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1
00:00:00,871 --> 00:00:02,070
Bad news, everyone.
2
00:00:02,138 --> 00:00:04,805
They have pushed back
our renovations again.
3
00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:06,740
I know. It's such a bummer.
4
00:00:06,809 --> 00:00:11,546
But, at least we still have staff picks.
5
00:00:11,581 --> 00:00:13,414
All right, m'lovelies, give 'em to me!
6
00:00:13,483 --> 00:00:16,184
I've got "The Transformenstruation".
7
00:00:16,219 --> 00:00:18,018
It is the first book in Michaela Ramos'
8
00:00:18,054 --> 00:00:19,220
Bloodiest Moon Trilogy.
9
00:00:19,255 --> 00:00:20,521
Oh!
10
00:00:20,557 --> 00:00:24,592
It's terrifying, and
angsty, and so necessary.
11
00:00:24,660 --> 00:00:26,260
Why are we pushing this drivel?
12
00:00:26,329 --> 00:00:28,028
Okay, it's a bunch of magic
and fairy tale nonsense.
13
00:00:28,064 --> 00:00:29,530
Bryce.
14
00:00:29,566 --> 00:00:31,765
Oh, are you outraged about
a fiction book being promoted
15
00:00:31,834 --> 00:00:33,934
at the, hm, checks notes, library?
16
00:00:34,003 --> 00:00:35,435
- You forget what we do here?
- Never.
17
00:00:35,504 --> 00:00:37,337
We are a public service
for tax paying citizens
18
00:00:37,372 --> 00:00:40,007
and landed immigrants who
came here the right way.
19
00:00:40,042 --> 00:00:41,609
- That's not exactly...
- But that book is trash.
20
00:00:41,677 --> 00:00:43,577
Okay, I won't read it, haven't
read it, but it's trash.
21
00:00:43,613 --> 00:00:46,179
Noted. Now, what's your pick?
22
00:00:46,215 --> 00:00:47,948
Oh, are you flippin' kidding me?
23
00:00:48,017 --> 00:00:49,416
Jaq, language.
24
00:00:49,451 --> 00:00:52,219
Bryce, what exactly is
"The Republic's Edge"?
25
00:00:52,254 --> 00:00:53,787
Oh, they're a conservative faction...
26
00:00:53,856 --> 00:00:55,422
Faction?! Ha!
27
00:00:55,457 --> 00:00:56,690
Overreact much? No.
28
00:00:56,726 --> 00:00:57,791
No, we're just a bunch fellas
29
00:00:57,860 --> 00:00:59,392
who get together and talk policy.
30
00:00:59,428 --> 00:01:01,228
I mean we started as a paintball
group for Christ's sake.
31
00:01:01,263 --> 00:01:02,896
Wendy, no, they're a
bunch of right wing dicks.
32
00:01:02,932 --> 00:01:04,131
- Dicks?
- Dicks.
33
00:01:04,199 --> 00:01:05,532
Let the record show I'm offended.
34
00:01:05,567 --> 00:01:07,100
Okay, nice try, tohtineh but white men
35
00:01:07,136 --> 00:01:08,768
- can't be offended, so...
- Has anyone received a call
36
00:01:08,803 --> 00:01:10,036
from our day transfer?
37
00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:11,071
He's late.
38
00:01:13,375 --> 00:01:15,742
Can I even park here?
39
00:01:16,911 --> 00:01:18,111
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, man!
40
00:01:18,147 --> 00:01:19,379
What are you doin'? Quit it!
41
00:01:19,414 --> 00:01:21,781
Mid-stream? Nah, that's
bad for your Wang.
42
00:01:21,816 --> 00:01:22,882
Ugh. Unbelievable.
43
00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:24,217
That book is garbage.
44
00:01:24,253 --> 00:01:25,752
How can you write a whole
book on menstruation?
45
00:01:25,787 --> 00:01:28,321
You know, what's garbage is
your podcast that you listen to.
46
00:01:28,390 --> 00:01:30,089
Patton Jefferson's "Lamestream Bias"
47
00:01:30,125 --> 00:01:32,425
is a haven for reasonable thought, okay?
48
00:01:32,461 --> 00:01:36,329
He is a man of the people,
for the people, by the people.
49
00:01:36,398 --> 00:01:38,097
- Esjieeee!
- Wendy, no, she...
50
00:01:38,133 --> 00:01:41,767
That book cost a fortune to bind
and intellectually copyright.
51
00:01:41,802 --> 00:01:44,403
Bryce, could you please
just pick an actual book.
52
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:47,406
Okay, all right, just
put up last month's.
53
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:49,808
- Eat, Pray, Love?
- What?
54
00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:51,743
I like the chapters where she eats.
55
00:02:01,355 --> 00:02:02,655
Ah, morning, Wendy!
56
00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:03,690
Morning.
57
00:02:03,691 --> 00:02:04,823
Alvin, Slow down!
58
00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:06,492
I'm not taking you to urgent care again.
59
00:02:06,527 --> 00:02:07,959
Sheila, what are you doing here?
60
00:02:07,995 --> 00:02:09,828
You're not scheduled to work
the settlement desk today.
61
00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:12,416
No, but I left a textbook and
I'm already late for class, so...
62
00:02:14,501 --> 00:02:16,668
Sabine!
63
00:02:16,704 --> 00:02:19,604
You are lookin' fancy and hireable.
64
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:20,706
Thanks to your program.
65
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:22,440
I can't afford anything this boring,
66
00:02:22,475 --> 00:02:23,875
but, I'll borrow it.
67
00:02:23,944 --> 00:02:26,178
Well, I'm glad one of my old suits
68
00:02:26,213 --> 00:02:28,613
is being put to good use.
69
00:02:28,648 --> 00:02:30,182
Hey, are your computers working yet?
70
00:02:30,217 --> 00:02:31,516
I need to print a résumé.
71
00:02:31,551 --> 00:02:33,218
Oh, no, the replacement
computers aren't here yet,
72
00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:34,519
but they should be here later today.
73
00:02:34,554 --> 00:02:35,554
Hm.
74
00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:37,155
We can print it in my office.
75
00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,524
Yeah, I should have enough
toner left for a couple of pages.
76
00:02:39,559 --> 00:02:40,559
Okay.
77
00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:45,831
Wait! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
78
00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:47,631
I am so sorry, but,
79
00:02:47,666 --> 00:02:50,134
I guess none of you
wanted it badly enough.
80
00:02:50,169 --> 00:02:52,203
But, if you need a freelance consultant
81
00:02:52,238 --> 00:02:54,972
to be better at things, then
please make an appointment.
82
00:02:55,007 --> 00:02:56,473
Okay?
83
00:02:56,508 --> 00:02:58,042
Bye. See you soon.
84
00:02:58,077 --> 00:02:59,676
You know you really shouldn't
have that study room every day.
85
00:02:59,712 --> 00:03:01,045
Well, I won. It's library law.
86
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:02,379
No such thing, Alvin.
87
00:03:02,414 --> 00:03:05,315
Grabbing a coffee. Back in 15.
88
00:03:13,159 --> 00:03:17,995
Heavens. It's just one day, Howard.
89
00:03:18,030 --> 00:03:19,930
One day. Oh, um, good morning.
90
00:03:19,999 --> 00:03:21,030
I'm... I'm looking for the branch head,
91
00:03:21,066 --> 00:03:22,066
Wendy Yarmouth?
92
00:03:22,067 --> 00:03:23,867
- You found her!
- Oh.
93
00:03:23,902 --> 00:03:26,369
And you are our day transfer
from Midtown Library,
94
00:03:26,404 --> 00:03:27,404
Howard Toot.
95
00:03:27,405 --> 00:03:29,338
Oh, um, Tutt. Howard Tutt.
96
00:03:29,374 --> 00:03:30,840
I'm glad you're here. Consent to a hug?
97
00:03:30,876 --> 00:03:32,575
Oh, no. I'm afraid not.
98
00:03:32,610 --> 00:03:34,610
All righty, let me show you around.
99
00:03:34,679 --> 00:03:36,579
Oh, is there a place to put my...
100
00:03:36,614 --> 00:03:39,682
Nothing.
101
00:03:39,717 --> 00:03:41,885
We have fiction over here.
102
00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:43,586
Uh, these are our new releases.
103
00:03:43,621 --> 00:03:45,889
We've got DVDs back there.
104
00:03:45,924 --> 00:03:47,590
We need a new Muppet Movie DVD
105
00:03:47,625 --> 00:03:49,859
'cause I have worn that sucker out.
106
00:03:49,895 --> 00:03:52,361
Oh, DVDs don't wear
out. They deteriorate.
107
00:03:54,265 --> 00:03:57,600
Reference materials and magazines.
108
00:03:57,635 --> 00:03:59,802
Um, so that's it? Just the one floor?
109
00:03:59,870 --> 00:04:02,471
We have a few meeting
rooms downstairs, but, yeah,
110
00:04:02,540 --> 00:04:05,274
this is our baby.
111
00:04:05,310 --> 00:04:07,042
I'm sorry. What happened there?
112
00:04:10,581 --> 00:04:11,947
Um...
113
00:04:11,982 --> 00:04:13,716
Yeah, you know, sometimes
with these older machines,
114
00:04:13,751 --> 00:04:15,384
it's just best to restart.
115
00:04:20,157 --> 00:04:23,125
Run!
116
00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,894
We all went home early that day.
117
00:04:25,930 --> 00:04:28,096
Why hasn't home office
fixed any of this?
118
00:04:28,132 --> 00:04:30,299
You know they just put a mini
movie theatre in at Leslie.
119
00:04:30,334 --> 00:04:31,934
- Did they?
- Yes.
120
00:04:31,969 --> 00:04:34,469
Even at Midtown, we had a bank
of computers short one morning.
121
00:04:34,504 --> 00:04:36,738
They had replacements
into us that afternoon.
122
00:04:36,773 --> 00:04:38,073
How long has it been for you? A month?
123
00:04:38,108 --> 00:04:40,309
Months...
124
00:04:40,344 --> 00:04:43,645
Uh, but, they said they're coming today.
125
00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,315
So maybe I will go give them a ring
126
00:04:46,350 --> 00:04:47,482
and see where they're at.
127
00:04:47,517 --> 00:04:48,750
Come on.
128
00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:53,355
Bryce, can you show
our day transfer around?
129
00:04:53,423 --> 00:04:55,490
I have to check on the status
of our replacement computers.
130
00:04:55,525 --> 00:04:56,861
You finally gonna show those
paper pushers what's what?
131
00:04:56,861 --> 00:04:58,193
That's right.
132
00:04:58,262 --> 00:05:00,128
About to get a whole buncha
Wendy up in their craw.
133
00:05:00,164 --> 00:05:02,964
Fools better have my Norton AntiVirus.
134
00:05:02,999 --> 00:05:04,699
Yeah, there's "Fierce Wendy." Love her.
135
00:05:06,436 --> 00:05:09,003
And, you ruined it.
136
00:05:09,038 --> 00:05:11,973
Uh, this is Tanya. This is Jaq.
137
00:05:12,008 --> 00:05:13,140
Jaq is the only librarian
138
00:05:13,176 --> 00:05:15,977
that understands our
social media accounts.
139
00:05:16,012 --> 00:05:18,646
This is my assistant head, Bryce.
140
00:05:18,682 --> 00:05:20,314
Bryce, Howard.
141
00:05:20,350 --> 00:05:21,716
Bryce Howard!
142
00:05:21,785 --> 00:05:23,351
We just need a Dallas
now to complete the set.
143
00:05:25,689 --> 00:05:27,522
- Bryce, you got him?
- Yeah, I got him, boss-lady.
144
00:05:27,557 --> 00:05:28,890
"Boss-lady?"
145
00:05:28,958 --> 00:05:30,525
So if she was a guy, you'd
call her boss-man, right?
146
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:32,460
Don't try to ensnare me in
one of your sexism traps.
147
00:05:32,496 --> 00:05:33,496
I'm not. I'm just asking.
148
00:05:33,497 --> 00:05:34,662
It's not gonna work again.
149
00:05:34,698 --> 00:05:36,230
Besides you don't
need to say "boss-man."
150
00:05:36,299 --> 00:05:37,731
The man part's implied.
151
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:40,368
Is there, like, a locker, or
some such I can put this in?
152
00:05:40,403 --> 00:05:41,403
Just toss it on the pile.
153
00:05:41,470 --> 00:05:43,170
Your jacket can keep my jacket warm.
154
00:05:43,206 --> 00:05:44,972
Ah.
155
00:05:45,008 --> 00:05:46,540
Y-You know, I'll just keep it on.
156
00:05:46,575 --> 00:05:48,742
- It's, uh, deceptively light.
- Uh-huh, what?
157
00:05:48,811 --> 00:05:50,644
Are you worried us poor Jameson staffers
158
00:05:50,679 --> 00:05:53,214
are gonna steal your fancy
jacket that's got all the...
159
00:05:53,249 --> 00:05:54,249
... the buttons on it still?
160
00:05:54,317 --> 00:05:57,351
No, I... I... have thin bones, yes.
161
00:05:57,387 --> 00:05:59,686
- Thin bones.
- Ugh.
162
00:05:59,722 --> 00:06:02,689
All right there, Big Library,
163
00:06:02,725 --> 00:06:05,026
I'll take you on the ten cent tour.
164
00:06:05,061 --> 00:06:06,760
Stay close. Keep up.
165
00:06:06,829 --> 00:06:08,896
So why take a day transfer?
166
00:06:08,932 --> 00:06:11,064
You, uh, trying to get
away from your branch?
167
00:06:11,099 --> 00:06:13,366
Oh, no. Um, I'm at Midtown.
168
00:06:13,402 --> 00:06:15,035
I love it, obviously, but, um,
169
00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:16,236
I'm looking for a bit of extra cash.
170
00:06:16,271 --> 00:06:17,737
Mm-hm.
171
00:06:17,772 --> 00:06:20,740
Uh, yeah, it seems I need to
replace half of my furniture.
172
00:06:20,775 --> 00:06:22,608
Oh! Bed bugs or break up?
173
00:06:22,677 --> 00:06:24,244
Um, break up. Thank God.
174
00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:26,446
Mm-hm, been there. A lot.
175
00:06:26,514 --> 00:06:28,048
Anyhoo, over there at the front desk
176
00:06:28,083 --> 00:06:29,449
you got your Naloxone.
177
00:06:29,517 --> 00:06:32,352
If anybody asks, the needle
drop is in the washroom.
178
00:06:32,387 --> 00:06:34,120
Uh, there's a lot less gang fights here
179
00:06:34,189 --> 00:06:35,355
than at my previous library.
180
00:06:35,390 --> 00:06:37,457
- Oh.
- And over there you've got...
181
00:06:37,525 --> 00:06:38,791
Oh, you've got a young
fella about to read
182
00:06:38,860 --> 00:06:39,926
some feminist trash.
183
00:06:39,962 --> 00:06:41,527
Excuse me.
184
00:06:41,563 --> 00:06:43,529
Young man, put the book down, please.
185
00:06:51,539 --> 00:06:54,106
Hi, there. Can I help you find a book?
186
00:06:54,141 --> 00:06:55,141
I'm fine.
187
00:06:55,142 --> 00:06:56,976
Oh, well, maybe something else?
188
00:06:57,044 --> 00:06:59,144
A movie or an instrument?
189
00:06:59,213 --> 00:07:02,081
Oh, you're getting
close. You are very close.
190
00:07:02,116 --> 00:07:04,283
Jaq!
191
00:07:05,386 --> 00:07:06,719
Need something, Wendy?
192
00:07:06,754 --> 00:07:08,654
What's Bay Street's deal?
193
00:07:08,723 --> 00:07:10,990
His name is Big Library. Day transfer.
194
00:07:11,058 --> 00:07:12,625
Howard, what is your problem?
195
00:07:12,660 --> 00:07:14,827
No problem. I...
196
00:07:14,896 --> 00:07:16,896
I'm just trying to help
Wendy find something
197
00:07:16,931 --> 00:07:18,964
so she can be on her way.
198
00:07:18,999 --> 00:07:20,764
Oh. On my way, eh?
199
00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:23,300
This elitist prick is trying to kick me
200
00:07:23,335 --> 00:07:25,435
out of a public library.
201
00:07:25,471 --> 00:07:29,306
As a member of the public,
who should I complain to?
202
00:07:29,341 --> 00:07:30,440
I'll tell the Other Wendy.
203
00:07:30,476 --> 00:07:32,342
Look, I have an exemplary track record
204
00:07:32,411 --> 00:07:34,077
dealing with patrons of all types.
205
00:07:34,113 --> 00:07:39,082
So I'm sure me and this Wendy
can sort things out on our own.
206
00:07:39,118 --> 00:07:42,987
Well, all is forgiven.
207
00:07:43,022 --> 00:07:45,756
If...
208
00:07:50,129 --> 00:07:51,629
Okay, okay. Okay, okay.
209
00:07:58,503 --> 00:08:00,770
You were gonna kiss my hand!?
210
00:08:00,805 --> 00:08:02,672
You were. You were gonna do it.
211
00:08:02,707 --> 00:08:06,275
You have no idea where it's been.
212
00:08:06,310 --> 00:08:09,311
- No, I don't.
- No idea.
213
00:08:12,017 --> 00:08:14,651
Welcome to Parkdale, Hollard.
214
00:08:21,225 --> 00:08:23,125
They're here! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
215
00:08:23,161 --> 00:08:24,527
Wait. Stop, stop, stop right there.
216
00:08:24,563 --> 00:08:26,828
What in puppy kisses are these?
217
00:08:26,864 --> 00:08:28,330
Your "new" computers.
218
00:08:28,366 --> 00:08:29,565
No, no, no, no, no!
219
00:08:29,633 --> 00:08:31,667
These are older than the ones we had!
220
00:08:31,702 --> 00:08:32,801
Sucks to be Jameson.
221
00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:41,009
The only thing that sucks in here
222
00:08:41,045 --> 00:08:43,379
is those dusty, old computers.
223
00:08:43,414 --> 00:08:46,014
So take those dinosaurs
back to a museum!
224
00:08:46,050 --> 00:08:47,516
Yeah, get 'em, Fierce Wendy!
225
00:08:47,552 --> 00:08:52,154
And, bring us some computers
made after the Mesozoic era!
226
00:08:52,190 --> 00:08:53,389
Okay, she's tryin'.
227
00:08:55,606 --> 00:08:57,905
This is C-R-A-P, Loretta!
Again we're brushed aside.
228
00:08:57,941 --> 00:09:01,610
We are understaffed,
underfunded, under fire.
229
00:09:01,645 --> 00:09:03,245
We literally had a fire!
230
00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:04,312
We cleaned that up.
231
00:09:04,348 --> 00:09:06,414
And left us without computers.
232
00:09:06,450 --> 00:09:08,916
Half our patrons come
here to use the computers.
233
00:09:08,952 --> 00:09:11,152
We can't just forget about Jasmine,
234
00:09:11,187 --> 00:09:14,522
who comes here to do research
for school projects, or,
235
00:09:14,591 --> 00:09:17,925
or Pam, a single mom who
can't afford Internet at home,
236
00:09:17,961 --> 00:09:22,663
or Bob, who does only appropriate
things on there. I hope.
237
00:09:22,698 --> 00:09:24,765
Well, I just sent you six computers.
238
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,434
They had Netscape Navigator on them!
239
00:09:27,470 --> 00:09:29,436
If you have good Wi-Fi,
your patrons can just
240
00:09:29,472 --> 00:09:31,538
bring in their laptops.
241
00:09:31,607 --> 00:09:34,875
I bet you would send us computers
if we were any other branch.
242
00:09:34,943 --> 00:09:37,344
Like Leslie, maybe?
243
00:09:40,182 --> 00:09:42,383
Wendy, tread lightly.
244
00:09:42,451 --> 00:09:45,452
I'm not treading. I just...
245
00:09:45,488 --> 00:09:47,688
You were their branch manager
before you got this job
246
00:09:47,723 --> 00:09:49,890
running facilities,
which you totally deserve,
247
00:09:49,958 --> 00:09:53,727
but I just heard that
they got a movie theatre.
248
00:09:53,796 --> 00:09:55,862
It's more of a screening salon.
249
00:09:55,898 --> 00:09:57,664
And I petitioned for that years ago.
250
00:10:01,303 --> 00:10:02,836
If the other branch managers knew...
251
00:10:02,871 --> 00:10:04,004
I'm gonna stop you right there, Wendy,
252
00:10:04,039 --> 00:10:06,206
'cause I do not
negotiate with terrorists.
253
00:10:06,241 --> 00:10:07,373
Terrorist?!
254
00:10:07,409 --> 00:10:09,375
Because I want some flippin' computers?!
255
00:10:09,411 --> 00:10:11,011
Oh! Language.
256
00:10:11,046 --> 00:10:12,145
All right, well, your
complaint is noted.
257
00:10:12,181 --> 00:10:13,579
Thank you so much. I gotta go.
258
00:10:13,648 --> 00:10:14,648
N... n... No!
259
00:10:14,649 --> 00:10:16,850
Damn it!
260
00:10:16,885 --> 00:10:18,718
Oh! Language.
261
00:10:21,890 --> 00:10:24,090
These computers,
262
00:10:24,159 --> 00:10:25,591
you're not keeping them, are you?
263
00:10:25,660 --> 00:10:27,660
Mm, probably.
264
00:10:27,696 --> 00:10:29,529
Fierce Wendy's gonna
do something, right?
265
00:10:29,564 --> 00:10:33,399
Mm, that Fierce Wendy thing
is pure fiction section.
266
00:10:33,435 --> 00:10:34,900
I mean, don't get me wrong. I love her.
267
00:10:34,936 --> 00:10:37,203
I would melt a body in a
tub full of hydrofluoric acid
268
00:10:37,238 --> 00:10:40,039
for her, but, she cares too much
about what other people think.
269
00:10:40,074 --> 00:10:42,709
And so, this is what we get.
270
00:10:42,744 --> 00:10:43,744
Disappointing.
271
00:10:43,745 --> 00:10:45,778
Yeah.
272
00:10:45,847 --> 00:10:49,181
Listen up, fellow library staff!
273
00:10:49,217 --> 00:10:51,551
- Please leave.
- We're done anyway.
274
00:10:51,586 --> 00:10:52,586
They're all yours.
275
00:10:52,620 --> 00:10:53,786
That's right. They're all ours.
276
00:10:53,855 --> 00:10:55,221
Safe trip back to 1987
277
00:10:55,256 --> 00:10:56,889
or wherever the frack you came from.
278
00:10:56,924 --> 00:10:59,058
- Language.
- Oh, wow.
279
00:10:59,093 --> 00:11:00,793
Can these things even
connect to the Internet?
280
00:11:00,862 --> 00:11:03,295
Oh, you know what?
281
00:11:03,364 --> 00:11:06,065
I'll go over to Tech Town.
They're always having sales.
282
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,532
I could maybe pick
up a couple computers.
283
00:11:07,568 --> 00:11:09,534
No, Wendy, you can't afford it.
284
00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:10,970
I have a little savings.
285
00:11:13,607 --> 00:11:15,908
These are the most
basic computers we have.
286
00:11:15,943 --> 00:11:19,311
I could give you 10 percent
off. Every little bit helps.
287
00:11:19,380 --> 00:11:25,951
Maybe we can think of
another way to drop the price.
288
00:11:25,987 --> 00:11:28,587
- I'm happily married.
- Oh, no, no.
289
00:11:28,622 --> 00:11:29,922
Did you think I was trying to be flirty?
290
00:11:29,957 --> 00:11:33,458
I-I... no, I'm sorry.
Let me try that again.
291
00:11:33,494 --> 00:11:38,462
I am the manager of the Jameson Library.
292
00:11:38,498 --> 00:11:41,099
- I'm good.
- Okay, all righty.
293
00:11:41,134 --> 00:11:45,436
Oh!
294
00:11:45,471 --> 00:11:47,138
Hi, Loretta. Call to apologize?
295
00:11:47,173 --> 00:11:49,607
Hi, welcome to Tech Town.
296
00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:51,609
Are you in Tech Town?
297
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:55,579
No, I'm at lunch. She said "Taco Town".
298
00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:58,950
There's no food in Tech Town!
299
00:11:58,985 --> 00:12:02,120
Don't blow your salary
to make a point, Wendy.
300
00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:03,788
- Did you call for a reason?
- Yes.
301
00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:05,856
I can't get you better computers yet,
302
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:09,260
but, I have a solution to
your understaffed problem.
303
00:12:09,296 --> 00:12:10,628
I'm listening.
304
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:12,296
And I'll tell you this
is a poorly built shoe.
305
00:12:12,331 --> 00:12:13,496
You look along the seams here
306
00:12:13,532 --> 00:12:15,299
you can tell that this
is just one stitch.
307
00:12:15,334 --> 00:12:16,967
- Okay.
- Okay, what's happening?
308
00:12:17,002 --> 00:12:18,002
What am I walking in on?
309
00:12:18,003 --> 00:12:19,469
Just another round of
310
00:12:19,504 --> 00:12:21,305
What's the Weirdest Thing
you Found in the Return Slot?"
311
00:12:21,340 --> 00:12:24,607
Size 10 men's shoe with a
perfectly good golf ball inside.
312
00:12:24,643 --> 00:12:26,109
Okay, hang on a second.
313
00:12:26,145 --> 00:12:27,945
How can you even get foreign
objects in the book return?
314
00:12:27,980 --> 00:12:29,379
Isn't it automated?
315
00:12:31,516 --> 00:12:34,318
Okay, you're gonna wanna hold
onto your butt with this one.
316
00:12:34,353 --> 00:12:36,286
- What do ya got?
- Okay, ready?
317
00:12:36,322 --> 00:12:37,487
- Oh!
- Ah!
318
00:12:37,522 --> 00:12:39,022
- Well, you win.
- Oh, yeah,
319
00:12:39,058 --> 00:12:40,958
- That's good, that's good.
- Look at those freakin' teeth.
320
00:12:40,993 --> 00:12:44,027
- There those are.
- You wear dentures?
321
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:46,563
No.
322
00:12:46,631 --> 00:12:47,697
You know, it's official.
323
00:12:47,732 --> 00:12:49,031
This branch is worse than Tyler Perry's
324
00:12:49,067 --> 00:12:50,800
"A Madea Family Funeral".
325
00:12:50,836 --> 00:12:52,134
Who's Madea? Who's Tyler Perries?
326
00:12:52,170 --> 00:12:53,202
And whose funeral is it?
327
00:12:53,237 --> 00:12:54,804
Howard, have you taken
out the trash yet?
328
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,306
Are you serious? You guys
don't you have a clerk?
329
00:12:57,342 --> 00:12:59,342
Oh, do you mean our book butler?
330
00:12:59,377 --> 00:13:00,877
He's outside with the trash receptacles,
331
00:13:00,912 --> 00:13:03,746
because, he's a raccoon.
332
00:13:03,815 --> 00:13:05,882
Four more hours.
333
00:13:05,917 --> 00:13:08,384
Um, Howard, can I speak
to you for a minute?
334
00:13:10,689 --> 00:13:14,524
I have some news that you
can take one of two ways.
335
00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:18,427
Option A, freak out, which
is helpful to no one, or,
336
00:13:18,496 --> 00:13:21,497
um... Option B, try to
look on the bright side.
337
00:13:21,532 --> 00:13:23,832
Okay...
338
00:13:23,868 --> 00:13:26,067
You can finally take off your coat,
339
00:13:26,103 --> 00:13:29,337
because your day transfer
is officially permanent.
340
00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:31,707
Welcome to Jameson!
341
00:13:31,742 --> 00:13:34,610
What? No.
342
00:13:34,678 --> 00:13:37,045
- What?!
- Oh!
343
00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:39,515
Maybe this celebration
cupcake will help?
344
00:13:45,455 --> 00:13:47,789
It's probably best.
It's been there a week.
345
00:13:50,610 --> 00:13:53,645
No, n-n-no, no, Isla, this
was supposed to be for one day.
346
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:55,513
Jameson needs help. It's a win-win.
347
00:13:55,548 --> 00:13:58,817
- You see two wins in this?
- One for Wendy and one for me.
348
00:13:58,852 --> 00:14:00,151
Now it won't be so awkward here.
349
00:14:00,186 --> 00:14:02,720
It's not my fault people
are awkward around us.
350
00:14:02,789 --> 00:14:04,722
Okay, you called off our engagement.
351
00:14:04,791 --> 00:14:06,824
If it were up to me,
we'd be married by now.
352
00:14:06,859 --> 00:14:08,493
Yeah, I know.
353
00:14:08,528 --> 00:14:10,961
Either way, things are
weird with both of us here.
354
00:14:10,997 --> 00:14:13,864
- Weird how?
- Ugh.
355
00:14:13,900 --> 00:14:15,032
Good evening, patrons.
356
00:14:15,067 --> 00:14:16,367
This is just a friendly reminder
357
00:14:16,403 --> 00:14:18,736
that the Midtown Library
is closing in 10 minutes.
358
00:14:18,805 --> 00:14:21,806
So, do check out any
books that you have.
359
00:14:21,841 --> 00:14:25,209
And, yes, I know, parting
is such sweet sorrow.
360
00:14:25,244 --> 00:14:26,411
You know, I thought she was the one,
361
00:14:26,479 --> 00:14:29,414
but, uh, I'm the one sleeping on a futon
362
00:14:29,482 --> 00:14:31,482
in my ma's basement.
363
00:14:31,518 --> 00:14:34,018
Lacrimo, ergo sum!
364
00:14:34,053 --> 00:14:35,552
- Howard!
- Um, ten minutes.
365
00:14:35,587 --> 00:14:38,522
- Gotta go, bye.
- Grow the (BLEEP) up.
366
00:14:38,557 --> 00:14:40,590
Listen.
367
00:14:40,659 --> 00:14:42,759
It is a new branch, new co-workers.
368
00:14:42,829 --> 00:14:44,161
It's a fresh start.
369
00:14:44,197 --> 00:14:46,496
I don't want a fresh
start. I want my old branch.
370
00:14:46,532 --> 00:14:48,199
I am complaining to home office.
371
00:14:48,234 --> 00:14:50,935
Good luck with that. Bye, Howard.
372
00:14:51,003 --> 00:14:52,837
Isla Donovan, do not hang up this phone!
373
00:14:52,872 --> 00:14:54,104
Isla!
374
00:14:55,507 --> 00:14:57,341
Ay, it's a library,
dog! Cut all that out!
375
00:14:57,376 --> 00:14:58,408
Oh, uh, I'm so sorry.
376
00:14:58,444 --> 00:14:59,743
Yeah, I lost it there for a second.
377
00:14:59,778 --> 00:15:01,078
Yeah, I saw that.
378
00:15:01,113 --> 00:15:02,880
Ain't nobody needin' all
that drama, Jane Austen!
379
00:15:02,915 --> 00:15:04,915
This ain't Pride and Prejudice.
380
00:15:07,253 --> 00:15:09,419
Oh, hey, Jaq. I have a
meeting coming in soon.
381
00:15:09,455 --> 00:15:10,620
So if they get here before I'm back,
382
00:15:10,689 --> 00:15:12,889
- do you mind just...
- Oh-ho, I get it.
383
00:15:12,924 --> 00:15:14,558
Because I'm a woman behind a desk,
384
00:15:14,593 --> 00:15:16,960
that makes me your assistant.
385
00:15:17,028 --> 00:15:20,129
- No, no, no, that's...
- Get out of my face.
386
00:15:20,198 --> 00:15:21,465
- Yes.
- Denehgeh.
387
00:15:21,533 --> 00:15:22,766
Bye. Bye...
388
00:15:22,801 --> 00:15:24,267
Jaq, where's Wendy?
389
00:15:24,302 --> 00:15:26,770
Oh, because I'm a woman behind a desk,
390
00:15:26,805 --> 00:15:27,805
I'm her assistant.
391
00:15:27,873 --> 00:15:29,740
- Wendy?
- Yeah, Hoddard?
392
00:15:29,775 --> 00:15:31,074
Oh, you know what?
393
00:15:31,109 --> 00:15:32,776
Um, I actually meant Other Wendy.
394
00:15:32,811 --> 00:15:36,980
Yeah, well, you didn't specify
so now you got my attention.
395
00:15:37,048 --> 00:15:38,448
Where do we go from here, Hoddard?
396
00:15:38,484 --> 00:15:41,917
You and me, on a
beach, maybe go-karting.
397
00:15:41,952 --> 00:15:43,218
You know what? That sounds nice.
398
00:15:43,254 --> 00:15:44,953
You thought of monster trucks?
399
00:15:47,291 --> 00:15:49,925
- Wendy?
- Yeah?
400
00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:51,761
Please transfer me back to Midtown.
401
00:15:51,796 --> 00:15:53,396
Oh, it's hard enough
402
00:15:53,431 --> 00:15:55,731
sending books back to
their original location.
403
00:15:55,767 --> 00:15:57,332
Let alone people.
404
00:15:57,402 --> 00:15:58,501
Loretta said that your branch manager
405
00:15:58,569 --> 00:16:00,002
was gonna give you a call.
406
00:16:00,070 --> 00:16:03,171
I don't know why I
expected anything from you.
407
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:04,740
Sorry?
408
00:16:04,776 --> 00:16:06,809
I'm gonna tell you something
your staffers will never say.
409
00:16:06,844 --> 00:16:09,244
It doesn't matter how "adorbs" you are,
410
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:11,313
or how many cupcakes you
have, or how many computers
411
00:16:11,348 --> 00:16:12,981
you ridiculously try to buy yourself.
412
00:16:13,017 --> 00:16:14,683
Until you actually become Fierce Wendy,
413
00:16:14,752 --> 00:16:16,151
whatever that means,
414
00:16:16,186 --> 00:16:18,420
your branch will never be respected.
415
00:16:33,637 --> 00:16:36,037
Is this a Jameson tradition
I'm about to report?
416
00:16:36,105 --> 00:16:38,506
You close your mouth and you listen now.
417
00:16:38,542 --> 00:16:39,841
Okay, Big Library?
418
00:16:39,876 --> 00:16:41,375
We don't like how you
talked to Wendy just now.
419
00:16:41,445 --> 00:16:42,811
So, you're gonna fix it,
420
00:16:42,846 --> 00:16:45,146
or else "Big Library's"
about to become "Short Stack."
421
00:16:45,181 --> 00:16:46,981
Come on, you're the one that
told me she was too nice.
422
00:16:47,016 --> 00:16:49,350
Wendy is a delicate piece of china.
423
00:16:49,385 --> 00:16:52,886
She's not dishwasher
safe. You understand me?
424
00:16:52,956 --> 00:16:54,221
No... No, I don't.
425
00:16:54,290 --> 00:16:56,991
Listen, you're gonna suck
it up and go say sorry.
426
00:16:57,026 --> 00:16:58,359
Can I at least go pee first?
427
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:02,729
Yes.
428
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:06,167
- Oh.
- Oh okay, yeah, we'll be out...
429
00:17:10,639 --> 00:17:13,975
Mm-hm.
430
00:17:14,010 --> 00:17:15,476
Um...
431
00:17:15,511 --> 00:17:17,144
Look, um...
432
00:17:17,180 --> 00:17:18,379
I'm sorry about what I said earlier.
433
00:17:18,414 --> 00:17:19,746
- I was...
- You were right.
434
00:17:22,151 --> 00:17:24,385
Norman, our old branch manager,
435
00:17:24,420 --> 00:17:26,586
he... wasn't easy to work for.
436
00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:29,222
And I really didn't
wanna end up like him,
437
00:17:29,257 --> 00:17:32,092
but, maybe I've gone
too far the other way.
438
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,895
No, Wendy, people love you.
439
00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:37,397
Uh... um,
440
00:17:37,432 --> 00:17:40,233
pathologically and homicidally.
441
00:17:43,005 --> 00:17:47,874
And I understand why
Jameson isn't ideal.
442
00:17:47,909 --> 00:17:49,942
But, can I ask you something?
443
00:17:50,012 --> 00:17:53,179
Why did you wanna become a
librarian in the first place?
444
00:17:53,215 --> 00:17:57,717
Well, I guess, when I was a kid,
445
00:17:57,752 --> 00:17:59,886
I'd be in my library all the time.
446
00:17:59,921 --> 00:18:02,054
There's this lady, Mrs. Brenneman.
447
00:18:02,089 --> 00:18:04,289
Here you are, Howie.
448
00:18:04,358 --> 00:18:06,091
Thank you, Ms. Brenneman.
449
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:07,860
Howard : She'd always
share her cookies with me.
450
00:18:07,896 --> 00:18:09,695
She'd even warm them up.
451
00:18:09,731 --> 00:18:11,731
My library was kind of a second home.
452
00:18:11,766 --> 00:18:14,099
Closing time, Howie.
453
00:18:14,135 --> 00:18:15,200
Howard : She was just there,
454
00:18:15,236 --> 00:18:16,435
through it all.
455
00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:19,038
Kind, smart, she listened.
456
00:18:19,073 --> 00:18:23,308
I wanted so badly to be
that for someone else.
457
00:18:23,377 --> 00:18:25,144
Why don't you give Jameson a shot?
458
00:18:25,212 --> 00:18:27,479
Be our Mrs. Brenneman.
459
00:18:27,549 --> 00:18:31,283
This is very heart-warming,
but it's not fair, you know?
460
00:18:31,318 --> 00:18:35,319
Isla gets to stay at Midtown
and she's the one who cheated.
461
00:18:35,388 --> 00:18:36,555
Hm.
462
00:18:36,590 --> 00:18:37,956
Hold your hush puppies.
463
00:18:37,991 --> 00:18:39,591
You were in a relationship
with your branch manager?
464
00:18:40,794 --> 00:18:41,826
Well, she wasn't the branch manager
465
00:18:41,895 --> 00:18:43,127
when we started dating,
466
00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:46,230
and so we thought it
was fine to keep dating.
467
00:18:46,266 --> 00:18:47,999
In actual fact, our
problems only really began
468
00:18:48,068 --> 00:18:50,168
when she was promoted over
me, but up until then...
469
00:18:50,236 --> 00:18:51,603
Hold on. Howard, stop.
470
00:18:51,638 --> 00:18:52,771
I... I-I'm sorry.
471
00:18:52,806 --> 00:18:55,907
We will unpack all of
that some other time,
472
00:18:55,943 --> 00:18:58,777
but just for clarity,
she didn't transfer you
473
00:18:58,812 --> 00:19:00,311
when she became branch manager?
474
00:19:00,346 --> 00:19:01,446
No.
475
00:19:01,481 --> 00:19:02,614
Then you broke up, and you were Gonzo?
476
00:19:02,649 --> 00:19:03,682
Yes.
477
00:19:06,987 --> 00:19:09,787
Well, that was an odd,
little rollercoaster.
478
00:19:09,822 --> 00:19:12,790
Isla, I really appreciate
you sending Howard to us,
479
00:19:12,825 --> 00:19:16,760
but I was hoping to get someone
with a little more experience.
480
00:19:16,796 --> 00:19:18,662
Howard has over 10 years under his belt.
481
00:19:18,698 --> 00:19:19,698
He's pretty solid.
482
00:19:19,699 --> 00:19:22,200
So why'd you dump him?
483
00:19:22,268 --> 00:19:25,103
As an employee, not as a fiancé.
484
00:19:25,138 --> 00:19:27,205
Right. He told you?
485
00:19:27,273 --> 00:19:29,140
He did.
486
00:19:29,175 --> 00:19:32,009
You know, I'm great at keeping secrets.
487
00:19:32,044 --> 00:19:33,711
Especially one that
could get you transferred
488
00:19:33,779 --> 00:19:37,781
to some hole-in-the wall branch
on the outer rim of Toronto.
489
00:19:37,817 --> 00:19:41,218
I just need a tiny favour.
490
00:19:41,286 --> 00:19:43,153
Okay. What do you need?
491
00:19:45,690 --> 00:19:48,291
Good news, m'lovelies!
492
00:19:48,327 --> 00:19:51,361
New computers. You can thank Howard.
493
00:19:51,396 --> 00:19:52,396
Wait. What?
494
00:19:52,397 --> 00:19:53,863
- Mm-hm.
- Why?
495
00:19:53,898 --> 00:19:55,898
All those stickers say
"Property of Midtown Library."
496
00:19:55,967 --> 00:19:58,135
That is why I printed up these.
497
00:19:58,170 --> 00:20:00,170
Look at you, boss-lady.
498
00:20:00,205 --> 00:20:01,904
Did you leverage my
relationship with Isla
499
00:20:01,973 --> 00:20:03,840
for these new computers?
500
00:20:07,212 --> 00:20:10,880
So, I just need a book from
you for our staff picks' shelf.
501
00:20:10,915 --> 00:20:13,517
How about "The Betrayal"
by Kate Furnivall?
502
00:20:13,552 --> 00:20:16,485
Ooh, a romantic!
503
00:20:16,521 --> 00:20:17,553
Welcome to the team.
504
00:20:20,391 --> 00:20:23,425
- Gimme that.
- Okay.
505
00:20:23,494 --> 00:20:25,227
Welcome home, computer.
506
00:20:27,395 --> 00:20:28,460
Hi, you new here?
507
00:20:28,496 --> 00:20:30,529
Sorry, what?
508
00:20:30,564 --> 00:20:32,797
Um, yeah. Uh, yes.
509
00:20:32,833 --> 00:20:34,166
I... I am.
510
00:20:34,201 --> 00:20:36,168
I'm new. To the branch, that is.
511
00:20:36,203 --> 00:20:37,802
I'm a new transfer. Howard.
512
00:20:37,838 --> 00:20:40,905
- Sheila.
- Do you work here as well?
513
00:20:40,973 --> 00:20:43,207
Sort of. I run the settlement desk.
514
00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:45,510
But on Saturdays I bring
Wendy a little something.
515
00:20:45,545 --> 00:20:46,644
Oh.
516
00:20:46,679 --> 00:20:48,212
Did you bring me a little something?
517
00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:51,015
I'm... I'm sorry. That
was terribly awkward.
518
00:20:51,051 --> 00:20:53,217
I don't have a coffee for you, but...
519
00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:57,988
- Thank you.
- Nice to meet you, Howard.
520
00:21:03,496 --> 00:21:04,862
Hey, Wendy. Here's your coffee.
521
00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:05,897
Thank you!
522
00:21:05,898 --> 00:21:07,865
Mm!
523
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:10,934
She's way out of your
league, Big Library.
524
00:21:11,002 --> 00:21:12,936
So, "Big Library's" sticking, huh?
525
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:19,400
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
526
00:21:19,450 --> 00:21:24,000
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