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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,603 --> 00:00:16,603 www.titlovi.com 2 00:00:19,603 --> 00:00:23,566 Hi. I'm Steven Weber. And I play the murderer... 3 00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:24,858 Thanks, Lyle. 4 00:00:24,942 --> 00:00:27,653 ...in this Handsome mystery movie. 5 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:31,740 Enjoy this exciting multiplatform event. 6 00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:33,867 [exhales sharply] 7 00:00:35,452 --> 00:00:37,495 [surf rock music playing] 8 00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:50,611 [narrator] Tonight, "A Lil' Dab'll Do Ya." 9 00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:57,242 As a detective, there's no greater skill that you can hone than your intuition. 10 00:01:58,243 --> 00:02:01,246 I mean, if you can't trust your gut, 11 00:02:01,872 --> 00:02:04,332 you might as well be in parking enforcement. 12 00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:07,920 -Yeah, I mean, go be a meter maid. -A meter man. 13 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:12,049 Very good, Detective Rice. Very good. 14 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,551 You're looking at everything from all angles. 15 00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:18,138 All right, let's take a look at the board, shall we? 16 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:21,516 What do you see? What does your gut tell you? 17 00:02:21,599 --> 00:02:23,101 I'm looking at the boner. 18 00:02:24,602 --> 00:02:26,438 That man's dick is hard. 19 00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:29,399 I think it's the classic Margaritaville theory. 20 00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:30,567 The theory that states 21 00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:34,363 if a middle-aged man has too much laid-back fun, he ceases to exist. 22 00:02:34,947 --> 00:02:37,157 Yeah. Anyone else got a theory? 23 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,951 Detective Burt Jerpis. 24 00:02:39,034 --> 00:02:41,787 I know, Detective Jerpis. I hired you. 25 00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:45,290 We see this guy here, sure. But is that the whole story? 26 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:46,792 How do we know that this guy doesn't work 27 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:49,502 at a rental car agency at the airport, all right? 28 00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:52,297 And it's his boss' last day. Maybe that guy's name is Roger. 29 00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:53,841 Roger loves to golf. 30 00:02:53,924 --> 00:02:56,259 So he and all of his coworkers dress up like Roger. 31 00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:59,054 Golfers. And you wanna know what Roger always wanted to do? 32 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:01,348 Skydivings. So they all get in the car, 33 00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:04,184 they go over to the airstrip and they get in the skydivings plane. 34 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,561 They get up to 20,000 feet and they get into an argument. 35 00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:07,730 Maybe it's about a girl, 36 00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:10,315 maybe it's about who had the right recipe for the veggie chili. 37 00:03:10,398 --> 00:03:12,192 We don't know the answer to that yet. 38 00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:15,153 But then argument breaks out and this guy gets strangled. 39 00:03:15,237 --> 00:03:16,947 He gets thrown out of that skydivings plane. 40 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,324 Guess where he lands, of all places? 41 00:03:19,407 --> 00:03:22,160 -Golf course. Case closed. -You know what? 42 00:03:22,244 --> 00:03:23,829 Let's not trust our guts. 43 00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:27,415 I'm sorry. [sighs] That's not the boner of a man still livin'. 44 00:03:27,499 --> 00:03:30,085 Handsome! We need to talk now. 45 00:03:31,419 --> 00:03:32,921 Yes, Lieutenant. 46 00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:34,882 Yes. 47 00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:37,175 You didn't fill out your retirement papers. 48 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:40,387 -You pulled me out here for that? -I thought you should know. 49 00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:42,765 Of course I know. I'm the one who didn't fill 'em out. 50 00:03:42,848 --> 00:03:45,433 Don't try to complicate things with your sweet talk. 51 00:03:46,101 --> 00:03:47,310 Sweet talk? 52 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:50,438 You poor, innocent kid. You just don't get it, do you? 53 00:03:52,024 --> 00:03:53,358 No. 54 00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:58,321 -What were we talking about? -I have no idea. 55 00:03:58,405 --> 00:04:02,450 Believe me, I'll remember. And when I do, you'll know, missy. 56 00:04:02,534 --> 00:04:03,535 Connie! 57 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:06,955 [sighs] 58 00:04:07,039 --> 00:04:08,832 [indistinct chatter] 59 00:04:14,546 --> 00:04:16,882 I just remembered what it was. [chuckles] 60 00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:19,802 We have so many leftovers from Waikiki Wednesday, 61 00:04:19,885 --> 00:04:21,678 I think you should take these home. 62 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:24,848 No, no, no, I'm good. I'm trying to watch my weight-- 63 00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,474 Oh, no, you don't understand. 64 00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:28,811 -They've got thick frosting... -Yeah. 65 00:04:28,894 --> 00:04:31,897 -...smeared just the way you like it. -Yeah. 66 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:35,483 And they're shaped like beach balls that just bounce right into your mouth, 67 00:04:35,567 --> 00:04:39,237 bounce right into your belly and bounce right outta your butt. Hmm? 68 00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:42,866 I'm, uh... There's no way I'm taking these, uh, home with me. 69 00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,326 [Tucker] Hmm? Hmm? 70 00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:51,041 [engine stops] 71 00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,841 [car door creaks] 72 00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:03,511 [grunts] 73 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:20,153 Hello, Candy. Hello. 74 00:05:21,071 --> 00:05:22,280 [sighs] 75 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:27,535 These are not mine. That's all I'm saying. Don't ask. 76 00:05:37,712 --> 00:05:39,214 [sighs heavily] 77 00:05:40,132 --> 00:05:43,176 Yeah. Every day's a tough one. 78 00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:44,386 Every day's a tough one, 79 00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:46,513 but it's so much better when I come home to you. 80 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:50,433 I love you. I love you so much. You're so pretty. 81 00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:54,687 Do me a favor. See those cookies? 82 00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:56,982 Don't let me eat 'em. 83 00:05:57,900 --> 00:06:02,779 You hear me? If I go near those cookies, you knock my ass over, all right? 84 00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,908 'Cause you're capable of doing that, you big fucker. 85 00:06:05,991 --> 00:06:07,534 [sighs heavily] 86 00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:13,540 Yeah, let's go for a walk. 87 00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:19,087 [Durante] Hey, Handsome, don't pretend I'm not here. 88 00:06:19,171 --> 00:06:20,172 Durante. 89 00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:23,967 Stop letting your dog shit on my lawn. 90 00:06:26,178 --> 00:06:29,306 -Not hers. Don't recognize it. -Of course it's hers. 91 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:32,392 It looks like her, curled up as a piece of shit. 92 00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:33,935 Okay, look at her. 93 00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:37,272 She's not even looking at it. She knows it's not hers. 94 00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:40,442 There's no caginess about her. No recognition whatsoever. 95 00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:43,361 -She's just playing it cool. -Look into her eyes. 96 00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:45,738 They're pools of pure tranquility. 97 00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,574 You think you can read a perp better than me? 98 00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:50,785 You've lost it. You know that, right? Happens to the best of us. 99 00:06:50,868 --> 00:06:53,121 You used to investigate real crime. 100 00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:55,999 Now you're chasing around cheating husbands, 101 00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:58,961 hanging outside of crappy motels in Venice. 102 00:06:59,044 --> 00:07:01,046 You know what makes this country great? 103 00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:03,465 It's not that everybody's cheating on their spouses, 104 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:04,799 because they're not. 105 00:07:04,882 --> 00:07:09,012 It's that everyone unconsciously feels cheated. 106 00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:13,808 That's right. By the government, by their bosses, by Whole Foods. 107 00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:17,895 And then they transfer that suspicion onto their loved one. 108 00:07:17,980 --> 00:07:22,859 And it's that very feeling that keeps me in such great business. 109 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:25,946 I'm thinking of buying a Ferrari. 110 00:07:26,029 --> 00:07:28,991 Well, I just put 50 bucks into my IRA account. 111 00:07:29,074 --> 00:07:32,702 And in lieu of getting a Tesla, I'm gonna retire soon-ish. 112 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:37,832 -That job really wears on a person. -It does. It really does. 113 00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:42,087 -Hey, uh, you got new neighbors. -On the other side? When? 114 00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:45,590 Are you not paying attention? A couple of weeks ago. 115 00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:48,885 Renters. Looks like a single mom and her kid. 116 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,846 -Maybe the kid took the dump. -I just saw nervous fidgeting. 117 00:07:51,929 --> 00:07:55,058 That was nervous fidgeting. That's definitely nervous fidgeting. 118 00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:58,061 Of course Candy's fidgeting. You know where I found her? 119 00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:01,731 I found her abandoned in a foreclosed house in Burbank. 120 00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:04,234 Buona sera, Handsome. 121 00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:06,987 Ah... Buona sera, Esta. 122 00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:09,906 Hmm. Why are we wishing each other good evening? 123 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:14,327 It is just... an okay sera. Just okay. 124 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:17,289 [stutters] Well, it just started. It could get a lot better. 125 00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:19,791 Mmm. I don't think so. 126 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,340 [playing slow-tempo tune] 127 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:34,097 I still don't know what she sees in you. I'm guessing she likes to be depressed. 128 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:37,100 I could say the same thing about your dog. 129 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:40,062 Yeah. We're gonna go back on our walk. 130 00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:45,442 [Durante] I get it. Your dog has had a tragic history. 131 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:48,070 But don't let her shit on my lawn. 132 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:50,822 [sighs] Go. 133 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,200 [sighs] 134 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:43,291 -Can I help you? -Hi. I'm your neighbor, Gene Handsome. 135 00:09:43,375 --> 00:09:45,627 I thought I'd come and welcome you to the neighborhood 136 00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:48,463 by, uh, bringing you and your daughter some cookies. 137 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:51,299 -I'm the babysitter. -Oh! Okay, well, then, 138 00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:54,636 -you can take the cookies. -I'm not opening this door. 139 00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:59,391 I commend your cautiousness. You seem like an A-plus sitter. 140 00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:05,480 But, as I said, I live next door. I am an officer of the law. 141 00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:07,899 So you really got nothin' to worry about. 142 00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,859 I'm sorry. I'm not comfortable opening the door. 143 00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,113 You think I'm a creep. [chuckles] 144 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:16,324 Oh, my God, that's the last thing I wanna be, is a creep. 145 00:10:16,408 --> 00:10:20,745 No, no, no, that's not my intention. That's not who I am. 146 00:10:20,828 --> 00:10:24,166 I mean, you can go put them on the porch, but I can't say anyone's gonna eat them. 147 00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:31,172 I'm gonna leave them right over here, but you gotta do me a favor. 148 00:10:32,089 --> 00:10:35,260 After I go, please bring in the cookies. 149 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,595 'Cause later tonight, I don't wanna see them out here, 150 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:41,057 'cause I'm afraid I'll come over and, uh, eat one. 151 00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:44,894 -Wow. -I know. I got a problem, I... 152 00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:48,773 All right, anyhow, take them in. Thank you very much. I'll see you later. 153 00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,264 [cell phone ringing] 154 00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:30,106 Handsome. 155 00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:32,984 Yeah. 156 00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,529 All right, pick me up. [sighs] 157 00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:43,911 [sighing] 158 00:11:46,498 --> 00:11:49,751 I gotta go. I gotta go. 159 00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:54,213 I'll see you later. Make me get up. 160 00:11:55,757 --> 00:11:57,259 -You know what I watched the other night? -[Fleur] Huh? 161 00:11:57,342 --> 00:12:01,930 Best movie I've ever seen. I don't know if you saw it. San Andreas. 162 00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:03,473 I love San Andreas. You fuckin' kidding me? 163 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,393 Oh, my God. The Rock? Perfection. 164 00:12:06,476 --> 00:12:09,562 The absurdity? Best absurdity I've ever seen. 165 00:12:09,646 --> 00:12:11,689 Maybe one of the best movies... Easily the best... 166 00:12:11,773 --> 00:12:15,234 What won the Oscar in 2015 that was better than San Andreas? 167 00:12:15,318 --> 00:12:18,655 Best movie ever. And all the time he spent in a boat. 168 00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:21,533 He's in a boat, but he's a helicopter pilot. I loved it. 169 00:12:21,616 --> 00:12:23,200 -I loved it. -I loved it. 170 00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:27,414 What would you do if you had a partner who didn't like how loud you talk? 171 00:12:27,497 --> 00:12:29,291 I don't talk loud. You talk loud. 172 00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:32,460 I don't know who talks louder between us, you or I. 173 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:34,045 -We both talk very loud... -[chuckling] 174 00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:37,382 ...and I don't know which one is the louder talker. 175 00:12:41,303 --> 00:12:43,220 [indistinct chatter] 176 00:12:43,305 --> 00:12:44,597 Good morning, everybody. 177 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:47,266 -Everybody's looking sharp. -What do we got goin' here? 178 00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:48,476 [Fleur sighs] 179 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,522 -Holy shit. -What the fuck is this? 180 00:12:53,315 --> 00:12:55,317 [indistinct radio chatter] 181 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,947 [Handsome] I can't believe it. No way. 182 00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:04,659 Fleur... I think I know this girl. 183 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,202 -You do? -Yeah. 184 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,079 That's my neighbor's sitter. 185 00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,040 I tried giving her cookies yesterday. 186 00:13:11,541 --> 00:13:14,586 -What do you mean, "tried"? -I tried. She wouldn't take them. 187 00:13:14,669 --> 00:13:17,964 She's a very cautious young lady. She wouldn't even open the door. 188 00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:20,675 -She knows the person who did this. -Absolutely. 189 00:13:21,718 --> 00:13:24,012 All right, has anyone else noticed this? 190 00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:28,725 But it looks like her body's put into the shape of the Star of David. 191 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,560 -Oh, man. -[Dino] Jesus. 192 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,646 Jesus. 193 00:13:35,732 --> 00:13:36,899 Jesus. 194 00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,068 Sir, can I quit the force forever, please? 195 00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:41,904 -You wanna quit the force? -Yeah. 196 00:13:41,988 --> 00:13:42,989 Why? 197 00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:44,491 'Cause we're all sitting here casually, 198 00:13:44,574 --> 00:13:47,535 talking about this chopped up woman in this yard, and it's disgusting. 199 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:53,416 We're not casually talking about the lady. We're trying to figure out who did this. 200 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:56,085 -Sir, I have a theory. -You do? What do you got? 201 00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:57,504 Suicide. 202 00:13:58,505 --> 00:13:59,839 -That's it? -That's it. 203 00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:04,469 -I deduce that that's stupid. -Hey, easy. We're all trying here. 204 00:14:04,552 --> 00:14:06,388 Sorry, Detective Burt Jerpis, sir. 205 00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:08,473 I know, Jerpis. Go ahead. What do you got? 206 00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,266 This is a drive-by, plain and simple. 207 00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,935 -How do you get that? -[Jerpis] I'll show you, sir. 208 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:17,482 Our victim was out for a walk. A leisurely, late night walk. 209 00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:19,400 Along comes our perp, 210 00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:21,569 driving a late '90s Honda Accord, purple... 211 00:14:21,653 --> 00:14:22,945 That's my gut feeling. 212 00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:25,532 Then this punk... [chuckles] and that's what he is, 213 00:14:25,615 --> 00:14:28,743 takes out a gun, shoots our victim. What's on the gun? 214 00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:32,830 A silencer. Why is there a silencer? To keep things quiet. 215 00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:35,708 Then, to cover his tracks... 216 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:41,088 he chops the body up into these pieces 217 00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:43,508 and arranges them into this religious symbol. 218 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:47,387 -Case closed. -[Handsome] No, not case closed. 219 00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:50,556 We don't have a bullet wound, and we don't have a killer. 220 00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:52,892 Oh... 221 00:14:53,810 --> 00:14:54,852 [exhales sharply] 222 00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:59,691 -That's why you're the boss. -All right, who's the king of the castle? 223 00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:01,984 The house belongs to Talbert Bacorn. 224 00:15:02,068 --> 00:15:04,904 -The actor? -Yeah, yeah. I'd bend him over. [sniffles] 225 00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:06,989 Uh, and then what? 226 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:10,159 What do you mean? I'd just bend him over. Eat a little popcorn out his ass. 227 00:15:10,242 --> 00:15:12,412 -Okay, I'll do the interview with Bacorn. -Mmm-hmm. 228 00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:16,248 -Okay. What about me? -You take care of that. 229 00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,374 Ah. 230 00:15:17,459 --> 00:15:20,753 Guys, on the right is the home of Talbert Bacorn, 231 00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:22,755 the star of Rainbow Squad. 232 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,549 [tourists cheering] 233 00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:26,300 [cameras clicking] 234 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:29,429 -Do what you gotta do. -[snaps fingers] Done. 235 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:33,015 I'm... I'm freaking out! 236 00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:36,603 [Handsome] Of course you're freaking out. There's a crime scene in your front yard. 237 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:40,857 Okay. Do you think someone is... is threatening me? 238 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,358 Do you think they're trying to send me a message? 239 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:43,568 What do you think that message is? 240 00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:47,071 -Do you think PETA is trying to ambush me? -PETA? 241 00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:50,783 [grunts] I wore suede pants at my premiere. 242 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:54,036 [stammers] Well, I don't think that's really their style. 243 00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:57,665 Why don't you just sit down and breathe? 244 00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,001 Do breathing exercises? 245 00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:04,756 No, not formally. Just sit down, kick back, breathe. 246 00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:09,677 [tourists speaking Japanese] 247 00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:14,932 All right, let's go. Keep it moving. There's nothing to see here. 248 00:16:15,016 --> 00:16:18,019 They want to know if that's a decapitated body on Mr. Talbert's lawn. 249 00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:19,479 No. 250 00:16:19,562 --> 00:16:23,399 [in Japanese] She thinks we're stupid because we don't speak English. 251 00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:24,651 Why would she assume we don't speak English? 252 00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:28,530 Because we're a bus full of tourists from Japan who don't speak English. 253 00:16:28,613 --> 00:16:34,285 Is the body arranged carefully in the shape of a Star of David? 254 00:16:34,368 --> 00:16:37,413 [in English] Is the body carefully arranged in the shape of a Star of David? 255 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:39,165 Unequivocally no. 256 00:16:39,248 --> 00:16:40,792 [in Japanese] What's a Star of David? 257 00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:42,502 It's a symbol for Judaism. 258 00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:44,546 [speaking Japanese] 259 00:16:44,629 --> 00:16:46,047 Rabbi? 260 00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:50,677 The Magen David is said to symbolize the shape of King David's shield, 261 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:54,806 but there is really no support for that claim in any early rabbinic literature. 262 00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,098 In my opinion. 263 00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:58,100 [tourists speaking Japanese] 264 00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:03,940 Tell me about last night. What did you see? What happened? 265 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:07,610 You may have saw or heard something that you're not even aware of. 266 00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:12,114 Ah, so true. An actor's senses are so finely attuned. 267 00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:13,324 Like a detective's. 268 00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:14,659 Mmm... 269 00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:16,869 Probably a little better than a detective's, 270 00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:21,582 but a little worse than a blind man whose fingertips are so sensitive, 271 00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,502 he can make words out of bumps. 272 00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:26,588 Back to last night... 273 00:17:27,504 --> 00:17:29,632 -What went on? -Last night, last night... 274 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:33,052 Well... [sighs] I pet sit for my next-door neighbor, 275 00:17:33,135 --> 00:17:35,054 so I went next door and fed the dog. 276 00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:36,806 -You pet sit? -I do. 277 00:17:37,849 --> 00:17:40,184 Are you close with the neighbor? You love dogs? 278 00:17:40,267 --> 00:17:44,063 I seize any opportunity to add to my actor's toolbox. 279 00:17:44,146 --> 00:17:48,943 Should I have the opportunity to play a pet sitter in some future project, 280 00:17:50,152 --> 00:17:51,487 I know how they'll feel. 281 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:54,365 That's a real dedication to your craft. 282 00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:56,951 It's my life. 283 00:17:58,410 --> 00:18:02,373 When you were over there, did you see anybody walkin' around, coming, going? 284 00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:06,377 No, nothing. It was all quiet. Not a creature was stirring on my lawn. 285 00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:10,256 Well, I really don't think the victim would've been stirring. 286 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:15,386 So you come back from your neighbor's. You're home. What next? 287 00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:19,015 Well... [sighs] I got undressed for bed, and I watched my movie! 288 00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:23,770 Yes, it was on cable. [laughs] It's an old movie of mine from 1985. 289 00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:28,440 Patty-Cake. I played Emil, the baker man's illegitimate son. 290 00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:31,193 -I think I remember that one. -Mmm. [inhales sharply] 291 00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:34,238 It's an early work, but underrated. 292 00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:40,536 The scene where I'm crying and chanting, "Patty-cake, patty-cake." 293 00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:43,873 I hold up my little hands for my father to clap them, 294 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,041 and he rejects me. 295 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:48,002 [clicks tongue] Still holds up. [chuckles] 296 00:18:48,085 --> 00:18:51,255 So, you're watching the movie. Did you hear anything? 297 00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:54,591 Mmm... 298 00:18:54,676 --> 00:18:55,677 No. 299 00:18:56,678 --> 00:18:57,762 Okay. 300 00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:04,476 Uh, if you think of anything else, please give me a call. 301 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:06,562 Do not text me. I don't enjoy it. 302 00:19:06,646 --> 00:19:10,149 So you'll send me a special police detail for my protection? 303 00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,859 We're gonna keep an eye on things. Don't worry. 304 00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:15,196 Oh, thank you. I'm used to a lot of attention. 305 00:19:18,449 --> 00:19:21,077 -[indistinct radio chatter] -[sighs heavily] 306 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:26,999 You do know it's the ex-boyfriend, don't you? 307 00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,336 -Lieutenant Kenda. -Detective Handsome. 308 00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:33,422 Do not worry. I've got all the angles covered. 309 00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:35,216 It's always the ex-boyfriend. 310 00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:39,303 It's the old, "If I can't have you, no one will have you." 311 00:19:39,386 --> 00:19:43,515 -You see chopped up bodies a lot? -Not a lot, but I've seen them. 312 00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:45,017 You know what that says? 313 00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:49,480 "To kill you is not enough. I want to punish you." 314 00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:52,066 Very personal. Very close. 315 00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:56,570 -Have you been stretching like I said? -Occasionally. 316 00:19:56,653 --> 00:20:00,700 You need to do it more than occasionally. Limbers you up. 317 00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,285 [clock ticking] 318 00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:10,501 [indistinct radio chatter] 319 00:20:14,797 --> 00:20:16,799 [clock ticking continues] 320 00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:34,025 [knocking on door] 321 00:20:38,195 --> 00:20:39,238 Hey! 322 00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:42,950 Oh, shit. Sorry, I thought you were my sitter. 323 00:20:43,034 --> 00:20:44,243 Yeah, about that... 324 00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:48,080 I'm, uh, Gene Handsome, detective with the LAPD 325 00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:50,541 and, coincidentally, your next door neighbor. 326 00:20:51,375 --> 00:20:54,045 -Oh, hi. Nice to meet you. -Hi. 327 00:20:54,128 --> 00:20:57,214 -Oh, shit. Did Heather get arrested? -Why would you say that? 328 00:20:57,298 --> 00:21:01,177 [sighs] Sticky fingers. Yeah, she's stolen a few of my going-out tops, 329 00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:03,637 but it's really hard to find a good sitter. 330 00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:06,682 Well, I've got some bad news. 331 00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:07,809 [sighs] 332 00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:13,773 This is so brutal. And then to get chopped up like that? 333 00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:16,859 -Yeah. It's tough. -Oh, my God. Poor Heather. 334 00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:21,572 It's terrible. And, uh, what was your relationship with her? 335 00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:24,408 Was she close to you guys? Was she like family? 336 00:21:25,742 --> 00:21:27,286 She... Eh... 337 00:21:27,369 --> 00:21:31,498 She... she was the babysitter. But, you know, nice. 338 00:21:31,582 --> 00:21:32,750 She was fine. 339 00:21:33,209 --> 00:21:35,127 -Oh, hey, honey. -Hi there. 340 00:21:35,211 --> 00:21:39,548 Uh, this is my daughter, Carys. Carys, this is Detective Handsome. 341 00:21:39,631 --> 00:21:42,176 Did you overhear everything that happened? 342 00:21:42,259 --> 00:21:43,302 [Carys] Mmm-hmm. 343 00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:46,263 The angels came and took Miss Heather to hell. 344 00:21:46,848 --> 00:21:48,182 [Nora snickers] 345 00:21:48,265 --> 00:21:49,350 Hmm. 346 00:21:50,392 --> 00:21:52,436 [chuckling] I don't know where she gets that stuff. 347 00:21:53,020 --> 00:21:55,272 -Kids. -Oh, shit! 348 00:21:55,356 --> 00:21:57,984 I'm so late for work and I'm out of sick days. 349 00:21:58,067 --> 00:22:01,028 -What time do you work till? -One o'clock. Fridays are my half-day. 350 00:22:01,863 --> 00:22:02,864 I'll watch her. 351 00:22:02,947 --> 00:22:04,824 -Wait, are you serious? -I'm totally serious. 352 00:22:04,907 --> 00:22:07,493 I've got some questions to ask you. 353 00:22:07,576 --> 00:22:09,871 Uh, we can get back to that as soon as you come back. 354 00:22:09,954 --> 00:22:11,788 -Great. Thank you so much. -Yeah. Sure. 355 00:22:11,873 --> 00:22:13,665 -That's great. You're fine. -Yeah. Yeah. 356 00:22:13,749 --> 00:22:19,255 -[Carys sighs] -You're great. Yeah. Okay. Good? Okay. 357 00:22:23,092 --> 00:22:24,676 [Handsome] How about that? 358 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:29,223 Who wouldn't want a real detective as their babysitter? 359 00:22:29,306 --> 00:22:30,474 [scoffs] 360 00:22:33,895 --> 00:22:36,522 Guess you. You're the one who doesn't. 361 00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:38,857 [groans] 362 00:22:38,941 --> 00:22:41,068 I'm really good at dancing. 363 00:22:41,152 --> 00:22:43,279 You're gonna love the show that I have planned for you. 364 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:47,199 Very exciting. I love the arts. I'm a patron. 365 00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:48,868 Of the arts. 366 00:22:49,868 --> 00:22:52,621 -Take a seat on the couch. -All right. 367 00:22:55,082 --> 00:22:56,583 [Liz Phair's "Why Can't I?" playing] 368 00:23:07,177 --> 00:23:09,972 d Get a load of me Get a load of you d 369 00:23:10,055 --> 00:23:13,392 d Walking down the street And I hardly know you d 370 00:23:14,310 --> 00:23:15,394 [sniffles] 371 00:23:15,477 --> 00:23:18,606 d It's just like we were meant to be d 372 00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:21,984 d Holding hands with you When we're out at night d 373 00:23:22,067 --> 00:23:25,362 d Got a girlfriend You say it isn't right d 374 00:23:25,446 --> 00:23:26,822 d It isn't right d 375 00:23:26,906 --> 00:23:28,657 d And I've got someone... d 376 00:23:28,740 --> 00:23:32,411 -When does it start? -[Carys] This is the pre-entertainment. 377 00:23:32,494 --> 00:23:35,664 It's important to set a tone for the audience. 378 00:23:35,747 --> 00:23:39,126 And for the record, you can't be talking to me. 379 00:23:40,085 --> 00:23:42,963 d Whenever I think about you d 380 00:23:43,047 --> 00:23:47,551 d Why can't I speak Whenever I talk about-- d 381 00:23:47,635 --> 00:23:48,636 [music stops] 382 00:24:00,106 --> 00:24:01,107 Hi. 383 00:24:01,983 --> 00:24:04,110 -How's Carys? -A delight. 384 00:24:05,111 --> 00:24:07,071 -Really? -She's a great kid. Yes. 385 00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:10,199 -Oh, good. Great. -Yeah. 386 00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:14,996 -Is, uh, now a good time? -Yeah. Sure. Uh-huh. 387 00:24:15,079 --> 00:24:18,582 -All right. How was your day? -Ugh, it was disgusting. 388 00:24:18,665 --> 00:24:20,334 [sighs] I hate teeth. 389 00:24:20,417 --> 00:24:23,004 I am so sick of looking into people's mouths. 390 00:24:23,087 --> 00:24:24,796 I have this recurring nightmare where 391 00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:28,342 instead of all of my teeth falling out, I get more of them. 392 00:24:28,425 --> 00:24:30,761 Just, like, more and more and more. 393 00:24:30,844 --> 00:24:34,015 I get teeth fingernails and teeth toenails. 394 00:24:34,098 --> 00:24:36,975 My belly button even sprouts a tooth. It's disgusting. 395 00:24:37,059 --> 00:24:39,603 Have you thought of getting out of the dental industry? 396 00:24:39,687 --> 00:24:43,357 [sighs] Yeah. Teeth are vile. 397 00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:46,860 You know, both of our jobs, we see the worst of people. 398 00:24:47,778 --> 00:24:49,071 That's so true. 399 00:24:49,155 --> 00:24:51,948 -Heather, your babysitter. -Yeah. [sighs] 400 00:24:52,033 --> 00:24:54,618 Did she have any romantic interests? 401 00:24:54,701 --> 00:24:58,372 Oh... Um, not that I'm aware of. 402 00:24:58,455 --> 00:25:03,752 You know, she did mention an ex-boyfriend, but he's back east and he's married now. 403 00:25:03,836 --> 00:25:08,298 -I didn't get the sense that they talk. -Okay, do you have any info on him? 404 00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:11,593 Uh, no, just that he's married. 405 00:25:11,677 --> 00:25:13,179 -That's it. -Okay. 406 00:25:13,262 --> 00:25:16,140 Um, was anybody giving her any trouble? 407 00:25:16,223 --> 00:25:20,352 Did she, um, uh, have any issues she was dealing with? 408 00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:27,068 Well, I... I mentioned the, like, klepto shenanigans. 409 00:25:27,151 --> 00:25:28,569 -Mmm-hmm. -Um... 410 00:25:28,652 --> 00:25:31,197 Well, I know she had a hard time paying bills, 411 00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:33,115 -but that's pretty standard, right? -Mmm-hmm. 412 00:25:33,199 --> 00:25:35,117 I mean... [scoffs] so do I. 413 00:25:35,201 --> 00:25:37,035 You know, the rent on this place is ridiculous, 414 00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,538 but we have to have a yard, so... 415 00:25:41,165 --> 00:25:46,295 You know what? She did actually tell me that sometimes when she would go out, 416 00:25:46,378 --> 00:25:51,217 she would get into these, like, bar fights with other girls when she got drunk. 417 00:25:51,300 --> 00:25:52,301 About what? 418 00:25:52,384 --> 00:25:56,764 Well, one time, I know it was because she made fun of a girl's highlights. 419 00:25:57,556 --> 00:26:03,145 Apparently, Heather told her she looked like a bale of hay from Temecula. 420 00:26:03,812 --> 00:26:07,233 -That's a very specific insult. -That is why it stuck with me. 421 00:26:07,316 --> 00:26:09,610 Mmm. Did she live alone? 422 00:26:10,152 --> 00:26:13,030 Oh, no, there's a roommate, Amanda. Here, give me your pad. 423 00:26:14,448 --> 00:26:19,370 Uh, Amanda would probably know more of, like, the personal crap about Heather. 424 00:26:19,453 --> 00:26:22,956 Most of the time, we just talked about what she gave Carys for dinner. 425 00:26:24,208 --> 00:26:27,628 -That's the address. -You don't dot your I's. 426 00:26:28,962 --> 00:26:30,005 Who needs 'em? 427 00:26:31,340 --> 00:26:34,092 -Heather lived here in the living room? -Yeah. 428 00:26:34,176 --> 00:26:35,719 This is all of her shit. 429 00:26:35,802 --> 00:26:36,845 [siren wailing] 430 00:26:36,928 --> 00:26:39,931 Um, listen, I have a guy from Tinder jogging over, 431 00:26:40,015 --> 00:26:41,808 so is there any way you could come back later? 432 00:26:42,684 --> 00:26:43,685 Forgive me, 433 00:26:43,769 --> 00:26:47,481 but for someone whose roommate just died, you don't seem very upset. 434 00:26:47,564 --> 00:26:49,107 Oh, no, I'm really sad. 435 00:26:49,191 --> 00:26:50,901 But also, I want this place to just go back 436 00:26:50,984 --> 00:26:55,197 to being a normal one-bedroom, because this is a really awkward setup. 437 00:26:55,281 --> 00:26:56,907 You two didn't get along? 438 00:26:56,990 --> 00:26:59,576 No, I mean, she was fine. Like, if you had your period 439 00:26:59,660 --> 00:27:04,623 and were lying down and complaining... But, like, she could also be really rude. 440 00:27:04,706 --> 00:27:06,708 What, like making fun of your highlights? 441 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,878 I haven't had highlights since 2014, so... 442 00:27:09,961 --> 00:27:11,755 I'm not keeping track. It's all good. 443 00:27:11,838 --> 00:27:14,883 -What is this used for? -I don't know. 444 00:27:14,966 --> 00:27:19,305 Uh... [groans] She was actually, like, a very problematic roommate. 445 00:27:19,388 --> 00:27:21,807 Like, I have my childhood gymnastics trophies. 446 00:27:21,890 --> 00:27:24,393 I keep them on my headboard. She thought that was dumb. 447 00:27:24,476 --> 00:27:27,604 So then when I went to the bathroom, she called me Mary Lou Rectum. 448 00:27:27,688 --> 00:27:31,525 Oh, and then one time, she told me to tell my tits they could come out 449 00:27:31,608 --> 00:27:34,027 now that my gymnastics career was over. 450 00:27:34,820 --> 00:27:37,573 -She date anybody? -Heather likes old dudes. 451 00:27:38,199 --> 00:27:41,577 There was one guy she was meeting up with. I think he was in his forties. 452 00:27:41,660 --> 00:27:45,289 Old dude. [stutters] Yeah, what do you know about him? 453 00:27:45,372 --> 00:27:48,334 Nothing. Uh, he didn't stay over. He didn't spend the night. 454 00:27:48,417 --> 00:27:50,711 I do not think he wanted to be seen in public with her. 455 00:27:50,794 --> 00:27:53,714 -Why's that? -Well, that's usually really good sex. 456 00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:57,009 When someone hates themself for stooping to fuck you, you know? 457 00:27:57,593 --> 00:28:00,179 No, uh, uh, I don't. I have no idea. 458 00:28:00,554 --> 00:28:04,891 -Also he bought her a lot of finery. -Finery? [stutters] What's finery? 459 00:28:04,975 --> 00:28:07,186 You know, luxury clothing for a modern woman. 460 00:28:08,103 --> 00:28:09,021 Oh. 461 00:28:09,730 --> 00:28:13,317 "Silky Lamb." Is that like a lotion version of finery? 462 00:28:13,567 --> 00:28:14,651 No, I just told you. 463 00:28:14,735 --> 00:28:17,571 Finery is luxury clothing for a modern woman. 464 00:28:17,654 --> 00:28:20,073 Listen, my booty call's about to be here any second, 465 00:28:20,156 --> 00:28:23,577 and he's my favorite match on Tinder, so I can't have you fucking this up. 466 00:28:23,660 --> 00:28:28,540 -Okay, thank you for being so patient. -You're welcome. Goodbye! 467 00:28:29,791 --> 00:28:34,170 Lester! Welcome back, my friend. How was your vacation? 468 00:28:34,255 --> 00:28:38,759 Had a mind to stay in Tahiti longer, but all these bodies thought different. 469 00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:41,177 Pretty gruesome. What do you think? 470 00:28:41,262 --> 00:28:45,015 Well, something very interesting's going on. Come on over here. 471 00:28:47,351 --> 00:28:50,396 -You see this sheen coming off her skin? -I do. 472 00:28:50,479 --> 00:28:53,148 Can you discern that this woman is unusually greasy? 473 00:28:53,607 --> 00:28:57,110 -She is. -She is very well creamed. 474 00:28:57,193 --> 00:29:01,114 -This here's a very well-creamed body. -She seems unusually greasy. 475 00:29:01,197 --> 00:29:03,074 -You don't see this often. -That makes sense. 476 00:29:03,158 --> 00:29:07,579 I was just at her apartment. She had an extremely nice jar of lotion. 477 00:29:07,663 --> 00:29:09,873 Are you sure that jar you saw said "lotion"? 478 00:29:09,956 --> 00:29:11,958 When I see the word "lotion," I don't forget. 479 00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:15,629 No, no, no, no, no. This here's not lotion. This here's cream. 480 00:29:15,712 --> 00:29:18,089 -Well, what's the difference? -You don't know? 481 00:29:18,173 --> 00:29:20,926 -I don't know. -Well, lotion's water-based. 482 00:29:21,009 --> 00:29:25,472 You apply it liberally all over your body. But cream is oil-based. 483 00:29:25,556 --> 00:29:28,517 You got to be careful with cream. Lil' dab'll do ya. 484 00:29:30,226 --> 00:29:32,354 Um, I'm sorry, [stutters] I didn't get that. 485 00:29:32,438 --> 00:29:33,605 Can you repeat that for me? 486 00:29:33,689 --> 00:29:35,399 Okay, listen carefully. 487 00:29:35,482 --> 00:29:38,694 Lotion is water-based. Use as much of that as you want. 488 00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:40,612 Don't matter. It's water-based. 489 00:29:40,696 --> 00:29:44,616 But cream, that's oil-based. You hear me? Oil-based. 490 00:29:44,700 --> 00:29:48,078 -Lil' dab'll do ya. -Okay, so lotion, I go crazy. 491 00:29:48,161 --> 00:29:49,913 -Yeah. -Do what I want. All over. 492 00:29:49,996 --> 00:29:53,542 -Now what's the story with cream again? -Lil' dab'll do ya. 493 00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:55,586 Thank you. Thank you. 494 00:29:55,669 --> 00:29:59,255 Anyway, she was killed via blunt force to the head. 495 00:29:59,340 --> 00:30:01,967 You see this globe-shaped dent here on her skull? 496 00:30:02,050 --> 00:30:05,637 -Yeah. -Well, weapon was about yea big. 497 00:30:06,262 --> 00:30:10,141 -Well, what about the dismemberment? -Well, that was all postmortem. 498 00:30:10,225 --> 00:30:15,439 But what's most notable about the job is, whoever did it was very, very sloppy. 499 00:30:15,522 --> 00:30:19,025 Just jabbing here and there till the limb come off. 500 00:30:19,109 --> 00:30:21,695 Jabbing. Lil' jab'll do ya. 501 00:30:22,446 --> 00:30:25,657 -Get the fuck on out of here. -Okay. [chuckling] 502 00:30:25,741 --> 00:30:27,075 [indistinct chatter] 503 00:30:28,410 --> 00:30:29,620 Cell phone records, bam. 504 00:30:29,703 --> 00:30:32,205 Okay, so, uh, most of these calls are to be expected, right? 505 00:30:32,288 --> 00:30:34,666 We got the job, roommate, parents, pot dealer, pussy waxer. 506 00:30:34,750 --> 00:30:36,793 But then there's a number that repeats. 507 00:30:36,877 --> 00:30:39,380 Traces to an office landline registered to an executive. 508 00:30:39,463 --> 00:30:42,298 Lloyd Vanderwheel. He's in fireworks. 509 00:30:44,009 --> 00:30:46,094 -Well-- -[Tucker] Handsome! 510 00:30:46,177 --> 00:30:49,014 -Oh, shit. [sniffles] -We need to talk now! 511 00:30:49,097 --> 00:30:50,349 [Fleur] Mmm. 512 00:30:51,725 --> 00:30:52,893 [clears throat] 513 00:30:57,731 --> 00:31:01,192 -Meet you in the car? -Yeah. See you there. 514 00:31:03,404 --> 00:31:07,741 [sighs] So, how'd you like the cookies? 515 00:31:08,909 --> 00:31:11,578 Um... [stutters] They were great. Amazing. 516 00:31:11,661 --> 00:31:13,246 -Ah, really? -Yeah. 517 00:31:14,205 --> 00:31:17,376 Because truth be told, they weren't leftovers. 518 00:31:17,459 --> 00:31:21,463 I made that batch just for you. 519 00:31:23,339 --> 00:31:25,091 [chuckles] 520 00:31:25,175 --> 00:31:31,264 I just want you to know that I'm here. At the station. At your house. 521 00:31:31,347 --> 00:31:34,560 Not my house. I have a family visiting from Caracas. They're very nice. 522 00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:39,940 I just don't know how they feel about the sound of gentle lovemaking. 523 00:31:40,023 --> 00:31:44,570 Or raunchy lovemaking. Whatever. Just sounds in general. 524 00:31:44,653 --> 00:31:46,530 Why did I come here to see you? That's right. 525 00:31:46,613 --> 00:31:51,159 The retirement papers. Sign 'em, Handsome. You're not fooling anybody. 526 00:31:51,242 --> 00:31:54,245 And by the way, my tubes are tied. 527 00:32:00,961 --> 00:32:02,295 You gotta fix this door. 528 00:32:03,338 --> 00:32:05,591 -Yeah, I will. -[door creaks] 529 00:32:06,508 --> 00:32:07,509 [Handsome groans] 530 00:32:17,478 --> 00:32:20,564 It's a booming, sparkling morning. Can I help you? 531 00:32:20,647 --> 00:32:24,526 Yes. Detectives Handsome and Scozzari of the LAPD. 532 00:32:24,610 --> 00:32:27,237 Uh, we're here to see one Mr. Lloyd Vanderwheel. 533 00:32:27,320 --> 00:32:30,198 -One moment, please. Mr. Vander... -[phone beeps] 534 00:32:30,281 --> 00:32:32,618 Oh, shoot. My finger slipped. [chuckles] 535 00:32:32,701 --> 00:32:35,370 -Mr. Vander... Oh, shoot. -[Lloyd] Uh, yes, Sky. What's going on? 536 00:32:35,454 --> 00:32:37,956 I'm sorry. [stuttering] I got excited 537 00:32:38,039 --> 00:32:41,417 and I pushed the button too soon, Mr. Vanderwheel. [chuckles nervously] 538 00:32:41,502 --> 00:32:45,756 -Sky, don't push the button. -Oh, God! Go ahead. No, I... 539 00:32:45,839 --> 00:32:47,466 Sky? Sky? 540 00:32:47,549 --> 00:32:50,176 Hey, uh, forget about the intercom. 541 00:32:52,262 --> 00:32:54,931 -[phone beeps] -These detectives are here to see you. 542 00:32:55,849 --> 00:32:58,309 So, uh, what's this all about? 543 00:32:58,393 --> 00:33:00,854 -[Handsome] Do the thing. -Yeah. [clears throat] 544 00:33:01,772 --> 00:33:02,939 [inhales deeply] 545 00:33:04,149 --> 00:33:05,651 -Mmm-hmm. -[shutter clicks] 546 00:33:06,359 --> 00:33:07,360 [Lloyd] What... 547 00:33:07,443 --> 00:33:08,987 [stammers] What was that for? 548 00:33:09,070 --> 00:33:11,907 Oh. Oh, this? Don't worry about it. 549 00:33:11,990 --> 00:33:13,742 -You look great in this shot. -[cell phone chimes] 550 00:33:13,825 --> 00:33:17,662 Ah, then again, bet you've never taken a shitty photo in your life, huh? 551 00:33:17,954 --> 00:33:19,247 -Is this about... -[cell phone chimes] 552 00:33:19,330 --> 00:33:21,833 ...the Lancaster Jazz and Heritage Festival? 553 00:33:21,917 --> 00:33:23,627 Did we go too big? Uh... 554 00:33:24,127 --> 00:33:27,088 I just got caught up with, uh... 555 00:33:27,673 --> 00:33:30,258 So clearly, you're familiar with Heather Dromgoole. 556 00:33:31,635 --> 00:33:33,803 -Heather? -You were seeing her romantically? 557 00:33:34,387 --> 00:33:39,392 No. No, no, no, no, no. She's... she's an old family friend from back east. 558 00:33:40,644 --> 00:33:42,812 The kid of my parents' friends. 559 00:33:43,730 --> 00:33:48,234 Uh, she moved out here recently and, um, I was helping her get set up. 560 00:33:48,318 --> 00:33:49,528 Oh. 561 00:33:50,028 --> 00:33:51,237 So you guys aren't a thing? 562 00:33:52,238 --> 00:33:54,324 -No, I'm... I'm single. -[Fleur] Oh. 563 00:33:55,325 --> 00:33:58,537 -So you're single? -Yeah. I'm single. 564 00:33:58,620 --> 00:34:00,288 -He's single. -I was asking! 565 00:34:00,371 --> 00:34:02,999 Okay, she'd be calling you regularly for? 566 00:34:03,083 --> 00:34:06,461 Just to get advice. Check in. 567 00:34:07,379 --> 00:34:10,674 She got real lonely in LA, as one does. 568 00:34:12,008 --> 00:34:14,720 I think she looked to me like a bit of a father figure. 569 00:34:14,803 --> 00:34:18,682 -Oh, yeah, Daddy? -Yeah. That's right. 570 00:34:18,765 --> 00:34:20,183 [chuckles] 571 00:34:20,266 --> 00:34:23,604 So why you asking all these questions about Heather? Did she get arrested? 572 00:34:23,687 --> 00:34:25,021 Why would you say that? 573 00:34:25,105 --> 00:34:27,440 Uh, maybe blackmail. 574 00:34:28,399 --> 00:34:31,653 I know she had a... a bit of a blackmail incident 575 00:34:31,737 --> 00:34:33,279 with her high school English teacher. 576 00:34:33,363 --> 00:34:36,700 You know, I had a, uh, black male incident 577 00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:41,121 with my sexy-ass black high school English teacher, too. 578 00:34:42,747 --> 00:34:46,042 Heather was the victim of a murder on Thursday night. 579 00:34:46,668 --> 00:34:48,587 Oh, my God! Uh... 580 00:34:49,545 --> 00:34:51,089 I'm sorry. 581 00:34:51,172 --> 00:34:55,677 What? [stuttering] I... This... I can't believe this. Wow. 582 00:34:56,469 --> 00:34:57,721 I mean... 583 00:34:58,930 --> 00:35:02,768 I can't believe this, but I can believe this. 584 00:35:02,851 --> 00:35:04,269 -Excuse me? -Huh? 585 00:35:04,352 --> 00:35:08,440 You know, some people, you can't imagine anyone wanting to murder. 586 00:35:09,357 --> 00:35:10,358 But Heather? 587 00:35:13,945 --> 00:35:14,946 You know? 588 00:35:16,489 --> 00:35:18,325 But still, it's devastating. 589 00:35:19,159 --> 00:35:21,536 Jesus. God. Jesus. 590 00:35:21,620 --> 00:35:24,497 Any ideas of who would be upset with her? 591 00:35:25,206 --> 00:35:28,126 Uh, no. No one comes to mind. 592 00:35:28,918 --> 00:35:30,253 -Wow. -[intercom beeps] 593 00:35:30,336 --> 00:35:31,630 -[Sky] Mr. Vander... -[intercom key clacking] 594 00:35:31,713 --> 00:35:33,089 Oh. 595 00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:36,885 I'm... I'm sorry. My one o'clock is here. 596 00:35:36,968 --> 00:35:39,638 Um, but, hey, let me give you my card. 597 00:35:39,721 --> 00:35:45,143 And, uh, you guys can give me a call if you have any, uh, more questions. 598 00:35:45,226 --> 00:35:48,813 -Who's that? -Oh, that's, uh... It's my kid, Carys. 599 00:35:49,648 --> 00:35:52,984 She's the biggest sweetheart. Anyway, here. 600 00:35:53,484 --> 00:35:57,948 Yeah, just give me a call, uh, if you have any names you wanna run by me 601 00:35:58,031 --> 00:36:03,453 and I'll help however I can. I... aim to please. 602 00:36:06,289 --> 00:36:08,166 Oh, give me a fuckin' break. 603 00:36:08,249 --> 00:36:10,626 I'm not buying the whole father-figure thing. 604 00:36:10,711 --> 00:36:14,464 -Thank you very much. -Sure. Have an explosive day. 605 00:36:14,547 --> 00:36:17,175 I mean, who calls their fake dad that much? 606 00:36:17,258 --> 00:36:19,052 [Fleur] Yeah, yeah, it's very suspicious. 607 00:36:19,135 --> 00:36:20,553 You know, I just, uh... 608 00:36:20,636 --> 00:36:23,807 [stammering] I realized I gotta go to the bathroom, like, bad. 609 00:36:24,474 --> 00:36:26,559 -It's okay, I'll wait. -No, you know what? [stammers] 610 00:36:26,642 --> 00:36:28,687 Could take a while, so why don't you just go ahead, 611 00:36:28,770 --> 00:36:30,731 and, uh, I'll take a cab back to the station. 612 00:36:30,814 --> 00:36:32,733 That's okay. It's gonna be that long of a trip? 613 00:36:33,859 --> 00:36:35,068 [exhales sharply] 614 00:36:35,151 --> 00:36:36,611 Yeah, uh... [sniffles] 615 00:36:36,695 --> 00:36:40,741 -Okay, I'll just sit and meditate. -Nah. Nah, nah, nah. You know, you go on. 616 00:36:40,824 --> 00:36:42,117 I mean, like the lady said, 617 00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:43,952 [chuckles] it's gonna be an explosive day, right? 618 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:47,663 -Interesting. -What? What? 619 00:36:48,498 --> 00:36:49,499 [knocking on door] 620 00:36:50,625 --> 00:36:51,918 [door opens] 621 00:36:52,002 --> 00:36:55,213 -Hi there. -Why are you talking to me? 622 00:36:55,296 --> 00:36:58,925 Ooh, the detective. Just busy detecting, aren't you? 623 00:36:59,425 --> 00:37:01,845 I'm Charles, Carys' friend. 624 00:37:01,928 --> 00:37:04,139 We met while making fun of the mailman's calves. 625 00:37:04,639 --> 00:37:06,391 Hi, Charles, nice to meet you. 626 00:37:06,474 --> 00:37:10,686 Carys, could you tell your mother that Detective Handsome's here to see her? 627 00:37:10,771 --> 00:37:15,608 Oh, we're off to check out a four-bed, three-bath open house. So... [chuckles] 628 00:37:16,526 --> 00:37:18,236 [Nora] Oh, hi, Gene. Come on in. 629 00:37:18,987 --> 00:37:21,448 Hi, um, I was driving home from work, 630 00:37:21,531 --> 00:37:23,742 and I thought of something I wanted to ask you. 631 00:37:24,784 --> 00:37:28,204 -Are you hungry? Do you want some pasta? -No, I'm good. I'm good. 632 00:37:29,039 --> 00:37:31,917 Were you aware that your ex-husband knew Heather? 633 00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:37,881 -What? Lloyd was fucking Heather? -Well, he says that he wasn't. 634 00:37:37,964 --> 00:37:40,675 Oh! [grunts] You know what? I bet he got off on the fact 635 00:37:40,759 --> 00:37:43,804 -that he was fucking my babysitter. -So you definitely didn't know? 636 00:37:43,887 --> 00:37:46,056 He would fuck my gardener just to rattle me, 637 00:37:46,139 --> 00:37:48,141 'cause that's just the kind of guy that he is. 638 00:37:48,224 --> 00:37:49,267 [door opens] 639 00:37:49,350 --> 00:37:51,853 -[Devon] Knock, knock. -Oh, hey, neighbor. 640 00:37:51,937 --> 00:37:53,604 [chuckles] Hey. 641 00:37:53,688 --> 00:37:59,360 [sighs] Aroma of the forest floor. Full-bodied. Jammy finish. 642 00:37:59,444 --> 00:38:02,488 -That's what's in store for you tonight. -Wow, thank you. 643 00:38:02,572 --> 00:38:05,533 -"Wow" is right. -You two know each other? Yeah? 644 00:38:06,201 --> 00:38:08,536 -Devon. -Uh... [chuckles] 645 00:38:08,619 --> 00:38:11,998 Yeah, we do. Handsome here has broken up quite a few of my house parties. 646 00:38:12,082 --> 00:38:15,668 I affectionately like to call him Detective Buzzkill. [chuckling] 647 00:38:15,751 --> 00:38:18,880 I wouldn't call four strippers playing with your dreidel collection 648 00:38:18,964 --> 00:38:20,006 a house party. 649 00:38:22,050 --> 00:38:27,597 Sounds fun. Devon and I met when I was watering the flowers in this very window. 650 00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:31,977 Mmm-hmm. And I was staring into her house over the fence. 651 00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:34,312 -And then he waved at me. -Oh... 652 00:38:34,395 --> 00:38:35,605 -[Devon] I'm a waver. -[Nora] Mmm-hmm. 653 00:38:35,688 --> 00:38:38,399 Then we locked eyes and there's a moment where we were like, 654 00:38:38,483 --> 00:38:42,111 "We should probably have dinner together." And we're about to do that. 655 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:45,406 Cool, cool. 656 00:38:46,574 --> 00:38:48,284 [accordion playing] 657 00:38:54,249 --> 00:38:55,750 [Esta moaning] 658 00:38:56,667 --> 00:38:58,169 [Durante] Oh, Esta. 659 00:39:00,171 --> 00:39:03,716 Put that accordion on my abs. 660 00:39:04,634 --> 00:39:06,677 [Durante and Esta moaning and grunting] 661 00:39:18,899 --> 00:39:22,568 And, uh... a, uh, double cheeseburger. 662 00:39:22,652 --> 00:39:24,905 Okay, and would you like to make that a meal? 663 00:39:24,988 --> 00:39:27,866 You know what? Give me the single cheeseburger on its own 664 00:39:27,949 --> 00:39:30,076 and make the double cheeseburger a meal. Yes. 665 00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,828 Okay, and what beverage would you like with your meal? 666 00:39:34,789 --> 00:39:35,915 You know what? Fuck it. 667 00:39:35,999 --> 00:39:37,667 -Chocolate milkshake. -[man] Okay. 668 00:39:41,337 --> 00:39:42,380 [sighs] 669 00:39:42,463 --> 00:39:47,468 I'm sorry, I know you guys are church kids. Excuse the salty talk. 670 00:39:47,552 --> 00:39:49,595 It's okay. Satan gets all of us sometimes. 671 00:39:49,679 --> 00:39:54,100 Yeah. You know, tonight's the last night I'm gonna eat this crap. 672 00:39:54,184 --> 00:39:58,063 I mean, no offense to Norm's Burger. I don't mean that your food's crap. 673 00:39:58,146 --> 00:40:00,481 It's just... It's not good for a guy like me. 674 00:40:01,191 --> 00:40:03,568 Yep, this is it. Gonna start fresh tomorrow. 675 00:40:03,651 --> 00:40:05,528 I think that's great. You can be your best self. 676 00:40:05,611 --> 00:40:07,405 I can be my best self! 677 00:40:07,488 --> 00:40:08,698 -Very kind of you. -Yeah. 678 00:40:14,955 --> 00:40:17,290 Weren't you just out back there with the other guy? 679 00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:19,459 Oh, the headset's broken, so... 680 00:40:19,542 --> 00:40:23,213 Yeah. Sort of like old-fashioned service. 681 00:40:23,296 --> 00:40:25,590 -Uh, yeah, a bit like that. -Okay. 682 00:40:25,673 --> 00:40:27,217 Uh, $9.57's your total. 683 00:40:27,300 --> 00:40:28,593 I was ready. 684 00:40:29,928 --> 00:40:33,431 Thirty-two, please. Number 32, your order is ready. 685 00:41:01,626 --> 00:41:05,171 Okay, so this is her debit. I flagged some interesting purchases. 686 00:41:05,255 --> 00:41:08,674 Uh, okay, you tell me, who the fuck spends 900 bucks in one pop at Hallmark? 687 00:41:08,758 --> 00:41:10,176 Hey? Come on. 688 00:41:10,260 --> 00:41:11,886 I mean, otherwise, it seems kosher. 689 00:41:11,970 --> 00:41:15,390 Uh, this one is her Victoria's Secret Angel Card. 690 00:41:15,473 --> 00:41:19,602 I mean, the girl could not resist a "buy five panties, get the sixth free" event. 691 00:41:19,685 --> 00:41:21,687 And, uh, here's her PayPal. 692 00:41:22,981 --> 00:41:26,401 I found something which I think will intrigue you. 693 00:41:26,484 --> 00:41:28,653 Okay? What's that? 694 00:41:29,988 --> 00:41:33,074 -Did you sign off on this? -Yeah. Why? 695 00:41:37,620 --> 00:41:38,829 What the fuck? 696 00:41:38,913 --> 00:41:42,125 -When did she start wearing ties to work? -I don't know. Oh! 697 00:41:42,875 --> 00:41:47,797 She's getting regular deposits from MrFFF@aol.com. 698 00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,176 Fireworks, Fireworks, Fireworks, huh? 699 00:41:51,259 --> 00:41:55,722 He's putting $500 a week into her account. What's he paying her for? 700 00:41:56,097 --> 00:41:58,433 I guess it must be out of the goodness of his heart, right? 701 00:42:00,226 --> 00:42:02,937 Where's the, uh, cell phone records? 702 00:42:03,021 --> 00:42:07,983 And they're underneath, uh, this. And I've got them. 703 00:42:08,068 --> 00:42:10,986 And okay. How about this? 704 00:42:11,071 --> 00:42:15,450 Heather, Mondays at 7:30 p.m., is calling Lloyd. 705 00:42:15,533 --> 00:42:20,371 Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, also calling Lloyd. 706 00:42:20,455 --> 00:42:24,417 Same time. Fridays... You ready for this? 707 00:42:24,667 --> 00:42:28,421 1:30 p.m., she calls Lloyd. Take a guess why. 708 00:42:28,504 --> 00:42:30,673 -Chits and chats at Chuckie's? -Yes! 709 00:42:30,756 --> 00:42:32,717 -Yeah. -Yes! That sounds like fun. 710 00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:37,222 Friday is the day that Heather gets off work early. 711 00:42:37,305 --> 00:42:40,015 Nora works until 1:00. 712 00:42:40,100 --> 00:42:42,477 She comes home. She says goodbye to Heather. 713 00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:47,398 Heather goes out. Who does she call? Mr. FFF. 714 00:42:47,482 --> 00:42:50,485 That's right. I think she's reporting to him. 715 00:42:52,570 --> 00:42:56,699 Well, Mr. Vanderwheel, looks like we're having a reunion. 716 00:42:56,782 --> 00:42:59,494 -[grunts] Hey, you. -Hey, you. 717 00:43:02,037 --> 00:43:03,914 Don't play coy with me! 718 00:43:03,998 --> 00:43:07,001 I know I'm looking at two people who did the hokeypokey yesterday. 719 00:43:07,085 --> 00:43:08,878 -What? [chuckles nervously] -Bingo. 720 00:43:08,961 --> 00:43:14,217 Okay, you were giving money to Heather to spy on your ex-wife. 721 00:43:15,135 --> 00:43:16,136 Uh... 722 00:43:17,052 --> 00:43:18,304 What? [chuckles] 723 00:43:18,387 --> 00:43:19,388 I see you. 724 00:43:20,098 --> 00:43:22,600 Oh, I see you clearly. 725 00:43:23,184 --> 00:43:27,063 And let's not waste this moment of beautiful transparency 726 00:43:27,147 --> 00:43:32,485 by watching you throw a pile of stinky bullshit at my face. 727 00:43:32,568 --> 00:43:33,486 Okay! 728 00:43:33,736 --> 00:43:37,532 Okay, I planted Heather in Nora's home to get dirt on her. 729 00:43:38,283 --> 00:43:40,326 We're in the midst of a custody battle. 730 00:43:40,410 --> 00:43:43,288 And Heather would tell me things Nora would forget to do, 731 00:43:43,371 --> 00:43:45,123 like get Carys her flu shot. 732 00:43:45,206 --> 00:43:48,793 She told me the crap that Nora was feeding my kid. 733 00:43:48,876 --> 00:43:50,836 She told me what would stress Nora out. 734 00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:53,631 Besides me and my lawyer. 735 00:43:53,714 --> 00:43:55,883 [Fleur] Okay. Look, I'm gonna ask you a few questions, 736 00:43:55,966 --> 00:44:00,846 and, uh, Handsome over here's gonna know if you're telling the truth or not. 737 00:44:02,056 --> 00:44:03,266 Uh... 738 00:44:03,349 --> 00:44:06,144 Did Heather turn on you and threaten to give you up to your wife? 739 00:44:06,227 --> 00:44:07,061 No. 740 00:44:08,688 --> 00:44:13,526 No. Uh, was Heather blackmailing you for even more money? 741 00:44:13,609 --> 00:44:14,610 No. 742 00:44:14,694 --> 00:44:16,404 Did you like that move I did yesterday 743 00:44:16,487 --> 00:44:19,740 where I made your dick bend all the way to the right? 744 00:44:19,824 --> 00:44:22,034 [softly] I loved it. 745 00:44:26,497 --> 00:44:29,709 -[Sky] Bye! Have an explosive day. -Thank you. 746 00:44:30,418 --> 00:44:31,752 You can go in now. 747 00:44:33,254 --> 00:44:34,880 -Talking to me? -Yeah. 748 00:44:37,091 --> 00:44:39,093 [sighs] Appreciate it. 749 00:44:51,772 --> 00:44:56,902 Hey, Sky, is that the, uh, book of all your company's work? 750 00:44:56,986 --> 00:44:58,321 Mmm-hmm. Sure is. 751 00:44:58,404 --> 00:45:01,532 Wow, those are beautiful fireworks. 752 00:45:01,616 --> 00:45:02,867 -[Fleur] Oh, yeah. -Really. 753 00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:04,368 [Fleur] Very impactful. 754 00:45:05,703 --> 00:45:07,788 Could I borrow that book for a couple of days? 755 00:45:09,749 --> 00:45:13,461 Well, this is the coffee table book. 756 00:45:13,544 --> 00:45:16,088 Well, you've already taken it off the coffee table. 757 00:45:16,171 --> 00:45:19,425 Yeah, you have a point. But it'll go back over there soon. 758 00:45:21,636 --> 00:45:24,972 If you remove it, then what would I put on the coffee table? 759 00:45:25,055 --> 00:45:27,267 -You don't have a second book? -No. 760 00:45:27,350 --> 00:45:29,852 We get a monthly fireworks magazine, 761 00:45:29,935 --> 00:45:32,397 but it's not nice for putting out. [chuckles lightly] 762 00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:34,607 You could consider this an opportunity. 763 00:45:34,690 --> 00:45:37,234 -An opportunity? -Yeah. 764 00:45:37,318 --> 00:45:38,903 To get a second book. 765 00:45:39,487 --> 00:45:43,824 You could get a book on fireworks, plants, carpentry. 766 00:45:43,908 --> 00:45:45,826 Whatever you want. You're in charge. 767 00:45:54,502 --> 00:45:55,836 It's time. 768 00:45:58,088 --> 00:45:59,299 [sighs] 769 00:46:01,842 --> 00:46:03,177 Hi, Gene. 770 00:46:03,803 --> 00:46:06,347 -Nora, how're you doing? -Good! 771 00:46:06,430 --> 00:46:11,143 So, I think the mailman put one of your letters in my slot by mistake. 772 00:46:12,312 --> 00:46:15,356 Indeed they did. Thank you very much. 773 00:46:15,440 --> 00:46:17,775 -Can I ask you something? -Sure. 774 00:46:18,359 --> 00:46:22,321 Is that someone you put in jail and now they send you threats? 775 00:46:22,822 --> 00:46:24,740 [scoffs] No. Nothing like that. 776 00:46:24,824 --> 00:46:28,077 -Oh, come on. Tell me. -No, it's not. [sighs] 777 00:46:29,203 --> 00:46:31,664 A while back, I was into this woman. 778 00:46:31,872 --> 00:46:35,626 Her brother was in prison. She said, "Could I look at his case?" 779 00:46:35,710 --> 00:46:39,171 I did some investigating. And there wasn't much I could do. 780 00:46:39,255 --> 00:46:40,923 But I started a correspondence with him, 781 00:46:41,007 --> 00:46:43,884 and I thought it was gonna be a temporary thing, 782 00:46:44,468 --> 00:46:47,680 and here I am, ten years later, still getting letters. 783 00:46:47,763 --> 00:46:49,640 So you still read his letters? 784 00:46:49,724 --> 00:46:52,560 Of course! I feel bad tossing 'em. 785 00:46:52,643 --> 00:46:56,313 Besides, every once in a while, he writes some nice poetry. 786 00:46:56,397 --> 00:46:57,857 [laughs] 787 00:46:58,941 --> 00:47:00,360 What are you up to this evening? 788 00:47:00,443 --> 00:47:02,945 Oh, well, I'm on my own tonight. 789 00:47:03,028 --> 00:47:05,990 Just doing some online gambling. Carys is with her dad. 790 00:47:06,073 --> 00:47:08,158 -Oh. -Mmm-hmm. 791 00:47:08,242 --> 00:47:09,702 I'm always on my own. 792 00:47:09,785 --> 00:47:10,828 -Well. -Yeah. 793 00:47:11,746 --> 00:47:13,330 Would you like to come in? 794 00:47:14,415 --> 00:47:17,126 -[Nora] Were you working late? -Um... 795 00:47:18,335 --> 00:47:22,089 No, I was just, uh, out doing some errands. 796 00:47:22,172 --> 00:47:23,298 -Hmm. -Not a big deal. 797 00:47:23,383 --> 00:47:24,759 [chuckles lightly] 798 00:47:28,387 --> 00:47:29,347 You need another pillow? 799 00:47:31,181 --> 00:47:32,933 Uh, no, I'm comfortable. 800 00:47:34,519 --> 00:47:35,811 -Yeah. -Mmm-hmm. 801 00:47:35,895 --> 00:47:38,313 -How about some music? -Oh, yeah, that'd be great. 802 00:47:38,398 --> 00:47:39,649 Fantastic. 803 00:47:39,732 --> 00:47:44,779 You are in luck, 'cause I just started buying 45s. 804 00:47:44,862 --> 00:47:47,448 Last time I collected these, I was a little kid. 805 00:47:47,990 --> 00:47:51,827 My first 45 was "I Think I Love You" by the Partridge Family. 806 00:47:51,911 --> 00:47:53,871 Maybe that dates me. I don't know. 807 00:47:54,580 --> 00:47:57,291 Well, anyhow, this is one of my favorite songs. 808 00:47:58,376 --> 00:48:00,086 ["Fooled Around And Fell In Love" playing] 809 00:48:00,169 --> 00:48:02,088 Mmm-hmm, that's Elvin Bishop. 810 00:48:02,922 --> 00:48:03,923 Oh... 811 00:48:05,007 --> 00:48:06,091 Yeah. 812 00:48:06,175 --> 00:48:08,177 -This is a good one. -Yeah. 813 00:48:25,194 --> 00:48:26,862 d I must have been... d 814 00:48:26,946 --> 00:48:30,700 Elvin's a blues guitarist. Blues guitarist. 815 00:48:30,783 --> 00:48:32,618 His voice is very gravelly, 816 00:48:32,702 --> 00:48:33,953 and so, he wrote this song 817 00:48:34,036 --> 00:48:36,330 and didn't feel it was right for his voice. 818 00:48:36,413 --> 00:48:38,082 So he, uh... 819 00:48:38,165 --> 00:48:42,503 He let his, uh, backup singer, Mickey Thomas, sing the song. 820 00:48:42,587 --> 00:48:45,214 And it went on to be a big hit. Big hit. 821 00:48:46,632 --> 00:48:48,008 [groans] 822 00:48:48,092 --> 00:48:49,176 [mumbles] 823 00:48:51,971 --> 00:48:55,933 Yeah. Yeah. I like this chair better. Yeah. 824 00:48:57,727 --> 00:48:58,728 [exhales] 825 00:48:58,811 --> 00:49:01,230 d I fell in love d 826 00:49:01,313 --> 00:49:02,314 Mmm. 827 00:49:03,232 --> 00:49:08,445 I find the wooziness of that guitar 828 00:49:08,529 --> 00:49:10,239 so romantic. 829 00:49:10,322 --> 00:49:11,532 Yeah. 830 00:49:17,246 --> 00:49:20,165 Elvin Bishop's nickname was Pigboy Crabshaw. 831 00:49:20,249 --> 00:49:22,084 How about that? Pigboy Crabshaw! 832 00:49:22,167 --> 00:49:24,879 Where's a name like that come from? [sighs] 833 00:49:24,962 --> 00:49:26,296 I'm sorry. [cries] 834 00:49:27,590 --> 00:49:30,300 Wow. [sobbing] 835 00:49:30,384 --> 00:49:32,177 -What's going on? -Oh... 836 00:49:33,137 --> 00:49:35,097 I'm fine. [chuckles] 837 00:49:35,180 --> 00:49:37,808 I am a bit concerned. You know, you're crying. 838 00:49:37,892 --> 00:49:42,229 No, no, no, no, no. [stutters] It's fine. I just, um... 839 00:49:42,312 --> 00:49:43,313 Wow. 840 00:49:44,857 --> 00:49:50,988 [sighs] That song is just evoking something 841 00:49:51,071 --> 00:49:57,119 I want so badly for myself that it aches. 842 00:49:58,996 --> 00:50:00,414 For my kid. 843 00:50:02,207 --> 00:50:04,960 I have this dream of owning land. 844 00:50:05,044 --> 00:50:06,211 [chuckles lightly] 845 00:50:06,295 --> 00:50:11,091 [sniffles] And, um, I think about Ojai all the time. 846 00:50:11,967 --> 00:50:15,054 And in my dream, we have a couple acres. Nothing fancy. 847 00:50:15,763 --> 00:50:21,393 Enough that we have those, like, big beautiful reaching trees. 848 00:50:23,646 --> 00:50:25,397 And a bunch of dogs. 849 00:50:27,274 --> 00:50:30,653 And they just run through the grass with Carys, and... 850 00:50:32,029 --> 00:50:34,824 God! I love dogs so much. 851 00:50:37,284 --> 00:50:43,415 And in my fantasy, I'm not, like, staring into people's decaying mouths anymore. 852 00:50:43,499 --> 00:50:48,837 I'm massaging beautiful dogs for a living. 853 00:50:49,338 --> 00:50:50,506 It's my job. 854 00:50:51,757 --> 00:50:56,011 And I'm spending time with my daughter. 855 00:50:56,095 --> 00:51:00,725 My weird... [cries] awesome kid. 856 00:51:04,436 --> 00:51:06,063 [sniffles] And, you know, we're just... 857 00:51:06,146 --> 00:51:09,399 we're so far away from all of the fighting, and the... 858 00:51:09,483 --> 00:51:14,029 and all the lawyers, and just all of that crap. 859 00:51:17,449 --> 00:51:18,367 God. 860 00:51:19,326 --> 00:51:23,163 And for some reason... [sniffles] in this song, I can just... 861 00:51:23,247 --> 00:51:24,832 I can really feel that. 862 00:51:26,417 --> 00:51:27,293 [sniffles] 863 00:51:28,127 --> 00:51:30,880 I can feel what it would be like to have that. 864 00:51:33,507 --> 00:51:34,967 God! [sniffles] 865 00:51:35,926 --> 00:51:37,594 That's why I'm crying. 866 00:51:39,513 --> 00:51:41,682 -I have the same exact dream. -[snickers] 867 00:51:42,892 --> 00:51:46,478 -[chuckling] You do? -Yeah. Exactly the same. 868 00:51:47,521 --> 00:51:50,024 I dream about the open land, 869 00:51:50,107 --> 00:51:53,610 the green, the trees, the dogs. 870 00:51:53,694 --> 00:51:55,738 Specifically, this dog. 871 00:51:55,821 --> 00:52:00,534 And, uh, not being a dog masseuse. That's not something I'm interested in. 872 00:52:00,617 --> 00:52:01,869 It's not for everybody. 873 00:52:01,952 --> 00:52:06,581 But, um, you know, [stutters] I love all that. 874 00:52:06,666 --> 00:52:11,754 And one thing that I don't have, that you have, is just the family aspect. 875 00:52:11,837 --> 00:52:14,256 I... I dream of having a family. Yeah. 876 00:52:15,174 --> 00:52:16,175 [clicks tongue] Hmm. 877 00:52:19,553 --> 00:52:22,139 [sighs heavily] Isn't it so weird 878 00:52:22,932 --> 00:52:28,145 how you can miss something that you never had? 879 00:52:29,063 --> 00:52:30,064 It is. 880 00:52:32,316 --> 00:52:33,818 [both chuckle lightly] 881 00:52:49,249 --> 00:52:50,459 You want some tea? 882 00:52:53,253 --> 00:52:54,254 Hmm? 883 00:52:58,300 --> 00:52:59,760 [inhales sharply] 884 00:53:01,095 --> 00:53:03,764 What do you think about a shaved pussy? 885 00:53:07,559 --> 00:53:08,602 What? 886 00:53:15,650 --> 00:53:17,069 [sighs] 887 00:53:38,465 --> 00:53:39,466 [groans] Hmm. 888 00:53:40,300 --> 00:53:42,511 Yeah. I'm getting up. 889 00:53:44,346 --> 00:53:45,514 [grunts] 890 00:54:45,365 --> 00:54:46,366 Huh. 891 00:55:20,275 --> 00:55:23,487 Then she mumbled, "What do you think about a shaved pussy?" 892 00:55:23,570 --> 00:55:25,197 I mean, who says something like that? 893 00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:29,243 Was she casually checking out my opinion? Was she taking a poll? 894 00:55:29,326 --> 00:55:31,120 Was she gauging my interest? What is that? 895 00:55:31,203 --> 00:55:34,331 Hey, look, I mean, it could've just been a point of personal curiosity, 896 00:55:34,414 --> 00:55:37,334 like, "What do you think of this shade of lipstick?" type of thing. 897 00:55:37,417 --> 00:55:39,503 -[clears throat] -[sighs] That's what I'm afraid of. 898 00:55:39,586 --> 00:55:44,049 Yeah. Speaking of which, I have a very slightly achy vagina today. 899 00:55:44,133 --> 00:55:45,342 I'm so sorry. 900 00:55:45,425 --> 00:55:48,303 Eh, I'm walking a little funny. I mean, look, it's only slightly. 901 00:55:49,263 --> 00:55:50,764 [Handsome] Mr. Vanderwheel! 902 00:55:50,847 --> 00:55:52,557 [indistinct chatter] 903 00:55:58,438 --> 00:56:01,733 -You're a difficult man to get ahold of. -His girth is nuts. 904 00:56:03,110 --> 00:56:04,153 Hey. 905 00:56:04,236 --> 00:56:08,448 Uh, heard from Sky that you were out here, uh, hooking up another event, 906 00:56:08,532 --> 00:56:11,035 and so, uh, I just got a few more questions for you. 907 00:56:11,118 --> 00:56:12,119 That's no problem. 908 00:56:12,202 --> 00:56:16,206 Tell me about the, uh, Lalalime party. 909 00:56:16,623 --> 00:56:19,459 Did I ever tell you? Uh, you know, I fucked the founder of Lalalime once. 910 00:56:19,543 --> 00:56:21,461 I got a free pair of pants out of it, so... 911 00:56:21,545 --> 00:56:22,712 -Very helpful. -Yeah. 912 00:56:22,796 --> 00:56:25,507 Yeah, right, yeah, we did the show for that party, yeah. 913 00:56:25,591 --> 00:56:27,342 And did you, uh, bring Heather? 914 00:56:27,718 --> 00:56:29,761 Actually, yeah, I did. 915 00:56:30,012 --> 00:56:32,597 When she found out it was, uh, a celebrity-packed thing, 916 00:56:32,681 --> 00:56:33,765 she begged to come. 917 00:56:33,848 --> 00:56:38,103 Said that I could back off on buying her expensive finery 918 00:56:38,187 --> 00:56:40,647 in exchange for me bringing her as my assistant. 919 00:56:40,731 --> 00:56:41,940 Sorry, back up. "Finery"? 920 00:56:42,816 --> 00:56:44,193 What's that? 921 00:56:44,276 --> 00:56:47,029 I don't know. But she talked about it all the time. 922 00:56:47,112 --> 00:56:49,739 It's luxury clothing for the modern woman. 923 00:56:50,324 --> 00:56:51,825 Okay. What the fuck? 924 00:56:51,908 --> 00:56:53,868 -So I know. Shoot me. -[sighs] 925 00:56:53,953 --> 00:56:56,956 Hey, look, was she, uh, talking to any particular people at this party? 926 00:56:57,039 --> 00:56:58,040 Anything we should know? 927 00:56:58,457 --> 00:57:01,376 I mean, she definitely was making the rounds, 928 00:57:01,460 --> 00:57:04,671 but I was so busy overseeing the Dragon Dicks, I couldn't... 929 00:57:04,755 --> 00:57:05,714 [chuckles] 930 00:57:05,797 --> 00:57:10,552 Oh, it's, uh... It's an industry nickname for grounded fountains. 931 00:57:10,636 --> 00:57:13,639 Uh, anyway, I couldn't, like, keep an eye on her nonstop. 932 00:57:14,139 --> 00:57:16,433 -There were, uh, gift bags there, correct? -Yeah. 933 00:57:16,516 --> 00:57:18,143 -From, uh, the Silky Lamb? -What? 934 00:57:18,226 --> 00:57:19,937 -Did you get one? -Oh, no, no, no, no. No. 935 00:57:20,020 --> 00:57:23,899 Those... those bags weren't for us. Those were closely guarded. 936 00:57:24,483 --> 00:57:26,109 Apparently, in these bags, 937 00:57:26,193 --> 00:57:29,989 there was a lotion and a cream that was worth 1,000 bucks. 938 00:57:30,572 --> 00:57:32,491 -You say a lotion and a cream? -Yeah. 939 00:57:32,992 --> 00:57:34,784 A thousand bucks. Can you believe that? 940 00:57:34,868 --> 00:57:36,453 Lotion and a cream? 941 00:57:36,536 --> 00:57:38,372 Heather tried to take a bag. They made her give it back. 942 00:57:38,455 --> 00:57:40,499 Said it was only for famous people. 943 00:57:40,707 --> 00:57:41,959 -Are we good? -We're good. 944 00:57:42,042 --> 00:57:44,169 -Got all we need. Thank you. -All right. 945 00:57:44,253 --> 00:57:45,254 [Fleur] Thank you. 946 00:57:47,714 --> 00:57:50,342 Oh, hey, uh, so listen, I was just thinking, uh... 947 00:57:50,425 --> 00:57:53,387 I think I'm gonna hang back for a second, get more details on the party. 948 00:57:53,470 --> 00:57:55,180 Nothing you need to concern yourself with, 949 00:57:55,263 --> 00:57:57,015 I just wanna make sure we cover our bases. 950 00:57:58,558 --> 00:58:02,437 Where is this, uh, gonna take place? I don't see any space for that. 951 00:58:02,521 --> 00:58:04,939 Oh, yeah. Well, you wouldn't, right? [chuckles] So... 952 00:58:05,024 --> 00:58:06,150 [sighs] 953 00:58:06,233 --> 00:58:07,817 [cell phone ringing] 954 00:58:11,113 --> 00:58:11,947 Handsome. 955 00:58:12,656 --> 00:58:16,076 Ingredient analysis on the girl's cream came back from the lab. 956 00:58:16,160 --> 00:58:18,120 It matches a rarified brand. 957 00:58:18,203 --> 00:58:19,496 Fancy-pants. 958 00:58:20,330 --> 00:58:21,498 Silky Lamb? 959 00:58:21,581 --> 00:58:23,917 -That's it! -Of course it is. 960 00:58:24,001 --> 00:58:26,503 -Lil' dab'll do ya. -Indeed, Lester. 961 00:58:26,586 --> 00:58:29,506 A lil' dab'll do ya. Have a good day. 962 00:58:43,103 --> 00:58:44,646 [door creaks] 963 00:58:52,362 --> 00:58:54,031 [dog barking in the distance] 964 00:59:19,056 --> 00:59:20,890 [barking continues] 965 00:59:53,382 --> 00:59:55,049 [grunting] 966 00:59:55,134 --> 00:59:56,801 Oh, my fucking back! 967 01:00:01,973 --> 01:00:03,725 [continues grunting] 968 01:00:06,270 --> 01:00:07,937 [groaning] Ow. 969 01:00:11,816 --> 01:00:13,527 My back. Ow. 970 01:00:13,610 --> 01:00:16,280 Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 971 01:00:16,363 --> 01:00:17,822 [groaning] 972 01:00:25,247 --> 01:00:27,207 Yeah. I'll get you some water. 973 01:00:27,291 --> 01:00:29,042 Oh, is that good! 974 01:00:29,126 --> 01:00:32,546 Look at how delicious this water is! You're gonna love it. 975 01:00:32,629 --> 01:00:34,714 All right. Mmm, diggity. 976 01:00:35,465 --> 01:00:37,342 All right. There you go. 977 01:00:37,425 --> 01:00:41,304 This'll make you feel better. All right. [grunts] 978 01:00:41,388 --> 01:00:44,516 Let's get some... air for you. 979 01:00:45,809 --> 01:00:46,643 Ah, there we go. 980 01:00:49,938 --> 01:00:53,233 Feel better? Feels nice, right? [sniffles] 981 01:00:53,317 --> 01:00:55,194 -What we got going on? -[whimpers] 982 01:01:22,304 --> 01:01:23,847 [knocking on door] 983 01:01:28,185 --> 01:01:30,229 Detective, well! 984 01:01:30,312 --> 01:01:33,273 Come to check on my well-being? Now that's service. 985 01:01:33,357 --> 01:01:36,235 -Yeah. I'm in the service industry. -[chuckles] 986 01:01:41,740 --> 01:01:43,575 I'm sorry, did I interrupt your swim? 987 01:01:43,658 --> 01:01:45,410 Oh, no, it's fine, it's fine. 988 01:01:45,494 --> 01:01:48,288 You know, there comes a point at which one can be too fit. 989 01:01:48,372 --> 01:01:49,873 I've gotta watch myself sometimes. 990 01:01:49,956 --> 01:01:53,210 Yeah, as, uh, an actor, your body is your instrument. 991 01:01:53,293 --> 01:01:54,378 That's so true. 992 01:01:54,461 --> 01:01:58,715 You know, when I'm performing, I'm never just delivering a line. I'm... 993 01:01:58,798 --> 01:02:00,217 vibrating. 994 01:02:01,510 --> 01:02:03,720 No wonder the ladies love you so much. 995 01:02:05,722 --> 01:02:08,308 My vibrating isn't something to joke about. 996 01:02:09,184 --> 01:02:10,435 Right, right. 997 01:02:11,478 --> 01:02:17,567 So I just came by to make sure that all your windows and doors are secure 998 01:02:17,651 --> 01:02:20,153 and nothing could happen, you know... 999 01:02:20,237 --> 01:02:23,365 Well, this is a bit, uh... Oh, good. All right. 1000 01:02:23,448 --> 01:02:26,951 Yeah. Yeah. That is solid as a rock. 1001 01:02:27,035 --> 01:02:28,620 You are good to go. 1002 01:02:28,703 --> 01:02:30,497 Do you have any other doors like this in your house? 1003 01:02:30,580 --> 01:02:33,708 -Why, yes! Off the balcony in my bedroom. -Mmm. 1004 01:02:33,792 --> 01:02:35,585 By the way, there's no ice in there. 1005 01:02:37,587 --> 01:02:39,673 That's wonderful. After you. 1006 01:02:44,010 --> 01:02:46,721 Yeah, you wouldn't want anyone coming in here while you're sleeping, 1007 01:02:46,805 --> 01:02:47,931 being vulnerable. 1008 01:02:48,014 --> 01:02:49,057 Oh, God, no. 1009 01:02:49,140 --> 01:02:51,310 My emotional vulnerability is already at such peak level. 1010 01:02:51,393 --> 01:02:53,812 To think I'd also be physically vulnerable? [chuckles] 1011 01:02:55,897 --> 01:03:00,026 Yeah. Well, you know what? All tight. All good. 1012 01:03:00,110 --> 01:03:01,027 Yeah. 1013 01:03:01,528 --> 01:03:05,031 Well, looky-looky! How about that? 1014 01:03:07,075 --> 01:03:08,702 Got the Silky Lamb. 1015 01:03:09,869 --> 01:03:11,079 How about that? 1016 01:03:11,162 --> 01:03:13,873 You know, I hear great things about the companion lotion. 1017 01:03:13,957 --> 01:03:15,083 Do you have that, too? 1018 01:03:15,166 --> 01:03:19,004 Well, the lotion I gave to a friend. The creme is the superior product. 1019 01:03:19,713 --> 01:03:21,465 -The creme? -Creme. 1020 01:03:23,091 --> 01:03:24,426 Tell me about the creme. 1021 01:03:24,509 --> 01:03:29,180 Do you see how well-moisturized I appear, even though I just got out of the pool? 1022 01:03:29,263 --> 01:03:31,600 You're a very shiny individual. 1023 01:03:32,559 --> 01:03:35,979 I applied just a dime-sized dollop of Silky Lamb 1024 01:03:36,062 --> 01:03:38,940 when I got out of bed this morning. That's it. 1025 01:03:39,524 --> 01:03:40,442 No. 1026 01:03:40,525 --> 01:03:42,986 Yes. It's totally water-resistant. 1027 01:03:43,069 --> 01:03:45,279 Fucking genius! I swear by it. 1028 01:03:45,363 --> 01:03:46,448 A lil' dab'll do ya. 1029 01:03:46,531 --> 01:03:48,575 [laughing] Huh? 1030 01:03:52,245 --> 01:03:55,665 Well, this takes over the room. Look at that. 1031 01:03:55,749 --> 01:03:57,501 Oh, yes. That was a gift I received, 1032 01:03:57,584 --> 01:03:59,836 when I wrapped the film Atlas Shrugged Again. 1033 01:04:00,211 --> 01:04:02,797 Yeah, I don't normally do light romantic comedies, 1034 01:04:02,881 --> 01:04:07,301 but I felt I wanted to give back to some of my, well, simpler fans. 1035 01:04:07,386 --> 01:04:10,514 Yeah, that movie. Huh, can't all be winners. 1036 01:04:11,097 --> 01:04:12,265 Um, what? 1037 01:04:12,349 --> 01:04:15,352 Oh, please! That movie was a piece of crap. 1038 01:04:16,060 --> 01:04:18,438 But, come on, that happens. 1039 01:04:18,522 --> 01:04:20,524 Oh, that reminds me. 1040 01:04:21,274 --> 01:04:23,526 Remember the last time we saw each other, 1041 01:04:23,610 --> 01:04:27,614 we talked about, uh, your movie Patty-Cake? 1042 01:04:27,989 --> 01:04:29,991 You know, the movie you watched 1043 01:04:30,074 --> 01:04:34,746 the night that that monster dropped that body off on your front lawn. 1044 01:04:34,829 --> 01:04:37,832 Yes, that was a terrifying evening. I shall never forget it. 1045 01:04:37,916 --> 01:04:42,462 Well, I watched it because you got me intrigued by your performance. 1046 01:04:42,546 --> 01:04:44,714 -And? -Well... 1047 01:04:44,798 --> 01:04:46,591 Well, what? 1048 01:04:46,675 --> 01:04:48,342 You were a kid. What did you know? 1049 01:04:49,886 --> 01:04:53,390 Well, I'm sorry. [chuckling] You don't know what you're talking about. 1050 01:04:53,473 --> 01:04:55,850 Oh, come on. Those line readings? 1051 01:04:56,935 --> 01:04:59,813 Bit histrionic, don't you think? Heavy-handed. 1052 01:04:59,896 --> 01:05:04,859 It's as if you were attempting to act, as opposed to just acting. 1053 01:05:07,904 --> 01:05:11,116 How fucking dare you. 1054 01:05:11,199 --> 01:05:12,784 I was luminous! 1055 01:05:13,451 --> 01:05:14,953 I fucking killed it. 1056 01:05:15,036 --> 01:05:16,538 [breathing heavily] 1057 01:05:16,621 --> 01:05:20,333 Those scenes hold up, you fucking half-wit! 1058 01:05:21,876 --> 01:05:23,962 You've got quite a temper. 1059 01:05:24,629 --> 01:05:29,467 I betcha Heather Dromgoole brought out your dark side 1060 01:05:29,551 --> 01:05:33,054 when she made fun of your performance right to your face. 1061 01:05:36,099 --> 01:05:38,685 -Never met her. -Oh, I think otherwise. 1062 01:05:38,768 --> 01:05:43,272 As a matter of fact, I've got a half-wit theory about it. 1063 01:05:44,190 --> 01:05:45,692 [indistinct chatter] 1064 01:05:53,199 --> 01:05:56,119 [Handsome] I think you met Heather at the Lalalime party. 1065 01:06:00,206 --> 01:06:03,376 I think when she was denied a Silky Lamb gift bag, 1066 01:06:03,460 --> 01:06:05,545 she went looking for a celebrity. 1067 01:06:05,629 --> 01:06:07,130 And she found you. 1068 01:06:13,678 --> 01:06:15,429 [inaudible] 1069 01:06:23,813 --> 01:06:27,358 [Handsome] She came home with you. You two had sex to seal the deal. 1070 01:06:32,739 --> 01:06:36,242 And she landed that Silky Lamb lotion as a parting gift. 1071 01:06:45,585 --> 01:06:50,131 She stopped by the night of the murder. Things got sexy again. 1072 01:06:50,214 --> 01:06:54,302 I think you creamed Heather head to toe before you made love to her. 1073 01:07:05,354 --> 01:07:07,148 [laughing maniacally] 1074 01:07:09,859 --> 01:07:13,780 After sex, you two were lounging around, flipping through the channels. 1075 01:07:14,531 --> 01:07:17,492 Ooh! Oh! It's my movie. 1076 01:07:17,576 --> 01:07:21,705 [Handsome] You found your own movie! You never pass up watching your own movie. 1077 01:07:21,788 --> 01:07:23,873 This is the worst thing I've ever seen. 1078 01:07:23,957 --> 01:07:26,960 [Handsome] I think Heather made fun of your crappy performance. 1079 01:07:27,043 --> 01:07:30,630 Is this, like, before you took acting classes? This thing sucks. 1080 01:07:30,714 --> 01:07:33,216 Patty-cake, patty-cake, baker's man. 1081 01:07:33,299 --> 01:07:34,843 [Handsome] She had a bad habit of that. 1082 01:07:34,926 --> 01:07:38,012 You know, people I talked to said she liked to do a little ribbing. 1083 01:07:41,224 --> 01:07:43,226 I think she was standing about right here. 1084 01:07:43,810 --> 01:07:48,231 And then you got angry. Yeah, real angry. 1085 01:07:49,983 --> 01:07:52,735 You shoved Heather from a dark place of inner rage. 1086 01:07:53,444 --> 01:07:56,364 But I think she was very greasy. Very slippery. 1087 01:07:56,948 --> 01:07:59,576 And she fell backwards into your statue, 1088 01:07:59,659 --> 01:08:02,954 which, of course, explains the globe-shaped dent in her head. 1089 01:08:03,037 --> 01:08:07,208 A woman lay dead on your floor because of your fragile ego. 1090 01:08:07,875 --> 01:08:09,127 And then you panicked. 1091 01:08:09,210 --> 01:08:12,005 And you went to your neighbor's garage and you chopped her up 1092 01:08:12,088 --> 01:08:15,759 to make it look like it was some sort of serial killer type thing. 1093 01:08:15,842 --> 01:08:19,428 Your cuts were so profoundly sloppy 1094 01:08:19,512 --> 01:08:21,640 because your hands were heavily creamed, 1095 01:08:21,723 --> 01:08:24,100 the tools slipping in and out. 1096 01:08:24,183 --> 01:08:28,312 And then you chopped up her body and threw it out on your front lawn. 1097 01:08:28,396 --> 01:08:30,607 Like a pile of dog shit. 1098 01:08:30,690 --> 01:08:35,403 'Cause who's gonna suspect a killer of dumping a body on their own front lawn? 1099 01:08:35,486 --> 01:08:38,572 Now here's where I was really confused. 1100 01:08:38,657 --> 01:08:41,701 The Star of David? That one had me miffed. 1101 01:08:41,785 --> 01:08:43,828 And then, I figured it out! 1102 01:08:43,912 --> 01:08:47,081 You're a self-loathing Jew. You're a self-loathing Jew. 1103 01:08:47,165 --> 01:08:48,457 [screams] 1104 01:08:48,541 --> 01:08:51,127 [screams and groans] 1105 01:08:51,210 --> 01:08:52,712 [Talbert] You bastard! 1106 01:08:52,796 --> 01:08:55,256 -You're gonna end up dead on my lawn, too! -Get off me! 1107 01:08:55,339 --> 01:08:56,633 [laughs maniacally] 1108 01:08:56,716 --> 01:08:58,384 [both grunting] 1109 01:08:59,969 --> 01:09:01,429 [struggling] 1110 01:09:01,512 --> 01:09:02,513 [groans] 1111 01:09:03,682 --> 01:09:05,349 [both grunting] 1112 01:09:09,437 --> 01:09:10,604 Freeze, asshole! 1113 01:09:12,649 --> 01:09:15,026 -How? -The sliding door by the pool. 1114 01:09:15,109 --> 01:09:18,446 [pants] But you checked the door. You jiggled the handle! 1115 01:09:18,529 --> 01:09:21,866 That was a fake jiggle, my friend. 1116 01:09:22,491 --> 01:09:23,868 I should be an actor. 1117 01:09:28,081 --> 01:09:29,623 [indistinct chatter] 1118 01:09:29,708 --> 01:09:33,252 Well... [grunts] I guess that explains why my vagina was achy all morning. 1119 01:09:33,336 --> 01:09:34,378 Why's that? 1120 01:09:34,462 --> 01:09:38,049 Well, you know, it knew you were gonna need help. It was pulsing a warning. 1121 01:09:38,132 --> 01:09:40,134 So that's your finely-tuned intuition? 1122 01:09:40,218 --> 01:09:42,011 Oh, yeah. Either that or, 1123 01:09:42,095 --> 01:09:44,597 you know, my pussy can't handle more than four toes anymore. 1124 01:09:44,681 --> 01:09:45,974 -[laughs] -I hope it's not that. 1125 01:09:46,057 --> 01:09:48,977 -I love you for so many reasons. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1126 01:09:51,604 --> 01:09:53,690 [Joe] Hey, Bacorn, nice bathrobe. 1127 01:09:53,773 --> 01:09:55,524 Fuck you, Joe Kenda. Fuck you! 1128 01:09:56,442 --> 01:09:58,027 You wouldn't like me. I just lay there. 1129 01:10:03,157 --> 01:10:05,159 -Lieutenant. -Detective Handsome. 1130 01:10:05,243 --> 01:10:07,286 I told you it was the ex-boyfriend. 1131 01:10:07,620 --> 01:10:10,957 The old "If I can't have you, no one can have you" trick. 1132 01:10:12,083 --> 01:10:15,628 Yeah, that's a... that's a good theory, uh, but he's not the ex... 1133 01:10:15,712 --> 01:10:19,298 Well, yes, he's the ex-boyfriend. Good one. Good theory. 1134 01:10:22,969 --> 01:10:24,345 What the fuck? 1135 01:10:25,471 --> 01:10:27,849 Hi. [stammers] What is going on here? 1136 01:10:27,932 --> 01:10:30,434 Hi. Detective Handsome, LAPD. 1137 01:10:30,518 --> 01:10:32,103 -Kaley. You know... -Hi, Kaley. 1138 01:10:32,186 --> 01:10:33,271 I live right there. 1139 01:10:33,354 --> 01:10:34,522 -You live right there. -Yeah. 1140 01:10:34,605 --> 01:10:35,689 So it's your dog. 1141 01:10:35,773 --> 01:10:38,401 -Oh, my God, is... is my dog okay? -Dog's good. 1142 01:10:38,985 --> 01:10:41,988 Oh. What is this shit going on next to my house, man? 1143 01:10:42,071 --> 01:10:44,949 Uh, your neighbor, uh, murdered somebody. 1144 01:10:45,033 --> 01:10:47,368 This is ridiculous. I just got back from vacation. 1145 01:10:47,451 --> 01:10:50,704 And here I am, coming back to all this commotion next to my house. 1146 01:10:50,789 --> 01:10:52,706 Wait a second. You're Kaley Cuoco. 1147 01:10:54,250 --> 01:10:55,835 -Yeah. -Wow. 1148 01:10:55,919 --> 01:10:57,879 -I love saying your name. -Oh. 1149 01:10:57,962 --> 01:10:59,422 -It's a delight. -That's nice. 1150 01:10:59,505 --> 01:11:01,174 It rolls off the tongue. Kaley Cuoco. 1151 01:11:01,257 --> 01:11:03,676 Do you need any help solving this one? 1152 01:11:03,760 --> 01:11:05,053 -No, we're good. -Okay. 1153 01:11:05,136 --> 01:11:07,972 Even though you're Kaley Cuoco and I'd love to say, "Come on in." 1154 01:11:08,056 --> 01:11:09,182 -[chuckles] Okay. -It's all solved. 1155 01:11:09,265 --> 01:11:11,350 -All right. Great. -He's being taken away. 1156 01:11:11,434 --> 01:11:12,476 This is so fucked up. 1157 01:11:12,560 --> 01:11:14,937 You know what... Driver! Take me back to the airport. 1158 01:11:16,272 --> 01:11:18,274 -Enjoy your good looks. -All right. 1159 01:11:18,357 --> 01:11:19,358 Wow. 1160 01:11:24,322 --> 01:11:26,240 [narrator] "A Lil' Epilogue'll Do Ya." 1161 01:11:27,950 --> 01:11:31,287 Wow, I am so lucky that I met you. 1162 01:11:32,705 --> 01:11:35,041 Honestly, I look at your face and I just... 1163 01:11:35,708 --> 01:11:38,127 [chuckles] I don't even know how to talk about it. 1164 01:11:38,211 --> 01:11:41,130 Seriously, this feeling I have is just... 1165 01:11:41,214 --> 01:11:44,092 bigger than anything I could ever explain to you. 1166 01:11:44,175 --> 01:11:46,177 I cannot believe that you... 1167 01:11:46,260 --> 01:11:48,554 Miss, we're just about wrapped up inside and ready to bail. 1168 01:11:48,637 --> 01:11:51,850 Great! Thank you. You can call me Nora. 1169 01:11:51,933 --> 01:11:54,477 -Hmm, Nora it is. -[chuckles] 1170 01:11:54,560 --> 01:11:56,813 And we found this Tupperware of cookies on the side of the washer. 1171 01:11:56,896 --> 01:11:57,981 You taking these with? 1172 01:11:58,064 --> 01:11:59,816 Oh, no, those are gross. You can toss them out. 1173 01:11:59,899 --> 01:12:00,984 All right. 1174 01:12:02,651 --> 01:12:03,820 [Nora] Hmm. 1175 01:12:05,488 --> 01:12:06,697 [inhales sharply] 1176 01:12:06,781 --> 01:12:09,575 Anyway, back to what I was saying before. 1177 01:12:10,284 --> 01:12:13,454 I cannot believe you have done this for me. I really can't. 1178 01:12:13,955 --> 01:12:17,917 Well, if a person can make someone else happy, they ought to do it, right? 1179 01:12:18,001 --> 01:12:21,921 Right. I can tell it makes you a little uncomfortable to be thanked, so I'll stop. 1180 01:12:22,004 --> 01:12:23,798 We were gonna have you up once we get settled, 1181 01:12:23,881 --> 01:12:27,844 but then I realized you would not be comfortable with that. 1182 01:12:27,927 --> 01:12:29,720 I don't think I'd be uncomfortable with-- 1183 01:12:29,803 --> 01:12:32,849 Yeah, no, I know you would hate that power dynamic. 1184 01:12:32,932 --> 01:12:37,228 Me, just, like, so grateful. [chuckles] You, a goddamn angel. 1185 01:12:37,311 --> 01:12:38,980 I don't know that I would go calling me an angel. 1186 01:12:39,063 --> 01:12:40,731 Yeah. And like an angel, 1187 01:12:40,814 --> 01:12:43,817 it's better for you to just stay at a distance. 1188 01:12:43,901 --> 01:12:45,194 Observe from the clouds. 1189 01:12:45,862 --> 01:12:50,449 [laughing] You don't want me calling you and sticking around in your life. 1190 01:12:50,533 --> 01:12:53,119 I know you would not be comfortable with an arrangement like that, 1191 01:12:53,202 --> 01:12:54,370 so I'll save you from the pressure. 1192 01:12:54,453 --> 01:12:55,746 [stammers] I'd be comfortable. It'd be okay. 1193 01:12:55,829 --> 01:12:57,165 Yeah. Carys! 1194 01:12:57,248 --> 01:12:58,499 Honey, come here. 1195 01:13:00,209 --> 01:13:03,880 I want you to say thank you to Gene before we never see him again, okay? 1196 01:13:03,963 --> 01:13:05,048 I don't want to. 1197 01:13:05,131 --> 01:13:06,215 -[Handsome] That's okay. -[Nora] Carys. 1198 01:13:06,299 --> 01:13:08,551 -She doesn't have to, it's not-- -I wasn't finished. 1199 01:13:09,051 --> 01:13:11,345 I don't wanna thank him in words. 1200 01:13:11,637 --> 01:13:14,182 I'll thank him with a dance. 1201 01:13:16,434 --> 01:13:20,438 This is the shining youth of America. [chortles] 1202 01:13:33,117 --> 01:13:34,160 [Charles vocalizing] 1203 01:13:34,243 --> 01:13:37,663 [whispering] Yes, yes, yes. 1204 01:13:47,798 --> 01:13:48,799 Ha! 1205 01:13:55,598 --> 01:13:59,060 Well, I think I should be thanking you. 1206 01:13:59,310 --> 01:14:01,562 That was something. 1207 01:14:02,521 --> 01:14:03,606 [Nora] Hmm. 1208 01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:07,818 [Nora sighs] 1209 01:14:09,445 --> 01:14:10,529 Goodbye, Gene. 1210 01:14:12,698 --> 01:14:13,532 Forever. 1211 01:14:19,372 --> 01:14:20,539 We're all good, Nora. 1212 01:14:24,043 --> 01:14:26,379 -Oh, okay. -[chuckles] Mmm. 1213 01:14:28,006 --> 01:14:29,715 [both] Mmm... 1214 01:14:31,467 --> 01:14:32,676 [Nora] Mmm. 1215 01:14:33,719 --> 01:14:34,928 [man] Mmm. 1216 01:14:36,222 --> 01:14:37,348 [Nora] Ah. 1217 01:14:40,018 --> 01:14:42,520 -[Handsome softly] Oh, boy. -[Nora and man] Mmm. 1218 01:14:43,479 --> 01:14:44,605 -[chuckles] -Mmm. 1219 01:14:49,485 --> 01:14:51,237 [moving truck engine starting] 1220 01:14:51,320 --> 01:14:52,488 [door opens and closes] 1221 01:14:55,491 --> 01:14:56,617 [car door opens and closes] 1222 01:14:56,700 --> 01:14:58,036 [car engine starts] 1223 01:15:05,835 --> 01:15:11,132 Boy, uh... that's, uh, not what I expected. 1224 01:15:13,050 --> 01:15:15,052 It is what it is. Yeah. 1225 01:15:17,846 --> 01:15:19,640 Au revoir, Detective. 1226 01:15:20,849 --> 01:15:23,061 -Yeah, later, Charles. -Yeah. Excuse me. 1227 01:15:25,063 --> 01:15:26,064 Um... 1228 01:15:27,398 --> 01:15:29,733 -You're in... you're in my way. -Yeah, yeah. 1229 01:15:31,069 --> 01:15:32,945 Yeah, come on. Candy, over here. 1230 01:15:33,029 --> 01:15:34,738 -Okay. -All right. 1231 01:15:40,786 --> 01:15:43,539 All right, come on, sweetie. Let's go, come on. 1232 01:15:50,880 --> 01:15:52,465 [Durante] Hey, Handsome! 1233 01:15:52,965 --> 01:15:54,967 Neighbors moving out already? 1234 01:15:56,969 --> 01:15:58,096 -[Candy barks] -[Handsome] Shh. 1235 01:15:58,179 --> 01:16:00,264 -[barking continues] -[softly] It's okay. 1236 01:16:00,348 --> 01:16:02,475 Yeah, she's heading out to Ojai. 1237 01:16:02,558 --> 01:16:04,560 She got a couple acres and a little farmhouse. 1238 01:16:04,643 --> 01:16:05,978 What's she gonna do out there? 1239 01:16:06,062 --> 01:16:08,606 Well, she's given up being a dental assistant. 1240 01:16:08,689 --> 01:16:11,734 She's gonna go into canine massage. 1241 01:16:11,817 --> 01:16:13,944 She found a program there. 1242 01:16:14,027 --> 01:16:18,157 Two hundred hours, you're in. It's kind of holistic. She's very excited. 1243 01:16:18,908 --> 01:16:21,952 Wonder what kind of money you can make massaging dogs. 1244 01:16:22,536 --> 01:16:23,412 She'll be fine. 1245 01:16:27,500 --> 01:16:29,252 It is what it is. 1246 01:16:29,794 --> 01:16:30,920 [accordion playing] 1247 01:16:34,715 --> 01:16:35,841 Later. 1248 01:16:36,801 --> 01:16:38,761 Coming, Esta! 1249 01:16:42,390 --> 01:16:43,724 [door closes] 1250 01:16:45,434 --> 01:16:47,060 [whispers] Yeah. Go ahead. 1251 01:17:18,926 --> 01:17:20,928 [surf rock music playing] 1252 01:17:23,928 --> 01:17:27,928 Preuzeto sa www.titlovi.com 100388

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