Original subtitles

[drumroll]

[cheerful electronic music]

♪ ♪

[laughs]

[whimpering]

Uh! Wah!

♪ ♪

[exclaims] [frog ribbits]

[frog croaks]

[laughing]

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

♪ ♪

[car horn honks]

[toy meows]

Ta-da!

- Ah! - Ugh.

[chuckles] [whistles]

Whoa! Ah!

- [chuckles] - Aww.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

Thanks for watching the kiddos today, tía.

Normally I wouldn't ask, but I have this lunch thing.

This "small-business owner of the year" lunch thing,

where you'll be awarded a plaque by the mayor herself

and you get to give a speech.

- [groans] - [laughs]

Yeah, public speaking isn't really my jam.

Getting kind of sweaty

just thinking about it. [sniffs]

You know, when she was only four years old,

she stood up in the middle of church,

and, loud as can be,

she announces she wasn't wearing any--

And that's why I don't speak in public.

Bye, pups. Have fun.

♪ ♪

[laughs] Ay, mi Elizabeth,

she forgets to eat when she's nervous.

Time to prepare the after-lunch lunch.

Nice place you got here, Phil and Lil.

Want to show us around?

Sure. We'll give you the extra-special tour.

For friends and family.

Lil, if you please...

Over here, we find the reading couch.

We sit here with our mommy until she falls asleep.

all: Ooh.

And then we put her stuff in here

so she can play treasure hunt.

all: Ah.

[gasps] Is that original artwork?

Yep, it changes every day

and it magically dis-repears every night.

all: Ooh. Ah.

Keep moving. Lots more to see.

Presenting... - Lil and Phil's room.

- You got two of everything. - Is that your crib, Phil?

Nope. That one. Can't you tell?

- So that one's Lil's. - Nope. We share.

The other's for our stuffed "aminals."

- Who's this one, then? - Oh, that's Lamby.

He's special. We "gotted" him when we was born.

So we share he. It works out perfect.

♪ ♪

[both laugh]

[groans]

Oops. That's okay. We have more.

- [gasps] - [laughs]

You do share everything.

I has to draw the line at tostones.

[groans] Have mine.

It hurts to bite.

Ay, ¿qué te pasa, mi'ja?

Tostones are your favorite.

Let tía see what's wrong.

[gasps] A new tooth.

Big grown-up girl. - Huh?

Let's get you a cold teether to chew on, okay, corazón?

No new teeth here.

Still my little Phillipitito.

♪ ♪

Do you see anything?

Ooh, there's a huge tooth.

Oh, wait. That's a Reptar puff.

Yeah, you got nothing.

Uh, sorry, Phil. We all looked.

[groans] Why would Lil get a tooth and not me?

We do everything at the same time.

Just ask Wall Giraffe.

Maybe Lil was born first.

[gasps] That's it.

I'm "olderer."

Oh, that explains everything,

like how I know more stuffs.

What are you talking about, Lillian?

Oh, little Phillip,

when you're my age, you'll understand.

We're the same. We've always been together.

Then how come I a-member a long time ago

when you weren't "borneded" yet?

The just Lil days. - [groans]

Oh, the world was my rooster then.

Uh, Lil, there's something

you might want to see in this book.

Pictures? Of me?

But I already seen myself before.

Maybe you should look again.

What if I show you the story of what your life would've been

if there never was a Phil?

Ah, any story without me sounds boring,

unless it's got a pirate cave.

[gasps] Ooh, that minds me.

There's a whole nother room I didn't show you yet.

Come on. [laughter]

♪ ♪

This is what you wanted to show me?

Hot chocolate and mush-mellow-lows.

Remember how you and Phil always share the mush-mellows?

Yep. One for me. One for--

Wait. Where's Phillip?

There is no Phil, just Lil.

What do you think of that?

One more for me.

I could get used to this "no Phil" life.

[gasps] My favorite.

Apple-y ladybugs.

Wait. What's these icky brown things doing here?

Raisins. Those are the dots on the ladybug.

Well, I don't like raisins.

That why Phil always eats them for me,

even though he doesn't like them either.

[gasps] Oh.

That's right.

It was pretty nice having Phil around, huh?

Eh, how bad can they be?

[camera shutter clicks]

Let's turn the page.

- Welcome to our secret cave. - Oh.

It looks like you come here a lot.

Yep. Best room in the house.

If you look this way, you'll see the kitchen.

[singing in Spanish]

- Was something here before? - Yeah.

Something exactly my size but with a bow.

- Well, we can always, um... - Put down some cozy pillows?

Oh, or more toys.

Ooh, I get the seesaw all to myself.

This "no Phil" life

keeps getting "betterer" and "betterer."

[groans]

[pants]

Hi, Tommy. Hi, Chuckie.

We didn't know you were at the park.

Sorry, Lil.

Why are Chuckie and Tommy acting like that?

You'll see soon enough.

- [gasps] - Please, it's all yours.

We know the rules. - What are you talking about?

Hey! No babies on the slide!

[both shout]

[laughs] Not you, silly Lilly.

Go ahead.

[laughs]

Things are kind of different, huh?

Uh-huh.

I get to go on the slide first,

and Angelica's nice to me?

[gasps] Whoa. This is even "betterer" than I dreamed.

Ooh, and without Phillip,

I get all the sand toys and the bucket.

Tommy, Chuckie, wait for me!

Sandbox with babies-- you're so funny.

What are we playing next, Lilly?

Um, Susie, she's still talking to me.

Why?

Well, without Phil,

you and Angelica are "bestest" friends.

What? Not "postible," even in pretend life.

- Huh, huh? - [gasps] Quackie.

"Bestest" friends dress alike.

Say "ice cream with sprinkles on top."

Ice cream with sprinkles on top.

What Angelica said.

[camera shutter clicks]

All right, move it out.

Careful. Careful. Little more that way.

- Oh! - Watch the hoofs.

Yeah, Stripey will fill that empty space.

Now, what else? Aha.

Nope, not this one. Definitely not.

Why do grown-ups always take pictures of kids

with pa'sghetti on our heads.

I want to see Phil. Show me Phil.

All right. Get ready.

Oh, there's Phil.

Oh, now everything's the same as before.

I know. He looks like Phil.

But nothing is the same.

Oh, Susie, I think I know my own brother.

Phil, am I glad to see you. - Huh?

Do I know you?

[chuckles] That's not funny, Phillip.

My name isn't Phillip. It's Willip.

Who are you? - I'm your twin, remember?

We love all the same things--

mud, frogs, diapie waffles.

Here, try this. - Ew, gross.

I'm not into diapie waffles or sharing.

What about Lamby, huh?

Or "favoritest" stuffed "aminal"

we "gotted" when we was born.

I never heard of anyone named Lamby.

This is Oscar, and he's all mine.

I'm pretty sure my mommy

would've told me if I had a twin.

Your mommy is my mommy.

Where is she? She'll know me.

Go ahead. She's over there.

Let's go, Phil.

Uh, it's Will.

Well, hello, there, sweetie.

Wow. You two could almost be twins.

[chuckles] We got to go, buddy.

It's ice cream time, and you're driving.

- Nice meeting you. - Huh?

See you, uh, probably never.

You're leaving?

Well, can't you stay and play with me?

Ah, we got nothing in common.

Ready, Will?

Phil and Mommy are getting ice cream

and having fun without me.

♪ ♪

[gasps] Where am I?

Where's Phil? Is he there, too?

That's up to you.

I want Phil in all the pictures.

[cries] Please, Susie, take me back.

Take me back.

[crying]

Phil, it's me, Lil.

I'm not "bestest" friends with Angelica,

and I don't want two mush-mellow-lows,

and I don't like Oscar.

I like Lamby 'cause he's ours.

Here. - Uh, okay.

Thanks.

Who's this Oscar?

They're doing fine.

Hey, pups.

Ooh, and Lillian has a new tooth.

Is that...?

Elizabeth, Phillip has new hair.

He's growing up so fast. - [laughs]

New hairs, huh? You know what that means.

Say "hello" to your older brother.

Well, back to the book.

Sit it down, Phil.

[eerie electronic music]

♪ ♪

All right, sprouts.

Tonight's dining experience is out of this world.

Inspired by night 15 of the cross-country motorcycle trip

I took my first year out of college,

welcome to Moonlight Burrito Night.

Randy, fair warning--

this burrito just might change your life.

Hey, same goes for my Galactiscope 9000.

It's so powerful,

you might even see the other side of the moon.

Then this'll be a night for the ages.

Grandpa, what's so special about that side of the moon?

Isn't it just like this one?

We don't know, daffodil. That's the mystery.

No one's ever seen it.

Well, according to "Telescope Man," issue 625,

that side hides all the answers of the universe.

All the answers of the universe.

Ooh.

Thanks, Mr. Susie's Daddy.

That's the same issue where he does battle

with zombie Galileo, so you got to take it

with a grain of salt. [chuckles]

Looks like Spike's doing battle with your lawn right now.

Ah, he's fine.

We all get a free pass to act a little funky under a full moon.

Now, watch and learn the magic

of the Moonlight Burrito.

Hey, Angelica, why are you doing that?

Duh, hamster head!

I'm gonna hit the moon and spin it to see the other side!

[toy squeaks] - [Spike pants]

You're gonna need a bigger squeaky toy.

Well, I'm not giving up,

'cause knowing the answers of the universe

is gonna make me the most powerful person in the world.

all: Huh? - [groans]

It's like you were born last weekend.

If you know it all, you rule it all.

But couldn't you just fly to the moon

and see it for yourself?

Or you babies could fly me there.

I'll even let you have, say, one moon answer apiece.

[gasps] Seeing the moon up close

is good enough for me.

I'm gonna ask how much the ocean is made out of fish spit.

I'm gonna ask why bananas aren't sparkly.

What a missed oppor-toot-ity.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Go pull the spaceship around while I get my bags checkered.

Uh, are we sure we want to help Angelica

find all the answers of the universe?

Whoa! [grunts]

She's already pretty "powderful."

Normally, no,

but I've always wanted to learn how to speak duck,

and I'm pretty sure this is my only chance.

I call dibs on the best seat. [grunts]

[grunts]

♪ ♪

[engines roar]

[device beeping]

How do you find the Cynthia show on this thing?

- [gasps] - Whoa.

That star dog looks just like Spikey.

- [gasps] - Phillip!

Your elbow is on my side of the chair!

Nuh-uh, just looks like 'cause I gots bigger elbows.

- Bigger elbows over there. - Hey!

You-- [alarm blares]

Phil, Lil, watch where you're flying.

We're gonna get smooshed into bits!

It's Phillip's elbow's fault.

Sure, blame it on the big elbows, every time.

all: Whoa!

[indistinct shouting] - Look out!

Incoming! [Spike barks]

[Spike panting]

[all sigh] - This isn't playtime.

We've got a mission to complete.

Step on it, Phil and Lil.

Guys, let's really think about this.

Is it so bad that the moon is hiding all the answers?

Of course it's bad. I'm Angelica Pickles.

Nobody hides answers from me.

I'm a-posed to know everything.

But you don't know everything about me.

I got lots of stuff I never told any of you guys.

You've been keeping secrets from us, Finster?

Spill them. - What? No.

They're not secrets.

They're just stuffs I never said

'cause--I don't know-- I never thought about it.

Well, I'll just make the moon tell me everything

you ever thought in your whole little life.

You're not being nice, Angelica.

Yeah.

Chuckie doesn't have to tell us whatever he doesn't want to.

Fine. Fine. I'll be in the lounge.

They better have mango juice on this spaceship.

And, Phil and Lil,

for the sake of all things moldy,

keep us on course.

Oh, man, that smells good.

Thanks, Lou. - Ah, ah, ah.

The sacred art of perfecting the Moonlight Burrito

calls for a sprinkle of paprika

and then some pretty patterns-- happy little swirls.

Huh, a burrito comb.

That is a burrito-only comb, correct?

[wiper squeaking]

My rocket thrusters are at full boost.

- [gasps] - Hey, Finster!

I've been thinking, and I'll give you one more chance.

Is there anything you want to tell me before the moon does,

like secrets you've been keeping about me?

Quit asking, Angelica.

Can't we just get our answers from the moon and go home?

[scoffs] Oh, Susie,

you didn't really think I'd let any of you babies

get the answers, did you?

I'm sorry. What, now?

Should've saw this coming.

If I'm gonna be the most powerful person in the world,

I got to keep all the answers to myself,

but I'll give you answers for a cookie.

All of the babies of the playground

will have to come to me with their questions.

You know, we don't have to fly this ship to the moon.

You "readed" my mind.

[device beeping]

And they'll all have to pay me with a cookie.

One cookie for every answer. [alarm blares]

[both gasp]

♪ ♪

[all screaming]

Mm. Hey, Lou, that burrito looks delicious and done.

[acoustic guitar strums]

It's so close, I can almost taste it.

♪ Black bean sizzlin' in the pale moonlight ♪

♪ Makin' harmony with the rice and cheese ♪

Don't tease me, Lou.

♪ It's gonna be a special night ♪

♪ It's gonna be a special night ♪

♪ I said, black bean sizzlin' in the... ♪

[Spike groans contentedly]

♪ ♪

- [grunts] - Whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! - Ooh!

That's it!

I should've expected less of you babies.

Angelica, where are you going?

Ha! I'd tell you, but you know the deal.

No cookie, no answer.

[laughs]

♪ ♪

[babies scream]

[beeps]

Whoa. Everyone okay?

Better than awful, I guess.

We got to stop Angelica.

Come on, Bottlestar, power up.

Wait a second.

Angelica said the more you know,

the more power you have.

So, if I tell you the stuffs I never told you,

maybe it'll give us more power?

I knew he'd be the first to crack.

Um, I like tuna fish

better than peanut butter and jelly combined.

[all gasp] - Whoa.

I never "knowed" that. My turn.

I buried a little dump truck

so I could grow a dump-truck tree.

I can run faster than my puppy Foster

when I pretend I'm made of lightning.

I "inventeded" the color called "greeple."

When I grow up, I'm gonna be a woodchuck.

And I'm really good at opening stuff--

snappy stuff, twisty stuff.

Can you open this tubey cheese?

I been trying forever.

- I got it! - Nice!

Tubey cheese for everyone!

No, I mean, I know how to get us out of this space hole.

♪ ♪

Aw, that was perfectly good tubey cheese.

Let it go, Phillip. Let it go.

♪ ♪

Hey, dog star.

[sniffing]

[barks] - Whoa.

- It worked. - Spikey.

- Spike to the rescue. - My tubey cheese.

[engine roars]

We're too far away.

Susie, pretend you're made of lightning.

You got it.

- [laughs] - Hey.

Fast, fast, fast.

Don't even think about it, babies.

♪ ♪

- [gasps] - Whoa!

[Tommy screams, all grunt]

You babies should've thought twice

before you tried to stop me,

and a cookie's not gonna cut it.

If you ever want an answer, I want a whole birthday cake

with extra frosting and two kinds of ice cream.

You can make us give you all the treats in the world,

but we'll always know the truth about you.

The truth will be what I say it is, Susie Carmichael.

Now, telescope, show me the other side.

Show me the answers that'll give me

all the power of the universe.

[screams]

I've seen too much.

No wonder the moon only shows its one side.

The universe can keep its dumb answers.

I'll get my powers some other way.

[chuckles]

Ah, a few more minutes for reflection.

What?

Kidding. Bon appétit.

[scarfs] Mmm.

Oh, I can taste the song you sang

and the paprika you combed over.

Ooh, I feel the moonlight. Oh, the mystery.

Lou, how did you do that?

[moaning]

Happy Moonlight Burrito Night,

my friend.

I wonder what answers Angelica "learneded"

that made her run away like that.

Maybe someday when we're older, we'll know, or not.

I think there's lots of stuff in the universe

that we'll just never understand.

- I'm looking at it right now. - Huh?

Spike saved us some tubey cheese.

You know you want some.

♪ ♪

Klasky Csupo.

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