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1
00:00:06,624 --> 00:00:08,260
♪ Hey, good morning, baby ♪
2
00:00:09,630 --> 00:00:11,165
♪ You need some java, baby? ♪
3
00:00:12,001 --> 00:00:14,205
♪ We got to wake up, baby ♪
4
00:00:14,205 --> 00:00:16,744
♪ Last night was really crazy ♪
5
00:00:16,744 --> 00:00:18,781
♪ I think I liked it, baby ♪
6
00:00:18,781 --> 00:00:20,752
♪ Damn, you smooth, baby ♪
7
00:00:20,752 --> 00:00:24,425
♪ Looking like
you moisturize, baby ♪
8
00:00:24,425 --> 00:00:27,031
♪ Tell me where
to buy it, baby ♪
9
00:00:27,031 --> 00:00:28,601
♪ I'm dry,
I need the product, baby ♪
10
00:00:29,736 --> 00:00:31,439
♪ Got my hand on navel ♪
11
00:00:31,439 --> 00:00:34,312
♪ Then she
slid her panties to the ankle ♪
12
00:00:34,312 --> 00:00:36,584
♪ Made me back up
and look at the bussy ♪
13
00:00:36,584 --> 00:00:38,386
♪ Bussy glistening
like a heavyweight ♪
14
00:00:39,723 --> 00:00:42,228
♪ You want to fuck me, baby? ♪
15
00:00:42,228 --> 00:00:44,098
♪ Haven't showered
in a minute, girl ♪
16
00:00:44,098 --> 00:00:46,369
♪ But if you with it,
then I'm with it, baby ♪
17
00:00:46,369 --> 00:00:49,275
♪ I will shower you
with every curl ♪
18
00:00:49,275 --> 00:00:51,547
♪ Are you freaky, baby? ♪
19
00:00:51,547 --> 00:00:53,618
♪ Spooning me
like I was soup ♪
20
00:00:53,618 --> 00:00:56,489
♪ Want me to be dirty
like a goose? ♪
21
00:00:56,489 --> 00:00:59,563
♪ Ooh, but what do you like,
baby? ♪
22
00:00:59,563 --> 00:01:02,268
♪ Do you want me
to choke you, baby? ♪
23
00:01:02,268 --> 00:01:04,305
♪ She said,
"That's okay, baby" ♪
24
00:01:04,305 --> 00:01:06,476
♪ "That's okay"
as in you want that? ♪
25
00:01:06,476 --> 00:01:10,083
♪ Or "That's okay"
as in "No, thanks, baby"? ♪
26
00:01:10,083 --> 00:01:12,187
♪ She look at me crazy ♪
27
00:01:12,187 --> 00:01:14,258
♪ I said, I don't mean
to complicate it, no, no ♪
28
00:01:14,258 --> 00:01:16,329
♪ Let me grab a condom, baby ♪
29
00:01:16,329 --> 00:01:18,868
♪ I put it on,
then she, then she ♪
30
00:01:18,868 --> 00:01:21,540
♪ Throws it back,
give me the ass, pop it ♪
31
00:01:21,540 --> 00:01:24,245
♪ Tickle the breast,
nibble the crack, stop it ♪
32
00:01:24,245 --> 00:01:26,215
♪ General Custer,
with the tactics, I'm a demon ♪
33
00:01:26,215 --> 00:01:29,723
♪ I could feel the semen
creeping 'round the penis ♪
34
00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:31,694
♪ Being a man in there ♪
35
00:01:31,694 --> 00:01:34,766
♪ We need a ambulance,
pussy getting killed ♪
36
00:01:34,766 --> 00:01:37,739
♪ She orgasming,
body spasming ♪
37
00:01:37,739 --> 00:01:41,847
♪ Then I finally finish,
can you feel it, baby? ♪
38
00:01:41,847 --> 00:01:43,718
♪ Sliding off,
where's the condom? ♪
39
00:01:43,718 --> 00:01:46,657
♪ Whoa! Well, it's not
on my penis, baby ♪
40
00:01:46,657 --> 00:01:49,295
♪ It's so confusing, baby ♪
41
00:01:49,295 --> 00:01:51,700
♪ Uh, did I-did I just
fuck you raw, baby? ♪
42
00:01:51,700 --> 00:01:53,470
♪ Uh, I'm looking round
and I don't see it, baby ♪
43
00:01:53,470 --> 00:01:55,307
♪ I move the blanket,
move the covers ♪
44
00:01:55,307 --> 00:01:57,211
♪ Where's the rubber, baby? ♪
45
00:01:57,211 --> 00:01:59,415
♪ Now she's digging like
a caveman in her bussy for it ♪
46
00:01:59,415 --> 00:02:01,720
♪ Even if you find it in there,
what's the difference, baby? ♪
47
00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:04,225
♪ Semen probably already leaking
in there, swimming in you ♪
48
00:02:04,225 --> 00:02:05,528
♪ She says she still
don't want no condoms ♪
49
00:02:05,528 --> 00:02:06,764
♪ Sitting in her insides ♪
50
00:02:06,764 --> 00:02:08,534
♪ I said I understand ♪
51
00:02:08,534 --> 00:02:09,803
♪ But there are
bigger fish to fry ♪
52
00:02:09,803 --> 00:02:11,540
♪ She said, "You blaming me" ♪
53
00:02:11,540 --> 00:02:13,611
♪ "But you're the one
who put it on" ♪
54
00:02:13,611 --> 00:02:15,581
♪ I am not blaming you, and I
don't think I put it on wrong ♪
55
00:02:15,581 --> 00:02:17,719
♪ I put it on my pinky first
to see which way it go ♪
56
00:02:17,719 --> 00:02:19,523
♪ Because I'm well aware that
condoms aren't reversible ♪
57
00:02:19,523 --> 00:02:20,825
♪ She screamed,
"I found it, baby!" ♪
58
00:02:20,825 --> 00:02:22,261
♪ She pulled it out her bussy ♪
59
00:02:22,261 --> 00:02:23,531
♪ But I can't celebrate it ♪
60
00:02:23,531 --> 00:02:24,633
♪ 'Cause we got bigger fishy ♪
61
00:02:24,633 --> 00:02:25,935
♪ Girl, I ejaculated ♪
62
00:02:25,935 --> 00:02:27,237
♪ And I don't see it in there ♪
63
00:02:27,237 --> 00:02:28,841
♪ She said it's fine ♪
64
00:02:28,841 --> 00:02:30,645
♪ She'll just take
the morning-after pill ♪
65
00:02:30,645 --> 00:02:32,649
♪ Oh, oh ♪
66
00:02:32,649 --> 00:02:34,485
♪ Thank God for the tech now ♪
67
00:02:34,485 --> 00:02:37,257
♪ We should probably
go and get it now ♪
68
00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:40,631
♪ This is life
when you're young and wild. ♪
69
00:02:40,631 --> 00:02:42,836
Don't worry, it'll be fine.
70
00:02:42,836 --> 00:02:46,510
- Okay. Let's lie down
after all that.
- (sighs)
71
00:02:46,510 --> 00:02:48,681
- Ah. Take the load off.
- (chuckles)
72
00:02:48,681 --> 00:02:51,285
Get in here.
73
00:02:51,285 --> 00:02:53,356
- (shutter clicks)
- Oh.
74
00:02:54,358 --> 00:02:55,928
- Wow. (chuckles)
- Okay.
75
00:02:55,928 --> 00:02:58,199
I fucked Lil Dicky.
76
00:02:58,968 --> 00:03:01,339
(sighs)
77
00:03:04,679 --> 00:03:07,484
♪ ♪
78
00:03:19,509 --> 00:03:21,613
GATA:
I promise you, bro.
You cannot get a STD
79
00:03:21,613 --> 00:03:23,684
going in the pussy raw
for only ten seconds.
80
00:03:23,684 --> 00:03:25,353
Who says it was ten seconds?
81
00:03:25,353 --> 00:03:26,890
It could've been ten,
it could've been 48.
82
00:03:26,890 --> 00:03:28,894
I have no idea.
I fucked the condom off my dick
83
00:03:28,894 --> 00:03:30,631
trying to give her this, like,
rock star style sex
84
00:03:30,631 --> 00:03:32,367
that I assume
she wants out of me.
85
00:03:32,367 --> 00:03:33,637
You are a rock star.
This your first tour.
86
00:03:33,637 --> 00:03:34,973
You're supposed to go hard.
87
00:03:34,973 --> 00:03:36,844
That's the whole issue,
in my opinion.
88
00:03:36,844 --> 00:03:39,315
I feel like all of these girls
just want to fuck Lil Dicky.
89
00:03:39,315 --> 00:03:41,720
Is it really a crime
to want someone who wants
90
00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:43,691
to fall in love with...
91
00:03:43,691 --> 00:03:45,427
- the real Dave?
- Bro, you got to think
about her needs.
92
00:03:45,427 --> 00:03:46,997
She got her nails done,
she got her outfit.
93
00:03:46,997 --> 00:03:48,567
She told all her friends.
94
00:03:48,567 --> 00:03:49,836
It's gonna be the highlight
of her year.
95
00:03:49,836 --> 00:03:51,740
You got to beat
the pussy up, bro.
96
00:03:51,740 --> 00:03:53,778
But I don't even...
I don't fuck like this.
97
00:03:53,778 --> 00:03:55,313
That's not how I fuck,
Gata, okay?
98
00:03:55,313 --> 00:03:58,019
I-I do this. It's more...
It's rhythmic.
99
00:03:58,019 --> 00:03:59,689
Man, that shit look
complicated, man.
100
00:03:59,689 --> 00:04:02,327
Complicated? It's so simple.
It's missionary.
101
00:04:02,327 --> 00:04:04,265
- (scoffs)
- (country music plays quietly)
102
00:04:04,265 --> 00:04:05,802
(door closes)
103
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,578
DAVE:
Hi.
104
00:04:12,582 --> 00:04:14,853
You're just gonna
bust those open, bruh?
105
00:04:14,853 --> 00:04:16,523
- You ain't gonna
pay for them first?
- I'm gonna pay for 'em.
106
00:04:16,523 --> 00:04:18,894
- Just chill out.
- (scoffs)
107
00:04:25,373 --> 00:04:27,344
(man clears throat)
108
00:04:27,344 --> 00:04:30,718
Y'all find everything okay?
109
00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:34,960
Yeah. (coughs)
Oh.
110
00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:36,730
I'm sorry.
111
00:04:36,730 --> 00:04:40,705
You guys have condoms here?
112
00:04:40,705 --> 00:04:42,374
It's the same condoms everywhere.
113
00:04:42,374 --> 00:04:43,777
Why don't they make, like,
114
00:04:43,777 --> 00:04:45,515
smaller condoms
for the smaller dicks?
115
00:04:45,515 --> 00:04:48,319
Like, they make Magnums
for, like, big-dicked men.
116
00:04:48,319 --> 00:04:49,789
I feel like the condom
would stay on the dick easier
117
00:04:49,789 --> 00:04:51,425
if it was smaller sometimes.
118
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:52,829
GATA:
If you're that concerned
about STDs,
119
00:04:52,829 --> 00:04:54,533
why don't you just use
the Scroguard, bro,
120
00:04:54,533 --> 00:04:56,035
that Mike got you--
that plastic diaper shit?
121
00:04:56,035 --> 00:04:58,507
Uh, that's private business.
Don't talk about it.
122
00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:01,078
I don't know what he's talking
about, but he's not dangerous.
123
00:05:01,078 --> 00:05:04,619
- You crazy, man.
- They know I'm joking.
124
00:05:04,619 --> 00:05:06,690
GATA:
Man, they got the
Confederate flag in there, bro.
125
00:05:06,690 --> 00:05:08,359
- It's the Texas flag.
- (scoffs)
126
00:05:08,359 --> 00:05:10,965
Looked pretty Confederate
to me, man. Hey, Cliff.
127
00:05:10,965 --> 00:05:12,569
I got the goods.
128
00:05:12,569 --> 00:05:13,904
- Ooh.
- Pistachios, but I can't...
129
00:05:13,904 --> 00:05:15,808
- For you.
- Merci.
130
00:05:15,808 --> 00:05:17,879
- They break my teeth, man.
- For you.
- Thank you.
131
00:05:17,879 --> 00:05:19,950
- You want to smoke this?
- All right, man. It's hot.
132
00:05:19,950 --> 00:05:22,487
- Uh, I'll take a hit, I guess.
- (Gata scoffs)
133
00:05:23,289 --> 00:05:26,429
You just wet m
y fucking blunt.
You're fucking nasty.
134
00:05:26,429 --> 00:05:27,799
I'm gonna get some color.
135
00:05:27,799 --> 00:05:29,335
ELZ:
Racist.
136
00:05:29,335 --> 00:05:31,405
No disrespect.
137
00:05:45,735 --> 00:05:49,074
(sighs)
138
00:05:49,074 --> 00:05:50,678
(footsteps approaching)
139
00:05:50,678 --> 00:05:52,381
Trying to burn off the bacteria?
140
00:05:52,381 --> 00:05:54,686
I'm just not built for this.
141
00:05:54,686 --> 00:05:57,357
I can't be, like,
the rapper who goes around
142
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,796
and fucks every night.
That's not my thing.
143
00:05:59,796 --> 00:06:01,833
But I'm trying
to rewire my brain
144
00:06:01,833 --> 00:06:03,571
so I can actually
have fun for once.
145
00:06:03,571 --> 00:06:04,940
You've been stressed.
You've been working so hard.
146
00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:06,843
I know. And tour is just
the one time in life
147
00:06:06,843 --> 00:06:09,616
- where there's no album
to hand in.
- Yup.
148
00:06:09,616 --> 00:06:11,620
There's no songs to make.
I can just be free
149
00:06:11,620 --> 00:06:13,489
- and live life to the F.
- Yup.
150
00:06:13,489 --> 00:06:15,628
It's exactly like the time
I was up in the air. It was one
151
00:06:15,628 --> 00:06:17,799
- of those moments...
- This has nothing
to do with skydiving.
152
00:06:17,799 --> 00:06:18,934
This has everything
to do with skydiving, David.
153
00:06:18,934 --> 00:06:20,403
- Nothing to do...
- No, when you're
154
00:06:20,403 --> 00:06:21,405
hurtling toward the earth
155
00:06:21,405 --> 00:06:22,775
at 120 miles an hour,
156
00:06:22,775 --> 00:06:24,546
you're reaching max veloce,
it's incredible.
157
00:06:24,546 --> 00:06:25,915
And the chute doesn't open,
you start to freak out,
158
00:06:25,915 --> 00:06:27,552
but that's when you learn.
You learn, David.
159
00:06:27,552 --> 00:06:29,623
- When the instructor kisses you
- Mm.
160
00:06:29,623 --> 00:06:31,960
on the small of your neck,
and he says, "I'm sorry!,"
161
00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:34,966
that's when you learn to let go.
162
00:06:34,966 --> 00:06:38,707
I desperately crave
a genuine romantic connection.
163
00:06:38,707 --> 00:06:41,412
Like, I need to fall in love.
That's just who I am.
164
00:06:41,412 --> 00:06:44,686
- Well, maybe you shouldn't
hook up with your fans anymore.
- Okay.
165
00:06:44,686 --> 00:06:46,188
Maybe you shouldn't...
We don't need this
166
00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:47,759
- for the documentary, okay?
- Yeah, we do.
167
00:06:47,759 --> 00:06:50,731
Don't tell me what to do
with my documentary.
168
00:06:50,731 --> 00:06:52,434
Uh, I don't
want this footage, Emma.
169
00:06:52,434 --> 00:06:53,570
MIKE:
You don't know what
you're gonna use.
170
00:06:53,570 --> 00:06:54,506
DAVE:
Get different stuff.
171
00:06:54,506 --> 00:06:56,576
♪ ♪
172
00:07:09,936 --> 00:07:11,907
- EMMA: I can't listen
to this another time.
- MIKE: It's exhilarating.
173
00:07:11,907 --> 00:07:13,644
But what I'm saying is when
you're plummeting towards
174
00:07:13,644 --> 00:07:15,180
- the earth at terminal velocity,
- EMMA: God, I get it.
175
00:07:15,180 --> 00:07:16,650
the earth feels like
it's gonna swallow you whole.
176
00:07:16,650 --> 00:07:18,486
It's so scary, dude,
but you live.
177
00:07:18,486 --> 00:07:20,658
I love this story. He's still
telling the story, huh?
178
00:07:20,658 --> 00:07:22,027
- MIKE: Yeah.
- Hey, LD, what's them islands
179
00:07:22,027 --> 00:07:23,631
we going to on this tour?
180
00:07:23,631 --> 00:07:25,501
Uh, I don't know
the specifics, but...
181
00:07:25,501 --> 00:07:27,905
(whoops) We going
to the Specifics, y'all.
182
00:07:27,905 --> 00:07:29,676
- Specifics.
- Huh. Um...
183
00:07:29,676 --> 00:07:31,513
- Are you performing tonight?
- Oh, no.
184
00:07:31,513 --> 00:07:33,550
Tonight's all about
my sweet baby G right here.
185
00:07:33,550 --> 00:07:35,688
- MIKE: Gata's night, baby.
- Big dog's night.
- Hey, Lubbock, Texas
186
00:07:35,688 --> 00:07:37,558
- ain't ready
for a nigga like me.
- DAVE: They're not.
187
00:07:37,558 --> 00:07:39,194
They never were. They never
were a day. They never will be.
188
00:07:39,194 --> 00:07:40,898
- That's what I do.
- Uh, that's what
you've been doing.
189
00:07:40,898 --> 00:07:43,771
- Big G!
- Gata.
- (whooping)
190
00:07:43,771 --> 00:07:45,574
Aw, LD, do one song
with me, bro.
191
00:07:45,574 --> 00:07:47,578
No, thank you.
192
00:07:47,578 --> 00:07:49,816
It's my one night off.
Come on. I-I'm trying
193
00:07:49,816 --> 00:07:51,520
- to blend into the background,
be a normal guy.
- Yeah.
194
00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:52,789
It's hard to meet your wife
when you're onstage
195
00:07:52,789 --> 00:07:54,592
- being the star.
- Well, some people say
196
00:07:54,592 --> 00:07:56,095
- that's the easiest way
to meet your wife.
- Aw.
197
00:07:56,095 --> 00:07:57,999
You're with him every day?
How do you resist him?
198
00:07:57,999 --> 00:08:00,738
- Are you serious?
- DAVE: Look,
199
00:08:00,738 --> 00:08:02,207
I just want to know
if everyone's all in
200
00:08:02,207 --> 00:08:03,811
to have the best night
they can possibly have.
201
00:08:03,811 --> 00:08:05,113
'Cause I need that type
of comradery...
202
00:08:05,113 --> 00:08:08,721
(overlapping shouting, cheering)
203
00:08:08,721 --> 00:08:10,891
♪ Too many women,
I got too many women ♪
204
00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:13,797
♪ Man, my biggest problem,
I got too many women ♪
205
00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:16,703
♪ Damn, my head's spinning,
I got too many women ♪
206
00:08:16,703 --> 00:08:18,741
♪ Am I living in sin
and I see too many women ♪
207
00:08:18,741 --> 00:08:22,214
♪ I'm married to the money,
but I'm in love with my women ♪
208
00:08:22,214 --> 00:08:25,020
♪ Dark-skinned, light-skinned,
Puerto Rican, Asian ♪
209
00:08:25,020 --> 00:08:27,558
♪ Sorry, Mama,
but your son is crazy ♪
210
00:08:27,558 --> 00:08:29,963
♪ I'm-a get it together
if they pay me. ♪
211
00:08:29,963 --> 00:08:32,769
- Yeah.
- (cheering, whooping)
212
00:08:32,769 --> 00:08:34,572
Yeah!
213
00:08:34,572 --> 00:08:36,710
- (indistinct shout)
- CROWD (chanting): Dicky! Dicky!
214
00:08:36,710 --> 00:08:40,718
- Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! Dicky!
- Oh, no, no, no. Gata.
215
00:08:40,718 --> 00:08:43,857
- Dicky! Dicky! Dicky! Dicky!
- Gata. Gata.
216
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,895
- Dicky. Dicky.
- Thanks.
217
00:08:45,895 --> 00:08:47,699
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
218
00:08:47,699 --> 00:08:49,736
I appreciate the love y'all got
for my boy Dicky, man.
219
00:08:49,736 --> 00:08:52,240
I've been trying to get him
out here on this stage tonight,
220
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,579
but he on some
Carmen Sandiego type shit.
221
00:08:54,579 --> 00:08:56,850
Let's see if we can get him
on stage right now!
222
00:08:56,850 --> 00:08:58,887
(cheering, whooping)
223
00:08:58,887 --> 00:09:01,593
GATA: (chanting):
LD! LD! LD!
224
00:09:01,593 --> 00:09:03,764
ALL:
LD! LD!
225
00:09:03,764 --> 00:09:07,872
- LD! LD! LD! LD!
- (DJ airhorn blares)
226
00:09:07,872 --> 00:09:11,713
(cheering, whooping)
227
00:09:15,053 --> 00:09:17,725
♪ I'm drunk, I'm drunk ♪
228
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:22,000
♪ I'm really, really drunk ♪
229
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,304
♪ I'm drunk ♪
230
00:09:24,304 --> 00:09:27,344
♪ I'm really, really wasted ♪
231
00:09:27,344 --> 00:09:30,183
♪ Man, I'm so fucked-up ♪
232
00:09:30,183 --> 00:09:32,722
♪ I might suck a man's dick,
no, I'm playing, ha-ha. ♪
233
00:09:41,940 --> 00:09:45,313
What's your deal right now?
Why are you so lethargic?
234
00:09:45,313 --> 00:09:47,785
(exhales)
235
00:09:48,787 --> 00:09:50,356
You just got sucked.
236
00:09:50,356 --> 00:09:52,962
Sloppy toppy, bro.
237
00:09:52,962 --> 00:09:54,599
Who sucked you?
238
00:09:54,599 --> 00:09:56,302
- I had to, man. You...
- Where?
239
00:09:56,302 --> 00:09:57,939
(scoffs)
240
00:09:57,939 --> 00:10:00,611
What does this...
Whatever, I don't care.
241
00:10:00,611 --> 00:10:02,615
Let's have fun tonight.
Do you want a drink?
242
00:10:02,615 --> 00:10:05,921
Honestly, bro,
I'm exhausted as fuck, bro.
243
00:10:05,921 --> 00:10:07,792
- I'm about to go lay down, dawg.
- You're leaving?
244
00:10:07,792 --> 00:10:09,796
- Yeah, man. Yeah.
- What about my night off?
245
00:10:09,796 --> 00:10:11,900
What about the plan
that-that you committed to?
246
00:10:11,900 --> 00:10:13,837
- Man, I'm going, gone.
- Gata.
247
00:10:13,837 --> 00:10:15,841
- You never honor the plan, man.
- Hey, text me
248
00:10:15,841 --> 00:10:17,043
when you get to the hotel.
249
00:10:17,043 --> 00:10:19,114
♪ ♪
250
00:10:23,389 --> 00:10:25,828
- Hi.
- Hi.
251
00:10:25,828 --> 00:10:27,632
- Is this a good time?
- Yeah.
252
00:10:27,632 --> 00:10:30,003
Great, 'cause
I made something for you.
253
00:10:30,003 --> 00:10:31,907
- Oh, okay.
- Um...
254
00:10:31,907 --> 00:10:33,710
Oh, my God.
255
00:10:33,710 --> 00:10:35,046
It's you.
256
00:10:35,046 --> 00:10:36,817
- Oh, that's me?
- Yeah.
257
00:10:36,817 --> 00:10:38,821
- (laughs)
- Oh, wow. It's so heavy.
258
00:10:38,821 --> 00:10:40,658
It's concrete, that's why.
259
00:10:40,658 --> 00:10:42,060
It's, like, sharp, too.
260
00:10:42,060 --> 00:10:43,664
- I'm kind of nervous.
- Don't be nervous.
261
00:10:43,664 --> 00:10:44,999
This is great.
You're doing great.
262
00:10:44,999 --> 00:10:47,137
- Hey. Oh. (laughs)
- Oh.
263
00:10:47,137 --> 00:10:49,976
(laughs)
I appreciate this so much, okay?
264
00:10:49,976 --> 00:10:51,713
I'm such a big fan of yours.
265
00:10:51,713 --> 00:10:53,449
- Thank you.
- Um, I love Penith so much,
266
00:10:53,449 --> 00:10:55,253
and I'm really trying to break
into the industry, so...
267
00:10:55,253 --> 00:10:57,057
- Yeah.
- Ah, here I am. (laughs)
268
00:10:57,057 --> 00:10:59,027
Well, let me tell you firsthand,
269
00:10:59,027 --> 00:11:02,000
things are surprisingly possible
in life, okay? Go for it.
270
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:03,670
Wow. (laughs)
271
00:11:03,670 --> 00:11:05,006
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
272
00:11:05,006 --> 00:11:06,877
- Sure.
- Lil Dicky, I love you.
273
00:11:06,877 --> 00:11:08,647
I love you, too, okay?
Be safe.
274
00:11:10,450 --> 00:11:11,987
(weak chuckle)
275
00:11:11,987 --> 00:11:14,057
(indistinct conversation)
276
00:11:19,468 --> 00:11:21,973
- I never knew that.
- Yeah. All right.
277
00:11:27,150 --> 00:11:29,187
Fuck.
Oh, shit.
278
00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:34,832
WOMAN:
You doing all right?
279
00:11:34,832 --> 00:11:36,135
What?
280
00:11:36,135 --> 00:11:39,308
Are you doing all right?
281
00:11:40,310 --> 00:11:43,149
Oh. Yeah.
282
00:11:43,149 --> 00:11:47,190
Just a little statutory,
uh, issue I'm taking care of.
283
00:11:47,190 --> 00:11:49,896
Yeah, I'm just cleaning up
somebody else's mess.
284
00:11:49,896 --> 00:11:51,265
- Hi.
- Hi. (chuckles)
285
00:11:51,265 --> 00:11:53,002
- How you doing?
- I'm good. I'm sor...
286
00:11:53,002 --> 00:11:54,872
I don't-I don't know you.
287
00:11:54,872 --> 00:11:56,743
Well, how could you?
We're just now meeting.
288
00:11:56,743 --> 00:11:58,479
No, I know, but I know you're,
like, a singer or something,
289
00:11:58,479 --> 00:12:00,216
- just here with
my friends, but I just...
- Oh.
290
00:12:00,216 --> 00:12:01,853
I've never heard of you.
291
00:12:02,855 --> 00:12:04,525
Honestly, I prefer that.
292
00:12:04,525 --> 00:12:06,161
Like, great. It's good
293
00:12:06,161 --> 00:12:08,299
that you have a clean slate
on my personality.
294
00:12:08,299 --> 00:12:10,771
- Oh.
- Yeah, I'm a-I'm a rapper,
actually, not a singer.
295
00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:13,209
I do sing,
song-write, all that.
296
00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:15,881
Oh, you did that song
about being drunk.
297
00:12:15,881 --> 00:12:17,317
What was... what was it called?
298
00:12:17,317 --> 00:12:19,254
- It was...
- "I'm Drunk."
299
00:12:19,254 --> 00:12:21,292
Oh, yeah, well, I'm on my way.
300
00:12:21,292 --> 00:12:23,229
You... pig.
301
00:12:23,229 --> 00:12:24,532
(laughs)
302
00:12:24,532 --> 00:12:27,505
I don't know.
So, what's your deal--
303
00:12:27,505 --> 00:12:29,341
you just go to live music venues
304
00:12:29,341 --> 00:12:32,080
without even knowing who
the person is and you have fun?
305
00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:35,219
Wednesdays are like my Fridays.
I'm a nurse, so...
306
00:12:35,219 --> 00:12:37,223
- Ah. A nurse?
- Yeah. Had to
307
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:39,261
come blow off some steam,
you know?
308
00:12:39,261 --> 00:12:40,965
I appreciate everything
you do, uh,
309
00:12:40,965 --> 00:12:43,503
behind the scenes
for all the sick.
310
00:12:43,503 --> 00:12:45,874
- Thank-thank you.
- Yeah. But okay,
311
00:12:45,874 --> 00:12:48,045
I can't go any further
without knowing your name,
312
00:12:48,045 --> 00:12:49,782
- so...
- Oh, it's Campbell.
313
00:12:49,782 --> 00:12:51,118
Campbell?
314
00:12:51,118 --> 00:12:52,220
Yeah, like the soup.
315
00:12:52,220 --> 00:12:54,057
That's a perfect name.
316
00:12:54,057 --> 00:12:55,561
- Thanks?
- Campbell,
317
00:12:55,561 --> 00:12:57,865
can I ask you a relatively
hard-hitting question?
318
00:12:57,865 --> 00:12:59,134
Yeah.
319
00:12:59,134 --> 00:13:00,470
What's your availability
320
00:13:00,470 --> 00:13:02,374
as far as being
hit on right now?
321
00:13:02,374 --> 00:13:04,946
(chuckles)
Uh...
322
00:13:04,946 --> 00:13:07,083
Like, would you say you're
open-minded, or not at all?
323
00:13:07,083 --> 00:13:09,087
Uh...
324
00:13:09,087 --> 00:13:12,360
Yeah, I think I, uh... I'm...
325
00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,532
I'm definitely open to it.
326
00:13:15,534 --> 00:13:17,838
This is fun.
327
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:20,176
ELZ:
People are actually crazy.
328
00:13:20,176 --> 00:13:22,314
They were literally
pouring tequila in their eyes.
329
00:13:22,314 --> 00:13:26,523
Like, why? I wish I had, like,
40 cameras. I keep missing shit.
330
00:13:26,523 --> 00:13:28,827
Just ask them to redo it.
331
00:13:28,827 --> 00:13:31,198
I can't do that for my doc.
It's not real.
332
00:13:31,198 --> 00:13:34,939
Real? None of this is real,
Emma. Are you crazy?
333
00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,943
- What...
- We're on tour right now.
Tour's not real.
334
00:13:36,943 --> 00:13:39,481
When we come to town, it's like
their version of the Super Bowl.
335
00:13:39,481 --> 00:13:42,253
Okay, Mr. Big Shot
Who's Been On Tour.
336
00:13:42,253 --> 00:13:44,057
Do you not understand
that white people act out
337
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:45,326
when they see a camera?
338
00:13:45,326 --> 00:13:48,099
- What?
- Trust me. Come on.
339
00:13:49,502 --> 00:13:51,973
- EMMA: Wait...
340
00:13:51,973 --> 00:13:54,344
- White boy summer!
- White boy summer!
341
00:13:54,344 --> 00:13:56,549
(overlapping shouting)
342
00:13:56,549 --> 00:13:58,419
Then I'm gonna continue
to smoke this joint, then.
343
00:13:58,419 --> 00:14:00,223
- All right.
- Oh, hi, man.
344
00:14:00,223 --> 00:14:02,160
MAN:
LD!
345
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:03,930
Thank you.
346
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:05,400
Does that get annoying?
347
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,638
It's just praise. It's...
All it is is praise.
348
00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:10,476
- Okay.
- But it's the life I chose.
349
00:14:10,476 --> 00:14:12,447
- Yeah.
- I always wanted
to be ubiquitous.
350
00:14:12,447 --> 00:14:17,323
Well, uh... good luck,
and you have a new fan,
351
00:14:17,323 --> 00:14:19,261
and I really hope
that you make it.
352
00:14:19,261 --> 00:14:21,331
- Get this out of here.
- (laughs)
353
00:14:21,331 --> 00:14:22,635
You're saying goodbye?
354
00:14:22,635 --> 00:14:24,237
- Well...
- You're not about to leave.
355
00:14:24,237 --> 00:14:26,275
- Uh...
- You can't be. You're not gonna
356
00:14:26,275 --> 00:14:27,878
let something like this
totally evaporate.
357
00:14:27,878 --> 00:14:29,615
No. No, no, no.
I'm engaged.
358
00:14:29,615 --> 00:14:31,385
- Oh, of course you are.
- No, no, no.
359
00:14:31,385 --> 00:14:33,155
No, no, no!
No, no, like... (laughs)
360
00:14:33,155 --> 00:14:36,328
Like, I'm engaged
in the conversation.
361
00:14:36,328 --> 00:14:38,065
- Oh.
- Yeah.
362
00:14:38,065 --> 00:14:39,502
So, a bunch of us are gonna
go to my friend Connor's.
363
00:14:39,502 --> 00:14:41,105
He's having
a little get-together.
364
00:14:41,105 --> 00:14:42,608
- Oh.
- You want to come?
365
00:14:42,608 --> 00:14:44,979
'Cause I like
hanging out with you.
366
00:14:44,979 --> 00:14:47,317
I like hanging out
with you so much.
367
00:14:47,317 --> 00:14:50,123
- All right.
- I do have a tour bus
368
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:52,528
- parked half a block away.
It's so charming.
- Oh, no.
369
00:14:52,528 --> 00:14:55,901
I'm-I'm not, like, a groupie.
I'm just a regular girl.
370
00:14:55,901 --> 00:14:59,007
Of course you are.
I respect that.
371
00:14:59,007 --> 00:15:00,978
- We'll go to... Connor's?
- Yeah, Connor.
372
00:15:00,978 --> 00:15:02,313
Okay. I have to grab something
off that bus.
373
00:15:02,313 --> 00:15:04,284
- Will you stay here?
- Yeah.
374
00:15:04,284 --> 00:15:05,954
Okay, because, in my opinion,
I feel as though
375
00:15:05,954 --> 00:15:08,359
this is what life is all about--
moments like this.
376
00:15:09,161 --> 00:15:11,499
- (laughs)
- We'll
figure something out
later, but yeah.
377
00:15:11,499 --> 00:15:13,436
- We'll figure it out.
We'll work on it.
- Okay. All right.
378
00:15:13,436 --> 00:15:16,676
SCRO-GUY:
You're getting ready
to have a blast,
379
00:15:16,676 --> 00:15:19,715
but you're not sure
about someone's sexual past.
380
00:15:19,715 --> 00:15:24,324
Part of the skin of
your genital area has a cover,
381
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:27,297
but most is still exposed
to your lover.
382
00:15:27,297 --> 00:15:29,234
Not anymore.
383
00:15:30,671 --> 00:15:32,975
Now there's Scroguard.
384
00:15:32,975 --> 00:15:37,585
The powerful new product that
you can wear with any condom.
385
00:15:37,585 --> 00:15:40,256
The secret is
the high-quality premium latex
386
00:15:40,256 --> 00:15:42,595
that is thick enough
to cover your genital area
387
00:15:42,595 --> 00:15:45,466
- but thin enough
to feel like a second skin.
- (mutters)
388
00:15:45,466 --> 00:15:47,403
Just fasten any two buttons
389
00:15:47,403 --> 00:15:49,575
securely into place,
and when you're ready...
390
00:15:49,575 --> 00:15:52,080
Hey, Dave...
Oh, shit!
391
00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:55,153
- Oh!
- Geez. (stammers) Uh...
No shitting on the bus!
392
00:15:55,153 --> 00:15:56,689
No, I'm not-I'm not shitting!
393
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:58,527
I'm just fixing my pants.
394
00:15:58,527 --> 00:16:01,431
I changed my underwear
'cause I met a girl
395
00:16:01,431 --> 00:16:03,335
and I was talking to her,
and I-I, like,
396
00:16:03,335 --> 00:16:05,373
soaked my first underwear
with pre-cum.
397
00:16:05,373 --> 00:16:08,012
- Okay.
- I-I met a girl.
398
00:16:08,012 --> 00:16:10,383
Uh, congratulations, man.
I'm happy for you.
399
00:16:10,383 --> 00:16:12,020
- Wish me luck.
- You deserve love, Dave.
400
00:16:17,531 --> 00:16:19,502
- ♪ Worry about tomorrow... ♪
- ♪ Don't drink and drive ♪
401
00:16:19,502 --> 00:16:21,371
♪ Give me that pizza, dawg,
give me that pizza ♪
402
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:23,209
♪ You know, I gotta eat ya ♪
403
00:16:23,209 --> 00:16:25,079
♪ Uber says
my driver's name is Gangi ♪
404
00:16:25,079 --> 00:16:27,183
♪ And he said
he's hard of hearing ♪
405
00:16:27,183 --> 00:16:29,221
- ♪ Cool, I don't care... ♪
- CAMPBELL: Sorry.
406
00:16:29,221 --> 00:16:31,391
- No, this is honestly
my fault, uh...
- Anyway, anyway, okay.
407
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:33,597
- It was like 3:00 a. m.,
and we're all, like
- Yeah.
408
00:16:33,597 --> 00:16:35,567
- Sure.
- drunk as piss,
and all of a sudden, we hear,
409
00:16:35,567 --> 00:16:37,571
like a "bang, bang, bang." Like,
Jurassic Park or something.
410
00:16:37,571 --> 00:16:39,509
- It was like...
- Oh, my God. What was it--
like, a rapist?
411
00:16:39,509 --> 00:16:41,445
No, no.
It was actually my goat.
412
00:16:41,445 --> 00:16:43,315
My goat got out of its pen.
It was, like, ramming its horns
413
00:16:43,315 --> 00:16:45,319
- against the glass. Ramming...
- Wait, hold it. You have a goat?
414
00:16:45,319 --> 00:16:46,723
- Like, you're a goat owner?
- Mm-hmm.
415
00:16:46,723 --> 00:16:48,325
Yeah, I got a bunch of goats.
416
00:16:48,325 --> 00:16:50,731
You're, like, out of a fable.
417
00:16:50,731 --> 00:16:52,668
Hey, you're the fucking GOAT,
LD. Come on.
418
00:16:52,668 --> 00:16:55,473
- Hey, y'all, shut the fuck up!
- Thank you, bro.
419
00:16:55,473 --> 00:16:57,343
Sorry.
Don't even look at that.
420
00:16:57,343 --> 00:16:59,347
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- He's fine. Oh.
421
00:16:59,347 --> 00:17:01,118
- Get in here.
- (laughs)
422
00:17:01,118 --> 00:17:02,755
Wow, you just broke
the touch barrier.
423
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:04,625
- (laughing)
- So nonchalantly,
424
00:17:04,625 --> 00:17:06,529
you're just gonna break it
like that, and not even... Wow.
425
00:17:06,529 --> 00:17:08,733
- I mean, someone had to.
- I'm totally on board
with it, FYI.
426
00:17:08,733 --> 00:17:11,471
- Um...
- Oh, my God.
427
00:17:14,277 --> 00:17:15,814
I have to pee.
428
00:17:15,814 --> 00:17:18,085
Yeah.
I understand that.
429
00:17:18,085 --> 00:17:20,356
I've had to pee in the past, and
you never know when it's coming.
430
00:17:20,356 --> 00:17:22,528
- Thank you. All right.
- Yeah. I'm right there with you.
431
00:17:22,528 --> 00:17:24,097
- Get all the piss out.
- All right.
432
00:17:24,097 --> 00:17:25,399
- I'll be right here. I'm great.
- Okay.
433
00:17:25,399 --> 00:17:26,636
I'm in heaven.
434
00:17:26,636 --> 00:17:28,372
(sighs)
435
00:17:28,372 --> 00:17:30,376
(indistinct chatter)
436
00:17:30,376 --> 00:17:31,779
(passes gas)
437
00:17:31,779 --> 00:17:33,583
(sighs)
438
00:17:33,583 --> 00:17:36,455
What's up, man?
439
00:17:36,455 --> 00:17:39,427
Hey. You guys hanging?
440
00:17:39,427 --> 00:17:40,697
- CONNOR: How you doing?
- Good.
441
00:17:40,697 --> 00:17:43,503
- (sighs)
- MATTY: Hey, man, so...
442
00:17:43,503 --> 00:17:45,807
(muttering)
443
00:17:45,807 --> 00:17:47,645
What?
444
00:17:49,414 --> 00:17:51,385
You like Ram?
445
00:17:51,385 --> 00:17:54,257
R-Ram?
Uh, do I like what?
446
00:17:54,257 --> 00:17:56,194
- Uh...
- What do you mean? Like the...
447
00:17:56,194 --> 00:17:58,465
- Like the processing power?
- CONNOR: It's...
448
00:17:58,465 --> 00:17:59,802
the L. A. Rams.
Like, Los Angeles Rams.
449
00:17:59,802 --> 00:18:02,307
- Like, uh, football team.
- Oh, shit.
450
00:18:02,307 --> 00:18:04,444
Is he okay, or is he on,
like, Oxys or something?
451
00:18:04,444 --> 00:18:07,283
- CONNOR: No, no. I mean...
- Is this Appalachia
that we're in?
452
00:18:07,283 --> 00:18:09,555
'Cause I know all about the
opioid crisis that you probably
453
00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:10,824
have to deal
with at every moment.
454
00:18:10,824 --> 00:18:12,528
I've got molly,
if you want some.
455
00:18:12,528 --> 00:18:15,667
Oh. No, thanks.
456
00:18:15,667 --> 00:18:18,607
It's, like, dark purple.
457
00:18:18,607 --> 00:18:20,544
I'm okay.
458
00:18:20,544 --> 00:18:22,681
I don't even understand the
color spectrum of molly, but...
459
00:18:22,681 --> 00:18:25,821
- What's your name?
We haven't met.
- Grace.
460
00:18:25,821 --> 00:18:29,829
- You... Race?
- Hey, are you hiring,
by the way, LD?
461
00:18:29,829 --> 00:18:33,469
- No.
- Um, I majored
in-in golf course management.
462
00:18:33,469 --> 00:18:35,507
- Uh-huh.
- Um, but there's a lot
463
00:18:35,507 --> 00:18:37,645
- of crossover between the two.
- Yeah, I think
464
00:18:37,645 --> 00:18:39,849
you're better off on the greens
there, 'cause, like,
465
00:18:39,849 --> 00:18:43,255
- we're just so fully staffed.
- No, yeah, yeah, yeah.
466
00:18:43,255 --> 00:18:44,625
Yeah.
467
00:18:44,625 --> 00:18:46,729
Um, normally,
468
00:18:46,729 --> 00:18:48,700
like, shit's like way
more popping, you know? Like...
469
00:18:48,700 --> 00:18:50,202
- No.
- It's pretty low-key,
'cause it's Wednesday night
470
00:18:50,202 --> 00:18:52,340
- and shit, and, like...
- All good. All G.
471
00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:53,877
But, yo, like, normally,
we're playing, like,
472
00:18:53,877 --> 00:18:56,616
Mancala or, like,
Cards Against Humanity,
473
00:18:56,616 --> 00:18:58,520
- or, like, fucking...
- Sure.
474
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,590
- If you came back, like, on a...
- Yeah.
475
00:19:00,590 --> 00:19:03,195
No, don't... No presh, man.
I'm, like, just happy to be...
476
00:19:03,195 --> 00:19:05,801
I'm honestly here
'cause of Campbell.
477
00:19:05,801 --> 00:19:07,604
- Bro.
- Yeah.
478
00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:10,677
I heard
her pussy's a straight-up V.
479
00:19:10,677 --> 00:19:14,752
I... Yeah, I believe you. Um...
480
00:19:14,752 --> 00:19:17,390
Hey, you know what? Fuck it.
Hey, Hey, Travis!
481
00:19:17,390 --> 00:19:19,762
Hey, fire that shit up!
We're playing Hot Seat, bitch.
482
00:19:19,762 --> 00:19:21,499
- (people whooping)
- What are we doing?
483
00:19:21,499 --> 00:19:22,568
(laughs)
484
00:19:27,978 --> 00:19:29,515
DAVE:
It's a prank phone call-
based game?
485
00:19:29,515 --> 00:19:30,517
- Mm-hmm. Shh.
- How often do you play it?
486
00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:31,786
All right. All right.
487
00:19:31,786 --> 00:19:33,355
(line ringing)
488
00:19:33,355 --> 00:19:36,496
♪ ♪
489
00:19:36,496 --> 00:19:37,765
- MAN: Hello?
- Hey.
490
00:19:37,765 --> 00:19:40,570
I'm... I'm with your brother.
491
00:19:40,570 --> 00:19:43,576
Wait, Tim's with you?
He okay?
492
00:19:43,576 --> 00:19:45,947
- He's OD'ing.
- Oh, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck, fuck!
493
00:19:45,947 --> 00:19:47,785
Did you call 911?
494
00:19:47,785 --> 00:19:50,423
Yeah, but they can't...
495
00:19:50,423 --> 00:19:53,530
- CAMPBELL: Come on.
- revive... Aah!
496
00:19:53,530 --> 00:19:55,399
- (laughing cheering)
- It's the hot seat! Fuck!
497
00:19:55,399 --> 00:19:56,703
Okay, I'm gonna
get another drink.
498
00:19:56,703 --> 00:19:58,640
- Where you going?
- (indistinct chatter)
499
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:00,711
- I'm getting another drink.
- DAVE: Hurry back.
- Hey, LD.
500
00:20:00,711 --> 00:20:02,848
Wait. You probably got all sorts
501
00:20:02,848 --> 00:20:04,317
of celebs and shit
in your phone.
502
00:20:04,317 --> 00:20:05,987
- (laughs)
- Wait. I...
503
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:06,989
Come on.
504
00:20:06,989 --> 00:20:09,662
Alfonso Ribeiro?
505
00:20:09,662 --> 00:20:11,465
That a pasta?
506
00:20:11,465 --> 00:20:13,670
Carlton? That doesn't mean
anything when I say it? Carlton?
507
00:20:13,670 --> 00:20:15,674
All right, all right, all right.
LD, come on. It's your turn.
508
00:20:15,674 --> 00:20:17,678
- Oh, no. I'm...
- Come on. Get on that hot seat,
509
00:20:17,678 --> 00:20:18,680
- for old times' sake.
- You...
510
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:19,982
Let me watch how you...
511
00:20:19,982 --> 00:20:21,351
- CONNOR: Fuck you.
- What are you doing?
512
00:20:21,351 --> 00:20:22,855
- Wow. What?
- (laughs) Okay.
513
00:20:22,855 --> 00:20:25,694
So you're really not
gonna kiss me right now?
514
00:20:25,694 --> 00:20:29,802
Why-why would you think that?
It's crazy of you.
515
00:20:29,802 --> 00:20:31,271
- (Grace mutters)
- Campbell, would you
come out here?
516
00:20:31,271 --> 00:20:33,676
Your friends are getting
a little dicey.
517
00:20:33,676 --> 00:20:35,479
- Oh.
- Need you back here.
518
00:20:35,479 --> 00:20:37,483
Fuck. She blew it.
519
00:20:37,483 --> 00:20:40,690
- What do you mean?
- I mean, fucking passed out.
520
00:20:40,690 --> 00:20:42,795
- No, she's not.
- CONNOR: Yeah.
521
00:20:46,401 --> 00:20:47,771
GRACE:
(laughs) I'm drunk.
522
00:20:47,771 --> 00:20:50,510
- She's drunk.
- MATTY: Guns up!
523
00:20:50,510 --> 00:20:54,484
- GRACE: Guns up!
- MATTY: Guns up, motherfuckers!
524
00:20:54,484 --> 00:20:57,423
Aw, that sucks. Her mission
was to fuck you tonight.
525
00:20:58,225 --> 00:21:00,564
Wait, what do
you mean,
you said it was her mission?
526
00:21:00,564 --> 00:21:03,469
- Like, going into the night?
- Yeah.
527
00:21:03,469 --> 00:21:05,607
Then why did she tell me
when I met her
528
00:21:05,607 --> 00:21:07,443
that she had never heard
of Lil Dicky?
529
00:21:07,443 --> 00:21:09,615
- (laughing)
- Oh, is that what she told you?
530
00:21:09,615 --> 00:21:10,984
She probably just said that
531
00:21:10,984 --> 00:21:12,788
'cause she's watched
all your interviews.
532
00:21:12,788 --> 00:21:14,492
She knows that's
what you want to hear.
533
00:21:14,492 --> 00:21:18,398
She's a die-hard. I mean,
she knew what to tell you.
534
00:21:18,398 --> 00:21:21,404
Okay.
I'm-I'm gonna leave.
535
00:21:21,404 --> 00:21:23,910
No, no, no, no, no.
No, come on, man. No, no, no.
536
00:21:23,910 --> 00:21:25,412
- Yeah.
- LD, no. There's a bunch
of people still coming.
537
00:21:25,412 --> 00:21:27,518
This shit's just
getting started.
538
00:21:27,518 --> 00:21:29,387
- Come on.
- It's so late.
We leave tomorrow.
539
00:21:29,387 --> 00:21:32,059
This is literally the best night
of my entire life, man.
540
00:21:32,059 --> 00:21:35,299
That's... Really?
541
00:21:36,101 --> 00:21:37,571
Yes.
542
00:21:38,907 --> 00:21:41,478
Uh, I'm sorry.
543
00:21:41,478 --> 00:21:43,550
Or congrat...
544
00:21:43,550 --> 00:21:44,885
I don't know what
to say to that.
545
00:21:44,885 --> 00:21:46,889
Tell us what it's like.
546
00:21:46,889 --> 00:21:49,360
Just tell us what
it's really, really like.
547
00:21:49,360 --> 00:21:52,033
- It's not like anything, man.
- MATTY: Yeah, man,
548
00:21:52,033 --> 00:21:54,939
do the girls just
fap for you, nonstop?
549
00:21:54,939 --> 00:21:57,376
Fap?
550
00:21:59,949 --> 00:22:04,558
- All right, sit down.
- (laughs) Okay. All right.
551
00:22:04,558 --> 00:22:05,927
- You guys want
to know what it's like.
- Oh, fuck, yeah.
552
00:22:05,927 --> 00:22:07,531
I'll tell you
what it's really like. Yeah.
553
00:22:07,531 --> 00:22:09,668
Here's what it's like.
I go around America
554
00:22:09,668 --> 00:22:11,906
and I meet people like you,
and every single time,
555
00:22:11,906 --> 00:22:13,442
they look at me exactly the way
556
00:22:13,442 --> 00:22:14,945
you guys are staring
at me right now.
557
00:22:14,945 --> 00:22:16,983
It's weird. And people
have preconceived notions
558
00:22:16,983 --> 00:22:19,555
about the way that I behave,
about the way that I fuck.
559
00:22:19,555 --> 00:22:21,559
(sputters)
I feel that.
560
00:22:21,559 --> 00:22:23,596
Fucking ain't easy, broham.
561
00:22:23,596 --> 00:22:26,969
Not easy at all. I've had so
many insane sexual encounters.
562
00:22:26,969 --> 00:22:29,875
And truthfully, the thing
that I want the most
563
00:22:29,875 --> 00:22:33,750
is incredibly simple, but
I could never really ask for it.
564
00:22:33,750 --> 00:22:35,820
What?
565
00:22:36,622 --> 00:22:40,429
So, my dick is shaped
like a manatee.
566
00:22:40,429 --> 00:22:41,799
In the sense that, like,
you know how, like,
567
00:22:41,799 --> 00:22:43,736
the manatee is...
have, like, a bend
568
00:22:43,736 --> 00:22:46,107
and, like, a...
So my dick is bent.
569
00:22:46,107 --> 00:22:48,680
The thing that
satisfies me most in life
570
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:53,155
is when that bend
simply gets straightened.
571
00:22:53,155 --> 00:22:55,627
There's no STD threat whatsoever.
572
00:22:55,627 --> 00:22:58,098
It's truly my heaven on Earth,
but I could never ask for that
573
00:22:58,098 --> 00:22:59,702
because it's so weird,
574
00:22:59,702 --> 00:23:01,639
and the women would
tell all their friends.
575
00:23:01,639 --> 00:23:04,511
But that wouldn't happen
with my soulmate.
576
00:23:04,511 --> 00:23:06,114
I'm looking for love.
577
00:23:06,114 --> 00:23:08,151
I'm looking for my wife, okay?
578
00:23:08,151 --> 00:23:10,523
- Hey, let us see your dick.
- (laughs)
579
00:23:10,523 --> 00:23:12,594
(scattered laughter)
580
00:23:12,594 --> 00:23:16,602
(chuckles) No.
But you asked me what it's like.
581
00:23:16,602 --> 00:23:17,738
It's not even that interesting.
582
00:23:17,738 --> 00:23:18,706
- It's actually...
- Come on, Dicky.
583
00:23:18,706 --> 00:23:20,042
(overlapping chatter)
584
00:23:20,042 --> 00:23:22,046
- Come on.
- Uh... I love it.
585
00:23:22,046 --> 00:23:23,516
CONNOR:
Hey, come on, Lil Dicky.
586
00:23:23,516 --> 00:23:24,585
MATTY:
Come on, Lil Dicky, come on.
587
00:23:24,585 --> 00:23:25,654
CONNOR:
Let me see it.
588
00:23:25,654 --> 00:23:26,622
You always talk all this shit
589
00:23:26,622 --> 00:23:27,891
about your dick,
590
00:23:27,891 --> 00:23:29,728
but you never
show it to anybody.
591
00:23:29,728 --> 00:23:31,464
- Come on, Lil Dicky.
- Come on!
- (overlapping chatter)
592
00:23:31,464 --> 00:23:34,137
- Show us your fucking dick!
- Come on!
- Come on!
593
00:23:34,137 --> 00:23:36,007
- (Dave groans)
- Show us your fucking dick!
594
00:23:36,007 --> 00:23:38,646
(grunts)
595
00:23:38,646 --> 00:23:40,784
What the fuck is that?
596
00:23:40,784 --> 00:23:43,188
(laughs) A diaper?
597
00:23:43,188 --> 00:23:45,994
No, uh... It's, uh,
598
00:23:45,994 --> 00:23:48,031
it's called the Scroguard.
It's, uh...
599
00:23:48,031 --> 00:23:50,770
Look it up on YouTube. It's the
funniest thing you'll ever see.
600
00:23:50,770 --> 00:23:53,543
It's, like, STD prevention,
601
00:23:53,543 --> 00:23:55,714
but, like, the comedy version.
602
00:23:58,085 --> 00:24:00,189
Show us your dick, Lil Dicky!
(Dave whimpers)
603
00:24:00,189 --> 00:24:02,460
(laughing)
604
00:24:04,230 --> 00:24:06,636
("So Damn Lucky"
by Taylor McCall playing)
605
00:24:06,636 --> 00:24:08,740
(sighs)
606
00:24:10,744 --> 00:24:12,714
(truck doors close)
607
00:24:12,714 --> 00:24:15,553
(indistinct chatter)
608
00:24:15,553 --> 00:24:17,056
- (bottles rattle)
- Oh...
609
00:24:17,056 --> 00:24:18,926
MAN:
Connor?
610
00:24:19,928 --> 00:24:21,197
Who's that?
611
00:24:23,135 --> 00:24:25,874
Yo, they're all in there.
They're still chillin'.
612
00:24:26,842 --> 00:24:29,047
- ♪ Sober up ♪
- Was that Lil Dicky?
613
00:24:29,047 --> 00:24:32,186
- Come back, Dicky!
- ♪ Settle down ♪
614
00:24:32,186 --> 00:24:34,190
♪ You should be... ♪
615
00:24:34,190 --> 00:24:35,727
MAN:
Lil Dicky!
616
00:24:35,727 --> 00:24:38,933
♪ Gone by now ♪
617
00:24:38,933 --> 00:24:41,104
♪ But you're not ♪
618
00:24:41,104 --> 00:24:44,210
♪ Don't know how I got ♪
619
00:24:44,210 --> 00:24:46,649
♪ So damn lucky. ♪
620
00:24:54,631 --> 00:24:57,537
♪ I'm drunk ♪
621
00:24:57,537 --> 00:24:59,742
♪ I'm really, really drunk... ♪
622
00:24:59,742 --> 00:25:01,244
(man cackling)
623
00:25:01,244 --> 00:25:02,714
- ♪ I'm drunk ♪
- MAN: Hey, it's him!
624
00:25:02,714 --> 00:25:04,952
Turn around!
625
00:25:04,952 --> 00:25:06,655
- It's him, it's him!
- MAN 2: It's him, it's him!
626
00:25:08,659 --> 00:25:10,697
(tires screech)
627
00:25:11,799 --> 00:25:13,536
(man cackling)
628
00:25:24,023 --> 00:25:26,829
Hey, motherfucker. What
the fuck are you thinking, boy?
629
00:25:26,829 --> 00:25:29,735
Whoa! Hey! Stand your ground!
Stand your ground!
630
00:25:29,735 --> 00:25:32,106
- What?
- I'm standing my ground!
631
00:25:32,106 --> 00:25:35,714
You stand your ground, I'm
standing mine, so no reason!
632
00:25:36,414 --> 00:25:38,786
- That ain't how it works.
- Uh...
633
00:25:38,786 --> 00:25:40,122
Lil Dicky! I'm Lil Dicky!
634
00:25:40,122 --> 00:25:41,257
Please don't, please just...
635
00:25:41,257 --> 00:25:43,061
- Lil Dicky?
- Yeah.
636
00:25:43,061 --> 00:25:44,765
- The rapper?
- Yeah! Yes!
637
00:25:44,765 --> 00:25:48,004
The rapper. That's me.
I'm, uh, I'm here.
638
00:25:48,004 --> 00:25:51,144
- So, I got to use
your phone, it's...
- No, you ain't.
639
00:25:51,144 --> 00:25:53,916
Yes, I am. What do you mean
I'm not? Of co... Uh, uh...
640
00:25:53,916 --> 00:25:56,922
Obviously this is...
Look at the situation, man.
641
00:25:56,922 --> 00:25:58,726
Can't you tell by my posture?
642
00:25:58,726 --> 00:26:00,864
Prove it.
643
00:26:00,864 --> 00:26:05,139
(exhales sharply)
Prove it. Uh...
644
00:26:06,709 --> 00:26:07,944
What's that?
645
00:26:07,944 --> 00:26:09,882
Like... Or...
646
00:26:09,882 --> 00:26:13,355
It's...
You-you know it's me.
647
00:26:13,355 --> 00:26:16,662
Please, I got to use
your phone, man.
648
00:26:16,662 --> 00:26:18,966
Aren't you a "gayman?"
649
00:26:18,966 --> 00:26:20,904
You...
650
00:26:20,904 --> 00:26:22,641
I couldn't hear what you said.
651
00:26:22,641 --> 00:26:25,279
Aren't you a "gayman?"
652
00:26:27,116 --> 00:26:29,688
Like the dinosaur lizard?
653
00:26:29,688 --> 00:26:32,059
Nah, like aren't you a faggot?
654
00:26:32,059 --> 00:26:35,700
Oh. I don't know exactly
how you're using that word,
655
00:26:35,700 --> 00:26:38,205
but I suspect that depending on
how you define it,
656
00:26:38,205 --> 00:26:41,044
that, like...
657
00:26:41,044 --> 00:26:44,317
like, to an extent, yeah, yes.
658
00:26:44,317 --> 00:26:47,389
WOMAN:
Tom, what's going on out there?
659
00:26:47,389 --> 00:26:49,928
I'll be there in a minute, Pat.
660
00:26:49,928 --> 00:26:51,331
(footsteps departing)
661
00:26:51,331 --> 00:26:52,934
Hey!
662
00:26:52,934 --> 00:26:55,038
♪ ♪
663
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:07,631
(line ringing)
664
00:27:10,102 --> 00:27:11,371
MIKE:
(clears throat) Hello?
665
00:27:11,371 --> 00:27:13,876
Mike. Oh, thank God
you picked up.
666
00:27:13,876 --> 00:27:15,680
I need you to come
grab me right now.
667
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:17,216
- You're in room 207.
- No, no.
668
00:27:17,216 --> 00:27:19,420
- I'm not at the hotel. Uh...
- Where are you?
669
00:27:19,420 --> 00:27:21,090
(whispers): Thank you so much
for everything. I appreciate it.
670
00:27:21,090 --> 00:27:22,426
Hello?
(normal volume): I don't know
671
00:27:22,426 --> 00:27:23,830
how to explain it to you,
but you just
672
00:27:23,830 --> 00:27:25,432
got to come get me
right now, okay?
673
00:27:25,432 --> 00:27:27,136
Are you all right?
Where are you, man?
674
00:27:27,136 --> 00:27:29,842
I'm fine. I'm fine.
I'm at, uh,
675
00:27:29,842 --> 00:27:33,114
4218 Fannin Boulevard.
Okay?
676
00:27:33,114 --> 00:27:35,018
- Yeah, no problem, man.
I'll be there soon.
- (scribbling)
677
00:27:35,018 --> 00:27:36,856
- Thank you, Mike. Thank you.
- Just got to get up
678
00:27:36,856 --> 00:27:38,826
and get dressed.
679
00:27:38,826 --> 00:27:41,264
You know, I'm always
losing one sock.
680
00:27:41,264 --> 00:27:43,235
- Wha... Mike?
- Yeah?
681
00:27:45,773 --> 00:27:48,378
Uh, bring a couple
hundred bucks.
682
00:27:48,378 --> 00:27:51,117
You'll see, like, when
the dick's fully blooded,
683
00:27:51,117 --> 00:27:52,888
there's, like,
a little bit of a bend.
684
00:27:52,888 --> 00:27:54,925
My ideal way for this to happen
is if you take that bend
685
00:27:54,925 --> 00:27:56,261
and you just simply
straighten it.
686
00:27:56,261 --> 00:27:59,066
(speaks Spanish)
687
00:27:59,066 --> 00:28:01,404
Uh, the bend, and if you
just take the bend
688
00:28:01,404 --> 00:28:05,145
and you straighten
and then just wait.
689
00:28:05,145 --> 00:28:06,314
(continues speaking Spanish)
690
00:28:06,314 --> 00:28:07,717
No, no, no, no mueva.
691
00:28:08,485 --> 00:28:12,026
Yeah, uh, do
you know what
a manatee is? Manatee.
692
00:28:12,026 --> 00:28:13,395
Manatee, the sea. Sea.
693
00:28:13,395 --> 00:28:14,463
(imitates manatee's bellow)
694
00:28:14,463 --> 00:28:16,702
Manatee?
(speaks Spanish)
695
00:28:17,938 --> 00:28:20,342
I am an animal. I am.
We're all a...
696
00:28:20,342 --> 00:28:22,146
I am an animal.
You know what?
697
00:28:22,146 --> 00:28:23,481
- No...
- We-we don't-we don't
even have to...
698
00:28:23,481 --> 00:28:25,753
- We don't have to do it.
- No. No, no, no, no, no.
699
00:28:25,753 --> 00:28:28,191
- (speaking Spanish)
- I'm okay. Okay.
700
00:28:28,191 --> 00:28:29,193
It's totally cool.
701
00:28:29,193 --> 00:28:32,233
Oh, so... Oh.
702
00:28:32,233 --> 00:28:35,205
Yeah. Just s-still.
703
00:28:35,205 --> 00:28:37,443
Uh-huh.
704
00:28:37,443 --> 00:28:40,148
♪ ♪
705
00:29:44,176 --> 00:29:47,951
Captioned by
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53838
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