Original subtitles

[music]

How's the dinner going, Cora?

Everything's going good! I'm almost done.

[thunderclap] Oh my goodness.

Oh, that's terrible!

Well, the news said we're under a tornado watch.

Mm-hmm, I better make sure the residents know

we have a storm shelter in the basement.

-Now, that's a great idea. -For in case that tornado comes.

Oh my!

Girl, you wearin' that dress, honey!

Whoo, look at you!

Shake what your momma gave you!

Oh my goodness!

And Cora, thank you for cooking up

this incredible meal for my baby.

Of course!

I had to make it special for Sandra and for you.

-Now, are you okay? -Mm! I hope so. [laughs]

My emotions have been all over the place.

You thought the graduation was bad.

Girl, it was bad!

[laughing]

We thought we were gonna send you to the hospital!

Oh, when they said her name,

and she walked across the stage, Cora, I lost it.

I know, we all did!

Girl, I even shed a few tears myself.

That was good.

[Mr. Brown] Come on, come on!

Oh, the guests are coming.

Okay, lookin' good, lookin' nice.

[Mr. Brown] Okay, everybody, come on!

I would like to officially welcome you to

Pleasant Day La Soul

for the graduation of the contingence of the--

Okay, Brown, we get it.

Just where the hell do we sit, man?

Vinny, I just need you to shut up.

Matter of fact, don't say nuthin' else.

-[Cora] Mr. Brown-- -This is classy.

Every time you open your mouth, class runs out the room.

Your momma's ghetto and your cousin, too!

[exclaiming]

Hey, this is supposed to be a special occasion, okay?

Now Mr. Brown, this is beautiful.

Thank you!

You did all this for my baby girl?

Yes, I did this for Madame Sandra

as we re-pre-prepare to celebrate her homegoing

of college education as we know that we have--

Okay, Brown, keep it simple. Less is more.

You know you too dumb to put together intelligent sentences.

You know that, don't you?

I'm with Vinny.

Just shut up and tell us where we're supposed to sit.

Ain't nobody sittin' nowhere

until the guest of honor come in, Jezebel!

-[Jeremy] Hey! -Mr. Brown!

What were we thinking

when we had you host this evening, clown?

Well, what y'all was thinking

is y'all wanted something upscale and classy.

No, as I remember, the discussion

centered around economics.

Yes, to save all the resources to be given to Sandra

for her upcoming expenses at college.

So you got the job because you work for free,

not because you were classy.

Ooh, ooh, Judge Junie!

I'm sorry, Ms. Cora, but your father is a jackass.

Okay, if you want somethin',

you can step right across there--

Don't forget your classiness, huh? Jackass.

Oh, you want somethin' too, Efe?

[shouting]

Hey, hey, won't y'all stop all of this cussing and bickering?

Now look, I done put together some non-alcohol champagne

over there to toast to Sandra,

and I need y'all to go get a glass.

Thank you so much. That's so sweet of you.

You and Grandpa, thank you.

This for Philip, this is yours.

[group cheering]

-[Cora] He clean! -[Jeremy] Yeah, boy!

Yeah, boy!

Uh-huh.

Whoo, my baby's sharp!

Here she comes, everybody.

[Cora] Beautiful!

Hi, everyone.

Speech, a speech.

I am so pleased to have you all celebrate with me

the night before I leave for Crawford College

to begin my new chapter.

I feel like the luckiest girl in the world

to have been blessed with all of you.

I mean, you all are family to me, and I love you.

-[Group] Aww! -I love you too.

That was a beautiful speech, baby girl!

Thanks, Mom.

Let's toast to my baby.

[Mr. Brown] To Madame Sandra!

[cheering]

[thunderclap]

-What the hell? -Big lightning!

Here's the drink, everybody!

[thunder rumbling]

[Efe] Hey, Sandra...

What is it, Mr. Brown? Huh?

Aaaah!

It's burning, aah!

I can't breathe!

It's burning, aah!

It's burning, aah! Aah!

-Wait! -Aah!

-Wait! -Aah!

[screaming]

Wait, wait, wait...

Oh, Mr. Brown!

-Somebody poisoned Mr. Brown! -Wake up, Mr. Brown!

[group screaming]

[theme music]

♪ No matter what you do, I love you ♪

♪ No matter where you go, I'm behind you for sure ♪

♪ Always remember, blood ain't never water ♪

♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪

The generator just kicked in.

The storm must've knocked out the power.

[gasping]

Don't anybody move!

Someone in this room

is a murderer.

[gasping]

Is he really...dead?

Deader than a doorknob.

[gasping]

I guess it's true what they say--

be careful what you pray for.

How can you be so callous, Vinny?

You brute!

You oughta be ashamed of yourself, Vinny!

Prayin' that Mr. Brown kicked the bucket!

Shouldn't we call the authorities?

Yes!

Wait, don't call the po-po!

You're right! We should handle this ourselves!

Here, we're going to need some lime

and a king of spades shovel.

-And some garbage bags. -Yes.

Lots of garbage bags.

Okay, awkward!

Sounds like experience talking.

Kids, come away from Mr. Efe.

You got something you wanna tell us, Efe?

That's what I thought.

W-w-w-what? I watch a lot of TV.

Mm!

I'm calling the authorities!

Wait, don't call the po-po!

The murderer, it seems, made his hatred for Mr. Brown

apparent to all parties present.

[gasping]

And now he doesn't want us to call the police.

[gasping]

Eliminated by his own business partner, Vinny!

[gasping]

Was money your motive?

Wait, what? I didn't like Mr. Brown.

But if you're saying I killed Mr. Brown, you're wrong.

I promise, if I was to kill Mr. Brown,

I wouldn't use poison. I'm from Chicago, brother!

I'd bust a cap in his ass with my twenty-two!

[gasping]

Yes, but poison can be very clean and effective.

Okay, now you're really scaring me.

The phone lines are dead.

[gasping]

I'm not getting a cell signal.

[gasping]

-Me neither. -[gasps]

It seems the weather has taken out the cell phone tower.

What are we to do!?

[Reginald] So here we are.

One among us is a murderer.

[gasping]

It will be up to us to find out

who took the life of our beloved Mr. Brown.

[thunderclap]

[screaming]

[pants]

Don't look at me! I didn't make the champagne!

Champagne?

That is the last thing he drank.

Well, who made the champagne?

-Cora! -[gasping]

If my years as a judge have taught me nothing else,

it taught me that it's always the one closest to the victim.

Mm-hmm, like I said, the Christian!

How could you murder your own father?

[gasping]

What is wrong with you guys? I wouldn't--no!

Well, Ms. Cora,

I remember you were very upset with Mr. Brown yesterday.

Man, I am so mad at that Mr. Brown!

Oh no, honey. What--what did he do?

Can you believe it? He went down there

and had an argument with Mother Betty at the church,

and had the nerve to pull me into it!

What did he say?

And then had the nerve, in front of everybody,

he gonna say, "That's why Cora don't like you!"

Can you believe it?

He told her you don't like her?

Yes, can you believe that?

Well, wait, do you like Mother Betty?

No, the Lord forgive me, but I don't like her.

Well, then so he didn't lie on you.

That is not the point, Efe!

The thing is, is I told him something in confidence!

Just went down there and blurted the entire conversation.

Mother Betty mad at me, her feelings is hurt.

And she don't wanna talk to me.

You can't tell Brown nuthin'.

Now, you know he can't hold water.

Oh, but when I get my hands on him, boy, I'm just gonna--

I may break him! Whoa, I may break him!

I cannot believe he would say something like that.

I can't believe him!

Mr. Brown, get out of here.

Mr. Brown, you're not scared?

Cora gonna kill me, ain't she?

-Yes. Run. -You need me to run?

Run! Run, Mr. Brown!

Pretty damning recollection.

But I didn't do it! I promise y'all, I didn't!

Someone here did this, unless...

there's a crazed killer somewhere on the premises.

[gasping]

Oh my!

Are you saying that

there's a crazed killer on the loose

somewhere in the facility?

What other explanation could there be?

[group screaming]

Okay, look, I know I got wet, but man, do I look that bad?

-Lindor? -Yeah, it's me.

You guys looked at me like I was some crazed killer or something.

[Reginald] [clears throat]

Okay, what's--what's going on here?

Someone killed Mr. Brown.

What?

How, man!?

Where did you get that antifreeze from, son?

Ah, antifreeze!

It has poisoned many a people.

It is preferable by some because it is easily accessible--

Th-th-there you go again, man!

Okay.

I watch too much of the Forensic Channel.

So what are you doing with antifreeze, young man?

[thunderclap]

Whoa, whoa, no, I got that for Mr. Washington.

[gasping]

Jeremy!

You're involved in this too?

So you called for antifreeze, Jeremy?

No.

Uh, yeah.

You called me, like, 30 minutes ago,

asking if I could pick it up on the way.

Do you not remember that?

I mean, yeah, but...

So, the two of you are in this together?

Well--well, in what together?

Say no more, Jeremy.

What you need to do now is skip town!

Right away.

Grow a beard, gain some weight,

and spend the rest of your entire life

in a small South American village,

eating plantain and staying off the grid.

Stop it, Grandpa!

Don't you put that on my husband.

So Jeremy, what are you doing with antifreeze?

Okay, everybody stop looking at me like this.

You all know I'm taking Sandra to college tomorrow

and had to top off all fluids before the ride

because I'm having dinner tonight.

Now, I had Lindor stop by and bring it over here on his way.

I have nothing to do with this.

Methinks he doth protest too much!

What?

It's a Shakespeare reference, Dad.

We learned it when we read Hamlet.

It means she thinks you're guilty.

My dad wouldn't poison anyone, Ms. Anastasia!

Oh no?

What about you, young scholar?

Now, you hold it now, Judge.

Don't you dare pick on my kids!

I'm sorry, but there is a killer on the loose,

and I aim to find out who he is.

Ah ha!

You two have motive.

Standing there as though you're so innocent,

and you're guilty as sin!

What motive?

Mr. Brown has had you doing a whole lot of work lately.

He made me fix those people's things

while he was making money behind my back.

And he did trick me into being his assistant

for my senior volunteer work.

So you admit you were upset with Mr. Brown,

and thus, you had motive.

Aw, damn, you kids don't know nothin'!

Jeremy, I told you to bring these kids

to the hood more often!

Don't say nothing else, kids.

It's too late!

The ire is upon them, I'm afraid.

And you too, Leah.

Seldom have I seen a sadder example

of the unraveling of our society's morals and values.

A murder involving an entire family!

Oh, what a wicked web we weave!

Now I understand the conversation

that Efe and I walked in on yesterday.

[gasps]

You're right!

The murder of Mr. Brown is a family affair.

They're all involved in it.

I can't believe you leavin' us, baby girl.

I'm not leaving the family, Mom. I'm just going to college.

And not soon enough.

We're gonna have a special dinner for you tomorrow night.

We gonna send you off properly.

-Oh, there y'all go. -What's going on, Mr. Brown?

I need you and the kids to help me do some work

out in the shed.

What's the project, Mr. Brown?

Yeah, and how much you payin'?

Why do people always gotta be paid for something?

Why you can't do something for free just to be nice?

You took advantage of me fixing things and got paid for it.

Well, you shouldn't hold a grudge, "Phirup."

-Philip! -Whatever it is.

And you made me do all that work for free as your assistant.

The kids didn't forget about that yet, Mr. Brown.

And neither have we, Mr. Brown.

Don't worry, Mr. Brown, we got something for you.

When you least expect it.

[evil laughter]

Looks like we've happened up on a family squabble.

I think so. Let us see our way out of it.

[evil laughter]

[screams]

Philip, Sandra?

Mr. and Mrs. Washington? How could you!?

How could I let you bastards move in with me?

All y'all got to go!

[screaming]

Get away from me! Get away from me!

Get away from me!

Mr. Brown, calm down, calm down, please!

-Ain't no calm down, Cora! -Yes, Mr. Brown,

we were just about to do a toast and you fell out!

You too, Cora!

You of all people, my own daughter,

trying to murder her daddy!

-No, Mr. Brown. -You get away from me!

-Please, sit down. -Ain't no sit down

knowing your whole family involved!

You even got the babies trying to murder me.

Get away from me!

-Are you okay, Mr. Brown? -He's talking crazy.

Come on, I'm gonna put some ice on your head.

Sit down.

Baby, we may need to take him to the doctor.

Ain't nobody need no doctor.

Oh no, oh no, I'll take him to the doctor.

You need to stay for Sandra's dinner.

But as soon as the doctor says Mr. Brown is okay,

we'll be back, all right?

Come on, Mr. Brown.

[Philip] It's good to have you back.

You get away from me with that antifreeze!

Get away from me with this antifreeze!

-Get away from me! -Calm down, Mr. Brown!

You must've been dreaming when you bumped your head.

Yes, you were dreaming, Mr. Brown.

-I was dreaming? -[Cora] Yes.

Oh, it was a nightmare.

Cora, I was dreaming that they tried to killed me.

And then Leah said that I was deader than a doornail.

[laughs] That dream was my fantasy,

that's what that was.

[Mr. Brown] Shut up, Vinny!

And then--and then, uh, uh, the judge right here,

he was determined to find out who had killed me, Cora.

-Who killed you? -Yes!

He killed me with some antifreeze, Cora.

[laughter]

With antifreeze?

[Mr. Brown] Yes, from antifreeze!

You are hilarious, Mister--

Mr. Brown, why would anyone want to poison you?

-We all love you. -You all love me?

[group agreeing]

-What you got-- -Ice. It's just ice.

-No, Mr. Brown-- -I got you, Mr. Brown.

I'll take you to the doctor as soon as the storm let up, okay?

-Okay, y'all love me? -Yes.

Y'all, let's just have a toast. Come on, man!

Good idea, good idea.

Yeah, everybody grab your champagne.

-Come on, Mr. Brown. -The devil is alive!

I ain't drinkin' with y'all!

[Cora] What are you doing?

Sandra, I just--I just wanna say that...

I'm so proud of you, and I'm gonna miss you a lot.

I'm gonna miss you too.

[Jeremy] Hey, hey, hey!

-Sorry. -Don't do that.

[Philip] You just got served.

Baby girl, I am so proud of you.

You have grown to be a beautiful young woman.

When I saw you walk across the stage, I took--

Hyperventilated.

Can I just finish my speech, please?

Go ahead, baby. Don't pay him no mind.

I'm done.

I just...I just wanna say I love you

and I'm so proud of you.

That was beautiful, Leah.

And I, too, am proud of you, Sandra.

And by the way, that dress?

-Flawless, baby. -[laughter]

Thank you for helping me pick it out.

My pleasure, darling.

Sandra.

In my country, we give a pendant to a woman

who has made her family proud.

May goodness follow you always.

Thank you, Mr. Efe.

Sandra, may you enjoy your college years.

Cherish every moment.

An education is a gift not afforded to everyone.

I will. Thank you, Mr. Reginald.

[cries]

You got it, Dad.

[sighs]

[cries]

Who are these people?

Sandra...

when you were born,

I asked God to walk with me,

to help your mother, to help us,

raise an amazing daughter.

And you here today?

Is proof that--that God is--

[sobs]

Sit your cryin' ass down.

Did we miss anything?

Oh, Mr. Brown, how are you?

Oh, oh, I'm "the tip tree" of good health.

It's "the epitome," Mr. Brown.

Cora, don't--don't--don't

correct me in front of everybody.

Don't do that. Not in front of everybody.

What? They're family.

Anyway, like I was saying,

we so proud and we gonna miss you.

And then I just wanna say, shut up!

Shut up!

[laughs]

[Both] Shut up!

Gonna miss ya.

I love you and I'm proud of you.

Oh!

So beautiful!

Thank you.

Okay, it, uh-- it's my turn.

-Oh gosh. -Oh lord.

Here we go.

Sandra, I'm so glad you can fish.

Fish, Grandpa?

Yeah, Sandra's never been fishing.

It's a metaphor.

And Ms. Cora, you might know this.

The Bible says--

Don't you blaspheme--

[Vinny] Oh, I'm not, no.

The Bible says,

give a kid a fish, and he will eat for a day.

Where it say that in the Bible?

It's in the coming soon Bible.

It's not out yet.

They're writing it as we speak.

Y'all Christians don't know everything.

The Bible says, give a kid a fish and it will eat for a day.

Teach a kid to fish, and it will eat for a lifetime.

Sandra, I'm so glad you're going to college,

because this family needs some "ed-u-ma-kay-shon."

Okay, Grandpa Vinny, thanks.

My turn. [clears throat]

Sandra, I got you a gift.

A gift?

My jacket.

Yeah, I found it online, since I lost the last one.

So I bought you a new one.

Thank you, Philip!

Love you, sis.

[Leah] [sobs]

I can't, I can't, I can't...

-Here you go, baby. -Oh goodness, my babies!

Who are these people?

Crying in this family!

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