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1
00:00:03,670 --> 00:00:07,471
Planet crust... 59.6% silica.
2
00:00:07,473 --> 00:00:10,942
Again with the silica.
It's always silica.
3
00:00:10,944 --> 00:00:13,878
Scan complete.
Minimal resources detected.
4
00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:15,880
Planet has low potential.
5
00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:18,149
Looks like my decision's made for me.
6
00:00:18,151 --> 00:00:20,785
Navigation, set course for home.
7
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:25,557
What the?
8
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:31,075
Aah!
9
00:00:37,931 --> 00:00:38,936
Aah!
10
00:00:45,111 --> 00:00:48,112
Aah!
11
00:01:17,210 --> 00:01:20,344
Fuel core not found.
Switching to reserve power.
12
00:01:20,346 --> 00:01:23,291
Reserve power sufficient
for orbital launch.
13
00:01:23,326 --> 00:01:24,382
That's good news.
14
00:01:24,384 --> 00:01:27,451
Reserve power depleted by
orbital launch calculations.
15
00:01:28,522 --> 00:01:30,989
That's bad design.
16
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:34,526
I gotta find that fuel core.
17
00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:45,603
Can't let the inhabitants see me.
18
00:01:46,741 --> 00:01:47,872
Shit.
19
00:01:47,874 --> 00:01:50,008
Salutations, fellow traveler.
20
00:01:50,010 --> 00:01:53,545
Well, you don't look like
you're from around here.
21
00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:55,813
You must be a hobo!
22
00:01:55,815 --> 00:01:59,684
A poor hobo wandering the
desert like an Israelite.
23
00:01:59,686 --> 00:02:03,755
I'm Freddy Underwood,
Bible salesman and good Samaritan.
24
00:02:03,757 --> 00:02:05,757
And you're coming with me.
25
00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:07,993
- I don't want to.
- I insist.
26
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,095
So you're taking me prisoner?
27
00:02:11,097 --> 00:02:13,631
I'm taking you for a hot meal.
28
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:15,900
So you're gonna eat me, then?
29
00:02:16,388 --> 00:02:18,036
I don't eat hobos!
30
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:20,372
Not since the great depression.
31
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,444
As reports come in of a large crash
32
00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:29,581
somewhere in the desert of
what some are saying was
33
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:32,684
an unidentified flying object.
34
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:38,990
I'm not much for news
unless it's the good news.
35
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:41,726
Used to be a preacher.
Preached the good book.
36
00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:45,597
Then something happened.
Now I sell the good book!
37
00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:50,668
Don't believe in it anymore
because of what happened.
38
00:02:50,670 --> 00:02:53,004
And here we are!
39
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,539
Grandma Macadoo's boarding house.
40
00:02:55,541 --> 00:02:57,075
You're gonna like her.
41
00:02:57,077 --> 00:02:59,677
She's a warm, earthy woman...
42
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:01,479
...but saltier than lot's wife!
43
00:03:01,481 --> 00:03:05,217
I got a hungry one for you,
young miss Macadoo.
44
00:03:05,219 --> 00:03:07,886
Little guy with long arms, huh?
45
00:03:07,888 --> 00:03:09,553
I dropped a dirty sex book
46
00:03:09,555 --> 00:03:11,355
on the far side of my claw-foot tub.
47
00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:15,960
If you can reach it, I'll give ya
a big plate of chipped beef.
48
00:03:15,962 --> 00:03:18,096
Ah, he's runnin' away.
49
00:03:18,098 --> 00:03:22,233
Grandma,
this jackrabbit's head's all mushy!
50
00:03:22,235 --> 00:03:24,803
Ew. Gross!
51
00:03:26,172 --> 00:03:28,940
Can I make his head all mushy?
52
00:03:53,367 --> 00:03:55,633
Oh good, I'm up!
53
00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:04,776
Rip Van Winkle rises!
54
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:06,778
I need to go.
55
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:08,179
Suit yourself.
56
00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:12,984
Ha ha! Someone smells that chipped beef.
57
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,386
Chipped beef again?
58
00:04:14,388 --> 00:04:16,388
What did think you were getting, Luis?
59
00:04:16,390 --> 00:04:17,455
A salad?!
60
00:04:17,829 --> 00:04:19,391
None for me, please.
61
00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:20,859
Watching my figure.
62
00:04:20,861 --> 00:04:23,195
Screen stars have to stay trim.
63
00:04:23,197 --> 00:04:26,398
I'm Roslyn Jenkins,
not that you know the name yet.
64
00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,867
I'm in New Mexico for a brief respite.
65
00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:31,135
Then I'm off to be a young ingenue for
66
00:04:31,137 --> 00:04:33,071
Metro Goldwyn and Mayer.
67
00:04:33,073 --> 00:04:35,407
You've been here nine years.
68
00:04:35,409 --> 00:04:36,741
You're 60, right?
69
00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:38,210
I'm not 60!
70
00:04:38,212 --> 00:04:40,544
It's this damn dry air.
71
00:04:40,546 --> 00:04:43,081
Uncle Cosworth, you joining us?
72
00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:46,150
Soon as I get this old girl loaded.
73
00:04:46,152 --> 00:04:49,353
Uncle Cosworth is one of the
last living civil war veterans.
74
00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:51,756
He liked shooting so much,
he fought for both sides.
75
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:55,159
Clifton! Put your little
club down and eat something.
76
00:04:57,431 --> 00:05:01,032
You know, I heard on the
radio that some people think
77
00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:04,035
they saw a Martian spaceship last night.
78
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:06,438
Ya listen to my radio,
ya pay me a nickel!
79
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,840
I'll tell you something.
As a crop duster...
80
00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,709
I'm a crop duster.
I spend a lot of time in the air.
81
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:13,978
And I've seen my fair
share of things in the sky
82
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,647
that I cannot explain.
83
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,715
Once I saw what appeared
to be a black bird,
84
00:05:17,717 --> 00:05:19,917
but it had the body of a mouse.
85
00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:21,919
And it was nighttime!
86
00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:24,322
Sounds like a bat to me, friend.
87
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,523
A what?!
88
00:05:27,261 --> 00:05:29,927
I also fought in the
Spanish-American war
89
00:05:29,929 --> 00:05:31,663
in 1898.
90
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,798
Tremendous war.
91
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,867
I don't know what it was about,
92
00:05:35,869 --> 00:05:39,203
but I'm sure we were the good guys.
93
00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:41,739
Luis, you don't know when that airplane
94
00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:43,275
is gonna drop like a stone.
95
00:05:43,277 --> 00:05:45,543
You need to be at peace
with the big bearded man
96
00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:46,744
in the clouds.
97
00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,480
You need a Bible.
98
00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:50,548
But you don't believe in the Bible.
99
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:52,817
Some big bearded man in the clouds?
100
00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:54,418
I'm not an idiot!
101
00:05:54,420 --> 00:05:56,488
But you can't afford to take chances.
102
00:05:56,490 --> 00:06:00,358
And I'd believe the Bible if I could,
trust that, but I can't.
103
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,560
I'm locked out of the gates
104
00:06:02,562 --> 00:06:05,563
because of all of those hobos I ate.
105
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:11,102
And if you make new chipped beef
inside the old chipped beef,
106
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,571
you never have to wash the pot!
107
00:06:13,573 --> 00:06:17,775
But do I make my debut
in comedy or tragedy?
108
00:06:17,777 --> 00:06:20,178
I mean, I can do both equal...
109
00:06:20,180 --> 00:06:22,314
Clifton! It's dead already!
110
00:06:22,922 --> 00:06:24,849
All done?
111
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:27,919
I suppose that means
you'll be hitting the road?
112
00:06:38,849 --> 00:06:41,333
Evening, madam. I'm with the OSS.
113
00:06:41,335 --> 00:06:43,668
Wait, sorry, the CIA.
114
00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:46,137
They just changed the name on us.
115
00:06:46,139 --> 00:06:47,939
I'm agent Avery Bullock.
116
00:06:47,941 --> 00:06:50,942
Wait, sorry, Avery Bullock Senior.
117
00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:54,145
I just had a son,
and he changed my name on me.
118
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:55,880
Hello, citizens!
119
00:06:55,882 --> 00:06:58,082
I'm sure you've all heard about a crash
120
00:06:58,084 --> 00:06:59,417
that happened last night,
121
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:02,420
and maybe you've even
heard it was a UFO.
122
00:07:03,341 --> 00:07:05,757
A UFO? Can you imagine?
123
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,160
Do you want to know what it really was?
124
00:07:08,162 --> 00:07:09,827
A weather balloon.
125
00:07:09,829 --> 00:07:12,764
A common, everyday,
you've-seen-it-a-thousand-times
126
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,232
weather balloon.
127
00:07:14,234 --> 00:07:16,300
What is a weather balloon?
128
00:07:16,302 --> 00:07:18,169
It's a type of balloon.
129
00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:22,707
If it was just a balloon,
why is the OSS here?
130
00:07:22,709 --> 00:07:24,508
"Why is the CIA here?"
131
00:07:24,510 --> 00:07:27,179
What's that thing you're carrying?
132
00:07:27,181 --> 00:07:29,714
It's a tool for capturing
weather balloons.
133
00:07:29,716 --> 00:07:33,317
Now that I've answered all
your questions flawlessly,
134
00:07:33,319 --> 00:07:34,852
I have a question.
135
00:07:34,854 --> 00:07:38,190
Have you seen any suspicious
characters around?
136
00:07:38,192 --> 00:07:39,657
Suspicious how?
137
00:07:39,659 --> 00:07:42,660
Just suspicious.
Not an alien or anything,
138
00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:46,664
but maybe gray or green skin,
maybe tentacles.
139
00:07:46,666 --> 00:07:49,133
Assistance in finding someone like that
140
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:50,668
would be greatly appreciated.
141
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:55,539
And any resistance would
be greatly unappreciated.
142
00:07:55,541 --> 00:07:59,010
Mister, I know for a fact
that every one of us
143
00:07:59,012 --> 00:08:01,313
has seen a suspicious character...
144
00:08:03,217 --> 00:08:05,683
...in the mirror!
145
00:08:07,421 --> 00:08:11,089
Well, I'll leave you
to your joyless laughter.
146
00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:13,825
Is it only six of you for dinner?
147
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,293
You better believe it!
148
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:18,696
Then why are there seven plates?
149
00:08:23,369 --> 00:08:25,569
Do I hear the frightened whimpering
150
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:28,239
of a nasty little
weather balloon in there?
151
00:08:42,289 --> 00:08:43,688
Well, this didn't work.
152
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,690
I beg your pardon, madam.
153
00:08:45,692 --> 00:08:48,559
Wait, you think I'm a woman?
But I look ridiculous.
154
00:08:48,561 --> 00:08:50,829
I've seen more fetching women, sure,
155
00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:54,299
but you're no more homely than
your very homely twin sister
156
00:08:54,301 --> 00:08:56,301
I saw out in the dining room.
157
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:59,437
Because I look just
like Grandma Macadoo.
158
00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:02,040
Get out of my way!
Chipped beef, chipped beef!
159
00:09:02,604 --> 00:09:05,176
What in the twinly name
of Jacob and Esau!
160
00:09:05,178 --> 00:09:07,979
I'm back from the bathroom,
everybody, me,
161
00:09:07,981 --> 00:09:10,315
Grandma Macadoo's sister.
162
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:12,984
Grandma Macadoo?
163
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:15,786
Why did you all say there
were only six of you here?
164
00:09:15,788 --> 00:09:17,055
Oh, no!
165
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,524
They couldn't hear you over
the sound of your stomach
166
00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:20,992
smelling the chipped beef!
167
00:09:20,994 --> 00:09:22,093
I'll get you a bowl.
168
00:09:22,148 --> 00:09:24,795
The secret to chipped
beef is the creaminess,
169
00:09:24,797 --> 00:09:27,999
and the secret to my
creaminess is horse milk.
170
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:31,069
Sure, horse milk tastes like
grass and smells like a horse,
171
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:34,005
and cow milk is way better
in every way imaginable,
172
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:37,075
but I don't have a cow
and I do have a horse.
173
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:41,880
Or I did,
before I chipped it up and beefed it.
174
00:09:42,911 --> 00:09:45,616
It's like I'm looking in a mirror.
175
00:09:45,618 --> 00:09:48,086
Hobo? That's you, right?
176
00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:50,689
Somehow?
177
00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:54,693
One of the greatest acting
performances I've ever seen!
178
00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:57,696
You simply became Grandma Macadoo.
179
00:09:57,698 --> 00:10:01,165
What makes my disguise
so effective on humans?
180
00:10:02,012 --> 00:10:04,703
Well, it's time I came clean
about what I am...
181
00:10:04,705 --> 00:10:06,571
- A big ol' alien.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
182
00:10:06,573 --> 00:10:08,439
- Stop talking!
- No, no, no, not our business!
183
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,909
Let me explain something to you,
magical hobo.
184
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:14,178
We all came to the middle
of nowhere for a reason.
185
00:10:14,180 --> 00:10:16,114
We don't talk about the past
186
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:18,517
or who poisoned what daddy where
187
00:10:18,519 --> 00:10:21,185
or why the well water went smelly.
188
00:10:21,187 --> 00:10:23,388
And don't ask me about
stealing my airplane,
189
00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:25,323
which doomed my squadron.
190
00:10:25,325 --> 00:10:26,925
I'm always joking about what I did,
191
00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:29,060
but it really actually truly happened.
192
00:10:29,062 --> 00:10:30,729
I did it! I ate 'em!
193
00:10:30,731 --> 00:10:33,798
Can you, uh, do me like you did Granny?
194
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,667
I used to preach the good book.
Now I sell it!
195
00:10:37,988 --> 00:10:39,538
Do me!
196
00:10:39,540 --> 00:10:41,205
I'm a fresh young thing,
197
00:10:41,207 --> 00:10:43,742
and my gorgeous little face
looks like a river map.
198
00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:47,011
I want to become a star by
sitting here in the corner!
199
00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:48,413
Hey!
200
00:10:48,415 --> 00:10:51,149
It was brother against brother,
which was tough
201
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:54,819
because I didn't have a brother,
so I had to shoot my sister!
202
00:10:58,263 --> 00:11:01,426
I like to fart a big load
of dust onto some crops,
203
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:03,694
then go to town and pay a man and a lady
204
00:11:03,696 --> 00:11:05,830
to watch me have sex with my plane.
205
00:11:05,832 --> 00:11:08,833
Boy, this magical hobo was
listening to everything I said!
206
00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:10,635
Can you become anyone else?
207
00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:12,036
I don't know anyone else.
208
00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:14,773
What if we went into town,
met some other people?
209
00:11:14,775 --> 00:11:16,641
It's the Green Chile Festival!
210
00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:18,576
I should get going, actually.
211
00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:20,178
I have to find my spaceship's fuel core.
212
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:22,447
- La, la, la, la, la, la, la!
- Try this.
213
00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,783
Trust me.
214
00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:27,185
Phew.
215
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,788
Town. Chiles. Now.
216
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,027
What's that?
217
00:12:09,029 --> 00:12:11,162
Tent revival?
218
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:13,498
Is there something in
there I can put inside me
219
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:18,102
or put myself inside or maybe,
I don't know, rub on myself?
220
00:12:18,104 --> 00:12:22,641
I was there,
in the field, a man of clay,
221
00:12:22,643 --> 00:12:25,910
my heart and mind still mired
in the frantic decadence
222
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:28,579
and sin of this modern life.
223
00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:32,517
"Green Chili this," and "peepshow that,"
224
00:12:32,519 --> 00:12:37,856
when out of the sky it fell.
225
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:41,860
It exploded into the ground,
226
00:12:41,862 --> 00:12:44,262
and I went to it.
227
00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,931
My mind was made clear!
228
00:12:46,933 --> 00:12:49,800
My heart became full with the Lord!
229
00:12:49,802 --> 00:12:53,604
My hair became very easy to comb!
230
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:56,274
My teeth fell out and
landed on the ground
231
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,743
with a pretty little pitter-pat!
232
00:12:58,745 --> 00:13:02,813
And a voice whispered,
and I knew, I understood
233
00:13:02,815 --> 00:13:08,019
that it was a sacred
piece of Heaven's wall!
234
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,554
I must touch it!
235
00:13:12,359 --> 00:13:15,159
Only I may touch the relic!
236
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:16,361
Praise be!
237
00:13:17,192 --> 00:13:20,765
Now, we have all heard tell
of an alien in our midst,
238
00:13:20,767 --> 00:13:22,633
but I say to you this...
239
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,836
It is not an alien that has come to us
240
00:13:25,838 --> 00:13:28,639
- but an angel!
- Hallelujah!
241
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,775
Amen!
242
00:13:37,605 --> 00:13:39,117
Oh!
243
00:13:39,119 --> 00:13:42,721
Lord, thank you for this sacred chunk.
244
00:13:42,723 --> 00:13:47,258
Let no man sunder me
from my godly chunk.
245
00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:49,060
Ta-da! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
246
00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:52,463
It's me! It's me! The angel!
I'm here for that!
247
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,267
You don't look like an angel!
248
00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:58,803
Where are your wings?!
249
00:13:58,805 --> 00:14:01,472
I tuck 'em into my robes
when I'm not flying.
250
00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:03,608
- Where's your halo?
- Also tucked.
251
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:05,544
Most of these things
are for flying only,
252
00:14:05,546 --> 00:14:07,812
and it's immediate tuck-time on landing.
253
00:14:07,814 --> 00:14:10,549
Looks like she's
wearing a piece of the tent!
254
00:14:10,551 --> 00:14:13,151
- Can we see you fly?
- I'd rather not.
255
00:14:13,153 --> 00:14:16,154
Maybe I'll just shoot you, to be safe.
256
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,956
I saw him fly!
257
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:22,160
It was the most beautiful
thing I ever saw.
258
00:14:22,162 --> 00:14:24,763
It brought tears to these southern eyes.
259
00:14:24,765 --> 00:14:27,298
And as I looked upon that flying angel,
260
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:30,234
I said to myself, "be strong, Roslyn!
261
00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:33,972
Because whether it was poison or not,
Daddy is gone,
262
00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:36,240
and if you just sit on your tuffet,
263
00:14:36,242 --> 00:14:38,109
you'll never get to brush your hair
264
00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:40,178
- at the pink vanity of Hollywoodland."
- All right, that's plenty.
265
00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:42,847
- Huh?
- I'm the angel, is the main takeaway,
266
00:14:42,849 --> 00:14:45,650
and I'm here for that piece
of our beautiful wall.
267
00:14:45,652 --> 00:14:47,652
There's a big hole near the gate,
268
00:14:47,654 --> 00:14:50,054
and s-sinners are wiggling through.
269
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,123
Saint Peter's gate?
270
00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:53,324
Yep.
271
00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:55,259
It is an angel!
272
00:14:55,261 --> 00:14:56,995
I saw him fly, too!
273
00:14:56,997 --> 00:15:00,398
I think I saw him eat a big
cheeseburger across the street!
274
00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:05,937
Well, I guess I should be going,
275
00:15:05,939 --> 00:15:08,206
but God thanks you for your assistance!
276
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:10,675
Will we get into heaven for this?
277
00:15:10,677 --> 00:15:13,211
Boy, you guys sure
are excited about Heaven.
278
00:15:13,213 --> 00:15:14,679
What's it like?
279
00:15:14,681 --> 00:15:16,347
It's nice.
280
00:15:17,113 --> 00:15:19,217
It's very nice.
281
00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:24,823
Yeah, there's, like, the wall and...
and the gate, obviously.
282
00:15:24,825 --> 00:15:26,224
I already mentioned those.
283
00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:29,093
- What's inside the wall?
- Oh, it's got everything.
284
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:31,095
There's a-a tent just like this,
285
00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:34,499
and, um...
Oh, they've got green chilies.
286
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:37,568
As above, so below!
287
00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:39,504
Who wants a kiss from a real angel?
288
00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:41,683
Form a line!
289
00:15:42,662 --> 00:15:45,109
Kiss line canceled! Everyone, link arms
290
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:48,914
and form a heaven's wall here
on earth with your bodies!
291
00:15:48,973 --> 00:15:53,184
You should see a doctor,
tell him God said "radiation poisoning."
292
00:15:53,959 --> 00:15:54,585
Aah!
293
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:57,522
Looks like someone was
hoping to get back to heaven,
294
00:15:57,524 --> 00:16:01,192
but I'm afraid I'm going to
have to take you someplace...
295
00:16:01,194 --> 00:16:03,929
south of that.
296
00:16:08,902 --> 00:16:11,569
You're a clever one, gray man.
297
00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,504
But I'm a clever gray man, too.
298
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:16,107
I realized you were no angel.
299
00:16:16,109 --> 00:16:18,175
Because I didn't have the wings.
300
00:16:18,177 --> 00:16:21,979
Ha! I didn't know for sure
until you just confirmed it.
301
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:26,183
And now I'm taking you to a
new secret facility in Nevada.
302
00:16:26,185 --> 00:16:29,186
It's called Area 51... State-of-the-art.
303
00:16:29,188 --> 00:16:32,057
Makes Area 50 look like Area 49.
304
00:16:32,059 --> 00:16:34,659
- Will I like it there?
- Oh, you'll love it!
305
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:37,194
Unless you don't like
being dissected alive,
306
00:16:37,196 --> 00:16:38,996
in which case, you'll hate it.
307
00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,832
What's that? A weather balloon?
308
00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:45,070
No, it's a friend.
309
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:49,474
I can't see anything with all this safe
310
00:16:49,476 --> 00:16:51,810
and harmless crop dust!
311
00:16:53,212 --> 00:16:55,212
What the?!
312
00:16:57,665 --> 00:16:59,951
Great plan, gang.
313
00:16:59,953 --> 00:17:02,287
I mean, I almost died, but good plan.
314
00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:06,057
Good not great.
Now, where's our getaway car?
315
00:17:07,894 --> 00:17:09,961
Okay, this plan sucks, gang.
316
00:17:12,648 --> 00:17:15,433
This is all the getaway we need.
317
00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:18,636
I'm going to get you alien scum.
318
00:17:18,638 --> 00:17:20,972
Where is it?! I know it's one of you!
319
00:17:20,974 --> 00:17:22,173
We'll never tell!
320
00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:24,109
And you can't take all of us!
321
00:17:24,111 --> 00:17:25,643
I'm taking all of you.
322
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:27,112
A-kazza-kazza-whaaa?
323
00:17:27,114 --> 00:17:29,180
I don't know which one
of you is the alien.
324
00:17:29,182 --> 00:17:32,717
I mean, I feel pretty confident
it's one of the twins,
325
00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:35,987
but I'm taking you
all to Area 51 anyway.
326
00:17:35,989 --> 00:17:37,722
Uncle Cosworth, do something!
327
00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:41,226
One bull run special coming up!
328
00:17:42,129 --> 00:17:43,661
Okay that's not happening.
329
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:45,797
I can't let you take them.
330
00:17:45,799 --> 00:17:48,333
It's me. I'm the one you want.
331
00:17:48,335 --> 00:17:51,102
Don't say anything mean about my body.
332
00:17:53,807 --> 00:17:55,807
Hallelujah!
333
00:17:55,809 --> 00:17:59,477
I cracked that man! I daddied him!
334
00:17:59,479 --> 00:18:00,946
Clifton, I can't believe
335
00:18:00,948 --> 00:18:03,348
you were hiding behind
that cactus the whole time,
336
00:18:03,350 --> 00:18:05,984
especially since you're
also standing right there.
337
00:18:09,935 --> 00:18:12,357
Sweet mother of pearl!
338
00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:14,292
Kill me! Do it!
339
00:18:15,695 --> 00:18:17,428
I wronged you.
340
00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:20,231
I killed your,
I want to say, little lover?
341
00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:22,299
W-Was it a... Was it a sex friend?
342
00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:27,304
It was your young. I was afraid of that.
343
00:18:27,306 --> 00:18:30,708
But before you righteously murder me,
can I say something?
344
00:18:30,710 --> 00:18:32,377
You and me are a lot alike.
345
00:18:32,379 --> 00:18:35,913
Fellow travelers.
Strangers on a strange planet.
346
00:18:35,915 --> 00:18:38,449
A strange planet full of strange humans!
347
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:41,118
They do weird stuff. Like clapping.
348
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,921
They enjoy a thing so they
gather to look at the thing
349
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,790
and slap their hands together?
350
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:47,725
Big loud slappy clomps?
351
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:48,793
Dumb. In a way
352
00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:50,395
the computer was right.
353
00:18:50,397 --> 00:18:52,664
This planet has low potential.
354
00:18:52,666 --> 00:18:55,266
But then I got to thinking
about the green chili pepper.
355
00:18:55,268 --> 00:18:59,604
Full of high quantities of capsaicin,
which is a poison.
356
00:18:59,606 --> 00:19:00,938
But what you can't tell
357
00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:03,074
from your scanning tripod on the moon,
358
00:19:03,076 --> 00:19:06,878
is that this poison is also
really spicy and flavorful.
359
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,681
Get where I'm going with this?
360
00:19:09,683 --> 00:19:10,882
The people!
361
00:19:10,884 --> 00:19:12,817
They're like the green chili peppers.
362
00:19:12,819 --> 00:19:15,486
The things inside them that
they think are poison...
363
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:18,089
their dark secrets and
their troubled pasts...
364
00:19:18,091 --> 00:19:21,193
just make them spicy and flavorful.
365
00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:26,431
I told you we were a lot alike.
366
00:19:27,634 --> 00:19:29,868
He's waking up. That's my cue!
367
00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:34,139
Heh-heh-heh.
368
00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:40,245
Tell everyone what you saw
here today if you want.
369
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:42,848
Who would ever believe you?
370
00:19:47,585 --> 00:19:49,921
_
371
00:19:49,922 --> 00:19:52,047
_
372
00:19:54,394 --> 00:19:56,061
He...
373
00:19:56,063 --> 00:19:57,662
He didn't say goodbye.
374
00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:59,931
To keep you safe, my friends.
375
00:19:59,933 --> 00:20:01,799
I don't want you to know too much.
376
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:03,869
Do you think he was the alien
377
00:20:03,871 --> 00:20:05,537
the government was looking for?
378
00:20:05,539 --> 00:20:08,205
Hmm, maybe they don't know enough.
379
00:20:26,693 --> 00:20:31,228
And so Roger sets off
to travel this new world,
380
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:34,031
seeking only his pleasure and amusement,
381
00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:36,233
perhaps righting a wrong if he has time
382
00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:37,635
and it's not a big hassle.
383
00:20:38,251 --> 00:20:42,039
All the while being pursued
by an Intelligence agent,
384
00:20:42,041 --> 00:20:43,708
his smart-alecky bald son,
385
00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:48,045
and a vengeful shape-shifting
alien who seeks to destroy him.
386
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:50,181
His date with destiny
and the Smith family
387
00:20:50,183 --> 00:20:53,985
still decades in front of him, he is...
388
00:20:53,987 --> 00:20:55,386
the Fellow Traveler.
389
00:20:55,388 --> 00:20:58,523
And these are his stories.
390
00:20:58,525 --> 00:21:00,492
Bye. Have a great time.
391
00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:04,037
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
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