All language subtitles for VEED-subtitles_Apple Tree Yard (2017) S1E1

Civilised.

Now, I don't even know
what that means.

Food, shelter, sex -

once those needs are covered,
we can pretend we're in control.

That the lives we build
keep us human.

But, really, we're all just animals.

You know how I know that?

Fear.

Fear for your life.

Once you've felt that,

everything else -

all this so-called civilisation...

it's a dream.

You've taught me that, my love.

Would the defendant please stand?

'Fear makes animals of us all.'

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In terms of our research,
we're pushing at frontiers

and there are bound to be anxieties
around that - I do understand.

But, to be frank, most of those
anxieties are completely unfounded.

So everything we're hearing
about Frankenfoods...?

They're still foods and how
they're processed and regulated,

that's crucial, obviously.

But that's a question for Government
or business, not science.

Listen, the more we learn about DNA,

the more avenues there are
for gene therapy,

which could lead to the eradication

of genetically-based illness

and that has to be
a tremendous positive.

But you can reassure us, professor,

no ten-foot mice on the cards,

or triangular cows?

The work we're doing is never going
to result in corn with udders.

Hi, it's me. Just to say they're
done with me, so you don't need

to be home in time for the
Tesco delivery...

Um, that's it.

And I'll cook, by the way.
See ya.

We won't be seeing you this
afternoon, then,

Professor Carmichael?

No. David moved up the technology
questions

so that I'd be finished by
lunchtime..

Efficiency in the civil service -

there's a novelty.

Hi. Anything else?

No, that's it, thank you.

You were very articulate in there,
professor. Thanks.

The first time I've ever
understood what a genome is.

Good! Um, well, I do...
I do a lot of lecturing,

but it's not professor, actually.

That's more American, is it?
Exactly, yes.

I get that because of the
mad scientist thing.

You know, Nutty Professor.

Right, well, I can see, obviously,
you're deranged.

So have you appeared in front

of the Select Committee before?

A couple of times, actually, yes.

Governments get really het up
about genetics,

whichever lot are in,
you know, modification, cloning.

Do you get nervous, speaking in front
of a group of people like that?

I only say that because you didn't
seem it at all.

Didn't I? No, not at all. Um...
Thanks, Nick.

No, I suppose I don't, really.

Well, not in front of MPs anyway.

I think I know more about it than
they do. Right. Yeah, well,

you know, that's a relief cos
I'd be worried to think

that MPs set themselves up
as experts on anything.

Are you allowed to say that in here?

Off the record you are, yeah.
Yeah.

Well, all right.

That's me...

have you seen the
Chapel in the Crypt?

No.

Wait one second.

Sorted.

Just remind me to give those back
to Martha afterwards

cos my life will not be worth
living, even if you are a VIP.

SO are you OK for time?

Yeah, sure. Sure?

This way.

It's strictly by-appointment
and Members can use it -

they have christenings.
You can even get married here.

It's a Royal Peculiar.

It means it's under the monarch's
control via the Lord Chamberlain

and that's Great Lord Chamberlain
to you.

Apparently, Oliver Cromwell
stabled his horses here.

I don't know if that's true.

I'm sorry.

It's obviously not top of the
cleaning rota. Thank you.

This isn't the best bit.

Come here. Come on.

You've come this far.

You're going to have to go first
because it's a bit tight in there.

It used to be a broom cupboard.

What am I looking for?

It's on the back of the door.
Can you see it?

The suffragette, you know?

Yeah. Um, I know who she is -
Derby Day.

Yeah. She slipped in here
on the night

of the census of 1911,
I think it was.

It was before she, you know,
jumped in front of the horse,

obviously caused a lot of trouble.

"In this broom cupboard Emily
Wilding Davison"

"hid herself illegally"

"during the night of the
1911 census."

"In this way she was able to record
her address"

"on the night of the census as
being..."

"the House of Commons."

I knew you'd be interested.

I've never done anything
like that before.

Hey.

Hi.

Sorry, I forgot to get back...
It's OK, it's OK.

The girl at the counter said the
own-brand stuff

is exactly the same, unsurprisingly.

You still suffering?

The chilli might help.

Yeah, if I can taste it.

Not bad.

Did you get a chance to talk to
Rosa? How did it go?

The Standing Committee?

Select Committee. Um, fine, yeah.

Rosa wasn't in today.

Shall I set the table?

I've done it.

So, according to Martin,

it's a thing now, so no going back.

Every birthday?

As if secret sodding Santa
wasn't bad enough.

It's good, love. Tasty.

'..But the only person I can talk to
about you is you.

'What we did today
is without doubt...

'I know nothing about you.

'Sex with you is like being
eaten by a wolf.

'Will you even give
me a second thought,

'or is this just something you do?'

FYI, all the candidates
and the specs we put up.

Saves you printing out the e-mails.

You're a star. Thank you.

Um, Liz, about Kat's
maternity cover...

I'm really sorry,
I just can't face it.

The thought of doing that commute
again every day makes me

want to bang my head against a wall.

Even for six months?

It's really why I went part-time.
It's OK.

Kat practically told us at the
moment of conception.

We'll find someone.

Um, it's black silk

with a red and orange pattern in it.

And when was it you were in, madam?
Tuesday.

Tuesday. One moment, please.

Sorry, madam. No scarves at all.

Well, it was worth a try.
Indeed. Thank you.

You're welcome.

So...

are you sure that you weren't
just hanging out here

on the off-chance that we'd
bump into each other?

Naturally.

No, I...
I work at the Beaufort Institute.

Classy. You've heard of it?

Well, yeah, of course.

It crops up in the news all the
time, doesn't it?

Whenever there's something about
genes or genomes or DNA,

which, thanks to you, I now know
aren't all the same thing.

Sorry.

What is it you do exactly?

Well, you know, it's civil service.

All very boring.

You don't look like a civil servant.

You don't look like a scientist.

You're married.

So am I.

Shall we just skip all that?

I assume neither of us is looking
for a parachute.

No.

Absolutely not.

I would love it if my daughter
wanted to be a scientist,

it's just that, at the moment, that
would depend on lab coats coming

in totally artificial fibre, being
really shiny, and preferably pink.

Carrie, my daughter, was always
completely set on it.

Tunnel vision like me, I suppose.

My niece is doing triple science

at A level - maybe you could
give her a pep talk?

Um...

isn't this all a bit...

back to front, maybe,
don't you think?

Shoot first, ask questions later.

Yvonne!

Come on, drink.

So how's Gary?

Me first.
How are things with you and Chris?

It's nothing to worry about.

It's... just... you know,

he's stopped making
as much of an effort,

we're not tearing each other's
clothes off anymore.

That's not sounding good, Suze.

It's fine.

It's very... civilised.

Anyway, I thought you'd
be pleased...

Captain Sensible.

God, is that what I am?

Always.

Is everything OK?

How is Gary?

Yeah, he's fine. Um...

sends his love.

You know, it's not that girl,
is it? Rosa?

I told him to talk to the dean
to make sure it was official.

I know it's all in her head,

but you need backup these days.

You're sure it was, then?

No, it's just Gary's still an
attractive man.

I know you two are rock solid...

Hey, always his greatest fan.

No, I think we're out of the
woods on that one.

20 years ago, maybe.

The students were queueing up -
he used to get so embarrassed.

"Still attractive".

Do you think
that's what they say about us?

What is going on with you?

Must be my age.

Why was that...? Why's that funny?

It's like, what age are you, 100?

Let's change the subject now.
I'm getting you drunk.

Go for it.

Hi, erm,

I think...

Let's not.

I mean, it was really, really...

what it was, but too many people
can get hurt.

God, the cliches, but it's true.

So...

that's it.

Yeah.

Take care.

No!

Fuck!

Shit!

Bloody hell!

Has she cut herself?

It's Rosa.

What?!

Sorry. Come on, Rosa.
What the hell are you doing?

Careful, careful!

No! Leave the bloody bottles!

God.

Sorry, I'm... I'm a bit... bit
pissed.

Clearly. I just...

My friend, Mel, she lives just down
the road.

She was having a crisis, a thing,
and I just thought...

You know, it's the...

it's your road.

I'm sorry. It's all right. Sorry.

Jeez!
What have you done to yourself?

Keep it up, keep it up. Come on.

There we are.

Straight through.

I think she needs stitches.

Thank you.

I'll get it looked at.

Come on.

I'm sorry.

Mind your head.

Hello, come in!

Mum!

All right?

How are you doing?
I'm good. How are you?

These are lovely, Carrie, thank you.

Poor Dad! Does he ever have to work
on a Saturday?

He won't be much longer.

I think it was just some papers that
he forgot to bring back.

Can I borrow these?

Yeah, sure.

Yes, please. Thanks.

Carrie, love, do you want some?

Or there's white in the fridge if
you'd prefer? No thanks.

Have you spoken to Adam at all?

Not recently, though Dad's been in
touch on Facebook though.

Hey!

Here he is!

Bloody hell, A&E!

I'm not doing that again in a hurry.

A&E? What's wrong? Hey!

Didn't Mum say?

Hi, Sathnam.

This research assistant turned up on
our doorstep in the middle of

the night and managed to cut herself
on a broken bottle.

Mum said you were at the office.

Well, what was she doing pitching up
here in the middle of the night?

God knows! She was pissed, I think.

Did she need stitches?

A couple. All fine.

Nobody died!

Look at this! Smashing.

Smells good as well, love.

Let's get some of it through to the
table, shall we?

So, news.

Is it the Aberystwyth job?

I'm pregnant.

My God... pregnant. Pregnant!

I know, it's mad!

I should have told you when I
came in.

That's wonderful, well done.

Mum!

I'm five years older than you
were when you had me.

Yeah, and I've never pretended that
that was ideal.

Yes, you did! You said it was great.

"Got it all out of the way and was
back on the career ladder"

"before the rest of them were even
thinking of popping out a sprog."

I'm just saying that your work is
going so well.

And it'll go just as well when I'm
back from maternity leave.

Honestly, Mum,
the department's fine about it.

What if you don't want to go back?

Of course I'll want to. You did.

You know, it took me eight years to
finish my PhD.

And your dad did it in three.

And your Nana practically sang the
Hallelujah Chorus

every time he changed a nappy.

She still calls women who work
"career girls".

Yeah. Don't forget "lady doctors".

Well, Nana...

the world's moved on a bit,
hasn't it?

Yeah. Thank God.

Go to the cinema, do all the things
you won't be able to do

in nine months.

Don't tell him that! Love you.

Or ever again! I love you, too.

Thanks for everything.

Keep them as long as you like.

Love you, guys. Thanks for lunch.

Drive safely.

Bloody hell.

Granny and Grandad.

If you're sleeping with her,
you can tell me, you know.

I mean, she seems very vulnerable...

I'm not.

Von.

OK.

There was a possibility of that...

but I shut it down.

I think that's why she's so upset.

"Possibility".

That day when we got the grant,
back in the summer...

we were all celebrating...

pissed...
You said it was all in her head.

Well... largely.

So, what? You snogged her or was it
more than that...?

I'm not going to give you chapter and
verse. We're not bloody teenagers!

Nothing happened.

That's all you need to know.

Shit.

Thank you.

How's the wonderful world
of protein sequencing?

You got it right.

Of course I did.

So, what... what made you change
your mind, then?

About seeing me again?

I suppose you're irresistible.

Clearly.

There's something else going on with
you though, isn't there?

'Tell me something about your work.'

Something surprising that
everybody gets wrong.

Umm...

That we know what we're doing?

Seriously.

There's this image of science,
the clinical thing,

that we're efficient and we know
everything, but, actually,

all we can ever do is hazily grasp
but a fraction of what it is

we're trying to pin down...

like the genome.

Your typical haploid human genome...

Sorry, haploid, what's that again?

Your basic genome.

It has three billion DNA base
pairs...

of which less than 2% code
for proteins.

So, the rest of the DNA, 98%,

we don't really know what it's
there for.

Could be useful or could be just
biochemical rubbish.

And what I do? I'm just scrabbling
about in the dirt,

trying to look for the good stuff.

"We'll never conquer space."

It's an Arthur C Clarke thing.

Well, basically, when everyone was
getting all excited over the

moon landings, he said, "Don't
worry, whatever we discover",

"the universe is far too big and too
random for us ever to know it properly."

"We'll never conquer space."

'Life's mysterious,

'which is a good thing.'

Isn't it?

What are we doing?

You're beautiful.

No. You, you were carrying
that, actually.

Well, no, I mean, if someone
happened to see us

coming downstairs together,
they might wonder why

you're dressed differently coming
out.

'Am I in over my head with you?'

Remind me what it is you do again?

I told you, didn't I?

Crown Estate.

Oiling the wheels.

'Who are you?

'I couldn't say.

'Although I have noticed

'secrets are the air you breathe.'

'I've got you a present.'

You didn't go for the
cheapest option.

Well, why would you have
a cheap phone in your bag?

'It just sort of shouts "affair",
doesn't it?'

'It's a pay-as-you-go.

'Obviously, you don't link it to
your e-mail account.

'And don't top it up at the
same place twice, right,

'cos it's important not to
establish a pattern -

'which is kind of the exact
opposite of what you do.

'If we're going to do this,

'then at least we can make
sure no-one gets hurt.'

You look well.

Do I?

Thanks.

Here you go.

I'm fine, George, thanks.

Thought you'd both be latte girls.

Am I right?

Well, that was the button I pressed.

It probably all tastes the same.

Sorry, Yvonne. I know you like
posh coffee.

As long as it's caffeine.

I like to pretend I'm classy,
but I'm really easy.

So, I'm here to talk to you about
why genome editing should have

transformed the way we treat cancer.

What is genome editing?

I don't think I need to explain that
to this room, but if you'll

bear with me for one moment.

Inserted, replaced, deleted.

Anyway Liz slices it,
these things are always a slog.

You getting the Tube?

Er, no, I've got things to do.

I'll see you tomorrow then...

When fates are decided.

Yeah. Bye, George. See ya.

I've been stalking you.

The PhD with merchant supervising,
the Beaufort...

It's my dream career.

Well, we enjoyed hearing your
presentation.

Hang on. Dr Carmichael,

whatever the outcome - and I do
totally respect that -

I'd... I'd really appreciate
the opportunity

to talk with you about
your research.

I'm very discreet.

Were you tempted?

Would I be telling you if I was?

Tin.

Recycling.

He made my skin crawl, actually.

Confident little creep.

Lots of, you know, primate
crotch display.

Well, you're the one with all
the power, love,

that's probably what it was about.

You can screw him over, so he
thought he'd do the same with you.

You know, redress the balance.

Well, he's not getting the job.

His presentation was
extremely pedestrian.

You see? You won.

Adam came by today.

Adam? Yeah, around lunchtime.

I was lucky not to miss him.

Well, why didn't you say?

It was a flying visit.

He's down for a friend's gig,
he said. Picked up a piece of kit.

A loop pedal or...

I've probably got that wrong.

Well, how was he? Fine.

Did he look well?

Ish.

He's looked worse.
Love, he was fine.

You know what he's like.

He stayed for a cup of tea and the
contents of the biscuit tin.

Did he say how long
he was going to be around?

Just for the gig, I think,
then he's back off up to Manchester.

He sends his love.

Said to give you a big kiss.

'Has anyone seen you using the
phone?'

Well, no-one I know, obviously.

'What will you tell your husband,
if he finds it,

'if he goes through your bag?'

He won't.

We're not like that.
He's not the jealous type.

It's important to imagine the
worst-case scenario.

'Well, I'll say that it belongs to
Liz from work'

and that she left it at a meeting
and I've been carrying it around,

intending to give it back.

Ooh, you're good. 'I know.'

It's worrying, isn't it?

'It is a bit.'

But he won't ask or notice.

Tell me something that winds
you up about him.

What?

'Your husband. Something that really
gets on your nerves.'

No.

'Go on.'

No! I'm not doing that.

No parachutes, do you remember?

I'm going.

- Hey.
- Hi.

'I can't plead biology.

'Sex may be an animal pleasure,

'but adultery, I'm discovering,
is a human one.'

"Is life a boon?"

"If so, it must befall that death,"

"whene'er he call,"

"must call too soon."

'It's not exactly win-win, is it?'

Life is a boon and then you die.

Or life isn't a boon,

it's just shit, and then you die.

'What do you reckon?'

'Me?

'I reckon life's a boon.'

It's all right, it's all right.
Risk assessment.

Camera...

Facing the wrong way.

Excuse me, have you got a light?

I didn't know you smoked.

I don't.

It's handy sometimes.

Er, I'm sorry. I miscalculated.

Bit near rush hour.

It's really a thing with you,
isn't it, public places?

Well, you know me well enough by
now. It's...

I can't help it.
It turns me on, it just does.

It's probably...

It's probably genetic.

Christ, do you really think that
means something?

That that absolves you of all
responsibility, just hard-wiring?

But...

Well...

OK, probably that was
a bad choice of words, but...

I'm sorry, this is ridiculous.

At our age. What kind of stupid game
are we playing, anyway?

Hey! What?

Wait, wait, wait.

I thought... I thought... I thought
you did, too.

No.

It's you, actually.

You turn me on.

It's all right. I know the deal.

I might be stupid, but I'm not
blind. Those girls earlier,

I'm sure you'd rather be screwing
them, preferably outside,

but you've got to settle for what's
on offer. My God!

Well, look at me! What? What?

You're gorgeous!

I'm middle-aged and my body looks...

I look like a bloody jelly baby!

Yvonne!

Hello?

Hello?

Adam? No. It's no-one.

'Gary's friend, Michael, he started
base jumping in his forties,

'flinging himself off cliffs.

'At least you don't do that.

'You just ask other people to.'

Von, I'm taking the charger
from the kitchen.

That's mine.

You look nice.

Yeah, it's Jonathon's leaving do.

I'll be making your apologies.

Course. That's tonight, is it?

They'll have a charger at the hotel.

Och, I told them not to
bother with the hotel,

I'm... I'm kipping at Andy's.

Right, OK.

Well, have a nice night.
Love to Jonathon.

See you Friday.

I...

Thank you very much.

Cheers.

Thanks.

I-I was just...

I was just imagining
something shorter, that's all.

Well, the rules are tits or legs,

but you can't have both.

Take your knickers off.

Who says I'm wearing any?

God, I love men.

Of course I am. A dress like this?

So... take...

Take them off now, then.

Come on. I mean, there's got to
be something in it for me,

you're going to this party.

We could have had a night
in a hotel.

Gary's away.

I know, you can't.

I love hotels.

Gary hates them.

I'm sorry.

Don't.

So?

I'll take mine... I'll take mine
off, too, if you like.

All right. But you have to put them
back on over your trousers.

Jesus Christ.

Don't talk to any strange men.

Well, it's a science faculty,

so it's going to be wall-to-wall
strange men...

and there'll be masses of drink.

OK.

So text me later.

Even if you're pissed..

Especially if you're pissed.

Risk assessment.

Hey... It's fine.
How do you know?

Intuition.

By which I mean, of course,
a combination of observation...

knowledge and experience...

otherwise known as...

gambler's edge.

Good God.

I can't.

Yeah, you can. II really can't.

No, you can. You really can.

Hey.

Where's the apple tree?

Long gone.

What time is it?

It's ten past nine. Shit.
Go. Go, go on.

Text me, OK? Send me a picture.

Hey! What?

It's a dummy camera.

How do you know?

It's not hooked up to anything.

They just put them up as
a deterrent, that's all. Seriously.

It's easy to tell the difference
if you know what to look for.

Have fun.

My God.

I'm fucking a spook.

Great. Thank you.
God, you look gorgeous.

Thank you. Hiya.
George, how are you?

- Good. Cheers.
- Cheers.

Proper champagne..

Is Jonathon really
paying for all this himself?

Well, maybe he got
one of the patrons

to put their hand in their pocket -
Peller or someone.

Doesn't that count as a bribe?
Well, not if he's retiring.

Jonathon. Hey, George, hello!

Good to see you.
Good to see you, too.

Congratulations. Thank you so much.

Nice to see you. How are you?

It's exactly like Gary to miss
a party.

Well, anyway, he's in Sunderland.

Isn't Sunderland where they have
that...?

Yep. Amazing mouse lab -
Gary raves about it.

Do send him my love, won't you?

Haven't seen him for yonks..

Signs are...

they're about to run out.

Better make hay while the
sun shines.

Absolutely.

Cheers. Cheers.

I've got it.

Dear

I'll look after it.

I'm for my bed.

Total lightweight these days.

Yeah, me, too.

Sleep well, babe. You, too.

See you on Monday. Monday!

Do you fancy splitting a cab?

That's a great idea.

You live west, don't you?

I do, I do, I do.

I just left my stuff in my office.
Won't take me a sec.

C'mon, c'mon.

Do you know what really winds
me up about Gary?

His haircut. I hate his haircut.

He's had the same haircut for
30 years

and I hated it 30 years ago.

Dearie me.

God, did I say that out loud?
I'm really sorry.

It is definitely,
definitely time for bed.

Come on, George, don't be silly.

No, no... No, no, no...

Does your husband know you're
fucking someone else?

What?

Does he?

No, get off.
Shush, shush, shush.

Get off me!

Come on!

Listen to me.

Now, you move,

even a tiny bit,

and I'll hit you again.

Do you understand me? Do you?

Yeah?

Good girl. Fucking good girl.

Please!

'Fear...

'that's what makes animals
of us all.'

Before I met you...

I was civilised.

Civilised.

So help me God.

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