Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

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Hey, look at this, Jeff.

There's something wrong with this symbol.

It doesn't fit the rest of the wall.

Stop right there!

Where were you?

Guys, I've found a major clue. This could lead to...

You're here to help,

not to play at being an archaeologist.

Clean the brushes.

Wow, that was awesome, guys.

Put out that torch, you'll burn the place down.

Use a flashlight, it's the 21st century.

Guys, I think it could be important.

Okay, let me see.

-Can you read it? -Please.

Find the true path and its detours.

Trust a stranger,

he is the wisdom.

Well, typical mind voidness. It doesn't mean anything.

Guys, I've got it.

I think I know what to do.

Yeah, I told you, clean the brushes.

What? No!

I think we just need to press here.

Huh?

Who's going to tell his girlfriend?

Oh! Woah!

Ah!

What the...?

Jeff, don't touch! Jeff!

No, no, no, no, no!

Would you please stop?

What's this doing in Mexico?

An Egyptian sarcophagus?

Ah!

Jeff, run! Jump!

Come on, buddy. Come on! Hurry!

Woooah!

Woooah!

Jeff!

Jeff, stay right there!

Woooah... Ooh!

Oh, no!

No, no, no, stay there, Jeff!

No, don't, don't, don't... stop!

Stop! Oh, no!

Sara, Sara, you won't believe what I found.

What happened down there? How did you fall down an abyss?

Are you okay?

Totally! It wasn't that big of a deal.

No problem, I can fix it.

You idiot! You're completely useless!

It'll take us days to open up another cave.

Okay, I'm sorry, if you just let me...

No! I won't "just let you", Stones.

How can I put it? In Sumerian?

In Etruscan?

This team is formed

of the world's most prestigious archaeologists.

And the brightest ones.

And the coolest ones.

And that's not you!

Okay. It's just that down there there's actually no...

Look, it was an accident.

We were one step away

from finding the Treasure of King Pakal.

Don't defend him.

Look, I'm sorry,

but there's no treasure down there.

Just an Egyptian sarcophagus...

How you managed to convince us to bring along this amateur

incapable of telling Egyptian symbology

apart from pre-Colombian!

He hasn't even finished his degree.

At his age!

Yeah, all right. But I've had adventures

no-one could teach you in a classroom.

Oh, what adventures? Pray tell.

Please, do enlighten us.

Well, i...

You're a danger to archaeology.

-You're out! -What?

And don't forget to take that dog

and your demented parrot with you.

What has Belzoni ever done to you?

He eats my fajitas!

Tad, don't let them get to you.

If they knew I found Paititi and the collar of King Midas...

I know, but we both agreed.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

"It's too dangerous and best to keep it a secret".

Chin up, Tad.

You and I know what we discovered.

I promise you there was a sarcophagus down there.

I believe you, but this is their expedition.

I'll go back to Chicago with you.

No, I feel guilty enough already.

This is too important

for you to bail on the team.

I just wanted to be a part of it.

Don't worry, Tad. Your time will come.

Sooner or later, everyone will realize

just how great an archaeologist you are.

Tad, I feel I should go back with you.

Are you sure you want me to stay?

Huh? Oh! Sure, sure... Please, stay, I'm totally fine.

Okay.

I'll see you in Chicago.

I have something that may interest you.

I know.

It's been found.

Home sweet home.

Jeff, come here!

Jeff, come back! Come back here!

No. Give me that right now! Jeff!

Jeff!

-Miscreant! -Hello, Mrs. Wolfstrom.

The tenants are very concerned

about the goings-on in your apartment.

Every night there are shouts,

thuds and it stinks to death in there!

Stinks to what?

And the number of odd parcels that keep arriving!

Admit it! You're a smuggler!

I'm going to call the police!

-The FBI, the CIA... —Okay. Goodnight. Bye!

Worst tenant in this building...

Jeff? Woah!

What the...?

Buddy!

You're back at last!

It's good to see you too.

You're back! Let me just get dressed.

I've a thousand things we can do together:

go see an NBA game, see a Lizzo concert,

try a Six Guys burger...

How do you know all this?

Thanks to the world's most incredible invention.

Internet!

Quick, record me, I'll put it on lnstazam.

You're on lnstazam?

And I've got six followers.

But how did you pay for all this?

With the other most incredible invention:

The magic plastic.

I gave you that for emergencies,

you spent all my savings on useless stuff.

Useless?

You think this is useless?

Delivery! I'll leave it by the door.

Now what have you ordered?

Oh! At last, my jet ski!

That's it! No more card for you.

Oh, I'm sorry! But I've been locked up in here

for two months all by myself.

When you came back from Paititi,

we agreed you wouldn't set foot outside.

Well, I came to have adventures with you,

not to count the cockroaches in the kitchen for all eternity.

There're 13, by the way.

We'll talk about it later, okay?

I'm not in the mood right now.

What's the matter, buddy? Tell old Uncle Mummy.

-I got fired from the dig. -What?

But you're the best archaeologist in the world.

You found me!

Right, I found you.

Which is the umpteenth thing I can't tell those guys.

Go, go, go!

Go!

Look out! Don't damage it!

Keep going. Come on, right here. Let's go.

That's freaking awesome!

Careful, slow down!

-Wow, look at that. -I can't believe it.

Egyptian symbology!

Archaic period. Fourth dynasty.

Four thousand years of antiquity.

These marks suggest that...

Tad was right.

Don't even mention that name.

The only thing he achieved was to set everything back.

I've never seen hieroglyphics like these before.

It's a very ancient dialect. It says:

"Chaos", "Destruction", "Liposuction"...

Oh no, it says: "Curses. Many curses".

It's too soon to draw conclusions.

We'll take it to Chicago, take a proper look.

This is a bullseye, guys!

Brush for dust and sand.

Not to be confused with the one for sand and dust.

Or with the brush for cleaning bones.

Nor the one for cleaning rocks.

Or the makeup brush. That's an immediate fail!

And just look at these!

The other 75 types of brushes.

You can clean anything you want with them!

Are we boring you, Mr. Stones?

Oh no, no! Professor, i...

I am happy to hear it.

Patience is an archaeologist's number two tool.

So, what's number one?

The brush!

Sara!

Ah, yes?

Hello, Mr. Stones.

Do you see that car parked in front of you?

Sorry, who is this?

All in good time.

I know what you discovered in Mexico.

Get in the car.

I'm about to propose the adventure of your life.

Um, sorry, but... Where are we going?

Um, well, at least tell me who we're...

Hmm.

Ah!

Um... Hello?

Hello, Mr. Stones!

Welcome! I am Professor Victoria Moon.

Investigator of the occult and...

You have a terrible aura.

Let me clean it up for you.

Let you... what?

Huh?

Ouch!

Huh?

There. All clean now.

Wait. You're Victoria Moon, from Mystery TV?

Twenty-four hours a day of unexplained phenomena,

astral projection and unsolved mysteries...

Two hundred years later and the enigma remains

in the spiritual world.

Tonight, in Chatting with celebrities,

we'll ask Van Gogh where he hid his ear.

And remember, the world you see

is just a fragment of the world that exists.

Umm... That's very... interesting.

Don't worry.

I know I have a poor reputation among archaeologists.

They ignore the fact

that this world is full of phenomena

that go beyond all reason...

Take a look at this.

Looks like a battle in Egypt.

It's the Great Battle of the Pharaoh Keops

against his sorcerer, Hermes Trismegistus.

Legend has it that Hermes created an object

with the power of the gods, which controlled magic:

The Emerald Tablet.

Thanks to its power, the kingdom of Keops

achieved heights of splendor never before seen.

Tired of the Pharaoh never acknowledging his merits,

Hermes decided to harness the power of the tablet

to overthrow him.

He created an enchantment

to unleash the beasts of the underworld

against Keops' armies.

But the Pharaoh discovered the plan

and hid the tablet

so that no one would ever be able to use it again.

The legend spread throughout the world.

All the great conquerors of history

searched high and low for it, hungry for its power:

Alexander the Great, Caesar, Attila the Hun...

But only one found it: Napoleon Bonaparte.

But such was the tablet's power that he could not control it.

Filled with fear,and to stop it from falling into enemy hands,

Napoleon ordered to return the tablet to its hideout

and erased all trace of its whereabouts.

But his archaeologist, Dominique Vivant Denon,

left behind an engraving that leads to the tablet.

An engraving? So where is it?

Nobody knows, but I bet all my chakras

it's in his old office in the Louvre.

The Louvre?

Dominique was the museum's first director.

But his office disappeared

during the first renovations of the building.

How do you know all this?

I've found a lot of information here in his personal diary.

But there is also a lot I can't make head or tail of.

I'd abandoned all hope of finding the tablet...

until your "little adventure" in Mexico.

How did you know that...?

And what does all this have to do with the tablet?

It's a fragment of the tablet.

It started shining three days ago.

When I found the sarcophagus!

Coincidence? I think not.

That sarcophagus contains

the remains of Hermes, the sorcerer.

Inside, there must be clues that lead to the tablet.

I need you to persuade your team to work with us.

Well, it's not exactly "my" team...

You have a good relationship with Dr. Sara Lavrof.

Yeah, but...

Tell her the sarcophagus can be opened

with the guardian's pendant.

-That thing your dog gobbled up. -Wow!

-How did you know about that? -Trust me!

When they see you know how to open it,

they'll have no choice but to listen to us.

Mummy, you'll never believe...

Look out, princess.

Yeah, I'm going to save you.

There's too many of them!

Oh! You're not my father.

No, I'm your mother.

Sara, hi! I got totally sidetracked.

Tad, turn on the TV. Hurry!

TV. Got it!

Where have you been?

—I've been calling for hours. -I'm so sorry...

You are going to flip out when you hear...

Aah!

Okay, TV is on.

This just in:

An international team of archaeologists

has located an Egyptian sarcophagus in,

hold on to your hats, Mexico!

A few hours ago, they landed back in Chicago

and were mobbed by the press about this exciting discovery.

Mummy, please!

When my team and I found the sarcophagus,

we were blown away.

Nobody could have imagined something like this.

Nobody? It was me who found it!

Talk about posers.

Giorgio Suculus, Coast International.

For years, Victoria Moon has posited

that the world's pyramids are linked by occult forces.

What are your thoughts?

Freaktoria Moon?

Sure, we called her,

but her crystal ball couldn't get a signal.

Sara, where's the sarcophagus?

In the faculty.

They'll do a press conference when they open it,

but they haven't managed yet.

Okay, guys. Bring it into position.

But I know how to do it!

Sara, that sarcophagus is the key

to finding the Emerald Tablet!

The Emerald Tablet? How do you know about that?

Yeah, well... It was Professor Moon.

But, listen, she's offered to help.

Victoria Moon got in touch with you?

Don't listen to anything that woman has to say.

Why not? Do you know her?

We went to school together.

We were friends until she got... weird.

Okay, that's fine.

Dr. Lavrof!

Tad, I have to go. i...

See you tomorrow. We'll talk about it then.

But Sara... Sara. No, no, no, wait... Sara?

It's not fair!

Well, of course not. Victoria Moon is no freak.

Thanks to her, I learned how to trap spirits in jars.

Oh! Antonio!

Finally, I've made a discovery for the whole world to see

and I'm out of the picture. Again!

I have to do something.

It's okay, Tad.

Someday you'll be able to show everybody how awesome you are.

Right.

And it's going to be tonight.

That's what I'm talking about.

Tad and Mummy on the case!

Hmm.

Hey, there you go!

You're about to open the sarcophagus!

Way to go, buddy!

I think you should be part of our team.

-What do you think? —Sure! Come on!

Wow! That's... That's...

The scrawniest mummy I've ever seen in my life.

Who dares to call me scrawny?

Sorry, I didn't mean it!

I shall devour your soul

if you do not give kiss, Tad.

Kiss? What... How do you know my name?

Gotcha! Should have seen your face.

What are you doing here?

I came back from Paititi for adventures with my bestie,

not to stay home looking after Jeff.

You brought Jeff?

Of course,

no way I was leaving him at home with Belzoni.

Okay, fine.

You can stay, but don't touch anything.

Oh!

Okay, let's see.

Hmm... this is perfect

for my hieroglyph translator app.

Huh?

Oh, poor thing. So trapped in there.

I know how you feel, bro.

Okay... So...

this is either a recipe for a cake

or a thread of a curse?

Mummy, let's not touch anything, just in case.

I'm sorry, you were saying...?

What have you done?

Wooooah!

Huh?

Uh... guys?

Belzoni! What happened?

Are you guys Okay?

Ah, Woah... What just happened?

That was intense. I'm all good, don't worry.

Your face!

My face? What happened to my face?

Your legs!

What's happening to me?

Woah... my legs!

I can't control them!

Mummy, Stop!

What part of "I can't control my legs"

do you not understand?

Woooah!

Mummy!

Hmm!

Mummy, Stop!

Just try and get a hold of yourself!

I'm trying!

Look out!

Stop it, I said!

Wooah!

Huh? Oh.

Mummy, Stop!

I can't!

Mummy! The sarcophagus!

Just get out of the way, Tad!

Mummy!

Are you okay?

Oh, what just happened?

Huh?

Come on, we have to get out of here.

Oh, wait. My backpack.

There's no time. Let's go!

How will we get out of this one?

Hmm... It's Jeff, but with Belzoni's body...

I'll call you Jeffzoni!

Huh...

Maybe Beljeff is better.

You have destroyed the faculty, you look like Dracula

and to top it all off, you're cursed!

Dracula? Awesome!

The curse... The curse!

It must have come from the Emerald Tablet.

That's it! We have to find it.

If I find it, I'll be the hero.

And they'll understand it was all one big accident.

That's my boy! So what's the plan?

We have to go to Paris.

Paris? We're going to Paris?

Victoria said Dominique's office was in the Louvre.

He had to have left a clue about the tablet.

If we could get in to do some research and...

Got it! Dominique Vivant Denon.

Born January 4th, 1747.

What? No.

We need to know where his office was.

The sketch Victoria showed me...

Bingo!

Found the sketch, Dominique's office.

So can we go to Paris now?

-There's just one problem. -What?

I'm broke. You've spent all my money!

How will we buy the tickets?

Tad, Tad, Tad, don't be so materialistic.

We don't need money to travel.

Oh! Ouch! Get your foot out of my face!

It's not my foot!

It's my chicken!

You brought your rubber chicken?

He's got a name, okay? It's Chicken.

He might come in handy.

Did you just bite me?

I was just testing the Dracula thing.

Holly cow!

My goodness!

Who could have done something like this?

I speak 15 languages

and I still can't find the words to describe this havoc.

I was cleaning the dust brush with the brush-cleaning one,

when all of a sudden... boom!

Don't worry, we'll find out who did this.

HQ, this is Agent Ramirez.

Check the security tape for me, would you?

The only thing I need to check here is my cholesterol.

Erm, sorry... Who are you?

CIA Special Agent, Sam Pickle. I am in charge of the operation.

-And you? -Guadalupe Ramirez.

Mexican Intelligence Service. And I am in charge of this.

Wait... This is a bowling club card.

So what? You don't like bowling?

Hate everything American, is that it?

Uh, Mexico is America too.

Yeah, right. And Chile too... Come on.

Hey! That's my badge. Give it back.

You have your own.

Negative. It fell in the toilet.

Belzoni?

Your bosses gave me authority here, give me the badge and...

Ha! Just as I suspected.

We're dealing with an eight-year-old.

Dear goodness...

Excuse me.

Do you know who this belongs to?

I absolutely do.

Hey, Tangerine! Get in the car!

You! What happened to Tad?

I know where he is. Hurry.

And don't call me "Tangerine".

I knew it.

This is all your fault.

I wasn't expecting Tad to open the sarcophagus.

I just encouraged him to persuade you.

Where's Tad?

Tzz-tzz, take me to your leader.

Agent Pickle, check this out.

This account was created from that Tad guy's apartment.

Hey, what's up, Mummy fans!

We're going on an expedition to the Louvre museum!

See you later, alligator!

He's wearing a costume so we don't identify him.

Professionals...

Tad's in Paris?

Looking for the Emerald Tablet. We could look for it too,

like the old days!

"Sara and Victoria, investigators of history."

That was before you swapped archaeology

for spirits and ghosts.

Sara, I know we have different views of the world...

That's enough, Victoria.

You! Stop the car!

Sara, wait. Where are you going?

To look for Tad.

I'm going to Paris.

So, the Louvre, huh?

Ramirez, pack your bags.

We're going to Rome.

Paris.

Paris. That's what I said.

Come on, cheer up, buddy.

We'll be in croissant-country in no time.

You're not nervous, are you? Because I am! Oh no...

What? Are you transforming again?

Worse. Nerves make me gassy.

Wow. So you can buy mummies online now, huh?

You can get anything online.

Like this cup, stirs cafe' au Iait by itself.

Stop it!

I couldn't stand that anymore!

I can't believe it!

We're in Paris! It's beautiful.

Okay, come on. No time to lose.

The office should be underneath the Egyptian wing.

Woah, hold your horses.

We're in the Louvre, okay?

What do people do when they go in the Louvre?

Oh, boy. That look!

Is it happy? Sad...?

Happy...?

Okay, fine. You've seen it now. Lend me your phone.

Hmm...

Come on... Where are you? Where are you!?

There must be some trace of an old office somewhere.

Tad.

It's been three minutes without my phone.

Give it back to me! I think I'm getting the shakes.

Come on, help me. We have to move this statue.

Look... are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Sure I am. I wish we had Wi-Fi.

No, I mean the pulley!

We can use it to access the entrance!

We'd have to take some measurements,

calculate the force of the lever...

No time for that, my friend.

Let's... do it... faster!

No, Mummy, Stop!

Boom! Now that's what I call teamwork.

Cheese!

Oops!

You had to break an ornamental pedestal?

Well, it's open, right?

It's pitch black in here.

I'm going to trip over my own feet.

Wait...

There's something here.

Yes, yes, yes!

This is it! Dominique's office!

The engraving has to be here somewhere.

This place is huge!

Not like your apartment, I'm clean out of closet space.

Help me look, come on!

I'm really good at that.

Hmm...

Wow!

The mummy from this sarcophagus must have been a high ruler.

Oh! I'm going to take a selfie.

That should get me a million likes.

Huh?

Tad! There's a mummy, it's alive!

That's impossible! I swear it was there.

It opened its eyes, shouting: "I'm going to kill you!"

Okay, it didn't shout. But it was right there!

Silence, mortals!

Bow down before your Pharaoh!

Queen of the Eighteenth Dynasty!

Adviser to Queen Nefertiti!

Aunt to Tutankhamen!

I am...

Ra Amon Ah!

Ramona?

What? No, no, no, no. Ra Amon Ah.

Wait, let me do it again.

Your Pharaoh... Eighteenth Dynasty...

Aunt to Tutankhamen...

Ra Amon Ah!

She just said Ramona, right?

Sure did, Ramona.

No, no... It's got pauses in it.

Wait! You're dead.

Absolutely. I'm a mummy!

Don't make me laugh.

Sure I am! An lncan mummy from Paititi.

Even my name is Mummy. Enchanté.

Mummies are only Egyptian.

You're just a sack of rotting bones

and rancid bandages.

Thanks! I get that a lot.

What are you doing here? And how come you're alive?

Five centuries ago,

a goat herder who was passing through my tomb

choked on a piece of date kernel

and inadvertently uttered a spell

that brought me back to life.

Years later, a French archaeologist discovered me

and left me locked up in here for my own safety... he said.

I feel you, sister.

This guy shut me in for over two months!

Two hundred years for me.

-You win. -Hang on.

What French archaeologist? Was it Dominique?

Yes, but I'm sorry to tell you he died centuries ago.

We're looking for an engraving he left hidden here.

Could you lend us a hand?

Lend you a hand?

What part of "Pharaoh" did you not understand?

Huh?

God Horus! Forgive me, my lord.

I am not worthy of your beneficent presence.

Oh!

Oh!

Exactly!

This is indeed Horus himself!

Oh, what's that you say, Horus?

Oh! He orders you to help us.

You must do everything we say.

He's nothing but a flying mutt.

My soldiers would have given you fifty lashes for that charade.

Oh, how I do miss them!

Lash yourselves, then!

I'm so sorry.

It's just that my friends are under a curse.

-If you could help... -Forget it.

It's my bath time in rat's milk.

I would prefer donkey bile, but one must make sacrifices.

Please! Without the engraving,

we won't find the Emerald Tablet.

The Emerald Tablet? Are you an archaeologist?

Tad Stones, this is the police! Don't move!

Hey! I'm running this!

Tad Stones, this is the police! Don't move!

Are you an archaeologist, yes or no?

He's the best archaeologist in the world!

He found me!

Stones!

Wait there!

Here! Dominique built a way out. Hurry!

Great! Quick! Let's go!

Hold on a minute!

I'm not going without my tub.

What?

Stones!

Okay! Everyone in the tub!

Woooah!

Okay, plebians! Now take me out of here.

Don't let them escape!

Stones!

Better hurry, darling.

He's mine!

He's mine!

He's mine!

He's not mine.

They're escaping down the river in a... motorized bathtub?

We need backup!

I think we've lost them.

You mean them?

Put your foot down, Tad! I'm too young for prison!

Nobody's going to prison!

Could you please look ahead, plebs!

Stop the tub! Immediately!

Tad!

Historic moment in the final stage!

At last a Frenchman is set to win the Tour

after nearly 40 years!

Come on, Jean Paul! The Tour is yours!

The Tour is yo...

Non, mais non, non...

Who's this guy?

Mon Tour, mon Tour!

It is an honor to re-inaugurate

this symbol of Paris and France herself.

Ahhh!

At last!

I think we've lost them.

Well, well, Mr. Stones. We meet again.

No, not that guy again!

Throwing down the gauntlet, are we?

Driver, step on it!

We can't get by them.

We must go back.

Huh?

Don't worry, Ramirez. He'll turn first.

What? Are you loco? We're going to crash!

Trust me. I know what I'm doing.

Exactly what I'm doing.

Oh, I've never been more sure of anything!

(SIGHS) Good job, Pickle.

I've got him exactly where I wanted him.

(SIGHS) I think he likes us.

Sorry. Maybe next year!

Did I say I miss my soldiers?

Wait! What about the tablet? We have to find it!

Don't worry, I know how to get it.

I'll help you if you do me a favor.

Sure. Anything!

You're an archaeologist.

Well, make me famous.

Make sure my name goes down in all the history books.

Exhibit me in a museum

and I'll take you to the tablet. Deal?

Deal.

Welcome to the team, buddy.

Team?

Let's be clear about this, darling.

I am a Pharaoh, and you're my paltry servants.

-Eeeerm... -Perfect!

Dominique found a map that leads to the tablet.

A map? Cool!

It's not that easy.

To reveal that map,

we need a key that's hidden in the cataracts of the Nile.

Egypt? With the police all over our trail...

They don't know where we're headed.

We've got the element of surprise.

You heard it here first, Mummy fans.

Next stop: cataracts of the Nile!

Let me introduce my team!

We'll give you all the deets of the trip soon.

And... uploaded.

It's exhausting

always having to put on a happy face for the stories.

What have you done?

I'm just feeding the instazamers!

Oh, a new follower.

"Agent Ramirez". Mexican! I'll follow her back.

Nooo!

They'll be waiting for us now!

Ah! My selfies...

Ah!

Oh! The curse turns him into an Ammyt?

What?

Head of a crocodile,

body of a leopard, backside of a hippo.

A typical underworld creature.

Oh no!

No, Mummy, Mummy, wait... stop!

Stop! Stop!

Yep. It's an Ammyt. Be careful, they bite.

Mu.. Mummy?

He can't hear you, he's an Ammyt now.

So, what do we do?

Ammyts like to be entertained,

but don't put your head in his mouth.

Why would I put my head in his mouth?

Well, it's not what you want.

It's what he wants.

Ammyts love playing with heads.

What?

Come on, darling. He's coming.

But how do I entertain an Ammyt?

Just do anything!

Entertain him? Entertain him? Dancing?

Dancing is entertainment

What the...?

Oh! yeah!

What are you...?

He's going to eat me! He's going to eat me!

Where's he chicken? Where's the little chicken?

That's my boy. Oh, good boy!

Fetch!

Monsters of the underworld.

They're just like puppies.

He's turning back into Mummy.

At least most of him.

What just happened?

Huh?

I don't usually meddle in such plebian matters,

but these curses get permanent if you don't cure them soon.

You should get a move on finding that tablet...

Tad Stones strikes again.

First Chicago, now Paris...

French police join the hunt

for the dangerous criminal known as Tad Stones...

Vampires, zombies, extraterrestrials...

Do they live among us?

Some people just want

to see the world burn.

Pickle, you should see this.

Oh, I want to nab that Stones so bad

and use the death touch on him.

Listen, they're headed for the cataracts of the Nile.

-We should notify... -The death touch, Ramirez,

is the first thing they teach you at the CIA.

A pinch direct to a vital organ

and the enemy drops unconscious.

Would you listen to me?

And you can't eat in here!

Oh, really?

Solved.

This is humiliating.

A Pharaoh travelling with such commoners.

It's so exciting!

We're going to the land of the mummies.

I'll feel right at home.

For the fifth time: you are not a mummy!

With that tail, you look more like a crocodile of the Nile.

Awesome!

Come on, Tad.

What were you looking for here?

This symbol...

It's the seal of Hermes.

What are you doing here?

I wasn't going to leave my best friend alone in this.

Otto!

Napoleon ordered

all traces of the tablet be destroyed,

but Dominique kept an engraving

and I'm sure it's here,

in this office.

Why is Tad looking for the tablet?

The sarcophagus he opened was protected by a curse.

-The tablet can break it. -Tad's cursed?

If we follow the tablet, we'll find him.

I just want to help you.

A location in the desert, in Egypt.

That's it! The tablet is there!

-That's where Tad is heading! -He didn't find this clue...

He found this office.

I'm sure he must have discovered another way of getting there.

I think we're going to need some help with these hieroglyphics.

I think you know who to call.

Guys... We're going to Egypt.

And, for your information,

Incas also have mummies.

I guess you're not one of them.

Mummies, don't start again.

This stuck-up old broad is making me nervous.

And when I get nervous... I... I... Oh no...

I...

No, no...

Please, fasten your seatbelts.

We're experiencing some turbulence.

You know, um...

I've been thinking about it, and...

I can't bring to mind any "Pharaoh Ramona".

That's because it's Ra-Amon-Ah!

And nobody remembers me, I only reigned for three days.

Why, what happened?

Well, you know.

Your typical jealous cousin who puts a scorpion in your bed

so he can steal your throne.

And nobody wrote your name in the history books?

Just a line in an interminable list of Pharaohs.

I was destined to be the greatest Pharaoh

of all time...

But I ended up doomed to oblivion.

I know how you feel.

What would you know, plebian?

Get ready.

We're getting close now.

OMG! That's lit!

So where's the key buried?

The key isn't buried.

It's in the cave behind the waterfall.

Don't worry, buddy. We'll find it in no time.

No... You stay here, okay? You've done enough already.

Life's such a drag without your cell phone...

What?

Well, Sara, Freaktoria...

According to the symbols, this is the place.

We did it, Tangerine.

Hey-

Are you sure this is a key?

Tad Stones! Don't move!

Come on...

Look, this has been a big misunderstanding!

I'm innocent!

We know. Don't worry.

Come with us and we'll clear everything up.

He's taken the bait.

That crook is going to rot in jail.

Your megaphone is still on.

What...?

What do you mean, my megaphone...? Mother of...!

Open fire!

No! Take cover!

Don't shoot!

Hold your fire! We just want to detain him.

Tad, come out and I promise you a fair trial!

Fair, my backside!

He destroyed the Mona Lisa!

Wha... What did you do to the Mona Lisa?

I fixed it.

All that ambiguity was unbearable.

You destroyed

the most important piece of art in history?

Ahh...

I'm sick of this!

This is all your fault!

If you'd stayed at home, none of this would've happened!

But... we're a team.

We're not a team!

You're only here

because I have to break that curse and cure you!

If it wasn't for you,

I'd be on a real expedition looking for the tablet!

You're just a burden!

Now you've done it.

Now what's going on?

What the...?

No, no...

Not now!

Yes, now!

He's our ticket out of here. Hurry!

-What the hell was that? -lt's an alien, the flying kind.

No-one has discovered alien life.

That's what they want you to think.

How do you stop this thing?

It's not an elephant, you can't stop it!

Come on, guys, let's hit these babies.

I'm not sure about this. There's no sign of Tad here.

The fragment shines like never before.

It has to be here, Tangerine, I can feel it!

Sorry, wrong chakra.

We're losing altitude!

I don't get it. Why didn't Sara tell us

Victoria was on the expedition?

Because we wouldn't be here! She's completely nuts.

If we find the tablet, let's keep it away from her

or she'll invoke a freak spirit to kick our butts.

Victoria found the clue that brought us here.

Show a bit more respect.

Sara, you know we'd do anything for a decent discovery,

but we don't trust her.

This is going to be a waste of time.

I know I'm right.

The tablet is in there, right, Tangerine?

We'll know when we see what's behind that rock.

So, where's the tablet?

As I said: it's all a waste of time.

No... i don't understand it!

It's the place that Dominique said! There must be something here.

That's what happens when you listen to someone

who thinks she can have

a chat with Christopher Columbus.

Nothing.

Perfect, thanks for nothing.

No, no, no, no... This can't be right.

No, no! Slower!

We're going to crash!

Hold on!

I am never flying again.

Everyone okay?

I've had better days, but also worse ones.

All of them with you.

Where's Mummy?

Mummy! Mummy, Mummy... Are you okay?

What happened?

My legs! My beautiful dancer's legs!

Don't worry, Beljeff. You'll get your body back soon.

Come on, Mummy, there's no time to...

Mummy?

I'm leaving!

I don't want to be a "burden" on anyone.

No! I'm going to look for the tablet myself.

Wait, wait! Hold on!

I didn't mean what I said before, really, i...

Hey! Where do you think you're going?

We had a deal!

Darling, I don't think you can hold up your end of the bargain.

No, no! You can't leave us stranded here.

We don't even know how to use this!

As Osiris said to Horus: "if you see me, don't say hi".

Do it for Mummy, please.

We're near.

How is that possible? They're all here together!

That's where the prism will reveal the map.

The monster brought us where we have to use the prism?

This can't be a coincidence.

Ah, so I'm a monster now?

No, not "shhhh".

The tablet wants to be found, darling.

It will manipulate anyone to do just that.

I need to enter that cave.

Oh, really? And how do you intend to do that?

Those guys hate you.

They hate you too. How many lashes are you owed?

They'll call the cops when they lay eyes on you.

Just listen!

We need to distract them to get in that cave.

I've got an idea, but we need to work as a team.

Oh, so we're a team now?

Well, I can't. I'm not feeling good.

I have a cough.

You get to go in disguise...

Go on...

Count me out, it's not for me, darling.

They're the most prestigious archaeologists in the world.

How will they react when they set eyes on the Lost Pharaoh?

Go on...

The most important thing: no matter what happens,

don't let anyone see you move.

Come on, come on!

There's got to be something we're missing.

Okay, guys. We're leaving.

I'll make sure the whole world knows you're a fraud.

Guys, did anyone order pizza?

Hello, friends. How are you all?

I am a desert bed bug.

Bedouin.

Erm... Bedouin!

I have been wandering many miles

accompanied only by my parrot.

My dog.

Oh, you're archaeologists.

What an unexpected coincidence.

Perhaps you may be interested in my great find.

The queen of the Eighteenth Dynasty,

adviser to Queen Nefertiti

and to Tutankhamen.

Ra-Amon-Ah!

Ramona?

No, no, no, no... Ramona only to her closest friends.

It's Ra-Amon-Ah. It's got pauses in it.

Hmm... What do we have here?

Looks like the seal of the Eighteenth Dynasty.

-Yeah. —Mind-blowing.

Look at the ornaments!

Tad?

Sara! What are you doing here?

I've been looking across half the world for you!

Are you okay? Did the curse infect you?

No, it's not me, Sara.

But the curse hit Mummy and Beljeff.

-Beljeff? -Erm... It's a long story.

-With this prism, we can find... -...the Emerald Tablet.

It's a key!

Sara, the map!

There's the Emerald Tablet!

In the Great Pyramid?

Underneath it. Keops built it to cover it.

The pyramid isn't a tomb. It's... a slab.

Tad, this is an amazing discovery.

It's your discovery.

You're right.

This is my discovery.

Tad...

And if you take this Jewel of the Nile,

I will gladly throw in a lightsaber.

Hey!

What's up, guys?

What are...?

What are you doing here, stranger I do not know at all?

Anyone here looking for the Emerald Tablet?

Oh!

You've got some nerve showing up here, buddy.

-Call the cops! -Yup...

No, guys, wait!

How do you call the cops here? Is it 911?

What? No, that's in the US.

Guys! I found the map. The tablet is real!

But... What are you doing?

Hey, who on earth are you?

Huh?

What's that? Gross!

Hey, show some respect, you little brat!

Who are you calling a brat?

I've got it. Hello? Police? We have Tad, the terrorist.

-I'm a cursed 500-year-old mummy. -So gross!

-Respect your elders. -Stop it!

Tad's telling the truth.

Get in and see for yourselves.

-It's true. -The map...

Can we get it now? Something's wrong.

Let's move, guys. We need to get the tablet.

You're not going anywhere, Stones.

You're still a danger to archaeology.

The police are on their way.

We need to cure my friend.

I'm afraid this is the end of the journey for all of you.

What?

Your friend will be the first being of the new world

that I shall rule once I have the Emerald Tablet.

Okay, that's it, Freaktoria.

I shall fill the cities with spirits,

fantastical creatures, spells...

And then all of you shall be the freaks!

-Victoria! -lt's not her, Sara.

-The tablet has possessed her! -What?

The piece on the diary!

Nobody will ever laugh at Victoria Moon!

Don't let them escape!

No, no, no!

He'll me!

Oh, what I wouldn't give for some scarab beetle hummus.

Ensure they don't get away.

He'll me!

Come on, guys! Brushes, quick!

Brush for dust. Brush for sand.

Brush for rocks.

Enough with the brushes! Move the rocks!

-Okay, okay. -He's so bossy...

Hurry! We're nearly there!

Don't move, Tad.

It's dark, oh, it's so dark...

Please, be careful with him.

Well, well, the gang are all here.

This is a big mistake...

Robbing mummies from the Egyptian government, huh?

Checkmate, Mr. Stones.

Or should I say "Alien Stones"?

Please, just listen to me.

You thought you'd get away with it,

but you forgot my superior intelligence.

And an anonymous phone call from this guy tipping you off.

That, too.

That was us!

Listen, a crazy lady's going to cause the end of the world!

Silence! Or I'll give you all the death touch.

Take that mummy to the museum in Athens.

-Cairo. -That's what I said.

And the rest, lock them all up!

Including that guy in the disguise.

Not this one, he looks nice.

Okay, let's get moving.

They can't arrest us now, Sara.

Don't do anything now, Tad. Not until we can explain it all.

Mummy doesn't have that much time left.

Tad!

You have to release us! The end of the world is nigh!

-Mummy! Let him go! -Get back over here

Mummy, I'm going to save you, you hear me?

I'm going to save you! No, please!

I have to save my friend!

Mummy!

What is it, darling?

Haven't you ever seen a living mummy before?

You're Ra-Amon-Ah.

Queen of the Eighteenth Dynasty!

I can't breathe.

Sorry.

My head.

Tad, are you okay?

Yeah...

What about Mummy?

He's getting worse and worse.

We must get out of here and find the tablet before it's too late.

No.

Go without me.

What?

I'm not just a danger to archaeology.

I'm a danger to everyone around me.

That's not true...

If I wasn't obsessed with showing

what a great archaeologist I am,

we wouldn't even be in this mess.

I'm only good for getting people in trouble.

It's better I stay locked up in here.

You...

You're...

You're... the best...

archaeologist...

in the world.

You found me.

Mummy...

Please, forgive me.

Tad... I already did.

Not for that.

For this.

We have to turn back!

She's going to invoke a monster to kick our butts...

This sounds very weird, we should interrogate them.

They're trained to twist your mind.

Don't buy all that.

...what the...

Hold on, Mummy.

Quick, Tad!

Get in. There's no time!

They're going to give me my very own room

in the museum at Cairo.

What? You can't leave us now.

I've been waiting 3,000 years for this moment.

You know how much this means.

Quickly, you have to cure Mummy!

Remember: Don't let anyone see you move.

Best of luck, Ra-Amon-Ah.

"Victoria is nuts. She's nothing but a freak..."

Well, this freak is going to teach them a lesson.

They'll give me the respect I deserve!

Ramona said the tablet wants to be found.

It's using Victoria to come back to life.

-Where did she go? -There!

Look!

Woah!

Woooah!

Yes! Yes!

Fight it, Victoria.

The tablet has got inside you...

I will not let you take it from me!

No, no, no. Wait!

It's mine!

Victoria!

We did it.

Let's move on.

I feel my stomach's all tangled up with my lungs.

That's not good, right?

We should nearly be there by now.

This doesn't seem too...

...big.

How will we find the tablet?

It's there.

Oh, I see a bright light.

Game over.

-Look after Antonio for me. -Hold on, buddy.

Tad, there.

-The altar. -Finally, Mummy.

Yaaay!

It's not here.

Looking for something?

This tablet was last used four thousand years ago.

Today, at long last, it's free once more.

Victoria!

Oh, that's very cool!

Come forth into the light, beings from the underworld!

Please, we need to cure our friend.

He's not your friend anymore.

Complete your transformation!

Mummy!

Finish them!

Buddy. Buddy!

It's me, Tad!

Your favorite archaeologist!

Huh?

He's out of control! What do we do?

We can't help him without the tablet.

Come to me,

monsters of the underworld.

Ah!

Aaah!

What's up, plebians?

Ramona!

Here, doggy! Look what I've got!

Come here, big guy! Fetch!

No, not me! The chicken!

Quick, Ramona. Run!

She won't make it.

Help me, Sara!

No!

-Victoria! -What happened?

Beljeff, no!

Easy now, boy... Easy, easy...

Now he's going to eat me. Now he's going to...

What...?

No!

Mummy!

No!

Yes, we're just coming in now.

It's just that Tad took two hours getting ready.

Sorry, I thought it was black tie.

Relax.

Today is your day. You should just enjoy it.

Hey! Who's this fine gentleman?

Come on, don't be silly. ls Sara here yet?

-Come on, we're up. -See you out there, buddy.

A very warm welcome to the rest of the team.

Breath, Tad.

This time you've actually done it.

For the whole world to see.

My friends, this discovery

will change the course of archaeology forever.

The fact that we are here today

is all down to someone who never lost hope.

I might even say

he's the best archaeologist I know.

That is why I want you all to give a big round of applause

to the newest member of our team... Dr. Tad Stones!

You did it, man!

I, erm...

Tad, are you okay?

Guys... where's Sara? And Ramona?

Don't worry about that now. You're with us, buddy.

Where's... Mummy?

Mummy?

Tad, Mummy fell into the abyss.

He's... gone.

This isn't right.

This isn't right.

This isn't right.

This isn't right. This isn't right.

This isn't right. This isn't right!

But why isn't he doing anything?

The tablet poisons your deepest desires.

It's taking hold of him.

Fight, Tad.

Get out of my head!

Oh, hey buddy!

Hey, friend.

Oh, Jeff, pal! You're cured!

Let's get out of here.

We've got to run, right?

Yup.

Cool! Hey, look!

Quick, somebody get a photo! Come on!

This one's going be a huge hit with my instazamers!

Okay, okay. I get it. I'll stop it now.

What?

Sara... i don't know how to apologize.

I didn't...

Oh, howl miss my soldiers.

They all worshipped me whenever I wanted.

Stones!

Halt! Get the cuffs out!

Take me, but please leave my friends.

They're innocent.

Not a word, Stones. You're under arre...

Free. You're free to go.

-What? -What?

Your colleagues explained it all.

The sarcophagus, the curse, the mummies...

Where's the tablet?

Destroyed.

Perfect. That object was far too dangerous.

Promise me you'll never breathe a word of this.

I promise.

No way!

I'm in charge, and that man is an international terrorist!

Tad Stones! You are under arrest

in the name of the government...

Death touch. Never fails.

Hey, Stones!

We still have to find the Treasure of King Pakal.

What do you say? Are you in?

Yeah! Come on, buddy.

Thanks, guys, but I've got plans with my team.

Look after them.

They're a great team.

I don't get why you didn't stay.

It was your opportunity to be showcased in a museum.

I know, darling; it's where a goddess like me should be.

But who wants to be locked up again?

Now, I want to see the world.

Yeah! That's my Ramona!

I can't believe my eyes! Two living mummies!

You say mummy... he's nothing but a sack of bones.

And rancid bandages, I know, I know...

But the most distinguished sack of bones

I have ever laid eyes on.

The Inca and Egyptian culture

together after thousands of years.

You should be proud of yourselves.

But the big lesson about this adventure

isn't who we are, it's who we've shared it with,

and I've shared it with my best friend in the world,

my buddy, my colleague, my bro, my pal...

Okay, okay... Thanks, Mummy. We get the idea.

What would I do without you, Chicken? Right, buddy?

Huh?

Chicken!

No, no, no,

Eh?

THE END