Original subtitles

[MUSIC PLAYING]

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

HUH. THIS IS INTERESTING.

"WIFE OF BRAK'S DAD TO SPEND TWO WEEKS AT EXCLUSIVE SPA RESORT.

I JUST NEEDED A DADGUM BREAK, SHE EXPLAINED."

ISN'T THAT AN INTERESTING STORY, MOTHER?

I'M NOT MOM, DAD. I'M BRAK, YOUR SON.

OH, UH, RIGHT. OH, LOOK AT THIS.

ALL EXPENSES PAID?

THAT FITS MY BUDGET PERFECTLY.

I'M GONNA ENTER THAT CONTEST AND WIN IT.

BRAK, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO RAP.

♪ DADDY DON'T KNOW ABOUT MY RAPPIN' ABILITY ♪

♪ WHAT YOU GOT IS FUTILITY ♪

FUTILITY!

♪ TIME OUT, DAD, THAT'S A MEAN THING TO SAY ♪

♪ HEY, YOU WANT TO BE A RAPPER, GOT TO PLAY THAT WAY ♪

♪ YOU GOT TO ROLL LARGELY AND ARRIVE CORRECT ♪

♪ I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR, DAD, IN FULL EFFECT ♪

♪ CHECK ME OUT, MY NAME IS BRAK ♪

♪ AND THAT'S A FACT

♪ I GOT A MOM AND A DAD AND THE YARD OUT BACK ♪

♪ WE SIT BY THE POOL AND WE NIBBLE ON SNACKS ♪

♪ THEN WE EAT A BIG LUNCH, AND WE ALL TAKE NAPS ♪

♪ WE DON'T HAVE A POOL, BRAK, BUT DON'T YOU KNOW THE SCORE? ♪

♪ I HAVEN'T BEEN EMPLOYED SINCE 1984 ♪

♪ I THOUGHT WE HAD A POOL, WHAT'S THAT HOLE OUT BACK? ♪

♪ JUST A WATER-FILLED CRATER FROM AN ALIEN ATTACK ♪

♪ I STILL GOT A DREAM, DAD, AND IT'S THE BEST ♪

♪ I'M GONNA BE THE WINNER OF THE RAP CONTEST ♪

♪ JIGGA WHO? A-JIGGA WHAT? ♪

♪ A-JIGGA ME, A-JIGGA YOU ♪

HOW'D THAT FLAVOR TASTE GOING DOWN, DADDY MAN?

BRAK, I'D LIKE TO WISH YOU ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD,

BUT RIGHT NOW I NEED TO GET DOWN TO THE BATCAVE AND SEE WHAT ALBERT WANTS.

YOU GO DO THAT, DADDY.

I'M GONNA GO DOWN TO THE RAP STORE

AND CHECK OUT THE COMPETITION.

♪ WELL, HERE I AM WALKING DOWN THE STREET ♪

♪ HEY, LOOK DOWN THERE, I CAN SEE MY FEET ♪

♪ I GAVE THEM BOTH NAMES, ONE'S TONY, ONE'S LOU ♪

♪ YOU STEPPIN' ON TONY, LOU'S STEPPIN' ON YOU ♪

♪ SO I'M WALKING DOWN THE STREET, OR SHOULD I SAY ♪

♪ ON THE SIDEWALK? THE STREETS ARE NOT SAFE ♪

♪ THERE'S CARS AND BUSES AND TRICKED OUT SCOOTERS ♪

♪ AND THE KIND I LIKE BEST ♪

♪ ARE TRICKED OUT SCOOTERS ♪

Meatwad: YAY!

HEY, ZORAK.

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE BIG RAP CONTEST AT THE HIGH SCHOOL?

I HEAR IT'S THE SHIZNIT.

EH, BUNCH OF HACKS. THOSE JERKS COULDN'T RAP A FRIGGING SANDWICH.

♪ CRAP RAPPERS, EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM ♪

♪ AIN'T GOT NO CHOICE BUT TO MAKE FUN OF THEM ♪

♪ IT'S ALL JUST AN ACT, MAN, THOSE GANGSTERS IS POSIN' ♪

♪ SURE, THEY GOT ICE, BUT THAT'S JUST WATER THAT'S FROZEN ♪

♪ I'LL GO ON FURTHER, CALL ME THE CRAP HERDER ♪

♪ 'CAUSE IT'S NOT JUST RAP THAT'S CRAP ♪

♪ IT'S ALL MUSIC, IN FACT ♪

♪ YOU KNOW, WHILE WE'RE AT IT, THROW IN CREATIVE EXPRESSION ♪

♪ MAKES ME WANT TO BLAST THEM INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION ♪

ZORAK, AREN'T YOU BEING JUST A WEE BIT HARSH?

♪ IF I WAS THE BOSS, I'D ENSLAVE ALL OF Y'ALL ♪

♪ I WOULDN'T THINK TWICE, I'D EXTERMINATE ALL LIFE ♪

♪ LEAVING JUST THE LADY TYPES ♪

♪ THAT TREAT A MANTIS RIGHT ♪

♪ I'M TALKING STACKED RACKS AND A MOUTH THAT'S SHUT TIGHT ♪

♪ SCREW THAT!

♪ THE GIRLIES GOT TO GO, I DON'T LOVE THEM HOS ♪

♪ I'M SO OUT THE DO'

♪ FOR SHO'

BWAH HA HA HA!

D'OH! I DIDN'T KNOW ZORAK COULD DO THAT.

THERE'S A LOT YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME. HA HA HA!

REALLY? LIKE WHAT ELSE?

I'M 40 YEARS OLD!

BWAH HA HA HA!

WELL, THAT SURE CAME OUT OF LEFT FIELD.

OH! WHEW!

COME ON, FEET.

LET'S GET TO STEPPING.

[HUMMING]

WELCOME TO STICKY'S BEAT SHACK.

HOW MAY I FLIP YOUR LID? HA HA HA!

OH, WELL, I'M JUST HERE TO, YOU KNOW, HANG OUT,

SEE WHAT'S UP WITH THE COMPETITION.

OH, I'D FORGET ABOUT THAT.

THE BEST RAPPER WHAT EVER WAS

IS COMING BACK TO TOWN TO BREAK IT DOWN.

I'M TALKING ABOUT PRIME CUT MIGGITY MO

MACK DADDY JIZZABANG DOGGY DOGG DOGG. HA HA!

NEVER HEARD OF HIM.

ARE YOU SUGGESTING HE'S AS TALENTED AS ME?

I FIND THAT HARD AND DIFFICULT

AND HARD TO BELIEVE.

LOOK, SHORTY.

EVERYBODY THINKS THEY PIMP.

NOT THE CASE. THEY JUST FRONTING.

♪ NO MATTER HOW YOU FLOW, HE'LL LET YOU KNOW, DAWG ♪

♪ IF I WERE YOU, I'D JUST GO HOME, DAWG ♪

♪ PRIME CUT MIGGITY MO MACK-DADDY JIZZABANG DOGGY DOGG DOGG ♪

♪ GOT A TWO-WAY 24 GRILL TO GO ♪

♪ PHAT CRIB WITH A BARBER'S POLE ♪

♪ THINK YOU GOT GAME? THINK AGAIN, YOU KNOW ♪

♪ HEADS UP, YOU'LL END UP WITH A TAG ON YOUR TOE, YO ♪

♪ WHAT THE WHO'S-A-WHAT? WHAT'D YOU SAY TO ME? ♪

♪ GO ON, DAWG

♪ WHAT'D YOU SAY TO ME? ♪

OK. YOU WANT ME TO SLOW IT DOWN FOR YOU?

I HEAR YOU.

♪ THE MAN'S UNDEFEATED, THAT'S THE STONE COLD TRUTH ♪

♪ HE'S NOT KICKING YOUR ASS, THEN HE'S KNOCKING THE BOOTS ♪

♪ HE'S COUNTING TO 10, I SAY, HE'S ROCKING THE BLUES ♪

♪ IT'S A GAME, ALL RIGHT, AND YOU STAND TO LOSE ♪

MY GOOD MAN, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW

THAT LOSING IS NOT IN MY VOCABULARY,

BUT NEITHER IS PHLOSSYNASYNIA PURIFICATION.

AW, MAN.

I THINK I MIGHT HAVE A PROBLEM.

MAN, OH, MAN, OH, MAN, OH, MAN,

OH, MAN, OH, MAN.

WHAT TROUBLES YOU, NEIGHBORHOOD BRAK?

WELL, YOU SEE, I WAS GONNA ENTER THIS BIG CONTEST AND WIN

BECAUSE I THOUGHT I WAS BORN TO WIN,

BUT IT TURNS OUT I'M BORN TO LOSE.

MY BIRTH CERTIFICATE WAS A COMPLETE SHAM!

THE HOSPITAL HOODWINKED ME!

WHERE IS THIS EVIL HOSPITAL? I WILL DESTROY IT!

NO. DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON THEM. IT'S NOT THEIR FAULT.

THEN WHOSE FAULT IS IT?

OH, IT'S JUST THIS SUPER-HARD-CORE AWESOME RAPPER.

AAAH! I WILL DESTROY HIM!

AWAY!

I'LL NEED HIS COORDINATES.

HOW CAN I LAUNCH AN OFFENSIVE WITHOUT THE COORDINATES?!

OH, WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU, THUNDERCRANKY? HA HA HA!

I'M ON EDGE.

I HAVEN'T BEEN IN A BATTLE FOR WEEKS.

I LONG FOR THE TASTE OF WAR.

♪ WAR IS MY PROFESSION, WAR IS MY OBSESSION ♪

♪ NOTHING I LIKE BETTER THAN A VIOLENT INTERCESSION ♪

♪ BLOOD MUST BE SPILLED, THICK ENOUGH TO SWIM IN ♪

♪ AS I HEAR THE LAMENTATIONS OF MY CONQUERED FOE'S WOMEN ♪

♪ WAR, IT'S GOOD FOR ME ♪

♪ WHAT'S MY NAME? ♪

♪ WAR, IT'S GOOD FOR ME ♪

♪ WHAT'S MY NAME? ♪

[TURNTABLE SCRATCHING]

YOU WANT A BATTLE? TAKE THIS!

[TURNTABLE SCRATCHING]

♪ IT'S COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT YOU HAVE NO AGGRESSION ♪

♪ NO TIME FOR SECOND-GUESSIN' ♪

♪ YOU NEED A SECRET WEAPON ♪

AWAY!

[WEAPONS FIRE]

[EXPLOSIONS]

OH, ISN'T THAT NICE? THUNDERCLEESE HAS FOUND HIMSELF A BATTLE.

Thundercleese: AAH!

IT'S LIKE I ALWAYS SAY, LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS...

YOU BLOW THOSE LEMONS TO BITS WITH YOUR LASER CANNONS!

[DOOR CLOSES]

DAD?

[SNIFFLES] M-MOTHER, IS THAT YOU?

NO. IT'S ME, YOUR SON BRAK.

WHY ARE YOU SITTING IN THE DARK?

BECAUSE THE LIGHTS ARE OFF.

[SNIFFLES]

DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE SWITCH IS LOCATED?

YEAH. YOU WANT ME TO TURN IT ON FOR YOU?

NO! I WANT MOTHER TO TURN IT ON. SHE HAS SUCH A FLAIR.

JUST A SIMPLE FLIP OF HER DAINTY WRIST,

AND LIGHT IS EVERYWHERE,

BUT NOW THERE IS ONLY DARKNESS.

GOSH, DAD. SHE'S ONLY ON VACATION.

I'M TURNING THESE LIGHTS ON.

OHH!

[WHIMPERS]

OHH!

AAH!

AY!

[MOANS]

HA HA HA!

AHH. OK.

WELL, I'M GONNA GO UPSTAIRS

AND TRY AND THINK OF A SECRET WEAPON.

OK, SON,

AND LET ME KNOW IF THERE'S ANYTHING I CAN DO TO HELP.

Narrator: LATER THAT NIGHT AT THE RAP CONTEST...

[MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ MY NAME IS CLARENCE, AND THAT'S NO LIE ♪

♪ IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME, ASK MY MOM ♪

♪ SHE'S OVER THERE WITH THAT MAN SHE MAKES ME CALL DAD ♪

♪ BUT HE'S NOT MY DAD, THAT'S GARY ♪

♪ MY REAL DAD RAN AWAY

♪ OH, DADDY, WHAT DID I DO TO MAKE YOU NOT LOVE ME? ♪

♪ IS IT MY OBESITY?

♪ IS IT BECAUSE I LOVE THE THEATER? ♪

♪ WHY? WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME WITH GARY? ♪

MOM! MOMMY!

[CROWD BOOING]

THANK YOU, CLARENCE.

NEXT CONTESTANT IS MERLIN.

Merlin: HERE'S ONE FOR THE WIZARDS IN THE CAZZASTLE.

LISTEN WHILE I DROP SOME MAGIC ON YOUR HEINIES.

♪ ALL THE WIZARDS IN THE HOUSE, SAY "YO" ♪

♪ PUT A 40 IN YOUR GOBLET, LET IT FLOW ♪

♪ GIVES SOME PINCHES TO YOUR WENCHES DOWN LOW ♪

♪ TAKE OUT YOUR CRYSTAL BALL, LET IT GLOW, WHAT'S IT SHOW? ♪

♪ PUT YOUR STAFFS IN THE AIR LIKE YOU JUST DON'T CARE ♪

♪ AND SAY "YO"

♪ YO

♪ YO!

YOOOOOOO!

[BOOING]

M.C.: MERLIN!

NEXT CONTESTANT IS BRAK.

Zorak: JERK!

GREETINGS, ALL YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE.

MY NAME IS BRAK, AS YOU'LL SOON DISCOVER.

♪ WELL, IT'S BRAK, Y'ALL, GET BACK, Y'ALL ♪

♪ FROM THE FRONT ROW TO THE BACK WALL ♪

♪ I GET ALL THE PEOPLE'S TOES A-TAPPIN' ♪

♪ THANKS TO MY RAPPIN', IT'S NOT HAPPENSTANCE ♪

♪ JUST DANCE, JUST JUMP

♪ GET ON THE FLOOR AND SHAKE THAT BIG OL' RUMP ♪

♪ JUST DANCE, JUST JUMP

♪ GET ON THE FLOOR AND SHAKE THAT BIG OL' RUMP ♪

♪ SHAKE THAT BUTT, SHAKE THAT BOTTOM ♪

♪ SHAKE THAT HEINIE HEINDER

♪ AND ALL THAT STUFF THAT YOU SHAKE BEHIND YOU ♪

DO THE SHAKIN' THE BUTT!

WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP?

M.C.: CONGRATULATIONS, BRAK!

Zorak: JERK!

AND NOW THE FINAL CONTESTANT IS

PRIME CUT MIGGITY MO MACK-DADDY JIZZABANG DOGGY DOGG DOGG.

HEY, MAN. CHECK THIS OUT.

♪ I'M PRIME, DOP DOO DOP DOO WAH ♪

♪ CUT, WAH KOO KOO KOO WAH KAH ♪

♪ MIGGITY MO MACK-DADDY, WHAT'S UP? ♪

♪ I SAID, A-JIZZABANG, BOOM BOOM BOOM ♪

♪ DIGGITY DOGG

♪ I SAID, A-DOGG A-DOGG A DIGGITY DOGG ♪

♪ FALL TO YOUR KNEES, PLEASE, BREATHE DEEP ♪

♪ AND WATCH THE REAPER REAP

♪ FORGET CHILLIN' OUT, YOU REALLY NEED THE DEEP FREEZE ♪

♪ THE ONLY WAY THE MIKE CHANGED ♪

♪ IS THAT YOU COVERED IT WITH STINK ♪

♪ IT'S TIME TO SAY GOOD-BYE 'CAUSE YOU'RE CLEARLY THE WEAKEST LINK ♪

♪ BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME, BUD, 'CAUSE YOU'RE BETTER OFF DEAD ♪

♪ LET'S CALL IT CURTAINS LIKE WHATEVER THE HELL'S ON YOUR HEAD ♪

♪ CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE LOOK ON YOUR LIPLESS FACE ♪

♪ WHEN I RAP YOUR PUNK ASS RIGHT OUT OF THIS PLACE ♪

♪ MY NAME IS PRIME CUT

♪ YOU AIN'T GOT NO RHYME ♪

♪ YOU GONNA LOSE BIG TIME ♪

♪ DON'T YOU HEAR?

♪ 'CAUSE NO M.C. HAS EVER SURVIVED ♪

♪ THAT WENT UP AGAINST PRIME ♪

♪ PRIME

TELL IT, PRIME.

YOU'RE UNDISPUTED OR UNDEFEATED, BABY.

THAT'S RIGHT, SUCKER.

♪ PRIME, I MUST ADMIT ♪

♪ THAT WAS PRETTY ROOTIN'-TOOTIN' ♪

♪ YOUR RIP-ROARIN' RAPPING GAVE MY BRAK BUTT A BOOTIN' ♪

♪ LIKE A SOAP THAT'S ON A ROPE ♪

♪ I'M FEELING HUNG UP IN THE SHOWER ♪

♪ IF I HAD A WATCH, IT'D SAY, THIS WOULD BE MY FINAL HOUR ♪

[SOBS]

[SNORT]

WAAAH.

DID SOMEBODY ORDER A SECRET WEAPON?

SAY WHAT? SAY WHAT? SAY WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?

♪ HEY, DAD, FANCY SEEING YOU UP HERE ON THE STAGE ♪

♪ YOU THINK THAT YOU CAN BREAK IT DOWN REGARDLESS OF AGE? ♪

♪ THIS PARTY NEEDED GOOD OLD DAD TO COME IN AND SURPRISE IT ♪

♪ I'M GONNA BREAK IT DOWN SO THAT IT'S MOM WON'T RECOGNIZE IT ♪

[PANTING RHYTHMICALLY]

[PPFT PPFT PPFT]

[IMITATES SCRATCHING]

[PANTING RHYTHMICALLY]

♪ DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD ♪

♪ DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD, DAD ♪

IS THAT BROKEN ENOUGH FOR YOU?

HE'S STILL STANDING, DADDY.

NOT FOR LONG.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

♪ HIBBY DIBBY DIBBY HUBBY YIBBY HO ♪

♪ HABBY DABBY HABBY DABBA HIBBY YABBA HO ♪

[PANTING RHYTHMICALLY]

[INHALES DEEPLY]

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] ♪ HUMMINABBA SAY VITAMA FOO

[LOW-PITCHED VOICE] ♪ HABBA DABBA BLAH GO BLAVINIVA FO ♪

[HIGH-PITCH] ♪ HA GO LIBINA VIS OH DEE

[LOW-PITCH] ♪ HA GO LIBINA SONNA GIMMA YA

♪ HIBBY DIBBY DIBBY DIBBA HUBBY DIBBY HO BI ♪

♪ HIBBY DIBBY DUBBA DUBBA HUBBY DIBBY HO ♪

HA HA HA!

THE WINNER IS BRAK...

Zorak: JERK!

M.C.: AND HIS DAD!

WELL, DAD, YOU CERTAINLY CAME THROUGH IN A PINCH.

[GURGLING]

THOSE BETTER BE TALKING BUBBLES, BUDDY.

AAAAH!

Prime: ♪ I SAID, YOU AIN'T GOT NO RHYME ♪

♪ AND YOU GONNA LOSE BIG TIME

♪ 'CAUSE NO M.C. HAS EVER SURVIVED THAT WENT UP ♪

♪ AGAINST PRIME...

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--

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