Original subtitles

Previously on Young Sheldon...

Your friends all know about your secret boyfriend ?

-You think that's you? -It's not?

I understand you're moving forward with Sheldon's grant database.

-I was an intrinsec part of that. - Sheldon didn't mention you.

Of course he didn't! That little credit hog!

We're looking for a financeer, no a partner.

I just wanna be around the process.

But I'm still in charge, right?

-Did NASA fake the moon landing? -No.

See that's what I thought till about a year ago.

Oh we're gonna have so much fun!

The data comes in here, where it's divided into three tables -

I'm calling them X-sub-1, X-sub-2, X-sub-3.

Good, good.

And then over here, it's subjected to data normalization,

so we don't end up with any duplicate data fields.

I've got it.

-Grant Daddy. -What?

The name of our company -- Grant Daddy.

It's sexy, sophisticated, but John Q Lunch Pail can wrap his arms around it.

Where are you?

My lawyers have advised me not to say,

but I'm sure I'll be allowed back in the country very soon.

Taxes, am I right?

We have more important things to focus on than the name,

like how are we going to build this.

Grant-opolis!

Grant-cano! No wait,

The Grant Canyon!

That's gonna look great on a shirt. What size you guys wear?

This is not helpful! Can't I hang up on him?

Sheldon, I'll remind you Mr. O'Brien is funding the entire project,

so he should remain included.

Fine.

The Grant Canyon is a terrible name. It sounds like a place grants go to die.

-Sheldon. -I'm including him!

YOUNG SHELDON

-How have you been feeling? -Fat and disgusting.

I meant are you having any discomfort, fatigue?

Yeah, that's all I have.

I think she's sayin' she feels eight months pregnant.

Eight, eight hundred...

Hey, sorry I'm late.

Just a reminder Doc, I don't wanna know if it's a boy or a girl.

-I want it to be a surprise. -Hold up.

If we're all here, who's watchin' the laundromat

and the video store and the other... establishment?

-Oh, the gambling room? -Huh?

It's okay, I lost a hundred bucks there last week.

Oh. So you know we're good for the bill.

So back to me --

how's everything looking in the oven?

Baby seems good, but I am concerned about your blood pressure.

-You think it's pre-eclampsia? -Georgie, let the doctor talk.

Actually, it's a possibility.

I read the book, did you?

I'd like to put you on bed rest for a week and then re-check you.

-Is that really necessary? -It is.

Dr. Linkletter, I had a question about today's--

-I'm sorry, who are you? -You must be Sheldon.

I am.

-I was told not to talk to you. -Why not?

I was told not to tell you that.

Ah I see you've met Toby.

I have not. He wouldn't tell me his name.

Good man.

What can I help you with, Sheldon?

What is all this?

It looks like algorithms for a searchable database.

At a glance anything can look like an algorithm for a searchable database.

Very well, then it's an algorithm for a searchable database.

-But that was my idea. -If you'll recall it was our idea.

Are you programming a database for him?

-Go ahead. -Yeah.

Yeah.

How dare you steal my grant database idea!

Look, Dr. Linkletter was a part of the idea,

he is an employee of the university,

therefore we have a legitimate claim to it.

But I'm making one. I have an investor lined up and everything.

Well you're still welcome to join us and we can all do this together.

No, this was my idea and I'm doing it on my own.

I guess we'll see who gets to market first.

I guess we will.

-Have you already started programming? -No.

Do you have access to a mainframe?

That depends. Can I use the university's mainframe?

-No. -Then we're still working on it.

-I see. -Well we already have a name, do you?

As a matter of fact we do. We're calling it "Granted."

-Ugh that's such a good name. -Thank you, what's yours?

Never mind!

Look what your machine did to my underwear.

-Made 'em huge? -No it dyed 'em pink.

Oh right, sorry - here next wash is on us.

I gotta go check on something in the back.

Sorry, a little short-staffed today.

I been runnin' around like a chicken with the head cut off.

Alright...

Here's your teddy bear, here's your cash.

Teddy bear, cash.

Teddy bear...

Hey, this is a dry cleaning ticket, get outta here.

Hang on, I'll be right back.

-Hey, you findin' everything okay? -Yeah.

That there's a real good one, you should get it.

-I dunno. -Don't know?

Whoopi Goldberg as a singin' nun, what's there to think about?

I might be in the mood for action.

She's on the run from the mob, you'll love it, I'll ring you up.

How ya doin'?

I'm lying in bed and a nice lady just brought me food -- it's not the worst.

Well, you haven't tasted the food yet. Doctor said no salt.

-I'm sure it's great. -I tasted it, it sucks.

I should go give Georgie a hand.

Here's the telephone, do you need anything before I go?

Actually I can't find the remote.

Well it couldn't have gone far.

Let's see. Let me just look down here...

OK, here it is.

Oh, my back!

-You okay? -No!

I'll help you up.

No, I'm fine. I just need to lie here a minute.

You want me to get ice or something?

No, you're supposed to stay in bed.

I know, but you look like the "I've fallen and I can't get up" lady.

That's because I've fallen and I can't get up.

Oh it hurts when I laugh.

-Here honey. There you go. -Thanks.

Oh dear Lord, let me help you up!

Don't touch me! I'll get up when I'm ready.

Should I call the doctor?

No this happens sometimes.

I just need to take it easy for a few days and I'll be fine.

Well do you want a pillow?

A pillow sounds nice.

Here.

And what's goin' on with you?

High blood pressure -- doctor wants me on bed rest.

Probably worried about pre-eclampsia.

Did everyone read this book?

Well, I can take off work and look after y'all.

We're fine.

Fine? You're on the floor. What happens if you need to use the bathroom?

-Depends. -Depends on what?

No, it's a joke.

I got it.

What's the joke?!

Tell me!

Hello, Mr. O'Brien's office.

Is Mr. O'Brien there? This is John Sturgis and Sheldon Cooper.

Oh, it's me -- just making sure you weren't the IRS. What's up?

I have troubling news. The university is making a competing grant database.

Wasn't it your idea?

It was, but Dr. Linkletter is claiming he assisted me.

There's nothing wrong with a little competition.

You think I was the only person designing anti-static lab furniture?

-You weren't? -No!

I researched the competition, I outbid their manufacturers,

and tied them up in court so long they ran out of money.

That seems a little ruthless.

Hey... If you're not ruthless, you're toothless.

-I like that. -I know, it rhymes.

But the university's already ahead of us -

Yeah, but do they have a cool company name?

Yes. They're calling it "Granted."

Dammit, it was right there.

Okay, I can't cover the video store, the laundromat and the other room

all at the same time.

-I wanna work in the poker room. -You're not workin' in the other room.

I got the other room.

I call dibs on video store!

-I wanted video store. -Too bad, I called dibs.

Great, you got the laundromat.

But I don't want the laundromat.

Dibs are dibs -- she called it.

-He's a good boss. -That's right.

Slow...

-Slow. -Any slower and we're just standin'.

I got this, OK? Just leave me alone.

Alright, I'm gonna check on Mandy.

Slow.

Hey. You doin' okay?

I'm fine, you really don't need to fuss over me.

Oh, I don't mind.

Appreciate that, but I'm used to taking care of myself.

That's what family's for.

Speakin' of which -- do you want me to call yours?

Why?

I would wanna know if my daughter was on bed rest.

If they wanna know how I'm doin' they can pick up the phone and call me.

I'm sure if your mom knew what was goin' on she would be here to help.

Well I told her I was pregnant and she stopped talking to me so...

-I know but-- -It's not your business, Mary.

Okay, sorry.

-Hello, Toby. -I'm not supposed to talk to you.

-But no one told you not to talk to me. -What do you want?

-We'd like to offer you a job. -And for you to wash your hands.

I already have a job.

We know -- we want you to do the same thing, but for more money.

Okay.

Really, that's all it took? Where's the loyalty?

Sheldon, this is what we want.

I know, but what if someone else offers him more money -

is he just gonna leave us?

-Are you? -Probably.

We can hire him, but he does not get to go to the bathroom alone.

Welcome aboard.

Let's hit that sink!

If you're looking for something to watch I'd recommend Princess Bride.

-Really? -I know it sounds a little girly...

But there's an awesome sword fight and Andre the Giant's in it.

-Cool, thanks. -Just doing my job.

I'm Melissa, by the way.

You need any help over here?

Are you trying to touch my underwear?

-No, ma'am. -Well then step away.

Yes, ma'am.

I knew it! You poached my programmer.

You poached his idea!

Toby, what happened to loyalty?

It's annoying isn't it.

There's an old saying, "You mess with the bull, you get the horns."

There's a new saying, "We have a programmer and you don't."

Yeah!

Really? You poached our programmer?

I left him alone for five minutes to use the bathroom!

Why are you all surprised? I'm told business is a high-stakes game

where if you're not ruthless, you're toothless.

We just learned that.

You could have hired anyone else.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda.

You wanna play hardball? We can do that too.

See, Sheldon gets a lotta perks at this university that can go away real fast.

But I like my perks.

How'd you like a roommate or two in that dorm room of yours?

-We should give her what she wants. -Stay strong.

I'm just saying you need us as much as we need you.

For example, we have a mainframe computer and you don't.

Ha! No mainframe, no database. Who's toothless now!

We can get our own mainframe.

We can? They're really expensive.

I'm trying to be ruthless, work with me.

We can!

WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING

Hey, brought you a snack and some magazines.

Thanks, but I should probably finish reading this.

Although I do know how it ends. With bodily fluids everywhere.

And then a sweet little boy or girl.

It's a girl.

Really?

Yeah, Georgie didn't want to know so I haven't said.

Well that's wonderful! It'll be our little secret.

I already know! So don't go feelin' like you're special.

Do you mind?! We're havin' a moment here!

Carry on.

As you can see the mother/daughter bond is strong.

Compared to me and my mom, you two are magic.

Well we've had our ups and downs.

She wasn't the easiest mom to grow up with.

Sometimes I kinda felt like I raised myself.

But now we're practically best friends.

I don't think that's in the cards for me and my mom.

I hear you whisperin' in there! Don't listen to her, Mandy!

Dear Lord, I was just tellin' her you and I are best friends!

That's how you talk to your best friend?

Everything OK with ya?

I heard about you -- you're the panty sniffer.

No! There was no sniffing!

Barbara, he's doing it again!

No, no... Alright I'm out.

I'm totally into old movies, y'know

-- Breakfast Club, Goonies, Pretty in Pink.

Hey, how's it goin'?

Fine. Bye.

Not much goin' on in the laundromat, thought maybe I could lend you a hand.

Nope, all good. Go check on Georgie.

Alright.

So you doing anything later?

Yeah, she's goin' home with her father.

Dad!

Sorry, sir, I didn't know.

Did you know she's in seventh grade?

-Dad! -I thought she was older.

Well now you know. Beat it.

Right.

-Are you happy? -He's way too old for you.

Have you seen you and Mom?

Hey! Your mother and I were high school sweethearts!

She was in high school, you were like twenty-five.

People looked older back then!

Hello?

Yeah, I'm here to install some bunk beds.

But I don't need bunk beds, I'm only one person.

All I know is they're turning this room into a triple.

Triple?

It's getting serious, they're playing hardball.

And hardball is just one more type of ball I'm bad at!

Alright, calm down, I'm sure I can find a used mainframe.

Where? How? From who?

I don't know, Jupiter just entered Sagittarius so I have a good feeling.

You're not filling me with confidence, Gary!

You teenagers, always so angsty -

I love it.

Hi Mom, it's me...

No, nothing's wrong, I just wanted to talk...

No, I'm not calling to apologize.

No, I don't need money.

I don't need anything from you...

Y'know what, this was a mistake. Goodbye.

Hi welcome to Video Village,

I'm Missy, I'm in seventh grade and that's my father.

Um, I'm Carl, I'm thirty-one. My dad's dead.

I'm sorry about her, and your dad.

What are you doing?

Saving you the trouble of embarrassing me.

Look, it's just not easy seein' you talkin' to guys.

Especially older guys.

I'll tell you what's not easy - hearing from Billy Sparks

about you and his mother hanging out in their chicken coop.

What?

He said he saw y'all coming out of there the other day.

-We were talkin' chickens. -And he said it wasn't the first time.

They got a lot of chickens.

Now there's bunk beds in my room. It's like summer camp -- two words I loathe.

Sometimes roommates become lifelong friends.

I still exchange letters with my roommate from the mental hospital.

They're in a language he made up, but it's nice to know he cares.

I have a delivery for Sheldon Cooper.

That's me. What is it?

-A computer mainframe. -He got one.

I just need to tell the guys where to put it.

I suppose it could go in here.

Or I think I have a solution to my roommate problem.

I can't have roommates if my dorm has no room for those mates.

Right this way.

So ya know, Brenda and I are just friends.

She's been goin' through a rough patch and needed someone to talk to.

-Okay. -Good.

Why'd you say it was about chickens?

Because it's Brenda's personal business

and I'm tryin' to be a good neighbor.

And she doesn't want Billy to worry so we used the chicken coop...

which all makes sense, right?

-I guess. -Good.

I'm glad we can talk about these things.

Me too. Someday we'll talk about Mom and Pastor Rob.

Excuse me, are you Mrs. McAllister?

I am. Can I help you?

I'm Mary Cooper. Georgie's mom.

Oh. Hello.

I don't know what's goin' on between you and your daughter, but

you need to get over it.

She's pregnant, she's scared and she needs her mother.

I'm getting parenting advice from the woman whose seventeen-year-old son

got my daughter pregnant?

Yeah, you are. Georgie messed up, but I didn't cut him out of my life.

-Well, you don't know-- -I don't care!

You're her parent, act like it.

So grow up, call your daughter and make it right. Now.

-I need-- -I said now!

I was gonna say I need the phone number.

Okay. Do you have a pen?

Alright, plug it in.

Hello.

Unbelievable.

President Hagemeyer, have you come to meet my new roommate?

VAX six-thousand?

Sheldon, you can't have a mainframe in your dorm.

Actually there's no rule against it. I can't have a candle, a microwave,

a hot plate, a coffeemaker, a toaster, or a waterbed.

But there's nothing about a mainframe.

Well I'm the president of the university and I'm saying you can't.

You're just trying to sabotage our project

because you know we're going to beat you to market.

Sheldon, plug it in.

There really should be a rule against this.