Original subtitles

I got him scoped. He's in the number three.

Fast bugger. He's in the number two now.

Okay, let's collar him.

Watch out, Ponch, watch out.

Come here.

'Watch yourself, watch yourself.'

'Come on.'

Careful, little one.

'That's a good boy.'

Okay, come on. Come on. Hurry up, come on. Here, boy.

'Okay, hurry over. Come on, come on. Attaboy, come on.'

That's a good boy. Come on. Come on.

'No, no, no! Wait, wait, wait.'

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

'Come on, come on.'

'Attaboy..'

Come here.

I got him. I got him. I got him.

Hey, what was that?

Come on.

Wait, wait.

Now I know why I liked turtles when I was a kid.

Hold it right here a minute, okay?

LA-7-Mary-3

looks like we have a five car 11-82

on Southbound Harbor Freeway at, uh, Vernon off-ramp.

'7-Mary-LA, 10-4 .'

Alright. Now, move out very slowly. Now, be careful.

Look what you did to my fender, man.

Please, fellas, I'm upset enough as it is.

Who's the man said he was upset.

Hey, I'll handle the crash.

You put on your brakes first! It's not my fault.

Okay, gentlemen, let's break it up.

Hey, man, lighten up. Hey.

You back off, Chippie. It's between me and him.

Hey, I said, cool it.

Bring it through. Take it easy.

Did your mouth come with the badge?

Hey, man, don't get thick with me

or you're gonna be kissing the concrete.

Think you can handle a little 11

Lay back, Boots. You're talking to the man.

You got a little problem here, Ponch?

No, there's no problem here. Is that right, Boots?

No, man.

But nobody shuts me down and gets away with it.

You dig?

Look, this could be a real problem for you.

You want to end it here or you wanna take it further?

Listen, did you happen to see what happened, sir?

Well, I came off the freeway and the..

...cars in front were slamming on their brakes for...him.

Hey, oh!

Hey, got you this time.

- Yeah, and a troublemaker.

It's the animal shelter for him.

Uh, wait a minute, Ponch. Look, he-he has a cut paw.

Come here, partner.

We got procedure, partner. The animal shelter.

Some little girl or boy will come along

see the dog, fall in love, and give it a good home.

That's right, but first we take it to the vet.

That way, a healthy dog gets a good home faster.

- Procedure, Jon.

You know how Getraer feels about procedure.

W-wait a minute. You're telling me procedure?

[indistinct chatter on the radio]

There's Baricza. I'll have him take care of it, okay?

Okay, partner. I'll take care of the TC reports.

- Ah, I guess I'm just lucky.

Listen, uh, Bar, would you..

Look at you.

- Bar.

Would you like to do me a favor?

Sure.

Hey, what's that dog doin' here?

'Baker?'

Would you mind coming over here a minute, please?

Since when do you have a dog brought back to headquarters?

Well, uh, see, it's this way, sarge.

I went to the--

No, no.

It's this way.

It's against procedure.

Now, if it was that partner of yours, I could understand.

'But you?'

Listen, the dog cut his paw and needed medical attention.

We got the vet right down the street, so I figured, hey..

...the least we can do is have the little dog's

wound fixed, huh?

Okay. You want to play humanitarian? Fine.

But as soon as that vet is finished with him

you know where he goes.

Oh, you got it, sarge.

Yeah, right.

Sorry, Jon. Here.

He jumped out of the car right in front of Getraer.

That's okay.

You should have listened to your partner..

...partner.

Man, the look on your face when Getraer called you on procedure.

I thought you were gonna pop a vein.

Hey, the kid's not used to it, Ponch. What can I say?

Well, welcome to the club, old buddy.

He's mine, babe!

Not till I'm finished with him.

Hey, pull it over.

Hey, pull it over!

Hey, what's with this guy?

Looks like a freeze up, panic city.

Beautiful. Now what do we do?

'You try to kick it out of gear'

and I'll try to turn off the kill switch.

Jon, look! A jam up.

Clear!

Okay.

Jon, hit the brakes easy now.

Ponch, look out!

Alright, easy now. Let's ease him over.

Okay, I got the stand down. Ease him over.

Okay.

Hey. Snap out of it. It's okay now.

Nobody told me. They should have told me.

It's alright, just relax.

Now, take a deep breath. You'll be alright.

'They should have told me.'

- Hey. - I don't understand.

I practiced for a week.

I thought I was ready for the freeway.

- Come on. - Nobody told me.

Step off, now. Loosen up, come on.

You're alright now.

That's it. Alright. Come on backwards.

You got your, uh, class four license and registration?

Class four, yes. - Alright.

Right here. I've got it.

- Twenty five hundred bucks.

- I'm not sure.

All I-all I remember is I got on the freeway

into all that traffic and then I couldn't think,

I couldn't move.

- It was a bummer.

Oh, yeah. I think so.

Listen, the off-ramp's just up ahead.

You think you can handle it?

Uh. if you like, we'll escort you over.

No, no. I've had it.

- Uh, I'm gonna walk. - Hey, wait a minute.

Hey, you get bucked off a horse, you get back on.

- Now, just go over and-- - No, no way. No.

Huh?

- Home.

What about the bike?

You can have it. I never wanna see it again.

People should've told me.

'No one told me I was gonna do this.'

I'm gonna drive on a freeway.

Take me through all these cars.

Tried to kill me. Never told me.

Baker.

The vet says he's ready to travel.

- Oh, huh, okay, sarge. - Come on.

- Come on, take him.

He's all yours.

Okay, just a minute.

- Come on, Baker. - Okay, okay.

Take him to the shelter where he belongs.

- Nothing, nothing.

And you better go with him, Poncherello

just in case he gets any more of his ideas.

No problem, sarge.

I know it's no problem, Poncherello.

You're on my time for another half-hour.

That's why I said, it's no problem.

- Hey, Boots, that's him. - Yeah.

One more I thing.

Here's the bill from the vet.

Okay, little fella. You comfortable now?

There, that's a good baby, yeah. Feeling a lot better, huh?

Hey, I didn't know you were such a dog lover.

Hey, I'm not. I just wanna help the little guy out, alright?

Yeah, well, it's shelter time.

I'll take care of him on the way home.

Hey, you heard what Getraer said. He said you gotta take--

Hey, hey, hey. I'll take care of it, okay?

Okay.

Ponchereeny, that's the dude I'm gonna put on the shelf.

Yeah.

Okay, get down in there. That's a boy.

You okay?

Hey, Boots. You sure you wanna go through with this?

You want me to pull over and let you off?

- Hey, no. Hey, come on--

Just cool it. Just-just relax, both of ya.

Hey, Boots, which one of 'em's the loudmouth, huh?

The one on the left.

Hey, come on. Step on it, man. We're gonna lose 'em.

Okay, okay.

Okay, I'll catch you later, Ponch.

Hey, look at him.

Hey, there, little fellow. How you doing?

You alright, huh?

I better check this out, just in case.

You wait in here for me, okay?

There you go. Wait here.

Hey, what are you doing, huh?

We're gonna have to come to an understanding

if you're gonna stay around here.

Oh, let's see here.

There we go.

I'll get you out, huh?

Okay, man. Let's get it on.

Hi, Jon. Where'd you get the puppy?

Oh, hey, how you doing?

Real good.

- Mm-hmm.

'See you later.'

Hi, Jon. A new friend?

Huh?

Here we go.

Easy now.

Hey.

Remember, no barking, okay?

Hey, hey, hey.

Come on, come on, come on. No, no, no. No bark, yeah.

Shh! Hey, hey, t-that's a good boy, that's a good boy.

Shh. Shh. Look at me.

There we go now, listen. Here, here, here.

Come on, here. Come on. At least bark to the beat, come on.

Hey, wait. Uh.. A

You want something to eat? Hey, come on.

I got you a little of this.

Here we go-ho-ho-ho! Here. Hey, come on.

Hey, hey, hey. Come on. Come on.

You'll like this, fella, come on.

Come on, there you go.

This kid's alright. Come on, get it, good boy. Good boy.

Come on.

Come on. The kid eats this. Come on. Come on.

Take a little bite.

Alright.

Hey, come on, Boots. That ought to do it.

In a minute, man.

Officer Poochereeny deserves the best.

Yeah, Boots, you gonna fix him up good one.

'Come on, man. Let's split.'

Okay, pal. That's it.

'Six minutes fifty seconds left in the first half..'

Yeah

It's, uh, me, Jon.

Anybody with you?

- No. - Door's open.

'Chased out of the pocket. Throws. Intercepted..'

'No! On third and two you don't pass!'

'Beautiful. Another interception.'

Hey!

'Now, New York will take over, first and ten on the forty..'

Yeah, especially with that cute, little chocolate moustache

that used to be my ding-dong.

'Yeah, but I'll tell you something, Ponch.'

He'll make a good watchdog.

Especially for someone way out here in the boonies.

Hey, he doesn't recognize me. Hi.

Hey, come here, boy. Come on, come on.

Yeah, well, maybe you should put some, uh..

Put your helmet on.

There we go. Come here. Come here, boy. Come on.

- Come here, boy. - Hey.

Hey.

See what did I tell ya, huh? He loves ya.

Oh, I'll tell ya, he'd make a good companion, boy.

Especially for someone.. Look how he kisses you.

You're way out here in the boonies, nobody to talk to.

The cold winter nights, anyway, you think.

And I'll tell you something else.

Girls, oh, do they love him.

- Hey. Hey, Jon. Oh, no. No! - Girls love him!

Stay here, I'll be right back.

Hey, Jon!

That's a 647A, Ponch. Indecent exposure.

You're not gonna get away with this! You hear me?

'...obvious passing situation, back to the ball..'

Hey, how'd it go last night?

- Yeah.

- Okay. - Hey. Listen, I'm sorry--

Hey, hey, partner. No big thing. Don't worry about it. It's okay.

Hey, Ponch. Hey, you're not just saying that, are you?

Nah, don't worry about it, partner. Hi. Hi.

Hey, what is he doing here?

Well, I couldn't leave him locked up all day.

He'd get lonesome.

You know, Getraer is gonna have your head. I mean, he's..

What am I saying? He's gonna have my head too.

Good boy. Good boy. Daddy's back.

Daddy?

Hey, Ponch, you know, you had a good idea.

Why don't we take the dog to the animal shelter?

What you talking about?

You wanted me to take the dog, right?

So I took him. Right, Fido, huh?

Fido?

Well, I had to give him a name.

Oh, yeah, Fido. That's, uh, that's real catchy.

What are you gonna do with Fido

when you're out on the beat every day?

Oh, we figured it out, you see, what we're gonna do is..

Oh!

Get outta here.

Fido, you get in here, huh?

Go over there now. Now, stay there. Stay there.

Fido.

Um. How's it going, sarge?

Very slowly, Poncherello, if you're any indication

You're supposed to be on your beat, remember?

Hey, we were just leaving, right, Jon?

Yeah, right.

Yeah, well, I'm glad to hear it.

Oh, great. Now what are we gonna do?

Hey, don't worry. Baricza will find us.

That's them.

Hey, do we gotta follow 'em so close?

I wanna be there when the bigmouth hits the pavement.

Yeah, me too.

Hey, partner, we got company.

Yeah, same yo-yos as yesterday.

Yeah, and I don't think it's coincidence.

He's gonna get it.

So much for coincidence.

Well, if it isn't Officer Poochereeny.

Small world, eh, officer?

The three of you mind steppin' out of the vehicle, please?

Sure thing.

Right over here.

Let me see your driver's license and registration, please.

Sure thing, man. But I ain't done nothing wrong.

Have I, guys?

Hey, man. We're cool. Right, Boots?

Your driver's license and registration.

Well, Albert, why were you following us?

The name's Boots, man.

Why were you following us?

I don't know what you're talkingabout.

'Oh, Ponch.'

What's the problem, Jon?

Got an illegal headlamp here.

Oh, I see.

Hey, boys, these tires are too wide for these fenders.

How about the exhaust system?

Hey, that's not legal either.

Hey, what are you guys talking about?

Sorry, Albert, but we're gonna have

to write those mechanicals

in the interest of your own safety, of course.

And also in the interest of your own safety

we're gonna have to stop these coincidental chance meetings.

Is that clear?

Pull it over! Right now!

Pull it over!

No, my husband's had a heart attack.

I've gotta get him to the hospital.

Pull it over!

My husband's had a heart attack, I gotta get him to the hospital.

It's alright, ma'am. We'll get an ambulance right away.

No. There's no time.

Fifteen, 7-Mary-3 and 4 in pursuit of a vehicle

with possible heart attack victim.

'Dispatch rescue unit to location'

'estimated to be northbound San Diego Freeway'

one mile north of Victory.

'All units LA, 7-Mary-3 and 4 in..'

'One mile north of Victory. A possible heart attack.'

Pull it over and I mean now!

What is the matter with you?

I told you my husband is having a heart attack.

So get away from me! What are you doing?

Fifteen, 7-Mary-4, a 10-97 on Roscoe at the San Diego.

'7-Mary-4, 10-97 on Roscoe--'

I told you to take your hands off him!

You're gonna kill him!

Full arrest. Let's ease him out.

I've gotta get him to the hospital, please.

Take your hands off of him!

'Oh, no. No.'

One, two, three, four

'five.'

'One, two'

three, four, five.

One, two, three

four, five.

'One, two'

three, four, five.

'Come on, come on.'

I got a little carotid pulse.

Three, four, five.

'Three, four, five.'

- 'One, two.' - Oh.

- Three, four, five.

He's cyanotic but we've raised a pulse.

'Okay, we got it. I'll take him.'

'SC General, this is Squad 508.'

'We have a man in respiratory arrest.'

I want your names and I want your badge numbers.

- Look, ma'am-- - Don't you "ma'am" me!

I have every right to report you after jeopardizing

my husband's life, now get them.

Listen, ma'am, in all due respect to you

the way you were driving you were jeopardizing

not only your own life, your husband's life

and everybody else around you.

I had to get my husband to Valley Presbyterian Hospital.

What is the matter with you?

You should really be glad we stopped you, ma'am.

Why?

Well, because you took the wrong off-ramp.

Valley Presbyterian Hospital is near Sherman Way.

Oh, God.

It's alright.

I mean, I'm very, very sorry. I'm just..

- Crazy. - It's alright.

Those gentlemen will take care of your husband, okay?

- Thank you. - Excuse us.

Thank you, officers. I'm really..

Is everything alright?

Yeah, it's a code four, bear.

Hey, uh, guys, there's a little matter I wanna discuss with you.

- Yeah. With ears and a tail.

I told you he'd find us.

'Hey, Fido!'

'Good boy, good boy. That's a boy.'

' - Yeah.

I'd like to see the officer in charge. It's real important.

May I ask what this pertains to?

Hey, come on, man. I gotta see the guy in charge.

Okay.

- Uh, yeah.

This young man, uh, would like to speak to you.

Alright. Wanna sit down?

- My name's Zero.

I mean, Denton. Oswald Denton.

'And, uh..'

I got two friends, Boots and Little John.

And sometimes they do heavy things.

You know what I'm saying?

Excuse me.

Getraer here. Sacramento? Yeah, put him on.

Yeah, captain? Yes, thank you.

'What directive is that, sir?'

You sure Getraer didn't see you put Fido in Judy's camper?

I hope he didn't.

Yeah, well, I pray he didn't.

I'll have it in the mail first thing tonight.

Right, bye.

Ah, okay, uh, now, what were you saying?

Yeah, well, uh, yesterday, Boots got into this wreck

that messed up his wheels, and, uh..

H-he got really burned.

'Attention, all units.'

'LASO reports a 211 armed robbery.'

'Occurred about five ago.'

'Suspect is driving a light blue Plymouth Fury'

'and was last observed traveling westbound on 6th.'

'Suspect is armed and considered dangerous.'

I guess he's picking up the Harbor south.

Yeah. Either that or the Hollywood north.

Let's pull over there and watch.

Yeah. Well, uh, see, Boots got into it

pretty good with your Officer Ponche-Ponchenelly

- 'Ponch--' - Poncherello.

Yeah, that figures.

Anyway..

..Boots..

I mean... he don't like to be put down.

'LA 15 7-David, in pursuit of 211 suspects.'

'Hollywood Freeway northbound from the four level.'

Request units to assist in felony stop.

'All units, LA 7-David is in pursuit, 211 suspect.'

'Northbound, Hollywood Freeway from the four level.'

Hey, here comes the 211 express.

7-Mary-3 and 4 in pursuit of

'211 suspects, Hollywood north.'

He what? He loosened his front hub?

'7-Mary-3 and 4 in pursuit'

'of the 211 vehicle, north on the Hollywood Freeway.'

7-Mary-4, 10-22. This is Getraer.

Cancel the pursuit. Repeat. 10-22. Acknowledge.

7-Mary-4, you are riding a defective motor.

Repeat, your motor is BO. Acknowledge.

LAS four. This is 7-David, I'll stop Ponch.

Ponch, 10-22 immediately. Cancel the pursuit immediately.

Ponch, cancel the pursuit immediately.

LAS four, 7-Mary-4 is pulling over.

Go ahead, central.

'Poncherello, check your front hub.'

'Your bolt's been loosened.'

Hey, man. I was just watching outside that apartment.

I mean, I was holding the bike

but it was Boots who was doing the number.

"Apartment." Frank, it's Baker.

It's his front hub. Stop him. Quick.

10-4!

Jon. Jon, are you alright? Hey, you okay?

Yeah, I think. Here.

Oh, man.

Whoo, that baby just started wobbling

and I didn't know what happened.

I just lost control.

- Well, hey, guys..

I don't think so.

'Attention, all units'

'LASO has 211 suspect in custody.'

'Ventura Freeway and Laurel Canyon.'

Hey, they got 'em!

Now, who's Getraer gonna call a hot dog, huh?

I think I'll let you keep that title, alright?

Alright.

Could you get the DA on the phone for me

so I can file charges against his two buddies?

Baker, Poncherello, you wanna step in my office, please?

Uh-oh.

Uh Oh, Fido.

Now, this gentleman and his son are looking

for their little, uh, gray and white dog.

Said they lost it on the freeway.

Now, they've been over to the animal shelter

and it doesn't seem to be there.

You don't suppose we could help them, could we?

- Yeah, I think we could help.