Original subtitles

Once upon a time,

there were three little girls who went to the police academy,

two in Los Angeles...

the other, in San Francisco,

and they were each assigned very hazardous duties...

but I took them away from all that,

and now they work for me.

My name is Charlie.

All drivers are requested to attend

the pre-start drivers' meeting in one hour.

The, uh, stunt extra, he's not here yet?

Nobody's here. We're closed on Saturday.

That's terrific.

I mean, leave it to a lousy bit player

to louse things up when you're in a hurry,

you know?

What's your name?

Ed Stone.

Ed.

Hey, Ed, your boss,

Mr. Montaigne, he no doubt told you

that I need a few pickup shots for a film I'm doing?

No. No, he didn't.

He didn't call you this morning?

No.

You want to shoot part of a movie here?

Well, I mean, that was the plan.

Look, see, I've got this camera,

and I need a shot of that car speeding up to this gate.

It'll have to be open.

You see, one of the masked men,

he fires his revolver and the guard goes down.

Now, the car comes speeding through,

right up to that building.

Two men get out and run inside.

There ain't nobody gonna run in that building.

It's maximum security.

Nobody gets in there, not even me.

I know, I know.

Your boss, Mr. Montaigne, he explained it to me.

I do a pickup shot of him back at the studio set

going through a door.

Oh, I see.

I've got an idea.

Hey, how would you like to make 200 bucks, fast?

How?

You be the guard.

Me?

Sure.

You can fall down like you're shot,

can't you?

I don't know.

Look, let's call Mr. Montaigne, okay?

I'll explain to him exactly what we want

so you won't get into any problems.

No trouble. Fair enough?

$200.

Sure can't hurt to ask.

Great. Let's call him.

Wait. Don't get near that gate till I turn off the switch.

We'll be up to our necks in alarm systems

and 10,000 volts of electricity.

It'll just take a second.

Sure, sure.

Mr. Montaigne?

Okay!

Camera's running!

Now you see the car.

They're not going to stop now, Ed!

Go for your gun!

Hello?

This is Larry Montaigne.

Hello?

When Larry Montaigne got out to his plant

an hour ago, the maximum security building

had been blown, and two cores of libidrium

had been stolen.

Libid... What did you say, Charlie?

Libidrium, Kelly.

It's a new space age solid fuel

that Montaigne's company has developed,

which he hopes to sell to NASA.

He's due to present it to the Pentagon

in less than a week.

Sounds like pretty exotic stuff, Charlie.

How do you fence something like that?

There's only one way.

You sell it to a foreign power.

And that means whoever stole it

will be taking it out of the country.

Mm-hmm,

which puts us on a very tight schedule.

Charlie, any idea of where we ought to start?

Well, since the guard was killed,

we have no descriptions to go on.

I'd suggest that you go out to the plant.

See if you can find anything.

Has our client alerted the local authorities,

Charlie?

No, Sabrina.

He feels, for security reasons,

his own people

are better equipped to handle this,

for the moment, at least.

They've set up road blocks

and inspection points

around the area, but as yet,

they've come up with nothing.

That's why Montaigne called us.

Listen, Charlie, these two fuel cores of libidrium,

what do they look like?

They're cylindrical, four feet long,

five inches in diameter, yellow in color.

They weigh nearly 300 pounds apiece

and if the outer casing should be cracked,

they are dangerously radioactive.

As you can see, this is a tough one.

I'll stay in constant touch.

Good luck, Angels,

and as the NASA people say,

proceed with extreme caution.

Absolutely.

Well, where does one

start looking for something

when one doesn't know what one is looking for?

Well, maybe somebody dropped something?

Like a nice, easy clue?

Well, let's get going, huh?

Okay. See you later.

Okay.

Could you open that for me, please?

Thank you.

Hey, Bosley.

Bosley, you guys come here a minute.

Come here.

You got something?

I don't know. Look at this.

Now, we got fresh tire tracks, right?

But they're kind of odd.

Now, look how narrow they are.

Look at that.

Looks like from an old car.

Yeah. Very old.

Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute.

Remember just driving up here,

we passed through that little town

about 20 miles back?

Yeah, Termo.

Yeah, but do you remember

there was a sign over the main street?

There was a banner, something about a rally.

Yeah, but an antique car rally.

All drivers are requested to attend

the pre-start drivers' meeting in one hour.

All entrants

who have not received their gas rations,

please proceed to the pit area.

Charlie, hold on just a second.

Bosley's back. Hello.

Hi.

Hi, Bos. Any luck?

Well, some.

Did you get me a present?

Are you kidding?

This is a mold of the tire track

we found at the scene of the robbery.

Now, I took this,

sent it down to a pal of mine

who works at the L.A. police lab.

Yeah?

Well, he's an expert in this kind of stuff,

and he says that this comes from a tire

that would fit on any 1925 to '29 Chevys,

or 1925 to '29 Oldsmobiles, 1926 Fords,

or most of the Cadillacs

made in the late 1920s.

Wow.

Well, I think I've seen cars of that type

since we've been here.

Look, all we have to go on are those cars and this place.

I agree.

Charlie, um...

I think we're going to need a cover.

A very expensive cover.

Okay, now, the number

of the tire we're looking for is 1220 RX.

Right.

Okay, I'll go introduce myself

to the rally director

and establish our cover.

Okay, why don't we meet back at the hotel

in an hour and compare notes?

Okay. Okay.

I wonder what kind of costumes Charlie sent out.

I don't know.

Something appropriate for this old relic, I suppose.

Oh, Bosley.

I don't think you're an old relic... yet.

Very amusing, very amusing.

Well, I'll go find the rally director.

I'm going to try to unwind my body from this car.

Mr. Black, Mr. Black. There's a phone call for you.

Please report to the trailer.

Ladies and gentlemen,

for those of you who wish to purchase refreshments,

there are stands by the library and another one inside.

Drivers, please be certain

your logs are properly filled out

to avoid disqualification when we reach Santa Barbara.

You're the boss man.

And you're...

Kelly Garrett, American Antique Car Magazine.

I've never heard of that one.

Oh, it's new. Daddy just bought it for me.

You wouldn't have heard of it.

Oh, you must be Daddy's girl.

Well, he wants me to learn the value of a dollar.

Let's see.

The last time I checked, it was worth 34 cents.

You sound like an economist or something.

I used to be a financial consultant

for a stock brokerage firm.

Used to be?

I made the mistake

of following my own advice on some stocks.

Fall down and go boom?

I guess you could put it that way.

Okay.

You're smart and you're handsome,

but you're not rich.

Two out of three ain't bad.

But good enough for a pretty like you?

My, my. You are rather direct.

I'm spoiled. I like rich and pretty things.

So do I, actually.

In fact,

I'd like to go along with the group,

do a full-color story on the rally.

Maybe you could help me.

It's worth discussing.

What's in it for me?

Now, that is direct.

Shall we talk about it over coffee?

I thought you were a man with champagne tastes.

Have you checked the price of coffee lately?

I don't believe I have.

All drivers,

be sure you're in your proper costumes

and registered with the starter

one hour prior to departure.

There's a phone call for a Mr. Rich.

Mr. Rich, there is a phone call for you.

What are you doing?

Oh, I'm a magazine writer.

I'm interested in cars that were built in this year.

Look, lady,

we have work to do before the start.

We don't have time to talk. Do you mind?

Hey, whatever's fair.

Excuse me.

Dr. Persarlaff, please go to the starter

and pick up a log sheet.

You into tires, pretty thing?

Oh, no. Magazine writer.

I'm doing an article about the rally.

Well, anything you want to know, all you've got to do is ask.

Joe Marshall.

Hi, Joe. Kris Munroe.

Hey, what he doesn't know

would fill a book.

Anything you want to know

about these sweet, old gems,

talk to me, Todd Hendricks.

Hi. You see that Chevy over there?

What about it?

Do you know those two guys?

No. Why?

Well, see, I have this theory.

I think that the cars people choose

reflect their real personality.

So what kind of personalities drive antique cars?

Hmm. Well, let's see.

They're aggressive, imaginative, punctual,

which kind of reminds me,

do you know what time those guys got here?

Well, we signed in about 10:00 this morning.

They came... a little later.

Thanks.

You're a prince.

Any time, pretty face.

Are you looking for something?

Yeah, well, a story, hopefully.

A story?

Yeah, my name is, uh, uh... Sabrina Duncan.

I'm with a magazine.

We're covering the rally.

You're Mr... Nichols. Carl Nichols.

Mr. Nichols.

Gee, I don't recall seeing you here

this morning.

What time did you get here?

Around 10:00.

Ah, I see.

Well, it's, uh...

Really a beautiful machine.

Could you tell me a little bit about it?

There's nothing particularly unusual about my car.

Really? I thought all these cars were kind of special.

I mean, mine's no more or no less special

than the others.

Ah.

Well, it's really a beauty.

What kind of engine

you got in that thing anyway?

I wasn't going to steal it.

Sorry.

We antique buffs get a little over-protective

sometimes.

There's a lot of money invested, you know?

Hope I didn't bruise anything.

No, no.

I like my hands dirty. They look kind of lived-in.

Just startled me a little bit, that's all.

I'm not into shoving ladies around,

especially pretty ones.

Oh, thank you.

Can I buy you dinner or something,

make up for it?

Uh, maybe later.

Sure.

No hard feelings, huh?

No, no, uh... no hard feelings...

Uh, so long.

All drivers,

be sure you're in your proper costumes

and registered with the starter

one hour prior to departure.

Where do you find parts for these cars?

I don't know.

Lovely, isn't it?

Yes.

Eight cylinders, chrome rings,

advanced spark distributor,

20 amp generator,

updraft carburetor, and...

Would you like a sip?

Oh, thank you.

You, uh, certainly know your cars...

And your wine.

Are you an aficionado?

No, I'm just an admirer of old cars...

and mature women.

If you are attempting to flatter me,

you're doing a divine job.

Would you... join me?

Ah, thank you.

I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I...

I didn't get your name.

Martha.

Martha Milton.

John Bosley.

Do you, uh...

Do you own many of these antiques?

Oh, heavens, no.

I can hardly afford this one.

It... It was my husband's one extravagance.

Oh, are you recently widowed?

I'm just over the pain of it.

Well, you have recovered most charmingly.

Are you, um... attached?

No.

Uh... What time did you arrive?

Just this morning, after breakfast.

Well, to your timely arrival, Miss Milton.

And to yours, Mr. Bosley...

or may I call you John?

John.

I already like the way it trips off your tongue.

Keystone Cops?

Yeah, well,

I always did feel that Charlie had

a somewhat droll sense of humor.

Well, it does fit the car that he sent us.

Too bad they don't fit us.

Okay, look, so much for our cover wardrobe.

Now, what have we got in the way of suspects?

Oh.

I found two cars whose tires fit this mold.

Here, look at this.

The first one is a 1928 Chevy.

Came in sometime before noon.

Two guys working on it,

both very uptight types.

What's with the hurry-up paint job?

Well, that's just it.

That's what I couldn't find out,

and I also couldn't find out their names.

Uh, let's see,

this other one is a 1929 Cadillac.

Couple of fellows

named Marshall and Hendricks.

Seem to be pleasant enough.

They came in about 10:00 this morning.

Okay, I got a '29 Olds

with the same RX-20 tires.

It's owned by a man named Carl Nichols.

He says he came in around 10:00,

and when I tried to look at the engine, he got very upset.

Well, that last one there

is the touring sedan that I found

with the tires on it that we're looking for.

Very elegant car.

Hmm. Elegant lady.

What time did she sign in?

She says shortly after breakfast.

Who is she, Bosley?

Uh... As I recall,

I think her name might be Milton.

Martha Milton, I think.

Bosley? Think? Might?

This is very unpositive detective work.

I should say.

Well, no, as a matter of fact, it definitely is Martha.

She's a very engaging person.

Well, she certainly doesn't look like the type

that would pull off a robbery.

No, I wouldn't spend any more time with her, Bosley.

Nah, nah, forget her.

No.

Anyone this engaging

certainly isn't the criminal type.

Oh, I agree.

She, uh... You must remember, though,

that she could... she could have accomplices.

Hmm. Never thought of that.

Oh, yes, I think

she definitely, uh... deserves further observation.

I think that we should run these cars and their owners

through Charlie's computer

and see what kind of background

we can come up with for her.

Good idea. In the meantime,

I'll check with the rally director again, Jeffers.

He has a list of all the entrants

and the times they signed in.

Whoever pulled off that robbery this morning

couldn't have gotten here much before the noon deadline.

Do you think this Jeffers is gonna let you look at the list?

He's a fellow with money problems.

I might have to grease his palms a little.

Well, if you do, make it cheap grease, will you?

Because the overhead costs of this case

are getting frightfully expensive.

And not terribly tasteful.

You look great.

Look at this.

Drivers, please be sure

your logs are properly filled out

to avoid disqualification when we reach Santa Barbara.

Hi.

Well, the magazine lady.

Do you mind?

I'll even buy you another cup of coffee.

Well, for a man on the brink of bankruptcy,

you do have a generous heart.

Not really.

I just figure if I'm nice to you,

I might find a way to turn a buck.

I might know a way.

You've just captured my interest.

You have the official entry sheet

the contestants sign

when they arrive here and enter the competition.

Yes.

Well, I'd like to see it.

Why?

My seeing it bother you?

No.

I just can't figure out why you'd want to.

Well, I'm a reporter,

and when I write this story,

I'm going to need names, model numbers...

facts in general.

Makes sense, right?

Yeah, I guess so.

How much are you willing to pay?

How much do you want?

How does $1000 sound?

It sounds to me like you think that entry sheet

is more important than it should be.

As a matter of fact,

it has proven to be more valuable

than I would have ever imagined.

Meaning what?

It's a private joke.

I'll give you 500, and that's my best offer.

Okay, you've got a deal. Come on.

This guy, Jeffers, what's he trying to pull?

I don't know.

What did you tell him when we got here?

I told him we wanted to get into the rally.

He told me the deadline to enter was past,

so I gave him 500 bucks.

He said okay,

changed the time on the entry sheet.

You sure he hasn't guessed why we're really here?

What we've got?

He thinks we're a couple of antique car nuts.

Okay, but suppose

that lady reporter starts asking questions.

We haven't got time for questions, Greeves.

We've got millions riding on this.

I know, I know.

So what do we do?

These two could accidentally

blow the whole thing for us.

They can't blow it for us... if they're not breathing.

You mean, uh... kill them?

Slade, we've got no choice.

It's just like you said.

We've got millions riding on this one.

Let's go.

I've got the entrant" sign-up sheets

here in my trailer.

Okay, later for her.

We better get out of here

before we draw a crowd.

I don't know. I didn't get a look at their faces,

but there was definitely two of them.

Are they going to call off the rally?

No. Jeffers has an assistant named Danner,

and he's going to take over for him.

Well, we can be certain about one thing.

Whoever pulled that robbery

is still here at the rally.

The question is, why?

Why are they still hanging around?

Probably because they need a cover.

They've got to figure

that all the roads out of the robbery area

are being watched,

which, as we know, they are.

Now, the cars will get to Santa Barbara

sometime tomorrow.

Santa Barbara's on the coast.

Charlie said they have to get the fuel cores

out of the country.

The cores could be hidden

in one of the cars.

Hey, take a look at these.

These are the entrants' sign-in sheets.

I took them from Jeffers' trailer

right after the sheriff did his preliminary investigation.

You know, I think

that his plan to give them... Or rather sell them to me

is what got him killed.

Yeah, okay. Fine, Charlie.

I'll get back to you.

Well, Charlie finished his computer check

on our suspects.

Anything interesting?

Yes, as a matter of fact.

Your friend Nichols.

He just recently got out of prison,

serving two years for embezzlement.

Well, I guess Mr. Nichols deserves a second look.

Yes, and it holds true

for my lady friend, Martha.

Charlie learned that she is from New York,

and her real name is not Milton.

It is Harriman.

Miss Martha Harriman.

I will, of course,

continue my relationship with Miss Martha Harriman.

Okay.

Kris, while Sabrina and Bosley are doing that,

why don't you and I take Jeffers' sign-in sheets,

talk to some of the other contestants

and see if we can find some discrepancies.

That's a good idea.

Hey, wait a minute.

That rally starts in an hour.

I think we ought to get in our uniforms.

Uh... hello.

Pardon me, sir.

I hear your engine has been stolen.

Ah, well, I see they've put it back.

Fear of the law, no doubt.

That's cute. Very cute.

Yeah.

Well... the old beauty about ready?

Just about.

Think you can win?

I know I can.

And the winner gets how much?

Five thousand.

Hmm.

You could really use the 5000, I guess, huh?

Anybody can use $5000.

Yeah, I guess anybody could use $5000...

or more.

Hey, look.

You know what I've decided to do?

I'm going to center my story on you.

I mean, ex-con trying to make good.

It's a terrific angle and I love it.

How'd you find out about that?

Well, I'm a magazine reporter.

It's my job to know about things like that.

So why pick on me?

I'm not picking on you.

I mean, um...

You're a solid citizen again, right?

You don't have anything to hide, do you?

No.

Well, then you shouldn't mind. I tell you what.

You just get back to work and I won't bother you.

I won't get in your way.

I'll just sort of, um... observe, and, uh...

I won't get in your way. Don't worry.

They've got some terrific costumes here.

Have you ever driven

one of those old babies?

Hi.

Is that you, Kris?

Oh, hi. I hate my hat.

Any luck with that?

Oh, I'm not sure.

You have the first page, right?

Yeah.

Well, I have the second one,

and it picks up all the entrants

and the arrival times

from who came in, oh, after 10:00.

And?

And the first few names and arrival times

have been scratched off.

So?

So look at the first car that was finally entered.

Hendricks and Marshall.

Right, the two sweeties I talked to.

Look at the second name.

Sabrina's uptight ex-con, Mr. Nichols.

So what are you getting at?

Well, maybe the scratched-out area means

that somebody was juggling with the check-in times.

Which couldn't have been done

without Jeffers' knowledge.

Or involvement.

Which may be tied

into Jeffers being killed.

I think I better have a little talk

with Hendricks and Marshall,

then I'll talk to Nichols.

Okay. I'll meet you outside at the refreshment stand

in 30 minutes.

Okay.

Okay.

Let's get some coffee. What do you say?

Okay.

Don't get up.

Oh, you know what?

You're probably wondering why I was looking under there.

Sit down.

I know why you're looking under there.

You're looking for something.

You're a cop.

Did you say cop?

No, no, wait a minute.

You got this all wrong.

This is just for laughs. See?

She and the one who was with Jeffers,

they're working together.

Oh, no, no, no. Wait a minute.

You have this all wrong.

Look, this is just for fun. Watch.

See? It's just a costume.

These aren't costume bullets.

Well, pretty face,

you're just full of surprises.

Sit down.

The entries will now start lining up

for departure to Santa Barbara.

Marshall, Hendricks. 1929 Cadillac.

Theme, bank robbers.

Right.

Who's she?

Well, we had to take a hostage.

Hostage?

When we robbed the bank, we had to take a hostage.

Oh.

She really looks scared.

You people are terrific.

All right. You'll be the fourth car out,

leaving in about... Ten minutes.

All drivers be sure you're in your proper costumes,

and register with the starter one hour prior to departure.

All entrants who have not received their gas rations,

please proceed to the pit area.

Judging from your costume, I would assume

that you're making the trip to Santa Barbara.

Yes, well, that was my intention.

May I also assume that I'll be seeing you there?

Well, there may not be time.

Oh.

John, I have a confession to make.

A confession?

I would not ordinarily be so bold.

Maybe it's the wine, but...

Oh, and the risk of not seeing you again

forces me to speak out.

You see, John, I am not what I appear to be.

Oh?

No, my name is really Harriman,

Martha Harriman.

My husband was Roger Harriman.

I lied to you.

My interest in these antique machines

is at best minimal.

Well...

Then why?

Well, I've attended these functions

in order to meet people such as you.

No, no, more specifically, to meet someone like you.

Like me?

Yes, John, you.

Happily, the name "Roger Harriman"

means nothing to you, so let me explain.

I'm... I'm not a woman of modest means.

In fact, John, I'm loaded.

Oh, well, Martha, I'm afraid I've made an error of judgment.

I would love to continue this conversation,

but I'm afraid that it will have to be in Santa Barbara

tomorrow morning. Oh, but you can...

Meanwhile, there is a pressing matter

that just demands my attention.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Oh...

You children who are playing in the gathering area,

please stay off the cars.

Thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen,

for those of you who wish to purchase refreshments,

there are stands by the library and another one inside.

Kelly, jump in, quick.

Thank you. Bye-bye.

Hey, either of you seen Kris?

No. We thought she was with you.

Well, she was supposed to meet me 10 minutes ago.

Oh, come on, It's almost starting time.

I know. She didn't show. That fellow behind me over there

might have been watching us together.

He's definitely been following me

since Kris and I split.

In the gangster-type costume?

Yeah, that's him.

Listen, Kris thinks she might have found a discrepancy

between the times Hendricks and Marshall arrived here,

and your friend, Mr. Nichols?

Yeah?

She was going to see them.

Okay, let's go talk to Nichols.

They're multiplying.

Mr. Nichols, we need to talk to you.

Sorry, out of time.

Well, you have to make time.

Now, listen... You listen!

We have a friend... She's blonde. Her name is Kris.

She's dressed like we are. Has she been here to see you?

Nobody's been to see me. What the devil's going on?

We're detectives, Mr. Nichols, real detectives,

and our friend might be in real trouble,

so if you've seen her...

This is a put-on, right? Wrong!

Listen, I haven't seen your friend, honest.

Are you sure about that?

You're not hiding anything, right?

Right.

Then why have you been so uptight

ever since I've been here?

You're wasting our time, Mr. Nichols.

Hey, it's no big thing.

I juiced up my compression ratio a little.

Your compression ratio?

Yeah, you know, to give me an edge on the competition.

That's why I didn't want you to look at my engine.

Aha. Well, once a cheater, always a cheater, huh?

I guess I believe you.

Let's go find Marshall and Hendricks.

Hey, Kelly, look.

There's the guy that was following you.

Hey, they've got Kris!

Oh, they're gonna make a run for it.

Come on.

Wait a minute.

We're never going to catch them in this.

Hey, Nichols' car. Come on!

Hey, what are they doing?

You're going out of sequence!

Look out!

Hey, what do you think you're doing?

We're taking your car. You are not taking this car.

Yes, we are. We're taking your car.

I'll make you a deal.

You don't tell anybody what we're doing,

we don't tell anybody what you've been doing.

No way!

Get off the car. Get off the car, dummy!

Stay with them, Bosley.

Go for it, Bos.

Smooth it out, Bosley. You're oversteering.

How are we going to get Kris out of there?

Very carefully,

because that fuel core's probably in the car,

and if it gets crushed or broken, it's radioactive.

Slow down, will you? Let them pull up.

Okay, now.

Will you hold her!

Okay, Bosley, pull up on their left rear fender.

And then what?

That area up there is flat and it's sandy.

You're going to force them off the road.

Okay, okay, okay.

Okay, okay. We give up.

All right, toss the hardware.

Now, nice and easy.

Hold it!

Are you okay?

I'm great.

Oh, good. There.

Will you do me a favor?

Yeah, you name it.

See this lovely hat? Uh-huh.

Can I burn it? Yeah.

I hate this hat.

Well, Angels, the libidrium fuel cores

were returned intact,

and our client is very grateful.

Oh, by the way, exactly how did the rally director, Jeffers,

fit into all this?

Oh, well, our client

had his people guarding all the main roads,

so the thieves needed the cover of the rally

to get the fuel cores to Santa Barbara,

where apparently they had a boat waiting for them.

Trouble was

they got to the rally after the noon deadline.

Ah, so they bribed Jeffers

into changing their sign-in time, huh?

Right, and when Jeffers decided

to let me see the sign-in sheets too, for a price,

they got worried and killed him.

I see.

Well, Angels, another tough job well done.

Thank you, Charlie.

Oh, it was especially tough for Bosley.

For Bosley?

Mm-hmm. He met an elegant widow with a lot of bucks.

And that's a problem?

Well, you see, the problem was

she wanted Bosley to help her spend them.

Yes, and obviously, Charlie, I cannot be a kept man.

Well, naturally, Bosley.

You are a fellow of flawless character.

However, I am not adverse

to helping her spend a few of those bucks

before she goes back home,

and since I do not wish to keep her waiting...

Cheerio.

You are a groovy kind of a guy, you know.

Am I to assume from Bosley's exit

that he has left us to dally

with this elegant lady of means?

Charlie, a little dallying

never hurt a man's character that much.

Oh, I agree, Kelly, I agree.

Come on, Charlie.

Bye.

Charlie agrees.

How unusual.

Most unusual.