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WOMAN: Good morning!
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I'm Maureen MacIntyre,
and we have got a...
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Golden Waves Radio.
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That's Maureen's Magical Mornings.
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Use salt instead of sugar.
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Could you imagine that?
I mean, imagine that!
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Or maybe, like me, you've tried
to chop a tomato with a blunt knife.
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Good Lord, how banal.
We'd like to hear your anecdote.
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Give us a call.
I've got an anecdote.
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Remember when I ran
out of soy sauce?
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Oh, I remember that, Dad.
Classic story.
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Helen, hurry up, please.
I need to make an announcement.
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Good morning. Reporting in
for the big announcement.
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Finally.
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Well, today is the official opening
of Conch Mediation Services.
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Or this.
No, don't be silly.
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We're gonna need that for tea.
Yeah, sorry.
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Mind you, who's gonna need tea
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now that we've got
George Clooney-grade expresso?
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Helen, what are you doing?
Hey.
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Yes, they're prepared to risk it.
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Can you see it? Is it on the roof?
(PIGEON COOING)
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I prepared your mother's will,
God rest her soul.
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Oh, no rest for Mum's soul,
I'm afraid.
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She's downstairs.
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Do you know Jesus, Mrs Gruber?
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No-one knows him, mate. Shut up.
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What?
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I don't know, like Ratsak,
but for pigeons?
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Jesus Christ, Fisk,
we don't want to kill it.
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Yeah, we just want to
encourage it to move on.
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OK, sorry. Spikes?
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Helen, that's barbaric.
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Oh, I'm not saying you stick
its head on a spike.
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Flashing lights?
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Well, well, well, we meet again.
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Oh, hey! Men's Shed man.
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Howard. Howard Muzzin.
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Thought I might run into you.
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I've been here since six.
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Have you? Have you got a dog?
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No, but you do.
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Yes.
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Kokaw! Rowr!
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Now, we do share kitchen
and bathroom facilities,
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And there's a pretty penny
to be made, too.
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Hallelujah, praise his name.
Let's go.
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She's developing quite the attitude.
I don't like it.
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I think you might
need to back off a bit.
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Me?
I meant we. Both of us.
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She's turned out to be
a pretty good probate lawyer.
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Well, I was her mentor.
Exactly.
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And the mentee is now mented.
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That is not a word.
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Munted?
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Point is, I think you and I - we -
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Pigeons.
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Some people have called them
the rats of the sky,
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and other cultures worship them.
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What do I think?
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Well, I think they're just nice.
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Thanks for watching Fisk.
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(LAUGHS)
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Captions by Red Bee Media
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Copyright Australian
Broadcasting Corporation
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