15:51,115 --> 00:15:54,917
Okay. Now if you don't mind,
306
00:15:54,942 --> 00:15:56,972
I would like to go back to Jazzercise.
307
00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:58,574
Would you like to join me?
308
00:15:58,599 --> 00:16:02,294
I would not, but I
definitely want to watch.
309
00:16:15,278 --> 00:16:16,620
Hi.
310
00:16:16,645 --> 00:16:18,751
- Hi.
- You okay?
311
00:16:18,776 --> 00:16:22,194
Uh, yeah, I just pulled
a muscle Jazzercising.
312
00:16:23,778 --> 00:16:25,958
By the way, your ass
appears to be on fire.
313
00:16:27,661 --> 00:16:30,496
Fine, caught me. Cue the lecture.
314
00:16:30,559 --> 00:16:31,641
No lecture.
315
00:16:31,666 --> 00:16:32,831
Oh, come on, you don't think
316
00:16:32,856 --> 00:16:34,243
this is self-destructive behavior?
317
00:16:34,268 --> 00:16:35,668
Oh, honey,
318
00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:38,671
I get it. I went through the whole
319
00:16:38,696 --> 00:16:41,813
"finding ways to be
naughty in sobriety" thing.
320
00:16:42,518 --> 00:16:45,454
In fact, when I had about five years,
321
00:16:45,479 --> 00:16:48,180
I developed a massive crush on Marvin,
322
00:16:48,205 --> 00:16:50,587
the guy that I had the
coffee commitment with.
323
00:16:50,612 --> 00:16:51,661
Ooh.
324
00:16:51,686 --> 00:16:55,320
No, not "ooh." He was
married and so was I.
325
00:16:55,356 --> 00:16:57,690
- Ooh.
- Yeah.
326
00:16:57,715 --> 00:17:00,196
All we did was flirt, but...
327
00:17:00,221 --> 00:17:02,254
it did give me a thrill,
328
00:17:02,279 --> 00:17:04,663
and at the time, I really needed that.
329
00:17:04,759 --> 00:17:06,308
So what happened?
330
00:17:06,333 --> 00:17:08,667
Oh, I kept working the
program, and so did he,
331
00:17:08,703 --> 00:17:12,504
and we got better and
the flirting stopped.
332
00:17:12,540 --> 00:17:16,044
Also, one night he wore a denim vest.
333
00:17:18,129 --> 00:17:20,656
Well, my Marvin and
I are still flirting.
334
00:17:20,681 --> 00:17:24,747
Okay. I'll see you inside.
335
00:17:30,122 --> 00:17:32,106
What was I trying to prove?
336
00:17:40,151 --> 00:17:42,911
Hi, Bonnie.
337
00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:45,122
Hi, Tammy.
338
00:17:46,153 --> 00:17:49,185
I'm calling 'cause I owe you an apology.
339
00:17:49,271 --> 00:17:51,030
I was too hard on you.
340
00:17:51,055 --> 00:17:52,304
You're not pathetic
341
00:17:52,329 --> 00:17:55,297
and I was wrong to say you
were obsessing about Rick.
342
00:17:56,044 --> 00:17:59,167
Thanks, Big Sauce, that
means a lot. You're forgiven.
343
00:17:59,192 --> 00:18:01,707
Good. So what are you up to?
344
00:18:01,732 --> 00:18:04,066
I'm sitting across the
street from Rick's house.
345
00:18:06,970 --> 00:18:08,136
Are you?
346
00:18:08,161 --> 00:18:10,239
And I may have binoculars.
347
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:15,302
- Uh-huh.
- Am I as crazy as I feel?
348
00:18:15,342 --> 00:18:18,200
- Are you asking my opinion?
- I am.
349
00:18:20,139 --> 00:18:22,472
Where are you exactly?
350
00:18:26,649 --> 00:18:29,116
You took an Uber to stalk a guy?
351
00:18:29,152 --> 00:18:30,818
You know I don't drive.
352
00:18:30,870 --> 00:18:33,871
- Bonnie, Yuri. Yuri, Bonnie.
- Good evening.
353
00:18:33,896 --> 00:18:36,017
Uh, would you like to have
mint, water, phone charger?
354
00:18:36,042 --> 00:18:37,158
I'm fine.
355
00:18:37,243 --> 00:18:40,377
Why are you doing this?
Eh, as long as I'm here.
356
00:18:40,463 --> 00:18:41,750
I still hadn't heard from Rick,
357
00:18:41,775 --> 00:18:43,558
so I went to Home Depot to say hi,
358
00:18:43,583 --> 00:18:45,833
and he walks away and
says he has to do something
359
00:18:45,885 --> 00:18:47,885
in aisle three, so I
follow him to aisle three
360
00:18:47,910 --> 00:18:49,910
and he's not doing
anything. So I say to him,
361
00:18:50,006 --> 00:18:51,222
"You're not doing anything,"
362
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:52,950
and he says, "I can't talk right now.
363
00:18:52,975 --> 00:18:55,009
I'll call you later when I get home."
364
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:58,520
Six hours go by, no call, so
I came to see if he's home.
365
00:18:58,545 --> 00:19:00,200
He's home!
366
00:19:00,542 --> 00:19:03,465
He can clearly be seen
eating pizza in his boxers.
367
00:19:03,930 --> 00:19:05,513
So what do I do?
368
00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:08,022
In my experience,
369
00:19:08,074 --> 00:19:11,192
if a guy would rather eat
alone in his underwear,
370
00:19:11,244 --> 00:19:13,027
he's not interested.
371
00:19:13,112 --> 00:19:15,496
- I know.
- You do?
372
00:19:15,538 --> 00:19:18,604
I just didn't want
to admit it to myself.
373
00:19:18,864 --> 00:19:22,180
Tissues are in pocket in front of you.
374
00:19:22,205 --> 00:19:24,672
I'm gonna be single the rest of my life.
375
00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:27,875
No, you're not. I have
done way worse than this.
376
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,543
Sitting outside his house?
377
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:30,855
Try moving into his attic
378
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:32,280
without him knowing for three weeks.
379
00:19:32,408 --> 00:19:34,325
You didn't really do that.
380
00:19:34,350 --> 00:19:36,884
Sure did. There was a website
warning people about me.
381
00:19:38,604 --> 00:19:40,187
But now I'm getting married,
382
00:19:40,223 --> 00:19:42,223
and I'm not as crazy as I used to be,
383
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,748
and I found a guy who loves
the crazy that's still there.
384
00:19:44,773 --> 00:19:46,504
You're gonna learn from
this, and next time,
385
00:19:46,529 --> 00:19:47,695
you'll do it differently.
386
00:19:47,730 --> 00:19:49,730
If there ever is a next time.
387
00:19:49,755 --> 00:19:52,473
It may not happen right
away, but it will happen.
388
00:19:55,732 --> 00:19:57,431
I think you've waited long enough.
389
00:19:57,456 --> 00:19:59,911
May I take you for dinner sometime?
390
00:20:00,946 --> 00:20:05,114
I'd love that. Let's
go now! Bonnie, out!
391
00:20:05,416 --> 00:20:08,417
- Hey, can we go to Olive Garden?
- No problem.
392
00:20:19,302 --> 00:20:21,919
You don't do anything halfway, do you?
393
00:20:21,944 --> 00:20:24,528
Are you gonna smoke
with me or just judge?
394
00:20:24,553 --> 00:20:27,318
- No, thanks, I quit.
- How?
395
00:20:27,343 --> 00:20:30,317
I just stopped. It's
called having character.
396
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,353
Have fun out here.
397
00:20:32,378 --> 00:20:34,247
I will!
398
00:20:43,036 --> 00:20:44,567
Oh...
399
00:20:44,765 --> 00:20:46,348
Oh, come on!
400
00:20:47,812 --> 00:20:52,215
-- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe --
-- www.addic7ed.com --
401
00:20:53,305 --> 00:20:59,888
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