Original subtitles

Hi.

Dardo, this is Jay.

Hi.

See you.

Can we talk? I have to talk to you.

Do you mind?

No.

It's over between us, Jay.

That's that.

Now I'm with Dardo.

I'm leaving home.

- They threw you out? - No, I can't stand it.

No one can stand it, me neither,

but we go on.

It's not easy to put up with your parents,

but where will you go?

- You don't have a job. - I'll get one.

I'll stay with Leo for now.

Think about it, Jay. Wait a little.

Come with me.

When I get a job,

I want you to live with me.

What are you saying?

I want to be with you.

I know you want to be with me.

I'm 16, you idiot!

My parents can put you

in jail.

Think before you talk!

- We'd have to be married. - I know that.

You don't mind getting married?

You're not well.

You're really crazy.

You make me feel bad, it's not fair.

I love you, too,

very much.

But I won't ruin my life.

Who sold you blue cocaine?

Coke's for old people.

It's "Dog", Jay, "DOG"-

It's wild. it makes you think at 100 miles an hour.

- "Grass" is better. - "Puppy Peace".

That's what it's called.

It's a dog tranquilizer.

You grind it...

and snort it like coke.

"Dog": it's great.

That's really fucking strong!

I'm almost drunk.

You'll be completely drunk

but you'll feel great.

Come.

You didn't use any of the original story. Not even the title.

- Where's it from? - It's a Mexican saying.

- "The Deaf One" says it. - He's a good character.

- I also like "The Pimp". -That's Dante.

- I wrote that part for him. - Maybe...

"Real Men Don't Fear Death".

It's long, but sounds good.

Good job, Martin. Final draft.

- No need to change a word. -The director will.

Jordi's not on the project.

He's doing a series for Italian TV.

Whoever does it, it's not a masterpiece, but it's decent.

Try to film it well.

It won't be just decent, it'll be great!

I have the perfect director for this movie.

Mario is filming and when he's done, he's got another one.

- There's no one else. - Echanique.

- Martin Echanique. - He's busy, too.

He's adapting 3 novels for Spanish TV.

It's no joke. No one can do it better than you.

My partners agree, they're very excited about it.

We want you to make this film.

Thanks, but I can't.

It's been eight years.

I've lost my touch.

That's ridiculous.

You can't lose talent. Don't answer me now,

think about it for a few days.

You'll get a good salary.

1O percent of the budget plus profits.

Total freedom, to do what you want, choose your people,

within the budget, this isn't Hollywood.

It's your movie, Martin.

You know what, José?

Don't say anything. I won't listen right now.

You want two weeks? Fine. I'm in no hurry, I know the answer.

Time won't help at all.

A grudge grows with time.

People don't forgive you for telling the truth.

It's worse than an insult. But I didn't insult José.

- You don't say... - I didn't!

I simply took off his mask.

He said he was a pig, not me.

He saw what he is: repugnant.

- You can never keep your mouth shut. -That's not true.

I lie and let people lie to me when they mean no harm.

But people like José are so repugnant

- I taste blood. - You always do.

I never say what I don't want to say: I choose

words that hurt, that cause mortal wounds.

There must be lots of stinking people,

because if you say Dante "double-v" Gomez, everyone

looks disgusted.

"There must be" is a sign of optimism or naiveté.

The world is full of stinking people.

- A large majority. - An absolute majority!

And here we say "double-u", my beloved "fucking foreigner".

She speaks better Spanish than you.

He's half-deaf and doesn't listen.

He's blocked by the tango nostalgia of B. Aires natives in exile.

No nostalgia, no tangos, no exiles. Hard of hearing.

Hey, Alicia, sit down.

- I'm not sitting? - Five yards off the ground.

- You're as high as a kite. -Yeah!

It's fantastic!

I've met a Bolivian dealer

not a street dealer.

He's a direct importer.

He only sells to European aristocrats.

I'm an exception because Bolivians are crazy about blonds.

If I'm broke someday, I'll pay him with my body.

I think it's pure, Dante. I'm flying.

It's the best coke I've ever tried.

I'll go fix you a nice little spoonfull.

Slow down, Alicia.

You're rig ht. I'm a bit greedy.

I'll wait two minutes.

I missed what Navarro said.

- He bought it: Dante is ok. - Great!

"The Pimp" is wonderful. He wrote it for you.

José accepted me 'cause he wants him badly.

I won't do it.

Then I won't, either.

Besides, I won't work with just any director.

You have to do it, you have no excuse not to.

If you do a lousy job, I'll fix it up when I edit it.

You'll do it great. I'm sure about that.

- He's scared shitless. - No, I'm not.

That's normal.

If the story's good, despite the author, it'll be a good movie.

It is. It's got humor, suspense... But I'm not interested.

- It'd just be for the money. - Give me 1,000 pesetas.

All stories have been told, by better

guys than me.

That's okay.

Here comes John Ford, the forties,

Rko, that you would've liked to work for them

but you were born too late...

Thank you.

It's silly, but I love to be given flowers.

I'll be right back.

A pee, a line, and let's enjoy life! We'll go to your place.

You have to try it, Alone, no people around,

no limit! I have enough for a month. You can take

all you want but in half an hour, scram

I want to be alone with him.

I'm so hot I feel ashamed.

No, I'm not. I love to screw.

That's enough, Alicia!

I said "screw", not "fuck"...

- I love screwing... - Alicia!

Can we do it on Monday?

- What, screw?. - No, not that.

Give me some

for after the theater. I have to work.

I can't, either. I have to dine with some TV people.

Wait, wait.

Try again.

Change your tone of voice or try another excuse.

That was too phoney.

I want to be alone. Sounds better?

It makes me feel like shit, but it sounds better.

Do you understand, Dante?

Blood clot, Alzheimer's, old age.

No, not him, me.

Why do I always fall for complicated men?

Why aren't I more sensible?

Why don't I look for someone my age, a simple guy

who's madly in love with me?

- Do it. Don't hesitate. - I can't.

He's an asshole.

He deserves to be left alone.

But then he calls me "Alisia".

"Alisia" with a soft "s" not "Alicia" like a Spaniard.

And I give in.

Or "Blondie". That's even worse.

He does me in,

my knees go and I can't think.

- You understand it? - I think so.

Tango nostalgia. Get another Argentinian.

I'll be right back.

You're tough Martin. A stinking shit.

I hate her like that.

Tell her. It's better than "I want to be alone".

I do want to be alone.

You could be nicer.

You could've stopped her. You knew what she was going to say.

You should at least think about how she feels.

- It's none of my business. - I do think about it.

But I can't handle her.

She's complicated,

tOO.

So much that if you'd bought her a rose, she'd be

in bliss.

Some people can be happy with very little.

But being nice is not for males.

And you're just... corny. Only someone

corny and sentimental would say that.

- A rose'd be my doom. - You were going to say "gay".

Say it, you won't offend me.

Corny and gay,

that's right.

I can't give her a rose.

A rose would bind me, she'd say "Why don't we get married?"

impossible.

I'm not a stinking shit, just cautious.

I try not to encourage false fantasies.

That is, a stinking shit.

Martin!

Martin, wake up!

You can't hear shit with these!

That's the idea...

Your wife's been calling you from Buenos Aires for 7 hours...

Seven hours? I didn't hear anything...

It's Jay. He's fucked up.

Howl

- What's wrong? What happened? - An overdose.

- He's dead? - No, he's not dead.

He's in a coma,

but Liliana says he's going to come out of it. There's no danger,

he's past the worst.

You're lying!

He's not dead, calm down. I'm not lying to you.

He was very bad, but he's better. I'm not lying.

I made you a reservation on a direct flight.

Did you talk to Liliana? it can't have been an overdose.

- Jay doesn't do hard drugs. - I don't know what he took.

- It was an attempted suicide. -19 years old and he does that?

I find it hard to believe too, but what do I know?.

It's not strange at his age.

- Statistically, teenage suicides... - Fuck you and your statistics.

- He had no motive! - There are tons of motives.

But he has to want to live.

Talk to him and find out what's up.

You have no fucking idea what he thinks!

You've seen him

four times in five years. That isn't shit!

He's your son, but you don't know him!

He'll be home in a couple of days.

- Why would he kill himself? - Fashion.

A rock star dies and his fans imitate him.

All the kids are jaded, not just Jay.

They don't want to listen.

He mixed whisky with "Dog".

It's a tranquilizer for dogs.

The mixture almost killed Jay.

Dad, do me a favor. Don't be offended.

Take a bath. You reek of alcohol.

Mom'll say you're a drunk.

My smell doesn't matter. She always says that.

But if you're like that, I can't contradict her.

- How are the kids? - Fine.

- Big? - Yes, big.

Where are they?

His heart stopped.

Luckily, they revived him and he's fine.

Migue took care of everything. if he hadn't,

Jay wouldn't be with us.

I thought doctors couldn't treat relatives.

He kept him alive.

And he's just his stepfather.

But he does act like a father.

Hello.

How are you?

Martin, this is Migue.

- Hello. - How do you do.

Can I go in?

Yes, of course.

You don't fool me, you're putting us on.

You look great, Jay.

I didn't have to come.

You flew here?

With your fear of flying?

I was only conscious part of the trip.

A mix of French champagne...

1st Class, to die in style,

champagne and bourbon. it knocks you out.

- Jack Daniel's. - No.

Jim Beam, it was all they had.

You can get it everywhere here.

I know.

They pumped it out of you.

A strange whisky.

How much did you take?

Are you in trouble? How could you try to kill yourself?

I didn't want to kill myself,

no way. I just lost control, that's all.

- Believe me. - I believe you.

Tell me about it later.

At home, calmly.

How long are you staying?

As long as I need to, don't worry.

Until they let me kick the shit out of you.

Tell the truth, isn't she beautiful?

Not just because I'm her mother. She is beautiful.

She is beautiful.

Just like her mother. It's true.

Thank you, even if

It's just a compliment.

I'll show you around.

The living room and the kitchen.

Poor middle class, struggling professionals.

- The country we live in. -You chose it.

- Is she asleep? -Yes.

Speak quietly.

- A coffee would be nice. - Coffee?

Herb tea. if I have coffee I won't sleep.

- Would you like some scotch? - Not now.

We have to speak in private.

And don't bug us.

You've hardly eaten.

For a while,

try to eat well.

You need a couple of months to recover from the shock.

Stop smoking,

don't drink, whatever.

Take care of yourself.

I will, doctor.

If you're a bit depressed, go see an analyst.

Dad hates them.

He says bartenders are better.

He's right.

You might say I'm being a pain,

but finding a job would help.

I can help you if you really

want to work.

Study, Jay,

study anything. You'll be out of trouble for 6 years.

Good advice.

Tell me about "Dog".

Is it stronger than coke? is it easy to get?

Have some more mousse.

Chocolate!

Delicious!

I don't know

what I can say to you.

I'm sure you do.

Go on, out with it.

It's Jay.

I'll be brief.

He's 19

and acts as if he was 14.

He doesn't study or work, or do anything.

I can't control him, he ignores me.

And now, this suicide thing...

I don't know why he did it,

and he may try again.

He needs a father.

You left 5 years ago.

- I didn't leave, you did. - He needs a father.

Migue doesn't have a strong character.

- Before you said... - Just to hurt you.

You've seen the apartment and Jay's room.

The baby sleeps in his room now.

He sleeps on the sofa.

He knows he doesn't have a place.

We don't have enough money to buy a bigger place.

But you had the baby.

I thought about it.

Am I going to get an abortion

so a 19 year-old jerk

who should be living alone

has his room with his toys?

Are you shitting me?

The problem's clear.

You want your son to go.

That's mental agility!

Forget the problem,

think about a solution.

Squeeze your brain and we'll see if you find one.

I've lived alone 5 years.

I don't want to live with anyone.

I enjoy living alone.

We couldn't last a week living together.

So what do we do?

Buy him a gun so it'll work?

Does he want to go to Spain?

I don't know. Ask him.

Don't talk about living there.

Take him as a vacation.

Tell him it's just for a month.

He won't mind.

It'd do you well to be a father.

It's not definitive, we'll just try it.

Like the sex we may have, you have nothing to lose.

We may have?

Now you know.

Look, Martin.

I think like you do.

I'm shit, but I am what I am.

I love your son,

but nothing, see,

nothing,

neither him nor anybody else

will make me lose all this.

Since when do you read?

For a couple of years. But not much.

It's a start.

Why didn't you read?

To rebel against me?

No. it bored me.

And because you said only retards don't read.

I never said that.

I just didn't want you to miss a great pleasure.

You're a retard if you miss it.

Read and let me sleep.

And read that one more than once.

He's great. And wise,

he wrote five novels and stopped.

Why?

Because he's wise.

Jesus, Martin, it's so good to see you!

You're a man, now! So handsome!

- You've changed a lot in 5 years. -You haven't.

Less hair, but I'm in shape.

But with you it's amazing.

Time passes, kids grow, it's a small world. Let's go.

Not every kid has Jay's luck,

to look so much like his mother.

Don't you have a smaller one?

This one is for professionals.

Do you play well? What style?

- Hardcore. Heavy Metal, Punk. - A little strong for me.

What about the Stones? Blues?

- Blues. -That I can take.

Something like Hendrix?

I wish. He was the best.

If you like Hendrix, there's still

hope for you.

Jay seems to be in good shape.

He's got his head together.

Have you talked to him?

Jay never talks, Dante, at least not with me.

Even when he was small I never got through to him.

He doesn't listen or talk.

He says he didn't want

to kill himself, but he's lying.

- It's not strange. He's like you. -Worse.

I shouldn't have brought him. I should have said no,

we'll end up killing each other.

Don't exaggerate. It's just a month.

With a bit of effort...

It's not a month.

He's going to stay here.

Liana says she doesn't have room for him.

Don't tell Jay.

I have to make him stay.

He doesn't need convincing.

But you do.

What's your problem?

Fathers and sons live together.

I'd think you'd want him near you.

Not want it...

It's worse.

It's much stronger.

If you had kids,

you'd know.

It's really true that you would die for your son.

You're terrified that something may happen to him.

You want to always be with him,

but you know you can't.

You're afraid that he may suffer and you can't

even think he could die.

Thinking that makes you panic because you know

If that ever happened,

you won't suffer,

you'll be destroyed.

You'd be alive, but not exist.

If he dies, you die with him.

As simple as that.

But all this doesn't mean we can live together.

We can't.

I feel the same way about him.

Bullshit.

- And don't say I don't love him. - I did it to bug you.

I know, but it hurts me.

At times I want

to convince myself I don't love him.

When I realize how far away he is and I get scared.

I know I can't change the way I feel,

but I try to think I don't love him. It's too painful.

ljust think it.

Yet I don't like it,

thinking it makes me a bastard.

If he can't live with you, he can live with me.

In the hotel?

Living in a hotel is the most depressing thing a person can do.

Not for you because you're nuts.

It's a nice hotel, it's not depressing.

He won't be living alone.

There are big suites with three rooms.

I get along with him. If he agrees, it's a solution.

The worst thing for a confused kid who flirts with drugs

would be to live with you.

I'm your friend, I accept you and I don't judge you.

But you'd be a terrible influence.

Don't exaggerate.

I'm someone who lives according to his ideas.

You'd like me to talk about freedom against moral crap,

but without having the balls to live like I do.

You're as amoral as I am, but you don't practice it.

What when Jay sees the parade

of faggots, whores, teenage junkies

that fuck you for a fix and late night drug dealers?

Talk about his overdose,

while you spend three days doing coke,

smoking opium and taking and odd shot of heroin?

And let's not mention booze...

You'll change your lifestyle?

You can quit all that?

I can quit it,

but I won't.

I won't go against my ideas.

I don't feel guilty, I'm an Epicurian,

I live for pleasure,

and I think that's an intelligent choice.

I'll live the way I always have.

I will promise you I'll be very discreet.

He'll know I'm up to something, but he won't know what.

Discreet, my ass.

Your favorite sport is breaking the limits.

You love to lose control and despise what others think.

You really think that in the middle of those mental orgasms

you'd be able to be discreet?

It's the best wine you'll ever try.

- You do like wine? - Sometimes.

Do you try different kinds?

Table wine. Our budget is tight.

You like Miguel Angel?

He's all right. Boring, but nice.

What is "Supreme a Ia Kiev"?

I think it's done with plums.

The "Maryland", then.

The specialty here is fish.

Order a lamprey,

It's delicious.

I don't like fish. And "Charlotte".

Madrid's best restaurant, and you order like a whore.

Whenever you invite a whore to dinner, she orders

Maryland Supreme and Charlotte.

Order what you want.

That's the way to taste it?

- You look like an expert. - I know a little.

A lamprey and a Maryland Supreme.

Endives and Ham to start with.

- Yes, sir. -Thank you.

What have you been up to?

Your rock group is doing well?

It's Hardcore. We're not a real band, we just like to play.

We're not interested in being professionals.

I would've liked to be a musician.

If you like it, take it seriously.

Playing by ear is great, but you should learn some theory.

There's some good music schools in Madrid.

I'd like to,

but I've only got a month.

Why just a month?

Why not stay a couple more?

You need to get back?

You don't need to choose

a date.

Stay as long as you like.

- I might live here. -Why not?

You lived here till you were 14, it's your

hometown. Same as there.

Please, dad!

Stop the con job.

This isn't a vacation.

You have to make me stay.

Mom doesn't want me there.

I can tell how she feels.

She wants me out of there.

You can stop the sales job. I'm staying,

I have no choice but to stay.

No. No one is forcing you to stay.

You can leave if you don't like it here.

The choice is yours.

I like Madrid, I don't mind staying.

But you don't want me living in your house.

You're completely wrong.

It's not easy for me. I've lived alone

for 5 years, I have my routine,

and I have a rotten character. I can't change so quickly.

It's not easy for anyone to live under the same roof.

But my house is your house.

You'll be fine.

Madrid is a good city.

You miss Argentina? Never wanted to go back?

All that homesick stuff is bullshit.

You can't miss a country. Maybe you can miss

a neighborhood.

Anyone who believes he belongs to a country is a half-wit.

Countries are an invention.

"The Argentine people" are as strange to me

as Catalonians or Portuguese. They're just statistics.

You're part of very few people.

Your friends are your country. You miss them, but your get over it.

If someone can get out

of Argentina he should do it.

It's a country

that fucks with you.

If you take it seriously, if you think you change it

you're fucked.

It's a country without a future, the people

who've plundered it

won't let you change it.

Countries are bullshit, ok.

But you're very pessimistic. Everything can be changed.

We're not worse than other places.

Argentina's different. It's not a country.

It's a trap.

There's a carrot and stick there:

what you said, "it can change".

The trap is making you believe it can change,

you feel close, you think that it's possible,

It's coming soon, tomorrow.

Then they fuck you over.

The military kill 30,000 people

or democracy comes and there's no money,

and you have to die of hunger and the only thing

you can do is try to survive

and keep what you have.

If you don't die, you betray yourself.

And then dare say we're all guilty!

Fascists are smart,

they're sons of bitches,

but they're intelligent. They think in long term

objectives.

Tell me about yourself. I've talked too much.

How's the wine?

Don't swallow it immediately, keep it in your mouth.

The flavor is complicated,

you'll note it tastes like grapes, fruit, wood...

It's like reading. A pleasure you can't let yourself miss.

- I'd be an idiot if I missed it. - Completely.

It's great.

Incredible.

I'll be a drunk, not an idiot.

At first we thought you'd spend a year with her and one with me.

But school made that impossible.

Your mom could take better care of you than I.

Mothers have to take care of their kids,

they've done it for centuries.

They do it better than anyone.

Jay! You're Jay?

I finally meet you. Welcome.

I'm glad you're well again. I'm Alicia.

You don't know who I am.

He didn't tell you about me. Of course not.

There's more beer in the fridge.

- What are you doing here? - Dante said you'd arrived.

You could have called.

I did, but you weren't here.

It bothers you?

You gave me a key, I didn't.

Think I needed permission.

What's that?

This?

Coke.

I don't want drugs here!

I know, I know. I'm sorry, but it was a gift.

A gift from my friend Carmen.

Ithought we could try a bit.

Just once...

Get that out of here.

I'm going to bed. Have a good time.

I'm sure you will.

- Goodnight. - Goodnight.

- Nice meeting you. - See you later.

Goodnight, dad.

Your son is very clever. He's charming.

Have some. It's great.

Go away and take it with you.

Why are you so pissed off?

Call before you come here. I don't live alone now,

what will my son think?

What can he think?

That you're old but that you're still sexy enough

to have a much younger lover who's crazy about you.

Kids know their parents fuck, Martin.

I'm talking about the coke.

The coke, the coke...

He had an overdose. How can I tell him

not to take drugs if he sees me take them? Now, Alicia,

get the fuck out of here.

L'm going,

and you can go fuck yourself.

And I'm going to take all of this.

I won't even leave one line for you.

You won't have any.

You're getting old and reactionary.

You talk like an old woman.

Your son understood everything and he's pissing himself laughing.

He'll laugh even more if you play the "model father".

If he takes drugs,

he'll still do it. He must know more than I do.

All teenagers do drugs!

The sixties are over, Martin,

although you didn't realize that.

Here's your keys.

Stick them up your ass.

Yes??

Do you know what time it is? Can't you play at a normal time.

I felt like it. If It's an order, I'll stop.

Play all you want to.

But can you turn it down?

Yes.

Did I wake you?

Yes, it's me, Martin.

Yes, he's fine. He's here.

Thanks. Listen, José. you have a director.

I want to do the movie.

Wait, slow down. I'll do it under two conditions.

Two weeks to fix the screenplay.

Fine.

The other is that Dante W. Gomez play the lead.

I don't need to think, I've decided. You liked the idea, too.

That's no secret. Dante has the balls to admit it,

but have you seen him on drugs?

No one has.

He's never missed a day of filming or a show

because he was fucked up. He never takes drugs when he's working.

That's another question.

He does what he can to be disagreeable,

but he's a professional and a great actor.

The best one to play "the Pimp".

There's no deal without Dante.

Good morning.

I need the tape with the outtakes, there's one shot...

Hello.

Lots of work?

Almost none.

Don't you know it's summer?

A movie?

A commercial.

15 seconds.

I need to turn it in today,

so since you don't have anything to do here, leave.

You left this at home.

I'm making the movie.

I came to ask you to be the editor.

I don't know. If I don't get a better offer, maybe.

Keep them. I already told you what to do with them.

They're yours, Alicia.

I want you to forget what happened.

I was a bastard and I apologize.

It was because I'm worried about my son.

I know.

I'll let you work.

Don't call me for a few weeks, I'm going south.

I wasn't going to call you.

I'll be looking for locations.

Cadiz, Mojacar, Almeria...

I'll be using José's house.

It's next to the sea, with a pool. Not bad.

I'm not here just to apologize.

I want you to come.

I want you to be with me.

Do you think I feel like being with you after what you did?

- Have you got everything? - Yes.

Call Alicia and tell her we're on our way.

The video camera!

- Where is it? - On the bed.

Take care of him for me.

Don't let him alone for too long.

And no drugs. And don't bring your lover boys.

Jay knows me and accepts me.

I don't care. A gram of coke and I'll cut your balls.

If you're so afraid, take him with you.

I'm not on vacation.

But you're taking Alicia. Don't bullshit me,

you won't admit that you don't like being a father.

Relax. He'll be better with me.

- What do you think? - It's very good.

It's kind of old fashioned.

Classics don't grow old.

But he didn't make classics. He's no genius, he knows

his job. He can tell a story.

Take it as a praise:

few directors get that far.

Very few respect the profession they've chosen.

- Have you thought about movies? - Never.

About following in your dad's footsteps? It's the rule.

Never. I like to see them, I go a lot. But that's all.

I wish you would,just to see his face when he realizes

you're better.

Don't worry about competing with him.

- You'd be better than him. -Why?

Movies matter if they deal with people,

and you see people, but your dad just sees himself.

- I don't know. - He wants it that way.

His films have his style, but he's not in them,

- not his heart. - I may be the same.

Bullshit! You're completely lucid, like me.

You see people as they really are.

You meet someone and you

know who they are.

You were like that as a kid, and you still are.

It's a gift, a perception, feminine intuition.

Whatever... And you have it.

Why "feminine"?

In my case, it's clear. in yours, we'll have to see.

We're "X-Ray Men".

"The invaders", because we recognize each other.

"The invaders" had a stiff finger,

we have a limp wrist.

Dante, do you have something?

I have to take a leak.

Something to cheer us up tonight.

I know some jokes.

Come on, Dante. Hash, coke?

Why did you want to kill yourself? You can't quit before you start!

I didn't want to do it. I don't know why

but no one believes me.

What happened?

I wanted to leave home. I was in love

but she wouldn't come with me.

That hurt, but I didn't want to kill myself.

I did get drunk. I was upset and I wanted to forget her,

but I couldn't.

They gave me the stuff and I took more than I could stand.

I didn't do it on purpose.

My life's not wonderful, but I don't want to die.

I don't care if I die. But I'm alive,

so I go on.

You have to go on, if just out of curiosity.

Fine, you've found someone who believes you.

What about drugs?

Tell me about it,

you can be open, I'm an addict. Are you hooked?

Not at all.

Joints, coke,

I don't say no, I like it, but I don't go crazy over it.

Do you buy it often? Once a month, once a week?

I've never bought it.

Fine. Excuse me, I've got to take a leak.

I'll cut you a line in a second.

If your dad finds out, I'm dead. A little is harmless,

I want it to be clear

that it's just for today. Don't ask me for it again.

I'm not your dealer.

Not all drugs are pleasurable.

They can make you panic, or fill you with angst.

I'm not an addict. I say I am

to shock people, but I'm not.

I love drugs. I've tried all I've been able to find.

I went to Mexico just for peyote.

But I don't take them to feel pleasure

or to escape .

Drugs open your mind,

and make you see that truth doesn't exist.

They give you another vision.

They make you see that nothing is what it seems.

All there is your reality, what you're capable of seeing.

Don't be afraid of them,

you're lucid, you have to try them.

Never lose control,

there's no danger if they

don't control you.

I was hooked on heroin, and I almost couldn't get off it.

I left Madrid and spent six months in hell,

but I got off it. Many can't.

They'll offer it to you, but don't accept it.

It's not pure, It's crap. Deadly.

If you want to try it, try it with me. But you shouldn't.

It's too good. Besides,

I'd have to tell your father.

Do you mind going back home alone?

Don't wait up for me,

I'll be late.

Give me a line.

No way. You've had enough for today. Bedtime, kid.

You're not going to sleep?

How did it go?

Less than what I expected,

but it wasn't bad.

Keep playing.

Go on. Did you write that?

It's very pretty.

Keep playing.

Are you active or passive?

None of your business. Don't be indiscreet.

I've wondered since I was a kid and knew you were gay.

Don't tell me if you don't want to.

When a man goes to bed with another man,

It's the same as with a woman: you do what gives you pleasure.

You do, she does. Give and take.

Do you like men better than women?

In general? No.

I don't care about what sex people belong to.

I feel equally attracted by men or women.

The pleasure isn't in fucking. It's like drugs.

I'm not attracted to a good ass,

a pair of tits, a fat cock...

Well, yes I'm attracted to them, I adore them!

They don't seduce me.

Minds seduce me, intelligence seduces me.

I like a body when it moves and shows it has a mind

that's worthwhile knowing.

To know, possess, dominate, admire...

Minds, Jay. I make love with minds.

The real pleasure is to fuck minds.

I've lived in hotels since I left home at 19.

Or in friends' houses, but not for much time.

I lost them by staying too long.

Now I'm more prudent

and I won't be part of the privacy of those I love.

They can't stand a witness of their private misery.

My parents' house wasn't a house.

It was a birdcage.

Six of us in a room like this.

I'd like a house by the sea,

right next to it, no neighbors.

Me, too, but

when I'm seventy.

Your own house

is a tomb, Jay. It's the end of the journey.

And you can't make an effort to get it.

If it comes, only accept it if you're tired of life

and you feel like a corpse

that has to lie down on the grass.

Cheer up.

The play isn't bad and brilliant.

If you get bored, wait for me outside.

I told you not to buy it.

A friend gave it to me.

I'd like to try it.

But don't tell my father.

Shooting is better than smoking?

It lasts longer and it's more intense.

You did smoke it?

It made me feel good. Very good.

Is it good?

The color's weird, but I suppose it's okay.

We'll see. We have to go

or we'll be late.

It has to be tonight.

I'm going back to Buenos Aires.

I'll go tomorrow if I can.

Did you tell your dad?

We haven't talked since he left. Can you tell him?

Yes. But what do I say? I don't understand.

What did your mother say?

She doesn't know. She calls to hear me say I'm staying

but she doesn't ask.

I'm not going home, I have no home.

That's stupid.

If you go, it's because you want to.

Who was ruling when they did it?

A peasant.

Why did all this happen?

The war. Too much time of war

and not enough justice.

My friend and I will tell you what my grandpa said:

"Why don't our sons die now?."

"Why don't our daughters cry now?."

"To conquer the world, they destroy huts. "

Our men are destroyed so that the rich can dine well.

The soldiers kill each other and the bosses greet each other.

The rich rule, and that's why

your sons don't die. is that how it is?

Yes, that's it!

You want to hear the end?

This isn't a drama,

it seems like one, but it's a farce.

If we reach the end, it'll be like always.

You'll stand up and applaud

and we'll bow. We'll be accomplices to the farce.

You'll go home and you won't change.

You'll be just corrupt, shitty and liars

as always. But your consciences will be at ease

because you've strongly applauded a left-wing play,

a hardcore one.

You don't like the world you live in, but that's the way it is.

You can't change it and you have to play the game. But you aren't

guilty because

you can still cry over the revolution that could have been.

You fake sons of bitches! You deserve my deepest contempt.

I've been your buffoon for a year.

I'm ashamed of not having the guts to say this before.

I refuse to be your accomplice. The farce will go on,

but I won't be in it anymore.

Let's go, kid. Let's go.

Are you serious?

I've never been so serious.

Dante, please! You can't do this to me!

You have no right to do that. Come back!

You're a drugged-out faggot asshole, Dante!

I'm not on drugs.

I feel better than if I'd shot up.

It was great. They didn't know how to react.

You're crazier than I thought.

But they'll think you were stoned. They won't call you.

Who knows? I've lived up to my reputation.

I've never worked stoned, though they say I do.

Now they have a reason to fuck me over

or to give me work. Who knows?

The scandal may be attractive.

The truth is I really needed a vacation.

We'll go south. Stop thinking about Buenos Aires

and heroin and come with me.

If you won't be an immigrant, you're a tourist.

You have to have fun.

Two weeks, and then you go.

Say yes as a favor for a friend.

All right.

I can't believe it!

How wonderful!

- Hello! - Hello!

Hello, kid!

Look, French champagne! Help me with this. Your tit's showing.

What have you brought? What is all that?

Tequila, cheese...

I'm going to eat like a pig.

- Where can we get ice? - At the gas station.

- Look at the bougainvillea. -Wait! Please!

Be sincere and tell us if we're interrupting

a honeymoon kind of thing.

We can go to a hotel.

Yeah, right, a honeymoon. I'm really glad you've come.

I spend all day alone going crazy from boredom.

Your dad's in a shitty mood.

Going back to directing scares him.

I shouldn't have come,

but now you're here

- It's great. - You don't go with him?

He doesn't want me to.

I could get the same tan in Madrid,

but here at least I see him at night.

Your suntan's great.

Gold tits and copper nipples,

irresistible.

Wing bitch!

A tan makes me deadly.

What's wrong? What happened?

You should free yourself from your tragic view of life.

It's summer: in summer nothing ever happens.

We were looking for a place to relax and we made a detour

to have a drink with you.

They'll stay

a few days. There's room.

Control yourself. A gentleman should not show his joy

in such an excessive way.

There he goes!

- Is he always like that? - And worse.

He almost barks.

When you're ready, we'll go out to dinner.

- Come on. - Let's go away.

To Madrid or somewhere else.

Whenever you want, but not tonight. We have time.

- Dante. - Come in.

- Hello. - Hello.

Wow,!

- Where's Martin? - He's getting wrinkled in the bath.

He says it relaxes him. You're just in time.

- Not now, thanks. - It's here when you want some.

Try to slow down a little.

I could quit tomorrow, but I don't want to slow down.

I want to feel good, always. I won't quit.

It's something that never lets me down.

It gives me what I expect it to.

Martin doesn't let me down either.

He never gives me anything.

How can you make a guy fall in love with you?

No way, it just happens. But don't be tragic.

It can take time for someone

to fall in love or to realize that he's in love when he thought

he wasn't.

You have to keep seducing him.

Don't lose your beauty and joy.

Things aren't what they seem.

He may not know it,

but if he's with you it's because he loves you.

Or because I'm not in his way.

I'm a very comfortable woman for men.

I'm not ugly, I say yes easily,

I have orgasms even more easily.

I'm sensual, passionate, nice,

never jealous. I accept what a guy gives me,

and when it's over I don't make a fuss.

I'm modern. And a dumbshit.

Martl'n's very special, but not blind.

You're the best thing that ever happened to him.

You have light inside you. No tricks, no cheating.

He can't lose you, if he did, it would be by mistake.

I'll tell you the truth.

Martin is deeply

in love with you.

Thanks, Dante.

Even if you were lying, I don't care.

My best friend, in my own room. I've never seen

such a thing.

Come on, she's not my type.

I'm exclusively into Orientals right now.

Even a beauty like her, willing and with wet panties...

Don't be a Pig!

It was a friendly kiss.

He said sweet things to me.

It doesn't matter. If you want to fuck,

do it elsewhere. I want to sleep.

We may follow your advice,

but first we have to talk.

Yes we do. I came here to work,

not to scratch my balls.

You didn't have to come here.

I can't be social, I need to be alone.

I'd prefer to be anywhere but with you.

I came here for your son's sake.

I can't leave him alone.

He tried to kill himself again,

with sleeping pills.

I found out just in time.

I stopped him,

but just for a while.

He doesn't want to live.

All for a woman?

Can that be possible? It's absurd.

For you, the superior being

that doesn't need anyone. Lots of people die of love,

or lack of it. inferior beings

dominated by their feelings...

lt'S not because ofa woman.

Jay's lost, he has no place.

His mother and you reject him,

he doesn't know what to do, he's bored and lonely.

He doesn't have the instinct to live.

He has to get it back, and only you can help him.

You may hate it, but you're his father.

You must talk with him, even if you both don't want to.

He won't want to, I can assure you.

It had to be now!

I don't have any time, I've got a movie to do.

Location hunting and writing during the day,

the night for your son. And for Alicia, too.

I've found the locations.

Then you've got lots of time.

It's useless, Dante. If he's decided to do it, he'll do it.

I can't change that.

You don't know.

Maybe you can.

Do something, anything.

What may seem silly to you may be useful to him.

I don't understand. We gave him everything,

he was a happy kid.

He was 14 when we broke up.

It was hard for him, but he understood it. What did I do wrong?

Everything.

You sent him to expensive schools

that you despised.

How much real time did you spend with him?

None! You were with him when you had time leftover from work,

when you were tired and didn't want to talk or listen.

Just like the vast majority. You followed the code

of the radical middle class.

Don't tell me you don't have time.

Jay needs your help now.

You have to give him all the time he needs.

You owe it to him.

I can't make you do it.

If your son's not worth the effort, we'll leave.

SIMPLE VITAL INSTINCT.

CURIOSITY TO SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN TOMORROW.

THE AMAZEMENT UPON SEEING ONESELF CHANGE

THE DIFFUSE KILLER:

REASONS TO FIGHT HIM AND STAY ALIVE.

Get it out, we'll cut our feet.

Will we enjoy your company,

or are you with the screenplay?

I wasn't with the screenplay.

Read this and then we'll talk.

Your production manager should get it out.

What is it?

What?

Something he wrote.

Let's see.

I like this one.

"Looking for reasons to live is a good reason to live.

Make them up if you have to. "

What an animal!

He's made a written list to communicate with his son!

You know what he did? He gave him a text!

He gave him a text as if it were dialogue for an actor!

"The only thing that is not an utter idiocy is

to feel pleasure in doing what you like

without thinking ofa goal... "

He fucks up when he says that being a success isn't important.

The hell it isn't. it's what makes you a person.

It's great literature.

But for someone that wants to kill himself it's pure bullshit,

he'll ignore this.

He doesn't talk about pain.

He doesn't say some things hurt so much you'd rather

be dead.

It's just like him: Not at all profound,

but friendly.

He hates pain, so he decides

it doesn't exist.

It's a bunch of useless crap.

All right, I read it. Do I have to memorize it?

Can we please be serious for once?

What did you think?

It's okay.

I like the one about philosophizing in a bar.

It's familiar.

It's a good reason, but not the most important one.

Think about them all.

I didn't say I wouldn't.

It all makes sense. But why did you give it to me?

Because I wrote it for you, of course.

We can't talk, so I write.

I hope it helps you.

I don't know what else I can do.

You tell me, ask me anything.

I don't know if life's worth it, but I'm not suicidal.

I didn't need the list.

Denying the facts doesn't help.

I know you tried again.

Dante told me.

We don't have to talk now.

I'm here when you want to.

But don't lie. Not to yourself.

That won't help. it'll just fuck you over.

We'll die if we drink all that.

Three bottles each isn't that much. Open it.

Makes me sick.

We'll all be sick: Drunk.

I don't mean that.

They make me fart.

I mean it makes me pass gas, if that sounds less crude.

But I hate the way that sounds.

Flatulence.

It's better to say "fart".

Better than "break wind".

Champagne makes me fart.

Do they smell bad?

How vulgar! No,just noise.

- I'm a lady. -We'll see.

If you're a lady, the sound will be slight and you'll

cough at the same time.

If not, you're just a vulgar farter.

He's provoking me to make

- a demonstration. - Alicia!

A toast!

- I don't know what to. - I do.

I want to toast to you, the three of you.

For all you're doing for me.

Because you can stop now.

Dante brought me here because he thinks that

fathers should be with their sons.

Nothing happened in Madrid.

I didn't try to kill myself,

he lied so you'd listen to me.

He feared I'd get on heroin.

I'll say it again: I didn't want

to kill myself,

I don't want to kill myself, I don't want to die.

You three worry about me and that makes me feel good.

I love you, too,

but it's over.

Don't bug me.

Take care of yourselves.

Is it what he said true?

You mean if it's true it's not true...

Fuck you, Dante! How can you be such a son ofa bitch...?

I had no other choice!

He was thinking of going back to Buenos Aires. Right?

Not now, I'm staying here.

What's there that's not here?

Are you homesick?

I feel like a tourist here.

Look for a pretty girl, Jay.

You'll be fine with a Spanish girl.

Then you won't feel like a foreigner or an exile or a tourist.

You'll have worse problems, but if she's worth it,

you'll solve them.

I hope she's blond,

with gold tits and copper nipples.

You're very bold. And seductive.

What's that copper stuff?

Cheap poetry that I improvise when I'm horny.

Just don't get stuck on an Argentinian.

You'll be her slave.

It happened to me.

You can return when you want.

Thanks. You're charming.

Why did you come here?

Not because of your father.

He's why I don't go back, although he wants me to...

I didn't say that. I said you were free...

Free, right. Anyway...

- I met him after I came here. - Leave the soap opera for later.

When do you go?

- When you throw us out. -Tomorrow.

- Monday. - Monday.

All right.

Since you insist we'll stay...

Stay until we go. We'll leave together.

You can go on Monday, too.

Not a bad idea.

So why did you come?

I was working on a Spanish movie in Buenos Aires.

The production chief was a very nice Sevillian

who thought I was very nice,

and the niceness got so huge

that we thought it would be nice to go to Madrid

and get married.

He got me a job.

That's the nicest memory I have of my marriage.

The rest was hell.

The nice girl was a bitch,

and the nice Sevillian was an asshole.

After five months, we couldn't take it anymore.

After some healthy promiscuity,

he appeared and here we are.

A very nice story.

When you feel bad,

let time pass and things

will be better. They say.

You have to take advantage

of time. Things don't happen by themselves.

- I'm not a kid anymore. - Exactly.

My favorite sentence.

People say it to me every day.

If not, "I'm a man

- and I must do something." - It's true.

What is "being a man"?

Being strong and independent.

L think

it means freedom's over and obligations begin.

You have to do what everyone does. You work or study,

or both, and then you're a hero.

But you're shit if you do nothing.

Even if your parents have money, you either study or work.

You must work, even if it pays shit.

That's being a slave.

Whatever, but if you don't work you don't eat.

You must work.

There are many ways to live. He's right, they make you a slave.

This is serious.

Don't try to be funny.

I am serious. Work is detestable,

one must avoid it.

It's humiliating to do a job you can't stand

just to survive.

That "bread is made of one's brow" was invented

to keep us slaves, because the power needs slaves.

It's absurd saying this to a Marxist.

I know the revolution didn't come and we have to get by, but we

don't have to be stupid. Remember "exploitation of the worker"?

It hasn't changed.

Don't treat me like a retard.

I will if it's true.

Don't fight, boys.

Did I say that work dignifies you or any other bullshit?

Work, money, and society is shit!

But we have to put up with it.

The only escape is doing what you like.

That's why I tell Jay he has to do something.

If you find a job you like that you can live on,

It's not like working.

They'll still exploit you, but there's pleasure.

You're paid for having fun.

Right. if you'd started saying that...

They argue for the hell of it.

I don't know what to do. Why do I have to like something?

You don't have to. There must be something

you like.

If I had the balls,

I'd be a thief. Don't tell me

It's immoral. I don't care.

The problem is getting caught. But it must be very exciting.

I don't mean lifting TVs or pick pocketing old men,

I mean being a real professional:

robbing banks, armored cars, or big companies.

They live off those jobs. I'd love to. I like stealing,

but since I'm a chicken ljust lift cans from the supermarket.

It's silly, but It's thrilling.

After this digression, in which Alicia,

like always, has given us a cocktail

of clichés, grocery store philosophy, and stupidity,

let's get serious again.

You don't have time.

You need it, but you don't have it.

You must decide. Study something.

You're lucky, I can pay for your studies.

Take advantage of that.

You're living in a shitty and cruel world,

you need arms against it.

That world is not as cruel as you are.

You were a bit hard.

She knows I'm not serious.

I can't stand bullshitting.

We could use some music. Jay, bring the guitar.

- Yes, music! - No. You don't know what he plays.

- Do you play well? - All right.

He's better than he says.

Why don't you be a musician?

I'm not good enough, ljust play by ear for friends.

You don't have to read music.

Lots of guys play by ear.

Just so you won't have to listen to the sermons

of your wise progenitor.

He'll never be a musician.

We'd managed to keep his mouth shut...

Didn't you want me to talk? isn't that why you're here?

You've talked enough.

He has a good ear, but he's not interested in music.

It's just what's cool now.

Now it's the guitar, before it was the computer,

tennis, tae-kwondo, yo-yos...

The guitar is just a fashion.

A good ear doesn't guarantee a vocation,

and that doesn't guarantee talent.

At least he tried.

Now he just thinks and does nothing. That's useless, Jay.

Lying in bed looking at the ceiling makes you nothing.

You are what you do. To know what you like,

you have to try it, get into it.

Do 2O things and then stop, but do something, now.

You have to stop being such a vegetable...

The urgency's yours.

You need to know his future.

Just be calm and keep thinking,

- don't rush. -There's so much bullshit, I'm lost.

But I get the idea that you need him to be creative,

that he has to choose something "artistic",

and do it well.

I didn't say that.

I didn't say you did. But that was the message.

You want him to be what you couldn't be.

You have no fucking idea

what I could have been.

And you need 248 more neurons to be sarcastic,

so don't try it again.

- Don't make a fool out of yourself. - She's not.

- I agree with her. - Heroin has killed your neurons.

Have I ever told you what I wanted you to do?

No. He can be what he wants, as long as he's something.

I know he won't be like me.

His thing is something else.

"Artistic" things aren't right for him.

God has spoken.

Luckily your son has all the neurons we don't

and doesn't listen to you.

It's still bullshit.

I say what I see.

We know about his music.

He reads a bit, but he's lost a lot of time,

I couldn't make him open a book. Film, not much.

Theater, nothing.

Lots of TV, though. He's spent whole days watching it,

whatever was on. If the screen went blank,

he'd keep watching it.

Where's his vocation? Does anyone see his vocation?

Maybe I have a talent for being mediocre.

Don't get upset.

Don't listen to him. He doesn't say what he thinks,

he just likes the sound of his own voice

and thinks he's clever.

What if I were mediocre?

No problem. But you're not.

You have all you need to be special.

You can do whatever you want to.

But if you don't decide

to do it, you will be mediocre.

If you choose that, tough luck, I have to accept it.

But could you accept me?

- You're my son... -You wouldn't.

Love means respect. And you only respect intelligence.

Even with your son.

You'd take away his surname.

He doesn't have his own name. Why does he have yours?

I don't know.

Family tradition.

Our sons are named after their father.

But you like it!

It's a stupid tradition, but you do like it,

it makes you feel like a patriarch,

a monster macho! You love it!

You could've given

him a middle name. He has no name!

He's not Martin, you are! You call him "Jay".

Jay for Junior.

Martin, parenthesis, Jay. I like it. Do you mind, Jay?

Not only doesn't he have a name, but you call him Jay.

"Jay" means nothing, it's just another "G",

and it's locked between brackets.

You scrubbed him! If you scrub your own son, what can we expect?

Enough champagne.

Did I "pass gas"? I'm drinking tequila.

Stop.

I don't want to hear the answer.

But someday I would like

you to tell me if I deserve your respect.

I'll be right back.

He's going to fall!

Let me help.

No, I can do it alone. I'm fine.

I have to pee.

Against

my principles, I'll give you an advice: ignore him.

Dad didn't have the kids he wanted.

My sister is a nice girl, and a good mother.

She got married at 17 and she's still happily married.

You can't criticize her

or admire her.

Dad gave up on her but didn't care much.

She was his daughter,

and the real important one is the male child.

It's like that, irrational, genetic.

It must be his Basque blood, I don't know.

I was always wanting him to approve of me,

but he never did.

Nothing that I could do

had the quality or the perfection that he expected from me.

You just have to worry about what you expect.

He never said it,

it was just a feeling I had.

He never got angry with me

because of my mistakes, he encouraged me to go on.

I was lazy, I didn't like studying,

I felt like I was wasting my time. Dad agreed,

high school was a waste of time, but I had to finish it.

I fucked up over and over again and he never got mad, he never

insulted or punished me.

But I felt I let him down.

He hated it so much that he began

to draw away from me.

His male child didn't turn out like he wanted.

He accepted the defeat

and began to ignore me.

Then one day I realized he'd given up,

he didn't expect anything.

I know he loves me,

he wants me to be well,

but that's all.

He doesn't expect anything.

I robbed him of a parent's golden dream:

one day to be proud of what his son has achieved.

Feel better?

I threw up. Champagne kills me.

And it was so expensive...

You're going to swim?

It's hot and I'm not tired.

You've taken enough coke to stay awake a week.

That's my problem.

Someday it'll get you.

But I'll be haPPY-

Are you more sober now?.

Can you understand me?

Perfectly.

Relax a bit with your son.

You're being aggressive, that won't help.

That's my problem.

He's my son, I know how to treat him. Stay out of it.

I won't.

I knew you'd answer that but I had to say it.

Fine. is that all?

I'm leaving.

I'm going to Madrid with them on Monday.

Take a swim, sleep a bit, and then we'll talk.

I'm leaving.

I'll say the same thing tomorrow and Monday.

Whatever you want.

Stay if you want. But if you go, I won't ask you

to stay.

Look, I know I acted badly,

that you're angry with me.

But you know me,

you know I don't mean it.

If you want to go to Madrid, fine. I'll see you there.

You don't get it. I'm not just going to Madrid.

It's over, there's nothing more to talk about.

I can't go on like this.

Not because of what you say when you're drunk.

We're not well together.

I want it over

before it gets ugly.

We're not well?

I'm not well.

I don't know who I am. I'm like your wife but I'm not.

After a year together, I'm still alone,

and I can't be alone.

I thought it was something like that.

You're afraid it will get ugly? it will if we live together.

Why does it have to be?

And if so, why?

If it doesn't work out, we say goodbye and that's it.

It's never that easy.

I don't want to risk losing what we have.

I don't want to live with anybody,

I'm used to being alone.

I like being with you, but I like living alone.

Is it hard to understand?

Not at all.

It's very clear.

I thought I was special, but I'm just another nobody.

No, don't be silly.

It's over, Martin.

Don't call me, don't ask me to work with you.

I don't want to see you.

Not now, not until I can...

I need to know

lf l can live without you.

The nightcap.

I can't drink any more.

That feels great!

Let's go to the beach.

I can't move a muscle.

I'm worse than him.

- Your dear old man has abandoned us? - I guess so.

What time do we leave on Monday?

Early.

We have lunch in Almeria

and we catch the 5:00 train.

Did you fight?

It's over, that's all.

Starting now, I'm a free woman. And available.

You have been warned.

That's good to know. But I'm not up to it now.

You're leaving me alone?

Come on, Jay.

Let's go. Let's go.

Come on.

Jay!

No woman is a man's property.

Careful with the step.

It's not his fault. It's nobody's fault.

Anyway, it'd be my fault for not accepting

things the way they are.

It was obvious that there was no future in our relationship.

Because of his age?

Because of that,

because we're used to

living alone and not having to answer to anyone.

Your dad says after you turn 50, friends are less important,

women are great for a short time,

and that your favorite thing is solitude.

Everything was clear from the beginning.

But one idiot fell in love.

So, to hell with freedom, his age, independence...

She lost her head, but he didn't.

Dad is locked into himself.

He'll never say he loves you or that he needs you or anybody.

If he doesn't say it, it's because he doesn't

feel it or feel it strongly.

But it's over, let's not talk about it.

Life starts again. it will hurt

but not for long.

I can be a real whore when I want to.

If you were

ten years older, no, five,

I'd have raped you by now.

Me, too.

What does that mean?

You're very pretty.

I love you very much.

I can't do this to you.

He's your dad

and I'm his woman.

You'd feel terrible.

I want to fuck you,

I want us to fuck.

I want you to fuck me so I can feel alive.

Because I'm lost, you understand?

I'm lost.

I wanted to be your mom...

I wanted to be your mom.

Forgive me.

Forgive me.

I feel better.

Don't worry.

I'll be right there.

Go on.

What's wrong?

Did you love Alicia?

I think you loved her a lot.

I don't know if you knew it.

Now you'll know you loved her

more than anyone.

Are you drunk?

I wish you pain, Martin.

A pain so intense you can't stand it,

but that doesn't kill you.

A pain that will keep you alive and that will never end.

36 pills and all that coke...

That mixture never fails.

I'm going.

Stay for dinner.

- You have something to do? - Leave.

Stay, don't be an asshole.

Another character should say that. Change the dialogue.

You should say something like "Go, I want to be alone".

With a harsh voice.

You're just an actor. I know about dialogues.

- Sit down. - I'm leaving.

If I stay I'll say things

I shouldn't.

Stay, but don't talk.

There's nothing to say.

It's useless.

First you lost your wife

without doing anything

to keep her.

You didn't want to lose her.

Now you've lost Alicia. it wasn't suicide,

you killed her.

She did it because of you.

You didn't want to lose her, either.

You always lose what you love most.

Now you only have Jay.

You're losing him, too.

What about you?

What right do you have to say that? What about you?

Do you have a wife, a son, a lover? You don't have shit!

- Take care of yourself. - I used to have a family.

Jay, you, and Alicia were my family.

I'm your family or your secret love?

Yes??

Dad?

Are you okay?

I'm ashamed I didn't put you on the list.

I was going to, but I didn't.

I put down a lot of bullshit,

but not the most important thing.

My list, not yours.

The only reason I have to stay alive.

You weren't on the list...

But you're all I care about.

What I love most.

All I have.

I love you very much, kid.

Yes??

Have him come up.

Come in.

I'll come back...

No, she's a friend. Sit down.

Her name's Charito.

She probably doesn't know you're here.

Let's have dinner.

- You'll have to pay, I'm broke. - My father's paying.

I don't want to see him.

That's why I came.

Grab a beer, I'll take a shower.

If you want to get laid, she'll be delighted.

Read 'w.

If you agree, sign it.

I already signed one.

This is different.

The numbers.

Not bad, rig ht?

We're doing it with Miramax, in English,

and Jessica Lange's reading your screenplay.

If she says no, Julia Roberts is waiting.

- It's the deal of my life! - Congratulations.

More time, more money for all of us.

For me and for everybody.

Your English is good,

- right? - Okay. Dante speaks it very well.

He used to live in New York.

Dante's out.

He's not doing it.

We were skeptical, and after what he did

in the theater, he was vetoed.

The Americans say it's out of the question.

They're very sensitive about drugs.

I know he's your friend,

but there's not a chance.

- We were hoping you wouldn't come. - Give me a break!

- You don't skimp. - Since you're paying...

- Did it go well? - Fine.

I'm off the project.

You got scared.

I knew you'd find some excuse not to do it.

I was scared, but that's not the reason.

- What happened? - What always happens. Cheapness.

A smaller budget, less time, less quality.

They say the audience won't notice.

I prefer not to do it.

There'll be others.

If you don't do it, they'll tell me to fuck off.

Who is going to do it?

- Jorge Gundl'n. - Gundl'n!

He's nice, he's a friend.

All is not lost, I still have a chance.

- Good evening. - The usual. Steak. Blue.

- Hello? - It's José. I'm coming over.

- We have to talk. - He's not here. I'm his son.

- When's he coming back? - Late.

- Where can I find him? - I don't know.

Goddamn it... Can you give him a message?

Tell him he has to make the movie, it's his movie!

- What's your name? - Martin. Martin, Jr.

- Jay between brackets... - Jay.

Do me a big favor.

Convince him to stop being so pig-headed and to do the movie.

I know he's Dante's friend, but he's also a professional,

for Christ's sake!

And he doesn't know something. Apart from the drug thing,

Dante'd still out.

We've got Andy Garcia!

Andy loves the screenplay and he wants your dad to direct.

- Andy Garcia! Can he say no to that? - No.

Of course not. I'm glad you agree. Tell him that.

Tell him to call me.

- Thanks, kid. - You're welcome.

Why are you here?

Are we doing something?

Are you in trouble?

There's coffee in the kitchen.

I'll get Jay.

Jay isn't here.

He went out.

He left me this at the hotel.

A videotape?

I haven't seen it.

It must be a message. He went to Buenos Aires.

I guess Dante's told you.

I'm going to Buenos Aires.

I'll send you my address.

I know you'll be upset, but don't get angry, dad.

I like Madrid and I like living with you.

We got along in the end.

I'll miss you.

And Dante, too.

I'll miss both ofyou, but I must go back.

I don't know why.

I don't know what I miss or if I miss anything.

The roofs,

it may be the building roofs, they're so ugly.

White and square, with water tanks.

It's as if people hated them, as if they

weren't part of the houses.

In Madrid they're beautiful,

with slates and chimneys.

No comparison.

But I miss the roofs of Buenos Aires.

It's stupid, but true.

That's not why I'm going.

I feel like

I don't belong in Madrid,

that I have to do something for the city to accept me,

and I'll have to do it many times.

I feel accepted in Buenos Aires.

I don't have to think where I am.

I can do anything.

The city's mine, I'm in the city and it's in me.

I don't have to do anything to belong to it.

It's absurd, but I feel protected.

Sorry to say goodbye like this, but it's for the best.

You don't like goodbyes.

And you might try to convince me to stay

and you could succeed.

Hove you, old man.

I like living with you.

I may come back some day.

I hate doing this, but I have to do it.

I don't know why, but I have to.

I'm not a kid anymore.

I don't know what I am,

but I'm me and you're you and we can't

live the same life.

I'm feel good when I'm with you, but I feel like a child.

I have to learn to be alone.

I have to know if! have the balls to be alone.

You must be waiting for me to say I know what to do.

Not at all.

I'm just like always, thinking.

That's about it.

My flight's at one,

but I must tell Dante something.

Dad didn't fight with Navarro Casas over the budget.

It's because of you.

They said no like always

and he said he wouldn't do it.

Navarro Casas told me.

Last night he told me to convince you to do it.

Instead of Dante, they have Andy Garcia, who's worse but has hair.

I'm giving you the message.

I didn't say anything to him,

but I know you won't do it.

I'm 901719-

Bye, dad.

Bye, Dante.

Bye.

Go see Alicia every now and then.

Although you hate it,

do it for me.

He's a poet. A poet and a philosopher.

Your son's a genius.

Go to hell.

I'm calling Navarro Casas. Tell him you'll do the movie.

You're not a genius, you can't be so capricious.

- I won't do it. -They'll think we're lovers.

You can't lose this chance.

It's normal for them not to accept me.

Hola. Navarro Casas, please.

You're an asshole.

You warned me.

You said I was losing him.

I did what I could, what seemed best.

I still lost him.

You're decidedly obtuse. You don't understand anything.

You should be proud. He did what he had to do:

start living.

You didn't lose Jay,

you've never been so close.

You know what I missed about Buenos Aires?

Whistling...

People whistling in the streets.

No one does that here.

It took me

a few months before I realized that.

I almost went back.

It made me want to go back.

But I got over it.

It was ridiculous.

You can't go back 'cause you want to hear people whistle.

Welcome to the corny and sentimental gay's club.

To Jay. To dumbshits like you

that do anything to defend a friend.

I didn't do it for you.

I can't work with someone I can't trust,

that has no word.

- A question of principles. - All right.

Can we just toast?

To Martin.