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00:02:01,851 --> 00:02:06,851
Subtitles by explosiveskull
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00:02:11,004 --> 00:02:14,472
Okay, what the fuck is going
on?
3
00:02:14,474 --> 00:02:16,574
Who are you people?
4
00:02:16,576 --> 00:02:17,775
Why are you covered in blood?
5
00:02:17,777 --> 00:02:19,610
Why do you have my gun?
6
00:02:19,612 --> 00:02:22,180
Why does my neck hurt, who tased
me?
7
00:02:22,182 --> 00:02:24,849
Kris, I fuckin' knew you killed
that kid.
8
00:02:24,851 --> 00:02:26,217
I knew you were crazy like that.
9
00:02:26,219 --> 00:02:27,953
I need answers and I need 'em
now!
10
00:02:27,955 --> 00:02:30,658
Shut the fuck up, sit down and
listen!
11
00:02:35,896 --> 00:02:39,097
Oh, my God, did you see
the look on Santa's face?
12
00:02:39,099 --> 00:02:41,265
I do think we made Santa's
naughty list.
13
00:02:41,267 --> 00:02:44,202
That's because your
guys' outfits are amazing.
14
00:02:44,204 --> 00:02:46,204
I should send
this Santa picture to Brian.
15
00:02:46,206 --> 00:02:47,639
No, don't even think about it!
16
00:02:47,641 --> 00:02:48,973
That ass clown hasn't called you
in weeks!
17
00:02:48,975 --> 00:02:49,807
We're so putting these up on
our
18
00:02:49,809 --> 00:02:51,710
fucking website for the world to
see.
19
00:02:51,712 --> 00:02:54,179
Okay, so I got the box,
Dahlia you got the wreath.
20
00:02:54,181 --> 00:02:55,482
What'd you get, Alexi?
21
00:02:56,717 --> 00:03:01,720
I totally chickened out, but
I bought green nail polish.
22
00:03:01,722 --> 00:03:02,686
Boring!
23
00:03:02,688 --> 00:03:04,055
Why are you the enemy of fun?
24
00:03:04,057 --> 00:03:05,924
I should just take all of
your Christmas presents
25
00:03:05,926 --> 00:03:07,925
and return them and wrap
you some coal instead.
26
00:03:07,927 --> 00:03:10,762
You know better than to
mess with me on Christmas.
27
00:03:10,764 --> 00:03:11,930
Oh, wait a sec.
28
00:03:11,932 --> 00:03:14,833
Um, is tomorrow the holiday
you've been talking about
29
00:03:14,835 --> 00:03:16,935
every fucking day since
Thanksgiving?
30
00:03:16,937 --> 00:03:19,037
Sure, tease me and then leave
me.
31
00:03:19,039 --> 00:03:20,871
It's bad enough that I have
to go to work right now.
32
00:03:20,873 --> 00:03:21,573
Work?
33
00:03:21,575 --> 00:03:23,073
Somebody's gotta pay the rent,
34
00:03:23,075 --> 00:03:24,910
unless your dad wants to cover
me?
35
00:03:24,912 --> 00:03:27,111
Well, what if I told
you rent was covered?
36
00:03:27,113 --> 00:03:28,913
And so's your shift.
37
00:03:28,915 --> 00:03:30,080
What?
38
00:03:30,082 --> 00:03:30,948
The only puppies you're gonna
39
00:03:30,950 --> 00:03:33,150
have to worry about today are
these.
40
00:03:33,152 --> 00:03:34,818
You're coming with us on an
adventure.
41
00:03:34,820 --> 00:03:35,654
Alright?
42
00:03:35,656 --> 00:03:36,591
Merry Christmas, bitch!
43
00:03:37,557 --> 00:03:39,056
You're crazy, you know that?
44
00:03:39,058 --> 00:03:42,192
Correction, we're fucking
crazy!
45
00:03:49,937 --> 00:03:54,305
Hello, devoted fans,
Sadie here and Dahlia.
46
00:03:54,307 --> 00:03:57,709
With our dear friend, Alexi.
47
00:03:57,711 --> 00:03:58,577
Hello!
48
00:03:58,579 --> 00:04:00,311
It's Christmas fucking Eve and
we're
49
00:04:00,313 --> 00:04:02,347
on our way to what might
be the most exciting
50
00:04:02,349 --> 00:04:04,682
urban exploring adventure in
history.
51
00:04:04,684 --> 00:04:07,818
So be sure to log on tomorrow
for the full official video.
52
00:04:07,820 --> 00:04:10,788
And you never know what dirty
things will come your way.
53
00:04:26,673 --> 00:04:27,542
Man.
54
00:04:37,116 --> 00:04:38,984
There you go.
55
00:04:38,986 --> 00:04:40,951
What is it you guys do
exactly when you're out there?
56
00:04:40,953 --> 00:04:43,121
You're telling me
you've never seen a single
57
00:04:43,123 --> 00:04:45,026
one of the Adventure Girls
videocasts?
58
00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:48,059
I did once, yeah.
59
00:04:48,061 --> 00:04:50,695
Okay, then, which adventure
was it?
60
00:04:50,697 --> 00:04:53,301
Uh, it was um, it was the
factory one.
61
00:04:55,635 --> 00:04:56,801
Abandoned water park?
62
00:04:56,803 --> 00:04:57,936
I know, I'm a terrible friend.
63
00:04:57,938 --> 00:04:59,203
I haven't watched any of them.
64
00:04:59,205 --> 00:05:00,071
What do you guys do?
65
00:05:00,073 --> 00:05:01,806
Well, I know you go break into
weird
66
00:05:01,808 --> 00:05:03,811
places and you film yourselves.
67
00:05:04,811 --> 00:05:07,979
But what is it that urban
explorers actually do?
68
00:05:07,981 --> 00:05:09,948
I mean, we just go to awesome
places,
69
00:05:09,950 --> 00:05:11,316
people don't dare go to.
70
00:05:11,318 --> 00:05:13,284
And film ourselves running
around.
71
00:05:13,286 --> 00:05:15,220
And then there's the
treasures.
72
00:05:15,222 --> 00:05:18,922
Yeah, we collect one keepsake
from each place we explore.
73
00:05:18,924 --> 00:05:21,960
Oh, so it's kind of like, um,
stealing?
74
00:05:21,962 --> 00:05:23,962
It's not stealing if it
doesn't belong to anyone.
75
00:05:23,964 --> 00:05:25,864
These places have been closed
forever.
76
00:05:25,866 --> 00:05:28,799
I hope Santa Land has some
amazing swag!
77
00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:30,068
So, while you guys are doing
all
78
00:05:30,070 --> 00:05:32,037
that awesome stuff, what am I
gonna do?
79
00:05:32,039 --> 00:05:34,239
Have the best fucking
Christmas ever!
80
00:05:34,241 --> 00:05:35,109
Woo!
81
00:05:39,779 --> 00:05:42,380
This is what I have to
do, I have to fucking pee.
82
00:05:53,726 --> 00:05:55,693
Well, it's 12:03, I guess it's
83
00:05:55,695 --> 00:05:57,397
socially acceptable to start
drinking.
84
00:06:02,101 --> 00:06:03,203
Classy joint!
85
00:06:15,916 --> 00:06:18,183
Hi, Merry Christmas!
86
00:06:18,185 --> 00:06:20,251
Oh, fuck Christmas!
87
00:06:20,253 --> 00:06:21,352
Isn't that right, Cherry?
88
00:06:21,354 --> 00:06:22,986
You heard him, girls.
89
00:06:22,988 --> 00:06:24,856
Fuck Christmas!
90
00:06:24,858 --> 00:06:25,724
What?
91
00:06:25,726 --> 00:06:26,961
Christmas is awesome!
92
00:06:37,938 --> 00:06:39,503
What'll it be?
93
00:06:45,311 --> 00:06:47,145
Merry Christmas, bitches!
94
00:06:47,147 --> 00:06:47,946
Oh, shit.
95
00:06:47,948 --> 00:06:49,780
Come on, all this shit you
just
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00:06:49,782 --> 00:06:52,150
buy into with Christmas, it's
just that.
97
00:06:52,152 --> 00:06:53,820
It's bullshit!
98
00:06:55,488 --> 00:06:57,789
This how you welcome
out-of-towners, Cherry?
99
00:06:57,791 --> 00:06:59,758
Can't be good for business.
100
00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:00,424
You know what?
101
00:07:00,426 --> 00:07:01,359
I think we better just go.
102
00:07:01,361 --> 00:07:03,994
Oh no, you're staying here
now, honey.
103
00:07:03,996 --> 00:07:05,763
Looks like you just made a
friend.
104
00:07:05,765 --> 00:07:07,832
You joining 'em for drinks,
Sean?
105
00:07:07,834 --> 00:07:08,999
I'm on the clock.
106
00:07:09,001 --> 00:07:09,936
Where's Jerry?
107
00:07:12,238 --> 00:07:13,772
For Christ's sake, Jerry!
108
00:07:13,774 --> 00:07:15,472
You've got to be kidding me!
109
00:07:15,474 --> 00:07:18,475
Jerry, you know your parole
officer said no costumes!
110
00:07:18,477 --> 00:07:19,779
What is this?
111
00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:23,049
So what'll it be, girls?
112
00:07:24,084 --> 00:07:26,987
Um, I think I'll have an
eggnog, please.
113
00:07:35,828 --> 00:07:37,130
Oh, yeah!
114
00:07:39,099 --> 00:07:39,965
You know what?
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00:07:39,967 --> 00:07:41,398
I think we're just gonna down
these
116
00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:42,302
and get the hell out of here,
okay?
117
00:07:43,537 --> 00:07:45,236
Man, I didn't touch any
fucking kids!
118
00:07:45,238 --> 00:07:46,871
I know, I know, okay.
119
00:07:46,873 --> 00:07:48,539
They just want me to take
you in for some questioning.
120
00:07:48,541 --> 00:07:50,140
Now, are you gonna cooperate or
are
121
00:07:50,142 --> 00:07:51,542
you gonna give me a hard time?
122
00:07:51,544 --> 00:07:54,445
Hey, he's been drunk
in my bar for two days.
123
00:07:54,447 --> 00:07:57,816
Only gets up to make a
mess in the bathroom.
124
00:07:57,818 --> 00:07:58,684
Some shit's been going down,
125
00:07:58,686 --> 00:08:01,219
so we're asking the usual
suspects.
126
00:08:01,221 --> 00:08:02,520
Pedophiles and such.
127
00:08:02,522 --> 00:08:03,987
I'm right fucking here, man!
128
00:08:03,989 --> 00:08:05,556
Oh, I'm sorry, Jerry.
129
00:08:05,558 --> 00:08:06,991
Sex offenders.
130
00:08:06,993 --> 00:08:10,460
Don't chase him out,
it's my one customer.
131
00:08:10,462 --> 00:08:11,799
That tips!
132
00:08:17,871 --> 00:08:19,837
I'm sorry to butt in,
133
00:08:19,839 --> 00:08:22,073
but you said some shit was going
down.
134
00:08:22,075 --> 00:08:23,277
Anything interesting?
135
00:08:24,344 --> 00:08:27,378
Uh, yeah, just some bear
attacks
136
00:08:27,380 --> 00:08:30,013
and some odd things around town.
137
00:08:30,015 --> 00:08:32,318
Ooh, bears, production value?
138
00:08:33,953 --> 00:08:36,156
Honestly, odd isn't the right
word.
139
00:08:37,057 --> 00:08:39,157
Look, I don't mean to
cause an alarm or anything,
140
00:08:39,159 --> 00:08:42,426
but some kids have been
murdered.
141
00:08:42,428 --> 00:08:43,927
Oh, my goodness!
142
00:08:43,929 --> 00:08:47,165
Hey, are you a ranger or a
cop?
143
00:08:47,167 --> 00:08:51,138
Well, yeah, I'm no cop,
but uh, I am packing.
144
00:08:54,540 --> 00:08:57,041
Shouldn't you be chasing
forest fires, not felons?
145
00:08:57,043 --> 00:08:58,012
Dahlia, shut up.
146
00:08:59,045 --> 00:09:01,378
Anyway, with everything
going on around town
147
00:09:01,380 --> 00:09:02,946
and it being Christmas and all,
148
00:09:02,948 --> 00:09:04,648
the police station's a little
understaffed
149
00:09:04,650 --> 00:09:07,384
and I know this forest
like the back of my hand.
150
00:09:07,386 --> 00:09:08,987
Sorry, we didn't mean to waste
your time
151
00:09:08,989 --> 00:09:11,122
or ask you all those silly
questions.
152
00:09:11,124 --> 00:09:12,389
No bother, ladies.
153
00:09:12,391 --> 00:09:14,325
I'd rather talk to you
than hunt down bears,
154
00:09:14,327 --> 00:09:16,628
but if you need anything
when you're in town
155
00:09:16,630 --> 00:09:19,967
or see anything suspicious,
don't hesitate to call me.
156
00:09:25,605 --> 00:09:26,604
Ooh, call me!
157
00:09:26,606 --> 00:09:27,604
Shut up!
158
00:09:28,507 --> 00:09:31,411
Okay, but seriously, kids
murdered?
159
00:09:32,279 --> 00:09:33,277
Maybe we should leave.
160
00:09:33,279 --> 00:09:35,079
Oh no, no, no, no, I
missed work for this.
161
00:09:35,081 --> 00:09:37,451
We are going on my first
Adventure Girls mission.
162
00:09:39,019 --> 00:09:39,919
Cheers.
163
00:09:40,620 --> 00:09:43,186
Hey, yes!
164
00:09:43,188 --> 00:09:45,023
That one is on me!
165
00:09:45,025 --> 00:09:47,026
Now, 20 bucks for the rest.
166
00:10:09,582 --> 00:10:11,585
It's not as Christmassy as I
expected.
167
00:10:13,218 --> 00:10:14,551
Looks creepy, though.
168
00:10:14,553 --> 00:10:16,356
Well, let's get started.
169
00:10:41,648 --> 00:10:43,580
So you ready for your
first big adventure?
170
00:10:43,582 --> 00:10:46,249
As ready as I'll ever be, yes!
171
00:10:46,251 --> 00:10:47,618
Wait, hold up,
soldier!
172
00:10:47,620 --> 00:10:48,286
What?
173
00:10:48,288 --> 00:10:49,487
We're gonna do this, right?
174
00:10:49,489 --> 00:10:53,023
Oh yeah, we're gonna do
this, but you're not ready yet.
175
00:10:53,025 --> 00:10:54,359
Shut up, of course, I am.
176
00:10:54,361 --> 00:10:55,325
I'm gonna have fun, come on!
177
00:10:55,327 --> 00:10:58,231
You're not ready yet, until...
178
00:11:03,035 --> 00:11:04,768
You put on your Christmas
uniform!
179
00:11:04,770 --> 00:11:06,336
Oh, my God!
180
00:11:06,338 --> 00:11:10,374
This is kind of hot looking,
but yeah, okay, okay.
181
00:11:10,376 --> 00:11:12,378
Yeah, it's better than being
an elf.
182
00:11:14,780 --> 00:11:16,482
I think it's cute.
183
00:11:20,786 --> 00:11:21,654
Yellow?
184
00:11:28,193 --> 00:11:29,529
White and purple?
185
00:11:34,634 --> 00:11:37,100
I like the blue one best.
186
00:11:37,102 --> 00:11:39,005
I think you're right, blue.
187
00:11:44,044 --> 00:11:46,710
Sadie, our little snowflake
is gonna have a meltdown
188
00:11:46,712 --> 00:11:49,312
when she sees what's inside
Santa Land.
189
00:11:50,183 --> 00:11:52,550
And, what do you think of my hot
elfness?
190
00:11:52,552 --> 00:11:54,484
Tomorrow when you go online to
see
191
00:11:54,486 --> 00:11:55,485
the full length video don't
forget
192
00:11:55,487 --> 00:11:57,687
to check out our pics
and like them if you do.
193
00:11:57,689 --> 00:11:59,623
And, I hope you do.
194
00:11:59,625 --> 00:12:00,494
Later!
195
00:12:01,827 --> 00:12:03,427
Did I get it right this time?
196
00:12:03,429 --> 00:12:04,698
Yeah, you're a natural.
197
00:12:06,799 --> 00:12:09,233
Maybe I should call Brian and
let him know where we are.
198
00:12:09,235 --> 00:12:10,104
No!
199
00:12:15,140 --> 00:12:16,106
It's Christmas Eve, what if he
200
00:12:16,108 --> 00:12:17,207
tries to get in touch with me?
201
00:12:17,209 --> 00:12:18,276
He hasn't called you in
forever.
202
00:12:18,278 --> 00:12:19,676
Why would you call him now?
203
00:12:19,678 --> 00:12:20,744
He doesn't deserve you!
204
00:12:20,746 --> 00:12:21,612
But...
205
00:12:21,614 --> 00:12:23,250
Ho, ho, ho, let's go!
206
00:12:39,765 --> 00:12:41,331
Awesome!
207
00:12:41,333 --> 00:12:42,800
Merry fucking Christmas!
208
00:12:42,802 --> 00:12:43,667
Wow.
209
00:12:43,669 --> 00:12:45,302
You know, I thought this place
would be
210
00:12:45,304 --> 00:12:47,271
a lot more old and decrepit
looking for
211
00:12:47,273 --> 00:12:49,276
the amount of years it's been
abandoned.
212
00:12:51,274 --> 00:12:53,210
Don't get me wrong, I
still wanna check it out.
213
00:12:53,212 --> 00:12:55,213
Don't run, you can't outrun
it.
214
00:12:55,215 --> 00:12:57,581
If it's too late to back
away, grab a weapon,
215
00:12:57,583 --> 00:12:58,816
any weapon, to protect yourself.
216
00:12:58,818 --> 00:13:02,652
If without weapons or pepper
spray, curl up and play dead.
217
00:13:02,654 --> 00:13:04,721
Just reading off things to
do in case of a bear attack.
218
00:13:04,723 --> 00:13:06,423
Is that your idea of fun,
219
00:13:06,425 --> 00:13:07,657
trying to scare the crap out of
us?
220
00:13:07,659 --> 00:13:09,730
I am just being the voice of
reason.
221
00:13:11,563 --> 00:13:14,798
Meet my taser, my voice of
reason.
222
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,803
On that note, I think we're
ready.
223
00:13:24,443 --> 00:13:25,909
Whoo!
224
00:13:25,911 --> 00:13:27,814
Welcome to Santa Land!
225
00:13:38,757 --> 00:13:43,129
Cool, the most magical
Christmas Eve land of all.
226
00:13:44,429 --> 00:13:47,101
And the Adventure Girls
are gonna explore it!
227
00:13:53,606 --> 00:13:55,342
Dahlia, go Dahlia!
228
00:14:01,447 --> 00:14:03,781
You're not gonna make it on
heels.
229
00:14:03,783 --> 00:14:08,789
Oh wait, watch out, watch out.
230
00:14:20,866 --> 00:14:22,800
What do I know about Santa
Land?
231
00:14:22,802 --> 00:14:24,201
Yeah, tell
me something about it.
232
00:14:24,203 --> 00:14:26,436
Well, it's been closed for 20
years.
233
00:14:26,438 --> 00:14:28,572
I heard kids died here.
234
00:14:28,574 --> 00:14:29,540
The only people that come here
now
235
00:14:29,542 --> 00:14:31,242
are crack heads and meth heads.
236
00:14:31,244 --> 00:14:32,542
Oh, my God, what's this?
237
00:14:32,544 --> 00:14:33,677
Oh, awesome!
238
00:14:33,679 --> 00:14:37,885
I wanna eat this mushroom
and then get twice as big.
239
00:14:38,885 --> 00:14:40,817
Don't let me fall.
240
00:14:40,819 --> 00:14:42,987
Let's go find something else.
241
00:14:42,989 --> 00:14:44,888
Oh, my God, you guys!
242
00:14:46,726 --> 00:14:48,428
Would you like some tea?
243
00:14:59,805 --> 00:15:02,873
Someone's gotta tell her
to stop humping things.
244
00:15:02,875 --> 00:15:03,844
It's not sexy.
245
00:15:07,013 --> 00:15:09,013
Oh no, I'm a naughty girl!
246
00:15:09,015 --> 00:15:10,417
Don't try this at home.
247
00:16:04,303 --> 00:16:05,304
Hello?
248
00:16:06,905 --> 00:16:08,806
Any bears in here?
249
00:16:08,808 --> 00:16:10,010
Werewolves?
250
00:16:10,909 --> 00:16:11,978
Unicorns?
251
00:16:13,913 --> 00:16:14,781
Al Qaeda?
252
00:16:18,518 --> 00:16:19,383
No, but other things live in
253
00:16:19,385 --> 00:16:21,722
the forest like birds and
squirrels.
254
00:16:23,755 --> 00:16:26,525
And bears, child-eating bears.
255
00:16:39,105 --> 00:16:41,339
Okay.
256
00:17:00,659 --> 00:17:02,529
Welcome to candy cane
land!
257
00:17:05,931 --> 00:17:07,764
Don't you feel like we're
being watched?
258
00:17:07,766 --> 00:17:08,765
Are we?
259
00:17:08,767 --> 00:17:11,034
Yeah, I kind of do feel
like I'm being watched.
260
00:17:12,104 --> 00:17:13,704
Is that your new ringtone,
sicko?
261
00:17:13,706 --> 00:17:15,438
- Yes.
- Oh, my God!
262
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:16,940
We'll see who's laughing when
you're
263
00:17:16,942 --> 00:17:18,975
hog-tied and squealing for my
help.
264
00:17:18,977 --> 00:17:20,945
Ooh, you've gotta problem now!
265
00:17:20,947 --> 00:17:23,483
Stop it, you're gonna
fuck up my makeup, geez!
266
00:17:31,990 --> 00:17:34,760
At this point I don't think
it makes any difference.
267
00:17:35,961 --> 00:17:36,862
I found Jerry.
268
00:17:37,996 --> 00:17:40,534
He was getting wasted at
Cherry's just like Sean said.
269
00:17:41,501 --> 00:17:44,502
Neil, what the hell are you
doing?
270
00:17:44,504 --> 00:17:46,936
There is no way in hell that
this guy could have done it!
271
00:17:46,938 --> 00:17:48,742
Now, cut him loose!
272
00:17:49,941 --> 00:17:51,708
Come on, Jerry.
273
00:17:51,710 --> 00:17:52,778
Sorry about this.
274
00:17:53,813 --> 00:17:54,811
Merry Christmas.
275
00:17:54,813 --> 00:17:55,678
Get out of here.
276
00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:56,813
Fuck you, Jerry.
277
00:17:56,815 --> 00:17:58,017
See you at poker.
278
00:18:04,657 --> 00:18:06,490
What is it?
279
00:18:06,492 --> 00:18:08,528
I was just thinking about the
Bernards.
280
00:18:09,562 --> 00:18:11,195
I mean, seeing her lying there
like that,
281
00:18:11,197 --> 00:18:14,098
in all that blood with
her heart ripped out.
282
00:18:20,739 --> 00:18:21,605
It was...
283
00:18:21,607 --> 00:18:22,473
Disgusting.
284
00:18:22,475 --> 00:18:23,142
It was gross.
285
00:18:24,910 --> 00:18:27,445
What kind of monster could
do something like that?
286
00:18:27,447 --> 00:18:29,649
Officer Green seems
to think it was a bear.
287
00:18:32,752 --> 00:18:34,087
A bear with a lot of anger.
288
00:18:35,053 --> 00:18:36,523
A lot of hurt feelings.
289
00:18:38,724 --> 00:18:41,061
You know, Neil, I'm a
little worried about you.
290
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:43,226
You hang in there, kid.
291
00:18:43,228 --> 00:18:44,797
Alright, good luck.
292
00:18:45,765 --> 00:18:47,566
Be back in a couple
hours.
293
00:19:09,889 --> 00:19:12,426
Ugh, looks like someone
got slaughtered here.
294
00:19:14,494 --> 00:19:15,892
I am dreaming!
295
00:19:15,894 --> 00:19:17,561
It's perfect!
296
00:19:17,563 --> 00:19:19,196
What, I can't see
anything.
297
00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:21,732
Our treasures, they're inside.
298
00:19:24,970 --> 00:19:26,072
Jackpot!
299
00:19:27,806 --> 00:19:29,138
Oh, I want this one!
300
00:19:29,140 --> 00:19:30,009
Look!
301
00:19:30,843 --> 00:19:33,577
Here's your first treasure,
Lexi.
302
00:19:33,579 --> 00:19:34,744
Um, that's okay?
303
00:19:34,746 --> 00:19:35,980
You're saving it from a
bulldozer
304
00:19:35,982 --> 00:19:37,951
in a few months, of course, it's
okay.
305
00:19:39,150 --> 00:19:42,119
Hey Adventure Girl people,
fans!
306
00:19:42,121 --> 00:19:43,786
Hey guys, look, we got our
shit.
307
00:19:43,788 --> 00:19:46,559
We gotta get the fuck out of
here before our luck runs out.
308
00:19:47,627 --> 00:19:49,930
Wait, hey guys, we didn't go
there yet.
309
00:20:15,955 --> 00:20:19,092
Okay, point taken and rejected.
310
00:20:53,626 --> 00:20:58,632
Oh, look!
311
00:21:07,974 --> 00:21:09,242
Whoa.
312
00:21:17,182 --> 00:21:18,715
Ha, I dare you to eat this.
313
00:21:18,717 --> 00:21:20,016
Oh no, that's gross.
314
00:21:20,018 --> 00:21:22,988
Come on, the audience awaits.
315
00:21:28,761 --> 00:21:29,459
I dare you!
316
00:21:29,461 --> 00:21:31,294
I don't think so, it's nasty.
317
00:21:31,296 --> 00:21:32,830
Nom, nom, nom.
318
00:21:32,832 --> 00:21:33,664
Uh-uh.
319
00:21:33,666 --> 00:21:34,999
What happened here?
320
00:21:35,001 --> 00:21:37,767
Ugh, a fucked up ice orgy?
321
00:21:37,769 --> 00:21:39,936
Oh, that's a good name for our
band.
322
00:21:39,938 --> 00:21:41,138
Oh!
323
00:21:44,744 --> 00:21:45,812
What is it?
324
00:22:41,100 --> 00:22:42,702
Krampus!
325
00:22:46,037 --> 00:22:47,337
What the fuck is it?
326
00:22:47,339 --> 00:22:49,943
Get the hell outta here now!
327
00:22:58,350 --> 00:22:59,218
Fuck!
328
00:23:00,719 --> 00:23:04,790
In the cottage, now!
329
00:23:12,098 --> 00:23:13,030
What the hell do we do now?
330
00:23:13,032 --> 00:23:14,300
Good idea, call 911!
331
00:23:16,034 --> 00:23:17,134
It's me.
332
00:23:17,136 --> 00:23:18,836
What, what does she mean it's
me?
333
00:23:18,838 --> 00:23:19,637
Who the hell are you calling?
334
00:23:19,639 --> 00:23:21,370
Brian, we're in
danger!
335
00:23:21,372 --> 00:23:22,238
Brian?
336
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:23,108
- Gimme that!
- No!
337
00:23:30,349 --> 00:23:31,184
Hello?
338
00:23:32,083 --> 00:23:33,018
He hung up.
339
00:23:33,986 --> 00:23:35,284
It's been like this all day.
340
00:23:35,286 --> 00:23:36,422
Get out of...
341
00:23:39,190 --> 00:23:40,791
911, what's your emergency?
342
00:23:40,793 --> 00:23:42,861
Hi, yeah, I think we're being
attacked!
343
00:23:44,496 --> 00:23:46,265
Oh God, another one.
344
00:23:48,467 --> 00:23:49,532
Okay, stay calm.
345
00:23:49,534 --> 00:23:51,167
Where are you located?
346
00:23:51,169 --> 00:23:52,138
Santa Land.
347
00:23:54,140 --> 00:23:58,074
Santa Land, off the 56, but
that was shut down years ago.
348
00:23:58,076 --> 00:24:00,077
Yes, yes, that one.
349
00:24:03,849 --> 00:24:05,851
Alright, and who's attacking
you?
350
00:24:07,186 --> 00:24:11,288
I don't know, some big, hairy
thing!
351
00:24:17,028 --> 00:24:18,462
A bear or something!
352
00:24:18,464 --> 00:24:21,999
And a man, I think he's the
owner.
353
00:24:22,001 --> 00:24:23,266
Let me get this straight.
354
00:24:23,268 --> 00:24:27,804
You're in Santa Land,
so you are trespassing.
355
00:24:27,806 --> 00:24:30,307
No, no, we're just...
356
00:24:30,309 --> 00:24:32,975
I smell gingerbread!
357
00:24:32,977 --> 00:24:34,077
Hurry!
358
00:24:34,079 --> 00:24:35,512
Is this some kind of practical
joke?
359
00:24:35,514 --> 00:24:36,980
No, no, we're...
360
00:24:36,982 --> 00:24:40,317
Is anybody actually
injured or in danger?
361
00:24:40,319 --> 00:24:42,019
No, we're fine!
362
00:24:42,021 --> 00:24:44,924
But that is only because we're
barricaded in his cottage!
363
00:24:47,059 --> 00:24:49,025
A bear sent you into his
cottage?
364
00:24:49,027 --> 00:24:51,093
Listen, who do you think you
are?
365
00:24:51,095 --> 00:24:53,996
You're trying to pull
some kind of shit on me
366
00:24:53,998 --> 00:24:55,933
and you should be ashamed
of yourself, okay,
367
00:24:55,935 --> 00:24:59,069
because tonight it's Jesus'
birthday, so goodbye!
368
00:25:00,906 --> 00:25:01,571
Asshole!
369
00:25:01,573 --> 00:25:03,607
Hung up on me!
370
00:25:03,609 --> 00:25:06,577
Oh, we're fucking fucked.
371
00:25:06,579 --> 00:25:07,813
We're fucking fucked.
372
00:25:20,592 --> 00:25:22,094
Sadie, help us!
373
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:31,100
Now, let's try to arm
ourselves, okay?
374
00:25:31,102 --> 00:25:32,002
Yeah.
375
00:25:32,004 --> 00:25:32,871
Okay.
376
00:25:36,876 --> 00:25:38,609
Hi, please don't hang up!
377
00:25:38,611 --> 00:25:41,878
Okay, we're trapped inside Santa
Land.
378
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:45,485
Our van got towed and we have
no way of getting out of here!
379
00:25:46,552 --> 00:25:49,222
This is 911, not a car
service.
380
00:25:51,990 --> 00:25:54,359
Why do they keep doing that?
381
00:26:34,099 --> 00:26:35,098
Stop it, now!
382
00:26:35,100 --> 00:26:37,033
Come on, would you stop it now?
383
00:26:37,035 --> 00:26:37,937
Stop it.
384
00:26:42,041 --> 00:26:42,974
Ow!
385
00:26:42,976 --> 00:26:44,974
What are you gonna do you fat
fuck, huh?
386
00:26:44,976 --> 00:26:46,510
I'm not fat, you're fat.
387
00:27:01,459 --> 00:27:03,359
Now, that's enough!
388
00:27:03,361 --> 00:27:04,229
Sit.
389
00:27:11,269 --> 00:27:13,637
That should keep him out for
now.
390
00:27:13,639 --> 00:27:14,671
What the hell was that?
391
00:27:14,673 --> 00:27:17,174
You know, I'm very
disappointed in you girls.
392
00:27:17,176 --> 00:27:19,376
All of you have bee very
naughty.
393
00:27:19,378 --> 00:27:21,378
You've been trespassing on my
property
394
00:27:21,380 --> 00:27:23,045
and you're fucking my shit up!
395
00:27:23,047 --> 00:27:24,583
That's our motto!
396
00:27:25,717 --> 00:27:27,617
We weren't trespassing on your
property,
397
00:27:27,619 --> 00:27:29,252
we were just exploring.
398
00:27:29,254 --> 00:27:31,088
Oh, enough of this
bullshit, I don't care.
399
00:27:31,090 --> 00:27:33,389
You guys gotta get out of here.
400
00:27:33,391 --> 00:27:36,659
Go in to town, take my
bike, and get your van.
401
00:27:36,661 --> 00:27:37,627
Fuck that!
402
00:27:37,629 --> 00:27:39,061
There's some Bigfoot out there
403
00:27:39,063 --> 00:27:40,696
and we're not calling the
police?
404
00:27:40,698 --> 00:27:43,002
Yeah, forget it, I'm calling
Sean.
405
00:27:46,138 --> 00:27:47,540
This is not for the police.
406
00:27:49,173 --> 00:27:51,041
Hillbillies are crazy!
407
00:27:51,043 --> 00:27:53,079
I'm not a hillbilly, you're a
hillbilly.
408
00:27:54,580 --> 00:27:56,013
I don't know who's crazier,
409
00:27:56,015 --> 00:27:58,314
this magician, or that
wildebeest.
410
00:27:58,316 --> 00:28:01,752
But, I am reporting your ass
to the ASPCA, just so you know.
411
00:28:01,754 --> 00:28:04,290
Okay, hold on, just
hold on for a second.
412
00:28:06,158 --> 00:28:07,126
I need to explain.
413
00:28:12,096 --> 00:28:14,196
I don't know how to say this.
414
00:28:14,198 --> 00:28:16,132
I never thought I'd have to say
this.
415
00:28:16,134 --> 00:28:18,267
Spit it out, already!
416
00:28:18,269 --> 00:28:19,471
Would you listen!
417
00:28:20,773 --> 00:28:22,175
This is my property
418
00:28:24,476 --> 00:28:25,578
and I'm Santa.
419
00:28:27,246 --> 00:28:29,381
Hence, Santa Land.
420
00:28:30,681 --> 00:28:34,083
I'm the real fucking deal,
Santa.
421
00:28:34,085 --> 00:28:37,723
And that thing out
there, that is no animal.
422
00:28:40,092 --> 00:28:41,259
That's Krampus.
423
00:28:45,831 --> 00:28:46,698
Krampus?
424
00:28:48,499 --> 00:28:49,368
Krampus.
425
00:28:50,334 --> 00:28:51,203
Krampus!
426
00:28:52,504 --> 00:28:55,539
Oh, goddamn it, I'm
Santa and that's Krampus!
427
00:28:55,541 --> 00:28:57,043
The devil of Christmas!
428
00:29:02,081 --> 00:29:02,782
Krampus!
429
00:29:07,252 --> 00:29:09,718
And I'm the fucking tooth
fairy.
430
00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:11,620
Oh yeah, that's really
adorable.
431
00:29:11,622 --> 00:29:13,657
Oh, if you only knew.
432
00:29:20,698 --> 00:29:22,034
Want a cookie?
433
00:29:28,372 --> 00:29:29,438
Come on!
434
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:30,809
911, what's your emergency?
435
00:29:32,244 --> 00:29:33,111
Where?
436
00:29:33,812 --> 00:29:35,111
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
437
00:29:35,113 --> 00:29:35,980
Come on.
438
00:29:35,982 --> 00:29:37,080
You've gotta speak slower I
can't...
439
00:29:37,082 --> 00:29:41,584
- Where did you find the body?
- Sit down, sit down!
440
00:29:41,586 --> 00:29:43,653
Another damn body, Bruce!
441
00:29:43,655 --> 00:29:46,523
Missing kids, prank calls!
442
00:29:46,525 --> 00:29:48,724
I just can't take this anymore.
443
00:29:48,726 --> 00:29:51,628
Yes, honey, I'm here, I'm still
here.
444
00:29:51,630 --> 00:29:53,463
- We'll send you somebody...
- Son of a bitch!
445
00:29:53,465 --> 00:29:56,265
Right away,
just give us the address.
446
00:31:31,929 --> 00:31:34,266
Oh, he's a beast, alright.
447
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:37,333
If you only knew.
448
00:31:37,335 --> 00:31:39,671
He's also part man and part
devil.
449
00:31:40,938 --> 00:31:42,742
Krampus is a killer!
450
00:31:44,543 --> 00:31:45,911
He's also my fucking partner.
451
00:31:46,812 --> 00:31:47,811
Can Santa say fuck?
452
00:31:47,813 --> 00:31:49,846
No, that is what
redneck freaks say before
453
00:31:49,848 --> 00:31:52,618
they hang you on meat hooks as
decoration.
454
00:31:53,986 --> 00:31:56,719
Okay, Santa Claus, we're gonna
leave you
455
00:31:56,721 --> 00:31:58,521
and your killer Wookie here
alone
456
00:31:58,523 --> 00:32:00,756
and we're gonna get the hell out
of here.
457
00:32:00,758 --> 00:32:04,628
Alexi, did you not see that
little spectacle over there?
458
00:32:04,630 --> 00:32:07,265
Did you not see my magic cane?
459
00:32:07,999 --> 00:32:10,669
Santa doesn't walk around with
a cane.
460
00:32:11,736 --> 00:32:14,337
The cane comes with me,
not that your folklore
461
00:32:14,339 --> 00:32:18,007
ever covers that because no
one's ever seen me in action.
462
00:32:18,009 --> 00:32:19,243
Did you just call me Alexi?
463
00:32:19,245 --> 00:32:24,417
Yes, you are Alexi and you
are Dahlia and you are Sadie.
464
00:32:28,519 --> 00:32:31,788
He's some stalker fan, I knew
it.
465
00:32:31,790 --> 00:32:34,424
Wait, have you been creeping
on us this whole time?
466
00:32:34,426 --> 00:32:36,493
Ever since you were born.
467
00:32:36,495 --> 00:32:37,494
Gross!
468
00:32:37,496 --> 00:32:40,429
Oh, come on stop it,
you're wasting my time!
469
00:32:40,431 --> 00:32:42,701
I've been in all your houses at
Christmas!
470
00:32:44,436 --> 00:32:47,670
What is it gonna take,
huh, for you to believe me?
471
00:32:47,672 --> 00:32:50,407
Do I have to take flight,
presents magically appear?
472
00:32:50,409 --> 00:32:51,907
What do you want, what do you
want?
473
00:32:51,909 --> 00:32:53,042
What do you want?
474
00:32:53,044 --> 00:32:57,446
Well, if you're really
Santa you'd know what I want.
475
00:32:57,448 --> 00:32:59,916
Fine!
476
00:33:03,588 --> 00:33:04,490
Oh, my God, yay!
477
00:33:36,388 --> 00:33:37,055
So.
478
00:33:42,727 --> 00:33:45,664
Santa, how do you fit down the
chimney?
479
00:33:47,599 --> 00:33:48,734
Magic, of course.
480
00:33:50,901 --> 00:33:52,836
Krampus also uses the chimney,
481
00:33:52,838 --> 00:33:54,840
that's why I blocked mine just
in case.
482
00:33:55,841 --> 00:33:57,540
Ha, ha, I know what you're
thinking.
483
00:33:57,542 --> 00:34:00,476
What about the houses without
chimneys?
484
00:34:00,478 --> 00:34:02,678
I've got other ways of getting
in.
485
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:04,914
I'm telling you not everyone is
486
00:34:04,916 --> 00:34:08,016
so pleased to see me pay a
visit.
487
00:34:08,018 --> 00:34:09,919
Here, look at this.
488
00:34:10,822 --> 00:34:11,687
Yeah.
489
00:34:11,689 --> 00:34:13,055
Nice!
490
00:34:13,057 --> 00:34:14,090
How do you get to everybody
491
00:34:14,092 --> 00:34:16,760
in the world in just one night?
492
00:34:16,762 --> 00:34:18,495
More magic.
493
00:34:18,497 --> 00:34:20,562
You see, he only gets the bad
ones.
494
00:34:20,564 --> 00:34:23,535
And I'm talking, the really bad
children.
495
00:34:24,970 --> 00:34:27,604
How do you make those reindeer
fly?
496
00:34:27,606 --> 00:34:29,075
Magic!
497
00:34:31,843 --> 00:34:32,975
Wait a second!
498
00:34:32,977 --> 00:34:34,943
Where are your reindeer?
499
00:34:34,945 --> 00:34:37,914
And where's Mrs. Claus
and where are your elves?
500
00:34:37,916 --> 00:34:40,619
Why don't you tell me how
you walk in those heels?
501
00:34:42,787 --> 00:34:43,919
Magic.
502
00:34:43,921 --> 00:34:45,055
Right.
503
00:34:45,057 --> 00:34:47,557
See now that's all you really
need to know about that.
504
00:34:47,559 --> 00:34:48,758
Yeah, yeah, we get it.
505
00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:50,595
He's bad news, ooh!
506
00:34:58,936 --> 00:35:02,905
My personal story is just not
as
507
00:35:02,907 --> 00:35:05,076
charming as the one that you
know of.
508
00:35:14,452 --> 00:35:17,055
There's no such thing as
a naughty or nice list.
509
00:35:18,490 --> 00:35:22,727
I bring you presents, but
Krampy shreds your ass.
510
00:35:26,530 --> 00:35:30,503
In the '40s your culture banned
Krampus.
511
00:35:31,470 --> 00:35:33,870
God forbid they should scare a
512
00:35:33,872 --> 00:35:36,039
little morality into the
children.
513
00:35:36,041 --> 00:35:39,008
Krampus was out of the
picture in society's eyes.
514
00:35:39,010 --> 00:35:43,646
And you know, quite honestly,
they didn't need me anymore.
515
00:35:43,648 --> 00:35:46,015
Toys were made in factories.
516
00:35:46,017 --> 00:35:50,423
Presents bought, Santa's sit
on their fat asses in malls.
517
00:35:51,555 --> 00:35:54,126
A tough decision, but I
wasn't needed anymore.
518
00:35:55,894 --> 00:35:59,028
So I started this place
so that I could see
519
00:35:59,030 --> 00:36:01,731
the joy in the children's eyes
once again.
520
00:36:01,733 --> 00:36:03,769
I had very high hopes for it,
but...
521
00:36:05,003 --> 00:36:05,869
I've been fighting a losing
battle
522
00:36:05,871 --> 00:36:07,937
to hold on to this land mainly
because
523
00:36:07,939 --> 00:36:09,972
I've got Krampus frozen out
there.
524
00:36:09,974 --> 00:36:12,844
Had, had Krampus frozen out
there.
525
00:36:18,782 --> 00:36:22,086
Now, you can take Santa out of
Christmas,
526
00:36:24,122 --> 00:36:26,559
but you can't take the
Christmas out of Santa.
527
00:36:32,030 --> 00:36:32,932
And how?
528
00:36:34,733 --> 00:36:36,265
Well, I got him without his
magic switch
529
00:36:36,267 --> 00:36:39,234
and I put him on ice and I left
530
00:36:39,236 --> 00:36:41,474
the North Pole and I never
looked behind.
531
00:36:46,144 --> 00:36:47,713
He's my responsibility.
532
00:36:49,648 --> 00:36:51,015
More like my curse.
533
00:36:52,249 --> 00:36:53,916
I don't know how he got his
switch
534
00:36:53,918 --> 00:36:55,952
or how he got out of that ice,
535
00:36:55,954 --> 00:36:58,791
but one thing's for sure;
Krampus is out of retirement.
536
00:37:10,101 --> 00:37:12,037
911, what's your emergency?
537
00:37:12,970 --> 00:37:14,803
Okay, calm down.
538
00:37:14,805 --> 00:37:15,773
Are they breathing?
539
00:37:17,275 --> 00:37:18,142
Mutilated?
540
00:37:19,878 --> 00:37:20,646
The kids, too?
541
00:37:23,081 --> 00:37:27,283
Bruce, they found more kids,
dead.
542
00:37:27,285 --> 00:37:30,687
I mean really, really, really
dead.
543
00:37:37,095 --> 00:37:37,963
Damn it!
544
00:37:38,762 --> 00:37:40,900
The team's tied up on Lake
Drive.
545
00:37:41,932 --> 00:37:43,869
Dispatch Officer Green and Sean.
546
00:37:57,048 --> 00:37:58,146
Come on, everybody.
547
00:37:58,148 --> 00:37:59,015
Come on, think.
548
00:37:59,017 --> 00:37:59,883
Come on, think, think!
549
00:37:59,885 --> 00:38:01,249
We need to come up with a plan
here.
550
00:38:01,251 --> 00:38:02,117
Yeah, I've got one!
551
00:38:02,119 --> 00:38:02,919
How about we go to the police
and tell
552
00:38:02,921 --> 00:38:04,954
them about your fucking
boyfriend?
553
00:38:04,956 --> 00:38:06,789
No, you can't do that!
554
00:38:06,791 --> 00:38:09,725
What are you gonna do,
tell them I'm Santa Claus?
555
00:38:09,727 --> 00:38:12,731
No, no, plus they'll
kill Krampus on sight.
556
00:38:13,764 --> 00:38:15,898
I can't have that, he cannot be
killed.
557
00:38:15,900 --> 00:38:16,765
What?
558
00:38:16,767 --> 00:38:17,669
I can't have that.
559
00:38:23,907 --> 00:38:25,675
Krampus cannot be killed!
560
00:38:25,677 --> 00:38:26,611
We're connected...
561
00:38:27,613 --> 00:38:30,812
It's just, it would just
be very bad, very bad.
562
00:38:30,814 --> 00:38:32,347
Yeah, well, I think human
lives are a little bit
563
00:38:32,349 --> 00:38:33,582
more important than blowing your
cover.
564
00:38:33,584 --> 00:38:36,722
You'll just have to trust
me, there's more at stake here.
565
00:38:37,956 --> 00:38:40,088
After being trapped all of these
years
566
00:38:40,090 --> 00:38:42,260
I can just imagine how hungry he
is.
567
00:38:44,262 --> 00:38:45,662
Well, what does he eat?
568
00:38:45,664 --> 00:38:47,666
Uh, that's not what I mean.
569
00:38:48,432 --> 00:38:50,034
Krampus kills children.
570
00:38:51,102 --> 00:38:54,303
He puts them in that basket
and then he takes them to hell.
571
00:38:54,305 --> 00:38:56,238
Wait, wait, wait, I saw that
basket.
572
00:38:56,240 --> 00:38:57,374
I saw it when we were in the
freezer.
573
00:38:57,376 --> 00:39:00,376
He was taking these slimy
hairballs from the basket
574
00:39:00,378 --> 00:39:02,711
and putting them into the
Christmas boxes.
575
00:39:02,713 --> 00:39:03,979
No, you're wrong, he takes
them to hell.
576
00:39:03,981 --> 00:39:05,914
No, I know what we saw.
577
00:39:05,916 --> 00:39:08,950
We were spying on him until he
noticed us
578
00:39:08,952 --> 00:39:10,952
and I swear he was taking
those little hairballs,
579
00:39:10,954 --> 00:39:14,023
those disgusting little hairballs
and putting them in boxes.
580
00:39:14,025 --> 00:39:16,959
All those kids the
ranger was talking about.
581
00:39:16,961 --> 00:39:19,128
No, no, no, those hairballs,
582
00:39:19,130 --> 00:39:21,963
as you call them, they go to
hell!
583
00:39:21,965 --> 00:39:22,867
Not here!
584
00:39:24,869 --> 00:39:27,070
Why, why is he taking all these
585
00:39:27,072 --> 00:39:29,907
children now, before Christmas?
586
00:39:31,376 --> 00:39:32,811
They can't all be naughty.
587
00:39:36,213 --> 00:39:37,081
What is he up to?
588
00:39:43,287 --> 00:39:46,257
Speaking of naughty,
I think I have a plan.
589
00:39:55,499 --> 00:39:58,501
Where's my milk and cookies?
590
00:39:58,503 --> 00:40:00,369
Oh, come on, Mom!
591
00:40:00,371 --> 00:40:01,939
That's the best part.
592
00:40:03,441 --> 00:40:06,975
Oh, I know sweetie, but it's
late
593
00:40:06,977 --> 00:40:09,081
and that stuff always
gives you nightmares.
594
00:40:09,981 --> 00:40:10,979
Bed wetter.
595
00:40:10,981 --> 00:40:12,448
Hey, I'm not a bed wetter!
596
00:40:12,450 --> 00:40:14,249
I'm not a bed wetter.
597
00:40:14,251 --> 00:40:16,218
Just that one time.
598
00:40:16,220 --> 00:40:17,986
You're such a baby.
599
00:40:17,988 --> 00:40:22,457
Can you please stop
picking on your brother?
600
00:40:22,459 --> 00:40:23,825
Quit picking on your brother.
601
00:40:23,827 --> 00:40:25,797
I'm so over this place!
602
00:40:26,798 --> 00:40:28,530
Alright then, just go to bed.
603
00:40:28,532 --> 00:40:29,899
Gladly.
604
00:40:29,901 --> 00:40:30,803
Sleep tight.
605
00:40:31,803 --> 00:40:33,939
Don't let the homeless
little hillbillies bite.
606
00:40:34,805 --> 00:40:36,004
Don't worry, mom.
607
00:40:36,006 --> 00:40:38,975
I can protect you from those
homeless little hillbillies.
608
00:40:40,878 --> 00:40:41,746
Goodnight.
609
00:40:43,148 --> 00:40:44,079
Goodnight, sweetie.
610
00:40:44,081 --> 00:40:45,180
I love you.
611
00:40:45,182 --> 00:40:47,186
I love you, too.
612
00:41:47,177 --> 00:41:48,311
Here.
613
00:41:48,313 --> 00:41:49,180
Here.
614
00:41:53,284 --> 00:41:55,852
Once we get him now,
we've gotta trap him till
615
00:41:55,854 --> 00:41:58,019
after midnight and then we're
home free.
616
00:41:58,021 --> 00:41:59,856
Well, until I freeze him up
again.
617
00:41:59,858 --> 00:42:00,557
Why midnight?
618
00:42:00,559 --> 00:42:02,158
Well, it's Christmas.
619
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:04,559
Yeah, and if he takes off
without me
620
00:42:04,561 --> 00:42:07,031
the whole world is going to
hell.
621
00:42:10,401 --> 00:42:12,200
Even more than killing children
622
00:42:12,202 --> 00:42:15,037
he loves women, especially
the naughty ones.
623
00:42:15,039 --> 00:42:17,539
He'll sniff you three out in no
time.
624
00:42:17,541 --> 00:42:19,377
Let's get naughty!
625
00:42:30,188 --> 00:42:31,055
Goddamn it!
626
00:42:36,427 --> 00:42:37,959
Krampus!
627
00:42:37,961 --> 00:42:39,327
Goddamn!
628
00:42:39,329 --> 00:42:40,528
Piss!
629
00:42:40,530 --> 00:42:41,463
Shit!
630
00:42:41,465 --> 00:42:46,838
Motherfuckin' phooey!
631
00:42:47,505 --> 00:42:49,972
Goddamn, piss, shit,
motherfuckin' phooey!
632
00:42:49,974 --> 00:42:52,941
Goddamn, piss, shit,
motherfuckin' phooey!
633
00:42:52,943 --> 00:42:55,044
Goddamn, piss, shit,
motherfuckin' phooey!
634
00:42:55,046 --> 00:42:57,445
Goddamn, piss, shit,
motherfuckin' phooey!
635
00:42:57,447 --> 00:43:00,216
Goddamn, piss, shit,
motherfuckin' phooey!
636
00:43:07,659 --> 00:43:09,591
Get the fuck off me!
637
00:43:25,142 --> 00:43:29,280
I've never been so happy
to see your fucking face!
638
00:43:50,233 --> 00:43:51,535
Jesus, Sean.
639
00:43:54,671 --> 00:43:56,171
What's going on, buddy?
640
00:43:56,173 --> 00:43:57,441
It's bad, Sean.
641
00:43:59,209 --> 00:44:00,742
It got both of them.
642
00:44:00,744 --> 00:44:02,345
Both of Harrison's girls?
643
00:44:02,347 --> 00:44:04,079
Yeah, both.
644
00:44:04,081 --> 00:44:07,350
Never seen anything
like it in all my life.
645
00:44:07,352 --> 00:44:09,688
We're gonna have to call in
the big guns, that's all.
646
00:44:11,021 --> 00:44:12,988
I can't write this report.
647
00:44:12,990 --> 00:44:14,226
Oh, the hell you can't!
648
00:44:18,628 --> 00:44:19,495
I don't get it.
649
00:44:19,497 --> 00:44:22,263
Why do we need the FBI on a bear
attack?
650
00:44:22,265 --> 00:44:25,767
Look, man, the entire yard
is enclosed, it's gated in.
651
00:44:25,769 --> 00:44:28,771
We couldn't find a single
break in the gate anywhere.
652
00:44:28,773 --> 00:44:30,138
Not one.
653
00:44:30,140 --> 00:44:32,043
What are you saying?
654
00:44:33,177 --> 00:44:37,046
Their little hearts were
ripped out.
655
00:44:37,048 --> 00:44:39,718
Sean, this ain't no bear.
656
00:44:49,193 --> 00:44:53,361
This fucking guy is not
gonna ruin my favorite holiday.
657
00:44:53,363 --> 00:44:54,262
How did Santa get here?
658
00:44:54,264 --> 00:44:56,334
I don't know, he was right
behind us.
659
00:45:00,037 --> 00:45:02,238
Santa?
660
00:45:02,240 --> 00:45:04,205
Some lookout he is!
661
00:45:04,207 --> 00:45:06,108
Shit, is he dead?
662
00:45:07,577 --> 00:45:08,646
No, he's breathing.
663
00:45:10,648 --> 00:45:13,082
Old man's not dead, just
useless.
664
00:45:13,084 --> 00:45:14,086
Alright, yeah.
665
00:45:15,052 --> 00:45:15,753
Oh, shit.
666
00:45:17,722 --> 00:45:19,454
Yummy, yummy!
667
00:45:22,392 --> 00:45:24,463
We've gotta tie him up.
668
00:45:27,298 --> 00:45:30,435
Can you get this over
there?
669
00:45:40,410 --> 00:45:42,713
He's seriously down for the
count, guys.
670
00:45:43,648 --> 00:45:44,713
Picture time?
671
00:45:44,715 --> 00:45:45,584
Yeah!
672
00:46:02,566 --> 00:46:04,265
Hello!
673
00:46:04,267 --> 00:46:05,533
- Hi.
- Hello.
674
00:46:05,535 --> 00:46:06,501
One at a time.
675
00:46:06,503 --> 00:46:08,771
Krampus, ho, ho, ho.
676
00:46:08,773 --> 00:46:10,738
Not so tough now, are you?
677
00:46:10,740 --> 00:46:13,744
He looks like some sort of
fucked up reindeer, doesn't he?
678
00:46:15,613 --> 00:46:18,213
Look at this little puppy.
679
00:46:18,215 --> 00:46:19,849
I'm the Krampus, oh.
680
00:46:19,851 --> 00:46:21,182
Count of three.
681
00:46:21,184 --> 00:46:22,486
One, two, three,
Krampus!
682
00:46:27,858 --> 00:46:28,791
It's me.
683
00:46:28,793 --> 00:46:30,327
Listen, listen to me.
684
00:46:32,262 --> 00:46:33,495
This is the Sheriff.
685
00:46:33,497 --> 00:46:37,635
Look, I want you to get out
to Santa Land and I mean now.
686
00:46:38,535 --> 00:46:40,169
You got that?
687
00:46:40,171 --> 00:46:41,073
Go, get on it.
688
00:46:45,876 --> 00:46:48,376
Ha, ha, we got you!
689
00:46:48,378 --> 00:46:49,778
Let's clean you up and then
maybe
690
00:46:49,780 --> 00:46:51,146
we'll get home in time for
Christmas.
691
00:46:51,148 --> 00:46:52,148
Okay, let's go.
692
00:46:52,150 --> 00:46:52,814
Okay.
693
00:46:52,816 --> 00:46:54,649
Dahlia, you on board?
694
00:46:54,651 --> 00:46:56,220
Yeah, he'll be fine.
695
00:47:03,260 --> 00:47:04,128
No!
696
00:47:07,264 --> 00:47:08,132
Krampus!
697
00:47:11,235 --> 00:47:13,171
Krampus, that's enough!
698
00:47:28,251 --> 00:47:29,121
Wow!
699
00:47:30,287 --> 00:47:31,155
Go!
700
00:47:33,890 --> 00:47:34,758
Go!
701
00:47:38,762 --> 00:47:43,601
Hi-ya!
702
00:47:50,340 --> 00:47:52,276
I think I wet myself.
703
00:48:17,901 --> 00:48:19,403
Sadie!
704
00:48:23,807 --> 00:48:25,307
Sadie!
705
00:48:25,309 --> 00:48:27,609
Does Krampus talk?
706
00:48:27,611 --> 00:48:28,479
Never.
707
00:48:29,447 --> 00:48:30,282
Sadie!
708
00:48:32,650 --> 00:48:34,383
Sadie!
709
00:48:34,385 --> 00:48:35,253
- Sadie, oh, my God!
- Brian!
710
00:48:36,354 --> 00:48:37,622
You came for me!
711
00:48:38,889 --> 00:48:40,888
Of course I did,
I was worried about you.
712
00:48:40,890 --> 00:48:41,990
You were?
713
00:48:41,992 --> 00:48:43,258
Of course, I was.
714
00:48:43,260 --> 00:48:44,728
What the hell is going on here?
715
00:48:45,829 --> 00:48:48,896
What weird shit has Dahlia
gotten you into this time?
716
00:48:48,898 --> 00:48:50,467
It's a long story.
717
00:49:05,448 --> 00:49:09,285
In a nutshell, we're trying
to help the real-life Santa.
718
00:49:09,287 --> 00:49:09,921
'Sup?
719
00:49:11,289 --> 00:49:12,657
Fight the evil Krampus.
720
00:49:14,724 --> 00:49:16,927
Great, my girlfriend's on
drugs.
721
00:49:19,563 --> 00:49:20,664
I'm your girlfriend?
722
00:49:39,883 --> 00:49:41,352
What the shit?
723
00:49:46,691 --> 00:49:47,559
Sean!
724
00:49:48,892 --> 00:49:49,760
Sean?
725
00:49:52,662 --> 00:49:54,298
Answer, goddamn it!
726
00:49:57,601 --> 00:49:59,003
Krampus!
727
00:50:12,416 --> 00:50:13,615
No!
728
00:50:13,617 --> 00:50:14,816
No!
729
00:50:14,818 --> 00:50:19,823
Brian, no!
730
00:50:39,809 --> 00:50:41,510
What the fuck is going on?
731
00:50:43,814 --> 00:50:45,012
We've gotta get out of here!
732
00:50:45,014 --> 00:50:45,981
He killed Brian!
733
00:50:45,983 --> 00:50:47,115
Are you okay?
734
00:50:47,117 --> 00:50:48,916
He killed my Brian!
735
00:50:48,918 --> 00:50:49,785
Who?
736
00:50:49,787 --> 00:50:50,651
He killed Brian!
737
00:50:50,653 --> 00:50:51,519
Who?
738
00:50:51,521 --> 00:50:52,787
He killed him!
739
00:50:52,789 --> 00:50:54,555
Krampus!
740
00:50:54,557 --> 00:50:55,423
Oh, shit.
741
00:50:55,425 --> 00:50:56,858
Put the weapon down now!
742
00:50:56,860 --> 00:50:58,160
Hey, you, put that down!
743
00:51:03,700 --> 00:51:05,733
Come on, over there, you know
the drill.
744
00:51:05,735 --> 00:51:07,102
Go on, go on.
745
00:51:07,104 --> 00:51:09,771
Officer Green just
called in and said Sean
746
00:51:09,773 --> 00:51:11,709
is not responding to his radio.
747
00:51:12,675 --> 00:51:13,908
Have you heard from him?
748
00:51:13,910 --> 00:51:15,611
As a matter of fact, I have.
749
00:51:15,613 --> 00:51:20,481
They had a report of a strange
truck at old man Kris's.
750
00:51:20,483 --> 00:51:22,617
He went up there to investigate.
751
00:51:22,619 --> 00:51:25,586
You mean, Santa Land?
752
00:51:25,588 --> 00:51:26,457
Yeah.
753
00:51:28,592 --> 00:51:30,758
Shit, I need a cigarette!
754
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:32,494
What?
755
00:51:32,496 --> 00:51:33,798
Oh, look at you.
756
00:51:35,599 --> 00:51:36,698
What are you doing?
757
00:51:36,700 --> 00:51:37,899
Alright.
758
00:51:38,769 --> 00:51:39,334
Whose gonna answer the
phone?
759
00:51:39,336 --> 00:51:41,035
You are.
760
00:51:41,037 --> 00:51:42,706
Police department, hello?
761
00:51:43,840 --> 00:51:44,708
Hello?
762
00:51:46,075 --> 00:51:48,109
I don't know how to work it!
763
00:51:49,479 --> 00:51:50,615
Get off the cookies!
764
00:52:02,459 --> 00:52:05,494
Okay, what the fuck is going
on?
765
00:52:05,496 --> 00:52:07,528
Who are you people?
766
00:52:07,530 --> 00:52:08,763
Why are you covered in blood?
767
00:52:08,765 --> 00:52:10,599
Why do you have my gun?
768
00:52:10,601 --> 00:52:13,167
Why does my neck hurt, who tased
me?
769
00:52:13,169 --> 00:52:15,838
Kris, I fucking knew you killed
that kid!
770
00:52:15,840 --> 00:52:17,205
I knew you were crazy like that!
771
00:52:17,207 --> 00:52:18,941
I need answers and I need 'em
now!
772
00:52:18,943 --> 00:52:21,713
Shut the fuck up, sit down and
listen!
773
00:52:23,079 --> 00:52:24,646
You have to help us.
774
00:52:24,648 --> 00:52:26,048
We need your help.
775
00:52:26,050 --> 00:52:28,617
He killed Brian, he's gonna kill
everyone.
776
00:52:28,619 --> 00:52:29,718
That's the thing.
777
00:52:29,720 --> 00:52:32,053
It all seems really
crazy, but he didn't do it.
778
00:52:32,055 --> 00:52:33,722
He didn't kill Brian.
779
00:52:33,724 --> 00:52:35,490
The real killer's out there!
780
00:52:35,492 --> 00:52:36,527
He's Santa.
781
00:52:39,063 --> 00:52:41,530
You picked a hell of a day to
do this.
782
00:52:44,635 --> 00:52:46,905
Look, he's Santa Claus!
783
00:52:48,706 --> 00:52:51,106
Why are all the hot ones
crazy?
784
00:52:51,108 --> 00:52:53,941
Look, this is old man Kris.
785
00:52:53,943 --> 00:52:55,676
Everyone knows Kris.
786
00:52:55,678 --> 00:52:57,111
He used to run Santa Land back
in the day,
787
00:52:57,113 --> 00:52:59,046
but now he's just an old hermit.
788
00:52:59,048 --> 00:53:00,015
Excuse me?
789
00:53:00,017 --> 00:53:03,017
And he's going to jail
for a very long time
790
00:53:03,019 --> 00:53:05,120
just like you and you and you.
791
00:53:05,122 --> 00:53:06,457
The hell we are!
792
00:53:13,030 --> 00:53:14,229
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
793
00:53:14,231 --> 00:53:15,564
One at a time, one at a time!
794
00:53:15,566 --> 00:53:16,398
You!
795
00:53:16,400 --> 00:53:17,633
So there's this creature,
right?
796
00:53:17,635 --> 00:53:22,604
He's like this big, hairy animal
with these horns, you know?
797
00:53:22,606 --> 00:53:23,238
Um...
798
00:53:23,240 --> 00:53:24,106
Krampus!
799
00:53:24,108 --> 00:53:25,807
Yeah.
800
00:53:25,809 --> 00:53:28,075
Look, I've seen enough mangled
kids
801
00:53:28,077 --> 00:53:29,947
in the past week to last a
lifetime.
802
00:53:30,914 --> 00:53:33,148
Given the day I've had, I'm not
sure if
803
00:53:33,150 --> 00:53:36,119
I trust my gut or what you're
telling me.
804
00:53:37,086 --> 00:53:39,687
The thing is that he's not the
killer.
805
00:53:39,689 --> 00:53:40,988
He didn't do it, he's Santa.
806
00:53:40,990 --> 00:53:42,925
Yeah, he's Kris.
807
00:53:42,927 --> 00:53:45,961
Kris Kringle, you know, like,
Santa Claus?
808
00:53:45,963 --> 00:53:47,863
Ho, ho, ho!
809
00:53:47,865 --> 00:53:49,231
Santa Claus.
810
00:53:49,233 --> 00:53:51,600
Anyway, the thing is we have
to save
811
00:53:51,602 --> 00:53:53,968
the world from that monster out
there!
812
00:53:53,970 --> 00:53:54,870
The world?
813
00:53:54,872 --> 00:53:55,704
Yes!
814
00:53:55,706 --> 00:53:56,905
Sean, do you trust me?
815
00:53:56,907 --> 00:53:58,140
No!
816
00:53:58,142 --> 00:53:59,073
Santa?
817
00:53:59,075 --> 00:53:59,941
Hmm?
818
00:53:59,943 --> 00:54:01,142
Show him your thing.
819
00:54:06,650 --> 00:54:07,519
Holy shit.
820
00:54:10,220 --> 00:54:11,186
Wow.
821
00:54:12,289 --> 00:54:15,293
Gimme the fucking gun, give it
here.
822
00:54:17,327 --> 00:54:18,794
What's it called?
823
00:54:18,796 --> 00:54:20,198
Krampus!
824
00:54:40,050 --> 00:54:41,986
This is unbelievable.
825
00:54:44,320 --> 00:54:45,822
Let's say I do believe you.
826
00:54:47,791 --> 00:54:50,825
When I was a kid and you opened
this place
827
00:54:50,827 --> 00:54:52,894
I really thought you were Santa.
828
00:54:52,896 --> 00:54:55,863
It was the only thing this
boring town had going for it.
829
00:54:55,865 --> 00:54:56,833
Christmas all year round.
830
00:54:58,135 --> 00:55:00,202
I thought I was the
luckiest kid in the world.
831
00:55:00,204 --> 00:55:01,906
Well, goody fucking gum drops.
832
00:55:02,872 --> 00:55:03,671
I'm glad you had your fun.
833
00:55:03,673 --> 00:55:05,640
- Here, have a cookie.
- Thank you.
834
00:55:05,642 --> 00:55:06,608
But we don't have much time.
835
00:55:06,610 --> 00:55:08,679
You see, we gotta trap
him before midnight!
836
00:55:09,979 --> 00:55:12,013
Yeah, no one knows this forest
837
00:55:12,015 --> 00:55:14,182
like I do, not even you, Kris.
838
00:55:14,184 --> 00:55:17,218
Let's get this Krampus
and take back Christmas!
839
00:55:20,124 --> 00:55:22,957
Okay, Dahlia, you're gonna be
our eyes
840
00:55:22,959 --> 00:55:25,394
on the south end in car two
of the bumblebee coaster.
841
00:55:25,396 --> 00:55:26,264
Got it!
842
00:55:28,264 --> 00:55:29,997
Sadie, you have your compact?
843
00:55:29,999 --> 00:55:31,899
Great, you're gonna flash
it if you see anything.
844
00:55:31,901 --> 00:55:33,771
You're gonna be in the bumblebee
hive.
845
00:55:35,805 --> 00:55:39,010
I'm gonna be perched right
here on top of the north tower.
846
00:55:42,311 --> 00:55:45,881
Sean, you'll be with me in the
tower.
847
00:55:45,883 --> 00:55:47,314
Your wish is my command.
848
00:55:48,184 --> 00:55:49,117
- Santa?
- Hmm?
849
00:55:49,119 --> 00:55:50,119
You're gonna be at the house
of mirrors
850
00:55:50,121 --> 00:55:51,787
and you are gonna have
your cane at the ready.
851
00:55:51,789 --> 00:55:53,055
I'm there.
852
00:55:56,093 --> 00:55:57,758
- Yeah!
- Ha!
853
00:56:01,965 --> 00:56:04,968
Santa Claus is coming to town,
bitches!
854
00:56:07,905 --> 00:56:09,137
Okay.
855
00:56:11,941 --> 00:56:13,441
Oh, no, it was blurry.
856
00:56:51,447 --> 00:56:52,446
Shit!
857
00:56:52,448 --> 00:56:55,283
I don't think it's working.
858
00:56:55,285 --> 00:56:56,484
What do we do now?
859
00:56:56,486 --> 00:56:57,954
Good question.
860
00:57:13,871 --> 00:57:14,570
It's okay.
861
00:57:14,572 --> 00:57:15,970
- Okay.
- It's just a noise.
862
00:57:29,119 --> 00:57:30,785
- Okay.
- Come on!
863
00:57:30,787 --> 00:57:32,854
Fuck you!
864
00:57:32,856 --> 00:57:33,725
Fuck you!
865
00:57:37,794 --> 00:57:38,463
Fuck you!
866
00:57:48,872 --> 00:57:53,073
Hi-ya!
867
00:57:53,075 --> 00:57:54,910
This way, Sadie!
868
00:57:58,581 --> 00:57:59,916
Nice!
869
00:58:01,418 --> 00:58:02,486
Motherfucker!
870
00:58:04,253 --> 00:58:05,122
Come on!
871
00:58:10,126 --> 00:58:11,827
Fucking asshole!
872
00:58:32,416 --> 00:58:34,082
Stop!
873
00:58:34,084 --> 00:58:35,182
Cherry?
874
00:58:35,184 --> 00:58:36,417
What the hell is she doing
here?
875
00:58:36,419 --> 00:58:38,055
Get those girls to safety.
876
00:58:39,456 --> 00:58:41,492
I'll take care of these guys.
877
00:58:43,894 --> 00:58:45,994
Who the fuck called
the fucking bartender?
878
00:58:45,996 --> 00:58:47,495
I got this.
879
00:58:47,497 --> 00:58:50,034
I am the wifey, after all.
880
00:58:52,635 --> 00:58:55,336
Ain't that right, honey?
881
00:58:55,338 --> 00:58:58,441
Baby, I missed you so much.
882
00:59:02,079 --> 00:59:04,345
How is she gonna capture
Krampus?
883
00:59:04,347 --> 00:59:06,349
Well, she's his crazy ex,
right?
884
00:59:07,416 --> 00:59:09,019
That must make her Mrs. Claus!
885
00:59:10,119 --> 00:59:11,021
Come on!
886
00:59:12,488 --> 00:59:16,457
Of all nights, you chose
tonight
887
00:59:16,459 --> 00:59:19,260
to call in some bitches for fun?
888
00:59:19,262 --> 00:59:20,262
No, no, no, no...
889
00:59:20,264 --> 00:59:22,129
- Big surprise!
- It's not what it looks like.
890
00:59:22,131 --> 00:59:24,131
You whimpering fool!
891
00:59:24,133 --> 00:59:25,503
You failed me again!
892
00:59:27,271 --> 00:59:31,439
I always stuck by you even
when your business failed
893
00:59:31,441 --> 00:59:32,941
and we had to eat the reindeer.
894
00:59:32,943 --> 00:59:35,142
Did I ever complain?
895
00:59:35,144 --> 00:59:36,012
Never.
896
00:59:38,514 --> 00:59:43,017
Don't you know what I've been
up to?
897
00:59:58,702 --> 01:00:00,602
Margaret, he's just drunk.
898
01:00:00,604 --> 01:00:02,269
He's gonna be fine tomorrow,
don't...
899
01:00:02,271 --> 01:00:06,640
Look, Margaret, I gotta,
hang on a second I got...
900
01:00:06,642 --> 01:00:08,276
Goddamn it!
901
01:00:08,278 --> 01:00:09,513
No, not you, Margaret.
902
01:00:11,014 --> 01:00:11,883
Hold on.
903
01:00:14,017 --> 01:00:16,450
Green, this is the sheriff.
904
01:00:16,452 --> 01:00:19,354
Look, we haven't heard
from Sean in a while.
905
01:00:19,356 --> 01:00:20,555
He went out to Santa Land.
906
01:00:20,557 --> 01:00:22,524
I need you guys to get out
there, I'm a little bit worried.
907
01:00:22,526 --> 01:00:24,191
Find out what the heck is going
on.
908
01:00:24,193 --> 01:00:24,825
Jesus Christ, Sean!
909
01:00:24,827 --> 01:00:26,528
Get out there right now.
910
01:00:26,530 --> 01:00:27,394
Okay.
911
01:00:27,396 --> 01:00:28,662
Good, thank you.
912
01:00:30,434 --> 01:00:31,302
Jesus.
913
01:00:32,535 --> 01:00:35,370
Margaret, hello?
914
01:00:36,273 --> 01:00:37,140
Come on!
915
01:00:41,177 --> 01:00:43,546
What is this place?
916
01:01:07,738 --> 01:01:08,606
Krampus!
917
01:01:20,416 --> 01:01:21,517
Cherry, what have you done?
918
01:01:23,153 --> 01:01:28,159
I was nobody to you and
nobody to the entire world.
919
01:01:28,657 --> 01:01:30,758
You saw the way they portrayed
me.
920
01:01:30,760 --> 01:01:35,763
Always at your side with a
plate of cookies to serve you.
921
01:01:35,765 --> 01:01:36,633
Uh-uh-uh.
922
01:01:38,135 --> 01:01:43,140
I was portrayed as fat, ugly and
old.
923
01:01:44,206 --> 01:01:49,145
When we both know that I am
fucking hot!
924
01:01:52,349 --> 01:01:55,082
I am cleansing the world of all
925
01:01:55,084 --> 01:01:58,318
the little shits, naughty or
nice!
926
01:01:58,320 --> 01:01:59,187
And guess what?
927
01:01:59,189 --> 01:01:59,887
You can't do this!
928
01:01:59,889 --> 01:02:03,291
They'll all think it was you!
929
01:02:10,834 --> 01:02:12,466
What's that noise?
930
01:02:12,468 --> 01:02:14,468
It's, uh, rats.
931
01:02:14,470 --> 01:02:15,169
It's probably just rats.
932
01:02:15,171 --> 01:02:17,305
Big fucking rats or something.
933
01:02:17,307 --> 01:02:18,372
Oh, my God, gross.
934
01:02:18,374 --> 01:02:22,479
After everything we went
through rats are gross?
935
01:02:32,689 --> 01:02:34,457
Hairy balls!
936
01:02:42,666 --> 01:02:44,399
Why are you doing this?
937
01:02:44,401 --> 01:02:48,602
To rewrite history my
way with a little help
938
01:02:48,604 --> 01:02:52,575
from my hairy
boyfriend.
939
01:03:02,119 --> 01:03:02,820
Oh, baby!
940
01:03:03,854 --> 01:03:08,759
You were too busy spreading
love to the world.
941
01:03:13,463 --> 01:03:16,801
Krampus, go get our sleigh.
942
01:03:18,200 --> 01:03:21,401
We have work to do tonight.
943
01:03:41,224 --> 01:03:43,494
Killer hairy balls!
944
01:04:28,738 --> 01:04:31,308
Sounds like it's feeding time.
945
01:04:34,843 --> 01:04:39,914
Krampus!
946
01:05:29,365 --> 01:05:30,633
We have to stop them.
947
01:05:40,343 --> 01:05:40,978
Hurry!
948
01:05:42,412 --> 01:05:43,680
She has my cane.
949
01:05:45,548 --> 01:05:46,417
Mazel tov!
950
01:06:02,965 --> 01:06:06,300
Get her off my sleigh,
she's not magical!
951
01:06:06,302 --> 01:06:06,936
Go, go, go!
952
01:06:15,878 --> 01:06:16,846
Go, go, go!
953
01:06:17,780 --> 01:06:18,715
Go, go, go!
954
01:06:28,758 --> 01:06:29,627
Yes!
955
01:06:53,782 --> 01:06:54,651
I'm so sorry.
956
01:06:56,720 --> 01:06:57,921
But you're all connected.
957
01:07:32,555 --> 01:07:34,858
Sean, this way, come on!
958
01:07:35,791 --> 01:07:36,659
Sean!
959
01:07:38,128 --> 01:07:39,093
Sean!
960
01:07:39,095 --> 01:07:40,698
Sean, are you alright?
961
01:07:43,400 --> 01:07:44,535
What happened?
962
01:07:47,403 --> 01:07:49,637
You wouldn't believe me if I
told you.
963
01:09:27,070 --> 01:09:29,005
Merry Christmas, bitches!
964
01:09:36,481 --> 01:09:41,481
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