Original subtitles

[wind whooshing]

[eerie synth music]

[bats chirping] [wings flapping]

[pins clattering]

♪ Oooh yeah

♪ Oh

♪ Here in the darkness

♪ Here in the darkness

♪ Here in the darkness

♪ Here in the darkness

♪ Oh yeah

[eerie synth music continues]

♪ Here in the darkness

[light music]

- I wonder what tonight will be like.

- It'll be life changing.

- You think it'll be worth it?

- My older brother was a Sig Ep, and the girls that went

to their parties never paid for a drink, ever.

- I was thinking more like my future.

Like, will this help me find a better job?

Get a better man?

- [scoffs] You don't need a man to get through life.

- I know I don't need one.

But what's wrong with the girl wanting one?

- Put it this way.

Four or five, maybe six years without buying a drink?

Imagine the shoes you could get with all those savings.

- [laughs] Here, come help me hang this.

Here, baby.

So, do you think there will be any boys tonight?

- It's a sorority.

There are no boys.

Then what is the point?

- Point is...

- The point is.

- Being up Pi Ep is not just about your time here

at the university.

It is a way of life.

No man shall ever fulfill the needs of a sister.

No man shall ever fill the void of a sister.

- No man shall fill my void.

- Then what's the point?

- I know, right?

- For a Pi Ep has no void to fill.

- Don't get near my void.

[girls chuckling]

- Something funny, ladies?

- No ma'am.

- Then why are you laughing, bitch?

- Language.

I won't have that kind of language in my house, please.

You know that.

- But Auntie Snake, these two were being insolent towards-

- I know what was going on.

Auntie knows everything.

- They need to learn obedience.

- Are these two young ladies Pi Ep Delta sisters yet?

- No, Auntie.

- Then they're off the hook.

- You can't just let them get away with every little thing.

It'll be anarchy! - Tiffany.

- Yes?

- Shut up.

[girls giggling]

[Tiffany scoffs]

- Can I speak with you in private?

- Of course.

- You scrubs are dismissed.

Go clean yourselves up, look your best,

and please, pretend to be perfect little pledges.

- Yes ma'am.

Come on.

Sorority sisters!

- [Auntie Snake] What's eating you?

- Nothing.

I mean everything.

This house, it's pathetic.

- I don't know, it's a little run down,

but still has its charm.

- Not the house house, the sorority.

It's, it's lame.

- It sure is.

What I mean is, Pi Delta have always been

the stink end of the sorority stick.

Ingrates, degenerates, outcasts.

Filled with bad grades and easy, fast girls.

And God, I miss those days.

- Excuse me?

The legacy of the Pi Delts is rife with...

Okay, well, oh no, maybe we are degenerates.

Is that what people think of us?

- In our day, we wore it like a badge of honor.

Our walks of shame were legendary.

- So this is why we have fewer pledges every year?

- How many pledges do you have this year?

- Including Ginger and Devin?

- [Auntie Snake] Mmhm.

- Two.

- I like them.

- Yeah.

- Those girls have spark.

Those are the types that are gonna bring in more girls.

- [nervous chuckling] Well, if they don't,

we might lose our house and our sorority standing.

We can't afford to pay dues without them.

- You know, our lack of pledges goes way deeper

than our reputation.

The real reason girls don't pledge here anymore is...

the house has a curse on it.

- [scoffs] Here we go again.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

One pledge night your sister, Spider,

accidentally unleashed something evil.

Get real.

What parents named their daughter Spider and Snake?

- We were conceived at a petting zoo.

Anyway, that's all true.

My sister's a lifelong criminal, but she wasn't a liar.

[birds chirping]

[eerie synth music]

It was a dark and stormy night.

- [Sarah] Was it?

- [Auntie Snake] Okay, it wasn't stormy.

It was dark.

They were just three young super hot girls.

Oh look, there's Spider.

Hey, sis.

That one was Taffy, and there's Lisa.

- Lisa and Taffy, gonna break into the bowling alley

at the mall tonight.

Bring me back some kind of souvenir

as proof that you were there.

- Please, we have to pass this initiation.

Oh, please?

- I don't know.

- We'll do it.

- Good, then it's set.

You'll break into the bowling alley.

You'll bring back a trophy here

and then you'll be part of the sorority.

- [Auntie Snake] That's how they ended up

at the bowling alley.

It was some kind of initiation prank.

I never got all the details of what happened,

other than whatever it was that was released,

caused a night of terror.

My sister was the only one who made it out

of that bowling alley alive.

Lisa and Taffy never even got to see their boobs drop.

- [Sarah] Tons of holes in that story.

What happened to Spider?

- You know the license plate on your car?

Let's just say she made that.

- She became an artist?

- Yeah, she went nuts and became

a career criminal, you idiot.

After I saw what she'd become,

I vowed I would dedicate my life to protecting girls,

like you ungrateful wretches.

- Great story.

Let me guess, you found the key to the liquor cabinet.

- I give up.

[upbeat dance music]

♪ I've been watching you

♪ I, I, I've been watching you

- Gosh, I really hope tonight goes well.

- What could go wrong?

- I don't know, like, if we put in all this work

and they don't even choose us?

- They have to choose us.

We're the only two.

You sit here and worry, I'm gonna go wash off all that dust.

- Oh, you got a little right here. [laughs]

[energetic music]

- Go, go! - There's a spider!

[energetic music continues]

- Holy crud, the pledges are top notch this year!

- I just wish there were more of them.

- You wouldn't know what to do with any of them anyways.

- You're a bonafide genius.

- Show me the monkey.

Move that POV, bro.

[energetic music continues]

- Come here, Mr. Cuddles. [smooches]

- These chicks are full on free spirits.

- This is your greatest work yet, bro.

- I consider this charity work.

I do it for free, 'cause it's for the people.

- Hold up, here she comes.

- Who's your little friend?

- It's Mr. Cuddles, and he wuvs you.

And I wuv Mr. Cuddles right back. [smooches]

- It's all happening tonight!

- [Dinger] Work it, baby!

- Who is that?

- We're busted.

- Evasive maneuvers.

- Huh?

- Hide!

[light music]

- Attention, slobs.

- Five minutes until the ceremony.

- We'll be there.

- You better be, otherwise it's [clears throat].

You heard her, tick tock.

[girls giggling]

- Help me get into my gown.

- Crisis averted.

- That was close.

- Oh, guys, guys.

[upbeat rock music]

Dibs!

- Hell no, bro.

- I called it.

[upbeat rock music continues]

- Now we can't see anything.

- Maybe it's a sign that what we are doing here

is completely wrong.

- [All] Nah.

- We gotta move that camera back into a position, bro.

- What fool's stupid enough to climb up there and do that?

Why are you looking at me?

[light music]

- I can't believe there are only two of us pledges tonight.

- Three.

- Wait, where do you come from?

- The streets, what's it to you?

- I haven't seen you around.

Um, do you go to this school?

- School of hard knocks, you know?

- I guess that's a private school.

- Well, I'm Ginger.

- And I'm Devin.

- Okay.

- Bitsy.

- Bitsy?

Interesting name.

- Yeah well, Devin isn't.

It sounds like a dude.

- Oh, it can go both ways.

- No one cares.

[dramatic music]

- The ceremony hath begun.

[cymbal crashes]

- So sorry, Sarah.

I mean, Madam.

- You two low lifes before me have chosen-

- Um, Sarah? [clears throat]

Madam, there's three of them now.

They're multiplying.

- Holy shit, there are three of you, huh.

[clears throat] You three low lifes

before me have chosen the esteemed Pi Epsilon Delta

sorority sisterhood as your forever home.

But has the Pi Delta sisterhood chosen you?

Are you worthy to wear the badge of solidarity?

To forever pursue enlightenment through partnership

with your fellow sisters?

- Yes.

- That was rhetorical, low life.

- Oh, I'm sorry, but I will, for the record.

- Silence.

- Are you worthy of adorning yourselves

in our Pi Delt letters to wear them with courage?

Are you ready to spit in the eye of mediocrity?

And will you never get behind on your dues?

That is where I would like a response.

- Oh, oh, oh, sure.

- Yes, totally.

- Speak.

- Hm, good enough for me.

You are no longer sleazoids and low lifes.

You are now members, nay, family, of the sisterhood.

Welcome to Pi Epsilon Delta.

- Yay! [giggles] - Radical.

- Um, Sarah.

I mean, well, princess.

There's still a lot more in the ceremony.

- Mm, who cares?

- Huh?

- I needed to get them on board before they fell asleep.

- Okay, but in accordance to the bylaws

set forth by the elders-

- Screw the elders, Tiffany. [chuckles]

- Okay, but what about all this?

It's my favorite part.

- Sisters, since we now have a vote,

who would like some of this?

- You get near me with that thing, you'll be eating it.

- Anyone interested in this?

- That looks kinda ouchie.

- Any problems or allergies with these?

- I'm cool.

- No problem.

[upbeat music]

[girls exclaiming and laughing]

[whipped cream hissing]

- Turkey's really missing this.

- Almost there?

[upbeat music continues]

[girls exclaiming]

[Auntie Snake clears throat]

- All right, ladies.

Pledge night is not over yet.

There is one final task that you need to do,

so go on upstairs and get cleaned up, hustle.

- [Auntie Snake] Final task?

There hasn't been a final task in years.

- With all due respect,

take a chill pill, or a bottle in your case.

- You're so dead later.

Not your thing?

- Hardly.

- I don't blame you.

Never hurts to cut loose now and then.

- You don't know me.

- Auntie Snake.

Now you know me.

- What kind of name is Snake?

- A damn cool one.

And you are?

- Bitsy.

- You're making fun of my name?

- It's a nickname given to me as a baby.

Whenever I was dropped off at the orphanage.

I kind of showed up on a rainy night.

You know, like I went down a water spout.

[poignant music]

What are you doing?

- Sorry, you had whipped cream in your hair.

[eclectic music]

[shoes squeaking]

[girls chattering indistinctly]

[Turkey crashes into bushes]

- Pi Epsilon Delta!

[Turkey yells]

- Did you guys hear that?

- Look, I'm not the one for handouts, buts-

- You can se the shower.

- Hm, double the bubbles?

- I suppose.

Keep your hands to yourself.

[relaxing jazz music]

- Bro, did you fix the camera?

- Bro, we're gonna miss the best part.

- Want me to share one?

Here you go.

We're Pi Eps!

- I cant believe it.

Look at the little bubble, boop!

[girls laughing]

[girls exclaiming]

Yeah, soap me up!

[tense music]

- You didn't inform me of me of the final task.

- Oh, it's nothing.

It's, it's just a little debauchery in the bowling alley.

- The bowling alley?

That place is off limits.

- It's tradition.

- It was one time and we know how that turned out.

- Do we?

That is why the sorority is failing.

There's a lack of tradition of what once

used to be a great organization for girls.

This will be a bonding experience.

- You better hope that Auntie Snake doesn't find out.

- Who cares? [chuckles]

- What do you think this task is all about tonight?

- Deathly boring, most likely.

- I want you downstairs and ready in five minutes.

Chop chop.

- We're missing it!

- You want me to kill myself over this?

- Give me that.

- Which one of you did this?

Was it you?

- I would never do something like that.

- You?

- It wasn't little old me.

- Then it had to have been you.

- You guys, why does this have a blinking eye?

- Busted.

- You think they nailed us?

- Never.

- I think they nailed us.

- We'd love to stay and chat, ladies,

but we were just passing by.

- Just happened to be in the neighborhood, huh?

- Yes, but not yours.

We were nowhere near this place, bro.

- Watching a little movie, were we?

- Movies?

Who has the time?

- No tea for me, thanks.

- So you'll have no problem when the police arrive.

- You called the po po?

- Oh no, no.

- Crapola.

- Look, busters, we're onto you pervs.

That was a strict violation of our personal privacy.

That was a severe offense in the eyes of the law.

- Punishable by death, fuckers.

- Please no, my mom will kill my dead body

if she finds out about this.

- Well, maybe there's a way out.

- We'll do anything.

- Anything.

- What do we say, sisters?

We give these numbskulls a chance to redeem themselves?

- I say we paddle their asses till they cry

like little girls.

[boys laughing]

- Harsh, but negotiable.

- Just tell us what we need to do.

- You Neanderthals have a car?

- We got wheels.

- The three of you are gonna drive us somewhere.

- You kicking in for gas?

- After we kick in your ass.

- Okay, easy.

Just tell us where we need to go.

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music continues]

- Bowling, now?

- It's closed, you fool.

- Well, it won't be very fun, then.

- What's the task?

- I like you.

You get down to the bottom line.

- I like her bottom line.

Just sayin'.

- You all know the sordid history

of the Pi Epsilon Delta sorority.

The thievery, the unsolved murders of our legacy sisters.

All of that started right here.

This bowling alley is ground zero for all those years

of talking about us behind our backs,

phony baloney curses, and body count bullshit.

All of that ends tonight.

- Piss on those curses and baloney.

- A Pi Epsilon Delta never wavers,

never shies from adversity and never gives up.

- Never, ever.

- Your task is the very same one given to those sisters

all those years ago.

Steal the trophy,

bring it back to the the house, and with it,

bring back glory to the Pi Epsilon Delta Sorority.

- Yes! [claps]

- [Sarah] Come on girls, let's go.

Shit, I didn't count on that.

[light music]

Did you learn that in juvie?

[Bitsy exclaims mockingly]

- You coming with?

- No, we're staying out here.

This is your task.

- Suit yourself.

- Bro.

- It's a paradise.

- It's perfect.

- Where's the trophy?

Let's nab it and get the fuck outta here.

- Yes, of course my fine lady.

But first?

- We have some fun.

- Tonight, ladies and gentlemen,

- [Guys] We bowl.

- I won't try nothing.

- Well, you might regret it if you don't. [giggles]

- Ugh, get real.

[energetic dance music]

[bottles clinking]

[girls laughing]

[energetic dance music continues]

[girls laughing]

[pins clattering]

[girls laughing]

[energetic dance music continues]

[pins clattering]

- They could be in there all night.

Are we just gonna wait out here?

- Not even.

- We're going back to the house?

- We're going inside.

I had the boys from Sig Ep rig the place.

- Sweetness!

- Come on.

[Tiffany squeals]

We need to be quiet.

- What are you, my chaperone?

- People call me Turkey.

- I'll bet they do.

- You need a brewski to wash that down?

- Brewski?

Are you serious?

- I think I'm in love.

[light music]

[cash register chimes]

Right on.

- Hey.

Wanna knock the dust off some balls?

- Excuse me?

[laughs nervously] I don't know.

I haven't done it since I was a kid.

- You can't be worse than me.

Come on.

Just take the ball lightly, but firm.

Here, take a few steps back.

- Like this?

- Just like that, good form.

- What's next?

- Then you walk real fast and funny to the line.

Throw that thing as far as you can, down the lane.

- Fast and funny, huh?

- Hey, it's a guaranteed strike every time.

- Well then, here goes nothing.

Your instructions kind of suck.

- Well, you weren't fast or funny enough.

- 10 points for form,

but uh, you've never really bowled before, have you?

- Negative, not once.

- Now watch this.

[intense music]

[pins clattering]

- Okay, bro, you're a hustler.

- Now let me show you how to do it.

- Stand up straight.

A little to the left, and hold it like this.

[pins clattering]

- Hey, I'm a quick learner, huh?

- Totally teachable.

[soft music]

- Something bothering you?

- Duh.

- Duh, what?

- Obviously, I'm still mad at you.

- I said I was sorry.

- Yeah, but what you guys said was really crummy,

and you're only sorry 'cause it got busted.

- It was just a college prank.

- Well, it wasn't cool and I did not like it at all.

- Just tell me what I can do to make it up to you.

- Probably nothing.

- I know, they say the way to a woman's heart,

is a brand new pair of shoes.

But wait, there's more.

[upbeat music]

[Ginger giggles]

I truly am sorry.

Apology accepted?

- None of these shoes are even my size.

- Oh, gimme a break.

I'm sorry,

I'm sorry, I'm sorry - Okay, I accept, I accept,

I accept, I accept, I accept! [giggles]

Accepted!

- What a bunch of boring hoes.

- I don't know, I'm kind of liking it.

Then again-

- They haven't even looked for the trophy yet.

If this doesn't pick up,

we may have to goose them a little.

- All right, ladies.

Where are they?

- Why those little bitches.

[Ginger giggles]

- Don't you get near me.

- Your mouth says no, but your body says all kinds of yes.

- Be careful, big boy.

My daddy's in the NRA.

- Oh, no need.

I'll be a gentleman and be on the right side

of your mixed signals.

So is that a yes, then?

- Not exactly.

I, I shouldn't.

- Neither should I.

- What are you gonna do with that, call your mommy?

[machine vibrates]

- How does this look?

- It looks great from here.

- Hmm.

- No, nope.

You'll do.

- Are you really gonna do this for your sisters?

I didn't think that was your style.

- I only look out for a number one.

- I don't get it.

- And you never will.

- If you hate Pi Epsilon Delta so much, why'd you even join?

- The only scholarship I could score hench on.

That, and I'm clearly a masochist.

You think that thing is real silver?

- Hard to tell with all the dust.

- Heavy.

I wonder what the going price of silver is nowadays.

Here we go, hurry.

Let's go, chop chop.

[light music]

- [Ginger] You found it!

- Dude, get your own, I'm outta here.

Let go, let go!

[girls grunting]

[Ginger yelps]

[Bitzy exclaims]

[trophy crashes]

- What, you lose!

[Ginger yells]

- Uh, bro?

[mist hissing]

- What- - The-

- Fuck?

[mist hisses]

- Free at last!

Sultan Almighty, I'm free at last!

Ha ha!

- The hell is that?

- Hold up, hold up, hold up.

Before I take any questions, y'all.

- Okay.

- Is he a Sig Ep?

- No idea.

- Didn't you set this up? - Shh!

- Satan alive.

Feels good to stretch these old bones again.

You got any idea how long I've been crammed in that vessel?

- Um, no.

- Too goddamned long, that's how long.

- Yeah, that's pretty long, man.

[mist hisses]

- Oh my God, about time.

- Totally.

How long have we been in there?

- I don't know, but I've got a hell of a Charlie horse.

- Whatever, look at my hair.

So flat!

- But the important thing is that we're free, right?

- Not with this hair.

Look for some spray, will ya?

- Oh no, did the other imp get out, too?

- Ah, Junior, yeah.

He's over there talking to some dopey kids.

- Oh, here we go again.

[eclectic music]

Look at them.

Did we ever look that goofy?

- As if.

- What are you?

- Listen up, here's the 411.

- Imp-splaining.

- I'm an imp, an ancient forged from magic and shit.

My kind roamed the Earth for thousands of years,

until one day, we didn't.

I'm the last my kind, 'cause, well,

that's another story of another time.

I got trapped in that vessel with-

- The trophy?

- Don't interrupt!

I spent the last 30 years in that trophy

when I went to look at my father.

You know what I'm saying?

- Do we?

- It doesn't matter nohow, because here I am.

And that's all because of you.

And for breaking me outta that hellish imprisonment,

I will reward you greatly.

- Don't listen to 'em, kids.

- You mean like wishes?

- They're listening to him.

- Yes, wishes, as you call them.

Well bitches, looks, whatever your heart desires most,

you name it, girl, I will make it so.

- So, you're like a genie?

- A genie, how dare you?

Do I look like I need a carpet to fly?

No, baby, I'm an imp.

Did you really expect a genie

to come out that bowling trophy?

- Okay, what about these wishes?

- One each, I'll allow you.

Make 'em good, make 'em count.

- I don't know, guys.

This sounds like a recipe for disaster.

- How about you, big guy?

What you want?

Cars, money?

Girls?

Mm. [giggles]

- I wanna be a famous rapper.

- Really?

You don't even rap.

- That's all I can think of.

- Your wish is granted.

[sparkles chiming]

- So disappointed.

- [Imp] Who's next?

- I wish for the perfect man.

Not too tall, not too short.

Doesn't talk a lot and will love me forever.

You know, someone who will be really into me.

Someone I can become one with.

- Hey, what about me?

- Yeah, you ain't it.

- The man of your dreams is just behind that door.

[sparkles crackling]

Go to it and find the stud of your dreams.

Another satisfied customer.

What about you, fella?

Come on, I ain't got all night.

- I'm good.

- And you, little lady?

What's missing in your life?

How can I feel the void in your heart?

- Uh...

- Say it, I will make it so.

- I-I-I wish for-

- Bro, I know.

I wanna shit ton of cash.

Yeah, that's it.

Cash out the ass.

- You snooze, you lose, girl.

Sir, I like your style, granted!

- Bro, what is this?

I specifically said I wanted a shit ton.

This isn't a shit ton, bro.

- Come to me, Devin.

Come inside.

- Is that really you?

The man of my dreams?

- Come to me, Devin.

I waited all my life for you.

I'll never leave you.

[Devin sighs]

- You're off to a good start.

[sighs] Whoa.

- Am I what you dreamed of?

- [chuckles] And then some.

[romantic music]

[romantic music continues]

[sparkles chiming]

- Yo, come on, Imp!

I said I wanna be a famous rapper.

Where's my mic?

- Oh, it's coming.

- What's this?

[upbeat music]

[Bart yells]

[explosions booming]

[imp laughs]

[Bart screams]

- You said you wanted to be a famous wrapper.

Take that, KitKat.

[imp laughs]

All right, who's next?

- You mean next to die?

You can all stay if you want, but I'm outta here.

- Um, we need to get Devin first, though.

- Don't leave now, you'll miss all the fun.

- Fun, my ass.

Where's my wish, bro?

- [Bitsy] Coming with us?

- Not till I get what I deserve.

- Oh, you'll get what's coming to you, ha!

[stomach rumbles] [fart squelches]

[Dinger groans]

[fart squelches]

- Bro!

[fart reverberates]

[upbeat music]

[Dinger groans] [fart rumbles]

[money rustles]

[fart squelches]

[Dinger moans]

- How's that for "Lifestyles of the Rich and Fame-Ass?"

[imp laughs]

- I think I've seen enough, you?

- Way enough.

- We should just run back to the house

and pretend that this never happened.

Solid?

- Way solid.

- Let's book.

- Am I everything you wished for?

[intense music]

- Will you be into me forever?

- Of course.

- And we'll always be one.

- Your wish is my command.

[electricity buzzes]

- Oh my God.

What's happened to me?

I'm like totally obese.

[imp laughs]

[Ginger screams]

[electricity buzzes]

- It won't budge.

- Ah, two more fine young ladies.

Two more wishes.

What are your heart's desires?

- I wish you would leave me alone.

- Done and done. [laughs]

[Tiffany yells]

[groovy music]

- Crap, gag me with a spatula.

[imp laughs]

- I'm waiting.

- I'm not playing your game.

- Ah, but you must.

But word to the wise, choose your words wisely, ha!

- Gotcha.

All right, okay.

If I wished, for example, and I'm not,

for you to open this door,

it would smash me to bits, right?

- Possibly.

- Okay.

And again, if I wished, and I'm not,

to be snuggled up safely in my bed,

I would be, but it would be on Saturn or something, right?

- You're very quick and very imaginative.

- Cool beans. Okay, let me think.

- What have you always wanted?

- To live forever.

- Thy will be done. [laughs]

- Wait, that doesn't count, does it?

- It sure does.

- [gasps] You are a nasty little shit!

- Go enjoy your life.

Your extremely, very long life.

[upbeat rock music]

[imp laughs]

- Where's Devin?

- I dunno, she's like, I'm really into that guy right now.

- We need to find a weapon.

- Do you think that'll do us any good?

- I don't wanna find out if we don't.

- Okay.

- Uh, I'm good, let's boogie.

- [Sarah] You guys!

[Bitsy yells]

- Strike, y-y-you killed her!

[Bitzy exclaims]

- Great, now I'll never be Pi Epsilon Deltas.

- Seriously, Ginger?

[dramatic music]

- Oh mother of God.

Get away from me!

[Sarah moaning]

- Let's go.

[electricity buzzing]

- [Bitsy] We can blow up this thing.

- How are we gonna get out?

- We have to stop him.

But how?

- I swear over my dead body

that I'm never pledging another sorority again.

Worst than prom!

[Sarah growls and laughs]

[nails screeching]

- Occu-potty.

[Sarah growls]

- Pledge revoked.

- Dude, this sucks.

I didn't even wish for anything,

and your wish screws me over?

[Ginger screams]

[water splashes]

- What's taking her so long?

- From my experience with women?

It'll be another hour, at least.

Let's hurry things up.

[dramatic music]

- Hurry up.

Don't make us go in there.

- I kinda wanna see it, though.

Is it really as huge magical as they say?

- Be my guest.

- Not a magic place, not a magic place.

Ooh, check it out.

- Ew.

[dramatic music continues]

- In here.

- Do you like it?

He's like so into me.

- Where's your esteem, girl?

[dramatic music continues]

- Is anything gonna help anyway?

- Oh, that's positive.

I guess we could just sit here and wait for the inevitable.

[Sarah growls]

- I can smell you, pledge! [laughs]

- And that is the inevitable.

- I gotta tell you something.

I really like you.

- And you're compelled to tell me this now?

- I just needed to say it.

I may never get another chance.

I like you, your style.

I think you're cool.

- Thanks.

- Okay, when the imp asked us for our wishes,

our deepest desires,

I-I wanted to wish for you to be in love with me.

But I didn't.

I, I, I couldn't, 'cause I would've known

our relationship would've always been fake.

A foundation built on falsehood.

And honestly, I couldn't always love you knowing that.

Whoa.

- [Sarah] Open up!

[Sarah banging on door]

- In your head, did you wish for anything?

- No.

- We're gonna die in here anyway.

Just tell me.

- Okay, fine.

But don't tell anyone.

I'm an orphan.

I bounce from one home to another,

got kicked out from one home to another.

I never knew who my real mother was.

Even now, especially now, someone worries about me.

Somebody, somewhere who loves me no matter what.

[Sarah laughs]

- I wish for my mom.

- Yummy, nummy! [laughs]

[brain splatters]

[Bitsy gasps]

[somber music]

- You called?

- What?

- You called, I came.

- You're my mother?

- Duh.

- You look exactly like your father, but you act the same,

have the same shitty attitude.

Connect the dots, girl.

- Both are pretty caustic.

- Let's go.

- Both of you, let's go.

[tense music]

[neon lights buzzing]

- But how do we get outta here?

- We're gonna have to put that imp bastard

back in his bottle.

- Fat chance.

- You're not the same ugly jerk that killed our girls.

Who are you?

- Aw, she never forgot us.

- So sweet.

- Ah, your sister killed my father.

Feeling you will be extra delish.

- You aren't killing any more people tonight.

[shotgun cocks]

Or ever again.

- I set out to avenge my father's death,

but got imprisoned in that vessel for over 30 years

with those chatty Cathys instead.

- Cathy and Lisa?

You, you've seen them?

- Every single day.

Those bitches never shut up.

- That's them.

- Fate worse than any death I can bring on your head.

I'm a sporting imp.

Do you prefer to die by any means of a wish

or should not I just kill you know and get it over with?

- What do we do?

- That imp is going back in its trophy.

- The trophy is broken.

- What?

Uh, think, think, think, think, think, think!

Think!

- I remember waking up in class once,

the teacher lady saying something about

saying names having power.

- Right!

Saying it's name gives you power over the evil.

- Well it doesn't get any more farfetched than that,

but go ahead, give it a try, give it a whirl.

Ask him his name.

- Hi, I-I'm Turkey.

What's your name, man?

- Fuck you.

- Beelzebub, Bocephus?

- Do we help them or not?

- Sure, let's let them live their lives.

- Arukalu.

- Nostra-dumbass.

- You'll never get it, suckas.

- I think he's right.

It could be a million years before we even get it.

- Don't worry, I'll kill you long before then.

- Keep trying.

Uh, um, Hearto, um.

Bubblebuns, um?

- Come on.

- A little help, I'm a frickin' ghost.

- We're doing it!

- Yay, us!

- Um.

- What's the use?

No way.

- You were all so mine.

So, so mine.

- Ha-Harold, Harold.

Harold?

- What the actual fuck?

- That's your name, Harold?

- How did you guess, bitch?

No, no, I can't go back!

You girls suck, I'll get you!

I'll get you all!

- Yes!

Oh, that's my girl!

- You did it.

It was your idea.

- Let's get out here.

- What do we do with this?

- Um, put it somewhere where no one can ever find it.

Okay, let's go back to the house.

You have pledges to recruit.

Love you.

- [Both] Bye.

- Oh, that was so great.

- Yeah.

- Well, what now?

- Oh, right.

Hmm.

Well, I guess we haunt the place?

- Yeah, great idea!

[both laughing]

[neon lights buzzing]

[intense music]

- [Sister] Kimmy, you're not supposed to go up there.

- Shh, be quiet.

Where else would it be?

Okay if I were punch bowl,

where would I be?

[gasps] There you are.

Score.

This is going to be a night those girls will never forget.

[bottle shatters]

[imp laughs]

♪ I'm watching you

♪ The way you move your body drives me ♪

♪ Monsieur, ooh la la

♪ You look really good out there ♪

[singing in French]

♪ I got off the plane from Montreal ♪

[singing in French]

♪ I felt like I was sitting on top of the world ♪

♪ Ooh baby, ooh baby, ooh ooh ooh baby ♪

♪ Fashion is my destiny

♪ And now I need someone to please ♪

♪ I'm looking for the special guy ♪

♪ Who will hold me at night and light up my life ♪

♪ 'Cause I been watching you

♪ The way you move your body drives me crazy ♪

♪ I've been watching you

♪ The way you move your body drives me crazy ♪

♪ Ooh, been watching you

♪ The way you move your body drives me ♪

♪ Monsieur, ooh la la

♪ 'Cause I've been watching you ♪

♪ The way you move your body drives me crazy ♪

♪ I've been watching you

♪ The way you move your body drives me crazy ♪

♪ Ohh

♪ I want your body

♪ Ooh

♪ I want your body

♪ I've been watching you

♪ The way you move