Original subtitles

All aboard!

- Good morning. - Good morning.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Hi. How long to Pittsburgh?

- Ten hours to Pittsburgh. - Is there a bar car on here?

- On your left. - Thanks.

- Madam, travelling alone? - All alone.

- Shall I wake you for Pittsburgh? - No. I'm going to New York.

- The big apple. - Right.

- Thank you, and good night. - Thank you. Good night.

Please don't scream.

I just want you to go to sleep.

Please!

Please!

Son of a bitch!

Are you some sort of freak rapist asshole?

Fucker!

Son of a...

Don't scream.

Don't... don't scream.

What was in that needle?

What was in it?

Tell me. Damn it. Why won't you say something to me?

What the hell do you want?

Do you want money?

If you want money, you can have what you want. I have a lot of money.

What was in that shot you gave me?

It's all right.

I'm always very careful with the needles. It won't hurt you.

What do you mean you're always very careful?

- It won't hurt you. - What was in that shot?

- It's just to help you sleep. - Tell me what was in the shot!

- It's just to help you sleep! - Why do you want me to sleep?

Just take what you want and go.

Don't you understand? It's important to me!

I'm always very careful with the needles...

So it puts you to sleep.

And it doesn't hurt.

It's very important.

Pittsburgh!

Pittsburgh!

Where could she be? Joyce!

She's gotta be here somewhere.

Don't pound on that door. There's people sleeping in there.

We're looking for a friend of ours.

- We've been up and down this whole... - Joyce! Joyce!

You look fabulous. And your hair is longer.

Oh, god! Ok.

Denise is gonna meet us in New York.

Yeah, she's gonna be at the station when we get there.

So I spend the night alone and wake up to this?

- Another creep! - Watch your hands!

You're Martin Matthias?

I'm cuda. Come.

We must take another train.

Braddock.

Nosferatu.

Nosferatu.

Vampire.

First, I will save your soul.

Then I will destroy you.

I will show you your room.

Pamgri!

You may come and go, but you will not take people from this city.

If I hear of it, a single time, I will destroy you without salvation.

You may not enter my room.

When I wish to speak with you, I will.

My granddaughter stays with me.

You will not enter her room.

I have told her not to speak with you, but she will.

You will not answer.

Tomorrow you may rest.

Next day you work in my shop.

I have been told you are imbecile.

Can you speak?

Speak, so I can hear your voice.

Speak, nosferatu.

Nosferatu.

You will not enter my room, nosferatu. You will not enter my room!

You will not take family blood.

There isn't any magic. There isn't any magic!

It's just a sickness.

Nosferatu.

Nosferatu.

I am your cousin.

I am your cousin Martin.

You see?

You see?

You see?!

You see?

It isn't magic.

Even I know that.

It isn't magic.

Ok, ladies. I'm sorry I'm late. You know, I never miss a day.

In 43 years.

I'm sorry I was late today, ladies.

You need help here, cuda.

Well, my cousin arrived today from Indianapolis.

You'll see him here.

- He's going to help me. - Oh, isn't that nice? Is he old like you?

Old like all of us, you mean.

How long has it been since a young man moved into braddock?

Actually, he is a young man. Not even 20.

A young man in the house with Christina? Related or not, I don't think it's right.

But, mrs bellini...

You shouldn't have it, cuda. How will it look?

It looks as you want it to look, mrs bellini.

My family knows how to behave.

Uh, you must be Martin.

Is, uh... is tateh cuda home yet?

Hey. What's happening?

Oh. Hi, Martin.

On radio: I would like to know why you always take the side of the strikers.

- Uh-huh. - During a strike and...

We're having stuffed cabbage tonight. Do you like it?

Every day you have to wait for an hour and a half...

Do you like stuffed cabbage?

Well, it's tateh cuda's favourite and around here things are done his way.

What?

What?

I couldn't hear you.

Oh, I didn't know you were listening.

That's a crazy talk show.

On all night, from six to six.

I'd call him if we had a phone.

Can you believe that, no phone?

Well, tateh cuda and I had a terrible fight about it last week.

And I'm gonna have one put in my room.

As long as I pay for it.

And as long as the bell doesn't ring too loud.

- I don't want to talk about myself. - Are you a bus driver?

You're not a bus driver - you're a dj. You make your own salary.

I'm talking about bus drivers...

Say, would you like to have a phone?

I mean, an extension could only be a few dollars more.

I could make the arrangements for you,

and we could share the expenses at the end of the month.

Well...

Let me know if you want one, ok?

That's all I have to say.

Look how he eats.

Put your finger in there.

Go ahead.

Oh, I can't!

- Try it. - No, I...

I can't put my finger in there.

Wow, that's really great!

See, it has two blades - a real one and a slip blade.

You hold the real one and pull the slip blade up.

Things only seem to be magic.

There is no real magic.

There's no real magic ever.

- Hello, cuda. - Hello, Arthur.

Oh, Arthur, this is my cousin.

Arthur thelanus, Martin.

Hello, Martin. Indianapolis, huh? It's a good town.

Well, I hear there's work there.

There's work everywhere, Arthur. People just don't bother to look for it.

I'm talking about decent work.

With decent money.

Christina: Let's go over to your place, ok?

I'm tired. Let's just watch the game here. Cuda will like that.

Christina: Come on. What about me?

Arthur: I promised him. He's been bugging me for all this time.

He says, "you never spend any time around here."

I think he thinks we're off some place, you know.

What about me? You don't seem to want spend time with me any more.

We spend our lives in bed!

We do not.

That's not the way it is, and you know that.

- Just relax. - It seems like it never happens.

Can't you just relax here?

No, I can't relax here.

I'll just watch, like, the first half with him.

I'm so sick of you... this whole place, everyone here.

All you want to do is sit down and watch the games

and just let everything just pass by.

We have to get in the car, and we have to drive all the way out there.

Such a drag to go there and be alone with me.

- Oh, come on. Give me a break! - Just forget it.

Nosferatu.

Oh, you must be Martin. Just a minute, son. I'll get my purse.

Go around to the side. Go around to the side.

This is for the meat.

And this is for you, Martin.

Ok?

Well, that was quick. I didn't expect you till later this afternoon.

It's good that you caught me. I was just gonna run down to the state store.

Thank you.

I can give you a ride back downtown if you'd like.

Why not? It's such a long way.

Let's go.

This is really something.

Coming all the way up here to deliver this stuff.

Now I deliver you all the way back downtown.

I could have picked it up myself.

It's too bad you had to walk all the way up.

Have you got a minute? I need gas.

Can I help you?

Yes. A dollar's worth of regular, please.

My husband puts in all the mileage

when he's out gallivanting around with the girls,

so I'm not gonna use my money to fill up the tank for him.

I don't get enough as it is.

Yeah, I know you have to get back. It'll just be a minute.

Would you reach over there in the glove compartment

and give me the little notebook that's in there?

In the glove compartment.

There's a little notebook in there.

Thanks.

My husband's a fanatic about this.

How much gas, when, what's the mileage.

I'm s orry!

I'm the complaining old housewife.

If you don't like it, get out.

Hey, I don't mean you. I mean me!

If I'm so dissatisfied, I should just get out of it and shut up about it.

You remind me of an old cat I used to have.

I don't mean that to sound funny.

I had an old alley cat,

and he used to sit on the floor and stare up at me with those eyes.

I really used to be able to talk to that old cat,

and he'd just listen and listen till I got it all out of my system.

He never said anything either, never talked back.

Wow.

Thank you!

Say, do you do any otherjobs?

Yardwork, handywork, stuff like that?

Well, maybe we can work something out.

See you next week.

It's crazy. I can't believe this is happening.

It's a nightmare, for you and him!

Your father was not from our part of the world.

Your mother knew.

She believed.

Well, if she did, then thank god I was too little to know her.

Martin had his father until he was 32.

Grandfather, he is just a boy!

Look in the books, Christina.

We have the books of the family. Did you ever look?

Of course, the books. The books will show it.

Those damn books. They should be burned! That's where you get your horrible ideas!

Ask the boy himself. Ask Martin. He will tell you.

He's unbalanced. He's mad. And you and those books have driven him to it!

He is nosferatu.

He was born to Elena borassa and Rudy Mathias in the old country in 1892.

He is young for nosferatu.

There have been nine such accursed in the family.

There are three still alive.

Martin is one.

Count demodeli is the eldest in the family now.

From the old country, he sends the letters

telling who will take the pamgri into their house.

We obey, first for the family shame,

and again because to defy the evil ones is to bring a curse upon oneself.

I will not shame the family, but the devil... the devil can take my soul.

I would have destroyed the children the moment they showed the signs.

Elena borassa took her own life instead.

Now... Martin comes to me.

People cannot come to other people's beliefs.

It's hard for you, I know. It's hard for anyone young.

Do you believe that god's whole world runs by the laws of the few sciences

we have been able to discover?

Oh, no, Christina. There is more.

But people are satisfied.

They know so much, they think they know all.

And that makes it easy for nosferatu.

That makes it easy for all the devils.

Damn him.

Here. Let me help.

- No. It's my job. - I just want to help, all right?

No! It's my job.

Mind if I turn this off?

I'm glad you don't believe in the magic.

Well, I don't. I really don't.

I know, and I'm glad.

I'm sorry that you have to go through it all.

I know it must be awful for you.

It is. It is awful.

Tadeh cuda. Ah, he's...

As long as it doesn't get crazy. Sometimes they get crazy.

How old are you, Martin?

Oh, I'm old.

How old?

Listen... I would really like to help you.

Would you like to see a doctor?

I've seen lots of doctors. They don't know what to do either.

You shouldn't be with the family.

Maybe you should be in...

- A hospital, or a home or something. - No, that would be too hard for me.

Well, I think that this is hard for you,

and I think that if the family really wanted to help you,

that that's what they should do.

They're crazy. They're the ones that are...

I'm sorry.

Ah, it's just that...

Well, I grew up in this entire thing, too.

Nosferatu. Nosferatu. The family curse. The family shame.

It's the middle ages!

Do you know, I heard about this my entire life?

Sometimes I even start thinking that I'm gonna believe all that bullshit.

I couldn't go to a hospital.

That would be too hard for me.

I'll be fine.

I'm always fine.

Damn him.

Listen... I really want to talk to you some more about this, ok?

No, I mean I really want to talk to you,

and maybe even we can sit grandfather down and talk to him.

I'll talk to you, not to him.

All right. That's all right.

Sure you don't want me to help?

Well, I'm going to go wait out on the back porch.

If Arthur comes, I'm gonna go ahead and leave.

See you later.

I'd like to have a phone.

I would really like to have a phone.

How about that game on Sunday, man?

It was pretty close. It could have gone either way.

Ok. We put your phones in upstairs and left the phone books up there for you.

- Thank you. - See you.

Christina: What do you think I am?

What do you think I am?

Oh, I'm so sick of you! I'm so sick of your attitude towards me!

I'm important, and I'm tired... I'm tired of waiting on that damn porch!

Don't give me that. I don't want to hear you say that!

I don't care where you were this time.

Where were you last week? Where were you the week before that?

Do you think I don't hear things?

I don't ever ask you, now, do I? Do I ever accuse you of anything?

I know what you're doing! I don't care. I don't care!

A man and a woman dancing.

- This is a man and a lady in bed? - Yeah. It's only $4.98.

I sell a lot of them.

Tj is here, you know.

Let me put your bags in your car for you.

I don't want no money. I just want to help you, baby.

That's all I want.

Snowcone?

- Snowcone? Oh, no snowcone. - How about a fudgicle?

I think we're gonna be a few minutes making up our minds.

Maybe you better take care of this man.

Do you have ice cream sandwiches?

A sandwich? One?

Child: I want an ice cream!

Hello.

Who is it, honey?

- Oh, Jesus. - Do you have anything?

- Uh... do you have anything? - I only give to organised charities.

- He can't hear you, you schmuck. - Jesus!

- All right? Come on. - Thank you.

I mean, uh... good luck.

Ok?

Call me when you know where you'll be, ok?

As soon as I know, I'll call, all right?

- Don't do anything I wouldn't do. - You know me better than that.

Woman's voice: Martin...

Martin...

Martin!

Richard?

Richard? Richard?

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin... Martin...

Who are you?

Oh, my god!

Look, let's not get excited about this.

There's no reason to get upset or anything, ok?

I don't know him!

- Are you all right? - He shot me with something.

- What did he do to you? - He shot me.

- I don't know who he is. - Have you seen him before?

He came to the door one day.

He came to the door, and he said he was deaf.

He shot me with something. Better call somebody.

I can't call anybody. You're not supposed to be here!

You're not supposed to be here. I can't call the police.

- Where did he go? - I don't know.

- I'm not gonna go out there and look. - Call somebody!

Lewis, I can't call anybody!

You are not supposed to be here! What am I supposed to do?

I don't care who finds out about us! He shot me with something!

Now call somebody! Call the police, hospital, ambulance, anybody!

- Call somebody! - I don't know who to call!

Lewis, who should I call?

The emergency number. Call 911.

I can't call 911. That's the police.

It's not the police! It's just a general emergency number!

Do you have a friend I can call?

- Is your car here? - Yeah.

Call the hospital. Tell them what happened. We'll be there in five minutes.

Ok. What hospital? I don't know what hospital!

- Mercy. Is mercy around here? - I don't know the number.

Call information. Get their number. Call them.

Information, can you give me the number of mercy hospital, please?

Thank you.

Shit. It's fucked up. Wait a minute.

I got to do it again.

I can't get through. I forgot the number.

Wait, I'm...

Shit!

Lewis, are you on the other phone?

Lewis, hang up the phone!

I can't get through. Hang up the phone, would you? Are you on it?

- Shit. What's the number? - I forgot the number.

- Hang up! - All right!

- Hang up! - I'm off. I hung up. I got my foot on it.

Is there another phone in this house?

Downstairs, in the game room.

You keep calling to get somebody, all right? Keep calling!

Uh... oh, shit. The number.

Bastard.

Lewis!

Open this door, you bastard!

You fucker, open this goddamn door!

Lewis, what happened?

Lewis!

Help!

No! No!

Get away from me!

No! Stop! Please! No!

What did you do to me?

What did you do to me?

Get out!

Go away.

Lewis! Lewis! Get away, Lewis!

Lewis, he's gonna...

Lewis, don't come in here! Look out!

Oh, Lewis!

Listen, we've got to get away from here!

Get on the phone! Get some help! Get anybody!

I'm gonna get that fucker!

Hello. This is 219. I need help.

Don't be afraid.

You'll just go to sleep.

I don't have to hurt you now.

You'll be all right.

You'll be all right.

You'll just fall asleep, and you'll wake up. I promise.

You'll be all right. You'll fall asleep and wake up.

You mean... you wanted me?

- You wanted me? - Yes.

Yes.

Yes, but I'm not going to hurt you now because of him.

Because of him.

You weren't supposed to be there.

Why were you there?

You weren't supposed to be there.

You weren't supposed to be there.

You weren't supposed to be there.

Nosferatu.

Mar tin: Gets crazy sometimes.

Sometimes I think they're really gonna catch me and hurt me or even kill me.

Man: Yeah, I've seen that in the movies...

People trying to stop your kind.

Martin: You have to really stay calm when that happens.

And you just have to remember that the ones that are after you are never calm.

People are never calm when they're angry.

Man: No, it's true. It's very true.

Mar tin: For a long time, I didn't care if they'd kill me.

Most people spend their lives worrying about dying.

For a long time, I wished I would die,

or I wished somebody would kill me.

It's been a long time for me.

A long time full of crazy people.

I'm pretty careful about not getting caught now.

I've learned a lot of things.

I have good tools.

- And I have the needles. - Needles?

It was really hard before the needles.

What kind of needles?

Count?

Woma n.' Martin...

Martin...

Everything's been pretty easy

- since I've learned how to be careful. - Mm-hm?

People are the hardest thing.

I understand.

When I see people together, they don't talk, not really.

- They don't say what they mean. - Right.

Then they... they have the other.

They have the sexy stuff.

Whenever they want.

I've been much too shy to ever do the sexy stuff.

I mean, do it with someone who was awake.

Er...

Someday maybe I I! Get to do it...

Awake, without the blood part.

Just do it with somebody and then be together,

and talk all night.

We've had questions from our listeners as to how often this happens.

I mean, every full moon?

I don't know. I lose track.

Not all the time.

That's not like in the movies either.

I saw a movie once where it happened every night.

That's crazy, because movies are crazy.

So you mean to tell me all those movies aren't true?

What else isn't true? Are you gonna dispel any other myths,

like getting back to your grave before sun-up or garlic...

It's all crazy.

Uh-huh!

So you don't burn up to a crisp in the sunlight? Nothing like that?

Well, the sun bothers my eyes sometimes, especially when it's about time,

when I get shaky.

Well, listen, count, my sponsor's getting shaky, so I've got to take a break.

Hang on a minute.

Night-timers, we've been talking to the count.

Yes, a real, live, honest-to-goodness vampire.

And if you have any questions you'd like to pass on to the count,

how about giving me a call here at 555-1650?

Be back in a moment.

Be back in a moment.

Talk about a sale. This week's sale at Mason's.

Accent storage tables, some of our best-selling...

Count, are you there?

Hey, count? Count?

- Count, are you there, man? - Hello?

Say, man, where can I get a hold of you? This is really going over big.

I mean, it's very good. We have a lot of people calling

and they're very interested.

Count, I'd like to talk to you. I'd like to have you come down to the station...

66 dollars. A 54 by 20 by 16 now 66 dollars.

You stay in my house. Will you embarrass me like this?

This is a catholic family. I will not be seen in church without you. Get dressed.

And Jesus answered them,

"have not I chosen you twelve, and one of you is a devil?"

He spake of Judas iscariot, the son of Simon

for he it was that should betray him, being one of the twelve.

So ends the gospel according to st John.

Instead of a sermon today,

I think that we need to discuss the problem of rebuilding the church.

Being new to the community, I've asked Deacon Roy to talk to you about this.

We need a good bit of money if we hope to rebuild this parish.

Deacon Roy, if you would address the congregation.

Thank you.

First of all...

The tragedy of our church being burned down,

I understand, has shaken some of our parishioners' faith.

This need not be.

Now is the time to express your faith.

For example, if we go to our homes when we leave here

and see things that we do not use laying around, that we can sell,

that's one way to raise money.

Hold raffles.

And we can all get together and furnish labour.

Thank you for coming.

Thank you for coming.

Will you come up to the house sometime?

Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.

Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

We will have supper late tomorrow night.

I invited the new priest to come to our house for supper.

You will make a good dinner.

Sure you wouldn't like something in that?

You don't mind if I do, right?

J“ I don't mind at all being alone

j“ when I think to back then when we lay and you held me like home

j“ you held me like home... j“

I'm sorry. I didn't meant to frighten you.

It's just that you're...

So gentle.

So nice.

I only want to hold you.

Martin, don't be so afraid.

The door is finished.

Father corelli was in braddock 42... No, 43 years before he left.

No. Thank you.

I'd like to have a little more wine.

You like this wine? Gorinzkas made this wine.

I like it, too.

Gorinzkas. I don't know him. Is he catholic?

A good catholic, yes, father Howard.

But you wouldn't know him. He left even before corelli.

That's too bad. I would have commissioned him to make some wine for the church.

I don't suppose it's sacrilege to say that the wine at st Vincent's is putrid.

You were sent here, or you asked to come?

I was sent by the diocese when father corelli retired.

Retired? Ha!

Father corelli is younger than I am.

He asked to leave. He left.

Like the rest of them - they think this town is finished.

No. He has cancer.

He's very near the end. In fact, I haven't heard. He may be gone.

Oh, thank you.

You're welcome.

This is a town for old persons, father Howard.

You know the things an old person wants from a priest?

Oh, this is very sweet.

An old person needs a priest who thinks the way the old person thinks.

A priest who believes in the old ways.

That's why I use the Latin mass here in braddock. I think people around here...

Do you believe in demons, father Howard?

Do you believe the devil can enter a person's soul?

- I don't know what to believe about that. - You don't know, father Howard? Ha!

You see, this is what I mean.

This is not what an old person wants to hear from a priest.

Father Howard, would you like some more cookies?

No, thanks.

- Can I get you anything else? - No, no. I'm fine.

If our priests cannot save us from such things, who can, father Howard?

Well, I've had several conversations about this with some of my associates

and I think...

I think it's a difficult issue. It's something that has to be dealt with.

Grandfather, stop it. You're gonna scare father Howard away.

Fascinating subject, actually. You should talk to father zulemas about this.

- Father... - Zulemas.

- Zulemas. - He a great old guy.

He claims to have actually done the old mystical rites, for real.

He went to see that film the exorcist. He said they did it all wrong.

Zulemas.

I don't suppose you saw that movie. I thought it was great.

Martin...

Martin...

Nosferatu...

I cast you out...

Unclean spirit,

along with every satanic power of the enemy,

every spectre from hell,

and all your felled companions.

In the name of our lord Jesus Christ.

It is he who commands you.

Harken, therefore, and tremble in fear, Satan,

you enemy of the faith, you foe of the human race,

you begetter of death, you robber of life,

you corrupter of justice, you root of all evil and vice,

seducer of men, betrayer of the nations, instigator of envy,

fountain of avarice, fomenter of discord,

author of pain and sorrow.

Why, then, do you stand and resist...

Knowing that Christ our lord brings your plans to nothing?

By the sign of the holy cross of our lord Jesus Christ,

who lives and reigns with the father and the holy spirit,

god and forever...

All amen.

Amen.

The lord be with you all.

May he also be with you?

May he also be with you.

Let us pray.

Look down in pity on this, your servant, Martin,

now in the toils of the unclean spirit,

now caught up in the fearsome threats of man's ancient enemy,

sworn foe of our race...

Martin...

Martin...

Martin...

By the sign of the cross...

Martin...

Keep watch over the innermost recesses of his heart.

Whoo!

Devil!

You are the devil.

You devil, you!

It's just a costume.

It's only a costume.

Waitjust a minute. I'll get some money.

How about a little painting tomorrow?

Joey's out of town again, and he left the game room half finished.

You want me here for sex, don't you?

I never really did it before. I was always too shy.

But I decided...

I'd really like to do it with you.

I'm all dressed now.

Why are you crying?

Why are you crying?

It's nothing.

Did I hurt you? What did I do?

You didn't do anything, Martin.

You're worrying about having a kid.

I knew I should have worn one of those things.

Oh, Jesus, Martin.

It's nothing to do with you.

- Really? - Really.

Worrying about having a kid?

I can't have kids.

I can never have kids.

There's something wrong inside.

I don't know.

What do you think?

Is that good for me or bad for me?

No opinion?

That's why you're so nice to have around, Martin.

You don't have opinions.

- You took it down. - What?

You took it down.

Oh, I thought it was stupid, a stupid superstition.

I just didn't want it there, that's all.

I was right, wasn't I?

Hurry and come down to supper. I'm going out tonight.

Get the goddamn stogy out of your mouth and don't burn me up.

I'll try not to.

Don't try to burn me up.

Nope. I've just got to get out of here, that's all.

I say go to all of you.

If you don't want to be here, then we don't need you!

I want to be here.

I've been here since I was a kid.

Hey, but I'm a good mechanic.

I should be fixing cars. What am I doing here?

Like William korinzkas,

like molinopzkus.

It's good for Christina not to be married yet.

She's young for her years.

Maybe it's good for her never to marry.

You know, we have a problem...

- In the family. - What?

- You've seen the boy, Martin. - Yeah.

Oh, it is a problem.

It is the shame of us parents.

- You want to have children, don't you? - Yes.

Think about it. Just think about it.

You're still here.

I guess...

I guess he... couldn't come.

I guess, uh...

I don't like Arthur.

He makes you feel bad.

Oh, Martin, it isn't Arthur. It's...

I don't expect any more from Arthur. It's...

It's everything. It's...

It's everything.

Arthur told me about the conversation you had with him.

It's such bullshit, grandfather. It is so goddamn hypocritical.

There is insanity in this family, and you've got it!

You will not use such language in my house.

Language? Shit on the language!

Well, goodbye, grandfather cuda.

Where will you go?

I leave tomorrow morning with Arthur.

Oh, but don't worry. We won't have any offspring.

We won't even wind up together.

Arthur's just my way out.

Christina...

You are wrong.

Well, then, too bad for me.

If you need anything, you just call me or...

Or come. I'll send you the money.

No. You'll forget about me.

No, I won't. Why do you think I'll forget?

Because you're going away.

People always go away so they can forget where they were.

Well, I won't. You'll see. I won't forget.

I'll tell you where I am.

Martin! Will you finish your breakfast?

I wish you could shoot me up with drugs,

take away a piece of my brain or something.

Boy, do I wish what you have is catching.

Some people think it is catching.

In the movies, it's catching.

Give it to me.

Please.

Martin, you're lazy!

You're a lazy boy!

Cuda, you make him work!

We work hard around here!

Martin: There's a lot of people I could do it to if! Wanted.

Radio host: Oh, stay away from your old friend Barry.

Martin: I know a lot of people. I know what they do.

I've watched them a lot, and I know what they do.

I've been letting them go, even the ones who are really mean to me all the time.

- I just decided to let them go. - Uh-huh?

So I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm getting pretty shaky.

I'm really getting shaky.

Can I bring your buggy back? You ain't got to pay no cash.

I don't want no money...

Martin: And when I try to find somebody to do it to, [can't decide. It's like...

None of the ladies look pretty.

I don't know. I used to be able to decide fast.

I used to be able to find somebody really fast.

The ladies looked pretty or something.

- Quiet! - Please.

Leave her alone!

Man, what you doing?

Maybe it's just because I'm doing the sexy stuff without the blood now.

Doing it with an awake person.

I don't know.

He looks really good in his tennis shoes, doesn't he?

Hey, that's where that loony lives, man.

Hey, give me that beer can, will you?

I can hit that loony with the beer can. Come on.

Give me a beer can.

Whoo! Hey!

All right. How about a beer?

Give me a beer.

You know, you didn't have to like all of that attention that he was giving you.

What can I say? Beggars can't be choosers.

Yeah?

Well, you can beg and choose me, can't you?

Sure can.

Martin: I've got to do something. I've got to pick somebody.

I'm getting so shaky, I might make a mistake.

A mistake?

I might make a mistake and get caught.

Hear that, night-timers?

The count is getting thirsty.

So watch out!

Watch out, night-timers. He might be in your neighbourhood.

Oh, I found me a place to sleep here tonight.

Oh, here's a special here... '64 buick, $75.

I only want to sleep all night long.

Here's a '60 Chevy, as is...

Hey!

Go up to the West Side.

Freeze!

Take the car in front of the warehouse. I'll follow him on foot.

This is car 14 reporting. Lozono on foot.

I'm going around to the front of the warehouse.

Guys, guys, quiet.

- What's that? What's that noise? - Wait a minute. I'll check it out.

What the hell are you doing here? What you want in here?

Oh, it's just a little kid.

Wait a minute. It's just a kid. It's just a kid.

Hey, Stevie, man, be cool.

What you want in here? Why don't you leave? Get the fuck out!

Freeze!

Good time of the year to go south.

You ever been to Mexico?

I was in Mexico... about two years ago.

You don't have the travel section, do you?

Can't depend on the newspapers any more.

But you don't... you don't know what you're gonna do, huh?

Martin: No, [really don't. I really don't.

I never got a letter from Christina.

I knew she'd forget.

Radio host: Hmm, that's too bad.

Yeah, that is too bad.

Martin: I guess I shouldn't have friends.

- No. - I was getting pretty mixed up.

No, that's right. You shouldn't get involved. It's... it's dangerous, right?

Right. You forget. You make mistakes.

Live for yourself whatever it takes, right?

Get through the night, right, count?

Are you making fun of me?

I'm with you, count. I mean, you're absolutely right.

You're all right, my man.

Well, I don't know what I'm gonna do. I really don't.

Cathy!

Martin...

I didn't do it.

- I didn't do it. - Mm-hm? Ok.

- I really didn't. - Ok.

In a way, I'm glad it's all over.

I shouldn't have friends, not even for the sexy stuff.

And that's another thing about those movies.

Vampires always have ladies, sometimes lots of ladies.

Well, that's wrong, too. You don't need all that.

You don't need that?

No, you really don't.

I mean, if the magic part was real

and you could make them do whatever you wanted to...

- Oh, yeah. - Well, that would be different.

In real life...

In real life, you can't get people to do what you want them to do.

- You get used to things, you know. - Yeah, sure.

You get used to your life.

And it all gets easier.

Cuda: I warned you, Martin. Nobody in the town, I said.

Nobody in the town.

I heard about mrs santini.

You think I believe she killed herself?

Do you really think I believe this?

Your soul is damned, nosferatu.

- Yeah, that's him. I liked him. - I wonder where the count is.

I know he's out there somewhere. He hasn't called in a long time.

Right, the count. Yes, the count. We all want to know what happened to the count.

What do you think happened to the count?

Barry, what happened to the count?

The count! What happened to the count?

The question of the year is what happened to the count?

Yeah, what happened to the count?

I don't know. What happened to the count?

The man who called about the vampire.

All right, our man the count, yes.

Do you have any information on the vampire?

Oh, the count!

We have a call for the count.

I kind of hope you're listening out there. The people want to hear from you.

Go ahead. What's your concern about the count?

I wondered where he was, and while I was wondering, I wrote a song about him.

"Black cape and shiny".

No, his cape is not black, you understand.

No, he stands cool, and his cape has got patterns on it, like a Paisley.

- A Paisley? - And he wears a big apple cap.

- Yes, go ahead, sir. - This is a call I heard.

You sound Polish. We have a Polish vampire.

We enjoy your show. I hope you get him back.

Ok. And it was a good gimmick.

I think I know where the count is. I have a friend who I think is the count.