Original subtitles

♪ Country music singers

♪ Have always been a real close family ♪

♪ But lately some of my kinfolks ♪

♪ Have disowned a few others and me ♪

♪ I guess it's because I kind of changed my direction ♪

♪ Lord, I guess I went and broke their family tradition ♪

♪ Y'all know what to do Come on!

♪ Wanna know, Hank, why do you drink? ♪

Crowd: ♪ To get drunk

♪ Why do you roll smoke?

Crowd: ♪ To get stoned

♪ Why must you live out the songs that you wrote? ♪

♪ Over and over Whoo!

♪ Everybody makes my prediction ♪

♪ So if I get stoned

♪ I'm just carrying on an old family tradition ♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the great Nikki Bella!

[ Cheers and applause ]Thanks.

Nikki: All right. Let's give it up one more time

for Blake Shelton and his band.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Welcome to "Barmageddon".

[ Cheers and applause ]

And we've got this beautiful man behind the bar.

Everyone give it up for Carson Daly!

It's dark beer night.

Did you make this?

Yeah.

We're here at Blake Shelton's bar, Ole Red,

in one of the best cities in the world,

Nashville, Tennessee!

[ Cheers and applause ]

I say we meet the players.

Yes. Yes!

So he's been performing standup since he was 15.

He's a former SNL cast member.

Everyone make some noise for Jay Pharoah!

Carson: Oh, my God!Blake: Jay Pharoah's here!

[ Cheers and applause ]

It's really him!

It's really him!

From "The Karate Kid" and "Cobra Kai",

give it up for Sensei John Kreese himself,

Martin Kove!

Oh, my God, oh, my God!

[ Cheers and applause ]Hey, hey, hey.

He's real!

Blake, you can come to my dojo

anytime you want.

Forget the no mercy...

Just anytime.

Oh, my God.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Nikki: All right, guys.

We've found two people who are super famous on the Internet

for all the wrong reasons.

Who do we got?

So, Jay, you'll be playing with Jonsy,

and I think we all need to find out, Jonsy,

what did you do?

Let's take a look.[ Laughs ]

♪♪

Oh, you guys are about to see my horrible dancing.

♪♪

Who is -- Who is that guy?

Carson: He's dancing.

What are you doing?

♪♪

Hey! [ Car horn honks ]

[ Glass shatters ][ Crowd gasps ]

[ Laughter ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Hey, I'm sorry,

I'm actually glad they ran over your bike for that.

I actually got a lot of comments like that.

Yeah, yeah, you had that coming.

They were aiming for it.You had it coming.

You understand what I was doing, though, man?

I get what you was doing.

You was dancing and then somebody [Bleep] up

your...

[ Laughter ]

And here to help Martin mop up the competition is Kassandra.

Why are you here? Let's see.

♪♪

Uh-oh! What could go wrong here?

Another dancer.Oh, yeah.

Mopping it up, I see.Oh, I like this.

I actually like this.I like it.

[ Laughs ]

Hey! Hey!

Oh, work it!Oh, hey!

Oh! Oh.

[ Laughter ]

Ouch! Ouch, Kassandra!

Did you knock yourself out?

Oh.

Do you still twerk and clean at the same time?

I've improved the technique.

It got you to "Barmageddon", damn it.

Congratulations.Yeah, you're here.

Nikki: Exactly!You're here.

[ Cheers and applause ]Best fall of your life.

So, I say we all move up

to the balcony and play our first game.

Let's go! Whoo!

[ Cheers and applause ]

We're going up.Yeah!

[ Cheers and applause ]

What is this?All right, yeah!

Okay.

Let's go! Yeah!

Let's go, then. Yeah!

Let's --Martin and Jay are fired up.

Okay, so our first game of the night is Beer Bombs!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna give you 10 giant balls.

You're welcome.

Blake: Oh.

And it's your job to sink those balls into these 10 cups.

Our gold cup is worth 2 points,

and all the other cups are worth one.

So that huge arm is gonna try and swat your balls away,

and try to block you so don't let it.

Because if you get the ball in the cup, we remove it.

Got it. Let's play this.

Kassandra: All right.So we are gonna have a coinflip

to determine who goes first.

Jay, if you could give me a really good impression,

I'll let you call it.

You said heads? You want heads, right?

I say heads. Heads gonna hit.

Swear to God. We gonna beat the game.

Why? All day.

Swear to God.Kevin Hart.

Let's do it. Ah!

Let's go!

That's actually better than Kevin Hart.

All right. Let's see, but you got heads.

Jay: Oh-oh!Carson: All right.

Oh, oh!

You got heads. It's on, Nashville.

So do you guys want to go first or second?

You know what?

Out of respect, I'ma let Martin go first.

Thank you, my son.Hey, no problem.

[ Laughter ]

Well, I say we get Beer Bonged.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Swing that arm, let's get started.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Oh, right away, went right for it.

I love that.

Come on, Jay.

Oh, doing a ton.

Crowd: Oh!

All right, man. Denied.

Yep. All right, Kassandra.

♪♪

Carson: Oh.Blake: Wait for it.

Look at this, look at this.

[ Cheers and applause ]

1 point.

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Indistinct chatter ]

It's my star student.

Come on, Jonsy.

Oh.

Nice shot, Jonsy

All right, Martin. Let's see what you got.

Mercy's for the week.

Carson: Look at this.

Blake: Oh, come on.

[ Cheers and applause ]

That's Team Martin with 2 points so far.

So it shall be written and so it shall be done.

Jay. Jay.Let's go.

Jay, I think you're just overdressed for sports.

I'm overdressed for sports?

Maybe it's the jacket.Like, we swag over here.

You see this? You know what I'm saying?

Swag would be getting it in the cup.

Okay, love. I got you. I got you.

♪♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

Let's go!

That works.

You want to make it bloody?

Well, let's go.

It's 2 to 2. Kassandra, no pressure.

♪♪

Blake: Oh.Carson: Ohh!

You got this.

Oh.

Get this in.

Oh.

Hands going back, back to back.

Oh!

[ Cheers and applause ]

It's hot, it's hot.

What are we doing?

Absolutely phenomenal shot if I do say so myself.

Absolutely phenomenal.

[ Inaudible ]

President Trump, excellent shot.

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Speaking Spanish ]

That's Spanish.Cali-- okay.

Team Cobra Kai.

It's 3 to 3.

Jonsy, you can have you team take the lead right here.

How many have I made?None.

[ Laughs ]But we gonna change that.

You got it, bro. You got it.

Crowd: Aw.Oh, my goodness.

All right. Come on, Martin.

Like that first one.

Oh, watch this, watch this.

Crowd: Oh!

Nikki: Come on, Jay.

Blake: Throwing it one-handed again.

Crowd: Oh!

Jay: Watch this.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Watch that! Watch that.

Nothing but net!

You talking trash.Nikki: That's my girl.

That's my girl.

So we're gonna speed up the hand.

[ Cheers and applause ]

You got that. You got that, bro.

Oh!

Oh, god dang. Shoot.

You guys got 4 points.

They got 3 points,

so if you get one in, you could really kick their ass.

All right.

Oh. [ Laughs ]

No!

Kassandra: [ Laughs ]

[ Indistinct ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Laughs ]

You got to make these next three.

You're best revolutionary we've got.

Your sensei has taught you well.

They've got 5 points, and your team has 3.

Hey, hold on. Hold on real quick.

Hold on real quick. Let me get some [Indistinct].

Can I use this real quick? Can I use this?

Let me use this hat.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Turn into a Nashville star, baby, hold on.

Here we go. What you think?

What you think we doing?

Oh, he makes one.

[ Cheers and applause ]Let's go!

Team Jay has 4, Team Martin has 5.

Martin's up.

5-4. That's right.

And two cups left.

You could finish this game right here, right now.

So it shall be written, so it shall be done.

♪♪

Jay: Oh, no![ Cheers and applause ]

They won the game.

Team Martin has won the game with 6 points.

Team Jay, you've got 4.

I have got to overthrow you.

Jay: That's facts. I will call upon it later, sir.

Sorry, Team Jay, you've lost,

but it's not all lost because this is "Barmageddon",

and we like what's fun and not what's fair.

Right.

So if you want to even the score,

you can spin our Wheel of Redemption.

If you complete one of these challenges,

you can tie this game right here, right now.

So are you gonna be brave enough to spin this wheel?

Can we huddle up?

Yeah, let's huddle up. Let's huddle up.

[ Cheers and applause ]

All: [ Chanting ] Wheel, wheel, wheel,

wheel, wheel, wheel, wheel, wheel, wheel.

We're gonna --We're gonna

spin the wheel of death.We're gonna spin the wheel.

Yes!Gonna spin the wheel?

[ Cheers and applause ]Yes!

Wheel.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Blake: Let's go.

All: [ Chanting ] Wheel, wheel, wheel,

wheel, wheel, wheel, wheel.Nikki: ...Ring of Fire.

[ Chanting continues ]There could be hope.

Jay: Hey, I'm from the South, baby.

Pig's feet ain't nothing to me, pickled eggs is nothing,

or the Ring of Fire.

Look, my blood type is Satan.

He's called out your Wheel of Redemption.

I think you need to put some peppers.

He is, that son of a bitch.

That could be Hope.Carson: That could be Hope.

That could be Hope!

Oh, but it's not.

Crowd: Oh!

Ring of Fire.

Serrano peppers.

Hot serrano peppers.

This'll be nothing for you.

I -- I'm over 30, so I need Pepto Bismol.

So you know what I mean?

Hey, look, all y'all in y'all 20s.

Y'all look -- look, you've got a little bit left.

All them Flamin' Hot Cheetos and hot Takis,

that...gonna [Bleep] you up, okay?

I'm just letting you know.

This is Carson, this is for Blake.

It's gonna be 1-1 after you do this.

This is for "Barmageddon". Let's go, Nikki.

Nikki: Let's see it. Oh.Carson: Oh, my -- oh.

Do I put it back in there?

Yeah, you put it back in.Carson: Doesn't matter.

All right.How is it?

Blake: Look at Jay.[ Laughter ]

Look at Johnny.He needs some milk!

Do we have some almond milk for my boy over here?

How does it feel, Jon?

[ Mumbles ] Not good.

He can't even talk.Wait till tonight.

Blake: He already got a drink.

Take a drink, take a drink.

Well, they've completed the redemption,

which means now the score is tied 1 to 1.

We'll be right back. Don't you go anywhere.

Was that really a hot pepper? Was it hot?

No, it was really hot.

Yeah? It looked hot.

Blake: I can smell it.

Coming up --Shut up.

That look like a sperm from the South.

That's very provocative, the way you're holding that.

Show them, Barney.I was a cowboy

in my previous life.

Give me some [ Indistinct ].

[ Laughs ]

It's the first time in "Barmageddon" history.

Oh, shit.Thank you, my son.

So [Bleep] good.

He's hissing at me.

[ Laughter ]

Nikki: Welcome back to "Barmageddon",

the game with high stakes and low standards.

[ Cheers and applause ]Yeah, that's us.

Guilty as charged.

Currently our teams are tied each 1 point.

And the next game is a cross between pool,

fine art, and peekaboo.

It's Just the Tip.[ Laughter ]

I've been playing that game my whole life,

you know, since high school.

Just the tip?Yeah.

Oh. Yeah.

That was our theme at prom.

[ Laughter ]

I wonder what the outfit was for that.

A giant condom?

[ Laughter ]

Just -- any ways,

one team will go at a time.

And for inspiration, I will show them a picture.

Jonsy and Kassandra will channel their inner artist.

Jay and Martin, it's your job to guess

what the heck they're drawing.

And Blake and Carson are gonna help you both out.

I draw a good stick figure.Hey, that works.

All right, Jonsy, you're up.

Round 1. Let's begin.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Where do I got to be? Right here?

You got to get down on the tip, baby.

All right. One, two, three, let's go.

Oh, let's see what we got here.

Uh-oh.Carson: Come on, Jay.

That's a "O". All right.

It's a car. It's a wheel.

Is that a wheel? Is that an apple?

[ Laughter ]Is it cherries?

Good job.Oh, my God.

You got it right.[ Cheers and applause ]

Cherries. It's cherries.

That's you. That's you.

You drew -- That's a cherry.

Carson, that took you 11 seconds.

Jay: I would have not guessed that.

That look like a sperm from the South.

That's what that looking like.

I said, "Hey, I wouldn't have got it."

Look, I'm glad Carson here got that.

That was impressive. All right, Kassandra.

You're up, girl. Let's see what you got.

One, two, three.

All right.Now that's --

The clock's running, for God's sake.

What in the hell?

Is it --

A highway!

It's a -- It's a tree trunk.

Tree?

Yeah, an ocean, a house on an ocean.

Carson: Looks good so far.House on an ocean.

A lighthouse?Oh, my God, you got it.

You got it.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Just so [Bleep] good.

Are you kissing yourself?What was the time?

21 seconds.[ Laughter ]

Nikki: So because they were faster, at the end of Round 1,

Team Jay has managed to earn 1 point.

Carson: We're in the lead.

Now let's make our way into Round 2.

You all ready?Let's go.

Okay, Jonsy, you're back up.

That's very provocative the way you're holding that.

I was gonna say this is a family show, but it's not.

There's no better way of holding it.

All right. One, two, three.

Jonsy: Oh, all right.

It's a mushroom.Yeah, wait.

I like the --Wait, wait, wait.

Is that a dinosaur?

That's a good call.[Bleep]

It's a Stegosaurus?

That's what it is.Blake: Yes.

A Stegosaurus. Yes.

No, it's not, 'cause it's still going.

It's a taco.

Yeah!That is a [Bleep] taco!

[Bleep] taco.

That's what that is.It's a taco, bro.

Yo, the detail.

Let's go, Yonkers, let's go!

You got that in 22 seconds.

You got 22 there?That's 22 seconds.

Yep.

Nikki: Kasandra, are you ready? One, two, three.

Hold this grenade next.

Here we go. Here we go, Marty.

Yeah.We got --

That's a -- ice fishing.

Onion.It's a -- that's a --

What the fudge?

A tractor! Yes!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Martin: That's good.Carson: That's no fair.

Very good.

I kept looking at Blake 'cause I'm like, "He's gonna get this."

How is that a tractor? [ Laughs ]

You don't see the wheel?

I see one wheel.

Tractors have two wheels.

I think that looks like a tractor.

That's a Jenga piece and a grape.

I swear for Lord.

That's how I learned how to drive.

Jay: A tractor?Is it really?

Carson: All right. What was the time on that?

11 seconds. They won Round 2.

Yeah![ Cheers and applause ]

All right. So, I mean, this is obviously

way too easy for you all.

So on Round 3, we --

We're geniuses. [ Clears throat ] Sorry.

So, Blake and Carson, you're gonna be drawing

for your team this time, all right?

Oh, you guys are screwed.

But because it's you guys,

we got to do something a little different.

This time, I will only show them just the tip of a picture,

and every 15 seconds,

I'll show them a little bit more.

Whoever correctly guesses first will win the whole game.

By the way, this is the most --

Shut up!

This is the most work Carson Daly

has ever done in his life

is drawing this picture with a pool cue.

I have four jobs, my friend.[ Laughs ]

Come on.The most physical work.

This is the most physical work Carson's ever done.

Nikki: All right, Carson. Don't screw this up.

Carson: What is --

I mean, if you can't tell what that is,

something's wrong with you.

What? What are you drawing?

That's all I got so far.

Wait, what?Come on, you don't know

what that is?A face! A face!

That's an A-cup breast, I'll tell you that.

Ready?

You're gonna draw a face.Oh, my God.

That's a bee sting, as Kanye would say.

A seal's lip.

That's a seal's lip?A seal's lip.

Okay, all right.You're drawing --

Oh, I can tell what it is.What the hell?

I can tell what it is.

What? How?

What the [Bleep] is happening here?

If you guys can't figure this out,

something's wrong with you.

You know, are you ki-- are you guys seeing that?

That's a W.That's the Wu-Tang sign.

That's a W.That's the Wu-Tang sign

right there.All right, Carson,

Here's the last one.

Wait, Wu -- [ Laughs ]

Wait. Is that a kite?

God dang it. No, it's not a kite.

A dove? A dove?

What the -- hellfire? What is that?

[ Laughter ]

What -- oh, a flower? Or is it a --

Wait, hatching -- eggs hatching.

Blake: [ Laughs ] Eggs hatching.

A dinosaur?Easter?

That is a --

Martin: Yeah, it's a dinosaur.

Butterfly, butterfly!Yep, that's it!

That's what I'm talking about, Jonsy.

You got it.

What about that shit says butterfly?

A minute and seven seconds. Good job.

All right, Blake, you're up.

I got to make sure this thing's ready.

You just jerked off the pool stick.

[ Laughter ]You ready?

Give me something, Nikki. Come on.

All right.I already know

what this is.[ Laughs ]

I know what I'm gonna draw.

Hold up now. Dun, dun --

A whale! A whale.

Jay: [ Laughs ] That's not a whale.

A bridge.

Nikki: He's good.

Armadillo!Yes!

I knew it! I knew that's what it was gonna be.

Yes![ Cheers and applause ]

That's the end of the game, and Team Martin has won.

And Team Jay, what is wrong with you?

[ Laughter ][ Cheers and applause ]

But wait. We have another way for you to win.

You want me to spin the [Bleep] wheel?

[ Laughter ]

We have the Wheel of Redemption.

Okay, what's that?[ Crowd chanting "wheel" ]

We have Pig's feet, we have Pickled Eggs,

and we have that small sliver of Hope.

Spin the God dang wheel.

[ Chanting continues ]

Can I spin it or do you want to spin it?

Yeah, but you haven't done anything yet in this game.

Okay, cool.

Hope, come on, hope.

Hope, hope, hope.

Feet, feet, feet, feet, feet.

Stop! Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, we got Hope![ Cheers and applause ]

Oh, my gosh, he just hit the sliver of Hope.

That is the first time in "Barmageddon" history.

And you just got yourself an automatic point.

Now the game is tied.Oh!

Oh, all we gotta do is shit.

We don't got to do shit.

No pickled nuts for you.

It's a day off, son.

Good job. Geez.

[ Laughter ]

♪♪

I don't think Marty's actually that happy about it.

I think Marty wanted to see some pig's feet.

Yeah, I really wanted to see some, like, pig's feet.

No. They're gonna have to eat the pickled feet next round.

Y'all have seasoned salt?

You. You specifically.

I want you to eat it.Me?

Yeah, you will eat the shit.

Because you talk shit, I want you to eat a pickled egg.

I thought you were pure happiness.

Huh?♪ I love you

♪ You love me

Oh, Marty. Like that pig --

that purple dinosaur is --

Is that 'cause he's in a purple suit,

is that what you're saying?

I was thinking the same thing,

and I was like, "Should I?"

[ Laughs ]

She just called me Barney and got away with it.

[ Laughs ]

Hey, are you guys ready to play the next game?

Let's do it.Let's do this.

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right. We are back with more "Barmageddon".

After two games, the teams are tied each with 2 points.

Welcome to Barmageddon Lanes.

All the fun of bowling without the risk of athlete's foot.

In this game, each of you will play two frames.

You'll each to get to roll your ball twice per turn.

Since you both are Viral VIPs, like to make good choices,

Jonsy and Kassandra, you two will get right on in here.

So what do you all say we get this ball rolling?

Let's go!

This is Split Happens.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Hey, hold up. Where their bowling shoes at?

Okay. Okay.

All right.

You look like New Year's Eve.

[ Laughter ]

It seems cruel.

I think she knows how to do this.

She's pushing herself, look at her.

Yeah. She knows.

Martin: I've got a gladiator in this ball here.

Yeah, you do.

She's a gladiator.

All right. Ready, set, go.

All right. Let's go.

[ All cheering ]

Oh!

Oh!

Good job![ Cheers and applause ]

Oh. Woo-hoo.

I mean, what a champion.

Martin, you have a chance to pick up the spare right here.

All right.

You see where you've got to aim?

I've done this 550 times back in --

Oh, that's good.

I've done it at Blake's house.

You know, he's got 17 of these games.

All right. Come over here, let's bowl some people.

[ Laughs ] Yeah.[ Laughs ]

All right. Ready, set, go.

Come on!Go get it.

Come on!

Come on, girl!

You got it![ Cheers and applause ]

Jay: It's still standing!

It's still standing!They got the spare.

I don't wanna hear that shit.

You did it. Hold on, just take a breath.

Beat that, Barney.

Wow, the pile-on.

Team Jay, you're up.

Pimp walk -- Do I do the Denzel walk up here?

Yeah, yeah, just walk.All right. Okay.

Nikki: Oh, yeah. [ Laughs ]

The Denzel walk, that's the Denzel walk.

All right, ready?

Carson: Come on! Let's go.

Let's go, let's go.

Keep going!

Oh!Nikki: Oh.

Split!Martin: Same. Five, five.

That's okay. You can get a spare.

Go in for a another spare.

Carson: Oh, it's tight.

We need all your energy, Nashville.

[ Cheers and applause ]That's right.

Ready, set, go.

Let's go. Come on.

Come on, there it is!

Got it.[ Cheers and applause ]

All right. Now we're tied up each with 6 points.

Hold on. Get that camera over here.

Get the camera. Get the camera, God dang it.

Nikki: All right. Let's get started with Round 2.

Ready, set, go.

Blake: Come on.

Come on, let's go, let's go.

Push! Come on, into it!

[ Crowd cheers ]

Okay.Nikki: Oh.

Oh! Oh!Carson: That was good.

Two up.So we got three pins up.

Three pins down.

And do you guys think you can get the spare?

Yeah? All right.

Ready, set, go.

Carson: Come on, Kassandra.

Oh, God, look at her.Martin: Yeah!

Oh.

All: Oh!

Carson: Good job, Kassandra.

You all right?Yeah.

Before we start the final round,

the score is Team Martin with 11 points,

and you guys have 6.

So that means if you want to win this game,

you need to get a strike or spare.

But to tie it up, you need to get at least five pins.

In the words of Katt Williams' "Pimpin'",

"We gon make it do what it do."

Well, doing what it do, come on up.

Strike and it's over.Carson: Come on, Jonsy.

Makes your parents proud.

Ready, set, go.

Carson: Strike...Nikki: Oh.

Oh, guys, we're gonna have to get a spare.

Oh, no.

Jay, if you guys get the spare, you win.

If you have to throw up, aim for the hole right there.

Carson: Yeah, good call.

You don't want it rolling around in there with you.

Yeah.Blake would know.

Jay: He's in this thing bouncing like Cardi B.

It's great.

Ah.

[ Cheering ]

What the fudge?

Oh, oh.

Oh, no! He got stuck on the corner.

All right, everyone, Team Martin won again.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Martin: Come on, Jay. I'm real sorry, Barn.

All right. Sadly, Team Jay, yes, you have lost again.

But the Wheel of Redemption's got your back

if you're up for it, so what do you want to do?

Do you want to say yes to spinning the wheel?

[ Crowd chanting "wheel" ]

No.We got -- we doing this.

[ Cheers and applause ]

We've got Pig's Feet available

and Pickled Eggs available for you,

for your dining and dancing pleasure.

I want the eggs, bro.

I'm not even gonna lie. Those feet, a lot of bacteria.

Now you could just have some confidence and go,

"We're gonna win the next two games anyway."

We're gonna win those anyway,

but we want to stay, we want to --

Okay, fair enough.

[ Crowd chanting "wheel" ]

This is just good television.

Oh, it's gonna be feet.

It's gonna be feet.No. No!

Nikki: Oh, we've got Pig's Feet!

[ Crowd cheers ]

This is the most disgusting thing we have

on the Wheel of Redemption.

I want America to see the same reveal

that they're about to see.

Okay, you ready?

Oh, shit.

That's what they're about to eat.

Nikki: You guys only have to have a bite.

You don't have to eat the whole thing.

Martin: Barney will eat the whole thing. He's good.

Blake: Jonsy, you said you haven't eaten today.

Yeah, but, oh, my God, it's hard.

You can't even cut through it.

It's hard.

What type of pig from Wakanda is this shit?

[ Pigs feet squelch ]Oh, and it's making noises.

Boys, just pick it up with your hands and eat it.

Just like ribs.We're in Nashville.

How do you eat this shit?

There! Oh, my God!Oh, my God!

Oh, Jonsy, oh.

What is happening here?

Kassandra: Why'd he bite the toenail?

He bit the toenail.

Jay's -- Man up!Man up!

Nikki: All right?Ready?

[ Cheers and applause ]Ready.

Pig's feet. Come on now, Barney.

Nikki: Give it up for Virginia, Jay.

All right, Team Jay,

you did it so let's add a win to that score.

Our teams are tied with three wins each.

We will be right back.

I ate the toenail, I think --You ate the hoof.

Ugh!

Jay: It's bad.

It's like biting into rubber.

It's like I don't know if y'all watch "Dragon Ball",

but, like, Majin Buu it's like if you chewed him,

that's how that shit would taste.

[ Laughs ]

♪♪

This is "Barmageddon",

where we never estimate the importance of a party.

Now we've combined the fun of a paintball range

with the allure of the Wild West,

one of the most classic games in history.

It's H.O.R.S.E. on a Horse.

[ Cheers and applause ]

You'll be shooting at a wall full of targets.

You'll get three paintballs each turn

to try and spell the word "horse".

For each target you hit, you get a letter.

The first team to spell "horse" wins the game.

You don't have to call your shot, but if one of you

hits something, the next person has to it, too.

The first team to get all five letters wins the game.

All right, Team Jay, you ready for it?

Absolutely.Giddy up, boy.

Giddy up!Get up on the horse.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Look at him, look at that cowboy.

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Laughs ]Show 'em, Barney.

[ Applause ]

Carson: Oh!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Oh, he slapped his own butt.

Okay. Ready, set, giddy up.

[ Band playing "William Tell Overture: Final"]

Carson: Come on, Jay.

Blake: Here he goes.

♪♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

A little lower.

[ Paintball thuds ][ Cheers and applause ]

Oh!Carson: Oh, he hit it.

[ Cheers and applause ]Stop playing with me, son!

I was a cowboy in my previous life.

[ Laughs ]

I'm not that purple dinosaur.

Let's go. Let's go, baby.

Nikki: Martin, you got to get the can of beans, too.

All right. Giddy on up.

♪♪

Crowd: Oh!

It don't matter. Keep going.

[ Laughter ]

Crowd: Oh!

♪♪

Oh. [ Band stops ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Yeah, it's a little horse. It's good for Barney.

[ Laughter ]Barney knows how to ride.

[ Laughter ]

So Team Jay has an H.Give me my H, baby.

Team Martin got nothing.

H! We got H.

All right, Jonsy, you ready?

Hey, can I get somebody's hat?

Blake: Oh, here you go.

For America, Jonsy, for America.

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right. Giddy on up.

Come on. Let's go, horsey.

[ Laughs ]

♪♪

Crowd: Oh!

Martin: Well, hey, that's close.

♪♪

No, readjust.

[ Paintball thuds ]

Nikki: All right! He got the saloon.

Kassandra, you got to get the "saloon" sign, all right?

All right. I'll show you boys how to ride.

Let's go, Kassandra.I'm behind you, girl.

That's all shit out of the back of my truck, too.

I need some of that stuff back.

Hey, don't hit my whiskey bottle.

I can still get something out of that.

All right. We've got Team Jay with H-O, and Kassandra,

get that H. All right.

Oh, she's going gangster.Oh!

Giddy on up.

[ Crowd cheering ]

[ Paintball thuds ][ Cheers and applause ]

She got "saloon".

Carson: You're good, you're good.

All right, I think we need to get her off the horse.

Get your finger off the trigger.

My bad.

Don't worry, you can't get disqualified.

[ Laughs ]

When you see the prizes, you'll really be upset.

[ Laughter ]

Well, we've got Team Jay with H-O.

And now we've got Team Martin with an H.

All right, Jay, you're up.

Come on, Jay.

Look at them cowboy boots he's got on.

You can't put spurs on those shoes.

[ Laughter ]

What are you trying to hit over here?

Do you want me to tell you or you want me to do it?

[ Laughs ]

You know what? Giddy up.Jay: Giddy up.

Let's see what you got.

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Paintball thuds ][ Cheers and applause ]

Whoo!

Oh! Oh, wow.

All right. Well, we've got Team Jay with H-O-R.

Now Team Martin, Martin, you got to get that whisky bottle.

All right.

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right, Martin, You only got three shots

to get that whiskey bottle, okay?

Yeah.So giddy up.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Crowd: Oh!

Nope.

Oh!

One more shot.

Crowd: Oh!

Oh-oh!

Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho.[ Laughs ]

I was channeling my inner Cobra Kai,

and I hit it. What happened to you?

It's Barney's horse, man, what're you supposed to do?

It's not your fault, Marty. It's Barney's horse.

Jonsy, you're up.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Giddy on up.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Crowd: Oh!

[ Cheers and applause ]I hit it.

Did he hit the handle?He hit the handle.

[ Paintball thuds ]Crowd: Oh!

Oh!

Blake: I think he got into it.

Carson: Let's see what the cowboy says.

Looks good, Team Jay.

Wow. He got the S!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Okay. Now remember your team only has an H,

and you guys have an H-O-R-S. Giddy up!

[ Band playing "William Tell Overture: Final"]

You got to hit the blue cup.

You have to hit the cup.

A little lower.

Crowd: Oh!That's it.

[ Band stops ]

It's Barney's horse.[ Laughter ]

All right, Jay, you're up.

Oh, it's my turn?

Oh, here we go.

You hit one target, you win right here.

All right.

Ready? Giddy-up.

[ Band playing "William Tell Overture: Final"]

Oh! No hands.

[ Paintball thuds ]

Oh! Oh!

Team Jay wins. They officially win.

It's Barney's horse, man.

I'm affected.

You can't beat anyone on Barney's horse.

Carson: They've won again!

They've won again!

Oh, my God, he's doing the Electric Slide.

Barney is winning.Good work, Barn.

With that shot, Team Jay wins.

Big applause.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Okay. So Team Martin, there are no more chances

to earn any extra point with the Wheel of Redemption.

But there is one game left, so you won't want to miss it.

Yeah!

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

There you go.

Back in the day, I knew a little bit.

You play a little hoops?I played a little hoops.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Welcome back to "Barmageddon".

I am here with Jay and Martin,

and their teammates, Jonsy and Kassandra.

Okay. With one game left,

Team Martin has 3 points and Team Jay has 4.

And I hate to say it, but we only have one game left.

Aw.

Time flies when you're having beers.

It's time to play some Four Play.

[ Cheers and applause ]

You and your Viral VIP will take turns shooting hoops

into these gigantic whiskey barrel hoops.

The first one who can line up four in a row up and down,

side-to-side, or diagonally wins.

We'll play until there's a winner,

so I say let's play some Four Play.

Let's do it. Who's up?

Martin, you're up.Marty!

And I need you all to come on over.

Let's go, Marty.

So you're gonna have the blue balls.

Yes.

Perfect. And then Jay...Blue balls.

...you'll be here, all right.

All right. Take your time.

Martin: All right, baby.Come on, Marty.

Oh.Oh, it's a little short.

All right, Jay.

Make some noise, Nashville!

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Laughs ]

Oh, look at him getting loosey-goosey, look at that.

Should I do it with one, Blake, or two?

Which should I do it to?Well, one if it's possible.

One, all right.

All: Oh!

In-and-out heartbreak.

It's not possible.Jay: It's cool.

Now we know it's not possible.

It is.Carson: Look at this,

look at this.Miscalculating.

Oh![ Cheers and applause ]

Martin: That's my girl, that's my girl, yeah.

Kassandra!

Jay: You got it, bro.Kassandra: All right,

keep going, keep going.Blake: Come on, Jonsy.

Carson: Oh!These are --

Nikki: Both of you guys. Come on, Martin.

Oh. Too short. Almost.

Just short.It's all right.

Come on, Jay.

Hey, the foot, the foot, the foot!

Oh, look at her watching you.

Trust me, it don't mean shit, trust me.

She's an official, look at that.

She is.

Blake: Oh, look at this.Oh, no.

Crowd: Aw.

Oh, almost.

You got it, bro-bro.

Ah, in there. Swimwear, baby.

Here we go.Swimwear.

That's that Pee-Wee dance.

Crowd: Oh!We'll take it.

We'll take it.

We'll take it, God damn.

Oh no.

Carson: Go, Kassandra.

Oh, almost.

On the same one.

Same one, pee-wee squad.

Jay: It's all right, don't worry.

[ Cheers and applause ]

I gotta redeem myself, y'all.

All right.

No mercy.Nah, I know, right?

He doing some different shit.

No mercy.

Carson: Nice.[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Grunts ]Marty, great shot.

Okay.Come on, Jay.

What do I have to do? What do I have to do?

You'd want to get on top of it, yeah?

Carson: Money.Crowd: Oh!

We've got an intern in there just knocking them out.

Oh, that almost blocked it.

Crowd: Oh!

[ Laughs ]Whoa, baby girl, yeah!

Tie it up.2 and 2.

You got a 2.

[ Cheers and applause ]

That's it, one more in there.

So, what am I aiming for?

The orange one, because we don't want them to go --

Marty, you know what you got to do.

You got to block it.

You got to spoil their fun, Marty.

Jay: Oh, Marty.Oh!

Oh, Martin.

You could win the whole thing right here.

A lot of pressure.

All of Barmageddon, you could win.

Pressure don't work with me.

It's okay.

I see you over here getting closing and shit.

Just don't worry about it, because you can do it.

I can do it?Yeah, go ahead.

Thank you, brother.[ Hisses ]

He's hissing at me.[ Laughs ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

I thought that was supposed to be like your balls deflating.

Your ball has an air leak or something.

You can win the whole thing right here, Jay.

The whole thing.

Oh no.

Crowd: Oh!It worked.

Kassandra...The poison hiss worked.

...you know what you got to do, girl.

Carson: The curse.

The curse of the --Jay: I'm cursed, man.

Crowd: Oh!

All right, Jonsy, you can win it all right here.

[ Crowd cheering ]

Here's me redeeming myself.

For the game, let's hear it.

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

This is your moment.

Carson: One away.One away.

All right, Jonsy, you can win it all right here.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Here's me redeeming myself.

Let's go for the game. Come on --

For the game, let's hear it.

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

You got it! They won "Barmageddon".

They've won!

Team Jay just won "Barmageddon".

Oh, my gosh!

Your life will never be the same.

Your life will never be the same again.

It will never be the same again.

Yes! Amazing.

They were good.They were worthy opponents.

They were worthy.Great job, guys.

Thank you, thank you.

And the winner of Four Play with a total

of 5 points for the night --

Team Jay, you have won "Barmageddon".

Okay, Jonsy, since someone ran over your bike and your dreams,

you're getting a new bike reflector.

[ Bike bell dings ]

Congratulations, buddy.Oh!

Wow!They'll see you.

They'll see you.Wow!

[ Laughs ]They'll see you coming.

You're welcome.Wow, thank you.

You're welcome.Thank you.

You're welcome.Thank you, man.

And Jay, you now get to sport the hottest, trendiest,

most coveted medal in the world, our Cappy.

Come on up, sir.[ Cheers and applause ]

Carson: Look at you.Good job, captain.

Look at you.Dreams do come true.

It's like an Oscar.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Speech! Flava Flav.

Speech! A few words.

Mama, Mama Boonie.

[ Laughter ]

[ Speaking foreign language ]

Everybody that watches "The Color Purple" got that.

But if you didn't, you got research to do, White folks.

Come on.[ Laughter ]

I would just like to say,

I don't never really be winning nothing,

so it feels good to actually win.

And I got a shoutout to Jonsy

because for real, man, he came through

and clutched that last.Blake: Jonsy!

He did.

Hey, Jay, please wear

that as a belt buckle as you leave Nashville.

This one?Yeah, that'd be a great

belt buckle to wear to the airport.

Go like this.Look at that.

[ Laughter ]

I say, "Hey, hey, stop looking down [Bleep]"

[ Laughter ]

Nikki: Well, one more time for Jay and Jonsy, everyone.

[ Cheers and applause ]Congratulations.

[ Cheers and applause ]

You know what? If you look good,

you can come to Nashville and win.

Whoo! Whoo!

My hero.That's right.

And we got to give up one more time for Martin and Kassandra.

They did so good.[ Cheers and applause ]

He's a legend.Good work.

Man. You are

the Barmageddon legend.Nikki: Thank you, players,

so much, and our audience in Nashville,

you all were amazing.

And to everyone watching at home, you are the best.

Thank you so much.

We'll see you next time on "Barmageddon".

Barney won.Barney won.

Blake, take us home.

♪ Over and over, everybody makes my prediction ♪

♪ So if I get stoned and sing all night long ♪

♪ It's a family tradition

Whoo!

♪♪

♪♪