Original subtitles

Once upon a time,

there were three beautiful girls.

Oh!

Two of them graduated from the police academy.

The other graduated from a top school for models.

And they each reaped the rewards of their exciting careers.

But I took them away from all that and now they work for me.

My name is Charlie.

Now, Mr. C, if you'll just sign this.

Right... Right there.

Good, thank you.

Now, Mr. C, this is the card you use

if you wish to withdraw cash from your account

with our automatic teller device out on the street.

You may withdraw up to $100.

Would you like me to show you how it works?

Not necessary.

Well...

If you have any problems, you just feel free to call me, okay?

I am most grateful.

Angels, I'm afraid we're facing a rather mind-boggling situation.

Twelve banks were hit, Charlie?

That's right, Kelly, 12 different banks.

Twelve different depositors

who used their cards to rip off the automatic tellers machine.

And here is a list of the banks and the names of the depositors.

Hmm.

What was the total loss, Charlie?

A little more than a quarter of a million,

about $20, 000 from each bank.

So 12 people were walking around with $20,000 a piece in $100 bills?

Twelve men.

Ismail Stang, Oliver Krupp, Ulysses Smith?

Very international group.

Who's our client on this, Charlie?

The president of one of the banks is a friend of mine,

and he's persuaded the other bank presidents to hire us.

Okay, anybody have any ideas of how to get a handle on this?

Well, there is one common denominator here.

Which is?

That each of the 12 banks installed

the same make and model of automatic teller,

which was the Rancaway's model 541A.

Well, that means that at least one of these 12 men

knew how to jimmy that particular model.

Right.

I'm going to research the Rancaway Corporation

while you four split up,

cover the 12 banks.

You mean hopefully get a description of Sam Prong,

Arville Wilkes, Montgomery Smith...

That is an odd-sounding group.

Odd but clever.

Okay Angels, stay in touch.

Well, what do you say we press on,

meet back here for lunch and compare notes, okay?

- Mmm-hmm. - Okay.

Your depositor, uh, Edward Waters,

can you remember what he looked like?

Hmm... Yes.

Yes, as a matter of fact, I do recall him.

Moderate build, yes.

Oh, about six feet.

Graying hair,

uh, mid 40s.

Rather distinguished looking but odd sort of duck.

You've just described yourself.

Ah, but he was English!

Oh, English! Well, how could you tell?

He spoke very properly, yes.

And he dressed English.

Smoked a pipe.

Yes, wore a plaid coat.

Funny hat.

- Bowler? - I'm afraid I didn't ask him.

No, I mean his hat, was it a bowler hat?

Ah, my, yes, I believe that he did.

Well, uh, thank you very much.

Well, you're quite welcome, I hope I've been helpful.

Yes, so do I.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

You issued the automatic tellers card to a Mr. C?

Yes.

Can you describe Mr. C?

Well, he couldn't hardly...

Couldn't hardly what?

See!

He wore very thick glasses.

Ah, how large a man was he?

Well, it was hard to tell, he was stooped over quite a bit.

- Elderly? - Yes.

With a goatee.

I hope you catch that old fox.

We'll try.

So tell me, Mr. Yamaguchi...

Uh, it is Yagamuchi.

"Yag" before "Mu".

Takeshigi Yagamuchi.

- Right. - Right.

Uh, your depositor, Morales Morales...

Uh, why do you keep repeating yourself?

Well, uh, I'm not repeating myself,

uh, that's his name, you see.

Senor Morales Morales.

Odd name.

Yes.

Do you remember him?

I think I do.

Can you describe him?

Tall.

How tall?

Very tall, six feet.

Do you recall his complexion?

Pale.

Senor Morales Morales was pale?

Perhaps his hat was too big, no sunlight.

He wore a somb... Somb...

Sombrero?

Sombrero.

You are repeating yourself again.

Sorry.

Uh, do you remember anything else about him?

- Mustache. - Ah.

And did he have an accent?

I did not notice.

Yes?

He's here.

For you.

Ah, thank you.

Hello?

Yes.

All right, I'll be right there.

Well, thank you very much.

You've been very helpful, very helpful.

Sorry.

Food's here!

Ah, how'd it go?

Learn anything about our dirty dozen?

- They're an odd group, Bosley. - Very odd.

A most unlikely gang of thieves.

Yeah, well, we just may have a line on their leader.

A fellow by the name of Ted Markham.

Name doesn't ring a bell.

Well, Ted Markham is a computer electronics genius

who, for the past two years,

worked for the Rancaway Corporation.

He designed their automatic teller, the 541A.

So far Mr. Markham hasn't broken the law, Bosley.

He also installed the 541A

in each of the 12 banks that was robbed last night.

Still not against the law.

And this morning, Mr. Markham quit his job at the Rancaway Corporation.

Well, a lot of people quit their jobs, Bos.

Yes, I know, but don't all of these coincidences make you terribly suspicious?

Well, it's suspicious, but hardly a case to take to the District Attorney.

I agree.

But most of these $100 bills have sequential serial numbers.

So the moment that we catch Mr. Markham squandering said bills,

we nail him.

The moment "we" catch?

Well, actually,

Charlie's idea was that just one of you three lovelies would take the assignment.

You mean Mr. Markham should squander some of those bills on one of us?

Mmm-hmm, that's the plan.

Here's a photo of Mr. Markham

that the head of personnel at Rancaway Corporation sent over.

Well now, this case might have possibilities after all.

Mmm, not bad.

- Uh, Bosley? - Mmm?

You can tell Charlie I'll take the assignment.

- Well... - Hey! Wait a minute,

don't we get to vote on this or something?

Well, I vote that, uh, Mr. Markham spends some of those bills on me.

I would say that you two have been out-maneuvered.

You're right, Kelly.

This case has definite possibilities.

Charlie, we've been in front of this apartment for two hours.

So far, Mr. Markham hasn't gotten out to greet the day.

Did Kelly and Julie have any luck?

So far, they can learn nothing about the names on that list.

All 12 depositors have post office boxes for mailing.

- No addresses? - Or phone numbers.

You know, Charlie, it occurs to me...

Wait a minute,

I think Mr. Markham is up and about.

I'll get back to you later.

- If you need any help... - I'll get to you.

You drinking?

Scotch rocks and, uh, whatever the gentleman would like.

The gentleman doesn't drink while he's gambling.

What's your friend got on his wrists?

Any fellow that won't let me buy him a drink is no friend.

Open.

Not me.

- How about you? - I'll open.

- 100. - I'll see it.

Oh.

Everybody's in.

How many?

- Two. - Two for you.

And three for you.

One for you.

I'll take two.

Mmm-hmm.

All right.

I'll stay.

Aces.

Hmm.

Big winner.

You've been staring.

I like your moves.

Let me buy you a drink?

You wouldn't let me buy you one.

Well, I can't keep track of the cards when I drink.

Ruins my concentration.

Give the lady another. I'll, uh, have mineral water.

All right, sir.

Interesting watch.

You noticed?

I noticed you won a lot of money.

What is it, some kind of magic poker machine?

No, it's just a calculator, simple one.

Helps me keep track of the cards, figure percentages.

Hmm, yes, you do seem to know your way around a poker table.

It's one of my interests.

What are your other interests?

Dice, roulette,

pretty ladies...

In that order?

Depends upon the lady.

What about this lady?

Oh, I get the feeling you could be top of the list.

Hmm, it's the only way to fly.

Here you go.

To being top of the list?

Ah, nice grip you got there.

I don't like your watch.

Well, you don't have to wear it.

I don't like people that come to my place and cheat.

Oh, I don't cheat, I'm just very smart.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Now, you let go of my wrist,

or I'll break some of your parts.

- Listen, pal, I think maybe you better leave. - Ah.

I think I just outwore my welcome.

Uh, I think you did.

I didn't get your name.

- Ted Markham. - Kris Munroe.

Hi.

You, uh, think we're about to become an item?

I think we're about to become a statistic if we don't get out of here.

You got a car?

Right there.

My place or yours?

I'll follow you to your house.

How about Vegas?

- Pardon? - Will you follow me to Vegas?

- We could catch a jet from LAX. - Are you kidding?

Oh, I never kid on Wednesdays.

Well, I'll have to stop by my place and get a few things.

Not necessary.

What you need, I'll buy.

I have to warn you, I have very expensive taste.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

My car's over there.

I'll follow you to the airport.

I think you better get in my car, quick.

- Hey, that fellow has a gun. - So do I.

Yeah, so I noticed. Why?

I'll explain later! Get in.

Don't let him get away.

Nice.

Go get the car.

- Uh, I suppose you've noticed they're shooting at us. - Yeah, I noticed.

Now, I must tell you, I get very upset when people shoot at me.

It's worse when they hit you.

You look on the positive side, I like that.

You just answered my question.

- What question? - About why you have a gun.

Because you obviously know how to use one.

- You know something? - What?

You're something else.

Yeah?

You just made top of the list.

Still game for Vegas?

Um, well, whatever's fair.

Definitely top of the list.

Listen, relax, I'm all right.

Yeah, I'm getting the tire fixed right now.

So why were they shooting at you?

They thought Markham was cheating at cards.

- Well, was he? - / don't know.

I do know he's a very clever gambler.

But, Kris, do you have to go to Vegas with Markham?

Why don't you just grab a handful of those $100 bills that he's flashing around

so we can check the serial numbers.

Bosley, I haven't had a chance to grab any of those $100 bills.

Besides, that's called stealing.

That is also called gathering evidence.

If Markham's guilty, it's called gathering evidence.

But if he's innocent, it's called stealing.

Did you come up with anything on his 12 accomplices?

No, we had a handwriting specialist in

to check the signature cards at the banks

and he said that all 12 people had very strange penmanship.

Which could mean maybe they don't exist at all.

What do you mean?

I'm not sure yet, but take a look at this.

At what?

Kris, I'm looking at the first letter of the names on the list of the depositors,

in the order the deposits were made.

And?

Julie, read the letters.

I-O-U-S-0...

M-E-M-O-N-E-Y.

I-O-U...

Some... Some money.

Let me look at that.

IOU some money.

No wonder that handwriting expert was going crazy.

None of those 12 men, including Mr. C, exist.

What? Wait a minute. Twelve people opened accounts.

I don't think so. I think one person, one man,

Mr. Ted Markham opened those accounts.

Disguises? You mean he wore disguises?

Right. A thief with a sense of the absurd.

IOU some money.

Uh, listen, I gotta go.

I'll call you when we get to Vegas.

- Wait a minute, Kris. - I can't. Markham's coming.

I'll get back to you.

Car's ready.

Well, I checked my service, I'm all clear.

Listen, I called the airport and all the flights from Las Vegas are booked.

But we can drive it in five and half hours from here.

You really are anxious to see Vegas.

Oh, there are many things I'm anxious to see.

Vegas is just a necessary stop along the way.

Let's go.

- I'll drive first shift. - Okay.

Well, you were right, they stopped to fix the tire.

That was their second mistake.

Yeah.

What was their first?

Messing around with me and my club.

So now what do we do?

Don't worry, I'll think of something. For now, we just follow them.

Well, I guess you figured out where they're going on this road, huh?

That's right.

Vegas.

Right.

Listen, we could waste them right out here in the desert.

I mean, right now.

Yeah, we could do that.

But on the other hand, if they start hitting one of the casinos

for some big bucks...

Well, I could make myself look real good by tipping off the management.

Get friendly with some of the heavyweights.

Like you always say,

"If you just had friends in Vegas."

Yeah, I wouldn't be running that dump I've been running.

Now we just keep following them and who knows, -

We may turn this into a profit.

Right.

Yeah.

Hi. May I help you?

Hi. We need a room and I need a couple of hours sleep.

Excuse me.

Uh, let's make that rooms.

Two bedroom suite?

Is that S-U-I-T-E or S-W-E-E-T?

Both.

Good. I will need a place to put all those little necessities

that I didn't pack that you are going to buy me.

Oh, right. Toothbrush, toothpaste...

Gowns, furs, diamonds.

Um, you have a suite?

Mmm-hmm. Two bedrooms. $400 a night.

We're in luck. They're having a sale.

You are so fortunate.

Why, it suits you perfectly.

Isn't she fortunate?

Very fortunate.

You know, it'd be a crime if she didn't have it.

A travesty.

Have you got a total?

That's $1,264.50.

Listen, why don't you go to the tables.

I'll take care of all of this,

take everything up to the suite and meet you in about a half an hour.

Okay.

Half an hour.

You know what? I'd like to put this on my credit card.

I don't understand.

The lady wishes to have her own little bankroll for the casino.

Yes?

Exactly.

I understand.

It will take just a few moments to check this out.

All right.

Listen, uh, do you mind if I use your telephone?

Of course not.

Thank you.

Townsend Associates.

- Hi, Bos. - Oh, Kris. Where are you?

Vegas. Grab a pencil, will you? I have some of those serial numbers for you.

Oh, you, uh, you got some of the bills, huh?

Right.

Well, you don't sound too happy about it.

I don't, do 1?

How come?

Well, I don't know. Start writing, will you?

B-2-8...

5-0-5-8-4-9-A.

18.

And six is 22.

Telephone call for Miss Kris Munroe.

Miss Munroe, please pick up the house courtesy phone.

- Would you excuse me a minute? - Sure.

Operator, this is Kris Munroe.

Hi, Bos.

Listen, Kris, those serial numbers you gave me,

I put them into the computer and Markham is our man.

Oh.

I'm kind of sorry to hear that.

I was growing rather fond of Mr. Markham.

I'm not gonna like seeing him go to jail.

Well, you won't see him go to jail,

unless you get him back to California, where they can arrest him.

Bos, he's winning big.

The last thing he's gonna want to do is go back to LA.

Well, then you've gotta think of something to bring him back here,

because the wheels of justice move very slowly.

And if he should leave the country or something, they will never catch him.

Okay. I'll think of something.

Bye.

Unbelievable!

Stay there.

Yes?

There are a couple of men here to see you.

They say it's urgent.

And Steve is calling on line three.

Uh, send them in after this call.

Yes sir.

Okay.

Steve, what's up?

Yeah, listen. Some fellow with a funny wristwatch is hitting us pretty hard.

What do you mean "funny wristwatch"?

I don't know. It... It's some sort of calculator.

Another card counter.

Yeah, probably.

Well, how much is he into us for?

Well, about $300,000.

Three... Well, shut him down! Quick!

Right. Yes, sir.

Twenty one.

Unbelievable.

A little, uh, support.

Uh, ladies and gentlemen,

this table is closed.

- What? - What are you talking about?

Sir, the management thanks you for your patronage.

We want you to use the hotel, rooms, shows, no charge.

But you won't take my action at your tables. Right?

No, sir.

And I doubt if any of the other casinos will either, after we speak to them.

You can't do that.

Sir, we can do anything we want.

Now, as I say, you're welcome to enjoy the other diversions of the hotel.

There's no charge.

Well, that's a rotten deal.

Madam, you have to understand...

Look, don't madam me, big mouth.

And honey, don't let him push you around.

Look, let me handle this, okay?

We can stay here as long as we like and do whatever we like.

Cash him in.

Who are you? Who are you? Wait a minute.

Put me down!

I told you I wanted to handle it.

Well, I wanna go back to LA.

Well, I don't.

I don't think you have much choice.

Here are your winnings.

You can count them on your way out of town.

Well, it's been a little slice of heaven.

You tell Steve the next time he has something urgent to tell me,

to tell me before I lose 300 grand.

300 grand?

They got 300 grand?

They're not gonna have it for long.

Get the car.

Pull in there.

- What? - Over there, at the bank.

How come?

Pull in.

Okay.

I'll be right back.

Oh, boy. Never fails.

Townsend Agency.

Oh, Kris. Where are you?

In front of a bank on the outskirts of Vegas.

Where's Markham?

In the bank with $300,000 he won at the table.

What... Is he depositing it?

Probably.

Are you on your way back to LA?

Yeah.

And he's not suspicious of you?

No.

Where's the first place you think he'll go after you cross the border?

Well, he left his car at that poker parlor in Gardena.

I think he wants to sneak in and get it.

Well, we'll be there waiting with the police.

Right.

You don't sound too thrilled.

No. No, I'm all right.

Um... We should be there about 4:00.

Okay, we'll be waiting.

Okay.

So quiet.

Oh, I've got a lot on my mind.

Yeah, me too.

Have you ever seen the country between Rome and Zurich?

Rome and Zurich?

It's best to go by train.

At least that's what I've been told. I haven't been there.

Yet.

Neither have I.

So what do you think, should we go there first?

- Just like that? - Just like that.

We could take one of those little chalets in the Alps.

Maybe go over to Davos, ski there.

Maybe Kitzbuhel.

You do ski, don't you?

- Mmm. A little. - Well, little's enough.

They tell me half the thrill is the view.

The feeling of freedom.

That's what you were told, huh?

Many times.

So where should we spend the summers?

I don't know.

Come on, think. Your choice.

I have this painting in my house.

It's a Van Gogh.

Reproduction, of course.

It's of this wheat field in Auvers.

I've always wanted to go there.

Auvers is...

Where Van Gogh died.

Do you know the last 70 days of his life

he must have painted over 100 paintings?

No kidding.

It's true.

The man was absolutely driven.

He died so young.

But he saw so much and he... He felt so much.

He cared so deeply.

All my life I've worked with machines.

I'm very good with machines.

I always put what I felt aside.

I waited to have enough money,

so that I'd never have to look at another machine again.

Now I do.

Now, like your friend Van Gogh,

all we have to do is see,

feel and care.

You realize, of course, I am hopelessly mad about you.

I kinda like you, too.

When are we gonna move on 'em?

He must have left his car at my place.

He might just be going back for it.

So we wait till then?

That's right.

Like they say, "Home court advantage."

Okay, will do.

Well, Charlie finally got in touch with the DA

and brought him up to date with what's been going on.

So a warrant has been issued for Markham's arrest

and a patrol car should be here in a few minutes.

None too soon.

Let's get it over with.

Listen, I don't see the two fellows

whose windshield you spidered, but...

Let's not hang around.

- Follow me to my place, okay? - Okay.

Ted, look out!

Bos, tell that patrol car to step on it.

- Okay. - Come on.

Get her! I'll get him.

You stay right there.

Now, if there's enough money in this bag,

maybe I won't bruise you up too much.

Guess where I'm gonna put the next one if you don't drop that gun.

Drop it.

Who the hell are you?

I'm the lady who's gonna blow your socks off

if you don't put that gun down.

Police will be here IN a minute.

- Who called the police? - I did.

Who are you?

John Bosley, Townsend Associates.

Townsend Associates?

They're friends of mine. They're detectives.

We work together.

You're a detective?

I'm sorry.

Well, I always have had a fatal attraction to machines.

"You have the right to remain silent.

"If you give up the right to remain silent,

"anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.

"You have the right to speak with an attorney..."

Officer, uh, you can let him go.

- What? - The charges have been dropped.

- What? - Yeah, that's right.

Seems that just a little while ago, each of the 12 banks

received a transfer of money.

From that bank you stopped at outside of Vegas.

Wait a minute. Say that again, Bos?

He paid the money back.

With interest.

And now the banks don't want to be embarrassed

by any public disclosures of what he did to them

so they're refusing to prosecute.

Incredible as it may seem,

he's a free man.

Oh, by the way, Officer, the DA wants you to call him.

You took the money to bankroll yourself.

What was the name of that place in France you wanted to see again?

Auvers.

Right. Auvers.

I guess it wouldn't be the same if we went there together now, hmm?

I guess not.

Why don't you go there?

I'd love for you to see it.

For both of us.